#but i've caused them so much trouble already. i feel like i'm betraying them if i grow up.

[anaalnathrakhs]

uh oh i feel like i have a deeply maladaptative response to people knowing Literally Anything about me it's fine it's fine i'm handling it very well

[shinobus-unbreakable-spirit]

what if Yoriichi gets jealous because his s/o being flirt by other man? like, how would he react?😃

Oooooo. I've already written the opposite scenario, so it'll be interesting to see how things are from the other way around. I think I'm going to do this one in a headcanon format! I hope that works for ya~

Yoriichi as a Jealous S/O

To begin with, he wouldn't vocalize his jealousy at all. His S/O would only be able to tell he's jealous by the way he stares daggers at the other man and acts cold whenever he's brought up

It depends how assertively the man flirts. If it's ambiguous whether he's actually flirting or just being friendly, Yoriichi would let him off the hook. However, if the other man straight up hit on his S/O, he would show a shade of possessiveness by stepping in and telling the man, firmly, to never hit on them again

Generally Yoriichi controls his emotions quite well, but jealousy is one he would struggle with. His S/O would be able to tell something is off by his body language, how he shuts off at the mere mention of this other man. Then, if his S/O confronted him about it, he'd come clean about his feelings, admitting that he simply cannot stand the thought of S/O being with anyone else and he's battling these emotions every day

He would feel some guilt about his jealousy, as it makes it seem like he doesn't trust his S/O. He would reassure his S/O that he completely trusts them to be faithful, but he simply doesn't trust the man to not put his S/O in uncomfortable situations by trying to make a move on them

He would have frequent intrusive thoughts about his S/O cheating on him for this other man, and that would be what bothers him most. The idea of his S/O actually betraying his trust like that. The sheer thought of it would have him falling to the ground and folding in two, clutching at his chest. He would only be able to console himself by doing about the only thing that'd bring his mind tranquility, which is practicing his swordfighting in his garden and focusing on his breathing

If things went on long enough, he would one day tell his S/O the truth about how the other man makes him feel. It would happen quite randomly; as he and his S/O enjoy a cup of green tea together, he would tell them everything. He was usually so quiet, but he wouldn't be able to bottle his emotions up forever, so he would tell them, relaxed, without leaking an ounce of actual emotion, simply laying down the facts so that his S/O knows where his head is at

Despite how much he dislikes his S/O's relationship with this flirty other man, he wouldn't dissuade his S/O from being friends with him as he recognizes that'd be a controlling move and he doesn't want his S/O to lose out on any friends just because he's unable to control his jealousy

He'd mostly blame himself for his jealousy. However, if the man ever tried to make a move on his S/O, Yoriichi would definitely step in and scorn the man for trying to take someone who's already in a relationship, as this is a very dishonorable move and Yoriichi is all about honor. In fact, I think that's one of the things that'd bother him most of all, that the idea of someone trying to take his S/O is so dishonorable and sneaky that it makes him feel sick

Ultimately, Yoriichi would get jealous and it would hurt him, but with good communication between him and his S/O, they could work through it as his trust and devotion for his S/O would be far beyond his feelings of envy. That being said, he would step in and behave possessively if someone tried it on with his S/O ----- I hope this was a good interpretation of the situation, anon! I think Yoriichi is a really kind and reasonable man who wouldn't want to cause too much trouble for his partner, even if he was going through intense bouts of jealousy. I'm confident that he'd be committed to working things out, too. Thank you for the ask! <3

[breitzbachbea]

Will my heart stop pounding?

The dark of the staircase, no light in the terraced house's corridor, all doors closed as he left them. Outside, he could hear Colin drive off.

"I'm sorry you have to do this," he had told him, embarassed, as he sat on the backseat. "You have better things to do."

"Oh, it's no bother," he had told him, Antrim accent thick. "I'll gladly keep you safe."

Keep him safe while he fooled around. Aye, that's all this was. Fooling around. Feeling alive. Make the seconds left on this earth actually precious.

It was burnt into his mind, Michele lascivous among the sheets, on his side, so deliberately covering his lower half while he showed off his chest. Sweaty and ruffled from their frotting, shifting, bodies never close enough to satisfy the ache.

A shudder ran through him. Thank God, Soph was in Armagh.

"I'm going to be cold here," Michele said. "Wither like the trees outside."

"It's not September yet," Harry had replied while he buckled his belt.

Only the rustle of sheets. "I am gonna miss you."

"Only for a few hours," Harry found himself reassuring what had to be described as his lover.

"Already too much. I'll lie here in the morning and still remember your body next to me, only to find a cold and empty spot." All said in a tone that did not betray true, deep sadness. All a ploy to get him out of his clothes again and under the covers. A Siren call.

"I don't want to cause trouble, that's all, Michele." He did walk over to the bed again, crawled onto it to kiss the man. And by god, what a kiss, what a sweet experience to have the other linger on his lips, suck in the bottom one, taste him with the tip of his tongue and oh so gently release him. "Your hotel's too fancy for that."

Michele made a sound of disbelief at that, something between a purr and a tut as he ran his fingers through Harry's hair, oh so slowly and deliberate. "You don't care for trouble to get what you want, Signor O'Connel."

"Aye, I do a bit," he lied. "I've also got other stuff to do tomorrow before our meeting. You know that, Darling."

"I do." Michele breathed against his lips, Harry's heart pounded in his ears. But Michele only sighed and Harry swallowed, able to rip himself away. Only then Michele said: "One last kiss goodnight, per piacere, carinu."

Could not deny him that. Of course not. Head tilted, their lips matched perfectly, as he pushed his tongue into Michele's mouth to let it linger, let it flick against the other's, let it be some all too temporary unity.

Finally off the bed and almost at the door, he heard: "Buonanotte, Beddu. Sogni d'Oro. Dream of me."

Harry was weak in his knees as he leant against his front door, eyelashes fluttering and heart hammering worse against his ribcage than a rival during a Hurling match.

Michele huddled into the sheets, the dull golden eyes half-open, deep and perfectly tanned skin glowing against the white sheets. The curve of his body underneath them, outline of flesh and bone, soft skin, a beautiful soft, giving, round arse, those supple thighs, the waist he just wanted to lay hands on --

He sucked in air through his nose and tried to ground himself, deep and irregular breaths through his mouth. God, when was the last time he'd been so alive? The last time someone had been so burnt into his mind's eye? Hannah, perhaps, but he had not once allowed himself to indulge in that. Forbidden, wrong, pointless it had felt.

He stumbled up the stairs and clung to the railing. Doing shit, his hole. He hoped he would catch any sleep at all, his bed so empty and cold. It was the end of August.

[nerendus]

Datability/Fuckability of every Bloodborne boss

You know how it is....

Cleric Beast — First boss of the game and very simple. He's quite the acrobatic, and is permanently burned into my mind whenever I walk across the bridge. He has a lovely voice that he uses to scream at me from the very beginning of the game. 7/10.

Father Gascoigne — Do I really need to say anything..... Deep voice, bloody, tall, DILF, religious man. Being able to summon him in Central Yharnam and just twirl your hair at how tall he is..... Don't worry about his wife. His wife's dead. And his children need a new mom and I've already accidentally killed them, so there is absolutely nothing in the way of our fucked up bloody romance. 10/10.

Blood-starved Beast — You know..... I'll give them points for being in one of my favourite locations (the chapel, not exactly Old Yharnam), but the poison sweeping from every orifice of their body really is a major turn off. I love their mangly and skinned look, but I would rather not die while cuddling. 4/10.

Vicar Amelia — Probably the first boss to give me genuine trouble, but I'm alright with that! She was a very beautiful human woman and became an even more beautiful Borzoi woman. Even in her transformed state, she still holds firm to her values and religion, so she would never betray me just because now she's able to scream really loud. Her friends outside really don't approve of the relationship, but there's nothing more juicier than a forbidden relationship. 8/10.

Witches of Hemick — I'm not saying yes for her, she isn't really my type (her eyes are a little...too much), but the Mad Ones in the polycule are extremely lovely and I want them to hold me in their arms and protect me from all danger. 5/10.

Shadows of Yharnam — YES! MY DUDES! Seeing three robed guys slowly creep into view from the fog is already enough to make a lass swoon, but with the added Nazgul effect of them and just the overall fact that they are Pthumerian makes me so desperately be in the middle of whatever they got going on. Don't worry, the Queen will be fine on her own, she's already dead anyhow. 10/10.

Rom, the Vacuous Spider — MILF, loyal children, loyal to the cause that made her turn into a mindless cosmic spider at the bottom of the lake. Her very tiny legs are kinda silly, and I don't really have that much attraction to her, but I think we could be besties. 4/10.

Amygdala — YES! WOMAN ALIEN MOMENT! She is seven arms of beauty. There are two particular variations that I'm obsessed with: passed the Yahar'gul Chapel lamp, there's a lass that is...extremely dangerously hanging from one of the buildings, and a few of her arms are just dangling without any purpose as she just lazily looks down at us. The other one is back up the way we came, passed The Girls, and she's just clinging to the bars over this walkway, and you can get so close to her and see her heartbeat and she just stares down at you with all her tentacles and it makes my heart blush. 100/10.

Laurence, First Vicar — His human form, even though we just hear his voice, is an automatic yes, but this isn't about him, it's about his fucked up flaming transformation version. From the moment of the boss intro, it's obvious that he's just having a bad hangover, and I feel for him! I'll get a washrag and damped the flames before giving him a full bottle of Ibuprofen (I feel like he'd need all that) and taking a cuddle break with him on the altar. 8/10.

Ludwig, the Holy Blade — Honestly....his second phase is sorta attractive, but he really just gives me dad vibes instead of husband vibes. 2/10.

This is the end of Tumblr post due to photo limit, second part will be reblogged!

[omgkalyppso]

I've mentioned this before but here's screenshots and elaboration on a moment Étoile would have needed to isolate for peace of mind.

Étoile started their journey as a Neutral Good Oath of Devotion Paladin, at which time they said, and meant, that they wouldn't sign their soul away to a devil just for physical security in relation to the mindflayer parasite. By Act 3, their oath is broken, their alignment is in flux, and their patience with the dream visitor has worn more than thin. They felt they were being used through the parasite, as any actions they took, any thoughts they had, any motivations they pursued, had to run through the filter of an ever-present ... visitor.

Raphael offered them a way out of that, and to take the source of all their troubles off of the Material Plane. They felt zero concern at the time for how the wars in the Hells progressed, and well, I didn't have Gale or Karlach in the party so I the player didn't really have anyone immediately rejecting this proposal. To top it all off, Étoile vastly liked Lae'zel over the dream visitor.

But after Étoile signed Raphael's contract, and Astarion said:

When moments, hours before:

Étoile felt very isolated — and used, and stupid, and that's probably the biggest factor in regards to when Étoile might want to be alone to recenter: when they feel foolish or incapable of intellectually or emotionally dealing with a problem.

Contrary to the screenshot expression, I think as soon as the words "what should I care" passed Astarion's lips that he saw in Étoile's expression just how much of a wrong thing to say that was. If you talk to him immediately after this, he's back to his lovey-dovey, "Yes, my dear? What is it?" So canon expects me to blow past this which means I elaborate how I like.

Étoile was already made uncomfortable by some of the phrasing in Astarion's confession (if I'm keeping it as-is) in Act 2. They could see how centered they were becoming in Astarion's (otherwise) "independence" from Cazador and general perspectives of love and life, which would cause them to question whether Astarion recognizing that if their soul is fucked that it's none of his business - is a good thing. Meanwhile also they also felt betrayed, that they are "a team" when he needs their help, but that any problems they have are not his concern. Besides all that, after everything with Wyll and then Astarion's confession of initially setting out to use them ...

Étoile wouldn't have objected to a more boundaried agreement between them, and so to still feel used now with no guarantees or understanding between them ... and to not know whether it was something Astarion had meant to do or which was an accident of habit — because a single confession and apology is generally not enough to change one's nature / comportment / attitude they've kept for centuries— It would be hard for Étoile to rationalize a response to Astarion's assertion. They would want to be left alone to think.

It isn't the next long rest, but a few days later (after Wyll's pact is broken) that I have this blocked dialogue from Étoile to Astarion's response for how it could benefit Wyll:

Étoile: He's not ready for that. To hear it, I mean. If the Council accepts him, I'm sure Wyll would be very fit to rule. Astarion: You don't make that sound very complimentary? Étoile: I'm simply … soured. Astarion: From … from before? Darling, I— Étoile. I'm sorry. For what I said. I am … unaccustomed to offering comfort or kindness, to being needed, to even recognizing what that might look like. Étoile: It's not your fault. Will you feed on me tonight? Astarion: I was hoping you'd ask. Étoile: I've been thinking about it since earlier. I thought that, if I was disposable in other circumstances, at least I could be close to you in this. It's alright. Having choice means you get to choose how things end or evolve, and I just have apprehension about being a suboptimal choice. Astarion: I've told you that I never expected to choose you, to choose this, for myself. The risks you take? The way you care for others? You wouldn't have been my first choice. But… Now you are, and I don't only follow you because it's easy. I have no wish to discard you. I need you with me. Please, forgive me? Étoile: I forgave you even when I hadn't expected you to say all that. You need me with you? You need only ask.

This would only be the fourth time in my playthrough I had Astarion feed on Étoile and it was for this fucking roleplay reason. Astarion otherwise had to live on mouthfuls obtained in combat since that was enough to give him the Happy buff.

