#but i'd still do anything just to hear from her

[cultural-marxism-official]

The veil jumpers were founded by the Dalish.

Dalish are very protective of what remains of their culture…because nearly everything has been taken from them. Their history, culture, their land, their flesh and blood. They are mistrustful of outsiders for very good reasons. Especially in arlathan as the forest is within the tevinter empire. It makes no sense that they should readily welcome anyone to explore their ancient historical sites, deeply sacred to them, when anyone could very easily be a tevinter agent and honestly, it should be crawling with them wanting to get their hands on whatever is causing this magical friction, as its very powerful and tevinter covets magic and the fucking hate elves.

There are centuries of cruelty and ethnic cleansing between the dalish and tevinter, still actively ongoing(see: the invisible slaves that the writers did not want to address). If this was a well written game(its not) it would be a very hard pill to swallow regardless, but in light of everything else in veilguard, I highly doubt I "missed the context" when I literally just played through that intro again before writing that post, just to be sure I wasn't going crazy. Sure we say we were sent by the veil jumpers, but Bellara should ask for some proof we didn't just finish murking their hideout and are now looking for the stragglers, something tevinter would 100% do.

And also the magic bubble thing you mentioned; we meet Bellara outside of the bubble and then enter it together(also insane that we take that risk with no hesitation, completely ridiculous, sure varric says shes good but we just throw our lives in her hands with no worry). So there's no imperative of just believing rook and their companion to survive. If anything, that highlights what could have been a much more interesting introduction of rook wandering into the bubble containing bellara, her being rightfully mistrustful but after your help getting through the ordeal, decides to trust you. Alas.

No my friend, it's just really shallow writing, the writers do not care to inhabit the world with the characters theyre writing. That's why we see no slavery in the slave capital, that's why there is no cultural conflict between anyone or any allied faction, that's why the crows were completely white washed of all previous wrongdoings, that's why the maker and andraste are hardly ever mentioned or uttered and we never even hear a word of the black divine even though most humans are andrastian. I really could go on with how shallow everything feels.

I hadn't even really gotten back into DA for a few years, I'd been meaning to but I love this world and story so much, it's richness and atmosphere never really leaves me, I hardly had to refresh my memory for much of the lore, that's how good an impression previous games left. And how utterly pitiful the writing in veilguard is in comparison.

a really cool part about dragon age veilguard is the first scene where you meet bellara, especially if you're a shadowdragon mage and you have neve with you

so to set the scene: bellara, the dalish elf who's devoted her life to the conservation, discovery and protection of her people's lost and ancient history, meets two strangers, two tevinter mages, in sacred arlathan. They tell her, hey your gods are back in the world but also they suck and we gotta kill them, and instead of telling them "fuck off you vile enslaving shem, you defile this land with your presence" like most normal dalish, not only does she instantly believe them that her gods are bad for some reason, they're back among the people and need to be stopped, she also happily starts telling them all kinds of secrets and valuable knowledge about ancient elven magic and is even so kind to, without question, take them on a grand tour of this very historically important and sacred ruin in arlathan to find a truly priceless artifact, a one of a kind archive of ancient elven knowledge thought lost forever, because really, what could these unknown tevinter mages possible want with that!

...

are these writers smoking crack?? is that it? theyre smoking crack??

[starfruit-selections]

TW: CNC, unsafe self bondage

Blindfold? Check. Shears? Check. Ankles? Tight. Wrists? About to be. With that, I pull on the rope in my hand and tighten the hogtie I've put myself in. I'm on the floor in my room, naked except for a rope harness on my torso, and the other ropes binding my body. Pulling again, the hogite gets tighter as my legs are pulled up and back, towards my arms. One more good yank, and it's plenty tight.

Actually maybe too tight? The rope is pulling hard on my ankles and wrists now, too hard. Fuck. I struggle a bit, but it's not long before my fingers start feeling cold. This is bad.

I roll over and try to reach for my shears. Normally I would just struggle out of a tie like this, but the rope around my wrists has been cinched way too tight for that. I need to cut myself out, and fast.

I continue rolling around on the floor, feeling around with quickly numbing hands for the shears that I have specifically for situations like this, but I can't for the life of me find them. I swear I had left them right beside me! I should've rolled over them by now! Fuck fuck fuck.

My hands are feeling tingly now, and I'm starting to lose feeling. Even if I do manage to find my shears at this point, I doubt I'd be able to use them. This is really fucking bad. What can I do?

Call for help? My roommate is just in the living room, they'd definitely be able to hear me. But then they'd see me like this, naked and tied up in the floor. This is only my 2nd week in this apartment, my 2nd week knowing this person, and they'd be seeing me at my most vulnerable. I don't know if I'd be able to live that down. Fuck it, it's better than losing my hands.

"Elle!" I call out, still rolling around, still prodding the floor with my quickly numbing hands in a desperate attempt to find the shears. "Elllle!"

"I'm coming I'm coming, jeez. What's all the fuss abo- Oh." she cuts off as I hear my door opening. For a moment, I'm thankful that the blindfold is preventing me from seeing her reaction. "Well now isn't this something…"

I don't want to hear what she's about to say. "Please, the rope on my wrists is too tight, I'm losing feeling, there are shears around here somewhere, cut me out, please!"

"Well alright sweetie, I guess I can do that, lets see now… Ah! Here are the shears." Something's off about her tone as she walks past me, presumably to pick up the shears. That doesn't matter right now though, I just need out.

"Please, cut me out quick! I'm going numb!" I yell louder than I need to, seeing as how she's right next to me. It's more of a plea than anything.

"Calm your tits and hold still so I don't cut you, little rope bunny." Again the tone, and did she call me a rope bunny? Whatever, she's cutting me out, that's all that matters right now.

I hear her kneel down and get right up next to me, although she seems to take her sweet time doing it. She grabs my arms tight, I guess to keep me still? I am struggling quite a bit. "Alright, lets free those pretty little wrists free, shall we?" I feel the cold metal of the shears press against my skin, as she cuts through the bindings on my wrists. Finally, I can feel the blood flowing back in to my hands. I'm gonna be fine.

"Fuck, thank you, I really thought I was going to-" before I can finish, I feel a new length of rope wrapping around my wrists and being pulled tight. "Wait what the hell are you doing?" I yell, and try to struggle away. She has a solid grip on my arms though, and I can't put up much of a fight with how tired my arms are. Before long my wrists are once again bound, though not nearly as tight.

"Don't you worry your pretty little head, slut" Elle says, keeping a solid grip on my arms and pulling me up on to my feet. The rope attaching my wrists to my ankles is gone, but my ankles remained tied together tightly. "Obviously you love being tied up…" Elle continues, ignoring my protests. "And I would hate to take that away from you so soon, but you clearly can't be trusted to tie yourself up properly. Luckily, you seem to have left plenty of rope lying around for me to help you out with! Still, I wouldn't want to leave you un-supervised, so you can come out to the living room with me and have your fun in there." What the fuck does she think she's doing?

"No! Elle, just let me go and untie me, I'm done for tonight, really!" I plead with her, still struggling against her grip. Fuck she's strong.

"Nonsense! Now, why don't you quite down a little, hm?" Before I can protest, she shoves something into my mouth so that I can't speak. Judging by the material and the taste, I can tell it's my pantied from earlier that I had left lying on the floor. Then I feel a piece of rope wrap around my head in front of my mouth before being pulled tight, preventing me from spitting out the gag.

"Much better! Now, to the living room we go." With that, she picks me up and throws me over her shoulder. Despite my depserate struggling, her hold on me remains tight as I'm carried out into the living room and placed down in my stomach, not nearly as gently as I would've liked. Once I'm on the ground, I immediately feel my arms and legs get yanked together by a new rope. Elle must have some experience with rope herself, as before I know it I'm tied up in a new hogtie.

I once again try to protest, but only muffled grunts are able to make it through the gag. I finally feel her let go of my arms, but it doesn't matter at this point. This tie is much better than the one I had done to myself, and even as I struggle, it doesn't loosen at all.

"There you go, tied up nice and tight, but properly this time. Huh, seems you left a wet spot on my shoulder when I carried you out here, what a slut. Don't worry, I'll make sure you get a chance to make it up to me later. I've been eyeing that pretty mouth of yours ever since you moved in, and I'm sure it'd feel great around my cock. I have a movie to finish though, so I'll let you have your fun for now. Just pretend that I'm not here!"

And with that, the TV starts playing, and I'm left on the floor, entirely at the mercy of my roommate. I continue to struggle for a while, but it's not long before I give up. At least I can feel my hands again, I guess. I have a feeling this is going to be a long night though…

[sturnina]

🕷 — "fuck the feds"

Spiderman!Chris x Delinquent!reader AU Part two to Spray Cans and Web Shooters

— summary;; Chris regrets overreacting (that's legit it, I'd planned a lot more but it just doesn't work, and I need to post this now since I'm referencing it in the next oneshot lol)

— wc;; 744

— trigger warning;; none! (yet)

— author‘s note;; IMPORTANT!! I'm making this a blurb / oneshot collection. Most of the parts can be read individually, except when a specific part one is linked at the top :)

Chris knows the web fluid will dissolve in not even an hour, and get weak enough to be removed in about half an hour. But what he did was stupid, so stupid. What if the police decide to go check the building just that minute? Or what if literally anyone else arrives while she’s there stuck to the wall?

