#but i've caused them so much trouble already. i feel like i'm betraying them if i grow up.

[anaalnathrakhs]

uh oh i feel like i have a deeply maladaptative response to people knowing Literally Anything about me it's fine it's fine i'm handling it very well

[shinobus-unbreakable-spirit]

what if Yoriichi gets jealous because his s/o being flirt by other man? like, how would he react?😃

Oooooo. I've already written the opposite scenario, so it'll be interesting to see how things are from the other way around. I think I'm going to do this one in a headcanon format! I hope that works for ya~

Yoriichi as a Jealous S/O

To begin with, he wouldn't vocalize his jealousy at all. His S/O would only be able to tell he's jealous by the way he stares daggers at the other man and acts cold whenever he's brought up

It depends how assertively the man flirts. If it's ambiguous whether he's actually flirting or just being friendly, Yoriichi would let him off the hook. However, if the other man straight up hit on his S/O, he would show a shade of possessiveness by stepping in and telling the man, firmly, to never hit on them again

Generally Yoriichi controls his emotions quite well, but jealousy is one he would struggle with. His S/O would be able to tell something is off by his body language, how he shuts off at the mere mention of this other man. Then, if his S/O confronted him about it, he'd come clean about his feelings, admitting that he simply cannot stand the thought of S/O being with anyone else and he's battling these emotions every day

He would feel some guilt about his jealousy, as it makes it seem like he doesn't trust his S/O. He would reassure his S/O that he completely trusts them to be faithful, but he simply doesn't trust the man to not put his S/O in uncomfortable situations by trying to make a move on them

He would have frequent intrusive thoughts about his S/O cheating on him for this other man, and that would be what bothers him most. The idea of his S/O actually betraying his trust like that. The sheer thought of it would have him falling to the ground and folding in two, clutching at his chest. He would only be able to console himself by doing about the only thing that'd bring his mind tranquility, which is practicing his swordfighting in his garden and focusing on his breathing

If things went on long enough, he would one day tell his S/O the truth about how the other man makes him feel. It would happen quite randomly; as he and his S/O enjoy a cup of green tea together, he would tell them everything. He was usually so quiet, but he wouldn't be able to bottle his emotions up forever, so he would tell them, relaxed, without leaking an ounce of actual emotion, simply laying down the facts so that his S/O knows where his head is at

Despite how much he dislikes his S/O's relationship with this flirty other man, he wouldn't dissuade his S/O from being friends with him as he recognizes that'd be a controlling move and he doesn't want his S/O to lose out on any friends just because he's unable to control his jealousy

He'd mostly blame himself for his jealousy. However, if the man ever tried to make a move on his S/O, Yoriichi would definitely step in and scorn the man for trying to take someone who's already in a relationship, as this is a very dishonorable move and Yoriichi is all about honor. In fact, I think that's one of the things that'd bother him most of all, that the idea of someone trying to take his S/O is so dishonorable and sneaky that it makes him feel sick

Ultimately, Yoriichi would get jealous and it would hurt him, but with good communication between him and his S/O, they could work through it as his trust and devotion for his S/O would be far beyond his feelings of envy. That being said, he would step in and behave possessively if someone tried it on with his S/O ----- I hope this was a good interpretation of the situation, anon! I think Yoriichi is a really kind and reasonable man who wouldn't want to cause too much trouble for his partner, even if he was going through intense bouts of jealousy. I'm confident that he'd be committed to working things out, too. Thank you for the ask! <3

[nerendus]

Datability/Fuckability of every Bloodborne boss

You know how it is....

Cleric Beast — First boss of the game and very simple. He's quite the acrobatic, and is permanently burned into my mind whenever I walk across the bridge. He has a lovely voice that he uses to scream at me from the very beginning of the game. 7/10.

Father Gascoigne — Do I really need to say anything..... Deep voice, bloody, tall, DILF, religious man. Being able to summon him in Central Yharnam and just twirl your hair at how tall he is..... Don't worry about his wife. His wife's dead. And his children need a new mom and I've already accidentally killed them, so there is absolutely nothing in the way of our fucked up bloody romance. 10/10.

Blood-starved Beast — You know..... I'll give them points for being in one of my favourite locations (the chapel, not exactly Old Yharnam), but the poison sweeping from every orifice of their body really is a major turn off. I love their mangly and skinned look, but I would rather not die while cuddling. 4/10.

Vicar Amelia — Probably the first boss to give me genuine trouble, but I'm alright with that! She was a very beautiful human woman and became an even more beautiful Borzoi woman. Even in her transformed state, she still holds firm to her values and religion, so she would never betray me just because now she's able to scream really loud. Her friends outside really don't approve of the relationship, but there's nothing more juicier than a forbidden relationship. 8/10.

Witches of Hemick — I'm not saying yes for her, she isn't really my type (her eyes are a little...too much), but the Mad Ones in the polycule are extremely lovely and I want them to hold me in their arms and protect me from all danger. 5/10.

Shadows of Yharnam — YES! MY DUDES! Seeing three robed guys slowly creep into view from the fog is already enough to make a lass swoon, but with the added Nazgul effect of them and just the overall fact that they are Pthumerian makes me so desperately be in the middle of whatever they got going on. Don't worry, the Queen will be fine on her own, she's already dead anyhow. 10/10.

Rom, the Vacuous Spider — MILF, loyal children, loyal to the cause that made her turn into a mindless cosmic spider at the bottom of the lake. Her very tiny legs are kinda silly, and I don't really have that much attraction to her, but I think we could be besties. 4/10.

Amygdala — YES! WOMAN ALIEN MOMENT! She is seven arms of beauty. There are two particular variations that I'm obsessed with: passed the Yahar'gul Chapel lamp, there's a lass that is...extremely dangerously hanging from one of the buildings, and a few of her arms are just dangling without any purpose as she just lazily looks down at us. The other one is back up the way we came, passed The Girls, and she's just clinging to the bars over this walkway, and you can get so close to her and see her heartbeat and she just stares down at you with all her tentacles and it makes my heart blush. 100/10.

Laurence, First Vicar — His human form, even though we just hear his voice, is an automatic yes, but this isn't about him, it's about his fucked up flaming transformation version. From the moment of the boss intro, it's obvious that he's just having a bad hangover, and I feel for him! I'll get a washrag and damped the flames before giving him a full bottle of Ibuprofen (I feel like he'd need all that) and taking a cuddle break with him on the altar. 8/10.

Ludwig, the Holy Blade — Honestly....his second phase is sorta attractive, but he really just gives me dad vibes instead of husband vibes. 2/10.

This is the end of Tumblr post due to photo limit, second part will be reblogged!

[omgkalyppso]

I've mentioned this before but here's screenshots and elaboration on a moment Étoile would have needed to isolate for peace of mind.

Étoile started their journey as a Neutral Good Oath of Devotion Paladin, at which time they said, and meant, that they wouldn't sign their soul away to a devil just for physical security in relation to the mindflayer parasite. By Act 3, their oath is broken, their alignment is in flux, and their patience with the dream visitor has worn more than thin. They felt they were being used through the parasite, as any actions they took, any thoughts they had, any motivations they pursued, had to run through the filter of an ever-present ... visitor.

Raphael offered them a way out of that, and to take the source of all their troubles off of the Material Plane. They felt zero concern at the time for how the wars in the Hells progressed, and well, I didn't have Gale or Karlach in the party so I the player didn't really have anyone immediately rejecting this proposal. To top it all off, Étoile vastly liked Lae'zel over the dream visitor.

But after Étoile signed Raphael's contract, and Astarion said:

When moments, hours before:

Étoile felt very isolated — and used, and stupid, and that's probably the biggest factor in regards to when Étoile might want to be alone to recenter: when they feel foolish or incapable of intellectually or emotionally dealing with a problem.

Contrary to the screenshot expression, I think as soon as the words "what should I care" passed Astarion's lips that he saw in Étoile's expression just how much of a wrong thing to say that was. If you talk to him immediately after this, he's back to his lovey-dovey, "Yes, my dear? What is it?" So canon expects me to blow past this which means I elaborate how I like.

Étoile was already made uncomfortable by some of the phrasing in Astarion's confession (if I'm keeping it as-is) in Act 2. They could see how centered they were becoming in Astarion's (otherwise) "independence" from Cazador and general perspectives of love and life, which would cause them to question whether Astarion recognizing that if their soul is fucked that it's none of his business - is a good thing. Meanwhile also they also felt betrayed, that they are "a team" when he needs their help, but that any problems they have are not his concern. Besides all that, after everything with Wyll and then Astarion's confession of initially setting out to use them ...

Étoile wouldn't have objected to a more boundaried agreement between them, and so to still feel used now with no guarantees or understanding between them ... and to not know whether it was something Astarion had meant to do or which was an accident of habit — because a single confession and apology is generally not enough to change one's nature / comportment / attitude they've kept for centuries— It would be hard for Étoile to rationalize a response to Astarion's assertion. They would want to be left alone to think.

It isn't the next long rest, but a few days later (after Wyll's pact is broken) that I have this blocked dialogue from Étoile to Astarion's response for how it could benefit Wyll:

Étoile: He's not ready for that. To hear it, I mean. If the Council accepts him, I'm sure Wyll would be very fit to rule. Astarion: You don't make that sound very complimentary? Étoile: I'm simply … soured. Astarion: From … from before? Darling, I— Étoile. I'm sorry. For what I said. I am … unaccustomed to offering comfort or kindness, to being needed, to even recognizing what that might look like. Étoile: It's not your fault. Will you feed on me tonight? Astarion: I was hoping you'd ask. Étoile: I've been thinking about it since earlier. I thought that, if I was disposable in other circumstances, at least I could be close to you in this. It's alright. Having choice means you get to choose how things end or evolve, and I just have apprehension about being a suboptimal choice. Astarion: I've told you that I never expected to choose you, to choose this, for myself. The risks you take? The way you care for others? You wouldn't have been my first choice. But… Now you are, and I don't only follow you because it's easy. I have no wish to discard you. I need you with me. Please, forgive me? Étoile: I forgave you even when I hadn't expected you to say all that. You need me with you? You need only ask.

This would only be the fourth time in my playthrough I had Astarion feed on Étoile and it was for this fucking roleplay reason. Astarion otherwise had to live on mouthfuls obtained in combat since that was enough to give him the Happy buff.

It was also the night Leon and Aurelia come to call. Which I think is hilarious.

Reassurance is a double sided sword.

Étoile would have let him kill his siblings, they would have trusted his judgment on that. But the number of spawn was too much for them to reconcile.

[fabdante]

Got this idea from thinking about what a reboot version of Temen-ni-gru could be like. I like the idea of it maybe being a combo between rescuing Sparda from where ever Mundus banished him and the plot of DMC3, where the purpose of Temen-ni-gru is basically to seal not only a gate to the Underworld, but also the Force Edge/Sparda. Gonna focus on the latter, just because that's easier to know what to do with than reboot Sparda. Maybe you need Sparda, alive or at least out of where ever Mundus banished him to, to get the Force Edge/Devil Sword Sparda out of him?

I don't think you'd need Arkham for the reboot's version of DMC3/Temen-ni-gru, just because I think reboot Vergil could fill the role well enough himself. Maybe with some demonic armor, since he's King of Hell now?

(Maybe Kat could be involved too, helping Dante solve puzzles and navigate the tower? Assuming her magical abilities have jumped from "astral projection and seeing into Limbo" to "being able to cast Fireball", I mean. Unless you want to give her a rocket launcher. I'm more partial to giving her a Kablooey, but whichever works best for her.)

Mainly I wanna focus on character stuff- in this case, for Dante. Doppleganger the Deathvoid didn't do much as a test of character for DMC3 Dante, since preboot Dante was already kinda far enough along in his character development that he didn't need another test, but I feel like with what we see of dopplegangers in Vergil's Downfall (or whatever Hollow Vergil really was), you could have some fun with it. Especially if Vergil is here, especially if he's trying to manipulate Dante into helping him undo the seal on Temen-ni-gru and get the Force Edge/the Sparda.

The twins' amulets in the preboot don't have any kind of "security measure" (I guess you could call it) where they only respond to a certain twin, but apparently the reboot twins' amulets DO, so maybe reboot Vergil needs Dante to go along with him for whatever he's planning? At least as far as getting Dante's amulet to do what Vergil wants it to do, anyway.

I feel like you could have some fun with the blood ritual, too, in terms of like, exploring how Vergil is using his brother and how that makes Dante feel (bad; angry and hurt and betrayed, and its all the worse because/if reboot Dante really HAD hoped his brother was trying to connect with him again and make amends), and how Vergil thinks he doesn't "need" his brother/family any more because he's got more power now, and that's all that he thinks matters.

Idk, just. Mostly trying to dig into reboot Dante's character more. I keep thinking of him with issues with self-worth, like he sees himself as a tool, as something to be used (cause I mean, *gestures to Limbo City* living in a capitalistic hellscape'll do that to ya) only really good at killing demons. That and a sense of foreshortened future, since he probably thought he'd be dead from the demons by now, and even with Mundus gone, they're still probably hunting him, so he probably has trouble trying to live a "normal" life with Kat. Or at least as "normal" a life as they can have, being demon hunters and all.

Idk. What do you think?

Ok so firstly I want to say this is all really fun! I do think the plot of DMC3 ties in pretty easily into the reboot honestly and I'm surprised more people don't do anything with the concept. And I like it more then uh...the 'leaked' sequel idea that floats around every few years.

That and I always like the idea of Vergil going and finding Sparda and how it would be for Sparda to come back all these years later and see what became of his sons, given he was the one who decided to memory wipe them and separate them and everything.

My thoughts for a DmC2/reboot version of 3 are admittedly very swayed by my love of Kat/Vergil. I have jokingly referred to it as a gothic romance set in the ruins of the Order a few months after the end of the game. I've never had a full plotline for the concept but me and my girlfriend have discussed the idea of it being pretty loosely based around 3. Like there's still the tower of course, but this time around it's more Vergil's decided to come back from hell with his new demon king powers and army and stake claim and he creates a tower out of the ruins of the Order as a sort of home base which Dante and Kat then have to go through to find him. Which then would lead to a lot of fun character dynamics and tensions (also a lot more Kat being active in the plot and ideally playable at times).

I'm also curious how the fall of Limbo would impact Kat's powers. Like I imagine she still has them and they might work for other layers of hell, but I wonder if losing Limbo would like...untether her a bit and make her abilities stronger, since there's no longer that veil there between her and Limbo. Plus she can probably make stronger spells if she can get the right stuff.

[dreamifics]

Favorite Crime

James Potter x Reader

Summary: Y/N L/N and James Potter were in a relationship together, Y/N was too blind to see James Potter's intentions. Just pure angst.

