#but if she looks like she's staring into space then That's Them Byakugans Baby!

[cairafea]

team big jacket

[animeomegas]

MY FELLOW ANON ARE VIOLATING MY EMOTIONS TODAY 😂 god I’m acc crying. Your writing is amazing. I’m gonna combat the sadness with a wholesome thing of them finding a pup in a bin (or something) a few months after the loss of the first pup (Neji is currently shut down entirely) is like “lol gimme”. Proceeds to take the pup home, put it in his nest scent the lil bean (gender is your choice) and just be like “yeah this mine now”. Any nay sayers are ignored bc it’s still his baby (maybe almost like his pup reincarnated 👀👀) regardless of how baby was obtained. Idk I just think my guy needs some positivity after life kicking the ever loving shit out of him

This is beautiful and you’re right, Neji deserves the world, but I’ll settle with a quiet life and some happiness for my boy!

Okay, so things haven’t been…good with Neji since you had to let your pup die to save him.

It has been two months and still he lays in his nest every day, sometimes crying, sometimes whining, but mostly just staring at nothing. He had incorporated a bunch of baby stuff (blankets, toys etc.) into his nest before he went to the hospital, in order to make his pup feel more at home in the nest when he was supposed to bring them back. You had tried to take them out to stop him having to be confronted with what happened in his safe space, but Neji almost attacked you for doing so, so you let him keep them.

But it’s very concerning when he spends hours at a time just stroking the pup's blankets and staring at nothing.

So, you decide to take Neji on a walk to get him out of the house. It would be his first time leaving the house since the funeral.

You go at night time, because Neji is still refusing any contact with anyone he knows and this way he’s less likely to be confronted when he isn’t ready for it. To make extra sure that you can be alone, you decide to walk around the edge of the woods around one of the quieter training grounds.

Neji doesn’t speak much, but he doesn’t whine or cry either, and the night air brings a little colour to his cheeks, and you’re so happy at the small improvements. It doesn’t matter how long it ends up taking him to feel better, you’ll be here with him the whole way.

…

“I was thinking about cooking something special next week,” you make idle conversation, not expecting Neji to reply. “It’s our anniversary after all, do you have any preference?”

Neji stops walking suddenly. His shoulders are tense.

“Neji?”

He hushes you harshly.

“I can hear…”

Without another word of warning, Neji makes his way a little further into the trees. You follow him, confused and worried.

“Byakugan!” he calls, scanning the area. He gasps as he scans over a nearby bush and immediately he drops to his knees beside it.

“Neji?” you ask, now more than a little concerned. “What is it? What’s wrong?”

You watch as Neji pulls something out of the bush. He turns around with a bundle in his arms.

“It’s a pup,” Neji says, obviously shocked. You can’t blame him, you’re feeling more than a little shocked yourself. What on earth was a pup doing out here? “They’re freezing. Give me your jacket.”

Without hesitance, you quickly slip your jacket of and hand it to Neji who promptly bundles up the pup in it and brings them to his chest. The pup is making small whimpering noises that had been almost impossible to hear over the wind. Neji must have hear them, thank goodness.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you,” Neji coos to the pup. “You’re safe now, I'll take you home and make it better, I promise.”

“We need to get them to the hospital asap," you say, shaking your head. "They must be freezing and they look underweight as well. We’re not mednin, Neji.”

“Our home is closer.”

“Neji…”

“We need to make sure they’re warm,” he argues. “We can bring them home and alert a medic to make a home visit.”

You look at the earnest look on his face and know that he won’t back down, and now isn’t a time for arguments anyway.

“Okay,” you swallow nervously. “We’ll bring them home.”

…

You bring the pup back to your home and before you can protest, Neji brings them into his nest with a mumbled ‘they’ll be warm in there’.

Neji bundles himself and the pup up in the corner of the nest, turning on a little heater beside him, and tucking the pup into his shirt to share body warmth.

“We’ll get you nice and warm, it’s okay, you’re safe, I won’t let anyone harm you,” he whispers while stroking their cheek with a finger. The pup wriggles around, already looking more energetic, and starts mouthing at Neji’s chest.