Guilt is nagging at him from the insides, making his stomach twist while he lands on a transmission tower. God, he can‘t do anything right today, can he? Especially after his brothers were especially rude and annoying all day, he was so excited for some alone time.

But before he can decide to turn around or run away, a motorbike nears the railway station. He drops a little lower on the tower, hiding between the cables, and watching the biker stop a bit further away than the girl’s bike is, hiding the motorbike from anyone travelling the road.

From here, Chris can barely see the biker‘s silhouette as they walk over to the fence, a small bag slung over their shoulder, and dive through the hole in the fence, entering the area of the station. It isn‘t recognisable whether it‘s a guy or a girl, but Chris follows them anyway, swinging back to the roof of the station.

The second the other person enters, he hears talking, which calms him down. Well — to be quite honest, he maybe wished he could save the girl inside. Just a bit. To make up for sticking her arm to the wall. He hates the thought that she might dislike him now.

Knowing that she‘s safe, there‘s nothing left to do for him, except for driving himself mad by overthinking everything and everyone. What is wrong with him?

Chris returns to the railway station the next evening—this time, after finishing his patrol, in the middle of the night. His first thoughts when he looks inside are, Well. At least the girl wasn’t too traumatised after yesterday.

How does he know?

There is a huge new graffiti on the wall, painted in red, black and white. His Spiderman mask, with a sentence in fat lettering across it. “fuck the feds,” it says, and, despite the meaning, Chris has to admit, it doesn’t look all that bad. Pretty good, actually. The web pattern on the mask is accurate, and the letters are woven into it, but the elements don’t blur, even though it’s all just red, black and white. It looks trippy, almost.

He admires it for a while before remembering that he should be offended. But on the other hand, he deserves it.

“Turned out pretty accurate, didn’t it?” a voice behind him asks. Chris turns around, still hanging on the thread. He isn’t startled, his spider sense having warned him way before he heard the girl.

“It’s pretty fire,” he admits.

She’s wearing the piece of fabric again, just about covering her lower face. The rest of her clothes are casual. Unrecognisable.

“What’s up with the mask?” he asks, elegantly dropping to the ground. Her eyebrow quirks up, and she crosses her arms in front of the black hoodie.

“You cover up your face too,” she points out the obvious, “am I not allowed to?”

“Fair enough.” Not wanting to stand around awkwardly, he uses his webs to swing over to the wall, until he’s walking on it as if it were the floor. “You did this?”

“With help,” the girl admits, “but yeah. Was my idea.”

“I wonder where you got it from,” he hums, crouching down on the wall and running a finger over the dry paint.

“I don’t know, totally not because I spent an hour taped to the wall because of the city’s hero.” The way you say it sounds like you’re putting it in quotes. Chris sighs at that.

“Yep. Sorry ‘bout that. I had a bad day.”

“That’s the explanation? You know, fun fact, chaining people to a wall and forcing them to stand up for days was a torture method in the Middle Ages.”

He raises his upper body, leaning against the wall. “Okay, I get it. But I’m not a Federal, so the text is wrong.”

“Oh yeah, I‘m sorry,” the girl says sourly, brows furrowing. “The independent hero who always does what he thinks is right. A bit stereotypical, dont’cha think?”

Chris sighs. He’s getting nowhere like this, the girl is too stubborn. Why does he even care about making things right with her?

— tags;; @fallininlust @bluestriips @wh0remikasas @ilusa @izzylovesthetriplets (tell me if you want to be tagged <3)

[teaguehq]

No, I get that because it's hard to reach out about these things sometimes! Though I feel like I've gotten better about that as I've gotten older, too. Which is a good reminder too, that the people who love us aren't bothered by us needing extra support. Of course, and we can't have enough support from people who understand that headspace, so why not help each other, right? And friends help each other! I can imagine, Jo's a hugely popular character, and so is that film! You played her beautifully. I appreciate the kudos, and he was certainly an interesting character to play for sure, though at least now I know better not to live in that headspace for filming rather than balancing it with other things, because my headspace was so messy because of him, and that lasted a while. I don't regret anything though when I'm happy for the way the show turned out. That makes me laugh so much though, because who'd forget Ireland is an island?! That's a bit like people being shocked I lived around beaches since I grew up in Florida. And I try to head back to Florida when possible since my parents still live there, and they'd protest if I stayed away too long! Please do tell me the best places since we can't have too many vacation places up our sleeves, especially between projects to unwind some. Thankfully my boyfriend's more kind than that, though he'd definitely be amused if that were happening and I were still walking and acting like an ape, which I couldn't blame him for! Everything about that was so much fun, just being on a playground every day where we acted like apes. I feel like my kid self would be so proud I got to do something like that. Are your parents good about not talking about your projects though? I always want to tell mine details about my projects too, but if I've been threatened on secrecy, I don't tend to tell them as much for being paranoid they may let something slip to a friend or the like. Though I'll tell my boyfriend since he's in the business and knows it's important not to say anything. I will, and I'd love to hear all about Bad Apples then! Well, I'm currently on set in Calgary, though I wouldn't make anyone show up with a cheerleading outfit given this weather right now! | @saoirseur

it really is rough -- and honestly, i'm someone that doesn't like to bring others down, so i'll internalize everything, which i know isn't at all healthy! and you're very right about that, when you're in that darker headspace, it's easy to think the worst and just assume you'll be a bother, even though deep down you're not. not a single person that cares about you would feel that way. which is sweet of you to say, and you know i'd offer up the same to you as well. i like the idea of us looking out for each other on that front, we'll be good friends for that! right?  like when i got cast as jo, i was over the moon -- and thank you for saying you loved my jo, that means a lot. i'll admit that i've watched some films and have always wondered what it would be like to go that dark, but i still couldn't imagine myself doing that, you know? so i'm giving you all the kudos for playing harold and having to dive into his character like you did. and i can only imagine how easy it is to fall into that sort of headspace! i am pretty lucky, and it makes me laugh when i tell people i live on the beach in ireland and they're shocked, like they've forgotten that ireland is an island. i can imagine missing gorgeous beaches while you're in new york, do you get to go back to where you grew up a lot to visit beaches there at least? please, if you ever want to come to ireland for a vacation, let me know and i'll tell you the best places to stay! i'm glad you're doing well being a human, though i would laugh if your boyfriend wasn't telling you that you were walking like an ape randomly. however, i feel like he'd probably be a good boyfriend that would give you a heads up! i can just imagine how much fun playing with those ape arms was, though -- and working with them, of course! it really is, and my parents are who i always want to blab to first when i start a new project. and in my head, i'm like, they're not in the industry, who they going to tell? but yes, as soon as you can tell me anything about your new projects, please share them with me! though i can finally talk about my project, bad apples, that i've just finished filming! and thank you, i figured i needed the best outfit to be your cheerleader, so next time you're on a set, let me know and i'll show up. || @teaguehq

[cryingatwindermerepeaks]

Little!Rio x Cg!Agatha - Nightmares

Requested by anon: would you be willing to write a little!rio and cglagatha one shot about Rio waking from a nightmare? Maybe Agatha's up working, so Rio gets out of bed to find her, and Agatha takes her back to bed and soothes her. Basically something fluffy+super cuddly! If you'd rather do Agatha x reader I'd be equally happy with that too :)

Word count: 712

——————————

Rio woke up with her heart thundering and her chest heaving. Her Mama was gone. She’d left in the dream too, disappearing into some dark, foreign forest and leaving Rio alone with all the monsters. Rio knew this wasn’t real, it wasn’t real… But her Mama wasn’t here either. The lines between reality were blurring in her mind and Rio just wanted her Mama to come back. She sniffled sadly, rubbing harshly at her cheeks. She felt small, scared and alone. Rio reached across the cold, empty bed for her pacifier which had fallen out in her sleep. Memories of Agatha giving it to her only a few hours ago brought fresh tears to Rio’s eyes. She pushed her paci into her mouth, sucking to silence the tears. It worked almost immediately but did little to soothe the ache in her chest. Rio was scared, she couldn’t do anything by herself. She couldn’t pour her own bottles, or stitch up her stuffies if they broke, or make mac n’ cheese for dinner. Only Mama could do that… and now Mama was gone. Rio tried to be a big girl, cuddling her stuffed bunny tightly to her chest and scrunching her eyes closed. But the room was so dark and she could hear monsters outside of the window getting louder and she just wanted Mama.

Nervously the little slipped out of the bed, her sock clad feet landing gently on the hardwood floor. Rio shivered and gripped her stuffie in her fist, it was cold and dark and she didn’t really want to leave the relative safety of her bed. Agatha couldn’t have gotten that far, surely, she had to still be nearby, Rio promised herself. She poked her head out of the bedroom and glanced down the hallway. Sure enough, there was a soft glow of light emanating from Agatha’s office. Quickly, Rio padded down the hallway, much more confident now that she knew her Mama had not actually gone anywhere too far. She flung the door open and Agatha looked up from the case files she’d been working on with a fright.