Know that I loved you so bad

I let you treat me like that

I was your willing accomplice, honey

James Potter..

How would I describe him? Charming, Endearing or just a prick? He was everything I wanted, I loved him. I didn't see it back then.. How his eyes would fall on her, how he did anything just to make her smile. I never gave it much thought, I was too busy giving him heart shaped looks to notice that I was really not the one he loves but he was all I loved.

"Y/N, would you mind if we skip our date today?Lily needs some help with a few things." He asked..

"We haven't hang out with each other for weeks now.." I hinted.

"I'm sorry, but Lily needs my help."

"It's your choice, I don't own you." I answered with a frown..

"Alright, I'll see you tommorow." He still chose Lily, but I still didn't give that much a thought.

It's been weeks since me and James last hang out, just us. Today he told me he was studying in the library, but he wasn't there.. Where was he? I spotted Remus not far from me, I walked up to him.

"Hey, Remus!Did you see James anywhere?He told me he was studying in the library but he's not there.." I questioned one of his friends.

"Ohh..He didn't tell you?"

"What?" I nervously asked.

"He went to Hogsmeade with Lily.."

"Oh."

"Yeah, he didn't tell you that?" He asked..

"No!No!I think he did, I must've forgot." Maybe, I just forgotten about it..

Even though I saw the signs, I ignored it. I was innocent and inlove, every red flags I saw went down the drain. Just because I love, I let him fool me like that.

And I watched as you fled the scene

Doe-eyed as you buried me

One heart broke, four hands bloody

Quidditch practice has just ended, sweat and muscle aches was all I could feel. I'm walking back inside when I saw James waiting for me. I was delighted to see him, I felt my heart raced as our eyes meet.

"Y/N, can we talk?" My smile dropped when I sensed that this was about something serious.

"Of course!" I gave him a timid smile.

"I--Uhh, I don't know how to say this but.." He walks up to me, his eyes blank. This was not the James I knew..

"What?" I questioned unsure of how I should react.

"I'm breaking up with you.."

And just like that, I died..

"W-What?" The information refused to sinked in, my lungs suddenly collapsed as tears fell in my eyes.

"I'm sorry. " I looked him in the eyes, there were no guilt or remorse. It's like he already moved on.

"Sorry?That's all you could say?" I laugh bitterly and dry, he just moved his eyes away from me.

"I don't know what--"

"I mean, why?Is it because I'm not pretty enough?Or is it--"

"Prongs!Professor McGonagall's asking for you!" Sirius shouts from a far.

"I'm sorry Y/N, I have to go." The tears flooded down my cheeks as my heart broke to thousand of pieces. Why did he do that to me? After that day, insecurity and anxiety became my new companion.

It didn't take long for James to move on because the next week, the news of Lily and James relationship spread Hogwarts like a wild fire.

"I saw the two of them kissing when James was still with Y/N." I heard from a student, so that's the reason. He cheated, he didn't love me, he wanted Lily not me.

"I heard from Sirius that James just used Y/N to make Lily jealous." And that caught my attention, I saw my friends give me a concern look.

"Let's just go, Y/N..Don't mind them."

They pulled me away from the crowded halls and into our house common room. Did he really just use me? I felt the tears appearing on my warm eyes. It suddenly made sense, the time James and Lily went to Hogsmeade, that's when he totally changed for the worst.

"Y/N, don't you dare cry!" My friend warned me, but it was too late. The tears involuntary fell from my eyes, they couldn't help but feel pity for me. A silent sob escapes my lips, I felt my heart getting worse when I try to breathe. Insecurities seems to find it's way to my brain as my thoughts started to compare Lily to me.

James Potter killed me, not with the killing curse but with a much worser curse ever to exist..

Love..

Those things I did

Just so I could call you mine

The things you did

Well, I hope I was your favorite crime

In our relationship, I tried everything to make him stay. To refrain him from finding another. I did anything he enjoyed doing, to pulling pranks on Slytherin to skipping class to sneak out of Hogwarts. I did everything he wanted,  just so I could call him mine..

"Oh my god!Malfoy's gonna lose his sanity when he finds out that we put a charmed pink hair dye in his shampoo!" I giggled as we walk away from the Slytherin tower.

"I know!And I couldn't have done it without you, love.." James smiled cheekily at me.

And all James did was call me his but leaves once Lily showed up. He killed me, James Fleamont Potter killed me, he committed a crime, a treason. He betrayed me, he used me.. He's a criminal and I hope to Godric that I'm his favorite crime..

You used me as an alibi

I crossed my heart as you crossed the line

And I defended you to all my friends

I should've trusted my instincts, I didn't listen to my guts when it screamed inside me to not fall for James. And it turns out that it was right, James only used me as an excuse to make Lily Evans jealous.

"And if I put this king here, I would---mmm" James cut me off with a heart shaking kiss, we were in the great hall playing chess when he suddenly kissed me.

Back then I thought that it was sweet but reminiscing now, he only did that when Lily walked in. I was too busy melting in his kiss to notice it, ignorance is really a bliss.

Stupidity really runs in the course of my veins, I should've listen to my friends when they said that there was something odd with James.

"I'm telling you, Y/N..He's just using you as a distraction from his feelings to Lily!" A dear friend of mine pointed out to me.

"James is not like that, I've know him since we were little.."

"Since you know him so well, you also know his weirdly obsession with Evans!" Another dear friend of mine points out.

"Stop being like this guys, he's not like that.." I protested.

Oh, how wrong was I? James was everything they said he was, I was naive enough to defend him. See, how much I loved him.. Love is really something..

And now, every time a siren sounds

I wonder if you're around

'Cause you know that I'd do it all again

Now, it's hard to trust anyone who crosses my path. When they tell a word James once spoke, this siren suddenly blast in my mind and memories of us immediately flashes in my head.

"I like you, Y/N.." A Hufflepuff student confessed to me, I couldn't help but remember James..

"I like you, Y/N..More than I should like a friend.." James was a great pretender.

Now, trusting for me is much harder than killing. I'm afraid, because I know that it will happen again. I'm scared, because I'd do it all again. I will feel the same pain I felt when I was with him.

James Potter killed everything in me..

It's bittersweet to think about the damage that we do

'Cause I was going down, but I was doing it with you

Yeah, everything we broke, and all the trouble that we made

But I say that I hate you with a smile on my face

Oh, look what we became

The damage he did is still present to this day, because it's still embedded in the walls of mind, it still lingered in my heart. I was never happy with him, but it's nice to know that he wasn't happy with me either, we were miserable with each other, I was going down with him.

I guess, I'm also in the blame, we both committed crimes but not the same crime. We both caused damage, it's sad to think that after all the troubles we did, I don't regret anything. I hate you, but I keep saying that with a smile in my face.

Why? Because in the end, we were both in the wrong. James used me, betrayed me but I let him do it to me.. Ignored the red flags and warnings, turned a blind eye because I loved him. We both commit crimes that we both knowingly committed.

Well, I hope I was your favorite crime

Your favorite crime

Your favorite crime

'Cause baby, you were mine

James Potter was my favorite crime..

I just wrote this because I can't get this song off my head, I didn't re-read this, they might be typos or mistakes. If you guys have any request for imagines about ( marvel characters, DC characters, stranger things, game of thrones, brooklyn 99, friends, basically anything! I accept everything!)

[traincat]

I feel like I've read a ton, but I'm honestly still pretty new to comics rn. That being said... What is one more day? Ik we don't like it and it happened a while ago, but that's about it [,=

Time for Spider-Man History With Traincat: Highly Controversial Storylines! And that feeling is totally normal with comics with huge canons -- you can read a ton and still have some fairly big blindspots in your understanding of the total picture. That being said, this is kind of a big one, both in terms of Spider-Man history/canon and in terms of how Spider-Man fandom functions. I would say probably no other storyline has had quite as much impact on how the fandom views and interacts with the source material as One More Day/Brand New Day. It's been the Wild West out here ever since it happened. (Which was in 2007, so like, yes, fairly long ago, especially when you look at how Spider-Man canon has evolved since, but in the grand scheme of things, also kind of recent. One More Day is not old enough to rent a car.)

So when people talk about Spider-Man's One More Day, they're usually actually talking about two related arcs: One More Day and Brand New Day. For the sake of simplicity, I'm going to be covering both. For the sake of transparency, I am going to admit that I think One More Day, as a self-contained story, is good, actually. This is controversial! I admit that! But I stand by my stupid opinions on this blog, for some reason. I think One More Day when you examine it on its own, by which I mean you ignore the decade and a half worth of canon that came after it, as a Spider-Man story and as a PeterMJ-centric story holds up under scrutiny and that people who don't like it don't like complicated love stories and might actually throw their own mothers under buses. No offense to the OMD haters. Little bit of offense to the OMD haters. Brand New Day, which is the continuation of One More Day, on the other hand -- largely bad. Very largely bad.

But let's backtrack. One More Day is a four issue crossover storyline that takes place directly after Civil War, during which Iron Man and Captain America got divorced and divvied up the superhero community and Spider-Man made some startlingly bad decisions and made a fugitive out of himself and his family in a manner that got Aunt May shot, and Spider-Man: Back in Black (Amazing Spider-Man #539–543) which examines Peter's actions immediately after Aunt May is shot and ends with him humiliating the Kingpin in front of an entire prison. One More Day consists of Amazing Spider-Man #544 -> Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #24 -> Sensational Spider-Man v2 #41 -> Amazing Spider-Man #545. In One More Day, Aunt May is dying, all of Peter's efforts to save her have thus far failed, and, consumed by guilt, he is rapidly running out of time. Approached by Mephisto, a literal demon from hell, Peter is offered a deal: Aunt May will live -- and Peter's identity, which was previously revealed to the world at large during Civil War, will once again be hidden from the memories of all but a select few -- if Peter trades him his marriage to Mary Jane. Peter and Mary Jane struggle with this, but eventually both agree to the deal. The clock strikes twelve, the deal is done, and Peter and Mary Jane's marriage fades into history.

(ASM #545) A reasonably simple premise for a story that caused so many problems -- most, I would argue, not actually the original story's fault. So obviously, this was an unpopular move -- Peter and Mary Jane had for a long time been a fan favorite Marvel couple, and in a fictional universe where most relationships are doomed as soon as they begin, the enduring Spider-Marriage was sacred ground. And then, with a snap of its fingers, it was gone: Peter wakes up in Aunt May's house, no longer married, with Mary Jane out of the picture. (She would not return to the book on any sort of consistent basis for over 50 issues.) In the wake of One More Day began Brand New Day, which is basically what it sounds like: a promised "brand new day" of "exciting" Spider-Man content and a publishing schedule where Amazing Spider-Man came out three times a month. (Which sounds good on paper but I think in practice caused more problems than it created good storylines.) Peter, newly single again, had new love interests! And also Harry Osborn was alive again for some reason! I generally like Harry's post-BND stories so that part's fine with me.

But overall? Brand New Day is a mess. It knows it wants to tread new and exciting ground with Peter -- tell new stories! ensnare new readers! make them fork out for a book three times a month. -- but it doesn't know what those stories should be. Readers who were invested in Peter and Mary Jane's relationship -- a major facet of Spider-Man comics for decades at that point -- felt rightfully betrayed that the marriage could be so easily traded in and that Mary Jane herself, perhaps the second most important figure in Spider-Man comics after Peter, could be tossed aside. From a personal point of view, I think Brand New Day fails in large part because it abandons what has always made Spider-Man such a compelling series, and that's the mix of Peter's personal life with his vigilante life. BND sees Peter with new friends, new jobs, new love interests, etc -- it is very much a brand new day! But it isn't a better day compared to the stories that came before it. I do like some post-BND stories, especially American Son (ASM #595-599) and Grim Hunt (ASM #634-637), but compared to pre-BND where I think the majority of canon is good, it's a very lacking body of work that is hurt by the way it divorced itself from the PeterMJ marriage as Spider-Man's central relationship.

"But Traincat, I thought you said you liked One More Day?" Yeaaaaah. I do. This is why I keep saying I like One More Day on its own merits, and not on the merits of the stories it opened the doors for. I like a good romantic tragedy in fiction, and the way Peter and Mary Jane's final scene in One More Day plays out is beautiful. I like the idea of Peter caught in this impossible situation, being asked to choose between two women he loves more than his own life. A really common criticism I see leveled against One More Day is that Peter should have chosen his relationship with Mary Jane over May's life, which is -- okay, I think it's weird that people keep insisting on this, not in the least because by asking Peter to sacrifice his aunt's life they're essentially demanding he commit a callous, out of character act in order to further his own interests. It's also weird because the thing is, Peter already chose Mary Jane over May -- that's what gets them into this situation. It's literally in the scene where May is shot:

(ASM #538) When the gun goes off, Peter's spider-sense kicks in, and he covers Mary Jane, leaving May in the path of the bullet. He does choose Mary Jane over May, regardless of whether he realized what he was doing. And that's why he can't make that choice a second time. His actions in One More Day do make sense for him as a character, whether or not any individual reader likes them, and Mary Jane's actions make sense, too -- after all, she's the one who ultimately tells Mephisto that they agree to the deal when Peter can't bring himself to voice it.

A lot of people also like to nitpick One More Day by going, well, why could (x) or (y) with life saving powers save Aunt May which is like -- yeah, I guess, but if we're going to ask that about this specific comic book near death setup, you kind of have to do it with every single one, and I'm not going to stake every single moment of comic book drama on whether or not that gold kid from the X-Men was busy at the time. Comics are soap operas in flimsy paper form: serialized longform storytelling that relies heavily on melodrama. Sometimes you have to go with things. Sometimes you sell your marriage to the devil. Stuff happens. That in and of itself doesn't make One More Day a bad story -- and while some people blame the Spider-Marriage's dissolution entirely on One More Day, I think that's a little shortsighted when you look at the history of Spider-Man since the turn of the century. It's clear -- and Marvel themselves have been perhaps a little too open about this -- that Marvel in the past few decades has had trouble with the direction they want to take Spider-Man. They WANTED Spider-Man to appeal to a distinctly youthful audience that they didn't think they were actually reaching -- understandable, considering that Marvel nearly went bankrupt around 2000 and was saved by Ultimate Spider-Man, an out of main continuity series which retold Spider-Man from the beginning and focused heavily on Peter as a teen -- but the problem was Spider-Man in the main continuity was at that point in canon a happily married man who was pushing the dreaded 30 whether or not they wanted to admit that. This is also why Marvel has continually pivoted away from Spider-Man having kids, because they feared that making him a dad would age him too much and make him unrelatable to their coveted audience of Teens. (This is also why almost every new Spider-Man property, especially the live action movies, perpetually stick him back into high school, despite that occupying a very small slice of 616 canon.) So around the year 2000, they started trying things in relation to the Spider-Marriage, which was viewed as a major problem -- after all, what's more adult than being married and liking your wife. First, they had Mary Jane presumed dead. Then, they had Mary Jane and Peter separate. Then, when Mary Jane and Peter had only recently gotten back together, One More Day struck. If One More Day specifically hadn't gone the way it had, it's pretty clear that the Spider-Marriage was going to go one way or another -- it's a little bit of a shame it happened when it did, because OMD is the end of J Michael Straczynski's run, and JMS wrote a really beautiful Peter and MJ relationship. But Marvel as a company and especially editor in chief at the time Joe Quesada viewed Peter and Mary Jane's relationship as a major problem in how they wanted to portray Spider-Man and thought that striking the relationship from the books would allow them more freedom in their portrayal of him as younger and more relatable to their Desired Audience of people who I guess really wanted to see Peter sleep with characters who weren't Mary Jane.

