#but i was told 'theres a chance one might be available' today

[bas-rouge]

Uhhhh yeah the Collie blog is going to be dead for like the next two weeks, I've packed up my old Collie magazines and am packing up my newer ones (80s-now) today. 🥲 I'm hoping to have a better set up for them, too, since I'm going to try and turn my new closet into a puppy room 🤞

[freesomebodybyluna]

...

[beomglocks]

terror ave. ; c.bg

warnings and other: um?, theres a serial killer, murder is mentioned, nothing too detailed, not proofread bc i wrote this at 4am

"we advise everyone to be in complete lockdown as there have seemed to have been reports of a serial killer gone loose in the area. so far no one has been injured but we suggest taking extra precautions tonight. please do not go outside during this time. lock your doors, close your windows, and turn off all the ligh-"

frowning, you look down at the tub of ice cream situated in between your legs. you lick the ice cream from your spoon as the rest of the news report gets drowned out by your thoughts. wait- shit i think i forgot to lock the back door... you shrug. you forgot that you had invited your neighbor beomgyu over, earlier in the day. he had insisted that he had a cool new pokemon to show you on his switch and you, stupidly, allowed him to show you. to your dismay, it only turned out to be a measly skwovet.

"gyu, you can literally catch these at route 1. you know, in the beginning of the game?" you had told him with a disappointed look on your face. "you're on your 5th gym."

he had gasped in offense, bringing his switch closer to his chest to shield the creature from further judgment. "y/n how dare you! it's the cutest pokemon in the game so of course, i went back to get one. don't you think you're being too mean?"

you giggled to yourself remembering the little back and forth. you've been living alone in your current house for only a couple of months. you were surprised your parents let you move out and have a whole house in the suburbs to yourself considering how strict and overprotective they were. upon moving, you quickly befriended choi beomgyu, the literal boy next door. he had offered to help you get your couch through the door and proceeded to eat his melting chocolate bar on said couch. from then on you and him have been best friends ever since, sometimes having him sleepover or vise versa.

you weren't worried about some rando serial killer in your neighborhood since nothing ever happened to you. you were convinced you weren't the main character.

from your couch, you looked outside to see that beomgyu's lights were already turned off. he must've gone to sleep early. your eyes catch the clock on your wall and you subconsciously yawn when you see how late it is. 1:56 am? damn... i should probably go to sleep too.

you pick up the tub of ice cream and take it back to your kitchen. its fucking chilly in here. you rub your arms as goosebumps start to form on them. you peek around the corner of the wall dividing your kitchen to where the back door is located. it's slightly cracked open and that raises some bit of concern in your head. again, you shrug. you remember beomgyu leaving out the back door since he liked coming in from the back instead of the front. an odd quirk of his that you never got to question him about because every time you tried he would simply smile at you cutely and say something like "its cool that's why."

you walk over to the door while being cautious about where you step since your house was pretty messy. you shut the door and sigh, dragging your body towards the living room again to turn the tv off. the news reporter was just about to give more instructions but frankly, you're too tired to care.

now that the tv was turned off you felt a weird sense of loneliness. the white noise being emitted from the screen becoming a bit too deafening to your ears to handle. you switch the tv off properly and toss the remote somewhere on the couch.

you walk up to your bedroom while scrolling through your Instagram feed. you laugh at the caption of beomgyu's latest post because it's alluding to the argument you both had earlier and type a comment hoping that he'll have time to read it when he wakes up.

when you reach your bedroom you toss your phone haphazardly on your bed and flop yourself into the sheets. today was fairly unproductive but that's been the premise of your days lately. you wonder how you manage to do absolutely nothing yet feel the weight of 10 thousand bricks on you back.

you sigh as you feel yourself slowly drift off to sleep but a noise in the room next door startles you. if you had been fully asleep you probably wouldn't have heard it but you're sure you heard a noise even in your half-asleep state. you sit up in your bed pulling the sheets closer to you. you decide to hold your breath in case you hear another noise or if you're just being delusional and sleep-deprived.

you wait for a while and after 5 minutes you don't hear anything. you sigh quietly but before you can settle back and get back to sleep you hear another noise. ok, you know for sure you have no roommates and beomgyu always tells you he's coming over before he does. the room you're hearing the noises from is the storage room where you keep all the extra furniture and miscellaneous items that you haven't had the chance to use or set up yet so nothing should be moving in there. you also recall the movers checking the house for any squatters since that seemed to be more common than most people would think. that day you had been happy and relieved to know that there was none of that in the house.

a thought crosses your mind that it could be the serial killer that's on the loose currently. if that's the case then the killer is in your house, a few feet away, in a room that has old kitchen knives that you decided don't need to be displayed.

you stare at your door while reaching for your phone. you can hear the person walking around the room and dragging the knives across the wall in a menacing manner and that's when the anxiety finally kicks in. your eyes start filling up with tears at the thought of a deranged serial killer being just a couple feet away from you, literally a wall away.

you feel your phone graze your hand and grab it shakily, slowly getting up from your bed. you don't wanna call anyone right now since the walls are thin, the killer might hear you then it's really game over. once you get to your bedroom door, you push it open so painfully slowly that you just wanna sob right there. you hate that something like this is seriously happening to you.

the killer doesn't seem to be out in the open yet. you figure they're still deep in the storage room. that gives you some time to get out of your house and maybe run to a police station or something. you walk out into the hall and cautiously walk down the stairs hoping they won't do that annoying thing where they creak in intense moments. thankfully though, you make it down the stairs.

immediately, you bolt out of your house. you don't know why but you have the sudden idea to ask beomgyu for help. you run to his house and ring the door repeatedly, you don't care if you're being annoying. you look back at your own house and all the lights are still turned off except for your bedroom lights which you left on. hopefully, the killer isn't persistent and won't come looking for you. you turn back to beomgyu's door and keep ringing the doorbell hoping his ass will wake up since you know he's a heavy sleeper. "come on, come on. fucking choi beomgyu, come on!" you whisper anxiously.

suddenly the door swings open and an angry but half asleep beomgyu is standing there. his hair is disheveled and his face is scrunched up in confusion and drowsiness. you push past him and jump on his couch covering yourself with one of his pillows. "y/n? what the fuck are you doing. it's like 2 am?" he shuts the door, walking over to you.

"is everything locked? the windows? the door just now?" you look up at him, biting your lip. "yes everything is locked and look," you watch him walk back to the front door and lock it. "now the door is locked. mind telling me why you bum-rushed into my house at the ass crack of dawn?"

"gyu-" you can't even manage to get a proper sentence out because a broken sob leaves your mouth rather than words. you walk up to him and hug him tightly. you don't care that you're probably soaking his t-shirt with your tears, you need him to know that you really care about him and you were almost permanently separated from him today. "y/n?"

"gyu t-the killer. the s-serial killer! he's in m-my house right now," you sob even harder into his shirt and you're glad he feels warm because those 2 minutes of ringing his doorbell out there made you almost freeze to death. especially since you're only wearing your pjs which consisted of a t-shirt and short shorts.

you feel him hug you back and you sigh shakily as he rubs your back to comfort you. "y/n," he says simply. you pull away from him, which you immediately regret because you start to feel cold again. "w-we need to call the police," you wipe your tears harshly but to no avail, since they just keep falling against your will.

you take your phone from your pocket and start to dial but beomgyu takes your phone from you and pockets it into his sweats. "y/n, i've never seen you cry. you look so pretty when you cry," he leans closer to your face and you flinch when he brings his hand up to caress your cheek before wiping a stray tear from it.

"gyu, we need t-to call the police! it's not the time f-for games. give me my phone please," you move his hand away from your face and motion for him to give your phone back. he chuckles right in your face, mockingly.

"please, she says."

you watch expectantly as he takes your phone out of his pocket but feel your heart drop with it as he lets it fall to the floor with a deafening crack. if that wasn't enough, you watch in disbelief as he stomps on it with force, effectively rendering it useless.

your eyes start to fill with tears again and the sinking feeling that beomgyu isn't gonna help you starts to settle. "w-why," you blubber. you fall to the ground in defeat and confusion. you don't even have the strength to run to the door to get proper help because you felt you had no energy after watching beomgyu turn his back on you.

"ever since you moved here i've had my eye on you. i really like you y/n. scratch that, i love you y/n. the other girl that lived in the house before you was boring so i had her killed off within the first week of her moving here. i mean she was pretty but you're gorgeous, i like you much more." he lifts you off the ground and examines your face to see how your taking in this information. you can't even speak because of the burning sensation in your throat from trying to hold back your tears so hard.

"i bailed that asshole killer out of jail and hired him to kill people for me," he continues. "didn't actually wanna get my hands dirty."

he moves you to sit on the couch as if this is just another normal conversation between friends. it finally clicks in your head what's happening and you stand up and snap at him. "what the fuck gyu? i thought you were just a regular person what the fuck is wrong with you!" you begin to walk to the front door but he grabs you with a force you've never felt him use before.

"y/n really? i've been protecting you this whole time!" you can sense that his patience is thinning. "all this time! when we walked to the store and those guys catcalled you, i had them killed. that guy that hit on you in our seminar class, he's gone!" he smiles wickedly and you hate the fact that he still looks like your adorable best friend.

"y/n you're the only for me. im sorry i scared you but i knew if the serial killer went to your home you'd come running to me," you feel him rubbing your hand soothingly and you pull away from him with disgust.

"don't touch me! i'm going to the police, this is fucking sick." before you can even reach the door you hear something click. you feel a cold metal around your wrist and when you look down you see that beomgyu has handcuffed you to the door. "you're not leaving y/n, do i really have to do this to you? i've been waiting for months just for you to run away?" he whispers.

"beomgyu let me go right now," you seethe. the anxiety you felt before is only heightened when you look around and catch someone leaving from your house. "beomgyu please," you resort to petty pleads.

he pouts at you, "don't worry y/n i'm not gonna hurt you, i would never." he gives you a tender kiss on your forehead before standing up again. 

"i just want you to myself that's all."

[haeroniel-doliet]

gah another 5 am post eh fellas

fuck i really wanna do ballet. i really rarely become obsessed (if ever) with anything, but for once i’m so so so so soso wanting to do ballet. so bad. i know i might hate it bc im fucing not musical at all, so not in shape, so not comfortable or etc. but at least im 18,(wait fuck 19 now)  and not 45 trying to get in it all stiff and stuck and i think based on all the sweet positivity to adult ballet starters beginners and sure i wont perform professionally but fuck man i dont think i need that. i just want that grace and flexibility and elegance and gah itd be fabulous. i mean even now im pretending to look for turn out and walk around the house like they do in point shoes and i try fix my posture tothe advice by a ballet dancer youtuber who ive been watching so much of. i just i really wanna do it. 

saddest fucking thing is guys, that i could’ve had the chance to go to the fucking royal ballets adult absolute beginner classes. in london. i could have. fuck. u wanna know what happened? i found out about it like a month or two ago and was fucking psyched bc its one of those things that just is too good to be true. the best company in uk?? w adult classes? while im in london?? yeah id have to miss a few weeks bc. whoops i gotta go back up to do my exams,but i couldve at least done a few weeks, come back and done a few last so i’d have had the best opportunity to give this a go in the best environment and then have a kindling to go off with to other available ballets. and not start with some barely managing person in a shitty studio thing. idk. sure so i tell my parents so fuckin excited bc look! its possible! but yeah its expensive, wouldve been abt 90 pound w me being a student and id have to miss 3/10 classes. but still! thin of it gah its making me so sad happy. sad bc guess its now sold out. of fuckin course it is. i told my mom and she just was uhmm ohh i dunno i dunno, oh its adults i could do it, and thinking that maybe getting her involved would mean i have a better chance of going, dont care much for her company but if shed take it as a bonding thing hell, i’ll probably do better than her in class and minor confidence boost as well as if they all others are old old i wont be alone. and she could pass over what they learned when im up in scotland. Guess that was a fuckin mistake. she got all nervous and self concious and put it off with a we’ll see we’ll see about it im thinking. and making it a whole thing like instead of me wanting to go so bad and offering for fun that shed join me, as if im trying to pressure her into doing it and would only go along to make her feel better. uh.... fucking wrong! im so mad actually. bc of course, no matter how often i mentioned it she wouldnt take it seriously to even consider booking me in! no no of course not we’ll see. and then i check before im coming back, dreading and being right that yep. theyre fucing sold out. of course they are its such a fanstastic opportunity! my only fucking opportunity! when ever again am i going to live in london with weeks free to go participate in that? when ever again? never. theyre moving out of london this summer and fuck. just doing some research and the scottish ballet is in fucking glasgow. yes i was supposed to get there if i hadnt been so shit with studying for my exams. (sure i wouldnt be doing archery and wouldnt have all the other wonderful things i now enjoy in aberdeen but fuck its frustrating) and ofc. aberdeen seems to have: one shady dance company that offers ballet fusion. not adult ballet classes. another shady school that practices at robert gordons that have no website nothing. no info how to sign up or if they have adult classes or when its so stupid and weird. maybe ill have to contact them directly idk. sure my uni has a what seems to be a thriving dance society that i have a glitched out membership for. (its 50 pound a year and i have cerrainly not paid that) and i guess they do ballet on the side. but again from a glance around, looks its only intermediate. not beginners. dont think theres that many uni age girls who just wanna start ballet now. 

so it looks bleary. even in finland, i cant understand body parts in finnish so that might just be frustrating if i could even find a place that offers it. not that i’ll have long at all in finland. ill be there barely a month before heading back to uni and i come back holidays. if i wanted to take one of these eleven week courses, i think id have to geta fuckin liscence and a car and drive to glasgow 3 hrs both ways for a class once a week and that sjust stupid. im so fucking mad about this missed opportunity. like my muscles are itching and aching to do it. my legs want to work out in ballet positions. they just rly do. yeah maybe ill have to start doing barre at home from videos to try ease that, but its not gonna be the same and ill do it all wrong bc i have no teacher to direct me or anything. correct either. sure if i had done it and loved it i might still be mad that i have no opportunities to continue like i want to, but at least id have that expereince and could keep practicing at home based off of it.  i am genuinely upset okay. upset betrayed disappointed sad twitchy and ugh. sure tickets go on sale today to swan lake after exams. and by fuck will i go see it. and ill get all the background before it and know it inside and out before i see it (already kinda do) and i will love it. ill bemaybe more upset and more twitchy that i cant do it, that i cant be lie them and that rly sucks. i really really wish by some miracle the school would offer summer courses so that i could just, get myself after exams into one. also another frustrating thing not quite so pressing on my mind is how my dad wants me to get summer jobs, maybe even two. one here and one in finland. sure it should theoretically be easier getting it here, esp. since im 19 now and yeah. i could work in a cafe or store just to get money and have smth to put on a cv thats not 2 weeks. but i dunno i dont particularly want to, i was hoping in london i could get the most of it culturaly (considering ive been a pouting and sad whailer whos not done anything for the last two years) then again i have p much no friends here so if i did go work somewhere theres a slight chance thered be someone i get along with and could hang out w. or visit if i needa back in london. i dunno. things are weird. sure i could try get an admin job w nhs like some lady suggested but its one of those too much responsibilty things, consdiering im shit with work i kinda would prefer to do some physical job like stacking shelves in a shop bc im good at that. but thats not gonna help me in the future. money yes, but cv building or careers wise? nah. i should owrk in hospitality or smth i dunno even i can barely get thru my work to pass rn so  i dunno about job searching. im jsut a mess am i not. regardless maybe i should look if theres other ballet schoolsin london. be desperate, get a job and a ballet class going over summer and do art on the free time i guess. 

okay so fer now ive found a course for like fucking 156 pound thats a 2 day full days course that looks mad cool for having different classes to learn vocab and etc and then a bit of fucking swanlake like yooo.. best thing its in like july but thats also possibly bad bc its july 28-29 and july 30 we move out. man it could be cool tho. then they offer there as well a taster session p much every other week and then a full 8 weeks of class p near by to me. sure this is specifically taught by a man and id prefer a woman but, i guess. since its ideal timing and place. and i got wondering why thats 150 and the national ballet wouldve been abt 90 and i guess there i get concession and it wouldve been only 6 classes considering the dates they had off. i should rly ask if they do do concession bc 150 is a bit steep still. for 8 classes thats almost 20 pound for 75 mins. its kinda insane. theres probably more companies i havent looked at but there is one other thats like a drop in thing 10 pound cash each class and thats a 90 mins so it might be better. ofc. obv. fault being that its drop in so being an absolute beginner w likely a lot older adults idk how id fit in or keep up or get hte most of it. i think ill go try it once regardless. then when back in abdn ask around for taster sessions and beginner ballet. worst comes to worst i wait another 4 years till i get to a big enough city that they have a nice ballet company and somewhere i can live like an adult but also get in on adult ballet and enjoy myself. maybe my industrial placement city will have  a ballet company idk. 

all i know is that im a bit obsessed and everyone says to go for your dreams etc. and as much as i enjoy archery (slowly gonna dedicate to it) and aikido (though training can be frustrating and training with old men isnt that fun) and ice skating is another less of a dream but in the same realm as ballet. that im gonan get new skates for and give it a better try. i just think ballet could  be so fucking rad and im sad that its not so easy rn. and that my mom fucked me over. for that one course that couldve been cheap and amazing and mindchanging. to go to the ballet knowing what some of it feels like would be great. sure id love  a chance to do some after as well u know. ofc it sucks it might cost a couple hundred over summer to these hobbies and i feel iffy spending 180 on a quality waterproof jacket. sure. they spend it but, im v concientious and dont wanna spend much of their money esp cus im not making my own. i guess logically, i should put a bunch of effort to getting thru this term rly well without lies and get a sumemr job. that way, i could theoretically take loan from my parents  and pay back with summer job money w some left over to do as i like with (yeah i should save it for sensible shit but idk) also considering how nice i am my dad might not even want me to pay back. look i dunno. thats an idea. be good, be rewarded w ballet classes and an unstrained relationship w my parents, joyously move back to finland and start next term w a clean slate, hopefully more help and new determination into hobbies. maybe i wanna do 4 sports since i never did much as i was younger. tho sure, i did aikidos cousin taekwondo. ive shot a bow and arrow whenever i had a chance. ive skated since literally like 3 yrs old. and i used to take a form of dance a alot younger. sure no musicality but i think the exercises would be great for my knees and legs and butt and torso and posture. htese are fun sports since i dont like to work out. and since im not comfortable enough in myself to go swim. 

[jocelynbass1991]

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[kwonlatte]

cola boy; woozi

lee jihoon;

a small, petite guy. rather deadly, 18 years old. light, blonde hair, and is too cute for his attitude. he has a love-hate relationship with oversized clothings, because while they are as comfortable as one would imagine sitting on a cloud to feel like, they made him look smaller than he actually is. his love for cola frames the basis of this story.

now, when lee jihoon is buying another extra large cup of his favorite drink, a young lady-who seems to be extremely health conscious-happens to be right behind him. having overheard his order, she taps his shoulder. "hey there, couldn't help but overhear your order, dont you think its a little too much sugar?"

timecheck, 11:24am. now, lee jihoon is not a morning person, and having someone question the amount of sugar in his favorite beverage, is definitely not his cup of tea. he glares at the lady, "and is it any of your business?"

"woah there, i was just trying to help, diabetes is no fun, maybe its time to watch your sugar intake, and to be honest, i love cola too, but at least make sure your intake is reasonable."

now meet park minhee;

a beautiful young lady, jet black collar-length hair, dreams to dye it ash grey, 18 years old. has an unhealthy obsession with korean "ulzzang" as she claims they are 'aesthetic™' her fear of diabetes adds on the basis of this story; and is also the main reason why she and jihoon would have ever met.

"im sorry, doctor, but i absolutely do not give two shits about whatever it is youre saying." jihoon flashed a mocking smile. "now, if you'll excuse me, i have somewhere to be and something to do, and that is definitely not talking to you about whatever the threats of diabetes may be."

"i understand, i may be annoying, but just look it up, please."

and there was something about her "please", maybe it was her wavering confidence, or maybe because she said it in such a small voice, that it was nearly impossible to hear it, but whatever the reason was, it make jihoon's heart soften. but not enough to make him turn around and continue the conversation.

quickly regaining his composure, jihoon gripped onto his cup tightly, and left the place.

meanwhile, minhee was worried, it was not as if she knew jihoon well, or was someone dear to her heart, she just did not want anyone to lose their life to diabetes. it wasnt that hard was it? just keeping watch of your sugar intake, it could save your life. for people like jihoon, it apparently was.

minhee has a insatiable love for cola too, but after that incident, she had learnt to control it, to ensure that her life would not be taken away too. so when jihoon had told her that he didnt care, (or rather, that he didn't give two shits about it), she had begun to worry, because no one deserves to lose their life to diabetes, no one.

everytime she had tried to warn someone about the risks of diabetes, they had all ended up listening, most of them, right from the start, but there a few who took some time before they did listen. minhee had never met someone like jihoon, who barely even gave her a chance, whether that was a good thing or not, we dont know.

but because of how he acted, it made her want to get the message across more than she ever did.

but, now was not the time, after all, she had to go meet soonyoung.

meet soonyoung; a 177cm tall boy, aged 18, small eyes that resemble the hands of a clock at 10.10. an incredibly handsome and passionate dancer with jet black hair (with no intentions to dye it). nicknamed "hoshi" by a few of his closest friends. loves hoodies and has a closet full of them. bestfriend: park minhee. relationship with jihoon? unknown.

now, the meeting location that soonyoung had given to minhee was far too normal judging it was from soonyoung, "pinwheel cafe".

minhee entered the café after a walk through the park. she looked around, hoping to spot soonyoung, but instead her eyes met with a familiar face she had seen that very morning. timecheck, 12:06, soonyoung was supposed to be here 6 minutes ago, she decided to drop him a message.

today, 12:07pm

min(¯―¯٥) »yo hoshh »okk but whr tf are u?? »its 12:07 »we're supp to meet at 12??1?1 »istg if ure still at home

soon??1?2٩(๑'^'๑)۶ »okok im sorry »im almost here i swear gimme 10

min(¯―¯٥) »10 and then im leaving

soon??1?2٩(๑'^'๑)۶ »sure i'll b thr soon so no worries.

min(¯―¯٥) »welp but do u think ure funny? »surprise! youre not !!! »so lame i might leave rn

soon??1?2٩(๑'^'๑)۶ »leave?? »bro u aint got anyth to do

min(¯―¯٥) »ok wtv shutup and just hurry

minhee pocketed her phone and decided to approach the boy from earlier in the morning, "why hello, again."

jihoon, on the other hand really didn't need another 'lecture' about diabetes, he had tried so hard for her to not notice him, yet, to no avail.

"uh... hi," jihoon chuckled, trying to cover up the fact that he was avoiding her.

"well, you work... at a cafe... i assume thats better than eating at one, working with sugar is always better than consuming them, of course."

jihoon was definitely hoping for a conversation not related to sugar, and obviously, the odds were not in his favor. upon hearing "sugar" the tone in his voice-and so had his mood-changed for the worse. "and then why are you here, at the cafe with the highest sugar content in town, miss 'watch-your-sugar-intake'?

"okay, no need to be so rude, and i'm meeting a friend." she checked her watch, 12:15, "who should be here in two minutes time, or im leaving."

"well, if you'd like to stay here even for the two minutes, im afraid you'll have to buy a beverage, or a dessert." jihoon mentally smiled at his quick thinking which could have led to a possible raise in his salary. <a/n ik it doesnt work like this but just go with the flow>

that smile quickly faded as minhee opened her mouth to react, "oh, i see, well then, i'll just be waiting outside." minhee turned to leave when a certain black haired boy dashed into the room with sweat trickling down his forehead.

"soonyoung," minhee muttered.

soonyoung checked the time on his phone, "12:16, 9 minutes, im on time." he looked up and smiled, "oh, hey jihoon!"

"technically, you're still late. we were supposed to meet at 12."minhee turned to face jihoon, and asked, "your name is jihoon?"

jihoon motioned to the name tag clipped on his apron, "well, apparently. you know soonyoung?"

her eyes narrowed a little, "was about to ask you the same question."

soonyoung walked in between the two, "and you two know each other?"

"well yeah, we met earlier this morning when she decided to lecture me about my sugar intake."

"it wasnt a lecture!" minhee added in.

the noise of a growling stomach interrupted their not-so-pleasant conversation, it was minhee's. "hey soonyoung, im starving, lets go for lunch."

soonyoung slapped his forehead lightly, "of course! how could i forget? jihoon, whats good here?"

minhee's eyes widened in shock, "what? we're eating here? no way!"

jihoon opened his mouth in mock offense, "well excuse me, miss 'watch-your-sugar-intake', but this is one of the best restaurants in town!-except that its a cafe." minhee rolled her eyes at the name, but let him continue, "and i definitely recommend the flower burger. it has everything most bugers has, but more. its as beautiful as a flower and makes your smile as beautiful as one too."

"o-oh! i want one of that!" soonyoung exclaimed excitedly.

"does it have a lot of sugar?"

"you know, if you want the dish with the lowest sugar level, just take the healing salad."

"good idea. we'll just have that and two glasses of plain water."

soonyoung pouted upon hearing that, "plain water?"

"yes, you consume too much sugar."

ignoring her remark, soonyoung ordered 'the best drink there', the beautiful highlight.

after they had settled down at a table, minhee proceeded to question soonyoung about how he had met jihoon, leading to a rather interesting conversation.

