#but it just made him look like he had a piercing
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Sweet Revenge—Salesman x Fem!Reader
summary— A heated argument with the salesman, the smug Squid Game recruiter, turns into a rough and unexpected night of fucking, leaving you questioning your entire life choices.
warnings— enemies to lovers, arguing, fingering, degradation, praise kink, face slapping, choking, hair pulling, rough sex, unprotected sex, creampie, slight aftercare.
The knock on the hotel door was loud and sharp. The Salesman, ever composed, adjusted his tie before opening it, expecting room service instead, he found you.
You stood there, furious, with a fire in your eyes that caught him off guard. “You didn’t think I’d fucking find you, did you?” you spat, stepping inside without waiting for an invitation.
He closed the door calmly, his lips curling into that infuriating smirk. “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t curious about what brought you here.”
“You know exactly why I’m here,” you hissed, looking up at him. “You ruined lives. Mine included. I want answers.”
He tilted his head, his expression as unreadable as usual. “I gave you a choice, didn’t I? Everyone who plays has a choice.”
“Don’t give me that shit. You knew what you were doing. You preyed on desperate people. And now, you’re going to pay for it,” you snapped, hands clenched into fists.
His laugh was low and soft, infuriatingly amused. “And how exactly do you plan to make me pay?”
Your breath hitched as he stepped closer, his presence overwhelming. “B-by holding you accountable,” you managed, though your voice wavered.
“If that’s what you want, then go ahead. But something tells me this isn’t just about revenge,” he leaned down, his voice a murmur.
You hated how his confidence pissed you off, how his piercing gaze seemed to strip you naked. You hated how cocky he was.
“Stop fucking playing games,” you demanded.
“But sweetheart, games are what I do best,” he replied, his smirk deepening. “Tell me, are you here to hurt me or for something else?”
You hated him. You hated his arrogance, his calm demeanor, the way he seemed untouchable. But more than that, you hated the way he looked at you, like he knew exactly how much power he had over you.
“Shut up,” you snapped, grabbing his tie and pulling him down to your level. His eyes widened just slightly before his smirk returned. “No more games. No more excuses. You don’t get to control this anymore.”
For a moment, he seemed to consider your words. Then, in one swift motion, he closed the space between you, his lips capturing yours. It was fierce and unrelenting, a battle for control neither of you wanted to lose. You shoved him back, your chest heaving as you glared at him. “You think this fixes everything?”
“No,” he said, his eyes darkening. “But I think you’re acting like a bitch because you haven’t been properly fucked.”
His hands found your waist, pulling you closer as your resistance faltered. You hated him, truly, deeply hated him. But your body betrayed you, melting into his touch, craving more of what you couldn’t admit you wanted.
The kiss was so hot, igniting a storm of emotions you couldn’t tame. His lips moved against yours with a roughness that made your head spin. You pressed closer, your fingers tangling in his neatly styled hair, ruining the composure he seemed to hold onto so tightly.
But he wasn’t just kissing you, the asshole was claiming you. His hands roamed with purpose, sliding down your back before gripping your ass firmly. Then, his fingers hiked your dress higher.
The sound of fabric tearing ripped through the air, and you gasped, pulling back just enough to glare at him. “What the fuck?”
He smirked, holding up the remnants of your thong like a trophy. “Who did you wear this for?”
“Shut up,” you shot back, your voice trembling with frustration and something else.
“Oh, I see,” he murmured, leaning closer. “You wore it for me, didn’t you? My desperate little slut couldn’t help herself.”
Before you could retort, his hand slid between your thighs, rough fingers finding your pussy. You gasped again, your hands clutching at his shoulders as he thrust two fingers inside without warning.
“Motherfuck—”
“Quiet,” he commanded, his. “You’ll take what I give you like the slut you are. Isn’t that what you wanted?”
His fingers moved in sharp, unrelenting thrusts, each movement pushing you closer to the edge. “You’re such a mess,” he taunted, his other hand gripping your throat to make you look at him. “All this attitude, and for what? You’ve been waiting for me to just ruin you, haven’t you?”
You bit your lip, refusing to answer, but your body betrayed you, drenching his fingers and fluttering around them. He chuckled, clearly pleased by your reaction.
“Come on,” he taunted, his thrusts quickening. “Let me hear you say it slut. Tell me how badly you wanted this.”
“Fuck, I—” your words broke with a moan, unable to fight the pleasure building inside you.
“Say it,” he demanded, his voice leaving no room for argument.
“Fine!” you cried out, your resolve crumbling. “I wanted it, okay? I wanted this!”
“Good girl,” he murmured, a satisfied smirk on his face. His fingers moved impossibly faster, pushing you right to the brink. “Now, don’t hold back. Let me see you cum.”
And unfortunately, you did. Your body shook as the coil snapped, waves of pleasure crashing over you. He didn’t stop, drawing out every last tremor until you were left trembling in his arms.
When you finally caught your breath, he leaned in, pressing a kiss to your neck. “That’s my good fucking slut,” he whispered.
You lifted your palm and the moment your hand connected with his face, the sound of the slap echoed in the room. His head tilted slightly from the force, but the reaction wasn’t what you expected. The salesman didn’t look angry. Nah, he looked, amused?
A dark chuckle left his lips, and his gaze locked with yours, sharp. “Again,” he said, his voice taunting.
Your chest heaved with frustration, your fingers trembling, but you raised your hand and slapped him again. This time, the impact left a faint flush on his cheek. He didn’t flinch. Instead, he smirked, that expression driving you to the edge.
“Feel better now?” he teased, his tone filled with mockery.
“Go to hell,” you spat, but before you could say more, he grabbed your wrist and spun you around with little effort.
“Careful,” he murmured against your ear as he pushed you onto the bed, your stomach pressing into the mattress. His weight settled over you, keeping you firmly in place. “You might make me think you enjoy this.”
Your breath hitched as you felt the press of his bulge against you. The sound of his belt unbuckling sent a jolt of anticipation through your body, though you refused to let him see it.
“Don’t even,” you warned, your voice trembling as you turned your head slightly to glare at him.
“Still talking back,” he muttered, his hands gripping your hips firmly. “I’m going to ruin that little pussy of yours.”
“You’re so full of—”
Before you could finish, he leaned down, his breath hot against your ear. “Go ahead,” he growled. “Say something else. Curse me out. I love it”
“Fuck you jackass,” you hissed, trying to wriggle free, but his grip only tightened.
“Good girl,” he mocked, his voice dripping with amusement. “You’re so predictable. So easy to rile up. But I know what you really want.”
“You don’t know anything,” you snapped, but your defiance faltered when he pushed against you harder, his body flush against yours.
“You’re shaking,” he whispered. “Is it fear or excitement? Maybe both?”
Your heart raced and you shuddered as he pressed a kiss to the back of your neck. “Don’t fight it, sweetheart. You and I both know this is exactly what you were begging for.”
He didn’t wait any longer. His hands gripped your hips firmly, pulling you back on his hard cock as he pushed forward. The sound of his sharp intake of breath filled the air as he settled into a rhythm, steady at first but quickly turning into thrusts that were rough and relentless.
“You fucking feel that?” he murmured. “This is what your little pussy has been begging for, isn’t it?”
Your breath hitched, your fingers curling into the bedsheets. “I—” you tried to protest, but the words stuck in your throat as he fucked you faster, each thrust sending a spark of pleasure up your spine.
“You can’t even speak,” he mocked, a dark chuckle vibrating against the back of your neck as he leaned down. “What happened to all that attitude, huh?”
“Shut up,” you hissed, trying to hold on to some semblance of control, but the way he pounded you, relentless, purposeful, was breaking you down.
“Oh no, sweetheart,” he said as he pressed kisses along your neck, his teeth grazing your skin making you shiver. “You’re not in charge anymore. You’re mine. My slut.”
Your defiance wavered as a moan slipped from your lips, louder than you intended. His hand slid around your waist, pressing against your lower stomach, holding you steady as he angled his cock deeper.
“That’s it,” he growled. “Good girl. Taking my dick so well.”
You squeezed your eyes shut, the pleasure overwhelming as he kept his pace steady but unforgiving. “F-fuck,” you breathed, your voice shaking.
“What is it, sweetheart?” he teased, his lips brushing against your ear. “You want more? Say it.”
Your pride battled with your desire, but the way he stretched your pussy, the way he spoke to you, it was too much. “Yes,” you gasped, your voice barely above a whisper. “Harder.”
“I didn’t hear you,” he said, a smirk evident in his voice.
“Harder!” you cried out, your hands gripping the sheets as he complied, his thrusts turning harder, deeper.
“There she is,” he murmured, his lips trailing kisses down your neck, his free hand tangling in your curls. “That’s my slut. So pretty like this, falling apart for me.”
“I—I can’t!” you cried, your body betrayed you, your legs trembling as he pushed you closer to the edge.
“Yes, you can,” he encouraged, his tone softening just slightly. “Give it to me. I want to feel you cum.”
And then it happened. A surge of bliss so overwhelming it left you a moaning mess, your body trembling beneath him as you soaked the sheets and his cock. He moaned deeply, his movements faltering as he chased his own orgasm.
“Good girl,” he praised, his voice low and breathless as he kissed the back of your neck, holding you close as he came, ropes and ropes of his cum spilling into you.
The room fell silent except for the sound of your ragged breaths, and as he finally emptied every drop of cum in you, he pressed a soft kiss to your shoulder. “You were perfect,” he murmured, his hand stroking your back as he pulled you into his arms, his lips brushing against your forehead.
What the hell had just happened? What did you just do? You’d crossed a line, broke a boundary you didn’t even realize existed until now.
“Fuck you,” you muttered, your voice filled with embarrassment and disbelief.
The salesman only chuckled as his fingers gently traced circles along your bare skin. “That’s not what you were saying a few minutes ago,” he teased.
You scoffed, covering your face with your hands as if that would erase what just happened, or his cum still swirling in your pussy. “Oh my God,” you whispered, more to yourself than to him. “What the fuck did I just do?”
He pulled back slightly to turn you toward him. His eyes were dark but warm, his smirk still in place as he brushed a strand of hair from your face. “You lived a little,” he said, his voice gentler now. “And let me tell you—you can take dick.”
You glared at him, though the effect was dulled by the way your body heated up. “Shut up,” you snapped, shoving at his chest weakly.
He only laughed, pulling you tighter against him. “You’ll thank me later,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to your temple.
You lay there in his arms, your mind racing as the reality of what just happened settled over you. How had you let this happen? How had he managed to get under your skin like this? The weight of what you’d just done was impossible to ignore, but as he held you close, his steady presence and casual confidence made it hard to fully regret it, no matter how much you wanted to.
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asking bsf!rafe to take your virginity
cw: rafe x fem!reader, best friends to lovers, soft dom!rafe, first time, kissing, fingering, praise, p in v (protected), degradation, fluffy, i got a little carried away so it’s kinda long..whops
“so that’s why you’re acting all akward ‘n shit?” rafe asked, leaning back against the headboard of his bed, his piercing blue eyes fixed on you. his tone was calm, though curiosity and concern laced his words. you nodded, pulling your knees to your chest as you sat cross-legged on his bed. “yea…that’s it,” you muttered, heat creeping up your cheeks. “it’s stupid, i know.”
“it’s not stupid,” rafe said immediately, his brows furrowing. “but seriously, y/n… that’s the only reason?”, “yes..” you admitted, feeling embarrassed. “and i already get it, okay? you can save your dumb jokes and make fun of me later, just like the girls did.”
rafe’s expression softened. “you think i’m gonna make fun of you? c’mon, i’m not an asshole.” you glanced at him, the sincerity in his voice easing your nerves slightly. “it’s just—” you sighed, running a hand through your hair in frustration. “i feel like a complete loser. i mean, almost 20 and still a virgin? how pathetic is that?”
“it’s not pathetic,” rafe said firmly, his voice steady. “why would it even matter? it’s not like there’s a deadline for this stuff.” you huffed, “you don’t get it,” frustration bubbling up again. “it’s not just that. tay and jill were sitting there, sharing their stories, and i couldn’t say anything. i felt like a freaking clueless kid, rafe. i don’t want to feel like that anymore. i just…i just want it to be over with already.”
rafe studied you carefully, his jaw tightening as he thought over your words. “y/n,” he started, his voice gentle but firm, “you don’t have to rush into something just because—”
“then you do it,” you blurted out, words tumbling from your lips before you could stop yourself. the room went completely silent, and you immediately regretted how direct you had been, cheeks burning as you looked at rafe, his eye wide and face turning pale as he processed what you’d just said.
“wait—what?” he asked, his voice cracking slightly, though he quickly recovered, “are you serious?” you swallowed hard, heart racing, but instead of chickening out, you met his gaze. “yea, I’m serious,” you said, “i don't want it to be with some random guy, and i don't want to feel like this anymore. i want it to be with someone i trust. and you’re the only person I trust, rafe.“
he blinked, processing what you were asking for. and for a moment, he didn’t know what to say. you were his best friend, the one person he’d always been closest to, and now you were asking him to take your virginity. a million thoughts ran through his head, but one stood out; the idea of being your first didn’t just excite him—it drove him fucking wild. yet he tried to compose himself.
“y/n…” he began, feeling his resolve crumbling under the weight of your words. “are you sure about this? i mean, i don’t want you to regret anything.” you nodded, “i’m sure,” fidgeting with your shirt, “i trust you, rafe. i wouldn’t ask if i didn’t.”
he hesitated, the weight of your trust settling over him. “you’re really serious about this,” he murmured, more to himself than to you. “i am,” you said, leaning forward slightly, your eyes locked on his. “you’re the person I feel the safest with, ray. please, teach me.”
the way you said it—the trust in your voice, the vulnerability—made his heart race. he swallowed hard, his throat dry, and nodded slightly. "okay," he murmured, leaning closer, his eyes piercing through yours.
rafe moved slowly, giving you every opportunity to back out. his hand cupped your cheek as he leaned in, your lips brushing only softly at first. but as you responded, your hands finding their way to his shoulders, the kiss deepened, growing more intense.
your breaths mingled, and rafe's hands moved to your waist, guiding you gently as he eased you back onto the bed. "tell me if you want to stop," he whispered against your lips, his voice low and warm.
"i won't," you assured him, biting your lip in anticipation. even though you felt super nervous, rafe’s presence calmed you down, his touch sending sparks through you. just then his fingers paused at the hem of your shirt, looking up at you with soft eyes, "can i...?"
"yes," you whispered. rafe slid the fabric up slowly, his movements deliberate and respectful. every step, every touch, was cautious, ensuring you were comfortable. he tossed the shirt aside, followed by your shorts, going until you were bare. his hands grazed your skin, pulling back slightly to take in your naked form, his breath catching in his throat.
he had seen you in bikinis countless times before, even underwear, but this—this was entirely different. the soft curves of your body, the delicate flush of your skin, the way your chest rose and fell with every nervous breath—he was utterly captivated. the fact that you had chosen him to be your first left him star-struck, a mixture of awe and protectiveness washing over him.
he swallowed hard, his fingers brushing lightly over your skin as though afraid to break you. his voice was thick with emotion as he murmured, "you're fucking perfect." you gave him a small, shy smile, your hands fidgeting slightly at your sides. rafe leaned down, kissing your shoulder, your collarbone, and the curve of your neck.
he could feel you relax beneath him, your body responding to his every move. when he reached just at your lower stomach, he paused, looking up at you with quiet intensity. "you tell me if anything feels wrong, okay?" you nodded, your heart racing. "mhm."
rafe’s hand slid lower, his fingers brushing against the sensitive spot between your thighs, rubbing your clit in soft circles. the contact made you gasp, and he froze for a second, searching your face for any sign of hesitation. when he saw none he continued, his touch gentle and deliberate.
“it might feel weird or sting a little, okay? but I’ll be gentle, i promise.” he worked slowly, his fingers softly brushing through your slick folds before pushing one past your entrance. your breath hitched, winching slightly as his thick digit thrusted in and out of you, soon each motion eased the slight pain into something far more enjoyable.
rafe couldn't help but smile softly at your reactions, pride swelling in his chest as he watched you fall apart beneath his touch. "you’re doing so good," he cooed, his voice low and soothing.
your hands gripped the sheets, breaths coming faster, your head tipping back as waves of sensation washed over you. rafe stayed completely focused on you, his own desire burning inside him, but he pushed it aside. this wasn't about him. it was about you—your pleasure, your comfort, your first time being something you would never regret.
just as you felt yourself fall completely into it rafe removed his fingers from your weeping cunt, making you whine at the sudden loss of his touch. “shit, really can’t wait, can ya?” he teased, removing his own clothes before grabbing a condom from his wallet, pumping his cock a few times before rolling it down his shaft.
your breath caught in your throat as rafe stood before you, fully bare. you had expected to feel shy or embarrassed, but instead, an overwhelming sense of awe washed over you. he was perfect. his lean, sculpted body was like something out of a dream, every muscle defined, every line sharp, a literal walking god. your gaze lingered on his chest, his arms, trailing lower despite your best efforts to stop yourself. the heat in your face spread all the way to your core, and you bit your lip, trying not to openly gape at him.
rafe caught the way your eyes were literally ripping at him, the way your lips parted slightly, eyes wide with something that made his heart race and his ego burst out the roof. he chuckled, the deep sound vibrating through the room.
your eyes were fixed on him, your heart fluttering. as he moved closer, preparing to guide you into unfamiliar territory, he noticed the nervousness flicker in your eyes. your body tensed slightly beneath him, and your breaths quickened, though you didn't pull away.
"hey," he murmured, his voice soft, his hand cupping your cheek gently. "look at me." your gaze met his, and the warmth in his eyes immediately soothed some of your nerves. "you don't have to be nervous," he said, brushing his thumb along your jawline. you nodded, chest tightening at the sincerity in his voice. "i know," you whispered. "i trust you, rafe."
"good," he murmured, pressing his lips onto yours while lining himself up with your entrance, his tip brushing against your puffy clit before slowly pushing inside, making you audibly gasp. he was big, actually huge, stretching you out completely. when you winced slightly, he paused, pressing soothing kisses to your cheeks, making sure you were good to go before he started rocking his hips slowly.
your hands gripped his shoulders, your body gradually relaxing under his touch, the pleasure only growing from there. rafe was careful, controlled, making sure you felt comfortable and safe. and as you grew more confident, your hands began to roam over his body, nails digging into his back as quiet whimpers escaped your lips.
"rafe," you murmured breathlessly. he paused instantly, concern flickering in his gaze. "you okay?" he asked, brushing your hair back from your flushed face. your cheeks burned, and you hesitated for a moment before looking up at him with wide, pleading eyes. "i want...i need more. be rougher with me, please."
rafe froze, your words igniting something deep inside him. he studied your face, searching for any trace of doubt. but your expression was certain, eyes dark with desire. "y/n..." he began, his voice low, almost strained, "are you sure?"
"yes," you whispered, voice trembling but filled with need "want you, ray. all of you." your words snapped the last thread of his restraint. his lips crashed against yours, the kiss no longer soft and tentative but harsh, almost hungry. his hands gripped your hips firmly, pulling you closer as a low growl escaped his throat.
"you have no idea what you're doing to me," he murmured against your lips, his voice rough, edged with desire. "you’re so damn perfect, letting me be your first. do you know how crazy that drives me?"
your breath hitched at his words, body arching beneath him. you hadn't expected the heat that surged through you at the sound of his growly voice, making your head spin. "tell me," you whispered, voice shaking, “tell me everything."
his lips trailed down your neck, his teeth grazing your skin as he grunted, "you’re such a naughty little bunny. letting your best friend pop your cherry like this. shit—do you know how bad i’ve wanted you? how many times i’ve imagined this?" your gasp turned into a moan, your hands clutching at his shoulders, cunt clenching around his cock. "rafe..."
"you like that, huh?" he murmured, his voice dripping with need. "you like knowing how much i’ve wanted you? how long i’ve been holding back on pounding this sweet pussy?" he bit down on your shoulder, soothing the spot with his tongue as his grip on your hips tightened.
you could barely form a sentence, your mind going all fuzzy from his words and the way he made you feel. "yes," you breathed. "i love it.” rafe huffed, “say it again," he commanded, his tone firm as his movements grew more intense, abusing your wet cunt. "say you fucking love it."
"i love it," you cried out, voice breaking as you felt a tight knot forming in your lower stomach, his hips meeting yours with every thrust, "love it so much."
that broke something inside him. he couldn't hold back anymore, his movements turning fierce and desperate, thrusting into you harder, his hands and lips claiming every inch of you as his own. “that’s my girl.” he smiled through gritted teeth, feeling your cunt clench around him tighter, “gonna cum for me pretty bunny? make a mess all over my cock?”
you couldn’t hold it in anymore, arching your back as your head pressed down into the pillows, your orgasm rushing over you while crying out his name. rafe was absolutely going crazy, the sight of you cuming because of him was heaven sent, making him moan.
"you’re mine, y/n," he growled, his voice a low rumble in your ear as he helped you ride out your orgasm, “do ya’ hear me? you’re mine now. no one else gets to touch you like this."
"yes" you moaned, fingers tangling in his hair. "only you, ray." his movements grew sloppier the closer he got to releasing, his hips bucking into you, cock twitching inside your pulsing cunt as he filled up the condom with his seed, “fucking shit..”
the room was filled with the sound of heavy breathing as rafe hovered over you, his arms trembling slightly as he held himself up. his chest rose and fell against yours, his cock still buried inside you. your hands were resting on his shoulders, fingers tracing the faint lines of his muscles as you tried to catch your breath. your cheeks were flushed, hair messy and splayed out on the pillow beneath, but to rafe, you had never looked more beautiful.
he dipped his head, brushing soft, featherlight kisses along your jawline, then your cheek, and finally your lips. “you’re amazing," he murmured against your skin, his voice low and breathless. "so good. you were so, so good." he pressed another kiss to the curve of your neck before meeting your gaze, his blue eyes shining with admiration. "you have no idea how proud i am of you."
you let out a soft laugh, still trying to process everything. "i don't think anyone's ever said that to me... like this," you whispered, voice tinged with a slight shyness. "well, get used to it," rafe said with a small smirk, brushing a stray strand of hair from your face. "because i'm never letting you go now."
tags: @rafesbangs @rafesheaven @littlelamy @vampteeths @filthyrafe @figthoughts @pintrestgrl @kissyrafe @bambiangels @beausling @starzify
#dollys playroom 🐇#blurbs ₊˚⊹♡#bsf!rafe#rafe cameron x reader#bsf!rafe x reader#rafe cameron smut#rafe x reader#rafe cameron x fem!reader
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while i'm here writing songs for you
pairing: musician!choso x childhood friend!reader word count: 10.6k content: childhood friends to lovers, everyone knows they're in love except them, jealousy, mentions of virginity loss, dying on the grunge choso hill, lil angst, fluff, smut, 18+ inspired by: bless the telephone by labi siffre
“Hah! Your old man’s gonna kill me.”
Through shut eyes, a freshly eighteen-year-old Choso bit back an amused grin as best he could as to avoid disrupting his uncle’s work against his face.
“Nah, he caught Yuji at a casino this week, so I’m the golden boy for the foreseeable future while he’s grounded.” The boy muttered with a small smirk. He did feel for his little brother, often sneaking into his room with his console to entertain him for at least a short while in the midst of his prison sentence. Still, he had to admit that his timing was impeccable— giving the older sibling the perfect cushion to fall back to when Jin sees what his son had done to celebrate his birthday.
“Shit, yeah, I almost forgot.” Sukuna mumbled with a tickled shake of his head as he gripped at his nephew’s forehead in concentration. “Let the brat know I’ve still got his money whenever my boring ass brother lets him off house arrest.”
“Choso!”
The boy was eternally grateful that his uncle wasn’t as jumpy as he was, the man tightening his grip around his head in preparation for his jolt of surprise at the sudden shout.
“Ohhh, I’d be more scared of your girl than your dad, punk.”
You had burst through the doors of the tattoo parlor like a bat out of hell, your breath heaving slightly with the expended effort of hauling ass all the way over here from the restaurant you worked part time at. After receiving a cryptic picture from your best friend of him sat in his uncle’s tattoo chair with that deceivingly sheepish smile on his face, you could barely concentrate on taking orders correctly the remainder of your shift. Huffing out a sigh, you spotted those familiar, black combat boots hanging off the end of one of the leather seats.
Choso didn’t bother to correct Sukuna’s labeling of you as his girl, as it was proven a wasted effort after years of telling him that wasn’t the case. It also didn’t hurt that the title made his stomach flip excitedly each time he heard it.
“Oh my god.” You gaped once you finally reached the chair he was laid at. Half of the deep burgundy, nearly black mark that was being tattooed across his nose was already finished, and you could already picture the crash out Jin Itadori would have when he laid his eyes on his eldest son.
Cracking one eye open, the birthday boy took in the sight of you, cheeks still red and puffing from the run you took to get to him. Underneath that first layer of shock though, he could see the barely disguised wonder in your eyes as you assessed the situation at hand. Sukuna paused his ministrations to give his nephew a break, and so that you could see the progress.
“What the fuck! Your dad is gonna kill you.” You laughed incredulously, stepping closer to get a better look. Choso was just glad that his face was already tinged red from the irritation of the needle so you wouldn’t notice how he flushed insecurely under your gaze.
It was his main reasoning behind the oddly placed tattoo, actually. Since he was little he could remember his face growing noticeably hot over the tiniest of compliments, looks, or touches. Maybe it was far-fetched, but he hoped the imposing mark across his nose and cheeks would draw the attention away from that little quirk of his. It also didn’t hurt that the stencil looked cool as fuck.
“Not if you’re with me, he won’t.” Choso suggested with a sly, hopeful smile on his face, and you quickly shook your head at him. His face fell into that pout he had mastered to use specifically on you. “C’mon, he’ll take it easy on me if you’re there, please!”
“It was bad enough having to be your human shield when you got your nose pierced, Cho— no way.”
“I’ll let you check my back for blackheads.”
It fell silent for a moment as you contemplated his offer.
“You two are fuckin’ freaks.” Sukuna scoffed in disgust beside you before dragging his nephew’s chin back to face forward to continue working. You winced watching the needle begin to pierce at his already irritated skin, and you found yourself instinctively slipping your hand into his to squeeze it.
“Does it hurt?” You grimaced, leaning a bit closer to watch.
Choso almost said no, because, truthfully, he had gotten used to the pain about half an hour ago, but he took note of the way you clutched at his hand to comfort him. His lips twitched nervously at the feeling as he closed his eyes once again.