It was also the night Leon and Aurelia come to call. Which I think is hilarious.

Reassurance is a double sided sword.

Étoile would have let him kill his siblings, they would have trusted his judgment on that. But the number of spawn was too much for them to reconcile.

[thegroovyboar]

II - The Celestial Knight

.

.

"What are thou willing to sacrifice to respect all weaknesses, and constitute thyself as the defender of them ?  shalt thou be generous and give largesses to everyone, in cost of thy heart, exposed and undefended in front of the world's cruelty ? Be aware, because thy same sword you wield to guard thine neighbor could be the one that will cause thou the bloodiest of wounds."

.

The celestial knight, the second prompt, gave me some troubles. it was the only one for that I hadn't a clear concept in my mind ( when I feel inspired to draw something I have already a very clear image in my head of what it's gonna look which is both a curse and a blessing). In the end I thought about how a knight should be an emblem of sacrifice to "protect the innocent" as stated by the code of chivalry. I have to say that even if I talk about protection, I think about it more like a metaphor for altruism in general, event in the smaller things.

Generosity and altruism are definetely rare traits in nowadays society and lifestyle, because of how self centered and individualistic we've becomed, so I feel that genuine altruist people seems very special... but also destined to be disappointed and sometime even betrayed in their kindness. it's a pity, but as a very selfish person myself it's something I don't fully understand. It definetely takes a great strenght to be kind in these days.

for the art, it took me a lot of time to finish this one. Reflective and metal surfaces like armor it's always a pain in the ass. I'm not sure if I was able to really obtain the shininess of the metal. One thing I'm very happy with thought, it's how the figure of the knight seems to shine of bright light in the darker backgroung. let's be honest, there isn't much of "celestial" here. I've just thrown here and there some stars and called it done, because I was more invested in my whole stabbed in the back concept. the backgrounf is made in watercolor graphite which was absolutely perfect for a space/ night texture. The anatomy is... bad. but back anatomy is something I've never really studied well. all in all i'm happy with this one.

[fabdante]

Got this idea from thinking about what a reboot version of Temen-ni-gru could be like. I like the idea of it maybe being a combo between rescuing Sparda from where ever Mundus banished him and the plot of DMC3, where the purpose of Temen-ni-gru is basically to seal not only a gate to the Underworld, but also the Force Edge/Sparda. Gonna focus on the latter, just because that's easier to know what to do with than reboot Sparda. Maybe you need Sparda, alive or at least out of where ever Mundus banished him to, to get the Force Edge/Devil Sword Sparda out of him?

I don't think you'd need Arkham for the reboot's version of DMC3/Temen-ni-gru, just because I think reboot Vergil could fill the role well enough himself. Maybe with some demonic armor, since he's King of Hell now?

(Maybe Kat could be involved too, helping Dante solve puzzles and navigate the tower? Assuming her magical abilities have jumped from "astral projection and seeing into Limbo" to "being able to cast Fireball", I mean. Unless you want to give her a rocket launcher. I'm more partial to giving her a Kablooey, but whichever works best for her.)

Mainly I wanna focus on character stuff- in this case, for Dante. Doppleganger the Deathvoid didn't do much as a test of character for DMC3 Dante, since preboot Dante was already kinda far enough along in his character development that he didn't need another test, but I feel like with what we see of dopplegangers in Vergil's Downfall (or whatever Hollow Vergil really was), you could have some fun with it. Especially if Vergil is here, especially if he's trying to manipulate Dante into helping him undo the seal on Temen-ni-gru and get the Force Edge/the Sparda.

The twins' amulets in the preboot don't have any kind of "security measure" (I guess you could call it) where they only respond to a certain twin, but apparently the reboot twins' amulets DO, so maybe reboot Vergil needs Dante to go along with him for whatever he's planning? At least as far as getting Dante's amulet to do what Vergil wants it to do, anyway.

I feel like you could have some fun with the blood ritual, too, in terms of like, exploring how Vergil is using his brother and how that makes Dante feel (bad; angry and hurt and betrayed, and its all the worse because/if reboot Dante really HAD hoped his brother was trying to connect with him again and make amends), and how Vergil thinks he doesn't "need" his brother/family any more because he's got more power now, and that's all that he thinks matters.

Idk, just. Mostly trying to dig into reboot Dante's character more. I keep thinking of him with issues with self-worth, like he sees himself as a tool, as something to be used (cause I mean, *gestures to Limbo City* living in a capitalistic hellscape'll do that to ya) only really good at killing demons. That and a sense of foreshortened future, since he probably thought he'd be dead from the demons by now, and even with Mundus gone, they're still probably hunting him, so he probably has trouble trying to live a "normal" life with Kat. Or at least as "normal" a life as they can have, being demon hunters and all.

Idk. What do you think?

Ok so firstly I want to say this is all really fun! I do think the plot of DMC3 ties in pretty easily into the reboot honestly and I'm surprised more people don't do anything with the concept. And I like it more then uh...the 'leaked' sequel idea that floats around every few years.

That and I always like the idea of Vergil going and finding Sparda and how it would be for Sparda to come back all these years later and see what became of his sons, given he was the one who decided to memory wipe them and separate them and everything.

My thoughts for a DmC2/reboot version of 3 are admittedly very swayed by my love of Kat/Vergil. I have jokingly referred to it as a gothic romance set in the ruins of the Order a few months after the end of the game. I've never had a full plotline for the concept but me and my girlfriend have discussed the idea of it being pretty loosely based around 3. Like there's still the tower of course, but this time around it's more Vergil's decided to come back from hell with his new demon king powers and army and stake claim and he creates a tower out of the ruins of the Order as a sort of home base which Dante and Kat then have to go through to find him. Which then would lead to a lot of fun character dynamics and tensions (also a lot more Kat being active in the plot and ideally playable at times).

I'm also curious how the fall of Limbo would impact Kat's powers. Like I imagine she still has them and they might work for other layers of hell, but I wonder if losing Limbo would like...untether her a bit and make her abilities stronger, since there's no longer that veil there between her and Limbo. Plus she can probably make stronger spells if she can get the right stuff.

[girldragongizzard]

@fukurouonthesea, you are so cool. Thank you for providing questions I can answer, in case other people are confused, too.

Also: hi! How was your day?

Unfortunately, it's been rough. Our physical health has been really crummy, lately. But, despite that, I'm already writing the sequel to this book, and having a lot of fun doing it. So, it's also been good.

What does she mean with the clothes telegraphing? Like, Chapman can do things, so people who know that might be suspicious of someone dressed like Chapman?

"Telegraphing" in this use is probably jargon I picked up from studying a tiny bit of martial arts, and it is probably an odd use of the word.

It means "revealing", "telling", or "betraying". A telegraphed move in a fight is one that the opponent can predict by your body language and stance, like, "Oh, you're stepping like that, so you're going to do an uppercut."

In this case, the colors of the clothes are nearly identical to the colors of my scales. So, anyone who knows I'm walking about in a disguise, but who hasn't seen the disguise yet, will probably be able to pick me out in a crowded room because I'm dressed in clothes with the same colors.

That was the worry.

It turns out it was a frivolous worry, because no one caught me while wearing the dress.

What's proso - the thingy?

Prosopagnosia is also called face blindness. I try not to call it face blindness, though, because some blind people have objected to that term and I want to respect that.

I often can't recognize people by their faces. It doesn't come up in the story too much, because I'm mostly interacting with people I know well, who dress distinctively, in contexts I'm used to seeing them in.

But you'll note that when I interact or encounter strangers, I don't really describe their faces ever, and rarely identify them. And it's because I have trouble with that, even as a dragon.

They couldn't study a dragon before metamorphosis? Cause they were in disguise even for the magic? But they knew and were thinking about it? That's why she was so shocked! But also what is this society. They sound huge.

I think I'm just going to respond to this with a sly smile, because you're picking up on the mysteries perfectly. These questions will be answered in later chapters and books! And I want you to be thinking about them and wondering!

(I'm theorizing because you said these observations helped and cause it's fun, but tell me if I should start cutting down again please.)

As an author, I love it, and you never, ever need to feel self conscious about doing it!

Yeah. Again the. She doesn't have proper masking instincts just like. Enough neuron / synapse overlaps to make it work?

Chapman thinks it's because their spell isn't complete. I think it's also because of my dysphoria and dissociation. I won't let myself remember how to use a larynx, because it feels bad.

Similarly, I've forgotten how to move like a human. My head movements are still very much like I do when I'm a full dragon.

But, and I should probably explain this more clearly in the book, Chapman says that the reason I can walk is because sie included feminine walking reflexes in the spell. It wasn't designed specifically for dragons.

That's clarified a little more in a later chapter, but not explicitly. I should fix that.

Eeeeee interview is exciting. So like a text to speech? If she's got a keyboard now. Or still like picture aac?

So, I should probably clarify this in the story, too.

My tablet's AAC app has both picture guided communication and text to speech, and can switch between the two fluidly. And I've been using it's text fuctions, including predictive text, more and more heavily, because I don't really need the pictures. It's faster for me to go right to the words.

The laptop, using a different OS, is set up with a different program that's only text to speech. And I have to type out the words completely, but it's easier for me to do that with the keyboard and human sized fingers. But I've lost my touch typing ability because I'm dissociating from my human skills, or something like that.

What's a touch typist?

A touch typist is someone with the skill to put their fingers on the home row of the keyboard and then to type using all of their fingers without looking at the keyboard.

I now do "hunt and peck" instead, where I look at the keyboard and only use my index fingers, with all my other fingers curled up. It's still reasonably fast for me, though.

That… I. What. Ok I guess authorities being against unionizing kinda makes sense. But. Do they want complete chaos among their dragons? What are they thinking?

The exact reasoning and scheming is going to be revealed in the sequels. But, the authorities are not unified on this. The City Council is divided, and the police are acting of their own accord, cooperating with someone else who has some kind of agenda. So there's already chaos.

Aw that soul being free again sounds so so nice. You are good at describing like dysphoria and stuff in not just what it's like but in images and how everything feels with that.

Thank you!

Brain is confused trying to imagine all the anatomy words for how she looks but it's probably very helpful usually.

So, the rest of my system, the Inmara, are really good at using Blender, and we're talking about creating a 3D model of me and setting up a series of boudoir shots. Maybe make it kind of like a silly pinup calendar. That will do a pretty good job of showing people what I look like.

This photo here is my headmate Goreth, who stars in the End of the Tunnel, which you are also reading. I'm not all that different looking than them, but I'm smaller and my proportions are not quite the same:

I have much larger hind legs and feet, and much shorter and daintier forelegs. And I'm blue instead of green. And my tail barb is different in a way that's hard to explain. Also, my horns are straighter. And my skull shape is a little different, with my eyes more on the sides of my head, and more teeth showing.

But the arrangement of wings to legs is correct, and length of neck and tail is pretty close too.

(ugh, that rendering has some garbage going on)

Actually can she still do dragon sounds? If she's still talking (or not) like dragon? That might be interesting to have a human doing morning calls and them not finding who did it. Very risky tho.

Unfortunately, I'd need my syrinx to do that, and I don't have it while in human form. The disguise is a full physical transformation, so it alters my internal anatomy.

A syrinx is the same thing birds use to talk, and it's located right between their lungs. So it's a completely different mechanism for making noise than what humans have.

Again, thank you so much for your thorough feedback and questions. I do really appreciate it so much!

Love,

Meg

Chapter 16: Finding my voice

The clothes are obviously Chapman’s, and I’m made to fit them.

The central piece of the ensemble is a TARDIS dress. Probably because it’s blue.

There’s also a pair of sunset orange ballet flats with orange supportive insoles in them. A pair of gloves, a purse, and a pair of sunglasses, all of the same color.

The purse is bigger, and in better shape, and with a longer strap, than the purse I’ve been using. So I happily transfer everything over to that. And that’s really super easy with my new sofa-primate hands.

There’s a simple makeup kit in the purse, including a mirror, that I’m entirely too afraid to use.

I’ll catch a glimpse of myself in a window or a bathroom mirror eventually, but I don’t need that now, and I don’t know a thing about makeup. A lot of women locally don’t wear much of it, if any at all, anyway. I’ll blend in just fine without it.

Except that I’m wearing these clothes, and they are telegraphing who I am to anybody who might suspect I’m wearing a pendant that can do this in the first place.

There are panties that are the same blue as the dress.

No bra. The dress has a shelf bra, and what I’ve got on my chest probably doesn’t even need that. I’ve still got them, though. Definitely bigger than I’ve ever had before.

A lot of women around here don’t wear bras either. So, again, not a huge deal. And one less thing to delay my exit from the parking garage.

When I’m all dressed, the pendant hangs all the way down to the bottom of my sternum, under my dress, completely hidden by it and its high neckline.

In a pinch, though, I can still grab it with both hands and haul it right over my head and out of my dress. But if I do that, the dress won’t survive. Nor will the shoes or gloves. Or panties.

There are a lot of reasons I don’t like this, now that I’m doing it, and I want to take the pendant off now. However, that would shunt me over to escape plan B, and that might result in more of last night’s kind of bologna, actually.

But I look like I’m going to a science fiction convention.

—

As I stick my nose out through the crack in the door of the stairwell, I smell, hear, and see a police car roll by and head for the ramp up. They obviously didn’t see me even crack the door, but I let myself be convinced that my disguise is already working, and lick my lips before opening the door more fully.