“Are you hungry?” Neji laughs softly before turning to you. “Go and heat up a bottle for the pup, all the supplies are in the… the nursery.”

You nod dumbly and do as you’re asked, astounded at how much life is in Neji’s eyes. It’s the most life you’ve seen from him in months. But you can’t help but worry. What if Neji gets attached and you can’t keep the pup? Of course, you want nothing more than to keep the baby, it almost seems too good to be true that she literally fell into both your lives at this trying time, but what if it is too good to be true? What if they’re sick? Or their parents are looking for them? Or… something else. Neji doesn’t deserve another heartbreak, and you don’t want to destroy the small amount of progress he’s made in the last month.

But for now, all you can do is heat up the bottle.

…

“Here, it’s a good temperature, I already checked,” you pass Neji the bottle. He checks it again anyway and you can’t help but smile at how overprotective and parental he's being. It's so bittersweet to see him like this.

“Here you go sweetheart, just for you,” Neji smiles, cradling the pup as they latch onto the bottle with fervour. “Shh, shh, shh, slow down, it’s not going anywhere.”

Neji feeds the pup and then burps them, and you pretend you can’t see him smiling when he notices that they are starting to smell like him. You need to know you can keep her before you let him get even more attached.

“I’m going to send a clone for a medic, now.”

The room became tense all at once.

“They’re fine, I’m looking after them,” Neji protests.

“I know, and you’re doing a good job, but we still need a medic, Neji.”

Neji holds the pup more tightly to his chest, tucking an extra blanket around them. He's using the special blanket you had got commissioned for your pup. You can feel your heart break at the sight. He's already attached. Now you just have to hope you can keep them. For his sake.

“I don’t want them to take the pup away like last time,” Neji admits softly. "I can look after them, I won't let anything happen like last time, I promise. They'll be safe, we don't need a medic."

“We need to know their primary and secondary gender, omega, and we need to make sure they aren’t sick after being left in the woods…”

Neji hesitates but nods his consent in the end after you explain that your pup could become ill if left untreated. You don’t tell him that you are also sending a clone to the Hokage. Naruto will be able to grant you and Neji the right to keep the pup, and you hope that as Neji’s friend, he’ll be able to see how much he needs this.

…

You have to move Neji and the pup downstairs to wait for the medic, because Neji would not appreciate someone unknown seeing his nest he made for his pup. He’s not expecting Naruto to show up as well so you go to the door to intercept and prep them both.

“Thank you so much for coming, Naruto, I can’t tell you how much this means to me and Neji,” you say, hugging him as he walks through the door.

“I’m going to do everything I can,” he promises. “If the medic finds signs of long-term neglect, I can take the parental rights away from the biological parents straight away, even if I don't know who they are, and transfer you the rights.”

Your face visibly brightens, but Naruto continues.

“But if the only injuries are from laying in the forest for a few hours, I’ll have to try and find the parents first, because the child may have been taken from them by force, when the pup was otherwise a healthy baby being looked after sufficiently. In that circumstance, I’ll have to take the child back with me and put them in foster care until a three-month window has passed. And if the parents are found…”

“I know,” you sigh. “Let’s just get this done as soon as possible.”

The three of you walk into the living to see Neji cradling the pup tightly against his chest.

“Hey Neji,” Naruto greets softly with a sad smile. “I haven’t seen you around for a while.”

Neji tenses upon seeing Naruto.

“Naruto? Why are you here?” Neji clearly misinterprets the situation, holding the pup even more tightly and turning accusatory eyes against you. “Why did you bring him here?”

“I’m here to determine whether the pup was abandoned or kidnapped to the best of my abilities, once we have that done, we can decide how things are going to happen, okay?”

“How do you decide that?” Neji asks with distrustful eyes.

“The medic will give them a check-up, completely routine, I promise,” Naruto speaks with a soft voice like he’s talking to a cornered animal. Well, you look at Neji for a moment who is coiled as tightly as spring, he’s not far off.

It takes about five minutes for you to convince Neji to let go of the pup and hand them to the mednin, and then the next fifteen minutes involve you holding him in your arms to stop him wrestling the pup back from the mednin.

And then, rather ominously, the mednin pulls Naruto aside to talk.

