#but now she must put herself back together her past present and future every era of her

[onelastbreath-writes]

I Spy

Pairing: Frankie “Catfish” Morales/Fem!Reader (AFAB, no y/n)

Word Count: 1.7K

Warnings: Brief mention of bad(abusive/manipulative) parents, general adult topics, swearing.

Summary: You meet a cute guy at a bar, you date, you fall in love, and oops, it turns out you’ve both been lying about your careers. Classified only stays classified until you get assigned a mission together. (SpecOps&Spies, with Young!Frankie)

A/N: Hey guys, I was bad and started another fic. Whoops. This one is for Triple Frontier because I love that soft boi Francisco. The flavour of this fic, the vibe if you will, is basically the spiderman pointing meme. I’ve vaguely set the timeline to like mid-2000s? so I’ll be trying my best to stay true to technology and aesthetic of the era. There was so much denim. Anyways, that means I’m trying to write for about a 27-33 year old Frankie and a similarly aged reader. I don’t see this series being more than a couple chapters at best, so it’ll be short and sweet. Also, like, very little angst if I can help it; I just want this one to be a good, cute, fun read. Hope y’all enjoy! Xoxo

[AO3][Masterlist]

“So, you’re coming out tonight, right? You’re not busy or anything?”

“Please don’t say it like that, you know how busy work actually is. And I’m a grown woman; if I didn’t want to go to a shady dive bar with you and your very loud friends from the office, I’d say so,” You loved your best friend, and you missed spending time together, but you really couldn’t say the same for her co-workers.

You had nothing against the women she worked with, and you found that they were all perfectly lovely and usually quite fun to be around… it was just that when the alcohol came out, the volume control and verbal filters disappeared.

You wouldn’t say that barhopping was what you’d prefer to be doing tonight, along with more or less babysitting your friend and her friends, but you didn’t know when you’d next be able to squeeze in a night off to just hang out and have fun, so this was happening. You would laugh and smile and keep the drunk secretaries from going home with questionable people, and then you would look back on your ladies’ night with fond memories until you could eventually attend another.

You had known when you picked your career that it would be an around-the-clock, all-day, every-day sort of thing. You never deluded yourself into thinking you would have much of a social life or long-term relationships. Most partners, hell even most friends, would have a problem with you jetting off for weekends, or disappearing for days at a time under mountains of paperwork and appointments.

It just made your best friend that much more important to you. You’d met as kids, went through years of school beside each other, hung out, did stupid teenager things and then stupid young adult things together. You’d cried and laughed and fought and made up a million times, you’d gone to different colleges and still kept in touch, moved away, moved back, and you were still going strong. She was your ride-or-die, your anchor and your parachute and everything in between, so if you could use some of your precious, hoarded, blink-and-you’ll-miss-it time off to see her, that’s just what you’d do.

“You should take some of that fire, and direct it at your boss. Tell him no for a change. I’d love to see his face at that!” She meant well, always trying to look out for you and your health when it came to your beyond demanding job. You weren’t even allowed to tell her a fraction of what you were doing in your professional life, and she knew it, but that didn’t stop her from being ready to throw fists at your employer at a moment’s notice.

“One does not simply tell the über-rich that they don’t need to fly to Paris, again. Being a PA is a full-time nannying gig, except your charge is an adult who can argue when you say no, and you cannot put them on timeout when they’re being a brat. Where he goes, I go, and unless something drastic happens, it will probably continue on like that for a while.” She laughed at your jokes, and your heart hurt a little less at her glee. You knew she would never give up on you or blame you for your work being unpredictable, but that didn’t make the sting of last-minute cancels and missed outings hurt any less, for either of you.

“But it must be nice, just getting on a plane and going somewhere amazing at the drop of a hat. Travelling the world like a superstar, meeting people, having amazing adventures with mysterious strangers…”

“Easy there, Mamma Mia, your wanderlust is showing. And I’d take you with me in a heartbeat if I could. You were born to be a jetsetter, not to be stuck in this town with nothing but the office cubicle beside you to stare at. And I still think you should apply for one of those immersive culture grants you keep mooning over. They’d be fools not to fund your writing expedition!” She was an incredible person, three full degrees to her name in the time it took a normal student to get one, and a brain that could run miles around the rest of the professionals in her field. But she was tethered to this quiet backwater town, and she wasn’t free to fly like she deserved.

“You know I can’t just… go, like you can. My mom, it’d just break her heart… I don’t want to leave her alone, not after Dad,” You honestly doubted that you’d ever meet a woman more horrible and undeserving of her own daughter’s kindness. Helen was a parasite full of lies and manipulations and greed, and she had attached herself like a bad rash to your friend after she’d chased away the rest of her family members.

Your friend searched for the good in everyone, but you wished she’d stop looking for it at that home.

“You deserve your own happiness and freedom, and she should be encouraging you to spread your wings if and when you’re ready.” Politicking your friend was never something you enjoyed. She was the last person you wanted to use your negotiating credentials and sly subterfuge tactics against, but you wanted, needed, her safety and health more. You considered it almost bribery; dangling her dream future in front of her in exchange of being rid of the garbage in her life.

“Hey now, we’re getting way too deep into sad-drunk night conversations, and this is strictly a happy-fun-drunk night. Please leave all baggage and woes at the door, thank you!” You admitted your defeat and surrendered your verbal power point on Why Helen Needs to Disappear. You would get her next time for sure, give her the accelerant to burn down that bridge. “Anyways, the reason I called was to remind you of our haunt for the night. One of the girls, Kelly, you remember Kelly, found this adorable little hole in the wall. A total boys’ club apparently: darts, pool, sports games on the TV, but Kelly’s sister’s friend’s brother Tyler said the place was a favourite of the local army guys. So, if nothing else, we’ll at least have some hunks to look at for a while. It’ll be great!”

You jotted down the directions to the bar as she listed them, and the time you were expected to arrive there.

“Oh! And wear that cute little blue number you bought last spring; I know you still have it so don’t you dare lie. It makes your ass and legs look divine, and I think you could stand to make a new acquaintance tonight.” That Little Blue Number was buried in the back of your closet where you had hoped it would remain forever, but luck was not on your side tonight it seemed. But it did make you look, and feel, fantastic.  It was just so… breezy. “And heels! Real ones, not your cute little personal assistant kitten heels. Those black strappy ones would work like a dream!” You just sighed dramatically into the receiver and agreed to her demands.

“I’ll let you go now, and yes, I suppose I can be presentable tonight, dress and all. See-ya later!”

---

Hole in the wall was right. This place was basically underground it was so on the D.L. It was warm inside though, and in the middle of autumn with so much skin on display, you could not be more pleased to get away from the chilled outside air.

You would describe the interior as comfortable with a hint of rustic; lots of warm dark wood and low lights, mixed with the soft Latin music crooning in the background and the few patrons’ conversations adding to the ambience.

All in all, it was probably the nicest dive bar you’d been to in your hometown.

Your party was easy to spot where they had claimed a group of pushed together tables towards the far side of the establishment, and you carefully made your way over to them in your tricky high heels.

You said your hellos to returning faces and introduced yourself to the new additions, and accepted the chair you were pointed to and the drink pressed into your hand.

And so, the hours rolled.

You had enjoyed two fruity cocktails and a flaming shot before you called it quits on the alcohol for the night. You still had a few hours to sober up enough to drive home safely, and you would be able to help the girls get to their rides and ways home too. You appreciated having a social drink or two, but you didn’t care for hangovers and would happily take slightly tipsy over party-hard drunk anytime. Plus, your contract stated you were on-call, always, and you could be required to navigate high-stress negotiations at the drop of a hat. It was just better to cut yourself off, then reap the consequences of your actions later.

You tapped your friend’s shoulder as you walked past and leaned over to talk into her ear. “I’m getting some water for the table; do you want anything else?”

“Mmmm, no I think we’re good for now, thanks!” She was plastered already, but she had a huge grin on her face and was laughing at her co-workers’ stories, so you considered it a win of a night. You gave her a pat goodbye and swayed your way to the bar.

But you just were not accounting for the uneven floorboards, or how much your heels affected your currently less than steady equilibrium, and before you could blink you were teetering over into a nasty fall.

“Whoa there, easy does it, muñequita” Arms wrapped around you and pulled you back into a warm chest. “Careful now, don’t go twisting an ankle in those fancy shoes.”

You certainly did not account for the man you turned around to face. Wow.

His hands glided respectfully from where he had caught you around the waist to your still bent and held out elbows, steadying you as you swayed dangerously again.

Warm brown eyes, soft brown curls, and the sweetest smile you’d ever seen. It felt like your heart was going to beat out of your chest, and you knew that it wasn’t left over adrenaline from your near wipeout. He was gorgeous and handling you so gently, and you wanted to spend forever in that moment.

“Hey there, palomita, I’m Frankie, can I buy you a drink?”

[Next Part]

[sage-nebula]

how would you have liked rins story to go since you hate the cannon?

How I would have wanted it to go before Yashahime came along and showed us that Sesshoumaru is a child grooming pedophile differs from how I would have wanted it to go now that Yashahime is here and Sesshoumaru is a confirmed child grooming pedophile. 

Before Yashahime: 

Rin is an ordinary human girl in basically every sense of the word except for her upbringing. Due to the tragedy that is her life, Rin has seen both the worst of humans (her parents being murdered, her neighbors in her home village abusing her) and the best of demons (Sesshoumaru saving her life and taking her in). Throughout her travels with Sesshoumaru, she has also seen that there are good humans (e.g. Kagome, Sango, the villagers in Kaede’s village) and evil demons (Naraku, other demons Sesshoumaru fought). During her formative childhood years, Rin was put in a place where any biases she might have formed about humans or demons were thrown out the window, so that she could see with her own eyes that one’s nature doesn’t define you, but rather, your choices do.

So what I would have liked is that instead of her growing up to be a priestess like Kaede, or a slayer like Kohaku, is for her instead to choose to be a sort of ambassador between humans and demons. Because just because someone is a demon doesn’t mean they’re evil, and just because someone is a human doesn’t mean they’re good, and she knows from her own experience that it is possible for demons and humans to coexist and even cohabitate. She could still learn medicine from Kaede, and some self-defense from Kohaku, but given Rin’s personality I think it’s more likely she’d want to try to talk things out rather than fight. If that’s the case, then I imagine Kohaku would actually end up going with her whenever she set out on her journey to try to bring demons and humans together so that he could protect her when negotiations went south.

As for her relationship with Sesshoumaru, while Sesshoumaru is definitely her father-figure and her guardian, I imagine that Rin’s dream of bringing demons and humans together would end up conflicting with Sesshoumaru’s own prejudices and they’d end up butting heads over this, hence why she’s not traveling with him. Rin would point out to him that’s dumb for him to be prejudiced against half-demons and humans when he took care of her and Kohaku, and he’d say “that’s different” and Rin would say “how?!” and he’d not have an answer. He’d still protect her if she and Kohaku got in over their heads, but he’d never fully come around to supporting her quest to help bring demon and human societies together.

Rin’s work would also be work toward making life better for half-demons (and quarter-demons etc) too, since obviously she wouldn’t see a reason why they should be ostracized, and would point to Inuyasha being a hero many times over as to why half-demons should be celebrated. All in all, Rin would be an activist for demon-human relations, trying to push the fact that one’s nature doesn’t define them and that they can always make better choices. 

After Yashahime:

Sesshoumaru is a child grooming pedophile so I honestly don’t think it’s safe for Rin to stay in the feudal era anymore. He’s the most powerful demon in the warring states era and while I don’t think Kagome (if written IC) would hesitate to put a sacred arrow in his ass for trying to rape a child, Kagome can’t be around 24/7 to protect Rin, so honestly the best course of action would be to get Rin somewhere Sesshoumaru can’t reach her.

To that end, when Kagome came across Sesshoumaru trying to victimize Rin (by a twist of fate, let’s say she gets there in time), she does immediately draw an arrow on him and warns him to get away. The loud arguing ends up attracting the attention of Sango, Inuyasha, Miroku, and Shippou; Shippou gets Rin (who is confused and to be honest scared) to safety, and ultimately Sesshoumaru gets chased off . . . for now. But it’s only for now because Sesshoumaru tends to obsess, and Kagome knows that. 

So what ends up happening is that Kagome ends up taking Rin through the well to the modern era, to her family. She explains to them what’s going on, how it’s not safe for Rin in the feudal era right now, and she asks her mother and grandfather to take Rin in, at least for the time being, until they can figure out how to permanently end the risk that Sesshoumaru presents. Rin, of course, is still confused and upset by all of this. She doesn’t believe that Sesshoumaru would want to hurt her, she believes that he knows what’s best for her, she’s sure there has to be some misunderstanding. But Kagome asks her to just wait for the time being, and Rin trusts Kagome too, so she reluctantly agrees. Rin is set up in Kagome’s old room, and Kagome returns to the feudal era.

Since Rin never had any formal education, obviously she can’t just enroll in the local junior high with Souta. So Kagome’s mom ends up homeschooling her, at least so that she can get up to speed and eventually enroll in actual school should they get caught up before Kagome comes back for Rin. Kagome’s mother, having been filled in on all the trauma that Rin has suffered in her young life, also gets Rin enrolled with a therapist, albeit she makes sure Rin knows beforehand not to mention things like demons or being resurrected via magic. Instead, Rin can just talk about how her parents were killed, kidnappings, what her guardian Sesshoumaru wanted to do to her . . . etc. (Rin might end up accidentally mentioning her two deaths and resurrections anyway, but her therapist fortunately thinks Rin is just using metaphors.)

Rin also takes the time to get used to the modern era. The TV scares her at first, because she thinks the people must be trapped inside the box until she’s told that no, those are just pictures, it’s fine. Cars and planes definitely scare her; they’re so loud compared to Ah-Un, she doesn’t see why anyone wouldn’t prefer a dragon. She also doesn’t understand why there aren’t dragons or demons in the modern era, but then, no one else knows the answer to that either.

By the time Souta enters high school, Rin is caught up enough so that she can enroll in the local high school with him, because Kagome hasn’t come back yet. (And Rin has thought to try to use the well herself a couple times, to go back herself, but every time she gets to the edge she feels a terror she doesn’t understand and stays away from it.) School feels a bit overwhelming at first, but she ends up making friends pretty easily, and that makes the whole thing much less overwhelming for her, and much more fun.

Ultimately, who knows if Rin would ever go back to the feudal era, or if she’d even want to. I do imagine that Kagome would end up coming back with Inuyasha and infant Moroha, to introduce Moroha with her family. And Kagome would ask Rin how things were going, and Rin would say “good,” and the topic of Rin going back to the feudal era wouldn’t really be brought up. In the feudal era, Rin faced trauma after trauma after trauma, and was faced with the threat of her former guardian raping her. In the modern era, she has a warm, loving foster family, friends at school, a therapist to help her work through past trauma and a bright future. It’s not really a question of what she picks anymore, is it? 

But ultimately, no matter which of these paths was chosen, I think we can all agree they’re both better than her becoming a teen mom to rape babies and then being sealed into a tree for a decade. Rin deserved so much better. 

