#but in regards to these ex friends like I said things ended shittily

[vitiateoriginator]

Finding the blogs of some of your ex-friends is so wild

[tumblunni]

Bunni’s Rune Factory 4 Headcanons Even More So

okay MISC CHARACTER HEADCANONS AND THINGS

* first and most important one: arthur and dylas consider porcoline their adopted father just like margaret does, and they all see each other as siblings. Its never actually stated in canon but IT HAS TO BE TRUE OKAY * I wish Illuminata, Bado and Pico could have been marriages in dlc or something. Thats not really a headcanon but I wanted to mention it. * ALL THE GAY JOKES ARE NOW NOT JOKES BUT CANON. That is my headcanon. Stop teasing me with ‘lol isnt it somehow funny that they seem to be gay but arent’, and give me more actual being the what they are. Pico has a crush on Dolce, Doug and Dylas have a crush, Margaret is totally crushing on Forte, imagine a universe where all of that gets to be canon and not just a ‘joke’! And imagine if these characters that’re implied to be gay or bisexual could get to be gay or bisexual with regards to the protagonist too! If dylas, doug, margaret and forte could be marriageable no matter which gender you picked! Maybe if you could have some options that’re exclusively gay too? Perhaps pico is the lesbian marriage and I dunno.. bado could be gay because he’s kinda bara? XD Tho I think it’d be neat if frey could marry him too, i just wish he had a route in general. * Also i wish we could have been able to help Arthur track down his mother again and reconcile with her. It was mega heartwarming that you could help him discover that his mother loved him all along and only left because of outside cricumstances involving the controversy of arthur being the product of his father’s affair with a commoner, but still we dont know where she is now and whether she’s happy. I like to hope maybe she’s out there still alive somewhere, and maybe she collects newspaper clippings hearing about her son’s adventures as super businessman prince! And thus someday she hears that he moved to selphia and married frey the commoner, and maybe this leads to her deciding to come back and confess why she really left. And also maybe the marriage to the protagonist could help society get over the whole predjudice and stuff and arthur’s mum could regain a better reputation in the eyes of the nobles. or maybe she never does and she just ends up moving into selphia and never being able to return to her home city, but still its all ok cos at least she can hug her son and meet her new grandkid. * My thoughts for the guardians who didnt get much said about their past lives! For Amber the game says she ‘wanted to fly with ventuswill’ and thats at least more than we know for Dylas, but still its very undeveloped. My headcanon is that maybe she was a pilot? or like.. lived in an era before airships were actually invented, and was someone who dreamed of finding a way to make it possible. And her notes were discovered after she vanished, and ended up inspiring the person who ended up inventing the first flying machine! And even though now she can fly on her own wings, it could be heartwarming for her to find out about this and have a bit of conclusion to her life. I also headcanon that Amber’s relationship with Ventuswill was maybe more like an adoptive mother-daughter thing? I think it would fit with how strange and monster-like Amber thinks sometimes, even though she must have been human to begin with. I mean maybe thats just how the magic works and if you’re a weirdo who loves eating raw potatos and climbing trees to steal honey from beehives you become a butterfly?? But I think it could work if maybe she was an orphan who was raised by the native dragon and ended up a little ditzy because she hadn’t interacted with humans much until nowadays. like, maybe this was a period when ventuswill was mourning the first person who became a guardian (what order did it happen, actually...?) and she became more solitary instead of having this personal presence in the town. She flew off to watch over selphia from within the forest cave instead, and found an abandoned child by chance. And then once Amber had grown up she was always trying to drop her off at the town and make her live with her own kind, but amber would always find her way back. And ventuswill was like ‘aww shit no i ended up loving someone again’ and couldnt stop amber from finding out about the guardian ritual and doing it too. And like... the only reason ventuswill went back to the town was because now corrupted-amber is the boss of the forest area and ventuswill cant break through her magic to get back in. So amber’s sacrifice also helped convince venti to open up to other people again. *eternal sobbing* * And my headcanons for Dylas’s past are less developed, but I was considering maybe the idea that he was the last one to be guardianized? And by this point it had become seen as a tradition by the people of selphia, and they would like.. look for a human sacrifice, rather than