#but idk i always thought it was kinda odd? bc his tone of voice is that of someone who sounds like they might be complaining

[forestofmemories]

you don’t seem that annoyed about having to discuss theories with your “researcher colleagues” though👀

uh huh

“fellow researcher” UH HUH

[goldenhour-goldenboy]

You know the scene in the Notebook were Noah tell Ally "I want you. Always a forever, all of you" or something like that. Could you write something with that for Will and his S/O?

So, two things first:

1. I haven’t seen the notebook (I know, I know) and I only know like the basic plot a bit, kinda and had to hop over to youtube to watch the scene, which wasn’t that .. it’s not like it’s bad or anything, you know? Just, those kinda movies are mostly way too dramatic for me sooooo … But I liked it. I liked it enough that I can picture it with Will and that’s all that matters and if it’s your fav movie that’s fine as well :) Just putting it out there that I have never seen it from start to finish and therefore please don’t come for me if it’s not “like in the movie”.

2) Because the last Will thing I wrote got an incredible amount of feedback (thank you so much for that, I highly appreciate it!) I mixed the requests for a second part together with this one bc … it worked? Idk it seemed like a good opportunity, lol.

3) This got incredibly long, so I’ve put the rest under the cut :)

Part One | Part Two

It’s odd, you think. All of this is very, very odd to you and doesn’t feel real in the slightest. The noise of the other guests just fade off into the background, suddenly you don’t feel the cold glass of champagne in your hands an, miss the pointe of a joke you weren’t listening to in the first place. All your eyes can focus on is Will across the garden, starring back at you.

It’s odd and you think to yourself you’ve never seen him like this, never expected to have to. Will looks … well, he’s Will so the word ‘thin’ doesn’t feel right but he certainly doesn’t look healthy, he doesn’t look right. You can’t really put your finger on it for a moment. It’s not the weight, he still holds himself up high, shoulder’s square in a tension that he’ll probably never quite get rid off, to deeply impregnated in his mind from the years and years of physical training. It’s not his eyes, shocked yet totally focused on you over the yard, completely ignoring the host and her husband, still grasping the lightly blue package of a present in his hands - his hands. 

The memories come rushing back before you get to draw a sharp breath, slapping you in the face with little details you’ve thought you’ve forgotten about him, how he likes this one cup because it just the right size for him his big fingers to curl around it to warm up in the morning. How gentle his knuckles brushed over your cheek, how he used this one balm for his constantly dry skin that smelled like, like - the lost memory jerks you back into reality, back to Will who’s still looking at you and the chatter of people around you. 

You blink. It feels as if the world takes a deep breath, inhaling, slowing everything around you down to an almost freeze - before slamming you back into your body. Suddenly you’re aware of the noise and the people around you, every inch of your body on fire and before you know it you’re putting as much distance between you and Will as you possibly can - Will, who’s gripping the baby blue gift so tightly he crunches up the wrapping on the edges. You’re almost at your car, parked on the street out front, when you hear someone following you down the narrow driveway but you keep walking. You don’t want to hear it. Whatever he has to say, you decide, he can keep it to himself. 

“Maybe he’s sorry.” A tiny part of you pipes up and you thrust your hand into your bag so hard, searching blindly for your keys, you tear your skin on something sharp. A string of curses leave your lips just as Will starts to speak.

“Y/N - ” 

“Safe it.” Your head moves on instinct in his direction but you avert your eyes immediately, barely a glance with hard eyes and an even harder face. 

“I just - “

“No.”

His voice drops to the calming tone that used to work wonders. Now it makes you furious. “Just let me -”

“I really don’t want to hear it, Will.” His name slips out in an angry rush before you can think about it and you instantly regret it. His face changes.

“Look, I didn’t want this to happen and I know it’s not fair, but -”

“No.” You put as much force into word it feels strong enough to stop a herd of wild bulls. Something inside you shifts and your barely kept composure crumbles. You explode. “No! None of all of this is fair and it’s not going to get any better so would you just - “You take a shaky breath, trying to lower your voice before you yell down the whole neighborhood.” - just leave me be.”

“I didn’t want to hurt you.” You feel as if you’re back in the damn kitchen.

“But you did, William. You broke my fucking heart and I’m the one who’s left to pick up the pieces you caused! It took me weeks to get myself off the ground so please, just leave me be and excuse me if I don’t want to be in your presence right now.” 

“I’m leaving.” He offers and you can see it in his eyes he’s desperate to grasp anything that he’s able to do. “I’m leaving and you can go back and everything’s going to be fine.”

“No need, I’m not in the mood for a party anymore.” 

