#but now they're broke and can't go
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my birthday is in less than a month and i have zero plans.
#i don't even like celebrating birthdays#i was talking to my friends while back about maybe the 3 of us going to the coast#and i just reached out to see if they still wanted to#but now they're broke and can't go#so i guess i'll do the same thing i do every friday night#get stoned as fuck and watch silly little tv shows#i'll ring in 34 the same way i run in 30#doing absolutely nothing
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Oh my god it all happened exactly like I said it would ToT and Peter was so mean! "I know why you did it-" "--To help my friend!" "--and because you're a criminal, and I was an idiot for expecting more" PETER. Like I get it he's got a skeleton in his closet now and that's a fucked up thing to do to someone, but the boy HAD. NO. CHOICE. And also Peter! Peter Burke!! ASAC PETER BURKE?? You've done illegal shit before! What about the Burke 7 or whatever number? What about telling Neal to flee the Marshals when it was illegal because 'He didn't deserve it'? You were right!!! You already know that the law is not always what is just, and the just thing is the right thing, you just cannot apply it to yourself right now! PETER. PETER
God El is fighting for Neal's life right now. Our woman in the trenches carrying his broken body through the gunfire trying to save that relationship. She's so right and bless.
Jones is NOT helping and it would be fine if Dianna was there to balance him out but she just had a BABY and is on maternity leave and it's a perfect storm of hell TuT
And now Hagen has Neal's stupid girlfriend who it's been so so clear is evil since her first scene but he's too fool to see he's getting played and she's been 'kidnapped' by (read: working with) Hagen and Neal won't go to Peter bc Peter basically told him to go die, and everyone but Mozzie and El is making terrible decisions every 3 seconds and
#white collar#this is making my life significantly worse rip#PETER get your shit together I am about to smack you clear to Wisconsin!!! Neal gave up everything for you and you can't even thank him!!!#You can't even tell him you understand or you care about him despite it. I'm going to wring your neck#Elizabeth out here fighting out here carrying the last flickering embers of hope on her back#loved Peter going 'I can't believe he did this' and her going 'I told him to do whatever it took this is my fault' and Peter going 'no no h#broke the law not you' and her going 'and you know what? I'm GLAD he did it!! He was right!!! You were innocent and the system failed you!'#My queen....#Loved the episode where there's Peter's ex cozying up to him and El is like 'is she trying to steal my man?' so she calls in Neal to help h#r stalk them like they are his wife and his consort fr the third member of that marriage and right now they're the only functional part ofi
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pessimistic speculation about the future of BC in the tags
#i can't believe i'm saying this but i think this might be it#i don't see how they can go on as blind channel without joel. i'm really sorry but i just don't#and i don't mean to say joel is somehow more significant than the rest of them but. it's JOEL#to me he is the heart and soul of the band. the driving force#and besides i think without joel's vocals they lose something significant of the band's _sound_#it won't sound like blind channel anymore. it won't BE blind channel anymore#when zayn left 1D i thought the same but in a band with so many vocalists the effect of one voice missing is just not as drastic#but a blind channel song with only niko's vocals? it's just not going to be the same#so i'm really sorry for saying this but from now on i think it's just a matter of time we get The Final Announcement#that the band in its entirety has parted ways#and we can kiss blind channel goodbye for once and for all#they can fool themselves (and us) that they're going to try and keep the band alive without joel#but i think eventually they'll notice it's just not the same#so yay my favourite band ever in the world just practically broke up how's your saturday going lol#still waiting to wake up from this bizarre nightmare. or for them to tell us this is just an april fool's joke gone wrong#they scheduled it for april 1 but for some reason it didn't show up until now? yes that's the only plausible explanation :)
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New game interest unlocked
(crow in bottom right belongs to @patchwork-crow-writes)
#ramarl#phantasy star online#long tag warning lol i rambled#so i was introduced to phantasy star online#i think its safe to say i really enjoy the game#thank you mr crow for showing me this game :D i have new creatures to scribble now#there shall be more of these doodles#i promise you that#meant to post this wayyyyy earlier today but uh#my car broke down :') ....again :')#last week it wouldn't turn on and the headlights weren't working so we were like ''ok this is a battery issue and i need a new one''#because jumping the car didnt fix it#so we took my old battery to a shop and they tested its charge before showing us which new one we should get#but the battery had charge???????? so we went back home to troubleshoot#and then found the hooks(?idk what they're called) that connected the battery to the car had something corroded on them#so we grabbed a can of coke and scrubbed away#hooked the battery back up and bam car was working#so the issue was those hooks#until two days ago when my car didnt work again#looked at the battery again and the hooks came loose; tightened them up and bam car working again#and now at this point I'm scared to go anywhere cause what if i get stranded on my own??