#but my overall goal for this year was to read fewer books and make reading fun again

[libertyreads]

End of the Year Book Stats--

I read 172 books total which equaled 51,673 pages. The average number of pages per book was 300 pages. I averaged 14 books per month; I averaged 4,306 pages per month. Of these books, 41 were new releases, 130 were backlist titles, and 1 was a 2024 ARC. The longest book I read was The Curse of Broken Shadows by Laura Winter. The shortest was Home: Habitat, Range, Niche, Territory by Martha Wells. The total number of rereads was 26 books. I read 146 books that were completely new to me. My average rating per book was 3.32 stars.

[sixofravens-reads]

some vague reading goals for 2024:

first, an anti-goal: I won't make any goals about how many books I want to read. I want to get into more of my other hobbies in 2024 which means less reading time, so I can't have the pressure of a numerical goal that demands I spend all my free time reading or feeling bad for not reading. I will probably still use the storygraph reading challenge thing because I like using it to track what I read in the year, but the "goal" I set will be completely arbitrary.

reread a bunch of things! i love rereading but have been so laser-focused on reducing my TBR books the past couple years that I haven't done very much of it.

on that note, a few years ago I had an idea for a blog series called "nostalgia rereads" where I reread a book from my childhood/teen years and compare what I remember of it to my adult experience. I read one (1) book for that and then got distracted, but I have been buying a lot of those older books so I'd like to finally do that series.

start a reread of my Tamora Pierce books (though idk if I can finish it in one year, there are 32 of them now including anthologies, and I don't have my childhood stamina for reading a ton of one author's works at once lol)

read more nonfiction. i have a ton of really interesting books on my library list that i just haven't gotten to.

also, use the library more and buy fewer books (i have an overall goal to spend less money in general). I'd like to buy under 70 books next year (I know that still sounds like a lot, but I bought over 100 this year, so...baby steps)

keep my "books i own and haven't read" shelf to under 30 books so i don't get overwhelmed by it again (currently there's 43 books on it, most of them short, so this isn't a Huge reading goal)

read more translated books. I've got Flights by Olga Tokarczuk and There's No Such Thing as an Easy Job by Kikuko Tsumura on my shelf, and a bunch more on my library list.

stop forgetting about my comics and manga, and try and read more of them consistently instead of buying a bunch and forgetting them (hopefully not having a numerical reading goal or novel-specific goal will help with this, because I always feel like I'm "cheating" when I read comics and count them towards a numerical goal, and that's why I don't pick them up.)

on that note, read (reread?) Death Note, as I got the box set at the comic expo this year (I tried to read this series as a teenager but someone had massacred my library's copies and cut out all the pages with violence, sexy stuff, etc.)

read at least 1 Stephen King and 1 Agatha Christie novel, been meaning to get into those authors for years and somehow haven't done it yet.

start keeping notes on each book (probably on my phone) so it's easier to remember what I thought of them. at the end of the year when I make my top 10 or whatever list, I always have a hard time remembering what my true favourite books were bc I can't reference what I was thinking in the moment.

annnnd resurrect my Librarything account. I will need to do this early in the year, preferably after I finish weeding out all the books I want to get rid of. I only use Librarything to keep tabs on what books I own, what editions, etc, so reviews and such will still be on storygraph. There's a not-insignificant chance that the current housing crisis/skyrocketing rent might make me move back in with my parents for a bit, which means almost all my books will be in boxes and I'll need a digital catalog of some sort.

[princessjellyfish]

I managed to exceed my goal again and read 27 books this year!

This is kind of like a diary post, but if you’re curious what I liked and disliked there’s a lot more detail below the Read More.

The books are also in list form at the bottom.

Book count

3 of these books were started in 2022, so 24 were started and completed entirely within 2023. My goal was 16, so I’m still quite happy with this. The only re-read for me this year was Frankenstein, which I read in high school, so 26 books were new to me.

I completed 25 traditional books and 2 graphic novels – My Pretty Vampire by Katie Skelly and the Azumanga Daioh complete omnibus by Kiyohiko Azuma. I decided to just include these in the overall book count, especially because of how long the Azumanga Daioh omnibus is. That should maybe even count as several books! I loved Azumanga Daioh (now I want to re-watch the anime), and I thought My Pretty Vampire was just okay.

Genres and moods

I was surprised to see how many classics I read this year (9, according to StoryGraph). Though I think StoryGraph is questionable with its categorizations of some books (is The Summer Book really a classic?), even ignoring those, I still think this amount is higher than normal for me. I didn’t intend to read this many classics, it mostly just happened on accident, so I don’t expect there will be as many next year. Many of these were actually read with my partner while washing dishes (we read to each other, alternating each night who reads and who washes). –Side note: I can’t recommend this strategy enough if you have someone you can do it with. You’ll read so much more! We completed 5 books (and about ¼ of another) using this strategy, several of which were pretty long.– Frankenstein, Dracula, and Moby Dick, for example, are all classics which were read while washing dishes, and all three were some of my most enjoyable reading experiences this year. Even though I didn’t particularly like Frankenstein, the process of reading it with someone else and commenting on, riffing on, and sharing our thoughts on it with each other made it really fun. Other notable classics I read include The Glass Menagerie and The Picture of Dorian Gray.

Tied for my most-read genre is science fiction, also with 9 books. This isn’t a surprise because it’s my favorite genre and was by far my most-read genre last year. Most of my favorite books this year were sci-fi (more on those later), but there were also some misses, including Terraform: Watch/Worlds/Burn (which had a cool premise that unfortunately fell short, and very inconsistent quality between its short stories) and Roadside Picnic (classic sci-fi fans, don’t come for me, but I kind of hated this).

Last year 30% of the books I read were non-fiction, but this year I only read 11% non-fiction. Both of these values are unintentional. Last year I said I’d like to keep up my pace with non-fiction, but I didn’t make an effort to and didn’t actively think about this while choosing books to read this year. However, now that I’m at the end of 2023 I sort of wish I had read more non-fiction. It’ll be one of my goals for 2024.

StoryGraph’s mood categorizations are kind of odd, and I never really know what to do with this information, but compared to last year I apparently read many more “dark” books and a lot fewer “informative” books (obviously just code for “non-fiction”). “Reflective”, “adventurous”, and “challenging” show up a lot again this year.

Favorites

I rated three books 5 stars this year: Parable of the Sower, Howl’s Moving Castle, and Frida: The Biography of Frida Kahlo. My favorite books this year (I think of this differently than 5-star books) were (in order of completion): The Left Hand of Darkness, Parable of the Sower, Binti: The Complete Trilogy, Frida: The Biography of Frida Kahlo, Moby Dick, and The Devourers. Thoughts on each below:

Parable of the Sower is my first Octavia E. Butler book and it exceeded my high expectations. It’s incredibly dark (please check trigger warnings if you want to read it) and yet it’s somehow incredibly hopeful. I think this book is a really great example of what cli-fi should be. Climate change is effective as part of the setting rather as the main focus of the plot (I’m wary to read some other cli-fi books that I think could be too heavy handed, like Kim Stanley Robinson’s Ministry for the Future – being in this field myself, I think I’m more picky about these things). I appreciate that Butler focuses just as much on issues like social inequality, corporate greed, and labor. These are all interconnected, and connected to climate change as well, and I feel like I haven’t seen anyone else so effectively weave together all of these issues in a novel. It’s feels incredibly real, which makes it all the more chilling. I can’t wait to read the sequel and find out where Earthseed and Acorn evolve from here, and I’m honestly heartbroken that this series was never completed. I’m ready to read everything Butler has ever written though.

The Left Hand of Darkness is my first by Ursula K. Le Guin, and just like with Butler, I’m ready to read her entire bibliography! Remarkably forward-thinking for its time in how it views gender, it’s slightly less groundbreaking now (sometimes a little outdated even), but for 1969 this is revolutionary – just pretend the Gethenians use they/them pronouns. I’m also obsessed with the way this was written like an anthropological text; perhaps not surprising given who Le Guin’s parents were. The worldbuilding is so interesting (almost as good as Dune), and I can’t wait to read more of the Hainish cycle books.

I knew I would like Binti: The Complete Trilogy by Nnedi Okorafor, which I picked up after enjoying Noor so much last year. Like with the previous two authors mentioned, I’m planning to read everything by Okorafor. This one reads a little more YA-like than Noor, but I think the themes are a little more mature than YA books typically tackle. Binti really adeptly grapples with themes of trauma and grief, and I really enjoyed seeing how this played out, especially between the characters of Binti and Okwu. Okorafor is another master worldbuilder, and I can’t get enough of her extremely vivid settings, which feel as alive as the characters. I’m excited to read more books by Okorafor featuring strong yet flawed female protagonists.

The Devourers by Indra Das is a book I went into completely blind. I can’t even remember where I heard about this one. But I’m so glad I picked it up. Definitely not for anyone squeamish – there’s a lot of, uh… bodily fluids (among other things, including cannibalism and assault – definitely check trigger warnings before reading). I think the author might have a thing for piss. But all that aside, this book was amazing. It felt like a historical epic, carrying a single storyline flawlessly from roughly the mid-1600s to present-day India. I couldn’t put it down. This was definitely the most well-researched fiction book I read this year. Das’s writing style is so beautiful, as is the story itself, which explores what it means to be human. It sounds corny but I promise it’s not! Looking forward to reading more by Das.

I picked up Frida: The Biography of Frida Kahlo by Hayden Herrera before visiting Mexico City this year. This was such a good decision. Herrera’s biography is so well researched, and I’m amazed by how many people who were close to Kahlo she was able to interview for this book. It paints such a complete picture of Frida’s life and how it influenced her art. It’s so thorough; this book will practically make anyone who reads it into a Kahlo scholar (I will now be insufferable to anyone who goes to a Kahlo exhibit or museum with me). It really enhanced my visit to Mexico City as well; I feel like I had a much greater appreciation of and better context for her artwork that I saw in CDMX (as well as Diego Rivera’s), her and Rivera’s homes, Trotsky’s home, and even various sites around the city not directly connected to them. Since reading this book I was able to visit MoMA in NYC and see three more Kahlo paintings, including “Self-Portrait with Cropped Hair”, which literally made me cry. If you want to learn more about Frida Kahlo, this is the book to read.