“Uh— yeah, kind of.” He mumbled, taking the opportunity to lace his fingers through yours under the guise of having something to squeeze onto when he was in pain. His uncle watched the interaction with a deadpan expression, knowing full well that the kid hadn’t so much as flinched once since he’d sat down. Shaking his head with a quiet tut, he barely tried to conceal his amused smirk.
“What about you, birthday girl, huh? You getting some celebratory ink too?” Sukuna questioned, wiping at the side of Choso’s nose that he’d just filled in. You cringed as you watched the tiniest amount of blood trickle at the bridge of his nose.
“Don’t know, I think Cho took all the balls in this friendship.” You admitted with a defeated smile.
“Don’t be such a wimp.” Your best friend teased with a careful smile as he stretched his lower half against the stiff chair. The black sweater he was wearing rode up a bit, practically commanding the attention of your wandering eyes. There was a barely noticeable trail of dark hair leading down into the band of his joggers, and your lips parted as you tried to recall when the fuck that had happened.
The last couple of months in your friendship with Choso had been… getting a little difficult. You two had been practically joined at the hip since you were six years old and yelled at a group of first graders for not singing happy birthday to him as well after having overheard his dad wishing him a happy birthday that morning during drop off. For a while, the two of you would tell people at school that you were twins even though it was so clearly not the case, but six-year-old you and Cho were sure that you had everyone convinced.
He had always been a bit of an introvert, so you had been the greatest birthday gift he could have ever hoped for. So, the awkward boy stuck to your side from that day on. Wherever one was, the other was never too far behind, and this would now be the twelfth birthday you two would be spending together.
Choso had certainly been… changing though from that lanky little boy who would sniffle and cry each time you two parted for the day (as if you didn’t attend the same school). He had grown taller, his voice had dropped a few octaves, and these days you were finding yourself worrying about the timeline of your best friend’s happy trail. For a while you blamed it on the raging hormones that came along with puberty, but you were eighteen now and weren’t sure how much longer that excuse would hold up in your denial-filled brain.
This was just one more way he was changing, you convinced yourself as you anxiously waited for him to unlock the front door of his house, his nose and cheeks still glistening with the antibiotic ointment Sukuna had slathered onto his fresh tattoo. He would have never had the courage to do something so bold even just a couple years ago. You had to admit though, the odd choice of tattoo did suit him, emphasizing those tired, chocolate eyes of his so nicely.
It was silent in the Itadori house as you two crept in, scanning the area apprehensively with each step you took. You clutched at the back of his shirt, tugging him to lean down as you whispered into his black-studded ear.
“I don’t think anyone’s—”
“Happy birthday you—” Poor, sweet Jin Itadori’s shout of celebration got stuck right in the back of his throat as his eyes fell upon his eldest son, a lit up birthday cake still clutched in his hands. He blinked a few times as though there was possibly just something in his eyes, but the wide-eyed expression of anxiety on the boy’s face gave him away. “What in god’s name did you do to your face? Was this your uncle? Did he tell you this was a good idea because I—”
“It was my idea.” Choso corrected, not-so-subtly attempting to nudge you forward as if you would soften the blow of his father’s wrath, who’s honey eyes fell frantically upon you.
“Did you know about this? Please tell me you two are punking me or something.”
“She didn’t know.” He quickly defended despite the fact that it would have been a lot easier to share the blame. Rubbing at the back of his neck, he attempted a light-hearted smile. “C’mon, don’t I look—”
“You look like you’re about to be stuck working in that tattoo shop with your uncle the rest of your life because no one is going to hire you with that thing!” The man had begun pacing the length of the kitchen with the cake still in tow, shaking his head in disbelief before stopping to gape at his son in horror once again. “You couldn’t have at least waited until after prom? Graduation? All your photos— ruined! Oh god, I think I’m going to pass out—”
“Calm down, it’s not that big a deal— not like I did anything illegal, y’know like sneaking into a casino while underaged.” Choso attempted to distract him with a sheepish smile, stepping forward to take the cake out of his hands lest he really pass out. With his now free hands, Jin was tearing at the roots of his hair as he continued his frantic pacing, mumbling about not reminding him of Yuji’s recent run in with the law. “Besides, I’m not going to prom anyway.”
Now it was your turn to gape at the freshly-tattooed birthday boy.
“You’re not?” You questioned, desperately trying not to sound as dejected as you felt. Though you two had never talked about it, you had just assumed that you’d be going to prom together given all the other important milestone events that you had completed hand in hand. Hell, you had even been putting off an offer from a fellow classmate of yours with the impression that Choso would be asking you to be his date— platonically, of course.
“You’re not?” Jin echoed in horror, finally looking up from where his face had been shoved into his hands. The man didn’t miss the disheartened expression that flashed across your face despite your best efforts to conceal it. “Why not? You’re only a high-schooler once, Choso, don’t be silly.”
Perhaps his nervous convincing was a bit overkill, but damn it how he was tired of watching his clearly love-sick son grow older and older without growing any wits about him on what was going on right under his nose. After hosting years worth of playdates for you two as mere children, to encouraging his son to be a little gentler with you as you began going through those awkward years that plagued every pre-teen girl, all the way to having to watch with barely concealed frustration at the way you two fell into one another’s ebb and flow so gracefully without any semblance of self-awareness— Jin was sure that he was more excited than the actual seniors for prom to come around, eager to force you two into the most obvious of couple’s poses for photos before sending you off for the night.
“Why would I go to prom? You know I hate that kind of stuff.” He explained obviously before turning to see the settling shock lingering on your face. It made him blink a few times, brows furrowing in confusion. “I-I mean, are you going?”
“Um…” You stammered over your words, trying to suppress the flush of embarrassment that you felt creeping up your neck for having assumed that Choso would ask you to prom. He felt his heart in his throat, breath hitching in slight anticipation, because he was sure he wouldn’t have too terrible of a time if it was you he was going with, but the last thing he wanted to do was make things weird by asking you to be his date. “Y-Yeah, I was planning to go. Geto had asked me a few days ago, so—”
“You’re going with Geto?” It felt like his heart had fallen straight through his ass, and it took every inch of restraint in him to not begin banging his head against the dry-wall in a bitter rage, because why did he not think to ask you first? “I didn’t know you two talked like that.”
Jin wasn’t sure how much more of this he could stand to watch before he wrung his son’s neck out. He cleared his throat in an attempt to subtly get Choso’s attention and hopefully send some sort of telepathic communication to him, but he was far too focused on this Geto character that you had mentioned to get his head out of his own ass.
“We don’t really, but… he asked me, and I wanted to go.”
My god, does she have to spell it out for him? Did I fail somewhere along the way as a father that my son turned out such an oblivious hard head? Just ask her— ask her!
“Oh. Well… that’s good, I guess.”
Jin hoped to god that as Choso blew out half the candles on you two’s shared birthday cake that he was wishing for some common sense.
You two did the best you could to shake off the sudden awkwardness following the conversation about prom. At the very least, you two still had to give each other your gifts, so you figured that would cushion the tension. You followed him up the familiar path to his room where you had had Yuji drop off his gift for you so it’d be here when you two got back, biting down an excited smile.
“No way.” Choso gaped just seconds after opening the door. Stepping in to get a closer look, he quickly turned on his heels to stare incredulously at you. “No way— this is too much. I-I can’t take this.”
There leaned upon the side of his bed was a sleek black electric guitar— one he’d been keening over since the acoustic guitar his dad had gotten him damn near nine years ago now had mysteriously snapped at the neck. Okay, maybe it wasn’t so mysterious because you did tell Choso that climbing up onto his shoulders to get the spider that had been terrorizing his ceiling wasn’t a good idea, because sure enough as soon as the wretched thing moved an inch, you jolted back, sending both of you tumbling to the ground with only his poor guitar to break the fall.
“After all the fake flirting I had to do to rack up enough tip money for it? You sure as hell can take it.”
“Please, I can’t—”
“You can, and you will.”
His face was burning with the guilt of how much you had spent on him, but the glimmering shine of the fresh guitar in his peripheral was helping to soften the blow a bit. The boy’s fingers were practically twitching with the anticipation of getting his hands on the thing, but he stopped himself. With a shy smile shot your way, he crouched down to pull out a box that had since been hiding under his bed. You smiled eagerly before sinking down to sit criss-crossed straight across from him, your present filling the small gap left between you.
He laughed affectionately as he watched you struggle to pry the box open, deciding to put you out of your misery after a minute or so and tearing the cardboard apart for you. The first thing that caught your eye was a vinyl record— your favorite album that you had introduced Choso to a few years back. It held a tender spot in both of your hearts for that very reason, and its lead single had consequently been the first song he learned to play on his guitar all those years ago.
Even all these years later he could still feel the sting in his fingers that had yet to callous protectively against the instrument’s strings as he stayed up until the sun rose that next morning trying to perfect each chord so that he could play it for you when you came over. It was choppy at best, what with all the scrapes on his irritated fingers and the lack of sleep, but the dewey eyed look on your face made him feel like he was Jimi fucking Hendrix, only fueling his motivation to get better— to impress you. So, despite how his fingers began to bleed, he played it for you over and over again until you were satisfied.
The sight of the nostalgic album nearly made you tear up pathetially, but you pulled yourself together to beam up at him with all the light of a thousand suns. He flushed under your gaze, quickly looking down to push the box toward you again with a jut of his chin.
“There’s still something in there.”
Tearing your eyes from him, you pushed back the flaps of the box to get a better look, finding a far too expensive looking record player sitting at the bottom of the large box that he’d definitely been begging neighbors to let him clean their car or mow their lawn in order to afford. Gasping softly, an incredulous laugh bubbled up your chest as you shifted onto your knees.
“Cho, this is so cool!” You guffawed, fingers struggling to wrangle the turntable out of the damned box to no avail. Unable to fight back his smile, he moved to brush your hands away and grab it for you, setting it down atop his black comforter. Running your fingers down the glossy box, you looked up at him with raised brows. “You’re gonna come back to my house to help me set it up, right?”
“You putting me to work on my birthday?” He quipped with a smirk as he fell back against the bed, hoisting up his new guitar to rest on his stomach.
“I’ll give you the day.” You caved in mock resignation as you laid beside him, head shifted to observe the way he fiddled with the tuners. “New face tattoo, new guitar— your rockstar look is really coming together.”
“Yeah?”
“For sure— just missing some guyliner.”
His nimble fingers paused against the strings, lips pursing as he peered over at you. It was dead silent as a slow smile spread across your face— because you could practically hear the wheels turning in his head. It was only a mere five minutes later that you found yourself digging your fingers into his jaw to stop him from flinching away each time the eyeliner pencil drew a little too close to his iris.
“Sit still, dude.” You grumbled, stepping closer between his spread legs as he sat impatiently in his desk chair.
Huffing out a sigh, he tried not to squirm at your burning proximity. Your tongue was creeping out the corner of your mouth in concentration, and the hand that had since been on his jaw moved to brush the hair away from his forehead. He could feel the warm puffs of your breath fanning against his face, driving his legs to squirm against the floor, which seemed to be the final straw for your patience.
Choso thought his heart would leap out of his chest when you planted yourself firmly on his lap, your legs hanging over the side of his chair. His arms quickly fell to his sides as though weighed down by bricks, dangling limply as his fingers flexed apprehensively. Gulping anxiously, he tried not to focus on the way the fat of your thighs squished against him.
“Close your eyes, Cho.” You murmured quietly as you began working on his lids. He did so swiftly, eager to not have to worry about where to place his gaze.
“So, um…” The boy cleared his throat, trying desperately to get his mind anywhere else before he created a problem that would be embarrassing for the both of you. “You’re really going to prom with Geto?”
“Mhm.” You hummed simply, chewing on your bottom lip as you smudged the freshly placed liner with the edge of your thumb. Perhaps you should have said more, but you weren’t sure that you trusted your voice if you were to speak right now.
“Do you… I mean are you—”
“Look up for me.”
Cursing himself mentally to just get it the fuck together, he tried again as he did as he was told, warm eyes glancing up at the ceiling.
“I just didn’t know you liked him is all.” He finally got out as his pulse pounded against the fingers you had pressed against his jaw and neck once again. “You’ve always told me about stuff like that.”
With a tickled smile, you leaned back in his lap to narrow your eyes knowingly at him. Upon noting your silence paired with the way you had stopped your work against his eyes, he finally looked back down, and you had to bite back the delighted gasp from seeing the way the smudged, dark liner paired so beautifully with the rest of him, making his already mysteriously dark eyes that much more sultry.
“You’re jealous, Choso!”
“What? N-No, I was just—”
“You are so jealous that I didn’t tell you about Geto.”
“I’m not jealous!”
“You are!”
“Am not!”
He was so jealous, Choso determined as he stared up at his ceiling the dreaded night of prom. His fingers idly strummed at the new guitar that laid across his stomach, trying to get his mind off of the fact that you hadn’t even bothered to send him a picture of your dress. It had always been him that was the first to see your new haircuts, fresh manicures, and imaginative outfits, and it was eating him alive that for the first time in twelve years, another guy was going to get to witness that little spin of display you did each time you wore something you felt particularly pretty in.
It didn’t help that he’d already gotten an earful from his dad when he got home from school that day about the fact that he still hadn’t righted his wrong and asked you instead. Jin must have gone on for at least an hour about what a shame it was that of all the experiences you two had shared, one as important to you as this one would be hand in hand with someone else. For the first time since the start of your long-winded friendship, he was sharing you with someone, and Choso was quickly realizing that he was selfish— and unashamedly so.
The event had already been going on for about two hours now, and he was coming to terms with the fact that he wouldn’t hear from you tonight. The familiar notes of that favorite song of yours that he had learned all those years ago filled his ears as he began absentmindedly plucking at the strings under his fingertips. Ever so slowly, the melody began shifting into one he’d never heard before, taking its own shape as it filled his melancholy room with feelings of you, and how much he’d taken it for granted all those times he had you laying beside him as he toyed with the notes, telling him what sounded nice and what he needed to work on.
The notes suddenly screeched awkwardly as his phone began buzzing in his back pocket, yanking him from his pensive sulking with its imposing tune. Blinking a few times, he frantically tossed his hips up to wrangle his phone out from behind him, the head of his guitar smacking him in the face with the sudden movements.
He shot up out of bed pathetically upon seeing your name lighting up his screen along with a picture he’d taken of the two of you in the mirror a few months ago when you tried to give him red highlights. There was dye nearly everywhere except where it was supposed to be, yet you still beamed up at the mirror despite the red streaks covering your face and arms, gloved hands still tangled into his hair.
Clearing his throat, he quickly swiped to answer the call before it went to voicemail.
“Did someone spike the punch or—”
“Choso?” Your voice sounded hushed, but it still wavered ever-so-slightly against the sound of music blaring in the distance. The smile quickly fell from his face. “Do you think you could… come get me?”
“Y-Yeah, yeah, I’m coming. What’s going on?” He was barrelling through his hectic room to find any pair of shoes to shove on, nearly tripping over himself as he hopped toward the front door on one foot.
“Um… nothing, I just… really wanna go home.”
There wasn’t even the tiniest part of him that was convinced, but that would just have to be a conversation for later because there was a timid vulnerability and tremor in your sweet voice that he’d never heard before. Snatching his dad’s keys from the hook by the door, he was requesting your location before racing down the street. There was a slight possibility that he had run more than a few red lights on his way to the hotel that was hosting your school’s prom in the banquet hall. The car had barely come to a stop when he was flinging the door open to rush toward the bench you were sitting at out front.
“What are you doing out here by yourself? Where’s Geto?”
But your eyes were fluttering around you cautiously, scoping the surrounding area with a shake of your head as your best friend pulled you up by your arm.
“Please, can we just go? I don’t—”
“Right— yeah, okay, come on.”
It was silent on the ride home save for your hushed request that he take you back to his house for the night instead. Cautionary side long glances were continuously tossed your way throughout the drive, and you could practically feel the concerned curiosity eating alive at him as your body faced the passenger side door. You were eternally grateful for the fact that the other two residents of the Itadori household had already turned in for the night when you two arrived.
Choso flipped the lights on in his room, carefully inching the door of his room closed so as not to wake anyone up. When he turned, he was finally able to get his first good look at you, and he was absolutely bursting at the seams to know what Geto must have done to fuck up a night with you as his date looking as ethereal as you did standing in the middle of his room.
You were sighing dejectedly as you tugged open his drawers to fish out something to change into, but Choso was still stuck by the door, eyes taking in each detail of your glittering makeup and intricately lined lips.
“You…” His words drifted as you turned your back toward him so he’d undo your zipper. “You look beautiful.”
You paused, head slowly turning to look over your shoulder at him with misty eyes.
“Thanks, Cho.”
Quickly working your zipper down, he turned to face the door as you stepped out of your dress to shrug on a pair of his sweatpants and a crewneck. His leg swayed anxiously while he listened to the gentle rustling of clothes behind him.
“Did… did something happen?”
Upon hearing the subtle creak of his bed as you sank down onto it, he carefully turned around. The bed dipped by your head where he sat himself, and you felt him absentmindedly begin pulling the myriad of pins from your hair. Flushing red, you covered your face with your hands as you recalled how your night had progressed, not caring how you were smudging your makeup against your hands.
“He… he just wanted to have sex with me.”
Choso felt his heart crack at your shaky explanation, the guilt he had been experiencing for not having asked you to prom himself returning tenfold. The bobby pin in his grasp bent between his fingers as he thought about how Geto had ruined what was meant to be a special night for you.
“That guy’s a loser, he’ll probably die a virgin anyway.” He attempted to lighten the mood with a hesitant, breathy laugh, but it died in his throat when you slowly sat up to look at him, your now loose hair falling messily in your face and tears brimming your eyes. His stomach dropped at the mortified expression scrunching up your typically cheerful face, and he gulped down the bile rising in his throat. “Oh.”
A sob racked your body as you moved to curl into a tight ball, your head resting against his tense thighs. His hands hovered over you uncertainly before slowly coming down to brush at the hair invading your face.
“So, you…” He couldn’t even bring himself to say it, the words tasting bitter on his tongue.
“I feel like an idiot.” You cried, fisting at his pajama pants. “I stopped him right after he— he put it… in, but—”
“It’s okay.” Choso cut off your embarrassed rambles, pulling you up to wrap you in a tight embrace. He wasn’t sure if he could handle listening to the details. “Did he stop when you asked him to?”
A heavy sigh of relief left him when you nodded against his shoulder. It was silent for a few minutes, your soft cries soaking into the fabric of his tattered, band t-shirt.
“I’m sorry.” He whispered dejectedly, trying desperately to get the image out of his head of you underneath of Geto with your makeup done up so prettily for someone who didn’t deserve it. He thought about how none of it would have happened had he just grown a pair. “I’m sorry I didn’t ask you to prom. I should’ve taken you, none of this would have—”
“It’s not your fault.” You interrupted, finally lifting your head from where it had burrowed into his neck to look up at him, your lip still trembling as your once pristine makeup smeared down your red cheeks.
As you stared into his dewey, warm eyes, you allowed your thoughts to wander to how your night might have ended had Choso been your date, how you had stopped Geto after the gruelling realization hit you that no hands felt as right against your skin without the gruffness of guitar-string callouses. Your stomach churned nervously, and you laid back down against his lap, unable to face him as the words came tumbling from your lips.
“I wish it would have been you, Cho.”
Choso’s heart sputtered to an abrupt halt— at least that’s what it felt like as your words sunk in. Slowly, he laid back against his pillow, careful not to jostle you in your spot against his thighs. Staring up at the ceiling, his mouth opened and closed a few times.
“Y-You mean as a prom date, right?” The question came out apprehensively, because, deep down, you both already knew the answer. You closed your eyes nonetheless, a final tear slipping down your cheek.
“Yeah, as a prom date.” Your lie came out barely a whisper as he chewed on his bottom lip.
“I wish it would’ve been me too. Y’know, your… prom date.”
It was the first time both of you knew that something had shifted in your relationship, though neither of you were brave enough to mention it the next morning when you woke.
That fateful night was two years ago now, and you had had ample time to come to the realization that perhaps you should have been more upfront with him, because Choso was now hundreds of miles away at an arts school with only a telephone keeping you two together.
It had been a difficult conversation with shifting eyes and unnecessarily guilty frowns, but when your best friend had broken the news to you that he’d been accepted into a different university than the one you’d be attending, you couldn’t have been happier that he was pursuing his passion for music. When he dropped the bomb that it was nearly six hours away— that was a tougher pill to swallow.
You two had been doing the best you could though— calling each other every other night and texting in between to make sure to keep up to date on everything university life had to offer you. Still, things would get busy sometimes, what with Choso’s occasional shows that he’d been playing with a local band in his college town, and your downright diabolical class and exam schedule. Things certainly weren’t the same anymore, but you desperately tried to cling onto him.
Additionally, in your absence Choso was reminded of just how much of a clutch you had been for him. He had never been the best at talking to others, relating to the types of casual niceties that seemed to connect people, but he had never had to until now because you had always been just enough for him. Sure, he had warmed up enough to his bandmates, but it was never the same— not when he sat alone in his room at night strumming melodies he only wished he would have played for you earlier when he still had the chance to do something about these things he was feeling.
On your end of the world, it certainly didn’t help that his band had grown a modest following, and it seemed that for the first time, the rest of the world was also beginning to notice Choso.
Choso, the one boys and girls alike used to veer away from in the halls at school because of his terrifyingly blunt, resting bitch face.
Choso, the one who spent the majority of highschool with limbs that seemed too long for his body until he grew into his own.
Choso, the one who, unless you were beside him, often took jokes too literally and ended up embarrassing himself each time he opened his mouth.
Choso, the one who you had stuck beside throughout each awkward phase and experimental hairstyle until he landed on the shag cut that suited him so nicely.
Choso, the one who had been receiving the nastiest of thirst comments under each of his band’s social media posts as the rest of the world caught onto what you had known all along.
And, god, how it stung to scroll through each one, but it was like you couldn’t look away, wondering with each username if he was enjoying all the new attention he was getting. You wondered how far he had leaned into this rockstar persona he had been dreaming of his whole life, if he snuck girls backstage and pocketed their bras as evidence of his conquests.
I mean, the guy had gone damn near his entire life without so much as a second glance from any girl he’d come in contact with— except for you, of course, and you underestimated just how deep his loyalty ran and how much he remembered who it was that had been with him through it all.
So, to hell with every creatively intricate thirst comment under photos that even had you contemplating starting a burner account to appreciate with the masses, none of them mattered despite all the nights you’d spent chewing at your fingernails with thoughts of what he might be up to. Each fan account could burn in hell though— because it was you he called as soon as he’d received the news that his band would be touring, opening for an indie band that you two had actually been fans of for quite some time.
“I wanna fly you out.” Choso insisted breathlessly, still winded from the sheer velocity at which he raced for his phone upon hearing the news. It made your heart stutter, because it had been now going on three years since you last saw him, your schedules never having seemed to line up just right. There were a few times when you had contemplated flying out to surprise him at one of his local, bar shows, but with your building mountain of school work, you’d had little to no time to get a job that could afford you the extra change at the end of each month to buy a plane ticket. At your silence, he huffed, and you could practically hear that damned pout from over the phone. “C’mon, our birthday is coming up. We used to spend all our birthdays together.”
Smiling wistfully at the memories of how easy you two once had it, you shook your head.
“Well that was before you became some heart-throb rock star, Cho.” You teased, fiddling with the hem of your shirt as you wondered if he still blushed so easily at little comments like that, and, if so, what shade his cheeks were at the moment.
“How am I supposed to be a rock star with no groupies? That’s just lame.”
“Oh, trust me, I’m sure you have a long list of contenders waiting in line. Have you been checking your instagram comments lately?”
This made him pause, the tiniest of knowing smiles creeping onto his face.
“No, but it sounds like you have.”
For once, it was you flushing that burning shade of red that once graced his cheeks so frequently, and you wondered when he’d begun reciprocating your teasing banter instead of just stammering through his responses while trying not to look you in the eyes. Shaking his head with a nearly silent chuckle, he decided to put you out of your misery, clutching his phone tighter against his ears.
“Let me fly you out, please? I know you’ve gotta break coming up. I wanna see you.”
So just three months later, though truthfully it felt like a year as you and Choso counted down the days until you would see each other again, you were on a flight courtesy of his now modest earnings from his band. And sure, it was no fancy seat with the luxury accommodations he just knew you deserved, but he felt so proud to know that he was able to do something for you. He had been waiting at the airport nearly two hours before your flight was actually supposed to land, flowers clutched in his clammy hands as he checked the time repeatedly.
Much to his frustration, your flight kept getting delayed, and, after the third push back, he had to begrudgingly resign himself to the fact that he wouldn’t get to be there when you landed, having to get back for sound check for the show tonight. After sending a long winded explanation text, he insisted that you text him as soon as you land as well as as soon as you got to the hotel and as soon as you made it to the venue, and— well, you got the point.
With all the sudden delays, you only had time to drop your luggage off at the front desk of the hotel, who assured you they’d get it to your room for you before you had to haul ass to the venue before you missed any second of Choso’s band opening. He had given your name to security, who had your pass waiting for you when you arrived and quickly led you toward a less crowded section reserved for the talents’ guests.
You were slightly winded from the nonstop moving you had been doing since you woke up this morning, but even with how spent you felt, you weren’t sure anything could have woken you up faster than the sight of your best friend on that stage after three years of not seeing him. Sure, the two of you had been keeping up with pictures and the occasional video call, but none of it did him justice— not with the way the boy you once knew had grown into such a… man.
The once lanky limbs that hung awkwardly at his sides had certainly filled out, emphasized nicely by the gaping muscle shirt he currently had on. His biceps flexed with each rip of his guitar as his grown out hair fell into his chiseled face. To your surprise, he had a mic situated in front of him and was occasionally offering back-up vocals that you were straining with everything in you to pinpoint amongst the rest of the music.
His eyes swept across the designated guest area, and you and your poor, weak heart nearly gave out upon realizing that he had begun lining them just as you did for him all those years ago, smudged out across his lids and adding a spine-tingling depth as they spotted you in the crowd. That earth-shattering smile lit up his face as he took in the sight of you looking up at him, because none of this success and fulfillment of lifelong dreams felt nearly as sweet without you being in the audience for him to impress.
Choso was breath-taking on that stage, commanding it with a confidence you had never seen on him before. It was a blur as the set went on, your shouting out the lyrics to the songs of theirs that you’d kept up with over the year, your already spent body expending the fumes of energy it had left to thrash around to the eardrum-crushing beat.