“Rio, bubba, what are you doing up?” She tutted disapprovingly before noticing the red, tear induced rings around Rio’s wide eyes.

“Mama left,” Rio pouted around her pacifier. She crossed the room with her arms outstretched for Agatha. Agatha’s face fell, pushing out her desk chair and letting Rio clamber up onto her lap.

“Mama just had to get some work finished, little bug,” She cooed, gently brushing Rio’s wild, bed tangled hair away from her face. Rio sniffled, pressing her head to Agatha’s chest. She sniffled shakily, exhaustion hitting her now she knew she was safe. Agatha gently slipped her cool hand up the back of Rio’s pyjama shirt and rubbed soothing circles to calm her baby. “Mamas right here, I’m not going to leave you,” She promised, bouncing her knee gently to calm Rio whose face was again stricken by tears. Agatha gently lifted the ear of Rio’s bunny which she was holding tucked into her chest. She traced the soft fabric of the ear across Rio’s raw cheeks. “Senor Scratchy doesn’t want you crying bubba.” Rio sniffled, rubbing her face against Agatha’s shoulder.

“Was scared,” She mumbled.

“Oh I know, I’m sure you were,” Agatha cooed. “But you’re so brave hm, you came and found Mama which was so brave.” Rio nodded, using the hand which wasn’t holding her bunny to hold onto a fistful of Agatha’s loose, soft pyjama shirt. “Mama is never going to leave you, ever, ok? You don’t have to be scared.” Agatha promised. “Let’s get you back to bed bug, it’s too late for babies to be up.”

Rio obediently slipped off Agatha's lap. “Too late for Mamas too?” Agatha nodded, closing her laptop before taking Rio’s hand. “Too late for Mamas too, let's get to bed.”

Agatha helped tuck Rio back into bed with her stuffie before climbing in next to her. “You don’t need anything else, bug? A bottle or a change?” Agatha offered gently, pulling Rio into her arms.

“Nuh, ‘m ok mama,” Rio hummed with a yawn. It was true, now she had her mama everything else felt ok. Agatha smiled softly.

“Alright then, goodnight my love.”

[yeonmuse]

MINI SERIES | YANG JUNGWON

CAN YOU HEAR MY HEART?

𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 : Jungwon falls for an antisocial girl with a passion for music and a love for the stars.

GENRE, fluff, slow burn , smau

( 𝐁𝐚��’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬 ) : I honestly have no idea where this came from I just thought of anti social Jungwon and Anti social reader coming together and this is where it got me

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𝐒𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 @jwonistic @jiamini @sol3chu @vixialuvs

The final score

Today was the final day which Jungwon and yn would spend together working on the project together. Needless to say he wasn’t sure what would happen after this, yes the two of them had become closer but he had his doubts. Would she still want to hang out with him after tonight? He sat silently tapping his pencil against the table as the ticking of the clock continued to wind. His nerves screaming at him to for once go against his thoughts and go for what he clearly wanted.

His thoughts were interrupted as yn slipped into the room like always, she held two drinks in her hand just like the last night they worked with one another.

“It’s so cold out.” She places the drinks on the table before taking off her coat, Jungwon realized it almost immediately and he hated that he did, but she was avoiding his gaze.

“So I already recorded the tracks. Should we start by working on their placements?”

“Look at me yn.”

“Huh? What do you mean?” He caught her, she couldn’t look at him, not after last night. It would only make things worse for her, it would only solidify the way she felt for him after last night.

“You haven’t looked at me once since you came inside yn, please.” His pleading made her heart hurt her chest, she sensed a hint of hurt in his voice but she couldn’t get herself to face him. So without a second thought Jungwon took it upon himself to turn her head and make her look at him.

“Better.” Her breath caught in her throat as she was forced to now face him, unlike her he didn’t shy away from her gaze, he stared directly into her eyes.

“Um, so the soundtrack.” She clears her throat before returning her attention back to the task at hand. She remained like that with him for the rest of the night. Stealing glances at him or chasing the subject when he talked about anything other than the project at hand, they worked at it for hours until they had perfected it. Then there was nothing more to discuss once the final adjustments had been made.

“Why do I feel like you’re trying to push further and further from me no matter how much closer you try to get?” The question caught her off guard, but it wasn’t like it was something she could avoid.

“What do you mean..?”

“The entire time since the day we met we've been trying to get closer to you, Sunoo became friends with you faster than I ever could, you grew accustomed to the others in just an hour..but with me..”

“Jungwon..”

“What about me is different from them?”

“You make me feel how the stars used to make me feel..” It was clear by Jungwons expression that he was completely confused.

“When I was younger, I fell in love with stargazing. It was calming on nights where all I could do was overthink or bombard myself with useless thoughts. It became an ongoing thing, listening to music and writing beneath the stars and I felt, I felt happy..like I wasn’t alone. I could look at them and hope for things I'd never hope for on a normal day, but at some point the sky became void of them.” Jungwon had no idea where she was going with this, but everything in him was more than sure she felt the way he did.

“The way I would feel when I look at them, is how I feel with you, calm, Seen, heard, like I'm not alone. But you also make me feel things I've never in my life experienced with Jungwon. You make me nervous. I’ve never ever in my life felt like this towards anyone before because I always made sure that I was alone. With the others it's so easy…but with you, I don’t want your friendship Jungwon, I like you.”

Jungwon had no idea what to say, he was completely stuck, he had never expected for her to be sitting right here confessing to him that she liked him.

“I like you too.”

[dissosiation]

i wish she knew how often shes in my dreams. i also wish she would leave me alone but alas

[morningmask27]

Tonight, right now, not even ten minutes ago, might have been the closest I got to an outright hatecrime

[tardis--dreams]

Me panicking because i have 9 missed calls and 5 emails talking about my absence and how "a colleague could take over for me" vs. Me knowing it's really not that important no matter how pushy a client is and that on top of it I'm underpaid and have way to much overtime so i shouldn't even care

[foxgirlmoth]

I don't talk about this stuff on here pretty much at all, but a past relationship really broke a ton of bits and pieces of my brain and heart in weird ways (I'm finally thinking about him almost never but the shit he pulled was abusive as hell and still affects me sometimes). Being in love with my current girlfriends for a while felt almost. Painful? Almost like I should be ashamed I can fall so deeply in love with people, and especially how quickly that can happen sometimes too. Thats how it kind of felt. I tend to get overwhelmed with emotions if I'm feeling them very strongly, and that has been extremely embarrassing and also felt almost like I was being a burden to those I love (which love is the main emotion that can 'get dialed up to 11' for me). It IS debilitating in some ways!!! It hasn't gotten bad enough I've been nonverbal in a really really long time but that happened this past week and it was wild to me.

Things are getting better now though! Therapy in the past has helped, and honestly having such patient and understanding partners has made a world of difference ;w;. my wife is someone who was one of my best friends and I had a huge crush on and now I can ask for cuddles and we can nap together and I've fallen so much in love. Her and her presence are literally heaven for me, I don't know if anything has ever made me happier than just laying next to her and feeling her warmth.

Worries of course flare up and I feel like I need to lean on her a lot during those moments, but I don't feel like too much of a burden to her. I love seeing the posts that say stuff like 'Its okay to be a burden' or 'its okay to be annoying' because really truly I think I need to be those things to survive sometimes. I can be 'a lot' and I can be a little bit obsessive and those things aren't inherently bad or evil of me. I just make sure I'm feeling okay during and after and make sure I'm checking in on myself often. I'm a bit of a broken girl, but that doesn't mean I'm not extremely happy and living a life I love. I've written poems and everything about how it feels like it must hurt to love me and my broken jagged edges, but hey, even if it does a little bit, it doesn't mean someone like my girlfriend/wife won't go through a little bit of burden to love me, and I'm more than happy to return all of this and more for her as well if she's ever in need or feels broken ;^;

[love-killed-the-superstar]

i need more of jiro in tlr2 because i think it would be good for uno to have a role model to show him how uncool it is to constantly pick on your brother

[starlit-mansion]

i still keep getting recommended posts about the james somerton debacle (unsurprising) and i swear to god, at this point i've spent more time trying to remember what my reaction was to watching his yoi video a while back while half-sleep deprived or smth than i a) spent watching the video and b) spent thinking about any other creator i watched one mid video from and ignored after

[jinwoosbabyboo]

My Husband

Calling the LADS Men your husband in public while still in the boyfriends stage. [Requested by: fish-crow-star-snowman]

Zayne

[Ordering sweets at a bakery]

MC: I'll have six of the macarons and I believe my husband would like the matcha coconut doughnut

Zayne would be shocked hearing those words come out of your mouth. He would eye you up and down before smiling as the butterflies in his stomach went crazy.

Cashier: Will that be all?

Zayne: Yes that is all unless my wife wants anything else

Rafayel

[Walking around the night market]

Stranger: You're very beautiful. Could I get your number?

MC: *Grabs Rafayel's arm* I'm actually here with my husband

Rafayel: What made you think you were good enough to even look at her?