Moby-Dick by Herman Melville took me by surprise. I think the experience was enhanced by reading this aloud with my partner, and there’s no way I would have ever read it otherwise. We had joked about reading Moby-Dick and somehow that joke ended up actually happening. I was shocked by how funny this book is at times. Not to mention the unintentional (or maybe mostly intentional) homoeroticism. One minute I would be laughing at the quote “Squeeze! squeeze! squeeze! all the morning long; I squeezed that sperm till I myself almost melted into it; I squeezed that sperm till a strange sort of insanity came over me” and the next I would find myself genuinely enthralled by the storytelling, which I think deserves even more credit given the fact that we all know what happens at the end. Obviously it’s not perfect. It’s a product of the 19th century. It’s racist at times. It’s long. I completely see why people don’t read this in 2023, but I think more people should give it a chance.

Howl’s Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones wasn’t my very favorite book of the year (because it's aimed at kids I think), but I still loved it – and I think it’s technically perfect, hence the 5 stars. If you love the Miyazaki movie, don’t go in expecting it to be the same, but do still read it. I think it’s even better than the movie, which I believe is the popular consensus among people who have read it, and which I think says a lot!

Least favorites

My least favorite books this year were (in order of completion): Roadside Picnic, Before the Coffee Gets Cold, and Convenience Store Woman. More thoughts below:

Roadside Picnic by Boris and Arkady Strugatsky was a big disappointment for me. I think the concept of a “roadside picnic” as it’s presented in the book by Dr. Pilman (aliens have visited earth, but only for an inconsequential stop-off, a “roadside picnic”, leaving behind what’s essentially their trash, but which is nonetheless lifechanging and incomprehensible to earthlings) is fascinating, and has so much potential. This just didn’t meet that potential for me. My biggest struggle with enjoying classic sci-fi books is the pervasive misogyny, which was definitely present here. The ending is also a bit disappointing – and abrupt. I didn’t enjoy the film (Stalker) either, but I think it does a better job getting across what I think the authors were attempting to say.

Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi has a fun, light sci-fi concept, which drew me in. The setting in a coffee shop also sounded like it might be cozy and fun. It was not fun. I wish I had done a little more research before reading this book because I hated it. The characters are boring and one-dimensional. The stories are overly sentimental and saccharine. And worst of all, I think this book is deeply misogynistic. I felt crazy after reading this because I hadn’t heard anyone else make this complaint, so I searched the internet and found someone who feels the same way and summarized it really well – here’s her blog post about it. The worst is the last story in this collection, which comes off as deeply anti-abortion and equates a woman’s happiness with giving birth (even if it literally costs her life). What the fuck do people see in this?

Convenience Store Woman by Sayaka Murata was another translated Japanese novel that was a dud for me. I want to give Murata another chance, so I still plan to read Earthlings, but she’s kind of on thin ice right now. I expected this to be an anti-work book about how it’s fine to not be career-driven, and it sort of was at times, but I feel like Murata got off track as soon as she introduced a character who is a literal incel and put him in a fake-dating situation with the protagonist. This was insufferable. There was also potential here to say something interesting about how a character who is clearly both asexual and autistic fits into a society that values marriage, reproduction, productivity, and adherence to the norm, but Murata fumbles saying anything meaningful about all of this, and verges on coming across as infantilizing and othering the main character for these characteristics.

Reading goals

Last year I identified 6 books that I hoped to read in 2023 (Convenience Store Woman, Terraform: Watch/Worlds/Burn, Before the Coffee Gets Cold, One Hundred Years of Solitude, Binti, and Roadside Picnic) and, to my surprise, I actually read all of them except for One Hundred Years of Solitude. Interestingly, only one of these books (Binti) was a favorite, and 3 of them were my least favorite books of the year. I guess it goes to show that the books I think I’m going to like don’t always end up working out for me (a good reminder for me to not buy books new if I’m not sure I’ll love them! Luckily I mainly read library books or buy used).

Here are my reading goals for 2024:

Read at least 22 books – higher than my goal for this year, but fewer than I actually ended up reading this year so it’s not too much pressure

Read more non-fiction

Read One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel García Márquez, Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir, Are Prisons Obsolete? by Angela Davis, at least one more Octavia E. Butler book, and at least one more Ursula K. Le Guin book

If you actually read this whole post, thanks for listening to my ramblings! I'd love to hear what your favorite books of 2023 were, or if you agree or disagree with any of my book opinions.

My list of books for 2023

All the books I read in 2023 (in order of date finished):

The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. Le Guin*

Roadside Picnic by Boris and Arkady Strugatsky

Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi

Labyrinths: Selected Stories and Other Writings by Jorge Luis Borges*

Thrawn: Alliances (Thrawn #2) by Timothy Zahn

Life in the Universe: A Beginner’s Guide by Lewis Dartnell

Star Wars: From the Adventures of Luke Skywalker by George Lucas Alan Dean Foster

Azumanga Daioh: The Omnibus by Kiyohiko Azuma*

Mexican Gothic by Silvia Moreno-Garcia

Howl’s Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones

Frankenstein by Mary Shelley

Parable of the Sower by Octavia E. Butler

Binti: The Complete Trilogy (Binti #1–3) by Nnedi Okorafor

The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde

The Summer Book by Tove Jansson

Dracula by Bram Stoker

Frida: The Biography of Frida Kahlo by Hayden Herrera

Thrawn: Treason (Thrawn #3) by Timothy Zahn

My Pretty Vampire by Katie Skelly

Legends and Lattes by Travis Baldree

Moby-Dick: Or, the Whale by Herman Melville

Convenience Store Woman by Sayaka Murata

The Fervor by Alma Katsu

The Devourers by Indra Das

The Glass Menagerie by Tennessee Williams

The Broken Spears: The Aztec Account of the Conquest of Mexico by Miguel León-Portilla

Terraform: Watch/Worlds/Burn edited by Claire L Evans and Brian Merchant

Star Wars: From a Certain Point of View: Return of the Jedi by [too many authors to list]**

*started reading in 2022

**still reading; not counted towards the number of books read in 2023

[popblank]

Year-end personal goals and culture roundup for 2022:

I deliberately set no personal goals out of laziness and also to see what would happen. What happened was a mixed bag: 

Did not exercise basically all year

Was less politically engaged than in previous election years

Read fewer books than expected

Did maintain a 300+ day streak in Duolingo, with the help of many streak freezes

Worked a lot of extra hours

Saw a lot of theater

This year I think I will set some sort of health goal because the lack of exercise (and poor sleep habits) made themselves pretty apparent toward the end of the year.

Culture stuff

Theater:

Went back to my pre-pandemic habits and saw 23 unique shows (plus a few repeats). Individual posts are linked; for ones where I didn’t write a post it was probably because I didn’t have the time or energy.

Everybody’s Talking About Jamie

Slave Play

Assassins

The Lehman Trilogy

Hadestown

Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?

Tootsie

Aida

King James

Pretty Woman

Come From Away

Lempicka

Moulin Rouge

Dear Evan Hansen

The Prom

+ More thoughts on The Prom

Oklahoma!

Jagged Little Pill

To Kill A Mockingbird

Omar

2:22: A Ghost Story

Invincible

Clyde's

Bat Out Of Hell

Music:

It is the first time in a while that my most-listened to song has not been from Eurovision or Melodifestivalen. I am finding that if I don’t make an effort to listen to music, I don’t listen to music, which is disappointing.  In any case, my most listened to track appears to have been Tove Styrke’s 2020 cover of “Bara du och jag” from Så mycket bättre season 11.  (My most-played Eurovision song was “Með hækkandi sól” by Systur, which ended up around #3 overall.)

Television:

Supergirl S1 (yes I am still trying to finish Season 2)

The Great American Barbecue Showdown (unexpectedly engaging)

The Great British Baking Show/GBBO S13 (liked the contestants, still puzzled by the taco technical)

The Midnight Club (not especially scary or horrifying, which is fine since I am not typically into horror; even so this has got me interested in Mike Flanagan’s other work)

Street Food: USA (apparently food holds my attention well)

Andor S1 (as good as everyone says)

Kalifat (compelling, also a bit depressing and cynical)

Movies:

Not much of a year for movie-watching since I spent so much time on live theater. Of the things I saw that were released this year, I think there was only Avatar 2 and Glass Onion. Might rewatch Glass Onion if there’s a commentary available.

Books:

Sprinting Through No Man’s Land: Endurance, Tragedy, and Rebirth in the 1919 Tour de France by Adin Dobkin: First book I managed to finish this year and it wasn’t until late August. Knew basically nothing about the Tour de France but this felt like part history and part travelogue, which kept me interested.

The Future is History: How Totalitarianism Reclaimed Russia by Masha Gessen: Listened to on audio, does provide some context for the current war in Ukraine, though history of Russia prior to 1980s or so remains a large gap in my knowledge

Less by Andrew Sean Greer: Essentially a bit of a slow-burn romantic comedy, fun airplane read

Brown Girl in the Ring by Nalo Hopkinson: dystopia + magic, good combo; very specific location (post-apocalyptic Toronto) is also good 

[serpenttailedangel]

Thinking out loud on fan response vs book sales

Been doing a lot of reviewing various books I’ve read over the years for research purposes, and I noticed a few things listed a best sellers that seems so... flashpoint? Like when the Oscars awards a movie that ends up being remembered as an example how the Oscars are bad at picking movies that match the public conscience. The advertising for the book calls it a best seller, but almost all the discussion I can find around it on social media is limited to the year it released. A lot of the posts on it are people announcing it’s the next book they’re going to read rather than theorizing about or reacting to the content. There’s virtually no fanart. Only one or two fanfics. The book came, apparently sold well, and then went without seeming to leave a huge impact. Maybe I’m looking in the wrong places. Maybe my perception of what the average book fandom typically look like is skewed by my time in fandoms for other forms of media that produce steadier streams of canon material. The books still collect new reviews on Goodreads, but it just seems like people largely moved on without much discussion ever stirring around these titles.