Neji is shaking in your arms.

“It’s okay, calm down, Neji,” you try to comfort him.

“I can’t-“ Neji chokes, hands fisting in your shirt. “He has our pup, you let them take our pup.”

You don’t bother to correct him on his use of ‘our’, knowing it would only upset him more.

“I know baby, but they need to see that they’re healthy, nothing’s wrong, just breathe.”

Neji doesn’t take your advice.

"Last time they took them-"

"This isn't like last time, omega. Come one, try and settle down a little, that's it."

...

Naruto eventually walks back in, holding the pup securely, the mednin nowhere to be seen.

“So,” Naruto says seriously. And then his face breaks out into a wide grin. “Am I right in thinking you want to adopt?”

You can almost feel your relief in the air. Thanking every power that be for this stroke of luck. Losing this pup could have easily meant losing your mate, and the gravity of the situation all comes crashing down at once. Neji looks as though he is feeling much the same.

“Give me them,” he orders, arms out.

“Her,” Naruto corrects. “The mednin said she’s a female alpha.”

Tears start welling up in Neji’s eyes as he takes her. Their bio pup was a female alpha, too.

“Thank you,” he whispers to no one, holding his new pup as tightly as he dared. “I’ve got you now, you’re safe and sound with me, I won’t let anything hurt you ever again.”

Naruto slips out of the house without a fuss, dropping the mednin’s recommendations for feeding the underweight pup on the coffee table.

...

You and Neji take your new pup upstairs and bundle her back into the nest. Neji lays down with her, stroking her cheek as he watches her sleep.

“You need to get some rest too, omega,” you suggest, running a hand down Neji’s back.

“Guard?” he asks in response.

“Yes," you smile at his protective instincts. "I’ll guard the nest while you sleep, I promise.”

“Okay, alpha…” Neji settles down, still with one hand resting on the pup. “But if I don’t wake up when she cries, wake me… I want to be the one to feed her.”

You laugh gently, “Of course, now get some sleep. I’ll guard you both.”

[365daysofsasuhina]

[ 365 Days of SasuHina || Day Three Hundred Forty-One: A Cave ] [ Uchiha Sasuke, Hyūga Hinata, Uchiha Itachi, Uchiha Shisui, Hyūga Neji, Hyūga Hanabi ] [ SasuHina, death ] [ Verse: Then It All Went Wrong ] [ AO3 Link ]

They’ve been running for hours.

The fires of the Uchiha compound are long behind them, running atop the surface of the Naka northward. Sasuke still clings to his brother’s back, Hinata atop Shisui’s as Hanabi is slung to his chest. Neji, despite his youth, has little choice but to run.

It all still feels...unreal.

The only two among them truly privy to the goings-on are Itachi and Shisui, both aware of the Uchiha clan’s struggles against Konoha. Since the Kyūbi’s attack only a few months after Sasuke’s birth, the old prejudices against them - fanned by their prior leader - were flared once again. Surveillance was increased, their rights subtly squeezed and redacted...and when they protested, it only got worse.

Fugaku’s months of attempts of compromises were all in vain. No matter his offers, his pleads, he was ignored. So, he went to the only person he felt he had left to ask for aid:

Hyūga Hiashi, the clan head of the other dōjutsu line of Konoha, and a distant brother.

Of course, Hiashi had balked at first, not wanting to be dragged into such an affair. But Fugaku had leverage. Their common roots, and the need for a scapegoat meant that it just might be the Hyūga next once the Uchiha were...removed. All he wanted was support - an ally to help him appeal to Konoha...and stand with them should the village strike.

And strike it did.

The battle had broken out at both compounds with perfect synchronicity, cutting the allied clans off from one another as they each fought their own battles. They had expected as much...but only barely. Plans to send the heirs and their seconds - the siblings, and their first cousins - to safety had been one of the first plans Hiashi and Fugaku made, both wanting to ensure the survival of their children and blood.

But the addendum to have adults accompany them fell through. The Hyūgas’ handmaid had been killed while ushering them out, buying them time to escape to their meeting place by the Naka. And Shisui’s mother - Mikoto’s sister - made a similar sacrifice.