As soon as the guy walks away Rafayel starts fanboying over the fact that you called him your husband.

Rafayel: You trynna wife me up?

MC: You're supposed to wife me up

Rafayel: I don't know that sounded like a proposal

MC: It wasn't

Rafayel: Don't be shy I'll gladly marry you

MC: I want a divorce

Rafayel: We're not even married yet 😰

MC: Well you talk too much

Xavier

[Booking a cooking class]

MC,*on the phone*: Yes for two just me and my husband alright see you then thank you

Xavier stopped whatever he was doing and stared at you, slack jawed, with those big blue doe eyes.

Xavier: Your husband?

MC: Yea ... is it a problem that I called you that?

Xavier: N-no I- I like it

MC: Good I'll keep doing it then

Xavier: Does that mean I can .... call you my wife?

MC: I'd like that

Xavier: Good ..... my wife

He chuckles to himself as if the words tingled on his lips. Before you knew it he was picking you up by the waist.

Xavier: My pretty wife

Sylus

[A day shopping in Linkon]

Cashier: Will that be cash or card?

MC: Oh my husband got it

Sylus says nothing as he swipes his card and grabs your bags from the counter. He doesn't say anything until you're alone in his car.

Sylus: Your husband huh?

MC: Is that not what you want to be?

Sylus: I'll be whatever you allow me to be sweetie

MC: Then you're my husband

Sylus: I'll have the papers drawn up by end of day

MC: What about my ring?

Sylus: You'll get that soon

MC: Why are we skipping steps?

Sylus: If I recall correctly you started it kitten

MC: You’re such a kid sometimes

[pellucid-constellations]

I'd Answer

You've been gone. Azriel's been broken. Something has to change, and Azriel would do anything.

Part 2 of If You Cared to Ask

“This is for you,” Mor huffed, plopping down a small bouquet of roses onto the growing garden that seemed to have sprouted on the table. “What is that, number twelve?” 

“I don’t know, I don’t count them,” you brushed off, your gaze falling on the gifts for a fleeting moment.

Mor hummed. “Are they doing anything for you?” 

“Not particularly.” 

Your friend shuffled into the small sitting room and gracefully landed in the chair beside yours, her eyes piercing a hole in the side of your head when you refused to look up. She sighed, and then sighed again, making a show of slotting her chin in her palm and looking forlorn. 

The third sigh was your breaking point. 

You placed your book on the table and turned to Mor with your brows raised. “Yes?” 

“Oh, nothing,” she airily replied. “I was just wondering when you were going to give this up. You don’t have to forgive the guy, but at least put me out of my misery and let me tell him where you’re staying. I’m basically a delivery service at this point. He says sorry again, by the way.” 

“Oh, well in that case—” 

“More than just sorry, but I can’t remember everything he said. It was all rambly and his face was all gaunt.” Mor pressed her fingers up to cover her eyes. “I’m not even sure if he’s eating. Rhys had to stop sending him out because he almost fell out of the sky.”

“Is this supposed to make me feel bad?”

You hoped your ruse was believable because hearing that Azriel was doing so poorly did make you feel bad. Your heart lept up to your throat at the prospect of your mate falling from the sky from exhaustion. But he had had so many opportunities to make this right and you weren’t about to give up your anger so easily. 

Mor offered a sad expression that looked authentic this time. “Y/n, he loves you. He’s an idiot and the whole lot of them are mindless fools, but Azriel has never loved anything the way he loves you.” 

“Yeah, I’m sure,” you snorted. “And he shows that love by forgetting me and then arguing when I’m clearly upset over it?” 

“I know. He told me how much of an ass he’s been. But, I promise you, I’ve known Azriel for a long time. He was just—just handling everything with Rhys poorly. He felt so so guilty when Rhys got trapped. You know that.” 

You bit the inside of your cheek and avoided Mor’s gaze. “I know.” 

The lack of vitriol in your tone had Mor perking up. “And you remember how hard he tried to get him back—how broken he was when Rhys sent out his last message. Az feels responsible for everything when it comes to his family.”

You didn’t need the reminder. The tortured way he carried himself over the past 50 years was evidence enough of the truth behind Mor’s words. And you had been there to soothe that pain, to help run the court that Rhys left behind. 

When silence persisted, Mor craned her neck to catch your gaze. “I’m not saying what he did was right, but you know he’s been in overdrive since Rhys returned. He goes off on those missions when Rhys calls, but… y/n, he only leaves without notice when his informants…” 

Mor trailed off. 

Your gaze finally flickered up. “When?” 

Mor bit her lip and winced. “He told me not to tell you this part. He said he didn’t want you to think he was making excuses.” 

“Tell me anyways.” 

“Fine. But you can’t rat me out.” Mor sighed and leaned back in the chair, still facing you. “He does go on every mission Rhys proposes, and that’s… stupid, but he tells you about those ones, I think. When he just up and leaves, it’s because—y/n, it’s because they're about you. You know there’s a slew of people that want you dead for your involvement up in Illyria. He has a team of informants with the sole purpose of listening for you name.

“He goes on Rhys’s missions because he doesn’t want his family separated again, but sometimes, it’s because he just wants to protect his mate.” 

A stone dropped past your ribs and into your stomach. “But, he never told me—” 

“You know these overgrown bats think that suffering in silence is an honorable thing to do,” Mor rolled her eyes. “They overwork themselves fighting the good fight or whatever and seem to forget that the rest of the world is still out there, facing the consequences of their actions. And… I think he just wanted you to feel safe. I think he’s been scared.” 

Something sickly climbed its way up your consciousness. You looked down at your hands as they rested in your lap. 

You hadn’t seen Azriel in six days, and each day had more anger coursing through you, building up a wall that you thought impenetrable. Because you were so angry; Azriel had disappointed you time and time again, left you feeling abandoned and alone, and then he got defensive about it as if you were the one at fault. 

Part of you always knew it was a defense of some sort, but you had thought it a defense of something nefarious. You had tossed around the idea of infidelity a few times, and that rivaled the thought of him simply falling out of love with you. 

But it was this. 

It was him hiding how hard he’d been trying to protect you—however idiotic his tactics may have been. 

“You can tell him where I am,” you murmured clenching your fingers into your palm. “And leave the door unlocked, I guess.” 

Mor had left the small apartment on the outskirts of Velaris before you finished your sentence. 

It took approximately 7 minutes for a tentative knock to sound at your door. 

Mor had left it unlocked, but there was still a knock. 

You took a glance at the pile of flowers on the table before heading to the front door. The old floorboards creaked under your feet, a reminder of the rundown apartment you had sought out after you left. It was a frantic process, searching for a place to stay; you hadn’t cared much for luxury or comfort.  

Opening the door was jarring. Azriel’s wings were half-raised as if he’d just flown down and then forgot how to control them. His face was pallid with dark smudges beneath his eyes. His hair was windswept, expected from the flight, but it looked tugged at and disheveled beyond that. 

“Hi.” 

Maybe you’d been looking him over too long because Azriel’s voice cracked at the single word. He sounded unsure, verging on afraid, and all you had done was pass over his figure with your eyes. 

You tightened your grip on the door handle. “Um, hi.” Your tone was harsher than you meant it to be. 

Azriel flinched. “I’m sorry, Mor said…” 

“No, I—Come in.” 

You stepped back and pushed the door open to accommodate his hesitant steps into your rental. Azriel stood in the middle of the space and wrung his hands as you shuffled behind him, a slight tremor showing in his fingers. You leaned back against the door with your own hands pressed at the small of your back. You watched Azriel’s lingering gaze trail over the flowers in the corner of the room. 

“You didn’t like them?” he meekly asked. 

Something inside of you hurt. 

“They were okay,” you answered. “But I didn’t want flowers.” 

Azriel nodded and his lashes fluttered shut. His hands twitched. 

“I’m sorry—for the flowers, I mean. They were a pathetic reason to send Mor to you. You wanted to be left alone.” 

“I did not want to be left alone, Azriel.” You kicked away from the door, bringing your arms across your chest for some form of protection. “I wanted you. I wanted you to care about me.”

“I do,” Azriel stressed. He took a step forward and the wood beneath his boot creaked. “I do, y/n.  I care about you more than anything—I love you.” 

“Then why couldn’t you show me? Why did it take me leaving, me getting hurt, for you to finally listen to me and see how much I’ve needed you?” 

Your chest was heaving, each word from your lips a choked gasp. Azriel took all of it and absorbed your full meaning, seeming to wince at every insinuation that he didn’t love you. His jaw quivered and he opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out. 

“Why did you stop talking to me?” you asked, a broken rendition of your anger. “Why—Mor told me… She told me things. Things that make sense. But why does it feel like I don’t matter to you?” 

“My love,” Azriel stressed. Yearned. He rushed forward, abandoning all reservations and gathering you into his arms as tears began making headway down your cheeks. “I’m so sorry, baby. I can’t—I’m so so sorry.” His words were almost lost against your temple as he held you, each apology a whisper of a kiss against your skin. 