[surprisebitch]

My 10 All-time Fave Anime

I first wanna get it out there that there is still a lot of anime I plan to watch and have yet to finish. This current top 10 all-time fave list is based from anime I have completed. I am currently watching a lot of anime, so this list could potentially change!

Each synopsis comes from MyAnimeList. Here’s my profile if you’re interested, and feel free to send a friend request!

Anyway, onto the list! This is not in order btw, just 10 titles!

My 10 All-time Fave Anime

1. Given (2019)

Tightly clutching his Gibson guitar, Mafuyu Satou steps out of his dark apartment to begin another day of his high school life. While taking a nap in a quiet spot on the gymnasium staircase, he has a chance encounter with fellow student Ritsuka Uenoyama, who berates him for letting his guitar’s strings rust and break. Noticing Uenoyama’s knowledge of the instrument, Satou pleads for him to fix it and to teach him how to play. Uenoyama eventually agrees and invites him to sit in on a jam session with his two band mates: bassist Haruki Nakayama and drummer Akihiko Kaji.

Satou’s voice is strikingly beautiful, filling Uenoyama with the determination to make Satou the lead singer of the band. Though reticent at first, Satou takes the offer after an emotional meeting with an old friend. With the support of his new friends, Satou must not only learn how to play guitar, but also come to terms with the mysterious circumstances that led him to be its owner.

2. Rurouni Kenshin (1996)

In the final years of the Bakumatsu era lived a legendary assassin known as Hitokiri Battousai. Feared as a merciless killer, he was unmatched throughout the country, but mysteriously disappeared at the peak of the Japanese Revolution. It has been ten peaceful years since then, but the very mention of Battousai still strikes terror into the hearts of war veterans.

Unbeknownst to them, Battousai has abandoned his bloodstained lifestyle in an effort to repent for his sins, now living as Kenshin Himura, a wandering swordsman with a cheerful attitude and a strong will. Vowing never to kill again, Kenshin dedicates himself to protecting the weak. One day, he stumbles across Kaoru Kamiya at her kendo dojo, which is being threatened by an impostor claiming to be Battousai. After receiving help from Kenshin, Kaoru allows him to stay at the dojo, and so the former assassin temporarily ceases his travels.

Rurouni Kenshin: Meiji Kenkaku Romantan tells the story of Kenshin as he strives to save those in need of saving. However, as enemies from both past and present begin to emerge, will the reformed killer be able to uphold his new ideals?

3. Assassination Classroom (2015)

When a mysterious creature chops the moon down to a permanent crescent, the students of class 3-E of Kunugigaoka Middle School find themselves confronted with an enormous task: assassinate the creature responsible for the disaster before Earth suffers a similar fate. However, the monster, dubbed Koro-sensei (the indestructible teacher), is able to fly at speeds of up to Mach 20, which he demonstrates freely, leaving any attempt to subdue him in his extraterrestrial dust. Furthermore, the misfits of 3-E soon find that the strange, tentacled beast is more than just indomitable—he is the best teacher they have ever had.

Adapted from the humorous hit manga by Yuusei Matsui, Ansatsu Kyoushitsu tells the story of these junior high pupils as they polish their assassination skills and grow in order to stand strong against the oppressive school system, their own life problems, and one day, Koro-sensei.

4. My Hero Academia (2016)

The appearance of “quirks,” newly discovered super powers, has been steadily increasing over the years, with 80 percent of humanity possessing various abilities from manipulation of elements to shapeshifting. This leaves the remainder of the world completely powerless, and Izuku Midoriya is one such individual.

Since he was a child, the ambitious middle schooler has wanted nothing more than to be a hero. Izuku’s unfair fate leaves him admiring heroes and taking notes on them whenever he can. But it seems that his persistence has borne some fruit: Izuku meets the number one hero and his personal idol, All Might. All Might’s quirk is a unique ability that can be inherited, and he has chosen Izuku to be his successor!

Enduring many months of grueling training, Izuku enrolls in UA High, a prestigious high school famous for its excellent hero training program, and this year’s freshmen look especially promising. With his bizarre but talented classmates and the looming threat of a villainous organization, Izuku will soon learn what it really means to be a hero.

5. Attack on Titan (2013)

Centuries ago, mankind was slaughtered to near extinction by monstrous humanoid creatures called titans, forcing humans to hide in fear behind enormous concentric walls. What makes these giants truly terrifying is that their taste for human flesh is not born out of hunger but what appears to be out of pleasure. To ensure their survival, the remnants of humanity began living within defensive barriers, resulting in one hundred years without a single titan encounter. However, that fragile calm is soon shattered when a colossal titan manages to breach the supposedly impregnable outer wall, reigniting the fight for survival against the man-eating abominations.

After witnessing a horrific personal loss at the hands of the invading creatures, Eren Yeager dedicates his life to their eradication by enlisting into the Survey Corps, an elite military unit that combats the merciless humanoids outside the protection of the walls. Based on Hajime Isayama’s award-winning manga, Shingeki no Kyojin follows Eren, along with his adopted sister Mikasa Ackerman and his childhood friend Armin Arlert, as they join the brutal war against the titans and race to discover a way of defeating them before the last walls are breached.

6. Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magica (2011)

Madoka Kaname and Sayaka Miki are regular middle school girls with regular lives, but all that changes when they encounter Kyuubey, a cat-like magical familiar, and Homura Akemi, the new transfer student.

Kyuubey offers them a proposition: he will grant any one of their wishes and in exchange, they will each become a magical girl, gaining enough power to fulfill their dreams. However, Homura Akemi, a magical girl herself, urges them not to accept the offer, stating that everything is not what it seems.

A story of hope, despair, and friendship, Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magica deals with the difficulties of being a magical girl and the price one has to pay to make a dream come true.

7. Hunter X Hunter (2011)

Hunter x Hunter is set in a world where Hunters exist to perform all manner of dangerous tasks like capturing criminals and bravely searching for lost treasures in uncharted territories. Twelve-year-old Gon Freecss is determined to become the best Hunter possible in hopes of finding his father, who was a Hunter himself and had long ago abandoned his young son. However, Gon soon realizes the path to achieving his goals is far more challenging than he could have ever imagined.

Along the way to becoming an official Hunter, Gon befriends the lively doctor-in-training Leorio, vengeful Kurapika, and rebellious ex-assassin Killua. To attain their own goals and desires, together the four of them take the Hunter Exam, notorious for its low success rate and high probability of death. Throughout their journey, Gon and his friends embark on an adventure that puts them through many hardships and struggles. They will meet a plethora of monsters, creatures, and characters—all while learning what being a Hunter truly means.

8. Ranma ½ (1989)

Ranma Saotome is a top-class martial artist and prodigy at the Saotome “Anything-Goes” school of martial arts. While training in China, he and his father meet a terrible fate when they accidentally fall into a cursed spring. Now, Ranma is cursed to turn into a girl when splashed with cold water, and only hot water can turn him back into a boy.

Things are only complicated further when Ranma discovers that his father has arranged for him to marry one of Soun Tendo’s three daughters in order to secure the future of the Tendo dojo. Though Soun learns of Ranma’s predicament, he is still determined to go ahead with the engagement, and chooses his youngest daughter Akane, who happens to be a skilled martial artist herself and is notorious for hating men.

Ranma ½ follows the hilarious adventures of Ranma and Akane as they encounter various opponents, meet new love interests, and find different ways to make each other angry, all while their engagement hangs over their head.

9. Love Live! School Idol Project (2013)

Otonokizaka High School is in a crisis! With the number of enrolling students dropping lower and lower every year, the school is set to shut down after its current first years graduate. However, second year Honoka Kousaka refuses to let it go without a fight. Searching for a solution, she comes across popular school idol group A-RISE and sets out to create a school idol group of her own. With the help of her childhood friends Umi Sonoda and Kotori Minami, Honoka forms μ’s (pronounced “muse”) to boost awareness and popularity of her school.

Unfortunately, it’s all easier said than done. Student council president Eri Ayase vehemently opposes the establishment of a school idol group and will do anything in her power to prevent its creation. Moreover, Honoka and her friends have trouble attracting any additional members. But the Love Live, a competition to determine the best and most beloved school idol groups in Japan, can help them gain the attention they desperately need. With the contest fast approaching, Honoka must act quickly and diligently to try and bring together a school idol group and win the Love Live in order to save Otonokizaka High School.

10. Demon Slayer (2019)

Ever since the death of his father, the burden of supporting the family has fallen upon Tanjirou Kamado’s shoulders. Though living impoverished on a remote mountain, the Kamado family are able to enjoy a relatively peaceful and happy life. One day, Tanjirou decides to go down to the local village to make a little money selling charcoal. On his way back, night falls, forcing Tanjirou to take shelter in the house of a strange man, who warns him of the existence of flesh-eating demons that lurk in the woods at night.

When he finally arrives back home the next day, he is met with a horrifying sight—his whole family has been slaughtered. Worse still, the sole survivor is his sister Nezuko, who has been turned into a bloodthirsty demon. Consumed by rage and hatred, Tanjirou swears to avenge his family and stay by his only remaining sibling. Alongside the mysterious group calling themselves the Demon Slayer Corps, Tanjirou will do whatever it takes to slay the demons and protect the remnants of his beloved sister’s humanity.

I hope you find something you like here and will check some of my faves out!! ❤️ Let me know if you do and what you think!!! x

[rufamapo]

This is the manhwa version. This doesnt belong to me. I just saw it on mangadex comments. These are huge spoilers guys. BE CAREFUL

JULY FOUND BY CHANCE ENDING SPOILER

SQUID FAIRY:

Continuing from Chapter 22, Squid Fairy and the lady will continue to spend time together and eventually fall in love. However, a princess, the character who is squid fairy's love interest, will appear. He will then spend more and more time with the princess, and less with the lady. Of course, this is against his will, but since its a set role in heads, he can't do as he pleases. The lady will in turn start to get jealous and doubt squid's feelings. She will tell him to stop meeting and interacting with the princess, but of course Squid can't do that even if he wants to because of his role. Then squid and lady will start to grow apart. Then one day, in a fighting scene in tails, squid slashes an assassin, but it turns out this assassin is the lady. While holding her in his arms, the lady dies. Then in the next scene, the lady is seen alive, but can't seem to remember squid.

And that is how squid found out that characters who dies in tails loses their self awareness. That is also why he keeps insisting that nothing will change even if they try.

Squid Also tells Danoh during their conversation that after the comic they're in ends, they'll end up in a dark world, where they'll remain until they are pulled out into another comic again.

___________________________________

BAEKYUNG:

Wonder why Baekyung is super rude af to Danoh? Well that's because Danoh is similar to Baekyung's mom, a terminally ill patient.

When he was a kid, his mom died due to illness, and during that time, he felt a great deal of pain and loneliness(his dad ain't that great of a support either). Now, not wanting to experience the same pain again, he closed off his heart towards Danoh, and used rudeness as a self defense so he won't develop any feelings for her.

Welp, but in the end, he ended up liking her even more, even in the tails where he is free from his role.

___________________________________

DOHWA:

Dohwa has the heaviest secret in the entire comic, and it's not even his fault.

During their childhood years, Juda got kidnapped and tortured when her and Dohwa were out playing in the snow. Later, Dohwa found out that she only got kidnapped because the kidnapper thought she was a child of the Lee(dohwa's family) family.

In the past, Dohwa's father operated on Juda's mom, but due to an accident during the surgery, her mother died. Not wanting to accept responsibility, Dohwa's father hid this fact, and made another doctor take blame for the medical malpractice.

Remember in the earlier chapters, Juda's grandmother's death? Welp she was murdered by none other than Dohwa's Dad. Suspicious of her daugther's(Juda's mom) death, grandma investigated around and found out the truth. To silence the grandma, Dohwa's dad killed her on purpose during her surgery, but made it looked like she died in the middle of the surgery due to, uh, natural reason.

Our dear Dohwa, after finding out all these things, couldn't bear the guilt anymore, and commited suicide in tails, resulting in him losing his self awareness.

[P.S. Dohwa's brother(Danoh's doctor) was also an accomplice in Juda's grandma's death.]

__________________________________

HARU:

Following from chapter 22, Haru isn't responding to Danoh when she calls him "Haruyah!" because he lost his self awareness.

How he lost it? This is why:

Danoh is supposed to get a heart surgery, but because she waited for Baekyung, who failed to show up due to a road accident, her surgery got delayed and unsuccessful. To change this, Haru took Baekyung's place and was the one who got in the accident instead, so that Baekyung can arrive on time and the surgery will be a success. This resulted in Haru getting killed, which made him lose his self awareness.

When Danoh learns of this, she will, as she did back then, make Haru remember. She will continuously look for Haru, greet him, and introduce herself every time. During this time, a very touching scene will happen. Remember that infirmary band aid scene in the previous chapters? Welp, its gonna happen again. Like before, Haru will place a band-aid on Danoh's knees and will say the same words he did as before.

_________________________________

NEAR THE ENDING:

After our character's find out all about the 'killing your self awarenes" and "dark world" fiasco, soon they start making their choices one by one. Well we already know Dohwa's choice... *sobs*

As for Danoh, she chooses to keep her awareness and remember everything, her reasoning being that she's the only one that remembers everything about her and Haru(now that Haru lost his awareness), and she wants to keep these memories alive. Later on, Haru will get his self awareness back thanks to Danoh's great efforts, and he will also choose to keep his self awareness together with Danoh.

Baekyung also makes his decision, and chooses to remember and keep his awareness despite knowing that Danoh chose Haru. When he was making his decision, he was having a convo with squid fairy. I don't remember much of their conversation, but I do remember squid saying something like self awareness is a "curse they must bear(aka a price to pay for hurting the ones they love)"

_____________________________________

ENDING:

Remember Danoh's surgery during the road accident? Welp it still failed despite Haru's effort. And so, this time, after seeing yet another storyboard, Danoh knew it was gonna be her last.

Danoh wakes up in an ambulance, but before it takes her to the hospital, she gets out and makes a run to find Haru. However, her feet are moving against her will and are going in a different direction, which is towards Baekyung. As she and Baekyung sits on the bench with the snow falling, her last line appears, however she puts her hand on her mouth and willfully stops herself from saying her last line, saying to Baekyung "All I can do now is wait(for Haru to come)." Alas Haru comes, and they exchange their final thank yous and goodbyes, with Haru showing a happy and cheerful face to a dying Danoh. And then beeep Danoh dies. Not long after Haru is trembling and crying. Turns out he kept his compose and didn't dare to show sadness to Danoh so that her last moments of him that she'll remember is a happy one.

After Danoh died, she stayed in the dark world for awhile, then she woke up into a new comic world.

__________________________________

DANOH:

Danoh is actually the main character of a work the creators made before their debut. Her character is a time traveler that can:

•time travel back and forth between past and present

•can see the future

•has the power to change the future

So that is how she was able to change and delay her death(the creators wanted her to die a long long long time ago, but for some reason, she keeps living). Also, that's why she was able to change minor things in the comic(like the curry incident, her facial expressions, etc.) despite Fairy squid saying she can't.

