#but i'm so sick of seeing avoidant people get treated like they're making up a problem out of thin air

[starryeyedseeker]

Honestly my heart goes out to those people who can't bring themselves to do their school/work tasks because they're crushed by how intimidating it all feels. Or those who do their best but can't shake off that terror as they're doing it. Or those who kinda come close to ruining their professional lives because their inner fictional world is much more comforting than the real one, but still do their best to not let everything fall apart.

Like you know you've got tons to do. You know your success - heck, maybe your livelihood- is hinging on it. But you just can't. Everything is so intimidating and you're trying to get yourself to move, but your fictional world will comfort you and tell you that you're awesome, while the real will punch you down and it's up to you to stay afloat because if you drown, it sure as hell won't help you.

A lot of the way we've structured this world is scary. I just remembered that post about the modern world being built on denying human limitations and fuck is that an accurate post. And now with the current state of politics/society/whatever Gen-Z are n for a scarier time.

If you're putting off answering that email, if your hands are shaking and you whisper meek encouragements to yourself as you type, if you're thinking about the comfort your fictional world gives you and that makes you sad because why the hell can't the real world be like that? My heart goes out to you. You're not lazy, stupid or trying to skirt by 'real work'. You're just torn between survival and its difficulty and I'm so proud if you manage to finish the intimidating task even if it's not perfect or you were scared while doing it.

[writingwithcolor]

Dark features/people as blessed, white and light people as sick

ladyoftheseastuff asked:

I'm writing a fantasy story where the world is permanently covered in snow & ice. The people share a common culture & are loyal to their city states, but they are not homogeneous in appearance; there will be many, many characters coded as PoC. The main religion centers on the sun, & those with dark features are 'favoured' by the sun god, while pale people or anyone who has white/blonde hair are thought vulnerable to "snow sickness", a disease caused by environmental factors (1/2) & have other rules and customs to gain religious approval. It's dangerous & infectious but not well understood. It affects social standing and opportunities, but it's meant to be tied with ideas of youth, vitality, & fear of aging & sickness: it's not limited to those coded as white. This is a cultural detail and not part of the main conflict, but I want to avoid unintentional allegories/parallels & fetishization. Is this a concept that's too close to crossing any of those lines? (2/2)

This feels less like a means to show dark skinned people in an empowering light and more like a weak attempt at subversion. My primary concern (which you have not specified) is how do the "blessed" class treat the "sickly" so to speak. We have fantasy stories like The Grisha Trilogy and Girls of Paper and Fire, which deal with magical ability/feature-based segregation and conflict.

In both cases there is a sense of entitlement which comes with hailing from the "favoured" class, quite obvious, since there will always be an inherent othering metaphor whenever you create such a division, whether it was meant to be a source of conflict or not.

However, the two mentioned series use the "magical people are blessed, non magical people are to be pitied" arc which is somewhat more subtle than divisions created just on the basis of skin colour.

Disclaimer as I do not have albinism or vitiligo: The latter can be extremely harmful, and not just in a racial context, but in cases of albinism, vitiligo etc.

~Mod Mimi

The pitfalls of subversions

While it is always lovely to see dark features considered in a favorable way, there are some issues you may come across. Such a story could easily end up dressing those you wished to uphold as bad guys in the readers' eyes, even if the story's society and the sun god etc. thinks they're amazing, and white and light people as the victims of dark people, deserving reader sympathy. This may especially be the case based on how these groups get treated in the story.

These sort of subversions lean dangerously into "reverse discrimination" plots which are not overall accurate or favorable allegories for your real, human audience. There being diversity on both sides doesn't necessary fix this issue or remove racial or ethnic implications. On that note, and as Mimi mentioned, being demonized and ostracized particularly for skin and genetic disorders like albinism is already a thing. What does your concept say of them?

I think Dark/Black as good and Light/white as bad is a doable concept. Your concept differs a bit from simply subverting black/white tropes. This is not just Black good guys and night skies being peaceful or neutral. It's not just white/light villains (as opposed to victims) or snow symbolling death or sickness.

White and light people are quite blatantly being declared as sick and unfavored and they may very well be victims in the reader's eye with the dark people being the villainous, unsympathetic bunch. Is this your intention?

More to consider

Such a concept requires thoughtful, careful planning and intentional writing. You should have an understanding of what your story implies to the readers and the real-life takeaways.

I think it's possible to make dark skin the favored skin of the sun god without it meaning white/light people stand in a negative light and are sick or unworthy.

Consider what it is that you like about the concept of your story. Can you keep the essence of whatever it is that excites you about your ideas, without denying a whole group of people favor? If not, how will you go about telling such a tale that is not meant to symbolize a sort of reversal of roles discrimination?

Why does the sun god get to determine what is good?

Are there other gods that might have different strong opinions? Perhaps who is favored varies by time of day, season, region, culture, god?

Can dark skin get its favor without white and light features being deemed unfavorable as a whole?

How big of a deal does this favor have to be? I advise reconsidering it being the point of discrimination to white/light people for all the reasons already described.

No matter the directions you go, please research and get the appropriate beta-readers for feedback on the in-depth concepts and story.

~Mod Colette

[xesiarah]

“˚₊‧ UNLUCKY ENCOUNTER ‧₊˚ ”

Yan!Loser oc x Reader

Synopsis — some call it a coincidence, some say it's fate, but I say it's absolute utter fucking, bullshit.

—

—

"I'm sorry."

The other line hangs up, the irrational telephone beep ringing against your ear as you genuinely start feeling the symptoms of hysteria bubbling up your chest and clamming up your breathing. At this point you definitely wouldn't say no to a fucking lobotomy.

This week has been feeling like the universe is actively trying to kill you off, like as if already getting coffee spilled on you wasn't bad enough; You, in this modern age and time having to use the telephone because your phone was snatched, along with your favorite handbag, containing the newly expensive perfume you brought still half full, and then just now your partner of 2 years breaks up with you after you asked them for help because you tripped on a rock, resulting on a sprained ankle and having to distressingly limp all the way to the phone booth.

Coincidence? Yeah, I think not. Just before this hell week was 3 days after your best friend ditched you for her new boyfriend, 4 days after you fucked up an important exam, and A WEEK after you befriended that jackass freak at school. Losing a few people here and there was to be expected but, c'mon! Isn't this just a new form of torture? You're sure that he was the one that caused all this, who else is to blame!? Maybe the rumor that said he must have all that hair to hide the dent he got when he was dropped as a baby was true, I mean. He probably performed some dark sorcery on you for whatever reason.. or maybe he's a sick masochist that fucks over people who don't treat him like an accused witch during the Salem Witch Trials. — Seriously, it was as if the universe's will to make that mfs life a living hell has rubbed off on you. But you know what, yeah.. It's fine, you can live with this.

Or not. Your alarm blaring for you to awaken gladly disturbs your nightmarish slumber, this is the 3rd time. The THIRD TIME! You've dreamt about him. — of that freak that brought you to your misery, who knows, what if dreaming about him more then once was some sort of bad omen? The 3rd time being on the first day of the week nonetheless. Of course the birds are extra chirper, you thought that maybe they're basking on your torment, if they were, you hope stray bullets manages to shoot all of them dead because we aren't having that kind of bullshit today. — You have finally devised a plan to avoid Satan's reincarnate for the rest of the school year as if they were carrying a covid variant. Finally getting that horrendous goblin off your back would feel like it's the second coming of Christ, and you're not about to let any twinks get in the way of living your life free from any agony inducing minger either.

You manage to find the will to exist. Entering the gates of your school muttering prayers to God, and whatever other deity that’s listening, to please not let you set sights of his probably-smells-like-cheese, greasy ass hair, the overgrown bangs covering ⅔ of his hazel eyes that always seemed to bother you, he even has those weird Incel glasses on.. maybe that one rumor that said he had some sort of eye fungus just makes this all more oddly debatable. You wander through the empty hallways, not seeing a single student kinda unsettles you. — makes sense though, It's pretty early, and you've never seen him around this time so, the coast is clear, for now, or so you thought. — You were approaching the rows of vending machines all pushed up against the back of the building when you caught a glimpse of a silhouette you're all too familiar with, he seems to be sketching something, not that you totally cared for whatever it was. You shrug, but when you were about to turn to leave he gets up and walks towards the boys bathroom, leaving his precious notebook unattended, out in the open, where anyone could take a peak... Just a little peak, alright? You tiptoed, walking towards it in longer strides to minimize your footsteps, upon getting closer, you notice the front page already wide open, as if he purposely left it like that, — that should've been the first red flag. Because inspecting it a little further made your jaw slack, the thing he was sketching.. was you. "What the fuck, I look amazing." You mutter, it's a little creepy but you're flattered with the way he straight up beautified you, admiring it for a little longer then you should've had was a mistake though, because just when you took your eyes off of the notebook, you see him literally lurking and hiding behind the bathroom's entrance. He's wide-eyed, and a huge creepy grin plastered on his face. — Genuinely scaring the flattery out of you and making you bolt straight to the opposite direction on instinct, the way he looked at you literally triggered your flight or fight. The sound of your fast footsteps filled the hallways, your heart going pitter-patter, quite literally about to burst out your chest. Fuck. Just your luck. Guess this won't be an easy day to get through.

