#but like the community was so positive. even the ppl that didn't want him were polite abt it ( from what i remember seeing )

[slut-lord]

i kinda want to write a deep dive essay on silence of the lambs WRT gender and transmisogyny bc it's actually a much more complicated topic than a lot of people realise

[madeimpact]

Remembering Sora's smash reveal and crying a little

[lostreverb]

SOME RANDOM THOUGHTS / HEADCANONS ABOUT MAX COOPERMAN

just realized that aside from jake, most of max's relationships with people were either superficial or transactional which he probably just thought was normal growing up as a rich kid who was a "loser" learning that ppl only liked him when he had something to give them.

of course, when he was younger everyone loved to go to his birthday parties b/c his parents were loaded and they always planned something extravagant to try and make up for the fact they were never really around but, as he got older his parents stopped really caring to put on those parties. after that, no one bothered to give max any attention or befriend him unless they saw his wealth as something useful, or just brought him around so he could be the butt of the joke. and the second they got what they wanted from him they discarded him. being the kind-hearted and naive boy he is, he doesn't really fully grasp it until after ryan beats him to a pulp. he brushes off what happens but it honestly profoundly affects him from then on.

he thought ryan was a friend but turns out he was just being taken advantage of, his parents didn't care to come see him in the hospital despite how serious his condition was, and jake, the only genuine friend he ever had, ends up leaving (prolly bc college) and max later refers to him in passing as "a guy i brought up back in the day" which hints that they likely don't talk anymore.

so college starts. a fresh slate. max guards himself with this macho (with a very small hint of being an asshole) persona. he's got a leadership position as the RA of his floor, got two nerdy "friends" that are very reminiscent of ryan and his guys (remember when they snicker along with him at mike?), and a semi-famous reputation online. he loses weight the summer before college and decides to stop fighting (probably caused by the trauma from ryan) but we see he uses hand grips so even he definitely wants to keep himself strong for his physique and to protect himself. though max is still fairly lean which is likely an insecurity for him. the last thing he ever wants to be seen as is a dork.

let's not even talk about how being conditioned like this affects his views on women and relationships. first off in highschool he only gets attention from baja's friends b/c of his association with jake, then in college he gets all this attention because he's "attractive" now and has this cool car, dorm and fame due to the fighting videos + promotions. he's (mostly) only ever made out with drunk women at parties or events that just throw themselves at him but it never goes further than that.

he likely has made himself believe that he should think of women as prizes (again as awful as ryan was max kind of molds his new self with his influences subconsciously. he had the kind of attention, the girls, the intimidation factor max aspires to have), but if a girl were to ever genuinely like him it would fry his brain. he wouldn't understand the idea of someone wanting to spend time with him, even if he wasn't really doing anything. to intently listen to him and partake in his interests. or how much happier you'd look after just going on a walk around campus with him vs. when he bought you jewelry or flowers.

it left him with a feeling he only experienced once before when jake saved him, and went after ryan.

it just clicks for him like-

oh. this is how it feels to be genuinely cared for.

it's not soon after he realizes that you tell him you love him for the first time, while cuddling in bed (he's sure his mother used to say it to him when he was younger but he honestly can't really remember anymore-- the most communication he has with his parents now is the deposits into his bank account).

once the door closes, and you've left for your classes.. he feels the lingering heat of your lips, your words echoing in his head and the way you looked at him...

and he cries.

[bonesandthebees]

Okay fuck it. I think scrolling for hours today is enough DJFKGKFK I'll just log back out. I wanna focus my energy on more positive things

Im so gonna log back in the minute my friend sends me another tweet but HDKGKGKD no. I will do my best. He's not worth our time man.

Okay one more tiny rant about him and then I promise I'll stop I just OOOHHMYGODHFJGKG HE JUST. I had so much hope. That. He would reply and it wouldn't fix things, I wouldn't go back to watching him or anything but at the very least I could get closure that like? Maybe his closer friends would be able to heal and move on? Idk if that's parasocial or whatever but he was such a big role model for me the past few years I really had hope that at least some parts of it were real, you know? And instead we just find out that he not only did these shitty things but didn't fucking learn and did it to other people too and??? It's really really upsetting that he created this safe space, this community of people who were all so lovely while just being. Fake. The whole time. And he doesn't even have the gull to properly apologise and I just??#?# idk what to do with my emotions LMFAO I'd finally started to feel better and like move on but now today I'm just angry again grgrgfhfjdkdk and I totally get that like him being a complete dickhead is easier in a lot of ways bc there's no. Doubting it. Or anything. Like there's no redeeming him. And we can get closure from that. But fuckkk it hurts so badly and the tl is a mess of ppl being like "well this person would never do me wrong" and then ppl being like "fuck every YouTuber ever actually. We can't ever be sure we know them" and LIKE!$?_?$?

Dude I am so conflicted on so many levels rn I feel like my entire world has just been yeeted into the sun LMFAODKFKFKFK

Anyways. Anyways. Thank you bee. Ur tumblr is the only account w a brain rn fr lmfaodjfkfkfks

I get it, I'm fucking furious at him. he had a chance to at least own up to what he did. I wouldn't have gone back to consuming his content, but I could be somewhat at peace knowing he was taking steps towards being better.

I don't want to think it was all a lie, because abusers aren't all completely evil people. the thing is, wilbur is human. a very shitty human, but human nonetheless. and we can't know for sure how healthy or unhealthy every relationship in his life has ever been and I think overanalyzing that or trying to figure out what was fake and what was real isn't really our business or worth our time. wilbur is a guy who has hurt a lot of people, but also refuses to recognize the hurt he's caused. that's it.

I do hate the dichotomy I'm seeing between people trying to prop up their own favorite white boys on a pedestal because apparently people never learn, but also going out and saying every content creator is inherently evil and we shouldn't trust any of them. these people are human. they're all going to fuck up at some point, some worse than others. and sometimes they'll fuck up in a way that they can move past and we can forgive them for, and other times they'll fuck up in a way that shows they shouldn't have the platform they have. they're not all terrible, and they're not all perfect. that's what we should be keeping in mind for the future.

[the-dumpster-fire-of-life]

I am BEGGING for some good ol' gustav fluff. I will take absolutely anything, my bbg needs sum love. Thank you mwah<3

(hello! Thank you for your requests and I love Gustav a bunch so here ya go! Enjoy!)

Gustav Schäfer Fluff HC'S

I feel like he could be the best boyfriend you could ever have

Probably is the guy to be big and good with communication

Like if you're upset and the type to just say "I'm fine."

He's just like "No, you're not. What's the matter?"

He just wants to hear what's going on and if you have daddy and mommy issues like me, it's absolutely shocking

He gives the best hugs I feel

Like a full on enveloping hug and a small kiss on the head

It's the hugs that sorta feel so comforting like a pillow and also one you wanna fall asleep in

He is the one to legit do anything as long as it involved being with you

You wanna go get shit faced?

He's fucking in!

You wanna prank the band?

He's down!

Sometimes being in a band gets overwhelming and being famous at such a young age

So he finds comfort in being able to go to you!

Staying up all night with this man in a hotel room is a must

When you guys were younger you would prank call so many people

Making pillow forts no matter how old you guys got

It's practically a tradition

I feel like he was very upfront when you guys confessed feelings

He didn't want to hide them and maybe miss out on his chance of being with you

Luckily, he got it!

Boy is not letting go now

You guys on the tour bus are always found sleeping somehow

You guys just nap in the weirdest positions but always look so comfortable

Like he's sleeping on his back, your back to his chest as you both have a blanket over y'all and are just passed out

Bill is like y'all's adopted child

Y'know those Tiktoks of a friend tagging along with their two friends who are dating and the audio is like "Mama e papa, Mama e papa."

That's Bill with you guys all the time!