#so this morning i said ''alright I'm gonna drive myself to church just to be sure that my car works''#AND WOULD YOU GUESS WHAT HAPPENED#at this point i just wish the damn battery was dead and that i could replace it and move on from this#i know they're a bit pricey but jesus this is exhausting#but i can't just buy a new battery if im not sure that's the actual problem because then I'd have a battery and nothing to do with it#i hate having a car sometimes i just want a bus system#or a jeep#but preferably a bus system#sorry rambles thats a long way of saying i didnt post this earlier because ive been working on my car lol
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just had like the worst ever mental breakdown
and it all started because of the FUCKING OFFICE.
the COMEDY. TV. SHOW.
what is my life i am such an idiot
#michael promised 15 kids college tuition#he let them go their whole lives thinking they were set#that they were going to be able to go to college and pursue their dreams#and then he forgets about it until the school calls him up and is like hey#give us the money they're graduating#and he lets them invite him to the school and celebrate him and then he's like#sorry i'm actually broke#none of you are going to college#and i just broke down crying for them because i've been so overstressed this week#ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#i need to get out of here#i need to read fanfiction all day every day and never stress#the one time i don't have weekend homework and i try to have a nice afternoon this happens#i feel like an idiot right now#sorry for yapping like this#i feel like i can't even tag this as the office#like i really like the show don't get me wrong#this was just one time the writing was NOT funny#michael shouldn't get to feel better after that#anyways#going to read some fanfiction now
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how do i tell my roommate that her cat repeatedly pissing on and destroying my things is something that people usually offer to clean or replace or apologize for instead of shrugging off
#there's always garbage scattered along the floor she has a million shoes that somehow end up under my bed#she fucking leaves her cat alone for days and days bc 'if he gets hungry he'll rip open the cat food bag' ?????#her cat killed one of her turtles bc of their shitty housing and the other one's visibly terrified to bask in the fucking#led light that gives off no heat that i TOLD her was wrong and unhealthy months ago#she never cleans said turtle's tank even though the algae bloom is currently insane#her shit takes up like 80% of the room for exactly zero reason#and i cant use my closet because rascal pissed in it over the month long break and she did nothing about it#meaning the whole closet smells so much like piss that any clothes that stay there will smell like piss#it's fucking filthy in here and she never cleans obviously but it also makes it harder for me to clean bc her shit's everywhere#can you please maybe just take some of the trash out before you go cheat on your boyfriend please#(<- at least im pretty sure that's what's going on? might be more of an open relationship)#your cat is fucking violent and filthy because you never hang out with him or clean anything#and next year i'll be gone (im Not living like this for another year) and someone else is going to put you into debt#charging you for the things your cat ruined or they're going to abuse him again and you don't even seem to care#bc you're too busy buying sorority merch and thinking about new tattoos and shit#i want broke ppl to have fun and to buy/do things that make them happy but her negligence literally has a body count now#bc she refuses to keep a turtle she's had for over a year in anything but shallow unprotected tupperware#a small glass tank isn't that expensive especially not compared to tattoos!! you Can save for this#and more importantly you Should have saved for this before getting a fucking living thing in your house#she kept her dead turtle rotting in our room for about three weeks. just. in a cup by the sink#and there's nowhere the cat can't reach so im terrified every time i leave that he's gonna piss on my mattress or something#that i'd be financially responsible for (or else that'd leave the poor inheriter of this room in filth) and couldn't really clean properly#and unfortunately i like talking to her so much and im so dogshit with confrontation that i never say anything#world's biggest sucker award!! fucking. christ on a cracker#like he's pissed on my SHOES. he's scratching up everything in here#and i don't want to pay outta my ass or spend a bunch of time trying to fix her cat for her#because contrary to popular belief i have shit to do!! i do not have the energy to have a cat That's Why I Don't Have One!!!!!#and i can't go to the RA bc she's not supposed to have any of these animals#if rascal gets taken from her chances are he's gonna get euthanized at our local shelter and i can't take him in bc of my dogs#but why doesn't she ever stop to think about how this might be affecting me?? my standards are not that high!!!!