You found yourself anxiously checking your phone when his band finished their set and disappeared backstage, not knowing if you were going to have to wait until the end of the show to see him. Thinking back to the phone conversation you two had had months prior, and how you really were starting to feel like his groupie. The thought made you smile in amusement, shoving your phone back into your pocket as the main band came out on stage.
Your questions were answered just one song in when a pair of nearly steaming, sweat clung arms wrapped around your shoulders and chest from behind, squeezing you into an equally sweaty chest.
“Ew, Cho, get off! You’re soaked!” You tried to sound disgusted, but your delighted laugh deceived you, because you were sure that he could have been covered head to toe in blood right now and you’d still allow him to latch onto you as he was doing so ardently.
“What happened to being my groupie?” He shouted over the blasting music, surprising you when his lips met your cheek in a sloppy kiss. Even he wasn’t sure where he’d worked up the gall to kiss you, but maybe it was the fact that he’d spent the last three years regretting his inaction, and he’d be damned if he was going to let you board that flight back home without at least trying.
Hoping he didn’t see the way your cheeks flushed at the little stunt, you took note of the fact that he had yet to release you.
“Your groupie is gonna need a few drinks if she has to deal with your stench for the next hour.”
In typical Choso fashion, he quickly obliged your request, planting yet another kiss against your temple before disappearing in the blur of security and venue workers to find you something to drink. You felt like your head was spinning with his sudden forward shift in behavior, but you chalked it up to the fact that you two hadn’t seen each other in so long.
So, you didn’t question it when he came back with two vodka Red Bulls and continued to cling onto you the remainder of the show. He hoisted you up on his back when the crowd around you began to grow so you could get a better view of the band and didn’t care that you were screaming along to the songs right into his ear because you were finally here with him, and he could buy you drinks and give you front row seats to one of your favorite bands, and for once he thought that maybe he was brave enough to admit that he wanted something more with you after all these years of convincing himself that there was nothing he could offer you that’d be worth your while.
He was riding on the high of your giddy smile the entire taxi ride back to the hotel, unable to wipe that lovesick grin off of his face even when you asked him if there was something on your face that was warranting all the staring.
“I’m just gonna shower really quick, and then I’ll come to your room so we can order some food, ‘kay?” You explained while fishing out the room key that you’d received from the front desk earlier that day.
Choso’s brows furrowed as he pushed the respective button on the elevator and adjusted his guitar case over his shoulder.
“What do you mean? We’re going to the same room.”
Looking up from the inside of your bag, you stared at him with a slightly dumbfounded expression.
“You only booked one room?” You questioned with a fluttering gaze.
“We’ve always shared a room.” He explained obviously, making his way down the hall once the elevator doors opened. You could hardly argue with him on that logic, because you two had been sharing a room, hell— sharing a bed since you were kids. As you followed close behind him, butterflies churning in your stomach, you came to the conclusion that Choso had neglected to account for the fact that you two weren’t kids anymore.
Still, he had flown you all this way, and you had missed the endless nights you two would spend together watching horror movies until Jin would stumble into the room, exasperated as he asked you two to please turn down the volume or, better yet, watch anything else that didn’t have him jolting awake from the incessant sounds of blood-curdling screams emanating from his son’s room at ungodly hours of the night. Bonus points if you two had snuck Yuji in to watch them with you and had to shove him under the bed until their dad left the room lest he find out his youngest was watching movies far too mature for his age.
Yuji and Jin weren’t there to interrupt though, and you were currently hyping yourself up in the bathroom mirror to go out and spend the night with the man you’d known for fifteen years now. Looking down at yourself, you cursed at your choice of sleep wear that you’d clearly chosen before you knew Choso would be sleeping beside you. His old Metallica t-shirt had tiny holes in the shoulders and was discolored from so many years of wash cycles, but it was just so perfectly worn in, and it was a little reminder of him each time you went to sleep.
The tattered hem fell just above your mid-thigh, and you were once again punching yourself in the leg because why would you not pack any pajama shorts? Pants? A longer shirt? Literally anything other than your fucking jeans that you’d rather bear the humiliation for than wear to bed? Huffing out a final sigh, you hung up your towel before exiting the steam-filled bathroom outwardly displaying far more confidence than was actually present in your muddled mind at the moment.
“Shower’s open, Cho.” You informed with your eyes cast downward, shoving your dirty clothes into the respective section of your suitcase.
He looked up from the room service menu he’d been studying for the past few minutes, his heart nearly leaping out of his chest at the sight of your bare thighs that still glistened from whatever lotion you had slathered on after your shower, and oh god was that his shirt? His brain was short-circuiting on the spot, and he was so grateful that he was jumping into the shower now, knowing that knob was about to be turned to the coldest setting he could manage.
You sighed in quiet relief when the bathroom door shut behind him, thanking your lucky stars that he hadn’t mentioned anything about your choice of sleepwear— or lack thereof, hoping it meant that he didn’t notice.
Finally allowing some of the tension to fall from your shoulders, you looked around the slightly bougie hotel room, smiling at the sight of his guitar leaning against the wall. Taking the opportunity to be a little nosy for nostalgia’s sake, you unzipped the case and carefully pulled the beloved instrument out. It was hardly recognizable now, what with all the decals and stickers he’d adorned it with over the years, but it was that same electric guitar you had scraped up all your tip money to buy for him.
Humming fondly, you sat crisscrossed in the middle of the plush bed to fiddle with the strings, recalling all the nights Choso had spent desperately trying to teach you how to play, but you never could make good on his diligent efforts. You could only vaguely recall the chords to that first song he’d ever learned to play, the one you’d watched him strum what must have been hundreds of times for you. Pursing your lip, you tried to angle your fingers just right along the neck as you dug into the far corners of your memory.
“Your hand is too far up the neck.”
In your fierce concentration, you hadn’t even heard Choso exiting the bathroom. Not looking up at him lest you break your focus, you shifted your hand as he’d instructed.
“Here?”
He tutted softly, though you could practically hear the fond amusement oozing from him. After a moment, you felt the bed dip behind you, and your breath hitched as you felt his chest press against your back, and you suddenly didn’t feel as embarrassed at your lack of clothing since he hadn’t bothered to put a shirt on following his shower. His hands soon came up to close around yours, guiding them to the proper placement.
“Try now.” He instructed softly, tucking his chin over your shoulder to watch your movements.
Trying to control the way your fingers trembled with the feeling of the muscles he never used to have pressed right up against you, you tried again. When he let out a quiet hum of disapproval, you didn’t have the chance to ask what you had done wrong before he was scooching you back to sit in his lap for better access to the instrument.
“You’ve gotta spread out your fingers a little more.” Choso’s tips were falling on deaf ears, because his scent was enveloping you like a warm blanket, he was so warm pressed right up against you, and his cheek was brushing against yours as he adjusted your fingers.
As he had been telling himself since he saw you in the audience earlier for the first time in three years, he wasn’t that awkward boy anymore who was too scared to be honest with himself, and he knew better than to believe that the flush in your cheeks right now was from your shower. Smiling softly, he eased up his hands as you began to get the hang of it, only occasionally reaching up to correct your placements. You gradually allowed yourself to relax against him, your shoulders drifting back to fall along his broad chest.
“Do you ever think about that night of prom?” Out of all the ways he could have eased into this conversation, he wasn’t sure why that was what had come out of his mouth, but he was relieved when you scoffed out a light laugh.
“You mean the night I lost my virginity to Suguru Geto?” You shook your head at the once damn near traumatic memory, a bitter smile gracing your lips. “I try not to.”
It was silent for a moment, and just as he thought you had all but forgotten what you had said to him that night, you spoke up hesitantly.
“Do you? Y’know— think about it?”
“All the time.”
Your fingers paused against the strings, but a hushed whisper in your ear to keep playing had you jolting back into action, but your subtle squirming against his lap gave you away.
“Why the hell would you be thinking about that?” You mumbled, keeping your voice low as you desperately tried to maintain your composure.
“Because I can’t stop thinking about what would’ve happened if it was me instead.”
His hand came up to tighten your grip around the neck of the guitar that had loosened with the implications of his words, and you heard those familiar words falling from your lips just as they had from his three years ago.
“You mean as my prom date, right, Cho?”
His head shifted ever so slightly, and you shivered as his nose grazed against your temple. The hand that had been guiding your fingers over the strings drifted down to ghost over your bare thigh.
“Yeah, as your prom date.” He lied, just as you had that night. The pads of his fingers dug into the fat of your thigh momentarily, giving you the opportunity to push him away should he have been reading all the signs wrong. You didn’t though, you only held back the softest of whimpers when the metaphorical green light prompted him to run his hand further up, brushing back your already maddeningly ridden up shirt. “I think about how much of an idiot he was, what I would’ve done different.”
The way your comparably smaller frame was expanding and deflating against him in tandem with your labored breaths was making it hard for him to think, and he was sure his body was acting purely on autopilot.
“Like what?” You dared to whisper, not even quite sure that you were ready to hear his answer, but oh was he willing to give it to you.
“I would’ve told you how pretty you looked that night— because you did. You looked like an angel.” Choso rasped out against your ear, and his fingers were curling around the warmth of your inner thigh, just barely grazing against your rapidly heating core. Your fingers stuttered once again against the strings, and his other hand quickly came up to grip at the column of your neck, pressing you back against him. “Keep playing for me, angel.”
And you tried, hands trembling as they fumbled to find the right chords again.
“Did he touch you like this before he ruined your night?”
“No!” You gasped out desperately, arching against him as he pushed your panties to the side to collect the pooling slick at your entrance, using it to aid in the tentative circles he began working against your clit. “H-He didn’t touch me at all— ah!”
With a vexed tut of disapproval, Choso’s fingers dipped down to plunge into your sopping heat. His movements were choppy, and it was clear that he wasn’t sure what exactly you would like, but his focused gaze on your side profile as he studied each of your reactions told you that he was going to figure it the fuck out.
“I would have taken the time for you— I would’ve made sure you were ready.” His regrets were spilling past his frantic lips in a manner teetering on a whine as your head fell back against his shoulder. “Keep playing.”
“I can’t— I can’t, Cho.” You cried deliriously as his fingers began curling up in response to your frantic reaction. You were soaking through the underwear that had been pushed haphazardly to the side, and if you were more lucid you would have been embarrassed at the way it pooled onto the sheets below you.
At once, he had released the firm grip he had on your neck to push his guitar off the bed.
“Then come up here and let me show you how I would have taken care of you.”
Choso, with his eagerness to please and this newfound Herculean strength of his, didn’t give you the chance to comply with his request, because he was ripping at your flimsy underwear and shifting you around to face him. It was enough to give you whiplash, but the bruising grip he had around your waist assured that your balance wouldn’t fail you as he laid back against the unsuspecting hotel sheets and yanked you up to hover over his crazed face.
“Choso, y-you don’t have to—”
“I want to.” He pleaded, his lips glistening with an anticipatory drool as those puppy-dog eyes of his locked onto your core, and he was once again reminded of the fact that Suguru Geto had to be the dumbest man on this fucking planet. Craning his neck up, he couldn’t help himself as he dragged his hot tongue up the length of your folds, his strangled moan vibrating against you. “Mmph, sit— please.”
Leave it to Choso to not forget about his manners as he begged you to suffocate him between your trembling thighs. You complied, moving ever-so-slowly to lower yourself against him before he dug his fingers into your thighs and made you sit. Hunching forward, your forehead fell against the plush headboard with a choked cry as he all but unhinged his jaw around your core.
He watched through dazed eyes at the way your face crumpled with each symphony of pleasure that slipped past your bitten lips. There was no sense in dwelling on the past now, but he couldn’t help but feel so utterly idiotic for having been so blind all this time. It had always been there— in the lingering touches and the intimacy of trust that had forged between you two over fifteen years of falling back on one another.
Choso’s eyes rolled back as you rolled your hips against his tongue, momentarily blocking any passage of air through his mouth and nose, but, even with the clenching in his lungs that told him that he needed to breathe paired with the ringing in his ears, he thought he’d much rather have your weeping pleasure as the cause of death on his obituary, because any life where he hindered that impending high you were cravenly grinding toward wasn’t a life worth living.
His tongue dipped into your entrance for an exasperatingly brief tour before its pointed tip was dancing up to swoop under the hood of your already painfully sensitive clit. You squeaked out a pitched moan, nearly tumbling down if one of his hands hadn’t shot up to press against your sternum to keep you upright. A choked sob of pleasure shook your shoulders, and your hand flew down to tangle into the very haircut he maintained for so long just because you said it looked cute on him.
There was a sharp sting on his scalp as you yanked at the roots, the subtle pain at the hands of you nearly sending him to an early grave as his hips bucked up against the air. He was only met by the infuriatingly gentle friction of his sweatpants brushing against his leaking tip, but you were crying out his name and using him so sweetly with every craven thrust of your hips, and it was enough for him after all the sleepless nights he’d spent wishing he could have changed the past.
Evidence of you was dripping grotesquely down his face, dragging as far up as his nose that glistened proudly in the wake of your sloppy thrusts against him. His eyes were barely open by the time you timidly glanced down at him, half-lidded to match the dopey smile you felt morphing against your folds.
“Stop looking at me like that.” You murmured through burning cheeks as he leaned you back to sit on his chest.
“I’ve waited fifteen years to look at you like this.” His words were damn near slurred, but the sentiment remained the same. Brushing the dishevled hair from his forehead, you slid down slowly to straddle his waist, gasping tenderly at the feeling of his abs brushing against your sensitive clit, though your eyes never once left his.
With wanton eyes drifting down his pink-tinted face, his eyes drifted shut as he leaned up to meet the kiss he was sure he was finally about to get, but it instead landed tenderly on his forehead. A warmth spread down his spine, making his fingers curl tighter around your waist.
“Put me out of my misery already.” Choso whispered, but his actions deceived him as he reached up to keep you pressed against his forehead. Just as you slipped out of his grasp, lips dragging down the bridge of his nose until they ghosted over his. With a clouded gaze, he whispered against your lips, “Did he tell you he loved you?”
With a delirious shake of your head, you crashed through the tiniest of barriers that had been left between you.
“I love you.” He mumbled desperately against your kiss, hands sneaking up under your baggy shirt to graze along your spine. “More than just a— ah— a prom date. I love you.”
“I love you, too— more than just a friend.” You confirmed as you snuck your hand down between you to creep into his waistband.
He flinched away from you with a quick, hissing breath, reaching down to grip at your hand in record timing. Pulling away from him with a start, you blinked down owlishly at him.
“Oh— I-I’m sorry, I just thought you wanted to…”
“I do!” He sat up faster than you could blink to miss it. With that signature flush of his cheeks, he cast his gaze to the side. “Just… give me a little bit, okay?”
Raising a brow at his sudden timidness, you decided not to make it known that you had already felt the tacky wet splotch currently making a mess of his sweatpants. Saving him the wallowing self-pity you just knew he’d fall into for the rest of the night, you opted to lay beside him, tracing the tattoo that lined his nose absentmindedly as he looked anywhere but you. With a soft laugh, he finally turned his head to face you again after a moment of silence, smiling sheepishly down at you.
“Happy birthday, angel.”
Glancing over at the bedside clock, you noted with a cacooning warmth that it read 12:02 AM.
“Happy birthday, Cho.”
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I.N x Photographer Reader (fluff)
It was a cold winter afternoon when you arrived at the Damiani studio, camera bag slung over your shoulder, ready to work your magic. The shoot was for their newest line, and the buzz around the featured model, Yang Jeongin (or I.N as he was known in the industry) was palpable. You’d heard of him, of course. Known for his striking looks and sweet demeanor, he was a rising and brilliant star in music and fashion.
What you hadn’t been prepared for was the man himself.
When you walked into the studio, he was standing under the lights, just enough to give him an ethereal glow. His sharp jawline, the natural pout of his lips, and the way his soft brown eyes flicked over to meet yours as you entered, it all hit you like a freight train. You managed a polite smile as you were introduced as the photographer.
“Hi,” he said, stepping forward and extending a hand. His voice was warm, almost shy, but there was a glint in his eyes that you couldn’t quite place. “Jeongin.”
“Y/N,” you replied, shaking his hand.
He was wearing a textured cream jacket, unbuttoned to reveal his toned chest, paired with tailored ivory trousers that accentuated his long legs. It wasn’t a look you saw every day, and it wasn’t one you’d soon forget.
Your breath hitched slightly, but you masked it with professionalism, setting up your equipment with purpose. You had a job to do.
When Jeongin finally stepped onto the set, the energy shifted. He carried himself with quiet confidence, his dark hair styled slightly wet, and the unbuttoned jacket gave him an aura of effortless allure. As you started directing the shots, it became clear that he was fully aware of the effect his appearance had on everyone in the room—especially you.
“Alright, let’s start simple,” you said, raising your camera. “Give me a relaxed pose. Hands wherever you feel natural.”
Jeongin tilted his head slightly, leaning back in the chair with one arm draped over the backrest and the other resting lightly on his knee. His gaze pierced through the lens, and you could feel the heat creeping up your neck.
“Like this?” he asked, his voice soft but tinged with playful curiosity.
“Perfect,” you managed to reply, the word feeling heavy in your throat.
The shoot continued, with Jeongin shifting seamlessly between poses. Sometimes he leaned forward, the jacket sliding slightly off his shoulders, exposing even more of his skin. Other times, he ran a hand through his hair, tousling it just enough to look like he’d stepped out of a dream.
But then came the moment that caught you completely off guard.
He was adjusting his position, one hand brushing the hem of his jacket, when his eyes flicked up to meet yours. A slow, mischievous smile spread across his lips. “You’re staring, Y/N.”
Your hands froze on your camera, a nervous laugh escaping before you could stop it. “I’m the photographer, Jeongin. I’m supposed to stare.”
“Not like that,” he teased, leaning back and letting his jacket part even more. His voice dropped, his playful tone barely hiding the edge of something bolder. “It’s a good thing, though. I like the way you look at me.”
The words hung in the air, and for a moment, you were sure time stopped. The room, the lights, the murmurs of the crew—it all faded into the background.
“Back to work,” you muttered, raising your camera again in an attempt to hide the flush on your face.
His eyes locked onto yours, and there was an undeniable spark in the air.
“Perfect,” you managed, fighting to keep your voice steady.
He grinned—a small, lopsided thing that made your stomach flip—and tilted his head. “You’re good at this.”
“Thanks. So are you.”
His grin widened. “Are you always this professional?”
The teasing caught you off guard. You paused, lowering the camera slightly, and gave him a look. “I’d hope so. That’s my job.”
“I’m just saying,” he continued, his voice dropping to a lower, more playful tone, “you could smile at me more. It’d make my job easier.”
Your lips parted in surprise, heat rushing to your face. Was this the famously shy Jeongin? You quickly hid behind the camera again. “Eyes on the lens, Jeongin,” you said, trying to sound authoritative.
“Yes, ma’am,” he replied, the smirk audible in his tone.
As the shoot progressed, Jeongin’s playful energy only grew. He started cracking jokes between takes, asking you about your favorite movies, what you liked to do in your free time, and even cheekily requesting a playlist to make his “posing less boring.”
“You’re really good at what you do. And…” He paused, his gaze flicking to your lips for the briefest second before meeting your eyes again. “You’re kind of amazing.”
You froze, unsure if you’d heard him right. So you made him think that you didn’t hear, but your cheeks were burning.
Jeongin didn’t make it easy for you. Throughout the rest of the shoot, his gaze lingered a little too long, his smiles became a little too suggestive, and his teasing comments left you flustered in ways you weren’t used to.
When the shoot finally wrapped, you busied yourself packing up your gear, hoping to escape before he could corner you again. But, of course, Jeongin was one step ahead.
“Y/N,” he called out, his voice smooth as he approached you.
You turned to find him standing just a few feet away, his jacket still undone, the gold cross necklace catching the light. He looked unfairly good, even with a faint sheen of sweat from the hours under the studio lights.
He was standing so close now, the faint scent of his cologne filling your senses.
“Need something?” you asked, trying to sound casual.
He stepped even closer, his voice dropping to a near-whisper. “I’ll take the risk. Have dinner with me?”
You blinked up at him, your brain scrambling for a response. “Dinner?”
“Yeah. You have to eat, right? And so do I. It only makes sense,” he said with a grin, his confidence now shining through any remnants of shyness.
There was no way to fight the smile tugging at your lips. “You’re impossible.”
“And you’re beautiful,” he countered smoothly, his hand brushing yours as if testing the waters. “Say yes.”
Against your better judgment—or maybe because of it—you nodded. “Yes.”
His grin was dazzling, and you couldn’t help but laugh at the sheer joy in his expression.
——
The dinner was nothing short of magical. Jeongin was attentive, witty, and so effortlessly charming that you found yourself forgetting the world outside the little booth where you sat, laughing over shared stories and stolen glances.
By the time he walked you back to your car, the air between you was charged with an unspoken tension. He leaned against the driver’s side door, his hands casually in his pockets, watching you with a look that made your knees weak.
“Thanks for tonight,” you said softly, your breath visible in the cool night air.
“Don’t thank me yet,” he replied, his tone teasing but his gaze serious.
You tilted your head. “Why not?”
“Because I don’t want it to end tonight,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper.
Your heart raced as he reached out, his fingers brushing a stray strand of hair from your face. The touch was light, but it sent a shiver down your spine.
“You’re dangerous, Jeongin,” you murmured, unable to hide the smile that tugged at your lips.
“Only for you,” he replied, leaning in just enough that you could feel the warmth of his breath.
The kiss didn’t happen—not quite. Instead, he hovered there, his lips barely brushing the corner of your mouth, leaving you breathless and wanting more.
“Goodnight, Y/N,” he said, pulling back just enough to meet your eyes.
The promise in his gaze was clear. This was only the beginning.
You watched him walk away, your heart pounding as you slipped into your car.
For someone who was supposed to be shy, Yang Jeongin was proving to be anything but. And you couldn’t wait to see where this unexpected connection would take you next.
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Hi hi~ It's my birthday and I'm running on fumes. So- How would the Ro's celebrate MC's birthday with them if the MC doesn't mind doing whatever/doesn't plan to do anything special? I'm desperate for Ardent... WHO SAID THAT??
Happy Birthday!!!! 🎂🎈🎉 I hope you've had a good one. I'm going to throw it under a cut because it somehow ended up being almost 2k words! Ardent is just as desperate, he's just in denial!
❤️ Cam - First off, would MC mind getting a piercing? Cam would be thrilled to get matching ear piercings with them. But if that’s not their thing, he’d suggest something more subtle, like matching jewelry. Maybe one of those permanent bracelets that are soldered on—a small but meaningful reminder of their bond.
Cam is up for anything, truly. If MC wants to stay in and have a cozy night watching movies, he’s already pulling up his favorite food apps and ordering takeout from three different places. But if MC feels adventurous, he’s all in. One of those indoor trampoline parks? Perfect—just give him a second to grab some Dramamine first. Whatever the plan, he’s ready to make the day unforgettable.
And at the end of the night, Cam has one last surprise: a scrapbook. “Old school, I know,” he says with a sheepish grin as he hands it over.
The pages are filled with his favorite memories. Photos from his point of view, capturing the little moments that mattered most to him over the years. There’s a whole section dedicated to the doggo (because, of course), and even a page or two with G, reflecting the years of shared friendship. And yes, there are even photos of MC with Chris—but Chris has been carefully, and a little dramatically, cut out of every one.
Cam shrugs, a faint blush coloring his cheeks as he fidgets with the edge of one of the photos. “I couldn’t just throw them out,” he murmurs, running his fingers along the edges of the picture. His voice softens as he glances at MC, the corners of his mouth lifting in a lopsided smile. “You looked too good.”
💙 G - They never truly enjoyed their birthday, especially since it’s on Valentine’s Day. But MC changed that for them. Even when they weren’t together, MC still made sure to bake G a cake, showing how much they cared and G wants to do the same.
This year, G had been planning it for a while. They wanted everything to be just right—a nice dinner out on the town, the kind of place that serves those tiny, fancy portions. But when they hear MC’s stomach growling later that night, G would laugh and take them back to the kitchen to whip up a big, hearty meal, just the way they like it.
Afterward, they’d take MC on a walk, retracing steps to places they’d always wanted to show them back when they weren’t speaking. They would begin reminiscing about those late-night strolls they used to share in school.
G would have two gifts for MC. The first is something they’ve kept all this time (spoiler, i can't say what it is since you will be able to receive this item and place it in your MC's room). The second is a sweater. Not to replace the one they absolutely stole, by the way—no, of course not. This one is different. It’s a sweater G has worn over the years, one they’ve thought about MC wearing, imagining them wrapped up in its warmth.
And to end the night, G would surprise MC with a homemade cake, the icing meticulously decorated with the image of their dog. It’s not perfect, a tad lopsided, the color a little off.
💚 Kara - Oh, MC is getting spoiled. If they’re down for pampering, then Kara is going all out. First up, the best massage money can buy—only the best for MC. Kara will even attempt to bake them cookies… and we all know how that is going to go. When that inevitably doesn’t pan out, she’ll pivot to taking MC out for dinner. Fine dining, of course. Is a seven-course meal too much? Probably. Should she have asked beforehand? Definitely.
Kara doesn’t have the shared history with MC that Cam and G do, and she knows it. So, in a rare moment of thoughtfulness, she’ll invite Em along, intent on building a better relationship with MC and making the night truly special.
To top it off, Kara would rent a luxurious hotel for the night. Yes, MC can eat the snacks in the minibar—she’s paying. She’d try to whisk MC out of the country for a weekend getaway, but when their schedule doesn’t allow it, she’ll opt for the next best thing: a staycation. A weekend of indulgence, relaxation, and Kara-style bonding.
Her real gift, though, is far more personal: a key to her place, accompanied by a bouquet of flowers. The same flowers she once gave MC years ago—though back then, Chris had claimed the credit. This time, Kara makes sure there’s no doubt where they came from.
💛 M - One thing about Mar: they really like to have a plan. Whether it’s outlining their novel or taking MC out on a date, having a plan helps them prepare for what’s to come. So, if you happen to look through M’s search history, don’t be surprised if you come across things like:
"How to give your partner the best birthday"
"How much tongue is too much tongue? Techniques for French kissing"
And last but certainly not least, “What exactly is Netflix and chill?” (Had to include that, especially with a planned snippet!)
The first thing M can think to do is take MC somewhere special. Not to an anime convention (though they already bought tickets and even wanted to plan couple costumes—they had to talk themselves down from that). Instead, M decides on a place they don’t get to visit often, a place they love: home. And not their apartment, but their childhood home, the house their mothers still own.