_____________________________________

EPILOGUE:

At the epilogue, the creators are seen working on two new comics. One, a modern day highschool drama and one a historical drama. The modern drama has Danoh in it while the historical one has Haru in it.

Then the creators are shown chatting, talking about how the two comics are going to be merged into one.

Then after, Danoh is shown to have time traveled to a kind of like Joseon era period, where there......

SHE MEETS HARU!!!!!

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Then at the end, it showed both of them leaning to each other side by side, while looking at the sunset.

😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

[cosmiciaria]

In defense of Final Fantasy XIII-2 (long post - mild spoilers ahead!)

Disclaimer: Sorry for the pics bad quality. I don't own a ps3, my friend lent me one, and I don't really know how to take screenshots, so I did my best to make my photos look visible.  Just don't mind them much.

SO, I'll start by saying that this game IS BAD and it's part of a badly executed and hated trilogy. To be honest, I don't appreciate Final Fantasy XIII much: the first time I played it I was blinded by (light – sorry pun) the visuals and the crystals and everything was shining and whatever. But then I replayed it, and started seeing all the things people were complaining about. As I skipped some scenes to make my second playthrough smoother and faster, I noticed one thing: I was bored. I wasn't enjoying the gameplay, I didn't understand the story in its entirety even if it was my second time playing it. It was one of the first videogames I played in English (hello from Argentina) so I thought that maybe my limitations with the language were dampening my experience, but I asked a friend about the plot and she told me she didn't understand it either.

At any rate, I only played FFXIII because I wanted to play FFXIII-2. I didn't know why, or what, but something in the sequel (cof cof Noel cof) gave me the urge to try and see it for myself. Like I mentioned before, I don't own a ps3, so I had to wait until in 2015 they released the PC ports. I was so happy with this, that I decided to complete the game 100% and see everything it had to offer.

And it has so much to offer! Yes, I won't deny it, the plot is all over the place, and this is where the trilogy goes to hell with its story. But, let's just say we are all aboard the suspension of disbelief train – if we do it, we'll find there's a great story behind all the time gates.

What I enjoyed the most about this sequel was the characters. In XIII I spent HOURS complaining about how annoying everyone was (except for Fang, she's perfect). I couldn't relate to or stand anyone: Lightning became obnoxious with her monotone, Hope was a crybaby with a pretentious revenge plot that didn't work out well, Sahz is just kinda there not contributing anything to the plot, Vanille just has that oh-please-kill-me squeaky voice and Snow is… I hate Snow. I just hate him. The little fondness I have for him stems from my love for Troy Baker's performances, but oh my Etro, Snow is just like a shonen hero in the body of a 21-year-old man. It's just not right, it defies the laws of anime and videogames. Please eradicate him. I hate Square Enix for creating a character like him and forcing me to play as him and use him as a Sentinel because he's just that good in that role, damn him!

But in FFXIII-2? Suddenly, I found myself rooting for Noel and Serah. We get to learn about Noel's backstory, his sad present, his depressing lifestyle. The inexorability of his tale, the imminence of his decaying world. And he becomes such an endearing partner! He's always there to catch Serah if she falls, he's always asking her if she's feeling well. He's proficient, he's efficient, and he's not complaining about stupid stuff. He even doesn't want to talk about his past because he doesn't want to bother Serah – PLEASE Hope just learn something from this man!

And what about Serah? She's not the best character, I give it to you, but she goes from damsel in distress to a badass time traveler in a blink of an eye, and I can certainly get behind that! She's selfless, she faces everything head on, even though she's scared. Her journey began with the search of her sister, but slowly she found herself surrounded by things she couldn't quite comprehend, only to learn that she was more entangled with the fate of the world than she'd anticipated.

And if you do some optional stuff, you can learn things about Mog as well – not only his features are useful (and funny), but he's also the comic relief, adding extra spice to some of the conversations. His exaggerated expressions and his cute voice make up for a good companion.

And I cannot NOT mention Caius (Liam O'Brien I stan). Say whatever about him, but I love his characterization. He's well made. Yes, he wants the same as countless others villains from the FF franchise, but this time I can understand his motives. I feel pity for him. I want to help him. He's cursed beyond redemption. And he's got the best theme song ever.

I can understand these characters. The game spends enough time on everyone so we can learn to care for them, they show us how their relationship nurtures, their dynamics. And I care! This is something XIII-2 made right and XIII did not: I don't care about Lightning, or Hope, or Snow, but I do care that Noel and Serah succeed in their task. I don't care about Barthandelus or the Pulse Fal'Cie, but I do care about Caius getting what he wants. XIII had so many characters but spent too little time in developing (properly, at least) their strengths and weaknesses, but most of all, their relationships. The only real relationship that feels genuine is the one between Fang and Vanille, but that's because they know each other from before the events of the game; whereas the rest of the team feels like… badly placed pieces of puzzle trying to fit.

I know you're gonna say, hey, other FF put together characters that had nothing to do and it worked (yeah, I can mention FFXII and to a certain extent, because Penelo and Vaan were just there for the lulz I guess). In XIII it just didn't work for me: I couldn't root for any of them, and when the game was finished, I was kinda relieved.

That doesn't happen in XIII-2. Maybe they got it, maybe it was out of luck, I don't know, but characters here are better fleshed out, and we can learn to care and root for them, so we want to see it through to the end by their side.

That's just one thing that XIII-2 did better.

Gameplay was enhanced: now it's faster, more strategic, it doesn't bullshit you like when the leader died in XIII. I'm not going to delve deeper into the Pokémon thing, but yes, you can catch them all, and it adds a lot to the stakes because there's one more thing to gain besides the battle: the monster you're fighting. The game added so many features, it blows me away: the time travelling, opening new paths, closing some; the fragments, which give you experience points and insights in some of the lore; the fragment skills, additional things you can earn or do if certain requirements are met; the f*cking casino that has chocobo races, something that was lacking in the previous game; you can add ADORNMENTS to the monsters you tame to get the ultimate fashion experience. I don't know, there's so much to do, too many timelines to visit. There are too many sidequests, but all of them are linked to the main plot, so you feel like you're still learning things from the main story. Yes, I know, they reuse the same map over and over (Yaschas Massif and Oerba, I'm looking at you), but they compensate with some brand new maps, like Academia 4XX AF which must be my favorite location, so full of life and futuristic style, and the Archylte Steppe, with its weather changing feature.

Sometimes the lack of gameplay slaps you in the face but in the good sense, for instance in Academia 400 AF, where you have a forced battle every two seconds. The sense of urgency and danger is well conveyed through the use of random encounters with enemies. Or when you visit the Void Beyond with Serah, that you're alone, and you have a ghastly Mog following you around, with some of his features blocked. They used everything they had at their disposal, and they used it well. Gone are the days with the endless hallway that we complained so much about in XIII (as if FFX wasn't linear as hell too, but we don't complain about that one – don't dare because it's my favorite FF I warn you): now you can choose how to play, when to play, face that monster or go for an alternative ending. They listened to our whining and gave us this sequel, yes, that nobody asked for, but yet, they did.

There's a huge world-building surrounding all the time travelling thing: in the future, time travel becomes something of an everyday topic, so when you walk around in Academia 4XX you can hear kids playing "let's go and destroy those evil paradox monsters". They built a world around the idea that you can time travel, and that's how Hope gets to live and see every era, monitoring his work that will take centuries to be fulfilled. This is how we should take the time travel in this game, not as doomsday-serious as in Terminator or Back to the Future, but with a more light-hearted approach. I think that's what they tried to do, and it works well that way.

However light-hearted this game tries to be, it has some sad and depressing bits, mostly around Noel and his way of life. Whenever his theme song kicks-in, you can understand all his character without a word. And that takes me to another thing this game excels at: soundtrack. Now, I won't say it's better than XIII, because the first game has some awesome music as well, but I'll be damned if I don't give enough credit to this game's songs. Yeul's Theme, Noel's Theme, Wishes – you learn everything of these characters by just listening to these beautiful vocals. And I also love that the music took risks, like the Crazy Chocobo theme – I swear that thing is both the best and worst thing out of this game.

Confession time: I can't stop shipping Serah and Noel. I'm just so angry that Snow exists because it forbids this ship in the canon. I have one major complain about it, though: I can't help but notice that both Caius and Noel are infatuated by a fifteen-year-old. I can't discern how much of it is "loyalty beyond boundaries" or "I love her, I truly love her, like I'm in love with her" kind of love, but still, it bugs me a bit. Caius and Yeul's relationship feels more natural, given that he's her guardian, and he acts upon this role the whole game, until the end, where Noel clearly states that Yeul always came back because she wanted to stay by Caius's side. So it leaves me wondering. And Lightning Returns pretty much confirmed to us that Noel was in love with Yeul, which of COURSE I don't LIKE at ALL but I'll roll with it. I'm just glad that we got XIII-2 ending where Jason Marsden's voice breaks when he yells Serah's name. They gave me enough content for a thousand fics. Let's pretend that Noel's attitude in LR doesn't happen, ok?

You can hate this game. I can't blame you for it. Nobody wanted it, it doesn't connect well to its predecessor unless you read two novellas, and it forcefully leads us to Lightning Returns where, I can safely say, the plot goes to hell, almost literally. But this game exists, and it doesn't deserve half the hate it receives. If you play it it's because you enjoyed XIII (I highly doubt that you'll make yourself go through this suffering if you didn't like the first one – if you do, I just don't know why you hate yourself so much), and if you did, there's no way you're not going to see all the good things they added in this one. Enjoy it for what it is, and not for what it's not, or for what it could've been.

I sometimes wonder what could've happened if this game didn't have "Final Fantasy" on its cover. Because the time travel is intelligent and fun to play, the world-building around the Farseers and this bleak future is interesting and well made – the problem with this game is that it's a Final Fantasy and that it's a sequel to an already quite finished story. It feels like they forced a sequel, and maybe they did. But I, for once, am glad they did.

[hanmajoerin]

This is not a drill, I repeat this is not a drill 🚨!

Chapter six of 1095 Days Without You, “Thirty-Two Days Without You”, has been published on Fanfiction.net and AO3 (and if links to websites aren’t your thing, the chapter is posted below for your viewing).

If you haven’t read 1095 Days Without You yet, there is no time like the present to start. The fic is a drabble series highlighting moments during the three year separation period where Kagome realizes that a world without InuYasha isn’t one she can call home. 

Chapter Six: Thirty-Two Days Without You

“Hey, Kagome!” InuYasha barked from the opposite end of the hallway and Kagome’s shoulders slumped, her brand new blue blazer too stiff to imitate the motion. It was hard to believe that she discovered the correct wish, purified the Sacred Jewel, and returned through the well with InuYasha over a month ago. Life certainly changed for her—for all of their friends—and Kagome was happy to volunteer her drastic transformation from middle schooler fretting over an evil half-demon and high school entrance exams to a high schooler predicting her friend’s next comment with almost psychic accuracy. ‘InuYasha’s picked you up for the third time this week; things are so serious,’ Kagome thought to herself as Ayumi tucked a small chuckle behind the back of her hand.

“This is the third time this week,” Ayumi said, that small laugh peeking out from between her fingers. Kagome groaned and, honestly, she didn’t care if InuYasha heard it. If he did, the sheen in his amber eyes hardly showed it as he stopped in front of the two school girls. Ayumi landed a playful jab to Kagome’s arm, turning her focus to the half-demon. “I was just about to tell Kagome that you picking her up is so sweet.”

In typical InuYasha fashion, InuYasha turned his nose to the ceiling. “Well, I wouldn’t have to come ‘n get her if she didn’t take so damn long to leave,” he grumbled, a contradictory haze of pink spreading across the bridge of his nose.

Kagome rolled her eyes.“Okay, okay—let’s just go home already,” she carped, placing her hands against his back and pushing him down the hallway. InuYasha’s feet scrambled to keep up with the motion but the longer the three congregated, the more likely it was for whispers of the temperamental delinquent boy—not student—to finally reach her teachers. It wasn’t that Kagome was ashamed to be seen with InuYasha. As a matter of fact, the truth was far from it. These new days of peace were overflowing with late-night kisses, confessions, touches, and conversations. Yes, Kagome was confident that if her life changed in any other way, it would be a nightmare.

Still, InuYasha had a lot of learning to do when it came to the customs of the Modern Era. The teachers of this school would never know he was a half-demon from the past. And that’s why they'd forbid him from entering the building if they thought he was just a boy. Kagome loved InuYasha, but even the thought of reasoning with him on the matter gave her a headache.

Kagome turned her head back to Ayumi. “Meet you at the train station tomorrow?”

-X-

The overall frigid A/C in Seiyu Supermarket had nothing on the teeth-chattering Arctic tundra that its frozen meat and seafood section omitted. Kagome was relieved that she and InuYasha managed to come out on the other side after thirty bone-chilling seconds.

“Where’s the ramen, Kagome?” InuYasha asked instantly, nearly leaping in the air as he turned around to face her. Excitement exuberated from the tips of his white fuzzy ears all the way his pointed toes. Clearly, the extra cold atmosphere hadn’t affected him. Must be a half-demon perk, and those billowing pants.

Instead of answering her boyfriend, Kagome found herself drawn to the easygoing smirk he sported. Without Naraku hovering over him, InuYasha’s shoulders seemed lighter; his smiles more genuine. He looked at her with these wide, golden eyes that couldn’t possibly know hardship.

The schoolgirl turned priestess hoped these grocery store trips Mama made them take would be a part of their future forever.

Even though a forever with InuYasha was a wonderful fantasy to build in her mind, the present unfolded before them both and there was ramen waiting. Kagome shook her head and took InuYasha’s hand, leading the way. InuYasha boldly tangled his fingers between hers, all while continuing to gape at their surroundings. “How does your world have so much food?”

“Distributors?” Kagome answered, albeit not confidently.

InuYasha plunged his focus back down to her eye level. “Dis—what?”

Kagome waved him off, pointing to several long, packed shelves. “Well, never mind that InuYasha, look: ramen!”

Kagome’s world enchanted InuYasha; the unadulterated merriment and unabashed exploration he’d taken to shown while he vigorously inspected ramen flavors. It reminded her about his habit of wandering through the halls of Yosono High. She had to at least try getting him to stop. While she pondered the best way to approach the topic, she realized that it felt like hours since they left school which was strange. It had only been minutes. She couldn’t explain it, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t attempt asking InuYasha to change their after school meeting place.

“You know you could wait outside for me,” Kagome started.

Without missing a beat or tearing his attention away from scanning for the right flavor, InuYasha simply stated, “If I wait outside, you’ll just get distracted.”

“That’s not true! You’re going to get me in trouble,” Kagome huffed.

“Haven’t yet.”

Like a chest puffed out in pride, Kagome’s bottom lip protruded. Only she wanted to draw InuYasha’s focus to it so he could see her absolutely pouting.

A light of recognition sparked in his eyes and for a split second, Kagome believed he had a tidbit to add to their conversation. Of course, she ended up watching InuYasha grab four cups of ramen—two in each hand—from seemingly opposite ends of the shelves instead.

“InuYasha,” Kagome whined.