Another police car swerves and pulls to a halt in front of me as I step out of the door, and I make startled eye contact with the driver.

He pulls his microphone from his dash and puts it to his mouth, to say, amplified and way too loud, echoing throughout the complex, “Ma’am. Please vacate the premises immediately for your safety. There is a dangerous reptile wandering the parking garage.

I still don’t see animal control anywhere.

I nod, and wave, and stumble out, around and past the car to the sidewalk.

I hope they don’t hurt that poor lizard.

Fortunately, I happen to know that she’s making a cunning getaway. But, they might yet track her down, I suppose.

What if they have a wizard on their staff?

—

The door of the coffee shop opens, setting off the chime to let everyone know that the first customer of the day has entered.

Well, no. Chapman and Rhoda are already there, in the back of the main room, waiting for me.

Jill and Cerce, who open on Saturdays, have been told what to expect, but Cerce gawks from behind the counter as Jill steps out to get a good look at me and then at Chapman and back again.

I understand we don’t look exactly alike, though I couldn’t tell from memory when I had taken a peek at myself in a shop window. But, it does look like our bodies were stamped out of the same base mold.

There are some differences.

My boobs are bigger.

My hair is dark brown and not cut in a side shave, and it falls to my shoulders. It has a slight wave to it.

Chapman had said sie had based my facial features on hir favorite autistic comedian from Australia, mixing them with hir own. And the result is that we could be siblings, cousins, or painfully gay partners, depending on if the beholder has prosopagnosia like me or not. And I’m honestly fine with any of those assumptions. I feel like I’d have fun playing each of them up. If I could focus on socializing as if I’m human.

Jill stops in front of me and asks, “Meghan. You look stunning. And stunned. Are you all right?”

I open my mouth and I squeak.

Jill blinks.

See, there’s a bit of a problem.

I hold up a finger. Straight up. It surprises me and I look at it in wonder for a second, then I glance at Jill, and then Cerce. And then I reach into my new purse with both hands and pull out my enchanted tablet.

I almost go to put it on the ground in front of me, but stop myself from bending over more than a couple degrees and make a coughing noise. Then I rub my nose and straighten up and deliberately hold the tablet in front of me.

At which point I reach with one of my hands and turn it on.

Holding it with one hand directly in front of my face at half an arm’s length out, I press on the screen with the knuckle of my other hand.

This feels so freaking awkward and weird.

But soon the AAC app is open and I can talk again. So I say, in my own now familiar voice, that of the tablet, “Can’t talk.”

“What? I don’t understand!” Jill exclaims. Then looks questioningly at Chapman.

Cerce utters, “Oh.”

And Chapman nods at her and then says, “She has a larynx now, Jill. Not only does she not know how to use it, but I imagine it feels really weird when she tries.”

I nod vigorously.

“But didn’t she have one before?” Jill asks.

“I don’t know,” Chapman says. “I never got to study a dragon before the metamorphosis. No one did. We didn’t know who they were. But if I had a guess, I’d say she did, but she lost all memory of how to use it when that old disguise was discarded.”

Jill half points at me and asks, “And how did you say she got this way again?”

“I very pointedly didn’t,” Chapman replies. “And I won’t.”

Jill squints at me and examines me further and says, “I do feel like I recognize her, even though she’s never looked like this. Just like the first time she changed. Will all the other dragons be able to do this?”

“Probably not. Or, if so, one at a time.”

“So weird. And so cool, and,” she looks at me in the face. “Are you really OK with this?”

I shake my head, making sure that she and Cerce and Rhoda and Chapman see me do so. Then I use my tablet to say, “Have to.”

“OK. OK.” She nervously smiles at Chapman, then back at me. “Well, you look good.”

—

There’s a full length mirror in the back room, where they’re going to eventually set up my computer, and I’m really annoyed that I’m using it to look at this body and not my own.

I could take off all my clothes again and then the pendant, and get to see, but that would be a lot of trouble. I’ll get to see eventually.

And, even though it’s a full length mirror, it’s not really wide enough to give me a full third person view of my wingspan. When I have one.

It’s just fine for a human, of course.

I’m.

I’m a woman.

Only I’m not.

This is how I know that I’m not.

Oh, I am definitely female. I am so supposed to be female. I am almost laser focused now on the idea of laying eggs in the spring.

I might be in the need to look for a suitable egg laying lair, actually. It’s a whole half a year away, but now I’m thinking of that pretty solidly.

But anyway, female dragons are not typically women, and this is definitely not me.

Kind of like before my first metamorphosis, I feel like I’m seeing a completely different person in the mirror. Like, as if it’s literally not a mirror but a window, with another person on the other side. My brain will absolutely not let me see it as a mirror. Even as that person mimics my movements and expressions.

But the person I see is cute!

And unlike before, she looks like someone I’d like to at least be very good friends with.

I sure wouldn’t mind looking like her if I absolutely had to. At least humans would treat me almost right if they saw her when looking at me.

Which, for the time being, they will. Which is a startling revelation to keep having. It never stops being jarring.

I do find it a little weird that I can walk just fine, but I can’t talk. It feels like a continuity oversight in a science fiction show. Or a plot hole. But I speculate it might have something to do with dissociation, and what specifically triggers my dysphoria and what doesn’t. Maybe.

It is magic. And very particular, literal magic at that, from Chapman’s explanation. Like programming the universe itself. So, it might just be that I’m missing the code for speech but not for walking. Though, why that would be the case, I’m just not sure. It makes less sense to me than my dissociation explanation.

I tilt my head to the side and watch as the other person does it too. They do remind me a lot of Chapman when sie isn’t around.

I again ask myself this question, because the topic just happens to be on my brain regarding eggs and just how human I might be at the moment. Would I have sex with this person if I could?

Maybe?

If I appear to be human, and she is human, maybe I could. Socially. Accept that.

Physically? Can I imagine enjoying the physical sensation of that?

Honestly, I just can’t even bring to mind memories of physical human contact, let alone daydreams of it.

Why do I ask myself this?

Because humans are constantly talking about it. Or, a lot of them are. Every relationship in every story seems to center around eventually having sex. And it’s the one way they ask whether they’re compatible with each other. And I guess it’s one of those habits I’ve learned from them.

Again, I don’t know what happens in the spring, which I’m guessing is mating season, based on thoughts I keep having.

I turn my head away from the mirror.

I’m supposed to be using this thing to practice acting and moving like a human woman. And I’m failing even at moving like a human, actually. I can tell that much.

I awkwardly move to open the door and walk through the short dark hallway out into the cafe. There are some other customers there now, and Chapman comes to me and indicates we should head back into the back room again.

I was going to ask hir to help me, but apparently I don’t have to.

Rhoda moves to come back, too, but Chapman stops here and says, “Just a moment, OK?”

And then, once we’re back there, Chapman closes the door and stands in front of it.

“Maybe we don’t need you to practice being human today. Just keep the disguise on until we’re done,” sie says. “It’ll be more convincing if you’re draconically weird for the interview. Blending in with people will be needed later, maybe, when you want to use it.”

Then we talk about a few other things before inviting Rhoda in to plan the next phase.

—

It’s the end of the summer and this weird man is wearing black jeans and a black leather biker’s jacket. His black hair is the kind of mess they strove for in old photos of geniuses, but his mutton chops belong at the Subdued Stringband Jamboree. He’s wearing cowboy boots and holding a small notepad and a pen, his right leg propped up on his left as he sits and listens to me explain things using his laptop with the AAC program installed on it.

I find the keyboard is reasonably easy to use, once I get used to using my fingertips to hunt and peck.

I used to be a touch typist, but I think this way now for some reason. But I’m still getting full sentences out in reasonable time.

He’s nodding as I talk.

Occasionally, he asks a question.

What I find absolutely hilarious is that his name, his literal given name, is Seagull. Seagull Phil. It sounds like a nickname, but it isn’t.

The coincidence of that made my stomach growl at the weirdest moment in our introductions.

He works for the weekly paper, and we’re having this interview in the back room of the shop.

He has a voice like a 1930s transatlantic radio announcer. Soft, gentle, and extremely articulate. It does not fit his physical image in the slightest. He’s six foot three, too.

The whole affect is disarming and makes me feel at ease despite my mounting and raging dysphoria. I almost forget that I don’t look like myself.

Rhoda met him at the Council meeting, and befriended him when it was adjourned abruptly to his great dismay. She’d told him that he could interview a dragon.

I’m keeping my human disguise for this so that I can type easier, really.

When we’re done, I’ve promised to shed it so that he can verify that I’m the Meg that everyone is talking about.

What I’ve learned is that apparently I’ve been targeted by the authorities because I’ve been leading the morning roll calls, and someone thinks that that will break up the grip the rest of the dragons have on the city. But also, the property management of my building had called the police for my forceful eviction from the premises (which they had momentarily achieved). They have no idea I’m trespassing.

I’m telling Seagull as much of my story as I can manage in the time we have.

Between this interview and the letters that Astraia and I sent to City and County Councils, there may be some hope for a better resolution, Seagull says.

I want to believe him.

—

Now I see myself in that full length mirror.

I still wish it was a mirror in a dance hall, or something like that. But between it and my ability to twist and crane my neck to look at my back and belly, or to look at the mirror from any angle, I get a really good look at myself.

I’m alone again in the back room to do this.

And I’m relaxed in ways that I didn’t think even mattered.

It’s like my very cells have unclenched.

It’s that energized looseness and lethargy you might feel after the best massage, if your soul had been massaged.

So, when I described my torso and limbs as being similar in scale to a human’s, that didn’t really do any justice to their form or function, or actual shape. Just a vague sense of scale that explains why and how I can enter buildings with little trouble.

I’ve only seen morphology like this in recent speculative illustrations of dinosaurs, with the major addition of a third set of limbs. My wings.

Unlike how dinosaurs are thought to have been, based on their skeletal structures, I believe I am about as flexible as a monitor lizard.

But my back is high and arched, and my chest does have a keel like a bird’s, because wing muscles demand that. This makes my torso tall, like a dogs, and gives me a barrel chest like a swan’s. Also, my neck starts at the base by going up and curving gracefully to my head, which can be described as before. But now I’m thinking of it as kind of a cross between a goat and caiman in shape, nearly straight horns swept back. And my tail tends to be held upright and straight out for balance. I can’t curl it terribly tightly with muscles alone, but it’s more flexible than it looks when I move.

My wings are more forward than my forelimbs. Which actually makes my wings my forelimbs. My arms, I guess, are set further back out of the way of my flight muscles. But they’re still partially linked, and I do flex them a little in sync with my wings when I’m flapping hard.

If I stretch out, from tip of nose to tip of tail, I might be ten or eleven feet long.

I know I don’t weigh nearly as much as I did when I presented as a 5’10” human man that was 280 lbs.

On the other hand, I think I may have notably grown in length and girth in the last week. I have no measurements to confirm it, but I just feel like it has happened.

My left shoulder still has that nasty gash in it, which isn’t there when I’m in human disguise.

But even with that gash, every inch of this body, as I look at it, every scale, every tiny curve, every bump and nobble, every movement of it, everything is mine. Mine in the same way that this building is mine, and this coffee shop. The way that my friends are mine. And the city itself. The way that my soul is mine.

Not the mine of ownership or domain. The mine of association and identity.

The mine by which I derive my sense of being and purpose and place. Contentment. Joy. Pride.

It can be injured and made weaker, but even then that’s mine, too.

It’s the kind of mine I can mine for strength.

Inspired by this feeling, I spend a little time learning a few more simple, one syllable words, so I can say them faster when I need to.

[dreamifics]

Favorite Crime

James Potter x Reader

Summary: Y/N L/N and James Potter were in a relationship together, Y/N was too blind to see James Potter's intentions. Just pure angst.

Know that I loved you so bad

I let you treat me like that

I was your willing accomplice, honey

James Potter..

How would I describe him? Charming, Endearing or just a prick? He was everything I wanted, I loved him. I didn't see it back then.. How his eyes would fall on her, how he did anything just to make her smile. I never gave it much thought, I was too busy giving him heart shaped looks to notice that I was really not the one he loves but he was all I loved.

"Y/N, would you mind if we skip our date today?Lily needs some help with a few things." He asked..

"We haven't hang out with each other for weeks now.." I hinted.

"I'm sorry, but Lily needs my help."

"It's your choice, I don't own you." I answered with a frown..

"Alright, I'll see you tommorow." He still chose Lily, but I still didn't give that much a thought.

It's been weeks since me and James last hang out, just us. Today he told me he was studying in the library, but he wasn't there.. Where was he? I spotted Remus not far from me, I walked up to him.

"Hey, Remus!Did you see James anywhere?He told me he was studying in the library but he's not there.." I questioned one of his friends.

"Ohh..He didn't tell you?"

"What?" I nervously asked.

"He went to Hogsmeade with Lily.."

"Oh."

"Yeah, he didn't tell you that?" He asked..

"No!No!I think he did, I must've forgot." Maybe, I just forgotten about it..

Even though I saw the signs, I ignored it. I was innocent and inlove, every red flags I saw went down the drain. Just because I love, I let him fool me like that.

And I watched as you fled the scene

Doe-eyed as you buried me

One heart broke, four hands bloody

Quidditch practice has just ended, sweat and muscle aches was all I could feel. I'm walking back inside when I saw James waiting for me. I was delighted to see him, I felt my heart raced as our eyes meet.

"Y/N, can we talk?" My smile dropped when I sensed that this was about something serious.