M doesn’t get much time away from work or book tours, so this will be one of the few opportunities they can actually take MC. Since MC is up for anything, it doesn’t dawn on M until later that they’re essentially taking MC to meet the parents. Truthfully, M is more nervous than MC. At home, though, M is much more confident—they know what they’re doing and where to go. It’s one of the few times M feels completely sure of themselves. The trip is a success. M had already told their mothers about MC so of course they end up adoring MC even more.
As for a gift, M isn’t sure what to give. They hope that their presence—their trust, adoration, and love—will be enough. But just in case, M has a backup. They pull out their finished novel, ready for store shelves. Normally, M keeps the first published copy for themselves, but this time, they don’t. They want MC to see the first page after opening the cover—a heartfelt dedication, to none other than MC.
💜 Isaac - Isaac has never gotten this far with a partner since their ex. They’ve never allowed themselves to care for someone that deeply, not until MC. So when Isaac finally allows themselves to openly care for MC, they want to make it count. They want to do for MC what their mother used to do for them, even going so far as to bake their mother’s cake recipe. Listen, Isaac can cook—baking, though, is a little iffy. So it won’t be perfect, but it will be made from the heart. Just like the day Isaac has planned: something as simple as running errands, spending time together, sharing quiet moments. It’s something Isaac, admittedly, took for granted early on in their relationship.
Now, they don’t hold back as much. Isaac openly tells MC how they feel, how much they care for them, and shows it as well. The list of people who care about Isaac is minuscule, and they don’t take that for granted. They’re open to any thoughts MC has for the day, any question about Isaac’s past, or their job that they’d kept hidden for so long. Isaac’s willing to share even the details about their parents.
The gift is simple. No, it’s not free reign over Isaac’s car—nice try. It’s a plant, a cat-safe flower because Isaac knows Cupid likes to visit. They’ve taken care of it for a while, making sure it’ll survive before giving it to MC. But the flower itself isn’t what’s important. What matters is the sentiment behind it—the idea of nurturing something so it can grow.
It’s a promise from Isaac, a vow that they won’t stop working on themselves, that they won’t stop fighting for their relationship with MC. It’s the promise of being honest, with MC, with themselves, and accepting just how much they care for one another.
🖤 Ardent - MC would wake up gently, kissed softly on the lips, greeted with breakfast in bed. He’d actually been prepping it since the day before, and when Ardent cooks, he really goes all out. He doesn’t mess around. That means MC’s day isn’t just about breakfast—it’s also lunch, dinner, and his special baklava. There are so many ways the day can go, especially if his uncle tries to rope him into helping close the bar (he won’t, because today is all about MC).
Though MC insists they don’t care what they do for the day, Ardent can’t accept that. He wants nothing more than to make it special for them. Ardent’s life has changed so much since MC came into it. They’ve helped him understand just how important it is to open up, to stop keeping people at arm’s length. He would be lost without them, and he wants to show his appreciation for all they’ve done for him.
He never expected his mom to fly in when he told her it was MC’s birthday, nor did he plan for his cousins or his uncle to join in. He wasn’t surprised when his niece showed up with a handmade gift, though she lied and claimed Ardent got it for MC, afraid that he’d forgotten. He could never forget.
MC gets a big party, and while he knows it might not be their ideal, he apologizes later in the day. There’s one thing Ardent has always wanted to do with MC, ever since that day they rushed Cupid to the emergency vet. He’s a bit sentimental, sure. But he can’t help it, especially when he ties a little note to Cupid’s collar for MC to find late at night, when she curls up next to them.
Who would’ve imagined that Ardent Pine writes love notes? Even worse, he doodles hearts. Yeah, he won’t live that down, but it’s something he’s come to accept. And he’s hoping his gift will be something MC can accept, too. An invitation to become a bigger part of his life and of Cupid’s. The note includes a crude drawing of a cat and a message:
As much as I love Cupid, I never could’ve imagined you’d love her too. That you’d care for her when I was such an as- (the swear is scribbled out) jerk. I never could’ve imagined you’d worm your way into my heart—and hers. So, whaddya say, trouble? Will you have us?
Ardent takes a deep breath, his face looking calm as ever. But MC notices the slight twitch of his fingers in his pockets—something he does when he’s nervous. His eyes meet theirs for a moment, and then he simply says, “Move in with me.”
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Hiii can I please request number 7 + Blade? I really enjoy the way you write him. Thank you if you end up doing this!
Thank you for the ask Anon. I appreciate you telling me that you enjoy the way I write Blade, he's my current favourite character and I'd love it if people wanted to talk to me more about him. I hope you enjoy. Comments/reblogs greatly appreciated.
cw. light angst, hurt/comfort, mentions of blood, gender neutral reader, chubby reader, minors DO NOT interact
7. Lightly kissing on top of a freshly formed bruise.
Prompts
Your room smelled of disinfectant and medicinal salves. It clogged your nose when you breathed deep, a pinch forming between your furrowed brow as you slowly and meticulously wrap fresh bandages around Blade’s exposed bicep. You had to discard his jacket, the material slashed and tattered laying in a bloody heap long forgotten on the floor as you gave your undivided attention to Blade.
He thinks it's a wasted effort but he lets you do as you please. His free hand is resting in your lap, fingers lazily curled into your thigh until the soft skin squished beneath his touch. You feel incredibly warm beneath the tips of his fingers as he stared at you, absentmindedly watching you work patch up his wounds. Wounds that would naturally heal themselves, just another chip on his scarred and haggard body. Your attentiveness wasn’t needed when he was cursed to constantly heal but you always kicked up a fuss whenever he returned to you in a bloody heap, supporting fresh wounds and a tired look in his eyes.
It was a little awkward for you shuffling around Blade as you worked. You were practically, almost in his lap as you hovered over him on the bed, the sheets already drying with flakes of blood and whatever else Blade had dragged in the door with him. The sheets needed to be changed as soon as you got the chance. The stench of decay and death was particularly strong on him today. It almost made you blanch. The tips of your fingers grazed the top of his bicep as you finished wrapping the bandage around him, your lips pressed into a tight, thin line as a pensive frown plagued your facade. You eventually had to stuff your bottom lip between the pinch of your teeth to stop it from quivering as you blinked rapidly to dispel the wetness clinging to the edges of your thick lashes.
“Don’t give me that look” Blade said, his quiet murmur cutting through the thick silence.
You released your bruised lip from between your teeth as your gaze now flickered up to his face, his piercing red stare causing a shiver to creep along the notches of your spine. You sniffled softly, unshed crystalline tears still vehemently beading at the corners of your eyes and making your vision a little blurry.
“What look?” you asked as you reached for another bottle of medicinal salve.
Blade gently caught your wrist before you could grab it, preventing you from swiping it off the little bedside table nestled close to you. Your hand started to shake and he could feel the tremble of your pulse when he pressed his fingers into your wrist. You peered up at him beneath the hood of your lashes as they fluttered over your round cheeks.
“That look” Blade said. “Sadness doesn’t suit you.”
Something tugged on your heart strings. You were sad because of him. Because it hurt you to see his body so battered and bruised. It hurt you whenever he said you were wasting your time patching him up. He would naturally regenerate, such was his curse. It was barely a comforting thought. Too many bad thoughts plagued your head like a persistent swarm of insects, their buzzing incessant and never ceasing no matter how many times you tried to swat them away. You took a shuddering breath.
“It brings me no joy seeing you in pain.”
Tears threatened to spill down your cheeks and before they could, Blade was drawing you into his lap. You complained at first, not wanting your weight to hurt him in any way but he batted away your protests. He coiled his arms around your plump waist, giving your soft stomach a gentle squeeze as you were coddled in his lap, your thick thighs falling beside his as you were forced to sit on top of him. It felt a little ridiculous. He was the patient, not you. Blade wasn’t good with words. He didn’t know how to tell you not to worry. He couldn’t weave words like countless others he knew could. He lacked tact when it came to delicate matters and he knew his blunt words were only going to cause you further distress. You didn’t treat him like a weapon, the way he believed he deserved to be treated. You were too kind and soft hearted. You have no reason to be so close to him, when his sharp edges could cut into your soft skin and hurt you. Yet, you give your kindness to him so freely and easily, despite one wrong whisper of the mara threatening to creep in. He could hurt you. But you knew he wouldn’t. He’d rather fall on his sword than intentionally hurt you, mara or not.
You hid your tear stained face from his sight, lips pressed to the purple and red bruises forming over his skin as they bled into his skin. These too would fade soon and the press of your plush lips was the healing balm. Blade slowly rubbed his hands along your back, his calloused fingers aching when he smoothed them against your pillowy soft skin. You were so incredibly soft and warm it was already lulling him into a state of peace. He can feel your salty tears wet his skin and it only makes him squeeze your soft waist harder.
“Blade, can you please be a little more careful?” you softly requested. “If not for your sake, then for mine?”
He’s not sure you know what you’re asking of him. The way you had worded it, he’s unsure if it was intentional or not. Because it was exceedingly hard for Blade to refuse a request from you. Not when you ask it in such a sticky sweet voice that he can feel it rotting on the back of his teeth when you say his name like that. He was rough and sharp around the edges but only you were able to soften it up and dull it. You made him feel like he wanted to be good. Only wanted to be good just for you. No one else. Your skin squishes under his touch as his large, scarred hands touch your soft stomach, a soft hum stirring in the back of his throat as you plant another soft kiss on his bruises.
“Just for you” he replied.
He didn’t elaborate further and you hoped it was a promise he was going to keep. It brought a little smile to your face as you wrapped your arms around Blade’s neck, hugging him closer to your body as you tangled your hands in the baby hairs lining the nape of his neck. For now, it was enough.
#my writing#request#anon#hsr#honkai star rail#hsr x reader#honkai star rail x reader#hsr blade#hsr blade x reader#blade x reader#x reader#x chubby reader#gn!reader
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new oc/sona yaaaaaay!
oh how i wish i had all those piercings (bridge come back to me💔)
can we guess where his name came from gang (suspiciously username shaped name)
i actually really enjoy his character design and i literally color picked his color pallet from a diagram(?) that shows how a bruise heals and it worked out LMAOO sooo new character design life hack
more info and lots of general yapping about him after the break if you care to read :3 and i yap a LOT i have lots to say about him bc its been a while since i genuinely developed an oc LMAO
cw for LOTS and LOTS of talk of death if you do decide to read! just in case :3
first of all you may be thinking “5’6? short king!” and i will have you know i actually made him taller than i am irl by a few inches LMAOOO whoops t boy swag will do that to ya
anyways the thing about his color pallet being based off of that of a literal bruise IS actually relevant because he is literally immortal and is CONSTANTLY getting injured like all the time. i think conveying info about characters via their color pallets is fun and i wanna do more of it so hehe. plus green and red and purple are a nice combo and it worked out very well :3 also another little note about his design: he’s a very creative and artistic person and i wanted to show that through his clothes being somehow modified and i think i did that well too. trying to properly get back into making actually decent and thoughtful character designs so im proud of myself :3
that being said his immortality causes him a SHIT load of problems. i feel like being immortal would really suck LMAO but more-so i feel like i dont see people do much with the idea of immortality in terms of horror or at least not from what i’ve seen. like im still figuring out his lore but the basics are: he has no clue who his dad is and found out he was immortal at a somewhat young age but literally his entire life he’s been viewed as just kind of off?? like he looks human and for the most part acts it but he just has certain traits that humans…. do not have. his eyes glow in pics like a nocturnal animal’s would and his teeth are suspiciously sharp and he gets weird cravings for raw meat which he can somehow digest perfectly fine with absolutely no issue but he’s not like OVERTLY some otherworldly creature he’s just a little weird. a tad strange even. possibly even kind of unsettling depending on who you ask.
and i like to imagine these are a lot of things that were present in his childhood too, like his mother would wake up to the sound of rummaging in the kitchen and find him at the ripe old age of five just gnawing at a whole raw steak in the dark. he’s just sort of always been like that and didn’t realize it was weird until he was older. (is a lot of this used as metaphors for undiagnosed neurodiversity/mental illness? …..iii dont knowwww :3 (yes) (although not every aspect of him is a total reflection of myself, he is still his own character in many respects lolol))
but in general this ends up causing him all sorts of issues in all sorts of millions of ways. for one he has sort of a fragile sense of self because he doesn’t even know what he is?? he knows he can’t just be a regular old human because of all the previously mentioned reasons and a few more, but that aside he has no idea what he is. he also doesn’t know pretty much anything about how his immortality works beyond what he’s experienced and what the others have told him during the times when he’s “dead,” he has no idea how his aging is affected by it because he seems to be aging relatively normally so far, he has no clue if he will EVER die for good/if there’s any way to kill him, he has no idea how his body seems to heal the most insane fatal injuries as if nothing happened, and much more quickly than a normal human would, he kinda doesn’t know jack shit about himself and it pisses him off a little bit!
it also has just caused him lots of trauma as you can probably imagine. lots of dissociation everywhere he looks
moving on to how his immortality actually works: like i said there’s only so much he knows about it but this is all the info he knows so far. he CAN “die” but all of his deaths are temporary. that is to say that his body will eventually heal and regenerate itself and he will come back. it’s not like deadpool where he can get stabbed in the head and go about the rest of his day like nothing happened, he might be able to keep himself up for a while to fight back or run away but it wont be long before he drops dead for a few days or so. during said time his body outwardly does seem very dead. he’s unresponsive and still and isn’t blinking or nothing and his pupils are blown (which he already has huge pupils but yk), like if you were to just show him to someone they’d be like “yeah that’s absolutely a corpse and also why would you show this to me.” but his body is still alive in a sense, it’s just sort of… yknow when you put a computer into sleep mode?? upon first glance it’s gonna look like it’s off but inwardly things are still going on. his body is still working to regenerate itself the whole time, even if whatever he sustained that “killed” him would very much not be healable or survivable by any normal person. in his POV, he just sort of gets knocked out for a while and then wakes up exhausted and sore and absolutely FAMISHED. like he could easily eat a horse without any exaggeration the boy can eat.
he’s also always been interested in horror and the supernatural and crime and shit and is largely desensitized to that sort of stuff from that + experiencing a lot of different deaths himself bc of the whole immortality thing paired with him being generally reckless when he was younger because what’s it gonna do? kill him? (“what’re you gonna do, jeff the kill me?” -him at jeff moments before being stabbed, probably) he says he doesn’t care but it actually effects him deeply in ways he doesn’t understand for a while. as he gets older he becomes less reckless and doesn’t throw himself into dangerous situations as often.
all that being said he’s not necessarily all that dangerous himself?? he carries his dagger around with him for protection or cutting up meat and apples or woodcarving more than anything and as a proxy he works a lot more as just an… observer. despite his name he’s not really all for the killing people stuff if he can help it unlike many of the others, if anything his name more so refers to the fact that HE’S usually the one getting slashed up. (it’s actually just bc of my username but shhhhhh) but generally he much prefers to be in the background keeping watch or scoping things out or just sort of… stalking people basically. dont ask me how he manages to be stealthy in THAT outfit… he manages somehow i swear 😔
but yknow overall he’s not an incredible threat to most people, the “creepy” part of him being a creepypasta comes a lot more just from how much it would suck to be in his shoes as just a guy who happens to be immortal but still able to experience the pain of death over and over again. he isn’t the creepy thing as much as his entire life experience is LOL. usually he’s just unsettling and disturbing at most.
he also has a VERY complex relationship with BEN in my AU specifically (WHICH RANDOM DISCLAIMER TIME: NOT THE LITTLE 12 YEAR OLD VERSION NOOOOO EW my au’s BEN is like a combo of “fanon” him and behavioral event network he is not 12 years old and i dont want him being shipped with anything NEAR that version of him, ONLY my AU’s version who is 19. im not a freak. 💔 they’re not a couple anyway (BEN🤝slasher -> being aro) but i did wanna preface that just in case bc im not trying to get misinterpreted like that) might write more about that sometime… bc their relationship has a lot of symbolism and complexity bc BEN is my fav character ever period and yes i am gonna write him and my self insert oc as being incredibly deeply intertwined bc i love him and cringe culture can kick rocks and therapy is difficult to get :3 oc x canon shippers platonic or romantic yall will always be safe on my blog frfr
im gonna post more about BEN soon too…. literally working on actually making a proper design for him rn which is mostly just difficult bc i cannot for the life of me think of what to give this freak to wear. i need them to serve cunt but like….. how do i do that 💔💔 that one BEN design i reblogged that gave him the adorable little heels….. absolutely genius………. u know who u are :3
more random rapid fire fun facts about him bc why not: he loves piercings and tattoos and body mods bc they heal so easily for him, he has his tongue split! (NEEEED to do one day actually my dream body mod), his immortality doesn’t seem to effect his ability to get sick which he HATES but when he does get sick it only lasts for a day or so and he’s a total drama queen the whole time, he loves to sew (though only by hand, he’s genuinely afraid of sewing machines) and will patch up or modify clothes for his friends or other proxies if they ask, his favorite kind of raw meat is boar, and his favorite cooked meat is a tie between pork (boar or domestic pig) and chicken, he wears his headphones most of the time bc he loves music and sounds can sometimes overstimulate him, and BEN can talk to him through them because of course he can, he loves animals and actually has way more empathy for them than for humans, and he absolutely LOVES medical dramas and does not care that a lot of the actual medical parts are inaccurate he will eat them up. he WILL be caught staying up until 6am watching chicago med and he will not apologize.
ANYWAY i think that’s about it actually. if anyone actually read all my ramblings…. i love u /p u mean very much to me /p
i WILL be yapping more soon (except probably about the actual “canon” pastas hehe) :3
#creepypasta oc#creepypasta oc art#art#digital art#small artist#artists on tumblr#my artwork#creepypasta#creepypasta fandom#my sona#artist sona#sona art#self sona#sona redesign#i yap too much#like way way way too much#ITS MY BLOG I CAN DO WHAT I WANT i scream as they drag me into the padded cell#seriously tho if u read everything… thank you LOL#i don’t expect anyone to i just love to ramble#i have lots and lots of thoughts in my brain#speaking of i would LOVE to make a creepypasta comic someday like seriously#i just…. need to do a lot of writing#and drawing#but hopefully i will one day#:3
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━━━━ IT REMAINS
pairing: johnny “soap” mactavish x psychiatrist!reader
4.3k. after being shot in the head, johnny works with a psychiatrist to get his life back. **contains dark themes - read at your own risk.
It’s a tick.
Nine. That’s how many hash marks make up the upper margin of your notes. That’s how many times Sergeant MacTavish has rubbed the spot on his forehead where he was shot months ago. If you listen closely you can hear the pad of his thumb race along the grown out hairs of his mohawk.
It’s how he gives himself quiet comfort. When you ask him a question that makes him feel squeamish, he absentmindedly runs his finger along it. You’d have more hash marks if you deigned to keep track at the beginning of your session but this is only the first time you’re meeting him. You’ve also gotten farther than any of his other psychiatrists thus far. 32 minutes in.
His first psychiatrist, Dr. Williams is great. Phenomenal, actually. Old school, nearing his late fifties — he showed you the ropes when you started here. You thought for sure his calm demeanor would be just what MacTavish needed. He made it approximately 17 minutes into the session.
You’re not even sure Dr. Williams was able to get an answer out of him that day. You were here; heard the raised voice of Sergeant MacTavish. Watched as one of the Lieutenants who accompanied him dragged him out. Dr. Williams left his office a few minutes after that, pink-faced and flustered. The only time you’ve ever seen him like that.
MacTavish went through two other psychiatrists before landing in your lap. Why me? you couldn’t help but think. What could I possibly have that they don’t? You’re the youngest psychiatrist here by a mile. Fresh meat. A larva who has yet to transform, metamorphose.
He’s been staring at the same speck on your carpet for a few minutes now. You saw this faraway look in his eyes at the beginning of the session. Those piercing blues fogged over, mist on the lake. Pupils pinpricked.
His leg bounces slightly. Sweat glistens on his upper lip. Talking about what happened, bringing up that day is what has set him off in other sessions before. You weren’t ready to breach the subject until a few minutes ago.
“Johnny?” you try again, gingerly. He didn’t like when you called him Sergeant MacTavish earlier.
“Doc?” he says calmly, as if you haven’t been waiting in silence for him to answer your question.
“Would you like me to repeat the question?”
He sucks his teeth. Ponders. You let him. If there’s anything you’ve observed about his behavior thus far is that he does not like to be pushed, likely due to the fact that he simply needs more time than before. With a TBI like his, it’s not shocking. Memory loss and concentration issues are almost a guarantee. Along with the other symptoms he’s been experiencing — mood changes, difficulty sleeping, sensitivity to sound — and that’s only what you’ve been able to gather so far from his own admissions this session and the notes from those very brief prior ones.
“I dinnae want ta talk about it,” he finally says.
“Alright,” you answer simply. Calmly.
His shoulders visibly slacken at that.
You wonder if he expected you to push him. And, had this not been your first session, you may have. But not this time. He’s not ready for that yet.
He does surprise you, however. When Sergeant MacTavish makes it the full hour, you award him with an honest smile.
“This is a great step forward, Johnny. I’m proud of you.”
You look down at your slightly smudged notes, the air still heavy with the scent of fresh ink. Notes on Johnny’s sisters, parents, home. How he imagines his life in the future — back home to the Highlands, maybe a little cottage in the woods, walking distance to his relatives. Surrounded by family — a wife, children. Animals. Fending for himself and his family. Providing.
It’s… sweet. His fantasy of the future. You imagine in different circumstances he might have been an ideal husband. He has a protective instinct that drives him in everything he does. A wolf defending his pack. Maw dripping with the blood of those who would stand to hurt anyone he loves.
“Thanks, Doc.”
He scratches the scar again as he stands up. It’s still raised — pink flesh that draws your eye in. He waits for you, maybe the most awkward you’ve seen him thus far. You stand and offer your hand. His engulfs yours. He holds it tight, like letting go of you will make him slip out of reality again.
“Next week, same time?” You hate the phrase as soon as it comes out, making you sound like every movie shrink ever, but routine is important for him right now.
He swallows thickly and nods his head, finally letting go of your hand. You walk him to the exit, to the waiting Lieutenant. He goes without a fuss.
You don’t run into any problems until a few sessions later.
He’s agitated, but hasn’t told you why yet. You give him time, give him space. Let him work out what he wants to tell you. The Newton’s cradle that usually occupies your desktop is shoved in a drawer. Silence envelops the two of you, other than his ragged breathing as he tries to get ahold of his emotions.
You’re not sure how long you’ve been holding your own breath but you allow some oxygen into your lungs. You feel like you’re standing at the door of an airplane and he’s the one strapping your parachute. Checking for rips and tears. Making sure the deployment handle is secure.
“Johnny?” you murmur. Wait.
He rubs his scar.
“Lonely,” he blurts out.
“That’s to be expected,” you hum as your finger absentmindedly brushes across the large CONFIDENTIAL in red ink that runs across his folder. He hasn’t been allowed to talk to any family or friends. They all think he’s dead until the man who killed him is in custody and — while you have your disagreements on whether or not that is the best course of action for him — you don’t outrank the military men who made this decision.
“Yer the only friend I get ta see.”
You hesitate and realize that was your error as soon as his face drops.
“We’re friends, no?”
You give him a genuine smile. “I’m your psychiatrist, Johnny.”
“Said ya wanted what’s best for me. Said ya cared.” He’s agitated, fist clenched and shaking against his thigh. He strokes his scar in quick succession with his other hand. His usually serene, handsome face is contorted, as if what he’s hearing is causing him physical pain. He is seconds away from another episode.
“That is true and I meant it when I said it.”
He unfurls his fist but his fingertip never leaves his head. “So we’re friends then?”
You shouldn’t placate him with confirmation. If it were any other patient, you wouldn’t. You would stop this in its tracks, before anything has time to bloom. Cut out the dead root before it rots the rest of the plant. But it’s him — and you can’t be another in a long list of people who have failed him.
“Yes Johnny. We’re… friends.”
He beams at you and you think you see a piece of Johnny from before the accident. The golden retriever energy you suspect made up his personality. The finger on the scar stills.
“I knew you were the right one for me, Doc.”
You make it through three months with him.
“Bonnie flowers,” he nods towards the vase on your desk.
Lily of the valley, baby’s breath and red roses encompassed in a simple glass vase with a lilac satin bow. No note, but it was your birthday week and you figured one of your friends or parents just forgot to add one. You’ll figure out who sent it later.
“Mmm, they are.”
You level him with a look.
“You’re avoiding my question, Johnny,” you remark. He’s had enough sessions with you, become comfortable enough for you to be able to challenge him a bit. He sinks further into the couch and you sit up straighter, closer to the edge of your seat, not letting him run away from the question with physical distance. “Can we talk about this?” you ask his permission.
There’s a tick in his jaw as he mulls it over, eyes never leaving the flowers. You wait, unsure what his reaction will be.
“Can I say no?”
You nod. “You can always say no to me, Johnny. Though, it’s easier for me to help you if you say yes.”
He looks down at his lap, hands folded neatly. The hair on his arms escapes from his long sleeve a little bit. He rubs a knuckle.
“Ya ken I trust ya, Doc, it’s just…” he pinches his brow together, eyes shut as he brings a hand to his head. He hunches over slightly.
“Johnny?” his name lingers in the air. The physical distress he shows gives you heartburn, acid creeping up your throat. He groans, and pushes his fingertips so hard against his forehead you’re sure it’ll bruise.
The bottle of water is in your hands before you realize what you’re doing — standing from your seat and sitting next to him on the couch in your office. You offer it and he lets his hand idle on yours for a second before removing the lid and taking a long sip.
He sighs in relief and lets his muscles relax, leaning backwards into the sofa. A warm, massive hand settles on your knee and you startle but don’t recoil. It would set him back if you pulled away.
“I’m not ready, Doc,” he croaks, and the crack in his voice breaks your heart.
“Alright, Johnny,” you soothe. You grab the back of the hand resting on your knee and squeeze before standing up to return to your chair. “That’s alright. Take your time.”
A knock on your office surprises you a few nights later.
It’s late on a Friday night — you should have been home by now, but you had few things to wrap up before your week off. Notes to finish, information to chart. You were only slightly worried about Johnny, hoping one week off wouldn’t regress him any. At the end of his last session, you made sure to spend some time telling him that you wouldn’t see him next week. You emphasized that you’d be back the following week and would resume as normal.
There’s nothing you hate more than disrupting his routine. It’s been paramount to his recovery thus far. Last week his physician requested an MRI to update his brain imaging, since there hasn’t been any since the incident and it set him off. He only calmed down once you were paged and arrived — stripped yourself of any metal, put on two different pairs of ear plugs and sat vigil next to him on the scanner — your hand brushing against his exposed leg in a soothing motion as his head was inside the tube.