“Yes?” He asked, lowering all of the styrofoam cups into their already full green basket.

Maybe it was the way he had answered her with such gentle sincerity or maybe it was because she missed him so much that waltzing into a potential argument—Wait. She missed InuYasha. The idea sent her reeling backward.

“I—I, I miss you, InuYasha,” she stuttered, brows furrowing together. “How is it possible that I miss you when we’ve spent every single day together since we defeated Naraku and the Sacred Jewel?”

“The Sacred Jewel?” InuYasha asked, cocking his head to the side, appearing way too cool. How was he this calm? Couldn’t he hear how quickly her heart was beating—it shook her veins with absolute force. That was when Kagome realized it.

“The Sacred Jewel.”

With a resounding beat, her best friend and their entire lives faded into infinite darkness.

“Sacred Jewel!” Kagome shouted, eyes searching for a familiar sight. Soon thereafter, as if calling out its name was the same as summoning it, the Jewel appeared with the arrow she shot a few moments before Naraku passed. “Why did you bring me here?”

“You really thought that you could defeat me?”

“But InuYasha and I—”

“InuYasha was never here,” the Jewel cut her off. The choir of demons speaking within continued, nearly paralyzing the priestess.“He’s never coming.”

What the jewel was claiming didn’t make sense. Kagome swore she already lived through this experience. Despite all of the odds, InuYasha rescued her and she went home. They went home. She already endured this awful limbo, she’d endured the taunting. She spent three days alone. “No, that can’t be true!” If he needed to, InuYasha would find a way to her once more because the girl who overcame time and the boy who was just overcome were much larger than any jewel.

“Don’t you understand? This is where you’re meant to be,” The Sacred Jewel insisted and it paused, maybe anticipating a gasp from Kagome. She remained silent. “Well, we showed you a vision of what your life could be...”

“What are you talking about?” Kagome asked and it was then that she caught sight of retired green and white fabric. ‘No way...’

“Would you like to return to the world you saw?” Kagome’s body erupted into a cold sweat, and as she clutched her fists, she realized her bow was gone. There was nothing here. “All you have to do is wish for it and you can return.”

“InuYasha!” Kagome wailed. InuYasha and her life together hadn’t been an illusion. There was no way the Sacred Jewel showed her another vision. If it was trying to get Kagome to make a wish, she’d refuse. Especially if wishing meant she’d lose InuYasha.

“InuYasha!” The high schooler called out again without any response. The Sacred Jewel stopped taunting her. “What have you done?” She asked, voice shaking from nerves. No answer. Kagome’s breath quickened. This wasn’t right. There was no way that she was still trapped.

“InuYasha!” She screamed, tears pooling at the corner of her eyes. She missed him so much.

The jewel faded into black but Kagome hadn’t noticed. The only thing that mattered was finding a spec of red, a dash of stark white hair, a peek of amber eyes that glowed. The darkness was consuming her as she waited for InuYasha. Just the sound of his voice would put her at ease. She just needed to talk to InuYasha. If only she could hear him. “InuYasha...” Her tears seared her cheeks and without warning, an even sharper pain struck her in the middle of her back. It sent straight into the light.

“InuYasha!” Kagome exclaimed, gripping the sides of her desk and throwing her body into an unsteady standing position.

The cringing sound of 32 chairs screeched against the floor as 33 pairs of eyes, including Ms. Suzuki’s, faced Kagome. The high schooler’s breathing slowed, but her heartbeat skyrocketed. “Higurashi,” Ms. Suzuki began, rearranging her glasses so they laid higher on the bridge of her nose.“Hallway—now.”

“Yes ma’am,” Kagome rushed to say, cheeks turning the same shade of red as the Robe of the Fire Rat.

[pengiesama]

Home for the Holidays (Fic, TOZ, Sorey/Mikleo)

Title: Home for the Holidays Series: Tales of Zestiria Pairing: Sorey/Mikleo

Summary: It's Shepherdsmas Eve, and Sorey and Mikleo are preparing to host dinner at their place. Then Maotelus rips a hole in reality and accidentally resurrects their dead biological family as seraphim.

Meeting the in-laws for the first time is always awkward.

Part of the Sormik Advent Calendar 2019, for the “12 Days of Christmas"/"12 Pains of Christmas” prompt “Meeting the In-Laws”.

@sormikadventcalendar / sormikadvent (Twitter)

Link: AO3

Read on Tumblr!

“Hi,” Maotelus said, popping his head out of the chimney and into the fireplace.

Mikleo screamed, dropping the tray of sweets and hot chocolate he was carrying with a loud crash.

“Merry Shepherdsmas Eve,” Maotelus continued, undeterred. “Sorry to drop in unannounced, but got a quick question for you. I kinda did something that might’ve torn a rift in the Earthpulse and I need someone to keep an eye on a few things while I figure things out down there before it eats reality. And ruins Shepherdsmas.”

“Wh—wh—” Mikleo sputtered, trying to get a handle on the situation he was being presented.

“Mikleo? I heard a crash, are you okay?” Sorey poked his head into the room. “Mao? When did you get here?”

“Sorey!” Maotelus greeted warmly. The red pom-pom hat he was wearing had caught fire while he dangled upside-down over the fireplace. “Merry Shepherdsmas Eve. Listen, I need you two to babysit some new seraphim that popped out of a teensy tiny little fissure in the Earthpulse that I caused while I was trying to break someone out of Hell Prison.”

“Oh,” Sorey said. “Um. That sounds fine?”

Mikleo made a strangled quacking noise, like a furious, confused duck. Sorey gently reached out and hugged him around the shoulders, stroking his long hair back from his face.

“It’ll be fine, Mikleo, it’s just hosting some guests! That’s what Shepherdsmas is all about, right?”

“Shepherdsmas was originally observed as a religious holiday in the Asgard era and was intended by the human religious authorities as an extremely solemn and boring occasion to reflect upon the accomplishments and sacrifices of past Shepherds,” Mikleo said flatly. “And today it is mostly about buying presents.”

“Sounds like someone needs to learn about the true meaning of Shepherdsmas,” Maotelus commented.

Mikleo sounded like he was about to explode. “EVERY YEAR! EVERY YEAR YOU SAY THAT AND EVERY YEAR WE’RE CLEANING UP THE MESS FOR DAYS AFTER—”

The air shimmered with iridescent energy, and the earth rumbled ominously.

“Okay I gotta go now have fun with your guests and by the way they’re the seraphic reincarnations of your biological human families be back soon!”

Maotelus blew out the fire in the fireplace with a puff of breath, darted up the chimney, and stuffed a big red bag down after him. The red bag landed in the fireplace, and wriggled this way and that, as if stuffed full of living creatures.

…like the seraphic reincarnations of their former human families.

The bag tumbled over, and the tie at the top was finally yanked open from the inside.

There were two women; one, Muse, as Mikleo dimly remembered her from that tiny, lonely room in the Mabinogio Ruins so many centuries ago. Her hair had turned a shining pearl white, with green tips. The other woman, with white-red hair, was unfamiliar, but had Sorey’s wide green eyes, and a distinctive resemblance besides. Selene, he remembered her name, and her name alone. To his shame, he knew nothing else about the woman…but the way she clung to Muse’s arm, seeking comfort, was a start.

The other bag inhabitants were…

…not quite the kind of seraphim they had expected.

“Get that ratty tail of yours out of my face!” snapped a bluish-purple Normin.

He shoved another Normin away from him, who fell to the floor with a sound resembling a squeaky toy. This Normin had a small lion’s tail, and a mane that caused his beret to not fit quite right. The lionesque Normin flailed furiously, like an upended turtle.

“Another life! Another life and another chance to take my revenge on you and this miserable world!” snarled the lionesque Normin.

The bluish-purple Normin spotted a fireplace poker, and immediately went for it. Muse yelled in dismay and picked him up before he could grab it.

“Um…” Sorey cleared his throat. “Merry Shepherdsmas?”

Their guests startled, only seeming to just realize they were in someone else’s house, and being watched. Muse’s gaze fell on Sorey first, then Mikleo. Her eyes were clear, unclouded, focused; not like their sightless gaze from their last meeting. She stared at him; stared right into those eyes that matched her own.

It was a long moment before Mikleo could find the words to speak.

“Hello,” Mikleo said quietly. “I don’t know what Maotelus told you, if anything. But, you’re seraphim. This is a land called Glenwood. Do you remember anything from before he plucked you from the Earthpulse?”

“Mikleo?” Muse asked, her voice trembling. Tears welled in her eyes. “A-are you my Mikleo?”

It was odd, being hugged so tightly and loved so desperately by someone he didn’t know at all.

 --

 “Michael,” Lailah said sternly. “Stop fighting with your tablemates. It’s Shepherdsmas and we must put past squabbles behind us.”

“I am one of the Shepherds in that Shepherdsmas,” Michael replied. “And that means that I can squabble as I choose to.”

Everyone was trying very hard to enjoy their annual Shepherdsmas dinner. Michael and Heldalf – for it was indeed they who had reincarnated into Normin forms – were strapped into makeshift baby highchairs and were currently locked in a ceaseless battle of wills. This took the form of Michael throwing his vegetables at Heldalf and Heldalf making grand and impotent threats as he was steadily coated in mashed potatoes.

Mikleo didn’t know why this kind of thing always happened when it was his and Sorey’s turn to host dinner at their place.

“I shall bring darkness down upon this world! Malevolence to smother out suffering!” Heldalf yowled, thrashing in place in his highchair.

“I shall bring peas upon your head,” Edna replied, scattering a handful of peas on top of the mashed potatoes covering him. “Man, Meebo, your uncle is way cooler than you. This is the best Shepherdsmas ever.”

“Michael, please,” Muse pleaded. “Mikleo, he’s not usually – well, no, he is usually like this, but…”

“It’s fine,” Mikleo assured her.

And honestly, it was; Mikleo was used to the house being a mess after these dinners. And beyond that, he didn’t have strong feelings about his uncle, even knowing his…contributions to what happened during that time. It was just so long ago, and he didn’t remember him at all. Or anything, from back then. One of the perks of living such a long life was the ability to have all such things lost to the mists of time.

But unfortunately, it would take some time for these new recruits to adapt. Surely it would’ve been more merciful for Maotelus to keep their memories from back then locked away.

For all Mikleo’s awkwardness with his biological mother, it hardly compared to the palpable awkwardness between Sorey and Selene.

“…”

“…”

“…good chicken,” Selene commented, poking the meat on her plate.

“Yeah,” Sorey replied. “It’s, um. Really good.”

“…”

“…”

“…”

“…I put some spices on it.”

“A-ah. Yeah.”

“…”

“…”

Mikleo couldn’t really blame Selene for being disoriented. Surprise, you’re alive again, it’s a thousand years in the future, and that premature baby you thought was probably going to die right after you died is actually alive and well and also saved the world a while back and is now an immortal being of the elements. He could deal with her reaction to the information a lot more easily than he could Muse’s – Selene reacted to these things like Sorey did, after all; by going quiet and inward to process. Mikleo could handle that. He would give them space and hover on the sidelines to fret. But Muse was hovering, herself, and fretting a whole lot, and was still clearly eaten up by guilt and trying way too hard to make things okay when things weren’t un-okay in the first place and he’d just really like some space. Every time she tried to reach out and awkwardly touch his arm he’d flinch away from the unfamiliar contact and she was clearly taking that as some sort of sign that he hated her. Mikleo understood for the first time in his life why humans disliked family gatherings so much. He wanted to set a fire on the table, grab Sorey by the wrist, and escape off into the winter night.

“So…” Zaveid said, bravely steaming in to steer the conversation. “Wind and fire, huh? I got some know-how about that kinda magic, if you ladies need a teacher…”

The table went dead silent again. After a few moments, a handful of mashed potatoes hit Zaveid square in the nose.

“Who keeps giving him more potatoes!?” Muse outburst, somewhat hysterical.

“That’d be me,” Edna said, holding out the serving bowl of mashed potatoes to Michael so he could refill his plate with ammo.

“Everyone,” Lailah announced, rising to her feet. “On this day, this Shepherdsmas, we are here together as a family, to come together and celebrate togetherness…”

“Together and stuff,” Michael said under his breath. Edna snickered.

“MFF,” said Heldalf, under a mountain of muck.

“And so,” Lailah went on. “We should give thanks and reflect upon the meaning of the season…”

“Um,” Selene quietly interrupted. “I’ve been meaning to ask…Shepherdsmas. That’s a…thing now?”

“Oh, yes indeed,” Lailah said. “Please don’t hesitate to ask things, dear, I’m sure you have questions.”

Selene gave an awkward smile, and Mikleo felt his heart warm at how the expression so resembled Sorey.

“T-thanks. Back…back then, I guess, I thought it was just some thing the Shrinechurch made up to let them trot out a fake Shepherd and scam donations out of people…”

“Well,” Sorey began. “Historical sources indicate that was definitely the case for the holiday during several periods. But when resonance started to improve and humanity began to establish stronger ties with the seraphim again, it started to gradually change form, eventually becoming the gift-giving exchange it represents today…”

Sorey was in his element, infodumping on history, and when Sorey was comfortable, Mikleo was comfortable. Selene began to relax in turn – Sorey’s good moods were truly contagious – and with Selene and Mikleo soothed, Muse herself settled as well. Even Michael’s potato assault began to peter off in the face of Sorey’s continued lecture.

They could count another Shepherdsmas as saved.

 --

 Everyone else was asleep for the night, sequestered in guest rooms, and Mikleo and Sorey finally had some time to themselves.

Mikleo sighed deeply, allowing himself to decompress to the rhythm of Sorey’s heartbeat under his ear, and the feeling of his fingers in his hair.

“It’s always a surprise with Shepherdsmas, isn’t it?” Sorey said.

Mikleo grunted. “At least when your friend gets it in his head to mess around in the Earthpulse. Or get drunk. Or both.”

Sorey laughed, and Mikleo’s mood couldn’t stay sour for long at the sound of it.

“I guess. But the weather tonight is so cozy, and everyone’s asleep now, so…”

Mikleo could guess at what he was implying. He closed his eyes, leaning in, pressing against Sorey’s mouth with his own…

A flash of light filled the room, and in an instant, there was a cat-sized white dragon sitting in the branches of their Shepherdsmas tree; tangled in the lights.

“Okay, now that’s cleared up,” Maotelus said. “A little more help fell out of the rift in space-time. It’s a Shepherdsmas miracle.”

“Hello boys,” Zenrus said warmly. “Good to see you again.”

Sorey and Mikleo startled, and leapt from their spot on the couch to greet him.

“Gramps!”

“By the way, I’ll be doing this again sometime,” Maotelus said. “Hell Prison ain’t easy to jailbreak. I’ll try to grab your two squires next time though – they ran away from me when they saw me for some reason.”

“Were you a giant dragon at the time?” asked Sorey.

“I was a giant dragon at the time,” Maotelus confirmed. “And breathing fire.”

“Hmm,” Sorey said.

“Hmm indeed,” Maotelus said. “But it was still pretty rude, I think.”

[t3hwh1t3p4nth3r]

Lotura Week Day 6! (Late)

“Pidge, Hunk and Coran have always enjoyed tinkering with things. This time, though… I fear they may have gone too far.”

