#but it’s not *just* an intrusive thought bc intrusive thoughts aren’t usually referencing a memory or a rational response to any situation
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lightblueminecraftorchid · 4 months ago
Text
Me: oh good I finished my job tasks for the week and made some good progress on my capstone-
Brain: hey remember that PhilosophyTube video about abuse
Me: yeah I think Abigail made some rly good points-
Brain: yeah yeah yeah ANYWAY u need to hold still and be so quiet and make no messes. just in case.
Me: In case of what?? Nobody is home.
Brain: JUST IN CASE. in case somebody gets mad at you.
Me: but literally nobody is home?????
Brain: Doesn’t matter. someone Will Be Soon. ur dad probably. go hide in ur room hurry hurry it’s late and he’s probably stressed-
Me: it’s not even 3pm and I do not live with my dad what the actual fuck are u talking about
Brain: JUST IN CASE!!!!!!
#blue chatter#idk what to call this tbh#it’s not a flashback I don’t think#bc I’m aware that the memory I’m referencing isn’t current reality#I know logically that I’m safe and where I am and what my surroundings are#I know that my brain is wrong and this response isn’t rational#I have a probably trigger for what caused it (Abigail’s descriptions of emotional abuse by her ex in her video)#but it’s not *just* an intrusive thought bc intrusive thoughts aren’t usually referencing a memory or a rational response to any situation#intrusive thoughts are distressing bc they come out of nowhere and disturb the person thinking them#but I don’t just feel anxious or distressed#I feel anxious or distressed because at one point in time I did need to do those things#I did need to hide in my room and clean up my messes and not make any noise so I wouldn’t get noticed#among several other things#so like. if it’s more than an intrusive thought but less than a flashback what do u call it.#would love input from somebody who like. has experienced this also.
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