That is, first off, terrifying. I would hate to get excited if any book I ever published was declared a hit, only to fade without ever showing signs of having inspired others to create, and while seeming to leave no lasting impact on the public conscience. It’s not like I think my writing is on par with Tolkien and I’m going to reshape the fantasy space as people know it, but I’d like to see a few people show that my book left an impact on them beyond giving them a decent means of killing a few hours. The idea of pouring my heart and soul into a story and working hard to break into publishing only for my first book to be irrelevant by the time I finish the second is one of those fears that sometimes just hits me like a truck. I would rather have juuuust good enough sales to convince publishers to buy a second manuscript from me while also producing a story that sparks a modest fandom over hit sales but no evidence that anyone actually cared about what they read. To me, having my characters and world be so loved that it inspires other to create with them and theorize about their lives in the same way I do is more valuable than making enough off of writing to be able to quit my day job.

But also... I’ve seen that happen. My favorite book series got canceled mid-story for not meeting sales goals and the author had to self-publish to finish it. You could find more fan theories, fics, and art for it in all the years where the story was in limbo than I’ve been able to find for some of these best sellers in the same genre. Many of these best sellers that didn’t seem to spark a social media response, I would classify as being about as well written as my fave, and most have tropes that seem more popular in the general market.

I’m trying to figure out what causes this. I know best seller lists are very rigged and often cheated for advertising purposes. It does make a little part of me wonder if artificially boosted sales didn’t play a part. But I’ve personally read some of these books and they had enough popular sauce to seem like they could organically do well in the YA market, especially when their publishers spent marketing money to let more people find those titles in the first place. Perhaps doing something that’s got more popular sauce makes you compete more for fandom and memorability with all the other popular sauce books, while something that fills a niche with fewer overall customers can amass more discussion because its readers have fewer titles in that niche to split their focus between. I’ve certainly seen, say, some author have a preferred character archetype, where I’ve noticed myself just not getting into Character C because Character B was the author’s best realization of said archetype. I could see the same thing being applied on a whole-book level.

[backlogbooks]

"read books I own" six months update (halfway through the year! wow!)

books read off my physical tbr: 30

current status of the tbr: 39

We've made it under forty books! And I think it'll stay that way--I don't have any plans to buy more books in the near future, and I won't get my next preorder in until July (I was a teenage slasher by Stephen Graham Jones, for the curious), and I'll definitely have finished a couple books before it comes in

I'm having a really good time with this goal! So far most of my tbr reading has been horror that I've gotten in the past couple of years and really been looking forward to, and niche nonfiction that I picked up on a whim and am finally actually reading. I do have some other genres mixed in, which I'm looking forward to, especially now that I've taken off some of the books that I'm no longer interested in and I have a better idea of what still appeals to me. (Shoutout to everyone who voted in my "read or give away" polls, I did tilt the scale in favor of giving away by making that option the much more fun "throw it to the wolves" lmao)

I have had to do check ins to make sure I'm more focused on the reading and enjoying than I am with the number going down. I've gotten rid of the overall reading goal in the past few years, so this has been the only stat I can focus on--as much as I love playing with my tbr spreadsheet and moving things from the "tbr" to the "read" section, I don't want to get wrapped up entirely in that. Part of that is letting myself/encouraging myself to read the longer books on my shelf, which are well worth the investment--I just finished Plain Bad Heroines, and I'm looking at Mary by Nat Cassidy in the near future! (Though that might wait until I've had a chance to read Carrie by Stephen King, since I'm pretty sure it was an inspiration and I'd love to see those connections.)

As I noted in another post, my book buying goal has expanded, so that instead of trying to buy only 12 books this year, I'm aiming for 24 or fewer. This was partially because this year I've been reading the books I buy pretty close to when I buy them, so I feel better about the purchase. So my update on the book buying front is that I've bought 15 books total, 4 of which I've since read and 3 of which I'd already read when I bought them. Book buying is gonna slow down again, with the next spike probably coming around the end of October (I'm already looking ahead to my library's annual book sale, I just can't help it.)

See y'all in two months for the next installment lol

"read books i own" two months in update:

Books read off my physical tbr: 6

Current status of my tbr: 60

feeling pretty good about this! if i keep going at this rate i'll end the year with 30 books on my shelf, but honestly i think i can do a little more since after this semester i'll have a little more freedom with what i read

Looking forward to swapping my horror and tbr shelves, because my horror collection is outgrowing its little corner, and I want to get out of the habit of buying books i havent read yet so my tbr can live in the little corner instead

[treybriggsthewriter]

This makes me nervous, but I’m going to post it. I’m going to try my best to achieve my goals. I’ve put in a ton of work already, so I’m looking for additional help. 

From the campaign:

My name is Trey Briggs, and I'm a black woman who writes paranormal horror, speculative fiction, and other types of fiction. You can find my stories at MaybeTrey , Astrid the Devil , and on Instagram , Medium , and Wattpad .

My stories are aimed at black people who want to read dark stories that focus on original black characters that are complex and interesting. I genuinely believe Black audiences deserve a variety of genres to delve into, and I want to introduce them to paranormal horror, dark romance, and fantasy that they haven't gotten enough of in the past. I also believe that this can be done across multiple mediums, and I spend my money with black creative professionals to make these experiences extend beyond my words. For the last two years, I've run my stories on sites and Instagram to great reception. I like to craft complex experiences that offer looks at character backgrounds, side and backstories, full websites for each title, and more. I also provide encyclopedias, maps, audio journals, and other ways to get into each world. During these last few years, I've run into a lot of walls, jumped a lot of hurdles, and tried my best. I've worked with amazing black artists, voice actors, and actresses, musicians, designers, and more. I trust my ability to run a project, especially when it comes to planning and finding talent. My overall goal is to run a team of black creatives that crafts novels, graphic novels, audio experiences, and animated series for a dedicated audience.

Why I Need Help Long story short: I have the skill, I have the marketing/website building/business experience, and I have the drive. There's a lot I can do on my own, but there's also a lot that gets left behind because I don't have the money I need to proceed at a steady pace. I need help with funding so I can focus, hire the right people, and craft these stories the way they deserve to be crafted. I have thus far spent over $60,000 of my own money on my projects over the past two years - the writing and site-building are easy for me; the rest has to be hired out. I have art, site costs for hosting, domains, templates, specific plugins, and maintenance, audio (and vocal artists to pay), musical, and editing costs. I'm by no means rich or even particularly financially stable. I have taken on tons of extra clients for my digital marketing business, transcribed hundreds of hours of audio for dirt cheap, and taken out personal loans. I even worked a second full-time job along with my full-time business last year to afford to produce the content I love. It's starting to take a toll on my mental health. I plan on continuing to fund these projects out of pocket (and finding ways to do so), but having financial help, however big or small, would allow me to move a lot faster and with less stress. It would let me flesh out ideas and concepts that I have had to scrap because I can only physically handle so much extra work. I run a full-time marketing business from home, homeschool my autistic 10-year-old, and generally have a busy life. Some of the strain is taking a toll on me, and I don't want to give up. Having some financial backing could allow me to drop a client or two after a few months and focus on the work I love to do.

How You Can Help I mainly need a start—a sort of base. I want to emphasize that I plan to continue to provide the main bulk of funding for my projects. I know my goals are ambitious, and I know each step will take time and money. I welcome any help to make the process smoother and to get around the initial hurdles. I'd like to have ebooks and novels offered on my site by the end of the year (along with the free serials and stories). Funding means that I can broaden the projects, include more free aspects to my sites, and secure direct financing through sales of ebooks and audiobooks sooner. It also means that I can offer MORE stories, whether they are online only or fully fleshed out novels and sites. I am swamped with trying to work enough to cover all my bills and creative projects, so I lose a lot of time I could spend plotting and writing. If I have better funding, I can get my stories out quicker (and with fewer mistakes).

The Initial Stories Let's talk about my stories! If you're familiar with my work already, you can skip to the next section. My main story site is Maybe Trey . Currently, I have two big titles and a bunch of smaller ones that I am seeking help with funding: Astrid the Devil

Astrid the Devil is the complicated story of a girl who inherits not only her family's features and DNA, but their fears, struggles, and fights. It's the story of a condition called Devil Syndrome, the women who suffer it, and the monsters that devour them. It's the story of the fight to save the people you love at the expense of innocent lives. At its core, Astrid the Devil is the story of a woman who inherits the chaos of three generations before her. It's a look at what is truly passed down to our children, and how they're left to fight our battles in the aftermath of our failures. It's the tale of an indescribable monster and the women who struggle to defeat it. It's a journey into how their every decision could save or destroy an entire world. Astrid the Devil is the story of Astrid Snow, but her story can't be told without the story of the women before her.

Vicious: On MaybeTrey  and The Vicious site (in progress)

Somewhere, a war is brewing.  That's the only thing that's for sure to Junnie Gorton, a young horned girl suffering from a debilitating disease called Horn Rot. She typically dealt with her low survival rate and abnormally large horns by escaping the world with her best friend, Lewish. Now she's forced to figure out which side is which, save her entire species, and find out the truth behind the sudden uprising in her home. Horn Rot, a highly contagious and violent disease spreading through horned people, is causing mass amounts of madness and death. Normal horns grow in ways that will pierce, suffocate, and maim their owners, and the only one who can stop it is Junnie's mother, Lyria. As Lyria falls deeper and deeper into an anti-social revolt, the country reels. While Junnie broods, her entire species must prepare for mass extinction. Her brother plots with a group of people with less than good intentions and Lewish is quieter than usual. In a civilization brought up on extreme violence and competition, Junnie and Lewish try their best not to get swallowed by their culture, their lives, or their horns.