He is very responsible I feel but also can be immature

You two are messing around with each other in interviews a lot

He's more quiet and if you're outgoing it's a cute little trope

He honestly feels though it was a perfect match if you're more quiet and reserved like him

He likes the calm sometimes but he also loves the chaos

He and you try out new restaurants a lot as dates and somehow it always is fun

You guys have gotten into it sm that you guys have had ppl staring at you guys as you die laughing

You guys laugh so hard sometimes the laughs turn silent and ppl are genuinely concerned

To stop you from talking in like interviews if you're saying something and you guys are bickering, he puts his hat on your head and covers your face with it going "shush"

He's got strong emotions so if you can handle that, great!

He would never want you to feel uncomfortable

If you're one to not really be in touch with emotions like I am, if you just find it hard due to how you grew up or shit like that, since he has such strong ones I feel like he would help you with that

Showing you it's okay to have your own emotions

He can be such a sweetheart

Literally never forgetting even the little details about you

Can remember everything to what you first said to him when you guys met all the way to present day

He stays in the back but you can always be seen trying not to burst out laughing

Why?

Because he whispering shit in your ear about anything and everything

He says the most random shit and he is somehow so passionate about that random shit you can't help but die

He says the most random and rancid things that sometimes you just have to stare for a minute

He is such a goofball

Can make you laugh at any given time of any day

Will poke you and make jokes if you're upset until you laugh

He can be so insulting without meaning to be

Especially when he just doesn't think before he says stuff

He has shocked himself sometimes with what he says

He loves the little thing, the big things, you entirely, and practically everything that comes with you!

[destinyc1020]

Destiny, I don't know if i can ask this question but there has been some discussion on Zendaya's role in the Nolan film and how bith her and Lupita allegedly supporting roles whilst Tom, Damon and Hathaway are core leads. THR also said Rob was a lead, but their the only ones cause the rest of the trades haven't said one thing.

On one hand, I'm a fan of both Tom and Z, and if their in a film together outside of SM, I'm there regardless. But I'm also trying to be objective and fair, and see from both sides. Although I was annoyed with some stans complaining, I can see why they're frustrated.

Zendaya is the most impactful actress/celeb of her generation, and yet she's not been a lead that much. She's always playing roles in service of yt leads directed by white men.

Daisy Edgar-Jones has been a lead 4 times in a film, and Sydeny Sweeney has been a lead 7 times and is currently working to be in a lead in two other projects rn, her biopic and that movie with Amanda. Zendaya has been famous for longer and has been a lead twice (not counting the drama), and mainly supporting roles despite her being the reason most ppl go to see a project. I remember when Dune Part 1 came, and ppl were complaining how little screen time she had and Denis promised her in the sequel he would add more character depth for her even to the annoyance of Dune purists which I personally feel was a good choice considering in the books, Chani is just like Javier bardems character lol and that wouldn't be fun to watch.

However, I do think it's interesting that these fans only have this criticism now, considering in past interviews, Z has spoken how she'd rather be a small role in a great film than a lead in a bad film and despite Daisy and Sydney being leads only a few of those films are watchable lol. Most are duds, no shade, and won't be remembered if you're not a core stan. The main issue is that they hate her with Tom. Again, I don't want to police fandoms cause ppl should be entitled to vent sometimes, I didn't always agree with that Tom blog thatwas here but there times I was frustrated with the Francessa situation and how it was handled and those washed allegations and not all blogs are equipped to deal with anons who want to vent and be negative. But those fans want nothing to do with Tom, and I just know if Tom wasn't the lead and it was someone else, ppl wouldn't be this vexed. It'd be understandable if he was a horrible person, but he's not, and that sometimes sucks as a fan of both.

Not to gas him too much because I read on that x app that female fans of yt men are equivalent to boy mothers😱, but Tom is in privileged position as a man and still is a good person, outside looking in. Most actors around his age are grinding like crazy to make their mark, and oftentimes, male actors are bad to date because they are very selfish because it ride or die for them. Tom isn't like that. He doesn't dominate his career over his relationships. Like, no offence to these guys cause they are talented, but Glen Powell and Timothee speak about how much their career means so much to them and what they've sacrificed. Glen lost his relationship over that showmance and Timothee before Kylie was not a relationship guy at all, like if it's affecting his career, he'd drop the girl lol. I say this as someone who was a fan at the beginning but now more of a casual fan, lol. Kylie is his longest, but it's lasted cause she's more successful than him and has the finance to work around his intense schedule. He recently admitted that he went method for that dylan biopic and didn't communicate with family and friends for 3 months cause of it. Tom wouldn't do that. Even when he was struggling mentally with TCR, he was always making time for his charities and going to see Z in Budapest and Jordan. That's his perogative, but most male actors wouldn't do that.

I also remember you and some other fans wanting Tom to take more supporting roles to take the pressure of being in leads and to add more variety to his filmography. So, having Tom as the lead for Nolan and American Speed is great, but also like Tom, we are going forward but backwards, if that makes sense.

Another viewpoint that both sides need to consider is that Nolan is known for his ensembles in films, and the most impactful films have the best supporting roles.

Heath Ledger, Cillian Murphy, Elliot Page, Christian Bale in the prestige, Dunkirk supporting roles, Rob Pattinson, RDJ, Emily Blunt, Tom Hardy...

One could argue they were the best parts of their films but also none of them are as imoactful and are the current A-list like Z is, according to Complex and THR list.

Also, sorry for the rant, lol. I just like to see both sides of a situation because ppl need to see others' perspectives and not take it personally. I'm speaking for myself cause I do take things personally😭

All love✌🏾💓

Whew.... Chiiiiilllle.... you went all the way from Adam to Armageddon with your ask Anon lol 😆 😂

I'm really trying to figure out what the point of your whole ask is, or what it's overall trying to say? I don't understand your question, I'm sorry. 😔

First, you start off talking about the Nolan casting, then you talk about your disappointment with the Francesca/R&J play stuff, then you talk about fans not liking Tom, then you go on to compare other actors to Tom and how they're selfish and are hustling in their careers, then you go back to talking about Nolan and supporting actors, and then you end with again complaining about how Z isn't a lead in this Nolan film. 🥴

Chiiiiilllle, I'll be honest, I was a bit confused lol. I wasn't sure if this was just a personal rant that you needed to get out of your system and you didn't really want a response back, or if you actually wanted me to respond lol. 😅

Anyway, in case you wanted my response, I'll try to just respond back to a few things that you said.....

Click Below For My Thoughts: 👇🏾

Zendaya is the most impactful actress/celeb of her generation, and yet she's not been a lead that much. She's always playing roles in service of yt leads directed by white men.

Perhaps Z just likes being in certain films with certain directors, and doesn't really care whether she's lead or not right now? 🤷🏾‍♀️

I think fans need to stop putting that pressure on Zendaya to be who they want her to be, instead of just letting her BE.

Plus, we all saw just how much PRESSURE it was for her to lead "Challengers" all on her own shoulders. The girl dropped like 10 lbs during the press tour! 😩 Being the LEAD of a film is not only a lot of hard work, but it's also a lot of pressure. I don't think people realize this. The film is riding ALL on your own shoulders. That's a lot!

Zendaya is the one choosing these roles. She might be getting offers for lead roles, but maybe they're not roles that call to her, or they're crappy. Women in Hollywood (especially woc) don't always have the best options for roles. It's just the truth. She's more than likely very picky.

If you have a problem with the roles that Z is choosing for HERSELF, then maybe you need to talk to Z directly lol. 😅

I honestly don't see anything wrong with Z's career choices so far. I actually think she's been very smart in her career choices? 🤷🏾‍♀️

Daisy Edgar-Jones has been a lead 4 times in a film, and Sydeny Sweeney has been a lead 7 times and is currently working to be in a lead in two other projects rn, her biopic and that movie with Amanda. Zendaya has been famous for longer and has been a lead twice (not counting the drama), and mainly supporting roles despite her being the reason most ppl go to see a project.