"Of course!" I gave him a timid smile.

"I--Uhh, I don't know how to say this but.." He walks up to me, his eyes blank. This was not the James I knew..

"What?" I questioned unsure of how I should react.

"I'm breaking up with you.."

And just like that, I died..

"W-What?" The information refused to sinked in, my lungs suddenly collapsed as tears fell in my eyes.

"I'm sorry. " I looked him in the eyes, there were no guilt or remorse. It's like he already moved on.

"Sorry?That's all you could say?" I laugh bitterly and dry, he just moved his eyes away from me.

"I don't know what--"

"I mean, why?Is it because I'm not pretty enough?Or is it--"

"Prongs!Professor McGonagall's asking for you!" Sirius shouts from a far.

"I'm sorry Y/N, I have to go." The tears flooded down my cheeks as my heart broke to thousand of pieces. Why did he do that to me? After that day, insecurity and anxiety became my new companion.

It didn't take long for James to move on because the next week, the news of Lily and James relationship spread Hogwarts like a wild fire.

"I saw the two of them kissing when James was still with Y/N." I heard from a student, so that's the reason. He cheated, he didn't love me, he wanted Lily not me.

"I heard from Sirius that James just used Y/N to make Lily jealous." And that caught my attention, I saw my friends give me a concern look.

"Let's just go, Y/N..Don't mind them."

They pulled me away from the crowded halls and into our house common room. Did he really just use me? I felt the tears appearing on my warm eyes. It suddenly made sense, the time James and Lily went to Hogsmeade, that's when he totally changed for the worst.

"Y/N, don't you dare cry!" My friend warned me, but it was too late. The tears involuntary fell from my eyes, they couldn't help but feel pity for me. A silent sob escapes my lips, I felt my heart getting worse when I try to breathe. Insecurities seems to find it's way to my brain as my thoughts started to compare Lily to me.

James Potter killed me, not with the killing curse but with a much worser curse ever to exist..

Love..

Those things I did

Just so I could call you mine

The things you did

Well, I hope I was your favorite crime

In our relationship, I tried everything to make him stay. To refrain him from finding another. I did anything he enjoyed doing, to pulling pranks on Slytherin to skipping class to sneak out of Hogwarts. I did everything he wanted,  just so I could call him mine..

"Oh my god!Malfoy's gonna lose his sanity when he finds out that we put a charmed pink hair dye in his shampoo!" I giggled as we walk away from the Slytherin tower.

"I know!And I couldn't have done it without you, love.." James smiled cheekily at me.

And all James did was call me his but leaves once Lily showed up. He killed me, James Fleamont Potter killed me, he committed a crime, a treason. He betrayed me, he used me.. He's a criminal and I hope to Godric that I'm his favorite crime..

You used me as an alibi

I crossed my heart as you crossed the line

And I defended you to all my friends

I should've trusted my instincts, I didn't listen to my guts when it screamed inside me to not fall for James. And it turns out that it was right, James only used me as an excuse to make Lily Evans jealous.

"And if I put this king here, I would---mmm" James cut me off with a heart shaking kiss, we were in the great hall playing chess when he suddenly kissed me.

Back then I thought that it was sweet but reminiscing now, he only did that when Lily walked in. I was too busy melting in his kiss to notice it, ignorance is really a bliss.

Stupidity really runs in the course of my veins, I should've listen to my friends when they said that there was something odd with James.

"I'm telling you, Y/N..He's just using you as a distraction from his feelings to Lily!" A dear friend of mine pointed out to me.

"James is not like that, I've know him since we were little.."

"Since you know him so well, you also know his weirdly obsession with Evans!" Another dear friend of mine points out.

"Stop being like this guys, he's not like that.." I protested.

Oh, how wrong was I? James was everything they said he was, I was naive enough to defend him. See, how much I loved him.. Love is really something..

And now, every time a siren sounds

I wonder if you're around

'Cause you know that I'd do it all again

Now, it's hard to trust anyone who crosses my path. When they tell a word James once spoke, this siren suddenly blast in my mind and memories of us immediately flashes in my head.

"I like you, Y/N.." A Hufflepuff student confessed to me, I couldn't help but remember James..

"I like you, Y/N..More than I should like a friend.." James was a great pretender.

Now, trusting for me is much harder than killing. I'm afraid, because I know that it will happen again. I'm scared, because I'd do it all again. I will feel the same pain I felt when I was with him.

James Potter killed everything in me..

It's bittersweet to think about the damage that we do

'Cause I was going down, but I was doing it with you

Yeah, everything we broke, and all the trouble that we made

But I say that I hate you with a smile on my face

Oh, look what we became

The damage he did is still present to this day, because it's still embedded in the walls of mind, it still lingered in my heart. I was never happy with him, but it's nice to know that he wasn't happy with me either, we were miserable with each other, I was going down with him.

I guess, I'm also in the blame, we both committed crimes but not the same crime. We both caused damage, it's sad to think that after all the troubles we did, I don't regret anything. I hate you, but I keep saying that with a smile in my face.

Why? Because in the end, we were both in the wrong. James used me, betrayed me but I let him do it to me.. Ignored the red flags and warnings, turned a blind eye because I loved him. We both commit crimes that we both knowingly committed.

Well, I hope I was your favorite crime

Your favorite crime

Your favorite crime

'Cause baby, you were mine

James Potter was my favorite crime..

I just wrote this because I can't get this song off my head, I didn't re-read this, they might be typos or mistakes. If you guys have any request for imagines about ( marvel characters, DC characters, stranger things, game of thrones, brooklyn 99, friends, basically anything! I accept everything!)

[traincat]

I feel like I've read a ton, but I'm honestly still pretty new to comics rn. That being said... What is one more day? Ik we don't like it and it happened a while ago, but that's about it [,=

Time for Spider-Man History With Traincat: Highly Controversial Storylines! And that feeling is totally normal with comics with huge canons -- you can read a ton and still have some fairly big blindspots in your understanding of the total picture. That being said, this is kind of a big one, both in terms of Spider-Man history/canon and in terms of how Spider-Man fandom functions. I would say probably no other storyline has had quite as much impact on how the fandom views and interacts with the source material as One More Day/Brand New Day. It's been the Wild West out here ever since it happened. (Which was in 2007, so like, yes, fairly long ago, especially when you look at how Spider-Man canon has evolved since, but in the grand scheme of things, also kind of recent. One More Day is not old enough to rent a car.)

So when people talk about Spider-Man's One More Day, they're usually actually talking about two related arcs: One More Day and Brand New Day. For the sake of simplicity, I'm going to be covering both. For the sake of transparency, I am going to admit that I think One More Day, as a self-contained story, is good, actually. This is controversial! I admit that! But I stand by my stupid opinions on this blog, for some reason. I think One More Day when you examine it on its own, by which I mean you ignore the decade and a half worth of canon that came after it, as a Spider-Man story and as a PeterMJ-centric story holds up under scrutiny and that people who don't like it don't like complicated love stories and might actually throw their own mothers under buses. No offense to the OMD haters. Little bit of offense to the OMD haters. Brand New Day, which is the continuation of One More Day, on the other hand -- largely bad. Very largely bad.

But let's backtrack. One More Day is a four issue crossover storyline that takes place directly after Civil War, during which Iron Man and Captain America got divorced and divvied up the superhero community and Spider-Man made some startlingly bad decisions and made a fugitive out of himself and his family in a manner that got Aunt May shot, and Spider-Man: Back in Black (Amazing Spider-Man #539–543) which examines Peter's actions immediately after Aunt May is shot and ends with him humiliating the Kingpin in front of an entire prison. One More Day consists of Amazing Spider-Man #544 -> Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #24 -> Sensational Spider-Man v2 #41 -> Amazing Spider-Man #545. In One More Day, Aunt May is dying, all of Peter's efforts to save her have thus far failed, and, consumed by guilt, he is rapidly running out of time. Approached by Mephisto, a literal demon from hell, Peter is offered a deal: Aunt May will live -- and Peter's identity, which was previously revealed to the world at large during Civil War, will once again be hidden from the memories of all but a select few -- if Peter trades him his marriage to Mary Jane. Peter and Mary Jane struggle with this, but eventually both agree to the deal. The clock strikes twelve, the deal is done, and Peter and Mary Jane's marriage fades into history.

(ASM #545) A reasonably simple premise for a story that caused so many problems -- most, I would argue, not actually the original story's fault. So obviously, this was an unpopular move -- Peter and Mary Jane had for a long time been a fan favorite Marvel couple, and in a fictional universe where most relationships are doomed as soon as they begin, the enduring Spider-Marriage was sacred ground. And then, with a snap of its fingers, it was gone: Peter wakes up in Aunt May's house, no longer married, with Mary Jane out of the picture. (She would not return to the book on any sort of consistent basis for over 50 issues.) In the wake of One More Day began Brand New Day, which is basically what it sounds like: a promised "brand new day" of "exciting" Spider-Man content and a publishing schedule where Amazing Spider-Man came out three times a month. (Which sounds good on paper but I think in practice caused more problems than it created good storylines.) Peter, newly single again, had new love interests! And also Harry Osborn was alive again for some reason! I generally like Harry's post-BND stories so that part's fine with me.

But overall? Brand New Day is a mess. It knows it wants to tread new and exciting ground with Peter -- tell new stories! ensnare new readers! make them fork out for a book three times a month. -- but it doesn't know what those stories should be. Readers who were invested in Peter and Mary Jane's relationship -- a major facet of Spider-Man comics for decades at that point -- felt rightfully betrayed that the marriage could be so easily traded in and that Mary Jane herself, perhaps the second most important figure in Spider-Man comics after Peter, could be tossed aside. From a personal point of view, I think Brand New Day fails in large part because it abandons what has always made Spider-Man such a compelling series, and that's the mix of Peter's personal life with his vigilante life. BND sees Peter with new friends, new jobs, new love interests, etc -- it is very much a brand new day! But it isn't a better day compared to the stories that came before it. I do like some post-BND stories, especially American Son (ASM #595-599) and Grim Hunt (ASM #634-637), but compared to pre-BND where I think the majority of canon is good, it's a very lacking body of work that is hurt by the way it divorced itself from the PeterMJ marriage as Spider-Man's central relationship.

"But Traincat, I thought you said you liked One More Day?" Yeaaaaah. I do. This is why I keep saying I like One More Day on its own merits, and not on the merits of the stories it opened the doors for. I like a good romantic tragedy in fiction, and the way Peter and Mary Jane's final scene in One More Day plays out is beautiful. I like the idea of Peter caught in this impossible situation, being asked to choose between two women he loves more than his own life. A really common criticism I see leveled against One More Day is that Peter should have chosen his relationship with Mary Jane over May's life, which is -- okay, I think it's weird that people keep insisting on this, not in the least because by asking Peter to sacrifice his aunt's life they're essentially demanding he commit a callous, out of character act in order to further his own interests. It's also weird because the thing is, Peter already chose Mary Jane over May -- that's what gets them into this situation. It's literally in the scene where May is shot:

(ASM #538) When the gun goes off, Peter's spider-sense kicks in, and he covers Mary Jane, leaving May in the path of the bullet. He does choose Mary Jane over May, regardless of whether he realized what he was doing. And that's why he can't make that choice a second time. His actions in One More Day do make sense for him as a character, whether or not any individual reader likes them, and Mary Jane's actions make sense, too -- after all, she's the one who ultimately tells Mephisto that they agree to the deal when Peter can't bring himself to voice it.

A lot of people also like to nitpick One More Day by going, well, why could (x) or (y) with life saving powers save Aunt May which is like -- yeah, I guess, but if we're going to ask that about this specific comic book near death setup, you kind of have to do it with every single one, and I'm not going to stake every single moment of comic book drama on whether or not that gold kid from the X-Men was busy at the time. Comics are soap operas in flimsy paper form: serialized longform storytelling that relies heavily on melodrama. Sometimes you have to go with things. Sometimes you sell your marriage to the devil. Stuff happens. That in and of itself doesn't make One More Day a bad story -- and while some people blame the Spider-Marriage's dissolution entirely on One More Day, I think that's a little shortsighted when you look at the history of Spider-Man since the turn of the century. It's clear -- and Marvel themselves have been perhaps a little too open about this -- that Marvel in the past few decades has had trouble with the direction they want to take Spider-Man. They WANTED Spider-Man to appeal to a distinctly youthful audience that they didn't think they were actually reaching -- understandable, considering that Marvel nearly went bankrupt around 2000 and was saved by Ultimate Spider-Man, an out of main continuity series which retold Spider-Man from the beginning and focused heavily on Peter as a teen -- but the problem was Spider-Man in the main continuity was at that point in canon a happily married man who was pushing the dreaded 30 whether or not they wanted to admit that. This is also why Marvel has continually pivoted away from Spider-Man having kids, because they feared that making him a dad would age him too much and make him unrelatable to their coveted audience of Teens. (This is also why almost every new Spider-Man property, especially the live action movies, perpetually stick him back into high school, despite that occupying a very small slice of 616 canon.) So around the year 2000, they started trying things in relation to the Spider-Marriage, which was viewed as a major problem -- after all, what's more adult than being married and liking your wife. First, they had Mary Jane presumed dead. Then, they had Mary Jane and Peter separate. Then, when Mary Jane and Peter had only recently gotten back together, One More Day struck. If One More Day specifically hadn't gone the way it had, it's pretty clear that the Spider-Marriage was going to go one way or another -- it's a little bit of a shame it happened when it did, because OMD is the end of J Michael Straczynski's run, and JMS wrote a really beautiful Peter and MJ relationship. But Marvel as a company and especially editor in chief at the time Joe Quesada viewed Peter and Mary Jane's relationship as a major problem in how they wanted to portray Spider-Man and thought that striking the relationship from the books would allow them more freedom in their portrayal of him as younger and more relatable to their Desired Audience of people who I guess really wanted to see Peter sleep with characters who weren't Mary Jane.