Now six children face the wilderness alone, unsure if they’re yet being pursued by the place they once called home: the eldest fifteen, and the youngest not even yet two.

But Shisui is a tokubetsu jōnin, and Itachi an ANBU officer. Between the two of them, they’re certain they can keep the younger ones safe...so long as they aren’t met with a force too numerous.

What they need now, however, is a place to hide, and to rest.

“Any ideas?” Itachi asks as they run, giving his cousin a glance.

“Not particularly...they probably figure we’re following the river. It’ll make tracking us by foot impossible, and by scent difficult. We can’t really stray from it for that reason...but if we’re going to stop, that means getting off the water...and leaving a trail.”

“Even if we take the trees…?”

“Our scents will linger better. But after being up all day and now running half the night with additional weight...you and I need to rest. And the kids, too.”

Itachi can’t help but feel a bit of irony at the separation between them and the ‘kids’.

He and Shisui can’t be kids anymore.

...they haven’t really been for quite some time.

“Aniki…” Sasuke murmurs. “I’m tired…”

“...I know,” he replies through grit teeth, trying to think of a solution. They’re still over a day’s trek from the place Fugaku marked on their map...they have to stop before they get there. Even if they were going on a full night’s sleep, it’d be pushing it.

“Hey, Itachi…”

“Yes?”

“How’s your geographical genjutsu?”

The younger cousin blinks. “...why do you ask?”

“There’s a cave, up ahead. Maybe we can cast an illusion to hide the opening.”

Following Shisui’s gaze, Itachi brightens. There’s just a hint of a crack in the cliff that lines the Naka to their right. “...I can handle that.”

“Good. Let’s see if it’s worth it…” Veering, Shisui approaches, a hand feeling the rock. A hint of flame is blown into a hand, chakra sustaining it over his palm and lighting the space within.

“...what do you see?”

“This should work. It’s a tight fit to get in, but there’s a chamber...eh, ten paces wide? Enough to rest, anyway. We’ll have to get cozy, but it should work.”

“Very well.”

They pack the four younger children in, all of them looking to the pair with fear and uncertainty in their eyes.

“...all right. You all stay here. Don’t make any noise if you can help it. I know the baby’s gonna be fussy, but just...try your best. We’ll go scout and see if we can find some food. And a way to get water,” Shisui offers, half thinking aloud.

The elder three all nod solemnly, Hinata doing her best to keep her baby sister quiet.

Once back outside, Shisui sighs. “...all right...I’ll head back south a little ways, start looking for any signs we’re being followed. You stay here, start working on supplies. We all need to eat and rehydrate...and sleep, if we’re able. If I see anything, I’ll send a crow. Be ready.”

“Of course.” With that, Itachi turns to the cave entrance. Dark eyes flare red, and the sight seems to blur and stretch...until it’s nothing but a solid wall.

“Perfect. You and I can see through it, of course...but I doubt anyone else can, unless they have a damn good sensor with them. Don’t stray far - I’ll come back in an hour if nothing shows up.”

Itachi just nods, watching his cousin flicker away. Mind forced into a mission state, he begins doing as ordered. A stick sharpened with a kunai manages to spear several fish, which he cooks quickly and without smoke with some katon. Water he brings into a canteen, using what he knows of suiton to filter out any bacteria or microbes. When a pause reveals no crows in the sky, he retreats into the cave.

To his surprise, the four are closely huddled together. Neji seems to lean against Hinata protectively, Byakugan active as he too scouts for danger in his own way. He stares at Itachi, unblinking. Sasuke is on Hinata’s other side, looking a bit less familiar, but close nonetheless.

“Here...eat these,” Itachi offers, handing them the skewered fish. “Be mindful of bones.”

“W-what about Hanabi?” Hinata questions quietly.

“I’ll mash some, see if we can get her to eat it...do you know her diet?”

The elder sister shakes her head. “N...no.”

“That’s all right.” By now, he’s also forgotten what Sasuke could and would eat at that age. They’ll just have to make due. Eating his own catch, he then uses his hands to carefully debone and soften a few pieces of fish. “Here...best you try. She might fuss with a stranger.”

Hinata nods, accepting the food and trying to get her sister to eat. “Hanabi...please…”

Jaw clenched with a whine, the girl makes to refuse. “Nn!”