“You weren’t there and Devlon—he—” 

“I know, angel, I know and I’m so sorry. Had I known… Had I listened.” He pulled you back from his chest, crouching down to meet your eye and wiping tears from your cheeks. “All I’ve ever wanted to do was keep you safe. I thought I was doing that. I don’t know what Mor told you—” 

“She told me everything. She told me you’ve been following leads about me and taking on too much. She told me you’re scared.” 

Azriel breathed and it sounded anguished. “I am terrified. We lost Rhysand and now you are in the throes of a society that almost killed me. I—I wake up every morning and everything is good and I am so afraid to lose that. I thought I was protecting you, protecting us. But I almost lost you and—” 

You let out a breathy cry. “You could never lose me, Azriel.” 

He pressed his forehead to yours, the wetness of his cheeks now apparent. Azriel’s hands were firm on either side of your head and his fingers laced up into your hair. 

Gods, you missed him. 

You missed him and everything hurt. 

“I’ll do better. I’ll be better. Just please—please, don’t leave again. Please come home. Let me fix this.”

The want was overwhelming. It would be so easy to say yes, but it would be just as easy for nothing to change. 

“You can’t do that again, Azriel,” you stressed, shaking your head and causing your mate to draw back. Only a breath was left between you. “You have to tell me what’s going on. You can’t—you can’t leave me in the dark. You can’t make me feel like that.”

Azriel’s head shook in desperation. “I won’t. I promise I won’t.” 

“I need to know I can rely on you—trust you.” 

“You can, angel.” 

“I need to know that you love me.” 

A pained sound escaped Azriel’s throat. He licked his lips and reaffirmed his hold on your face, locking his eyes with yours in a beseeching gaze. 

“I love you more than life itself, angel. I couldn’t breathe when you were gone. I can’t believe I made you think that I don’t. You are my life. Let me show you. Please, let me show you.”

You tracked your eyes between both of his. “Okay, Azriel.” 

“I’m going to keep you safe.”

“I am safe.” 

“I love you.” 

"I know you do, Az. I know."

[reshinless]

Imagine

Kinich with

With a breeding kink

Imagine him not allowed to finish inside at the beginning, but gods does he beg to

Eventually reader gives in and allows him to

Hhhhhhhhes so jekfmekdkfke😞

──── i wanna see some!!

⠀ ۪ ⠀✧ synopsis. baby fever & kinich (i cant think of anything aesthetic)

⠀ ۪ ⠀✧ pairings. kinich x gn!afab!reader !!NSFW CONTENT AHEAD!!

⠀ ۪ ⠀✧ director's notice. thank you all again for 1k, i might be a bit slow with posts since projects are going crazy at class rn sob

kinich who has to plead and beg to cum inside of you. even if it is in the heat of the moment; there's no shame in asking, you are his partner after all.

after a few times where stress gets to you and you both wanna relieve it (sex)- you might as well indulge into the activity, right?

but after a few more tries, you can sense how tempted your lover was to keep your hips attached to his before he came, literally having to ask you with that oh-so-whiny voice.

"ah- pretty, please- ahhn- fffuck let me cum in you- need it s'bad." you felt bad hearing how desperate he was, but no no no you both had lives outside of this. it could be a lot of hassle. jokes on you though because he already has baby names planned out for them ^_^

so in love with the way your hole just takes him so good he can't help but ask more and more, it'd be an honor to orgasm with you anyway, he wouldn't have it any other way.

kinich who already had your legs hoisted up on his shoulder, his gloved grip strong against the plush of your thighs, archons was he hot. "p- please.. c'mon i've been treating you real nice, right? let me breed you." he whispered into your ear as he leaned forward.

ever since he saw you with mualani's baby niece in your arms, cooing to her like how any parent would. making the small child in your arms smile, and giggle at your peekaboo attempts, or how you tickled her with a sense of gentleness.

what would your kids with him look like? shit he could already imagine.. his black-blue hair and your (e/c) colored eyes. or what if they had your hair, and his eyes? or maybe they'd be your little carbon copy, and take after their dad for personality. his mind hasn't stopped ever since seeing the situation unfold in front of him.

but when you finally let him, of course he has to build up the best orgasm for you both to share! fitting his head into the crook of your neck; "what do you think our kids would look like? or act like?" it felt like the more he talked, the faster he went. "mmph.. maybe i jus' wanna see you with a round belly. jus' wanna see you bearing our child."

he could already imagine life after you've given birth, what would he name them if it were to be a girl, or perhaps a boy? maybe a mixture of both of your names? or let you decide?

"ahh- u- uhuh? you like the way i thrust into you, right? i'd hate for you to be uncomfortable." he hummed as he continued drilling his cock into you. your hole was already so wet from the previous foreplay beforehand, well of course when you let him cum inside, he'll want a taste of your pussy before it's alllll gone!

he'll still ask you if he could kiss you right after. he wants to make what'll happen now special for you and him to look back onto in the future. laughing or not at the past, he'll make sureit's memorable..

of course by the evident, and growing bulge in your tummy. oh fffuck you could feel it coming already-

"d- don't cum yet, p- pretty. w'na do it together." he mumbles out, barely being able to control himself, he placed one of your stray palms onto the mark on your stomach. "you feel me inside you?"

you couldn't help but let out a loud moan, throwing your head back before he quickly pulls your hair to look back at him.

"don't look anywhere else, pretty, i wanna see the way you look when i make you cream on my dick while i cum too. okay?"

you could hear the loud sound of his shaft slapping against you loudly in the stray hallways of the outside lobby of the hotel you both stayed in- previously on a mission.

even what felt like the fifteenth time you've came on his cock again, it just seemed like it only throbbed, continuously hard throughout all your climaxes. each dominant vein on his cock you could feel, the way his grip tightened around your waist as he took the gloves on his hands with his mouth to make sure not to waste a drop.

"mmf- k- kin i'm g'na-" you try to close your thighs, but to no avail, as kinich's palm, previously on your hair, moves swiftly to keep them open. "i know y'can take me baby, don't worry."

kinich who wrapped a possessive arm around you as you came, holding your waist close to his as you came. as his warm load shot up inside you, letting you arch your back all you wanted on the base of his cock. your arms instinctively rang around his neck, still shaking, trembling almost from coming with him.

he slowly let you lay down on the comfort of the pillows.

he leans down next to you, his fingers still keeping themselves inside your hole.

"not a drop wasted, 'kay?"

he couldn't wait 'till the day came that he'd be able to see kids of both your descents-

"what's with all the-" ajaw's jaw drops at the scene of you cuddling, and kinich hand still inside your hole.

"..." "..YOU ARE DISGUSTING!!"

i kind of ran out mid way for ideas, so sorry if this isn't what you were looking for sob

[inkedinshadows]

Nights and Days

Pairing: Azriel × reader

Summary: Azriel and Y/N are on a mission in Illyria, but as they move from one camp to another, they’re caught in a blizzard and are forced to find shelter in the nearest inn. Thanks to the shadowsinger, there's only one bed.

Warnings: 18+, smut, oral (f receiving), fingering, p in v, just a sprinkle of shadow play, language, lots of witty banter

Word count: 6.3k

A/N: this is my first time writing smut, so I'd really appreciate it if you let me know what you think 🥺

Groups of rebels had begun to appear all over Illyria, claiming that Rhys was not a good High Lord, that a low-born bastard was not suited to be their general, and that training their women was nothing more than a waste of time.

After two weeks of diplomacy that led to absolutely nothing, Rhys had dispatched the Inner Circle to deal with the rebels. Mor and Amren had stayed in Velaris to make sure nothing happened, but the others had been sent out to Illyria. And Y/N had been paired up with Azriel.

They were flying from one war camp to the next—Y/N trying to focus on anything other than Azriel holding her close as he flew—when it started to snow.

“Is it safe to keep going?” she asked him, glancing at his beautiful wings flapping behind him.

“Would you rather I land now? In the middle of nowhere?” Azriel looked down at her with a little smirk on his face. “Give me some credit, Y/N. I can handle a little snow.”

She rolled her eyes at him. “Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot you’re a big, tough Illyrian warrior. My bad.”

He didn't answer, but she didn't need to look at him to know he was still smirking. That annoyingly attractive smirk always made her want to kiss him. She focused on the forest below, on anything other than his lips and how close they’d be if she would just turn her head his way.

They flew in silence for just a few more minutes before the snow began to fall more heavily. Y/N simply looked at Azriel with a raised eyebrow, not bothering to use words.

“You’re insufferable, you know that?” he said when he noticed her expression, but there was a hint of amusement in his voice. “Camp is not that far. We can still make it.”

“Azriel, did you wake up this morning and just decided to be stupid?” She pointed at the grey sky above them, where more clouds were gathering with the promise of more snow to come. “You see that, right? It’s already late and we both know it’ll only get worse. We won’t reach the next camp before it turns into a blizzard. Besides, I’m freezing my ass off out here.”

His only answer was a low chuckle. “Oh, yeah? The poor princess is freezing her little ass off?”

She smacked him on the shoulder. “My ass is anything but little, shadowsinger. Shouldn’t you find us a shelter or something, instead of making fun of me?”