You wonder who could possibly be here at this time of night. As far as you know, you were the last one, but someone else could have easily had a late patient that you weren’t aware of.
The doorknob turns before you can reach it.
Johnny stands in the opening to your office. He is visibly distressed, sweat glistening on his brow. His fingers flex and squeeze as he walks in and closes your office door behind him, hard enough that you jump where you stand.
“Hello, Johnny. What brings you here so late? Where’s your escort?”
He’s still looking off in the distance as he approaches you. You hold your ground, tilting your chin up slightly to look at him. Now that he’s in front of you it’s easier to see how ragged his breathing is, how hard he’s fighting for control over his emotions.
“Do you want to sit?” you try again.
He doesn’t respond, simply holds his ground as you talk. His eyes flicker back and forth as he ponders something. Is he trying to use the calming techniques you’ve taught him?
Your fingers twitch, almost reaching out on instinct to grab his wrist. He sucks in a large breath, his chest nearly brushing against yours as he does. The hairs on your scalp tickle as you feel his exhale caress your face. Patiently, you wait for him. You’re used to this. Sometimes he needs a moment.
“Ye cannae just…” he starts then stops, pinching his eyes shut as he gets his thoughts together. He inhales deeply again before continuing, his voice more desperate. “Why’re ye leaving me, Doc?”
“I’m not leaving you, Johnny. I’ll be back the week after next.”
The line of his jaw sharpens as he clenches his teeth. His fingers continue to flex and contract, half moons indenting the skin of his palm as he does. The thin wire holding him together is about to break and you’re standing in the middle of the debris field.
“I’ll tell ye about it,” he pleads. He brings his hand up to cup your jaw and you hold your ground. Johnny has never frightened you, no matter how many times you’ve seen him agitated. You know, down to your core, he would never hurt you — so you stay still, let him make physical contact. “I’ll tell ye everything.” He dangles the bait over you like you’re a starving animal. The thing you’ve been waiting for all these sessions. A thumb traces the slope of your cheek.
“Okay,” you agree, bringing your hand up to lightly hold against the one stroking you. You wrap your fingers around his and pull his hand off your face. “We’ll talk about it when I return, alright?”
Wrong move.
He snaps.
Before you can react, Johnny grips the back of your neck and pulls you firmly to his chest. His other arm locks itself around your waist. You gasp, breathing in the scent of him as your face is pressed tightly to his body. Your hands fly up to push yourself away but it’s no use. Johnny is carved from stone, immovable, statuesque. He doesn’t crush you, only holds you as his arms lock in place. Your stiffened frame moves with his chest, his rapid breathing competing over the sound of your own.
Panic creeps into your throat, tightening the noose. You know Johnny would never harm you, but you’re not quite certain the lengths he would go when he’s feeling threatened — and right now he’s feeling very threatened.
Fingers wrap around the hair at your nape as he pulls your head back. He kisses you hard and it’s a battle of teeth and tongue as you try to back away from it, remove yourself from the situation. You whine in protest and Johnny groans.
Finally his mouth releases yours. Panting, you gasp for air.
“Johnny… this is… highly inappropriate,” you wheeze.
He looks into your eyes lovingly, as if his stare could keep you in place forever.
“Kept the flowers I gave ye,” he breathes.
Your eyes widen in realization. “You? You’re the one who sent those to me?”
A wide grin splits his face. “My girl’s birthday. ‘Course I did.”
You try not to focus on the fact that he knew when your birthday was — something you definitely did not share with him. “Johnny… I’m your psychiatrist.”
“Yer my friend. Said it yerself. Said a lot of things, hen. ‘We’re in this together’, ‘I’ll do whatever it takes to help ye’, ‘Rely on me, even on bad days’,” he leans in, nose pressed to your hair and taking a whiff. “Cannae let you go… no’ now.”
You try pushing yourself off him again to no avail. “Johnny…”
With both arms now wrapped around your middle, he lifts you with ease, setting your ass down gently on top of your desk. He brushes a stray hair out of your face. “Said I can ‘always say no’ to ye. I’m saying it now. Cannae let you go, hen,” he repeats.
“Johnny,” you echo, strained as you attempt to wiggle out of his hold. You try to keep your voice strong and even but it’s becoming more and more difficult the longer you’re stuck in his hold.
He shushes you before you can continue talking, a massive palm covering your mouth. “Know ye want it too, pretty girl.” His large knee forces your legs apart, bumping it against your clothed center. You startle and he chubs up — your jump barely moving you in the strong grip of his arm. “Take such good care of me. Let me return the favor,” he murmurs, pupils blown out wide as he replaces his hand with his mouth.
You try to push him away again as he kisses you, but it’s no use. You’d have better luck tipping over a skyscraper with your bare hands. Defeated, you submit — not by kissing him back but no longer fighting him either.
“Tha’s it,” he coos when he decides to back away. He takes you with him, sliding your bottom across the desk and supporting your body weight until your legs are firmly underneath you. Suddenly you’re turning around and he’s forcing your face down to the cool wood. The action causes you to screech and he lays his body against yours and shushes your cries, smoothing a hand along the exposed skin of your cheek.
“S’alright, pretty girl. S’alright. Nobody’ll ever touch ye again. Safe with me, always.”
A shiver races down your spine. Johnny hums in delight, his hips crushed firmly to your ass. His thick length is pressed against you and he shudders. Impossibly, he pulls you by the waist against him even more and wraps a massive paw around your middle to tear your pants down your body. Your panties come with it and you can’t help the moan that escapes at the sensation and sudden coolness.
“Johnny…” you start again, knowing that kissing him is beyond innappropriate but fucking him on your desk is a different monster entirely.
A few thick digits in your mouth quiet you and you gargle at the sudden intrusion. “Shh, bonnie,” he pacifies you, before wrapping his arm around your front and swiping a long stripe up your core with his spit-moistened fingers.
He braces your squirming body down with his large forearm. You yelp as he continues to swirl around your sensitive nub, the motion getting his fingers wetter and wetter as your body responds to his touch. He continues his ministrations with deft and experienced fingers that have your legs trembling underneath you. Eyes closed, you cry out in pleasure — and then come back to reality when you realize you’re about to be fucked by your vulnerable head trauma patient.
“Johnny! We can’t do this,” you plead.
“Why no’ hen? We both want it.” You can’t see him with how you’re positioned but you just know he’s doing that little head tilt thing he does when he’s genuinely confused.
“It’s not right, I’ll lose my job,” you whisper.
He huffs. “Don’t need it. I’ll take care of ye.”
A bulky finger slides into you and your knees knock together. “You’re my patient,” you reply, breathless.
“Gonna help me at home from now on,” he responds effortlessly, stretching you with another finger, continuing his slow, lazy pumps.
Home?
“W… what do you mean by ‘home’, Johnny?” your psychiatrist brain asks, waiting for your patient to define his train of thought like you would in any other session. As if you were across the couch from one another — instead of his fingers spreading you wide as your body is splayed on your desk.
“Home,” he replies simply, like the word should explain itself. A third finger enters you and you suck in a breath at the slight burn. You whimper.
“Pretty baby,” he coos, accent thicker than you’ve ever heard it.
Your nipples pebble but you attempt to resist giving him anymore physical responses. “We can’t do this Johnny,” you tremble — from his fingers or the situation you currently find yourself in, you’re not sure.
“This beautiful body is telling me otherwise, Doc,” he practically purrs, his fingers picking up speed.
“Please Johnny… I…” you gasp.
He rips his hand out and you bite down hard on your cheek to prevent yourself from crying at the loss of contact.
“Want more, baby?!” he beams, the sound of his zipper your only warning before his thick, warm cock rubs lengthwise against the entrance to your cunt, hard length massaging your clit as he pumps.
‘No,’ your mind thinks, but your traitorous body says ‘yes, yes, yes,’ as you draw in a sharp breath, legs pushing your ass back without asking your brain.
Johnny makes a pleased grunt as he continues, lubing his cock with your wet, pulsing pussy. You can’t help it — you moan. A sharp slap on your ass pushes you further into the wood and Johnny soothes the sting by hitting your reddening cheek with his sticky cock a few times in a row.
His hand wraps around the back of your neck, keeping you in place but he’s surprisingly gentle. “Meant to be mine,” he declares as he enters you slowly. You suck in a large breath. “Only good thing that came outta this,” and you know he’s tapping the side of his head with his other hand without looking back at him. You whine and he groans when he enters you to the hilt, squeezing the flesh of your hip with the hand not securing your neck.
That’s it.
You’re fucked.
In more ways than one.
Johnny’s fingertips dig into your skin as he picks up the pace slightly. You grip the side of your desk, not bothering to stop him now. It’s too late for that. Arguments die on your tongue as Johnny pounds into you from behind, the bony protuberance of your pelvis hitting bruisingly against the hardwood with every thrust.
You resort to holding on as best you can as Johnny slams against you, like his anger is seeping out of his skin by doing it. The slapping of flesh and your combined pants sucking the air from the room. Johnny bucks into you until his pace gets sloppy and then he stills, pulling himself out with frustrated groan.
His hands leave you and you lay there, boneless, but watch as he drags your chair around the desk, cock bobbing and glistening in the light as he walks. He supports your weight effortlessly as he places you in your chair, like a delicate piece of china. He grunts as he drops to his knees in front of you, and you watch with hooded eyes as his arms come up underneath your knees and pull you to the edge of the seat — right to his waiting mouth.
Johnny swirls and curls his tongue around the sensitive flesh of your pussy, wrapping a strong arm across your lap to keep your bucking hips down. It stings a little, his solid arm pressing into the bruises forming on your hip. You pant and whine, unable to control the noises spilling out of you.
He doesn’t stop, licking and sucking until that little bundle of nerves can’t take it anymore. With all your strength you try to back away from his mouth but the effort is fruitless. Tears stream down your cheek, the sensitivity making you plead with him. “I can’t… Johnny please… please…”
He hums, the vibration sending a shockwave up your spinal column. He slows down but only slightly and you see stars, head floating as you cum on his tongue. He hums again and you shiver violently in reaction. Pulling back now, he smiles drunkenly at you and kisses your pussy before standing and lining himself back up with you.
Your legs are firmly secured and he throws your calves onto his broad shoulders. He teases your entrance before he lets out a sputtered groan. “Bonnie little thing,” he sighs before spearing you on his cock. You're contorted at an impossible angle, one you’re definitely going to feel later, as Johnny relentlessly drives himself into you.
Voice cracking, you can’t stop the sounds of pleasure that escape from between your lips. Sweat drips down Johnny’s brow as he concentrates. One of your hands grips the arm of your chair and the other finds your lower stomach, feeling Johnny’s cock push into you. The thick hair covering his muscular body tickles but it’s barely noticeable over the pleasure coursing through your system.
Your toes curl as another orgasm rips through you, and you bite down hard on the forearm braced beside your head. Johnny whines in pleasure, hips stuttering before resuming their normal brutal rhythm.
“‘M close, bonnie,” he pants. His motions become more flustered as he approaches his climax. The hand gripping onto the arm of your chair now curls around his forearm as you hold tight to him.
He releases, his spend coating your walls in thick spurts and he drops his body on top of yours. You can feel him twitching inside of you as you wrap your arms around his shoulders.
After a few moments, Johnny catches his breath and snakes his arms under you. He lifts you out of the chair and brings you to the couch he’s sat on countless times before, letting your limp form curl against his. He pets your head lovingly as you lay against him, humming softly to himself.
When you fall asleep, Johnny whispers his plans of the future to you. The house he’d purchased in the Highlands a couple of weeks ago is ready to move into. You won’t have to worry your pretty little head about a thing. The plane is chartered, and you’ll both be on it. He’ll be able to last longer next time, and you’re going to give him the most beautiful family — together you’ve already started to.
#call of duty#cod x reader#johnny soap mctavish x reader#johnny mactavish x reader#johnny mactavish#soap x y/n#johnny soap mactavish x you#soap x you#soap x reader#john soap mactavish#soap cod#john mactavish x you#john mactavish x reader#john mactavish
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(Thunderbolts) I feel like it would be really funny. There's a x reader where Bucky had a wife, and she just walks in during one of their meetings, holding their kids and like "where the hell were you? All I need a frozen pizza and some diaper wipes."
And alexie teaches one of the kids their first word but it's not mama or dada. It's Gin.
Bucky is pulled away quickly for a mission, leaving you holding the babies...and worrying about your husband.
Warnings: 18+ for language, domestic fluff, Thunderbolts!Bucky before the film, Dad!Bucky, reader likes pineapple on her pizza, I feel this is something I need to warn for. I don't really write kids in fics normally and I've never written Alexi before so…please be kind! Rated F for fluff and K for kids.
A/N: thank you so much for this request! Not going to lie I'm nervous writing anything about Thunderbolts before it's out but Thunderbolts!Bucky does live rent free in my head. It's not exactly as you requested but I hope you still enjoy it anyway!
Padruga - female friend in Russian
Divider by @firefly-graphics & @saradika-graphics
Masterlist | Bucky Barnes
Being married to Bucky Barnes was everything you'd dreamed about since the first time he'd strolled into your boutique and nervously asked if you had any gifts suitable for ex-assassins with limited wardrobes.
After a few hours searching for items he'd bought a new jacket for himself, black leather of course, and a smaller woman's jacket. Your heart had sunk, of course there was a woman already in his life. Tall, handsome, a rakish mop of hair flopping into his piercing blue eyes, she was a lucky lady.
Bucky had looked at you, those blue eyes looking straight into your soul, "it's for my sister, sort of, well, she's not my real sister, but she's like a - it's not for …I don't have a girlfriend."
"Oh, good." And then you kicked yourself for sounding so stupid. Bucky had given you the widest smile and written his number on a scrap of paper.
"Call me." He'd winked.
It was becoming harder to appreciate your luck when you were covered in bath water, probably the only shower you were likely to get unless Grant went to sleep quickly.
Bucky had been called out to an emergency meeting on his way to the store and as much as you loved his dedication and hard work you really, really, needed him to come home with the groceries.
You were running low on literally everything and you knew eventually you'd have to do a full shop, but now just the essentials would do. You couldn't have a repeat of lunch, hunting down some crackers, cheese and cucumbers sticks.
Distracted for a moment, Grant lined his rubber ducks up on the edge of the tub, splashing them in one by one.
"Look Mama!" He said, gleefully, "'dis one is Daddy!" He took the duck, left wing coloured in black, and made it dive into the heap of bubbles surrounding him.
"Well done, Sweetie!" You cooed, turning away quickly to hide a yawn and checking your phone.
Get your ass home or I'm ordering the pizza in instead
From the nice place
Get me some fries?
No
and I'm getting pineapple
Doll cmon now youre being cruel
It wasn't unusual for Bucky to keep his work secret, but he would normally be able to say when he was coming home. Perhaps it was really important.
Grant had just gone to sleep when the doorbell rang and you cringed, setting your pineapple heavy pizza down on the coffee table and pausing your movie.
There was a familiar silhouette in the frosted glass -
"Alexi, is everything okay?" The door swang wide open before you could even reach it. It had definitely been locked, but it was hard to keep any of the team out for long.
"Padruga! I am returning the small one." A very familiar mop of hair popped over Alexi's shoulder, face covered in cookie crumbs. For all that Grant was like you, Natalia was all Bucky, soft curls and sparkling blue eyes.
"Mommy!" She jumped from Alexi, landing heavily in your arms, "we went to Dairy Queen and I had two ice creams and one of those ice creams was vanilla and the other was choca-chol-choco-brown-extreme-blizzard-extreme."
You turned a cold eye on Alexi, "I thought we said park, dinner, home?"
"Ah how can I resist to spoiling the daughter of the Winter Soldier, if she wants extreme blizzard milk drinks I cannot say no." He shrugged, an indulgent smile peaking out of his beared.
"God," you rubbed a hand over your face. "She'll never sleep - Petal, can you go and get your pjs on please, I'll come up and help you do your teeth."
Natalia climbed the stairs quickly, sounding more like a herd of elephants than a four year old.
"Do you know what's going on with Bucky? I expected him home by now."
Alexi looked concerned, but didn't immediately start a tirade about the strength of the Winter Solider, so you felt reassured it couldn't be too serious.
"He is discussing planning with Wilson and his comrades. I have advised against it but he trusts the Captain and so we do too."
"We?"
"Yelena has been very helpful and is talking to the rest of the team. We will have a plan soon."
"So you're heading out for something?"
"Yes. I am sorry."
"Fuck."
"In Russian you can say, yebat, Mommy." Natalia's little voice floated over from the hallway and you cringed. Everytime she came back from spending time with Alexi or Yelena she seemed to have learnt a new Russian word, which wouldn't bother you, except they were almost always curse words.
"I'm all for her being bilingual, but could you maybe teach her how to say her favourite colour or something." You grouched.
"Sorry."
Alexi took a slice of pizza and left the address of the current discussions on a scrap of paper stuck to the fridge before vanishing in to the night again with the promise that you could "call anytime."
It had been two days since Bucky left on his bike to, "have a quick chat with the team, baby, don't worry, I'll swing by the store on the way home." And you were starting to move from slightly annoyed to a see-saw of furious and anxious.
He'd text a few times to let you know they hadn't left yet but the situation was complex, he'd be home very briefly before they left, just to see you and the kids, but other than that he was holed away for the foreseeable.
One week after Bucky left and you were truly stir crazy. There was only so many times you could have the same conversation with the other parents at the park before you lost your mind.
You really didn't care if Timmy or Charlie or whoever had cut their first tooth. All you cared about was what your husband was doing somewhere, anywhere, and when he'd be home safe in your arms.
It was 2am when the call came in, he was home, safe and unharmed, at the abandoned airstrip twenty miles past the town border. Yelena and Alexi were with him, also safe.
Grant was a heavy, floppy, weight in your arms as you buckled him into his car seat. But Natalia was wide awake and excited, clutching her bear to her chest and staring at the street lights in awe.
"I can't wait to see Daddy," she sighed, snuggling the top of the bear's head. You made sure to put his cologne on it, every day, while she was out at kindergarten, the same way you sprayed his pillow. So you'd both have a memory. Grant's blankie was the same and, still asleep, he pressed his chubby cheek into the cotton.
"I can't wait either, Petal, we'll be there soon."
You drove through the night, the darkness closing in around your car, streetlamps dwindling and stars appearing as you made it out of the town and towards the airstrip. There was a single plane looking almost abandoned, its tail at an angle, on the landing strip. But there was the faint glow of artificial light under the door of a metal supply shed beyond it.
You slowed the car, expecting there to be someone at the gate to the airstrip before remembering it had been closed a few years previously and there would be no one to care. It must have been a rough mission, to come back like this rather than through a real airport. It was normally Sam who let you know about his return and you could collect him from the big airport in the city or he'd appear in the night from some taxi or hire car.
You double checked to make sure the doors were locked on the car, the children dozing in the back. Grant was drooling on his blankie and Natalia, despite her assertion that she would "definitely certainly mostly stay awake until Daddy, Mommy" was bumping her head on the side of her car seat every time her eyes closed.
You stopped the car opposite the shed and flashed your lights, ready to drive off if they didn't flash back.
It went dark, then light, dark…light and the door opened. You put the handbrake on and jumped from the car, leaving the door flung open in your haste, and raced towards Bucky.
He dropped his duffle bag and swung you into his arms, latching around your waist and lifting you easily. His lips were chapped and there was the tang of blood when you pulled away from a cut on his upper lip. You cupped his face in your hands and inspected him as best you could in just the headlights.
"You're okay." You sighed, breathing him in, burying your face in his neck and squeezing your legs around his waist.
"I'm alright Doll, don't worry about me. Are you okay?" His voice was rough with sleep, his cheeks chapped with cold and he smelt faintly of fire which was disconcerting. But he was here, safe, holding you close.
"Glad you're back, baby." You smiled, kissing him again. It was amazing, even after all these years, ever though he'd been on a hundred missions. It still gave you butterflies every time he came back, not just that he returned at all, but that he came back to you.
Behind you came the sound of little fists banging on the windows.
"Daddy!" Natalia shouted and Bucky carried you, giggling, back to the car.
With practiced ease he unbuckled both children and held them close.
"My little monsters, have you been good for Mommy?"
"Yes!"
"No!" Grant giggled.
"Sounds about right." Bucky looked over Natalia's head and smiled again, soft and slow.
"I'm glad you're back." You repeated, "but if you ever take two weeks to 'pop to the store' again we're over." You wagged your finger teasingly.
"Don't worry, I got everything we needed." Bucky carried the children back to his duffle, shuffling them around so he could lumber back with everything in his arms. "Look in there."
You unzipped the bag and inside - a pack of wipes, a bottle of laundry soap and two frozen pizzas.
#Bucky Barnes#bucky barnes x reader#bucky x reader#bucky x you#bucky fanfic#bucky x y/n#bucky barnes/reader#Bucky Barnes x female!Reader#Bucky Barnes/female reader#bucky x female reader#Bucky fluff#bucky#Dad!Bucky#domestic fluff#Domestic Bucky
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between comfort & chaos || j.m
part 2 to baby, no attachment
your feet hurriedly moved away from the scene, breathing heavily as your head continued to repeat at how "cool" he had pretended to be in front of his friends. that was not the jj you have become so familiar with, not the one you've held, certainly not the one you shared intimacy with.
not getting so far, you hear his voice behind you. it was desperate and it cracks through the noise of this bonfire. "y/n! please, wait!" jj yelled, attempting to reach you.
you didn't turn around, continued to walk away as you couldn't trust yourself to stop. you didn't trust yourself enough to look at him, to hear what reason he throws your way now.
"y/n!" his footsteps now pounded against the sand, faster of pace and is inching closer towards you. jj's calloused hands brushed against your arm, shrugging him off as you forced yourself to keep moving
"leave me alone, jj." you spoke, cold and steady, even though your chest found it hard to breathe.
"just- please, let me explain!" he pleads, cutting in front of your path as he stepped toward you. his face was flushed, his blond hair messy from the salt air, and his blue eyes were now filled with something similar to regret.
you crossed your arms, scoffing at him as you refused to meet his gaze. "explain what, jj? how i'm just a girl you talk to 'sometimes?' you said it perfectly clear there is nothing between us." you shook your head, your tone sharp. "i don't need to hear it, jj."
he winced at your words like they hurt him physically, and for a moment, he stood there as his gaze flitted from you and across the ocean as he figured out how to fix something he didn't know how to fix.
"i-i didn't mean that, y/n." he said quietly, his voice rough.
"sure sounded like you did," you scoffed, finally meeting his gaze. "you didn't even hesitate, jj. you said it like... it was the easiest thing in the world!"
his hands came up to run through his hair, a telltale sign of his frustration. "i'm a coward, okay?" he blurts out. "i...i panicked. i didn't know what to say and u screwed up. but, y/n, i didn't mean it. i never meant it."
you stood there, arms cross and unmoving.
"you think you don't mean anything to me? i care about you so much. i can't... i can't stop thinking about you. can't stop wanting you. but i'm terrified! i have nothing, y/n. you deserve more than this, more than me." he spoke, his voice cracked and he was desperate.
the raw honesty in his voice made your anger falter, you stared at him. caught between the chaos of wanting to believe him, or to protect yourself from more heartbreak
"then why would you say that?" you spoke quietly, afraid how your voice could betray you if you spoke a little louder.
"i'm scared, y/n." he admitted, his blue eyes piercing into yours. "we... we come from different families, i'm afraid that you'll realize that i have nothing, and that i screw everything up and you'll leave me for good."
your heart clenched, and for a moment, the world seemed to hold its breath.
"you think i care about that, jj!" you cried out, your voice cracking. "if this—" you gestured between the two of you, "—was real, you would know i don't care about what 'you have' or 'don't have'."
"it is real!" he said, his voice breaking. "i'm sorry, but you have to understand. i can't give you anything half as good as the life you live right now."
you sigh, looking down and pinching the bridge of your nose.
"you know i don't give a fuck. all i wanted was you, jj. and to hear you act like we were nothing, it hurts." you admit, a frown on your face. the tears you'd been holding back has spilled over.
his eyes look guilty as he noticed your tears, he immediately closes the distance and pulls you into a into his arms, a comforting hug as he rubbed along your back.
"please... i'll make it up to you, just don't leave."
you stayed in his arms for a moment, before pulling away. "jj..." you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper. you pulled back, just enough to see his face. his eyes were red-rimmed, his lips trembling slightly. "you can't keep doing this—pushing me away, then you ask me to stay. it's confusing, and it hurts."
"i know" he said, his voice thick with guilt. "i don't want to hurt you, princess. it's just... i've never had something this real, and i'm so damn scared of losing it i didn't stop to think that i might have."
"then stop." you spoke softly, looking into his eyes and searching for the raw truth. "if you care about me as much as you say you do, then let me in. stop letting your fears win."
he nods adamantly, "i will, i swear. i won't push you away, i'm trying."
you sighed, your heart aching but hopeful. you took his hand in your own. "but if we're doing this, it's all in. no half-measures—that is what i don't deserve."
he squeezes your hand, nodding as he whispers a soft yes.
"i'm all in, i promise."
── .✦ ᝰ.ᐟ
tag req! @voidangxls
#jj maybank x routledge!reader#jj maybank x pogue!reader#obx#jj maybank#jj x reader#obx cast#obx fanfiction#obx fic#outer banks x you#jj maybank x reader#outer banks#outer banks fanfiction#s4 obx#obx season 4#rafe obx#obx x reader#obx4#obx spoilers#jj obx#jj maybank x kook!reader#jj maybank x oc#jj maybank x y/n#jj maybank x you#jj maybank fic#jj maybank imagine#outer banks x y/n#outerbanks rafe#rafe outer banks#outer banks imagine#outer banks x reader
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Mavis made his way through the sea of people to get to his locker. No one spoke to him. No one paid any attention to him. He didn’t mind this, actually. It allowed him to pass through undetected like a ninja. It was a perk of being one of the quiet kids. Although, sometimes, he wished he had more than just four people to talk to.
He spotted Carter through the crowd and gave him a quick “Hey!”. He waved back in response, smiling at him.
Compared to Mavis' drab appearance, looking like he just got out of bed, Carter’s hair was combed back in a neat fashion, his eyes sparkling like he just got a good night’s sleep. His attire consisted of a black shirt, blue jeans and a red flannel jacket. He was a bit of an anomaly at school. Most girls talked to him, but he had never gone out on a date with them. He was popular, but he was always seen talking with Mavis. People had asked him to hang out with people of his social status, but he always turned it down. “I don’t want to leave my friend alone, you know?”