(ASM #546. Younger! Fresher! Less attached! Kissing random women in the club!)

The problem with One More Day has always been in the follow through -- from the content of Brand New Day to the pacing of events to the fact that Marvel withheld key information for such a long time that it allowed misinformation to thrive. After all, what does it MEAN to trade Peter and Mary Jane's marriage to the devil? It altered the events of canon in Peter and the majority of other characters' memories so that the marriage didn't exist, but it left people wondering -- did the relationship as they remembered it existed? How much of Spider-Man canon was altered? And the answers didn't come for over 100 issues of Amazing Spider-Man. One Moment In Time or OMIT (Amazing Spider-Man #638-641), which revealed that while Peter and Mary Jane never got married in the altered canon they did continue their long committed relationship up until just after Civil War, was published in 2010, so essentially readers were hung out to dry without answers for three years. That's a long time to string people along, but not as long as it took Marvel to confirm that the popular fan theory that Mary Jane retained her memories of the original timeline as part of her own deal with Mephisto was also true, which happened this year. I would say, at least from my perspective, a lot of the frustration doesn't come from the individual One More Day storyline so much as how Marvel has continually dragged out the aftermath, using the promise of a Spider-Marriage return to keep fans on the hook. Which is why One More Day continually comes up in discussion of current Spider-Man, because Spencer's run has relied very heavily on imagery from that period with a serious question of whether or not there actually was going to be payoff, something which is still up in the air.

This has been Spider-Man History With Traincat, brought to you by anonymice like you.

[fullbushfemme]

Meeting the Mayans

word count: 1,804

summary: You thought you were prepared for anything. Growing up with four brothers, you had been bitten, beaten, thrown out of trees, concussed, stabbed, practically any violent act you could possibly think of, you had endured. For a kindergarten teacher, you were tough. You had the scars to prove it. That was, of course, until the day you met the Mayans.

unnamed mayan x fem!reader

warnings: brief mentions of blood, hostage situation, and a shooting.

author's note: I've had this idea in my head for ages now and I'm tempted to make it a series. The only issue is that I can't decide which Mayan I want to star (since they aren't named in this fic). I'm tempted to use this as a jumping off point for multiple fics, writing different stories from this initial incident involving different Mayans, but I'd love to hear any thoughts y'all might have :)

-I also haven't written anything outside of academic works in years so go easy on me <3

Santo Padre Septembers were always your favorite. It was sticky and hot, enough to make anyone want to jump into a pool fully clothed, but school was back in session, which meant you got to meet a new hoard of bright-eyed, eager five year olds. You had spent the last month preparing your classroom for their arrival. Nine am to one pm every day for four weeks was dedicated to decorating your classroom, making name cards, making sure every student had all the supplies they needed. Inside every desk you placed glue and markers and pencils and workbooks and scissors...everything a little kid would need to express themselves. And all of it out of your own pocket. You took it upon yourself to spoil these kids rotten.

Two weeks into class, you already knew everyone’s names, their favorite color, their pets, and whether or not they were allowed to watch TV after six o’clock. You knew who was friends with who, who couldn’t eat peanut butter, and who was most popular. This year’s class was going to be great, you just knew it.

It was a humid Friday afternoon. The room smelled like Elmer’s glue and pencil shavings, with stray scraps of construction paper strewn about the floor after the kids decided this week’s art project was going to be making dinosaurs out of construction paper and glitter. You were staying after class to clean up and vacuum, and to take the class rabbit home with you since no one had signed up to care for him this week, when you heard a knock at your door.

You looked over to the open door, squinting into the sun, trying to make out who it was. But no one was standing in the doorway. “Forget something?” you called out, thinking that a student must’ve left a lunch box or notebook and was feeling shy.

“Not exactly,” a deep voice responded, sending a twinge of fear through your body. You knew that voice. “I was hoping my baby sister could help me with something.”

A lump had formed in your throat that you tried to swallow, to no avail. “What are you doing here?” you choked out, standing from where you were picking up paper scraps.

“I need you to help me hide. Quickly.” Your older brother stepped into the classroom, gun in hand, pupils wider than you had ever seen them. He must’ve been high, you thought, panicked. What had he gotten into now? All four of your brothers were known to be trouble-makers to varying degrees. A few had been to prison for petty crimes, but the brother that stood before you had gotten wrapped up in drug trafficking years ago. He scared you the most. They had all promised your parents that they would keep their lives separate from yours, that they would never put you in harm's way. But it didn’t last. It felt like every other week you had a bruised or beaten brother on your doorstep, begging for help or a place to stay. And today, it was to ask you to hide them.

Your eyes flitted to the large windows overlooking the grassy courtyard where a few children sat waiting for their parents to pick them up. Hide. Hide from what? Who was coming after him? Would they hurt the kids?

“N-no,” you stammered, taking a step backwards. You couldn’t risk putting any kids still on campus in danger. “You can’t hide here. You have to go. You have to go right now.” You could feel a pit in your stomach begin to form as your brother took slow, long strides toward you.

“No?” he spat, completely dumbfounded by your refusal to help him. You had never turned him down before. He was family. You never said no to family.

You swallowed hard before repeating yourself. “No,” you responded, with more conviction this time, although you knew he could see right through you.

You took another step back, but ran up against your desk. Your phone was in the top drawer. Could you reach it fast enough? If you even could, who would you call? The police? That was a good way to get murdered and leave a teacher-shaped stain on the floor for the kids to come back to on Monday. Gripping the edge of the table so hard your knuckles turned white, your brother broke the ominous silence before you could.

“I’m not asking you again, hun,” he spat, now so close you could smell him.

“I can’t,” you whispered, your eyes welling up. “The kids…”

He furrowed his brow for a moment, shocked at the idea that you could actually turn your own flesh and blood away. You had always helped him, no matter how many times your parents told you not to, no matter how many times your life was put in danger. He couldn’t grasp the idea that you would put your foot down when it came to endangering other people, when it came to endangering your kids.

“They’ll kill you, you know,” he seethed, looking back over his shoulder towards the open door. There was a low rumbling growing louder and louder, but that wasn’t to whom he was referring. He was talking about your other brothers. “I told them I’d go to my baby sister, that she’d help me. She always helps me. Why would she flip on me now? Why wouldn’t she help family?” His grip tightened around his handgun as he leaned in to threaten you. “If anything happens to me, they’ll know to come to you first. They’ll know you couldn’t protect your own family.” His breath was hot against your neck. “Now,” he sighed, “Help me hide. And tell them you haven’t seen me in months.”

“I don’t think that’s such a good idea,” a man shouted from outside, causing your brother to grab hold of your arm. Those tears you had been holding back finally fell down your cheeks as your brother pulled you in front of him, placing you between the stranger and your brother. You could barely make out any details of the man from outside because of the blinding sun, but you could tell he had a gun. And that gun was much bigger than your brother’s. As the man moved into your classroom, at least five more men appeared and followed him in, all with guns pointed at your brother.

At this point, you were frozen. The lives your parents had so desperately tried to keep apart were crashing together, their worst nightmare coming true. The two of you were stuck, with only one way out. And he knew it. He gripped your arm tighter, making sure your body could be used as an effective human shield. The barrel of his gun was shoved into your ribcage, his face buried into the back of your hair.

“See what you’ve done?” he seethed. You looked at all of the men placed around the room. Leather-clad men on top of a backdrop of crudely painted rainbows and dogs. You hadn’t brought these men here. You didn’t anger a group of gun-toting men. And yet somehow, this was your fault.

“We’re only here for you, kid,” a low, rough voice called out, a different one than before.

But he wouldn’t let them take only him. He was bringing you down with him. He was willing to sacrifice his own family to keep from going down alone.

The seconds ticking by felt like hours. Your heart pounded against your ribcage, desperately trying to break free. But you could do nothing besides stand still. All you could do is hope and pray that these men that had followed your brother here had enough decency not to kill a kindergarten teacher caught in the crossfire. But your brother refused to give them that opportunity.

“If I go,” he yelled, raising his gun to your temple, “she goes too.”

These words would haunt your every thought for the rest of your life. But in that moment, all you could think about was the weapon pressed against your skin. Your brother wasn’t just willing to bring you down with him, he was willing to kill you himself. And the thought of it made you sick. It made you want to curl up into a ball and scream on the top of your lungs. You opened your mouth to cry out, but your brother hit you across the head with the butt of his gun before you could.

The men opposing your brother yelled, harsh words were exchanged, but all you could hear was a ringing in your ears. Tensions rose. Guns were raised. Blood dripped down your face and mixed with your tears. Your senses were betraying you, one by one, blending every sensation into one incomprehensible nightmare.

And then, a single gunshot rang out, making you acutely aware of the severity of the situation once more.

A scream escaped your chest as you fell to your knees, free from your brother’s death grip. You brought your hands up to your ears and squeezed your eyes shut, hoping it would all be over.

But it wasn’t over. It wouldn’t end. No matter how hard you prayed, you were still on the floor of your kindergarten classroom. Your brother was still prepared to kill you if he felt threatened. Someone was shot...someone was shot but you couldn’t bear to look. You wanted to look, you had to look, to see if it was your brother that was shot. But before you could muster the courage to open your eyes, two arms wrapped around you and pulled you into an embrace. It couldn’t have been your brother, it was much too gentle. But if it wasn’t him, then who?

It took a moment to open your eyes, but when you did, you looked up to see who was holding you. His face was kind, with dark brown eyes filled with worry as he looked down at you. He opened his mouth to say something to you, and he probably did, but you couldn’t hear him over the pounding in your head. He was a stranger to you, and yet he clung to you to keep you from seeing the mess behind you. Like he truly cared for your wellbeing. He pulled you in closer to him, placing his chin on top of your head the way your father did when you were young. It felt...safe. And all you wanted to do was collapse into him and allow yourself to feel safe. You let your head fall into his chest. You let your head fall into this stranger’s chest. And just as you did, two white patches on his left breast caught your eye. Two patches that read: Mayans, Santo Padre.

[fandomele]

On top of what I've read, which I completely agree with, I want to add an opinion from the point of view of someone who pretty much only cared about characters' relationship and development in any direction, and who only cared about general plots in terms of how characters were affected:

I feel that having this second SHIELD and, most importantly, having it ATTACK the base (after kidnapping Hunter, who had significant moments with nearly all members of the original team excluding Jemma who, to be fair, was excluded from most bonding moments) should have lead to some long-term in-fighting between everyone else vs Bobbi and Mack (or possibly everyone vs Bobbi, Mack, and whoever sympathized with Bobbi and Mack)

and this is considering that Mack was already there at the beginning of s2, while Jemma was gone for around six months (take this with a grain of salt, I can't find any source to back me up right now so I'm going by memory, could have been four months), but didn't know Jemma so he came in after that, and other SHIELD attacked what, a month or two after the beginning of the season? While Bobbi had been there for that month or two? And maybe it's less? So Bobbi in particular didn't exactly have time to become best friends with anyone considering everything else that was happening.

That said, they literally joined to gather intel, make friends (even if we know it was real friendship, the people living in it don't) and then their SHIELD attacked to seize control LESS THAN ONE YEAR since Hydra did that, to a base full of people who are likely traumatized and cannot handle with grace new betrayals and battling old friends in their own base a second time.

Daisy is someone who may not be vindictive but holds you accountable and will snap at you and call you out if you do something like this, and even if she was busy with her own storyline she should have been a lot more aggressive towards Bobbi and Mack, especially since she almost got shot by their people. Instead with the time-jump at the beginning of s3 we find her being literally bffs with both of them. Honestly I think she should have gotten way closer to Hunter and THEN Hunter could have helped her patch things up with Mack first (since he was there months before Bobbi) and THEN gotten closer to Bobbi too. I could also have seen her call out anyone who forgave them too quickly because she's the one who got into a world of unnecessary trouble because of their doing.

Jemma, the most vindictive person on the show (a super interesting trait if you ask me, which disappeared into her 'be a girlfriend' plot) should have been passive-aggressive for at least a year, ESPECIALLY against Mack, the person who basically took Fitz's side without ever speaking to her and confronted her soon after she came back from being undercover in hydra for months, and she should have used the fact that he was potentially using Fitz, was a liar and a traitor, and whatever else was true from her point of view to finally defend herself AND distrust him and Bobbi for a very long time. Tell me you can't imagine Jemma Simmons making little annoying comments about them every time they give her the chance. Maybe THAT could have also led her to defend himself with FItz and finally resolve their fight ONSCREEN, telling him why she left and all that, instead of leaving it unspoken. Season 3 should have had her still completely cold to both of them (also because she spoke to them like... four times, she was completely isolated, barely knew them) and eventually befriend Bobbi a bit more later

unclear if Fitz should have been as bitter, because he was even forgiving and in disbelief when Ward betrayed him and his first instinct seems to want to believe that people have good intentions and Mack and Bobbi are still fighting bad guys, but he IS traumatized by Ward? But also Mack sorta saved him from an explosion? But the explosion was caused by people from Mack's side who could have easily killed him with it without a second thought? Fitz could have become less of a 'I'll immediately be the new best friend of every new character that appears' and more of a 'I am starting to be more distrusting as a general rule' or the opposite 'I am choosing to be trusting but know that it's a choice made after plenty betrayals', and he shouldn't have been as close to either of them in s3. The plot did lead him to be closer to Coulson and Hunter, so I at least appreciate that in terms of relationship-development, and he made up with Jemma because it was important to put everything aside and escape, so that's good too, but in season 6, from their fight, we find out he still doesn't really know why she left, which was terribly important for his character development, so yeah, definitely not good enough.