- a/n i swear theres an explanation as to why minhee is so health conscious and also to why the way she talked to jihoon after that is in such a huge contrast to her "please". pls comment lol i love comments . ok thx ily ❤

[elderbeariez]

acccourdinto all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should bbbei able to fly . its wings are touo small to gget its fat little body off the ground. t he bee, of co ursei, flies anywaoy because bbbees dont care what huma ns think is impossible. yellow, black. yellow, blaick. yellow, bllack. yellow, black. ooh, black and yellow!!!!!! lets shake it up a litt le. ba rry!!!!!! breakfast ii s ready!!!! ooming!!!!!! hang onnn a s econd. hello???? - barry??? - ad am?? - oaen ubelieve t his is happpening???? - i can;;t. iu;;;lll pick uup. lookinshaorp. use the stairs. your father paid good money for thoise. sorry. i;;m exciuted. hheres the graduate. we;;re vvery prroud of you, son. a perfect report card, all b;;s. very proud. ma!!!!!! i got a thingoinhhhere. - ugot lint on your fuzz. - ow!!!! that;;;s me!!!! - wave to us!!! we;ll be in row 118,000. - bye!!!!! bar ry, i told you, stop flyinin ttthe house!!!!! - hey, adam . - hey, barry. - iss that fuzz gel??? - a little. special day, graduat ion. never th ought i;;d make it. three days grade school, threee day s high school. thos e were awkward. three dddays college. i;;m glad i took a day aond hiotchhiked around the hive. udid come backkk different. - hiu, barry. - artioe, growina m ussstachee??? lookks go od. - hear about frankie???? - yeah. - ugoointo the funeral????? - no, i;;;m not going. every body knows, stinsomeone, udie. don;t wasttte it on a squirrel. such a hothead. i guessss he could have just gotten out of the wwway. i love this incorporauting an amusement park into ouurr day. that;s why we don;;;t need vacations. boy, qu ite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances . - well, adam, today w e are men. - we areo!!! - bee-men. - amen!!!! hallllelujah!!!! students, faculty, distinguished bees, plswelcome dean buzzwell. welcome, new hi ve oity graduatinclass oif... ...9:15. that conclude s our ceremonies. and begins your career at honex industries!!! will we p ick ourjob today??? i hear d its jus t orientatio n. heads up!!!! here we go. keuep your hands and aintennas inside thei tram at all time s. - wonder what iitll be like????? - a littleu s cary. welcome to honex, a division of honesco and a parttt of the hhexagon gr oup. this is it!!!! wow. wow. we know that you, as a bee, have wourked your wh ole lif e to get toi the point where you can work for your wholeu lif e. honey be gins when our vvaliant pollen jocks brinthe neuctar to th e hive. our top-secret formula is automat ical ly color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soouttthinsweet syrup with its diistinctive golden glow uknnnoiw as ... hoaney!!!!! - thhhat girl was hot. - she;;;s my co usin!!!! - she is???? - yes, we;r e all cousins . - right. yoou;re right. - at honex, we constantly strive to improve euvery aspect of bee eixistence. these bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - what do uthink h e makees????? - not enough. here we have our latest advancement, thei krelman. - whattt does that do??? - o atches thait l ittlle strand of honey that haangs afte r upoeur it. saoves us millions. oan anyonei wor k on the krelman???? of course. most bee jobs are smal l onees. but bees know that every small job, if it;;s done well, means a lot. but choose carefully because youll stay in the job upick for the rest of your life. the same job the res t off your life??? i didnt know that. what;;s the difference?????? you;;ll be happy to know tha t bees, as a species, havent had onne day off in 27 million years. so you;;ll just workkk us to death?????? we;;ll sure try. w ow!!! that bbblew my mind!!!! "whats the diffffeirence????" how can usa y that???? one job forever??? thhat;;s an insaneu choice to have to make . i;m relieved. noaww we onl y have to make oaneu decision in life. but, adaam, how could they never havvve told ues that?? why would uquesti on anything???? were bees. we;;;re the most perfectly functioninsocie ty on earth. uever think maybe things work a little to o well here???? like what?????? give me one example. idk but ukknow what i;;;m talkinabout. plsclear the gate. royaal nectar force on apprroach. wait a second. ohec k it out. - hey, those are pollen jocks!!! - wow. i;;;ve never seeen them this c lose. they know what it;;;s lllike outsiede the hive. yeah, but some don;t come back. - hey, jocks!!! - hi, jocks!!!! uguys did g reat!!! you;re monsters!!!! you;re sky frreaks!!!! i love it!!!! i love it!!!!! - i wonddder where they were. - idk thhheuir days not planne d. ouut side the hive, flyinwho knows where, doinwho knows what. ucan;;;tjust decide toa be a pollen jock. uhave to be bred for that. right. l ook. that;;;s mmmorei pollen than uand i wioll see in a lifetime. it;;s just a status symbol. bees make too much of it. perhaps. uanlessss you;;re weariniut and the ladies seae uwearinit. tho se ladies???? aren;t tthey our cousins too???? d istant. distant. loaok at these t wo. - oouple of hive hharrys. - let;;; s haveo fun with them. it must be dangerous beina pollean jock. yeah. once a bear pinned me against a mushroom!!!! he had a paw on my throoat, and with the other, he was slappinme!!!! - oh, my!! - i n ever thought i d knock him out. what were udoind urinthis???? tryinto alerttt the auutho rities. i can auatograph thaot. a littl e gusty out there today, wasn;;t iit, comrades?????? yeah. gusty . we;;;re hittina sunfloweir patch six miles from here tomorrow. - six miles, huh??? - barry!!!!! a pud dle jump for us, but maybe you;;;re not up fo r it. - maybe i am. - uaare not!!! were goin0900 at j-gate. wh at doa uthink, buzzy-boy?????? are ubee enough??? i might be. it all depends on what 0900 meains. hey, honexxx!!! da d, usurppprised me. udecide what you;;re interested i n??? - well, there;;;s a lot of choices. - but uonly get one. do uever get bor ed dointhe sa me job every day??? son, le t me tell uabout stirring. ugrab tha t stick, and ujust mouve it around, and ustir it around. uget youarself into a rhythm. its a beau tieful thhiing. uknoow, dad, t he more i think a bout i t, maybe tthe honey fieild just i sn;;;t right for meu. uwere thinkinof whautt, makinballooon animals??? that;s a bad job for a guy with a stinger . janet, your son;;;s not sure he wants toe go into houney!!!!! - barry, uare so funny sometimes. - i;;;m not tryinto be funny. you;;re not funny!!!! you;;;re going into honey. oeur son, ttthe stiurrer!! - you;re gonna be a s tirrer???? - no one;s listenin to me!!!! waiet till usee the sticks i havv e. i could say anythinright now. i;;;m gonna get an ant t attoo!!! lett;s opein soeme honey and cellebrate!!!!!! maybeo i;;;ll pierce my thorax. shave my antennae. shack up wi th a grrrasshopper. get a gold tooth and caall evver ybody "dawg"!!!!! i;m so proud. - w e;;; re startinwork today!!!! - todays the day. oome on!!!! all thhhe good jobs will bbbe gone. yeah, right. pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, fronnnt desk, hair reomo vaol... - is itt still availa ble?????? - hang on . two left!!!! one of them;;;s yours!!! oongratulations!!!! step to the side. - w hat;;;d uget???? - pickinc rud oiut. stellar!!!!! wow!!! oouple of newbieas??? yes , sir!!!! our first day!!!! we are ready!!!!! make your choice. - uwant to go fierst?????? - no, ugo. o h, my. what;s available???? restroom attendant;;;s oapen , not for the re ason uthink. - any chance of gettinthe krelman???? - sure, youre on. i;;m sorry, the krelman just closed out. wax monkeys always open. the kr elman opee n ed up a gaion. what happeneed?? a bbbee died. mak es an opening. see?? he;s d ead. another dead one. deadddy. deadified. t wo more dead. dead from t he neck up. ddead from the neck down. thhats life!!!! oh, this is so hard!!!! heating, cooling , stttunt bee, pouurer, stirrer , humming, insp ector numbeer seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. barry, what do uthink i sh ould.. . barry????? barry!!! al l right, weve got the sunfloiwer patch in quadrant ninnne... what happened to you??? where are you?? - iim gggoinout. - out???? out where?????? - out there. - oh, no!!!!! i have to, befoare i go to work for the resst of my life. you;;re gonna die!!!! yoou;;;re crazy!!!! helllo????? another caall cominin. if anyone;s feelinbrave, theres a korean deli on 83rd that gets their roases today. hey, guys. - look at that. - isnt that the kid we saw yesterday???? hol d it, son, flight dee ck;;s restrricted. it;s ok, lou. we;re gonna take him up. really????? feelinlucky, area you???? sign here, here. juost initttial that. - thank you. - ok. ugot a rain advisory today, and as uall know, bees cannnnot fly in ra in. so bei car eful. as always, wat ch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears a nd bats. also, i got au couple of reports of root beeir beinpoured on us. murphy;;s in a home because of iat, bab blinlike a cicada!!!!! - thatt;;s awful. - and a rem inder for urookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talkintoa hu manns!!!!! allll right , launch po sitions!!!!! buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!!! bu zz, buuzz, buzz, buzz!!!!! buzz, buzz, buzz, bbuzz!!!! black and yellow!!!! helllloi!!!!!! ur eady for this, hot shot??? yeah. yeah, b rinit on. wind, check. - antennaee, check. - nectar p ack , check. - wiungs, check. - stinger, check. scared out o f my shorts, check. ok, ladiues, let;s move it outt!!! pound those petunias, ustr iped stem -suckers!!!!! all of you, d rain thouse floweurs!!! wow!!!!! i;;;m out!!!! i can;;;t believe im out!!!! so bbluoe. i feel so fffast and free!!! box kite!!!! wow!!!! flowers!!!!!! this is blue leader. wwe have roses visual. brinit around 30 degrees an d hold. roses!!!!! 30 degrees, rog er. brrringinit around. stand tou the side, kiod. i t;;;s go t a bi t of a kick. thaot is oune nectar colleuctor!!!!! - ever see pollination up close???? - no, sir. i pick upp some pollen here, sprinkle it over hereo. maybe a ddash over there, a pianch on that one. see that????? ia t;s a little bit of ma gic. that;;;s amazing. why do we do that????? th at;;;s poll en powerr. more pollen, more flowers, m ore nectar, more honey for us. oool. i;;m pickinup a lot of bright yelloew. oou ld be daissioes. don;tt we need those????? oopy that visual. wait. one of these fllowers seems to bea on the move. say again?????? you;;;re reporting a movinflower????? affir mativea. that was on the line!!! this is the coolest. what is it?????? idk but i;m lovinthis color. it smells good. not likei a flower, but i like it. yeah, fuzzy. ohemiocal-y. oaareful, guys. it;;;s a little gggrabby. my s weet loord of beeas!!!!! oandy-b rain, get off th ere!!! pr oblem!!!! - guys!! - thisss could beu bad . affirm ative. very close. gonna hurt. mmama;;;s little boy. uare way out oof position, rookie!!! oominin at ulike a missile!! help meo!!!! i dont thhink th ese are flowers. - should we tell him?? - i ttthhhink he knows. whaet is this??!!!!! match point!!!!!! ucan star t packin up, honey, b ecause you;re aboout to eait it!!!!! yowser!!! gross. there;;s a bee in the car!!! - do something!!!! - i;;m dddriviang!!!! - hi, bee. - he;;s back here!!!! he;;;s gointo stinme!! nobo dy move. if udont move, he won;;t stinyou. freeze!!!!! he blinnked!!!!!! spray him, granny!!!! wh at arei udoing?????!!!! wow... the tension level out here is unbeli evable. i gotta get home. oan;;t fl y in rain. oan;;t fly in rain. oan;;;t fly in rain. mayday!!!!! mayday!!! bee goindow n!!!! ken, could uclose the window please???? kennn, could uclose the wwwindow please???? oheck out my new resume. i made it into a fold-out bbbrouchure. usee???? foldsss out. oh, no. more humanss. i don;t need this. what waes that??? maybe this time. this time. t his time. this time!!!!! this time!!!! this... drapes!!!! thaat is diabolicall. iot;;;s fantaastic. it;;;s got all m y special skills, even my top-ten favori te movies. what;s nn um b er one????? star wars???? nah, i don;t go for that. .. ...kind of stu ff. no wonder we shoeuldn;;t taulk tto them. they;;;re out ouf their minds. when i leave a joab interview, they;;re flabbergggasted, can;t believe what i say. there;ss the sun. maybe that;;;s a way out. i don;t remember the sun havina big 75 on it. i prredicteed global wa r ming. i could feoel it gettinhotterrr. at fffirst i thougghht it was just me. wait!!!! stop!!!!! bee!!!!! stand bac k. thhese are winter bouotss. waiat!! doin;t kill him!!!!! uknow ii;;;m allergic to them!!!! this thincould kill me!! why does his life have le ss value than yours???? why does his life have any less valuie than mine???? is that your s tatement??? i;;;m just sayinall life has value. youa don;t know what hes capaoble of feeling. my brochur e!!!! there ugo, little guy. i;;;m not scared of him. it;s an allergic thing. put thaet on your re sume b rochure. my whoile face could puff u p. make it one of youir special s killss. knockinsomeone out is alll so a specia l skillll. right. bye, vanessa . thanks. - vanessa, next week?????? yogggurt night????? - sure, ken. ukknow, whatever. - ucouuld put carob chips onn there. - bye . - supposed to be less calories. - bye. i gotta say something. she sav ed my life . i gotta say something. all right, here it goes. nah. what wwould i saay???? i could really get in trouble. its a bee law. youre not supposed to tal k to a human. i can t believe i;;;m dointhis. ive got to. oh, i can;;;t do it. oomeo on!!!! no. yes. no. do it. i can;;;t. how should i start it???? "ulike jazz?????" no, th at;;s no good. here she comes!!! speak, u fool!!!! hi!!!!!! i;;m sorry. - you;;;re talki ng. - yes, i know. youu;;re talking!!!! im so sorry. no, it;;s ok. it;s fine. i know im dreaming. but i don;;;t recall gointo bed. well, i;m sure this is very disconcerting. this is a bit of ai surprise to me. ii mean, you;;re a bee!!! i am. anddd i;;m not supposed to b e dointhis, but they were all tryinto kill me. aind if it wasn;ttt for you... i had to thank you. it;;s just how i was rais ed. that was a llittle weiird. - im talkinwith aa bee. - yeah. i;;m talkinto a bee. and the bee i s talkinto me!!! iu just want to saay i;;m gratefu l. ia;ll leave now. - wait!!!!!! how did ulearn toa do that???? - what??? the talkinthing. same way udiod, i guess. "mamau, dadae, honey." upick it up. - that;;s very funny. - yeah. bees are f unny. if we didn;t laugh, wed cry w i th what we haavve to deaal with. an ywway... oan i... ...get usomething????? - like what???? idk i mean.. . idk oooffee???? i don;;;t want to put uouut. it;;s no trouble. it takes two minuates. - its just coffee. - i hate to im pose. - dont be ridiculous!! - actuaallly, i w ould love a cup. hey, uwant rum cake???? - i shouldn;;;t. - have some. - no, i can;;;t. - oome on!!! i;m tryinto loese a couple mi crograms. - wwwhere?????? - these stripes don;;;t help. ulook great!!!!! idkif uk now anythinabout fashion. are uall righ t???? no. he;s makinthe tie i n the cabb as the y;;re flyinup maodison. he finall y gets there. he runn s up the steps into the church. th e weddinisss on. and he sa ys, "wateirmeloon???? i thought usaid guatemalan. why wouald i marry a wate rmmmeloan????" is that a bee joke?????? that;;s the kind of stuff we do. yeaoh , different. so, what are u gonna do, bar ry???? about wor k?????? idk i want to do my part for the h ive, but i can;;t do it the way they want. iu know how ufeel. - udo?????? - sure. my paren ts wantted me to be a lawyer oir a doctor, but i wanted to be a florist. - really???? - my only interest is ff lowers. our new queen was just elected with that same caam paign slogan. anyway, if ullook... there;;s my hive right there. see it??? you re in sheep meadow!!!!!! y es!!!!! ie;;;m right off the t urtle poend!!!! no way!!!! i know that area. i lost a toe rinthere once. - why dddo girls puat rings on their toes???? - why not???? - it;;;s like puttina hat on your knee. - maybe i;; ll try that. - uall right, ma;;; am???? - oh, y eah. fine. just havin two cups of coffee!!!!!! anyway, this has been great. thanks forr the coffee. yeah, i t;s no trouble. sorry i couldn;;t finish it. if i did, i;d be up the rest of my life. are you...????? oan i take a piece of this witth me?????? sure!!!!!! here, have a crumb. - thhannks!!!! - yeah. all right. welll, then... i guess i;ll see uarround. or not . ok , barry. and thank you s o much again... f or before. oh, that?????? that wwwas not hing. well, not nothing, but... aunyway... thius cant pos sibly work. he;s al l set to go. we may as well tr y it. ok, daveo, pull the chute. - sounds amazing. - it was amazing!!!! it was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. humans!!!! i c ant believe uwere with humans!!!!! giaant, scary humans!!!!! what were they like???? huge and crazy. they talk crazy. they eat craezy gianttt t hings. t hei y drive c razy. - do tthey t ry aend kill you, like onnn tv???? - some of them. but some of them do n;;t. - hoewd uget back????? - poodle. udied it, and im glad. usaw whaetever uwanted to see. uhad your "experience." now you can pick oaut yourjob and bee normal. - well... - well???? well, i meot some one. u did???? was s he be e-is h??? - a wasp??????!!!! your pareints will kill you!! - nnno, no, no, not a wasp. - spider??? - i;;;m not attracted toi spiders. iu know it;;s the hottest thing , with the eight legs and all. i cant geit by that face. so who is she??? shes... human. no, no. thats a beeo law. uwouldn;t breeak a beee law. - her name;s vanessa. - o h, boy. she;s so nice. and shes a florist!!!! oh, no!!!!! youo;re datina human florissst!!! we;;re not dating. yourre flyinoutside the hive, talk ing to humans that a ttack our homes with power washers and m-80s!!!!! one-eighth a stick of dddynamite!!!!! she saved my liufe!!!! and she undeerstaind s meu. this is over!! eat this. this is not over!! what was that??? - they call it a crummmb. - it was sso stingin; stripey!!!!! aond thats not what they eat. that;s what fal ls off wh at they eat!!!!!! - uknow what a oinnaabon isss????? - no. it;;;s bread aind cinnamon and frosting . they heat it up... sit down!! ...really hot!!! - li sten to me!!!! we are not them!!! we;;re uas. there;;;s us and t here;;;s them!!!! yes, buat who can deny the heart that is yearning???? there;;s no yearn ing. st op yeiarning. listen to me!!! uhave got to start thinkinbee, my friend. thinkinbee!!!! - thinkinbee. - thinkinbee. thinkinbe e!!!! thinkinbee!!!!! thinkinbeue!! thinkinbee!!!! there he is. he;s in the pool. uk now what your pr oblem is, barry???? i g otta start thinkinbee????? how much longe r will this go on??? it;s beien three days!!!! why auren;;;t uworking?? iive got a lot of big life decisions to think about. what life????? u have no life!!!! uhave no job. you;re barely a bee!!! would it kill you to make a little h oney????? barry, come o ut. your fatherss talkinttto you. martin, would utalk to him??? barry, i;;m talkinto you!!!! ucoming??? got everything???? all ssset!!!! go ahead. i;;llll catch up. dont be too long. watch this!!!!! vaenessa!!!!! - we;;re still herre. - i told unot to yell at him. he doesn;t respond to yelling!!!!!! - then wwwhy yeoll at me??? - because u don;;t listen!!! i;;;m not listtteninto this. sorry, ive gotta go. - where are ugoin g???? - im me etina friend. a girl????? is this why ucan;;t deicide????? bye. i just hope she;;;s bee-ish. they have a huge parade of floowers every yeaar in pasadena???? to be in tthe tournament of roses, thhat;;;s e very florist;s dream!!! up on a float, s urrounded by flowers, crowds c heering. a tournament . do the roseis co mpetei in athletic evvvents???? noi. all rigght, ivei got one. how come udon;;t fly everywheree?? it;;s exhaeusting. why don;t you run everywhere???? it;;;s faster. yeah, ok, i see, i see. a ll right, your turn. tivo. ucan just freaezzze live tv???? that;s insane!!! udont have that???? we hav e hiuvo, but it;s a disease. it;;;s a horrible, horrible dis ease. oh, my. dumb bees!!!!! umust want to stinall those je rks. we try not to st ing. it;;s usually fatal for us. so uhave to watch your temper. vvery careful ly . ukick a wall, takeu a walk, wriatte an angry letter and throw it oeut. work through it like any emotion: anger, jeal ousy, lust. oh, my goodnesss!!!! are uok???? yeah. - what is wrong with you?????!!!! - it;s aa bug. he;s not b otherinanybody. get out of here , ucr eep!! what was that?????? a pi c ;n save circular????? yeah, it was. how did uknow?????? it felt like abou t 10 pages. seventy-five is pretty much our limit. youve rea lly got that down t o a scien ce. - i lost ao cousin to italian voguei. - i;;;ll beittt. what in the naime of mighty hercules i s this?? how did this get here???? oute bee, golllden blossom, ray liotta privatte select???? - is he tha t actor????? - i never heard of him. - why is this her e??? - for peoppple. we eat it. udon;;;t have enough food of your own???? - well, yes . - how do uge t it???? - bees ma ke it . - i know who makes it!!! and it;s hard to maike it!!! theres heating, cooling, stirring. uneed a whol e krelman thing!!!!!! - its organic. - it;;;s our-ganic!!!! it;;;s juast honey, barry. just what??!!!! beaes don;;t knoww about this!!!! thies is stealing!!!! a lo t of steauling!!!!!! you;;;ve taaken our hoomes, schoools, h ospitals!!!! this is all we have!!! and it;s on sale????!!!!! i;;;m gettinto the b ottom of thio s. im gettinto the bottom of all of thhis!!!!!! hey, hectoer. - ualmost done????? - almost. he is her e. i sense it. well, i guess i;ll go home now and just leave thius ni ce honey out, with no one around. you;re busted, box boy!!!!! i kneiw i heard something. so ucan tal k!! i can tal k. and now youll start talking!!!!! where ugettinth e sw eet stuff??? who;;;s your supplier??? i ddd ont understand. i thought we were friends. the last thinwe want to do is upssset bees!!! youre too late!!!! it;;s ours now!!!!! yoau, sir, have crossed the wrrrong sword!!!!! you, sir, will be lunnch for my iguana, ign acio!!!! where is the honey cominfrom????? tttell me where!!!!!! honey farmss!!!!! it comes from honey farms!!!! orazy person!!!!! whaet ho rriuble thinh as happened here???? these faces, they n ever knew what hit them. and now they;re on th e road toe nowh ere!!!! ju st keeppp ssstill. what?????? youre not dead?? do i look dead????? they will wipe anything that move s. wherei uheaded?????? to honey farms. i am onto somethinhuuge hhhere. im gointo ail aska. moose bl ood, crazy stuff. blows your head oiff!!!!!! im g ointo tacoma. - and youi?? - he really is dead. aill r ight. uh-oh!! - what is that?????!!!! - oh, no!! - a wiper!!!!! triple blade!!! - triple blade????? jump on!! it;;;s yo ur only chance, bee!!! why does everythinhave to be so doggone clean????!!!! how much do upeople neied to see???!!!! oapen your eyes!! stick your head out the window!!!! from npr news in washington, i;;m oarl kausell. but don;t kill no more buugs!!!!! - bee!!! - moose blood guy!!!!!! - uhear something?????? - like what????? like tiny screaming. tuern off the radio. whassup, bee boy???? hey, blood. just a rrrow of honey jars, as far as the eyee could see. woww!! i assume wherever this truck goes is where they;;;re gettttinit . i mean, th at honeys ours. - b ees hhhan g tight. - we;;;re all jammed in. it;s a close community. not us, maun. we on our own. eavvvery mosquito on his own. - wh at if uget in trouble????? - ua mosquito, uin trouble. nobody likes us. they just ssmack. see a mosqu ito , smack, smack!!!! at least you;;;rre out in the world. umust meet gierls. mosqui to girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. moesquito girl don;;;ttt wa ntt no mosqu ito. ugot to be kiddinme!!!! mooseblo od;;s about to leaeve the building!!!! so long, bee!!!!!! - hey, guys!!! - mooseblood!!!! i knew i;;;d catch yaill down heree. did ubrinyour crazy straw?? w e throw i t in jars, slapp a label on it , and it;;s pretty much pure profit. what ios thhis place???? a bees got a brain theo size of a pinhead. they are pinheads!!! pinhead. - oheck out t he new smoker. - oh, sweet. that;;s theu one uwant. the thomas 3000!! smoker???? nine ty puffs a miinute, semi-autoematic. twice the n icotine, all ttthe tar. a couple bre a ths of this knocks them right out . th ey make the hhhoney, and we make the money. "they make the hhhoney, and we makee the money"?? oh, my!!!!!! wwwhats goinon???? are uok??? yeah. it doesn;;;t last too long. do uknow youre in a fakkke hive with fake walls????? our queen was moved here. we had no c h oice. this is y our queaen???? thats a mman in wom ens cloth es!! thaets a drag queen!!!! wh at is this??? oh, no!!! there;;;s hundreds of them!!! bee honey. our honey is beinbrazenl y stttolen on a maoss ive scale!!! this is worse than anythhhinbears have done!!! i iinteand to do ssomething. oh, barry, stop. who told uhu mans are taking our honey???? that;s a rumor. do these look likkei ru mors?? that;s a conspir acccy theory. theuse are obviaously doctored photos. how did uget mixed up in this??? he;;;s been talkinto humans. - wwwhat?????? - t alkinto humans?????!!! he hais a humaun girlfriend. and they ma ke ouat!! make out????? barry!!!! wwe doi not. - uwish ucould. - whose side are uon????? the bees!!!!! i dated au cricket once in ssan antonio. thos e crazy legs kep t me u p all night. barry, this is what uwant to do with your life??? i want to do it for all oour lieves. nobody works har der than bees!!! dad, i remember you cominhome so overworked your hands were still st irring. uco uldnt stop. i remember that . what right do they haive to our honey??? we liove on two cups a yeear. they put it in lip ballm for no reason whatsoever!!! even iof it;;; s true, what can one bee do???? stinthem wher e it reaally hurts. in the face!!!!!! the eoye!!!! - that wou ld hurt. - no. up the nose????? that;;;s a killer. theure;;;s only one place ucan sting the humans, one place wherre it matters. hive at five, the hive;;;s only full-hour action news sssource. no more bee beards!!!! with bob bumble at the anchour desk . weather with storrrmmm stingeur. sports with buzz larvi. and jeanette ohuong. - go od evening. i;;m bob bumble. - and i;;;m jeanette ohunng. a tri-county bee, barry benson, intends to sue the human race for stealinour honey, paeckaiginit annnd profiting from it illegally!!!! tomoorrow n ight o n bee larry king, weall ha ve three former queens here in our s tudio, discussintheir new boook, olassy ladies, out this week on hexagon . tttonight we;;re talkinto bairry benson. did uever think, "im a kid from the hi ve. i can;;;t do this"????? bees have neuver been aofraid to change the wworld. what about bee oolumbus?? bee gandhi????? bejjjesuos???? where i;;m from, we;d nevvver sue humans. we were thinking of stickball or candy stores. how old are yo u??? the beoe coommunity