(ASM #546. Younger! Fresher! Less attached! Kissing random women in the club!)

The problem with One More Day has always been in the follow through -- from the content of Brand New Day to the pacing of events to the fact that Marvel withheld key information for such a long time that it allowed misinformation to thrive. After all, what does it MEAN to trade Peter and Mary Jane's marriage to the devil? It altered the events of canon in Peter and the majority of other characters' memories so that the marriage didn't exist, but it left people wondering -- did the relationship as they remembered it existed? How much of Spider-Man canon was altered? And the answers didn't come for over 100 issues of Amazing Spider-Man. One Moment In Time or OMIT (Amazing Spider-Man #638-641), which revealed that while Peter and Mary Jane never got married in the altered canon they did continue their long committed relationship up until just after Civil War, was published in 2010, so essentially readers were hung out to dry without answers for three years. That's a long time to string people along, but not as long as it took Marvel to confirm that the popular fan theory that Mary Jane retained her memories of the original timeline as part of her own deal with Mephisto was also true, which happened this year. I would say, at least from my perspective, a lot of the frustration doesn't come from the individual One More Day storyline so much as how Marvel has continually dragged out the aftermath, using the promise of a Spider-Marriage return to keep fans on the hook. Which is why One More Day continually comes up in discussion of current Spider-Man, because Spencer's run has relied very heavily on imagery from that period with a serious question of whether or not there actually was going to be payoff, something which is still up in the air.

This has been Spider-Man History With Traincat, brought to you by anonymice like you.

[fullbushfemme]

Meeting the Mayans

word count: 1,804

summary: You thought you were prepared for anything. Growing up with four brothers, you had been bitten, beaten, thrown out of trees, concussed, stabbed, practically any violent act you could possibly think of, you had endured. For a kindergarten teacher, you were tough. You had the scars to prove it. That was, of course, until the day you met the Mayans.

unnamed mayan x fem!reader

warnings: brief mentions of blood, hostage situation, and a shooting.

author's note: I've had this idea in my head for ages now and I'm tempted to make it a series. The only issue is that I can't decide which Mayan I want to star (since they aren't named in this fic). I'm tempted to use this as a jumping off point for multiple fics, writing different stories from this initial incident involving different Mayans, but I'd love to hear any thoughts y'all might have :)

-I also haven't written anything outside of academic works in years so go easy on me <3

Santo Padre Septembers were always your favorite. It was sticky and hot, enough to make anyone want to jump into a pool fully clothed, but school was back in session, which meant you got to meet a new hoard of bright-eyed, eager five year olds. You had spent the last month preparing your classroom for their arrival. Nine am to one pm every day for four weeks was dedicated to decorating your classroom, making name cards, making sure every student had all the supplies they needed. Inside every desk you placed glue and markers and pencils and workbooks and scissors...everything a little kid would need to express themselves. And all of it out of your own pocket. You took it upon yourself to spoil these kids rotten.

Two weeks into class, you already knew everyone’s names, their favorite color, their pets, and whether or not they were allowed to watch TV after six o’clock. You knew who was friends with who, who couldn’t eat peanut butter, and who was most popular. This year’s class was going to be great, you just knew it.

It was a humid Friday afternoon. The room smelled like Elmer’s glue and pencil shavings, with stray scraps of construction paper strewn about the floor after the kids decided this week’s art project was going to be making dinosaurs out of construction paper and glitter. You were staying after class to clean up and vacuum, and to take the class rabbit home with you since no one had signed up to care for him this week, when you heard a knock at your door.

You looked over to the open door, squinting into the sun, trying to make out who it was. But no one was standing in the doorway. “Forget something?” you called out, thinking that a student must’ve left a lunch box or notebook and was feeling shy.

“Not exactly,” a deep voice responded, sending a twinge of fear through your body. You knew that voice. “I was hoping my baby sister could help me with something.”

A lump had formed in your throat that you tried to swallow, to no avail. “What are you doing here?” you choked out, standing from where you were picking up paper scraps.

“I need you to help me hide. Quickly.” Your older brother stepped into the classroom, gun in hand, pupils wider than you had ever seen them. He must’ve been high, you thought, panicked. What had he gotten into now? All four of your brothers were known to be trouble-makers to varying degrees. A few had been to prison for petty crimes, but the brother that stood before you had gotten wrapped up in drug trafficking years ago. He scared you the most. They had all promised your parents that they would keep their lives separate from yours, that they would never put you in harm's way. But it didn’t last. It felt like every other week you had a bruised or beaten brother on your doorstep, begging for help or a place to stay. And today, it was to ask you to hide them.

Your eyes flitted to the large windows overlooking the grassy courtyard where a few children sat waiting for their parents to pick them up. Hide. Hide from what? Who was coming after him? Would they hurt the kids?

“N-no,” you stammered, taking a step backwards. You couldn’t risk putting any kids still on campus in danger. “You can’t hide here. You have to go. You have to go right now.” You could feel a pit in your stomach begin to form as your brother took slow, long strides toward you.

“No?” he spat, completely dumbfounded by your refusal to help him. You had never turned him down before. He was family. You never said no to family.

You swallowed hard before repeating yourself. “No,” you responded, with more conviction this time, although you knew he could see right through you.

You took another step back, but ran up against your desk. Your phone was in the top drawer. Could you reach it fast enough? If you even could, who would you call? The police? That was a good way to get murdered and leave a teacher-shaped stain on the floor for the kids to come back to on Monday. Gripping the edge of the table so hard your knuckles turned white, your brother broke the ominous silence before you could.

“I’m not asking you again, hun,” he spat, now so close you could smell him.

“I can’t,” you whispered, your eyes welling up. “The kids…”

He furrowed his brow for a moment, shocked at the idea that you could actually turn your own flesh and blood away. You had always helped him, no matter how many times your parents told you not to, no matter how many times your life was put in danger. He couldn’t grasp the idea that you would put your foot down when it came to endangering other people, when it came to endangering your kids.

“They’ll kill you, you know,” he seethed, looking back over his shoulder towards the open door. There was a low rumbling growing louder and louder, but that wasn’t to whom he was referring. He was talking about your other brothers. “I told them I’d go to my baby sister, that she’d help me. She always helps me. Why would she flip on me now? Why wouldn’t she help family?” His grip tightened around his handgun as he leaned in to threaten you. “If anything happens to me, they’ll know to come to you first. They’ll know you couldn’t protect your own family.” His breath was hot against your neck. “Now,” he sighed, “Help me hide. And tell them you haven’t seen me in months.”

“I don’t think that’s such a good idea,” a man shouted from outside, causing your brother to grab hold of your arm. Those tears you had been holding back finally fell down your cheeks as your brother pulled you in front of him, placing you between the stranger and your brother. You could barely make out any details of the man from outside because of the blinding sun, but you could tell he had a gun. And that gun was much bigger than your brother’s. As the man moved into your classroom, at least five more men appeared and followed him in, all with guns pointed at your brother.

At this point, you were frozen. The lives your parents had so desperately tried to keep apart were crashing together, their worst nightmare coming true. The two of you were stuck, with only one way out. And he knew it. He gripped your arm tighter, making sure your body could be used as an effective human shield. The barrel of his gun was shoved into your ribcage, his face buried into the back of your hair.

“See what you’ve done?” he seethed. You looked at all of the men placed around the room. Leather-clad men on top of a backdrop of crudely painted rainbows and dogs. You hadn’t brought these men here. You didn’t anger a group of gun-toting men. And yet somehow, this was your fault.

“We’re only here for you, kid,” a low, rough voice called out, a different one than before.

But he wouldn’t let them take only him. He was bringing you down with him. He was willing to sacrifice his own family to keep from going down alone.

The seconds ticking by felt like hours. Your heart pounded against your ribcage, desperately trying to break free. But you could do nothing besides stand still. All you could do is hope and pray that these men that had followed your brother here had enough decency not to kill a kindergarten teacher caught in the crossfire. But your brother refused to give them that opportunity.

“If I go,” he yelled, raising his gun to your temple, “she goes too.”

These words would haunt your every thought for the rest of your life. But in that moment, all you could think about was the weapon pressed against your skin. Your brother wasn’t just willing to bring you down with him, he was willing to kill you himself. And the thought of it made you sick. It made you want to curl up into a ball and scream on the top of your lungs. You opened your mouth to cry out, but your brother hit you across the head with the butt of his gun before you could.

The men opposing your brother yelled, harsh words were exchanged, but all you could hear was a ringing in your ears. Tensions rose. Guns were raised. Blood dripped down your face and mixed with your tears. Your senses were betraying you, one by one, blending every sensation into one incomprehensible nightmare.

And then, a single gunshot rang out, making you acutely aware of the severity of the situation once more.

A scream escaped your chest as you fell to your knees, free from your brother’s death grip. You brought your hands up to your ears and squeezed your eyes shut, hoping it would all be over.

But it wasn’t over. It wouldn’t end. No matter how hard you prayed, you were still on the floor of your kindergarten classroom. Your brother was still prepared to kill you if he felt threatened. Someone was shot...someone was shot but you couldn’t bear to look. You wanted to look, you had to look, to see if it was your brother that was shot. But before you could muster the courage to open your eyes, two arms wrapped around you and pulled you into an embrace. It couldn’t have been your brother, it was much too gentle. But if it wasn’t him, then who?

It took a moment to open your eyes, but when you did, you looked up to see who was holding you. His face was kind, with dark brown eyes filled with worry as he looked down at you. He opened his mouth to say something to you, and he probably did, but you couldn’t hear him over the pounding in your head. He was a stranger to you, and yet he clung to you to keep you from seeing the mess behind you. Like he truly cared for your wellbeing. He pulled you in closer to him, placing his chin on top of your head the way your father did when you were young. It felt...safe. And all you wanted to do was collapse into him and allow yourself to feel safe. You let your head fall into his chest. You let your head fall into this stranger’s chest. And just as you did, two white patches on his left breast caught your eye. Two patches that read: Mayans, Santo Padre.

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

Hello! Sorry if my English is not as good 😅, but I really love your insightful thoughts about the characters and how you describe Comte 😍. If it's not an annoyance, I wanted to ask something about Charles (I know his route is not out yet and there is not much information about him). I've been seeing in some posts that Vlad did something to him in Dazai's route (i'm not sure what really happened) and i'm really curious about it, because even though it's known that Vlad uses his powers against his people, i can't really picture it due to the way Charles acts towards him with so much affection ?🤔 or admiration... (I guess it's because of his personality or trauma, behavior that it's different from Faust, who acts cautiously with Vlad) So it's something i'm truly curious about. Sorry for bothering you and Thank you!

Welcome welcome! Please don’t worry, I had no trouble at all understanding you, your English is great! ❤️❤️❤️ As for what I know about Charles, my information is limited due to the nature of his content so far--I haven’t seen a ton about him quite yet. But in Dazai’s route we get a glimpse into his situation due to his increased screentime there.  

I’m just going to put a spoilers warning here for Dazai’s JPN rt, since that’s where I’ve learned the most about Charles:

Charles is indeed a very affectionate and generally genki boy as far as interpretations go, but there are heavy implications that Vlad is manipulating him on a profound psychological level. I say this only because there is plenty of evidence that Charles’ behavior isn’t quite his own at points, and because Dazai himself proves it to be true.

One piece of information that is necessary before delving too deep is that Charles finds MC’s handkerchief at one point early on and develops a sudden curiosity/desire to see her. While a person could just assume he was curious, I don’t personally believe that curiosity went without surveillance or intervention--since Vlad was there the whole time.

My best guess is that Vlad wanted to find out more about MC and perhaps use her as bait to manipulate Dazai (or threaten Comte), but Dazai already offered him something interesting in wanting to warp the flow of time--so Charles’ relationship with her was only collateral in the end. While Charles did have some level of sincere feeling for MC, it’s later revealed that it was ostensibly an obsession and did not operate on a normal level of personable feeling.

The way Dazai further proves that Charles’ mind has been manipulated is that, when Dazai begins to suggest that Vlad is essentially a con-man that intends to use Charles for murder no matter the cost to his mental health, Charles reacts with unnatural distress. It’s not the kind of refusal a person would normally have at the suggestion of someone’s betrayal of their loyalty, where they reject it and are uneasy but otherwise aren’t physically controlled by the emotion. Charles seems unable to mentally handle the suggestion that Vlad’s intentions aren’t good at all--that he’s lying--to the point where Charles nearly collapses from the intensity of the dissonance between his own mind and the parts Vlad is forcing into obedience. 

There is also a scene following Charles’ intense mental distress where Vlad essentially interrogates Charles as to his loyalty, and gives the overtone that any kind of disobedience will be swiftly destroyed if he sees it. Faust tries to protect Charles as best he can, but his power is limited compared to Vlad’s.

Furthermore, Vlad is Charles’ sire (aka Charles’ creator as a vampire)--if he can command and manipulate Shakespeare as well as people extraneous to him so easily, I really doubt Charles would be beyond his control. The only reason Faust seems to have more agency and stability is that Faust is highly attached to his own internal emotional compass and what he believes in. (The keyword here is “seems”, if I’m honest I’m not 100% sure if Vlad isn’t still there in his mind, subtly manipulating him to the darker sides of his nature.) Charles, as much as I love him, seems even more susceptible to the emotional/motivational overtones of others around him. I mean Faust even uses a similar tactic to help Charles, in that he slowly walks him through to the solution, and Charles never once questions his judgement or thought process because it feels right to him. If you think about it Shakespeare is much the same way; he’s so obsessed with the creation of his plays and public reception to them that he is easily manipulated because he lacks personal grounding. Vincent, despite his gentle nature, is not half so susceptible to this manipulation because he is immovable at his core. There are moral lengths he will not go to no matter the intentionality, and his inspirations come from deep within. Even Dazai is too mentally strong to be controlled due to his immense love for other people. Vlad also cannot control him because he loves MC so deeply he would never betray that trust, the only single time he betrays it is when he seeks suicide (which is more about fighting his mental illness and self-harm than it is about hurting MC).