it being someone who willingly did it. It was a very dark time in the town’s history. It was nearly the end of the town not because it was in danger, but because if they’d gone through with such a horrible plan it just wouldnt be selphia anymore. Those people wouldnt be worth protecting, it probably would have caused ventuswill to leave and never return. So anyway I was thinking maybe Dylas was some sort of weird loner fisherman on the edge of town that everyone hated, so they considered him the one who should be sacrificed. And he was so lonely and suicidal that he wanted to agree to it, just because he wanted to die and didnt care how. But then ventuswill put a stop to the angry mob and rescued him, and he regained his faith in people and found his first and greatest friend as he got to know her. So in the end he performed the ritual out of his own free will, after realizing she was the one who would be saved by his sacrifice. And she was haunted by the guilt that by saving him she’d inadvertantly caused him to go down the same path anyway, just for different reasons. And then Dylas is just way more happy nowadays because whatever reason the town hated him is now gone, and he’s seeing how kind and wonderful its become, and he’s never had so many friends before!! And he can still go fishing and hang out with venti, and even meet three other people who also loved venti enough to die, and bond over their super sadness together. Oh! An idea! Maybe Dylas was part of a different race of nomadic humans who travel in caravans, and the town treated him so shittily because they were racist fucks? I was just thinking how that could maybe be a reason why his monster form was a horse, if maybe horses were a highly respected animal in his home culture, and he’s all estranged from it and stuck living in a foreign land with a bunch of intolerant bastards. And it could be extra heartwarming cos nowadays he’s living in the future version of this town that is even more foreign to him, but nowadays that racial tension is less common and he’s actually been welcomed as one of them. And maybe he could have extra quests added to his rather short romance route, cos he could be trying to learn whether his clan actually survived and still exists nowadays. And then have a heartwarming reunion with the grandchild of one of his siblings maybe? look, everyone else in the batchelors got a big sad questline, why cant perfect tsundere horseman join them?? IT WOULD BE THE SADDEST OF ALL THE SADS * also it would be really cool if when you married the guardian characters your child could inherit monster powers! I’m still gonna forever headcanon that they do, even if they dont get any of the appearance traits. It would be so cute if noel/luna could poof into a tiny baby unicorn and dylas is just sobbing with pride :3 * also headcanon: I wish Leon’s fox statue guardians could move into the city after you marry him, and be like loving uncle babysitters to your child! the excuse would be like ‘we need to protect the next in the proud dragon priest lineage’. And maybe once they leave the temple they could be stuck in de-powered tiny pet forms of cute? * Oh and a possible headcanon that the name Leon is passed down from father to son in Leon’s family. That’d explain why that temple is called Leon Karnak. Unless it was renamed into a memorial to him after he sacrificed himself? But it could be cute if your kid with him was Leon Jr/Leona and had adorkable fox statue pets and was a prodigy champion in the buddy battle festival and made their parents proud. I HAVE MANY HEADCANONS! * Gahhhh I really dont know who I should marry! Arthur was the first one I dated and I really like him though I wish you could have a friend route with him where you still help him with his backstory problems, I dont feel like I like the ship as much. And then Leon’s backstory was so sad I feel guilty not marrying him, but Dylas’s marriage route was so BAD that I feel guilty not marrying him! He didnt get as many scenes as leon, so I wanna marry him instead so i can fly off headcanoning more scenes!! But gahhh leon!! I think I ship leon with female protagonist and dylas with the male one :P I might make two saves to try both. And a third save just to see what arthur’s route is like, though i still like him and female protagonist better as a brotp, yknow? Or maybe amicable exes. Or just people who dated once casually but didnt end up together. Or any way i could get the happy ending to his backstory stuff without having to date him, seriously why does everyone be backstory sad unless I date them?? Except dylas who DOESNT GET ANY SCREENTIME INSTEAD *pout* *....im gonna go back to the game and marry dylas aaaa * and everyone else * aaaaaaa * i just care so much about these characters * i think dylas might win cos marrying him also means my fave character porcoline becomes my father in law * i wonder if he’s at the wedding? that’d kinda confirm my headcanon dylas and arthur are like margaret’s adopted brothers. * I WANT EVERY FAM TO BE HAPPY AAA