All three of them and May were put in the position of believing they were attacked by Hydra (remember when she confronted Bobbi about it?) so they should also be pissed about the fact that they were put in the position of killing SHIELD agents they knew and finding out they weren't there with bad intentions only after the fact

How much they didn't have bad intentions is technically up for discussion, because they did break into the base with explosions and gas, so they could take over. More in fighting also from agents who will NOT take orders from the new group should have been there, and not just because loyal to Coulson but because they don't want to just take orders from whoever seizes power, blindly, like in some weird dictatorship

I guess I can see Hunter and Coulson's reaction as acceptable, Hunter and Bobbi's relationship is super messed up and leads him to be the kind of guy who will forgive Mack only to spite her, and then forgive her really quick when she almost dies for him, and Coulson has several side-plans and doesn't need to be too mad at people who weren't in his team to begin with.

But still, it could have opened a lot more plots about who should trust whom, how to re-earn trust when you make such a bad impression, or hell, bitter plots about 'wow these guys literally betrayed us and you forgave them so easily but when *I* do something you don't like I need to beg on my knees?' which is a situation Daisy and Jemma in particular can complain about, and even have one of those situations in which Mack/Bobbi bond for real with one of them while arguing over this and saving each other's lives. Something to make the return of their friendship earned.

note: I really like Bobbi, the severity of the reactions being especially directed at her is simply because she was there for a VERY LITTLE time, and if my two-months coworker who started working when we were super busy and we barely saw each other betrays me she may never be my friend or have to grovel compared to the 6-ish months coworker who shared a lot with me before the busy time.

hey if you're a shield fan and you see this please reblog or comment with your thoughts on the whole SHIELD, the real SHIELD plotline. cause I think it's super interesting but also misses on the execution in places. plus I know it's a topic of contention in the fan base or all least was in the spaces I used to be active in.

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

Hello! Sorry if my English is not as good 😅, but I really love your insightful thoughts about the characters and how you describe Comte 😍. If it's not an annoyance, I wanted to ask something about Charles (I know his route is not out yet and there is not much information about him). I've been seeing in some posts that Vlad did something to him in Dazai's route (i'm not sure what really happened) and i'm really curious about it, because even though it's known that Vlad uses his powers against his people, i can't really picture it due to the way Charles acts towards him with so much affection ?🤔 or admiration... (I guess it's because of his personality or trauma, behavior that it's different from Faust, who acts cautiously with Vlad) So it's something i'm truly curious about. Sorry for bothering you and Thank you!

Welcome welcome! Please don’t worry, I had no trouble at all understanding you, your English is great! ❤️❤️❤️ As for what I know about Charles, my information is limited due to the nature of his content so far--I haven’t seen a ton about him quite yet. But in Dazai’s route we get a glimpse into his situation due to his increased screentime there.  

I’m just going to put a spoilers warning here for Dazai’s JPN rt, since that’s where I’ve learned the most about Charles:

Charles is indeed a very affectionate and generally genki boy as far as interpretations go, but there are heavy implications that Vlad is manipulating him on a profound psychological level. I say this only because there is plenty of evidence that Charles’ behavior isn’t quite his own at points, and because Dazai himself proves it to be true.

One piece of information that is necessary before delving too deep is that Charles finds MC’s handkerchief at one point early on and develops a sudden curiosity/desire to see her. While a person could just assume he was curious, I don’t personally believe that curiosity went without surveillance or intervention--since Vlad was there the whole time.

My best guess is that Vlad wanted to find out more about MC and perhaps use her as bait to manipulate Dazai (or threaten Comte), but Dazai already offered him something interesting in wanting to warp the flow of time--so Charles’ relationship with her was only collateral in the end. While Charles did have some level of sincere feeling for MC, it’s later revealed that it was ostensibly an obsession and did not operate on a normal level of personable feeling.

The way Dazai further proves that Charles’ mind has been manipulated is that, when Dazai begins to suggest that Vlad is essentially a con-man that intends to use Charles for murder no matter the cost to his mental health, Charles reacts with unnatural distress. It’s not the kind of refusal a person would normally have at the suggestion of someone’s betrayal of their loyalty, where they reject it and are uneasy but otherwise aren’t physically controlled by the emotion. Charles seems unable to mentally handle the suggestion that Vlad’s intentions aren’t good at all--that he’s lying--to the point where Charles nearly collapses from the intensity of the dissonance between his own mind and the parts Vlad is forcing into obedience. 

There is also a scene following Charles’ intense mental distress where Vlad essentially interrogates Charles as to his loyalty, and gives the overtone that any kind of disobedience will be swiftly destroyed if he sees it. Faust tries to protect Charles as best he can, but his power is limited compared to Vlad’s.

Furthermore, Vlad is Charles’ sire (aka Charles’ creator as a vampire)--if he can command and manipulate Shakespeare as well as people extraneous to him so easily, I really doubt Charles would be beyond his control. The only reason Faust seems to have more agency and stability is that Faust is highly attached to his own internal emotional compass and what he believes in. (The keyword here is “seems”, if I’m honest I’m not 100% sure if Vlad isn’t still there in his mind, subtly manipulating him to the darker sides of his nature.) Charles, as much as I love him, seems even more susceptible to the emotional/motivational overtones of others around him. I mean Faust even uses a similar tactic to help Charles, in that he slowly walks him through to the solution, and Charles never once questions his judgement or thought process because it feels right to him. If you think about it Shakespeare is much the same way; he’s so obsessed with the creation of his plays and public reception to them that he is easily manipulated because he lacks personal grounding. Vincent, despite his gentle nature, is not half so susceptible to this manipulation because he is immovable at his core. There are moral lengths he will not go to no matter the intentionality, and his inspirations come from deep within. Even Dazai is too mentally strong to be controlled due to his immense love for other people. Vlad also cannot control him because he loves MC so deeply he would never betray that trust, the only single time he betrays it is when he seeks suicide (which is more about fighting his mental illness and self-harm than it is about hurting MC).

If I’m honest, I think Charles may want to believe in the best of Vlad. But I don’t think that necessarily means that Vlad is not manipulating him to his own ends, or that he isn’t causing Charles significant psychological distress/dissonance throughout the game. Charles seems like the type to want to believe in people even if he knows that belief might be misplaced. As for Vlad, I have little to no reason to believe he is not hurting Charles. He does not consider Charles his son in any capacity, and openly treats both Charles and Faust like tools to a greater end. With Vlad, only the results matter--the means are irrelevant.

[jimmygibbsjrrr]

I have a lot of thoughts about the Slaters

namely, I've been wonderin why the Fairfield Survivors got thrown off the boat in Death Toll

in this panel of The Sacrifice comic, Francis confirms the fates of three of the rescue vehicles:

Image ID:

A panel from The Sacrifice: Part 1. Francis is sat in the rescue vehicle from Blood Harvest, speaking to Louis. His dialogue is as follows:

"Louis, I hate to be the one to break this to ya, but we been heading to the safe zone four times now. Helicopter: crashed. Plane: crashed. Boat: kicked us out and left us to die."

/end ID

the chopper from No Mercy was confirmed crashed in Crash Course, and as for the plane from Dead Air, it was pretty easy to guess (and would have been confirmed in the cut campaign Dam It).

but the part about the boat? that's the Slaters' boat from Death Toll. this is the first time we learn this information.

so...why? what happened?

(more under the cut, ended up writing wayyyy more than I expected over these past few days and don't wanna clog people's dashes lol)

so. let's take a quick dive into the last chapter of Death Toll, to see what we can discern about the Slaters from their dialogue.

the rescue vehicle in Death Toll is a civilian boat, Saint Lidia II, owned by John and Amanda Slater, a married couple. Amanda is never heard in-game, but John's reactions to her can be heard over the radio.

the Slaters are explicitly looking for "anyone out there with firearms". John later adds that "once you get on this boat? Your job is keeping our asses alive". it appears that their motivation for saving the Survivors is selfish from the get-go.

this is undoubtedly true in Amanda's case, however, some of John's lines betray a more selfless attitude. he will berate Amanda for not "think[ing] about the little guy". he will ask, "So what, then? We leave 'em to die? I can't do that, Amanda." whilst Amanda is thinking purely of their own survival, John still feels compassionate towards his fellow survivors. despite this, he says that "I don't want our first act of kindness to be our last", acknowledging the conflict between his compassion and his self-preservation.

so. these are the Survivor's saviours in Death Toll. a conflicted married couple looking for bodyguards, offering to take the Survivors upriver to a military safe zone in exchange for protection.

as for why they get thrown off the boat...well, the easiest explanation would be Amanda.

but, stay with me here, because I think it's a little more complicated than that.

this boat? fulla tension. there's the obvious tension between the Slaters, who we've established seem to fight and disagree regularly. then there's the inevitable tension between them and the Survivors. I reckon Louis, with his generally positive and friendly attitude, wouldn't have much of a problem with them, might even attempt some friendly conversation or something. however, he's about the only one.

the comic fully establishes Bill as caring about nobody except the Fairfield Survivors - the most obvious evidence of this being the words he lives and dies by, "we look after our own". he isn't particularly interested in other people, unless they can help the group out. and he'd likely recognise the unstable and conditional nature of their rescue. while I'm sure he'd try and keep the peace, in any reasonable disagreement or fight Bill's likely to take his friends' side, and if anyone's getting thrown off the boat Bill is going with them. this goes for the whole group, to be honest; I don't think they'd want to split up at this point.

Francis hates boats, hates water, and can't swim, so (and I'm getting a little speculate-y here) would probably be in an even sourer mood than usual on the journey. being as abrasive as he is, plus this additional stress, it's fully possible he could piss off the Slaters enough to get himself (or all of them) thrown off the boat.

as for Zoey? well, I don't imagine a married couple who constantly argues is gonna sit well with her, considering her backstory. similarly to Francis, the situation they're in would make her far more stressed, making it more likely for her to lash out.

Amanda didn't want to save the Survivors in the first place, so while I think that John wouldn't throw them off the boat without reason, I reckon she could persuade him to throw them off if they 'caused trouble' - and they would get into an argument with her far easier than they would with John.

in short: yeah, I can see them getting thrown off the boat by the Slaters after some huge fight or disagreement. I think that's a reasonable interpretation of canon, and definitely an interesting concept.

...however, I do wonder if this tension would really be enough to destabilise their mutual need, after everything they went through to come together.

which is why I'm going to bring up The Last Stand!

I gotta quickly address something before this segment: yeah, I'm totally aware this campaign isn't canon. this evidence works with the fact that it exists in an 'alternate timeline'. also, I am missing a few citations for this section - if anyone can provide them I'd really appreciate it, but just a disclaimer that I currently can't prove some of the things the wiki claims members of the Last Stand Community Update Team have said. here and here are the wiki pages where I got this information. in short - the above explanation is simpler and more canon compliant, the conclusion I draw at the end of this post is backed by shakier evidence but I believe is more interesting, and you can make of all that what you will.

allegedly, members of the Last Stand Community Update Team confirmed a strongly-suspected fan theory about The Last Stand: that it branches off from Death Toll in some way, in a non-canon alternative timeline. as well as this, they allegedly confirmed that in this alternative timeline, the Survivors still end up in Newburg for Dead Air. even without the confirmation, this remains a solid fan theory, due to the constant references to Riverside and re-use of many of Death Toll's assets.

who rescues the Survivors in The Last Stand? John Slater. no Amanda - just John. despite her lack of voice actress, if she was still present John would give some indication of this at some point. it can be speculated that whatever happened to her contributed to the lack of rescue at the boathouse that forced the Survivors to take an alternative route. either way, he ends up at the lighthouse when the Survivors call for rescue, alone, and picks them up.

and then later...throws them off the boat. into Newburg.

what reason would John have to do that? without Amanda, surely he wouldn't have that push, as he wanted to rescue the Survivors for multiple reasons in the first place. without his constant arguments with Amanda, Zoey wouldn't be nearly as stressed. and between the three of them I'm sure the other Fairfield Survivors would stop Francis from pissing John off enough to get them thrown off the boat. in short, less Amanda = less tension, and no reason for the Survivors getting chucked off the boat.

...right?