If I’m honest, I think Charles may want to believe in the best of Vlad. But I don’t think that necessarily means that Vlad is not manipulating him to his own ends, or that he isn’t causing Charles significant psychological distress/dissonance throughout the game. Charles seems like the type to want to believe in people even if he knows that belief might be misplaced. As for Vlad, I have little to no reason to believe he is not hurting Charles. He does not consider Charles his son in any capacity, and openly treats both Charles and Faust like tools to a greater end. With Vlad, only the results matter--the means are irrelevant.

[jimmygibbsjrrr]

I have a lot of thoughts about the Slaters

namely, I've been wonderin why the Fairfield Survivors got thrown off the boat in Death Toll

in this panel of The Sacrifice comic, Francis confirms the fates of three of the rescue vehicles:

Image ID:

A panel from The Sacrifice: Part 1. Francis is sat in the rescue vehicle from Blood Harvest, speaking to Louis. His dialogue is as follows:

"Louis, I hate to be the one to break this to ya, but we been heading to the safe zone four times now. Helicopter: crashed. Plane: crashed. Boat: kicked us out and left us to die."

/end ID

the chopper from No Mercy was confirmed crashed in Crash Course, and as for the plane from Dead Air, it was pretty easy to guess (and would have been confirmed in the cut campaign Dam It).

but the part about the boat? that's the Slaters' boat from Death Toll. this is the first time we learn this information.

so...why? what happened?

(more under the cut, ended up writing wayyyy more than I expected over these past few days and don't wanna clog people's dashes lol)

so. let's take a quick dive into the last chapter of Death Toll, to see what we can discern about the Slaters from their dialogue.

the rescue vehicle in Death Toll is a civilian boat, Saint Lidia II, owned by John and Amanda Slater, a married couple. Amanda is never heard in-game, but John's reactions to her can be heard over the radio.

the Slaters are explicitly looking for "anyone out there with firearms". John later adds that "once you get on this boat? Your job is keeping our asses alive". it appears that their motivation for saving the Survivors is selfish from the get-go.

this is undoubtedly true in Amanda's case, however, some of John's lines betray a more selfless attitude. he will berate Amanda for not "think[ing] about the little guy". he will ask, "So what, then? We leave 'em to die? I can't do that, Amanda." whilst Amanda is thinking purely of their own survival, John still feels compassionate towards his fellow survivors. despite this, he says that "I don't want our first act of kindness to be our last", acknowledging the conflict between his compassion and his self-preservation.

so. these are the Survivor's saviours in Death Toll. a conflicted married couple looking for bodyguards, offering to take the Survivors upriver to a military safe zone in exchange for protection.

as for why they get thrown off the boat...well, the easiest explanation would be Amanda.

but, stay with me here, because I think it's a little more complicated than that.

this boat? fulla tension. there's the obvious tension between the Slaters, who we've established seem to fight and disagree regularly. then there's the inevitable tension between them and the Survivors. I reckon Louis, with his generally positive and friendly attitude, wouldn't have much of a problem with them, might even attempt some friendly conversation or something. however, he's about the only one.

the comic fully establishes Bill as caring about nobody except the Fairfield Survivors - the most obvious evidence of this being the words he lives and dies by, "we look after our own". he isn't particularly interested in other people, unless they can help the group out. and he'd likely recognise the unstable and conditional nature of their rescue. while I'm sure he'd try and keep the peace, in any reasonable disagreement or fight Bill's likely to take his friends' side, and if anyone's getting thrown off the boat Bill is going with them. this goes for the whole group, to be honest; I don't think they'd want to split up at this point.

Francis hates boats, hates water, and can't swim, so (and I'm getting a little speculate-y here) would probably be in an even sourer mood than usual on the journey. being as abrasive as he is, plus this additional stress, it's fully possible he could piss off the Slaters enough to get himself (or all of them) thrown off the boat.

as for Zoey? well, I don't imagine a married couple who constantly argues is gonna sit well with her, considering her backstory. similarly to Francis, the situation they're in would make her far more stressed, making it more likely for her to lash out.

Amanda didn't want to save the Survivors in the first place, so while I think that John wouldn't throw them off the boat without reason, I reckon she could persuade him to throw them off if they 'caused trouble' - and they would get into an argument with her far easier than they would with John.

in short: yeah, I can see them getting thrown off the boat by the Slaters after some huge fight or disagreement. I think that's a reasonable interpretation of canon, and definitely an interesting concept.

...however, I do wonder if this tension would really be enough to destabilise their mutual need, after everything they went through to come together.

which is why I'm going to bring up The Last Stand!

I gotta quickly address something before this segment: yeah, I'm totally aware this campaign isn't canon. this evidence works with the fact that it exists in an 'alternate timeline'. also, I am missing a few citations for this section - if anyone can provide them I'd really appreciate it, but just a disclaimer that I currently can't prove some of the things the wiki claims members of the Last Stand Community Update Team have said. here and here are the wiki pages where I got this information. in short - the above explanation is simpler and more canon compliant, the conclusion I draw at the end of this post is backed by shakier evidence but I believe is more interesting, and you can make of all that what you will.

allegedly, members of the Last Stand Community Update Team confirmed a strongly-suspected fan theory about The Last Stand: that it branches off from Death Toll in some way, in a non-canon alternative timeline. as well as this, they allegedly confirmed that in this alternative timeline, the Survivors still end up in Newburg for Dead Air. even without the confirmation, this remains a solid fan theory, due to the constant references to Riverside and re-use of many of Death Toll's assets.

who rescues the Survivors in The Last Stand? John Slater. no Amanda - just John. despite her lack of voice actress, if she was still present John would give some indication of this at some point. it can be speculated that whatever happened to her contributed to the lack of rescue at the boathouse that forced the Survivors to take an alternative route. either way, he ends up at the lighthouse when the Survivors call for rescue, alone, and picks them up.

and then later...throws them off the boat. into Newburg.

what reason would John have to do that? without Amanda, surely he wouldn't have that push, as he wanted to rescue the Survivors for multiple reasons in the first place. without his constant arguments with Amanda, Zoey wouldn't be nearly as stressed. and between the three of them I'm sure the other Fairfield Survivors would stop Francis from pissing John off enough to get them thrown off the boat. in short, less Amanda = less tension, and no reason for the Survivors getting chucked off the boat.

...right?

I'd like to remind you that a symptom of the Infection is paranoia.

what if, in both The Last Stand and Death Toll, John and Amanda are infected by the Survivors on the way to the military safe zone? after all, the virus is confirmed to occasionally be airborne, and I doubt two civilians have completely effective, sustained protection against that. likely the only reason they hadn't already been Infected is because they got out on the water early on in the pandemic, and hadn't come into contact with anyone else since. it's unlikely that one of them is immune, and even more unlikely that they're both immune (especially considering those with XX chromosomes may be genetically less likely to be carriers). wouldn't Francis have mentioned it if their rescuers turned or were obviously Infected? yes, but it's possible that the airborne strain works slower as well, meaning that the Survivors are thrown off of the boat after the symptoms kick in but before the Slaters fully turn. even Church Guy had at least an hour from being Infected to turning, and he was bitten. Newburg isn't too far from where the Survivors are rescued in Death Toll anyway (the burning city in the background of the finale is Newburg), so the Survivors clearly didn't last long on the boat anyway. as a result, the Survivors wouldn't realise it was the Infection intensifying the Slaters' paranoia - they'd just think the Slaters were being dicks. Francis also explicitly mentions that they were "left to die", implying negativity or even hostility from the Slaters as the Survivors were being thrown off.

so yeah. that's why I think they got thrown off of the boat in Death Toll - a combination of the intense tension between the two parties, and the Slaters falling victim to Infection-induced paranoia. but an explanation minus the Infection is equally as plausible. it all depends on what you find most interesting, I suppose, and both feel like they fit pretty well into the world.

lord this is a long chunk o text. I know most fandoms prefer art and fanfic over this sorta thing, so please let me know in replies or something if you're interested in more stuff like this. also if any of this makes sense because I like to ramble.

oh and if you'd like to use any of my interpretations in fanworks like art or fic, I'd love to see it :)

[jumukus]

A3! Event: Trump the Phantom Thief Episode 8 Translation

Play time! A heads up on the characters' names:

Muku: King Yuki: Q Kazunari: Ace Juza: Jack Banri: Fox Sakyo: Club

Saionji: Muku-kun, how are you doing? Are you getting seasick?

Muku: I'm doing alright, thank you. Oh, and the room is so beautiful.

Saionji: I am glad it is to your liking. We purposely built the suite rooms in a place where you can't feel the ship's motion.

I am planning to take every possible measure for the theater venue as well, though do not hesitate to let me know if you are unsatisfied with anything.

Muku: I will. Thank you.

Kazunari: Dude, not only the suite rooms are superbs, but to think we also get a whole staff to ourselves…! We can even get the beverages here as many times we like!

Yuki: True. The service is just so good it surprised me.

Sakyo: Don't get too engrossed in these service or you'll be havin' a hard time once we return to Mankai Company.

Izumi: You have a point…

Banri: I don't wanna go back.

Juza: ...I'm thirsty.

Muku: Wanna get some beverages in our rooms?

Juza: No, it's fine. Our rooms are far from here.

Azami: There's a lot of vending machines there. I think they have your favorite strawberry milk.

Juza: I'll go get it.

Muku: …

Izumi: (Today is finally our opening show. I knew it. They all seem pretty nervous because we're going to perform in a different venue.)

Juza: …

Izumi: (Juza-kun looks stiff.)

Kazunari: OK, guys! We've gotta form a circle in times like this!

Banri: Be more specific. What d'you mean by "in times like this"?

Yuki: Bet you already thought of what kind of circle you wanna do.

Kazunari: Righty right! Since our play is about phantom thieves, we all should strike a phantom thief pose!

Sakyo: The heck is that?

Kazunari: No complaining! Just follow me!

Yuki: Fine. Fine.

Juza: ...Muku, do the chant.

Muku: First things first, I'm sorry for causing you guys troubles when I was at a loss of what to do.

I don't want to give up on all the things I want to do. I've decided to do everything I can in all of them.

I'll run through until the end. Follow me, guys!

Juza: Yeah!

Kazunari: Okie!

Banri: Yea.

Q: "It's as musty as always."

Ace: "Clean it up."

Q: "How about you do it?"

Ace: "No way. Geez. This place used to be clean, wonder what happened to it."

Q: "That's because we had a clean-freak before."

Ace: "Okay. Leader, you do the cleaning."

King: "I think it's pretty clean, though."

Q: "Seriously?"

Ace: "Should've known a messy room owner like Leader would say something like that."

Q: "Anyway. Since this is the first time we gathered here after a year, that means you've already set our next target, right? Let's cut to the chase already."

King: "Our next target will be "Mermaid's Tears", a 12-carat diamond."

"It's going to be sold during an auction held at the Royal Star cruise. It's one of the event's highlights and expected to sell for 6 billion."

Ace: "Woo-hoo."

Q: "Heh. Interesting."

King: "Royal Star is currently hiring staff. Q."

Q: "Got it. That means I have to sneak in as one of their staff members, right?"

King: "Ace, get close to the ship's captain and collect information."

Ace: "Roger."

Izumi: (I expect no less from Summer Troupe. They have great teamwork. I can totally feel it.)

(Not to mention Muku-kun's King is able to unite them as a leader.)

Q: "I'm in charge of the rooms in Block A… Laundry and… Ugh. What a hassle."

"This isn't my job in the first place, after all. If that person were here--."

Crew Member: "Are you new here? You seem lost."

Q: "Yes. I don't think I can get out of this place if I lose the map."

Crew Member: "You can ask anyone if there's anything you don't understand."

Q: "Thank you."

"?"

Crew Member: "What's wrong?"

Q: "I think I saw someone over there--."

Crew Member: "But there's only a garbage can over there. Is it a ghost or something?"

Q: "Hey. Stop. I don't like it."

"Hm? A letter?"

"Could this be--I have to report to King."

King: "I'll take the Mermaid's Tears--Jack."

Ace: "Can't believe he's aiming for the same thing."

Q: "Him and King sure are compatible in a strange way."

Ace: "Even though their personalities are the exact opposite of each other."

Q: "What are we going to do now?"

Ace: "Guess we're gonna have a change of pla--."

King: "We'll continue the operation."

Q: "Come again!?"

Ace: "So you mean we're gonna compete with Jack?"

King: "I will not send out this notice. Let's call it a direct confrontation between Trump and Jack."

Q: "Whaaaat!?"

Jack: "Weird. The cops aren't on the move."

"Hm? Where's my noti--."

"It's been a while. How about a reunion? At The Mermaid's Tears' chamber. Trump."

"King, huh… It's just so like him to do something like this. Fine. Let's have a showdown."

Fox: "Here. I got what you wanted, the Royal Star's blueprint."

King: "It is indeed the blueprint."

Fox: "I got you some addition as well. This one is a lil bit pricey."

King: "Figured as much."

Fox: "What are you going to do with this information, though?"

King: "It's prohibited to poke your nose into your client's private life."

Fox: "Oops. My bad. I was curious since you rarely asked for something like this. Oh, yeah. Your master said he wanted to see you."

King: "Club? I wonder why. I'll try contacting him."

Club: "I'm comin' in."

Fox: "Speak of the devil."

King: "Long time no see."

Club: "Perfect timing. Are you free now?"

***

Club: "I'm goin' to retire soon. Take whatever you need."

King: "Retire? Are you serious?"

Club: "My body is startin' to fall apart. It's an age thing. Tell this to Ja--Oh, right. I heard you two broke up."

King: "You made it sound like we're dating. Please don't do that. He just decided to quit my group on his own."

Club: "Y'all never change. Here I thought you'd keep workin' together. That's what you call youth, I guess."

King: "To be honest with you, I'd also never thought he would betray me."

Club: "Looking at that guy, I think he's in his rebellious phase rather than betrayal."

King: "Rebellious phase?"

Club: "He's got some strong sense of rivalry, y'know? Add that with the fact that he's never won against you."

"He must be jealous of you. You're a genius, while he can only do things in a crude way."

King: "Really? I like his way of doing things, though."

Club: "That's exactly why you're hated. Oh, well. You better make up before I die."

King: "Please tell that to him too. You're going to meet him after this anyway, right?"

Club: "You're right. Guess I'm also gonna tell him directly. Both of you are my most excellent apprentices, after all."

King: "Please take this as my present for your retirement. This one is 40 years old."

Club: "You sure are well prepared."

King: "I was actually planning to use it for the celebration party, though."

"--Oh, right. If you're going to retire, please give me that. You know, the 'Venus Ring'."