 Lotor tilts his head, an eyebrow raised, as he stares at the curious contraption.

 “What is it, exactly?”

 Pidge beamed.

 “We worked out the theoretical details all last week. I think I made slept three hours tops the whole time.”

 That doesn’t seem far from the truth. Pidge’s eyes are bloodshot and crazy, dark circles ringing them. There are also many empty cups of the closest thing to coffee Coran had to offer. Hunk pushes forward, too excited and wired on caffeine to let Pidge explain all the science.

 “We made a Time Machine!”

 Shiro looks a bit skeptical.

 “A Time Machine? Is that even possible? And if it is, don’t you think that’s dangerous? What if something got screwed up? We’ve all seen the movies…”

 “That’s the beauty of what we’ve done! We created it so that we can travel through time, but can’t interact with it. We can only observe. And the Machine itself will be hidden, using the same cloaking technology I programmed into Green. It can only travel on the timeline that it’s set on in the present, though. See, with every decision that gets made, it slightly alters what timeline our consciousnesses are currently traveling on. This ties into the multiple reality theory. Usually only big decisions will REALLY effect the timeline, but there are butterfly effects that can cause unknown, huge consequences. Like when-“

 “What Pidge is saying is that there’s no risk for us to ruin the past and the future we see will only exist if things keep going basically the way that they’re going now.”

 Pidge pouts.

 “Well… Yeah… That’s the REALLY simplified version… Also, I’ve programmed it to lock on to the D.N.A of whoever touches the control panel so that it can visit the corresponding D.N.A in any era that they existed. It can also accept information put in manually for location and such.”

 Though still wary of the idea, everyone is rather intrigued by the concept.

 Coran jumps forward, eyes and moustache twitching.

 “So! Who wants to give it a try! We should all be able to fit!”

 Shiro shakes his head.

 “I think you three really ought to get some rest.”

 “NO!”

 Pidge’s voice made all of them recoil slightly.

 “We have been DYING to show you guys all the progress we’ve made! We’re doing this NOW! We can sleep when we get back!”

 Shiro looked just as startled as the rest of them.

 “Alright then. You heard her. Everyone in.”

 It wasn’t as crowded as it seemed it would be.

 “Alright! Whose past and future do we wanna visit? Allura! How about yours!”

 The princess gave a small nod.

 “Alright.”

 She stepped forward, placing her hand on the pad. Coran entered a date from 10,000 years ago into the Machine.

 They found themselves inside what looked like a laboratory. The land outside was not Altea. They all looked around, trying to spot Allura. The entire Machine was see through for them. Allura turned around and froze. There were her parents. With a past version of Zarkon and Honerva. Lotor’s reaction was rather similar, seeing this version of his parents, particularly his father.

 “He looks… Happy. Is he smiling?”

 Lotor didn’t seem aware that he had spoken out loud. Everyone else had to admit: the sight of a young, smiling Zarkon was indeed very strange.

 They watched as King Alfor handed baby Allura to Honerva. Allura gasped, her eyes widening and an excited smile passing her lips.

 “Honerva held me! THE Honerva held me!! And I pulled her hair!”

 They all watched as Zarkon presented a small helmet to King Alfor. A gift for the Princess. It was little too big for her, but she seemed to enjoy it all the same. Lotor shakes his head lightly.

 “What a relic, even then. Those haven’t been used practically for centuries. They’ve long been relegated to purely ceremonial purposes. Though it does mean, at that time at least, he was extending a promise to protect you.”

 Allura looks to him, meeting his gaze. She still had the helmet, but she had never known the meaning that it held.

 “That’s pretty ironc, given how things turned out.”

 Pidge tended to have next to no filter when she was this exhausted. She wasn’t wrong, though.

 It wasn’t terribly long before baby Allura spat up on her father’s shoulder. Allura’s cheeks turned very red as she reached for the panel.

 “I think we can see a different time, now. “

 She pressed one of the buttons on the console, taking them a few years into the future.

 Allura is now a little girl. She looks to be somewhere around 6, perhaps a little older. She’s running around in the dining hall of the Castle of Lions. She gets scooped up by a large man with bright eyes. He looks a little like a bear, but far nicer. She giggles as he tosses her into the air and catches her.

 Allura smiles, watching the scene.

 “Gyrgan. He was always so sweet and kind to me.”

 “Gyrgan? Who was he?”

 “He was the original paladin of the Yellow Lion.”

 The scene seems to be a gathering of the paladins, though it doesn’t seem to have a very somber air to it. They looks down the table at all who are seated there. Honerva and Zarkon are near the end of the table, near Alfor and his wife. They look noticeably different from the previous memory they had just seen. Both are rougher around the edges, their features looking sharper. Zarkon’s eyes are purely yellow now, where before they had held irises similar to Lotor’s. Honerva looks far more changed, though. Her face looks hollow, her eyes no longer hold the spark they had before, and her smile seems weaker. Her hair was down, where it had previously been put up, and she conceals herself in a dark cloak.

 With the way she’s seated, though, the cloak does not very effectively conceal her larger stomach. They listen to the conversation and realize that must be the main reason for them all coming together: They’re celebrating the news that Zarkon and Honerva are expecting.

 They all comment on how sweet the occasion seems, especially when little Allura scurries over to Honerva and places a hand on her belly while asking questions. “Is it a boy or a girl? Do they have a name yet?” etc.

 The only one who seems to realize how hard this must be for Lotor to watch is Allura.

 “I think this is enough dwelling in the past. With the alliance, we really ought to be looking to the future.”

 She places her hand on the panel once more, entering in a time that’s 10 years beyond the present.

 The scene that emerges before them is Allura and Lotor sitting alone in the dining hall of the Castle of Lions. They seem to be doing research. No one is terribly surprised by that. They both look tired, but happy. It takes everyone a moment to realize that the pair is holding hands as they scroll through the information on their holo-screens. The group looks to the pair in the Machine with them. Both Allura and Lotor are blushing, having noticed the same detail.

 Their blushes grow deeper and their eyes wider when the door to the dining hall opens and two children enter. Both are perfect blends of Allura and Lotor’s features.

 Everyone in the Machine not currently paralyzed proceeds to freak out. Pidge and Hunk have started chanting “Oh my God Oh my God Oh my God” while wearing smiles that border on terrifyingly enthusiastic. Lance has ceased speaking coherently, attempting to communicate using only unintelligible sounds and flailing gestures. Coran looks as though he may pass out, yet still looks pleased at the sight of the children. Shiro has remained rather calm, but his expression looks like a deer in the headlights. His eyes are wide and his mouth forms the shape of a small “O”.

 Once the shock starts to wear off, though, they watch the future scene play out. They learn that the children are twins, one a boy and one a girl. The boy takes more after Allura but inherited Lotor’s claws. He enters holding his cheek, tears in his eyes. He had had a nightmare. While he was scared, his claws had come out and he had scratched his face. It wasn’t too deep, but it was bleeding. Alllura and her daughter went to get the kit to clean him up, leaving Lotor and his son alone.

 They watch as Lotor helps his son sit up in the edge of the table and try to help settle him down. He explains that the same thing happened to him a lot too, explaining that their claws tend to emerge when they’re under stress.

 “It isn’t always a bad thing. It’s true, they come out when you and I are scared or angry or nervous. But they can show up for good things too.”

 “Like what?”

 His tears were subsiding as he talked to his dad.

 “Well, like when I married your mother. Or when you and your sister were born. When you took your first steps, and said your first words. My claws were there in all of those moments, and it was because of how happy I was. I couldn’t have retracted them if I had wanted to.”

 They did all glance at the hands of the Lotor in the Machine with them. His blush continued burning as he tucked his hands out of sight.

 “Yes, my claws are out… Shut up…”

 They all continued watching the family interact. It ended with all four of them deciding it was time to return to bed. Coran pressed the button that returned them all to their present time.

 “I think we’d all do well to follow their lead.”

 Pidge and Hunk nodded, both evidently starting to crash. They all bid each other goodnight, heading to their own quarters until only Allura and Lotor remained in the room. Neither really knew what to say about what they had seen. Both wanted to say something, though. Though it had come as a bit of a surprise and though they had initially been a little embarrassed, they couldn’t deny that watching that future had made them very happy. Both wanted it to become reality, even if they weren’t sure how to voice it yet.

 Without thinking, Lotor leaned in, pressing a kiss to Allura’s lips. He gave a small bow as he pulled away.

 “Sleep well, Allura.”

 He seemed a little stiff as he left to go to his room. Allura smiled as she noticed that his claws were out.

 000

 Allura was the only one still awake. Her thoughts tormented her. She doubted she would ever again be able to sleep soundly. So many happy memories had turned painful after everything that had happened yesterday.

 She still didn’t know how to feel about all of this. How could Lotor have done such a thing?!? And how could he have kept such a major secret between the two of them?!? She felt so used and stupid and… and heartbroken.

 Her eyes drifted over to the Time Machine. Did she dare? She was certain she wouldn’t like anything that saw. How could she after all that had happened?

 She stepped into the Machine, her gaze locked onto the panel. After what felt like hours, she reached out and entered the time for 5 years into the future.

 The image she saw was not resolved like all the others had been. They weren’t fixed. It kept jumping between two images. The one image was a familiar type of scene: She and Lotor were together and happy. They both had hands on Allura’s stomach. It must be that she was expecting.

 But then the image would change. The image was not bright and happy like the other. Everything was darker, possessing a reddish purple glow. There was destruction everywhere she looked. She was no longer looking into the Castle of Lions. She wasn’t sure what she was seeing. But one thing she was certain of was that it didn’t bode well. The paladins lay on the floor, all badly injured. She was no exception. The cause of it stood above them all: Lotor. But not as they had come to know him. His appearance was rather unchanged, except for his eyes. They glowed purple, just as Zarkon’s had. He wasn’t Lotor anymore. She watched as Lotor approached her.

 The image shifted to him smiling, placing a gentle smile to her forehead.

 And back. He had her by the throat, raising her into the air. His expression was hollow, empty. It seemed as though he felt nothing anymore. It was as similar to the look on the faces of Haggar’s past puppets and Robeasts.

 As the images continued to shift, she sank to the ground. She cursed the tears springing to her eyes. How? How had everything gone so wrong? And how could they do anything to set it right?

  (Late. I’m sorry. *shame corner* I hope you enjoyed it)

 (prompts: time travel AU / past and future / family)

[quiescentem-puella]

Altered Carbon finale: why I hated it and why it felt wrong

This rant is mostly a translation on my chat with a friend, when I was frantically writing all the reason the finale of this wonderful series felt wrong to me. It was 4 am, I was sleep deprived and angry, so do not expect it to be a particularly cohesive rant. Also, it’s almost 2000 words long.

Disclaimers: of course, I can’t talk about the finale without spoiling everything, so read it only if you have seen ALL the episodes of Altered Carbon.

That said, let’s proceed.

Let’s start with two facts: I loved this show and I loved the chemistry between Ortega and Kovacs.

From their first interaction I was aware of the sexual tension and the potential of these two, but without really expecting anything (especially with the whole Quellcrest Falconer romance weighting on Kovacs). They had a good dynamic and they were extremely attractive: I was interested.

Surprisingly enough, the fact that they turned out not to be endgame was not the main reason why I hated the finale (even if it was certainly one of them).

This is gonna get long, so buckle up.

Ortega: same face, two lovers

I’m gonna start from something somewhat personal (but I hope it’s a sentiment shared by a lot of other people): I am fucking pissed off with how it all ended for Ortega.

When we discovered that Kovacs’ sleeve was actually her previous boyfriend’s I was a bit down because it meant that all the longing gazes, all the forlorn faces were directed to a ghost and not to Kovacs. But as the story progressed one thing became obvious: Ortega cared more about Takeshi than his sleeve.

I think it was pretty clear in general, especially after the fifth episode, but one instance that I can think of where Ortega is undoubtedly thinking more about Kovacs than Elias is when in the car rushing to the hospital she says, “He wasn’t dumb and you’re not that pretty”.

You. Even if when she wakes up she calls for Elias (and can we blame her? She has been partner with Ryker for we don’t know how many years; it’s a matter of habit, not love), here she is clearly associating that sleeve with Kovacs, not Ryker. I watched the show in English but I checked the scene in Italian to be sure: she’s not referring to a plural “you”, she’s talking to Kovacs. While it’s true that her initial interest was prompted by her love for Elias, it’s just as clear that by the end of the tenth episode she’s in love with Takeshi, no matter the sleeve.

This is why the ending enrages me so much.

I could have lived with Tak and Kristin parting ways (even if I would have been extremely saddened by it) but I can’t fucking accept that Ortega is going to go back with Elias wearing what she now recognises as Takeshi’s sleeve. I am not able to believe that after everything they went through together she is just gonna forget about Takeshi and go back to her lover like nothing changed, like she didn’t fell in love with someone else who was wearing that sleeve.

She sacrificed so much for Kovacs. She lost her friend, her whole family and her arm. Sure, she didn’t do it willingly, but she was ready to put everything at risk because she thought Kovacs was in danger. She was kidnapped, beaten and tortured and she was willing to go on for Kovacs.

She unquestionably, tragically loves him.

And that brings me to my second point.

Kovacs: past lover, present lover

Let’s go on with something that’s fucking obvious: Kovacs fucking loves Ortega.

I’m not even gonna discuss the whole “but he was in love with Quell first!!!!!” because love isn’t something you have a limited amount of and the whole I’m-dead-but-not-really thing makes it all a bit tricky. Kovacs can love two women and his love for Quell in the past isn’t diminished by his love for Kristin in the present.

But that’s the thing. Quell is in the past. She’s part of an era that is no more, an era Tak misses and he thinks he’s still a part of. Like it’s frequently remarked in the show, Kovacs is almost a relic of an ancient past and that weights on him immensely. It’s his burden.

This is clear by his visions, both of Quell and his sister.

Vision!Quell in particular is his tie to the past: she’s constantly telling him she’s just a fragment of his imagination but that doesn’t stop her from guiding him and influencing him. She’s the representation of his idolatry of her, something that Quell herself tells him it’s wrong (in the flashback episode she reveals herself for what she is: another human with all its flaws, who made mistakes and should not be put on a pedestal. Tak still doesn’t understand this, in my opinion).

In the moments before the crash of Head in the Clouds, it looks like he’s finally letting go of that past (on this point I’ll come back later). It looks like he’s finally free.

What the writers tricked me into thinking was that Kovacs was putting his ghosts to rest to start anew, with someone he loves equally deeply.

The fact that Kovacs loves Ortega is even more obvious than the other way around. He’s protective of her in a way that makes sense for a sister or a lover, not a simple friend. Even his own subconscious, in the disguise of vision!Quell, tells him he loves her. He is incredibly hurt by her calling him Elias, he continuously tries to save his sleeve for her, he runs to her rescue every time she’s in danger. While at first, he can’t seem to let go of his past love, he slowly falls in love with Kristin and Quell becomes a memory more than anything.

Choosing Ortega over her wouldn’t had meant sullying her memory or anything, but simply going on with his life like Vision!Quell suggest him to do multiple times.