I'd like to remind you that a symptom of the Infection is paranoia.

what if, in both The Last Stand and Death Toll, John and Amanda are infected by the Survivors on the way to the military safe zone? after all, the virus is confirmed to occasionally be airborne, and I doubt two civilians have completely effective, sustained protection against that. likely the only reason they hadn't already been Infected is because they got out on the water early on in the pandemic, and hadn't come into contact with anyone else since. it's unlikely that one of them is immune, and even more unlikely that they're both immune (especially considering those with XX chromosomes may be genetically less likely to be carriers). wouldn't Francis have mentioned it if their rescuers turned or were obviously Infected? yes, but it's possible that the airborne strain works slower as well, meaning that the Survivors are thrown off of the boat after the symptoms kick in but before the Slaters fully turn. even Church Guy had at least an hour from being Infected to turning, and he was bitten. Newburg isn't too far from where the Survivors are rescued in Death Toll anyway (the burning city in the background of the finale is Newburg), so the Survivors clearly didn't last long on the boat anyway. as a result, the Survivors wouldn't realise it was the Infection intensifying the Slaters' paranoia - they'd just think the Slaters were being dicks. Francis also explicitly mentions that they were "left to die", implying negativity or even hostility from the Slaters as the Survivors were being thrown off.

so yeah. that's why I think they got thrown off of the boat in Death Toll - a combination of the intense tension between the two parties, and the Slaters falling victim to Infection-induced paranoia. but an explanation minus the Infection is equally as plausible. it all depends on what you find most interesting, I suppose, and both feel like they fit pretty well into the world.

lord this is a long chunk o text. I know most fandoms prefer art and fanfic over this sorta thing, so please let me know in replies or something if you're interested in more stuff like this. also if any of this makes sense because I like to ramble.

oh and if you'd like to use any of my interpretations in fanworks like art or fic, I'd love to see it :)

[jumukus]

A3! Event: Trump the Phantom Thief Episode 8 Translation

Play time! A heads up on the characters' names:

Muku: King Yuki: Q Kazunari: Ace Juza: Jack Banri: Fox Sakyo: Club

Saionji: Muku-kun, how are you doing? Are you getting seasick?

Muku: I'm doing alright, thank you. Oh, and the room is so beautiful.

Saionji: I am glad it is to your liking. We purposely built the suite rooms in a place where you can't feel the ship's motion.

I am planning to take every possible measure for the theater venue as well, though do not hesitate to let me know if you are unsatisfied with anything.

Muku: I will. Thank you.

Kazunari: Dude, not only the suite rooms are superbs, but to think we also get a whole staff to ourselves…! We can even get the beverages here as many times we like!

Yuki: True. The service is just so good it surprised me.

Sakyo: Don't get too engrossed in these service or you'll be havin' a hard time once we return to Mankai Company.

Izumi: You have a point…

Banri: I don't wanna go back.

Juza: ...I'm thirsty.

Muku: Wanna get some beverages in our rooms?

Juza: No, it's fine. Our rooms are far from here.

Azami: There's a lot of vending machines there. I think they have your favorite strawberry milk.

Juza: I'll go get it.

Muku: …

Izumi: (Today is finally our opening show. I knew it. They all seem pretty nervous because we're going to perform in a different venue.)

Juza: …

Izumi: (Juza-kun looks stiff.)

Kazunari: OK, guys! We've gotta form a circle in times like this!

Banri: Be more specific. What d'you mean by "in times like this"?

Yuki: Bet you already thought of what kind of circle you wanna do.

Kazunari: Righty right! Since our play is about phantom thieves, we all should strike a phantom thief pose!

Sakyo: The heck is that?

Kazunari: No complaining! Just follow me!

Yuki: Fine. Fine.

Juza: ...Muku, do the chant.

Muku: First things first, I'm sorry for causing you guys troubles when I was at a loss of what to do.

I don't want to give up on all the things I want to do. I've decided to do everything I can in all of them.

I'll run through until the end. Follow me, guys!

Juza: Yeah!

Kazunari: Okie!

Banri: Yea.

Q: "It's as musty as always."

Ace: "Clean it up."

Q: "How about you do it?"

Ace: "No way. Geez. This place used to be clean, wonder what happened to it."

Q: "That's because we had a clean-freak before."

Ace: "Okay. Leader, you do the cleaning."

King: "I think it's pretty clean, though."

Q: "Seriously?"

Ace: "Should've known a messy room owner like Leader would say something like that."

Q: "Anyway. Since this is the first time we gathered here after a year, that means you've already set our next target, right? Let's cut to the chase already."

King: "Our next target will be "Mermaid's Tears", a 12-carat diamond."

"It's going to be sold during an auction held at the Royal Star cruise. It's one of the event's highlights and expected to sell for 6 billion."

Ace: "Woo-hoo."

Q: "Heh. Interesting."

King: "Royal Star is currently hiring staff. Q."

Q: "Got it. That means I have to sneak in as one of their staff members, right?"

King: "Ace, get close to the ship's captain and collect information."

Ace: "Roger."

Izumi: (I expect no less from Summer Troupe. They have great teamwork. I can totally feel it.)

(Not to mention Muku-kun's King is able to unite them as a leader.)

Q: "I'm in charge of the rooms in Block A… Laundry and… Ugh. What a hassle."

"This isn't my job in the first place, after all. If that person were here--."

Crew Member: "Are you new here? You seem lost."

Q: "Yes. I don't think I can get out of this place if I lose the map."

Crew Member: "You can ask anyone if there's anything you don't understand."

Q: "Thank you."

"?"

Crew Member: "What's wrong?"

Q: "I think I saw someone over there--."

Crew Member: "But there's only a garbage can over there. Is it a ghost or something?"

Q: "Hey. Stop. I don't like it."

"Hm? A letter?"

"Could this be--I have to report to King."

King: "I'll take the Mermaid's Tears--Jack."

Ace: "Can't believe he's aiming for the same thing."

Q: "Him and King sure are compatible in a strange way."

Ace: "Even though their personalities are the exact opposite of each other."

Q: "What are we going to do now?"

Ace: "Guess we're gonna have a change of pla--."

King: "We'll continue the operation."

Q: "Come again!?"

Ace: "So you mean we're gonna compete with Jack?"

King: "I will not send out this notice. Let's call it a direct confrontation between Trump and Jack."

Q: "Whaaaat!?"

Jack: "Weird. The cops aren't on the move."

"Hm? Where's my noti--."

"It's been a while. How about a reunion? At The Mermaid's Tears' chamber. Trump."

"King, huh… It's just so like him to do something like this. Fine. Let's have a showdown."

Fox: "Here. I got what you wanted, the Royal Star's blueprint."

King: "It is indeed the blueprint."

Fox: "I got you some addition as well. This one is a lil bit pricey."

King: "Figured as much."

Fox: "What are you going to do with this information, though?"

King: "It's prohibited to poke your nose into your client's private life."

Fox: "Oops. My bad. I was curious since you rarely asked for something like this. Oh, yeah. Your master said he wanted to see you."

King: "Club? I wonder why. I'll try contacting him."

Club: "I'm comin' in."

Fox: "Speak of the devil."

King: "Long time no see."

Club: "Perfect timing. Are you free now?"

***

Club: "I'm goin' to retire soon. Take whatever you need."

King: "Retire? Are you serious?"

Club: "My body is startin' to fall apart. It's an age thing. Tell this to Ja--Oh, right. I heard you two broke up."

King: "You made it sound like we're dating. Please don't do that. He just decided to quit my group on his own."

Club: "Y'all never change. Here I thought you'd keep workin' together. That's what you call youth, I guess."

King: "To be honest with you, I'd also never thought he would betray me."

Club: "Looking at that guy, I think he's in his rebellious phase rather than betrayal."

King: "Rebellious phase?"

Club: "He's got some strong sense of rivalry, y'know? Add that with the fact that he's never won against you."

"He must be jealous of you. You're a genius, while he can only do things in a crude way."

King: "Really? I like his way of doing things, though."

Club: "That's exactly why you're hated. Oh, well. You better make up before I die."

King: "Please tell that to him too. You're going to meet him after this anyway, right?"

Club: "You're right. Guess I'm also gonna tell him directly. Both of you are my most excellent apprentices, after all."

King: "Please take this as my present for your retirement. This one is 40 years old."

Club: "You sure are well prepared."

King: "I was actually planning to use it for the celebration party, though."

"--Oh, right. If you're going to retire, please give me that. You know, the 'Venus Ring'."

Club: "I refuse."

***

Fox: "Welcome. Man, I guess we've got a lot of 'speak of the devil' moment today."

Jack: "What are you saying?"

Fox: "Nope. Forget it. Anyway, this is your requested uniform and safe."

Jack: "Thanks."

Fox: "Oh, yea. Your master said he wanted to see you. Why don't you give him a call?"

***

Jack: "Long time no see."

Club: "Hey. Is it just me or did you lose some weight?"

Jack: "What do you want to talk about?"

Club: "I'm gonna retire soon. Take whatever you need."

Jack: "Whatever you need, huh. By the way, the 'Venus Ring'..."

Club: "Y'all really have the same taste. I ain't gonna give it out. I sent it to the right place."

Jack: "By y'all… Do you mean King?"

Club: "You should just go back and regroup with him."

Jack: "I'll never go back until I win against him."

Club: "What a pig-headed kid. So? You see any chance to accomplish that?"

Jack: "I have a feeling we're finally going to settle this soon."

Club: "Heh. You seem confident."

Jack: "Because I've made arrangements ahead of time."

Club: "That's so you. You still look as gloomy as ever, though. Why don't you go soaking up the sun in some warm places in the south once in a while?"

Jack: "No--But you have a point. Maybe I'll do that once this is over."

Club: "Do that. And make up with King."

Jack: "...It depends on him."

Guard A: "Wait there."

Guard B: "This place is restricted to authorized personnel."

***

Q: "'Mermaid's Tears' has been carried away."

King: "Got it. Looks like they put it at the expected place."

Q: "How about the security? Can you unlock it?"

King: "I've already made preparation for that. We just need to see how things will turn out."

Ace: "Hey, wait a sec. Please, King."

King: "Find out the schedule for the guards' lookout."

Q: "Ugh. What a pain. Why do I have to do this…"

***

Q: "The guard will change at 1 P.M. The key will only be handed over when a substitute comes."

King: "So we need that key and the password that the captain has to unlock the door."

Q: "Ace, gain some time for us."

Ace: "Roger. Leave it to me."

Q: "Don't screw up."

***

Ace: "Hey, good work."

Guard A: "You're here sooner than I thought."

Ace: "Boss said my shift would start 30 minutes earlier since I'm always late, you see. Today I got here on time, though."

"Oh. Don't tell me you're gonna get scolded if you end your shift early? Wanna have some chat for thirty minutes then? Man, being a guard sure is easy."

"I actually want to increase my shift more, you know. But I don't reall--."

Guard A: "No, it's fine. I'll end my shift now. Bye."

Ace: "Oh. Okay, then. Bye."

***

Ace: "Mission complete. It's your turn now, King."

King: "Let's see, now. This is unexpectedy such a hassle~."

Ace: "I'm glad you seem to be having fun but please hurry up."

***

Q: "It's almost been thirty minutes."

King: "Just a little bit more…"

Q: "The guard is coming."

King: "I'm counting on you, Ace."

***

Ace: "Hey.."

Guard B: "Hm?"

Ace: "Ouch ouch ouch…"

Guard B: "What's wrong?"

Ace: "Oh, are you the substitute? Thank God. I'm starting to panic since my stomach is killing me. Good bye!"

Guard B: "Hey, wait, the key--."

Ace: "Key? Oh, right. I've gotta hand it ove--ouch ouch ouch."

Guard B: "Hey, you okay?"

Ace: "Wait a minute. Just until I calm down. Ouch ouch ouch…"

Guard B: "F-For now, just go to the toilet first."

Ace: "Don't think that's possible. I feel like it's gonna come out once I move."

Guard B: "Whaaat!?"

Ace: "Do you have some medicine or anything?"

Guard B: "No, sorry…"

Ace: "Can you bring me one from the infirmary? I'm on the edge here."

Guard B: "O-Okay! Wait a little bit!"

Ace: "King, you better open it now."

***

King: "...Weird. We may not make it."

Ace: "Come again!?"

King: "Oh, I got it. This one."

"...Nice. It opens!"

"Q, carry it out. Let's retreat."

Q: "Got it."

***

Guard B: "Hey, I have the medicine!"

Ace: "Very thanks, man. Here, your key! I'll leave the rest to you."

Guard B: "Yeah. Hope you recover soon."

King: "...This is weird. Jack didn't come in the end."

Q: "Maybe he realized it's impossible to go against phantom thieves."

King: "No. That guy…"

Police: "Freeze! We're police!"

King: "--."

Q: "!?"

Ace: "Since when!?"

King: "We're being set up. Q, throw the 'Mermaid's Tears' to the sea."

Q: "Huh!? Do you hear yourself now!?"

King: "Do it now. We'll escape the moment the police look away."

Ace: "You're lying, right!?"

King: "Quick."

Q: "You're the one who told me to do it, alright!"

Police: "H-Hey! The jewel! Pick it up, quick!"

King: "Let's go!"

Police: "Wait!"

Q: "What do we do now!? All of our hardship went to waste!"

Ace: "Our 6 billion…"

King: "That was a fake jewel Jack had prepared."

Q: "What?"

King: "Jack had stolen 'Mermaid's Tears' in advance and replaced it with a fake one."

"He was the one who snitched on us."

***

Narration: "The day before…"

Guard A: "Hey, what's wrong?"

Jack: "No, it's just… the engine…"

Guard A: "Hold on, hold on. If there's any trouble, you better do something about it or else it'll get worse later on. If we're liable for the damages…"

Jack: "There's smoke coming out!"

Guard A: "Say what!?"

Jack: "Stay away from the car!"

Guard B: "Whoa!"

Guard A: "C-Call the fire station! Wait, we gotta get the safe first!"