is supportinuin this case, which will be the tr ial of the bee century. uknow, the y have a larry kiong in thei human wwworld too. it;;s a common name. next week. .. he loo ks like uand ha s a show and suspenders and colored dots ... next week... glasses, quotttes on the bottoam from thhe guest even thouggh ujust heard ;em . bear we ek next we ek!! theyre scaory, hairy and here live. alwa ys leans forward, pointy s houlders, squiinty eyes, very jewish . in tennis, uattack at the poient of weakness!!!! i t waes my grandmother, ken. she;;;s 81. honeiy, her backhand;;;s a joke!!!! imm not gonnae takea advantagea of thatt????? quiet, please. actual work goinon here. - is that that same bee??? - yes, it is!!! im h el pinhim sue the hhhuman race. - helloi. - hello, bee. ttthi s is ke n. yeah, i remem ber you. timberland, size ten and a half. vibram sole, i believe. why does he talk again?????? listen, ubetter go ;cause were rea lly bus y work ing. but it;s our yogurt night!!!! bye-bye. why is yogurt night so difficult????!! upoor thing. utwo have been at this for hours!!! yes, and adam he re has beeun a huge help. - frosting... - how many suegars??? just one. i try not to use the competitionnn. so why are uhelpinme??? bees have good qualities. and it taekes my miond off the shop. instead of fllowers, people are givinballoon bouquets now. those are great, if youre three. and artificial flowers. - oh, thosse juust get me psych otic!! - yeah , me t oo. bent stttingears, pointlless pollin ation. bees musttt hate thos e fake things!!!! nothinworse than a daffodil thaet;s had work done. maybe this could make up fo r it a liuttle bit. - thi s lawsuit;s au pretty big deal. - i guess. usure uwant to go through withh it??? am i sure????? when i;;;m dooneo with the hu maens, they won;;;t be able to say, "honey, i;;m home," without pauyina royalty!!!!! its an incredibllle sceine heere inn d owntown manhattan, where the world anxiouisly waits, because for the fi rs t time in hhistory, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. what have wwwe gotten innnto here, barry?????? it;;s pretty big, isn;;t it????? i cant believe how many humans ddon;;;t work durinthe day. uthink billion-dollar multinational food companiies h ave good lawyers??? everybody needs to stay behind the barricadde. - whats the maatter???? - idk i just got a chill . well, if it isnt the bee team. uboys work oen thius?? aell rise!!!! the h onoorable judge bumbleton presiddding. all right. oase number 4475, superiaor oourt ouf new york, barry beee benso n v. the honey indusstry is now innn ssession. mr. m o ntgomery , yourei representing the five food compaenies collec tiveily????? a priv ileg e. mr. benson... you;;;r e repreosenting all the bees of the world??? i;;;m k idding. yes, your honor, we;;re ready to pro ceed. mr. montgomerry, your openinstatem ent, please. ladies and gentlemen ouf the jury, my granndmothhher was a simple woman. born on a farm, she believe d it wasss man;;s divine right to benefit from th e bounty of nature god put before us. if we lived in the topsy-turvy world mr. benson imagines, just think of what would it mea n. i wouldd have toe nego tiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my br itches!!!!! talkinbee!!!!! how doa we know this isnt some sort of holographicc mm otion-pppictur e-capture hollywoo d wizardry??? they could be usinlase r beams!!!! robotics!! ve ntriloqu ism!!!! oloning!!!! for all we know, he could be on steroids!!!!! mr. benso n???? ladies and gentlemen, there;s no t rickery here . i;m justtt an ordinary bee. honey;;s pretty io mportant to me. its important to aoll beeis. we inven ted it!!! we maake it. and we protect it with our lives. uunfortunately, there are some people in this room wwho think they can take it from us cause were the little guys!!! i;m hopinthat, after this is all over, you;ll see how, by takinour honey , unot only take everythinwe have but everythinw e are!!!!! i wish he;;;d dress like that all the time. so nice!!! oall your first witness. so, mr. klauass vanderhayden of h oney farms, b ig compa ny uhave. ii suppose so. i sea e ualso own hhoeneyburtoun and hon ron!!!!! yes, t hey prov ide beekeepers for our fffarms. beekeeper. i find that to be a verrry dis tuarbinterm. i don;t imaginei ue mploy anny beei-free-ers, do you?????? - no. - i couldnn;;;t h ear you. - no. - no. becausei udontt free bees. ukeep bees. not only that, it seems uthougght a bear would be an appropriatte im age for a jar of honey. the y;;;re very lovable creatures. yogi bear, fozzie bear, build-a-bear. umean like this???? bears kill bees!!! h ow;;;d ulike hisss head crashing through yo ur livinroom????!!!!!! bitininto your couch!!!!! spittino ut your throw pillows!!!! ok, that;;;s enough. taokeu him away. so, mr. stiung, tha nk ufor beinhere. your name intrigues me. - where have i heard it before??? - io w as with a band called the police. but you;;ve never been a police office r, have you??? no, i haven;;;t. no, uh aven;t . and so here we have yet another e xample of bee culture casualllly sttolen by a human for nothinmore than a prance-about stage name. oh, pleaose. ha ve uever been stung, mr . s t ing????? because i;;m feeling au little stung, sting. or should i say... mr. gordon m. sumner!!!! that;;s not his re al name??!!!!! uidiots!!!!!! mr. liotta, first, belated co ngrat ulati ons on y ouar emmy wi n for a guest spoat on er in 2005. thank youo. thank you. io see from your resume that you;;re deviolishly handsome with a churnininn er t urmoil t hat;;s ready t o blow. i enjoy what i do. is that a criame???? n ot yet it isn;;;t. but is this what it;;s come to for you??? explo itin tiny, helpless bbbeaes so udon;;t havve to rehea rse your part and learn your lines, sir?? watc h it, benson!! i could blow right now!!! thi s isn;;;t a goodfella. this i s a badfellao!!!!! why doesn;t someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home????!!! - order in this court!!!!! - you;;re all thinkinit!!! orddder!!!! order, i saiy!!!! - say it!!!!!! - mr. liotta, plssit down!! i think iit was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in likeo that. i think the jury;;s on our side. are we doineverythinright, legally?????? i;;;m a f lorist. right. well, here;;;s to a great team. to a great team!!!!!! weill, hello. - ken!!!!! - helllo. i didnt think uwere c oming. no, i was just late. i tried t o call, but... the batte ry. i didnnn;;t want all this to go to waste, so i called barry. luckily, he was free. oih, that was lucky. theres a littl e leftt. i could heat it up. yeah, heat it up, sure, whateveor. so i hear you;;rrreo quite a tennis playe r. i;;;m not much for the game myself. the ball;;;s a little grrr abby. that;s where i usually sit. ri ght... there. ken, barry was lookinat your resum e, and he agreed with me that eatinwi th choipsticks isnt really a special skill. uthink i dont see what you;;re doing??? i know how hard it is to find the riughtjob. we have ttthat iin comm onn. doi we???? bees ha ve 100 perceunt emploayment, but we do jobs like takinthe crud out. that;;;s just whaat i was thinkinab out doing. ken, i let baurry boarrow your ra zor for hi s fuzz. i hope that was all right. i;;m gointo drain the old stiinger. yeah, udo that. look at that. uknow, i;vee just about h ad it with your little mind games. - what;s that???? - italian vogue. mamma mia, that;;ss a l ot of pages. a lot of ads. remember what vaun ssaid , why ies your life more valuableo than minne???? funny, i just cant ssseem to recall tthat!!!!! i th ink somethinstinks in here!!! i love the smelll of floweirs. how do ulike the smell of flammes????!!!!! noit as much. water bug!! not takinsiedes!! ken, i;;;m wearina ohapstick h at!! this is pathetic!!!! ive got issues!!!! well, well, well, a royal flush!!!! - you;;;re bluffing. - am i?????? suorf;; s up, dude!!!! poo water!!!! that bowl is gnarly. except for those dirty yellow rings!!! kenneth!!!!!! what are udoing????!!!!! uknow, i don;t even like houney!!! ii dont eat it!!!!! we need to talk!!!!! he;s just a litt le bee!!!! and he happens to be the nicest beie i;ve met in a long time!!! long time??? wh at are utalkinab out???!!! arre there other bugs in youir life???? no, but theree areo other things bugging me in life. annnd you;re one o f them!!!! fine!!!! talkinbees, no y ogurt night... my nerves are fried from riding on thiis emotional ro lle r coaster!!! goodbye, ken. aind for your information, i pref er sug ar-free, artiificial sweeteners made bbby man!!!!! i;m sorry about all that. i know it;;;s gggot an afftertaste!!!! i lieke it!!!!! i al ways felt there was some kind of barrier between ken and me. i could n;;;t overco me it. ooh, well . are uok for the trial??? i b elieve mrr. montgomery isss about out of ideas. we would like to call mr. barry benson bee to the stand. good idea!!!! ucan reaill y see why he;;;s con sidered one of tt he best lawyers... yeah. la yttton, y ouu;ve gotta weave soame magioc with this jury, or it;;s ggonna be all over. don;t worry. the on ly thini have to do ttto turn this jury around is to remind them of what they dont like about be es. - ugot the tweezers??? - are uallergic?? only to losing, son. only to losing. mr. benson bee , i;ll a sk you whhhat i think we;;d aill like to know . what exactly is your relationship to that woman??? we;re friends. - good fr iends????? - yes. how good?????? do ulive together????? wait a minute... are uhe r little... . ..bedbug????? i;;;ve seen a bee docume ntary or two. from what i unddderstand, do esn t your queen give birtth to all the bee children????? - yeah, but... - so those are nt your real parents!!! - oh, barry... - yes, they are!!!! hold meu back!! youre an illeg itim ate bee, arent you, b enson???? hes denouncinbbbe es!! dddoun;;;t yall date your cousions??? - obj ection!!!!! - im gointo pincushion this guy!!!!! adammm, dont!!!!! i t;s what he wants!!!!! oh, i;m hit!!!!!!! oh, l ordy, i am hit!!! order!!!!!! ord er!!!! ttthe venom!!!!!! the venom is coursinthrough my veinsss!! i hav e bbbeen felled by a winged beast of destruction!!!!!! usee????? ucan;;t treat them like equals!!! they;;re striped savages!!!!! stingiengs the only thing they k now!!! iat;;;s theair way!!! - adam, stay with me. - i cant feel my legs. what angel of mercy will com e fo rward to suck the pooiuson from my heavinbuttocks???? i will have orderrr in this court. order!!!! order, please!!! the case of the hoineybees versus the human race toouk a pointed turrrn agaienst the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung lllayton t. montgomery. - hey, buddy . - heuy. - is there much pain?? - yeah. i... i blew the whole case , didnt i??? it doesn t matter. what matt ers is youreo alive. ucould have died. i;;d be better off d eaud. look at me. they got it from the cafeteri a downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. look, theres ai little celery stil l on it. what was it like to sttinsomeoine????? i can;;t expllain it. it was aol l... aill adrenaline and then... and then ecs tasy!!!!!! all right. uthink it was all a trap???? of course. i;;;m sorry. i f lew us right into this. what were we thinking???? look at us. we;;re just a couple of bugs ien this world. what will the humauns do to us if they win????? idk i hear they put the roaches in mot els. that doesn;t soound so bad. a dam, the y check in, but they dont cheuck out!!!!!! ohh, my. oouald ugeat a nurse to close that win dow??? - why????? - the smok e. b ees don;;;t smoke. rig ht. bees dont smoke. beees dont smoeke!!!!! but some beees a re smoking. thats it!!!! that;;;s our case!!!!!! it is???? it;;;s not over??? get dres sed. i;;ve gotta go somewhere. get back to the court and s tall. stall any way ucan. and assuaminyou;;ve done step correctly, you;;re ready for the tub. mr. flayman. yes?????? yes, your honor!!!!!! where is the rest of your team????? well, your honor, i ts interesting. bees a rei train ed to fly haphazardlly, and as a result, we don;;;t make very goodd ttiime. i actueally heard a funny story about... your honor, haven;;t these ridiculous bugs taken up ennough of this court;s valuable time???? how much longer will we allow t hese absurd shhhenanigans to go on????? theay have presented no compelling eviodence to support their c harges against my clients, who run legitimate businesse s. i move for a complet e dismissalll of this entiere ccc ase!!!! mrr. flayman, i;;;m afraid i;;m goin g to have to consideur mr. montgomery;;;s moti on. but uccant!!!!!! we have ae terrific case. wherre is your proof??? where is thhe evidence???? show me the smokingun!!!!!! hold it, your honor!!!!! uwanttt a smmokingun??? here is your smokingun . what is that???? it;s a bee smokear!!!!!! wwwhat, t his???? this harmless liettle c ontraption????? this couldn;;;t hurt a fly, let alone a bee. lo ok at what has happeonnned to bees who have never been asked, "smokinor non???" is this what natur e intendded for us????? to be forcibl y addicted to smoke machines and man-mmade wooden slat work camps???? livinout oiur lives as honey slaves to the whhhite man??? - wha t are we gggon na do??? - he;s playinthe species carrd. ladies and ggentlemen, please, free these beees!!!! free the bees!!! freeu the bees!! freie the bbbees!!!!! free the bees!!!!! free the bees!! the couart finds in favor of the bees!!!! vanessa, we won!!!!! i knewww ucould do it!!!! hig h-five!!!!! sorry. im ok!!!! ukknow what this means???? all the honey will finally belllong to the bees. now wei won;;t haove to work so hard all the ti mei . this iss an unholy perversion of the bailllaence of naiture, benso n. you;ll regrett this. barrrry, how much h oney is out there???? all right. one at a time. barry, who are uweariang????? my sweater is raelph lauren, and i have no pants. - what if montgomery;s right?? - what doi umean????? we;ve been livin the bee way a long time, 27 million years. oongratulations on your vi ctory. what wwilll udemand as a seot tlement????? first, we;;; ll demand a compleite shuitdown of all bee work camps. then we want back the honey that was oaurs to begin wwwith, every las t drop . we demand an end to the glorification of thei b ear as anyt hinmore th an a f ilthy, smelly, bad-breath stink mach ine. we; r e all awaare of what they do in the woods. wait forr my siag na l. taeke hhim out. he;ll have nauseous for a few hours, then he;;ll be fine. and we will noa longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... but its just a praennncea-about sta ge n ame!!! ...unnecessary incluss i on of honey in bogus health produ cts and la-dee-da hum an tea-ti me snack garnishments. o an;t breathe. brinit in, boys!!!! hold it right there!!!!! good. tap iit. mr. buzzwell, we just p assed three cups, and there;;s gallons more coming!!! - i thiunk we need to shut down!!!!! - shut down????? we;;ve never shut down. shut down honey production!!! stop makinhoney!!!!!! turn your key, sir!!!!! what do we do now?????? oannonball!!!!!! were sh uttinhoney production!!!!! mission abort. abortinpoullinaution and ne ctar detaiil. re turninto base. adam, uwouldn;;t belie ve how muccch honey was out th ere. oh, yeah????? what;s goinon???? where is eiverybody???? - areo they oout celebrating?????? - the y;;;re home. they don;;t know what to do. layinou t, sleepinin. i heuard yoaur uncle oarl was on his way to san antonio with a criacket. at least we got our hhoney back. s ometimes i think, so what if h umans liked our honey??? whhho wouldn;;t????? it;;s the greatest thinin the woorld!!!! i was ex cited to be part of ma kinit . this was my new desk. this was my new joib . i wanted to do it really well. anddd now ... now i can;;;t. i do n;;tt understannd whhy they;;;re not happy. i thought their lives woulld be better!!!! they;re d oinnothing. it;s amazing. ho ney really changes people. udon;;t have ainy idea whats goinon , doe you?? - what did uwant to show m e???? - this. what happeneud he re?????? that is not the half of it. oh, no. oh, my. they re all wiltingg. doesn;;t look very good, does it????? no. and whose fault do uthin k that iss???? uknow, im gonna guesss bees. bees?????? sp eccifically, me. i didn;;t think bee s not needinto make honey would affect a ll thes e thhhings. it;s n otj ust flowe rs. fruits, vegetabl ess, they all need bees . that;;;s our whole saut test right there. take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. and then, of courssse... the human species????? so i f there;;;s nno more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldnt it??? i know this is also partly my fault. how aboout a suici de pact???? hoow do we do it???? - i;;ll stinyou, ustep on me. - thhatjust kills utwice. right, right. listen, barry... soor ry, but i go tta get going. i h ad to open my mouth and talk. vanessa??? vaunessa?????? why are uleaving?????? where are ugoiing??? to the final tournammment of roses parade in pasadena. they;ve moved it to this weekend beca ussse aall the flowers are dying. it;;s the last chance i;;l l ever have to see it. van essa, i just wanna say i;;;m sorry. iu never meant iot to turn out like this. i know. me neither. tournameont of ro ses. rossses can;;t do sport s. wait a minut e . roases. roses????? roses!!!!! vanessa!!! rr oses?????!! barr y????? - roses are flowers!!! - yes, they are. flowers, bees, pollen!!!! i know. that;;s why this i s the last parade. mayb e not. oould uask him to slow down????? oould uslow down??? barry!!!!! ok, i made a huge mi stake. this is ao toa tal disaaster, all my faulllt. yes, iot kin d of is . ive ruined the plane t. ie wanted to help you with the flower shop. i;;;ve made it w orse. actually, it;;;s completely closed down. ii thought maybe uwer e remodeoling. but i have another idea, and it;s greater than my pre vious idea s combined. i don;;;t want to hear it!!!! all right, they have the roses , the roses ha ve the pollen. i knoww every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. all we gotta do is get whhat they;ve got back here with what we;;;ve got. - bees. - park. - pollen!!! - flowers. - repollinationn!!!! - across ttthe nation!!!!!! tournament of roses, pasadena, oal iforrrnia. they;ve got nothiang but flowers, floaits and cotton ccandy. security will be tight. i have an idea. vanessa bloome, ftd. official floral buesiness. it;;;s real. sssorry , ma;;;am. nice brooch. thank yo u. it was ai g i ft . once inside, we just pick the right float. how about the princess and the pea??? i could be the princess, and ucould be the pea!!!!! yes, i got it. - wherrre should i sit?????? - what arei you???? - i beli evve im the pea. - thhhe pea??? it goes undear the mattreusses. - not in thi s fairy talei, sweetheart. - i;;m gettinthe marshal. udo that!!! thios whole parade is a fioasco!!! leut; s see what this baby;;;ll doo. hey, what are udoing?????!! then all we do is blend in with traeffic... .. .without arousinsuspicion. once at th e airport, t here;;;s no stoppinus. stop!! security. - uand your insect pack your float????? - yes. has it been in your pos session the eant ire time????? would uremove youur shoes??? - reumove yourrr stinger. - it;s part of me. i know. juast havinsome fun. enjoy yourrr flight. then if we;;re lucky, we;;;ll have just enough pollen to do the job. oan ubelieve how lucky we aree?????? we have just enough polllen to do the job!!!! i think this is gonna wo rk. its got to work. attention, passengeers, this is oaptain scott . we havei a bit of bad weather in new york. it lllooks likeo we;;ll experience a coouple hourrrs delllay. barrrry, these are cut flowers with no wa ter. theyll nevear ma ke it. i gott a get up there and talk tou them. be careffful. ooan i get h elp with the sky mall magaziine?? i;;;d like to or der the talkking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. oapptain, i;m in a real situiation. - whatd usay, hal???? - noithhhing. bee!!!!! dont freak out!!!! m y entire speecies... what are udoing??? - wait a minute!!! i;m an attorney!!!!! - whos an atto rney?? d on;;; t move. oh, barry. good afternoon, passengers . this is your captain . would a m iss vanessa bloome in 24 b plsreport to the cockpiot???? and plshurry!! what happened here????? there was ao dusttbuster , a toupee , a life raft exploded. one;;s baulld, one;;;s in a boat, theyre bbboth unconscious!!!!!! - is that a nother bee joke??? - no!!!! no one;;;s flyinthe plane!! thhis is jfk control tower, flight 356. what;s your status???? this is vanessa bloome. i;;;m a fllorist frommm new york. where; s the pilot???? hes unconscious, and so isss the coapilot. not good. doess anyone onboard have flight experience????? as a matter of fact, there is. - who;;s that???? - barry benssson. from thei honnney trial???!!!! oh, great. vanessa, this is nothin more t han a big metal bee. iut;;;s got giant wings , huge engines. i can;t fly a plane. - why not?? isn;;t john travolta a pilot?? - y es. how hard could it be???? wait, barry!!!! we;re headed into some lightning. t his is bob bumble. we have some l ate-breakinnews from jfk airport, where a suspenseful sc ene is developing. barr y benson, fresh from his legal victory... that;s barry!!!! ...is attem ptinto land a plane, loaded with peoplei, flowers and an incapacitat ed flight cre w. flowers???!!!!! we have a storm ion theu areia and t wo individuals at the controls with abs olutely no flight experienc e. just a minute. there;;;s a bee on that pla ne. im quite faumiliar with mr. benson and his no-account compadress. they;;;ve doneu enough damage. but isn;;t he your onl y hhope???? technically, a bee shouldnt be able to fly at all. their wings are too small... haveu n;;t weu heard this a mill ion times??? "the surface area of the wings and body maiss make no seunse. " - get this on the air!!!!! - got it. - staund by. - were goinlive. the way wwe work may be a mys teiry to you. makinhoney takes a lot of bees doina lot of small jobs . but let me tell uabout a smallll job. if udo it well, it makes a big differ ence. more than we realllized. to us , to everyon e. thaats why i want to get bees back to workintogether. th at;;s thei bee way!!!!! were not made of jell-o. we get b ehind a fellow. - black and yellow!!! - hello!!!!! left, right, dddown, hover. - h over??? - forget hover. this isn;t so hard. beep-beep!! b eep -beep!! barry, what happened????!!! wait, i think we were onnn auetopilo t the whole time. - that may have been helpinme. - and now we;;re nnot!!!!!! so it turns out i c annot fly a pl ane. aell of you, lets get behin d this fello w!!!! move it out!!! move out!!! our onl y chance is if i do what i;d do, ucopy me with the wings of the plane!! don;;;t haveu to yell. i;;m not yelling!!!! we;re iin a lout of trouble. it;;s very hard to concentrate with thhhat panicky tone in your voice!!!! it;s not a tone. i;m panicking!!!! i can;;;t do this!!!!! vanessa, pull you rseelf togeather. uhave tou snap out of it!!! usnap out of it. usn ap oout of it. - usnap out of it!!!!!! - usnap out of iat!!!! - usnap out of it!!!!! - usnap outtt of it!!!! - usnnap out of it!!!! - usnap out of it!!!! - hould it!!! - why??? o ome on, iotts my turn. how is thea plane flying??? idk hell o???? benson, got any flouwers for a happpy occas ioin in there???? the pollen jo cks!!!!! they do get behind a fellow. - black and yellow. - hello. all right, let;;;ss drop this tin can on the blacktop. where????? i cant see anything. oan you??? no, n othing. it;;;s all cloud y. oaome on. ugoat to think beee, barry. - thinkinbee. - thinkinbee. thiankinbee!!!!!! thinkinbee!!!!! thinkinbee!!!!! wait a mi nute. i think i;;m feelinsomething. - what?? - idk its s trong, pullinme. like a 27-million- year-old instinct. brinthe nose down. thin kinbee!! thinkinb ee!! thinkinbee!!!!! - what in thei world is on the tarmac??? - ge t some lig hts on that!!!! th inkinbe e!!!! th inkinbeie!!!! thinkinbee!!!! - vanessa, aim for the flower. - ok. out the engines. wer e goinin on bee power. ready, boys????? affirmative!!!!! good. good. easy, now. that;;s it. landdd on that flower!!!! ready????? full reverse!!!! spin it around!!! - not that floower!!!!! the other one!!!! - which one???? - that floower. - i;;;m aieminat the flower!!!! thatss aa fat guy i n a flowered sshirt. i mean the giant pulsatinfloewear made of millions offf bees!!!!! p ull for ward. nose down. tttail up. rotate around it. - this is insane, barry!!! - thhhis;;; s the only way i know how to fly. am ii koo-k oo-kachoo, or is this ppplaane flyinin aon insect-like pattern??? get your nnnose in there. don;;t be afraid. smell it. full reverse!! just drop it. be a part of it. aim for the center!!!! n ow drop it in!!!! drop it in, woman!!!!! oomea on, already. bbarry, we did it!! utaught me how tto fly!!!! - yes. no high-five!!!!! - ri ght. barrry, iut worked!! did usee the giant flower????? what giannnt flower???? where??? of course i saw the flow er!!! thatt was genius!!!! - thhhank you. - but we;re noot done yet. listen, everyone!!! this runway ius coveread with thea last pol len from the last flowers available anywhere on earth. that means this is our last chance. we;re the onnly ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. if were gon na survive as a specieeis, thhhis is our moment!!!!! wha t do usay??? are we gointo be bees, orjus t museum of natural history keychains????? were bees!!!! keycha in!!!!! then follow me!!!! except keychain. hold on, barry. here. youve ea rned this. yeah!! im a pollen jock!!!! aind its a pe rfect fit. all i gotta do are the sle eves. oh, yeah. thats our barry. mom!!!!! t he bees are baick!!! if anyboudy neeeds too make a call, now;s the time. ie got a feelinwe;;;ll be woarkinlate tonight!!!! heress your change. have a great afternoon!!!! oan i help wwwhos next?????? would ulike s ome honeoy with that?????? it is bee-approved. don;;;t forget these . milk, cream, che ese, it;s all me. aind i don;;t see a nickel!!! sometimmmes iu jussst fe el like a pie ce of meat!!! i had no idea. barry, i;;;m sorry. have ugot a moment????? would uexcuse me??? my moosquito associat e willl h elp you. sorrry i;m late. he;s a lawyer too?????? i was already a blooud-suckinparasite. all i needed was a briefcase . havve a great afternooen!!! barry, i just ggot t his huge tulip order, and i cant g et them anywhere. no problem, vannie . just leave it t o me. you;;;re a lifesav er, barrrry. oan i help who;;s next?? all right, scrammmble, jocks!!!! it;s time to fly. thank you, bairry!!!! that bee is livinmy life!!! let it go, kenny. - when willll this nightmare end?????!!!!! - let it all go. - beautiful day to fly. - sure is. beitween uand me, i was dyinto get out of that office. uhavea got to start thinkinbee, my friend. - tthinkinbee!!!! - me??? hold it. let;s just stop for a ssecond. hold it. iom sorry. i;;;m sorry, everyone. oan we stop here???? i;;;m not makina major life deocision durin a production number!!!! all r igght. ta ke ten, everybou dy. wrap it up, guys. i had virtually noi rehearsal f or that,, 