“Try miming eating it first. She might want to mimic you.” He remembers his mother doing something similar.

Listening, Hinata then tries again. “Mm,” she hums, mocking eating. “This is r-really good!”

Hanabi’s expression wavers, then shifts to a pout. “Ah, ah…!” Little hands reach, and Hinata offers it again. This time she takes some into her mouth, moving it around and managing to swallow some.

They all sigh in relief. “Here...some water, too,” he offers, watching them pass the canteen around.

“Aniki, where are we going…?” Sasuke then asks.

“...I don’t know. Someplace our father thought suitable. North, in the mountains.”

“An Uchiha outpost…?”

“It’s possible…?” Itachi knows most of their clan’s history, and he doesn’t remember such a fort. But maybe he missed something.

“Coming in!”

Glancing up, Itachi watches as Shisui fades through the illusion. “Anything?”

“Not yet...but best we take turns guarding.”

“Agreed.” He hands Shisui some food, which the elder gratefully accepts.

“How are things here?”

“We got the baby to eat a bit. The rest of us are doing the same.”

“Good...you mind taking first watch?”

“Not at all. I’m not too tired.” His body is weary, but his mind still sharp.

“Thanks...packing two kiddos is a bit much, honestly. Especially at that pace.”

“I agree. Don’t worry - I’ll keep watch.”

Once all the food is gone, water drank, and those needing it relieved outside, they arrange themselves for the remainder of the night. Shisui props himself next to Sasuke, still beside Hinata with Neji on her other flank.

“How you holding up, Sasuke?”

He doesn’t really reply.

In truth, Shisui hardly expects him to be well. Their entire clan is likely dead by now, or if any survived, scattered to the four winds...as the Hyūga will also be. It’s not easy...and it’s only his current object that keeps him grounded. “...it’s gonna be all right. We’re still alive. I know it isn’t easy...it hurts. But the important thing is now that we keep moving. We can’t let what our parents gave up for us be for nothing...okay?”

Tearing up a bit, Sasuke manages a nod, looking up to his brother. Itachi stares through the illusion with his Sharingan, a kunai kept gripped in one hand.

“...are they dead, Shisui?”

“...I don’t know for sure, Sasuke. Maybe some got out. We might never know, but...we can hope. For now...we have our mission your father gave us. And all good shinobi follow the mission, right?”

“...right.”

“...we’ll be okay. Maybe not today, or tomorrow...but we will. All of us. For now...we rely on each other. Keep each other safe. Got it?”

All three conscious kids nod, Hanabi thankfully asleep.

“T...thank you, Shisui-san,” Hinata murmurs.

“No need for honorifics, Hinata-chan. We’re all in this together. We’re all equal and familiar now, right?”

“...right…”

Smiling wearily, Shisui then sighs, doing his best to settle down and get some rest.

Watching him for a moment, Sasuke then glances to his other neighbor. “...Hinata-chan…?”

“Yeah?”

“...I’m scared.”

“Me...me too. But...Neji-nīsan, and Shisui-san, a-and Itachi-san will protect us. Right?”

“...yeah…”

Seeing him look unsure, Hinata wriggles one hand free from her sister, offering it palm-up.

After a pause, Sasuke gently takes it with one of his own.

“...w-we aren’t alone, Sasuke-kun. At least...a-at least we have each other, ne?”

“...yeah.”

                                                               .oOo.

     (This is a sequel to day 99!)       ...I think this is the longest gap between updates so far xD Over 200 days since the first 'part' of this was published, holy smokes! And I still ADORE this concept. This is...a little rushed, what with it being a daily (and me being sick and a holiday tomorrow, woo). But I like the overall idea a lot, and I think it's one I'll revamp / continue after the challenge (and my break lol).      I just...really love these kiddos, and this AU! They're arguably all among my top ten characters, so getting to write them all together is neat, and the setting and plot is one I'm really liking. So here's hoping making it a fuller fic will work! I have a few ideas already, ahaha~      BUT for now...it's very late, I'm very tired, and tomorrow will be a VERY long day. So I'll call it here. Thanks for reading!