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Every day I wake up, I'm full of inspiration and ambition, I lollygag a bit, I kinda skirt around it, I actively avoid The Thing I WANT to do. Then I just kinda give up and do something else.
#idk what's up w this but like. the more intensely i WANT the more i can't bring myself to do it.#like feh example like you'd think bc it's ALL i'm on about. i'd be deeply IN the source material#and i have felt i've been away doing my own thing for too long i need to revisit it. i Need to#but for some reason it's unbearable. not bad. i just can't bear it. i do NOT know what's up w that#i wanna keep listening to a playlist too (hoping it's still up) but like. i broke away. and i am struggling to return.#AND LIKE. BEYOND FEH. i feel this about video games in general like i have to do something that requires no commitment.#labyrinth of galleria was great for this. for some INEXPLICABLE reason. it is just a COMPLETELY different experience#like. the feelings i feel when playing galleria vs like etrian odyssey where i'm VERY attached to my guys#the most upsetting side effect is i feel like i'm losing alfonse's voice like i feel like i used to be able#to mimic his speech patterns PERFECTLY. but everything just feels off or not cleaned up enough#and again i can't fucking bear it. like i am almost going to fucking cry about it. like what is wrong here.#like WHY can't i get myself to DO. THE THINGS. I LIKE. THAT BRING ME JOY. THE COMMITMENT.#i think i'm also worried like i don't wanna get to the point where like. my blorbos are unrecognizable.#spent too much time in my head and now they're all warped and weird. but like. like. for some reason.#esp if i feel this INTENSE fucking affinity it's like. i get in this weird headspace where can't look directly at it.#i should do ANYTHING else. what is my fucking PROBLEM.#does anybody have a cure. or do i just give up forever.
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DCC OC that calls the viewers "chat"
#this message was brought to you by autixel#dungeon crawler carl#can they actually talk to the viewers? no. because it's funnier that way.#they wouldn't be a yoo joonghyuk like character they'd be more like han sooyoung#in terms of personality. i could make them a streamer tho that could be fun. can't get more than like. a couple dozen viewers#maybe once or twice they broke 100.#they'd be a college student.#they went out for a smoke while their friends were in a bar. then the bar collapsed behind them‚ and they entered the dungeon#i need to make more nuanced characters my characters feel copy paste copy paste >:/ but I LIKE THIS ONE BEING A LIL SHIT#ooh maybe. maybe. they do get serious in serious situations. like a switch has been flipped. they get player killer skulls.#the charm is a facade. an appeal to the viewers. they're entertaining. Sonya#Sonya... i see you now.#you were scared. you were young. you'd never seen death. but seeing dismembered limbs of bar-goers and your party slain has changed you.#you were scared until you saw the game. till you realized. then it slipped into place. the charisma. the attitude. you had put on shows b4#it didn't bring you joy to kill those people. your people were killed. however. it was them or you. you wanted to live.#in this hellhole the world came to. you want to live. you want to get out. you're thinking about trying to make it to the exit deal.#assuming you don't die sooner. you prefer a sword. feels personal that way. I'm making you transgender. you chose doppelganger as your race.#in all the floors you manage to get through‚ there's one thing you hold on to. your lighter. it was a gift for your birthday. it's empty now#in the beginning floors you'd watch it spark and combust. it was normal. it was familiar. you just haven't felt a need to refill it.#the same lighter you carry is the same that lit your cigarette that night. it's one of the few things in your inventory that isn't dungeon#well. not magical. and even fewer things are from before. and what could be more complicated than the thing you held when everything went to#shit. you remember the stress of the upcoming semester. trivial in comparison to the stress you're under now.#you wonder if you're going grey. you wonder if you could fix it. the thought disturbs you. you miss when games were fun.