Club: "I refuse."

***

Fox: "Welcome. Man, I guess we've got a lot of 'speak of the devil' moment today."

Jack: "What are you saying?"

Fox: "Nope. Forget it. Anyway, this is your requested uniform and safe."

Jack: "Thanks."

Fox: "Oh, yea. Your master said he wanted to see you. Why don't you give him a call?"

***

Jack: "Long time no see."

Club: "Hey. Is it just me or did you lose some weight?"

Jack: "What do you want to talk about?"

Club: "I'm gonna retire soon. Take whatever you need."

Jack: "Whatever you need, huh. By the way, the 'Venus Ring'..."

Club: "Y'all really have the same taste. I ain't gonna give it out. I sent it to the right place."

Jack: "By y'all… Do you mean King?"

Club: "You should just go back and regroup with him."

Jack: "I'll never go back until I win against him."

Club: "What a pig-headed kid. So? You see any chance to accomplish that?"

Jack: "I have a feeling we're finally going to settle this soon."

Club: "Heh. You seem confident."

Jack: "Because I've made arrangements ahead of time."

Club: "That's so you. You still look as gloomy as ever, though. Why don't you go soaking up the sun in some warm places in the south once in a while?"

Jack: "No--But you have a point. Maybe I'll do that once this is over."

Club: "Do that. And make up with King."

Jack: "...It depends on him."

Guard A: "Wait there."

Guard B: "This place is restricted to authorized personnel."

***

Q: "'Mermaid's Tears' has been carried away."

King: "Got it. Looks like they put it at the expected place."

Q: "How about the security? Can you unlock it?"

King: "I've already made preparation for that. We just need to see how things will turn out."

Ace: "Hey, wait a sec. Please, King."

King: "Find out the schedule for the guards' lookout."

Q: "Ugh. What a pain. Why do I have to do this…"

***

Q: "The guard will change at 1 P.M. The key will only be handed over when a substitute comes."

King: "So we need that key and the password that the captain has to unlock the door."

Q: "Ace, gain some time for us."

Ace: "Roger. Leave it to me."

Q: "Don't screw up."

***

Ace: "Hey, good work."

Guard A: "You're here sooner than I thought."

Ace: "Boss said my shift would start 30 minutes earlier since I'm always late, you see. Today I got here on time, though."

"Oh. Don't tell me you're gonna get scolded if you end your shift early? Wanna have some chat for thirty minutes then? Man, being a guard sure is easy."

"I actually want to increase my shift more, you know. But I don't reall--."

Guard A: "No, it's fine. I'll end my shift now. Bye."

Ace: "Oh. Okay, then. Bye."

***

Ace: "Mission complete. It's your turn now, King."

King: "Let's see, now. This is unexpectedy such a hassle~."

Ace: "I'm glad you seem to be having fun but please hurry up."

***

Q: "It's almost been thirty minutes."

King: "Just a little bit more…"

Q: "The guard is coming."

King: "I'm counting on you, Ace."

***

Ace: "Hey.."

Guard B: "Hm?"

Ace: "Ouch ouch ouch…"

Guard B: "What's wrong?"

Ace: "Oh, are you the substitute? Thank God. I'm starting to panic since my stomach is killing me. Good bye!"

Guard B: "Hey, wait, the key--."

Ace: "Key? Oh, right. I've gotta hand it ove--ouch ouch ouch."

Guard B: "Hey, you okay?"

Ace: "Wait a minute. Just until I calm down. Ouch ouch ouch…"

Guard B: "F-For now, just go to the toilet first."

Ace: "Don't think that's possible. I feel like it's gonna come out once I move."

Guard B: "Whaaat!?"

Ace: "Do you have some medicine or anything?"

Guard B: "No, sorry…"

Ace: "Can you bring me one from the infirmary? I'm on the edge here."

Guard B: "O-Okay! Wait a little bit!"

Ace: "King, you better open it now."

***

King: "...Weird. We may not make it."

Ace: "Come again!?"

King: "Oh, I got it. This one."

"...Nice. It opens!"

"Q, carry it out. Let's retreat."

Q: "Got it."

***

Guard B: "Hey, I have the medicine!"

Ace: "Very thanks, man. Here, your key! I'll leave the rest to you."

Guard B: "Yeah. Hope you recover soon."

King: "...This is weird. Jack didn't come in the end."

Q: "Maybe he realized it's impossible to go against phantom thieves."

King: "No. That guy…"

Police: "Freeze! We're police!"

King: "--."

Q: "!?"

Ace: "Since when!?"

King: "We're being set up. Q, throw the 'Mermaid's Tears' to the sea."

Q: "Huh!? Do you hear yourself now!?"

King: "Do it now. We'll escape the moment the police look away."

Ace: "You're lying, right!?"

King: "Quick."

Q: "You're the one who told me to do it, alright!"

Police: "H-Hey! The jewel! Pick it up, quick!"

King: "Let's go!"

Police: "Wait!"

Q: "What do we do now!? All of our hardship went to waste!"

Ace: "Our 6 billion…"

King: "That was a fake jewel Jack had prepared."

Q: "What?"

King: "Jack had stolen 'Mermaid's Tears' in advance and replaced it with a fake one."

"He was the one who snitched on us."

***

Narration: "The day before…"

Guard A: "Hey, what's wrong?"

Jack: "No, it's just… the engine…"

Guard A: "Hold on, hold on. If there's any trouble, you better do something about it or else it'll get worse later on. If we're liable for the damages…"

Jack: "There's smoke coming out!"

Guard A: "Say what!?"

Jack: "Stay away from the car!"

Guard B: "Whoa!"

Guard A: "C-Call the fire station! Wait, we gotta get the safe first!"

Guard B: "Hey, is it okay?"

Jack: "Yeah. The smoke disappeared. I found no issues with the machine too."

Guard A: "That means the safe is alright, yeah? God. Give me a break. We almost carry it away ahead of time."

***

Q: "So that's why Jack didn't show up…"

Ace: "He really got us! I already thought it was weird for the police to appear at times like that!"

Q: "Ugh. Even if the police didn't appear, Jack still won since he already got the 'Mermaid's Tears' before us."

King: "I wonder about that."

***

King: "He hasn't made any changes in his base. Well, isn't he a little careless…"

"Even his security system is so weak."

"Hm? A card?"

"'Out of respect of Master's retirement, I will hand over the victory.'"

"Don't be satisfied with second place. You could have taken measures if you know there's a chance it'll get stolen. Oh, well. I'll accept your kind offer…"

***

Jack: "..."

"He really came…"

King: "Hey."

Jack: "--ugh. Why are you still here, King?"

King: "It's been a long time, I want to renew our friendship. I even brought alcohol with me."

Jack: "This is why you're hated."

King: "But you don't hate me, do you?"

Jack: "How did you find out?"

King: "I got some information about you from Fox. It helped me understand your strategy to some extent."

Jack: "In that case, why did you fall into the trap?"

King: "Because, otherwise, you won't move forward as planned. I'll be troubled if you're on your guard."

"I could narrow down your base thanks to the location device I planned on the alcohol I gave to Club. The rest is my intuition."

Jack: "I can never bring myself to like you in the end."

King: "Now, now. Let's have a toast for the 'Mermaid's Tears'. Q and Ace are waiting."

Izumi: (This is the only scene where Jack and King talk face to face. Even so, you can tell how close they are just by watching this scene alone.)

(Maybe because they are cousins, they can create a unique relationship between rivals who understand each other the most.)

***

Muku: Thank you so much!

Juza: Thank you.

Sakyo: Thank you.

Yuki: Thank you.

Kazunari: Thankies thankies~!

Banri: Thank you.

***

Sakyo: The audience's reaction on our first show is great.

Juza: King was so cool.

Muku: Jack was even cooler! The fact that he's active behind the scenes is just so Juchan!

Juza: I can also feel the gap between King, a sharp person with a gentle look, and you, Muku.

Muku: I-Is that so? Ehehe. But your Jack…

Azami: They're going to be like that forever at this rate.

Yuki: When are you going to stop?

Banri: But well, it was good overall. Right?

Kazunari: Totally! Their chemistry was just perfect on the stage, even the audience was pleased!

Izumi: Let's keep this energy until the closing show!

Muku: Yes!

< Episode 7 | Masterlist | Episode 9 >

[casmybelovedass]

The Destiel Folder: Season 7

[Season 4; Season 5; Season 6]

This season is mostly Dean being a depressed bi who can't cope with his crush's death.

This is, in my opinion, the season where Dean actually starts realizing he might for real think of Cas as something more.

Episode 1:

Cas is basically gone, both Bobby and Sam (almost) are ready to compel to whatever he says, but Dean still tries to get him to come back. "You can turn this around. Please!" (3:13) Denial

Dean has no idea how to deal with God!Castiel, but desperate to find him, and getting emotional "I don't even know what book to hit for this." "Then figure it out!" (5:47) Anger

As we have said many times already, angels don't have a sex, Castiel is not a man, and as he states, he is "utterly indifferent to sexual orientation" (8:03), and so is Chuck, God himself, who has admitted having had both girlfriends and boyfriends.

Dean turns off the news the moment he hears a woman describe Cas as "young and sexy", while doing that jaw clentch thing of his (10:14) ... huh... [and this doesn't really matter, but after this we immediately see Dean in a purple flannel. PURPLE! Go Bi!Dean]

"He's not a guy, he's a God [...] Cas is never coming back. He's lied to us, he's used us, he's cracked your gourd like it was nothing. No more talk. We've spent enough on him." (11:09) Dean trying to jump to the 5th stage of grief. Yeah, no baby that's not how it works

Dean tries so hard to convince himself that Cas's gone so he can kill him, but can't really. "Just kill him now!" and struggles hard to hold Castiel's glare. And as soon as Death offers a second option to killing him, Dean takes it. Bargening

"Dean, look, I know you think Cas is gone." "That's because he is." (31:22) Again with trying to jump to acceptance. Not doing great, Dean. In fact, "Yeah, you know how I'm gonna deal? I'm gonna stuff my pie hole, I'm gonna drink, and I'm gonna watch some asian cartoon porn. And act like the world's about to explode, because it is." (32:17) There it is. Depression.

[Remember this: Dean has no shame in watching porn in front of his brother. Wait a few seasons and see]

Just moments earlier, Dean was all "That's not Cas, Cas is dead" and shit, and now he goes "What? You need something else?" worried-husband-mode the moment Cas asks for help (34:50). Also#MARRIED (35:16)

Bobby: "Where's Sam? It's go time." Dean: *looks back at Cas worried* (37:12)

MUST HELP HUSBAND (38:06) look at Dean's eyes!!! They're like 'It's okay, it's okay. You've got this.' "I'm sorry, Dean." Cas chose these words to be his last, thinking he was going to die. LOOK AT DEAN (38:21) ICWAW this would MEAN SOMETHING ELSE

"CAS! [...] Is he breathing? ... Maybe angels don't need to breathe." says the one who was going around saying Cas was gone for good. "He's gone, Dean." "... damn it... *tears up* Cas, you child... Why didn't you listen to me." #MARRIED (39:15) Then he goes "CAS?!" as soon as he starts breathing again. ICWAW, we would SCREAM "LOVE" in this scene

"Imma find some way to redeem myself to you *looks at Dean straight in the eyes*" "*looks at Cas up and down*... Alright, well, one thing at the time, come on. Let's get you out of here." "I mean it, Dean." *eye love-making* "... Okay." (40:30) ICWAW, oooohhh, the meanings this scene would have...

Dean's face when the Leviathans tell him Cas is dead. Again. (41:18)

Episode 2:

Dean looking at the Leviathans occupying Cas' body. The HATE (1:44)

"... okay... so he's gone. *shakes while tearing up* [...] Dumb son of a bitch..." (5:14) Here we go again... I'm fine, shut up

Dean picks up, washes, folds and keeps Cas' coat (5:23) SWEET

"You just lost one of the best friends you've ever had." this hurts me. "... I'm fine, really." (12:11)

"You asked me how I was doing? Well, not good." (38:54)

Episode 5:

Dean progressively drinks more as his nightmares get worse and he misses Cas more and more. 3 times we see him drink, only in the first 12 minutes.

Sam can tell Dean feels like shit, and bet one of those reasons is Cas "Like it or not, the stuff you don't talk about, it doesn't just go away. It builds up." (39:33) Yeah, and not only problems or grief... even love

Episode 7:

Not a destiel moment, but Dean totally got hit on by the waiter. LOL (7:30)

And again. What is it with men in this town and Dean. "We're looking for a necklace." "Romantic. *looks at Dean*" (12:17). Is it an energy reading thing or something? Can they feel the bi energy?