Nothing follows. You know he’s still behind you, hands probably rubbing the back of his neck in a nervous habit. A part of you doesn’t care that he’s still standing there, waiting. A part of you does. A part of you wonders why he’s hovering all of the sudden. Will was never the one to push you when you told him to stop but now his presence is overbearing with something unspoken. Your hand hovers over the car door.

“I didn’t know you were coming.” 

You fumble with your keys. “Yeah, well. Hannah’s been my friend for six years, of course I’d come to her - “ the word engagement gets stuck in your throat, it feels slimy on the back of your tongue. ” celebration.” 

A painful expression settles over Will’s face, as if you’ve physically taken a step forward and slapped him. You surprised to not find any guilt about your words hurting him as you reach inside yourself and listen. This has been cooking inside you for a while.

“I don’t want to ruin this for you.” Will swallows, his voice becoming calm. The smoother he gets, the more angrier you get. “I don’t want you to leave because of me.” 

You scoff. “You didn’t mind me leaving the house a few months ago.”

Another slap to Will’s face. You can see his jaw work, teeth grinding from suppressed emotions. You hope there’s guilt involved in the mix. “Y/N…”

“Don’t.” You draw a deep breath. “Just … let me go.” This time you bite your tongue before another snappy remark makes it past your lips. 

“It hurts me as well.”

“I doubt that.” You mouth tastes bitter. “And I truly don’t care.” 

“I think I’ve made a mistake.”

You freeze. Keys in hand, eyes on the hood of your car, you freeze. 

Will breaths out and repeats. “I think I’ve made a big fucking mistake.”

You’re sure you grip the door so hard it has your fingers imprinted on the door for forever now. Thoughts rush through your head, an insane amount of questions but none of them make it past your lips. Will takes you not taking off immediately as enough encouragement to continue on.

“I was a fucking idiot that week and I … I got inside my head and somehow convinced myself that this. “He gestures between you and him. “Couldn’t work and I got - I was so sure we’d just end up hurting each other. I really thought I was doing the right thing but ever since that night it just … it doesn’t feel right anymore.” A rasp makes it’s way into Will’s voice and now your eyes sneak back to him. “Nothing feels right anymore. I thought this was wanted I wanted but … it’s not. It’s just not.” He takes another breath. “It’s you, it’s always been you. I know I fucked up, I know that now and I’m sorry. I did this terrible thing to you, to us and I can’t take it back. I just wish I …” He stops. There’s nothing more to say.

It feels like someone dunked you underwater, the flood of information simply being too much for you to comprehend. You can’t help blow out a breathy, unbelieving laugh. “What am I supposed to do with that now?” You’re eyes look around the driveway helplessly. “What the fuck do I do with that, Will?”

“I just wanted you to know. Maybe to know that I’m just as fucked up from this.” Will’s face has softened, his breathing coming back to normal and although doubt still lingers at the back of your mind he somewhat looks relieved. “It’s all.” 

He’s stretching his limit and he knows it. His words echo in your head, over and over again like an avalanche rushing down your body and ripping off every band aid you’ve so carefully applied in the last couple of weeks, feelings purring out of the cut as you still stare at him. Will retaliates quickly before you work yourself into another moment of panic, taking one calculated step forward with his eyes steady on you.

“This is all, I promise. I will leave you now, you can go back to the party or go home and we’ll never speak of it again.” The thought, weirdly enough, turns your spine to ice.” But if you don’t want that, if there’s some part that’s still not done and doesn’t hate me completely …. then let me call you.” He studies your face, letting his words sink in for a moment before speaking up again. “I’m in town till the end of next week. And then again in a few weeks. Whenever you like.”

 And there he is - the William Miller you’ve known for years, who just knows that this is as much as you can take for one night, who gives you time and space because it’s what he does, always suggesting, rarely pushing. His voice gets low and gentle, sliding over to you and cradles you in that warmth you’ve been so used to. His eyes are searching your face for any sign at all, eyes underneath thick lashes you remember so well.

“I’ve changed my number.” You mumble but even to your ears it sounds more like an excuse. 

A small smile slips onto Will’s face and you think this is the last straw for you, before your knees buckle and give out but he wipes it off a second later. “Yeah, i’ve noticed that.” His hand slides to the inside of his jacket and he offers you his phone. 

You stare at it. The sentence stirs something inside you, a tiny spot glowing in your chest, warm and … hopeful. You grab Will’s phone from his out stretched hand and punch your digits into the phone before it has the chance to grow into something more. As you hand it back your fingers brush against his palm and this time you have to bite your cheek to ignore the stirring.