Kovacs: betraying the “Envoy code”

Something I really liked was that, while the Envoys were clearly the “good ones”, they weren’t saints. They were soldiers fighting for a losing battle and they weren’t afraid to do what was necessary for their purposes. It’s the whole “the ends justify the means” spiel, but the fact that it is perpetuated both by the good guys and the evil ones makes it realistic instead of boring.

Quell is the leader of the Envoys, so it’s natural that it’s her voice that brings their “code” to life. I’m talking about the “befriend the locals” speech, of course, words that Kovacs tries to live by.

Key word: tries.

The best thing about these set of rules set by Quell is that Kovacs isn’t able to follow all of them, in particular this one. He initially uses the Elliot family and Ortega as means to an end but he gets attached to them in the process and they in return start to care for him.

He has, in a way, betrayed Quell’s teachings. He has evolved. He became something different.

By the end of the series Kovacs isn’t an Envoy anymore, no more than Rei is.

But now let’s talk about his homicidal little sister a bit.

Reileen: “I would do anything to get you back”

Something that really bugs me is: how do we know Rei was telling the truth?

It’s abundantly clear that she’s ready to do everything to have her brother back: I don’t think lying would be crossing any boundary. She has killed and betrayed her friends. She is gonna try everything.

When she tells Kovacs that Quell is alive it doesn’t feel like a big secret coming out, but more like a desperate last attempt to achieve her ultimate goal, namely having Tak by her side. She constantly uses his loved ones (like Ortega!!!!!) as a way to manipulate him and convince him to do her bidding. We don’t know if she’s telling the truth: frankly, I thought it was just another cheap trick.

(On a second note, what reason could have pushed her to save Quell? She was her primary enemy, the one that stole her brother from her. It makes no sense for her to aid her in any way)

But let’s say she’s actually telling the truth.

The other thing that bothers me is the following: would Quell be happy to be brought back?

Quell: the future she feared and hated

I must admit that I like Quell quite a lot: she was a fearless leader, with firm ideals and strong opinions. The fact that she was the one who invented stacks doesn’t deduct anything from her character; on the contrary it adds to it. It shows us that she was ready to right her wrongdoings, because that was what the stacks ultimately became in her eyes. She was ready to die to bring the real death back: she didn’t want to live forever. Not anymore.

That really clashes with Tak’s frantic search that starts at the end of the last episode. What is he gonna do when he finds her? Spun her back like nothing happened? Like he didn’t kill his sister, like his sister isn’t responsible for her death, like the world didn’t exactly become what she feared it would?

When Kovacs was ready to kill his sister and lose Quell forever, I was overjoyed. It was the final step in leaving his past behind, symbolised both by Rei and his lost lover. I saw it as Tak finally saying, “no, no more”.

He was finally accepting that the world he knew and the people that lived in it were dead. He was realizing that Quell was right: death was what ultimately made us all equals and it is a natural part of our existence. We cannot call ourselves human beings if we don’t have the possibility to die.

Quell was ready to die to bring real death back. She would have hated how the world turned out to be, because she was right and the rich are now immortal, the poor only poorer and more miserable.

It was such a big moment for Takeshi in the way I interpreted it. It was his turning point. It was his absolution.

And then it turns out it wasn’t anything. In the end it didn’t represent anything, not anymore. It wasn’t Kovacs letting go of his past. It was just him killing his sister. Nothing more.

 To sum it up

I think the main reason I was so pissed at the ending was that it ultimately represented a step back for everyone involved. For Ortega it was going back to a man that had left her thinking she betrayed him, a man I don’t think she loves anymore. For Kovacs it was clinging to the past so fiercely he leaves his new lover, his friends, for a quest that will probably bring him only more despair.

The reason I hated the ending so fiercely was that I watched these characters grow and develop, only to ultimately regress to how they started out in the first episode.

[black-strike-otp]

part 98

When it’s hard to write becuz u feel like ur up too late keeping other ppl awake

Warm air moaned through the cracks and crevices of bent and misshapen metal. It gave off whistles and caused thinner pieces to wave in the air as a breeze came in from the Sea of Rust. There must have been a blistering storm going in order for the bots to feel the effects of it all the way to the colonial hideout. Luckily, it didn’t dampen the spirits or process of those hard at work.

Four bots stood together in a line, staring to the skies and the dark massive figure hovering high above Cybertron. Some bots dangling from chairs hanging from anchor points and rigged with harnesses, other climbing on ladders and even the structure itself as they received beams from Blackout to weld and bolt into place.

“Looks like they’re about done,” Barricade noted. “How tall did Blackout say it was?”

“I believe somewhere around the three-thousand foot mark?” Venus noted.

“At least it doesn’t require more than bare structure,” Novastrike whispered with awe. “Imagine if it was an apartment complex and the floors and walls we’d have to build.”

“May yet do,” Scorponok chattered. “If live long. See Cybertron reborn.”

The other three nodded with helms in various degrees of agreement. Although the possibility felt slim and out of reach, it was still a potential. The future was riddled with the unknown.

“That’s going to be one big target,” ‘Cade pointed out.

“No doubt,” Novastrike agreed. “But we need it to be tall enough to breech above possible lower level interference. It’s practically out of the atmosphere already, which means it should get a clear frequency signal out to space.”

Metal clanked as more beams rang against each other softly. As bots unhooked the tethers to beams they had secured, Blackout whirled around and came in low to pick up the final piece they’d be needing.

The top of the tower had been prefabricated and constructed on the ground. Its high-rise beams and adorning blinking lights to alert fliers and seekers not to hit the structure were attached. Bots from below and above were preparing the data streamers, cables, and power units from in various networks to make sure everything connected as smoothly as possible.

Blackout raised the massive composed structure off the ground effortlessly. Bots at various points on the ground and along the structure held on to extended straps to help keep it from swaying too much as his thrusters rumbled and he raised up with the item in tow to the very tippy top of the assembled piece. With nonstop progress, efficient workers, and a constant day and night shift of work, the project only had managed to take them roughly thirty days in total.

It was both a feet of engineering as it was a chronicle of the accounts of determination and willpower. If it stood, and worked as all hoped, it would be one of the most successful post Golden era achievements of the age.

In the opinion of all present and accounted for, at least. Some bots may be swayed to the belief that a synthetic energon could be adjusted over the years, though it still had not been perfected. Or other factors in medical care that had to be designed during the war were a good candidate too.

But the transmitter was teamwork at its finest. It held the hope of its builders in its simple commonplace design and with the very tippy top as Blackout held it into place for bots to begin checking, double checking, and triple checking every nut and bolt they put, every weld they placed. The antenna and various loads of equipment tucked snuggly at the bottom of it couldn’t be damaged, or all their work would be for nothing.

Blackout remained patiently still as the crew worked to assemble the remaining attachments and connect some vital last-minute wires between the computer and the antenna. Giving the thumbs up, some of the bots began to descend the behemoth whilst others got down the faster route: disarming their anchors and hanging to tethers and ladders still dangling from Blackout’s undercarriage to be taken down.

“Watching all these bots makes me wish I’d went into building fabrication,” ‘Cade stated thoughtfully.

Venus turned her optics to him, smiling sweetly as she speculated aloud, “That would have been nice, I guess I would have found a different mech to spend my time with at the institute.”

“Psh, I was only kidding,” he mumbled. “Building’s for chums.”

A working bot paused as he walked by, glancing to Barricade. The size of his derma were so massive that they protruded past a partially broken face mask he had in place. The bot gave a shake of his helm, walking away.

“I didn’t mean it!” Barricade called after him. “He knows I didn’t mean it, right?”

“Babe, maybe let the bots work in peace.”

“Besides,” he went on while placing a servo around Venus’ waist. “I like to burn rubber and cause too much trouble to stand in one spot for most of the day just doing the same task over and over again. I like to mix it up.”

Creating a soft ‘mhm’ in the back of her throat, Venus smiled with endearment as she leaned close to press a kiss against the side of his helm. The flashy cop purred his engines softly in response and returned the favor in kind with a kiss on her forehead.

“That’s gross,” Scorponok vowed with a tap of his pedes as he shifted himself and his gaze away from the couple.

“Don’t be mad just because you haven’t found a lady Insecticon yet Scorponok,” Barricade taunted lightly.

“Repugnant,” the scorpion clicked unhappily.

Pitying the poor bug for the josting he got too often, Novastrike stepped over to him and placed her servo upon his helm. He tilted his helm back so that three of his four golden optics turned to her, with one still focused on Blackout’s figure as he continued playing air life support to those getting off of the intergalactic transmitter.

Turning her optics to her beloved, Nova returned in watching as he helped down the last of the crew that awaited his pickup. He showed a tremendous amount of patience as he lowered himself softly to the surface of Cybertron and waited for bots to come unfasten all the tethers that had been latched on to various areas of his frame for structure. Even if Blackout liked to boost that he was more than capable of handling the weight easily, Novastrike found herself wincing inwardly. He hadn’t acted at all as of late like he’d been in pain, but when she truly thought about how he’d been spending day and night helping to get bots on and off the tower, lifting heavy equipment and rods, she felt a great deal of sympathy for her lovely mech.

Maybe she’d have to spend some time later with him if he would sit down long enough to let her give him some much needed TLC. A nice rubdown, a bit of polishing maybe, some well-deserved kisses while he just lounged.

Once the remainder of the fasteners were removed, Blackout reconfigured his armor around swiftly into his bipedal state. His helm gave an approving slight nod to the closest mech to him, saying something. They motioned with their servo up to the top of the immense construction project and then over to a nearby bot.

Unable to wait any longer, Novastrike darted around the workers pedes and over to Blackout. She could hear Venus and Scorponok try calling out to her. She guessed it was probably something about not getting in the way and being safe, but if the soaring pillar hadn’t fallen so far, she was pretty sure there was nothing to be concerned about.

As Blackout made his way over to a group of mechs stationed beside an enclosed monitor, Nova swerved to follow him.

“Evening Blackout!” the mech called out.

He nodded his helm respectfully.

“Just about to turn on the transmission signal you had recorded,” he stated. “The receiving unit should be finished in a couple joors. Some bots had to rewire a couple o’ things. But it’s not like our signal should be reading in the Andromeda galaxy right away since it has a lot o’ light-years to travel. You sure that’s where your friend is?”

Opening his mouth to answer, Blackout turned his optics down to the quiet huffing and puffing that came running up to his side. He raised an optic ridge down at Novastrike, grinning a little as she looked up to him.

“Hey,” she breathed out heavily.

“Hey to you too,” he rumbled, finding himself smiling a little wider.

“Are we about to turn this thing on?” Nova inquired, flicking her audio receptors forward.

“I was just about to say,” Blackout continued, turning his optics now to the mech. “That he was free to start transmitting. I’m not exactly sure where our ally is. I can only guess he started back to retracing our steps. Where we’d been and the area where we’d met up prior should have given him a good indication where to start working. How wide is our spectrum in the region?”

“About 8 light-years, give or take.”

“Well, we can certainly expect eventually to pick up some chatter and backfeed from the open receiver,” Blackout grunted with a nod of his helm. “Go ahead. Fire away.”

Bobbing his helm up and down, the mech turned into the partially enclosed monitor and moved around some wires into various plugs. He keystroked various things into the keypad and closed the box up.

Novastrike turned her helm back and squinted into the sky.

“Are we supposed to see if it’s doing anything?”

“No,” the engineer laughed. “It’s sending frequencies and coded encryption we can not hear; you won’t see anything but the warning lights along the tower maybe meant to indicate there’s a building so no one hits it.”

“How will we be able to receive anything back?” Novastrike asked desperately.

“Our coding indicates constant updates in the position and re-positioning of the tower as Cybertron circles its star,” the bot explained. “So long as there’s nothing that ends up blocking a sender's signal, they should be able to reply. It may get, how do I put this... back-logged, but so long as they put their message on a loop as we do, it will eventually arrive to the antenna.”

“There are two separate streaming data feeds. One sends, while the other receives. Our receiver isn’t ready; not a big problem as I said before as no bot will be getting our message instantaneously and if they are well, they’re close enough to Cybertron to turn their afts around and get here anyway. We should have it done not long from now. It offers a closed channel comm feed too that some of the crew and Blackout can privately access via their personal comm to check the receiver in real time to see if there’s any responses. Otherwise, we will have bots on manned duty keeping check on everything.”

“Sounds like a lot of work,” Novastrike breathed. She could feel stress just listening to this bot. She couldn’t imagine being in charge of any of this stuff.

Turning her optics up to Blackout, the little femme inquired quietly, “What did you send in the message, anyway?”

“I briefly left Nighthawk a status report that we were okay,” he responded. “Some minor details on our whereabouts, and an inquiry if he’d gotten any leads. I’ll have the loop changed if anything else comes up. Though, there will be no telling in what time or frame he may pick them up, if at all.”

Flicking her optics to the mech, Novastrike waited until he was walking away until she whispered, “How long can we loop our message through the antenna before some of these workers demand we start looping their messages in random directions hoping to get in contact with their friends?”

Blackout vented. “I don’t know. Considering this is the one and only way to currently communicate outside of Cybertron, it’s going to attract a lot of attention both from our own rogue faction as well as other bots. For the time being, bots are satisfied it’s complete and they know there’s a message getting out there. Vague, but out there. So we could get responses from any bot that technically hears the message.”

“Therefore,” he went on, “If we need to add more to the loop, there’s always the option of just making an extremely lengthy loop of data, or just debriefing specific bot’s names and a short mock of information they want to get out there. It’ll be like drawing straws if it comes to that though to decide who gets to grace the loop or not. We don’t need to add hundreds of names, it’ll just deter those who get the stream of information. No bot will want to, or may even be capable of, going through all that data to try looking for one name of someone they recognize and seeing a strange encrypted message.”

“Even if they do,” Blackout went on, “if we get a response, we would have to have a massive vote or some kind of elected mass to decide if we resume sending out the same feed, or try just signaling the one response we get with a reply to whomever the responder chooses to speak with.”

“Sounds... complicated,” Novastrike stated with an anxious smile. “You could have just told me ‘There’s only one message right now going out, it’s ours, and let’s hope to hear back from Nighthawk soon.”

Frowning, the obsidian giant drew his optic ridges together. “But that would not have been efficient as it hardly answered your questions.”

“Yeah, all the other stuff didn’t answer my questions much better,” she admitted.

Snorting back laughter, Blackout shook his helm slightly. He had a peaceful smile on his faceplate that warmed Novastrike’s spark as she watched him.

Extending his servo, the mech made a curling motion with his digits as he murmured softly, “May I?”

With a nod of her helm, Blackout knelt down and allowed her to climb upon his servo. As he rose to his full height, he brought her against his chassis. The thick, dark armor was already slightly warmed as the dark armored mech held her close to himself, directly over his spark chamber.

Snuggling back into her mech’s impervious armor plating of his chassis, Novastrike looked out at all the bustling bots walking around still. Some were congratulating each other, others were simply sharing dull-lit energon cubes, more still were wandering in the direction of the rogue base to probably get some much deserved rest.