"The Campbell brothers. [...] They weren't actually brothers. That was a cover for their, uhm... alternative life style." (22:40) Huh... I guess calling your lover "brother" runs in the family

"Ever since Cas... I'm having a hard time trusting anybody." (40:44) ouch

Episode 9:

Dean is drunk/high on Leviathan juice, and the first thing he thinks and blabbers about, is Cas (19:48) "I don't even care anymore." Oooohh ICWAW... the possibilities for this scene

Episode 12:

Dean totally checked out that man in uniform. FIGHT ME (16:27)

Episode 13:

"You're head's not in it, man. When Cas died, you were wobbly, but now-" "Now what!!" (39:35) as soon as Sam mentions Cas' death, Dean gets snappy

Episode 17:

Dean keeps getting snappy whenever Sam mentions Cas

"OH my God the love of my life is alive!" (13:02-13:06)

Dean's face when Daphne touches Cas (13:25), and when he calls her his wife (13:41)

AND HIS FUCKING FACE TRYING NOT TO TEAR UP BECAUSE CAS DOESN'T REMEMBER ANYTHING ABOUT HIM (14:16)

You mean to tell me that ICWAW this wouldn't be seen as a mini desperation moment from a man seeing his lover in this situation? Yeah, I don't think so

"What if you were some sort of... I don't know, bad guy." "I... I don't feel like a bad person." Dean's face is like "Damn right you aren't" (16:50)

"He betrayed you, this dude. He was your friend?" Dean looking at him... can't even answer the question (19:59)

Dean says Cas' betrayal is something he cant get over like everything else. And that he doesn't know why. "It doesn't matter why." "Of course it matters!" (20:25)

Dean gets visibly uneasy about Meg being so close to Cas (25:34) jealous boyfriend is jealous

Dean doesn't want Cas to remember, afraid he'll leave again (32:18)

"I've known you for years!" (32:34) poor baby. Also "You're an angel." "Uhm, I'm sorry? Is that a flirtation?" DEAN'S FACE (32:42)

Dean doesn't want Cas to be hurt by his own memories and past actions (33:00)

"You used to fight together. Bestest friends, actually." Yeah, look at that reaction. Let's see how he reacts to being called his boyfriend later on (33:09)

#MARRIED!!! I'll just leave this. No comment (33:41)

As Cas regains his memories, only 2 of the ones we see are not of Dean. And the only one we hear is the "I'm sorry, Dean." . That is what matters to Cas (and this looks like a slash video. Kudos to the editors) "I remember you... I remember everything." Yeah, no-homo save (34:35)

Not even an hour earlier, Dean was ranting about Cas betraying him, how he couldn't forget and forgive him, and now he is saying Cas did "the best you could at the time", but Cas actually feels guilt and doesn't want Dean to defend him, but Dean does anyway (36:53)

"We didn't part as friends, Dean." "*looks at Cas up and down*... So what?" "I deserved to die." the look on Dean's face (37:18)

Dean gives Cas his trench coat back. The trench coat he kept, folded and all the the truck, for weeks. And that's not even Baby. So he moved the coat, to always have it with him (37:26). I'm not crying, shut up

Also, here, have a deleted scene that breaks my heart

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Episode 20:

Let us all appreciate that one time Dean helped a lesbian flirt with a dude (24:27-25:03)

Episode 21:

Dean is devastated about Cas' mental state, that he did that to himself to save Sam. Look at his eyes in this scene (16:08). Also, Dean still resents Cas for the whole 'New God' crap, but it feels like the real reason is the fact that he left (19:18)

"Cas! Don't make me pull this car over!" "Are you angry? Why are you angry? *puppy eyes*" "... No I-I'm..." #MARRIED (27:28)

Cas says he won't fight anymore, but as soon as Dean's in trouble, he FLIPS

"The angels... they don't care... I think maybe they don't have the equipment to care." (31:49) Touchy much, Dean?, are you trying to convince yourself about that? It feels like he's making excuses to not let himself feel anything for Cas. "It seems like when they try, it just... breaks them apart." ... OK, fuck everything, ICWAW this would totally be seen as romantic angsty reference to Cas

Cas is so lost in his guilt for what he has caused. He looks like a baby, and it gets worse when it comes to Dean

"Why should we give you anything? After everything you have taken from us? The very touch of you curropts. When Castiel first laid a hand on you in Hell, he was lost!" (36:50) okay damn, ICWAW all of this would seem as if they were talking about a love relationship between the two and you can't tell me otherwise

'HURT HUSBAND-MUST PROTECT MODE' (37:17)

"The bone of a righteous mortal and the blood of a fallen angel" ... shut up, I'm dying over these clues (39:11)

"What are you gonna do, Cas?" Dean's eyes are begging him to stay. ICWAW, we would point that out without a shadow of a doubt (39:40)

Episode 23:

"Dude... on my car. He showed up naked... covered in bees!" ... come on, ICWAW this would be a HUGE deal (5:10)

"Go ask him. He was your boyfriend first." (8:51) LISTEN HERE. I study psychology, and one of the first things they teach you is that jokes are based on the truth. HOW MANY OF THESE JOKES WERE MADE?! HUH??!! (plus all the "Dick" jokes Sam made) Also Dean's reaction with the jaw clentch... just saying

Cas keeps stating he doesn't want to fight, but again, Dean's in trouble? FIGHT MODE

"*soft shoulder touch, puppy eyes, serves Dean a sandwich*" ... SOFT #MARRIED COUPLE (18:27)

"You got anything to say on the topic of dicks?" you'd like that, wouldn't you, Dean? (26:42)

Cas is afraid he will do something to cause Dean more trouble. Let's remember he chose what he believed were his last words to be "I'm sorry, Dean.", but as we know, Dean deals with feelings by showing anger... Cas gets upset and copes by playing twister... pathetic. "I can't help. [...] I destroyed everything and I will destroy everything again!" for a moment, Cas is lucid, and expresses his fear, but as soon as Dean gets angry with him, Cas gows back to hide in his world of crazy (26:47)

"I'm not good luck, Dean." "... You know what? [...] I'd rather have you. Cursed or not." Look at Cas' soft little smile as it grows. ICWAW, this would be read as another confession (32:38)

"I'll go with you." SOFT

SEE??! The MOMENT Dick threatens Dean, Cas goes full Angel of the Lord on his ass. MUST PROTECT HUSBAND (36:52) and the utter shock on Dean's face is priceless

And here comes PurGAYtory

[Season 8>>]

[shi-daisy]

Snowed In

Well this it folks, my last Ulquihime Week entry for this year. As always it's been a joy to participate and see everything that all of the other users have created, and that those who host the event take such care to plan our ship week. I had a blast and I'm looking forward to doing this again next year. Till then however, let's all keep on making content for our otp!

Ok so onto the story, today's theme is Winter/Warmth and I really didn't know what to do, until I remembered I have a whole AU I could use and stuck with that. For those who haven't read my entries from previous years the Reunion AU basically had Ulquiorra and Orihime meet again after a few years, Orihime ran off from her wedding with Ichigo and Ulquiorra is now human(along with the other Arrancar). At this point in the time the two have been dating for a month. Hope you like!

@ulquihimeweek

Ulquihime Week- Day 6: Winter/Warmth

Snowed In

"For the last time Tia, I'll ask her but that dosen't mean she'll say yes." Ulquiorra repeated over the phone for what felt like the hundredth time that day.

His friends had all told him to invite Orihime over for Christmas dinner, and while he wasn't too keen on the holiday he knew his woman was. This would be the first time he would be asking her to spend an event with him and his 'family' and while he might deny it, Ulquiorra was nervous.

"Schiffer, of course she'll say yes. That girl is quite taken with you."

"I'd like to think so, but still, don't be disappointed if she declines."

"Yes, yes, I am ready to accept a negative answer. Still, I wanted some civilized company this year."

He could tell she directed her angry tone at Nnoitra. From over the phone Ulquiorra could hear them bickering.

"If ya don't want me to eat the cookies. Don't leave em on the table!"

"Those were freshly baked! How are you not burned?!"

"Cuz I still have Arrancar-like skin."

"Fool! Your hands are red! I have to go Ulquiorra. Our gigantic toddler has injured himself again."

"No surprise there. I shall see you later."

He arrived at the cafe soon after his call ended, yet he knew things weren't right. Orihime usually waited for him outside, but despite the closed sign in the door, she was nowhere to be seen. Ulquiorra rushed into the cafe, immediately upon entering he heard a loud noise.

"I know language was never your best subject but I think the sign on the door was pretty easy to read Kurosaki!"

"Inoue, just let me explain everything."

"I told you to fuck off!" Orihime angrily took off her arpon and walked away. Ulquiorra headed towards her. The second she saw him, her anger subsided.

He dared to look at Kurosaki. The redhead was no longer the headstrong teen he had met six years ago. His hair was shorter, and while he's grown taller, Ulquiorra thought he looked less intimidating.

"How- How are you here? You died."

"I got better." Ulquiorra answered sarcastically. "Now, I believe you heard the woman. She's not interested in speaking to you."

Ichigo didn't seem keen on backing down, his surprised stare turned into a glare. "You don't get to decide for her anymore, Ulquiorra."

"Oh just shut up already, Ichigo! I don't owe you shit! Tatsuki picked up my stuff a while ago, I've kept away from you and your kin, and paid back what I owed to you father. Aside from those unresolved matters we have nothing else to talk about!"

"I think leaving one's own wedding and then vanishing for two months is something to talk about! You never gave me an explanation for that."

He'd never seen Orihime so enraged, her pale face turned red and she was clenching her fist so hard her arms shook. "You want an explanation?! Fine! I left because just as I was going to get Kenpachi-san to walk me to the altar, I found you and Kuchiki-San! Then you kissed her! When we were young I thought you were in love with her, but since you proposed to me and made me feel as if I was the one you wanted, my worries faded. Imagine how I felt at that moment! I gave up NASA for you, scholarships, internships, my own damn college ambitions all went down the drain! All because I wanted to be with you, and look where the fuck that got me!

So there's your bloody explanation! Now scram!"

There was a small moment of silence before Kurosaki left. The second he was out the door, Ulquiorra hugged Orihime close. "Let it out."

Orihime didn't want to cry over it anymore, but her body betrayed her. She shook as she cried, her sobs echoed in the small cafe and the only solace she could find was the warmth Ulquiorra's hug provided.

As he held onto her, Ulquiorra checked an alert on his phone. There was a snow storm coming to Naruki.

"Woman, it's likely we won't be able to reach your apartment in time. Would you like to accompany me home?"

Orihime stopped crying after hearing that. "Yes. I'd love to go with you."

"Good, I've sent a message to Szayel, he should be coming to pick us up before the storm gets worse."

"Okay."

Orihime stared at Ulquiorra's face for a moment. When she first saw him again after all these years he looked just as he did the day he turned to ash under her touch. Now, he seemed so different. His hair was longer and styled, he often wore leather and dark make up, and even facial jewelery. She also noticed he began doing those things when the two began dating. Maybe it was an effort to become more human like for her.

"Ulqui, are you sure it's okay for me to come home with you? I don't want to bother the others."

"It's no bother, they were all hoping to see you again." Ulquiorra cleared his throat, as he often did when he was nervous. "Actually they were insistent that I brought you home for Christmas celebrations next week."

She blushed. "Really? I'd love to go! Spending Christmas alone is not much fun. I would be happy to spend it with your family."

He sighed in relief. "I'm glad."

"You sound nervous, did you think I'd decline?"

"Well, yes. But that's not why I was nerveous. It's just the others can be quite a handful. I don't want them to overwhelm you."

"I'll be fine, I love hyper groups of people. Besides you and I can have some alone time later."

"That I won't mind."

Szayel arrived at the cafe slightly later than expected. The sky was already darkening, and the road was icy. He drove slowly but made sure to calculate the time properly.

"Inoue-san, I hope you don't mind, Halibel has prepared a room for you, along with clothes. It's likely the snowstorm will keep you from going home tonight, perhaps even longer."

"That's fine. Thanks for telling me Szayel. I'll be sure to not cause any trouble."

"Oh sweetie it's no trouble at all, we are all looking forward to having you around. Ulquiorra has told us so much about you!"

Ulquiorra, Who had been dozing off in the front seat, was now wide awake and glaring at Szayel.

Orihime laughed at the scene before her. "Does he? What has he told you?"

"That he enjoys speaking to you, and that you have a lovely aura, and that you look very pretty in a sundress."

By now Ulquiorra was a blushing mess, he hid his face under the hoodie of his coat, but Orihime has already seen it. She smiled and blew a kiss in his direction. "Well I think he looks good in black clothes."

Ulquiorra caught the hint. Black was what he always wore, meaning Orihime always found him to be cute. He smiled, this time without covering his blush.

***

Her arrival had been met with hugs, greetings, an enthusiastic snuggle from the family's pet.

"Kukkapuro's no stranger to cuddling new people. He won't leave you alone for the rest of the night." Stark drowsily told her as he tried to get Kukkapuro to move. The hollow puppy ignored him.

"That's okay, Stark-san. I don't mind."

The sleepy man nodded and went back to his favorite spot, on the lap of his boyfriend. Szayel rolled his eyes and let him sleep.

She smiled at the scene, it reminded her of the times she'd act overly affectionate and Ulquiorra would be either unimpressed or dead quiet. Strangely enough she didn't mind.

"Orihime! Can you come to the kitchen? I need your help!"

She followed Halibel's voice to the kitchen. The older women had baked a new batch of cookies and wanted her opinion.

"You're the star baker after all." She told her.

The woman's tone was so sweet Orihime couldn't bear to tell her she hadn't finished culinary school.

She took a bite, savoring the sweet yet salty ginger cookie. "These are great! You're an incredible baker, Halibel-san."

"Thank you, it means a lot coming from a professional. There is something I'd like your help with."

"Anything."

***

"Are you going to chose a movie already?!"

Ulquiorra glared at Nnoitra, who had probably been banned from the kitchen.

"I am not choosing anything until the girls come back with the food. Have some patience Jiruga!"

"I am plenty patient!"

"I agree with Ulquiorra, you have a short fuse. Now be quiet." Szayel snapped.

"Tch. If I'd know you were going to be so moody I would've spent the week with Tesla and Cyan."

"Tesla might've been your fracción but I think even he knows you shouldn't be around a newborn." Stark mumbled in his drowsy state.

Ulquiorra chuckled, as he remembered the little bundle Cyan had given birth to a week ago. He didn't consider himself the baby type but that had been disproven the moment he was allowed to carry the tiny child.

"Maybe you and Inoue will produce a cute baby one day."

Ulquiorra almost fell off the sofa. "Nnoitra if you don't shut up I will disembowel you!"

Szayel shushed them both and pointed down to a sleeping Stark, but by then it was too late. The pair began bickering and Kukkapuro howled along.

***

"See? It's always like this. Can't get some quiet until bedtime."

"Don't worry. This'll warm them up!"

The girls walked out of the kitchen with cookies and hot chocolate. "Settle down! We're here with the treats! Ulquiorra you can pick a movie if you'd like."

He nodded and began browsing. Orihime gave everyone a cup of chocolate and cookies. Once her boyfriend had picked a movie, she sat down with him and their treats.

It didn't take long for the others to fall asleep. According to Ulquiorra this was a common occurrence. 'They'll be asleep before the second act ends.'

The couple was snuggling together covered by a thick blanket, they had finished their sweets and once the movie ended they would be going to bed.

"Hey Ulqui."

"Yes, love?"

"Thanks for tonight. I don't know how badly things would've gotten if I hadn't come with you."

Seeing Ichigo had soured her day greatly, and walking home alone in the freezing cold to cry herself to sleep would've been twice as hellish. Thankfully her boyfriend was there to dry her tears and make her smile again.

"You're welcome woman. I shall always be here for you, so whenever you feel like the world is falling apart remember to lean on me. It is now my eternal duty to keep you smiling."

She giggled and nuzzled close to him. "Thanks Ulqui. You're really sweet." The beating of his heart was lulling her to sleep, but Orihime resisted, she wanted to see the end of the movie. "I have to repay you one day for all the kindness you've given me. Feels like I'm only taking."

"No, you're mistaken. It is I who's repaying a debt to you. Back when I was a hollow you brought joy into my life again, and since then I've thought that one lifetime won't be enough to repay you."

"Then you better be with me in every other lifetime."

He wouldn't refuse such a request. Ulquiorra looked down at Orihime, their gazes met and he knew this was the perfect moment to do as he had planned for so long. He leaned down to press his lips against hers, a soft kiss which caused them both to blush. They both tasted of chocolate and ginger cookies, still it was perfect.

"I love you." He whispered only for her.

Orihime caressed his cheek and smiled. "I love you too."

They stayed like that for the rest of the night, tangled in a warm embrace as the snow continued to fall outside.