Morning lectures are finally over. Which means you can finally celebrate the fact that you pushed through and made it to lunchtime! It was still agonizing nonetheless, waiting around corners to let him pass kind of felt like you're stalking him, can't say that you didn't get any weird looks either. The worse part was definitely him searching and skimming through the halls, asking everyone for your whereabouts, half of them made themselves look busy so he wouldn't approach them, and the other half straight up ran the opposite direction as if he threatened to bite their toes or something. Weirdly enough, most of them ended up slipping on wet floor, which just further gives in to your suspicion of him practicing dark sorcery. Anyways, you're proud of the little progress you made, and that's all that matters for now.

—

—

Lucian sits alone, his table is tucked away in the very corners of the cafeteria, no one even daring to glance at his direction, he used to typically eat in the bathrooms but nobody wants him in their presence to the point that they all stand up and leave when he approaches a table. — there's just this weird air surrounding the dude that automatically repels people away, and no it's not body oder dammit! He just gets greasy fast, and probably for threatening to unalive a teacher but that isn't important! The love of his life is avoiding him! He chews on his fingernails as he ponders, possible reasons fill his head, and they aren't very good ones. — Did someone make you do this? Is there someone else...? That surely can't be. That's just cheating isn't it? You love him after all! He saw the glint in your eyes when you looked at the portrait he drew of you. He could even show you his shrine! Made just for you, containing such precious things you lost! — His excessive chewing of his fingernails grow desperate to the point of drawing blood, he grimaces at the sight of crimson streaks, wiping it on the sleeves of his hoodie. — it just can't be. Why would you do him wrongly like this? You smiled at him, you laughed with him instead of AT him, you sat together.. So why!? Are you gonna leave him like his mother did..? Was that all a joke to you..? He just couldn't accept this, you aren't that kind of person! You know what, he finally snaps. he just has to hear an answer from you. — "He's right behind me, isn't he?" The person right Infront of you nods, and immediately scurries away. At this point you're frozen in place, what the fuck do you do? Just make a run for it? "Can we please talk..?" He speaks behind you, his hand is on your shoulder. You swallow, the remaining bits of your conscience crumbling as you fucking make a run for it, aggressive footsteps follow behind and you realize HE'S CHASING AFTER YOU. You have never let out such a gut wrenching scream than what you just did in this exact moment. — You hide behind a wall, thinking you've lost him. Not until a hand grabs onto your arm.

—

—

He caught you. He has you pinned against the wall, not in a shoujo cutsy romantic way, he looks as if he's a starved vampire about to chomp on your neck, and not in a good way. Just no fucking way this scrawny mf outran you. Another 'unfortunately' for you too, the Gods did not answer your prayers. You're trapped in between the arms of the man you swore to avoid like the plague for the rest of the school year, this was definitely not on your 2024 bingo list. You didn't even last till' the end of the day and that lowkey hurts your pride. — But holy smokes, they say that you experience something new everyday, and this is the first time you've seen him up close, messy bedroom hair, teary eyes that looked like he hasn't slept since the first star wars movie came out. Wowza. If he actually made an effort, or if he didn't have such unsettling vibes, you can't lie, he'd be a revelation hottie. — ... Shit. Not the time to be thinking about his potential glow up. — Poor guy, watching him trying to maintain eye contact but just failing horribly is kinda cute.

......

......

......

The fuck? Your face scrunches up just after you snap back out of, whatever that was. Seriously.. say WHAT now? That was a demon possession right there, you need to stop acting as if his existence didn't just cause your downfall unprovoked. "You're avoiding me.." His voice disrupts the silent war you were having with yourself. It sounded meek, he genuinely looked like a shivering wet dog, with those.. tears boiling up his eyes, and.. quivering lips. Fuck. What if you'd just slide down his arms and escape? Hell no, if someone walked in they'd think you were giving him a blowjob and that's honestly worse then whatever's going on right now. "A-Answer me!" He yells(?) hesitantly, the dude genuinely looks like he's about to burst into tears any minute, you're surprised how he somehow grew the balls to yell at you though. "Okay, dude I'm sorry..?" — It's sad how he goes ballistic over a 'friendship' that lasted a week, but he did show you the list of student names he wanted to glock, and you listened to some of his nerdy ramblings, so you guess he did cherish your short time together even if you gave him absolutely zero fucks. — he goes completely quiet for a minute before he finally bursts out crying, fat tears are running through his acne filled face as he drops to the ground. "I really just wanted a someone-" He says in-between hiccups, he's crying as if you killed his mom or something. You decided to just wait it out until he grew tired but his wails started growing louder till' you were forced to crouch down and comfort him. "H-hey, uhm.." Fuck. Screw it. You know what, Who cares if your life starts crashing down, it already was unsalvageable from the very beginning anyway. Everyone needs a friend and you're too nice for this. You finally give in, breathing in a sigh of defeat. "How can I fix this?" His cries shimmer down and you swear to fucking God you think you just saw him flash a smirk. This bitch looks like he's bout to spit out the most outta pocket bullshit. — and he indeed did not disappoint. The two unexpected words coming out of his mouth just further inspires you to jump off a bridge. "d-date.. me."

......

......

......

Maybe hiring a hitman on yourself wouldn't be so bad.

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

This will be more of a personal post sprinkled with some thoughts on AYS?!, so for those interested strictly in shipping content, you can skip this.

I couldn't help myself yesterday to wait until my work schedule was done. So I watched the first two episodes during lunch break and work, while using the keyboard from time to time to not appear offline.

And then a second time in the evening, without as many interruptions. I even texted my sister to remind her that the episodes have been released (she has JK's songs on her playlists and that's where it stops). My tone was very casual, as if I just remembered it was already up. As if I haven't actually been thinking and obsessing about that show for a year now. But that's because I can't let this online, fandom "life" seep through my other, "real" one. I've always struggled with my feelings of shame over being part of such spaces. Which is why I avoided them completely. Up until four years ago. I'm still dealing with it. I don't want to tell people that I have an interest in a kpop ship and that it's been ongoing for a few years now. It feels to foreign to the image I allow others to have of me and this kpop stuff is childish to say the least. I've fallen victim to the talking points I've argued against intellectually. But life doesn't work that way. My rational brain doesn't get along with my feelings.

So I keep my thoughts about shipping, fandoms, jikook here. And I share them with friends and people that have a connection to it. It's why I have a blog. So I can post a photo of jikook holding hands at the beginning of their journey and at least 10 people will understand it cause they like the same thing. I'm not a loser on my own here so the thought feels comforting.

I didn't have specific expectations about AYS?!, but I felt happy watching it. It was different, but a good different. Having the opporrtunity to witness them from morning till evening without any interruptions painted an interesting picture and it's the first time to see some parts of their dynamic.

They bicker, they flirt, they get lovingly annoyed, they get bored, they get silent, they get touchy. It feels more real than any 2-min clip from a Memories DVD could possibly show us. I don't want picture perfect jikook because it doesn't exist. Being in stan spaces, all I see everyday is worship, a mentality that is then transfered to the people surrounding the idol. But I don't want JK to worship Jimin 24/7 or vice versa. That's not a real relationship of any kind. I want to see them treat each other like they're just people. Which is what they did. Too bad that some have interpreted that as negative when in fact all we got were clear signs of actual closeness. And nothing beats it like Jungkook's attitude towards Jimin being sick. Shippers/supporters have clips and endless arguments on hand to explain the closeness between jikook, but honestly? That first evening in the cabin when JM was in the bathroom and subsequently the next morning should be the sole argument from now on. It can't be more obvious if it hit us in the head.

It's not about needing confirmation at every step of them being a couple. At least I don't need that. In the long run, it wouldn't even matter if they're not. What's noticeable is that they appear to be one and that doesn't come out of thin air.

Is my mood volatile these days? Yes. Actually these past few months. Do I need this show as one of those feel good series? Definitely, because there's nothing else out there to catch my attention in terms of tv content. I don't want to pick apart and poke holes and question every single line to make myself feel miserable. Everything else is too bad and I am too lame so I rely on this show for a short, temporary thing that improves my mood. I don't care about other things, doubts or worries. I really really just want to enjoy jikook doing whatever they want. I don't have high standards.

[ed-recovery-affirmations]

I got posted to a subreddit dedicated to bullying overweight people. They're claiming that I'm faking being anorexic, that I'm glamourizing the disorder, and that I actually have BED. All because I said fat people can have anorexia

Now I just want to get worse. I read through half of the comments before I couldn't stomach anymore.