It’s odd, you think pulling out and looking into the review mirror one last time, how you can be angry at him this much and still hope he calls.  

[goldenhour-goldenboy]

The Break Up (pt.2)

(repost bc dumblr loves to do me like that and shit ain’t showing up in the tags)

primordialhandmaidan asked: You know the scene in the Notebook were Noah tell Ally "I want you. Always a forever, all of you" or something like that. Could you write something with that for Will and his S/O?

So, two things first:

1. I haven’t seen the notebook (I know, I know) and I only know like the basic plot a bit, kinda and had to hop over to youtube to watch the scene, which wasn’t that .. it’s not like it’s bad or anything, you know? Just, those kinda movies are mostly way too dramatic for me sooooo … But I liked it. I liked it enough that I can picture it with Will and that’s all that matters and if it’s your fav movie that’s fine as well :) Just putting it out there that I have never seen it from start to finish and therefore please don’t come for me if it’s not “like in the movie”.

2) Because the last Will thing I wrote got an incredible amount of feedback (thank you so much for that, I highly appreciate it!) I mixed the requests for a second part together with this one bc … it worked? Idk it seemed like a good opportunity, lol.

3) This got incredibly long, so I’ve put the rest under the cut :)

Part One | Part Two

It’s odd, you think. All of this is very, very odd to you and doesn’t feel real in the slightest. The noise of the other guests just fade off into the background, suddenly you don’t feel the cold glass of champagne in your hands an, miss the pointe of a joke you weren’t listening to in the first place. All your eyes can focus on is Will across the garden, starring back at you.

It’s odd and you think to yourself you’ve never seen him like this, never expected to have to. Will looks … well, he’s Will so the word ‘thin’ doesn’t feel right but he certainly doesn’t look healthy, he doesn’t look right. You can’t really put your finger on it for a moment. It’s not the weight, he still holds himself up high, shoulder’s square in a tension that he’ll probably never quite get rid off, to deeply impregnated in his mind from the years and years of physical training. It’s not his eyes, shocked yet totally focused on you over the yard, completely ignoring the host and her husband, still grasping the lightly blue package of a present in his hands - his hands.

The memories come rushing back before you get to draw a sharp breath, slapping you in the face with little details you’ve thought you’ve forgotten about him, how he likes this one cup because it just the right size for him his big fingers to curl around it to warm up in the morning. How gentle his knuckles brushed over your cheek, how he used this one balm for his constantly dry skin that smelled like, like - the lost memory jerks you back into reality, back to Will who’s still looking at you and the chatter of people around you.

You blink. It feels as if the world takes a deep breath, inhaling, slowing everything around you down to an almost freeze - before slamming you back into your body. Suddenly you’re aware of the noise and the people around you, every inch of your body on fire and before you know it you’re putting as much distance between you and Will as you possibly can - Will, who’s gripping the baby blue gift so tightly he crunches up the wrapping on the edges. You’re almost at your car, parked on the street out front, when you hear someone following you down the narrow driveway but you keep walking. You don’t want to hear it. Whatever he has to say, you decide, he can keep it to himself.

“Maybe he’s sorry.” A tiny part of you pipes up and you thrust your hand into your bag so hard, searching blindly for your keys, you tear your skin on something sharp. A string of curses leave your lips just as Will starts to speak.

“Y/N - ”

“Safe it.” Your head moves on instinct in his direction but you avert your eyes immediately, barely a glance with hard eyes and an even harder face.

“I just - “

“No.”

His voice drops to the calming tone that used to work wonders. Now it makes you furious. “Just let me -”

“I really don’t want to hear it, Will.” His name slips out in an angry rush before you can think about it and you instantly regret it. His face changes.

“Look, I didn’t want this to happen and I know it’s not fair, but -”

“No.” You put as much force into word it feels strong enough to stop a herd of wild bulls. Something inside you shifts and your barely kept composure crumbles. You explode. “No! None of all of this is fair and it’s not going to get any better so would you just - “You take a shaky breath, trying to lower your voice before you yell down the whole neighborhood.” - just leave me be.”

“I didn’t want to hurt you.” You feel as if you’re back in the damn kitchen.

“But you did, William. You broke my fucking heart and I’m the one who’s left to pick up the pieces you caused! It took me weeks to get myself off the ground so please, just leave me be and excuse me if I don’t want to be in your presence right now.”

“I’m leaving.” He offers and you can see it in his eyes he’s desperate to grasp anything that he’s able to do. “I’m leaving and you can go back and everything’s going to be fine.”

“No need, I’m not in the mood for a party anymore.”