Carter grew concerned when he saw that Mavis' eyes were droopy. “You okay?”
“Oh yeah. I just didn’t get enough sleep last night.” He answered, rubbing his eyes.
“Oh… Did you…” He lowered his voice to a whisper. “Dream about it again?”
Mavis let out a shaky sigh. “Yeah. I thought I got past that. I thought it had gone away in middle school.”
“Listen, if you need to talk, I can come over and we can. Or if you don’t want to, we can just talk about whatever. I’m fine with anything.”
Mavis smiled. Whenever he was around, his mood would improve a bit. They had both been friends since they were kids and they bonded over their family struggles. With Mavis' family, his parent’s feuds that constantly aggravated him. With Carter’s family, his mother having medical problems. He remembered the day of a particularly nasty fight where Mavis' mom and dad got into a screaming match. He had gone to Carter's house, crying, wondering if his parents didn’t love him anymore. “Is it my fault?” He asked him in tears. “Is it my fault mommy and daddy are constantly arguing? Weren't they supposed to love each other?"
Carter was quick to rescue him, offering a shoulder for him to cry on, reassuring him that his parents still love him. For the rest of the day, they played some of his favorite video games, played hide and seek outside with Mavis hiding in the shed, and even let him play with some of his action figures. Even though he felt uncomfortable about barging into his house unannounced, the fact that his friend was there for him in his time of need made it all worth it.
Mavis and Carter both got their textbooks out of their respective lockers and were about to walk to their classes when they heard a familiar voice.
“Hey guys! You lookin’ pretty snazzy today!”
They both turned to look at the source and their smiles widened. There they are. Tyler Lechner and Gavin Ozpin. They were both seen as the punk kids in school, always getting into trouble with school faculty. That was definitely why Charlie hung out with them. Tyler had a hoodie that had the logo of a rock band on it while Gavin was all decked out in his scene kid gear - ripped, black jeans and a ripped, denim jacket. He had multiple piercings in his ears and one of his eyebrows had a shaven mark on one side. He even got himself a tongue piercing which Mavis couldn’t help but cringe at. He remembered how he reacted the first time he saw Gavin's new look.
“Whoa! Dude, you look... Different. What'd you do?” He had asked him on their first day of sophomore year.
“Well, Charlie and Ty took me to a few places. We thought it would, y’know, change our status quo a bit.” He fluffed up his hair. “Gave me some curls too.”
“What status quo?” Carter asked.
“Uhhh….”
Tyler stepped in. “He just wanted to look different this year.”
“So, spent another boring night without internet?” Gavin asked, leaning against the lockers.
“Actually, it’s pretty beneficial. It allowed me to catch up on some reading.” Carter said.
“Pfft! Who has time to read anyway? There could be so many other things we could be doing. So many TV shows we could be watching. But thanks to the mayor’s bone-headed decision, our rights are slowly being taken away!”
“Gavin, you know there’s a reason behind the curfew and electronics rule.” Tyler said.
“Yeah, yeah. It’s because they’re trying to keep us safe from the mimics. But I mean, they didn’t have to say that we can’t use our cell phones after 9, right?” He waggled his cell phone. “I mean, I doubt someone’s face could appear on something like this and kill you.”
"I mean, it could be possible considering what they can do."
“Well, it’s best to be safe and follow the rules. You don’t want to get fined again, do you, Gav?” Mavis asked.
“No…”
“Good.”
They changed the conversation to something more suited for the morning. The point Gavin made about the cell phone restriction made Mavis think… There hadn’t been any reports of mimics coming through phones as of yet. Now that he thought about it, there wasn’t really a good reason for this rule. Maybe the mayor caved in after several paranoid calls from parents. Something about their children being influenced by Satan or the mimics. Business as usual in Crestwood county.
Other than that, life resumed as usual for the teens. Tyler and Gavin were talking about who knows what while him and Carter started quizzing each other to prepare for Mr. Bentley’s test.
"Hey Tyler? Where's Charlie?" Gavin asked.
"She's probably hanging out with her gal-pals. She always want to keep up the bad girl attitude." Tyler responded.
"Hmm."
Although he said that, they already knew who Charlie was.
Project Mimicry (Vol 1) - Chapter 1
"In the beginning, God created the heaven and the Earth." - Genesis 1:1
1983
"This is a test. This station is conducting a test of the Emergency Broadcasting System. This is only a test."
A long, screeching noise blared from the old TV. The Markson family had a different program on when they announced the test. It was some cowboy show their dad loved so much. For eleven year old Jade, it made her stomach churn. It was an odd sound, different from the sounds of horses and gunfire that came from the living room while they were doing family worship. It made her want to jump into her mother's arms and pray to Jehovah for the noise to stop.
Her mom, dad and brother were silent as the attention signal droned on. After a minute, it stopped.
"This is a test of the emergency broadcasting system. The broadcasters of your area in voluntary cooperation with federal, state and local authorities have developed this system to keep you informed in the event of an emergency. If this had been an actual emergency, the attention signal you have just heard would have been filed by official information, news or instructions. This station serves the northern Alabama area. This concludes this test of the emergency broadcast system."
Jade fiddled with the pages of her book, trying to think of the right words to say. Her brother, Caleb had resumed work on his drawing, seeming to not care about anything. Her mother let out a small sigh. "I swear, can they not scare the kids like that?"
"Mom..." Jade quietly said. "Why do they send out something like this? What if it hadn't been a test? Are... Are we gonna die?"
Opal got up from her chair and pulled her into her arms. "Oh sweetie, we're not gonna die. Everything's gonna be okay. This whole thing will blow over in no time."
"Well Jade," Opal's husband, Simon, chimed in. "They played the test on our TV because they want to inform us on what's happening. The world is at a very turbulent time at the moment so they are doing their best to keep us informed. If we were actually under attack, we would've been hiding in the basement." He let out a small chuckle.
"Well, what can we do to make it better?" Jade asked.
"Pray to Jehovah, of course. Our safety is his priority and if we pray to him, he'll protect us."
Jade smiled and snuggled into her mother. Jehovah is the only thing she knew. She may not be like the other "worldly" kids, but she didn't need all those material goods. She didn't need to see the latest movie or buy the newest toys. As long as she had her family and Jehovah, she can get through anything.
Caleb let out a soft coo.
"Oh, we didn't forget about you!" Simon lifted him out of his baby chair and gently rocked him. The whole family began to giggle.
This was their life. This was their routine. Jade was determined to be a good older sister to Caleb. And soon, he will be baptized.
-------
December 24th, 1983
"This is an important message from the Crestwood police department. This is not a test. I repeat, this is not a test. The Crestwood police department has issued a Shelter-in-place Warning for the county of Crestwood until further notice. Reports of unknown figures have been confirmed by law enforcement and the Department of Babylonian Crusaders. For your safety, until 5 PM to 6 AM, stay home, lock all doors and windows and, in the event of a break-in, have access to a loaded weapon at all times. Do not call 911 unless you need to report an emergency. The Crestwood police department and the Department of Babylonian Crusaders thanks you for your cooperation.
Stay tuned for a message from the representative of the Department of Babylonian Crusaders."
"Hello. My name is Dr. Lloyd Evans from the Department of Babylonian Crusaders. We have been receiving reports of unknown organisms that we've decided to call mimics. You may have already gotten the alert from the EBS about this phenomenon, but we're here to tell you about what those mimic types are and what you can do to protect yourself.
The first type are the defensive mimics. They are a sub group of mimics that take on the role of a protector when they find a human. Some pose as aggressive mimics to ward off other humans or they deceive humans they perceive as harmful with their harmless look and kill them. Think of it as a predator camouflaging itself in order for them to eat their prey.
There are three types of defensive mimics. There are Batesian, Mullerian and Emsleyan or Mertensian mimics.
Batesian mimics are harmless. They pose as a harmful mimic to ward off anyone they tries to hurt them or their human.
Mullerian mimics are two or more mimics that advertise themselves as harmful to ward off predators. These mimics often work in groups of two or three.
Emsleyan or Mertensian mimics take the form of a less harmful mimic to deceive the predator and kill them.
These ones can be considered safe, but you should still be wary of them. Aggressive mimics are the ones you need to watch out for. Now, aggressive mimics are the type of mimic that pose as humans to kill them. These types use mind games to toy with their victims. If they haven't committed suicide, the mimic will finish the job.
Predators are a mimic group where they take the form of a loved one, deceive them into thinking they are the real person and then use psychological manipulation. Those are the most dangerous types of mimics and we strongly advise to avoid them at all costs.
Parasites are [REDACTED DUE TO SIGNAL GLITCH]
Now, here's what you can do to keep yourself safe. Stay in your homes after 6 PM, lock all windows and doors and keep a loaded weapon with you at all times. In the event of a mimic attack, follow the S.A.F.E. principle.
S - Secure yourself in a room.
A - Access the situation. Learn how the mimic operates.
F - Fire your weapon. If the mimic attacks, do not hesitate. It can mean life or death.
E - If possible, escape. Do not let them win.
We hope this message keeps you safe. We're very sorry for the interruption and we hope you have a Merry Christmas!"
Though this message was broadcasted to most TVs, some of them reported the S part saying something different. According to reports, it said "Surrender yourself to the Lord."
--------
1987
The young man's back was pressed up against the wall. The shotgun he had in his hands had one shell left. The creature that was at his door kept calling out to him in a mockery of his wife's voice.
"Ralphie... Please let me in... I'm sorry for sca-a-a-aring you back there. You know how I am."
His grip tightened. That wasn't her. That wasn't his wife. She was dead. And now, he was going to die too. His eyes started to fill with tears.
Marla... I'm so sorry... I couldn't protect you... I couldn't save you from these things.
The image of his wife sprawled out on the kitchen floor flashed in his mind. Her neck that was gushing blood... He swallowed, trying to hold back his vomit. They had followed the rules. They had done everything the broadcast said. What did they do wrong? They had to have done something wrong for something like this to happen.
He gritted his teeth. Pondering over this won't help him now. Remember the S.A.F.E. principle, Ralph. Remember.
He secured himself in his bedroom, grabbing his shotgun so he could protect himself. He analyzed the situation. The creature, the mimic, was trying to use his wife's voice to lure him out, using his nickname. Ralphie was what she would call him when he came home from work. The way she said it made his heart soar. However, when it said his nickname, it felt like nails on a chalkboard.
The high school sweethearts had moved into the rural Alabama town after they had gotten married in New York. They thought getting away from the bustling city life would help them. They were in the talks of starting a family when the broadcast came on, talking about reports of mimics.
"Talk about bad timing. On Christmas too." Marla had said while bringing out the cookies and milk. "Let's hope Santa gets there okay."
"I hope so too. But hey, look on the bright side. This lockdown will end at 6 AM tomorrow. We've still got time to celebrate, right?"
"Yeah, I guess you're right. Besides, anything's fun with you." She gave him a light peck on the cheek.
A low sob escaped him. There was so much they wanted to do together. So many things they had planned. Their entire life... They were now gone.
Oh Marla... Why did they have to take you? What did we do?
God, please... Please help me.
He wiped his face. No, crying and pleading to some higher being isn't gonna solve anything. I have to survive. I have to live on for Marla! If I can get out of here, I could alert the police.
With a sense of courage taking over, he pointed his shotgun at the door. The mimic had begun to claw at the door, no doubt leaving scratch marks in the wood. "Ralphie... Please... Let me in. It's so cold. My neck hurts. Help..."
"Shut up... You're not her..."
The doorknob rattled.
"You're not her. You're not her! You're not her!!"
There was a sudden loud banging making him jump. "Ralph, open the goddamn door! You'd really leave me out here with these things?! How could you?!" The thing screeched.
"You're! Not! Her! Leave me alone!! You killed her, you monster!! You're not- You're not her!" He screamed, tears streaming down his face. "Just try and get me! I dare you! I'll fucking shoot you if you try anything!"
"Ralph..." His 'wife' had begun to cry. Normally, it would cause him to go over and hug her, but he will not be swayed. What it was doing, it was disgusting. It's desecrating his wife's memory, his image, his everything. The nerve of the creature...
The door flew open, allowing Ralph to see the monster. Though it was hard to see through the darkness, what he could see made him freeze.
Its form was tall and lanky, its arms and legs stretched out to an almost inhuman degree. What little hair it had on its head was beginning to fall off. Its skin was beginning to sag. Ralph could swear he was beginning to see bones. The mimic looked at him with empty eyes yet it pierced his soul with an intense glare. It opened its mouth to speak, but all that came out were rasps and gargles.
Ralph began to shake, his aim wavering as he stared at... He didn't even know what he was seeing. It was human, but at the same time, it was not. It looked like his wife, but it was like looking at a decomposing carcass. The smell... It smelled like rotten eggs left out on the hot sidewalk. Bile threatened to come up his throat, but he held it in.
One shot. He had to make it count. If it failed...
The creature began to laugh. It was the kind of laugh that made you cringe. It was an ear-piercing, gurgling laugh that was like if you tried to imitate a toy clown on its last legs.
Ralph pressed his finger on the trigger. Taking a deep breath, he screamed out.
"I will not let you kill me!!"
The gun went off.
--------
2017
The group of kids stared at the small house as their two older brothers talked to the movers. The smallest one of the bunch hugged her teddy bear. Though leaving their home state of Florida didn't seem like a huge deal at first, Catherine still had her doubts. Sure, they were free from all the hurricanes, but they still had friends there. They still had people they could talk to.
But now, she and her brothers moved to a new town. There was no one she knew there. And there was... an abundance of churches. Lots and lots of churches.
@chibisrpblog
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Breathe. | Choi su-bong (Thanos) x Nam-gyu
Summary; Where Nam-gyu basically has a breakdown inside the bathroom followed by huge dysphoria and the person he least expects talks him through it all.
Info; Gender dysphoria, trans!Nam-gyu, it’s like one of my hcs pls don’t attack me, anxiety, panic attacks, mentions of death (avrg squid game behavior), drugs, mentions of blood, idiots in love, kissing, actually js fluff mixed w angst, Nam-gyu w sensory issues if you squint!!, self-harm but without necessarily cutting, suicidal thoughts, bathroom fight shit doesn’t happen for their sake, they’re both emotionally constipated, Thanos just being Thanos honestly, coming out of the closet, unbinding, bruises, cuddling, acceptance, probably ooc but again who cares, just tbh actual tooth rotting comfort for our boy<3
Notes; I think writing became sort of a hyperfixation.. it’s so bad I gen can’t sleep so here you go goobers! Also don’t attack me for the trans nam-gyu hc I js saw that man and I was like; ‘this one’s going to my big hcs list’..
Nam-gyu has been feeling shaken ever since they came back from that stupid mingle game, sure, he was high off his mind just like Thanos was but.. he wasn’t sure why he felt so shaken up. The blood tainted his once pristine white sneakers, making him grimace as he remembered the pools of blood on the floor.
Fidgeting with his anxiety ring, Nam-gyu bit the inside of his cheek as he pushed the bathroom door open. He could still very clearly hear the screams and shouts of the people dying outside, the cries piercing his soul. He cursed under his breath, leaning against the sinks.
It took him a bit to realize his hands were fucking shaking like hell. He brought a hand up to his hair to tug on it, feeling that desperate urge again. But he stopped, instead, he kept his gaze down on the sink as that same hand that was once meant for his hair turned the tap on.
He splashed cold water onto his face, once, twice, thrice. And then with the support of both hands, he looked at himself in the mirror, he still had fucking blood smudged on his face. His stomach churned, the back of his hand wiping the blood away, completely forgetting about the tap, rather, he just let the water keep running.
Nam-gyu couldn’t help but stare at himself in the mirror, had the drugs seriously worn off that quickly? No, he didn’t think so. Maybe the real problem was him, he hated feeling affected by that stupid fucking game.
But of course he was the problem, it wasn’t a surprise. From a problem to another, as quick as it came, his thoughts began scattering, his hand fidgeting with his ring viciously as he tried to will his body and mind to calm the fuck down.
Again, Nam-gyu looked at himself, really did. And he cringed at the sight, some of his hair was sticking to his face, he looked exhausted, which was no surprise. And then finally, his gaze focused on himself overall, most importantly, his features. He remembered Thanos, hell, he was so.. masculine.
It wasn’t only his personality, but his looks. Compared to how he looks, Nam-gyu looked horribly like a girl, something he despised to be or even think he would ever be. But in this moment, he just knows he looks like a girl.
Nam-gyu cursed under his breath as he ducked his head down, nimble fingers tightening around the sink as he tried to at least regulate his breathing, but he felt sick to his stomach. Not only because of that stupid round but because of himself.
The way he looked made him want to carve himself out, maybe get out of this skin somehow that seemed to trap him in a place where he felt like he was constantly going to lose his fucking mind.
He shivered, fuck, when had he gotten so cold? The feeling wasn’t exactly unwelcome, anything rather than this was.
He swallowed hard, feeling the itch on his skin. He got that whenever he was in moods like this, it’s as if his body knew he wanted to claw himself out of it, it was ironic.
Nam-gyu felt nothing short of pathetic, and yet he began itching his skin. He damned himself for not bringing a small knife with himself, it could have done wonders to what hems feeling right now.
The itching just intensifies, it begins to hurt. But it’s a welcome feeling of pain. His mind drags him to the lifeless corpses he could see through the slit on the door, eyes glazed and blood seeping out of them as the gunfire ceased.
Nam-gyu could feel his vision get blurry, slowly, reverently but surely. He bit down on his lip, the hand that wasn’t viciously scratching his arm as if to try to get himself out was clenched in a fist, his nails, albeit short, dug into his skin.
He was crying again, Nam-gyu hated feeling like this. Hell, he hated everything. He just desperately needed to get out, or maybe all he needed was a bullet in his brain, out there he was nothing and in here he was worse than nothing. Maybe he could steal a pill or two from Thanos to calm his nerves, but it didn’t feel ideal, especially when he became sober so quickly.
His mind felt hazy as he furiously scratched and dug his fingers and clawed at his skin in his arms, he couldn’t see because his eyes were so damn foggy. He couldn’t hear anything since the only thing he could hear was his heart beat thudding strongly in his ears, a sickening reminder he was still alive and would be inside this fuckass body.
He bit his lip to stifle what he guessed was a sob, his hands were shaking again, and Nam-gyu felt like he couldn’t fucking breathe. His chest felt heavy, too constricted to suck in too much breath, the exact amount he needed.
He winced as he moved, the pain finally seeping in. He remembered binding tightly before leaving to this place, so.. he probably hasn’t taken this stupid binder in three days straight, oh, Nam-gyu bet this would do a number on this situation.
A quiet sob left his lips as his legs wobbled, doubling over while one hand still held tightly onto the sink, the water still running. His legs felt like jelly as his hand went to his chest, this was pure fucking torture at its finest, even though this was his own fault.
The reason why he’s like this right now is because he isn’t a fucking boy, Nam-gyu gritted his teeth. He would be able to breathe properly if he was a boy, he wouldn’t need to bind his stupid chest if he wasn’t a boy, he wouldn’t need to cry himself to sleep or fight with internal transphobia if he was a boy, Nam-gyu was just playing a boy, he realized. Or maybe it was just his mind speaking.
He only panicked further when he couldn’t breathe properly anymore, he was practically wheezing. And he was alone in the damn bathroom.
But not for long, really. Because Thanos apparently couldn’t leave people fucking alone when they took too long. Thanos, as always walked in carelessly, not noticing the scene at first.
"Hey, Nam-su, you were taking forever, bro. What else could be better than talking to the great Thanos?" But the next moment, Thanos knew something was off. First of all, he didn’t get a reply, and second of all, he could hear quiet sobs.
His gaze darted around until it fell on a familiar bob, Nam-gyu was sunken to his knees, shaking. Visibly crying and wheezing for air, Thanos didn’t know how to react. He was never good at comforting people, and wasn’t the best with making them feel better through words.
And yet, either way, his feet unconsciously moved to Nam-gyu as he crouched down in front of him. The other man seemed too caught up in his panic to notice, so, gently, Thanos reached out very slowly and wrapped his hand around Nam-gyu’s wrist.
The eyes that met his own were all familiar, but also weren’t. Nam-gyu had a huge ego and was a huge goof, but now.. Thanos couldn’t help but frown as he saw the tears clinging to his eyes as they slipped down, collected on his chin and then fell. His gaze was wild, hell, almost even scared. Thanos was definitely sure this was the closest to frightened he’d ever see Nam-gyu get.
"Nam-gyu, hey, hey man look at me." Thanos said as he held the other’s chin, it was almost scary how he was shaking so badly. "You need to take a breather, you look like you might run out of breath." Thanos said, but it didn’t do anything. Goddamn it, Thanos hated not knowing what to do, hated feeling powerless.
"I c-" He heard Nam-gyu choke out, was he trying to say 'I can’t'? Thanos was worried as hell, he couldn’t understand shit while his friend was nearly out of fucking breath.
Nam-gyu’s hand clawed at his chest, as much as he felt scared to come out, which mingled with his whole anxiety, Nam-gyu felt like he was being tortured. And thankfully, Thanos got the hint. "Is it something wrong with your chest?" He asked as he saw how Nam-gyu seemed to try to get something out. So instead of questioning, he shut up and began taking the tracksuit jacket with the other’s number off. Then, his shirt.
Thanos could easily tell Nam-gyu was almost afraid of this, he was hesitant, tense, even. But if this was cutting off his air supply, Thanos would have to get whatever this dude was using or wearing off.
His lips parted in a small 'O' as he caught the sight of a chest binder, but he brushed it off, now wasn’t really the time to be shocked. "You need to get this off before you pass out or some shit." Thanos said, and Nam-gyu just nodded, feeling lightheaded already, sobbing hurt, trying to suck in a breath hurt like a bitch.
He turned around with his back to Thanos as he felt the other unclasp the binder, his hands were too shaky to work something out, and he felt instantly relieved, like a pressure in his chest was gone, but he still couldn’t properly breathe. But before he could ponder on it too much, Thanos was already speaking up.
"Try to match your breathing rhythm to mines, in and out very slowly." He finally said, and Nam-gyu complied. After what felt like five minutes, Nam-gyu finally had managed to breathe. Calming down as he let out a shuddering sigh, sniffling and wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. Great, now he had a headache and he felt pathetic.
He had forgotten about his binder, though. He was snapped out of it when Thanos began awkwardly talking; "You uh, really shouldn’t use that thing for too long. It was too tight, dumbass." The words didn’t have his usual bite to it, he seemed almost.. worried, as if he would be, Nam-gyu thought.
"What else would I wear, then, genius?" He snorted, actually caught off guard when he felt his shirt slip back on and the sound of a jacket unzipping. He turned around to see Thanos handing him his jacket, for some reason it was somewhat baggier than his own. Or maybe Thanos was just looking for an excuse for Nam-gyu to wear it. Either way, he was quick to put it on and zip it up. Maybe he was right, plus, Nam-gyu didn't want bruised ribs.. more than they already were. And his chest really wasn’t that hard to hide either way, Nam-gyu was just a bit paranoid over it, and binding felt more safe.
He sat down and leaned against the wall with his head tilted back, he felt exhausted, really. The silence became somewhat awkward with a tinge of comfort. "I’m not going to judge you, you know that, right?"
Nam-gyu paused, finally catching Thanos’ eyes. "You don’t have to lie if you find me a freak, I mean, hell I’d understand if you didn’t want a fake b—" Before the final words of the sentence could even tip off his tongue, Thanos shushed him.
"Do not say that, you hear me?" Thanos scoffed. "To me, you’re still the same crazy junkie who gets me, I’m not about to kick you out." Nam-gyu felt a weird flutter in his chest and maybe more weight being lifted off of his shoulders.
"I don’t see you any differently from how I used to." Thanos added, averting his gaze. "So, you’ll still give me the pills?" Nam-gyu added jokingly, but deep down he was being slightly serious, as much as he relied on Thanos, those pills kept him somewhat more sane to not hurt himself. "You never change, do you? I would call you a drug addict but I’m nowhere better."
Nam-gyu sniffled, ducking his head down as he let out a quiet smile before looking back up again, and then, their faces were a bit closer than he initially thought they were. And Thanos was looking at his lips. And then the next second, he felt his lips on his own.
They were slightly cracked, chapped against his own as he kissed him back, nothing too rough or demanding, it was pretty.. gentle. His lips felt sweet, and he found himself leaning into it, it was weirdly calming. Soothing to his soul in a way he didn’t quite dislike.
And yet, the moment was just ruined by a guard knocking on the door loudly declaring the lights would shut off soon. They both broke away, and Nam-gyu shoved his binder somewhere inside his pocket, ignoring how it appeared like a bundle inside of it and cleaned his face, following right behind Thanos who went in front.
As expected, most players were already in bed by the time they were there back, Nam-gyu really just felt the need to knock the fuck out, it felt like the only thing that would really calm his headache down.
As they walked towards their designed bunks, Nam-gyu held onto Thanos’ pinky finger, letting the other just lead him, really. He didn’t think much of it when Thanos finally lay down and motioned for him to do the same.
Nam-gyu lay next to Thanos with his back pressed to his chest, closing his eyes that were so heavy that he thought he might as well fall asleep standing up. He felt one arms around his waist, and one on his hair, deftly twirling a strand. It was easy to lull him to sleep, he was already pretty much exhausted anyways.
Maybe Thanos wasn’t the worse person in the world, in the end.
I wrote this while half asleep and while I did my biology work, srry for anything. Also I am not transgender so forgive me if I did anything wrong, I didn’t mean to be offensive in any way!! Anyway, enjoy<3
#thangyu#squid game thanos#player 124#player 230#nam gyu#choi su bong#thanos squid game#squid game season 2#124 x 230#thanos x nam gyu
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Huffily Ever After: A CindereLloyd Story [4/?]
Chapter Four - The Awards Gala Characters/Pairings: Lloyd Hansen x curvy Millennial Female!Reader Word Count: 6.5k Summary: A night of industry glitz and glam brings with it some encounters and revelations you didn't expect.
SERIES Content/Warnings: modern Cinderella adaptation, unknown identities, enemies to lovers, toxic coworkers, eventual smut CHAPTER WARNING: UNWANTED SEXUAL ADVANCES
Notes: The sixth offering in my Birthday Jubilee collection.
Previous Chapter | Series
↠ Main Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest
The dress Maggie had insisted on buying for you was nothing short of breathtaking - a floor-length gown with a fabric that shimmered subtly as you moved. The bodice hugged your curves perfectly before flowing into a graceful skirt with a discreet slit up one side. The neckline dipped low enough to be alluring without being scandalous, and delicate beading along the shoulders caught the light beautifully. You felt like a modern day princess.