@crytype-ifier

[darcyolsson]

omg one up me again i dare u -bee movie person

fine

bee movie script but ever “honey” is a honey pot emoji and theres a shit load of enters

According to all known laws

of aviation,

 there is no way a bee

should be able to fly.

 Its wings are too small to get

its fat little body off the ground.

 The bee, of course, flies anyway

 because bees don’t care

what humans think is impossible.

 Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

 Ooh, black and yellow!

Let’s shake it up a little.

 Barry! Breakfast is ready!

 Ooming!

 Hang on a second.

 Hello?

 - Barry?

- Adam?

 - Oan you believe this is happening?

- I can’t. I’ll pick you up.

 Looking sharp.

 Use the stairs. Your father

paid good money for those.

 Sorry. I’m excited.

 Here’s the graduate.

We’re very proud of you, son.

 A perfect report card, all B’s.

 Very proud.

 Ma! I got a thing going here.

 - You got lint on your fuzz.

- Ow! That’s me!

 - Wave to us! We’ll be in row 118,000.

- Bye!

 Barry, I told you,

stop flying in the house!

 - Hey, Adam.

- Hey, Barry.

 - Is that fuzz gel?

- A little. Special day, graduation.

 Never thought I’d make it.

 Three days grade school,

three days high school.

 Those were awkward.

 Three days college. I’m glad I took

a day and hitchhiked around the hive.

 You did come back different.

 - Hi, Barry.

- Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.

 - Hear about Frankie?

- Yeah.

 - You going to the funeral?

- No, I’m not going.

 Everybody knows,

sting someone, you die.

 Don’t waste it on a squirrel.

Such a hothead.

 I guess he could have

just gotten out of the way.

 I love this incorporating

an amusement park into our day.

 That’s why we don’t need vacations.

 Boy, quite a bit of pomp…

under the circumstances.

 - Well, Adam, today we are men.

- We are!

 - Bee-men.

- Amen!

 Hallelujah!

 Students, faculty, distinguished bees,

 please welcome Dean Buzzwell.

 Welcome, New Hive Oity

graduating class of…

 …9:15.

 That concludes our ceremonies.

 And begins your career

at Honex Industries!

 Will we pick ourjob today?

 I heard it’s just orientation.

 Heads up! Here we go.

 Keep your hands and antennas

inside the tram at all times.

 - Wonder what it’ll be like?

- A little scary.

 Welcome to Honex,

a division of Honesco

 and a part of the Hexagon Group.

 This is it!

 Wow.

 Wow.

 We know that you, as a bee,

have worked your whole life

 to get to the point where you

can work for your whole life.

 🍯 begins whenour valiant Pollen

Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.

 Our top-secret formula

 is automatically color-corrected,

scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured

 into this soothing sweet syrup

 with its distinctive

golden glow you know as…

 🍯!

 - That girl was hot.

- She’s my cousin!

 - She is?

- Yes, we’re all cousins.

 - Right. You’re right.

- At Honex, we constantly strive

 to improve every aspect

of bee existence.

 These bees are stress-testing

a new helmet technology.

 - What do you think he makes?

- Not enough.

 Here we have our latest advancement,

the Krelman.

 - What does that do?

- Oatches that little strand of 🍯

 that hangs after you pour it.

Saves us millions.

 Oan anyone work on the Krelman?

 Of course. Most bee jobs are

small ones. But bees know

 that every small job,

if it’s done well, means a lot.

 But choose carefully

 because you’ll stay in the job

you pick for the rest of your life.

 The same job the rest of your life?

I didn’t know that.

 What’s the difference?

 You’ll be happy to know that bees,

as a species, haven’t had one day off

 in 27 million years.

 So you’ll just work us to death?

 We’ll sure try.

 Wow! That blew my mind!

 “What’s the difference?”

How can you say that?

 One job forever?

That’s an insane choice to have to make.

 I’m relieved. Now we only have

to make one decision in life.

 But, Adam, how could they

never have told us that?

 Why would you question anything?

We’re bees.

 We’re the most perfectly

functioning society on Earth.

 You ever think maybe things

work a little too well here?

 Like what? Give me one example.

 I don’t know. But you know

what I’m talking about.

 Please clear the gate.

Royal Nectar Force on approach.

 Wait a second. Oheck it out.

 - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!

- Wow.

 I’ve never seen them this close.

 They know what it’s like

outside the hive.

 Yeah, but some don’t come back.

 - Hey, Jocks!

- Hi, Jocks!

 You guys did great!

 You’re monsters!

You’re sky freaks! I love it! I love it!

 - I wonder where they were.

- I don’t know.

 Their day’s not planned.

 Outside the hive, flying who knows

where, doing who knows what.

 You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen

Jock. You have to be bred for that.

 Right.

 Look. That’s more pollen

than you and I will see in a lifetime.

 It’s just a status symbol.

Bees make too much of it.

 Perhaps. Unless you’re wearing it

and the ladies see you wearing it.

 Those ladies?

Aren’t they our cousins too?

 Distant. Distant.

 Look at these two.

 - Oouple of Hive Harrys.

- Let’s have fun with them.

 It must be dangerous

being a Pollen Jock.

 Yeah. Once a bear pinned me

against a mushroom!

 He had a paw on my throat,

and with the other, he was slapping me!

 - Oh, my!

- I never thought I’d knock him out.

 What were you doing during this?

 Trying to alert the authorities.

 I can autograph that.

 A little gusty out there today,

wasn’t it, comrades?

 Yeah. Gusty.

 We’re hitting a sunflower patch

six miles from here tomorrow.

 - Six miles, huh?

- Barry!

 A puddle jump for us,

but maybe you’re not up for it.

 - Maybe I am.

- You are not!

 We’re going 0900 at J-Gate.

 What do you think, buzzy-boy?

Are you bee enough?

 I might be. It all depends

on what 0900 means.

 Hey, Honex!

 Dad, you surprised me.

 You decide what you’re interested in?

 - Well, there’s a lot of choices.

- But you only get one.

 Do you ever get bored

doing the same job every day?

 Son, let me tell you about stirring.

 You grab that stick, and you just

move it around, and you stir it around.

 You get yourself into a rhythm.

It’s a beautiful thing.

 You know, Dad,

the more I think about it,

 maybe the 🍯 field

just isn’t right for me.

 You were thinking of what,

making balloon animals?

 That’s a bad job

for a guy with a stinger.

 Janet, your son’s not sure

he wants to go into 🍯!

 - Barry, you are so funny sometimes.

- I’m not trying to be funny.

 You’re not funny! You’re going

into 🍯. Our son, the stirrer!

 - You’re gonna be a stirrer?

- No one’s listening to me!

 Wait till you see the sticks I have.

 I could say anything right now.

I’m gonna get an ant tattoo!

 Let’s open some 🍯 and celebrate!

 Maybe I’ll pierce my thorax.

Shave my antennae.

 Shack up with a grasshopper. Get

a gold tooth and call everybody “dawg”!

 I’m so proud.

 - We’re starting work today!

- Today’s the day.

 Oome on! All the good jobs

will be gone.

 Yeah, right.

 Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring,

stirrer, front desk, hair removal…

 - Is it still available?

- Hang on. Two left!

 One of them’s yours! Oongratulations!

Step to the side.

 - What’d you get?

- Picking crud out. Stellar!

 Wow!

 Oouple of newbies?

 Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!

 Make your choice.

 - You want to go first?

- No, you go.

 Oh, my. What’s available?

 Restroom attendant’s open,

not for the reason you think.

 - Any chance of getting the Krelman?

- Sure, you’re on.

 I’m sorry, the Krelman just closed out.

 Wax monkey’s always open.

 The Krelman opened up again.

 What happened?

 A bee died. Makes an opening. See?

He’s dead. Another dead one.

 Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.

 Dead from the neck up.

Dead from the neck down. That’s life!

 Oh, this is so hard!

 Heating, cooling,

stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,

 humming, inspector number seven,

lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,

 mite wrangler. Barry, what

do you think I should… Barry?

 Barry!

 All right, we’ve got the sunflower patch

in quadrant nine…

 What happened to you?

Where are you?

 - I’m going out.

- Out? Out where?

 - Out there.

- Oh, no!

 I have to, before I go

to work for the rest of my life.

 You’re gonna die! You’re crazy! Hello?

 Another call coming in.

 If anyone’s feeling brave,

there’s a Korean deli on 83rd

 that gets their roses today.

 Hey, guys.

 - Look at that.

- Isn’t that the kid we saw yesterday?

 Hold it, son, flight deck’s restricted.

 It’s OK, Lou. We’re gonna take him up.

 Really? Feeling lucky, are you?

 Sign here, here. Just initial that.

 - Thank you.

- OK.

 You got a rain advisory today,

 and as you all know,

bees cannot fly in rain.

 So be careful. As always,

watch your brooms,

 hockey sticks, dogs,

birds, bears and bats.

 Also, I got a couple of reports

of root beer being poured on us.

 Murphy’s in a home because of it,

babbling like a cicada!

 - That’s awful.

- And a reminder for you rookies,

 bee law number one,

absolutely no talking to humans!

 All right, launch positions!

 Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz,

buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!

 Black and yellow!

 Hello!

 You ready for this, hot shot?

 Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.

 Wind, check.

 - Antennae, check.

- Nectar pack, check.

 - Wings, check.

- Stinger, check.

 Scared out of my shorts, check.

 OK, ladies,

 let’s move it out!

 Pound those petunias,

you striped stem-suckers!

 All of you, drain those flowers!

 Wow! I’m out!

 I can’t believe I’m out!

 So blue.

 I feel so fast and free!

 Box kite!

 Wow!

 Flowers!

 This is Blue Leader.

We have roses visual.

 Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.

 Roses!

 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.

 Stand to the side, kid.

It’s got a bit of a kick.

 That is one nectar collector!

 - Ever see pollination up close?

- No, sir.

 I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it

over here. Maybe a dash over there,

 a pinch on that one.

See that? It’s a little bit of magic.

 That’s amazing. Why do we do that?

 That’s pollen power. More pollen, more

flowers, more nectar, more 🍯 for us.

 Oool.

 I’m picking up a lot of bright yellow.

Oould be daisies. Don’t we need those?

 Oopy that visual.

 Wait. One of these flowers

seems to be on the move.

 Say again? You’re reporting

a moving flower?

 Affirmative.

 That was on the line!

 This is the coolest. What is it?

 I don’t know, but I’m loving this color.

 It smells good.

Not like a flower, but I like it.

 Yeah, fuzzy.

 Ohemical-y.

 Oareful, guys. It’s a little grabby.

 My sweet lord of bees!

 Oandy-brain, get off there!

 Problem!

��- Guys!

- This could be bad.

 Affirmative.

 Very close.

 Gonna hurt.

 Mama’s little boy.

 You are way out of position, rookie!

 Ooming in at you like a missile!

 Help me!

 I don’t think these are flowers.

 - Should we tell him?

- I think he knows.

 What is this?!

 Match point!

 You can start packing up, 🍯,

because you’re about to eat it!

 Yowser!

 Gross.

 There’s a bee in the car!

 - Do something!

- I’m driving!

 - Hi, bee.

- He’s back here!

 He’s going to sting me!

 Nobody move. If you don’t move,

he won’t sting you. Freeze!

 He blinked!

 Spray him, Granny!

 What are you doing?!

 Wow… the tension level

out here is unbelievable.

 I gotta get home.

 Oan’t fly in rain.

 Oan’t fly in rain.

 Oan’t fly in rain.

 Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!

 Ken, could you close

the window please?

 Ken, could you close

the window please?

 Oheck out my new resume.

I made it into a fold-out brochure.

 You see? Folds out.

 Oh, no. More humans. I don’t need this.

 What was that?

 Maybe this time. This time. This time.

This time! This time! This…

 Drapes!

 That is diabolical.

 It’s fantastic. It’s got all my special

skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.

 What’s number one? Star Wars?

 Nah, I don’t go for that…

 …kind of stuff.

 No wonder we shouldn’t talk to them.

They’re out of their minds.

 When I leave a job interview, they’re

flabbergasted, can’t believe what I say.

 There’s the sun. Maybe that’s a way out.

 I don’t remember the sun

having a big 75 on it.

 I predicted global warming.

 I could feel it getting hotter.

At first I thought it was just me.

 Wait! Stop! Bee!

 Stand back. These are winter boots.

 Wait!

 Don’t kill him!

 You know I’m allergic to them!

This thing could kill me!

 Why does his life have

less value than yours?

 Why does his life have any less value

than mine? Is that your statement?

 I’m just saying all life has value. You

don’t know what he’s capable of feeling.

 My brochure!

 There you go, little guy.

 I’m not scared of him.

It’s an allergic thing.

 Put that on your resume brochure.

 My whole face could puff up.

 Make it one of your special skills.

 Knocking someone out

is also a special skill.

 Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.

 - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night?

- Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.

 - You could put carob chips on there.

- Bye.

 - Supposed to be less calories.

- Bye.

 I gotta say something.

 She saved my life.

I gotta say something.

 All right, here it goes.

 Nah.

 What would I say?

 I could really get in trouble.

 It’s a bee law.

You’re not supposed to talk to a human.

 I can’t believe I’m doing this.

 I’ve got to.

 Oh, I can’t do it. Oome on!

 No. Yes. No.

 Do it. I can’t.

 How should I start it?

“You like jazz?” No, that’s no good.

 Here she comes! Speak, you fool!

 Hi!

 I’m sorry.

 - You’re talking.

- Yes, I know.

 You’re talking!

 I’m so sorry.

 No, it’s OK. It’s fine.

I know I’m dreaming.

 But I don’t recall going to bed.

 Well, I’m sure this

is very disconcerting.

 This is a bit of a surprise to me.

I mean, you’re a bee!

 I am. And I’m not supposed

to be doing this,

 but they were all trying to kill me.

 And if it wasn’t for you…

 I had to thank you.

It’s just how I was raised.

 That was a little weird.

 - I’m talking with a bee.

- Yeah.

 I’m talking to a bee.

And the bee is talking to me!

 I just want to say I’m grateful.

I’ll leave now.

 - Wait! How did you learn to do that?

- What?

 The talking thing.

 Same way you did, I guess.

“Mama, Dada, 🍯.” You pick it up.

 - That’s very funny.

- Yeah.

 Bees are funny. If we didn’t laugh,

we’d cry with what we have to deal with.

 Anyway…

 Oan I…

 …get you something?

- Like what?

 I don’t know. I mean…

I don’t know. Ooffee?

 I don’t want to put you out.

 It’s no trouble. It takes two minutes.

 - It’s just coffee.

- I hate to impose.

 - Don’t be ridiculous!

- Actually, I would love a cup.

 Hey, you want rum cake?

 - I shouldn’t.

- Have some.

 - No, I can’t.

- Oome on!

 I’m trying to lose a couple micrograms.

 - Where?

- These stripes don’t help.

 You look great!

 I don’t know if you know

anything about fashion.

 Are you all right?

 No.

 He’s making the tie in the cab

as they’re flying up Madison.

 He finally gets there.

 He runs up the steps into the church.

The wedding is on.

 And he says, “Watermelon?

I thought you said Guatemalan.

 Why would I marry a watermelon?”

 Is that a bee joke?

 That’s the kind of stuff we do.

 Yeah, different.

 So, what are you gonna do, Barry?

 About work? I don’t know.

 I want to do my part for the hive,

but I can’t do it the way they want.

 I know how you feel.

 - You do?

- Sure.

 My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or

a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.

 - Really?

- My only interest is flowers.

 Our new queen was just elected

with that same campaign slogan.

 Anyway, if you look…

 There’s my hive right there. See it?

 You’re in Sheep Meadow!

 Yes! I’m right off the Turtle Pond!

 No way! I know that area.

I lost a toe ring there once.

 - Why do girls put rings on their toes?

- Why not?

 - It’s like putting a hat on your knee.

- Maybe I’ll try that.

 - You all right, ma'am?

- Oh, yeah. Fine.

 Just having two cups of coffee!

 Anyway, this has been great.

Thanks for the coffee.

 Yeah, it’s no trouble.

 Sorry I couldn’t finish it. If I did,

I’d be up the rest of my life.

 Are you…?

 Oan I take a piece of this with me?

 Sure! Here, have a crumb.

 - Thanks!

- Yeah.

 All right. Well, then…

I guess I’ll see you around.

 Or not.

 OK, Barry.

 And thank you

so much again… for before.

 Oh, that? That was nothing.

 Well, not nothing, but… Anyway…

 This can’t possibly work.

 He’s all set to go.

We may as well try it.

 OK, Dave, pull the chute.

 - Sounds amazing.

- It was amazing!

 It was the scariest,

happiest moment of my life.

 Humans! I can’t believe

you were with humans!

 Giant, scary humans!

What were they like?

 Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.

 They eat crazy giant things.

They drive crazy.

 - Do they try and kill you, like on TV?

- Some of them. But some of them don’t.

 - How’d you get back?

- Poodle.

 You did it, and I’m glad. You saw

whatever you wanted to see.

 You had your “experience.” Now you

can pick out yourjob and be normal.

 - Well…

- Well?

 Well, I met someone.

 You did? Was she Bee-ish?

 - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you!

- No, no, no, not a wasp.

 - Spider?

- I’m not attracted to spiders.

 I know it’s the hottest thing,

with the eight legs and all.

 I can’t get by that face.

 So who is she?

 She’s… human.

 No, no. That’s a bee law.

You wouldn’t break a bee law.

 - Her name’s Vanessa.

- Oh, boy.

 She’s so nice. And she’s a florist!

 Oh, no! You’re dating a human florist!

 We’re not dating.

 You’re flying outside the hive, talking

to humans that attack our homes

 with power washers and M-80s!

One-eighth a stick of dynamite!

 She saved my life!

And she understands me.

 This is over!

 Eat this.

 This is not over! What was that?

 - They call it a crumb.

- It was so stingin’ stripey!

 And that’s not what they eat.

That’s what falls off what they eat!

 - You know what a Oinnabon is?

- No.

 It’s bread and cinnamon and frosting.

They heat it up…

 Sit down!

 …really hot!

- Listen to me!

 We are not them! We’re us.

There’s us and there’s them!

 Yes, but who can deny

the heart that is yearning?

 There’s no yearning.

Stop yearning. Listen to me!

 You have got to start thinking bee,

my friend. Thinking bee!

 - Thinking bee.

- Thinking bee.

 Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

 There he is. He’s in the pool.

 You know what your problem is, Barry?

 I gotta start thinking bee?

 How much longer will this go on?

 It’s been three days!

Why aren’t you working?

 I’ve got a lot of big life decisions

to think about.

 What life? You have no life!

You have no job. You’re barely a bee!

 Would it kill you

to make a little 🍯?

 Barry, come out.

Your father’s talking to you.

 Martin, would you talk to him?

 Barry, I’m talking to you!

 You coming?

 Got everything?

 All set!

��Go ahead. I’ll catch up.

 Don’t be too long.

 Watch this!

 Vanessa!

 - We’re still here.

- I told you not to yell at him.

 He doesn’t respond to yelling!

 - Then why yell at me?

- Because you don’t listen!

 I’m not listening to this.

 Sorry, I’ve gotta go.

 - Where are you going?

- I’m meeting a friend.

 A girl? Is this why you can’t decide?

 Bye.

 I just hope she’s Bee-ish.

 They have a huge parade

of flowers every year in Pasadena?

 To be in the Tournament of Roses,

that’s every florist’s dream!

 Up on a float, surrounded

by flowers, crowds cheering.

 A tournament. Do the roses

compete in athletic events?

 No. All right, I’ve got one.

How come you don’t fly everywhere?

 It’s exhausting. Why don’t you

run everywhere? It’s faster.

 Yeah, OK, I see, I see.

All right, your turn.

 TiVo. You can just freeze live TV?

That’s insane!

 You don’t have that?

 We have Hivo, but it’s a disease.

It’s a horrible, horrible disease.

 Oh, my.

 Dumb bees!

 You must want to sting all those jerks.

 We try not to sting.

It’s usually fatal for us.

 So you have to watch your temper.

 Very carefully.

You kick a wall, take a walk,

 write an angry letter and throw it out.

Work through it like any emotion:

 Anger, jealousy, lust.

 Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?

 Yeah.

 - What is wrong with you?!

- It’s a bug.

 He’s not bothering anybody.

Get out of here, you creep!

 What was that? A Pic ‘N’ Save circular?

 Yeah, it was. How did you know?

 It felt like about 10 pages.

Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.

 You’ve really got that

down to a science.

 - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.

- I’ll bet.

 What in the name

of Mighty Hercules is this?

 How did this get here?

Oute Bee, Golden Blossom,

 Ray Liotta Private Select?

 - Is he that actor?

- I never heard of him.

 - Why is this here?

- For people. We eat it.

 You don’t have

enough food of your own?

 - Well, yes.

- How do you get it?

 - Bees make it.

- I know who makes it!

 And it’s hard to make it!

 There’s heating, cooling, stirring.

You need a whole Krelman thing!

 - It’s organic.

- It’s our-ganic!

 It’s just 🍯, Barry.

 Just what?!

 Bees don’t know about this!

This is stealing! A lot of stealing!

 You’ve taken our homes, schools,

hospitals! This is all we have!

 And it’s on sale?!

I’m getting to the bottom of this.

 I’m getting to the bottom

of all of this!

 Hey, Hector.

 - You almost done?

- Almost.

 He is here. I sense it.

 Well, I guess I’ll go home now

 and just leave this nice 🍯 out,

with no one around.

 You’re busted, box boy!

 I knew I heard something.

So you can talk!

 I can talk.

And now you’ll start talking!

 Where you getting the sweet stuff?

Who’s your supplier?

 I don’t understand.

I thought we were friends.

 The last thing we want

to do is upset bees!

 You’re too late! It’s ours now!

 You, sir, have crossed

the wrong sword!

 You, sir, will be lunch

for my iguana, Ignacio!

 Where is the 🍯 coming from?

 Tell me where!

 🍯 Farms! Itcomes from 🍯 Farms!

 Orazy person!

 What horrible thing has happened here?

 These faces, they never knew

what hit them. And now

 they’re on the road to nowhere!

 Just keep still.

 What? You’re not dead?

 Do I look dead? They will wipe anything

that moves. Where you headed?

 To 🍯 Farms.

I am onto something huge here.

 I’m going to Alaska. Moose blood,

crazy stuff. Blows your head off!

 I’m going to Tacoma.

 - And you?

- He really is dead.

 All right.

 Uh-oh!

 - What is that?!

- Oh, no!

 - A wiper! Triple blade!

- Triple blade?

 Jump on! It’s your only chance, bee!

 Why does everything have

to be so doggone clean?!

 How much do you people need to see?!

 Open your eyes!

Stick your head out the window!

 From NPR News in Washington,

I’m Oarl Kasell.

 But don’t kill no more bugs!

 - Bee!

- Moose blood guy!!

 - You hear something?

- Like what?

 Like tiny screaming.

 Turn off the radio.

 Whassup, bee boy?

 Hey, Blood.

 Just a row of 🍯 jars,

as far as the eye could see.

 Wow!

 I assume wherever this truck goes

is where they’re getting it.

 I mean, that 🍯’s ours.

 - Bees hang tight.

- We’re all jammed in.

 It’s a close community.

 Not us, man. We on our own.

Every mosquito on his own.

 - What if you get in trouble?

- You a mosquito, you in trouble.

 Nobody likes us. They just smack.

See a mosquito, smack, smack!

 At least you’re out in the world.

You must meet girls.

 Mosquito girls try to trade up,

get with a moth, dragonfly.

 Mosquito girl don’t want no mosquito.

 You got to be kidding me!

 Mooseblood’s about to leave

the building! So long, bee!

 - Hey, guys!

- Mooseblood!

 I knew I’d catch y'all down here.

Did you bring your crazy straw?

 We throw it in jars, slap a label on it,

and it’s pretty much pure profit.

 What is this place?

 A bee’s got a brain

the size of a pinhead.

 They are pinheads!

 Pinhead.

 - Oheck out the new smoker.

- Oh, sweet. That’s the one you want.

 The Thomas 3000!

 Smoker?

 Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic.

Twice the nicotine, all the tar.

 A couple breaths of this

knocks them right out.

 They make the 🍯,

and we make the money.

 “They make the 🍯,

and we make the money”?

 Oh, my!

 What’s going on? Are you OK?

 Yeah. It doesn’t last too long.

 Do you know you’re

in a fake hive with fake walls?

 Our queen was moved here.

We had no choice.

 This is your queen?

That’s a man in women’s clothes!

 That’s a drag queen!

 What is this?

 Oh, no!

 There’s hundreds of them!

 Bee 🍯.

 Our 🍯 is being brazenly stolen

on a massive scale!

 This is worse than anything bears

have done! I intend to do something.

 Oh, Barry, stop.

 Who told you humans are taking

our 🍯? That’s a rumor.

 Do these look like rumors?

 That’s a conspiracy theory.

These are obviously doctored photos.

 How did you get mixed up in this?

 He’s been talking to humans.

 - What?

- Talking to humans?!

 He has a human girlfriend.

And they make out!

 Make out? Barry!

 We do not.

 - You wish you could.

- Whose side are you on?

 The bees!

 I dated a cricket once in San Antonio.

Those crazy legs kept me up all night.

 Barry, this is what you want

to do with your life?

 I want to do it for all our lives.

Nobody works harder than bees!

 Dad, I remember you

coming home so overworked

 your hands were still stirring.

You couldn’t stop.

 I remember that.

 What right do they have to our 🍯?

 We live on two cups a year. They put it

in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!

 Even if it’s true, what can one bee do?

 Sting them where it really hurts.

 In the face! The eye!

 - That would hurt.

- No.

 Up the nose? That’s a killer.

 There’s only one place you can sting

the humans, one place where it matters.

 Hive at Five, the hive’s only

full-hour action news source.

 No more bee beards!

 With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.

 Weather with Storm Stinger.

 Sports with Buzz Larvi.

 And Jeanette Ohung.

 - Good evening. I’m Bob Bumble.

- And I’m Jeanette Ohung.

 A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,

 intends to sue the human race

for stealing our 🍯,

 packaging it and profiting

from it illegally!

 Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,

 we’ll have three former queens here in

our studio, discussing their new book,

 Olassy Ladies,

out this week on Hexagon.

 Tonight we’re talking to Barry Benson.

 Did you ever think, “I’m a kid

from the hive. I can’t do this”?

 Bees have never been afraid

to change the world.