How can I want to recover when this is the reaction to the way I am now?

God, that sucks! I'm so so sorry anon. That's really painful.

Everything you said is true. I've absolutely known fat people who restricted heavily and remained fat, or who lost some weight but never reached a "straight size" no matter how much they starved. It's truly fucked up to see how differently a visibly thin person is treated when they restrict dangerously versus how fat people are treated when they do the very same thing. I'm sorry you've struggled this way unseen, I'm sorry it's so hard to get people to take it seriously, and I'm so so sorry that people suck so bad in the way they react to hearing things they don't like about your body type.

Honestly, some corners of the Internet - especially Reddit - are just toxic as hell. As an example, when I was first researching disability rights, I came across somebody who posted about their life with multiple medical conditions. In spite of this person being a genuine ray of light in the lives of those who knew them, they were posted to a subreddit called "IllnessFakers" where people post about others that they suspect have Munchausen Syndrome. This person was a frequent subject of discussion on this sub. Now, as it turns out, this person wasn't faking it - in fact, a few years back, they actually did succumb to health complications from these medical issues (complicated by heavy failings of the system) and do you think anyone on the subreddit apologized? Nope, someone posted jokingly that this person's tombstone should read "I told you I was sick!"

I realize that's a fucked up thing to share, but I hope it makes you feel better to know you're not alone. The world is a fucked up place sometimes. What I recommend you do now is to just block and avoid all internet spaces like that one. Seriously, you're not gonna stop these people from being shitheads and it sounds like you're not getting any benefit from hearing about what they're saying. I hope that one day you are able to find others in your close personal life who listen, hear you, and treat you as a person of worth. I hope you're able to find the peace and healing to think of yourself that way, too - to listen to your own opinion of yourself rather than the opinions of the multiple assholes with whom we must, for better or worse, share a planet. I'm sorry that so many people are going to give you the devastating experience of not believing you when you try to talk about the experience of being fat with a restrictive ED. I wish I could take that pain and frustration away. But for right now, all I can tell you is to avoid the worst of the Internet cesspools, seek those who want to hear you, and know that these kinds of people are not who you want to base your self-worth off of. If you hate yourself, they win. Don't let them win. Rebel with love for yourself.

[gorogues]

it-is-i-zim replied to your ask post: This is just my opinion but Ostrander's revamp of him was the worst thing thing to happen to him character wise. Fans of Boomerang are sometimes straight up harassed for what Ostrander did to his character. Like on one hand, one of the reasons why he was on the suicide squad for so long and we see him AT ALL is because of Ostrander but I'm sick of being called racist because of how my guy was written by Ostrander.

it-is-i-zim replied to your ask post: Identity Crisis was bad for Digger still though. It also made me kinda dislike Tim Drake fans but I also get that for ages their only exposure to Boomer was that comic. And the Knight Terrors: Robin comic bringing that comic back into the established canon did no favors either seeing that it was through the eyes of someone who wasn’t even there. An artistic choice for sure, but it’s also made Tim Drake fans feral about how AWFUL Digger is.

Unfortunately this is more of a fan problem than a writing one. I definitely sympathize with people who love pre-Crisis Digger but hate his post-Crisis self, because modern Digger can be a lot. But people being jerks to other fans because of it is 100% a problem with fandom, and it's got to stop. There's nothing wrong with liking problematic characters as long as you're honest about their flaws, because they aren't real people and they haven't actually hurt anyone real…and just because you like them doesn't mean you approve of everything they do.

It's also fine for people to dislike a character or avoid other fans if they make you uncomfortable for any reason, but it shouldn't get to the point of mistreating a real person over fictional stories and liking/disliking fictional things.

(To make things extremely personal for a moment, it took me over 25 years to figure out why I gravitate to unpopular villains: it was only once I understood that I was the family scapegoat that I realized I like unpopular villains because I'd been considered one/treated like one my entire life. People can have their reasons for liking villains and problematic characters that have nothing to do with the shittiest thing(s) the character(s) have done.)

it-is-i-zim replied to your ask post: And with Owen, arguably his worst characterization was in that one Supergirl comic where he tried to get with a 15 year old Supergirl while being established as an adult man and was like, “I’m not a creep” but then on the same page also called her “jailbait” which uh… Gross. I must say I’m not fond of him because of that and therefore didn’t mind the kinda bad revamp back in Suicide Squad (2016) #47

The question was "the most common way they're written badly", and while that was weird and creepy, it was thankfully just a brief anomaly in the Supergirl book (that's why his strange Rebirth revamp didn't get my pick; it was just one story). I found Owen's intelligence and skill level varied wildly throughout his appearances, and sometimes he was competent and sometimes he was a clueless dumbass. He seemed reasonably smart in his debut story, so IMO him being an idiot was the primary example of being written badly.

it-is-i-zim replied to your ask post: Sorry that my thoughts are kinda all over the place on the Captain Boomerangs.

That's completely okay, it's why we're all here! :)

parkakingrolo replied to your ask post: I'm gonna go a little against the grain on Lisa, and say some of her other characterizations I'm not too fond of are when she's now the moral compass, and I agree The Rogues should have a stronger one, but forcing it on Lisa feels awkward. Don't get me started on when she hinted at feelings for Barry too. Maybe it's just two extremes and they struggle for a healthy middle.

Yeah, that's fair. That one's a problem too, though the one I mentioned bothers me more so I guess that's why I went with it. Truthfully I think both versions are manifestations of sexist beliefs about women, one benevolent ("women are morally better than men") and one misogynist ("women are crazy bitches, especially ex-girlfriends" -- and on that note, I really hate what was done to Magenta by Waid and Johns. She should have been included on the previous list).

It would be good if DC strove for some middle ground between the two, because Lisa should be flawed but not constantly jonesing to slash people's faces.

[dahvampire]

I'll start this thing with the premise that I've only seen BNHA's anime, so I'm at the end of the events of season 6 and I don't know anything else from the manga. So, that's also a spoiler alert for anyone who isn't at my same point.

God I really, really despise Enji Todoroki.

Endeavor is a great hero, don't get me wrong: always on point, efficient with criminals, saves people and yada yada yada. Public interactions aren't his forte but anyone has his weaknesses, so it's fine.

But boy, boy if he's shitty. A shitty father, a shitty husband, a shitty person in general.

How can you beat your six year old son to the point of making him sick just because you're salty you're not at the same level of someone else? How can you try to erase your first son's suicide attempt that he did because you first indoctrinated him about being the n°1 hero since he was four and then discarded him at eleven because he couldn't keep up with your expectations? Enji told Touya his life was defined only by being a hero, and then he snutched the dream he put in his son's head from him when he was still a child. No wonders Touya didn't exactly take it well, his father just said he's actually worthless because of something Touya can't even control - the affinity that his body has for cold temperature.

And okay, maybe Enji wanted to keep him safe avoiding him to train, but the adult approached the situation wrongly from the start, since Touya's birth, for fuck's sake.

When Touya became useless, Enji focused his fixation on Shouto, feeding sibling rivalry to Touya and making him easily jealous of him because his younger brother became their father's focus of attention - and love, in his mind - .

Let's put the kids beside for a second.

Enji married Rei for her quirk, that's common knowledge, he even admitted it. After he finished using her for his convenience and after probably treating her just like he treated Shouto and Touya, he pushed her 'til the breaking point and then accused her of being unstable while the only reason for her unstableness has always been his presence in her life. We had a snippet of Rei before she married Enji, and she was a perfectly fine woman. Maybe reserved, but fine.

Then, Enji happened. She lost her rights on her body, the man married her just to breed a valuable heir after all. She lost her rights as a mother, because I think Enji hasn't ever allowed her to interfere with Touya and Shouto's education and lives in general, just think about how Touya treated her when she found out he was still training in secret. She lost her connections with the world, too, I guess, because I don't think she would be free to go and come at her will, considering how Enji thinks about his family members as his properties.

Then, she slowly started to lose her mind to the point of disfiguring her own child because his eye reminded her too much of the man she was forced to live with even though she clearly dreaded him, and she lost it. She crumbled under the pressure of what Enji did to her and to her children - that I guess she never actively tried to protect, maybe to save herself from the man's wrath, maybe because scared of aggravating things - and Enji took her out of the picture without even try to comprehend why she did what she did.

I'm not saying that she isn't guilty about the whole situation, I'm saying I can see her redemption arc. I can understand it. Now she's free of the shackles that held her down the whole time she was with Enji, and she wants to try and do something to make amends. I can see it, I can understand it.

What I cannot understand is the thing they're trying to do with Enji's redemption arc.

Like, are you kidding me?

He's an abuser, a manipulative man who hides himself behind a façade of ideals and stoicism, a person who looked his own kid in the eye at the age of eleven and told him he was not enough for his father and should get lost with his other two siblings, casted aside since birth because they too didn't meet his expectations.