Nothing follows. You know he’s still behind you, hands probably rubbing the back of his neck in a nervous habit. A part of you doesn’t care that he’s still standing there, waiting. A part of you does. A part of you wonders why he’s hovering all of the sudden. Will was never the one to push you when you told him to stop but now his presence is overbearing with something unspoken. Your hand hovers over the car door.

“I didn’t know you were coming.”

You fumble with your keys. “Yeah, well. Hannah’s been my friend for six years, of course I’d come to her - “ the word engagement gets stuck in your throat, it feels slimy on the back of your tongue. ” celebration.”

A painful expression settles over Will’s face, as if you’ve physically taken a step forward and slapped him. You surprised to not find any guilt about your words hurting him as you reach inside yourself and listen. This has been cooking inside you for a while.

“I don’t want to ruin this for you.” Will swallows, his voice becoming calm. The smoother he gets, the more angrier you get. “I don’t want you to leave because of me.”

You scoff. “You didn’t mind me leaving the house a few months ago.”

Another slap to Will’s face. You can see his jaw work, teeth grinding from suppressed emotions. You hope there’s guilt involved in the mix. “Y/N…”

“Don’t.” You draw a deep breath. “Just … let me go.” This time you bite your tongue before another snappy remark makes it past your lips.

“It hurts me as well.”

“I doubt that.” You mouth tastes bitter. “And I truly don’t care.”

“I think I’ve made a mistake.”

You freeze. Keys in hand, eyes on the hood of your car, you freeze.

Will breaths out and repeats. “I think I’ve made a big fucking mistake.”

You’re sure you grip the door so hard it has your fingers imprinted on the door for forever now. Thoughts rush through your head, an insane amount of questions but none of them make it past your lips. Will takes you not taking off immediately as enough encouragement to continue on.

“I was a fucking idiot that week and I … I got inside my head and somehow convinced myself that this. “He gestures between you and him. “Couldn’t work and I got - I was so sure we’d just end up hurting each other. I really thought I was doing the right thing but ever since that night it just … it doesn’t feel right anymore.” A rasp makes it’s way into Will’s voice and now your eyes sneak back to him. “Nothing feels right anymore. I thought this was wanted I wanted but … it’s not. It’s just not.” He takes another breath. “It’s you, it’s always been you. I know I fucked up, I know that now and I’m sorry. I did this terrible thing to you, to us and I can’t take it back. I just wish I …” He stops. There’s nothing more to say.

It feels like someone dunked you underwater, the flood of information simply being too much for you to comprehend. You can’t help blow out a breathy, unbelieving laugh. “What am I supposed to do with that now?” You’re eyes look around the driveway helplessly. “What the fuck do I do with that, Will?”

“I just wanted you to know. Maybe to know that I’m just as fucked up from this.” Will’s face has softened, his breathing coming back to normal and although doubt still lingers at the back of your mind he somewhat looks relieved. “It’s all.”

He’s stretching his limit and he knows it. His words echo in your head, over and over again like an avalanche rushing down your body and ripping off every band aid you’ve so carefully applied in the last couple of weeks, feelings purring out of the cut as you still stare at him. Will retaliates quickly before you work yourself into another moment of panic, taking one calculated step forward with his eyes steady on you.

“This is all, I promise. I will leave you now, you can go back to the party or go home and we’ll never speak of it again.” The thought, weirdly enough, turns your spine to ice.” But if you don’t want that, if there’s some part that’s still not done and doesn’t hate me completely …. then let me call you.” He studies your face, letting his words sink in for a moment before speaking up again. “I’m in town till the end of next week. And then again in a few weeks. Whenever you like.”

And there he is - the William Miller you’ve known for years, who just knows that this is as much as you can take for one night, who gives you time and space because it’s what he does, always suggesting, rarely pushing. His voice gets low and gentle, sliding over to you and cradles you in that warmth you’ve been so used to. His eyes are searching your face for any sign at all, eyes underneath thick lashes you remember so well.

“I’ve changed my number.” You mumble but even to your ears it sounds more like an excuse.

A small smile slips onto Will’s face and you think this is the last straw for you, before your knees buckle and give out but he wipes it off a second later. “Yeah, i’ve noticed that.” His hand slides to the inside of his jacket and he offers you his phone.

You stare at it. The sentence stirs something inside you, a tiny spot glowing in your chest, warm and … hopeful. You grab Will’s phone from his out stretched hand and punch your digits into the phone before it has the chance to grow into something more. As you hand it back your fingers brush against his palm and this time you have to bite your cheek to ignore the stirring.

It’s odd, you think pulling out and looking into the review mirror one last time, how you can be angry at him this much and still hope he calls.