#but im here im successful and have WAY better friends uvu )

[airxn]

😡 :  Worse role play-related encounter and what advice you would give to others to avoid similar situations?

HO BOY– buckle in.

So, to set the stage, I was in this small, tight-knit group of friends about 4 years ago. We had our own verse that we rp'd in our discord, but it was a dumpster fire if I'm being honest. Nothing was plotted and all rps were in the form of the characters texting each other. And rps like that means shit is happening fast, so there was lots of ic drama happening and a lot of events happening.

I was in this friend group for about a half a year when ic events unfolded where Airin felt he was safer if he 'blocked' people's characters, since it was a text-based rp. I warned everyone before hand, having to state I still liked their characters ( and me feeling I had to say that is a red flag in of itself ), and none of them stated their discomfort or told me no. They asked if I was sure about going through with it, but that was all.

Forward to Airin doing the blockening, and everyone in the friend group suddenly got derailed for that week. I get a phone call at the end of the week by the Ring-leader as I'll put them, and was scolded at, being told people cried, etc. And at the time I felt awful, but now that I look back on it? I warned them. I told them what Airin wanted to do and was met with no opposition.

It was retconned, and supposedly we sorted it out. Yet they silently resented me for 3 whole months. I notice the Ring-leader's characters randomly start hating on Airin despite him not doing anything significant to make their characters react that way. I approached them asking why this was happening on multiple occasions since each time it was never called for, and I was met with little to no effort to come to an understanding or middle ground– just a 'I can't control how my characters act'.

Fast forward 3 months of this, I woke up with a DM stating people aren't comfortable with me in the gc and that they'll talk to me in 2 weeks. This made my whole mental and physical health collapse around me– these were people I talked to and vc'd with every day. These were people who I thought were my friends. Yet, I was given no warning prior. Just an immediate kick from my friend group, and the only contact I had was with the Ring-leader.

Two weeks pass, no one messages me. I'm the who has to confront the Ring-leader and make them talk to me. What was their reasoning for being uncomfortable? They claimed I was godmodding when I asked why their characters suddenly hated on mine. They claimed my characters were too powerful. They claimed I took things OOC all the time. And yet, it's not taking things OOC when they were the one's who cried when Airin, a character, blocked theirs. It's not godmodding to ask why their characters suddenly hated mine, when they were using their characters as an outlet for their feelings against me. And if they had a problem with my characters? They never once in the months they rp'd with expressed concern.

It was all bullshit. And yet when I tried to call them out they blocked me. This was the first time in my life I had a falling out with friends. It's why it affected me so bad as it did. I suffered in silence as to why these people who I thought cared about me faked it the entire time. I didn't get close to people for a long time. I really thought I was the bad guy.

It wasn't until I met my now best friend Sardonic that I felt I could begin to trust again. And when I took the steps to healing and trusting a group setting again, it was Wus's group chat that I found a safe place with amazing people who I could love and feel welcomed in.

I unfortunately don't have advice to how to avoid a similar situation like this. These friends were charismatic, and it was the first time I was a part of a group rp verse. They openly said how much they love me, and now I avoid people who say that to me a lot without actually knowing me. It feels fake and manipulative. I also am so, SO hesitant to do group rp verses again. I have a lot of scars from this, but I came out a better person.

All I can say is, fucking communicate with each other. Don't talk to other people about the situation and form a false narrative around it. That false narrative will feel like it's true to you, yet you have no idea what the other person is thinking or feeling. And don't ever use your mental illness as an excuse to harm others. Communication is key to keep things civil and to stop assumptions.