Fuyumi is still hanging by the threads of hope that someday they will be an happy and functional family, but those threads started strangling her a long time ago, and I think she didn't even realized it yet.

And Touya.

God, Touya. He attempted suicide by the age of fourteen, being it consciously or not. Maybe he actually did it on purpose, maybe his emotions took the upper hand on him, but his mind couldn't accept the fact that his father's love was so conditional. Touya tried his best to satisfy the man, and Enji never acknowledged him beside to berate him for training without his permission. And Touya still tried, tried, tried to be seen by the man that put himself at the center of his child's universe since Touya was young enough to comprehend what heroes were.

No wonders Touya broke that night on Sekoto Peak, no wonder he died.

No wonder Dabi was born.

He's the incarnation of Touya's resentment after all, of the hate he feels towards Enji, towards the society that idolatries the hero without looking at the man, without understand that the monsters people fear aren't always the criminals and the villains on the streets, but hide themselves in plain sight, under a spotlight.

Touya was fourteen, he had all his life in front of him, and he still chose to trust the man he called father to care for him even without the incentive of his quirk, and his trust, his prayers fell on deaf ears.

I don't know yet what happened after Sekoto Peak, I guess what remained of Touya was find by someone - maybe Shigaraki's doctor himself -, put back together and brought back from the dead. And Touya didn't know what to do with the time that someone else borrowed him, so he set himself on the path of revenge to find some sort of justice for himself.

I'm not saying that Dabi's modus operandi is right. He's a murderer and his ways are almost always extreme, and his mind clearly isn't in the right place, but I can still understand him, his motives.

An hypothetical reception arc.

Before everything else he's a victim, after all, just like Rei.

Dabi wants to avenge what's remaining of Touya, of his inner child, and the only way he finds fitting is to take Enji's life to compensate the life Enji took from him.

Enji, on the other hand, doesn't deserve it.

He has seen that his ways were wrong only when everything came crushing down on him, and he cried on his hospital bed about being a terrible person after all the years he spent without questioning even one single time his actions.

How many times he made Touya cry? And Shouto? And Rei, Natsuo, Fuyumi? And his own fans, for God's sake? How many people he deluded without realising it, without even thinking it was an actual chance of him doing wrong?

Nope. Sorry, nope, I'm not fine with that. I don't think he deserves the pardon of all the victims of his actions, or surely he doesn't deserve to be forgiven so fast.

I don't approve the death of characters only because I don't like them, I know that's not how it works and it's simply stupid wanting someone dead just because, but fuck if i want him dead. Like, actually dead. Maybe it's because what he represents hit a little too close to home, maybe it's because I can't see a possible way to actually redeem him without stomping again on everyone he hurt, maybe I just can't stand him, I don't know.

I don't even know if I actually want Dabi to be still alive, at this point. I really like him, his character, his dramatics, but he's a dead man walking, literally. Maybe death would put an end to his suffering, maybe confronting Enji would be so cathartic to actually help him to recover the parts of his mind that he lost in the flames, in the walls of the house he grew up in, among the discouragements and the conditioned love he almost drown into.

The only thing I know is that I really hope Dabi lives long enough to see Enji's ashes scattering to the ground, being them the ashes of Endeavor's legacy or the ashes of his own body, cremated by Dabi himself.

[smolgloves]

The Trial

Summary: Freya is reunited with her cousin, but must face a trial for breaking the rules

Tw: mentions of death, mentions of slavery, transphobia/enbyphobia, deadnaming

Deep underground, unbeknownst to the people of Skaars Hollow, was a colony of borrowers. Tunnels were painstakingly carved by the tiny people to keep such a large group hidden from the larger beings. Uncle Eskel said it was better that way, but after sitting in the empty room with only four dirt walls to keep her trapped, Freya started to wonder if this way was truly keeping her people safe or if this was merely a way to keep them sheltered.

The door creaked open and a figure not much taller than Freya slipped in. “I can't stay here long but you need to tell me everything.”

“Kes!” Freya jumped up from the bedroll and practically tackled her cousin into a hug. His arms wrapped around her and she was fully embraced in the familiar scent of smoke and ash that clung to him. “I was worried sick about you.” He said, trying to sound stern but the crack in his voice gave himself away.

“I know, I'm sorry.” Freya pulled away from Kes to meet his gray eyes. Soot smeared his round cheeks; when Freya slipped out of the border, he was still in the forge. Gods, he must have been searching for her since last night! “I thought I could get more supplies beyond the border.”

“I figured that much,” Kes sighed, taking Freya by the hand and sitting down on the bedroll with her. “But I need to know if you were spotted by that group that caused havoc in Huskin's Tavern.”

Freya tucked her knees to her chest, despite being close to Kes, she still struggled to meet his worrisome gaze. Unlike her, Kes was a more cautious and secluded borrower who didn't care to leave the safety of the walls. To him, there was uncertainty when one ventured out to larger being territory, and he refused to be put in a position where he might get caught. So he opted to be the colony's blacksmith, while Freya looked for supplies for him. They made a pretty good team, but that still didn't make telling Kes what happened any easier. “I got caught last night by that group.”

“By the gods, are you alright?!” Kes grabbed onto her shoulders and began studying her for any signs of injuries. “One of the scouts said you were covered in blood! Which one hurt you?!”

“I'm fine, really!” Freya shoved her cousin away, but flashed a smile. “It takes more than a few travelers to knock me down.”

“I'm glad this experience hasn't shaken your confidence, but this is serious.” He sighed. “What happened out there?”

“They didn't want me to head back home alone, and agreed to escort me back.” Freya avoided eye contact as she uttered those words, yet the horror that radiated off of him was palpable. “They were already planning on coming to town for some business.”

“What kind of business?”

“They were going after the goblins that terrorize the outskirts of the town and their leader wants to investigate the plague.” Freya took a shaky breath, fearing Kes’ reaction. “I think they're going to help us.”

Kes stared at her like she was suddenly growing horns and a tail. “Help us or help the real townsfolk?”

“All of us, Kes!” She exclaimed. “They seem like… good people.”

“Large ones don't help borrowers.” He clenched his jaw. “And if they do, it's never for the right reasons.”

Freya was no stranger when Kes acted this way, she knew what he had been through and thirteen years later, he still was traumatized by the raid of their colony. Normally, Freya would leave him alone to mourn his losses, but in a few hours, Freya would have to stand before the elders and face a trial that may not stand in her favor. Her only hope was to persuade Kes into seeing her point of view. She placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. “I don't know how else to explain it, but they're different.” Freya sighed softly, thinking about how Tav treated her, and wondered of their fate. Did they survive or were they already dead? Freya had to push those thoughts out of her head, Tav had to be fine. If they haven't fallen to the illithid parasite, then surely they wouldn't fall to Huskin! “Their leader speaks with such passion and kindness.”

Kes hastily shushed her. “You know better than to talk like that!”

“I'm just thinking about our colony!” Freya retorted. “We've been hurt by the plague too, and they have a lead on how to end it, maybe if we asked-!”

“You're going to get exiled or executed If you keep talking like this!” Kes hissed out, a fierce glare met locked onto her before fading away. He sighed. “Look, maybe there are nice large ones out there, but you need to play this smart. Tell them you were scared, be vague, do that and your punishment might not be so severe. Please, I can't lose you, Freya.”