Bunni and Bosque :

Bunni lives. Bosque dies. We all know how this story starts. Bunni is obsessed with destruction and death. She comes from the healthiest Horned family in her country. She's from the oldest, purest bloodline in the world. And she's bored with it. Bunni spends most of her time trying to escape her duties as a pureblood. She wants things dirty, messy, foul, inconsistent. Having parents that are willing to kill to keep their bloodline pure is annoying. Knowing that she'll live a long, full life, produce more perfect children, and die unscathed is agonizing. Bunni wants something to mourn. We all know how this story ends. Bosque is destined to die an agonizing death, alone on his family's land. He's watched everyone he loved and grew up with perish. Sometimes it was because of their disease. Sometimes it was because of the malice and hatred of others. While he's absolutely withdrawn and satisfied with his life, Bosque has never had a chance to live it. He spends his days basking in the sun, bathing in wood baths, and contemplating the end. Bosque isn't interested in joining the rest of the world. He'd rather die out, alone, where his family belonged. Bosque wants to go peacefully. But neither expected to meet each other one day in a supermarket. Neither expected to fall in love, lust, and every vicious and dirty thing between. Neither expected to be so right for each other, all while being wrong for everyone else. You know the end of this story. Bunni lives, Bosque dies. But maybe something will change.

My smaller titles, Bunni and Bosque /Aite and Jude, can be found at Maybe Trey .

The Business Plan

The initial phase of my business plan is to get the sites populated with ebooks and audiobooks for sale. I also have prints that can be sold. Right now, I am in the audience-building phase while I save up for editing the full novels. 

In terms of an actual business with which to publish the stories, I already have a registered publication company in Illinois: Wolfless Studios LLC. I took this step earlier this year with plans to self-publish Astrid and Vicious. So that is paid for and done.

I have also gotten initial editing done on the first six chapters of Astrid, though it will need to be edited from the beginning again once everything is said and done. I've spent over $1000 on that so far, and it would go a lot faster if I didn't need to save up to edit each chapter.

Astrid the Devil is fully plotted, outlined, and only needs the last three chapters. Bunni and Bosque and Vicious are newer, but plotted and already deep into character development (all being shared across social and Wattpad for audience growth). Aite and Jude and other shorts are plotted, and three other unshared stories are plotted and at the editing phase.

Other costs and ways I would use the funding (I would still put in my own money and do as much on my own as possible):

Initial $30K

$6000 - $7000 Line and Copy edits for Astrid (currently at 250000+ words/expecting over 300000 at $0.02 rate)

$6000 - $7000 Line and Copy Edits for Vicious

$3000 - $4000 Line and Copy Edits for Bunni and Bosque

ISBN Purchases (Separate ISBN for each format for each book) - https://www.myidentifiers.com/identify-protect-your-book/barcode

Covers for Astrid/Vicious/B&B Print Versions

Site Hosting Costs and Maintenance for 2 Years

Site completion for all stories

Initial store and app development

40K - Marketing and Graphic Novels

Social, Print, and Web ads

Email Marketing Campaigns 

Booths at Decatur Book Festival (depending on COVID)

Social ads and promos

50 to 60 pages

First two chapters offered as free promo with email sign-ups

Audio journals for each character

Situational audio journals

Encyclopedia for Astrid (finishing up)/Vicious

65K - Hires and Next Phases

Ability to hire a Full-Time Editor 

Audio Series for each (professionally done)

Vicious Graphic Novel

Additional Title Added

Short animations for both Vicious and Astrid (with plans to fund more with book sales)

Fleshed out Story Sections (Novellas for each character of each series)

Short comic series with Astrid and Vicious side characters

Possible to plan out monthly subscription service with new stories and 'story package' deliveries

75K -

Astrid the Devil Graphic Novel

Vicious Graphic Novel

Astrid the Devil Animated Short

Ability to hire part-time Web Developer

Additional bigger title

Anything Over - I ascend into pure light. And also, I can add titles, cover more mediums, and eventually expand my publishing to other black creatives.

From there, I should be able to handle the funding via sales of books, comics, audio, and more. Again, I will always offer mostly free content across the sites.

I believe in proof of concept, and I have diehard fans on my social platforms. With no outside funding, I've been able to a lot on my own. I'd love to expand my business into one that does the same for other black authors, artists, voice actors, and animators somewhere down the line. 

Thank you so much for your consideration. I appreciate all my readers, present and future, and I appreciate any help!

See incentives and more on the actual campaign: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-trey-publish-black-paranormal-horror-stories

Thank you so much!

[readingaway]

Mid Year Book Freakout Tag

Stolen from @ninja-muse, this was a good distraction for a few minutes

How many books have you read so far?

126; fewer than I wanted to have read but there’s a lot of extenuating circumstances and reading must take a back seat to everything else. A few have been re-reads like Dance of Thieves, Red White & Royal Blue, the first three books of An Ember in the Ashes, and I will get to re-reading We Hunt the Flame in the next few weeks. 

What genres have you read?

A decent mix, I think. It’s still somehow dominated by fantasy and YA (or YA fantasy), but I’ve gotten in quite a few other genres like contemporary/ adult literary fiction, historical fiction, romance, sci-fi, classics, and some nonfiction, poetry, short stories, and graphic novels. 

Best books you’ve read so far in 2021:

Not counting re-reads -

Saga by Brian K. Vaughan and Fiona Staples (book 3 hurt so much)

Why Be Happy When You Could Be Normal? by Jeanette Winterson

A Memory of Light by Brandon Sanderson & Robert Jordan 

Men at Arms by Terry Pratchett (my favorite Discworld novel so far)

The ABC Murders by Agatha Christie

The Color Purple by Alice Walker

New Spring by Robert Jordan

The Emigrants by W.G. Sebald (was a bit hard to read but the flow and the emotional pull)

The Lives of Christopher Chant and Witch Week by Diana Wynne Jones (I’ve discovered that when I’m in a slump - usually because my reading has been too depressing or dry I just have to pick up a Jones or a Pratchett to fix things)

A Sky Beyond the Storm by Sabaa Tahir (I mean, I thought I was upset by certain things but then I checked the tagged posts on here and realized I’m normal, actually)

Spindle’s End by Robin McKinley

Curses are for Cads by Tamara Berry

The Goddess Chronicle by Natsuo Kirino

The Box in the Woods by Maureen Johnson

The Valley and the Flood by Rebecca Mahoney

The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet by Becky Chambers

Cures for Heartbreak by Margo Rabb

The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver

Best sequel you’ve read so far in 2021:

Uh, I’m gonna go with The Box in the Woods even though it’s not quite a sequel, it is connected to the main series

New release you haven’t read yet, but want to:

Lucky Girl by Jamie Pacton, Delicates by Brenna Thummler, Lucy Clark Will Not Apologize by Margo Rabb, and Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir. There’s a few more but these are the ones I’m most anxious to get to.

Most anticipated release for the second half of the year:

I’m very excited for A Snake Falls to Earth by Darcie Little Badger, Vespertine by Margaret Rogerson, Hypnosis is for Hacks by Tamara Berry, and The Winners by Fredrik Backman - the intended release date is unclear but it looks like it should be out in English in November/ December but might be pushed to next year. (On that note, I am still waiting for The Winds of Winter and The Thorn of Emberlain.)

Biggest disappointment:

Ace by Angela Chen was well put together but nothing earth-shattering or even that affirming for me. I keep myself sheltered from discrimination so I don’t face the stuff that people in the stories related faced, nor is it like I’ve never heard of asexuality before. 

In terms of books I think were just bad, Coyote America by Dan Flores was a flop; it looked like it might be pretty informative and some parts of it were, but there were so many assumptions and presumptions, as well as poor argumentation, that it threw everything else the author was claiming into question. Brideshead Revisited and A Handful of Dust, both by Evelyn Waugh were also big disappointments, out of all the classics I’ve read so far this year they were both boring, stale duds in which nothing interesting happened at all and the narrative voice was even more boring and grating. 

Biggest surprise:

Um, The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver. I thought it would be iffy but it was... it flowed well and highlighted the differences between the women and had such emotional depth and also drew so much attention to patriarchal religious structures and patriarchy in general. 

Favorite new author (debut or new to you):

Ooh, I’ve read quite a few debut novels - mostly middle grade since I’ve been reading a lot of middle grade since my own novel project falls somewhere between middle grade and YA and I want to study the story types and narrative styles and I like how they’re written much more clearly than YA and adult books and yet typically have great emotional depth. So for most notable debut authors I liked Rebecca Mahoney and Nora Shalaway Carpenter. In new to me authors, Rachel Maddow, Tillie Walden, and Natuso Kirino all have other books that I’m now interested in checking out. Actually I have one of Tillie Walden’s other books next to me right now.

Underrated gems:

I’m going to say Spindle’s End, The Goddess Chronicle, The Valley and the Flood, Cures for Heartbreak, the Chrestomanci series by Diana Wynne Jones, Sia Martinez and the Moonlit Beginning of Everything by Raquel Vasquez Gilliland, Black Flamingo by Dean Atta, The Midwich Cuckoos by John Wyndham (a classic horror/ sci-fi novel), and The Thirty Names of Night by Zeyn Joukhadar

Newest fictional crush:

Was gonna say “don’t have any” but one could say that I love Marko in Saga (they draw him with such a strong jawline and he wears armor and has beautiful ram horns; bearded Marko was peak Marko) and Eleanor Wilde in Tamara Berry’s Eleanor Wilde mystery series might count.