[thedistancerunnerdiary]

My first semester of college

I know I’ve mentioned in previous posts the series of unfortunate events that occurred in my first semester of college that ultimately lead me to a broken and unhappy person, which lead me to transfer schools at the end of the semester. I wanted to take the time to talk about my experiences, in hopes that maybe this helps someone out there struggling with the same things!

I started off at a small DIII college in Iowa, about 3 hours from where I grew up. Something I should note is that this was the only school I visited, and basically was committed to going there after one visit. TIP FOR SENIORS: Visit more than one school! Even if the school may seem perfect, always go and check out other schools for comparison. That way you have more ideas of what college is like, what to expect, and maybe what you really do love or don’t love about that “perfect” school. 

As August started, I was just beginning to dread going to school. I had previously thought I was not going to have a problem with leaving for school, but as move in date for team camp approached, I just didn’t have any desire to go. I wasn’t excited, I wanted to stay home, and my boyfriend was also leaving to go to team camp at his school. Although we were only 45 minutes away, and our schools were conference rivals, I was not looking forward to not seeing him more days than I did. I know this sounds clingy, but think about it this way: I was going to a school where the only person I knew was my roommate and my ex; I’m sure being able to have someone as close as I am to my boyfriend would’ve made all the difference in the transition. Anyway, I came into team camp with a positive spot test for mono, which I had been running positive on and off for the past year, so this wasn’t new, but I was coming in not being able to do what everyone else did, and was given significantly lower mileage than everyone, and immediately felt like shit.

The beginning of October was when things started to go downhill. I started going home most weekends (6 hours round trip), and if I wasn’t at home, I was at my boyfriend’s school. At this point, the only thing getting my through the week was the weekend, when I got to see my boyfriend or go home to see my family. On top of that and looking back at it, both my boyfriend and I were stressed out with not being at the same school, college as a whole, and I think just having to fend for ourselves the whole time. This strained our relationship, and we were often short and frustrated with each other for pointless reasons that had nothing to do with us being together- I guess we both just took it out on each other. On the weekends we’d finally get to have decent conversations about our weeks and understand why the other was so UGH during the week. We’d have fun, go camping, and I got to meet a lot of this friends and teammates. 

One morning, we were doing a track workout before class to beat the heat of the day. It was repeat 1k’s just a touch slower than race pace. I had just been getting back into workouts as the mono flare went away, but during this workout, I knew something was wrong with my knee. I finished the workout, feeling crappy because I was not able to hit any of my times, and literally hobbled off the track. That night I couldn’t get up the stairs to my second floor dorm room, and skipped going to dinner because I didn’t want to walk- that’s how bad my knee hurt. The next morning I was 10 minutes late to the morning shake out because of how slow I had to move. I put myself on the bike, called my coach, and told him something was really wrong. I went and saw the trainers that afternoon and they suggested that the reason my knee hurt so bad was because of an inflamed plica. They said ultimately if that’s what I had, I would have to have surgery; but in the mean time I should be ultra sounding the area up to 3x/day. Not entirely trusting the trainers (I’ve just bad experiences with them, like the one in high school who told me I had compartment syndrome, then let me go run?? That was stress fractures 1-3) I made an appointment for an orthopedist at home. He ordered an MRI, and found a serious stress fracture that spanned from the front to the back of the head of my tibia (to visualize this, make a fist. The fist is the head of the tibia, the lines between the fingers is how the fracture ran). It turned out that the ultra sounding had made it worse, on top of continuing to do short runs and elliptical-ling. I was sentenced to 8-12 weeks no impact. If my first semester wasn’t already going shittily, this was the final blow- taking away the one thing that kept me sane and brought a little bit of happiness to my day. Because I couldn’t run, I stopped going to regular practice. I pretty much only left my room for class, meals, and to go to the local Y to aqua jog for an hour. I was not in a happy place physically and mentally, and even though I finished the semester strong academically (3.8 GPA) I was relieved when we finally went home for winter break. 

Over Christmas I was so happy. I was with my family, friends, and boyfriend all the time. I was allowed to begin biking for 30 minutes a few times a week, and I was so glad- I was getting tired going back and forth in the pool for hours. It was around this time that I started looking at my boyfriend’s school pretty seriously. I had before- within the first month, I knew my school wasn’t the school for me, but wanted to give it a fair chance. When I was looking at my boyfriend’s school, I figured I would finish out the school year at my current school, and if I still didn’t like it, I would transfer to his school next fall. It wasn’t until the morning I left to go back that I realized how much I didn’t want to go back. I didn’t want to go back to feeling less than my teammates, feeling lonely, and feeling like the busted burden that my team had to deal with. 