First of all, I don't usually like to compare woc to white women in Hollywood, for obvious reasons. 😒

But second, have you forgotten that Zendaya plays the lead to a show that Sydney herself is on as well? 🤔 Have you forgotten that Zendaya is a 2-time Emmy winner? No shade to Sydney at all, but she hasn't accomplished that yet. Just saying.... 🤷🏾‍♀️

I keep saying that it's not so much how many times you've been a lead. There are plenty of actors out here who have NEVER led a major film before and they're awesome supporting actors, and people LOVE them. Don't sleep on supporting roles. Sometimes, those are the most impactful in a film.

But those fans want nothing to do with Tom, and I just know if Tom wasn't the lead and it was someone else, ppl wouldn't be this vexed. It'd be understandable if he was a horrible person, but he's not, and that sometimes sucks as a fan of both.

Re: Tom, Z, and the Nolan film.... I think fans just need to wait and see how the film turns out before having mental breakdowns about who has how much screen time, and who's the lead and whatnot. But maybe that's just me. 🤷🏾‍♀️

And as far as some fans not liking Tom.... Unfortunately, we can't change people's minds about someone. Their dislike of him is very irrational, especially for someone so nice as Tom is. But when hate seems irrational, you know that it's not based on logical things. In that case, you can just ignore all the nonsense.

Tom is in privileged position as a man and still is a good person, outside looking in.

Yes, Tom is a very good person, both inside and out! 🥰

Most actors around his age are grinding like crazy to make their mark, and oftentimes, male actors are bad to date because they are very selfish because it ride or die for them. Tom isn't like that. He doesn't dominate his career over his relationships. Like, no offence to these guys cause they are talented, but Glen Powell and Timothee speak about how much their career means so much to them and what they've sacrificed.

Hmm... 🤔 I mean, I think it's nice to recognize Tom's good qualities without putting other actors down. 🥴

First of all, I feel that it's just difficult in the Hollywood industry to date just in general. 😔 As an actor, your life is VERY transient. I can see how that would make it difficult for many to date or be in serious relationships.

Tom and Z got very LUCKY. Let's not forget that. They've also been dating each other for like 8 years and are in a totally different stage of their relationship (I say engaged lol 🤭) than they were just 4 years ago, and compared to other actors. I wouldn't compare TZ (who have been dating for 8 years and are more likely engaged) to a couple that's only been dating each other for 2 or 3 years. Keep in mind too that TZ as well weren't moving in this way at the beginning of their careers. They were moving very differently. Recall how many DROUGHTS we had during the Tomdaya 1.0 period lol. 😅 They were also long distance for years, so they have always had to make the most of their time with each other. Vs. other couples who usually live in the same city as their significant others, or, at least the same continent rofl and can see them more freely.

Second..... I think another thing we have to keep in mind is that Tom isn't having to "grind" like he used to because he has Disney/MCU money. 💰 He was the lead of a HUGE major franchise at like, age 19. MOST actors aren't making bank like that. No offense. And all of the actors you mentioned aren't in a position to just coast like that.

Glen Powell for example, has been acting for years, but he is currently in his mid-30s and is JUST now starting to get his career going. He's JUST now receiving lead roles and recognition for his work after years of working as a background and supporting actor with minor screen time. Glen didn't have Spiderman in his early 20s to set him up in a rich money situation where he doesn't have to hustle.

Same with Timothee.

I think it's just good for fans to recognize that. Also, there's nothing wrong with hustling. You should hustle now so you don't have to hustle later. Z did the same exact thing. In fact, Tom did the same exact thing as well if you notice.

Also, I feel like MOST actors sacrifice a lot in this industry. Tom himself has sacrificed a lot. His personal time, a normal life, being able to walk down the street unnoticed, SLEEP lol, etc. MOST actors sacrifice a lot to be in this industry. It's not an easy industry to be in. I personally don't think there's anything wrong with Timmy, Glen, or other actors mentioning how much they've sacrificed for their work, but maybe that's just me.

He recently admitted that he went method for that dylan biopic and didn't communicate with family and friends for 3 months cause of it. Tom wouldn't do that. Even when he was struggling mentally with TCR, he was always making time for his charities and going to see Z in Budapest and Jordan. That's his perogative, but most male actors wouldn't do that.

Well, honestly? I think more actors than you realize have gone "method" for at least one role in their career rofl 🤣 Do I think it's the best method of acting? No. But I can see why some actors can easily get sucked into that even unknowingly, especially when they are doing an intense role, or a role for a biopic film. I don't think it's smthg to look down upon, but just smthg to hope that the actor learns from, and that they decide that there are better ways of getting a good work product without needing to go method.

For Timmy, I get the impression that was just for this Bob Dylan role anyway. I don't get the impression he goes method for all of his films. 🤷🏾‍♀️

I also don't usually like using such finite statements like the one in red above, because the truth of the matter is, we really DON'T know what might happen in the future. Saying, "Tom would NEVER do that" just sounds so..... so.... definitive, but I never like saying stuff like that, coz idk! 🤷🏾‍♀️ And what if he does one day? Then what are we going to say?

Tom has also NEVER played the lead in a major biopic film playing a huge, well-known musician that everyone knows either. So....We really don't know what that kind of huge weight and pressure on someone can do. 😔

I'm just saying, let's not be too judgmental of other actors, coz anything can befall anybody.

I also remember you and some other fans wanting Tom to take more supporting roles to take the pressure of being in leads and to add more variety to his filmography. So, having Tom as the lead for Nolan and American Speed is great, but also like Tom, we are going forward but backwards, if that makes sense

Yes! I said that I think Tom would benefit from taking on a great supporting role on a well-done film with an awesome director, than a lead role in a lackluster film. I also said that he should do an ensemble film again. With this Nolan film it looks like he's doing just that! 😃👍🏾

Another viewpoint that both sides need to consider is that Nolan is known for his ensembles in films, and the most impactful films have the best supporting roles

Most definitely! 😊 So far, I have loved a lot of Nolan's ensemble films (i.e. "Inception", "Oppenheimer", "TENET"). They're usually very well done. 😀 His supporting characters (usually male) tend to have really great roles. I'm SUPER excited about this one. 😁

[push-tet]

@hellodahliah special for you 🥰 and for ppl who want to understand the lore of my Verona

kind of an addendum to the last post

bruh im sorry that this post came out so long!!

The Counts origin: The Counts, like the Сapps, were once an aristocracy. But after losing the election to Macbeth's ancestor, the Counts' ancestors ceased to consider themselves aristocrats. Leaving the path of palitics the Counts chose the path of jurisprudence. The Counts were able to maintain their power and influence over Veronaville by pulling the strings of law and justice

Escalus-Prince - Knowledge\Pisces- 5\3\9\1\7

Yeah, he's got a double name but everyone just calls him Escalus or Escal

He's too empathic for a job in the judiciary

He met his ex-wife at uni, he thought it was the real love but in fact she was using him to improve her position at uni so that she would not be expelled (he did all her academic work for her). When the truth came out, he didn't make a scene and just asked her to leave

After the death of Ledia Macbeth (the mayor at the time), he continues her work trying to reconcile the old generation of feuding clans

Escalus couldn't spend much time with his son. That's why they have a strained relationship with him

Escalus realizes he's spoiled Paris. While he has time, he tries to carefully correct this mistake so that he knows Paris will be a worthy successor to the family business

Gregorio - Romance\Taurus - 4\7\3\8\3

He is the first adopted son of the Summerdreams. When he grew up, he changed his last name

He was in love with a servant girl at the Сapp House (at the time of the game, the deceased Angelica Nurse)

He's a master of bad flirting

Before he became the Counts' butler, he tried his hand at stand-up

Gregorio still doesn't know how to react to Paris' words - You're like a big brother to me

After the fire at the old Count manor, he developed hydrophobia

Paris - Family\Leo - 5\8\3\4\5

Paris was born and spent half his childhood in Champs Les Sims. But his parents were going on a long expedition, so they returned to Veronaville and left their son in the care of Escalus. They promised to send him a card or letter once a month, but he hadn't received one in over three years (they're alive)