Newest favorite characters:

the crew in Saga and Ashby in The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet stick out but really, I loved a lot of characters this year.

Book that made you cry:

Jumping Off Swings by Jo Knowles, Love & Olives by Jenna Evans Welch, and The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid leap to mind

Book that made you happy:

Aside from the ones I already listed, The Transatlantic Book Club by Felicity-Hayes McCoy

Most beautiful book cover of a book you’ve read so far this year:

Oh but there’s quite a few! Like The Pull of the Stars, the vintage classics copy of Orlando, The Go-Between, The Valley and the Flood 

How are you doing with your year’s goals?

Well I didn’t make any official goals aside from my overall reading goal of 200 books, which I’m doing well on. I might up it to 250 but I’m not sure how demanding fall semester is going to be yet. Aside from that I just have vague goals to push my boundaries and read as diversely as possible - not just with things like #ownvoices books but in genre, all the different categories, as well. That’s going pretty well.

What books do you need to read by the end of the year?

SO MANY. I can’t give a list because there is no way to keep it concise.

Tagging: @softironman, @she-wolf-of-highgarden, @motherofkittens94 and anyone who wants to do it.

[seventhstar]

End of Year Reading Tag, which I am doing because I feel like it. You know how people will say "consider yourself tagged if you see this?" @why-the-heck-not I am taking you up on your offer.

did you reach your reading goal for the year (if you had one)?

I did! Actually I met my goal multiple times. I started with a goal of 50, hit it well before 2021 was over, and raised it a couple more times. My final goal was 85, and I ended up reading 88 books!

what are your top 3 books you read this year?

Oof, that is a hard question, because I already put out my top ten list this year and even with counting series I read as one book, I struggled hard to cut it down to ten. I'll give it a shot...

Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir The Jasmine Throne by Tasha Suri When the Tiger Came Down the Mountain by Nghi Vo

what’s a book that you didn’t expect to enjoy quite so much going in?

Hmm. Mexican Gothic, by Silvia Moreno-Garcia, for the simple reason that I don't usually read horror. I picked this up on a whim and enjoyed it a lot, to the point where I'm going to try to be more open-minded about horror as a genre in the future.

were there any books that didn’t live up to your expectations?

My biggest disappointments this year were Jade Fire Gold by June CL Tan and Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas. These were both YA novels--actually, a lot of books I didn't like this year were YA, which makes me think I need to read fewer YA novels--that didn't work for me and overall didn't live up to the massive hype surrounding them.

did you reread any old faves? If so, which one was your favourite?

I reread shockingly few books this year! But I would have to go with Hogfather by Terry Pratchett, which I reread every December, and which is one of my favorite books ever. It is full of moments that have lingered in my brain since I read them, like smoke in a candle if you smother it by putting on a lid.

did you dnf any books?

Three! The Duke's Wager by Edith Layton, because both the love interests were loathsome and I did not like either of them enough to continue; Daring and the Duke, because I didn't like the first couple chapters; and Freed by E.L. James, because after reading the first five 50sog books, my friends finally convinced me to love myself and stop.

did you read any books outside your usual preferred genre(s)?

This year actually marked my return to my preferred genres, fantasy and science fiction. Though I did read a lot more adult SF/F compared to YA. I did read more contemporary romances, which was a change--I usually only read historical romances and usually only ones set in regency England.

what was your predominant format this year?

43/88 books I read were e-books, the remaining 45 were physical. I read a lot of library books in the first half of the year and then switched to e-books once I was traveling.

what’s the longest book you read this year?

Probably the fan translation of Heaven Official's Blessing, which is fiendishly long.

what are your top 3 anticipated 2022 releases?

Okay, I'm going to cheat and do three new releases and three sequels to books I've already read.

New releases: Daughter of the Moon Goddess by Sue Lynn Tan A Taste of Gold and Iron by Alexandra Rowland The Way Spring Arrives and Other Stories edited by Yu Chen and Regina Kanyu Wang

Sequels: Nona the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir Into the Riverlands by Nghi Vo The Oleander Sword by Tasha Suri

what books from your tbr did you not get to this year, but are excited to read in 2022?

Well, I'd like to finish the two series I started in 2022 that I didn't finish. So Act Your Age, Eve Brown by Talia Hibbert and The Hellion's Waltz by Olivia Waite.

In addition: The Lady or the Lion by Aamna Qureshi (Pakistani-inspired fantasy!!!) The Councillor by E.J. Beaton (I bought two copies of this one and didn't get around to it!!!) The Charm Offensive by Alison Cochrun (I wanted to read it but couldn't bring myself to buy it, but then it went on sale recently so now I have it!)

[nordic-language-love]

2020 Language Goal Review

Given tomorrow is technically week 1 of 2021, I figured now would be a good time to review my 2020 goals. I actually kinda scrapped them because I decided they were too vague and I didn’t even care about them really, but I thought I’d do a review anyway.

My 2020 goals were:

Improve my confidence with both speaking and writing (particularly speaking)

Finish reading all the books I currently have

Write 5000 10000 words of fiction in Norwegian (not necessarily all the same story)

Overall aim: pull all my skills up to a comfortable B2 level and test this by taking Norskprøve B1/B2 in Autumn or Winter

So, here’s how I feel I did!

1. This was vague af and I figured it’s impossible to measure, but actually, there are two things that attest to the fact I nailed this:

I happily write more posts in Norwegian, and sometimes I don’t even proofread them (and then have to go back and fix various dumb mistakes, but I’ve noticed those are getting fewer and fewer. Anyway, the point is, my confidence has improved)

I took up @hopehav on her offer to chat with me in Norwegian after literally years of going nOOOoo I am not Worthy

I also feel like if someone asked me if I speak Norwegian this time last year, my answer would have been “ehh I kinda understand it but I don’t really speak it”. Whereas now it’s more like “yes but not well/fluently”. I think that’s probably an upgrade!

2. I’ve still not read Harry Potter og Føniksordenen. But I did read Harry Potter og De Vises Stein (which I found free online) and another book that I didn’t have at the start of the year. Combined, they’re about the same number of pages as Harry Potter og Føniksordenen. So, in a way, I did actually hit this goal.

3. Yeahhh sorta smashed this one. I’m currently on 14.3K, plus another 1000 words of a translated WIP and 1000 words of planning. True, I don’t write anything particularly complicated or difficult, but I had fun!

4. Honestly idk what CEFR level I am atm and I’m not even sure I care. I feel like I’m closer to B2 now than B1 now, and I feel like my reading skills at least are close-ish to C1. I’ve been told a number of times I’m not as far off C1 as I think I am, but I’m not convinced lol. Obviously I didn’t get to take the test because of corona, but maybe next year I’ll do it, just to prove to myself that I’m at least B2. We’ll see though - it depends where in the world I am and what my finances are like.

2021 Goals?

I have some ideas for some goals, but I know they’ll probably change as my plans change. I’m still hoping to get a job teaching English abroad. I’d love to go to Japan, which will mean studying Japanese more intensively and maintaining Norwegian rather than trying to improve for a bit. If I can’t get a job in Japan, I might have to apply for jobs in a European country, and of course I’d then want to learn the language of the country I’d be going to live in. But then, I might not go abroad at all, and then I’d just continue learning Norwegian and probably Japanese for a while at least.

I’ll probably make a post outlining some goals in time for the 31st, but they certainly won’t be set in stone!

[hopefulfestivaltastemaker]

November 1, 2020

My weekly roundup of things I am up to. Topics include another update on my recovery, the Rare Earth Hypothesis, materials for renewable energy, climate change and dust clouds, and visions of the future revisited.

Update on Recovery IV

This past week has been good. My bedtime is moving later, now about 11:00, and I am down to 10 hours of sleep the past day. My “normal” is about 2:00 to 3:00 AM bedtime and 9 hours of sleep, so I am getting close to normal. I’ll have to decide if I want to hold back the late bedtime or go back to the way I was. I have a feeling it will be the latter. I’ve been taking fewer naps during the day as well.

I also got back to Urban Cruise Ship research, which was my main work duty before the stroke. Although I am not to full hours yet, I am back to the full range of job duties. There will be more on that following.

I am also planning on going back to the Orenco Station apartment this coming weekend. In the meantime my main goal is to get hold of the neurosurgery department at Kaiser, ask a few questions, and possibly refill one of the medications I am taking. Kaiser has been good for the most part, but I am getting frustrated with the amount of phone tag I have to do with them to get things done.

So far my total expense for the stroke has been $7900, which is exactly the same as my copay. I shudder to think how much it would be without the copay, but that’s what I’m paying for with insurance. I’m not sure if the copay covers what I spent at RIO; if not, then I have more expense coming. Still, the total expense has been less than I feared.

Rare Earth Hypothesis

This past week I read Ward and Brownlee’s Rare Earth book (freebie here). It’s a science classic, which had a major effect on how we think about the question of commonality of life throughout the universe, and it is a fascinating and accessible read. I recommend taking a look, especially to anyone interested in knowing more about Earth history.

That said, I do have a few modest criticisms of the book. Even though it was pitched at a general audience, I would have appreciated some more quantification of the likelihood of various events. For example, the authors assert at one point that an Earth analogue could no longer form because there isn’t enough uranium and thorium left to drive place tectonics. That may be true, but I think they should have provided the numbers on such a statement, as it is far from obviously true. There is a chapter dedicated to calculating the odds, but they offer an equation (analogous to the Drake Equation) without trying to fill in numbers. In the end, I am left with the sense that the Rare Earth Hypothesis is just that, a hypothesis, but not a quantitative statement.