She could make out Venus, Barricade, and Scorponok talking to a few of the bots in a huddled group. Some of the bots were making wild motions with their arms dramatically. The duo seemed invested in the conversation, though the scorpion not so much.

Nova had to smile a she watched ‘Cade take Venus by the servo. His arm moved back and forth with hers, their digits intertwined.

“What do we do now?” Novastrike whispered softly, turning her helm up to look into Blackout’s dark crimson optics.

He prepared a captivating small smile, just for her. With a twitch of his servo and rearrangement of his digits, Blackout managed to move his digits to be able to caress from her audio stacks down her backstrut.

She wriggled beneath the contact, purring vibrantly. Pressing her side against his armor, Novastrike looked to him with shimmering optics as she rested her cheek to him, listening to the mechanics of his body with her sensitive ears so close. The sound of his spark was just beneath the surface, pulsing quietly and humming an exceptionally beautiful tune.

“For now, all we can do is wait.”

[daringdragons]

[Pictured: Malia, Rusila, and Kepi]

@veldeien @dragonhomeclan @sweetheart-swan @jadedragons If anyone would like to be tagged for future lore stories from me, let me know!

Shifting Winds Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Interlude 1, Interlude 2, tag for all related stories to this arc, general story tag ~

recommended listening: Lost and Found by Katie Herzig, I Will Wait by Mumford and Sons, Bloom by The Paper Kites, Red Flag by The Moth and The Flame

Love is Patient, Love is Kind, Love Will Make You Lose Your Mind; oh the world it is sleeping, but my world is you

-

Two and half years ago

The pirate ship rocks amongst the roaring waves, and yet all Malia could hear was the roaring in her ears, the tightening of her chest as she read and re-read the letter that had so carefully been left on the table in her room. Outside, the crew was wondering where their captain and a number of their fellow crewmembers had gotten off to. Malia couldn’t care less where Aranea was, half-hoped that she’d never return, but the same couldn’t be said for the captain’s daughter.

A year of pretending to be each other’s mates, and now Rusila was gone, leaving behind nothing but a piece of parchment.

(It had been like something out of a story. Rusila’s mother had wanted to match her up Rasmus, a newcomer to a ship and barely more than a child, not to mention of a gender that Rusila wasn’t particularly interested in.

Rusila had panicked beneath Aranea’s expectant gaze, and had quickly told her mother that her and Malia had been seeing each other in secret, that she couldn’t possibly be with Rasmus.

Aranea had always favored Malia, so of course she instantly approved, and Malia? Malia had been more than happy to play along after Rusila asked her to, stuttering adorably.

She would often wonder if that might’ve been the time to tell Rusila that she had always had a crush on her, and perhaps of made their fake relationship into a real one.)

Sitting down heavily on her bed, Malia read the letter for the seventh time, the parchment crinkling slightly in her tight grip.

Malia,

By the time you read this, if all goes well, I will of been gone for hours. Rasmus is taking Cord, Dalia, the children, and I somewhere far away, somewhere that my mother can no longer hurt us. At least, that’s the hope. I wish that I could tell you where, but that would be too dangerous.

I feel like a coward telling you this in a letter instead of in the flesh, but I knew that I would never be able to tell you otherwise.

I just needed you to know that my feelings towards you were never pretend. I wish that I could’ve told you that during the last year, but I was always too afraid. I didn’t want to lose you.

I know that you probably don’t feel the same, and that’s alright. I appreciate everything that you did for me over the past year, Malia, more than I can say.

I hope that we will see each other again someday, in a different life. Be safe.

I love you.

-Rusila

Those three words stare up at Malia, taunting her, curling around her heart and squeezing tight. She wants to scream, she wants to cry, she wants to fly away into the rain until she finds Rusila, taking her by the arms and whispering, I love you, too.

It’s too late for that, though, and so instead she runs her fingers along those three damned words one last time before folding up the letter into a tiny square, tucking it into a small pocket in her swordbelt, where no one will find it.

In three days, Aranea will return, half-drowned and bloody, having murdered two of her other children. In a year, Aranea will die, killed at the hands of her vengeful granddaughter, and Malia will seize control of the ship, much to the happiness of the crew.

A year and a half after Rusila left, Malia finally sets eyes on her again, but it’s too late.

When Rasmus had contacted her about becoming a partner to the kingdom he now led, sending along the no longer secret coordinates to the island that they lived on, Malia had immediately set sail. Sure, the opportunity interested her, but everyone on the ship knew that she had an ulterior motive, and were all less-than-secretly rooting for her.

(“Excited to see your girl again, Captain?” Kalliope had teased, winking at the Skydancer.

“Shut up, Kalli,” Malia had nearly blushed, and the Pearlcatcher had only laughed, patting her captain on the back.)

When Malia finally saw Rusila again, the first thing she noticed was how happy the other Skydancer looked.

The second thing she noticed was Rasmus’ little sister, Kepi as she would later learn, on Rusila’s arm, smiling as she kissed the taller dragon on the cheek.

Malia decided that she couldn’t quite fault Rusila for moving on after so much time had passed, certainly since they’d never even been truly together, but that didn’t stop her from sending Rusila longing looks every time she returned to Roava, unsure whether or not she wanted her to notice.

(Rusila never did, but Kepi certainly took notice.)

Present

Kepi found her mate on the balcony outside of their shared room, leaning against the stone railing, staring out into the distance.

In the waters just off the coast, The Crimson Jewel, the ship that had once belonged to Rusila’s mother, was burning. It was an intentional fire, and its former crew stood on the shoreline, celebrating the ship’s demise.

For a time, Rusila’s niece, Savitri, and Malia had played at being friendly rivals, but they had recently come to a mutual agreement; neither of them were the perfect captains of their respective ships, but together they would be a force to be reckoned with. Deciding to become co-captains of Savitri’s ship, The Scion’s Triumph, they had then quickly come to the decision to destroy the Jewel.

The boat was haunted by Aranea’s cruel ghost - not literally, though sometimes it felt like it - and no one was sad to see her legacy meet a flame-filled end.

(Earlier in the day, Kepi had accompanied Rusila down to the docks when she went to see the ship one last time.

Rusila had grown up on the Jewel, and nearly all of her best and worst memories lived on that boat. She had run her hand across the smooth red wood, from end to end, before standing at the edge of the ship, staring out at the water.

Heaving a shaky sigh, she nodded, before turning away and disembarking, giving Kepi a watery smile as they made their way back to the castle.)

Leaning against the railing next to Rusila, the two stood there in silence for a bit, watching the Jewel slowly break apart, the sunset a rather nice backdrop for the end of a tragedy filled era.

“I wish that my mother could’ve seen this,” Rusila finally said, a hard glint in her eye. “She loved that ship, more than anything. More than she ever loved Magnus or I. I wish that she could’ve seen it burn, and could’ve felt the sort of loss she should’ve felt over her own children.”

Kepi rested a hand on her mate’s back, rubbing lazy circles as she spoke.

“I’m sure that your mother is rolling over in her grave as we speak.”

Rusila smiled a bit at that, and after a few more moments she shifted, moving behind Kepi, wrapping her arms around her as she rested her chin on top of the queen’s head. Her movements were slow, always just the slightest bit hesitant when initiating any sort of physical contact.

They stayed like that, quietly watching the “show”, until the sun was nearly gone, stars beginning to dot the sky above them.

“I miss it, sometimes,” Rusila eventually murmured, her voice tinged with melancholy. “The sea.”

“The ocean’s right there,” Kepi teased, though she was pretty sure she knew what Rusila truly meant, and she’d be lying if she said it didn’t scare her just a little bit.

“You know what I mean…sailing, being out there on the open sea with nothing but ocean around you for miles and miles. Or maybe you don’t know what I mean, sky pirate,” It was Rusila’s turn to tease, referencing Kepi’s mother’s airship.

(Kepi bristled just the slightest bit at the mention of her family, thankful that Rusila couldn’t see the way that her face fell, or her teeth clenched.)

Finally, pushing aside any vulnerability that threatened to creep into her voice, Kepi asked the question that worried her the most.

“Would you ever want to go back to it? To that life?”

“Maybe someday,” Was Rusila’s airy, breathed out response, and while she thought that the “only if you came with me” went without saying, it most certainly did not in Kepi’s mind.

Kepi had invited the crew of the Scion’s Triumph to dinner in the castle that night, and it had turned into a rather raucous celebration. Stretching long into the night, Kepi was mid-conversation with one of the crewmembers when she saw it, out of the corner of her eye: Malia, leading Rusila from the room by her hand.

(It’s nothing, you can trust Rusila, a part of her mind reassured her.

But can you trust Malia? Follow them, another voice advised, and so she did.)

Excusing herself from the conversation, Kepi made her way towards the door as inconspicuously as possible, not wishing to draw any attention to herself.

Once outside, it was easy enough to figure out where the pair had gone, their voices easily heard from around a nearby corner. Creeping towards the adjacent wall in a way that looked absolutely ridiculous for a queen, Kepi rested her back against the wall and listened.

“-maybe it’s time for you to get to bed,” Rusila’s voice was quiet, coaxing.

“No, Rus, please, I just…I just can’t put this off any longer, please just listen,” Malia’s voice was only slightly louder, pleading, sounding entirely more emotional than Kepi had ever heard the captain.

Rusila must of gestured for her to continue, judging by the quietly murmured “thank you” from Malia. There was a stretch of silence, before finally-

“I still have that letter you left for me. I read it every now and then, as…I don’t know, as a reminder, I guess. Of what could’ve been…of what still could be, some day.”

“Malia, I’m with-”

“With Kepi, I know! I know, and I’m not asking you to choose. I just…I need you to know that…I love you, too.”

“Too?” Kepi couldn’t help the chill that ran through her at the use of that word; Rusila had told Malia that she loved her? When? Unable to help herself, the queen just barely peeked around the corner, finding herself with a side view of the other two. They stood less than a foot apart, and that alone made her want to interrupt, made her want to walk over and shove Malia away from her mate.

Instead, she stayed still, waiting to see what Rusila’s reaction would be.

“Malia, I…I-”

“It’s okay, I know that you might not still feel the same way, I don’t…let’s just forget I said that, okay?” Malia began to back away, sounding uncharacteristically uneasy, but before she could get very far, Rusila grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her in.

Kepi’s heart stopped for a moment before she realized that Rusila had merely pulled Malia in for a hug, not something else; nonetheless, her mate’s next words still made her heart ache.

“I do still love you, I’ve never stopped,” She said, holding Malia close, and after a moment of shock she hugged Rusila back, eyes fluttering closed.

Kepi had heard and seen enough; as quietly as possible she turned and fled, willing away any tears that threatened to fall, her mind whirling.

If only she’d stayed a moment longer, she would’ve heard her mate’s next words:

“But I love Kepi too, I love her so much, and I just…this is all too much, Malia,” Pulling away, this time it was Rusila that took a few steps back, though Malia made no move towards her, clearly seeing the other dragon’s sudden anxiousness. “Everything with Rasmus, and how strangely Kepi’s been acting lately, and now you tell me this, I just…I just can’t…”

Rusila’s voice broke as she trailed off, not making eye contact with Malia, and the captain finally put her hands out in an attempt to stop Rusila’s increasingly panicked rambling.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay…the last thing I want is for my…my feelings for you to be another problem on your plate. Really, we can just…forget that I said anything, at least for right now, okay?”

Rusila finally looked up at Malia, her eyes searching the other dragon’s face for sincerity, before nodding, wiping at tears that had yet to fall. Malia smiled, a melancholy little thing, and Rusila smiled back, happier than she could say that Malia understood, that she understood Rusila as she always had.

Meanwhile, upstairs in the room they shared, Kepi was planning the conversation she would be having with Malia the next day, cutting all ties between the kingdom and her and her crew.

-

abrupt ending but??? this was…..entirely too much fun to write lololol. I really wanted to get the next part finished by today, because it’s intense, and it’s my birthday and I always post lore on my birthday, but this is a suitable fill-in lol. the other one will be finished very soon, though! and hoo boy, it’s very emotional.

the last two years the lore I’ve posted on my birthday have centered around Aranea, and while she may be dead, she’s still here in spirit. :’D the first year was about her getting her ship and becoming a pirate, the second year was her getting super dead, and now this time her ship is the one dying, so it’s pretty fitting~

make me happy on my birthday and ask me questions about these dramatic lesbians :’D

[marjaystuff]

Karen White Interview by Elise Cooper

Dreams of Falling by Karen White once again proves why readers have fallen in love with her books.  Blending together friendships, betrayal, loyalty, and forgiveness over three generations makes for a gripping plot.  At the heart of the mystery are the secrets each character is hiding.

This is a story about three generations of women and is told from the perspective of Ceecee, Ivy, and Larkin. The main story goes from the present day (2010) to 1951 flashbacks. Set in Georgetown, South Carolina, the story begins as Larkin returns home to help locate her missing mother, Ivy, and realizes there is a dark secret centering around the death of one of Ceecee’s best friends from high school. Margaret, Ceecee, and Bitty have just graduated from high school in 1951 with all their dreams ahead of them.  But they are shattered when Margaret finds she is an unwed mother who lost her boyfriend while fighting in the Korean War. Years later her daughter Ivy has a similar experience when she loses her recently married husband who fought in Vietnam.  Now the third generation, Larkin, must piece together what happened during those turbulent years. The mystery comes into play as the fifty-year secrets are slowly unveiled.  

White masterfully crafts a story that has deep emotion, a riveting mystery, and surprising twists. Readers will keep the pages turning to find out what happens to all the characters.

Elise Cooper: Why did you choose these timelines?

Karen White:  I am love with the 1950s and now had the pleasure of delving into this era.  This post war period was one of the best times to live in, and the crazy sixties had not happened yet.  I chose the other timeline, 2010, on purpose.  Bitty and Ceecee were still sprightly and would have been too old if I set it in 2018. I also wanted Ivy to be a particular age during the Vietnam War.  This way I could move from the Korean War to the Vietnam War.

EC:  Why dreams?

KW:  I had the Tree of Dreams, a moss-draped oak on the banks of the North Santee River. The three girls, Ceecee, Margaret, and Bitty, wrote their dreams on ribbons and placed it into the tree's trunk, including the most important one: ‘Friends forever, come what may.’ I personally have had really bizarre dreams, which my daughter tries to interpret.  My imagination and the desire to learn more about dreams is why I decided to put this in.  But the story is not about nocturnal dreams, but the dreams of the three girls, what they hoped for the future.

EC:  It seemed to be an anti-Cinderella story?

KW:  I wanted to have it realistic where dreams do not always come true.  I wanted to show it is not the end of the world if they don’t.  Another door will open, and that everyone should have a Plan B.

EC:  The characters had to deal with a loss of a loved one, some literally and some figuratively?

KW:  All the characters lived through it in a different way.  Both Ivy and her mother had to deal with grief.  For Ivy, she always wondered what could have been, creating a sad life.  When Margaret’s life fell apart she had no recourse because she was never taught to rely on herself, just a pampered rich girl.  Ceecee on the other hand had to fight for her place in the world and tried to make a purpose out of her life, a survivor.