[narutxuzumaki]

And We Are Possessed

There’s a part of her, the hollow aching space in her that is relieved that there will be no Perseo when she dies. Perseo will burst into a great cloud of gold Dust and return back to the stars and there will just be her. Her to reckon with her mistakes and her demons and everything that exists in between. It is a hollow victory but it is victory still and it is hers. No one, not even her own daemon would ever be able to take that away from her. 

The makings and breakings of Hinata Hyuga in seven parts

When Hinata is young before she really understands life and daemons and the taboo of this, she asks what her mother’s name is. No, not her mother’s name, she knows that but her name, him. 

Her mother is steel always and she doesn’t flinch at her question. Her mother never flinches, even when she asks for more than she deserves and Hinata has always wanted more.

“Kahikina,” her mother says. Her mother’s robin -- no, Kahikina -- flutters down from her mother’s shoulder and settles by her knee. Her lap is full of her own daemon, Perseo and her hands buried into his fur are the only things that stop her from reaching out to the dainty little daemon. You’re supposed to hold tight to your soul but it's hard to think that when Kahikina brushes gently against her knee and that one touch is everything that she has always known her mother to be. Warm and loving and gentle and she only hopes that she and her mother’s souls are made of the same thing.

Perseo’s paw moves close to the other daemon and Kahikina hops straight onto it just as her mother brushes a strand of hair out of her face. “What does the name mean?” She asks and her mum, her mum, not Hiashi’s wife or Hyuga-sama or her mother, gives her that smile. That one that is just for her, the one that tells her that she loves her with all of her heart. It makes her heart swell so much that she’s certain that it's all just going to burst and years later this will be how she will always try to remember her mum. Surrounded by the flowers, mud smudged on her face and her daemon so close that she can feel his warmth. Years later she will try and remember that she was loved. She won’t remember how her mother’s eyes looked so sad, how scared she was. She won’t remember how everything still hurt, even then. 

“It means the coming, my father named me.” Her mum speaks as if she’s speaking some great secret that is only for the four of them. Her and Perseo lean forward because even though they do not yet know it, something in their bones says that this will be the last secret they ever get. Hinata will never find out that her mother’s daemon settled when the ground disappeared under her feet and her stomach lurched when she discovered it would be the oldest of the Hyuga twin’s that she would wed. Will never find out how her mother has a little vial of poison hidden away in her sleeve and that freedom tastes a little like blood and cyanide. All she will have is her half-written memories and the half-written person it leaves her with.

“And my name? What does it mean?” Her mother stiffens at the barrage of questions even though her voice is always always soft.

“It means great strength. Your father named you that.” Her mother’s voice is curt and hard and she bows under the weight of all the things she doesn’t yet understand. 

Hinata knows that she loves her sister with her entire heart. She knows it as easily as she knows that she has ten fingers and ten toes. Hanabi is only small but she is so easy to love. Even though her lungs are big enough to bring the whole compound down and do so many many times. She never cries when she’s with her though. She only stares up at her with her big Hyuga eyes and she knows, she just knows that little Hanabi is trying to speak to her with them.

Hanabi is only a baby but she says more than most people. She asks about the flowers and the loud orange boy that she’s taken to watching and mother all just with her eyes. She knows that she asks Perseo to settle into different shapes because she always seems to coo when she shifts into a butterfly and then laughs when he becomes a hummingbird, bright and fast in all the ways that she knows that she can’t be. Perseo once shifts into a small brown mouse and settles on Hanabi’s stomach because they know that she will find the feeling funny and they love her enough to do this for her.

The feeling of Perseo touching Hanabi is strange but Hinata has always been good at pushing past pain. She brushes her fingers through Hanabi’s soft hair, presses a kiss to her forehead cause healing is just a kiss away.

“Hinata! You should be in bed.” She spins around so fast that she nearly trips, catching herself on the crib. Perseo crawls out of the cot and scampers all the way up her arm until he’s nestled into the crook of her shoulder. Hanabi gives a little cry of dismay but she turns slightly so she can brush fingertips over Hanabi’s hand. Healing is only a kiss away she tries to tell Hanabi with just a touch. She thinks she must understand cause Hanabi is clever and she settles.