“Said the one who just called me stupid,” he pointed out. He lifted a brow, flashing her another one of those smirks. “Maybe you should apologize for that, and I might think about landing somewhere.”

She cocked her head, unsure if he was messing around or not. “I refuse to apologize for telling the truth. And you’d better land soon, or I’ll kick your ass when you do.”

Azriel’s laugh echoed in her ears, and it took all her focus not to smile just at that sound she so rarely got to hear. “As if you could actually kick my ass.”

If her arms hadn’t been wrapped around his neck, she would have crossed them over her chest. Or maybe she would have used them to strangle him, if only it wouldn't mean they'd fall out of the sky. Eventually, she settled to roll her eyes again. “Azriel, I’m being serious.”

Though she enjoyed their usual banter and she knew as well as everyone that she could never kick his ass, she hadn’t lied. Even with her Illyrian leathers, she was starting to freeze out there in the snow, and there was no way they would reach their destination without being caught in a full-blown blizzard.

“Relax. Despite what you think, Y/N, I’m not stupid.” He gestured to something below them just as she opened her mouth to protest. “It’s an inn. You would have noticed it already, if only you hadn’t been so busy complaining.”

“Shut up,” she grumbled, squinting to see through the trees and the snow. But as Azriel glided down, she finally saw it. It was a rather large building for an inn in the middle of the woods—many Illyrians probably passed through it—so there was a high chance of finding a couple of rooms to spend the night in.

Azriel landed and gently set her on the ground. Together, they headed for the door and were welcomed inside by the warmth of a fire in the corner of the room. She shook the snow off her hair as she took in their surroundings—a few tables full of Illyrian warriors, most of them drinking and laughing quite loudly.

“We ran out of double rooms.” The innkeeper looked at them as they approached, apparently too bored to even bother with greetings. “But we’ve still got a few single ones.”

Before she could tell him that two rooms were perfect, Azriel was already answering. “We need only one, actually.”

Next thing she knew, he had grabbed her hand and was leading her up the stairs, a key now clutched in his fingers. She waited for the door to close behind them before she turned to him with a frown. “What the hell was that? Why only one room?”

Azriel tossed his pack on the floor and replied as if the answer was obvious. “The hall was packed with drunk Illyrians.”

“So?”

He looked at her then, and she couldn’t quite understand what she saw in his eyes. Was it concern? Or frustration because she still didn’t realize something he thought was so simple?

“I’m not letting you sleep in another room alone, when a bunch of drunk Illyrians have just seen you, probably the only female here, walk in.”

Well, that was not what she expected. But as she thought it over, she couldn’t deny he had a point. She was able to hold her own in a fight, just not against fully trained warriors, and she didn't want to take any risk, especially when it was just one night.

Not knowing what to answer, she looked around the room, which consisted of only one bed and a small dresser—lame and boring, but it would do. Except for the one single bed.

She watched as Azriel sat on an old rug, the only decoration there was. “And what are you doing now, exactly?”

He shrugged, with that same expression that seemed to tell her the answer was obvious. “I'll take the floor, you take the bed.”

She almost laughed at that. “You can't sleep on the floor, not with your wings. I'll do it.”

“I'll be fine,” he replied, and extended his wings behind him as if to prove it. “Why would you want to sleep on the floor anyway?”

“Because I don't want you to do it,” she answered matter-of-factly. “Now get your ass off that floor, shadowsinger.”

Azriel did no such thing and instead leaned back against the wall and extended his legs in front of him. Her gaze dropped to his thighs, the muscles shifting with the movement.

“Why would I do that? It's comfortable here.”

She looked up again, her arms crossed over her chest. “It's not and you know it.”

Both of them too stubborn to give in, they glared at each other. She made no move to sit on the bed, and he made no move to get up. They probably could have spent hours like this, but she couldn't stand the idea of Azriel sleeping on a half-consumed rug, even if it meant she'd do it.

“You wouldn't want to face the rebels with a sore body tomorrow, would you?” she tried, hoping it'd make him think straight.

“I've slept on the ground before, I'll be fine. Big, tough Illyrian warrior, remember?” His lips twitched up, and amusement glinted in his hazel eyes. “Just take the bed, Y/N. We have a long day ahead of us.”

“Which is exactly why you should sleep on the bed, Az,” she snapped before taking a deep breath and speaking more calmly. “I'm just the backup. It doesn't matter if I'm sore.”

“It matters to me.”

His words hung heavily in the air, and she swallowed, not sure how to react to them or to the fervor in his voice. There was an intensity in his eyes that she’d never seen before and, unable to his gaze any longer, she blinked.

“You’re not going to budge, are you?” she asked with a sigh, her arms falling back to her sides.

“No.” And there it was again, that teasing grin she usually wanted to kiss. Right now, though, she felt more like punching him for his stubbornness. It outmatched even her own. “So I suggest you listen and take the bed. You need some rest.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Oh, and you don't?”

This time, it was his turn to sigh and roll his eyes at her. “Y/N, I’ll be fine. I’ve slept in worse conditions, and it’s only just one night anyway.”

And yet, the thought of him sleeping on that rug while she was all comfortable on the bed didn’t sit right with her. Just like her well-being mattered to him, his mattered to her. Maybe it was because he’d admitted it, or because he’d rather sleep on the floor than let her stay in another room when the place was full of Illyrians. Or maybe she was just trying to find some kind of excuse, but the words were out before she could think better of them.

“Sleep on the bed. With me.”

Azriel’s eyes widened, and she immediately regretted even thinking about it. “I beg your pardon?”

“I mean… it’s just…” she stuttered, her cheeks heating up as she looked away. What a huge mistake she’d just made. Just because he cared about her didn’t mean he’d want to share a bed with her. What was she even thinking? “I know it’s small and there’s not much space, but I just… I thought it’d still be more comfortable than the floor… you know?” Her voice trailed off, and she stared down at her feet.

Deafening silence filled the room, and then Azriel finally spoke, his tone cautious. “And that’s all you were asking?”

She frowned, not sure what else she might have been asking. But she quickly realized what words she had used and how that could potentially sound like something more than an offer to share the bed. Sleep on the bed. With me. Cauldron, she was so stupid. Her face turned an even deeper shade of red. When was the last time she had blushed?

“No, I wasn’t— that’s not what I—” She couldn’t get the words out, and it didn’t help that her mind was now wandering toward certain scenarios that involved the two of them, a bed, and very little clothing. She turned away from him and mumbled, “Whatever.”

“I think this is the first time I've ever seen you speechless.” There was amusement in his voice, and she knew the asshole was smirking once more. “You should watch your word choice if that’s not what you intended to ask.”

“Yeah, I know. Sorry,” she murmured as she reached for her pack, but when she took her nightgown out, she realized there was no place to go to get changed. How was she supposed to change in front of him after such an embarrassing mistake? So instead, she delayed the moment she’d have to do it by trying to explain again. “It wasn’t my intention to imply anything. It came out wrong.”

She could feel his eyes on her as he answered. “I noticed. What was your intention, then?”

The look she gave him was one of annoyance. He knew exactly what her intention was, and he just liked to mess with her. She glared at him for a moment before she replied, “I meant what I said. I don’t want you to sleep on that rug, and you don’t want me to do it either. So, the only other option is that we share the bed.”

“Mh, I see.” His lips tugged up in a self-satisfied grin that just made her want to hit him to see it disappear. Not that she could hit him even if she really wanted to. Azriel would block her blow with little effort. But how could she have ever wanted to kiss him?

“So sleeping next to me is the only option?” he added.

“You know what?” she snapped, gesturing to the rug where he was still sitting like it was the most comfortable place he’d ever been. “I changed my mind. Sleep on the floor. I don’t care.”

He chuckled. Chuckled. Cauldron boil her.

She turned her back on him and, without giving it any second thought, she began undressing. She hadn’t realized how warm the Illyrian leathers were until she shivered as soon as she took them off.

“It seems like you’re cold,” Azriel drawled from behind her.

“I’m not,” she replied. She put on her nightgown and sought refuge under the covers. “Not for long, anyway.”

How was Azriel going to spend the night on a rug, without a blanket? When he didn’t answer, she considered maybe asking him one last time to share the bed. Out of the goodness of her heart, she supposed.

But then Azriel spoke again, amusement clear in his voice. And the goodness of her heart be damned.

“You're cold, aren't you?”

She sighed, wrapping the blanket tighter around her body. “No.”

“Liar.”

“Prick.”

“I'm the prick? You're the one who suggested we should share the bed.”

Y/N resisted the urge to turn on her side and face him. Maybe it was stupid and childish of her, but she kept lying with her back to him. “I don't see how that makes me a prick, Az. Besides, you're the one who made fun of me because of it, which means you're the prick here.”

His voice still carried a sense of playfulness as he answered. “I made fun of you because you stumbled over your words like a fool. It was quite amusing, to be honest.”

Instead of replying, she slid a hand out from under the blanket and flipped him off over her shoulder. As she hid it again and curled up in the bedsheets, Azriel’s soft laugh made her smile despite herself.