“Okay.” Freya nodded, there was no getting through to him. Pride and fear kept a lot of borrowers in line, it was usually a life saver but Freya feared that would soon be their downfall if the plague continued to spread.

~~~~

Freya tugged at the sleeves of her green blouse, the questions had been relentless since the trial began, it didn't help when the entire colony had gathered around to listen to her brush with danger. She told them the story about getting caught by Astarion, meeting Tav and the rest of the group, and having to stay until morning; she of course, left out certain details that might make the colony panic more, but the main story was the truth.

“And they just let you go?” Asked uncle Eskel.

“Yes.”

“Why?” Uncle Eskel's stone gray eyes bore into Freya. He was definitely the spitting Image of Kes, but where her cousin showed more kindness and sympathy when he looked at Freya, uncle Eskel only showed a stern disapproval. The two quarreled for a long time, as to why, that remained a mystery. Whatever the reason, Freya knew she wouldn't get any pardons for simply being the elder's niece.

“They… didn't see a use in keeping me.” Freya sighed. “The group had better things to do than keep a borrower around.”

Murmurs spread around the room speculating how a borrower would simply be let go. Then one elder named Whitcomb broke through the crowd. “Preposterous, a larger being wouldn't let a borrower go!” He shook a bony fist in the air. “We are too valuable on the black market.”

“Ta- The halfling showed empathy when they met me.” Quizzical looks painted the faces of the five elders, none of them could wrap their heads around a larger one being nice to a borrower. “Their priority was to figure out what was causing the plague in Skaars Hollow, they had no time to… sell me off.”

“Why are they curious about the plague?” The elder named Petrona asked. She was a woman in her forties, the youngest elder of the five. The only reason she was appointed was because her mother- the previous elder, had gotten sick from the very plague and was likely to die.

“They want to cure the town of this ailment.” Freya glanced over to Kes, his jaw clenched tightly as he stared at her with wide eyes. She wished she could read his mind right now, was he mentally screaming at her for speaking too much or just filled with general anxiety?

“So Freya got lucky and was spared by kind travelers?” The elder known as Veron said, running his fingers through his graying beard. Things seemed to be going Freya's way, the hammering in her chest was slowly easing up.

But Mirable cleared her throat and stood up. “I'd like to remind the council that Freya lingered in the tavern after she was free.” Freya cursed under her breath, of course Mirable would rat her out!

“Is this true, Freya?” Uncle Eskel's voice cut through like a blade, ready to pierce her heart if she even utters the wrong words.

“I did,” She let out a heavy sigh. “I wanted to know more about the plague to see if I could learn anything that might help us.”

For a moment, the crowd seemed to approve of Freya's logic. That maybe the young borrower was only risking herself for the sake of her people, surely she shouldn't be punished so severely for thinking about the fate of her people, right? But Mirable only glared at Freya with dagger-like eyes. “Oh? If that's the case then explain why you attacked the one who tried to kill the Gith?”

Gasps dispersed around the room, Kes looked as though he might rip out his own dark hair. If the ground decided to open up below Freya's feet, she would gladly let herself be swallowed up to avoid this trial.

“Answer the question, Freya.” Uncle Eskel snapped.

“She was aiding in learning more about this plague.” It took everything in Freya to keep her voice from trembling. “I wanted to do my part in aiding them to that.”

“Borrowers are forbidden to aid larger beings no matter the reason!” Her uncle shouted. “You know this, yet you defied the very law that has kept our people safe!”

“Standing back and watching them die could only hurt our people!” Freya retorted.

“Father…” Kes cleared his throat, his hands shook more than Freya did. “Perhaps, Freya's intentions should be… considered over her nativity?”

“Silence Kan… Kestrel!” Uncle Eskel shot a piercing glare at his child. “All of Freya's actions will be judged!”

Nails dug into Freya's clenched fists, even ten years after Kes began his transition, Uncle Eskel's efforts to use his child's true name was lacking. Years of arguing with him wore him down enough to use the correct name to keep the house civil, yet they all knew uncle wasn't keen on the change. Anger boiling, Freya was ready to lash out at her uncle, but her eyes glanced over to her older cousin, who shook his head at her. She didn't need to read minds to know Kes was telling her not to start this now, and as much as she hated it, she knew he was right, the correction can wait until after she is given a penalty.

Petrona glanced over at uncle Eskel. “I hate to say it, but Kes has a point. If the travelers mean to seek aid for this plague then surely Freya should meet a less severe punishment?”

Loza, the other female elder scoffed. “Even if the large ones aid this town, we will not obtain such gratification.”

“That's not true!” Freya blurted out, all eyes fell on her now. Her throat threatened to close in an attempt to seal her true words from leaving her lips, but the searing glares from the elders kept her from freezing up. She had to speak up, to vouch for Tav and their companions. “I mean… their leader seemed keen on helping everyone affected by the plague. Perhaps, aid could even… reach us.”

The collective gasp wasn't at all surprising but it was disheartening, the quiet murmurs became full blown clamors, people spoke of theories of what the group did to Freya to make her say such a blasphemous thing.

“Are you suggesting that we reveal ourselves to those travelers just because a few of our own are ill?” Whitcomb bellowed out.

“Absolutely not!” Her breathing became more ragged, her mind racking for ideas that could win the colony over. “But maybe… I could… ask for the assistance myself.”

“No!” Kes shouted out, terror flickered in his eyes. His fear was reasonable, but Freya only gave him an apologetic look before continuing. “I heard they're going to investigate the cave south of here. If I go there, I could get the answers and hopefully, a cure for this plague. I would be the only borrower they interact with during the whole journey.”

“Have you gone mad, girl?! You're asking to befriend the very beings that have oppressed our people!” Fury was painted on uncle Eskels's face; there was no doubt he wanted to do nothing more than to scream at the top of his lungs for even hearing such a suggesting, but he maintained a professional decorum. “Have you forgotten the last time a borrower befriended a large one?” He asked in an eerily calm tone.

“Of course I haven't.” Freya's jaw clenched, how dare her uncle question her loyalty, she was not like the boy from thirteen years ago. The boy who befriended the larger being only to be betrayed and hunted down along with the rest of her colony for a quick profit. The very raid that took the lives of her parents, and the lives of Kes’ mother and younger brother. She wasn't stupid, she knew what larger beings were capable of, but if the fate of her colony rests in the hands of Tav, then she must do everything she can to make sure her people survive, even if such methods were… unconventional.

“I worry about Freya's alliance.” Mirable's cold voice silenced the crowd. “There was another questionable character amongst the travelers. The pale elf had a bounty on him, Huskin and his grunts wanted him, and the way he fought... He used more than blades to slaughter his enemies, he also tore into the neck of one of the cooks. I've only heard of vampires doing such a thing.” The scout studied Freya for a moment, she saw the guilt written on her. “I'm right, aren't I?”

She couldn't face anyone, not Mirable, not the elders, not even Kestrel. There was no good way to explain why Tav kept a vampire around, Freya couldn't even fully understand why. Her silence was all the confirmation the crowd needed.

“By the gods!” Uncle Eskel shouted. “You would have us put our trust in a group who lets a vampire roam free?!”

“One that walks in the sun too!” Veron added.

“Did he charm you?” Petrona gasped.

“Of course not!” Freya scrunched her nose. “The halfling is the one who leads the charge and he listens to them.”

“A vampire will always listen to their instincts.” Whitcomb warned. “And a colony of borrowers will satisfy their hunger for a bit.”

The panic in the crowd grew like a pot of water boiling over. Youngsters mentioned second hand stories about vampires, while the elderly feared they must uproot their lives and leave Skaars Hollow, and mothers cried out for the safety of their children. It was chaos that couldn't be contained.

“You have put our colony in danger with your recklessness!” Uncle Eskel shouted.

“Everything I have ever done was for the colony!” She snapped back.

“It was for your own selfish desire to seek out adventure, like your father!” Her uncle screamed out, his voice silenced the crowd, they watched in bated breath realizing this was no longer just a trial of a borrower who broke the rules, but a family affair being put on display. When Freya didn't retort back, uncle Eskel cleared his throat of all the rage he had pented up. “I have given you a pass due to it being the very thing that saved you from the raid, but now I see my leniency has put us at risk.”

Freya tensed up. “What are you saying?”

Uncle Eskel took a deep breath. “As of tonight, you are no longer welcome as a member of our colony. You will be escorted beyond the border where you will continue your exile alone.”

Yo-you can't do this!” Freya shrieked, her eyes locked onto her older cousin's, who shared the same look of fear as her. Neither of them should be surprised yet they were gutted by the verdict no less!

“Are we sure we should let her go freely,” Loza scowled. “Where she could always return with… unwanted guests.”

“I will not sentence the daughter of my sister to be executed.” While still stern, a glimpse of pity shone in his eyes. It was easier to pretend her uncle hated her, but deep down, Freya knew he had a soft spot for her just for looking like her mother.

“There must be another way, father!” Kes pleaded, tears pricked his eyes. “What if we forbade her from leaving the walls.”

“No!” Uncle Eskel bellowed. “She will continue to sneak out and cause trouble!” His cold glare fell onto his niece. “If you won't abide by the rules that kept your ancestors alive, then you can live on your own where your actions will only get yourself killed!”

“All I did was try to help!” There was no holding back tears anymore, she looked back to Kes, meeting his eyes one last time before Mirable pushed Freya along to send her out in the wilderness.