Maggie had, of course, found a marvelous new dress for herself, as well.
Your mother's necklace, usually hidden beneath your clothes, now rested perfectly in the hollow of your throat, the delicate gold chain complementing the beadwork of the dress. It was a simple jewelry statement, but the dress brought enough elegant glitz that anything more might have been too much.
As the elevator doors slid open, your heart skipped a beat. There, leaning casually against the back wall, was Lloyd Hansen. His piercing blue eyes locked onto yours for a fraction of a second before you quickly averted your gaze. You hesitated for just a moment before stepping inside, deliberately choosing the opposite corner of the elevator.
The small space suddenly felt even more confined as a few other conference attendees filed in, creating a human barrier between you and Lloyd. You were grateful for their presence, giving you a perfectly acceptable excuse not to engage him in conversation at all. You kept your eyes fixed firmly on the illuminated floor numbers above the door as the lift descended.
The elegant fabric of your new gown rustled softly as you shifted your weight, hyperaware of every movement. The subtle scent of your perfume mingled with the various colognes and perfumes of the other passengers, creating an oddly intoxicating blend in the enclosed space.
You couldn't help but sneak a glance at Lloyd's reflection in the polished metal doors as you waited to be released in the lobby. He cut an impressive figure in a perfectly tailored black tuxedo, the crisp white shirt a stark contrast against his tanned skin. His hair was neatly slicked back, as was typical for him. The full look - even with his bold statement mustache - combined to give him an air of sophisticated elegance that was undeniably attractive.
If only he were more of a Prince Charming instead of a Prince Charming said with sarcasm, annoyance, and an eye roll.
You quickly averted your eyes when you realized Lloyd had caught you looking. A small smirk played at the corner of his mouth, and you felt a flush creeping up your neck. Thankfully, the elevator dinged, announcing your arrival at the lobby, and you rushed out quickly ahead of him and the others.
You spotted Maggie near a large potted palm, resplendent in her new emerald green gown. Her eyes lit up when she saw you, and she waved you over enthusiastically.
"Oh, darling, you look absolutely stunning!" Maggie exclaimed, giving you an appraising look. "That dress was made for you. We certainly chose well, didn't we?"
You smiled, feeling a mix of excitement and nerves. "Thank you again, Maggie. I still can't believe you insisted on getting it for me."
"Nonsense," Maggie said, “it’s fun playing fairy godmother.”
Your anticipation grew as you walked side by side with your mentor towards the grand ballroom, and it peaked as you entered the prestigious event. The room was awash in soft golden light, crystal chandeliers twinkling overhead. Tables draped in crisp white linens were adorned with elaborate floral centerpieces, and waiters in pristine uniforms glided between guests offering flutes of champagne.
"Deep breath," Maggie murmured, patting your arm reassuringly. "You belong here just as much as anyone else. This is PR - we’re all faking it. "
You nodded and grinned, grateful for her steadying presence. As you moved further into the room, you began to recognize faces from the conference - industry leaders, renowned academics, influential figures in the world of public relations and marketing, and even a few of the new friends and acquaintances you’d made over the past two days.
You wondered if your actual Prince Charming from the masquerade might be here… Though if he were, you really had no idea how you would recognize him. Versailles had been enchantingly but dimly lit - more so than this ballroom - and then your walk around the grounds and gardens had been even darker - with only occasional lamps and moonlight, but even if you’d had more proper lighting, your masked man had been wearing a full face mask. You had nothing to go off of but a general recollection of his height and build and the knowledge that he had a mustache - which you’d only felt and not seen as you’d been good and not peeked when he told you to close your eyes when he’d kissed you.
You could not go around kissing every man with a mustache here tonight.
But what would you do if you were ever face to face with him again anyway?
"Maggie!" a booming voice called out. You turned to see Claude Dumont approaching, his face eager with excitement. "And our rising star!”
He greeted each of you with the customary French double kiss.
You smiled warmly at Claude, feeling a resurgence of gratitude from the panel earlier. "Thank you again for the opportunity today, Claude. It was an incredible experience."
Claude waved his hand dismissively. "No need to thank me, my dear. You more than proved your worth up there. In fact," he leaned in conspiratorially, "I've had several people asking about you since the panel. You've made quite an impression."
You felt a flutter of excitement at his words. "Really? That's... wow. I'm honored."
"As you should be," Maggie chimed in, beaming with pride. "I told you she was something special, didn't I, Claude?"
Claude nodded enthusiastically. "Indeed you did, and as always, your judgment was impeccable." He turned back to you. "Now, the two of you simply must join us at the Hansen Global table tonight.”
As fond as you’d grown of Claude, you knew immediately that would put you at a table with Lloyd Hansen yet again and did not relish that possibility.
But Maggie was already eagerly accepting.
"Wonderful!" Claude exclaimed, clapping his hands together. "Let's head over, shall we? I believe they're about to start seating for dinner."
You tucked your reluctance away as you followed Claude and Maggie through the crowded ballroom. And as you did, you couldn’t help but feel a surge of pride. Just days ago, you never would have imagined being invited to sit at one of the most prestigious tables at this gala. Despite your misgivings about Lloyd, you knew this was an incredible opportunity.
You also noticed the way Claude gently placed his hand on Maggie’s back as he helped navigate through a particularly thick part of the crowd. You bit your lip to keep from smiling with too much giddiness. If there was something there for Maggie, you could endure sitting at a table with anyone tonight.
The Hansen Global table was centrally located, offering a perfect view of the stage where the awards would be presented later in the evening.
As you approached the table, your eyes immediately fell on the familiar figures of Victor Chen and Lloyd. Victor, looking dapper in a classic black tuxedo, stood up to greet you with a warm smile. Lloyd, on the other hand, remained seated, his piercing blue eyes following your every move as you drew near.
But it was the unfamiliar faces at the table that truly caught your attention. Seated on the opposite side of the round banquet table from Lloyd was a distinguished-looking man in his late sixties or early seventies. His silver hair was immaculately styled, and he exuded an air of quiet authority that immediately commanded respect. His features bore a striking resemblance to Lloyd's, though softened somewhat by age.
Claude gestured towards this man. "Allow me to introduce you to Robert Hansen, the founder and architect of Hansen Global."
Robert Hansen stood, his movements graceful and powerful, effectively erasing a decade off his age, and extended his hand to you with a warm smile. "It's a pleasure to meet you," he said, his voice rich and resonant. "I heard wonderful things about your panel performance earlier today."
You felt a flutter of nerves as you shook his hand, acutely aware that you were in the presence of one of the industry's most influential figures. "Thank you, Mr. Hansen. It's an honor to meet you."
Robert chuckled, his eyes twinkling. "Please, call me Robert. Any rising star Claude speaks so highly of is welcome at our table so long as you sit by me."
As you took your seat, you couldn't help but notice the stark contrast between Robert's welcoming demeanor and Lloyd's cool indifference. Lloyd barely acknowledged your presence as you sat down, his attention seemingly focused on his phone.
"So tell me," Robert said, turning to you with genuine interest in his eyes, "what inspired you to enter the world of public relations?"
"Well, I've always been fascinated by the power of story and how people latch onto narrative. I wanted to be an author, so I joined the lit mag for my college, and eventually was part of the marketing team. I took a marketing class to help me get better and realized marketing is storytelling. What really drew me in was the challenge of navigating complex narratives and helping an organization connect authentically with an audience. And a more guarantee-able paycheck than trying to strike out as an author."
Robert laughed - as anyone did when you added the quip in your story.
“I was too far into my undergrad to want to switch majors at that point, but it sent me on the path to grad school, and Maggie was one of my professors there.”
Robert nodded approvingly. "A good journey to root you in this business. Too often, people enter this field thinking it's all about spin and damage control. But true public relations is about building genuine relationships and trust."
Around the room, everyone else seemed to be taking their seats, and servers began bringing out the salad course. Robert continued speaking primarily with you, though in his command of the table, he drew others into the discussion at various points.
He shared anecdotes from his early days in the industry, offering insights into how the field had evolved over the decades. While remaining engaged in the conversation, you did keep stealing moments to observe Maggie and Claude sitting on your other side. They weren’t overt or showy, but it was plain to see there was more than what you had assumed was only a platonic interest there, and it made your heart swell.
By the time the main course arrived, you found yourself thoroughly enjoying Robert's company. His wealth of experience and sharp wit made for engaging conversation, and you were flattered by his genuine interest in your insights. Victor, who had proven to consistently be an engaging companion in conversation, was also eager to contribute to the flow, and smiled at you often.
"You know," Robert mused, swirling the wine in his glass, "it's refreshing to see someone so young with such a nuanced understanding of brand authenticity. In my day, we were often too focused on controlling the message rather than fostering genuine connections."
You nodded, feeling a mix of pride and humility at his praise. "I think social media has really changed the game in terms of transparency and authenticity. Brands can't hide behind carefully crafted press releases anymore."
His eyes flicked briefly towards Lloyd before returning to you. "But you, my dear, clearly understand the importance of adapting to our rapidly changing landscape."
Lloyd's jaw tightened almost imperceptibly at his father's words, but he remained silent, taking a long sip of his wine.
Robert continued, his voice carrying just enough to be heard by those nearby. "I've always believed that the key to success in this field is a combination of intuition and adaptability. The ability to read a room, to sense the undercurrents of public opinion before they surface. It's a rare talent, and one that can't be taught in any classroom."
You felt a flush of pride at Robert's words, but also a twinge of discomfort at the undercurrent of tension you sensed between him and Lloyd. "Thank you, sir. I still have a lot to learn, but I'm passionate about understanding the nuances of public perception and how it shapes brand narratives."
Robert's eyes twinkled. "Modesty is admirable, but don't sell yourself short. From what I've heard, you have quite the promising career ahead of you."
Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Lloyd's posture stiffen slightly. His gaze flickered between you and his father, a hint of something unreadable in his eyes.
At that moment, the emcee took to the stage, signaling the start of the awards ceremony. You settled back in your chair, grateful for the brief respite from the intensity of the conversation.
The emcee, a charismatic woman in a striking red gown, began announcing the various categories and winners. You found yourself genuinely interested in the accomplishments being celebrated, from innovative crisis management strategies to groundbreaking social media campaigns.
Throughout the ceremony, you found your gaze occasionally drifting to Lloyd. Despite his earlier coldness, you couldn't help but notice the way the soft lighting caught the angles of his face, highlighting his strong jaw and those piercing blue eyes. But what’s more, you couldn't help but wonder about the dynamic between him and his father. His gaze alternated between the stage and his phone, though you caught him glancing in your direction more than once. There was something in his expression - a tightness around his eyes, a slight clench in his jaw - that hinted at barely contained tension.
Robert continued to engage you in conversation during breaks between awards, his eyes twinkling with approval as you shared your thoughts and responded to his comments and questions.
When Hansen Global won an award for their crisis management work during a high-profile data breach, Robert stood to accept it. As he made his way to the stage, you couldn't help but notice the way Lloyd's shoulders tensed, his knuckles whitening around his glass of whiskey.
Robert's acceptance speech was gracious and eloquent, praising his team's hard work and innovation. As he spoke, you couldn't help but notice that he didn't once mention Lloyd by name, despite Lloyd being a key figure in the company.
When Robert returned to the table, he was met with a round of congratulations. Lloyd's smile seemed forced as he clinked glasses with his father, a gesture that felt more obligatory than celebratory.
As the night wore on, you found yourself increasingly aware of the undercurrent of tension between Lloyd and Robert. It was subtle - a continual tightness in Lloyd's jaw, a certain coolness in Robert's tone when addressing his son - but unmistakable to your trained eye.
During a lull in the ceremony, Robert turned to you once more. "You know," he said, his voice low and conspiratorial, "I’m so pleased you landed at our table tonight. I was so curious about whether the buzz around you could stand up to the hype, but I’m convinced you were the perfect choice to fill the spot when Leon fell ill. Claude was holding on to Lloyd here as a back up pick, but destiny intervened.”
Robert's words hung in the air, and you felt a sudden tension descend over the table. Lloyd's eyes flashed dangerously, his jaw clenching visibly.
"Father," Lloyd said, his voice low and tight with barely controlled anger. "Perhaps this isn't the time discussions like this."
Robert waved a dismissive hand. "Nonsense. We're all professionals here. And a rising star deserves to know just how impressive her performance was today."
You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, acutely aware of the brewing conflict. "That's very kind of you to say, Robert. But really, I was just excited for the opportunity. I learned so much."
Lloyd's eyes met yours for a brief moment, and you were startled by the intensity of emotion you saw there - a mixture of anger, frustration, and something else you couldn't quite decipher.
Robert cleared his throat, a flicker of something - regret? frustration? - crossing his face before he smoothed his expression back into a polite smile. "My apologies," he said, his voice low again, only for you - though you weren’t the one you felt might appreciate an apology. "Family dynamics can be... complicated in this business."
You nodded, unsure of how to respond. Victor quickly jumped in, steering the conversation to safer topics, and you gave him an appreciative smile.
As the awards ceremony drew to a close, you couldn't shake the feeling that you had inadvertently become a pawn in some long-standing family drama between Lloyd and his father.
The tension at the table had abated somewhat as everyone began to stand, preparing to move to the after-party. You glanced at Maggie, hoping to catch her eye and signal your desire to make a graceful exit. However, she was deep in conversation with Claude, their heads bent close together as they spoke in hushed tones.
Lloyd vanished so quickly, you didn’t even see him take leave of your party.
Quite a few guests from other tables were pressing closer to your group to speak to Robert, and you were unsure of whether to head to the second ballroom for the next portion of the evening or use the transition to leave.
Victor suddenly appeared at your elbow, a warm smile lighting up his handsome face. "Quite the eventful evening, wouldn't you say?" he said softly, his dark eyes twinkling with understanding.
You nodded, grateful for his steady presence. "That's certainly one way to put it," you replied with a small laugh.
Victor's smile widened, revealing perfect white teeth. "Listen," he said, leaning in slightly, "I know things got a bit... tense there for a moment. I always find it fascinating to observe the Hansen family dynamics, but I’ve never been the one in the crosshairs. But the night's not over yet, and it would be a shame for you to miss out on the best part of the evening."
You raised an eyebrow, intrigued. "Oh? And what might that be?"
Victor's eyes sparkled with excitement. "The dessert buffet and dancing, of course! It's standing tradition to end the awards gala with a grand finale of sweets and a big swanky band. Let me be your guide?”
You hesitated for a moment, but after all the tension, some lighthearted fun sounded perfect, and you knew conversation always seemed to flow easily with him.
"I'd love that," you replied with a genuine smile. "Lead the way!"
Victor offered his arm, and you took it, allowing him to guide you through the crowd towards the adjacent ballroom. As you walked, he leaned in close, his breath warm against your ear.
"I must say, you handled yourself admirably back there," he murmured. "Not many could navigate the Hansen family drama with such grace."
You smiled at Victor, grateful for his kind words. "I'm just glad I didn't make things worse," you admitted. "I felt like I was walking on eggshells there for a while."
“No, nothing close to that. You were effortlessly charming,” he said in a low tone that shot butterflies through your stomach. "Now this is more like it," he added in a lighter tone as you entered the second ballroom.
The space had been converted into a lavish dessert paradise, with elaborate displays of cakes, pastries, and confections artfully arranged on tiered stands and elegant tables. The live band was set up on a stage at one end of the room, already playing a jazzy tune that had several couples swaying on the dance floor.
"Shall we start with something sweet or take a sweep across the dance floor?" he asked.
You hesitated, torn between the allure of the desserts and the infectious energy of the music.
"Let's start with something sweet," you decided, eyeing the tempting array of desserts. "We can build up our energy for dancing."
Victor grinned, leading you towards a particularly enticing display of chocolate creations. "Excellent choice. I always say, life's too short to skip dessert."
As you perused the options, Victor kept up a steady stream of witty commentary, pointing out particularly intriguing confections and sharing amusing anecdotes about past galas. His easy charm and genuine warmth helped you relax, the tension from earlier in the evening slowly melting away.
Having each chosen a few bite-sized treats, Victor guided you toward a more quiet corner to enjoy your selections. As you savored a delicate chocolate mousse, you couldn't help but notice the way Victor's eyes lingered on you, his gaze warm and appreciative.
“You really do look stunning tonight," he said softly, his eyes meeting yours. "That dress is exquisite on you."
You felt a blush creep up your cheeks at his compliment. "Thank you," you replied, smoothing your hand over the shimmering fabric. "It was a bit of a splurge, but Maggie insisted."
Victor chuckled. "Well, remind me to thank Maggie later. She has impeccable taste."
One compliment was not a problem. But two and now three didn’t seem to keep things in the professional friendship area that you felt it should firmly stay in, especially since…
Hadn’t he been wearing a wedding band earlier today? Wasn’t he married? Maybe he had been divorced. But maybe he really only meant Maggie had impeccable taste. Because she did.
That was all this was. You were getting carried away - this man was not flirting with you.
“Didn’t you say I couldn’t miss the dancing tonight?” you asked a moment later.
Victor's eyes lit up at your suggestion. "Indeed I did. Shall we?" He offered his hand with a flourish.
You placed your hand in his, allowing him to lead you onto the dance floor. The band had just started a new song, a lively swing number that had couples twirling and laughing all around you.
Victor proved to be an excellent dancer, guiding you through the steps with confidence and grace. His hand on your waist was warm and steady, but nothing more than that, and you found yourself relaxing into the rhythm of the music.
As you spun and swayed to the music, you found yourself relaxing into the moment, your earlier concerns fading away. Victor's easy smile and gentle teasing kept you laughing, and you realized you were genuinely enjoying yourself.
You caught glimpses of familiar faces - Maggie and Claude swaying together near the edge of the crowd, Robert Hansen chatting animatedly with a group of industry bigwigs by the bar, Dr. Rossi, Aaron Lang, even your Nexus CEO and thankfully no Amilla.
But there was no sign of Lloyd either.
Not that you needed to care.
The song transitioned into a slower, more romantic melody.
Victor's hand on your waist seemed to tighten ever so slightly, and you worried he might try to pull you closer. Your mind raced, trying to figure out how to extricate yourself without causing a scene if he did.
But then a familiar voice carved through the music.
"Mind if I cut in?"
You turned to see Lloyd standing there, his expression unreadable. His blue eyes met yours, and for a moment, you forgot how to breathe.
Victor's smile tightened, but he stepped back with practiced grace. "Of course," he said smoothly, though you detected a hint of disdain in his voice. "I’ll find you again for the next dance." He gave your hand a gentle squeeze before releasing it and melting into the crowd.
Before you could protest, Lloyd had taken Victor's place, one hand on your waist and the other clasping yours. His touch was firm but not forceful, and you found yourself instinctively following his lead as he guided you into the dance.
"I hope I wasn’t interrupting anything," Lloyd said, his voice low and tinged with something you couldn't quite identify. Sarcasm? Concern?
You shook your head. "Not at all," you replied, trying to keep your tone neutral. "Victor was just being friendly."
Lloyd's eyebrow quirked slightly. "Friendly. Right."
You bristled at his implication. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Lloyd's eyes flickered over your shoulder, presumably to where Victor had disappeared into the crowd. "Nothing. Just be careful around him. His 'friendliness' has a tendency to blur professional lines."
You frowned, unsure how to respond. Part of you wanted to defend Victor, but you couldn't help but wonder if Lloyd's warning held some truth. You'd had your own doubts about Victor's intentions, after all.
Still, you didn’t need Lloyd of all people nosing in.
"I can take care of myself," you said finally, your voice firm.
Lloyd's eyes snapped back to yours, a hint of surprise in them. "I don't doubt that," he said, his voice softer than you expected. “Like I said, just be careful.”
He said nothing for a moment, guiding you through the steps of the slow dance with surprising grace. You were acutely aware of his hand on your waist, the warmth of his palm seeping through the fabric of your dress.
"I wanted to apologize," Lloyd said suddenly, his voice low and surprisingly sincere. "For earlier. My father can be challenging."
You blinked, caught off guard by his unexpected apology. "Oh. It's... it's alright. Family dynamics can be complicated."
A wry smile tugged at the corner of Lloyd's mouth. "That's certainly one way to put it." He paused, his blue eyes searching your face. "I hope it didn't make you uncomfortable. You shouldn’t be a pawn in his games.”
“Is that all I am?” you bristled. You had wanted to be more sympathetic, but his assertion that you were only a pawn irked at you.
Lloyd's eyes widened slightly, his grip on your waist tightening. "No," he said, his voice low and intense. "Christ, that's not what I meant."
You held his gaze, challenging him. "Then what did you mean?"
He sighed, a flicker of frustration crossing his face. "My father has a way of using people to make a point. Especially to me. He’s masterfully good at it. I didn't want you caught in the crossfire of our complicated relationship."
You softened slightly at his words, recognizing the genuine concern behind them. "I appreciate that," you said carefully. "But I'm not some delicate flower that needs protection. I can handle myself in difficult situations."
A ghost of a smile played at Lloyd's lips. "I'm beginning to see that," he murmured.
The two of you fell silent for a moment, swaying to the music.
As you moved together on the dance floor, you couldn't help but notice how effortlessly Lloyd led you through the steps. His movements were smooth and confident, a stark contrast to the tension you'd sensed from him earlier in the evening. The warmth of his hand on your waist and the gentle pressure of his fingers intertwined with yours sent an unexpected thrill through you.
"You're a good dancer," you said, breaking the silence.
Lloyd's lips quirked into a half-smile. "Years of practice. My mother insisted on ballroom lessons when I was younger."
You raised an eyebrow, intrigued by this glimpse into his past. "Really? I wouldn't have pegged you for the ballroom type."
He chuckled softly, the sound sending a shiver down your spine. "There's a lot you don't know about me."
Your eyes met his, and for a moment you had the wild thought that he could be your masked man. Your mind raced back to that conversation with him on the dance floor, his refusal to ask or answer boring questions, and so you’d gone for a bold punch.
“What's your biggest regret?”
“My biggest regret is not taking more risks when I was younger. The kind that make your heart race and your palms sweat. The kind that could change everything.”
One question, and you would know…
“What's your biggest regret?"
He stiffened, and your heart leapt.
That had to mean…
“Fuck,” he cursed, “asking you to dance five minutes ago.”
You laughed at his annoyed but light tone, but your heart sunk back down. It didn’t fall, because you didn’t want it to be Lloyd. You were just mildly disappointed, the prospect of discovering who he was delayed. Similar builds, they both could dance, and Lloyd certainly had a mustache, but that was it apparently.
“Not all of us had ballroom lessons, okay?”
“It’s what all the WASP-y moms make their kids do. Cotillion and all that bullshit.”
“On some level, I knew it was still something that happened, but you’re the first person I’ve ever heard firsthand knowledge of it from, so I did kind of think it was only something they put in tv and movies for the plot.”
He laughed. “I don’t know, pumpkin, maybe you’re part of my plot. Things can get pretty magical at a PR conference.”
His tone was absolutely rank with so much sarcasm that you couldn’t help but laugh as well.
"You look nice, by the way," he said. His eyes flickered down to your mother's necklace, then back up to meet your gaze. "I like the necklace."
It seemed genuine. So you responded with a simple, “Thanks.”
A few moments later the song ended, and you split apart, but for a beat, neither of you moved beyond that, caught in a strange limbo. The air between you felt charged, filled with unspoken words and conflicting emotions.
Then, as if snapping out of a trance, Lloyd cleared his throat. "I should..." he gestured vaguely towards the bar.
"Right," you nodded.
It seemed like he might say something more, but then his eyes flickered to something over your shoulder and his jaw tightened.
You turned to see what had caught his attention and found Victor making his way towards you, two flutes of champagne in hand.
When you turned back to glance at Lloyd, he was already gone. You shrugged it off.
"I believe I was promised another dance," Victor said smoothly as he approached, offering you one of the glasses.
“Yes, of course!” you responded, taking the glass he handed you.
“Or we could take these to the terrace and get some fresh air,” he suggested.
“That actually sounds perfect,” you said, giving him a grateful smile.
Victor led you through the crowd towards the terrace doors, his hand resting lightly on the small of your back. As you stepped out into the cool night air, you felt some of the tension from the evening begin to dissipate. The terrace overlooked a beautifully manicured garden, softly lit by strategically placed lanterns.
"Much better," Victor said, taking a sip of his champagne. "It was getting a bit stuffy in there, don't you think?"
You nodded, leaning against the stone balustrade and looking out over the gardens. "It's beautiful out here," you murmured, taking in the twinkling lights and the sweet scent of night-blooming flowers.
Victor moved to stand beside you, close enough that you could feel the warmth radiating from his body. "So," he said, his voice low and intimate, "what did Hansen’s heir apparent want with you?”
You tensed slightly at his proximity and the tone of his question. "Just to dance," you replied carefully, taking a sip of champagne. "And to apologize for the awkwardness at dinner."
Victor raised an eyebrow. "How magnanimous of him," he said, a hint of sarcasm in his voice. "Lloyd Hansen isn't exactly known for his apologies."
You turned to face him, studying his expression. There was something in his eyes - a glint of curiosity, perhaps even jealousy? - that made you uneasy.
"People can surprise you," you said neutrally, trying to steer the conversation away from Lloyd.
Victor tutted at your response and cocked his head to the side.
You frowned, feeling a flicker of annoyance at his attitude. "I don’t say that with wide eyes and rose-colored glasses. I'm not some naive intern."
Victor held up his hands in a placating gesture. "I didn't mean to imply that you were," he said, his tone softening. "I apologize if it came across that way. I just... I worry about you getting caught up in the Hansen family drama. It can be all-consuming."
You sighed, taking another sip of champagne. "I appreciate your concern, Victor, but I can handle myself. I'm not looking to get involved in anyone's drama - I'm here to do my job and build my career."
Victor nodded, a small smile playing at his lips. "Of course. And you're doing an excellent job of that, by the way. You've made quite an impression on everyone here."
You felt a flush of pride at his words, but also a twinge of wariness. Victor's compliments, while flattering, were starting to feel a bit too effusive.
Victor moved closer, his eyes glinting in the soft light of the terrace. "You've made quite an impression on me," he murmured, his voice low and husky. He reached out, his fingers brushing lightly against your bare arm.
You tensed at his touch, a mixture of unease and surprise coursing through you. "Victor, I..."
But he pressed on, seemingly oblivious to your discomfort. "You're not just intelligent, you know. You're absolutely captivating." His hand moved to your waist, pulling you slightly closer. The scent of his cologne, which had seemed pleasant earlier, now felt cloying and overwhelming.