[paperbagpetrichor]

Hey, I'm not sure if I've already sent you a request, if so I'm sorry, but I have an idea in my head. Could you do a Polnareff x female reader who's actually an enemy but she falls for Polnareff over time and Polnareff finds out she's an enemy? Thank you so much and have a nice day.

[ It’s all good! c: My apologies that this became so long, I had a lot of fun with this premise and I hope you enjoy nonetheless. ]

You’d been able to infiltrate the group fairly easily.  Stardust Crusaders, Lord Dio called them.  Sounded like space heroes destined to save the world, some cartoon show, some comic, anything but what they were.  All they really were was a pack of men sniffing around like bloodhounds around Lord Dio’s footholds.  By then a few of your allies had fallen at their hands, if their desire to end your superior wasn’t enough, and you found your mission one you couldn’t ensure the success of: join them.  Dio had trusted you enough to employ you as a spy.  Of course, the flesh bud he’d implanted into your forehead was more than enough a reign to pull you back should something go wrong, but you were the only one he was unwilling to spare as a simple cardboard minion, destined to fight the Crusaders yourself.  But unlike some of the prior workers, your orders weren’t to kill on sight.  No - you were to gain their trust.  Become their friends, get to know them.  Find out as much information as you could, about anything and everything, be it their dispositions, their victories, their successes, their obstacles, their plans; to distract them during battle, innocently enough so as to go unnoticed but long enough to allow your ally the upper hand.  

So far, all had been going well.  You’d been with them for a while, ever since their arrival in Singapore, where you had followed their trail and eventually gained their attention after creating a diversion during one of their battles with your stand.  Despite the time you gave, warning the others that you felt a presence coming from downstairs, opposite of where Devo was stationed, the man had still died at the hands of Polnareff.  With fear you continued to inform Dio of their victories, waiting for admonishment.  All you ever received was a stern warning.  A reminder that this was your job.  That no matter how everyone else may fail, you still must follow his orders and accomplish his goal.  And thus you did.  

Dio was already well-acquainted with Joseph due to their connection, but you informed your superior of the Joestar’s stand ability, noting that it was fairly weak in combat but could prove dangerous should he discover too much.  Since Jotaro was Joseph’s grandson, you had speculated Dio would know just as much of him, but their connection either wasn’t as strong or had been severed entirely, so you filled him in, noting Jotaro’s calculating mind, strong stand, the way he conducted himself in battle.  Both you and Dio agreed that his stand posed the most threat of the group.  There was the dog, Iggy, but no matter how much you attempted to notify Dio that his unpredictable nature could lead to unforeseen troubles, Dio simply shot you down.  According to him, the fact that Iggy didn’t always agree with the Crusaders’ goals - or perhaps simply didn’t care - was enough to discredit him, at least momentarily.  You fed whatever locations or plans the group traveled to or prepared for from Avdol, although even as he accepted you into the group, he wasn’t quite an open man.

That left the others.

The two who were - who had been - just like you.

Kakyoin and Polnareff.

Kakyoin had been the first to go.  When you received news that he’d switched sides, something cold had swept over your heart, jaw clenched, stiff as a board.  You hadn’t known him personally, or met him at all, for that matter, at the time, but the thought that someone could so easily betray a person who had offered them love, a family, a chance...it sickened you.  He would have been nothing without Dio’s help.  He still was nothing.  Nowhere near as motivated, or passionate, or dedicated to his new cause as he had been when under Dio’s control.  Of course, he’d been the first to lose to the group, so to some degree you weren’t surprised that he wasn’t all Dio had in mind for him.  

Then there was Polnareff, the second.  The last.  Although once more you’d never had direct contact with him, you had been in just the other room the day Dio had invited him in, speaking sweet wonders and promises to the Frenchman, guaranteeing that whatever he wanted, he could have.  You were currently overseeing the remnants of your group at that moment, but had paused to pick up the conversation.  His little sister, Sherry, had been brutally killed, by a man with two right hands - no doubt J. Geil, the man who had occupied a room beside you in Dio’s mansion, only further confirmed when you had witnessed his death at Polnareff’s hands not long after becoming a Crusader - and he sought revenge.  Little did he know that when he accepted Dio’s offer, the man he was searching for had been right under his nose.  Out of them all, it was easiest to get Polnareff talking, easy enough, in fact, that you could hardly find a way to shut him up at times.  But it was because of that the two of you had become closest in the group.  How odd.  You, ‘friends,’ with a man who had betrayed Dio, betrayed you...a man you would have to kill, if all else failed.  If not, a man you would have to let die along with the others.  

Nevertheless you maintained your end of the bargain and decided to blend in.  It was easy enough for you to put up with him if you thought not of his prior loyalty to you and Dio, and with time you found yourself starting to feel at ease - at least, as at ease one could be when a traitor to the ones around them - with him.  Something about his perception was admirable.  Almost always, he’d be the first to notice a stand user, or at least locate a stand.  His honor, even if he was beyond arrogant at times.  You found it funny.  Especially if another group member undermined him almost instantly, or else he received not applause but laughter as a response.  

And there was something else, too.  The way he’d look at you after every battle, concern in his eyes first, then drifting into pride as he realized you’d held your own.  You put it down easily enough to his desire for women’s attention.  After all, there was hardly ever a moment the two of you were out and about where he wasn’t speaking about everything he would love his significant other to have.  That was information certainly not worth sharing with Dio, but interesting nonetheless.  Someone pretty, of course, there wasn’t a chance he wouldn’t end up with someone unattractive (and as you listened to his list, you began to picture something like a placated sun goddess, falling to his every whim with an affectionate swoon), and loyal (ironic enough), and caring, who would love him forever and help him through whatever he may face, who he could talk to freely and completely be himself around, who would listen, who would admire him just as much, if not more, as he seemed to admire himself.

But whatever that ‘something’ was - you couldn’t have placed your finger on it before the battle with Midler, but after you would begin to have a growing suspicion - only expanded after you’d escaped from the grasps of the High Priestess.  Apparently Midler must’ve thought you were a little too close with the group, and focused on attacking you more so than her predetermined targets.  She’d tried everything she could think of to eliminate you.  And she’d nearly succeeded.  When you felt someone pulling your onto the surface, your mind blank and eyes half-open, breathing heavy and choked, you’d realized the loss of your oxygen tank and the deep cut that now ran from the corner of your mouth to your chest.  The first person you’d seen was him.  Polnareff was the one who’d saved you.

You shouldn’t have felt it.

You couldn’t have felt it.

It was wrong, so wrong, so very, truly, incredibly, undeniably wrong, but it was true, so true, so very, truly, incredibly, undeniably true.  The way your heart fluttered around him.  How you always seemed to be smiling when talking with him or thinking of him, how he occupied your mind.  The fact that he would always check up on you and your injury.  Those glances that you had previously caught now lingering as you made contact with them, and began doing the same to him.  Feelings that you’d never experienced before, but simply new, deep within your gut, as they spread across your body, were the beginning of love.  

And with time, you’d begun to shy away from Dio’s goals.  You still kept relaying the plans to him, but sometimes left out a few details, leaving more than just a bit in the dark.  In battles, you wouldn’t so actively attempt to divert the group’s attention.  You never lashed out with full power at your ‘enemy,’ but took your ‘act’ up a few notches, careful to make a few hits hurt when needed.  Somewhere in between your commitment to Dio and commitment to the Crusaders was the puzzling purgatory you lay in.  Swearing your allegiance to both.  Betraying both.  Eventually you weren’t Dio’s minion or a Stardust Crusader.  

You were just a girl in love.  With someone you never should’ve fallen for.

Somewhere you knew you would have to pick a side.  Stick with the man who had promised you all you had ever wanted, given you a place within his heart, appreciated you for who you were, desired to protect, ensured to care for you - or switch to the man who had fulfilled those promises.  Every step you now took was a weight upon your shoulders.  You were indecisive.  Weak.  Too stupid to realize that maybe if you stuck around a little longer, looked a little harder, opened up a little more, that you would find what you had been searching for: someone to love, someone who cared about you with all their heart and would never let harm befall you if they could help it.  Someone who loved you, too.

The time had come.

You had made your choice.

Polnareff had unsheathed the sword.  The stand.  And now, it had complete and total control over him.  You and Jotaro took your shots, Polnareff parried and returned his own, coming dangerously close to injuring you or the other man upon multiple occasions.  In truth you had no idea how much power the sword truly bore.  Even after Star Platinum had broken it, its power had still managed to surge through it like electricity, sparking into Polnareff in the blink of an eye and turning him back to his initial allegiance.  You weren’t sure how much damage the sword needed to sustain to release control of the Frenchman.  And you weren’t sure how much you’d have to damage Polnareff to stop it.  Your attacks remained in sync with Jotaro’s, each creating an opening for the other, even as your leg sustained a wound so deep you could barely manage to stand, and Jotaro was stabbed right in the stomach.  There.  That was the opportunity.  You had to chance it.  If you didn’t, you would never save Polnareff.  When Dio discovered it, he would kill you undoubtedly, with so much as a second thought.  You were just as disposable as everyone else he’d used, and you’d been an idiot not to recognize it sooner.  There wasn’t anything special about you.  Nothing that man - that monster - had ever said to you was genuine.  

But if you didn’t, the entire group might wind up falling to their deaths at Polnareff’s hands, or Polnareff falling to his at the hands of the others.  

As soon as the sword had broken Jotaro’s skin, your stand swung out, charging viciously at both sides of the weapon and entangling it within your hands, pinning it right where it stood, Polnareff’s hand still set on the handle, and you threw everything you had at it.  You didn’t even have to look to see it shatter.  The sound of glass hitting the ground was all you heard as something immobilized you where you stood, coursing through your blood like fire, cutting you like knives from within, desperate to escape.

And then there was nothing.

And then there was Polnareff.

You had no idea where you were.  A room, that much was obvious, but as to where, you were clueless.  A faint aching resounded near your forehead, but besides that, nothing else hurt.  You were still alive?  But - as you raised a hand to where the flesh bud had once buried itself within you - you felt nothing besides smooth skin.  The man beside you - everyone - had uncovered you.  And now you had to face him.

“You don’t have to wait,” you began quietly, jolting Polnareff from whatever stupor he was entangled in, “it’ll be easy to kill me now.  I can’t fight back.  I’d ask you to make it quick, but I know I don’t deserve that.”  A low laugh escaped you, somewhere in between relief and terror, acceptance and denial.  You hadn’t died at Dio’s hands, but it was now certain you’d die at one of the Crusaders’ attacks.  And considering only one was around, it didn’t take much, not at all, to guess who would end you.

His pause confused you.  You kept your eyes open, but only stared at the ceiling, either unwilling or unable to face him.  A sigh escaped him, followed by the sound of clothes rustling, and his voice.  “You’re safe,” he breathed, just barely making its way into your ears, only for your head to snap to his direction with confusion.

You grit your teeth and faced him.  It took everything you had to maintain a straight face, to not break down, to not scream, to not cry or yell.  “Why did you take me here?”  That was all you managed to escape you.

“Your leg was - ”

“Polnareff, that’s not what I’m talking about.  If we’re here now, you know exactly what I mean.”  Beneath the blankets your fists clenched, nails digging into your palms, barely aware of any of the physical pain as you prepared yourself for his response.

Once more he had another trick up his sleeve, shaking his head from side to side, resting an elbow atop your bed and placing his chin upon his palm, gazing down at you with pained blue eyes, expression tight but not singular, like whatever he was feeling was too complex for a simple look to convey it.  “Jotaro managed to get the bud out,” he began, taking a deep breath as something like a small smile formed on his lips, “and your leg’s going to be fine, too.”  The instant he saw you open your mouth, he silenced you, continuing, “[Y/n].  I need you to listen to me.”

Here it comes.  You were already prepared for it.  You’d been expecting it since the beginning - not just of awakening with him beside you, but ever since you joined the group, since you allied with Dio.  Expected it and accepted it.  There were some fights you simply couldn’t win.  And then there were those that you simply didn’t deserve to win.

What you were not prepared for, however, was for him to take your hand into his free arm, giving it a gentle squeeze.  When he spoke next, his voice was soft, quiet, so unlike his usual demeanor that it frightened you for more reasons than just one.  “It was successful.  You’re free from him now.  He can’t control you anymore.”  You blinked up at him with stunned eyes.  What was he doing?  You didn’t so much as have time to think beyond it as he let your hand go, instead trailing his along your now-smooth forehead, sweeping along it before falling to your side and taking your hand once more.  “I know.  I’ve been here before.  But I was alright.  And you’re going to be, too, [y/n].  None of us are going to hurt you.  They’ve seen this before, too.”  He paused for a moment and closed his eyes.  “The fact that you were able to fight against it - to save me...that was more than enough.  You’re one of us now.  And I couldn’t be more glad.”

Everything came far too fast far too quickly for you to piece it together, and it took you long to even begin to formulate a response, much less speak.  Your heart was in your mouth as you replayed his words.  You weren’t going to die here.  You weren’t a traitor, you weren’t out to get them.  You’d saved them.  Him.  And they were willing to look past everything...all caused by a stupid implant that caused hatred to boil in your blood.  They accepted you.  He accepted you.  “I - ” and it was then that you hit your breaking point, tears beginning to spill, “ - thank you.  So much.  I’m so glad that I...that you’re here, Polnareff.  You were willing t-to care.  Even for someone like, like me.”

“Of course I care,” he relented, tucking a stray stand of your hair that fluttered just above your eye back behind your ear, touch disappearing for a moment and eyes breaking from yours before returning, something new within them, warm, and passionate, something you’d never seen in him before.  “I love you, [y/n].”

You most certainly didn’t look pretty.  Sweat had beaded down your tired face, hair matted and messy, absolutely nothing like the sun, much less like a goddess.  To hell with loyalty.  You’d broken it, after all.  Caring?  About as caring as to let him die, sure.  Who would help him, who could listen to him, who he could be himself around...you were a traitor.  Of course he couldn’t let you do anything of that, or he let himself do around you.

“I can’t apologize enough.  All I can...I’m sorry, Polnareff, I-I’m so sorry.  I...love you.”

But you did admire him.  Even more than he seemed to admire himself.  And as you wrapped your arms around him, sinking into his embrace, savoring his forbidden touch that was now all yours, all free, all open, no more secrets, no more hiding, no more lying, him thumbing away your tears, you knew it all to be true.

You didn’t need to be Dio’s minion.  You didn’t need to fit Polnareff’s dream girl description.

All you needed to do was be yourself, against him, a new future more promising than ever beginning to crest the horizon.

[blindspot-repata]

High School Blindspot - Chapter 8

Prom is the senior year graduation party in the USA. In the story, the correct chronology of this event was not obeyed, because there the party is at the beginning of the year and not at the end as I put it in the fic, because for that date I used the academic year of my country.

