#but nobody will like this UGLY BROKEN thing underneath. It'd be easier if it was something mean beneath but under it all im just a kid
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♥️ If you knew why the last one left me you would have passed me by ♥️
#I DON'T FUCKING GET IT. WHY WAS I THE BAD GUY? ALL I ASKED WAS TO BE LOVED RIGHT BUT YOU HELD ME DOWN INSTEAD#HOW COME YOU GET TO LIVE SOME DREAM LIFE AS IF I NEVER HAPPENED WHEN I STILL SLEEP ON THE SAME MATTRESS YOU STAINED?#HOW COME I CANT ASK FOR ANYTHING FROM ANYONE NOW BECAUSE I EXPECT TO BE PUNISHED?#WHY IS IT ME? I WAS SO GOOD I WAS THE BEST I COULD BE AND NOW LOOK AT ME. IM INSUFFERABLE TO BE AROUND BECAUSE OF YOU!!#im so tired. so so tired. i was good i swear I was. im sorry i know my tears are scalding to your icy skin i dont mean to cry#i just want to be loved#really loved. not just because they like how i make them feel. not just because im quiet and patient. not just because my mask is cute#but nobody will like this UGLY BROKEN thing underneath. It'd be easier if it was something mean beneath but under it all im just a kid#a stupid kid that finally started playing alone after years of being told they're annoying and stupid and hard to deal with#i tried so hard for so long didn't I? i was so determined to make a friend. i was even realistic! just one. just ONE.#how long has it been since i really felt loved? like loving me wasnt an obligation or a dare or some way to make another look better#ive just always been the okay child. not great but holding in there. nobody worries about me. not really.#fuck i hate myself#sad thoughts#vent blog#sad blogging#vent#vent post#actually traumatized#venting#actually mentally ill#actually obsessive#personal vent
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