A/N: Hey, I just wanted to take a moment and say this was my first time writing transphobia in a story and while I took time to consult with people about the topic before hand, I will still admit that this is a topic that I wanted to tread carefully on. I didn't want to shoehorn the topic in but also not downplay the affects of misgendering/deadnaming. If anyone has more advice on how to write such a delicate topic. Let me know! Also Kes is trans-masc and would use he/they pronouns, I'm not quite sure how to write a character with multiple pronouns. So if anyone has any tips on that, feel free to let me know. Thank you for your support!

[hesitantvampirealien]

bye!

i hope this doesn't sound dramatic, it's just... something to make everyone aware of the situation and possibly the last time i'll have any transparency with you unfortunately

you're not gonna see my thoughts here anymore unless it's something really small and/or related to an interest of mine. It's only gonna be art, reblogging things i enjoy and other things that don't say anything about me, i don't want to talk about my thoughts again

This is my most active and also most viewed account, and even though at the beginning i had this as just some random blog i would post whatever i wanted at first and vent here to avoid self harm, since i would be taking my anger out on the keyboard instead of my wrists, right now this blog has been getting big enough to cause me problems - i still have no idea how my profile suddenly started catching attention of nazi blogs - and i'm just done with how much everything i do is taken like a personal threat and i'm treated like i'm some cartoon villain, it's not a new thing by any means, i've had this happen before, i got doxxed once a while back and threatened in my personal phone number, i've had pedants talk to me like i'm an inferior being, even my own step mother had a sick obsession for demonizing me at all costs for unknown reasons, i had all kinds of inconveniences. The real problem this time is that, in all honesty, i've just become tired and hurt. I'm aging. I'm just tired of everything being escalated in order to make it all about how much i'm being a bad person who's actively causing harm to people, like everything i said caused a massive butterfly effect that will wipe out entire populations

i would like to reintroduce myself and point out a few things.

You can call me Noodle, Poison or Gerard, i'm 20 years old, and i have a few disabilities that cause me to be unable to empathize and cause me to struggle to understand things like ethics, morals, seriousness, grief, etc. I come from a less than ideal background so most of the things i learned were pure violence and a lot of prejudice in many aspects, things that i'm still trying to unlearn. My request has always been there, to be kindly taught when fitting.

The truth is that the narrative of aspd simply being a condition that gets on people's way in some aspects is not as interesting as the one of a person with aspd being a cold blooded murdeous psychopathic maniac, someone who was born evil and fated to be a monster. People don't like to be told their view on that is wrong because they're taught to fear people like me, mainly by mainstream true crime content producers like TV channels that are filled to the brim of this stereotype and constantly repeating it

To any of my friends who are reading this, sadly you'll probably just have to stay worried forever about not knowing if i'm fine or not but if it makes you feel better, if i'm posting, then i'm probably alive. I'm just kidding, you can literally just dm me and ask me if i'm fine. I won't be, probably, since i'll bottle up my emotions all over again and probably start cutting my wrist all over again because i'll be bottling up again - journaling doesn't work for me, i feel worse when i "talk to myself" in a way so most of the times writing for myself is inefficient, i'm not sure why, i just know that when i write to myself i feel absolutely ridiculous and start feeling worse because i'm self conscious about the fact that i'm a lonely loser talking to myself - and the feeling of not belonging anywhere and not deserving anyone's affection whatsoever is amplified tenfold right now, in all honesty

so i apologize if anyone first thought of me as someone who refused to conform, since i'm conforming to the mainstream right now and shutting myself up and bottling everything up again and relearning aspd shame lolol

I was told tumblr was welcoming. I was wrong

[radnewspaperroom]

Solomon observation for lesson 11

I'm gonna do a read more in case some of you haven't yet, but make sure you block the different spoiler tags in your settings to avoid spoilers in the future, ok?

I find Solomon's whole interaction with Belphie to be mind boggling. Solomon has always been the kind to playfully act ignorant of jabs at him and blame for situations that he outright causes and brings about.

During S4, he helps Belphie and Satan with a prank that actually causes Lucifer to be bound to Solomon and Mephistopheles. But plays innocent at first.

Here we see him unashamed, correcting the blame and being willing to be public enemy number 1. A good mirror to Mammon's odd blame taking during the Cerberus excursion. Mammon is known for abandoning MC to his brothers wrath of him, and using them as a shield for balme (the custard) but he steps up and tells the truth about who got everyone to go to the castle

And, did anyone else get a little freaked out and think "we're about to see Solomon do something with his full chest? Like actually put forth a great deal of effort into fucking the boys up....if need be?"

We've never seen Solomon truly angry before. Peeved off maybe, but full on wrath/anger/rage? Not yet. Still haven't I don't believe. But he's made it Crystal clear he is feeling things that aren't just neutrality and mischievousness.

But I worry he's doing his regression arc. He's treating demons like ticking time bombs, which is fair on one hand. But he's removed himself in a way that kinda makes me think he's a hypocrite. Like he's better than them because he's not a demon.

He automatically assumes the worst about the lot, instead of just taking it out on Belphie for attacking MC. He claims they're ganging up on MC and takes offense to it.

He still sees them as "other" than himself, and always keeps how to deal with them specifically in mind. Always keeping them at arms length. Never fully allowing anyone to get close and Allow himself to be vulnerable.

And not just with the brothers, but with MC too.

How much do we (MCs) know about Solomon?

1. He can't grow old or die from sickness, but he is killable.

2. He's ancient. Far older than he claims he can remember.

3. He's had a pact with Barbatos for centuries.

4. He's a scientist/alchemist at heart. The sentence: "for science!" Was basically made for fuckers like him.

5. He claims ignorance to sarcasm, taking people's insults as compliments.

6. He can't cook and He accidentally even makes potions when cooking. (Swear I think it's cause he's immortal. He's 'for science'd his way into the kitchen and developed a fucked up sense of taste)

7. He's known 13 just a bit longer than Barbatos, or so it seems currently.

8. He's got a one track mind. Once he's got an experiment going, good luck getting his attention till he's done.

9. He's traveled through time before.

10. He likes to keep secrets. Even from MC about seemingly the most trivial things.

11. He sees demons as puppets and tools to be used, not really friends to be close with. He started to change that in the OG, but again, I'm worried this is regression era, where he's gonna slide back into old habbits.

I also worry it's a bit of jealousy making him act out. This is the most time since MC was stuck in the human world with no teleportation magic that he's gotten to spend with them.

He's gotten to live with them at Cocytus Hall, eat dinner every night with them. Go shopping. He's getting that newly wed experience the brothers have got since day 1.

Once the brothers accept MC as human, that'll come to a crash and burn. Simeon and Luke will go back to the celestial realm and MC's room will be open for them to go to (return to) and his honeymoon phase will be over as the newly infatuated brothers aren't gonna be keen on sharing their new love with him. It'll be just like present day

I said it in a different post, but Solomon has got issues, when it comes to having faith in someone other than himself.

He doesn't trust Asmo or Barbatos 100% cause they're demons, and he doesn't trust MC blindly yet, despite or perhaps because both of them are human.

He's constantly thinking about the next move, or 20 potential ones in any situation and calculating how to Speedrun the best outcome. And to be a scientist about it, he can't let feelings sway his ultimate decision.

He's got a staggering inability to just say "I trust you", take a backsest or to trust MC's judgement. He wouldn't be able to answer MC if they asked him to trust them over the grimmore thing.

If you choose the "I'll follow your lead" option before meeting Lucifer, he says this...

Solomon doesn't have faith in anyone but himself, and seeing MC's faith in him is enough to make him be vocal about it. Like he's honestly surprised his apprentice and romantic partner trusts him fully.

If there's something MC has buckets of: it's moxie and faith, and god damn if that ain't one hell of a combination.

[safetycar-restart]

So! You said about Charles when his mommy get sick and its been rolling around like tumbleweed in my head and then I saw gif sets of Pierre and it looks like he had his back/neck taped. Now, we know he has a spinal injury (had? I'm not entirely sure how these things work) but what if, post race, part of your ritual is to give Pierre his post race/post bath massage and bunny has always "helped" before by handing you the oil or holding Pierre's hand or whatever.

But after Baku, you're not there for whatever reason, and Pierre is very obviously uncomfortable and bunny cannot take his Pierre being in pain, so he spends as much time that weekend watching How To videos on YouTube and then calls you for advice and surprises Pierre with a massage before a nice long snuggle?

-🐼

I… I love this? We haven’t been speaking about poly!piarles nearly enough lately and this is perfect.

Firstly, the massage ritual? Amazing!!!

Pierre knows he could ask his trainer for a neck massage if it gets bad, and he does. But he just absolutely loves the massages you give him. Maybe it's something you do often? Not just after races and it's always so good.

It only gets better when Charles joins, because now Pierre has someone to hold his hand!! Bunny takes his job of holding his Pierre's hand very seriously. Maybe he's also in charge of wiping the excess oil off Pierre when you're done? He's so careful, making sure to treat his Pierre as best he can.

It's always so nice and soft when you do it? Charles insists on lighting some candles to set the mood, which is fine with you and Pierre because honestly it's nice and more importantly, it makes your bunny happy.

Pierre loves those massages so much. They're more than just a way to help his neck, they're a way to care for him? Pierre really struggles to express his needs sometimes, so to just be cared for and loved on like that by his two favourite people in the world is often exactly what he needs.

Which is why Charles decides to give himself a new mission when he sees his Pierre rubbing his neck after the first practice session of the weekend. Logically, Charles knows that Pierre would go to his trainer if his neck actually got bad, but that's not the same!!