A few elements of the book have not aged well. They make a few assertions about exoplanets in particular which have proven false. Ward and Brownlee assert that Earthlike planets (here defined narrowly as rocky planets roughly the size of Earth, orbiting a star roughly the size of the Sun, in the habitable zone) should be rare, but we now know from expolanet observation that such planets are almost as common as stars in the Milky Way. This point isn’t critical to the book, but it does make me wish there was an update. In the next few years, we should find from the James Webb telescope how common oxygen atmospheres are around Earthlike planets. If they’re common, that will refute another element of the Rare Earth Hypothesis, and if rare or non-existent, it would confirm an element.

My own thinking falls into line with the Rare Earth Hypothesis. My guess is that microbial life is common but “advanced” (plants and animal) life, let alone intelligence, is so rare that we should not expect to find it with present techniques. The book confirms that thinking. The main argument against the hypothesis, and Ward and Brownlee’s thesis, is that they only look at advanced life on Earth and thus ignore the myriad other pathways by which it may have arisen. That may be, but it is my sense that advocates of a common life thesis make many unprovable assertions of how life may have arisen.

In any event, it is an exciting time for astrobiology. The next few decades should give us some more answers, from James Webb and other sources. I’m very much looking forward to that.

Materials for Renewable Energy

Speaking on things that are supposedly rare, I got back to my Urban Cruise Ship work by looking at rare-Earth elements and other elements that may be barriers to renewable energy expansion.

My own sense, and I cited a couple sources to this effect, is that it won’t be a barrier. There are in fact barriers to a 100% renewable future, but availability of elements shouldn’t be one of them. I think it will be like the fears of platinum shortages when the catalytic converter was mandated. There was a temporary supply crunch, but then supply expanded to meet demand.

I think the same will happen with Rare Earths and other elements critical to renewable energy and electric vehicles. Modeling suggests that we will need about four times the Lithium and Cobalt, and several times the Neodymium and Dysprosium as well for permanent magnets for wind turbines. Miners should step up to the plate and provide what we need, and probably without the geopolitical conflict that some are fearing.

I didn’t look at every element that people are worried about. Copper, which especially will be needed for an expansion of transmission capacity, could be an issue as well.

Climate Change and Dust Clouds

My funder raised a question when I talked with him last: what role, if any, do interstellar dust cloud play in past ice ages? He noted that this was a common question, raised by Carl Sagan and others, back in the 1970s and 1980s but not one that we hear often now. To my knowledge, no one has confirmed or debunked the dust cloud/ice age question, so what is the present state of knowledge, and how relevant could dust clouds be for future climate predictions?

To be clear, I’m not questioning here the scientific view that the main cause of contemporary global warming is accumulation of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere. It would be my guess, though, that part of the reason for the fall-off of the dust cloud hypothesis is the perceived need to elevate CO2′s role and diminish the role of other factors, even in far past climate change.

That said, there is some relevant recent research. My friend Nick pointed out this paper from last year which posits that the breakup of an asteroid may have been a cause behind the snowball Earth event of the Ordovician. There is also this paper from 2005, arguing a similar thing.

The funder’s interest is specifically about future climate change, and whether it would be worthwhile to send small probes from the Earth to scout extraterrestrial dust for the purposes of predicting future climate change. I would also therefore want to know how fast dust clouds could operate, and what (if anything) is known about our nearby cosmic atmosphere.

Visions of the Future Revisited

Last week I mentioned three categories of the future as envisioned. My friend Nick again emailed me to mention that there is a much broader range of categories to be considered. In particular, when considering scope, we shouldn’t just think about human population but also think about distribution, e.g. on Earth and in space. One could imagine a future where human numbers are vastly extended beyond Earth, but on Earth shrunk to levels required merely to maintain monuments. Sustainability visions too often combine a reduced human population with greatly increased standards of living. For reasons I won’t belabor here, I think such a future is unlikely, but it is what many envision will happen and work toward.

As far as “scope” is concerned, there are several variables. Human humans and geographic extension (e.g. whether in space) are two of them. Overall technological prowess is another variable. Such variables are correlated but distinct.

Anyway, I wrote that section fairly quickly and meant it to be simple. Having a 2X2 matrix of scope and scale is simple, while hiding much of the complexity within those two variables.

[libertyreads]

April Wrap Up--

What an absolutely insane month April has been. I read 5,013 pages across 15 books. This has been my best reading month so far this year which also makes it my worst reading month in terms of my 2023 reading goals. My goal was to read fewer books this year since I was feeling so much pressure to read. But at this pace I’ll end up reading 150 books by the time all things are said and done. I’m just impressed by the page count since I read so many chunky books. And I’m still not feeling the same amount of pressure that I was feeling at this point last year.

Comics/Graphic Novels-- 1. The Me You Love in the Dark by Skottie Young-- 3.5 stars.

2. Lobster is the Best Medicine by Liz Climo-- 5 stars.

3. Milk and Mocha: Our Little Happiness by Melani Sie (NetGalley)-- 4 stars.

Novellas/Short Stories-- 1. When We Were Very Young by A.A. Milne-- 2 stars.

2. Now We Are Six by A.A. Milne-- 2 stars.

3. East of the Sun and West of the Moon: Old Tales from the North by Peter Christen Asbjornsen (Kindle)-- 1.43 stars averaged.

Novels-- 1. The Curse of Broken Shadows by Laura Winter (Kindle)-- 4 stars.

2. Murder Your Employer: The McMasters Guide to Homicide by Rupert Holmes 3.5 stars.

3. The Black Hawks by David Wragg (Kindle)--3.25 stars.

4. Misfit by Elle Kennedy-- 2.5 stars.

5. The Combat Codes by Alexander Darwin (NetGalley)-- 1.75 stars.

6. Text Appeal by Amber Roberts (NetGalley)-- 3.25 stars. 

7. Jade City by Fonda Lee-- 3.75 stars.

8. Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo-- 5 stars (original rating).

9. Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo -- 5 stars (original rating).

Overall, the average rating for the month is 3.33 stars. Which comes from some really high ratings with some really low ratings. I don’t mind it too much. I had a few really disappointing books, but also got to reread a favorite duology.

[canchewread]

Editor’s Note: after a sad and frustrating month, I’m back on the horse and hoping to resume regular writing again for roughly the next three and a half weeks before I program in a week off for the seasonal holidays.

In the time I was away, or rather writing only sporadically, I did have the occasion to power through roughly ten or so of the books in my Library, and as such I figured it might be worthwhile to cover some “book review” type posts in our regular “Quickshot Quotations” pieces for the next little while. Obviously the goal here is to produce shorter quotes and more focused reviews as opposed to the more traditional “lengthy quote plus review plus essay” format I typically write here on Can’t You Read. Although this is in no way ideal, the simple truth is that I read a lot more books than I could reasonably write a full-length essay about and as such this gives me a chance to cover a broader spectrum of the works in my Library over time.

Today’s post goes out to regular readers who have been teasing me on social media for refusing to review books I don’t like here on Can’t You Read; you’re in for a special treat because this edition of “Quickshot Quotations” finally features a book I’m unable to recommend without so many caveats as to call into question its value even for antifascist scholars - David Neiwert’s “Alt-America: the Rise of the Radical Right in the Age of Trump.”

In complete fairness, I should start by pointing out that I don’t think Alt-America is a bad book by any stretch of the imagination, and indeed there are some things about Neiwert’s magnum opus expose of American reactionary movements that cast a fresh light on the disastrous election of Donald Trump and the ongoing fallout from that event in our society.

Although Neiwert is hardly an engaging writer, his style is fairly accessible and comparable to the everyday journalism you’ll find in ostensibly “liberal” corporate media like say, The New Republic, or the US edition of The Guardian. Furthermore, the material presented in Alt-America is thoroughly researched and Neiwert’s two decades worth of tracking the reactionary right affords him some keen insights about seemingly divergent elements of the preexisting right wing revanchist movements that would coalesce around Downmarket Mussolini and improbably (or perhaps not so improbably) propel Trump to victory over Clinton in the 2016 US presidential election. In particular, the author’s examination of the (recently resurgent) decades-old American militia movement is the type of far-reaching analysis that has been otherwise so lacking in the mainstream liberal conception of anti-fascism and the Trump moment.

Unfortunately however, it is precisely this “mainstream liberal conception of anti-fascism” that seemingly blinds Neiwert to the true nature of the problem and ultimately makes it impossible for me to recommend Alt-America to readers who are not already familiar with the class dynamics, market forces and crisis of confidence in our institutions, that is driving the rise of so-called “right wing populism.”

In Niewert’s telling of the tale behind the Klepto Kaiser’s ascendance to the Oval Office, the devil in the details is not “economic stagnation in the northern Midwest, but... a far-right racist movement had been growing since the early 90s, which both enabled Trump’s victory and has been legitimized by it.” Tracing a line from the reactionary American militia movements of the 1990′s, through the (largely Astroturfed) fusion of the “black helicopter” right and pro-banking conservatives under the auspices of the Tea Party and finally to the “basket full of deplorables” who form what is commonly known as “Trumpism”, the author paints a compelling picture of an irresponsible media driven by untested technology, a crass opportunistic Republican Party happy to trade in conspiracy theories for votes and good old fashioned white supremacy, working together to put Donald Trump over Clinton and into the White House.

There is even some merit in these arguments. After all, Neiwert is probably correct in defining Trump’s presidency as both a logical byproduct of and an accelerant for a preexisting, uniquely American brand of fascism. Furthermore, the author is hardly the only expert to argue that U.S. media played a crucial (and tragic) role in electing Downmarket Mussolini. Finally, while it may be absurd to say that all Trump supporters are white supremacists, it’s also utterly impossible to deny that none of them had a problem voting for one.