Guard B: "Hey, is it okay?"

Jack: "Yeah. The smoke disappeared. I found no issues with the machine too."

Guard A: "That means the safe is alright, yeah? God. Give me a break. We almost carry it away ahead of time."

***

Q: "So that's why Jack didn't show up…"

Ace: "He really got us! I already thought it was weird for the police to appear at times like that!"

Q: "Ugh. Even if the police didn't appear, Jack still won since he already got the 'Mermaid's Tears' before us."

King: "I wonder about that."

***

King: "He hasn't made any changes in his base. Well, isn't he a little careless…"

"Even his security system is so weak."

"Hm? A card?"

"'Out of respect of Master's retirement, I will hand over the victory.'"

"Don't be satisfied with second place. You could have taken measures if you know there's a chance it'll get stolen. Oh, well. I'll accept your kind offer…"

***

Jack: "..."

"He really came…"

King: "Hey."

Jack: "--ugh. Why are you still here, King?"

King: "It's been a long time, I want to renew our friendship. I even brought alcohol with me."

Jack: "This is why you're hated."

King: "But you don't hate me, do you?"

Jack: "How did you find out?"

King: "I got some information about you from Fox. It helped me understand your strategy to some extent."

Jack: "In that case, why did you fall into the trap?"

King: "Because, otherwise, you won't move forward as planned. I'll be troubled if you're on your guard."

"I could narrow down your base thanks to the location device I planned on the alcohol I gave to Club. The rest is my intuition."

Jack: "I can never bring myself to like you in the end."

King: "Now, now. Let's have a toast for the 'Mermaid's Tears'. Q and Ace are waiting."

Izumi: (This is the only scene where Jack and King talk face to face. Even so, you can tell how close they are just by watching this scene alone.)

(Maybe because they are cousins, they can create a unique relationship between rivals who understand each other the most.)

***

Muku: Thank you so much!

Juza: Thank you.

Sakyo: Thank you.

Yuki: Thank you.

Kazunari: Thankies thankies~!

Banri: Thank you.

***

Sakyo: The audience's reaction on our first show is great.

Juza: King was so cool.

Muku: Jack was even cooler! The fact that he's active behind the scenes is just so Juchan!

Juza: I can also feel the gap between King, a sharp person with a gentle look, and you, Muku.

Muku: I-Is that so? Ehehe. But your Jack…

Azami: They're going to be like that forever at this rate.

Yuki: When are you going to stop?

Banri: But well, it was good overall. Right?

Kazunari: Totally! Their chemistry was just perfect on the stage, even the audience was pleased!

Izumi: Let's keep this energy until the closing show!

Muku: Yes!

< Episode 7 | Masterlist | Episode 9 >

[casmybelovedass]

The Destiel Folder: Season 7

[Season 4; Season 5; Season 6]

This season is mostly Dean being a depressed bi who can't cope with his crush's death.

This is, in my opinion, the season where Dean actually starts realizing he might for real think of Cas as something more.

Episode 1:

Cas is basically gone, both Bobby and Sam (almost) are ready to compel to whatever he says, but Dean still tries to get him to come back. "You can turn this around. Please!" (3:13) Denial

Dean has no idea how to deal with God!Castiel, but desperate to find him, and getting emotional "I don't even know what book to hit for this." "Then figure it out!" (5:47) Anger

As we have said many times already, angels don't have a sex, Castiel is not a man, and as he states, he is "utterly indifferent to sexual orientation" (8:03), and so is Chuck, God himself, who has admitted having had both girlfriends and boyfriends.

Dean turns off the news the moment he hears a woman describe Cas as "young and sexy", while doing that jaw clentch thing of his (10:14) ... huh... [and this doesn't really matter, but after this we immediately see Dean in a purple flannel. PURPLE! Go Bi!Dean]

"He's not a guy, he's a God [...] Cas is never coming back. He's lied to us, he's used us, he's cracked your gourd like it was nothing. No more talk. We've spent enough on him." (11:09) Dean trying to jump to the 5th stage of grief. Yeah, no baby that's not how it works

Dean tries so hard to convince himself that Cas's gone so he can kill him, but can't really. "Just kill him now!" and struggles hard to hold Castiel's glare. And as soon as Death offers a second option to killing him, Dean takes it. Bargening

"Dean, look, I know you think Cas is gone." "That's because he is." (31:22) Again with trying to jump to acceptance. Not doing great, Dean. In fact, "Yeah, you know how I'm gonna deal? I'm gonna stuff my pie hole, I'm gonna drink, and I'm gonna watch some asian cartoon porn. And act like the world's about to explode, because it is." (32:17) There it is. Depression.

[Remember this: Dean has no shame in watching porn in front of his brother. Wait a few seasons and see]

Just moments earlier, Dean was all "That's not Cas, Cas is dead" and shit, and now he goes "What? You need something else?" worried-husband-mode the moment Cas asks for help (34:50). Also#MARRIED (35:16)

Bobby: "Where's Sam? It's go time." Dean: *looks back at Cas worried* (37:12)

MUST HELP HUSBAND (38:06) look at Dean's eyes!!! They're like 'It's okay, it's okay. You've got this.' "I'm sorry, Dean." Cas chose these words to be his last, thinking he was going to die. LOOK AT DEAN (38:21) ICWAW this would MEAN SOMETHING ELSE

"CAS! [...] Is he breathing? ... Maybe angels don't need to breathe." says the one who was going around saying Cas was gone for good. "He's gone, Dean." "... damn it... *tears up* Cas, you child... Why didn't you listen to me." #MARRIED (39:15) Then he goes "CAS?!" as soon as he starts breathing again. ICWAW, we would SCREAM "LOVE" in this scene

"Imma find some way to redeem myself to you *looks at Dean straight in the eyes*" "*looks at Cas up and down*... Alright, well, one thing at the time, come on. Let's get you out of here." "I mean it, Dean." *eye love-making* "... Okay." (40:30) ICWAW, oooohhh, the meanings this scene would have...

Dean's face when the Leviathans tell him Cas is dead. Again. (41:18)

Episode 2:

Dean looking at the Leviathans occupying Cas' body. The HATE (1:44)

"... okay... so he's gone. *shakes while tearing up* [...] Dumb son of a bitch..." (5:14) Here we go again... I'm fine, shut up

Dean picks up, washes, folds and keeps Cas' coat (5:23) SWEET

"You just lost one of the best friends you've ever had." this hurts me. "... I'm fine, really." (12:11)

"You asked me how I was doing? Well, not good." (38:54)

Episode 5:

Dean progressively drinks more as his nightmares get worse and he misses Cas more and more. 3 times we see him drink, only in the first 12 minutes.

Sam can tell Dean feels like shit, and bet one of those reasons is Cas "Like it or not, the stuff you don't talk about, it doesn't just go away. It builds up." (39:33) Yeah, and not only problems or grief... even love

Episode 7:

Not a destiel moment, but Dean totally got hit on by the waiter. LOL (7:30)

And again. What is it with men in this town and Dean. "We're looking for a necklace." "Romantic. *looks at Dean*" (12:17). Is it an energy reading thing or something? Can they feel the bi energy?

"The Campbell brothers. [...] They weren't actually brothers. That was a cover for their, uhm... alternative life style." (22:40) Huh... I guess calling your lover "brother" runs in the family

"Ever since Cas... I'm having a hard time trusting anybody." (40:44) ouch

Episode 9:

Dean is drunk/high on Leviathan juice, and the first thing he thinks and blabbers about, is Cas (19:48) "I don't even care anymore." Oooohh ICWAW... the possibilities for this scene

Episode 12:

Dean totally checked out that man in uniform. FIGHT ME (16:27)

Episode 13:

"You're head's not in it, man. When Cas died, you were wobbly, but now-" "Now what!!" (39:35) as soon as Sam mentions Cas' death, Dean gets snappy

Episode 17:

Dean keeps getting snappy whenever Sam mentions Cas

"OH my God the love of my life is alive!" (13:02-13:06)

Dean's face when Daphne touches Cas (13:25), and when he calls her his wife (13:41)

AND HIS FUCKING FACE TRYING NOT TO TEAR UP BECAUSE CAS DOESN'T REMEMBER ANYTHING ABOUT HIM (14:16)

You mean to tell me that ICWAW this wouldn't be seen as a mini desperation moment from a man seeing his lover in this situation? Yeah, I don't think so

"What if you were some sort of... I don't know, bad guy." "I... I don't feel like a bad person." Dean's face is like "Damn right you aren't" (16:50)

"He betrayed you, this dude. He was your friend?" Dean looking at him... can't even answer the question (19:59)

Dean says Cas' betrayal is something he cant get over like everything else. And that he doesn't know why. "It doesn't matter why." "Of course it matters!" (20:25)

Dean gets visibly uneasy about Meg being so close to Cas (25:34) jealous boyfriend is jealous

Dean doesn't want Cas to remember, afraid he'll leave again (32:18)

"I've known you for years!" (32:34) poor baby. Also "You're an angel." "Uhm, I'm sorry? Is that a flirtation?" DEAN'S FACE (32:42)

Dean doesn't want Cas to be hurt by his own memories and past actions (33:00)

"You used to fight together. Bestest friends, actually." Yeah, look at that reaction. Let's see how he reacts to being called his boyfriend later on (33:09)

#MARRIED!!! I'll just leave this. No comment (33:41)

As Cas regains his memories, only 2 of the ones we see are not of Dean. And the only one we hear is the "I'm sorry, Dean." . That is what matters to Cas (and this looks like a slash video. Kudos to the editors) "I remember you... I remember everything." Yeah, no-homo save (34:35)

Not even an hour earlier, Dean was ranting about Cas betraying him, how he couldn't forget and forgive him, and now he is saying Cas did "the best you could at the time", but Cas actually feels guilt and doesn't want Dean to defend him, but Dean does anyway (36:53)

"We didn't part as friends, Dean." "*looks at Cas up and down*... So what?" "I deserved to die." the look on Dean's face (37:18)

Dean gives Cas his trench coat back. The trench coat he kept, folded and all the the truck, for weeks. And that's not even Baby. So he moved the coat, to always have it with him (37:26). I'm not crying, shut up

Also, here, have a deleted scene that breaks my heart

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Episode 20:

Let us all appreciate that one time Dean helped a lesbian flirt with a dude (24:27-25:03)

Episode 21:

Dean is devastated about Cas' mental state, that he did that to himself to save Sam. Look at his eyes in this scene (16:08). Also, Dean still resents Cas for the whole 'New God' crap, but it feels like the real reason is the fact that he left (19:18)

"Cas! Don't make me pull this car over!" "Are you angry? Why are you angry? *puppy eyes*" "... No I-I'm..." #MARRIED (27:28)

Cas says he won't fight anymore, but as soon as Dean's in trouble, he FLIPS

"The angels... they don't care... I think maybe they don't have the equipment to care." (31:49) Touchy much, Dean?, are you trying to convince yourself about that? It feels like he's making excuses to not let himself feel anything for Cas. "It seems like when they try, it just... breaks them apart." ... OK, fuck everything, ICWAW this would totally be seen as romantic angsty reference to Cas

Cas is so lost in his guilt for what he has caused. He looks like a baby, and it gets worse when it comes to Dean

"Why should we give you anything? After everything you have taken from us? The very touch of you curropts. When Castiel first laid a hand on you in Hell, he was lost!" (36:50) okay damn, ICWAW all of this would seem as if they were talking about a love relationship between the two and you can't tell me otherwise

'HURT HUSBAND-MUST PROTECT MODE' (37:17)

"The bone of a righteous mortal and the blood of a fallen angel" ... shut up, I'm dying over these clues (39:11)

"What are you gonna do, Cas?" Dean's eyes are begging him to stay. ICWAW, we would point that out without a shadow of a doubt (39:40)

Episode 23:

"Dude... on my car. He showed up naked... covered in bees!" ... come on, ICWAW this would be a HUGE deal (5:10)

"Go ask him. He was your boyfriend first." (8:51) LISTEN HERE. I study psychology, and one of the first things they teach you is that jokes are based on the truth. HOW MANY OF THESE JOKES WERE MADE?! HUH??!! (plus all the "Dick" jokes Sam made) Also Dean's reaction with the jaw clentch... just saying

Cas keeps stating he doesn't want to fight, but again, Dean's in trouble? FIGHT MODE

"*soft shoulder touch, puppy eyes, serves Dean a sandwich*" ... SOFT #MARRIED COUPLE (18:27)

"You got anything to say on the topic of dicks?" you'd like that, wouldn't you, Dean? (26:42)

Cas is afraid he will do something to cause Dean more trouble. Let's remember he chose what he believed were his last words to be "I'm sorry, Dean.", but as we know, Dean deals with feelings by showing anger... Cas gets upset and copes by playing twister... pathetic. "I can't help. [...] I destroyed everything and I will destroy everything again!" for a moment, Cas is lucid, and expresses his fear, but as soon as Dean gets angry with him, Cas gows back to hide in his world of crazy (26:47)

"I'm not good luck, Dean." "... You know what? [...] I'd rather have you. Cursed or not." Look at Cas' soft little smile as it grows. ICWAW, this would be read as another confession (32:38)

"I'll go with you." SOFT

SEE??! The MOMENT Dick threatens Dean, Cas goes full Angel of the Lord on his ass. MUST PROTECT HUSBAND (36:52) and the utter shock on Dean's face is priceless

And here comes PurGAYtory

[Season 8>>]