Since my boyfriend’s school is only 45 minutes away, we drove back together (I was starting spring classes, he went down early for track). We stopped halfway for dinner, and when he asked why I had been so quiet the ride down, I burst into tears and told him how much I wanted to not go back, and that I wanted to go home. Later that night, we called my parents and discussed my options. They knew how unhappy I was at school and we came to the decision that I had two options: either finish out the year, or come home and sit the semester out. Personally, I had no problem with sitting the semester out. I had come in with a semester’s worth of credit from AP classes, and figured I could work the semester, then transfer next fall. However, I was scared of the judgement I would receive from my friends, teammates, parents’ friends- everyone. So that night we decided I would finish the year, then transfer next fall. I got back to my school the next afternoon and was permitted to run 10 minutes around the track- my first run back. But I was not excited, in fact, the entire time I thought about how pointless it was to only be running 10 minutes. And I was devastated that it didn’t make me even slightly happy. That night my roommate asked what was wrong, and I broke down on her just like I had my boyfriend the night before. We called my parents and boyfriend, and they told me that for the sake of my mental health at the time, I couldn’t stay at my school. I was either going to come home, or I was going to cross my fingers and see if I could still transfer to my boyfriends school. I sent an email to the school’s transfer coordinator that night, and by morning I was given the okay to come.

The hardest part was telling my coach I was leaving, and that there was really nothing he could say to change it. He knew I was considering transferring next fall because I didn’t feel like I belonged or fit into the team and school, and he was super supportive. He even helped me fill out the transfer paper work for athletes, and encouraged me to get in touch with my new school’s coach to let them know I was coming. It was a weird feeling about transferring. It wasn’t like I hated that school, or the people on the team, or anyone I met. All of the professors were kind and helpful, my coach was great, every staff member I met were all very nice; it was just that I did not fit into the puzzle that was the school. Ultimately, I knew I was making the right choice for me, and even though it was a little scary basically starting college all over again, I was excited to be somewhere that I actually wanted to be.

Immediately, something clicked when I got to my new school. It was nice having my boyfriend there, and I think having someone to help my adjust but also take care of me during this whole ordeal was important to me doing well at this time. I contacted the coach, who was excited to hear that I was coming and wanted to meet with me right away. My new coach was so enthusiastic about getting me healthy and ready to compete again, and my favorite thing he said to me was “This is going to be exciting…we don’t even really know how good you are” (he said this in regards to me never have completed a full season of anything due to injury or illness). This reignited a fire that I thought had blown out- after my injury in October, I had questioned whether it might be a better idea just to give up competitive running- and after he said this, I knew I had more to give, and farther to push myself. I met the girls on the team that afternoon, immediately hit it off with all of them, and was allowed to run 10 minutes on the indoor track. This time the 10 minutes was the best 10 minutes of my entire school year so far, and really, that’s when I knew the decision to transfer was the right one for me.

I guess the moral of the story is that you have to do what is right for you, no matter what you think others will say and no matter how afraid you are to let someone else down. Transferring at semester was by no means easy for me at all. The week between telling my coach I was leaving and moving into my new school I didn’t eat, I filled out so much paper work, packed my room, had to tell the couple friends I made I was leaving and why, I cried a lot, and questioned whether I did just need to go home for the semester- but once I sat down and surrounded myself with people who loved and had my best intentions in mind, I figured out what I needed to do, no matter how scared I was to do it. Which leads me to lesson number two: have a support system. Surround yourself with positive people that you trust and know have your best interest in mind. It’s okay to be vulnerable. Ask for help, tell them how you’re really feeling, don’t bottle it up. I had been pushing back the feeling of not belonging since the beginning of the semester, and had I stopped to deal with it, maybe my semester at my old school wouldn’t have been so abrupt and dramatic. IT’S OKAY TO CRY. I hadn’t cried in years (no exaggeration), and I think I cried the most this past year that I ever have in a time span of 9 months. Sometimes you just gotta let it all out! Lastly, don’t give up on something that makes you happy. I was so close to just saying “screw it” when I was diagnosed with that stress fracture and throw in the towel. Today, I’m so glad I didn’t. Running has rewarded me with so many amazing experiences and people that I couldn’t imagine what I would do without it in my life. 

So I hope this long post was struck a chord with someone out there, and maybe give someone the courage to take hold of their unhappiness and turn it into positivity.