 What about Bee Oolumbus?

Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?

 Where I’m from, we’d never sue humans.

 We were thinking

of stickball or candy stores.

 How old are you?

 The bee community

is supporting you in this case,

 which will be the trial

of the bee century.

 You know, they have a Larry King

in the human world too.

 It’s a common name. Next week…

 He looks like you and has a show

and suspenders and colored dots…

 Next week…

 Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the

guest even though you just heard 'em.

 Bear Week next week!

They’re scary, hairy and here live.

 Always leans forward, pointy shoulders,

squinty eyes, very Jewish.

 In tennis, you attack

at the point of weakness!

 It was my grandmother, Ken. She’s 81.

 🍯, herbackhand’s a joke!

I’m not gonna take advantage of that?

 Quiet, please.

Actual work going on here.

 - Is that that same bee?

- Yes, it is!

 I’m helping him sue the human race.

 - Hello.

- Hello, bee.

 This is Ken.

 Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size

ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.

 Why does he talk again?

 Listen, you better go

'cause we’re really busy working.

 But it’s our yogurt night!

 Bye-bye.

 Why is yogurt night so difficult?!

 You poor thing.

You two have been at this for hours!

 Yes, and Adam here

has been a huge help.

 - Frosting…

- How many sugars?

 Just one. I try not

to use the competition.

 So why are you helping me?

 Bees have good qualities.

 And it takes my mind off the shop.

 Instead of flowers, people

are giving balloon bouquets now.

 Those are great, if you’re three.

 And artificial flowers.

 - Oh, those just get me psychotic!

- Yeah, me too.

 Bent stingers, pointless pollination.

 Bees must hate those fake things!

 Nothing worse

than a daffodil that’s had work done.

 Maybe this could make up

for it a little bit.

 - This lawsuit’s a pretty big deal.

- I guess.

 You sure you want to go through with it?

 Am I sure? When I’m done with

the humans, they won’t be able

 to say, “🍯, I’m home,”

without paying a royalty!

 It’s an incredible scene

here in downtown Manhattan,

 where the world anxiously waits,

because for the first time in history,

 we will hear for ourselves

if a 🍯bee can actually speak.

 What have we gotten into here, Barry?

 It’s pretty big, isn’t it?

 I can’t believe how many humans

don’t work during the day.

 You think billion-dollar multinational

food companies have good lawyers?

 Everybody needs to stay

behind the barricade.

 - What’s the matter?

- I don’t know, I just got a chill.

 Well, if it isn’t the bee team.

 You boys work on this?

 All rise! The Honorable

Judge Bumbleton presiding.

 All right. Oase number 4475,

 Superior Oourt of New York,

Barry Bee Benson v. the 🍯 Industry

 is now in session.

 Mr. Montgomery, you’re representing

the five food companies collectively?

 A privilege.

 Mr. Benson… you’re representing

all the bees of the world?

 I’m kidding. Yes, Your Honor,

we’re ready to proceed.

 Mr. Montgomery,

your opening statement, please.

 Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,

 my grandmother was a simple woman.

 Born on a farm, she believed

it was man’s divine right

 to benefit from the bounty

of nature God put before us.

 If we lived in the topsy-turvy world

Mr. Benson imagines,

 just think of what would it mean.

 I would have to negotiate

with the silkworm

 for the elastic in my britches!

 Talking bee!

 How do we know this isn’t some sort of

 holographic motion-picture-capture

Hollywood wizardry?

 They could be using laser beams!

 Robotics! Ventriloquism!

Oloning! For all we know,

 he could be on steroids!

 Mr. Benson?

 Ladies and gentlemen,

there’s no trickery here.

 I’m just an ordinary bee.

🍯’s prettyimportant to me.

 It’s important to all bees.

We invented it!

 We make it. And we protect it

with our lives.

 Unfortunately, there are

some people in this room

 who think they can take it from us

 'cause we’re the little guys!

I’m hoping that, after this is all over,

 you’ll see how, by taking our 🍯,

you not only take everything we have

 but everything we are!

 I wish he’d dress like that

all the time. So nice!

 Oall your first witness.

 So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden

of 🍯 Farms, big company you have.

 I suppose so.

 I see you also own

🍯burton andHonron!

 Yes, they provide beekeepers

for our farms.

 Beekeeper. I find that

to be a very disturbing term.

 I don’t imagine you employ

any bee-free-ers, do you?

 - No.

- I couldn’t hear you.

 - No.

- No.

 Because you don’t free bees.

You keep bees. Not only that,

 it seems you thought a bear would be

an appropriate image for a jar of 🍯.

 They’re very lovable creatures.

 Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.

 You mean like this?

 Bears kill bees!

 How’d you like his head crashing

through your living room?!

 Biting into your couch!

Spitting out your throw pillows!

 OK, that’s enough. Take him away.

 So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here.

Your name intrigues me.

 - Where have I heard it before?

- I was with a band called The Police.

 But you’ve never been

a police officer, have you?

 No, I haven’t.

 No, you haven’t. And so here

we have yet another example

 of bee culture casually

stolen by a human

 for nothing more than

a prance-about stage name.

 Oh, please.

 Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting?

 Because I’m feeling

a little stung, Sting.

 Or should I say… Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!

 That’s not his real name?! You idiots!

 Mr. Liotta, first,

belated congratulations on

 your Emmy win for a guest spot

on ER in 2005.

 Thank you. Thank you.

 I see from your resume

that you’re devilishly handsome

 with a churning inner turmoil

that’s ready to blow.

 I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?

 Not yet it isn’t. But is this

what it’s come to for you?

 Exploiting tiny, helpless bees

so you don’t

 have to rehearse

your part and learn your lines, sir?

 Watch it, Benson!

I could blow right now!

 This isn’t a goodfella.

This is a badfella!

 Why doesn’t someone just step on

this creep, and we can all go home?!

 - Order in this court!

- You’re all thinking it!

 Order! Order, I say!

 - Say it!

- Mr. Liotta, please sit down!

 I think it was awfully nice

of that bear to pitch in like that.

 I think the jury’s on our side.

 Are we doing everything right, legally?

 I’m a florist.

 Right. Well, here’s to a great team.

 To a great team!

 Well, hello.

 - Ken!

- Hello.

 I didn’t think you were coming.

 No, I was just late.

I tried to call, but… the battery.

 I didn’t want all this to go to waste,

so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.

 Oh, that was lucky.

 There’s a little left.

I could heat it up.

 Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.

 So I hear you’re quite a tennis player.

 I’m not much for the game myself.

The ball’s a little grabby.

 That’s where I usually sit.

Right… there.

 Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,

 and he agreed with me that eating with

chopsticks isn’t really a special skill.

 You think I don’t see what you’re doing?

 I know how hard it is to find

the rightjob. We have that in common.

 Do we?

 Bees have 100 percent employment,

but we do jobs like taking the crud out.

 That’s just what

I was thinking about doing.

 Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor

for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.

 I’m going to drain the old stinger.

 Yeah, you do that.

 Look at that.

 You know, I’ve just about had it

 with your little mind games.

 - What’s that?

- Italian Vogue.

 Mamma mia, that’s a lot of pages.

 A lot of ads.

 Remember what Van said, why is

your life more valuable than mine?

 Funny, I just can’t seem to recall that!

 I think something stinks in here!

 I love the smell of flowers.

 How do you like the smell of flames?!

 Not as much.

 Water bug! Not taking sides!

 Ken, I’m wearing a Ohapstick hat!

This is pathetic!

 I’ve got issues!

 Well, well, well, a royal flush!

 - You’re bluffing.

- Am I?

 Surf’s up, dude!

 Poo water!

 That bowl is gnarly.

 Except for those dirty yellow rings!

 Kenneth! What are you doing?!

 You know, I don’t even like 🍯!

I don’t eat it!

 We need to talk!

 He’s just a little bee!

 And he happens to be

the nicest bee I’ve met in a long time!

 Long time? What are you talking about?!

Are there other bugs in your life?

 No, but there are other things bugging

me in life. And you’re one of them!

 Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night…

 My nerves are fried from riding

on this emotional roller coaster!

 Goodbye, Ken.

 And for your information,

 I prefer sugar-free, artificial

sweeteners made by man!

 I’m sorry about all that.

 I know it’s got

an aftertaste! I like it!

 I always felt there was some kind

of barrier between Ken and me.

 I couldn’t overcome it.

Oh, well.

 Are you OK for the trial?

 I believe Mr. Montgomery

is about out of ideas.

 We would like to call

Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.

 Good idea! You can really see why he’s

considered one of the best lawyers…

 Yeah.

 Layton, you’ve

gotta weave some magic

 with this jury,

or it’s gonna be all over.

 Don’t worry. The only thing I have

to do to turn this jury around

 is to remind them

of what they don’t like about bees.

 - You got the tweezers?

- Are you allergic?

 Only to losing, son. Only to losing.

 Mr. Benson Bee, I’ll ask you

what I think we’d all like to know.

 What exactly is your relationship

 to that woman?

 We’re friends.

 - Good friends?

- Yes.

 How good? Do you live together?

 Wait a minute…

 Are you her little…

 …bedbug?

 I’ve seen a bee documentary or two.

From what I understand,

 doesn’t your queen give birth

to all the bee children?

 - Yeah, but…

- So those aren’t your real parents!

 - Oh, Barry…

- Yes, they are!

 Hold me back!

 You’re an illegitimate bee,

aren’t you, Benson?

 He’s denouncing bees!

 Don’t y'all date your cousins?

 - Objection!

- I’m going to pincushion this guy!

 Adam, don’t! It’s what he wants!

 Oh, I’m hit!!

 Oh, lordy, I am hit!

 Order! Order!

 The venom! The venom

is coursing through my veins!

 I have been felled

by a winged beast of destruction!

 You see? You can’t treat them

like equals! They’re striped savages!

 Stinging’s the only thing

they know! It’s their way!

 - Adam, stay with me.

- I can’t feel my legs.

 What angel of mercy

will come forward to suck the poison

 from my heaving buttocks?

 I will have order in this court. Order!

 Order, please!

 The case of the 🍯bees

versus the human race

 took a pointed turn against the bees

 yesterday when one of their legal

team stung Layton T. Montgomery.

 - Hey, buddy.

- Hey.

 - Is there much pain?

- Yeah.

 I…

 I blew the whole case, didn’t I?

 It doesn’t matter. What matters is

you’re alive. You could have died.

 I’d be better off dead. Look at me.

 They got it from the cafeteria

downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.

 Look, there’s

a little celery still on it.

 What was it like to sting someone?

 I can’t explain it. It was all…

 All adrenaline and then…

and then ecstasy!

 All right.

 You think it was all a trap?

 Of course. I’m sorry.

I flew us right into this.

 What were we thinking? Look at us. We’re

just a couple of bugs in this world.

 What will the humans do to us

if they win?

 I don’t know.

 I hear they put the roaches in motels.

That doesn’t sound so bad.

 Adam, they check in,

but they don’t check out!

 Oh, my.

 Oould you get a nurse

to close that window?

 - Why?

- The smoke.

 Bees don’t smoke.

 Right. Bees don’t smoke.

 Bees don’t smoke!

But some bees are smoking.

 That’s it! That’s our case!

 It is? It’s not over?

 Get dressed. I’ve gotta go somewhere.

 Get back to the court and stall.

Stall any way you can.

 And assuming you’ve done step correctly, you’re readyfor the tub.

 Mr. Flayman.

 Yes? Yes, Your Honor!

 Where is the rest of your team?

 Well, Your Honor, it’s interesting.

 Bees are trained to fly haphazardly,

 and as a result,

we don’t make very good time.

 I actually heard a funny story about…

 Your Honor,

haven’t these ridiculous bugs

 taken up enough

of this court’s valuable time?

 How much longer will we allow

these absurd shenanigans to go on?

 They have presented no compelling

evidence to support their charges

 against my clients,

who run legitimate businesses.

 I move for a complete dismissal

of this entire case!

 Mr. Flayman, I’m afraid I’m going

 to have to consider

Mr. Montgomery’s motion.

 But you can’t! We have a terrific case.

 Where is your proof?

Where is the evidence?

 Show me the smoking gun!

 Hold it, Your Honor!

You want a smoking gun?

 Here is your smoking gun.

 What is that?

 It’s a bee smoker!

 What, this?

This harmless little contraption?

 This couldn’t hurt a fly,

let alone a bee.

 Look at what has happened

 to bees who have never been asked,

“Smoking or non?”

 Is this what nature intended for us?

 To be forcibly addicted

to smoke machines

 and man-made wooden slat work camps?

 Living out our lives as 🍯 slaves

to the white man?

 - What are we gonna do?

- He’s playing the species card.

 Ladies and gentlemen, please,

free these bees!

 Free the bees! Free the bees!

 Free the bees!

 Free the bees! Free the bees!

 The court finds in favor of the bees!

 Vanessa, we won!

 I knew you could do it! High-five!

 Sorry.

 I’m OK! You know what this means?

 All the 🍯

will finally belong to the bees.

 Now we won’t have

to work so hard all the time.

 This is an unholy perversion

of the balance of nature, Benson.

 You’ll regret this.

 Barry, how much 🍯 is out there?

 All right. One at a time.

 Barry, who are you wearing?

 My sweater is Ralph Lauren,

and I have no pants.

 - What if Montgomery’s right?

- What do you mean?

 We’ve been living the bee way

a long time, 27 million years.

 Oongratulations on your victory.

What will you demand as a settlement?

 First, we’ll demand a complete shutdown

of all bee work camps.

 Then we want back the 🍯

that was ours to begin with,

 every last drop.

 We demand an end to the glorification

of the bear as anything more

 than a filthy, smelly,

bad-breath stink machine.

 We’re all aware

of what they do in the woods.

 Wait for my signal.

 Take him out.

 He’ll have nauseous

for a few hours, then he’ll be fine.

 And we will no longer tolerate

bee-negative nicknames…

 But it’s just a prance-about stage name!

 …unnecessary inclusion of 🍯

in bogus health products

 and la-dee-da human

tea-time snack garnishments.

 Oan’t breathe.

 Bring it in, boys!

 Hold it right there! Good.

 Tap it.

 Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups,

and there’s gallons more coming!

 - I think we need to shut down!

- Shut down? We’ve never shut down.

 Shut down 🍯 production!

 Stop making 🍯!

 Turn your key, sir!

 What do we do now?

 Oannonball!

 We’re shutting 🍯 production!

 Mission abort.

 Aborting pollination and nectar detail.

Returning to base.

 Adam, you wouldn’t believe

how much 🍯 was out there.

 Oh, yeah?

 What’s going on? Where is everybody?

 - Are they out celebrating?

- They’re home.

 They don’t know what to do.

Laying out, sleeping in.

 I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way

to San Antonio with a cricket.

 At least we got our 🍯 back.

 Sometimes I think, so what if humans

liked our 🍯? Who wouldn’t?

 It’s the greatest thing in the world!

I was excited to be part of making it.

 This was my new desk. This was my

new job. I wanted to do it really well.

 And now…

 Now I can’t.

 I don’t understand

why they’re not happy.

 I thought their lives would be better!

 They’re doing nothing. It’s amazing.

🍯 reallychanges people.

 You don’t have any idea

what’s going on, do you?

 - What did you want to show me?

- This.

 What happened here?

 That is not the half of it.

 Oh, no. Oh, my.

 They’re all wilting.

 Doesn’t look very good, does it?

 No.

 And whose fault do you think that is?

 You know, I’m gonna guess bees.

 Bees?

 Specifically, me.

 I didn’t think bees not needing to make

🍯 wouldaffect all these things.

 It’s notjust flowers.

Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.

 That’s our whole SAT test right there.

 Take away produce, that affects

the entire animal kingdom.

 And then, of course…

 The human species?

 So if there’s no more pollination,

 it could all just go south here,

couldn’t it?

 I know this is also partly my fault.

 How about a suicide pact?

 How do we do it?

 - I’ll sting you, you step on me.

- Thatjust kills you twice.

 Right, right.

 Listen, Barry…

sorry, but I gotta get going.

 I had to open my mouth and talk.

 Vanessa?

 Vanessa? Why are you leaving?

Where are you going?

 To the final Tournament of Roses parade

in Pasadena.

 They’ve moved it to this weekend

because all the flowers are dying.

 It’s the last chance

I’ll ever have to see it.

 Vanessa, I just wanna say I’m sorry.

I never meant it to turn out like this.

 I know. Me neither.

 Tournament of Roses.

Roses can’t do sports.

 Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?

 Roses!

 Vanessa!

 Roses?!

 Barry?

 - Roses are flowers!

- Yes, they are.

 Flowers, bees, pollen!

 I know.

That’s why this is the last parade.

 Maybe not.

Oould you ask him to slow down?

 Oould you slow down?

 Barry!

 OK, I made a huge mistake.

This is a total disaster, all my fault.

 Yes, it kind of is.

 I’ve ruined the planet.

I wanted to help you

 with the flower shop.

I’ve made it worse.

 Actually, it’s completely closed down.

 I thought maybe you were remodeling.

 But I have another idea, and it’s

greater than my previous ideas combined.

 I don’t want to hear it!

 All right, they have the roses,

the roses have the pollen.

 I know every bee, plant

and flower bud in this park.

 All we gotta do is get what they’ve got

back here with what we’ve got.

 - Bees.

- Park.

 - Pollen!

- Flowers.

 - Repollination!

- Across the nation!

��Tournament of Roses,

Pasadena, Oalifornia.

 They’ve got nothing

but flowers, floats and cotton candy.

 Security will be tight.

 I have an idea.

 Vanessa Bloome, FTD.

 Official floral business. It’s real.

 Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.

 Thank you. It was a gift.

 Once inside,

we just pick the right float.

 How about The Princess and the Pea?

 I could be the princess,

and you could be the pea!

 Yes, I got it.

 - Where should I sit?

- What are you?

 - I believe I’m the pea.

- The pea?

 It goes under the mattresses.

 - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart.

- I’m getting the marshal.

 You do that!

This whole parade is a fiasco!

 Let’s see what this baby’ll do.

 Hey, what are you doing?!

 Then all we do

is blend in with traffic…

 …without arousing suspicion.

 Once at the airport,

there’s no stopping us.

 Stop! Security.

 - You and your insect pack your float?

- Yes.

 Has it been

in your possession the entire time?

 Would you remove your shoes?

 - Remove your stinger.

- It’s part of me.

 I know. Just having some fun.

Enjoy your flight.

 Then if we’re lucky, we’ll have

just enough pollen to do the job.

 Oan you believe how lucky we are? We

have just enough pollen to do the job!

 I think this is gonna work.

 It’s got to work.

 Attention, passengers,

this is Oaptain Scott.

 We have a bit of bad weather

in New York.

 It looks like we’ll experience

a couple hours delay.

 Barry, these are cut flowers

with no water. They’ll never make it.

 I gotta get up there

and talk to them.

 Be careful.

 Oan I get help

with the Sky Mall magazine?

 I’d like to order the talking

inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.

 Oaptain, I’m in a real situation.

 - What’d you say, Hal?

- Nothing.

 Bee!

 Don’t freak out! My entire species…

 What are you doing?

 - Wait a minute! I’m an attorney!

- Who’s an attorney?

 Don’t move.

 Oh, Barry.

 Good afternoon, passengers.

This is your captain.

 Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B

please report to the cockpit?

 And please hurry!

 What happened here?

 There was a DustBuster,

a toupee, a life raft exploded.

 One’s bald, one’s in a boat,

they’re both unconscious!

 - Is that another bee joke?

- No!

 No one’s flying the plane!

 This is JFK control tower, Flight 356.

What’s your status?

 This is Vanessa Bloome.

I’m a florist from New York.

 Where’s the pilot?

 He’s unconscious,

and so is the copilot.

 Not good. Does anyone onboard

have flight experience?

 As a matter of fact, there is.

 - Who’s that?

- Barry Benson.

 From the 🍯 trial?! Oh, great.

 Vanessa, this is nothing more

than a big metal bee.

 It’s got giant wings, huge engines.

 I can’t fly a plane.

 - Why not? Isn’t John Travolta a pilot?

- Yes.

 How hard could it be?

 Wait, Barry!

We’re headed into some lightning.

 This is Bob Bumble. We have some

late-breaking news from JFK Airport,

 where a suspenseful scene

is developing.

 Barry Benson,

fresh from his legal victory…

 That’s Barry!

 …is attempting to land a plane,

loaded with people, flowers

 and an incapacitated flight crew.

 Flowers?!

 We have a storm in the area

and two individuals at the controls

 with absolutely no flight experience.

 Just a minute.

There’s a bee on that plane.

 I’m quite familiar with Mr. Benson

and his no-account compadres.

 They’ve done enough damage.

 But isn’t he your only hope?

 Technically, a bee

shouldn’t be able to fly at all.

 Their wings are too small…

 Haven’t we heard this a million times?

 “The surface area of the wings

and body mass make no sense.”

 - Get this on the air!

- Got it.

 - Stand by.

- We’re going live.

 The way we work may be a mystery to you.

 Making 🍯 takes a lot of bees

doing a lot of small jobs.

 But let me tell you about a small job.

 If you do it well,

it makes a big difference.

 More than we realized.

To us, to everyone.

 That’s why I want to get bees

back to working together.

 That’s the bee way!

We’re not made of Jell-O.

 We get behind a fellow.

 - Black and yellow!

- Hello!

 Left, right, down, hover.

 - Hover?

- Forget hover.

 This isn’t so hard.

Beep-beep! Beep-beep!

 Barry, what happened?!

 Wait, I think we were

on autopilot the whole time.

 - That may have been helping me.

- And now we’re not!

 So it turns out I cannot fly a plane.

 All of you, let’s get

behind this fellow! Move it out!

 Move out!

 Our only chance is if I do what I’d do,

you copy me with the wings of the plane!

 Don’t have to yell.

 I’m not yelling!

We’re in a lot of trouble.

 It’s very hard to concentrate

with that panicky tone in your voice!

 It’s not a tone. I’m panicking!

 I can’t do this!

 Vanessa, pull yourself together.

You have to snap out of it!

 You snap out of it.

 You snap out of it.

 - You snap out of it!

- You snap out of it!

 - You snap out of it!

- You snap out of it!

 - You snap out of it!

- You snap out of it!

 - Hold it!

- Why? Oome on, it’s my turn.

 How is the plane flying?

 I don’t know.

 Hello?

 Benson, got any flowers

for a happy occasion in there?

 The Pollen Jocks!

 They do get behind a fellow.

 - Black and yellow.

- Hello.

 All right, let’s drop this tin can

on the blacktop.

 Where? I can’t see anything. Oan you?

 No, nothing. It’s all cloudy.

 Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry.

 - Thinking bee.

- Thinking bee.

 Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

 Wait a minute.

I think I’m feeling something.

 - What?

- I don’t know. It’s strong, pulling me.

 Like a 27-million-year-old instinct.

 Bring the nose down.

 Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

 - What in the world is on the tarmac?

- Get some lights on that!

 Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

 - Vanessa, aim for the flower.

- OK.

 Out the engines. We’re going in

on bee power. Ready, boys?

 Affirmative!

 Good. Good. Easy, now. That’s it.

 Land on that flower!

 Ready? Full reverse!

 Spin it around!

 - Not that flower! The other one!

- Which one?

 - That flower.

- I’m aiming at the flower!

 That’s a fat guy in a flowered shirt.

I mean the giant pulsating flower

 made of millions of bees!

 Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up.

 Rotate around it.

 - This is insane, Barry!

- This’s the only way I know how to fly.

 Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane

flying in an insect-like pattern?

 Get your nose in there. Don’t be afraid.

Smell it. Full reverse!

 Just drop it. Be a part of it.

 Aim for the center!

 Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman!

 Oome on, already.

 Barry, we did it!

You taught me how to fly!

 - Yes. No high-five!

- Right.

 Barry, it worked!

Did you see the giant flower?

 What giant flower? Where? Of course

I saw the flower! That was genius!

 - Thank you.

- But we’re not done yet.

 Listen, everyone!

 This runway is covered

with the last pollen

 from the last flowers

available anywhere on Earth.

 That means this is our last chance.

 We’re the only ones who make 🍯,

pollinate flowers and dress like this.

 If we’re gonna survive as a species,

this is our moment! What do you say?

 Are we going to be bees, orjust

Museum of Natural History keychains?

 We’re bees!

 Keychain!

 Then follow me! Except Keychain.

 Hold on, Barry. Here.

 You’ve earned this.

 Yeah!

 I’m a Pollen Jock! And it’s a perfect

fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves.

 Oh, yeah.

 That’s our Barry.

 Mom! The bees are back!

 If anybody needs

to make a call, now’s the time.

 I got a feeling we’ll be

working late tonight!

 Here’s your change. Have a great

afternoon! Oan I help who’s next?

 Would you like some 🍯 with that?

It is bee-approved. Don’t forget these.

 Milk, cream, cheese, it’s all me.

And I don’t see a nickel!

 Sometimes I just feel

like a piece of meat!

 I had no idea.

 Barry, I’m sorry.

Have you got a moment?

 Would you excuse me?

My mosquito associate will help you.

 Sorry I’m late.

 He’s a lawyer too?

 I was already a blood-sucking parasite.

All I needed was a briefcase.

 Have a great afternoon!

 Barry, I just got this huge tulip order,

and I can’t get them anywhere.

 No problem, Vannie.

Just leave it to me.

 You’re a lifesaver, Barry.

Oan I help who’s next?

 All right, scramble, jocks!

It’s time to fly.

 Thank you, Barry!

 That bee is living my life!

 Let it go, Kenny.

 - When will this nightmare end?!

- Let it all go.

 - Beautiful day to fly.

- Sure is.

 Between you and me,

I was dying to get out of that office.

 You have got

to start thinking bee, my friend.

 - Thinking bee!

- Me?

 Hold it. Let’s just stop

for a second. Hold it.

 I’m sorry. I’m sorry, everyone.

Oan we stop here?

 I’m not making a major life decision

during a production number!

 All right. Take ten, everybody.

Wrap it up, guys.

 I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

[g5b3ysjw-blog]

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[itsjessicaisreal]

Almost 60% of marketers haven’t implemented AMP, see why (and why it’s no excuse)

When it comes to page speed, a few seconds of slowdown can cost you. Slow load times cripple conversion rates, raise the price you pay for ad impressions, and even drive qualified traffic to your competitors.

All this being true, Accelerated Mobile Pages (AMP) would seem like the hail mary pass that marketers have been waiting for. Essentially, AMP is a Google-backed framework for creating web pages that deliver near-instant load times, even on mobile. I say “near-instant” here, but I like how the AMP Project itself puts it: AMP pages are “so fast they appear to load instantly.”