Paris was chubby in chilhood

Paris got interested in drawing after watching - Little Miss Wendalyn (fun fact - it's also Romeo's fav cartoon) At the moment, the biggest fan of his doodles is Merc

Paris is a little self-centered and makes himself a pretty good-looking guy. But even so, he always says - There's beauty in everyone. Someone just didn't think to wash their face today

Paris has been friends with Julliette since childhood but her liaison with Romeo annoys him. Paris just can't turn a blind eye to Romeo's shameful reputation. Not because he's jealous nonono

Paris and Romeo don't openly show their dislike for each other and pretend they are good bros. Paris calls him Gnomeo

The Zhung origin:

The fairies of the Zhung Clan are famous tea masters and their outdated views on life. The men of the clan are outstanding healers and the women of the clan are supposed to be creative but devote themselves to looking after the family. But no member of the family is allowed to leave the homeland without special permission from the elders. Failure to follow the rules is punishable by condemnation and condemnation within the family

Yingtai - Virgo\Family 8\3\5\3\6

After her daughter left the family, Yingtai devoted herself to a career in music. She is fluent in playing all musical instruments and has often performed at the opera

As a young girl, Yangtai disobeyed her family and went to university abroad dressed as a man

Yingtai's husband openly despised her family. He despised them so much that he refused to use his wife's surname after marriage

Yingtai hasn't spoken another language for a long time, so when she arrives in Veronaville she starts to communicate with everyone in her native language as a habit

Yingtai remains devoted to her husband even after his death

Yintai knows all types and kinds of teas by heart. So she's literally like: Fuck your zodiac signs. What's your favorite tea?; Her favorite - Longjing tea

please someone ask me about Yingtai and her husband's relationship they are my Roman Empire

Madam - Aries\Pleasure 5\6\6\4\4

i found an old post about her bruh

Madam change her name and took her second husband's surname so she and her daughter wouldn't be part of the Zhung

Madam hates everything to do with her father. Unlike her mother, Madame is convinced that he is not dead but simply ran away

Madame works as a fashion photographer but also successfully designs her own custom-made clothes. Some of her clients include - Marissa Cleveland, Armand DeBateau, Mercutio Monty, Klara Vonderstein, Goneril and Kent Capp, Bella Goth, Cordial sisters

Madame doesn't hate men, she just doesn't like it when men try to control women

After the "death" of her father, Yingtai fell into a deep depression and stopped paying attention to her daughter, because of this Madame became unmanageable and often deliberately got into trouble

After leaving home, Madame still has a habit of asking after the welcome - "Would you like some tea?" Her favorite - Pu Erh with basil-cherry

Helana - Scorpio\Fortune 7\4\7\4\3

When Helena was studying martial arts in Shang Simla. (btw the homeland of Madam and Yingati) She overworked herself so much that she now has to dye her hair blond to cover up a bunch of gray hairs

Helena the union of an ordinary sim and a fairy. A half-breed. She does not have access to such fnctions as - long life and magic. But in she excels in physical activities of ordinary sims

Fact: Helena was able to reeducate Paris to do his job properly

For Helna, Hermia is dead. So when she's asked to stop ignoring Hermia's existence, she says - I'm not crazy enough to talk to a ghost

Helena seems to be a cold person, but if you talk to her for a while, you will find out that in addition to white arts, she bakes cookies/buns to drink tea with (if Paris doesn't eat all the sweets in one go); Her favorite - green tea with peach

The Snout also have a dog named Peek

He was a present for Madam from father-in-law. i don't know how to describe him, i'll just show it

he's also supposed to be a Spitz

fact: the only three characters here are not Shakespearean references

hmmm, should i put Madam-Helena and Escalus-Paris templates for download?

[skylarbee]

Over the years I have seen many fandoms and fans of all kinds, but yes, in fact lately the AM fandom is really becoming something unmanageable for anyone even for those who perhaps follow the band for the music without wanting to know anything about the gossip. I think this is also partly the fault of Tiktok which has led many young people to want to follow the band and therefore to become attached to certain characters without knowing what they have done in the past, they want to throw shit at people they didn't know until two years ago like Miles for example and blaming him for everything is saying disgusting things towards him that really, just reading it brings tears to my eyes. I don't know what will happen as soon as the tour ends, I hope things calm down even if it's hard for me given Amanda and Matt's attitude in the last few days

yes to all of this! the only times that i've searched for gossip were when i already heard a lot of rumours against my will and i wanted to see if they were true (other people should do this too instead of immediately believing/disbelieving something they've read on the internet...). other than that, the moment i open any social media, it's all there without me having to press a single button, and i'm sure that lots of other people have it the same way.

i do think too that tiktok might have something to do with it. i wasn't this deep in the fandom until only like three years ago, so i don't know what the situation was with younger fans before that. i also said a lot of stupid shit on the internet when i was really young, so i can't expect much from the young fans, especially the ones who have no idea about how problematic LV is and love her to bits. the extremely sad thing is that i've seen SO many people who do know a thing or two, and they still think that she's done nothing wrong (like ppl saying that she's a 'queen' for being the one alex cheated with, that she should be proud of it and brag about it, or the ones that congratulate her and say that they would've done even worse things just to get in alex's pants - just some vomit-inducing stuff)

the thing with miles makes me the saddest, i feel you anon. there are loads of people out there who spread false information and call him things that he's not - but what's even worse than this is there are people who have no idea about these things, and still hate on him and make fun of him for absolutely no reason. like he said, we have to accept the fact that this is the way it always will be; i can't even get mad anymore when interviewers constantly bring up alex/tlsp when talking to him. i don't think it will ever change. let's all learn from LV and do the opposite of what she does - when we see people talking shit, we should just click that block/mute button and go about our day without paying attention to it and posting on our stories about it (if i were to sit down and argue with every person on twitter who says something bad about him, i'd do that 24/7). miles' fans are the sweetest people out there (like artist like fan) and we should focus on not ruining the pure and good vibes that miles transmits to us via his IG (reason why i don't tag these posts with his name). if he can take some minutes out of his life (almost) every day to post cute things for us, we should also send him back positive things - out of tens of fake people in am's circle, he continues to be the only genuine, honest, and pure-hearted person - let's not take it for granted.

i imagine that after the tour ends all we'll have will be L&A's stories, specifically LV's stories where she'll position her phone so that we'll be able to see alex's elbow and lose our minds over it; and similar shenanigans. i am not looking forward to it. this community will be rotten for as long as those two will be present in the boys' lives (i wish it wouldn't be true, but everything has been going downhill since 2018/2019)

[cryingatships]

Parents in BMF

Sooo, Be My Favorite has been hitting too close to my heart since ep 1. But this ep topped it off ahaha I did not sign up for this where's the cutesy show I can watch without feeling anything

There's already been a lot of (frankly wonderful) discussions about it, but this stuff hits close to home so I had to write a bit, too. Prior warnings for (mostly) personal thoughts, disorderly ramblings, and discussions of homophobia.

About Kawi

We start off the series with saving Kawi's family as one of the goals. But what is 'family' to Kawi? Kawi gives us a lot of info about his background - He is poor (one of his main insecurities that plays into his sense of self), his mother has remarried and moved away, and his father is mortally ill.

From Kawi's words, it's clear that he is not at all close to his mother. So, he probably did not have a mother figure growing up. Did he even have a feminine figure he was close to throughout his childhood and adolescence? A playmate, a neighbour, an aunt? (Not really, I think)

Is that why he values his 'crush' so much?

A woman showed him kindness and interest for perhaps a very, very long time, in a foreign setting where he feels vulnerable, and he latched to it. Can't blame him for that. But that brings up an interesting possibility—The feelings Kawi has for Pear, are they of an inherently romantic nature? Or are they of some other kind, but which Kawi chooses to label as romantic, because he has little to no experience with female affection whatsoever?