She heard some noise and, assuming he was getting changed and ready for the night, she closed her eyes. But her mind was running wild.

Images of his hands on her. Of her hands on him. Their lips touching, first tenderly, then passionately. Their bodies pressed together as pleasure overcame them. All scenarios she had never let herself fully consider before, now evoked by Azriel's misunderstanding of her words. Scenarios she now knew for sure would never happen if the way he'd teased her for even suggesting sharing the bed was any indication.

“Make room for me?”

His voice was so close to her that she started, her head snapping around to find him standing next to the bed. He had taken off his leathers and was now wearing loose pants and a shirt. His wings were tucked in tight behind him—those beautiful wings that she knew were bigger than Cassian's and Rhysand's. She still wasn't sure she should believe Mor about the correlation between an Illyrian's wingspan and other body parts.

“Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you,” he added with a small smile.

“You and your absurdly silent steps,” she grumbled, but she was already moving to the other side of the bed.

Only that there wasn’t exactly an ‘other side’, not when the bed was barely big enough for both of them. As Azriel slipped under the sheets, she found herself with her back pressed against his chest. His familiar scent of night-chilled mist and cedar filled her senses, and his warmth seeped through her, chasing away the remnants of the cold that even the blanket hadn’t yet managed to rid her of.

“Tell me you don’t move a lot when you sleep,” she said as he settled behind her. “Because if you push me off, I’ll make you regret not staying on that rug.”

His laugh skittered down her back. “You always have something to say, don't you?”

“I promise you, the moment there will be nothing to say, I will shut up,” she replied with a chuckle.

Silence fell and Y/N nestled more against his side. She just couldn't help it. Feeling him so close, their bodies pressing together... it was intoxicating, and she wanted to stay like that forever. She hesitated a moment, and then she decided that she might as well do it: grabbing his arm, she wrapped it around her waist and laced their fingers together, their intertwined hands resting against her stomach. Azriel tensed behind her, and she thought he might pull away, but he didn’t. Instead, he released a deep breath that tickled the back of her neck.

“I would never let you fall off the bed,” he murmured. His voice was so close to her ear that it almost made her shiver. And as if to show he really meant what he said, Azriel draped his wings around her.

Y/N suddenly had a lump in her throat. Being enveloped in his wings was somehow more intimate than lying so close to each other. “Glad to hear it,” was all she could think about. After a second, she added in a whisper, “And thank you for not letting me sleep alone.”

Azriel’s arm tightened around her waist, his breath warm against her neck. When he spoke, she could tell by his tone alone that he wanted to say more than just, “You're welcome.” She didn't push him though. He'd tell her when and if he decided to.

She closed her eyes and tried to fall asleep, letting the sound of the blizzard outside lull her, but with Azriel holding her it was nearly impossible. Wrapped in his arms and wings, she felt safe and protected. Everything else seemed to disappear until it was just the two of them in their small cocoon.

“Can you turn over?”

Her eyes opened at his question, but she didn't move. To face him would mean being only inches away from him. She didn't trust herself to be that close to him. To his lips.

“Why?”

“Just turn over, Y/N,” he whispered. “Please.”

It was the vulnerability in his voice—the barely audible ‘please’—that had her giving in. She had never heard him say it before, not like that.

But as she complied, her face was even closer to his than she'd anticipated. Their noses were almost touching, and she made a point not to let her gaze drop to his lips.

Azriel didn't say anything. They stared into each other's eyes for a few moments or maybe an hour—Y/N didn't know. The one thing she knew was that her heart was beating faster in her chest, and it only got worse when he brushed her cheek, his touch gentle and soft. She smiled, and the movement caused his gaze to dip to her mouth. She waited for him to look up again, but he didn't.

Her smile turned into a little smirk. “Are you just going to stare at my lips all night, or do you plan to actually do something about it?”

Azriel looked at her again, and though he tried to look annoyed, she could see a hint of amusement in his eyes. “Why do you always have to make such quick-witted comments?”

“Shut up and kiss me,” she replied before she even knew what she was saying. She didn't regret it though, because he did it.

And the world shrank till there was just Azriel.

His lips were soft against hers, warm and inviting. His hand moved from her cheek to the back of her head, his fingers tangling in her hair as he pulled her closer. She melted against him, opening up for his tongue to slip inside, tasting her slowly, almost reverently. Her heart was beating so fast it might have jumped out of her chest.

She'd wanted this to happen for the longest time, and now that it was real, the leash she'd kept on herself vanished. Every feeling, every emotion she'd stifled for so long, now rushed to the surface like a tidal wave.

What had started as a tender kiss soon turned into something passionate and greedy. She whimpered softly against his lips, and her hands began to make their way down to the hem of his shirt.

“Y/N.” Azriel's whisper stopped her as she looked into his eyes. She could see her own need reflected there. “Are you sure about this?”

“I don't look sure enough to you?” She raised an eyebrow. “Maybe next time I should just send you a note and—”

Azriel silenced her with another kiss. “You and your sarcastic answers,” he murmured with a smile.

Y/N giggled and cupped his cheek, brushing her thumb against his lips. “I mean it, Az,” she said, her tone softer now. “I'm sure about it.”

“Good.” He pulled her flush against him as his hands roamed down her back. “Because if I start, I don't think I could stop.”

“Good,” she repeated before she kissed him again.

Y/N tugged on his shirt, and they parted long enough for her to take it off, though it took a bit of struggle to undo the clasps on his back and free his wings. She'd seen him shirtless before, mostly when he was training—he was a real feast for the eye—but now she got to touch him, to run her hands across his torso and feel him shudder. His mouth descended on her neck in response, leaving a trail of wet kisses while his hands gripped her backside.

“You were right, princess,” he murmured, his breath hot against her skin. “Your ass is definitely not little.”

She chuckled as he kneaded it. “Told you.”

Azriel hummed, planting one last kiss on her neck before he shifted position and Y/N found herself pressed down on the mattress, the shadowsinger now on top of her. As she pulled him closer for their lips to meet yet again, his hands caressed her legs, trailing up her thighs and slipping under her nightgown.

She held her breath as he brushed past her panties, lingering just long enough to make her shiver. He then moved up her body, causing the fabric to rise and reveal her soft flesh.

Y/N broke the kiss, a small sigh leaving her lips when Azriel’s hands reached her breasts. He smiled at the sound, and as their eyes met, his gaze was so full of desire that her core clenched.

She wanted him. She needed him.

Before she could reach between them to push down his pants, Azriel gently stopped her by grabbing her wrists, sensing what her intention was. “Not yet,” he murmured.

She frowned. A slight tug was all it took for him to release her hands, though she didn't try to undress him again. “Why not?”

And there it was again, that smirk. But now, with him on top of her, both of them half naked, she didn't simply want to kiss it. No, she wanted do all the things she'd never let herself consider.

“Because I want to see you first, princess.”

Azriel was already pushing her nightgown up, but as usual, she couldn't keep her mouth shut. “So it's official? You're calling me princess now? You've never done that before.”

He looked down at her with so much desire that it seemed to set her body on fire. “I've never been about to fuck you before,” he answered, his voice low and sultry.

Her thighs clenched together, but before she could come up with a response, Azriel removed her nightgown. Her skin was already so heated she barely felt the bite of the cool air, and it was completely forgotten when he ran his hands all over her body, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

“You're so beautiful,” he whispered as he leaned down to take one of her nipples in his warm mouth, a soft moan escaping her as she shivered.

Her fingers tangled in his hair to keep him close, and she arched against him when his tongue flicked out to tease her.

“And you're so responsive,” he murmured. Hooking a scarred finger into the waistband of her panties, he pulled them down her legs. The scent of her arousal wafted through the room as Azriel nudged her legs open and settled in between them.

Y/N was about to tell him to hurry, her need to feel him against and inside her now almost overwhelming. But she couldn’t form the words, not as Azriel pushed his hips against hers and she felt the evidence of his own arousal pressing hard against her wet core.

His hands caressed her sides, her ass, her thighs, and yet he never touched her where she needed it most.

“Azriel…” she complained, eyes locked on him. She moved her hips to grind against his erection, seeking some sort of friction, and she was rewarded by his sharp inhale. But it still wasn't enough.

“Be patient, Y/N.” His mouth descended on her neck again, biting the soft spot where it met her shoulder. “I want to taste you first. I want to worship every inch of you.”

Even though she closed her eyes at his little nips, she shook her head. “Azriel, I appreciate it. I really do. But you have no idea how long I've waited for this.” Her breath hitched when his tongue swirled around her nipple again. “We can leave the worshipping for later. I need you now.”

“You need me, uh?” He kissed her other breast, and she bucked her hips against him once more. “And you've waited a long time for this?”

Y/N looked at him again, her fingers still clutching his hair. She nodded and realized her mistake too late—a new mischievous gleam entered Azriel's hazel eyes.

His lips trailed down her stomach and toward her belly button. Each kiss sent a shiver right to her core. “Then you can wait a little longer.”

She groaned, her patience now at its limit. “Azriel, you—”

A gasp cut her off as he licked a stripe up her dripping folds. She couldn't tell who moaned first when Azriel tasted her once more, his tongue flicking over her clit.