What does AMP mean for marketers? Faster delivery of your content, for one thing. The end of waiting altogether, maybe. Ultimately, AMP can result in a significant uptick in traffic and improved conversion rates overall.

So, naturally, every marketer is planning to adopt it in 2019, right? Right!?

*record scratch*

Marketers have been slow to adopt AMP for a variety of reasons (via Unbounce’s 2019 Page Speed Report).

Wait, wait, I can explain. As part of our 2019 Page Speed Report, we asked marketers if they planned to implement AMP in the near future. 57% of them told us they have no plans to implement it, while 23% are still considering it.

Those who haven’t adopted the framework have a range of reasons why, but they fall into three broad categories:

AMP requires a significant investment of developer resources.

AMP is poorly understood (or perhaps poorly messaged).

Google’s past behavior has made some people wary of AMP.

I’ll explore these reasons in further detail below. For now, it’s worth saying that each has some validity. But I don’t think any of them—alone or together—should be your excuse not to implement AMP for your marketing campaigns.

In the long run, businesses who overcome these objections will be better positioned than those who don’t, despite perceived drawbacks. As I wrote elsewhere, “Turbo-charged landing pages result in more traffic and higher engagement, boosting conversions and helping PPC campaigns win increased ad impressions for less.” The AMP framework helps you achieve this kind of performance, even on a smartphone.

Want more insights about page speed? You can explore all the findings in the complete 2019 Page Speed Report for Marketers here. Access is free and ungated, so take a look.

Reason 1: Limited development resources

A significant hurdle that marketers face when it comes to adding AMP to their site has to do with technical resourcing. Four of the answers to our survey question touched on this problem:

Developers are not experienced with coding for AMP (12% of respondents)

No developer capacity to implement it (32% of respondents)

Too time-consuming to implement it (12% of respondents)

Validation issues with AMP pages we did create (2% of respondents)

It’s no secret that AMP comes with a steep-ish learning curve.

By using a restricted version of HTML and a custom JavaScript library, the framework ensures an optimized (read: fast-loading!) experience. Using Google’s AMP Cache (a content delivery network that stores your page on Google’s servers) further accelerates your pages.

But it also requires your developers to dedicate time to learning and mastering AMP-HTML and the AMP JavaScript library. And since Google’s AMP Cache requires validation once you’ve built an AMP page, there’s really no “good enough” moment here. Either your page works and goes live, or it doesn’t and you need to find your error. Who feels motivated to learn under those conditions?

AMP validation in action—or should I write, “inaction”? (via The AMP Project).

By its very nature, the limitations of AMP also demand a certain, let’s say, technical dexterity. Because bloated scripts tend to be a major contributor to slowdown, AMP’s JavaScript library puts the brakes on the third-party scripting that people have gotten used to using. (And AMP HTML comes with its own quirks.) Working within these constraints can often produce innovation, but it’s also a source of frustration for many who just wanna get stuff done.

Finally, poor analytics has been significant speed bumps on the road to AMP adoption. Tracking and analyzing visitor behavior is an integral part of running an online marketing campaign, but early in its life, AMP asked us to go blind. No thank you.

Why time and dev work are no excuse…

First, let’s be real: the AMP framework is a set of restrictions. That’s the point. So wishing for an AMP without any limitations at all doesn’t make sense.

In addition, many of the difficulties that plagued developers in the early years of AMP are no longer an issue. Tracking, for instance, has improved dramatically since AMP launched in 2015. Today, by using the AMP Analytics tag, you can isolate and analyze AMP traffic in Google Analytics. Though it can’t yet do everything that standard tracking can, it will collect data about users, pages, browsing, and (most significantly) events. As Search Engine Journal points out, “for most content marketers, that’s sufficient.” Not a ringing endorsement, sure, but tracking is now good enough for most marketing purposes.

As AMP development has continued, scripting has also become more robust, and the options available have expanded. Unfortunately, many people rely on scripts from third parties for tracking and integrations, but a lot of companies have been slow to deliver AMP-compatible versions. As adoption has increased, however, so too has the pressure on these companies to deliver.

That said, some of what AMP asks us to leave behind is also inessential. Pages clogged by unoptimized script may soon be looked upon we look at the tailfins on the back of a 50’s Cadillac. (Or, hey, remember the heady days when every site seemed to require Macromedia Flash? When it comes to the web, more isn’t always better.)

Reason 2: Some marketers really don’t get this whole AMP thing

Despite having a mouth to Google’s megaphone, the AMP Project has struggled to be heard beyond web development or publishing circles. When we asked marketers in The Page Speed Report, we discovered the following:

There’s a lot of misunderstanding when it comes to AMP (via Unbounce’s 2019 Page Speed Report).

While 54% of the digital marketers said they have some understanding of AMP, the rest assuredly did not. A quarter of ’em hadn’t even heard of Accelerated Mobile Pages before taking our survey.

Why misunderstanding is no excuse…

First, AMP is hardly floundering, despite the fact that you may not have heard about it. It has the combined might of Google, Pinterest, Twitter, WordPress, and Bing backing it. And AMP already covers more than 31 million domains serving billions of AMP pages. If you browse the web on your smartphone, in other words, chances are very strong you’ve visited an AMP page.

AMP pages appear in the search results with a lightning bolt icon.

Second, if you hadn’t heard of AMP until you read this article, no worries—because now you have. That gives you an advantage over the 24% of marketers who’re still in the dark. It’s always best to think competitively about page speed. Knowing about AMP (and implementing it) can put you out in front of your competitors by dramatically improving your load times.

EDITOR’S NOTE. There’s a lot of misinformation or misunderstanding out there about AMP. You can read more about AMP and its myths in this blog post from Unbounce’s Larissa Hildebrandt.

Reason 3: Google is “evil” now

Even before they stripped the “don’t be evil” clause from their official code of conduct last year, Google earned a reputation for shady doings.

With the launch of the AMP Project in October of 2015, though, they stirred up a controversy that they didn’t seem to anticipate. Critics were quick to argue that AMP represents yet another move to lock down the web, gallingly disguised as an open-source project.

Many of these accusations point to the Google AMP Cache, which speeds up delivery of content by storing your pages on Google’s servers. AMP doesn’t actually require using Google’s cache—people can create their own—but this tends to be how it’s done. In most cases, the content lives with Google, and a searcher may never touch your actual website. As Daniel Miessler puts it, this is potentially “poisonous to the underlying concept of an open internet.”

Why it’s no excuse…

The language of dissent can get a little, uh, heated (see Barry Adam’s colorful “Google AMP Can Go To Hell”) but a free and open internet is a public good we should be all getting behind. Keeping Google from controlling the entire universe is a definite good for free speech and democracy. (And it’s better for business too.)

But so is delivering fast speeds so that more people can access the web. And AMP helps with that, big time. Remember, the loss of net neutrality means providers can potentially throttle speeds, offering “slow” and “fast” lanes depending on what customers can afford. And 70% of connections globally will remain 3G or slower through 2020 regardless. For these reasons, AMP seems downright necessary, and that’s why news organizations—like The Guardian and The New York Times—were among the first to adopt it.

For what it’s worth, Google has pled innocent in the court of public opinion. In September they took steps to distance themselves from the AMP Project by adopting a new governance model that includes other companies. What this means is that—though Googlers conceived and shepherded AMP—its future is now squarely in the hands of a group that may not always act in the tech giant’s interests. That’s a very good thing.

Why marketers should implement AMP

It’s well-known that delays can create anticipation. But make no mistake, your sluggish website in no way resembles the slow, sultry, seductive pour of Heinz ketchup onto a plate of golden french fries. In fact, the experience has more in common with waiting for your number to be called at the DMV.

By making prospects sit through delays, you’re serving up a heaping helping of frustration, annoyance, and uncertainty. All before they ever even see your content…

…or, rather, if they ever see your content. Because many of ’em won’t make it that far. In Unbounce’s 2019 Page Speed Report for Marketers, a majority of consumers told us that they’ll wait 4-6 seconds before giving up on a slow page.

A majority of consumers say they’ll wait 4-6 seconds before clicking away (via Unbounce’s 2019 Page Speed Report).

Data gathered by Google says the actual number is closer to 3 seconds. After that, many consumers told us they close their browser or even go to a competitor’s site instead. 45% of them told us that a slow loading site makes them less likely to make a purchase. If you want to get fast—like, really, really fast—AMP can get you there.

Unbounce + AMP

It’s no secret we’re bullish on AMP at Unbounce. That’s because Accelerated Mobile Pages have many tangible benefits as a quick way to create a near-instant visitor experience. Not only can they have a dramatic effect on your conversion rates, but they can also increase organic traffic overall and improve Quality Scores in Google Ads.

We were surprised to learn in the Page Speed Report how many marketers are avoiding AMP due to difficulty with developer resources. So, as part of our initiatives to improve page speeds, we’ve sought to make AMP friendlier to the non-developer, reducing or eliminating frustration. You can now drag and drop together AMP experiences, and we’re walking you through what AMP is, why you need it, and how to implement it.

So what’s the ultimate reason you no longer have an excuse for not implementing AMP?

Because we’re making it much easier.

In the coming weeks, we’ll be making AMP landing pages available to all Unbounce customers. Using them can still mean choosing efficiency over flashy scripts, but we’ve already seen our beta test community finding new ways to balance beauty and speed. We’re excited to hear how AMP landing pages impact your conversion rates when they hit. And I’m excited to start sharing some success stories (and actionable takeaways) with readers of this blog.

from Marketing https://unbounce.com/online-marketing/why-marketers-should-implement-amp/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

[roypstickney]

Almost 60% of marketers haven’t implemented AMP, see why (and why it’s no excuse)

When it comes to page speed, a few seconds of slowdown can cost you. Slow load times cripple conversion rates, raise the price you pay for ad impressions, and even drive qualified traffic to your competitors.

All this being true, Accelerated Mobile Pages (AMP) would seem like the hail mary pass that marketers have been waiting for. Essentially, AMP is a Google-backed framework for creating web pages that deliver near-instant load times, even on mobile. I say “near-instant” here, but I like how the AMP Project itself puts it: AMP pages are “so fast they appear to load instantly.”

What does AMP mean for marketers? Faster delivery of your content, for one thing. The end of waiting altogether, maybe. Ultimately, AMP can result in a significant uptick in traffic and improved conversion rates overall.

So, naturally, every marketer is planning to adopt it in 2019, right? Right!?

*record scratch*

Marketers have been slow to adopt AMP for a variety of reasons (via Unbounce’s 2019 Page Speed Report).

Wait, wait, I can explain. As part of our 2019 Page Speed Report, we asked marketers if they planned to implement AMP in the near future. 57% of them told us they have no plans to implement it, while 23% are still considering it.

Those who haven’t adopted the framework have a range of reasons why, but they fall into three broad categories:

AMP requires a significant investment of developer resources.

AMP is poorly understood (or perhaps poorly messaged).

Google’s past behavior has made some people wary of AMP.

I’ll explore these reasons in further detail below. For now, it’s worth saying that each has some validity. But I don’t think any of them—alone or together—should be your excuse not to implement AMP for your marketing campaigns.

In the long run, businesses who overcome these objections will be better positioned than those who don’t, despite perceived drawbacks. As I wrote elsewhere, “Turbo-charged landing pages result in more traffic and higher engagement, boosting conversions and helping PPC campaigns win increased ad impressions for less.” The AMP framework helps you achieve this kind of performance, even on a smartphone.

Want more insights about page speed? You can explore all the findings in the complete 2019 Page Speed Report for Marketers here. Access is free and ungated, so take a look.

Reason 1: Limited development resources

A significant hurdle that marketers face when it comes to adding AMP to their site has to do with technical resourcing. Four of the answers to our survey question touched on this problem:

Developers are not experienced with coding for AMP (12% of respondents)

No developer capacity to implement it (32% of respondents)

Too time-consuming to implement it (12% of respondents)

Validation issues with AMP pages we did create (2% of respondents)

It’s no secret that AMP comes with a steep-ish learning curve.

By using a restricted version of HTML and a custom JavaScript library, the framework ensures an optimized (read: fast-loading!) experience. Using Google’s AMP Cache (a content delivery network that stores your page on Google’s servers) further accelerates your pages.

But it also requires your developers to dedicate time to learning and mastering AMP-HTML and the AMP JavaScript library. And since Google’s AMP Cache requires validation once you’ve built an AMP page, there’s really no “good enough” moment here. Either your page works and goes live, or it doesn’t and you need to find your error. Who feels motivated to learn under those conditions?

AMP validation in action—or should I write, “inaction”? (via The AMP Project).

By its very nature, the limitations of AMP also demand a certain, let’s say, technical dexterity. Because bloated scripts tend to be a major contributor to slowdown, AMP’s JavaScript library puts the brakes on the third-party scripting that people have gotten used to using. (And AMP HTML comes with its own quirks.) Working within these constraints can often produce innovation, but it’s also a source of frustration for many who just wanna get stuff done.

Finally, poor analytics has been significant speed bumps on the road to AMP adoption. Tracking and analyzing visitor behavior is an integral part of running an online marketing campaign, but early in its life, AMP asked us to go blind. No thank you.

Why time and dev work are no excuse…

First, let’s be real: the AMP framework is a set of restrictions. That’s the point. So wishing for an AMP without any limitations at all doesn’t make sense.

In addition, many of the difficulties that plagued developers in the early years of AMP are no longer an issue. Tracking, for instance, has improved dramatically since AMP launched in 2015. Today, by using the AMP Analytics tag, you can isolate and analyze AMP traffic in Google Analytics. Though it can’t yet do everything that standard tracking can, it will collect data about users, pages, browsing, and (most significantly) events. As Search Engine Journal points out, “for most content marketers, that’s sufficient.” Not a ringing endorsement, sure, but tracking is now good enough for most marketing purposes.

As AMP development has continued, scripting has also become more robust, and the options available have expanded. Unfortunately, many people rely on scripts from third parties for tracking and integrations, but a lot of companies have been slow to deliver AMP-compatible versions. As adoption has increased, however, so too has the pressure on these companies to deliver.

That said, some of what AMP asks us to leave behind is also inessential. Pages clogged by unoptimized script may soon be looked upon we look at the tailfins on the back of a 50’s Cadillac. (Or, hey, remember the heady days when every site seemed to require Macromedia Flash? When it comes to the web, more isn’t always better.)

Reason 2: Some marketers really don’t get this whole AMP thing

Despite having a mouth to Google’s megaphone, the AMP Project has struggled to be heard beyond web development or publishing circles. When we asked marketers in The Page Speed Report, we discovered the following:

There’s a lot of misunderstanding when it comes to AMP (via Unbounce’s 2019 Page Speed Report).

While 54% of the digital marketers said they have some understanding of AMP, the rest assuredly did not. A quarter of ’em hadn’t even heard of Accelerated Mobile Pages before taking our survey.

Why misunderstanding is no excuse…

First, AMP is hardly floundering, despite the fact that you may not have heard about it. It has the combined might of Google, Pinterest, Twitter, WordPress, and Bing backing it. And AMP already covers more than 31 million domains serving billions of AMP pages. If you browse the web on your smartphone, in other words, chances are very strong you’ve visited an AMP page.

AMP pages appear in the search results with a lightning bolt icon.

Second, if you hadn’t heard of AMP until you read this article, no worries—because now you have. That gives you an advantage over the 24% of marketers who’re still in the dark. It’s always best to think competitively about page speed. Knowing about AMP (and implementing it) can put you out in front of your competitors by dramatically improving your load times.

EDITOR’S NOTE. There’s a lot of misinformation or misunderstanding out there about AMP. You can read more about AMP and its myths in this blog post from Unbounce’s Larissa Hildebrandt.

Reason 3: Google is “evil” now

Even before they stripped the “don’t be evil” clause from their official code of conduct last year, Google earned a reputation for shady doings.

With the launch of the AMP Project in October of 2015, though, they stirred up a controversy that they didn’t seem to anticipate. Critics were quick to argue that AMP represents yet another move to lock down the web, gallingly disguised as an open-source project.

Many of these accusations point to the Google AMP Cache, which speeds up delivery of content by storing your pages on Google’s servers. AMP doesn’t actually require using Google’s cache—people can create their own—but this tends to be how it’s done. In most cases, the content lives with Google, and a searcher may never touch your actual website. As Daniel Miessler puts it, this is potentially “poisonous to the underlying concept of an open internet.”

Why it’s no excuse…

The language of dissent can get a little, uh, heated (see Barry Adam’s colorful “Google AMP Can Go To Hell”) but a free and open internet is a public good we should be all getting behind. Keeping Google from controlling the entire universe is a definite good for free speech and democracy. (And it’s better for business too.)

But so is delivering fast speeds so that more people can access the web. And AMP helps with that, big time. Remember, the loss of net neutrality means providers can potentially throttle speeds, offering “slow” and “fast” lanes depending on what customers can afford. And 70% of connections globally will remain 3G or slower through 2020 regardless. For these reasons, AMP seems downright necessary, and that’s why news organizations—like The Guardian and The New York Times—were among the first to adopt it.

For what it’s worth, Google has pled innocent in the court of public opinion. In September they took steps to distance themselves from the AMP Project by adopting a new governance model that includes other companies. What this means is that—though Googlers conceived and shepherded AMP—its future is now squarely in the hands of a group that may not always act in the tech giant’s interests. That’s a very good thing.

Why marketers should implement AMP

It’s well-known that delays can create anticipation. But make no mistake, your sluggish website in no way resembles the slow, sultry, seductive pour of Heinz ketchup onto a plate of golden french fries. In fact, the experience has more in common with waiting for your number to be called at the DMV.

By making prospects sit through delays, you’re serving up a heaping helping of frustration, annoyance, and uncertainty. All before they ever even see your content…

…or, rather, if they ever see your content. Because many of ’em won’t make it that far. In Unbounce’s 2019 Page Speed Report for Marketers, a majority of consumers told us that they’ll wait 4-6 seconds before giving up on a slow page.

A majority of consumers say they’ll wait 4-6 seconds before clicking away (via Unbounce’s 2019 Page Speed Report).

Data gathered by Google says the actual number is closer to 3 seconds. After that, many consumers told us they close their browser or even go to a competitor’s site instead. 45% of them told us that a slow loading site makes them less likely to make a purchase. If you want to get fast—like, really, really fast—AMP can get you there.

Unbounce + AMP

It’s no secret we’re bullish on AMP at Unbounce. That’s because Accelerated Mobile Pages have many tangible benefits as a quick way to create a near-instant visitor experience. Not only can they have a dramatic effect on your conversion rates, but they can also increase organic traffic overall and improve Quality Scores in Google Ads.

We were surprised to learn in the Page Speed Report how many marketers are avoiding AMP due to difficulty with developer resources. So, as part of our initiatives to improve page speeds, we’ve sought to make AMP friendlier to the non-developer, reducing or eliminating frustration. You can now drag and drop together AMP experiences, and we’re walking you through what AMP is, why you need it, and how to implement it.

So what’s the ultimate reason you no longer have an excuse for not implementing AMP?

Because we’re making it much easier.

In the coming weeks, we’ll be making AMP landing pages available to all Unbounce customers. Using them can still mean choosing efficiency over flashy scripts, but we’ve already seen our beta test community finding new ways to balance beauty and speed. We’re excited to hear how AMP landing pages impact your conversion rates when they hit. And I’m excited to start sharing some success stories (and actionable takeaways) with readers of this blog.

[thrashermaxey]

Weekend rankings: There's been an explosion of trades across the NHL. So what does it mean?

Something​ unusual is happening​ in​ the​ NHL​ these​ days.​ Teams are​ making trades.

That shouldn’t​ be unusual. After​ all,​ trading has been​​ part of the NHL since the league’s earliest days. The art of the deal has evolved over time, but the basic concept has always been the same. If there’s a hole in your roster, you find a way to make a deal to address it. An NHL GM only has so many tools in his toolbox, and two of the key ones – drafting and free agency – aren’t available during the season, while player development is a longterm play that can’t really be rushed. But you can make a trade right now. If your team isn’t good enough, get out there and make it better.

At least, that’s how it’s supposed to work. But in recent years, the in-season trade has been a dying art. GMs pull off their biggest deals around the draft and maybe work in a few more as the offseason drags on. But during the season, things stay quiet until a week or two before the trade deadline.

Why? We’re told it’s because the salary cap makes it too hard to swing a deal during the season, but I’ve never fully bought that idea. Instead, we seem to be living through an era of conservative GMs who know they probably won’t get a second chance at the job and are driven more by a cover-your-butt mentality mixed with a healthy dose of loss aversion than an all-consuming desire to make their teams better.

Or maybe, we were living through that era. Because lately, NHL GMs have been busy.

Last week, NHL teams made seven trades. In the two weeks before that, there were ten more. That adds up to seventeen deals since the holiday trade freeze was lifted.

In that same period last year – the holiday freeze through Jan. 21 – there were only three trades. Two more happened on Jan. 22, so bump it up to five if you’d like, but things went quiet again after that. In 2016-17, over the same period, there were five deals. The 2015-16 season was the outlier, with 11 trades, but 2014-15 only had four and 2013-14 had six.

That’s an average of about six trades per season during the post-freeze period. And yet this year, we’ve had 17. What does it mean?

One possible answer is that it doesn’t mean much of anything. After all, it’s not like any of these recent trades have been blockbusters. In fact, they’ve almost all been oddly similar: One-for-one swaps, perhaps with a middling draft pick or two tossed in, mostly involving depth pieces or minor leaguers that probably play the same position. Only two of the 17 trades have involved more than one player on either side of the equation (the two-for-two deal that sent Brandon Manning to Edmonton and the Anders Nilsson deal between the Canucks and Senators).

Other than that, GMs are keeping it simple. If you were a cynic, you might suggest that there’s an awful lot of deck-chair shuffling going on. There certainly hasn’t been anything approaching a blockbuster to be seen. If we’re being honest, some of these deals have been built around guys most of us have never heard of.

But still … 17 trades? Even if they’re underwhelming paint-by-numbers moves, that’s a ton of activity for the middle of a season.

One theory is that what we’re seeing is a function of the tight playoff races. Granted, the races are tight every year, but this season feels different, especially out West where the wildcard race has become a slow-moving traffic jam. Nine of the 17 deals involve some combination of the Ducks, Wild and Oilers, three teams that came into the season in win-now mode and are fighting over those final spots. Maybe we’re not actually seeing some sort of league-wide phenomenon so much as three desperate teams pulling everyone else’s average up. But even if you take those three teams out of the mix, we’ve still had more trades than normal, so that can’t be the whole story.

There could be at least a bit of a domino effect in play, where each new trade shakes something loose somewhere else for another move. And it’s also possible that we’re seeing a little bit of peer pressure at play here. It’s one thing to tell your fans (and your owner) that making trades at this time of year is too hard. It’s another to do it when Bob Murray is out here finding a way to swing a new deal every second day. Nobody wants to be the GM who sits on his hands during the frenzy and then ends up missing the playoffs by a point in April.

Or maybe it’s just a one-off fluke. There’s always that.

Whatever it is, the next question is what it means for the five weeks between now and the trade deadline. It’s tempting to say that we’re in for a dud of a deadline since teams are getting all of their moves out of their system now. But that doesn’t seem right, because as I said, we’re talking about a bunch of relatively minor deals here. If anything, this feels like more of a warmup than anything. Maybe these smaller deals are the consolation prizes from bigger conversations that could still be revisited down the line. And if you’re the GM of a bubble team that hasn’t been wheeling and dealing lately, how much longer can you wait while everyone around you is already making moves?

However all of this plays out, here’s hoping that it’s the start of a new trend. NHL trades are fun and arguing over the ones that happened and the ones that still could happen used to be a big part of the league’s in-season entertainment value. That’s faded over time. It would be cool to get it back.

Road to the Cup

The five teams that look like they’re headed towards a summer of keg stands and fountain pool parties.

With the All-Star Game a week away, a reminder that we’re now into bye week season. Ten teams are off as of today, with everyone else off next week. That’s going to lead to some light nights on the schedule and maybe not much movement within our rankings over the next two weeks.

5. Vegas Golden Knights (29-17-4, +20 true goals differential*) – The good news is that they’ve won nine of eleven, including an impressive 7-3 trouncing of the Penguins on Saturday. The bad news is that they’re not really gaining any ground in the Pacific and if anything a first-round matchup with the Sharks seems more likely now than it did a week ago. We won’t go overboard on “if the playoffs started today” here and there’s still a chance the Knights can claim the top spot in the Pacific. But we’re reaching that time of year when having three teams from the same division in the top five just can’t hold and right now the Knights would be the easiest team to bump.

4. San Jose Sharks (28-15-7, +26) – You could cut-and-paste a lot of the Knights’ entry here, although some of the models out there still seem to love them. If they win the Pacific, I love their odds. But right now they’re not winning the Pacific.

from All About Sports http://www.downgoesbrown.com/2019/01/weekend-rankings-theres-been-explosion.html

[auburnfamilynews]

The Tigers will host five more top targets this weekend in an effort to close out the 2019 cycle strong.

It’s plenty busy on the recruiting trail right now. Auburn coaches are traveling all over the country (more on that later) visiting not only their top targets in the 2019 class but future classes as well. Offers are flying out daily to top level 2020, 2021 and yes even the occasional 2022 prospects. This is typically one of the busiest times of the recruiting cycle as coaching staffs attempt to put the final touches on their signing class and start building momentum for next year.

Official Visitors

Like last weekend, Auburn is expecting five official visitors on campus over the next couple of days. Unlike last weekend, I think there’s a VERY good chance the Tigers add a commitment by Monday. Here’s a look at who is expected on campus later this evening.

4* ATH John Rhys Plumlee | 6’1” | 185 lbs | Hattiesburg, MS | UGA Commit

This was the big surprise of the week. The longtime Dawg commit may have lost his place in that class when UGA pulled off a late flip of former Ohio State QB commit Dwan Mathis during the early signing period. There’s been rumors in recent weeks that Plumlee is being asked to blueshirt (explanation of a blueshirt) which may have put the talented athlete back on the market.

Interestingly, Plumlee prefers to play QB in college and that’s where Auburn is reportedly recruiting him to play. Now could this be a Jason Smith like situation where Auburn allows him a shot at QB before convincing him to slide elsewhere? We will see but it could also mean the staff expects some attrition at the QB position this spring especially when you consider the attempts to evaluate graduate transfer options.