The problem of course is that Donald Trump didn’t magically draw a bunch of voting nazis out of the woodwork to overwhelm an innocent and unsuspecting Democratic Party at the ballot box. In fact, if you look at the raw numbers it’s pretty clear that Trump’s final share of the vote looks an awful lot like Mitt Romney’s doomed 2012 run against incumbent Democrat president Barack Obama, with a moderate increase for overall population growth in the United States. By contrast, Hillary Clinton (who still won the popular vote) finished with slightly fewer votes than Obama did in 2012 - which, when you factor in the same population growth that put Trump above Romney, clearly indicates that the problem wasn’t fascists coming out to vote, but some combination of Democratic Party voters staying home and the American Electoral College system.

About Clinton’s inability to turn out voters and disastrous campaign, Neiwert has little to say; choosing to focus on the Alt-Right’s ability to weaponize social media through conspiracy theories instead of attempting to square the circle found in the argument that Midwestern racism prevented registered Democrats who voted for Obama, from casting a ballot in favor of a 69 year old white multi-millionaire whose husband had already been elected president, twice. Nor does the author have much to offer on the subject of the devastation wrought by neofeudalism in the very states Clinton lost due to low turnout, or the profound distrust American society has developed in its mainstream media, or the Democratic Party’s wholesale abandonment of the labor class in favor of the numerically smaller “professional managerial class” that now dominates most of the party’s rank and file concerns.

In other words, while Neiwert has a lot to offer on the subject of how Republican voters could easily reconcile themselves with an unhinged fascist like Trump, he has very little to offer (besides platitudes about “talking to Trump voters more”) on the subject of how the liberal mainstream consensus has contributed to their own demise by alienating (presumably) non-fascist, Democrat voters. For all of its positive qualities, Alt America never quite gets down to accepting that healthy societies don’t elect fascists and that the crumbling edifice of our openly corrupt institutions had as much to do with the election of a con artist like Trump, as America’s longstanding love affair with conspiracy theories and white supremacy. In the end you’re left with a book that tries to explain American fascism without discussing class tensions and in doing so, provides an excellent examination of the “what” but not the “why” behind the political ascendance of the reactionary US right and their chosen avatar, Donald Trump.

- nina illingworth

Independent writer, critic and analyst with a left focus. Please help me fight corporate censorship by sharing my articles with your friends online!

You can find my work at ninaillingworth.com, Can’t You Read, Media Madness and my Patreon Blog

. Updates available on Twitter, Mastodon and Facebook.

Chat with fellow readers online at Anarcho Nina Writes on Discord!

[doomedandstoned]

AS I DIE AT MY DESK

Interview by Shawn Gibson

Can you tell me the meaning of the band name As I Die At My Desk? I imagine dying in a cubicle in corporate hell!

The honest answer to this is that it was a joke. I overheard a co worker say it at work and I thought it would be a hilarious band name. It is also a bit ironic as I always told myself that I would do work I truly love and follow my passions as they tell you that stuff in high school and college and it hasn't worked out that way for me yet! I am not deterred. I do get to make music in my spare time. Music gets to be my fun escape. It gets to be my artistic outlet that I don't have to share if I don't want to. All that aside I am a man who loves to laugh and loves to joke. Despite the themes and sounds of the music which are very real and emotionally heavy for me, the band name was a way to take the piss out of the situation. I can laugh at myself for being a weirdo who likes heavy music, where people scream and howl like demons and laugh even harder at how ridiculous I must look doing that in the bedroom for my music. I am pretty serious about most things, but I have to remember to have fun. That is what I think is important. I'm sorry it's not a very metal answer!

Suicide as Cleansing by As I Die at My Desk

You do everything in As I Die At My Desk, all instruments right?

Yes, I do all instruments and my main goal is to try to not suck. I actually record through a pre amp and I use different virtual amp sims like Amplitube for my tones. I used my Sterling by Music Man John Petrucci 7 string guitar, Ibanez BTB7 7 string bass, and an Alesis brand electric drum set for this record. It's a pretty basic setup, but given the size of my recording space, it's the best I can do. I have been writing for the past eight years or so. This is my first attempt at a metal release despite the fact I am a huge metal head! I was pretty happy with what I was able to do by myself.

What are your influences musically?

My influences range from classical music to jazz to anything under the rock umbrella. I am particularly interested in Soviet era composers. Dmitri Shostakovich, Sergei Prokofiev, and Igor Stravinsky. The first instrument I started playing was a cello at age 10. I graduated college in 2016 and gave a recital featuring Shostakovich and Prokofiev. The desperation and darkness they were able to convey so beautifully have influenced me greatly. I don't have a lot of experience with jazz, but the works of Coltrane, Thelonios Monk and especially Miles Davis have influenced me, as well. I just love especially experimental music and anything that ties to reshape and reform the genres wherein they find themselves pigeonholed. My music doesn't really sound like it to me, but Dream Theater and Iron Maiden are two of my favorites. I didn't actually start to get into doom or sludge until college. Now I love that stuff! Eyehategod is one of my newer favorite bands, as well as Sumac and YOB.

What are some of your favorite books and movies?

I tend to read non-fiction. I am a big history nerd. However I have spent a lot of time in the fiction world, as well. Some of my favorites are Catch 22 by Joseph Heller, Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Twelve Chairs by Ilf and Petrov. I am a big Lynch and Tarantino fan! Blue Velvet and Eraserhead are two of my favorite films. Reservoir Dogs had a really big impact on me, as well. I first saw it when I was 14. It was so gritty and real to me then. That was a very realistic show of violence.

Are you a fan of horror books or movies?

I was a bigger fan of horror when I was in high school. I must have read every Stephen King a dozen times. I don't tend to like a lot of horror books or movies. There are some exceptions, I love monster movies. Give me Jaws or Godzilla any day! I tend to like movies that are creepy or unsettling, but I don't get into paranormal stuff. There are plenty of flesh and blood horrors in our world that are much more terrifying than ghosts.

You have some very heavy music with some very dark themes. What inspired 'Suicide As Cleansing' as your album title?

I am depressed and have anxiety. What more is there to say? To answer your question, though, the title popped into my head one day. I remember I was reading something on social media about mental health and the act of suicide. Someone described suicide as an act of cleansing. That idea stuck with me and I thought about it for quite some time. I decided to use that in an overall positive way. I thought that since I was channeling my negative and destructive feeling into my music, I was attempting to kill myself. Attempting to kill a bad part of myself that I don't want to have to deal with all the time and thus conducting a cleansing of sorts. I wanted that to be the album title because it reflected the whole reason I was making the record. It doesn't help to keep those feelings bottled up cause they fester. I urge anyone who has suicidal or self harming thoughts to seek help. Talk to people; they will listen. You may feel like it doesn't help, but it does. I struggle, but I feel better when I know I'm safe to talk about it. Here's why I give my wife a huge shout-out for being so supportive and understanding!

What was the inspiration for your songs on 'Suicide As Cleansing'?

The inspiration for this whole record was feeling trapped and depressed. Modern day life appears to be doing that for younger generations these days. Waking up one day and realizing careers that you were dead set on are no longer sustainable. Seeing all of the political strife becoming more prominent and ruining friendly and familial relationships. We live in a very depressing world. I don't need to get into all the issues facing us but there are many and enough that are potentially world ending are enough, to make anyone uneasy. In that way I feel that genuine themes of feeling trapped, powerless, isolated and really angry are appropriate.

I would say "No Pride" is one of my favorites. The gallop of the drums, the riff! I feel myself rocking and swaying. Definitely banging my head!

Thanks! It might be my favorite song on the album. It was actually fun to record that one and I did it in far fewer takes than the other ones.

"Trapped In The Bass-Ment" is hypnotizing! It's almost a chance to catch your breath from the other six songs that precede it!

I appreciate the comments! The whole track was written and recorded in one sitting. I am a big fan of drone and ambient music so it seemed fitting. I felt that even I needed a break after "No Pride." It just hit me really hard in conjunction with all the earlier tracks. I worried it might be boring for people, but I silenced that voice. I try to make music for myself, but I really appreciate it when people like my work!

"Annihilate Me" is the equivalent of the musical Dim Mak! Nine-minutes-and-fifty-eight seconds of destruction! Tell me about this song.

"Annihilate Me" was written over a span of about three days. I was in the middle of a very depressive episode and I remember sitting down with my guitar and playing the heaviest, angriest, gnarliest stuff I could get out of it. There was no preconceived plan as to lyrics or vocals. After I recorded the guitars and drums, I screamed anything that came to mind. It was a very cathartic episode and I view it as the perfect ending to an unpleasant journey.

Where did the artwork for 'Suicide As Cleansing' come from? What does it mean to you?

The cover art is a photograph taken from my lovely wife, who gets another shout-out. We were hiking at the Englewood Metropark and we noticed the tree almost all by itself. She took a bunch of photos of it because it was cool and interesting, also creepy. One thing I remember clearly, was the tree's base was covered with these beautiful yellow flowers. In a way I felt it represented the album. The tree itself was dead and bare. It was a little unsettling especially in the photos my wife took. The fact that life had sprung from this dead tree seemed to fit this theme of killing a part of yourself or perhaps a rebirth.

Calculating the Cost of Existence by As I Die at My Desk

Your second album 'Calculating The Cost of Existence' (2019) came out in December. What can you tell us about the new project?

I will say in terms of sound, the new record came out with a different sound. It's a doomy, sludgey mess for sure. There are more introspective parts included. The music is expressing a greater array of feelings than the first.

Another one-man effort?

Yes, I did all the instruments again. As long as I possess the tools to do it, it certainly makes it easier in the creative process not having to deal with other personalities or egos on something so deeply personal to me. Now with that said, I don't mind collaborating or anything in the future.

Is that strenuous at times doing everything in the band?

The worst part about recording is I am not the best musician. It is strenuous when I have to perform everything and I am not that great. (laughs) My skills on guitar and drums are intermediate at best. I have played bass longer so I am a much more confident bass player than I am anything else but that's not saying a lot. It also doesn't help that I don't like the sound of my voice. I fancy myself as a composer, not a performer.