I would like to thank Carla (@caizalucca ) for her collaboration with part I of this chapter, which was entirely hers!

Hope you like it!

_____________________________

Prom - Part I

Ellen ...

Ellen Brigs didn't welcome her children's excitement at the school dance. He had devoted the best years of their lives to those brothers and had plans for them. The way they learned to channel their anger into physical strength and determination to survive in the illegal orphanage where they spent their childhood would make them the best soldiers for the cause she championed. Ordinary social activities like this ball would only take you out of focus on the really important things.

She didn't even care much about Roman. He knew that he would easily convince him to put these frivolities aside in the future. But Remi ... Remi was different from his brother. Much harder to fold. And there was this guy that he was getting involved with. Definitely inappropriate and dangerous. This Kurt guy was a threat to Remi's future, planting fantasies in her head like love being more important than her duties before her country. Ellen knew how this type of teenager saw life: any stable job would be an excuse to start a family. One day she was innocent as well. But she wouldn't let that keep Remi from the bright future he dreamed of for her daughter. No prom. And the change would take her away from Kurt.

An extra study plan. That was the strategy she used to justify Roman's going to the party while Remi stayed home. The consequences of this, Ellen had also predicted: several discussions, countless questions, resistance from her daughter. She handled it as she always did: reminding Remi that if she hadn't adopted them and taken full responsibility for them, the brothers would have been executed when the orphanage was discovered to be considered too lethal for life in society.

Remi...

Remi did everything in her power to convince Ellen that this extra study plan was unnecessary and that she could perfectly go to the dance without it affecting her performance. But it was in vain. The mother was adamant. She came to think of a direct affront, but when the rescue from the orphanage was brought on the agenda, she was silent. Ellen would always be grateful for taking them out of that hell and saving their lives. He thought of sending a note to Kurt through Patterson warning him of his absence, but she never did. There was still a tiny flame of hope inside her that kept her from burying the dream of one last meeting with him before the move and the party was her big chance.

On the day of the event, she dedicated herself to her studies even more diligently. She stayed cool with Ellen because she knew her mother would be suspicious if she acted otherwise. When he managed to finish the extensive to-do list, it was too late. The dance should have started almost an hour ago. It would have to be more than discreet, imperceptible. She prepared the bed with pillows under the blankets for her mother to think she was sleeping. She would go out the window and return without being noticed.

She didn't have a dress or any clothes like the ones the girls wore on those occasions. A flash of discomfort passed through her as she realized this. But she didn’t give up. Clothes would never determine their destiny. She wore dark jeans, a black blouse, and a leather jacket. The pencil in the eyes and the leather choker closed the look before sneaking out the window.

When she entered the party room, everyone looked at her. Remi knew that it was not her angelic beauty that called attention, but the inappropriate clothing. She took a deep breath and covered everything with her eyes in search of Kurt. He was at a table with Allie, visibly restless. That singular way of scratching the back of his neck gave him away. The gibberish soon made him look in her direction. And the smile on his face gave her the certainty that she did the right thing by deceiving her mother and coming even though she was dressed disgustingly in the eyes of the rest of her schoolmates.

He almost ran to meet her.

“Hi... I was already thinking that you wouldn't come.” he said with that crooked smile that always broke Remi's heart.

“I said I'd come.” she also replied with a rare smile.

“Would you like to drink something?” He asked

“I’d like...”

He led her by the arm to the drinks table and served them both. They were still the center of attention and it started to bother Remi a lot. If they were the subject of the next day at school, Ellen could find out and be in trouble with her mother. Kurt noticed his discomfort:

“Do you want to talk in a more discreet place?”

She nodded and left the room.

Outside, the night was dark. Kurt pulled her into his arms and Remi allowed herself to enjoy that moment with him closing his eyes. When she felt energized enough to get out of that hug, she said:

“I know that this outfit is not suitable...”

“I don't care about the clothes you wear. I'm glad you came.”

“Look, I'm not any kind of rebel without cause trying to get attention by appearing here dressed like this...”

“I didn't think that, I swear.” he tried to position himself.

“But the others thought. Ellen didn’t agree that I would come. I left hidden. If I had a dress, I would have put it on, but I didn't have it. And... Wow, the girls are beautiful, especially Allie.”

“You are still the most beautiful of the party even without a dress.” he said, pulling her back into his arms and now putting his lips together in a kiss. Her heart sank with everything he said, it shouldn't have been easy.

The two surrendered to the moment, enjoying each kiss and all the forms of affection they exchanged. They talked banal things. They laughed a little. They looked at the moon. Everything seemed perfect. But he noticed that sometimes, her eyes filled with sadness. He knew it had something to do with her mother and decided to show how much he was willing to fight for her:

“Remi, tomorrow I'm going to your house. I'm going to talk to your mother and show her that, despite going to military school next year, I want to stay with you. She will see that I have good intentions...”

“No! You can’t do that. Ellen would never understand.”

“But I'm worried about you. Your mother suffocates you too much with this study routine. This is not normal.”

“Ellen just wants our good. Roman and I owe her loyalty for taking us out of the orphanage.”

“Remi, I understand that you are grateful to her for this, but you need to agree that this is all very strange. The link that unites a family must be love and not loyalty. Ellen seems to want total devotion from you, and that is not true. She doesn't even let you call her mom.”

“I know everything seems strange, but it's just her way. You have no idea what we went through at the orphanage and what could have happened to us.”

“Okay, she got them out of there, but that's no reason to stop you from living in the present. And the present is us. She needs to understand this.”

“Kurt, being with you is the best thing I've ever experienced, but that is above us. Ellen's work is important and she is preparing me to help her. I owe it to her. What I wanted most was to owe her nothing to be able to face her with all of this, but I can't. And there's Roman, he needs me there too.”

“I will repeat again: Ellen has no right to steal from you the rest of her life. You are not alone in this, Remi. I'm with you. We will fight and get together. Tomorrow I will talk to your mother and make her understand this.”

“No, Kurt, please don't.”

“Why not?”

“There is a lot about the past and the future that I can't tell you. And talking to Ellen wouldn't change anything. We're going to move, Kurt, and I don't even know where. Her job is like that. This is our last night together, that's why I risked so much to be here with you.”

“Our last meeting? And are you just telling me this now?” Kurt stood up impatiently.

“I wanted to tell you, but she took me away from school...”

“Then let's run away. Today! I will not let her separate us. I drop out of military school and get a job.”

“No! You are aware of what you are saying. Military school is your dream. I would never forgive myself for that. And there's Roman, I can't leave him. I'm sorry, Kurt.”

“You are more important to me than any dream.” he said sadly. “But apparently, I don't mean the same thing to you, do I?”

Remi wanted to scream that he was the person she loved the most in the world and kiss him so that she could feel how immense her love was, but she knew there was no hope for them. Ellen wouldn’t accept that relationship and wasn’t willing to see him sacrificing his dreams for a life without a future with her. Her mother always said that the psychological consequences left by the orphanage would make it risky to start a family because sooner or later it would hurt everyone around her. For all this, the words that came out of her lips said the opposite of what she had in her heart:

“Everything between us ends here, Kurt. It was a mistake that I came. I don't expect you to understand, but...” and afraid of betraying, she shut up the rest of the sentence “Good night.”

And she left him alone.

Kurt came back inside the ball feeling disappointed and deceived. Allie came to her and offered her company as a comfort. He accepted.

Remi walked for two blocks almost in a trance trying to contain the urge to cry. And suddenly, her feet no longer obeyed her. Nothing about her obeyed her rational side. In a rush, she turned and ran back to the party. She would find Kurt and say she was willing to risk everything for him.

But she barely entered the room and saw the saddest scene of her life. To the sound of slow music, everyone danced on the dance floor with their bodies glued together. Kurt and Allie, however, were standing still, exchanging kisses that seemed like it would never end.

Stunned, Remi turned her back on the salon and any hope that she might have a normal life. This wasn’t for her. Ellen was right.

_______________________

Prom - Part II

“Wow!” Edgar sighed at the image in front of him. She looked wonderful in the navy blue knit dress with only one strap and went down just to the knee, the platform sandal made her a little taller, her hair parted in the middle and her curls fell over her shoulders, the light makeup only highlighted her eyes, skin tones and a pink lip gloss added the finishing touch.

“What's it?” Edgar wasn’t bad at all in a smoking, white shirt and bow tie. He had grown the goatee in the past few days and she was thinking it charming. Natasha blushed at the penetrating way he looked at her, he had the gift of leaving her like this. The girl was very much in love with him and knew that this love hurt, as much as she was sure about his feeling for her there was an imminent separation due to the boy's departure for college. Maybe it would be good for them to stay away for a while, as their dependence grew and in the last few months they didn’t have a day that they didn’t meet and each moment together made the desire to be close to each other even more. It didn't look healthy.

“You look so beautiful.” She was already beautiful, but managed to stay even more, Natasha had a genuine sweetness that together with the suspicious look that showed made up her personality. Edgar regretted having to go to college. He didn't want to leave everything behind, but he knew it was necessary, his future was at stake and also a chance to build a life with Natasha even though he had to sacrifice himself now. Edgar came out of the trance and greeted her with a kiss on the forehead and can delight in her scent, which was always wonderful. She was the apple of his eye, the girl of his dreams, he would give the world to see her happy and he knew he would do anything for her and think that he could hurt her with distance made him sad and made him want even more being close to her these last few days making sure to make it clear how great his feelings were for her. “Let's go?”

It was Edgar's graduation party. Natasha still had another year at school and would be preparing intensely for NYPD tests which was now her life goal. She felt sad about having to stay away from her boyfriend, but she knew it would be good for him to grow up personally and professionally. They were both doing well and she wasn't sure how they would get together when they were away, but she hoped everything would work out. After the end of the year parties they would say goodbye and she hoped that the time would pass slowly to enjoy every moment that remained beside him, because she knew that after he left the time apart would be long and always scarce when they were together.

When they arrived at the party the music was already playing and most of the guests had already arrived, they sat at the table with their friends where they didn’t stay for a long time, because they really wanted to enjoy the party together. On the dance floor the two moved more to the sound of their hearts than to the music itself, from time to time they looked into each other's eyes and exchanged complicit smiles and also kisses.

Dinner was served and they returned to their friends. They knew that these moments together were numbered because with the school year ending each one would go on their way finding new friends. But those years together would never be forgotten, the games, the complicity, the learnings, everything that lived until then was important for the construction of the personality of each one of them.

Patty was graduating managed to get Roman to go with her and the two of them were dancing awkwardly when they gave up on the dance floor and chose to entertain themselves in another way. The kisses exchanged between the two left them yearning for more, but Roman respected her and felt that they shouldn't go any further knowing that he would be leaving soon. The boy realized when his sister had come to the party even without Ellen's consent, but he was quiet, she knew what to do with her own life. The boy also saw when Kurt returned without her and clung to the blonde cheerleader. The disagreement must have been ugly, because he knew how attached the boy was to his sister.

The party was over before midnight and Edgar took Natasha over to his house. The first night they spent together where his mother acted naturally when she learned that the two were sleeping together, after Natasha left she read a sermon to her son to make him understand how much a girl deserved to be respected. Edgar swore that he loved Tasha and had the best intentions that a boy could have with a girl. After a few days Emma called Natasha to talk and told her several things about sex, illness, unexpected pregnancy and made an appointment with a doctor she trusted so she could do some tests and choose a contraceptive method.

Later that night after making love they were both holding each other when Edgar looked at her with those little dog eyes that she loved. Sweetly, he traced the girl's bare shoulder lazily beside him with his fingers. That touch gave him the slight shivers that he noticed and continued to do.

“My God! That's what I'll miss most in this life!” Edgar felt a lump grow in his throat and closed his eyes to fix the image of her in his mind.

“You will always come home.”

“Yes, but do you have any idea what two, three months are away from you?” Edgar saw the eyes of the girl he loved turn red with tears.

“I know, Ed. But it will fly and we will have so many things to occupy ourselves that we won't even notice the time passing.” Tears fell from Natasha's eyes, who made no effort to stop them. They hugged each other very tight and she can hear the boy's sobs in her ear. “I love you and nothing will change that and I know you love me too.”

The two continued to embrace between sobs and kisses until they calmed down and fell asleep. It was just before the end of the year and as much as it hurt they were sure it would be worth it. Their feeling seemed strong enough to face the distance.

[herr-aka-somecutenerd]

Sorrow.

I hate to do this since I didn't want my blog to be a place I would write my uh... depressive stuff. But right now I'm in a terrible emotional pain. TW: possible swearing, unhappy vent, problems and emotionally pressuring stuff

I'm so fucking tired. I didn't feel well these days. Mostly because of weather, sleeping troubles, other physical stuff that worsened my mental state a little. If I hadn't my parents that would probably be even worse. But anyway. Every time I try to be happy, cheer up myself at least a little, soon or late it becomes worse. I don't know, maybe it's just unlucky day, probably I just focus on it too much, anyway. Some stuff accumulated these days, and today was the culmination. I cried so much today, it was too much. Firstly I remembered about my close friend being rude (to say the least) out of sudden with me when I've done nothing. They're probably under affection of their mental disorder again, tho they're refusing it, but I don't see any other explanation for their behaviour. I feel betrayed, because earlier they say they don't want our relationship to be abusive because of them (they did stuff some time ago that was abusive due to their disorder). Today I've talked to them and nothing changed. And they hurted me again. Well, at least they finally got in touch with their therapist and talked about seanse... There are many things I don't know how to tell about. I don't know if I should. Every time I want to talk about my stuff I remember that my friends have problems as well. I don't want to cause more. Even if I want to talk so much, I don't know what to say and should I at all, even when I'm saying I say less than I'd probably like to. I'm so tired of noise in my head. So tired of my intrusive thoughts. Of my delusions. I'm tired to expect something to happen and being anxious. I'm so tired of feeling alone so often. I'm so tired of being unable to do everything I'd like to. I'm so tired of mood swings. I'm so tired of crying. I try to be here for everyone who I love, sometimes ignoring my own pain, being silent about it. Will here be someone for me? Someone besides my parents? Someone who would check me daily, who would remind me that everything is actually okay and I'm being delusional again? Someone who would bring me back to reality, away from my delusions and anxiety? Do I deserve to be happy? I guess I just don't value everything I already have enough. I can't stop crying. I'm so tired of losing friends. I'm so tired of my perfectionism. I'm so tired of trust problems. I'm so tired of thinking that people around me probably don't like me. I'm so tired of thinking that people around me wouldn't feel the difference if I'd disappear. I'm so tired of thinking that I can be accepted, loved and appreciated only when I'm in a good mood.