Anyway, I was supposed to talk about Kawi's dad and got derailed.

So, Kawi's father.

Someone who loves Kawi a lot, as evident from his unwillingness to touch the fixed deposit he has because it is saved for Kawi's future. He refuses to get expensive treatment that is crucial for him to live him because he does not want to land Kawi in debt. (He also refused to talk about his disease in the initial eps, perhaps because he does not want his son to worry about him and affect his studies.)

So, Kawi at least had a positive father figure in his life. (who evetually becomes the reason why Kawi starts chasing his dreams!! Woot to healthy fathers in bls and in reality!)

But, it also makes me wonder, would Kawi's father accept the fact of him being a part of the queer community? Since BMF is a bl show, the answer is perhaps yes. (Though BMF is giving so many surprises each week I feel that this may just be hmmm... not true... hm... deep in delulu) But if this was in the real world, would he, an aged asian person with perhaps negligible knowledge about the queer community, learns that his so-far-straight son has suddenly 'turned gay' (using this term cause this is what I've heard ppl use irl when talking about their kids coming out...), be ok with it? Would he accept Kawi?

(I REALLY really wanna see Kawi coming out to his dad. LIke. Give it to meeee gmmtv.)

About Pisaeng

Contrasting Kawi's openness about his family (despite his insecurities about it), we have Pisaeng, who gives us no info about his family.

In all the prev eps, we got little mention of Pisaeng's family. And when we did, it was from Pear, saying that Pisaeng had a lonely childhood with no friends other than her and Not. (Which struck me as weird, cause Pisaeng, with his friendliness, ought to have many. making assumption about extroverts...i'm sorry. Ofc, we later learn the reason for this.)

Anyway, Pisaeng *does not* bring his family up, ever. He refuses to talk of the past. What could have happened back then?

In ep 6, finally, we get an idea.

It's Max, dearest Tired Queer who never fails us, who brings it up (the irony!)

But, even faced with the direct question, Pisaeng clams up and refuses to talk. (At this point I didn't realize what was happening it, just thought we were hating on politicians like we always ought to. And that Pisaeng's last name is very common in Thailand.)

And this wannabe politician lady is liberal enough on the media to have an out and proud queer person like Max follow her because he likes "what she says."

I need a breather cause this is so close to reality that it's nauseating

We later know that liberal politician lady is Pisaeng's mum. And all her liberal thoughts are just for the show. She employs people who are from the queer community but then uses them to spy on her son. (another breather needed asap)

Now, I wouldn't have realized this part if @bengiyo hadn't pointed this out in their post about how Pisaeng has been forced into the closet by his *liberal queer-supportive* mother, who also insists on controlling his life, his sexuality, and even his friends. Look at @jjsanguine's post on Pisaeng's mother and her view of frivolous friendships! It's soo... TwT. There *are* parents who insist their children don't make friends cause according to them the wrong sort of friends will get them into trouble in their future life (aka employment/career. Frick society and its- everything, actually.)

As much as I hate her for her horrible parenting, for her blatant lies about acceptability, and for using queers to hunt down their own community, and for being a politician (there's smt inherently wrong with ppl in politics, smt or the other, you can't convince me otherwise), I can't help but marvel how real her character is. Cause yeah, this stuff happens every day. I've seen others experience it, and I've experienced it myself.

That said, I can also see *where* Pisaeng's mum is coming from. (His name is so long I wanna call him Saeng but we got soo many Saeng's in bls recently ueue). As in the thought that drives their behaviour.

I think Pisaeng's mother operates on this—It's ok as long as it's not one of ours aka queerness in fine, as long as it's other people, as long as it does not affect our children.

I dunno about Thailand, but in my part of Asia, this is the often the *most* acceptability queers get. This, or outright homophobia. (breaths.)

Parents (ie the 'cool' ones) are ok with lgbt+ as long as their kids don't come out one day, or heavens forbid, bring a partner home. I do believe there are some parents who accept lgbt freely, but like, in my 19 yrs of experience, none of the parents (the ones who were ok enough to hold such a talk with in the first place) were. I hope some parents out there are more accepting :')

If you belong to a particularly liberal upper/upper middle class family, and you show your parent an lgbt ad, talk about the latest legislature that decriminalized homosexual relationships, or the ongoing court case about legalizing same sex marriage, they'll be ok with that. They'll nod their head and say 'progress'. (Though a lot more parents would beat you/inflict other kinds of abuse on you. Also honour killing.)

But heaven forbid their child becomes a part of that community. Then, there are talks of soothsayers, 'treatments', "it's just a phase", cutting off the child's friends and their access to phone cause they've been "badly influenced".

At the end, if the person still insists on being a part of queer community, the parents will force them to hide it. Not to tell anyone about it, to go back to the closet. Which is exactly what happened with Pisaeng. Only, Pisaeng's mother makes it worse (should there be a difference in levels of homophobia?) by using this pseudo acceptance for profit.

Their worry? The person's future. Their career, jobs, social standing. Because yes, even with legislatures, being queer can hamper one's access to education, health, and job opportunities, among many many other things. (To say nothing about the recent rise in hate crimes in my country...)

Often, this behaviour comes from parental love (a very twisted love that is), because most parents do not want their children to suffer, which they inevitably would if they lived their queer lives openly in the current social conditions.

But it also comes from prejudice, hate, and as urge to control. In many cases, parents refuse to accept their children have grown up, and are in a place to make their own decisions. Instead, they try to dictate every thought and every behaviour, including the choice of marital partners. (Ik arranged marriage au is often a thing of joke in the bl circle but, it's so real, guys. It happens way too often and tho it's mostly not a coercive thing... it sometimes is).

Also, surveillance. Parents often pry on phones, it's uncomfortably common place. I know a (not lgbt) friend whose parent had hired a private detective to spy on them cause they were afraid said friend would go into bars and get into drugs after entering uni.

So yeah. It's a circus. It'd be a funny one if this wasn't real life. >.>

So anyway anyway, Pisaeng's mother and her words made me think a lot sooo... I thought-dumped!

When I started watching BMF I thought it'd be a funny little show that would help me relax after a hectic week. Who knew it'd make me write so much about so many things. (I also blame Tumblr.)

This got wayy too personal at the end so like, congrats if you read till here. I kudos your patience for reading my disorganized mess of thoughts. Have a cookie/cupcake/chicken fritters(they are so! good!)/other food of your choice and I hope your weekend goes reallyy well!

ALso I hope Pisaeng's mother gets her just desserts. Even if she accepts him in the end, her past behaviour is horrible. And who knows if she won't use her financial and political power to harm the queer society later? People in power always under suspicion tbh

Also I just realized we have got nothing about Pisaeng's father...

[brionysea]

tbh i'm still not over the fact that it's canon Mike just randomly looked at El in the void like what what? huh? the sensing El in the void line up is literally just Henry (UD-hivemind + the Flayed), Will (after El touches his hand), Terry, Kali, and Mike. like. what is this line up? and it's not even like Mike was just a weird moment they retconned bc they actively call back to it in s3. and Mike is also the first one we see sense El against her will, the DG and Will in s1 only noticed her after she touched them. and then s2 starts and Mike ?sees? her in there, and suddenly everyone and their mother sees her in there and gives her jumpscare after jumpscare

really feels like the first instance is the odd one out like with Will's disappearance. (where there was no blood to lure the DG out etc. but we as the audience can't pick up on the weirdness right away because we don't even know how the DG works yet. can't tell something diverts from the rules if you don't know them yet etc etc) same with that line up where everyone has some form of psychic powers, except for Mike, but it's not that obvious right away bc he's the first one to ever do it. the audience can't tell whether this is weird or if everyone is able to do it. if it was the other way around and we had Henry and Kali and Terry look into the void at El for seasons and then Mike suddenly do it too in s4 ppl would call that insane right away. but bc Mike was the first to do it ppl didn't realize right away how out of place he would end up being on that list