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i just want you to know that I've started watching The Fantastic Race (I'd never heard of it before) and i too cannot stop imagining Andreil in it.. but also a Foxes/Exy only edition.
like, one is Foxes only, 10 teams, either with some of the freshmen, or while Seth is still alive/in an AU where he survives.
one is Andreil against other Americans where they dominate everything
and one is Andreil, Kevin/jeremy, riko/jean, and some other teams from other American Exy teams
i will eat this thing upppp!! please write it, i beg of you lmao
I do love me some Amazing Race. I think I could give you a Miracle Year of Collegiate Exy version of the Amazing Race.
I think maybe after their initial run through and victory Neil and Andrew are like absolute fan favorites and even though Neil, Andrew, nor the show ever say it there is a general belief that Neil and Andrew got together BECAUSE of the show. Any follow-up publicity on it has Neil and Andrew just staring at the camera like "Are u for fucking real?"
The thing with these shows is that fan favorites get asked to go back ALL the time and Neil gets a lot of very lucrative sponsorships that make the Moriyamas VERY happy after it.
They offer the same deal, a cut on the % that they will take from earnings and this time it's just for competing and this time it's a deal given to. They want the Miracle Generation of the Foxes to come and if every one does then Ichirou will lower Neil, Jean, and Kevin's %s owed to 50% (Maybe the deals are that good, maybe Ichirou is a big fan of the show, maybe he has a finger in it's production. This is mostly just like rationale on why the fuck they'd all do this. Especially Neil and Andrew since like Andrew had a bad time on those planes).
Either way not a single Fox disagrees. Arrangements are made for everyone's kids / pets. Shit is talked.
The Miracle Generation Race is ON.
The Teams are As Follows:
(Fox) Neil Josten & Andrew Minyard (Orange) (Dating)
(Fox) Kevin Day & David Wymack (Green) (Father-Son)
(Fox) Dan Wilds-Boyd & Matt Wilds-Boyd (Yellow) (Married)
(Fox) Allison Reynolds & Renee Johnson (Pink) (BFFs)
(Fox) Aaron Minyard & Katelyn Minyard (Blue) (Engaged)
(Fox) Nicky Klose & Erik Klose (Purple) (Married)
(Trojan) Jean Moreau & Jeremy Knox (Red) (Dating)
(Raven) Johnson & Reacher (Black) (Friends)
(Trojan) Alvarez & Laila (White) (Dating)
(Raven) Thea Muldani & Jenkins (Teal) (Friends)
(Penn) Penn State Coach & Penn State Captain (Grey) (Friends? IDK I ran out of people to be honest and thought well maybe we just have some throwaway team to lose first)
One of the funnier things I could do with that is that this Miracle season is also fan favorite season too and they want the cast to come back but no one can be with their same partner again. So you get shit like Neil and Jean, Jeremy and Andrew, Allison and Kevin, Renee and Aaron, Wymack and Nicky, etc.