EC:  How would you describe Larkin?

KW:  She is a little bit of all of us.  Successful professionally but when you look inside of her there are gaps.  We all wear masks.  Everyone thinks she has no past, but she has this gaping hole that needs to be filled.  She has been away from home for nine years, but comes back to forgive people.  She decides to look toward the future.

EC:  The secrets bring in the mystery?

KW:  Each character had a different reason for keeping them.  It presented the family and friend dynamics.  Maybe they were used to save a friendship or to protect those they loved.  I do not think people who keep secrets always have bad intentions.  The mystery is what happened between the friends. To emphasize this point I put in the quote, ‘It’s easy to be kind and giving and loyal when you have everything.  But the mark of a true friend is when everything is taken away and you’re still kind, giving, and loyal.’

EC:  The house, Carrowmore, also plays a role?

KW:  The house is based on a real place.  My daughter has a degree in house renovations and she took a whole class on the restoration of this plantation, named Tidwell. I put in the book the truth about developers, not some of my favorite people. In my books, I like to give a dig to things that bother me in society.  The National Forest people did not want the house, but did want the land to preserve it for development.  Tidwell was rescued from complete demolition and ruin.  I think old houses should be saved because they have such integrity. I put in this book quote about Carrowmore, “It’s been owned by your family since the seventeen hundreds, and the land, right on the river-I can’t imagine them razing all of these old-growth trees and the house and putting cluster homes on it.’ I think the house went through a transition just as the characters did.

EC: You have Ivy unconscious throughout the book.  How did you write those scenes?

KW:  I read a lot of anecdotal stories about people that have been in a coma.  They say they hear every word even though they cannot respond.  We should read and talk to people even if they cannot communicate back.  In some sense, it is reassuring to understand this.  Ivy chose to hang on until her loved ones could come to their own realization about the secrets.  

EC:  Music plays a role in this book?

KW:  I have the same talent as Larkin where I can hear a few notes and name the song.  I am a music hound.  I love all types of music except Rap.  I want “Name That Tune” to come back because I would so be a contestant and I would so win. I adore Tom Petty so I gave him a nod because he died when I was writing the book.  When I was driving through Georgetown South Carolina I saw a sign about the annual Shag festival.  Of course, I had to check it out and write it into the story.  It is a combination of rock/R&B/pop music of the 1950s and 1960s. People can dance to it, kind of like Swing dance, but with a Carolina emphasis. I definitely need to learn how to dance it, everyone should.

EC:  Can you give a heads up about your next books?

KW:  I collaborated with authors Lauren Willig and Beatriz Williams on a book out in September called The Glass Ocean. It is set on the last voyage of the Lusitania, and goes back and forth between the perspective of someone in the present day and two characters on the ship. It will have intrigue, romance, and espionage. There will also be the sixth book in the Tradd Street Series that will continue to have historical homes, a South Carolina setting, and more adventures with Melanie Middleton and Jack Trenholm.

THANK YOU!!

[danithebookaholic-blog]

Top 10 to Run To

Top 10 to Run To

The following are my favorite books to listen to while running. The more detail there is to paint a picture for me and to keep my thoughts off of my burning lungs and aching hip flexors, the better! That's why Stephen King's IT is my number 1 choice. So much detail in that book, and if you're not paying attention to the detail, you're not going to understand what's happening.

Comedies are usually something that I don't listen to while running because I tend to lose control of my breathing when I'm laughing hysterically (I don't know if this is just me, or what?).  But Kevin Hart and Jim Gaffigan's books are perfect for those grey rainy days when you need a laugh just to get you through.

And then any time I can find a series that I enjoy running to, the more excited I am about running (I hate running, but I love it at the same time. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about!), and that's why I love The Warded Man (The Demon Cycle, Book 1). I'm anxiously waiting for book 5 to come out in October; perfect timing if you ask me!

The others on this list I love to run to just as much as the above mentioned for their own different reasons. Hopefully one of the following will be your perfect companion for that next run you have planned!

1) IT by Stephen King

Looking for a suspense-thriller? King's IT is the way to go! And just in time for the reboot that came out earlier this month.

To the children, the town was their whole world. To the adults, knowing better, Derry, Maine was just their home town: familiar, well-ordered for the most part. A good place to live. It was the children who saw - and felt - what made Derry so horribly different. In the storm drains, in the sewers, IT lurked, taking on the shape of every nightmare, each one's deepest dread. Sometimes IT reached up, seizing, tearing, killing . . . The adults, knowing better, knew nothing. Time passed and the children grew up, moved away. The horror of IT was deep-buried, wrapped in forgetfulness. Until they were called back, once more to confront IT as IT stirred and coiled in the sullen depths of their memories, reaching up again to make their past nightmares a terrible present reality. (source)

2) The Warded Man by Peter V. Brett

For the sci-fi fantasy lovers out there, this is the one for you! 

As darkness falls after sunset, the corelings rise—demons who possess supernatural powers and burn with a consuming hatred of humanity. For hundreds of years the demons have terrorized the night, slowly culling the human herd that shelters behind magical wards—symbols of power whose origins are lost in myth and whose protection is terrifyingly fragile. It was not always this way. Once, men and women battled the corelings on equal terms, but those days are gone. Night by night the demons grow stronger, while human numbers dwindle under their relentless assault. Now, with hope for the future fading, three young survivors of vicious demon attacks will dare the impossible, stepping beyond the crumbling safety of the wards to risk everything in a desperate quest to regain the secrets of the past. Together, they will stand against the night. (Source)

3) I Can't Make this Up: Life Lessons by Kevin Hart

 Hysterical memoir with a serious side. Kevin will have you laughing and thinking of your journey to success at the same time.

Superstar comedian and Hollywood box office star Kevin Hart turns his immense talent to the written word by writing some words. Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have the funniest, most heartfelt, and most inspirational memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself since Old Yeller. The question you’re probably asking yourself right now is: What does Kevin Hart have that a book also has? According to the three people who have seen Kevin Hart and a book in the same room, the answer is clear: A book is compact. Kevin Hart is compact. A book has a spine that holds it together. Kevin Hart has a spine that holds him together. A book has a beginning. Kevin Hart’s life uniquely qualifies him to write this book by also having a beginning. It begins in North Philadelphia. He was born an accident, unwanted by his parents. His father was a drug addict who was in and out of jail. His brother was a crack dealer and petty thief. And his mother was overwhelmingly strict, beating him with belts, frying pans, and his own toys. The odds, in short, were stacked against our young hero, just like the odds that are stacked against the release of a new book in this era of social media (where Hart has a following of over 100 million, by the way). But Kevin Hart, like Ernest Hemingway, JK Rowling, and Chocolate Droppa before him, was able to defy the odds and turn it around. In his literary debut, he takes the reader on a journey through what his life was, what it is today, and how he’s overcome each challenge to become the man he is today. And that man happens to be the biggest comedian in the world, with tours that sell out football stadiums and films that have collectively grossed over $3.5 billion. He achieved this not just through hard work, determination, and talent: It was through his unique way of looking at the world. Because just like a book has chapters, Hart sees life as a collection of chapters that each person gets to write for himself or herself. “Not only do you get to choose how you interpret each chapter, but your interpretation writes the next chapter,” he says. “So why not choose the interpretation that serves your life the best?” (source)

4) Outliers: The Story of Success by Malcolm Gladwell

For the analytic and the student to life, Outliers will have you questioning what your parents should have done differently that would have helped you win the race.

In this stunning new book, Malcolm Gladwell takes us on an intellectual journey through the world of "outliers"--the best and the brightest, the most famous and the most successful. He asks the question: what makes high-achievers different? His answer is that we pay too much attention to what successful people are like, and too little attention to where they are from: that is, their culture, their family, their generation, and the idiosyncratic experiences of their upbringing. Along the way he explains the secrets of software billionaires, what it takes to be a great soccer player, why Asians are good at math, and what made the Beatles the greatest rock band. (source)

5) The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern

Beautiful imagery, well written story, the only thing that would make The Night Circus better would be to listen to it while running in the dark.

The circus arrives without warning. No announcements precede it. It is simply there, when yesterday it was not. Within the black-and-white striped canvas tents is an utterly unique experience full of breathtaking amazements. It is called Le Cirque des Rêves, and it is only open at night... But behind the scenes, a fierce competition is underway - a duel between two young magicians, Celia and Marco, who have been trained since childhood expressly for this purpose by their mercurial instructors. Unbeknownst to them, this is a game in which only one can be left standing, and the circus is but the stage for a remarkable battle of imagination and will. Despite themselves, however, Celia and Marco tumble headfirst into love - a deep, magical love that makes the lights flicker and the room grow warm whenever they so much as brush hands.  True love or not, the game must play out, and the fates of everyone involved, from the cast of extraordinary circus performers to the patrons, hang in the balance, suspended as precariously as the daring acrobats overhead. (source)

6) See Me by Nicholas Sparks

Part romance, part thriller, See Me will satisfy a fan of either genre.

See me just as I see you . . . Colin Hancock is giving his second chance his best shot. With a history of violence and bad decisions behind him and the threat of prison dogging his every step, he's determined to walk a straight line. To Colin, that means applying himself single-mindedly toward his teaching degree and avoiding everything that proved destructive in his earlier life. Reminding himself daily of his hard-earned lessons, the last thing he is looking for is a serious relationship. Maria Sanchez, the hardworking daughter of Mexican immigrants, is the picture of conventional success. With a degree from Duke Law School and a job at a prestigious firm in Wilmington, she is a dark-haired beauty with a seemingly flawless professional track record. And yet Maria has a traumatic history of her own, one that compelled her to return to her hometown and left her questioning so much of what she once believed. A chance encounter on a rain-swept road will alter the course of both Colin and Maria's lives, challenging deeply held assumptions about each other and ultimately, themselves. As love unexpectedly takes hold between them, they dare to envision what a future together could possibly look like . . . until menacing reminders of events in Maria's past begin to surface. As a series of threatening incidents wreaks chaos in Maria's life, Maria and Colin will be tested in increasingly terrifying ways. Will demons from their past destroy the tenuous relationship they've begun to build, or will their love protect them, even in the darkest hour? (source)

7) Angels & Demons by Dan Brown

Start at the beginning of Robert Langdon's story in anticipation of the fifth (and final?) installment to his legend which is to hit shelves in early October.

An ancient secret brotherhood. A devastating new weapon of destruction. An unthinkable target...  When world-renowned Harvard symbologist Robert Langdon is summoned to a Swiss research facility to analyze a mysterious symbol -- seared into the chest of a murdered physicist -- he discovers evidence of the unimaginable: the resurgence of an ancient secret brotherhood known as the Illuminati... the most powerful underground organization ever to walk the earth. The Illuminati has surfaced from the shadows to carry out the final phase of its legendary vendetta against its most hated enemy... the Catholic Church.  Langdon's worst fears are confirmed on the eve of the Vatican's holy conclave, when a messenger of the Illuminati announces he has hidden an unstoppable time bomb at the very heart of Vatican City. With the countdown under way, Langdon jets to Rome to join forces with Vittoria Vetra, a beautiful and mysterious Italian scientist, to assist the Vatican in a desperate bid for survival.  Embarking on a frantic hunt through sealed crypts, dangerous catacombs, deserted cathedrals, and even to the heart of the most secretive vault on earth, Langdon and Vetra follow a 400-year old trail of ancient symbols that snakes across Rome toward the long-forgotten Illuminati lair... a secret location that contains the only hope for Vatican salvation.  An explosive international thriller, Angels & Demons careens from enlightening epiphanies to dark truths as the battle between science and religion turns to war. (source)

8) Dad is Fat by Jim Gaffigan

A great comedic laugh is always needed while on a long run. If you have young children in the house, then this is a double win for you!

In Dad is Fat, stand-up comedian Jim Gaffigan, who’s best known for his legendary riffs on Hot Pockets, bacon, manatees, and McDonald's, expresses all the joys and horrors of life with five young children—everything from cousins ("celebrities for little kids") to toddlers’ communication skills (“they always sound like they have traveled by horseback for hours to deliver important news”), to the eating habits of four year olds (“there is no difference between a four year old eating a taco and throwing a taco on the floor”). Reminiscent of Bill Cosby’s Fatherhood, Dad is Fat is sharply observed, explosively funny, and a cry for help from a man who has realized he and his wife are outnumbered in their own home. (source)

9) Finding Ultra by Rich Roll

What book list for runners would be complete without a book about physical limits and running itself?

Finding Ultra is Rich Roll’s incredible-but-true account of achieving one of the most awe-inspiring midlife physical transformations ever.   One cool evening in October 2006, the night before he was to turn forty, Rich experienced a chilling glimpse of his future. Nearly fifty pounds overweight at the time and unable to climb the stairs without stopping, he could see where his current sedentary lifestyle was taking him.   Most of us, when granted such a moment of clarity, look the other way—but not Rich.   Plunging into a new way of eating that made processed foods off-limits and that prioritized plant nutrition, and vowing to train daily, Rich morphed—in a matter of mere months—from out-of-shape midlifer to endurance machine. When one morning ninety days into his physical overhaul, Rich left the house to embark on a light jog and found himself running a near marathon, he knew he had to scale up his goals. How many of us take up a sport at age forty and compete for the title of the world’s best within two years? Finding Ultra recounts Rich’s remarkable journey to the starting line of the elite Ultraman competition, which pits the world’s fittest humans against each other in a 320-mile ordeal of swimming, biking, and running. And following that test, Rich conquered an even greater one: the Epic5—five Ironman-distance triathlons, each on a different Hawaiian island, all completed in less than a week.   But Finding Ultra is much more than an edge-of-the-seat look at a series of jaw-dropping athletic feats—and much more than a practical training manual for those who would attempt a similar transformation. Yes, Rich’s account rivets—and, yes, it instructs,providing information that will be invaluable to anyone who wants to change their physique. But this book is most notable as a powerful testament to human resiliency, for as we learn early on, Rich’s childhood posed numerous physical and social challenges, and his early adulthood featured a fierce battle with alcoholism.   Ultimately, Finding Ultra is a beautifully written portrait of what willpower can accomplish. It challenges all of us to rethink what we’re capable of and urges us, implicitly and explicitly, to “go for it.”(source)

10) Grey by E. L. James

With this add on to Fifty Shades, trust me, you're mind will be focus on the book, and not the task at hand! *This book is intended for mature audiences

Christian Grey exercises control in all things; his world is neat, disciplined, and utterly empty—until the day that Anastasia Steele falls into his office, in a tangle of shapely limbs and tumbling brown hair. He tries to forget her, but instead is swept up in a storm of emotion he cannot comprehend and cannot resist. Unlike any woman he has known before, shy, unworldly Ana seems to see right through him—past the business prodigy and the penthouse lifestyle to Christian’s cold, wounded heart.   Will being with Ana dispel the horrors of his childhood that haunt Christian every night? Or will his dark sexual desires, his compulsion to control, and the self-loathing that fills his soul drive this girl away and destroy the fragile hope she offers him? (source)

From one wine-loving bookaholic to another, I hope I've helped you find you next fix!     -Dani