(sorry this is a long ask oops, there's not a lot of blogs discussing how weird this is and it's genuinely fascinating to think about!)

no, you're right! it is fascinating

not to come back to my point of the weirdness with mike being hidden behind a misdirect of romance, but the weirdness with mike is being hidden behind a misdirect of romance. there was a pretty positive depiction of romantic el/mike in season 2, with most people still assuming mike was straight and that this story was going to be a typical one, so you're supposed to think that mike and el are soulmates and he can see her through the power of love or whatever, but even if the romantic aspect was true or their platonic bond just runs that deep, love doesn't give you superpowers. having superpowers gives you superpowers. that's it. max and el have such a strong connection but max didn't see el when she was watching them through the void in season 4. neither did lucas or dustin or anyone else, because none of these people have superpowers

and it's interesting that you point out el not really having as much control when mike saw her. with flayed-b*lly and terry, they both sensed her, initiated physical contact by grabbing her arm, and essentially pulled her into their mind. with will, el was trying to find his physical location so that wasn't needed, but physical contact was still made with the hand holding. with mike, el veeeery slowly reaches out in an attempt to initiate physical contact and enter his mind, presumably so they can talk for real without hopper knowing

and mike pulls away. the sound design lets you know it's a big deal with this ominous booming effect as he shuts the radio off, cutting off the connection

mike didn't let el in. there's something in his head he didn't want anyone to see, so she had to physically seek him out to give him a sign instead, which is way more inconvenient. if mike had just gone along with it then hopper wouldn't have even known they were communicating and that blowout argument that led to el running away probably never would've happened — at least not so soon — but that's a whole 'nother can of butterfly effects

all mike wanted to know was that el was okay. it would've worked out perfectly. he didn't need to keep her in his basement forever, he just wanted to know she was alive and out there somewhere. they could've had that if he'd just let her in, but he didn't. whatever inner turmoil he's keeping secret was more important to him

and all this makes his reaction to being spied on in season 3 a lot more significant, now that i think about it

[vaingloriosa]

as far as i know bryan dmed some underage connor nsfw ccs on tiktok (you probably know the genre) asking them not to post explicit things about connor. not sure what the nature of these messages were but the kids posted publicly in a panic after talking about how they were doing bad things and how sorry they were

rather than address things such as this publicly he is known for dming fans (at least i've seen him do it on a handful of occasions and know ppl he has messaged) to ask them to be quiet about certain things and not engage with certain people in the fandom

so it's basically a power play bc he knows he holds this status with the cult following he has with his fans (many of them underage) and he will use it to his advantage like that to get them to do what he wants

i've actually never seen anyone else be critical of them so it is so relieving to see you and the other anon. i really wonder who this top donor is. they used to have another one, not sure if she is still in the streams since she quit the fandom but she probably donated tens of thousands of dollars to them. she was your typical white karen and had a total meltdown over "losing her power" in the fandom before quitting, but she was very beloved to them and would tell bryan/his mod team abt accounts she didn't like or felt threatened by, someone standing up to her was what caused her meltdown and subsequently quitting. not surprised if she is still donating to them or if history repeats itself and they gained another wealthy worshipper

i would go off anon but i am personally familiar with how these people are behind their wholesome unproblematic facade and worry for my safety, honestly it is so relieving just to talk about this since i have been carrying it for so long 😭 have been seeing them on my feed way too much recently with the baby, the way people go crazy for heterosexuality is insane. i feel so sorry for their child and wish they would just shut up, drop this whole connor thing and move on with their lives. but i guess bc of wealthy white women like the other anon said it must be lucrative. goes to funding their million dollar properties on occupied land i guess!

yeah, he could’ve gone about that situation in a way different matter. I get trying to settle something privately if it was personal but if it was about not posting explicit things of his character, especially from underaged fans (which I agree, they shouldn’t be doing that), he should’ve addressed it publicly and not per person. a whole lot of labor and for what…

oughhh I’ve heard abt that infamous discord and priv chats which is mind boggling bc imagine creating a cult like environment for toxic positivity. a whistleblower told me about how some fans discussed the transphobia and homophobia in their daily lives on the discord and they were told by mods to stop being so “negative” and got threatened with being banned if they ever brought those topics up again. bryan gets his mods or whatever to do his dirty work and boy do they take their role to a whole other level 😭 also i don’t remember who also told me this but when someone on stream tried to correct bryan, he got really defensive and just laughed the person off. really wish i could find the message again bc i know it was something trivial but it was like a genuine criticism. if I find it, ilyk.

also insanity…why give your money to people that absolutely do not need it loll. this is from the same whistleblower and it broke my heart. the way bryan dechart encouraged this behavior is sickening.

awwweee im glad I could be a breathe of fresh air for youuuuu. absolutely vile that the repercussions of speaking out against the decharts could possibly mean a pack of wild dogs being sent to your location. what kind of community is that?! you can unload anytime, amigo, you’re safe here 🫶🏽 I applaud your bravery!! it took a lot of courage to even speak up about these concerns.

influencers who exploit their children are the scum of the earth and I hope these two don’t go down the route of using their own child for content 😐 if there is a baby cam on their stream, we are so cooked as a society I’m not even fucking kidding. every child should be shielded from the millions of eyes of the internet. we don’t need to see that! that’s between you and your partner (if there is one) and this goes for everyone tbh. like please protect your children from prying eyes…

anyways

[acourtofthought]

It hurts me to see so many Tamlin defenders these days it's all so triggering for me.

My parents relationship is exactly like what happened with Feyre but only the fact that she never got the chance to get out and she's still stuck and now it's too late. I see Feyre in my mother everyday but I live in a country and community that doesn't care for women opinion and they're considered as being "dramatic", "over-reacting" and "selfish". Exactly the things they call Feyre.

My mother knew while they were engaged that this wouldn't end well but her parents didn't listen to her and they said you should marry him and fix him, bring him children he will be better... bc my father been through some traumatic stuff as well. (Honestly while I was reading acotar and acomaf, I find it a cruel joke) So that was the way to justify his actions. And bc my mother didn't wants us to hate him, she would say this to us as well that it's not his fault but we grow up and we realised this isn't normal as much as he wants to claim he's traumatised. (Sounds familiar?)

my mother gave and gave and gave but never received anything from him still receives nothing from him. And you know what he does to make her shut up and don't complain? He buys her things or for us. He used to pay for my grandparents treatment. Just like Tamlin who paid for Feyre's family to keep her were she is so she wouldn't leave him.

My mother can't go out without being questioned that where is she going, how long she's out, when will she come back? She doesn't have a job!!! And the fact that he's doing it to me and my sibling as well is also very disheartening... I can't go out with my friends without being questioned bc its dangerous outside and you don't know what's coming for you... (I'm being serious this is exactly his words)

And he never hit us or hurt us in physical way that is visible, he hits with his word how he degrade my mother and sometimes us. So no one really sees what we've been through no one believe us bc there's no evidence of it...

And knowing that ppl don't even consider Tamlin an abuser but just a misunderstood character and deserving better treatment from readers while the ppl around him suffered? Yeah... its feels like people are not seeing us just bc he's hot or have money or is powerful or whatever...

I wonder if someone tells them they're overreacting and being dramatic how they would feel? To not be seen and tell them "you're acting childish suck it up"? How would they feel?

And only bc you did some nice things doesn't make you less of an abuser we need to remind that to ourselves... (just bc tamlin help in a war HE CREATED (bc he thought Feyre was his trophy) and help Rhysand to live doesn't make him less of a shitty person that he is...)

ps: this is just my experience I know for a fact that a lot of ppl experienced worse than us. its okay if you ignore this but I only wanted to get this out somewhere that might some ppl see and rethink what they're saying...