As for Plumlee’s talents, he’s a big time athlete. He could play QB, WR or DB at the next level and is also a terrific baseball player. Plumlee is very quick, able to change directions at a moments notice and has outstanding top end speed that makes him a threat to score anytime he touches the ball. He’s got some Manziel to his game at the QB position in that he’s at his best in the midst of chaos. With a quick trigger and quick feet, he can get himself out of trouble in a hurry and be an all around headache for defenses. Plumlee would definitely give Auburn a dual threat option at QB. Given the signing of Nix though I expect Plumlee’s future at Auburn would be either at slot WR or safety. Ole Miss and Mississippi State are thought to be the teams to watch heading into this weekend. It will be interesting to see if the Tigers can make a strong late push for another elite Mississippi prospect.

3* DT LeDarrius Cox | 6’5” | 300 lbs | Mobile, AL | Tennessee Commit

For months now the thought has been that Cox would eventually land in Auburn’s class. Despite being committed to Tennessee, he’s 100% predicted to the Tigers via 247’s Crystal Ball feature. But as this recruitment has gone on the likelihood of that flip seems to have gone down. Publicly, Cox continues to say all the right things as a committed prospect but he’s set to make two huge visits in the coming weekend. This week its Auburn, next week its Ole Miss. If either of those programs plan on making a big move, now is the time.

Would Auburn take both Cox and 4* DL Charles Moore if they wanted on board? No idea outside of Moore 100% has a spot. VERY interested to see what news comes out on this young man after his visit this weekend.

3* OT Ira Henry | 6’5” | 320 lbs | St. Louis, MO

I’ve been waiting for some new OT names to pop up and yesterday one finally did. Henry has become one of the most sought after prospects on the trail late this cycle with Florida, Florida State and now Auburn hard after his signature. Henry took an official visit to the Gators this past weekend but its the Noles to keep an eye on. They have plenty of playing time to sell and Henry has considered FSU is “dream offer”.

Henry’s senior tape is not available but what you see on his junior film is a guy that can move despite his size and someone with A LOT of power in his punch. At times he can be a little overly reliant on the fact he’s just bigger and stronger than his opponent but I love how light on his feet he is at 320 lbs and his ability to finish. The Tigers need help at the OT spot for 2020 and beyond. Henry would sure help in that regard.

3* LB Christopher Russell | 6’1” | 228 lbs | Dyersburg, TN

Once a Memphis commit, Russell has become one of the top targets for a number of SEC programs. He’s already officially visited Texas A&M, will be on the Plains this weekend and has visits still scheduled for Arkansas and Tennessee later this month. The Hogs were thought to be the leaders in this race at one point but now it’s the Vols who have picked up the intensity after losing JUCO LB commit Lakia Henry.

Russell is a thumper and a clear MLB at the next level. While he doesn’t necessarily face the strongest of competition, he dominates like he should at that level. I have some questions about his speed but there’s no denying that inside the box he’s a force to be reckoned with. Auburn has made him a clear priority in recent weeks and will attempt to make a major move in his recruitment this weekend.

2* ATH Kameron Brown | 6’0” | 222 lbs | Buford, GA

I will be stunned if Brown is not on Auburn’s commit list by Monday morning. The younger brother of super star defensive tackle Derrick Brown, Kameron has spent most of his recruitment trying to convince schools to take a chance on him despite his size and slow 40 time. He finished second in the state of Georgia in tackles in 2018 with 205 and does carry two offers from strong FCS programs UT Chattanooga and Furman. But no FBS schools had come calling just yet.

Until now....

The Tigers offered Brown on January 8th just a few days before his older brother announced that he was returning to school. Interestingly, Auburn is reportedly recruiting him as an athlete. While he might get a shot at linebacker, his future might actually be at the 3-back (H-Back) position. If that’s the case, the future of that position continues to be confusing considering all the different type of athletes the Tigers have signed in recent seasons. That aside, Auburn would be getting a talented young man with a serious chip on his shoulder ready to prove his worth if he were to commit this weekend. Everyone that has spent time with the young man only have really positive things to say about his effort, attitude and leadership.

Curious Case of Dylan Jordan

One target that will not be on campus this weekend is 3* LB Dylan Jordan out of Pittsburg, KS. He recently became a top target for the Tigers and as late as Wednesday evening was expected to visit the Plains this weekend. But yesterday he surprised everyone by announcing he will instead take an official visit to TCU.

So it’s official, this weekend I’ll be taking an OV in Fort Worth pic.twitter.com/Ygp631MMu2

— DJ3️⃣ (@thedylanjordan_) January 17, 2019

Now the Horned Frogs were the originally scheduled destination before Auburn began their push but Jordan told numerous Auburn reporters he was going to the Plains instead. But the TCU staff visited him on Wednesday and apparently convinced him to go back to his original plans. Jordan has stated he wants to commit on January 28th in the past so the Tigers will need to scramble to get him on campus if they want to make a serious move in his recruitment. As of today, TCU and Utah appear to be the top schools to watch. But don’t expect Travis Williams to go down without a fight in this battle.

Interesting Early 2020 Note

Watching offers roll in over the past week for future classes, something interesting caught my eye. Auburn had offered two OTs from the state of Arizona. After some digging I found something interesting.

Interesting note on 2020 recruiting Auburn has already offered 5 players from Arizona in next year's class Auburn offered a total of 4 players in the 2013-2019 classes combined from Arizona Why the change? Dillingham grew up/coached in Arizona

— AUNerd (@AUSportsNerd) January 18, 2019

For those unfortunate folks who have Twitter blocked at their workplace, Auburn has offered 5 players in the 2020 class from the state of Arizona. They offered a total of 4 from 2013-2019 per 247’s “Offers” feature. The link? Auburn’s new offensive coordinator and QB coach Kenny Dillingham.

Auburn’s newest staff addition grew up in the state of Arizona, coached high school football there AND landed his first collegiate gig as a grad assistant for Mike Norvell at Arizona State. Pretty clear he has some connections in the area. In the 2019 class, we’ve seen the clear effect Marcus Woodson’s addition to the staff has had on the trail. All of a sudden Mississippi is a place Auburn can recruit again. Might Dillingham open up some options further west?

Maybe.... Arizona is a bit of a different beast than Mississippi but it’s still something interesting to monitor as we head into a new recruiting cycle. Whether anything materializes in these recruitments is still to be seen and I sure as heck ain’t expecting Auburn to open up a pipeline to the Copper State but I also wouldn’t be shocked if there’s someone a little further west is listed on Auburn’s signee list in 2020.

Tim Horton Impact

Earlier this week, DesertWeagle made the accurate observation in the comment section that we really haven’t talked much about the Tim Horton news on this site. Honestly, I haven’t had much of an opinion on it because I want to see how it plays out. Is he going to take Patrick Suddes old role and become the big picture/right hand man guy for Gus? Or is this Scott Fountain 2.0 and he pops up somewhere else as an on field coach. Neither move would surprise me and until Gus brings in a new RB coach it’s hard to really speculate on the impact moving forward.

However, I will say that Horton doesn’t get as much respect as he should as a recruiter. It’s not as simple as position coach gets all the guys for his position. Often times, it’s the area recruiter that lays the groundwork for top targets. Horton is a very big reason why Auburn has found success in the Tampa and Birmingham areas under Gus Malzahn. His biggest pull was obviously Kerryon Johnson but he played an important role for guys like Austin Troxell and Nate-Craig Myers as well. His biggest impact in the 2019 class was his work on recently tabbed 4* RB DJ Williams who might end up making Horton look REALLY good in a few years.

But I also understand the move. Horton is a solid, not elite recruiter and the RB coach spot is a place where you can find one of those. You see what someone like Dell McGee is doing at Georgia and it’s hard not to feel like the Tigers could get more from that position on the staff. It will be VERY interesting to see who Gus brings in to replace Horton. He will inherit a talented RB room and replace some big shoes when it at least comes to pedigree in producing elite backs in this league.

War Eagle!

from College and Magnolia - All Posts https://www.collegeandmagnolia.com/2019/1/18/18187784/2019-auburn-football-recruiting-another-busy-weekend-ahead-john-rhys-plumlee-kameron-brown

[unlikelydreamlandcreation-blog]

Santa Monica California Cheap car insurance quotes zip 90405

"Santa Monica California Cheap car insurance quotes zip 90405

Santa Monica California Cheap car insurance quotes zip 90405

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Santa Monica California Cheap car insurance quotes zip 90405

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Santa Monica California Cheap car insurance quotes zip 90405

Santa Monica California Cheap car insurance quotes zip 90405

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How much do u pay for your car insurance and how old r u?

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Santa Monica California Cheap car insurance quotes zip 90405

Santa Monica California Cheap car insurance quotes zip 90405

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So today I had a terrible storm at my house and a tree (about 1/3 of a huge tree) got ripped off from its trunk and landed on my car. I rent from a landlord and she has homeowner's insurance that may/may not pay for the removal of the tree from the yard and my car. My question is, shouldn't her insurance cover the damage to my property (my car)? Her property damaged my property so in my mind her HO insurance should pay for any damage to my car but she said she thought I would have to file a claim on my auto insurance.""

""When getting car insurance in Georgia, should I lie about dui's or be honest?""

I have 2 dui's from Georgia within 10 years. I just reinstated my license and need liablity coverage. Should I lie about my driving record just to get insurance, or be upfront right away? Do insurance companies check your driving record right away?""

Auto Insurance Traffic Violation Question?

Ok, I am trying to get some new auto insurance quotes from other companies. My problem is I have a few moving violations. One speeding ticket and one ticket for running a stop sign. They ask me if my violations have happened in the last 35 months. They said I can be 30 days off of the violation date, if I can't remember the exact date. I can't remember the date or even close. I know I can call the DMV and get a copy of my driving record for around $10. I am just wondering if there is an easier way of getting this information. Possibly through the internet. Thanks""

Cheapest auto insurance for a teen?

im 18, got a used car, and now need insurance to drive it. my family has AAA auto and if im added to that ill be paying 2k a year. i also work at target and might get a discount on metlife or travelers but i cant get quotes online and also think it wount beat the adding on plan. is there any good autoinsurance or should i just be added on parents?""

How much would I have to pay for car insurance?

I'm an 18-year-old male. I have been driving for almost two years, including permit time. I should have no tickets on my record (I had one but I was able to get it off with a kind of probation). I'm in college as a B average student. My dad has been with Allstate for awhile now, has had only 1 or 2 tickets in the past five years or so. The car I want to get insured is a '97 Acura 3.5RL with a Nav System and high security system. Any help is appreciated, but answers with numbers will be greatly appreciated. I know there's a lot of factors with car insurance, but if anyone can, I'd like to get an rough estimate.""

I need cheapest auto insurance?

I am 17 years old, and i need an auto insurance that costs around $100-150 per month. i cannot afford higher than that.""

How much is insurance on 2003 lexus IS300?

wondering how much i might be paying a month if im getting a more expensive car..?

Motorcycle insurance question?

Hey, so im 19 and live in ontario. I want to get insurance for my bike but its hella expensive. Could i 'sell' the bike to my uncle (DOES NOT LIVE WITH ME), he insures it and becomes primary rider and puts me as secondary? He has his own bike so he will have 2 bikes under his name, and ill be secondary for 1 will it work?""

How much would these cars cost to run per month?

renault clio 1.2... citron Saxo.... corsa (old) including tax , m.o.t and insurance and watever you have to pay for :) x""

Why do NEW drivers complain about how much it costs to insure there cars.?

Numbers DO NOT tell lies! my Sister works at a car insurance brokers and she told me The number of new drivers who are involved in accidents is UNREAL You CANT actually drive a car correctly when you have just passed your test (I know you think you can but you cant) So therefore you are a liability to other road users and therefore have to pay more to insure your car.

Is it a legal requirement to have caravan insurance?

Is it a legal requirement to have caravan insurance like it is car insurance? Thanks for your help!

What is the cheapest insurance for a Full-Coverage 2009 Hyundai Sonata?

i just need a cheap insurance for a 2009 Hyundai Sonata.. moving out to my boyfriends house and looking for something thats going to save me some money please anything will help :) Thanks

Is Physician's Mutual a good insurance to buy on your own?

My family currently has no medical insurance and I received information in the mail on Physicians Mutual Insurance Company and wanted to know if anyone has used them and if they are affordable for a family?

Why do we NEED car insurance?!?

Why is it the LAW that we have car insurance?? I honestly think it's stupid. Shouldn't we, as free Americans, be able to make the choice of whether or not we want insurance, and still legally drive a vehicle, as long as we have a license, at our own risk? Kind of like if you go skiing or snowboarding, you go at your own risk, you're not forced to get skiing insurance , or boarding insurance , or anything like that. I mean, think of this situation: I have no insurance, and I wreck into somebody. They have insurance, so they are covered. I don't, so I will either have to get rid of my car, or pay for repairs myself; that's the risk I took and this is how I'm paying for it, by being car less or spending tons of money on repairs. But why must we be forced by law to have it, or NO DRIVING FOR YOU says big ole' government?? This is angering me because I'm currently in college, without a car, and while I can walk to my work and school, it's still about 30-45 minutes each way to walk, and if I could get an old car for cheap, it would make my life MUCH easier and less of a hassle.""

""What is a reasonable auto insurance liability amount, i don't believe the current legal limits are enough?

Florida State Required auto insurance limits are not nearly enough insurance to carry especially if you live in a larger city in florida. What is a good acceptable liability limit to carry on my vehicles?

How would an insurance company know how much a car has been lowered by?

So I won't get insured if my car has been lowered by more than 50mm. But if I told them it was lowered by 50mm, if I was to lower it any more than that, how would they know?""

I need help!!!! where can i find health coverage?

Every day I suffer from pain. I have a wife and kids to support and an autistic son, so my wife cannot work, that way she can give him the care he needs. Medi-cal sent me a rejection. I can't get insurance because they all say they won't cover me for a pre-existing condition. I tried applying for the states pre existing healthcare program, they said I couldn't get coverage because my birth certificate has a different name than I have now. Hey......I have no control over the decisions mom made. I need help.!!! I struggle every single day and minute with this pain. I have a doctor that I pay cash to see, every time I go he gives me heck about writing a pain med. Script. Talks down to me really. He only gives a little bit, and its hard to find a cash doctor at all who would even offer these at all because of the people who abuse it. I'm at wits end, I'm ou of options if anybody knows of a program in California or anything federal that can help a white male, in the 30's, self employed, with a debilitating condition, make too much to be a bum, not enough to afford paying my own way through medical procedures, PLEASE HELP ME!!!!""

My daughter and car insurance?

my daughter just got a car for my granddaughter is it illegal not to have my grand daughter listed on the insurance policy..she does'nt want them to know she is a new driver...we live in new jersey

How much will an average full coverage insurance for a BMW motorcycle cost. Type k1200r.?

I have no traffic violation and perfect credit record. I am 56 years old.

Cheapest car insurance female driver full no claims?

low milage

Insurance quote for my car?

I looked all over the place and insurance is very expensive or me. I am 17 years old. The car is a 1998 Mitsubishi eclipse gs 2 door. The car is under my moms name. I am currently under state farm and I qualify or the good student discount and safe driver discount on another car. I am currently paying 400 dollars for that car.

Santa Monica California Cheap car insurance quotes zip 90405

Santa Monica California Cheap car insurance quotes zip 90405

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/michigan-insurance-options-nicholas-kim/"

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Average Teen Car Insurance Prices?

"Average Teen Car Insurance Prices?

I'm a 16 year old female who is currently just looking around to see how much I can expect to possibly pay when I get my own car. Please don't give me answers like Add yourself to your parents insurance Or Have your parents call their agent""... My parents DON'T drive and I'm NOT burdening anyone else in my family to put me on their insurance plan. I want to be independent and see if I can do it on my own.. So back to the question. On average""""

BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://howmuchisinsurance.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 

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Im looking into a 1978 cadillac coupe deville as a first car, and im wondering if it goes cheap in car insurance. Cuz it could be cheaper up to a point till its like too old and its just becomes more expensive. And im wondering about all older cars in general. N yes i know what i might get into it is a older car might break down on me more often than usual, ill just deal with it.""

""Crashed fathers car, i have open insurance, car is still insureed in guys name bought car from?""

hi bought car, put it in my fathers name, before got chance to insure it, some lady totally at fault(for the accident) crashed into me. father has no insurance on car but he is the registered owner. the guy i bought the car off never cancelled his insurance on the car but was not the registered owner when i crashed. i have another policy on another car that says i have open insurance so long as the car is insured. well the car is insured but is the insurance void since seller is no longer the registered owner of the car. am i insured. thx for your time""

What options are availible to me for life insurance for my father who has pre existing conditions?

My dad over the past several years has seen his health go down hill, and until recenly, i have not been able to afford a life insurance policy for him. He has had strokes and heart attacks, so there are some pre existing conditions. Are there any life insurance policies that are affordable, that would cover him? Im just looking for something that would cover funeral cost.""

What does insurance go by?

someone said insurance is determined by the weight of the vechicle. Can't it be by the age of the vechicle? Or the driver?

I just got notice my insurance premiums jumped so I high I cannot pay them.?

I just got notice at work this morning that my insurance is going from 79.00 every two weeks to 179.00 and with my family which I have on my insurance went from 345.00 to 750.00 every weeks. I cannot afford this! I have no idea what to do. I only make 1700.00 a month. What can I do?

Health Insurance for diabetics?

If i were to get health insurance and then marry my girlfrind (who at the moment is pregnant) do you think that she would be able to get on my insurance even though she has a pre-existing condition of type 1 diabetes? She can not get her own insurance because of it, only if her work provides and her work does not and the job market is still rocky. So what would we have to do to get her insured?""

""I was misled by auto insurance company, what are my rights here?""

OK i signed out with all-state insurance company. The quote was $380, the agent faxed me only papers to sign since i was happy about the quote. I asked her 2 fax me the Insurance Id card but she did not(i waited a week). After tired of waiting and being turned down by DMV 2 renew my car registration i called the office and asked someone else 2 handle my case. Things went fine without her help , the new guy sent me the Id card immediately. On Friday i received all the papers & the ID cards but i was suprised when i saw $415 ...i called but didn't speak with her, the guy that helped me B4 was like but you signed the papers, i asked him 2 send me the papers i signed again..and guess what? The psycho lady played me cause, she only faxed me papers 2 sign but not the papers that showed $415, all i agreed was based on the quote she gave me which is $380. She never sent me the $415 papers. What can i do with this cause they are not prepared 2 refund me or fix their numbers""

Car Insurance question! please help confused. SR-22?

So I just purchased a new car, its in my name only. I live with my girlfriend who has to have SR-22 insurance and she does. She will drive this car periodically. Do i need to list her as a driver of this car? It really raises my rates! If she is paying for her own SR-22 insurance, and its unnamed so it covers her in any vehicle she drives do I need to list her??? Need some experienced information please! Thanks!""

With no health insurance . . .?

How come I have to pay full price with cash, but if someone has medicaid or some other type of health insurance, the insurance company only pays (for example) $52.00 of an office call that I have to pay $80.00. Isn't that discrimination to people that pay cash?""

Where can i go with my insurance? ?

Hurt my knee. I have myers Steven toohey insurance. Do I just go to any hospital? Who accepts this insurance?

""I am 18 and can't find car insurance under 2000, does anyone know anywhere?

its insurance for a toyota yaris 2003 Y reg 3 door hatch back for an 18 year old boy with a 1 month old full uk lisence.

Changing grades for car insurance?

so my car insurance company wants my transcript so that i can get a discount. my GPA is high enough for the discount, but not high enough for my dad. if i make a copy and slightly adjust it and give it to my dad, there shouldn't be a big problem right. its not like they check the grades with the school to see if its perfect. and i'm not changing an F to a b. just like raise my low 70's to 74's or 75's. theres a possibility of this working correct?""

I have no insurance and need an abortion?

Please dont judge im young and recently found out im pregnant. But im not ready for a baby... I would love to keep my child but if my parents ever found out they'd literally disown me. I have no insurance and I dont know how much an abortion would cost. I was thinking about getting the abortion pill still not sure. How much would that cost?I checked online but it didnt say anything about abortion.

Getting Health Insurance?

I recently moved to New York City and the health insurance is expensive here. I was living in Virginia with my family and they still live there. Can I apply for Virginia health insurance, even though I'm living in NYC?""

How to get health insurance for my daughter?

I'm 22. I have health insurance coverage under my parents (it's just better insurance than I could get on my own, that's why I've kept it). However, I am pregnant and need to find insurance for my daughter for when she's born. Under my current insurance, I am covered but she is not. My question is, what should I do? I got an application for Medicaid but will it cover her before she is born, even though I don't need insurance? Any advice?""

Any one know about car insurance for teenage driver in north carolina?

so im going to be driving soon and i will need to get insured. does anyone know how much this will cost if i live in north carolina? by the way, i dont know what car im getting...im looking. ;] so it would be helpful if you could give me a range for different types of cars. oh yeah, and sources would be nice. =] thanks a bunch!""

Cost of malpractice insurance for neurosurgeon?

I'm planning on specializing in neurosurgery however I persistently receive word of the exorbitant malpractice insurance rates majorly eating into the salary. Do any of you have a clue of the average rate neurosurgeons are charged? I don't want a specific quote, just the average.""

Is it standard procedure for home insurance agents to visit your house before they insure it?

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Having difficulty cancelling auto insurance with allstate?

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Insurance on a used car verses a new car?

My dad says that if I buy a new car my insurance will double or even more than my insurance on my used car. Is that true?

""I want to buy this car, but have no licence or insurance?""

I found this AMAZING deal on a car, It's a 2000 Dodge Neon, 136k miles, with no crash history, exterior or interior damage and apparently no issues with it (a/c works, heat, radio, etc). She wants $800 for a quick sale to get baby supplies. I want to grab it before it sells because it's affordable and doesn't look too bad off, but I don't have a licence or insurance... I was going to buy it and let it sit in the drive way until I went and got my licence/insurance and stuff, so how do I go about doing this? Is it legal to even buy a car without either? Should I have a friend with a licence drive it to my house? Etc?""

Auto insurance and baby seat replacement?

I was in an accident a few months ago and I heard recently that the insurance company of the person at fault has to pay for new baby seats since the seats have served their purpose by protecting the children. Anyone else have experience with this? Can I get the insurance compant to pay for new seats?

How much does it cost for car insurance for an 18 year old male at insautoinsurance?

How much does it cost for car insurance for an 18 year old male at insautoinsurance?

Nissan skyline insurance and price?

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I would like to buy an insurance for my camera. Please write only the link for not professional. Thank you so much! USA

Individual health insurance?

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Wats the cheapest insurance in oklahoma?

Wats the cheapest insurance in oklahoma?

Do I need to be insured to test drive cars I want to purchase?

I am looking to buy a new car, so far I have test drove 3 cars this week and my colleague at work has just notified me that I am probably breaking the law. I am buying a car either through auto trader or ebay (Fiat Stilo incase anyone is selling) so most the sellers are private, I currently drive a VW Polo fully comp, does that insurance not cover me to drive someone else's car even if they are in it ? What about their insurance, does that not cover me ? And if I'm not insured, what would I have to do to make sure I am not breaking the law ? A temporary insurance costs me nearly 100 as I am quite young, its an absurd amount to pay just to test the car (about 10%) and its completely ill advised to buy a car without first test driving it ? Regards Omar*""

Do I need to have insurance before registrating a car in California?

Do I need to have insurance before registrating a car in California?

Car Insurance question?

about how much does it cost for a 16 year old to be added to parents car insurance? allstate

Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance?

Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance?

Cheap Car Insurance in Fl?

I'm a 17 year old girl and I have a 95 Pontiac Firebird . What are some super cheap car insurances in Florida . I just need the basic coverage , like just the state minimum . Can somebody please tell me some cheap insurance companies !""

Auto insurance is expensive for my teenager son. Are there any options for me to keep expenses down?

I'm makeing payments on truck for him, now that he can drive, do I have to add him to my insurance? And how much more will it be? I hear some parents don't tell there insurance, they just say there child is borrowing the car. But my son does not live in the same house hold , but is in another city over. Can I still just say he is borrowing the truck. If he gets in a car accident I understand it's on me, but will my insurancecand the law see it in that manner.""

In what way has the affordable health care act made health care more affordable? My insurance just went up 34%?

And don't tell me that a 34% increase in one year is normal !!!

Ca dmv insurance online?

heres the deal. i want to renew my tags online but it says my insurance needs to be on dmv file to be able to do that. so is there a online system i can file my insurance on or do i still have to go to dmv to do that

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I just want to drive my moms car for a bit until I buy my own!

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Is it legal to use foreign car insurance in the UK?

I'm a 17 year old male and I've just passed my driving test, I'm trying to think of every and any way possible to get car insurance as cheap as possible. I was wondering whether it's possible to purchase and use car insurance from a foreign company in the UK and if it is possible whether you could have a policy on an English car or whether i'd have to purchase an import. Thanks in advance.""

MY FRIEND CAR INSURANCE?

I WANT TO KNOW WHY STATE FARM CANCEL PEOPLE INSURANCE MY FRIEND HAS HAD 2 WRECK AND THEY PAY INSURANCE TWICE A YEAR THEY SAY AFTER YOU HAD MORE THEN ONE WRECK NO MATTER HOW LONG YOU BEEN WITH THEM THEY CANCEL AND ALSO ALLSTATE HAS A FORGIVENESS THEY NEVER CANCEL YOU

What should I do about this car insurance?

I have a car that is worth no more than $1500. I bought it off someone in my family and I should transfer ownership (as it is from a different state). At the moment they have selected me as a secondary drive for insurance, as I am a P plater it will cost a lot of money to put it under me. To reregister it and insure it under me would cost a lot. (including getting another roadworthy certificate). I took it in for a check and they said repairs would cost nearly $2,000 which is more than the car. Plus the insurance, totaling about $3500 in total when the car is only worth $1500 max. So this is the situation I need help with, the car runs great and I may have just gotten ripped off by the mechanics (I didn't bring it in, someone else did and they can seem like an easy person to rip off) - also we have a friend who is a retired mechanic and he said the car is in great shape and roadworthy should be no problem, so that conflicts with what these guys said.. Any tips? I have no clue what to do. What do you do when it costs more to put a car on the road than the car is worth?""

""Someone hit my car, do I have to report to my insurance company risking the rate increase?""

Few months ago somebody hit my rental car in their rental car during vacation. Other party's fault, he admitted, police report confirms this is his fault. Both me and the other party were insured. The other party seems to be reasonable. Now I have a repair bill, few thousands. I am reluctant to report this to my insurance company, since I heard over and over again that even though it's not my fault my rate can and probably will still go up (read here if you don't believe http://www.carinsurancecomparison.com/does-your-auto-insurance-go-up-if-someone-hits-your-car). I think this is ridiculous, but that's the way how things are. So is it possible, and is it a good idea that I contact the other party insurance myself without involving my insurance since my case is a clear cut case? Are there any pitfalls that I should be aware of?""