#Neil and Andrew are like 'yeah we're not trying that hard'#but then Aaron and Katelyn pass them at a Detour and it's like 'Oh fuck that running.' and proceed to have the MOST insane rivalry#Neil and Andrew actually trying because they just can't tolerate any of their friends / family beating them#Like it was FINE last season they just had to do pretty well and Ichirou would be fine with it#This season? It's fucking PERSONAL.#Catch Allison nailing any and all of those fashion related ones#Renee always is a hit with the locals and can get anywhere easily#Matt just has the MUSCLE to be able to just force through the challenges#Dan's unyielding spirit pushes them past their most difficult challenges#Nicky and Erik flat out just have the benefit of being EU citizens#Aaron and Katelyn have a thirst for blood because they have medical school debt to pay off#Honestly the foxes have already decided that they get the reward money but they're not TELLING THEM THAT#The Ravens are the race heels#Like full on fuck those guys#Is the energy everyone has#At one point Allison just flat out pays one of their taxis to go to the wrong place#Thea keeps trying to talk to Kevin and everyone keeps getting in the way of that#They broke up like a year beforehand and it's AWKWARD (tm) but Kevin is doing so much better now#All for the Race (A Season of Miracles) AU#AFTG#AFTG AU#The Palmetto State Foxes
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i don't like drake BUT
#free chicken slider on his birthday? don't mind if i do#tyyy dave's hot chicken#my lunch plan for thursday#trying to see if any of my friends will go with me tho#hate going places alone#two of my friends are busy urgh#the others didn't respond yet smh#but that's bc they don't check their messages so idk why i was expecting#anyways will ask when i see them#even if they're busy wtvr#ill still go#will probably just get to go tho if i go alone#but me and my friends have been meaning to go there together for a while#now they can't say 'im too broke for that'#THEY WILL GO OR ELSE#or else idk i'll be sad or smth wtvr#but yeahhh free food later this week yippee#☆— yapping
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Genuinely the only plot I can imagine for the Snow sequel is a conflict in the North where newly independent Northerners reject the leader that was assigned to them and instead want the King that they chose. Since GOT demonized magic and destroyed the Others, whatever conflict they have is going to have to be primarily political. Jon can navigate being a leader to the Wildings while feeling conflicted about his responsibilities to the North...or something along those lines.
#now don't get me wrong I want this sequel show killed with fire but I can't help but speculate cause there's genuinely so little wiggle room#for a story continuation because the GOT finale was so terribly written and nonsensical#me personally I'd start the sequel off with Jon waking up after being resurrected and have the last few seasons be a premonition 🤷🏾♀️#or just straight up revive Dany but we know they're doubling down on that terrible ending#the show starts and we find out Arya was lying about traveling and instead makes a u-turn to go visit Jon#she just didn't want Sansa to know where she was going cause she doesn't trust her after she broke her oath sdsdkdskdskdfsk#and that's how we get them reuniting with their direwolves and discovering their warging abilities 👆🏾
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anyone know some fun activities to do with a 4 year old without leaving the house
#we're both going insane in here bc the weather isn't really allowing us to just walk outside#and we were gonna go to the movies but the car that was gonna take us broke down yesterday and is in a shop now#i love this kid like crazy but for heavens sake we need something to do other than stacking blocks and pushing cars on the floor#me especially like. he's not even fuzzy or angry but i am getting increasingly bored and he needs to be doing something at all times#so i can't just. sit down and read or watch stuff on tv or embroider#because i have to be giving him attention and company#which of course i'll keep doing bc i want him to have fun but like. i NEED time for me or at least to do something we'll both enjoy#i'm running out of ideas#(context i guess. my little brother and i have an enormous age gap#my parents asked me to care for him for a couple weeks bc they're swamped with work so now here we are#like they're under the impression i am excellent with kids which is not true#i'm not bad at taking care of children but i'm not like. ecstatic or passionate about it#like i wouldn't ever think of pursuing a profession that involved childcare#but i'm trying my best rn#anyways ideas for fun things to do inside are appreciated
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Someone's tiny child drew a Something and they put it in their box saying the kid drew it for me. Which is cute, I guess. My mom did stuff like this when I was a small child who was obsessed with the arrival of mail. It's in the route's case to be immortalized forever.
Now to figure out how to read the drawing so I can find what I assume is treasure beyond my wildest imagination.
#girl if this isn't a treasure map i don't know what is#Lucas knows something i don't know. but he's three so he can't tell me in words.#i just have to interpret the drawing. somehow. at least it's color coded. that helps.#the back of the page says something about how he asks where the mail is every day#she wrote that he watches for my truck but they're in the woods so i know they can't see me approach#maybe she meant he listens for the truck. it's definitely loud enough to hear from a ways away.#whatever the case. little guy tried.#i always keep drawings from kids. even though i don't like kids. there's just something raw about what they draw.#no talent. no knowledge of fundamentals. but also no fear of being cringe or failing. just vibes.#i have so many things my brother and sister drew as little littles in a drawer with my art stuff and my sister wants me to toss it all#like. no dude. you drew a 'flower' when you were 4 and I'll have it until that paper crumbles to dust.#it's from a time before you could do anything to show you appreciate the people in your life in the same way you can now#a time when a shitty drawing was the best way to say 'hey. we're cool. i appreciate your presence'#i have one from my brother from when i broke up with my hogh school boyfriend that's a transformer (i think?)#and it says - in kid spelling - i hope you aren't so sad soon#like. he was 5 or 6 when he made that. guy didn't know what i was going through. he just wanted me to feel better.#something something humans find a way to communicate with one another despite language barriers and shit
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so tired of being a shitty bandaid for my parents' loneliness. like have u ever considered you passed your curse to me and some days i feel so lonely it's like i can't breathe around the emptiness in my chest????