First, I'm honored you shared your story with me and I am so sorry that both you and your mother are still in such a difficult situation. It's easy for someone on the outside looking in to say, "why doesn't she just leave already?" but anyone who has first hand experience of what she's going through (either because they have witnessed a love one going through it or they themselves have) know how difficult it can actually be to walk away. They might be struggling with years of their significant other chipping away at their self esteem to the point that they truly don't think they are worth more than the treatment they've gotten, they might be in a position where they can't set off on their own for financial reasons, they might fear for what the significant other might do if they were to leave. And I do understand why, as you are currently living this, it is triggering for you to see people romanticize Tamlin or explain away his behaviors as "he was struggling so he couldn't help himself." Of course he was struggling however, that never gives someone the right to take their struggles out on others. I don't think we'll ever be able to stop those who are fans of the Justice for Tamlin rhetoric but hopefully you take some comfort in knowing that the author herself has been vocal about how wrong Tamlin's behavior was. Others can interpret the text however they want but at the end of the day, SJM, the creator of his character has told us that he is a toxic male, that the High Lord of Spring is a "douche" and I think that's all that should matter to you. You feel his behaviors were not acceptable and the one who wrote him agrees. I'm not necessarily opposed to seeing Tamlin begin to heal but I personally don't think he's redeemed himself at all at this point and I have no interest in seeing him fall in love again, regardless of his one "heroic" gesture in the war. He still physically assaulted his friend afterwards and threw Lucien's clothes on his front door. A year after the war and he's still making no effort to try and be the High Lord his people need. It's not that someone who was abusive doesn't deserve the opportunity to better themselves but I don't think they deserve forgiveness until there are actual steps being taken to actually better themselves. Since Tamlin still, as of SF, has not made any progress in the right direction, I understand why it's frustrating when excuses are being made for his behavior. Again, I am so sorry that you and your family are going through this. Growing up in that situation often effects our own relationships and self esteem and I hate that you have become a victim in something you never had any say in. Sending you lots of love ❤️

[xxclutch45xx]

You know, it occurs to me that I've never come out officially on this site. There's a lot to talk about, including the fact thatmy previous experience on here, around a decade ago if I remember right, made me afraid to come out at all. The people I had encountered made it very clear that my experiences weren't valid or real in trans spaces, and I didn't even interact directly with anyone. I so often saw them telling off other ppl who were trying to explore the same things I needed to explore, so I simply was too terrified I wouldnt be accepted in any gender conconforming space. But at this point, all these years later, I have a much more solid understanding of who I am and how to avoid certain types of ppl, the ones who think gatekeeping is in any way positive to any community. All of this to say, I've DONE my self exploration, and I know how I feel, even if I don't necessarily know what the correct term for it is.

So, for the time being, I use the term Genderfluid. I know some days I feel more fem and others more masc. I never feel FULLY masc, I definitely have a more feminine lean if that makes sense. I've been using genderfluid for a few years now, and though it diesnt feel like anything special necessarily, it also doesnt feel GROSS AND WRONG. I still have more exploring to do, but my living situation kinda wont allow it, so I'm a bit stuck currently.

Hopefully this helps people get to know me a bit better, if I still have active followers that is... I haven't noticed much activity sonce returning to the site other than bots constantly following me.

Oh, and as for pronouns... I don't really know what ones I want to use. I enjoy she/her, I use he/him only at cetain times, but I've been curious about neopronouns. I'll have to see how they feel, testing them is very difficult in my current situation.

[tomwambsgans]

could you expand a bit more on your theory of what happened to greg's dad? so far it seems super interesting

so it's def not something i thought of independently, i've seen similar musings in other ppl's posts (though idk if i've reblogged any of em and idk exactly who has said what) but here's the rundown of my thinking, particularly about the "your father used to sleep with all the men in sausalito" line:

it's likely referring to either prior to greg's birth or very very early on in greg's life, which would have been in the late 80s and/or early 90s

sausalito is basically right across from san francisco, which is/was THE gay man hub and which therefore had some of the most known cases of HIV during the AIDS crisis. which was the era that greg's dad was apparently having a lot of casual sex

also if caroline was there to know that her niece-in-law's baby daddy was not only gay but actively, functionally so, and laughs about it directly to greg like it's not some secret at all, then it stands to be assumed that their relationship was at the very least open and most likely never serious to begin with.

add this to connor telling greg about his mom sitting on the lap of gore vidal who is famously bisexual, giving her a track record of hanging around mlm. she was def the kinda girl who went to gay bars back in the day. anyway

going from there, personally i've come to the conclusion that, whatever motivated it - mr. hirsch thinking for a sec he might be bi, or him actually being incidentally bi, or just drunkenness and random fun - greg was born out of more or less a hookup that tied his parents together out of obligation.

given that greg never mentions the guy and looks explicitly uncomfortable when caroline says the sausalito line, i have to then also assume that greg's dad wasn't a positive figure in his life. which, based on how greg is, i can only imagine being the case if the guy just wasn't in it. then add THAT to allusions made to viruses particularly re: greg multiple times in the show.... basically it all creates a big steaming pot of, both functionally in-universe and as meta symbolism, It's Very Plausible Greg's Dad Died Of AIDS-Related Complications.

also imo i feel like even before dying the guy was probably not super present? like i do want to think that he made an effort to stay in greg's life but then, that he'd have been pretty unhappy trying to Make It Work with marianne so he didn't try to pretend to be anyone he wasn't. and the man he was was a bit of a whore. and i also figure that they were living in california before greg was born, and then marianne probably moved back to canada to be near ewan sometime shortly after, so if mr hirsch moved there with her, he wouldn't even have had nearly as much community up there as he def liked to have.

..point is, i think he planned on being a dad just as little as marianne planned on being a mom if not less. and he maybe didn't have it in him to settle down and make fatherhood his full time thing even assuming that he did love greg.

ntm ewan probably hated greg's dad's guts and didn't like the idea of him taking part in raising greg if he was also gonna be openly gay (especially if he was diagnosed with HIV and if ewan knew about it), which would make it a good chance that he was a factor in the guy only visiting sometimes at best and never bringing male partners with him.

so long story short i'm not like 100% set on it as a greg's dad backstory but i think it would make greg's behavior (especially as it relates to greg himself being gay) make a lot if not the most possible sense

[myjunkisyuzuruhanyu]

Correct me if I'm wrong, but weren't there some nasty fs rivalries like a decade ago and that had been the norm? And Yuzu was one of the reasons (either intentionally or unintentionally) it changed to how everyone is so respectful and friendly now so it's a much more pleasant atmosphere? So basically, by trying to promote a make believe nasty rivalry between Yuzu and Shoma/Nathan, they're disrespecting the work Yuzu has done to stop that?

I follow figure skating for some time and actually my overall view was that since I follow it, the rivalry narrative has been mostly created by media and some fans. I follow skating roughly since 2009. I think the most drama is always created by fans not the skaters themselves.

Though ofc there are those old scandals ppl know about like the Tonya Harding story in the 90s or how Plushenko and Yagudin both openly stated that they hate each other while they were competitors. Also how Plushenko didn't respect him finishing behind Lysacek in 2010 and how he stepped on first place first before getting to his position. Yeah there definitely were also other times.

I think though that those extremes were rare and not the norm, but as I didn't follow skating closely then I cannot really tell. I mean even nowadays it's not about how everyone is friends and everyone gets along with everyone, that would be a lie. It's not true. And ofc there are rivalries in training groups and at competitions, but my overall impression is that it's seldomly nasty. I think in the end skaters all are much aware of the sacrifices that everyone has to go through and everyone knows how hard this sport is and how politics influence competitions etc. So with sharing those experiences you can see a bond. It's told by many skaters that the skating community is like a family. And though it's through a social media lense you can see how they often support each other, how they post pictures with one another. I don't think that's fake.