“Well?” Her mother’s voice is harsh and impatient and tired. Nothing at all like the calm and gentle woman she loves, she thinks, frowning.

“Mama, I heard Hanabi crying.” All the hard lines on her mother face soften until she’s just soft curves. It’s not quite her mother’s usual face but in the shadows of her lines, she catches shades of the women that she loves.

“You shouldn’t do that. Go to bed now.” She nods reluctantly and pulls away from Hanabi.

“Night mama. Night Hanabi.”She walks over to where her mother is, standing still and silent.

“Hinata wait,” her mother calls out and she stops and turns. “You’re a good sister but there may come a time where you may have to protect your sister over yourself. You don’t deserve a cage and neither does your sister but you were mine first and I would ask that you choose yourself first. Promise me that you will. Promise me!” Her mother’s words are half-stringed thoughts that don’t make any sense. Kahikina is staring at her in a way that he has never done before as if there’s not enough time in the world and nowhere to run. It is the first time that he has ever looked caged and Perseo’s tiny claws dig sharply painfully into her shoulder. Hurting in a way that it isn’t meant to with your daemon.

“Promise,” she says and it is all lie cause she would never let Hanabi get hurt. Her mother just nods, perfunctory and sharp and turns away, closing all conversation. She goes back to her room confused and scared and Perseo scuttles off her shoulder and jumps onto the bed. By the time she’s undressed, he’s shifted into his usual cat form. She half-wonders if this is what he’ll settle into when its time. It's a stupid thought, Hyuga’s only settle into birds.

“She’s silly if she thinks we’d ever let anything happen to Hanabi,” Perseo says this slowly with all the soft force that she wishes came more easily to her. Her hands form into tight fists but she only shakes her head.

“Don’t talk about mother like that,” she says softly but Perseo only sniffs. She turns away from him because it's best that she doesn’t acknowledge how strange their relationship is. She can’t look back and think that maybe there’s a chance that Perseo doesn’t like her and she doesn’t like him. She’s young enough and strung up enough with enough dreams and hopes to not realise that won’t be the worst thing about her

She sees everything but the actual death. She sees the straggle of people surrounding the river bank and her father in the river soaked to the bone as he tries to drag something out. She sees her mum, her mum laid out on the bank, this wonderful wonderful woman, who is every song that she knows and the first face she sees when she thinks of love and her heart, soaked and still and so pale. She sees Ko who holds her face between his hands and is shaking and desperate, “Don’t look Hinata-sama. Don’t look!” His voice is a harsh bark but she knows that he is scared. She wants to tell him not to be scared because this is the river that she and mother went swimming on the other day and she’s going to get up. Just wait, her mother is going to get up. She wouldn’t leave her. Not ever because she had promised between every kiss goodnight and her mother had never, would never break that.

No, she doesn’t see her mother die. But she sees her daemon burst into gold dust. She hears a wail echo all through the compound as Ko drags her away. She feels something that is vital break.

This in many many ways is much much worse.

She won’t ever be able to scrub the memory of her mum’s daemon bursting into a million particles of gold dust. Not for as long as she lives. She’ll never ever forget. Not even if she grows old and blind.   

Perseo’s scream is terrifyingly human. It could be her own voice which is stupid because Perseo is her soul. He’s her soul in the way that her mama will never have hers. It is that thought that makes her cry. It is that thought that makes her eyes burn something unbearable. It is that thought that allows her to see her father covering her mother with a cloak and makes Ko gasp. Ko’s grey parrot shifts on his shoulder and she can see that too.

She can see everything, every unbearable ugly detail.

Her mother is gone.

And her mother is gone.

“Hinata-sama, your eyes.” She lifts her hands to her eyes and feels engorged veins. Perseo who is twined around her arm tastes a tear. He spits the taste out quickly because tears taste awful and grief is even worse.

Much later, her father will come into her room, still soaked from the river and heavy from the weight of his wife’s body. “You did well today activating your byakugan. You should be proud.” Her father places a heavy hand on her shoulder and she will feel the weight of an entire clan through that touch alone. It would be the last time she would ever get a compliment from him. It would, however, not be the last time she would feel the weight of his expectations.