Her fingers tightened in his black curls and her head fell back on the pillow. Azriel's lips closed around her clit and she clamped a hand on her mouth to keep quiet as he gently sucked on it.

His shadows began to slither up her body, their touch cool against her heated skin. Her breathing quickened and she had to hold back a moan when his tongue was replaced by a finger slowly sliding inside her folds.

But it didn't move. Azriel looked up at her and she wished she could somehow capture the picture: his head between her legs, those beautiful hazel eyes focused on her with an almost predatory intent.

“Don't go all quiet on me now, princess,” he murmured against her skin. “I want to hear all your pretty noises.”

A tendril of shadow brushed against her hand, and she removed it from her mouth. “Az, the other rooms—”

He curled his finger to hit that soft, spongy spot inside her that had her see stars, and she couldn't stop the moan that left her lips.

“I don't care if someone hears you.” His voice was a low, almost commanding growl. “Let them hear you. Let them know you're with me.”

She was about to answer, to tell him she wasn't sure she should, but Azriel added a second finger, and she lost all control, another small cry of pleasure slipping out.

Azriel seemed satisfied because his smirk reappeared. “If I had known this is all it took to put a stop on the witty comments, I would have done it a long time ago.”

Y/N wanted to make one of those very witty comments to prove him wrong, to show him she hadn't become helpless just because of how good he made her feel, but his tongue circled her clit again and Mother above, she was helpless.

“Do you want to come, princess?”

Unable to form even a coherent thought, all she could do was nod, her body on the brink of release as his fingers curled once more, drawing a moan from deep in her throat.

“Use your words, Y/N.”

“Yes… yes, please,” she panted.

But instead of keeping going, of driving her over that sweet, craved edge, Azriel placed a kiss to her inner thigh and slowly removed his fingers from her folds. He even moved away from her, standing up at the foot of the bed.

She groaned, pushing herself up on her elbows to glower at him. “Azriel, you get back here right now.”

He only grinned. “Ah, there she is.”

“If you're doing this just because you missed my comments, you should know that I—”

The words died on her tongue as soon as his hands swiftly undid the buttons of his pants. Her eyes followed his every movement as he pushed them down his legs, watching his muscles shift and his wings unfold ever so slightly to keep him balanced.

He wasn't wearing any underwear.

The realization caused her brain to stop working, and the sight of his naked body took her breath away. Maybe the rumors about Illyrian wingspans were true after all.

Her mouth dry, she swallowed before finally speaking again. “Azriel,” she repeated, her voice quivering with barely restrained desire. “Get back here right now.”

For once, he obliged without questioning, his grin wide.

Climbing onto the bed, he crawled up her body until his cock pressed against her entrance, her need for him now through the roof.

Their eyes met, and slowly—too slowly—Azriel pushed in, stretching her inch by delicious inch, both of them releasing a moan when he bottomed out, his hips flush against her.

“Fuck,” he groaned, the sound shooting straight down to her core. “Fuck, Y/N... you feel incredible.”

She had no words to describe how he felt inside her. ‘Incredible’ was an understatement, but her mind was too foggy to think of something else. The only thing she was sure of was that she needed him to move.

“Azriel,” she breathed as she wrapped her legs around him. He shuddered when she accidentally brushed his wings with her toes. “Please, move. Now.”

With his elbows on either side of her head, he leaned down to kiss her, pulling out almost all the way. “I love hearing you beg for it,” he whispered against her lips, and rocked back into her with a quick roll of his hips before she could even think of a response.

He didn’t even try to go slow, instead immediately setting a relentless pace that left her panting, but she didn’t mind. Every choked sound and breathless moan were swallowed by his kiss, their tongues swirling together. Her hands found their way into his hair, around his neck, down his back, and her nails scraped along his warm and slightly sweaty skin while he thrust into her, her hips rising to meet his.

Azriel’s own groans and whimpers were music to the ears, each of them bringing her closer to release. As if he knew her body well enough already, he seemed to sense it too, because his lips left hers to trail down her neck.

“That’s it, princess,” he praised. His clipped voice let her know he was probably trying to hold back his own impending orgasm. “Come for me.”

His shadows flew in the little space between their bodies to tease her clit, drawing a guttural groan from her. It was like nothing she’d ever felt before—cool against her hot skin, a barely-there touch that yet was enough to make her shudder and whine. But it was the uniqueness of it all that sent her toppling over the edge.

A loud cry broke from her as her vision blurred and her body tensed, her nails slightly digging into Azriel’s back while he slowed his thrusts to draw out her pleasure. But he soon resumed his punishing pace, his hips slamming into hers almost frantically, the sound of skin on skin filling the small room as he chased his own release.

She choked out his name right as he stilled, hot spurts of cum filling her, his last few moans muffled when she pulled him in for another desperate kiss.

They were both panting by the time they broke apart, but neither of them tried to move. Azriel still lay buried deep inside her, and simply rested his forehead against hers, a smile on his lips that mirrored her own.

Despite his heavy breaths, his brows raised as he asked playfully, “So was the wait worth it?”

“It was,” she answered with a chuckle. Her hands came up to cup his face, her thumbs brushing over his cheekbones. “You certainly know what you’re doing, shadowsinger.”

Wrong words.

“Is that so?” His grin only widened, and he gave another roll of his hips that dragged a groan from the back of her throat.

She slapped him on the shoulder, but her smile matched his. “Smug ass.”

Azriel's soft laugh tickled her cheek as he kissed it. Slowly, he pulled out of her, leaving her with a feeling of emptiness.

Not ready to let him go just yet, she curled up in his arms as soon as he lay down next to her. Azriel immediately embraced her, holding her close to his chest, their legs tangled.

A comfortable silence settled over them as they bathed in the afterglow of sex, interrupted only by their soft breathing and the blizzard still raging outside.

As the minutes passed, Y/N struggled to keep her eyes open, but she had always wanted to trace the swirling lines of Azriel's tattoos, and now she had her chance. Her fingers danced along the Illyrian design, following the pattern from his neck to his arm, then lingering a bit longer on his sculpted pecs and feeling the muscle beneath her fingertips. His heart was beating fast, pounding in his chest.

“Can you promise me something?”

She glanced up at him, his eyes already fixed on her. The corner of her lips twitched upwards. “Depends on what it is.”

Azriel was silent for a long moment before he spoke again with a new seriousness in his tone. “Promise me that we’ll give this a chance. That we’ll give… us a chance.”

Her fingers halted their roaming, her heart skipped a bit, and a part of her whispered that she had heard that wrong, that she had misunderstood. No way he was actually asking her what she thought he was asking her, despite just having had sex.

She had to swallow the lump in her throat to be able to murmur, “Do you mean that?”

Azriel's eyes softened, like he knew she was even more vulnerable now than while they were fucking, and that whether her heart broke or not depended entirely on his answer.

“I’ve waited for this for a long time too, Y/N,” he said gently, cupping her cheeks to look right into her eyes. “I don’t want just this one night with you. I want all the nights you’ll give me.”

Y/N smiled then, so bright it could have lit up the whole room. She wanted to kiss him senseless, to hold him tight and never let go. And nothing was stopping her anymore, she realized, so she did just that.

She showered his face with tiny kisses. Every beautiful inch, from his nose to his jawline, from his eyebrow to his chin. Azriel's arms wrapped around her middle to pull her closer, and she relented her assault only when he chuckled.

Their eyes met again, and she knew there was no turning back now. But she would never turn back now.

“I’ll give you all the nights in the world, Az,” she finally said once the burst of joy subsided. “And the days, too. I'll give you anything you want.”

His smile was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. It was wider than ever before and the urge to touch his small dimples rushed through her—dimples she'd never known he had, but that she'd do anything to see again.

When he kissed her, it was slow yet passionate, gentle yet desperate, their breaths mingling, their hands caressing cheeks and running through hair.

“You're the only thing I want,” Azriel murmured once their lips parted. “Every night and every day. I want only you.”

Those were probably the most beautiful words she'd ever heard. Not even in her dreams did she imagine he would say them. Dwelling on what it would be like to share moments of passion was one thing, but this…

She moved to straddle him, mindful of his wings splayed out beneath him. She wanted to run her fingers down their length, and hopefully, sooner rather than later, she might get to do just that.

“Then I hope you're not too tired, shadowsinger.” She leaned down to trail kisses along his tattoo, but her eyes never left his. “Because you can't say something like that without expecting me to fuck you again.”

His hands tightened their grip on her thighs, her words enough to ignite the fire in him once more. “I'm yours, princess. We have all night.”

“All the nights,” she corrected him with a grin, already grinding on him. “And all the days.”

Maybe they would be facing the rebels with sore bodies, after all.

Tags: @mrsjna @navyblue-eternity @paintedbyshadows @highladyandromeda @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @azrielsmate3 @mollygetssherlockcoffee @mirandasidefics @tinystarfishgalaxy @cynthiesjmxazrielslover

(If I accidentally added someone who wanted to be tagged only in part 3 of A Helping Hand and not the general tag list, please let me know and I'll fix it)