As I Die At My Desk is from Dayton Ohio right?

Yes, the band is based out of Dayton, where I have lived for most of my life so far.

What are some bands from Ohio you love?

To be honest, I don't know a ton of bands from Ohio. I will say I am a fan of Mouth of the Architect and Others by No One out of Dayton, Cloudkicker out of Columbus. Oh I can't forget Skeletonwitch!

Have you been to Ohio Doomed and Stoned Fest?

This might be shocking but I have never heard of Ohio Doomed and Stoned Fest. So no I haven't been but I am certainly interested now!

Will As I Die At My Desk play live or tour down the road?

Well, As I Die At My Desk will probably remain a studio entity. As I said I wouldn't be opposed to any kind of collaboration or possible touring but I don't have any plans for that at the moment. Now for my pretentious answer. As an artist I do not want to feel confined to any one medium as it exists. As I Die At My Desk was born out of specific life circumstances. As long as these circumstances provide emotional weight and depth for me, this project will continue. Once that source dries up(if it ever really does) then I will move on to a new project. As it stands I have a few other projects that I am working on that I can't discuss much yet. Stay tuned!

Follow The Band

Get The Music

[elstonsblog]

2019

In my last yearly round-up, the goals for the end of 2019 were to have done:

365 drawings (1 a day of place and thought)

52 what I saws

12 reflective writing pieces

12 reasons to be cheerful

12 photographs of tattooed fruit

6 posters

6 punks

6 tattooed people

6 painted objects

6 zines

4 pieces of clothing

A piece of work printed/made

Learn stick and poke

Stall at an art fair

It’s obvious to say, that I didn’t complete all of my resolutions. There were tasks that I started and then fell through – like the 52 what I saw’s, then there were other tasked that changed throughout the year. Looking at these goals again I think my approach for the coming year will be slightly different. Fewer goals, bigger goals with more actions that can be divided throughout the year. Hopefully, after writing this I’ll have a clearer idea of what they’ll be so I’ll come back that at the end. 

The work I’ve created this year feels a lot more together than the 2018’s body of work. I’ve found comfort in the barrel pen and the application of a colour palette which helps give the work a sense of togetherness. While in 2020 I hope to expand my processes a bit more this year has been good to build confidence and find the fun in what I’m doing again. The goal of making my work and Instagram page look more varied (as previously it was lumps of the same work) I think has been successful. It has been achieved through daily drawings of whatever pops into my head at lunchtime to then be drawn up and coloured at the weekends. This way of working has suited me well as it gives me something to do at lunch and thinking of 1 thing a day is manageable into my routine... the downfall of it would be that it doesn’t give much room for larger ideas or projects – knowing this now, I hope to set some time aside on weekends to plan those out and then I could use the lunchtimes to progress them.

My way of working is still fairly analogue as all the lines are drawn by hand, scanned and then will be digitally coloured. If I were to get an iPad the processing time would go down but I don’t feel there is a need for that yet as everything I’m doing it on my own time and it’s a process I’m comfortable with that ensures my hand stays in the game. 

In 2018 I was focussed much more on observational drawing, this year I have come away from that and started to play around with things a bit more. Using ideas and objects and trying to focus on fun. There have been a few recurring pieces that I would like to continue in 2020, Reasons to be cheerful was started in 2019 and while the ones that have been created could do with a bit of freshening up I can redraw and update those while continuing it as eventually I’d like to make it into a book/poem of some kind so that it is in keeping with the original song. The half heads are also interesting to me to play with, stemming from this philosophy that the mind and body are separate yet connected – opening up the brain allows for better communication of what that person is feeling. I’m not sure what the half heads will lead to in terms of the outcome.. but it’s a nice outlet for me to communicate feelings.

The platform that I am using is starting to increase which is starting to give me a better understanding of who my audience is. Before my nephew was born I was reluctant to do child-focused things but my view on that has changed a lot seeing how he interacts with pictures and toys. For a few months in the latter part of the year, I was seeing my work as being in the soft middle of nothing as it isn’t too much one thing or much the other. With that in mind, I started to make things with soft middles. Felt soft toys that are just like physical drawings, making them takes longer than drawing does but it’s nice to have something physical at the end of it. It’s something that is still quite new to me so there’s an excitement there. Because of the material and general look of the bright coloured soft and squishy objects, they lend themselves to children. When drawing the ideas of what to make I made sure that it was things that interest me rather than trying to use the toys to make only baby stuff, this has also helped keep my interest. A goal for this year is to make stuff so that I can go to stalls – having a face on contact with people will give me a much better idea of who my audience is and meet other creative people.

I’d say that the most successful aspects of my work this year is the progression of my visual toolkit, I’ve found my eyes and my nose and my colours. Things that I’m able to apply to any drawing I do. This has been helpful and I’m hoping it will continue to progress and change as currently when I ditch the nose it looks quite kawaii which isn’t quite what I’d hoped for but with more practice, I’ll find an alternative. This year I need to focus some effort on creating body shapes as many of my drawings with people in are just headshots other than body’s that were observed. I think that’s because when drawing the half heads, I draw them naked. I can do full body monkeys and skeletons and, I’m sure, with the addition of clothes I’ll be able to do people – I just need to put some effort into making sure it happens. ­

On the flip side of that, my least successful aspect would be refinement and placement. Throughout the year I’ve just been drawing one thing then moving on to the next with no real thinking of what I could use this for, where could I put this.. how can I push it? I think 2020 will see some refining of existing work as now it’s been drawn and I’ve had time away from it I can think and see it differently. I’d like to make some of the things already created into gifs, prints etc. so that they’re not just stuck as they currently are.

Other than a handful of projects, most of my work didn’t involve research into an area or subject – which has led the pieces to be seen at face value, most of them aren’t trying to communicate anything deeper which when looking back over the body of work makes it feel a little light. Not by any means does this mean that my work suddenly has to become all serious or obvious – but I think I could benefit from taking more interest in the news, short stories etc. to attempt to convey messages, tales and ideas rather than just images.

Overall, I think this past year has been a good step in the right direction that I hope to continue taking forward. I’ve played around with stick + poke; made a group exhibition;  redesigned my website and opened up more social media channels; made work for other people; designed an alphabet and learnt to sew (to pick my favourite few). Through focusing on drawing happier things I have also held a happier state of mind – I think both things feed into each other. While I’m not where I want to be yet (and I don’t know what that is) I’m positive that by carrying on I’ll get somewhere. My confidence in the drawing is getting better but now I think I need to focus my efforts on application and ideas of the drawings. 

In 2020, my main aims are to work towards (and hopefully do) a stall in either Bristol or London along with creating a self-promotion pack to send out to possible prospective clients. I have loosely planned my year with the main recurring projects that I would like to achieve this year, it looks slightly barer than the previous year but having fewer objectives means I can spend more time on them to make it the best version possible. I will be continuing with creating image ideas at lunchtime and working towards a bigger goal in the evenings. There is a possibility of my full-time job ending mid-year so what I’ve set out to do may suffer during deciding whether to do an MA or looking for another job... but none the less, these are my goals for 2020:

Make 24 Felt toys

Make 12 Editorial response drawings

Make 12 Zines

Make 12 Reasons to be cheerful

Make 12 Cards

Read 12 comics

Take 10 Polaroids a month

Write 12 reflection pieces

Design and distribute the self-promo pack

Stall at an art fair

[peterwknox]

My 2019 Year in Reading at GoodReads

46 books. 14,455 pages.

17 Fiction. 29 NonFiction.

20 Female Authors. 26 Male.

22 Print. 24 Digital.

21 Library Digital.

-

*2018

52 books. 12,504 pages.

20 Fiction. 32 NonFiction.

30 Print. 22 Digital.

21 Female Authors. 31 Male.

18 Library Digital.

*2017

47 books/15,472 pages. 18 Fiction. 29 NonFiction.

19 Print. 28 Digital. 16 Female. 31 Male.

25 Library Digital.

*2016

50 books/18,944 pages. 22 Fiction/28 NonFiction.

18 Print/32 Digital. 15 Female/35 Male.

27 Library Digital.

*2015

44 books/14,765 pages. 25 Fiction/19 NonFiction.

30 Print/14 Digital. 10 Female/34 Male.

7 Library Digital.

*2014

39 books/14,316 pages. 18 Fiction/21 NonFiction.

20 Print/19 Digital. 14 Female/25 Male.

12 Library Digital.

-

This year I read 46 books, which was my set goal because I’ve read on average 46 books each of the last 6 years I’ve been tracking my reading goals. But then I tackled the behemoth 3.7 pound The Power Broker at the end of summer which took me 3 months (with no regrets!) and I had to add in some shorter books and books I read through work to make my number. Fair. I ended up reading more pages overall despite reading fewer books than last year.

My goal last year was to read more female authors and female fiction. While I read six fewer titles than I did last year, I did read a higher percentage of female writers. While I did read less female fiction, I did read more female nonfiction (which was some of the most enjoyable reading of my year).

I read more library ebooks this year than last year (and have gotten my wife into the same habit), more than paying for me to get a new Kindle device for us to share. Overall I’m reading just slightly more ebooks than print (24 v 22). Next year in 2020 I’m going to keep the same goal of more female fiction, because it’s working to push me to find new favorites. Almost all of my favorite fiction this year (like last year) was from female authors. 

If any book ever catches your interest, I hope you follow through in finding a way to acquire and read it - check out my reviews (I write a review for every book I read) and let me know what you’re reading these days. Read on!

My top 3 reads from 2019:

Favorite Fiction:

Homegoing

Little Fires Everywhere

Trust Exercise

Favorite NonFiction:

The Power Broker

Trick Mirror

Educated

Honorable Mentions:

The Fifth Estate

Normal People

Fleishman Is In Trouble