Yuzu is special in many ways. I think how Yuz treats his fellow competitors is mainly rooted in his own experience with haters and ofc his own personality. Yuzu had his own share of bad experience with fans in 2012 Nationals when he beated Daisuke Takahashi, the most popular Japanese skater at that time, and they booed Yuzu for winning. (though ofc there are fans who dement that this has ever been the case, there is video evidence though) I think Yuzu at that point decided that he didn't want anyone get through the same thing and this is why he has always been very supportive of his juniors and also always has been very respectful to the other skaters, especially the winners. I think especially shown his attitude in Nationals 2019 with his own disappointment but still he had only positive words to say about Shoma and even said he was happy for him. A moment I will cherish forever as a fan of Yuzu and Shoma. ❤️

I do think you are right that Yuzu helped create an environment of respect for other skaters. And yes if toxic fans would actually respect Yuzu and listen to his words, they would not act like that. I am not sure if you can really say Yuzu is the reason it became friendlier off-ice, but surely Yuzu was the one to make sure the rivalries he was involved were friendly and respectful and this definitely had an impact on the new generation of skaters. Yuzu does have quite an influence even inside the skating community so I am sure his way helped.

I think a major problem is that the skaters are very much aware of the hatred by fans. Even already back in October 2017 it was reported by newspapers about the fanwars between Yuzu and Shoma fans and Yuzu was quoted saying, that he doesn't like to talk about Shoma much because he wants to protect him from the haters. At another point Yuzu also said he doesn't like to say much about Shoma because his words get twisted to hurt Shoma. Shoma also said at one point "hate me all you want". So it's sad to see that though Yuzu even said things like that it doesn't get respected by his own fans.

Imo toxic fans aren't real fans. Those ppl are attention seekers and trouble makers. I think they are miserable with their own life and cannot tolerate other ppl being happy about things they don't like as they think their opinion is the only one valid. I think a lot of toxic Fanyus are actually only Fanyus because Yuzu has the most fans atm, because he won a lot of titles and because he is unproblematic because he does not share his personal life or opinions on it at all. It's easy to make someone a saint and godlike figure because obviously he doesn't have any flaws according to them. So everyone else in comparison ofc cannot stand against their god. They completely neglect Yuzuru Hanyu the human being who obviously also has flaws, who isn't always perfect, who won't always win, who makes mistakes. I don't deny that they may like his skating too, but I think being this loud and toxic is just for attention and not because they care about Yuzu the human. If they would care they would respect his work, his words about other skaters, accept his flaws and defeat (when he can accept that he lost, why can't they?) and respect his friends and rivals. But they care only for themselves.

The problem with toxic fans on Twitter is that they are not a minority anymore, which is changing the perception of the fandom. Twitter has a general problem with cancel culture in many different fandoms. The more attention those toxic fans get, the more it becomes the norm of how Yuzu fans act, because apparently if a lot of ppl do it, it's ok. (though obviously it's not.) There are accounts that actively create a picture of Yuzu being the victim of everyone and everything and everyone new asking will only get their version. The problem with the "Fanyu cult" is that they actively go after accounts not buying their narratives, they bullied some ppl into deleting their accounts, sometimes even among their own (like Iron_Klaus for example).

I am not sure if the fandom really got more toxic or if I am just more aware of what is going on in the fandom. Fanwars were always a thing I fear. I think the one I first experienced was the Mao Asada vs Yuna Kim aera. I always liked them both equally so when I got more into the fandom I was quite shocked to see the vicious attacks on both sides of fans. There was also some very nasty time when Evgenia Medvedeva rose in the ranks and beated Yuna Kim's records. And also before her when Adelina Sotnikova won against Yuna Kim in Sochi 2014 (imo it should not have happened and this may be my biggest grudge ever, but there is no reason to send death threats to Sotnikova).

Though generally I fear any fandom always has their share of really bad fans who aren't interested in creating a friendly environment but are only keen on getting their own points across, no matter how disrespectful or hateful their opinion is. It sadly is human nature that there are a lot of bad unhappy ppl in the world and some ppl only find attention in fandom.

Just for clarification I don't think Yuzu is at fault for what his toxic fans do. And actually I don't even think it would help if Yuzu would say something about it. It's not in his control. I think it's very sad that fans are turned off from the fandom or Yuzu as a skater because of what his toxic fans do. And imo as skaters can see the hate and use the sns themselves and google their own name even, it also isolates Yuzu within the skating community, I fear that skaters cannot be with Yuzu freely without fearing being attacked (just look at what happened to Boyang Jin and Misha Ge when they shared pictures with Yuzu they got harassed as attention seekers. Or how Andrei Mozalev allegedly got death threats because he apparently was at fault for the hole in the ice that caused Yuzu to pop his 4S.) (Edit: it was brought to my attention that there is no actual proof of fans sending death threats, so maybe it is exaggerated, but Mozalev definetly got his share of bad comments and direct messages sended to him on Istagram, so make up your own mind if true or not)

I am sorry if this reply is a bit messy, but there are a lot of thoughts on this topic and those fanwars are time consuming and annoying and drain the fun sometimes to the point of thinking if it is worth it. 😔

[destinyc1020]

I’ll bite. I’m a Z fan who likes her with Tom now. Initially I can’t lie, I was glad she was with JE or even the rumors about JDW. Tom felt like such a school boy, bouncing everywhere and Z was moving into her “adult” era, JE seemed to compliment that more serious and artistic vibe she had - and yea they looked better paired. Nowadays while I like Tom some what I will admit that sometimes he still seems very young boy compared to her woman which isn’t helped by the height. On my worst opinion days it feels like he is far behind in every category.

Thank you Anon for your honesty. I'm glad you're at least being HONEST lol. 😂

I'm pretty sure that's probably how a LOT of Z fans feel (or USED to feel at some time) tbh. 🤷🏾‍♀️ I really think some ppl have some really warped views of celebrities or smthg lol. 🥴

I think ppl make judgements when they don't really know someone on the public eye, and the judgments are usually negative until they get to know MORE about the person. I'll admit, I've been guilty of it too! 🤷🏾‍♀️

But once I've spent more time in someone's fandom, and get to know more about them (either through fans, fan encounters, or just their interviews and whatnot), my view of them starts to change..... usually for the positive. 😌

With Tom, I personally feel like he CAN be serious? I've seen him be serious before. I mean, he's the son of a comedian for goodness sakes lol, so he's going to have jokes and a sense of humor, and I think Zendaya LOVES that about him! 😂

I actually don't think she would like being with a guy who's TOO serious or uptight... 👀 I know I personally wouldn't. I prefer light-hearted, EASY-going guys. No drama or up and down attitudes for me please no. I dated a guy who was like that (up and down all the time) and it was a nightmare 🥴 I was so attracted to him, but in the end, he was just a downer! I vowed never to be with a guy like that ever again lol. I can't do the up and down rollercoaster, or guys who take themselves TOO seriously. 🥴

I think that's why I didn't really think that she and Big Foot were a good match. He just always seemed like he took himself TOO seriously, and was always on a foul mood lol 😆 Now, I could be totally WRONG and way off base about him, but that's just the VIBE that he puts out to me. Idk the dude personally, so again my perception could be way off base, and I'm perfectly happy to admit that. 🤷🏾‍♀️

Z is def in her "grown woman" era, but I think that Tom is in his "grown man" era as well now. Women DO mature faster than guys lol... But hey, sometimes opposites attract! 😃 You don't want someone TOO much like you lol. That's kinda boring? You want a guy/person who can teach you things, make you look at things differently, open you up, allow you to be completely YOURSELF. One thing about Tom is that he's very confident in himself, and he is just who he is regardless. 🤷🏾‍♀️ That's a very attractive trait. I'm sure that allows her to be 100% herself as well! 😌

I just don't understand why ppl police us black women and who we find attractive so much! It's ANNOYING!! 😤🥴 Leave us alone my gosh lol. 😂 Everyone's always got an opinion on who we like, date, smash, or find attractive. 😒 Even in the black community! Like, can't we just LIVE and love in PEACE?? Geez! Let us thirst in peace please lol 😆

I think Z is with the right guy for her who makes her "the happiest"! 🥰❤