#my dad is like#you can't just be in your room all the time then what's the point of you living here if ill be sitting here all alone then#and im like bhai what#mom also says this to me she always wanted to sit and rant and she used to say you never talk to me#both of these people don't even fucking get it that they're not even interested in me listening to me#mom just wants a sounding board for her venting and dad just wants someone to pretend everything is okay and happy all the time and#the only important things in life is the immediate present and food and making money and stuff#i swear this is why i feel so ????? about myself my identity like no i can't describe myself#because there is no myself there is just a white sheet of paper where people can write whatever they want#im so tired man#why can't they just go and live with each other and leave us kids out of it 😭🙏#like i genuinely am getting teary eyed about such a small thing but god. i want to have my own life so bad. im sick of feeling all these#complicated emotions guilt and anger and pity and obligation and duty like just god pls fuck off#people my age are so fucking mature and put together than me so confident so clear about their path#have friends partners breakups parties just so many new memories#and im just stuck.#and im fine with it now because i get it studying is really important and this is quite basic requirement to be perfect at#atleast my syllabus to survive in this industry#but then. let me do that only. please don't make me pretend to like you like spending time with you and everything#ive hated you for like. idk 14 whole years. since the first time you hit mom in front of me#i remember it so well like my childhood broke that day you slammed her into a wall for some stupid fight and her hair was all messy and#untied and you shouted so loud i thought surely everyone can hear. and then you left to roam around the city at night with your friends#i remember this because my mom and my sister sent me to check up on you with the excuse of a painting of a parrot that i had made#i didn't understand anything back then#but yeah fuck you fuck you fuck you for being so fucking delusional thinking i love you or something#ive prayed to god that you die and i still do#it would directly mean 4 people being happy#anyway#dni#this was meant to be fun and short lol fuck
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okay. can someone reassure me that I will have other chances to see the northern lights because I am feeling very end of the world-y right now
#i was so excited that i caught a big storm this time and i drove out to see it#and you can't see them w the naked eye here but you could in night mode#but. my phone doesn't have a night mode.#its supposed to and i googled it for an hour but my phone is old and none of the settings are where they're supposed to be#i followed a guide on how to manipulate the pro mode to be a night mode but i still don't have the settings he was talking about#and sitting on the ground while everyone talks about how cool the lights are when i can't figure it out kind of. broke something in me idk#are strong solar storms as common as they seem to have been this year? if i travel one day very far north a few times will i ever see them#because i feel like i missed both of my fucking chances and this is the only thing on my bucket list#and now im crying on a road in a town i don't know and i don't want to go home bc my mom will laugh at me#i asked her if she would drive out to meet me here and she said no#im trying really hard to be positive about this but ive never ever seen news about solar storms like this until this year#and im really worried i will never see one again bc these were freak events or something#please don't give me tips or ''you should have done x'' because i want to kms rn and that will not help at all
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fucking fucking fuckity fuck fuck fuck
#i'm just screaming into the void so i don't scream for real#ignore this#i swear to god my roommates can be such assholes#like fuck!!!!#it's not enough that i can't use the kitchen as a kitchen because it's always trashed#they gotta eat almost all of the frozen stuff i buy for myself since i can't cook anything real#what the fuck am i supposed to do with ten tater tots fuck#FUCK#and i can't even go out and grab anything now#because i don't have a new car yet#and even if i did one of them had to take my debit card cause they're both broke#just fuck me i guess
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