You took a step back. "I'm flattered, really, but I think you've misunderstood. I'm not interested in anything beyond a professional relationship."
You tensed as Victor moved closer, his hand sliding to your lower back. "Come now," he murmured, his breath hot against your ear. "I’m not looking for a relationship. We're both adults here. No need to play coy."
You tried to step back again, but his arm snaked around your waist, holding you in place. Your heart raced, a mixture of fear and anger coursing through you.
"Victor, please," you said firmly, pushing against his chest. "I'm not interested. This isn't appropriate."
But he remained undeterred. His fingers trailed up your arm, leaving goosebumps in their wake. "We have such amazing chemistry," he purred. "Don't tell me you haven't felt it too."
You glanced towards the terrace doors, hoping to catch someone's eye, but the party inside continued on, oblivious to your predicament.
Victor leaned in closer, his lips brushing against your ear. "Think about it," he murmured, his voice low and seductive. "We could slip away right now. No one would even notice we're gone."
You tried to lean away, but found yourself trapped between his body and the stone balustrade. "Victor, please," you said firmly, pressing your hands against his chest. "No. This isn't appropriate."
But he seemed oblivious to your discomfort, his hand sliding to your lower back, pulling you flush against him. "Don't be so uptight," he chided softly. "Everyone has a bit of fun at conferences."
Your skin crawled at his touch, your heart racing with a mix of fear and anger. You glanced towards the terrace doors again, but still no one, only music and laughter and clinking glasses pouring out the doors.
Victor's other hand moved up, his fingers trailing along your neck. Your skin crawled at his touch as he leaned in, clearly intending to kiss you. You whimpered, struggling against him, and turning your face away.
He chuckled and his lips landed on your throat, hot and wet and paralyzing.
Then suddenly, Victor's oppressive presence was pulled back. Your eyes flew open to see Lloyd forcefully trying to yank Victor back by his shoulder.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Lloyd snarled, his blue eyes flashing dangerously.
But Victor was stronger than he seemed, and he was still clutching at you, quickly recovering from Lloyd's sudden appearance. "This is none of your business, Hansen," he spat.
"Like hell it isn't," Lloyd growled.
The three of your struggled for another moment before Lloyd landed a punch to Victor’s face and was finally able to tear the man away from you, the last point of contact his strong clutch to the side of your neck.
Once free, you backed away and Lloyd positioned himself between you and Victor, his stance protective. "She clearly told you no. Or are you too drunk to understand basic consent?"
You continued to back away, and you could already feel tears of humiliation and anger trailing down your cheeks, though you didn’t know when you’d started to cry.
Victor's face contorted with anger. "You don't know what you’re talking about, you spoiled, corporate nepo prince.”
You took advantage of Lloyd and Victor's heated argument to slip away, your heart pounding in your chest. As you retreated, their angry voices faded into the background noise of the gala. You darted through the terrace doors, blinking as you re-entered the bright ballroom.
The cheerful music and laughter felt jarring after what had just transpired. You ducked your head down and weaved through the crowd, desperately trying to avoid drawing attention to yourself.
As you neared the main doors, you spotted a discreet side entrance marked "Staff Only." Without hesitation, you slipped through it, finding yourself in a dimly lit service corridor. The stark fluorescent lighting and utilitarian decor was a stark contrast to the opulence of the ballroom and a blessed escape from the cacophony of people at the party.
You rushed down the corridor, your heels clicking rapidly on the polished floor. Your mind raced as you tried to process what had just happened, the nice night turned nightmare.
You turned a corner and found yourself facing a bank of elevators. Without thinking, you jabbed at the call button repeatedly, desperate to put as much distance between yourself and the afterparty as possible. When the doors finally slid open, you stumbled inside, pressing the button for your floor with shaking hands.
As the elevator began to ascend, you leaned against the wall, closing your eyes and taking deep, steadying breaths. The tears you'd been holding back began to flow freely now that you were alone. You angrily wiped them away, smearing your carefully applied makeup.
The elevator dinged, announcing your arrival at your floor, and you nearly ran down the hallway. It took your unsteady hands longer than usual to get your door open, but once you managed it, you flung yourself inside, and then leaned against it, letting out a sob as you sunk to the floor.
The events on the terrace replayed in your mind, and you felt a wave of nausea wash over you. Victor's unwanted advances, the fear you'd felt when he wouldn't let go, the humiliation of needing to be rescued… and by Lloyd Hansen, out of anyone who could have found you… A stranger would have been so much better.
You put your hand to your chest, trying to steady yourself, but then your breath hitched and another wave of emotion crashed over you.
Somewhere in the commotion of the struggles and your escape, you lost your mother’s necklace.
next chapter: coming January 13
🥺
↠ Main Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest
I do not do tag lists, but FOLLOW @buckets-and-stories and TURN ON NOTIFICATIONS to be updated any time I publish a new work!
#lloyd hansen#lloyd hansen x reader#lloyd hansen x you#lloyd hansen x y/n#chris evans characters#aspen wrote something#huffily ever after#aspen's birthday jubilee
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halp @honey-minded-hivemind
im trying to makes sure this sounds coolish and not silly
Suddenly there is a wall of flames. Creed jerks back as his nose is thrown off the scent. He snorts and jerks away from the hallway that looks like the fiery gates of hell.”
“Get the petits out! Go Marius! Make sure Henri gets the message.”
A voice calls beyond the flames, a note of care echoing about. Creed shakes off the sting to his nose and presses forward through the flames as Logan catches up to him. They surge forward together and then are met with a sword wielder. The man is wearing a similar outfit to the other people they had seen. His eyes glitter with anger. The blade is paired with a pistol.
“I don't think you need to be goin’ no deeper into the heart of mon guild. Thinkin’ you gonna be stopping here, me.”
The man states tapping the stones with his blade.
“Move.”
Wolverine snarls. The man’s eyes narrow, hatred etched into his face.
“In all my years I have hated no group more than you tatailles.”
And then the man fires. The battle is lightning quick, the man blocking their claw swipes with the blade… that seems to be made of something stronger than adamantium. Creed snaps and snarls as bullets accurately hit his joints. He can hear Logan snarling too. The man is edging them backward towards the white-hot flames. The man fights with no fear, hatred sweeping through every movement. There are no words exchanged, just the loud crackling of the flames, the shrieking bang of an unmuzzled gun, the snapping of teeth, and the clang of claws on metal. Yells fill the hall, echoing from other passages, calls for assurance, threats, and whistles high and piercing.
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Month 20 - Leaffall
Prev | First | Next
“I want to come,” Floodstrike said firmly, walking sharply in step with Goldenstar as she went about the final preparations for her meeting with the city cats. She stopped, gave a pained sigh, and looked her apprentice over. His jaw was tightly set, his forepaws sheathing and unsheathing their claws in the grass with excess energy. At least, she noticed, his eyes weren’t raw and red anymore.
“Floodstrike,” she began carefully.
“I know,” he interrupted, “this is important and you don’t want me to mess it up but, I promise, I won’t do anything stupid. I just want to be there in case things go wrong.”
Goldenstar couldn’t help but let out a sympathetic breath through her nose. “I understand,” she said, “I really do, but this meeting took weeks to arrange. I’m only bringing warriors who I can trust to stay cool headed.”
“You can trust me, Goldenstar,” he begged, leaning in. “Please. I need to be there.”
Goldenstar took a slow, deep breath, closed her eyes, and then let it out with a huff. “Fine. I’m trusting you.” Opening her eyes, she searched his face for his reaction.
“Thank you!” he deflated slightly with relief. “I promise you won’t regret it.”
“Go eat a meal and tell Oddstripe to make you a portion of traveling herbs,” she said with a twitch of her ear. Floodstrike nodded dutifully and bounded off towards the healer’s den. Goldenstar sighed again.
After a beat to collect herself, Goldenstar resumed her preparations. She stopped Russetfrond and made sure that there wasn’t anything they hadn’t already discussed that needed her attention before she left. This time he didn’t seem resistant to staying home which was a relief. She honestly couldn’t blame him. If something happened to Bluekit and Yellowkit while he was away, she knew he would never forgive himself.
Next, she went to check on Aldertail and found her with Oddstripe making the bundles of herbs for the journey. She went over the emergency protocol with Aldertail again, making sure that she knew exactly who to go to if another attack was launched while they were away. Aldertail nodded, seeming reassured by the repetition of the plan, which had been Goldenstar’s intention.
Before she left, Oddstripe asked, “Is it true you agreed to let Floodstrike go along?”
“Yeah,” she nodded, belly clenching nervously.
“Okay,” Oddstripe nodded and looked down. “Just make sure he comes home safe, alright?”
“Of course,” said Goldenstar with genuine fervor. “I won’t take a single risk I don’t have to.”
“Oh, thank you,” the healer sniffled and smiled up at her and she felt her chest tighten. She hoped she would be able to keep her promise.
When she stepped outside, Scorchplume fell into step beside her and said, “SkyClan is here. Orangestar should be waiting for us at the thunderpath.”
“Good,” she nodded. “Let's get everyone together and get ready to go.”
“Alright,” Scorch said without looking at her, the picture of a regal advisor. “I’ll fetch Songdust. Why don’t you grab Coyotechaser?”
“And Floodstrike,” Goldenstar said, bracing herself.
“What?” Scorch’s regality dissipated like someone smacking a dandelion puff. Keeping her voice low but her tone sharp, she whispered, “No. No way! Goldenstar, we talked about this, we can’t afford any rash behavior!”
“I know, I know, but he swore he would be on his best behavior,” tried Goldenstar.
“So did Fogpaw,” huffed Scorch, “that doesn’t mean she gets to tag along!”
“We could use the extra muscle,” she argued.
“At what cost?” Scorchplume lashed her tail, took a deep breath and said, “Look. I love you, Goldie,” (and Goldenstar puffed up with affection, much to Scorch’s annoyance) “but your judgment is impaired here! You’re too soft on him. It isn’t fun but he’s just going to have to suck it up and stay home and you’re going to have to suck it up and tell him so.” It took a good deal of effort for Goldenstar not to squirm under Scorch’s piercing scowl.
“I understand where you’re coming from,” she said firmly, “but the choice has already been made. It’s gonna look bad if I undo my decision because you told me to.” Scorchplume looked askance, ears swiveling backward. Quickly, Goldenstar added, “Besides, I’m trusting Floodstrike and I’m asking you to trust me. I don’t want to make you feel like I cornered you into going along with this or anything.” She gently laid her tail over Scorch’s, hoping that she hadn’t just accidentally threatened her kind-of-sort-of-partner.
Scorch was still for a moment, likely processing something behind her mask. Then she said, “It’s fine, you couldn’t corner me if you tried.” Goldenstar chuckled a little and wrapped her tail more tightly around Scorch’s.
“That’s good. I promise that if he does anything out of line I’ll send him home.”
“You’d better,” Scorch said, looking up at her. “We probably won’t get a second chance at this.”
“I know,” Goldenstar said with the appropriate solemnity. “I won’t let this opportunity slip through our claws.”
Scorch sighed, nodded, and bumped her head against Goldenstar’s forehead. “Alright.”
“Goldenstar!” Coyotechaser called over from where she was standing with Greyvoice and Couragecry who were scheduled to join a border patrol. “Are we ready to go?”
“Just about!” she called back, “We’ll grab our traveling herbs and head out.”
~~~
After meeting up with Orangestar, the group - Goldenstar, Scorchplume, Songdust, Floodstrike, and Coyotechaser - crossed the thunderpath and headed for the city. The afternoon stretched into evening and as they approached, Goldenstar watched in wonder as the city lights came to life one by one.
“Remember,” Scorchplume told them as they walked, “When we get to the meeting, I’ll do the speaking for all of us. If you have something you want said, let me know and I’ll phrase it in a way that the city cats will respond favorably to.”
“Right,” Coyotechaser said cautiously.
“Also,” Goldenstar said, “As far as the city cats know, I’m the leader of all the Clans. At this point, we think it's best to leave it that way. The less they actually know about us, the better. While we’re in the city, you and Orangestar are my advisors, just like Scorchplume.”
“I can see the reason in that,” admitted the SkyClan deputy.
“In that case,” said Orangestar, “it might be good to avoid calling me Orangestar, just in case.”
“That’s smart,” said Goldenstar, smiling fondly at her friend. “Guess you’ll be Orangeleaf again for a while.”
“Guess so,” laughed Orangestar bashfully.
They padded along for a while longer before they reached the large gravel path that led into the city. Goldenstar led them along the edge of it, trying to steady her nerves. This was where things got dangerous. The plan relied on them drawing as little attention to themselves as possible and the closer they got, the more likely it was that they would be seen and possibly attacked.
Her fears were realized when they spotted a small cluster of cats loitering across the gravel from them, just little ginger and white and grey smudges in the fading light. Coyotechaser growled a low warning to the others, tail bristling, and Goldenstar held her tail out behind her to try and settle the group.
“Easy,” she said.
The group of cat shapes up ahead stood and started loping back to the city and Floodstrike lunged after them before Goldenstar had a chance to say anything. Quickly, Songdust hooked a paw out in front of him, tumbling him forward. He caught himself before hitting the gravel and turned back to glare at her.
“Floodstrike!” Goldenstar hissed so that the city cats wouldn’t be able to hear. “What are you doing?”
“They’re going to get reinforcements!” he cried indignantly.
“Or,” Scorchplume cut in sharply, “they’re with Rudy and attacking them would have ruined the entire meeting!” Orangestar glanced from Scorch to Goldenstar with worry and Coyotechaser squinted inscrutably at Floodstrike. Songdust just looked pitying. Under all these gazes, Floodstrike’s big ears wilted behind him and he pressed his mouth into a thin line.
“I’m sorry, Goldenstar,” he said, “I- I thought I was helping.”
“I know,” she sighed, avoiding the pointed look that Scorch was giving her. “Let’s keep going. We don’t have time to waste out in the open.” She ducked her head and started going, knowing that a number of unpleasant conversations were going to be had eventually.
They walked in silence the rest of the way to Luna’s garden. The little lilac kittypet was waiting for them on top of the fence and smiled in greeting, ushering them over the fence with her tail.
“Welcome! Welcome!” she purred, blushing when she made eye contact with Floodstrike. “Schmidt should be here soon, you can wait under the bench by the hydrangeas.”
“Thank you,” Goldenstar thanked her and hopped the fence with a quick bound.
When her paws hit the ground, Scorchplume was right behind her, saying softly, “I told you not to bring him.”
“I know,” Goldenstar whispered back. “I’ll handle it.”
“Good,” huffed Scorch. She led the way to the bench, which was good since Goldenstar had no idea what a bench was in the first place, and the other cats followed, clustering underneath the odd wooden structure with their backs against the wilting hydrangea blossoms.
“You trust this Schmidt cat?” Coyotechaser asked.
“I do,” Goldenstar nodded.
“He kept me safe while I was in the city,” said Songdust. “He’s a good cat, if a bit idealistic.”
“That’s good,” mewed Orangestar.
Goldenstar glanced past her to where Floodstrike was sitting, tail curled around his paws and she swallowed in shame when he met her gaze a second later. He could tell he was in trouble and they were both miserable about it. She quickly averted her gaze and tried to go over the meeting points in her mind.
A short time later, two cats crested the fence and followed Luna over to the bench. The first cat was Schmidt, a kind smile on his face as he approached, and the second was a cat who looked exactly like him but with a slightly brighter tint to his ginger fur, much like Orangestar. The second cat followed closely behind Schmidt. His eyes wandered the yard for any sign of danger but his face bore a politely empty expression rather than a threatening or anxious one. Goldenstar stepped out from under the bench to meet them and the others followed suit.
“Evenin’, Goldenstar,” said Schimdt with a well mannered dip of the head. “This is my brother, Westen. He insisted on comin’ to watch my back.” At his introduction, Westen dipped his head in kind and briefly flashed a smile.
“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Westen,” Goldenstar said.
“Please, ma’am, call me Wes,” said Wes with a twang and a humble smile. Goldenstar couldn’t help but smile herself.
“Of course,” she said. Then, back to Schimdt, “Is everything ready for the meeting?”
“As ready as it’ll ever be,” Schimdt said with a nervous huff. “We’ll be meetin’ on a friend’s balcony at sundown. We prolly ought to head over there now though. Don’t wanna get caught like a squirrel in a bottle.” Goldenstar nodded instead of asking what a bottle or a balcony was.
“Right, let’s get going then,” she said.
Scorchplume cleared her throat, looking strained.
Goldenstar frowned. “Right. Floodstrike, I’m going to need you to stay here.”
“Goldenstar, please!” Floodstrike protested. “It was one mistake, I promise it won’t happen again.”
“You already promised me and you broke your promise,” Goldenstar said. “I’m sorry. Stay here with Luna. If something goes wrong we’ll have someone send you for help.”
Floodstrike opened his mouth to protest then closed it with a soft clack. Looking down, he sighed, “Alright.” Goldenstar smiled, bittersweet. She was proud, at least, that he hadn’t tried to keep arguing.
“Alright, let’s go,” she said, and Schmidt nodded and turned to lead the way.
On the edge of her hearing, Goldenstar caught Wes whispering to Luna, “Miss Luna, will you be alright on your own with this fella?”
“Oh, don’t worry, Wes,” Luna purred, “We get on peachy.” Then she laughed like she’d told a joke.
This seemed enough to put Wes at ease and he said simply, “Alright then. Don’t forget to fetch your Folk if you need anythin',” before slinking back into place behind Schmidt’s right shoulder. Goldenstar chuckled a bit and hung back to speak with Floodstrike.
“Hey,” she said softly and he looked up with big, guilty eyes. “Don’t beat yourself up so bad you forget to enjoy yourself, ‘kay?”
“W-” Floodstrike frowned then glanced past her to Luna before blushing with understanding. “Oh. That’s- I’m not-”
“It’s alright,” Goldenstar laughed a little. “Whatever happens, it’ll be alright as long as you feel comfortable. Don’t forget to stand up for yourself.”
“Alright,” he swallowed dryly.
With that, Goldenstar bounded to catch up before anyone could call for her and the group hopped the fence and darted across the thunderpath towards the meeting place.
#clangenrising#clangen#clan gen#warrior cats#warriors#warrior cats oc#warriors oc#clangen oc#clan gen oc#Goldenstar#Floodstrike#Scorchplume#Songdust#Oddstripe#Coyotechaser#Orangestar#Luna#Schmidt#Wes#leaffall
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Between Pride and Fire (the ravine)
- Summary: A short story set ten years after the Dance that reveals what happened in the ravine.
- Pairing(s): targ!reader/Jason Lannister, Aemma Lannister (reader's daughter)/Cregan Stark
- Rating: Mature 16+
- Previous part: the final chapter
- Tag(s): @sachaa-ff @oxymakestheworldgoround @punk-in-docs @barnes70stark
Ten Years After The Dance
The snow fell softly over Winterfell, blanketing the ancient stones in a pristine white. The Stark children’s laughter echoed through the yard as they played in the snow, their joy piercing the cold, solemn air. Inside the great hall, the warmth of roaring fires chased away the chill, the glow of the flames reflecting off the polished wooden beams.
Lady Aemma Stark, born a lioness but now a wolf in the North, stood by one of the narrow windows, her eyes distant as they gazed out into the flurry beyond. Her gown of deep gray and silver fur swept the stone floor as she leaned slightly against the frame, her posture poised but uncharacteristically distracted. Her golden hair, a Lannister hallmark, was pinned up with silver adornments, though a few strands framed her face, adding to her pensive air.
Behind her, Cregan Stark entered the hall quietly, his boots crunching softly against the stone. The years had added to his already commanding presence, his broad shoulders carrying the weight of his responsibilities with ease. His wolf-gray eyes, sharp and perceptive, immediately caught the faraway look in his wife’s gaze.
He approached her, his voice low and gentle. “The snow falls thick today, yet your thoughts seem elsewhere, my lady.”
Aemma turned slightly, startled out of her reverie. She smiled faintly, her golden eyes meeting his. “I’m sorry, my lord. I was… I was just watching the children.”
Cregan studied her for a moment, his expression unreadable but knowing. “It is not the children that hold your thoughts,” he said, stepping closer. “I know that look, Aemma. You’ve worn it many times.”
She sighed, her shoulders lowering slightly as she turned back to the window. “It’s been ten years, Cregan,” she murmured. “Ten years since my mother, my father, and my uncle disappeared without a trace. Sometimes I think… I think I’ve made peace with it. But other times…”
Her voice faltered, and Cregan placed a steadying hand on her shoulder. “You wonder what became of them,” he finished for her, his voice steady and calm. “It is only natural. Their absence left a wound, even here in the North.”
Aemma nodded, her gaze fixed on the swirling snow outside. “There are so many stories, so many whispers. Some say my mother and father died in that ravine. Others say they survived, that they… that they’re somewhere far away, together.” She paused, her voice barely above a whisper. “And then there’s my uncle Daemon. He left to search for them, but he never returned either. It’s like they vanished, swallowed by the world.”
Cregan tightened his grip on her shoulder, drawing her attention back to him. “Your mother was a dragon, Aemma. Your father a lion. And Daemon Targaryen… well, he was Daemon Targaryen. If there is any truth to those tales, then they are out there, together. And I cannot think of three people less likely to give up on one another.”
Her lips curved into a faint smile, though her eyes still glistened. “You’re always so certain, aren’t you?” she asked, a hint of teasing in her tone.
Cregan’s own lips twitched into a small smile. “It’s my duty as your husband to be your rock,” he said simply. “Even when the world feels uncertain.”
Aemma turned fully to face him, her hand rising to rest over his on her shoulder. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, Cregan.”
He tilted his head slightly, his smile softening. “You’d endure. You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for, my lioness.”
The sound of laughter interrupted them, and they both turned to see their children, led by their eldest son Orin, bursting into the hall, their cheeks red from the cold. Aemma’s expression brightened as she knelt to embrace them, her momentary sadness melting away in their warmth.
Cregan watched her with a mixture of pride and quiet affection. As the children clamored for their mother’s attention, he turned his gaze briefly to the window, the snow beyond seeming endless. He knew the weight of her thoughts would never truly leave her, but he vowed to be the anchor that kept her steady through it all.
And as the fire crackled behind him, he silently offered a prayer to the old gods that whatever shadows lingered in their past, they would never darken the lives of the family they were building together.
The Vale was quiet under the pale light of a waning moon, the snow-draped peaks and jagged rocks standing as silent sentinels. The cold was biting, but Lord Cregan Stark felt it less than his men, his Northern blood accustomed to harsher winters. His horse snorted softly as they approached the edge of the ravine, the same one whispered about in hushed tones by the shepherds and hunters of the region. It was said to be bottomless, cursed, and the last place where dragons had been seen in these parts.
The sound of hooves crunching snow ceased as Cregan raised his hand to signal a halt. His men drew their cloaks tighter around them, exchanging wary glances as they took in the black maw of the ravine. It seemed to devour the light around it, a gaping void in the earth that stretched endlessly downward.
“My lord,” Ser Garmon, a grizzled knight with a keen eye, rode up beside him. “This is the place, isn’t it? The one the stories speak of?”
Cregan nodded, his gray eyes scanning the jagged edges of the ravine. “Aye. This is where Princess Y/N and Prince Aemond were said to have fallen. And where her husband, Jason Lannister, and Prince Daemon disappeared.”
The men muttered among themselves, their voices low as if afraid to disturb the eerie silence. One of them, a younger scout named Arthor, dismounted and crept closer to the edge. He knelt, running his gloved hand along the rock. “Look here, my lord,” he called out, his voice tight with unease.
Cregan dismounted and strode over, his boots crunching against the frost-covered ground. Arthor pointed to a set of deep gouges carved into the stone, long and parallel, like claw marks.
“Claw marks,” Arthor said, his voice barely above a whisper. “A dragon’s claws, no doubt about it.”
Cregan crouched beside him, tracing the grooves with his fingers. The marks were old, weathered by time but unmistakable. They started near the bottom of the ridge and trailed upward, but they stopped short of the edge.
“Not just any dragon,” Cregan murmured, standing and dusting his gloves. “These are from a beast far larger than Morrath or Caraxes. This was Vhagar.”
The men behind him exchanged uneasy glances. Ser Garmon frowned, his brow furrowed. “Vhagar? Then she survived the fall?”
Cregan nodded, his expression grim. “For a time, at least. These marks tell the tale. She tried to climb out, but her injuries were too great. She never made it to the top.” He looked down into the shadowed depths of the ravine, his breath fogging in the cold air. “Whatever strength she had left would’ve turned to desperation. And desperation in a wounded dragon is a deadly thing.”
Arthor swallowed hard, his gaze fixed on the black void below. “You think she was still there when Daemon came?”
Cregan’s face darkened, his voice low and heavy. “I do. Daemon would’ve landed Caraxes to search for the others. And if Vhagar was still alive, starving and feral…” He let the implication hang in the air.
The men murmured again, their voices laced with unease. Ser Garmon crossed his arms, his expression grim. “Two dragons in a pit like this, wounded and enraged... It’d be a fight to the death.”
Cregan nodded. “And no man, not even Daemon Targaryen, could survive being caught between them.”
One of the younger men, barely more than a squire, stepped forward hesitantly. “But, my lord, if Vhagar and Caraxes fought, wouldn’t there have been signs? Bones, scales, something?”
Cregan’s gaze remained fixed on the abyss. “Not if the fight ended with both dragons plunging deeper into the ravine. The depths here are said to be endless. If they fell… they’re lost to the dark.”
A heavy silence fell over the group, the weight of his words sinking in. The men shuffled uneasily, some glancing over their shoulders as if expecting the shadow of a dragon to emerge from the void.
Cregan straightened, his voice steady but cold. “Whatever happened here, it ends with us. The realm has enough ghosts without adding more. Speak of this to no one.”
The men nodded, their silence a solemn agreement as they began to mount their horses. Cregan lingered by the edge a moment longer, his hand resting on the hilt of his sword. His thoughts turned to his wife, Aemma, and the loss she carried like a hidden wound.
Turning back to his men, he swung into his saddle and spurred his horse forward. As they rode away from the ravine, Cregan couldn’t shake the feeling that the shadows of this place would follow them, a lingering reminder of the Dance and all it had cost.
#house of the dragon#hotd#fire and blood#game of thrones#asoiaf#a song of ice and fire#hotd x reader#hotd x you#hotd x y/n#house targaryen#house lannister#house stark#x reader#oc x cregan stark#cregan stark#hotd cregan#jason lannister#hotd jason#jason x reader#jason x you#jason x y/n#between pride and fire
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