He starts by watching YouTube tutorials, spends his entire lunch break watching them and stays up late that night watching them too. He even makes up an excuse about having a strategy meeting at the hotel his team is staying at that night to avoid spending the night with Pierre so that he can watch even more tutorials and make sure everything is perfect.

On Saturday night, he has a long FaceTime call with you, which definitely isnt out of the ordinary. But usually it's him and Pierre, so you're confused about why it's him.

Until he explains his plan to offer Pierre a massage on Sunday after the race. Maybe he even checks in with you if that's a good idea in the first place? Because as much as he really wants to help his Pierre, he trusts your judgement and if you say no, then he won't do it.

But of course you don't say no, and you offer him as many tips as possible to make it perfect.

Honestly he's so excited?

His race is terrible but he doesn't even care because he gets to head to the hotel with his Pierre and he's got the massage oil and spare towels in his bag and he's so ready!!

Pierre is confused when Charles offers, but then Charles explains that he watched a bunch of tutorials and got tips from you and bought his favourite massage oil.

I think the thought alone might make Pierre cry? He kinda just chokes up, mumbling 'bunny' and then pulling Charles into his arms for a long hug because Pierre has no idea how to process how much Charles did just to be able to offer him a massage after the race.

So obviously Pierre takes him up on the offer, and he's so good! He tries so hard and Pierre loves every second of it.

Then yeah, time for a long cuddle session!!

[venomroses]

Hi this is an ask inquiring about the fucked up details of the zones nothing is off the table I wanna know what u mean!!

hi!!

i guess what i want to see is how the bad parts of the zones affect killjoy culture/desert culture in general. like fucked up things on a larger scale i guess. i see a lot of easily-resolvable bad things (ex. someone gets hurt but then someone else patches them up, minor character death) or what's basically just violence for the sake of violence (everyones evil and kills and hurts other people in cold blood with no good reason, what i made the original post about). neither of these are inherently bad (though the latter usually isnt my cup of tea) and technically do acknowledge bad things in the zones but its on such a small scale. i wanna see worldbuilding!! bc theres so little canon content for danger days it makes it the perfect story to build up your own little world and i feel like people definitely build up the characters but don't build up the actual world as much. or maybe they do and i'm just not seeing it?

like one idea that i've been kinda toying with lately (that i hope is a good example) is the idea of medics usually being loners/in groups of other medics instead of each group having a medic or two because without proper medical care, something that might have an easy fix irl can be deadly or at least way worse in the desert, and because of that people fear getting sick. because medics are constantly around people who have potentially contagious diseases, people fear being around medics and try to avoid them if necessary to avoid getting sick. this is part of why being non-op if youre trans is so common- most people won't risk an operation if it isn't necessary to stop them immediately dying. this avoidance of medics is also part of why so many people in the zones are misinformed or just aren't informed at all about many illnesses- how are they going to learn if they won't get near the experts?

basically just worldbuilding my beloved <3

here's a bunch of ideas for potentially fucked up things beyond just killing murder violence and questions to prompt worldbuilding, if anyone's interested. under the cut bc this is long:

like i was talking about above, sickness. how do people generally act toward those who are sick? how much of a difference does the type of illness make in how the sick person is treated? does the way they're treated vary between different kinds of people (killjoys, neutrals, etc)? how do different groups go about curing sickness? how readily available is medical help or medicine? how good are the average desert dweller's first aid skills, and does it vary between groups?

hunger/thirst. what do different groups usually eat? where do they get their food and water from? do they get a balanced diet, or is it just whatever they can get their hands on? do they eat breakfast/lunch/dinner like we do or not? if not, how often do they eat? do they tend to have big meals or small meals? when there's not enough food for everyone, who gets to eat first? how do different groups feel about stealing from others to get what they need? are there certain groups that try to provide food and water for those in need, or is it everyone for themselves?

prejudice/discrimination. i know a lot of people hc the zones as being very accepting, but surely no place is perfect. are certain groups discriminated against in the city too, or is it specific to the zones? are they treated better in certain parts of the zones, or by certain groups? do they have their own spaces? are there any specific parts of desert culture that contribute to prejudice against certain groups?

capitalism. since most people agree the city is a capitalist hellscape and the zones seem to work somewhat similarly (people still having to buy things, a lot of people have written stories about killjoys trying to get enough money to buy things they need, etc) how do you earn money in the zones? if people have jobs, are workers paid well? what happens if you dont have enough money to get something you need? is trade/barter acceptable, or is it money only?

shelter. it gets pretty hot during the day and pretty cold at night, how many people have adequate shelter? will others take you in if you don't have shelter? do people stay in their shelter of choosing for extended periods of time, or do they move around a lot? how do people decorate their shelters, or make them more comfortable? what types of furniture or supplies are found in the average shelter?

violence. how often do people face violence in the zones? what reasons to people have to be violent to one another? does violence usually come from other zone dwellers, or does it happen between zone dwellers and better living industries? are violent incidents usually fatal or not?

childhood. how are children usually treated in the zones? how protected are they from the above problems? what lengths will people go to to help a child in need? what age is considered adulthood? do children lose the help and protections they once had (assuming they had any) once they're considered adults? is anyone willing to help those who've just reached adulthood?

obviously there's more things than that, but i think that's more than enough to get you started. lmk if you actually use any of these to do some worldbuilding, id love to see it!!

[sometimesraven]

So. London Pride.

I want to start off by saying I had an amazing time! It was great fun and the pros outweighed the cons by far. I enjoyed seeing how many kids and young people were not just there but actively protesting and participating, I loved the outpouring of support for trans people that the parade had, the vibes were excellent and I met a few lovely people through the night.

However.

I'm getting real fucking sick of cis gays acting like it's their parade and theirs alone. From lesbians actively shoving their way in front of me (a visibly nonbinary and disabled person), cis women hiding behind their "not ashamed of who i love" signage to avoid the parts of the LGBTQ+ community they didn't personally want to exist, to gay men yelling about how "trans people already have rights", it was MESSY.

There was a distinct vibe of entitlement from the cis monosexuals that really rubbed me the wrong way and it led in some cases to active transphobia and threats of violence. I've felt this vibe before (a few years ago, a trans woman in drag I was friends with had her drink spiked at Pride) but this year it was so tangible I felt actively unsafe in certain parts of the celebration.

Again, don't get me wrong, the overall vibe was positive! There were some lovely people who were very considerate (one person I met watching the parade asked me if I was doing okay, told me not to bend down to pick something up if I dropped it again because they would do it for me, just all around lovely), but I'm really really getting sick of the entitlement of cis gays and lesbians (especially cis white gay men) at these events and I'm not the only one (had a lovely discussion in a sex shop of all places about how entitled they can be, with the pansexual black woman behind the counter and I quote "I want to turn up and support my cis gay brothers but they're making it real hard.")

Idk. It'll be interesting to see how different the vibe is at Trans Pride next week but there's definitely this kind of insidious vibe of cis gays forgetting what Pride is about and treating it like a great big party specifically for them rather than a protest for inclusion. It's one thing seeing all the christian anti-gay protesters who were there, you kind of expect them at some point, but where entitlement and -phobia is concerned, the call is coming from inside the house and it's getting scary af.

[warriorprincesstramp]

ok basically yesterday fucking sucked I saw two of my friends again and this one guy who irritates the hell out of me but I'll talk about that later. first one was chill we're going to a concert anyway and they messaged me like two weeks ago to see if I was ok they're cool I KNOW they like me and want to see me more even when I'm avoidant so like that's Safe. and then the other... text message guy. the WEIRDO. gave me nothing total poker face just acted normal. like ok fine we'll just ignore that weird ass message you STILL haven't explained. sure. and he AND the first friend both did that ohhhh it's so crazy you came I can't believe it it's a miracle joke. like ok it's not a big deal but it's giving dad voice look who just decided to grace us with their presence... and then text message guy left right after the lecture to comfort his fwb-turned-friend who he almost got pregnant because he's an idiot. sorry that's not relevant I'm pissed at him rn like omggg just come up with an explanation i don't even care if it fake as fuck just don't act like the LAST thing you said to me for three weeks was the most cryptic shit ever. also I meant to post ages ago that sometimes he's nice and sometimes he gives the most awful vibes like I do not like the way he treats the women he dates/hooks up with at all. anyway. third guy I realised we had the same fucking 6pm seminar so I had to hang out with him for two hours and it sucked I do not like him and he's trying sooooo hard to weasel into our little group. get out! seinfeld voice I already have three friends I can't make room for any more... he's just insufferably smug and pretentious and I don't know if he's private school but he feels like it. I don't HATE him he's FINE I wouldn't care about making occasional small talk but he's popping up everywhere and I do not want to be friends I'm sorry. we are just not compatible at all. and I'm tired of befriending MEN. to be honest. I used to be friends with all women now I'm friends with all men and non-binary people which is fine but the way men act is just exhausting honestly and of course there's the Danger (cough cough text message guy). and furthermore. where are my fucking dykes. I'm SICK OF IT! and my third friend who I was sure I'd see was hungover so no dice but they're always chill we're on the same wavelength so once we get past the fucking "ohhh isn't it's so crazy that you're here" shit it'll be cool. anyway I feel like I've come off like an asshole in this post but it needed to be said ok... xoxo tee

[llycaons]

ep14 (pt1): oh boy romantic montage time

wwx as a teenager is genuinely more compassionate than he's portrayed as

aw shit mention of the oath

I've often been confused by this sequence. if they showed wwx actually entering the shell instead of suddenly cutting to him inside this big red cavern, I think it would have made more sense

also I've often complained that animals don't have large rooms in their bodies like that but I just realized....oh yeah it's an ancient twisted monster. animal biology need not apply so 🤡

honestly I found this fight scene very drawn-out and uninteresting. the special effects for the fight were somewhat awkward and I was kind of bored. this was good though

wyb does 'devastated' very well

I'm kind of missing the donhua ngl. I like cql the best but the donghua was just so focused and clever and creative with the story

wwx is all kinds of fucked up after this fight....not just from his concerning readiness to die but probably also from connecting with this cursed fucking sword. he seems really out of it, and seems to be in a drowsy sort of honesty when he's like 'oh lan zhan...I didn't think I'd be able to meet you again' which is a very...nitimate thing to say? bc later when lwj gives him spiritual energy and he's a little more himself

he sees lwj all lit up and helping him and he starts complaining about how 'boring' it is. face your feelings, wwx! stop avoiding them! you think lwj is beautiful and unique and special and you like him a lot!

it's also. I feel like wwx doesn't feel like he even has the right to have an attachment outside of the jiangs? in some scenes he's really enthusiastic about himself and lwj being partners but in others he hastily denies it in order to smooth things over with jc, so jc doesn't feel abandoned. oof. we'll get to that

okay the top one is the viki and the bottom one is the youtube version which I remember! why are the translations the opposite of each other! also the youtube version is literally higher quality im so mad

god damn I love the lyrics to wuji. they almost don't matter, since they never come up after this and they're not relevant to the song's significance within the narrative, but they're perfect. it's about the struggles of a lifetime, about grief and joy, the ups and downs of being in the world, of reputation lost and gained. vague and poetic, and achingly relevant. that last line about sharing a tune together at the horizon....that's the finale, isn't it? just beautifully put together and a powerful reflection of the story itself, wwx's rise and fall and the pains and joys he's going to face. cannot believe a 16 yr old wrote that. tho if it was anyone, it would be lwj wouldn't it

lwj is ALWAYS the one leaving without saying goodbye! no wonder wwx lost faith! in this context the gusu situation is a little urgent but like. he couldn't have left a note?

I've read a few fics where they sleep together in the cave and 1. nasty and 2. that would make him just leaving after so much worse 😭 I do not endorse the first time cave sex headcanon. I still don't think it would realistically happen until ep 43. too early here, and after sunshot wwx is terrified of anyone touching him because they'll be able to tell he's lost his core. so as fun as angsty sunshot hookups are, I simply cannot see it. tho that would technically also be a factor in ep43, I don't think wwx cares as much by then if lwj knows

aw shit good job jzx

jc is yelling at wwx AGAIN and complaining about not being recognized for his efforts. my dude he just woke up from a week-long fevered sleep chill out. also can jzx stop crowding him? it's like these idiots have no idea how to treat sick people ALSO. why did jc have to run for help? they had a ton of people there. couldn't they have removed the boulders themselves? huh, maybe the wens were hanging around and all they could do was flee

wwx and ljw have such main character energy that wen chao KNEW they stayed behind to kill the false xuanwu...okay

the shidis are learning archery and jyl is just...standing there. okay! couldn't have had her like, reading or doing crafts. nope. just standing there. probably looking out for her returning brothers but like. come on

I really love that jfm personally goes to teach the little disciples. he's gentle and encouraging, and provides a reassuring and secure presence, and I'm sure his students love him. despite his flaws I'm very fond of him esp here

oh wwx, fainting again. first of many

this detail is legit so freaking cute. and wwx's warm smile upon seeing it and knowing he's home 🥰 this supports my 'wwx is a hopeless romantic' agenda. I did laugh when the donghua gave one of them huge boobs but the wx subtext in that show was so potent I can't really accuse them of straightwashing. more evidence for him being bi is all

good for you, jc

see, here he's trying to make jc feel better by calling lwj boring and jc just - lashes out. wwx tries this entire scene to deflect praise onto jc and diminish his accomplishments and to support jc and jc just treats him like shit. no wonder their relationship is so terrible later if jc treats him like this just bc he's mad. can't he see that wwx has no more control over this situation than jc does? he's just the acceptable target in jc's eyes bc jc can't be mad at his parents!

like wen chao was trying to murder mm and string up her body to attract the monster which they were going to be expected to fight without weapons. what the fuck was he supposed to do? and he's not even the one who started the fight! AND if he hadn't stayed behind, how could everyone else has escaped? I didn't see jc offering any other solutions! jesus

it sucks that jfm is implying that jc doesn't have the right temperament to lead the clan, but he's literally the only person in authority to push back against jc's treatment of wwx this arc. and he's literally right that you shouldn't speak from anger. it's not what a leader should do, it's not fair or just, it doesn't allow you to speak wisely or carefully, and it's not something that will lead anywhere good. but after this arc all jc does is lead from anger and bitterness!

it's also so twisted that wwx feels responsible for this and tries to defend jc as 'he's just mad and venting' which he says is fine here but later in the story he bitterly complains about. like I know he loves and misses LP as an adult but this entire situation was absolutely noxious for everyone involved. ppl talk about jyl being parentified but wwx felt obligated to do the same for jc as well and put aside all his own needs and emotions for jc's as soon as this shit starts up. he acts like the undeserving servant as soon as he feels like he needs to I feel dizzy

[thatsneakymedic]

October Writing Challenge

Day 5 Teeth

Despite that Kabuto was Orochimaru's right hand man and spy for him. Every now and then when he feels like it, he would take on a few patients to treat before he heads back out again.

For others, they get uneasy when they discover that Kabuto is their doctor for the day, especially the disrespectful and stubborn patients who can't lie their way around him. Kabuto makes sure to keep a note on the more troublesome patients so that they can be used for "something" else if their health is the avoidable kind.

Not only was he healing those who need it to keep them loyal to Lord Orochimaru, but also healing people with various injuries, sicknesses, chronic illnesses, or even incurable ones are always something that keeps Kabuto's calculating mind fresh and learning something challenging and new. As cruel as it is, Kabuto did love to see new kinds of injuries and illnesses that is brought to his table.

While rearranging the files to the correct dates since the people he left responsible keep messing up the order, he is called over to the trauma recover room where the most injured shinobi are brought to him. According to the head nurse, she told him about how someone in a spar smacked the guy on the mouth with a kanabo, and while he defended himself from it resulting in a fractured arm, his upper mouth however has been damaged along with the gum line and his teeth have not only been destroyed but they're now scattered and lost in the training field. The photos provided to him were much more traumatic and worst than he thought.

His eyebrow raised at the description of the trauma, this... is new and perhaps something that he is curious to see since depending on the damage, it could take either multiple surgeries or just one to be fixed. Either way, this man must be in serious pain as soon as the meds wear off.

"I'll handle it, which medical room is he in?" Kabuto takes the folder and he follows the nurse to the room where the heavily sedated man was resting. His arm was in a sling, which was treatable despite it being broken, but what stood out is his bandaged bloodied mouth that the only thing that was keeping him breathing was the breathing pipe connected to the machines.

"Has he eaten anything yet?" Kabuto asked as he leans down and examines his other features, including his eyes. The nurse shakes her head, "No, he hasn't. Fortunately he didn't eat before training, Kabuto-sama. Are you going to prep this one for surgery right now? Can this man handle another surgery at his state since we just stopped the bleeding."

Kabuto pulls away and his adjusts his glasses with a nod, "Perfect, prep him up and get him ready tomorrow. I'm going to bring my at least 3 other assistants and the nearest town's oral surgeon. Because he lost so much blood from it, also prepare some blood packs as well."

24 hours later...

"Is everyone ready? No bathroom trips?" Kabuto asked in a light tone as he prepares to wear his while scrub as well as his gloves and hair net. "Ready, Lord Kabuto." "Yes, Lord Kabuto." The two nurses replied to him while the third one nods silently. The oral surgeon is already there and just waiting patiently for the four to step into the room.

"Everyone's here. Alright. Now the reveal..." He and the others step into the room and as they surround the unconscious man, Kabuto is the first to carefully remove the bandages from the man's face.

"Let's get started then. Prepare for the skin grafting after we fix up his jaw and put the new replacement teeth on it..."

(Warning, real messed up gore under the readmore. It's not a real injury, it's an image from an unsettling movie called "Rabid" 2019 Look at your own risk. For reals. )

@lunyraartistry (from the October Writing Challenge)