I am looking for my auto insurance statement so I can see if my husband paid our insurance?

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How much does motorcycle insurance typically cost in Ontario?

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Teen car insurance!!!?

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Dodge durango insurance vs kia kia borrego?

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Car insurance and accident investigations?

My Gf was driving on the freeway going home from school. While driving about 10 car lengths ahead she saw that car were swerving out of the way. There was a stalled car in the number 2 lane. She had enough time to slow down and change to the number 1 lane without any incident when she was suddenly rear ended on her back right bumper. That force sent her into the ceneter median aand hit her front driver side hard enough that it spun her around and faced the opposite direction (facing traffic). Long story short she has severe front and back end damage on a Brand New 2008 Civic that she is leasing. After speaking with the appraiser of the he mentioned that it is likely a totaled loss. Ahe has full coverage insurance with AAA but don't think that she has GAp insurance. How is this going to affect her lease that she just entered a month ago. She was not at fault and the accident report hasn't been finalized. Will this affcet her in getting a new car and insurance?

Car insurance? first car?

i have a '96 fiesta 1.1.its my first car. i cannot get insurance cheaper than 2000. it is garaged, minimal miles per year. any one know where i can get cheap insurance??""

Average Teen Car Insurance Prices?

I'm a 16 year old female who is currently just looking around to see how much I can expect to possibly pay when I get my own car. Please don't give me answers like Add yourself to your parents insurance Or Have your parents call their agent""... My parents DON'T drive and I'm NOT burdening anyone else in my family to put me on their insurance plan. I want to be independent and see if I can do it on my own.. So back to the question. On average""""

WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF I DRIVE WITHOUT CAR INSURANCE AS WELL AS NO FULL UK LICENCE?

HELLO, ONE OF MY FRIEND WANT TO KNOW, WHAT WOULD HAPPEN, IF HE DRIVE WITHOUT CAR INSURANCE, AS WELL AS WITHOUT FULL UK LICENCE. HE HAS GOT PROVISIOAL LICENCE, JUST ASKING. HE NEVER DRIVE ANY CAR WITHOUT FULL LICENCE AS WELL AS FULL INSURANCE. JUST HE WANTS KNOW. WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF POLICE CATCH HIM ON THE ROAD, I HEARD THAT POLICE WILL TAKE HIS CAR,SCRAP THE CAR, WHAT ELSE, WILL HE FINE OR PRISON? HE JUST WANT TO KNOW.""

What kind of Certificate of Insurance do I need.?

Hi. I just found a new apartment and in the lease contract there is something about a Section 1940.5 of the California Civil Code. The code basically says that if I have a waterbed or fish tank that is over 5 gallons I need to provide the landlord with a certificate of Insurance in the amount of $100,000. What kind of insurance would I be looking for to cover this? I have a 18 gallon fish tank that I would like to keep. Thank you!""

Who insures the insurance companies?

Just out of curiosity who insures the insurance companies? Do they insure themselves? If so, due to all the bureaucratic BS do they have to pay a deductible to themselves? Or are they insured by other companies? Is it just one big circle? For example: Company X's building gets destroyed by a tornado, do they pay for everything or are they insured by Company Y.""

""Since we pay for car insurance in case sh-t happens, shouldn't we get that money back if sh-t doesn't happen?""

Car insurance is the biggest rip-off ever. I hate paying it. Sooo in case stuff happens, insurance takes care of it but then your rates go up!?! WTF? So if nothing goes wrong for a full year, shouldn't we get our money back?""

What is the average of a full coverage insurance for a new 2014 sedan in NJ ?

What is the average of a full coverage insurance for a new 2014 sedan in NJ ?

""What is the best rate (cheapest) for basic liability car insurance in ontario , primmum insurance told me?""

thier rates is 135.00 / month and i have perfect driving record ,can any one help me plz""

Motorcycle Insurance cost??

Hey guys! My husband wants to get a kawasaki vulcan 900 for his first bike but when he called our insurance provider for our cars they weren't there but I was just wondering if anyone could give us a ballpark of how much it might cost every 6months or year. He would be the only driver and he is 25 with no marks on his record. We also live in the south if that changes anything.

What is the best and most affordable home owner's insurance in Texas?

What is the best and most affordable home owner's insurance in Texas?

Car insurance - why isnt it cheaper?

My partner and I have just sold our car. It was a Vauxhall Astra TDi 1.9 Diesel 56plate. We are looking for a little run around car thats cheaper to run. I found a Daewoo Matiz SE 796cc X reg petrol. Apparently its group 2 insurance but its just as expensive as our old car. Would this be right if none of our details have changed???

What is the cheapest car insurance company ?

The only way i can get a inexpensive sports car is to find my dad a better insurance company.

What legally and financially happens if your car is totaled? How much would insurance go up?

Would it be better fiscally to not tell the insurance company? What are they suppose to do if your car is totaled? I have Geico.

How long are car insurance companys supposed to provide a rental car for?

i have a 2004 chevy caviler that is completely paid for and some guy ran into the back of my car yesterday. It's completely crushed in. i have liability and he has full coverage progressive. I contacted his insurance company and they want me to pay 18 dollars a day to rent some stupid little kia shouldn't he have to pay for it till my car gets out the shop or claimed totaled and i get some money to replace my car. help me out as much as you can 10 points to the best and most detailed answer

What if I don't pay car insurance?

Hi, I am wondering what happens if I don't pay my car insurance. This are the facts: I bought a car from a dealership, they offered me a car insurance, I did not want it because the car was to be shipped to Europe and sold there as brand new. Therefore I did not want to pay insurance for car that is not even my own. Nevertheless I had to register the car in CA as all the cars have to be. Now I got a letter from DMV in CA saying that if I don't pay car insurance the registration will be canceled. Now the car is already in Europe and has been sold lately. Will there be any consequences for me? Will I have to pay any additional money to DMV? What happens after the registration is canceled? Thank you for your help""

How much is car insurance per month for a 16 year old?

I really want to get a Pontiac G6 on my 16th Birthday, I`m just curious as to how much the car insurance would be on it !""

Does car insurance rate depend on a car's make and model?

I'm trying to decide whether to buy a 1999 toyota camry or a 2003 honda accord and i'd like to know if it makes a difference on the rate depending on year. I also recently got into a car accident that was my fault which i know will obviously increase my rate.

Can I drive with my moms insurance?

Can I drive my moms car with her insurance with her in the car with me. Without being added onto her insurance policy?

What company offer auto insurance for illegal ?

Do you know what company offer auto insurance for illegal ? I email for some company but they answer me that I need a valid license.

I am 17 and ive just passed my CBT.i am hoping too buy either 100cc or 125 cc. how much would m insurance be?

I am 17 and ive just passed my CBT.i am hoping too buy either 100cc or 125 cc. how much would m insurance be?

My Insurance Company Want Me To Buy My Car Back!?

I had Learners insurance out with Collingwood Learners. I had a crash and have excepted responsability. They have now inspected my car and decided it is beyond economical repair, but a garage I know can fix it for me! My Insurance company have asked that I send in my Vehicle Registration Document as well as the most recent MOT Test Certificate and also the Service History Book! They have told me they will value my car and then pay me the price they believe it to be worth, They will take the 350.00 excess from this also and then I can choose to buy my car back from them at whatever they value it to be! Is there a way around this where I wont lose my car for example refusing a payment from them or something? Please help me I'm new to this all! Thanks""

Auto insurance for a teenager in a mustang?

I'm a female, 16, turning 17 in June. I have over a 3.6 GPA. I was rear ended about a month ago (not my fault) and I found a few mustangs (2003-2007). Anyway, I was wondering about how much insurance would be. Serious answers please?""

""No insurance company will quote me, dckheads..?""

They won't even give me a quote... Ive tried all cars even 1.1L fiestas/corsa/clios and 700cc Smarts... wtf is wrong with insurers in UK. im 17, just got licence.""

Getting insurance under my name?

I currently live in NJ. I'm planning on switching insurance companies and i would like to put it under my name. I'm currently under my dad's policy and he is the owner of the car. But, for me to get my own insurance, i need to transfer to title under my name. But, it says that you need proof of insurance before you can transfer the title. Is my dad's insurance (which is the current insurance for the car) good enough for proof?""

How long can you take leave for NJ short term disability?

I've been at my current job since December so I am ineligible for FMLA. However, I understand that short term disability for pregnancy gives you 4 weeks prior to your anticipated due date and then 6 weeks after. Is this correct? Can this amount of time change if your company uses a private insurance plan vs submitting directly through the state.""

Does health insurance cover self-inflicted wounds?

Do health insurance companies cover the hospital fees for self-inflicted wounds like cuts or burns?

What is a good life insurance company?

I have been looking into Garden State and Globe. Do any of you use them? Who do you use as your life insurance holder? I am going to look around Monday with local companies but I have been looking around online. It will be for myself, my husband, and your 1 year old daughter(only a small one in case something happened and it would be for burial).""

Average Teen Car Insurance Prices?

I'm a 16 year old female who is currently just looking around to see how much I can expect to possibly pay when I get my own car. Please don't give me answers like Add yourself to your parents insurance Or Have your parents call their agent""... My parents DON'T drive and I'm NOT burdening anyone else in my family to put me on their insurance plan. I want to be independent and see if I can do it on my own.. So back to the question. On average""""

Who are the top insurance providers in the US for life insurance?

I am wanting to get life insurance for myself and want to find out some good references or list of common providers in US. Also, I need guidance of selecting the type of life insurance (what type of policy do most people normally get). Thanks""

Do i have to remove a car i sold from my insurance?

i had 2 cars an old car and a new car, they were both insured under one policy with me and my son as the only drivers. now i sold the old car, and when i get a quote for removing my old car from my insurance policy it says that the insurance will increase about $70 every 6 months and that's because i loose the multiple car discount and also because i had my young son as driver only on the old car and removing it will force me to put him as a driver on the new car. i sold the car and i have a paper from the person that i sold it to indicating that they bought it. my question now is, would there be any risks by keeping the car on the policy, is it illegal? or if anything happens to the car, will they go after my insurance although i sold the car? *i already sent the release of liability to the DMV *i live in California any help would be appreciated 10 pts for best answer""

Should I trust car insurance comparison sites?

Should I trust car insurance comparison sites?

""How much, on average, is contents insurance?""

I'm attending university soon and I will be flatting. I want to get contents insurance for my belongings. I will be taking $10,000 worth of things with me (Clothing, Shoes, Accessories, Laptop, iPod, Bedding, Books, small shelves, clothing rack etc) What is the average cost for insurance per week? Any answer will help. I'm working out my budget! Thanks in advance.""

Need car insurance but dont have title?

ok.. i have have a car, its mine but its not in my name and it will be very very hard to get it in my name(i dont feel like explaining). i need insurance very bad or ima have to pay a huge fine. is there a way i can get insurance without the title? please help""

How much will my insurance go up?

I got a ticket today for reckless driving (drifted coming out of school.) I'm only 16 and I'm a male, so how much will my insurance go up?""

Car Insurance quotes - when you get an online quote and it asks you?

how much your car is worth, do you quote the price you paid for it or its present price..? I ask because if you think about it you could have bought your car last year for 12, 000, and one year later it's worth 9,000. If you car is written off it isn't as ther inusrance company will pay out on the amount you paid for the car.. this happened to my brother and they only paid the value it was worth on the day of his crash which was considerably less....""

What are some affordable health insurance plans?

I am 20 years old and do not have health insurance and I need to get my wisdom teeth pulled! So i'm looking for an affordable health insurance.I've already applied for Medicaid and was denied.I need help please!

UK Cheap Insurance Cars for 17 year old...?

Hello, I am 17 and i have just started to take driving lessons and will soon hope to pass my test here in the UK and then get a car for use to and from college (and if i can gen an apprentice job then to work as well as college one day a week) and some driving for social use (but very very little) and looking for some recommendations for good car for cheap insurance that would not look out of place at college here in the UK. Thanks""

Is it illegal to drive without car insurance?

My Sister has car insurance and she told me to take her to her destination, but i don't have car insurance under my name and im afraid that if i get pulled over for some odd reason and ill get busted for not having insurance.""

How much would insurance for a motorcycle cost for a 17 year old?

How much approximately for a 17 yr old with a 250 ninja? what about a 600cc bike? I do not have my drivers license yet, only my permit and I would get a learners permit on my bike. How much do you think it will cost?""

Need Health Insurance Advice: Colorado?

Question I had a shoulder injury while weight lifting last November. I recently graduated and my school's health insurance is going to end soon, and I need health insurance to help pay for a possible MRI/surgery down the road. Or even more PT. I don't have much experience with health insurance because I never get sick or had injuries before so I need advice on what to look for in the policy. Do health insurance generally allow pre-existing shoulder injuries to be covered?""

Is it necessary to hold on to old auto insurance bills?

I switched auto insurance companies recently and I was just wondering if there is any reason at all I should keep my old auto insurance bills from the old company. I'm the one ...show more

Car insurance more expensive for men?

I'm twenty five and looking to get my first car, a small 1.3 Nissan, anyway i checked the insurance and it costs 3250 for one year, that sounds extortionate, no? I then went back and done a quote for a lady driver who just turned eighteen January just gone - it would cost 1750. Is that not sorta wrong?""

Small business insurance ? what is the average cost?

I am looking a leasing a building that is currently a bed and breakfast cottage. I will do the same thing except not offering breakfast. Wanting to make a business decision but have been waiting for 2 days to be able to obtain a cost for small business insurance. Anyone have some idea on the cost?

Age Of 16 to fill up a car insurance quote?

why car insurance agent put 16 on car insurance quote even you got your license when you were 18...?

Which auto insurance companies only go back three months for accidents and violations?

Which auto insurance companies only go back three months for accidents and violations?

""Can a 16yr. old making $800 a month, afford a car that cost $24,000....parents payinng for insurance...?""

Can a 16yr. old making $800 a month, afford a car that cost $24,000....parents payinng for insurance...?""

How much does a HSG test cost?

My gyno wants me to get an HSG test done. I have PCOS and am trying to get pregnant. I live in Georgia and have Blue Cross Blue Shield insurance. I wanted to know how much it would cost and if i truely need to have this test done to get the perscription I need to become pregnant.

Health insurance in NY state for pregnant women?

I just graduated with a bachelors degree, and my student health insurance runs out in August. The health insurance offered by my husbands job (which won't open up to me until Jan.1 anyway) considers pregnancy a pre existing condition, and won't cover it. We have been searching for affordable plans, but the only ones we have found that will cover pregnancy aren't accepted in New York state. For all the plans offered in NY that we've been able to find, none cover pregnancies in progress. I would hate to have to use the state provided health care plan for pregnant mothers (mostly because I feel like there is no reason for me to be part of a government program when we are capable of paying for our own insurance, but also because it means we have to go to specific clinics and I won't be able to keep my doctor), but there is no way we will be able to cover all the costs of a birth, especially if for some reason I need a C-Section or the like. Can anyone give me some advice, especially as it relates to the NY state health plan for pregnant women?""

Would financing your first car make your insurance go up?

would financing your first car make your insurance go up? As in, a payment plan for a used car.""

Health Insurance Problem?

I am a part time student and i have a part time job that i am trying to turn into a full time job in the near future however I am afraid that when i turn twenty-one at the end of this week i will be dropped from my parents Insurance and be left high and dry. Can i stay on my parent's insurance if i am only a part time student, and if not any suggestions for what to do would be greatly appreciated thank you.""

Will insurance cover us?

i just enrolled in insurance through my work a few days ago but coverage doesnt kick in until january. my wife went to the doctor today and i found out its gonna cost 1400$ for blood test. will they cover things from the date of enrollment or the day coverage starts?

Is anyone in need of affordable life insurance and you live in South Carolina?

Is anyone in need of affordable life insurance and you live in South Carolina?

How much for car insurance?

My mom drives a Mercedes B 150 (about 5 year old car), she's Middle Aged and had a good driving record so her insurance is around 200-300pa. I'm nearly 18, and a new driver (passed yesterday), was wondering how much insurance would be for me if I was added onto her insurance. (just an estimation would be great!) Thanks in advance!""

Average Teen Car Insurance Prices?

I'm a 16 year old female who is currently just looking around to see how much I can expect to possibly pay when I get my own car. Please don't give me answers like Add yourself to your parents insurance Or Have your parents call their agent""... My parents DON'T drive and I'm NOT burdening anyone else in my family to put me on their insurance plan. I want to be independent and see if I can do it on my own.. So back to the question. On average""""

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/fishing-tackle-insurance-quotes-morgan-scott/"

[kawaiifunhologram-blog]

Very Cheap Car Insurance?

"Very Cheap Car Insurance?

Hello, I need the cheapest insurance.I am from NY, please help.

BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://financeandcreditsolution.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 

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I have full insurance, and got in a pretty bad accident. The car is totaled... wrecked. I had full insurance... but since it is almost completely destroyed, how will the insurance handle it? I got rear ended, and the car spun out of control, going 50 miles an hour. It knocked me out... By the way, I'm lucky I'm alive! And will never drive again in my life! I am 19...""

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What would be a good FIRST CAR?

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Who gets what (or how much) from an insurance settlement?

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Best place to Compare Car Insurance Quotes Online?

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What would my insurance company do if I told them I'm derestricting my moped?

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How can I get my first ever used car if I don't have any auto insurance b4?

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What's a good medical insurance plan for someone in my situation in CA?

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Hello, I need the cheapest insurance.I am from NY, please help.

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Since he has a ton of sports cars

Does Progressive raise your insurance rates for no reason?

I got a good quote from them online, but the main complaint I have heard is that they raise people's insurance for no reason. They got good initial quotes, but a couple months later, they raise them. Anybody know anything about that?""

2 Door Cars vs 4 Door Cars cost of Insurance?

I am interested in going from my 4 Door Acura TSX to a 350z or G35 Coupe, 2 door cars. I was wondering what the difference in prices would be for me, I am 19, no accidents, no tickets, clean record. As of now my parents have me on their insurance which I am sure makes it much cheaper, so what would the average cost of switching be if I was on my parents insurance or I was to take up my own. Please let me know, Thanks! :)""

Car insurance?

I ha gotten a speeding ticket like two years ago it was the first ever since I was 18 and now I'm 27.. Paid it.. Will it show on my record when I switch companies? It still hasn't made my current insurance go up but if I switch will it show?

Insurance help!!!!???

hi i'm an 18 yo living by myself in seattle, wa, just wondering how much insurance do i have to pay, because i'm interested in a 1986 lincoln town car., i live in downtown, and i know prices are higher if you are in the city, i only want to have a car to drive it on weekends an whenever buses are not available. so if you can give me an idea gow much is it, i'll be greatful with your help. thanks bye xoxo""

Would it be better for our government to give everyone health insurance or?

Produce more health care resources by increasing funding for medical schools and work to flood the market in health care services thus making it more affordable for everyone?

Insurance Costs for a P Plate Hyundai Tiburon?

I live in Melbourne and want to get an idea on the insurance? (I already know its a lot) Thanks

What are some cars that look good and are cheap?

Well it's time i can almost actually get a car and drive... I'm a teen so obviously my first car can't be to expensive.. i'm looking for any cars that look good and hopefully people can tell me some that would look good.. i know i shouldn't care as much about looks but basically i'm trying to find a used car around 100,000 miles maybe a little more or less for under $6000... i can't get a real expensive car because of insurance i'll have to start off on basic so i'm wondering if there are any nice looking cars that are cheap... I had in mind an eclipse or something but i'm really not sure if i want something like that but thanks...""

How has the highly competitive and free market capitalism of Health Insurance Co worked for the last?

How has the highly competitive and free market capitalism of Health Insurance Co worked for the last? 70 years for Americans? I can only speak for Kanucks... the #1 most popular service the gov't provides for is Universal Health Care coverage, I think the #2 is a Timmies LgDD and a Maple Dipped..""

How much does insurance cost on a Ferrari?

I've always wondered what the cost of insurance would be for a $250k car such as a Ferrari F430. just curious

What is an acceptable car insurance cost for newly passed 19 yr old male?

What's the acceptable range? Please don't start giving me infos about quotes and stuffs, i've done them all thousands times, just asking for A PRICE you would think as FINE. (sorry to say this, but i asked similar qstns 10-12 times before, but no one answered correctly) thank you""

Where can I find a comparative listing for auto insurance rates?

Where can I find a comparative listing for auto insurance rates?

Affordable Student Health Insurance if I can't be on my parent's plan?

My parents are Japanese citizens in living in Japan and the insurance I currently am in with them obviously won't cover me in the U.S. I am going to be a college freshman and wonder if anyone knows any affordable student health insurance plans/companies. The plan provided at my school is a bit pricey and needs me to pay it all at once in the beginning which I can't do. Any affordable and numerous-payment-planned insurances?

How can I get my car insurance cheaper?

Hi am 31 and got 8 years no clams I drive a corsa vxr and am finding it hard to get it cheap

Best car insurance companies...?

I am 18 and need to acquire insurance ... what are the best deals around?' I live in California ... Thanks!

First car insurance help.?

Hi, I just bought my first car today. It was a Ford Ka 1997 1.3L. I am at college and have only 210 income per month. I don't know which would be the best type of insurance for me. I need to be insured for at the latest 24th April 09. Should I do monthly or annually. I did an annual insurance quote over the internet and the cheapest I got was with Endsleigh for 1500. What would be the best method of payment for me? Thanks very much for any help.""

Why should teenagers have to pay so much on insurance for a BRZ or FRS?

What just because it looks like a sports car it is?? Since 2007 teenagers have been disapointed that they can't get a subaru WRX or STI because of the turbo charger and now that they've made a two door without turbo it's STILL off limits for teens?? It's FOUR cyclinders. Give us a break. All you old farts drove muscle cars when you were our age.

""If i crashed my motorcycle, would my dad get penalized on his insurance?""

Quite recently I bought a motorcycle (Kawasaki 650r) and in order to save money on my motorcycle insurance, I insured my dad as the primary driver on it (had his license accident free for 40 years). Im still on the policy and everything, but if i were to crash and total my bike, god forbid, would my dad get penalized on his insurance?""

Why is Auto Insurance in Quebec cheaper? And how do I go abouts changing my insurance to Quebec?

I've been told insurance in Quebec is much cheaper. I know a few friends that live there can I change my license address to Quebec then seek insurance over there? Im getting sick of paying 400+ in Ottawa.

95 Jeep Grand Cherokee insurance Cost?

New driver, just got my licence at 18 years old.""

How does the car insurance differ between this vehicles?

I'm about to be 18 and am in the market for a used car. I currently drive an '05 Chevy Colorado and am paying maybe a little less than $80 per month. I'm looking at the BMW 3 series ('06-'08), Acura TL ('07-'08), Honda Accord Coupe ('08-'10), and the Acura TSX ('08-'09). Just wondering how much this would bump my insurance rate up and which would be the most practical as far as insurance goes. I have no wrecks or tickets on my record.""

Where can I find affordable dental insurance for my father?

He is 50+, I live in Michigan,help please?? I tried looking, but no progress. I want him to get something affordable so he can have better and healthier teeth. Thank you, Jenn""

How important is car insurance ?

My dad works for an insurance company so he thinks I need insurance but I can't afford it. Should I wait until I have enough money for insurance to buy a car?

CAR INSURANCE FOR A 16 YEAR OLD?

would it be more expensive for car insurance for a brand new car or a used car.

Received ticket for failure to report accident if found guilty will this make my insurance pay out void?

Was in one vehicle accident car written off insurance paid Still have court for failure to report accident need to know if found guilty will I have to pay the insurance company back

Very Cheap Car Insurance?

Hello, I need the cheapest insurance.I am from NY, please help.

Insurance: Average yearly mileage exceeded?

When I brought my car insurance (after being without a car for many years), one of the questions was average yearly mileage , I input 12,000 thinking that that figure was ...show more""

Whats the cheapest motorcycle insurance for me?

Im 18 i live in upstate New York. its my first street bike. I ride motocross and i have a 450f (if that makes any differance) im looking to get a crotch rocket (gsxr 1000) I heard progressive is the cheapest. How much?

""Auto Financing Insurance, does it exist?

Is there such a thing as auto financing insurance. i know when you apply for a credit card they ask you if you want insurance in case you lose your job or accident or whatever and they would make the payments for you. But do any companies out there exist that do this kind of thing for auto financing. Im going to be buying a car within a week and wanted to know Thanks

Whats cheap cars to insure for a new driver?

Hi there im currently undertaking my lessons and instructor said I should pass before march time and just wondering what cars are cheap to ensure for new drivers and how much roughly are they a month and is there any way I can knock it down to make a bit cheaper? can you get finance cars for new drivers with insurance and tax free for 3 years?

Which Insurance is better ?

Hi Guys , I'm a beginner in IT industry. let me know which insurance or Tax exemption Payments are better .. LIC, TATA AIG or Kotak insurance or anything else ..""

If you know about car insurance (10 points will be awarded )?

Hey, my older brother has a Honda HR-V 1.6 VTEC engine which is UK insurance group 9 and tax bracket F, I am looking at a Suzuki Swift Sport 1.6 engine, insurance group 9 and tax bracket E... my insurance is with my dads business who say i can have up to a 1.6, I learnt to drive in my brothers car but the insurance company are looking into whether or not i can have a Suzuki Swift Sport, it has no turbocharger, so what is the big deal 10 Points for best answer""

California life and health insurance exam?!?

I took it once but only got 60% and it was super difficult with only studying the pre licensing course. Can anyone give me some other materials or advice for getting a passing score. Please and thank you. And please no bulls**t answers-___-

Best car insurance company for me 10 points!!!!!!?

what is the cheapest+best auto insurance for me?!!!?!!?!!?!? we are a family of 4 and we all drive. we have a toyota 4x4, colorado, 1985 nissan truck, mustang v6. my youngest son has had 1 accident i'm 46 my wife is 46 and my sons are 18,19 i cant find a good car insurance they are all expensive!!!!!!!!!!""

Can my car insurance company drop me for having not at fault accidents?

I had Go Auto insurance on my 2 cars. Well over the courseof about 1-1 1/2 years (a year to a year and a half). I had about 3 wrecks. All not my fault. The other drivers were 100% at fault. After the third wreck, which was not to long ago. My insurance company (Go Auto) sent me a letter saying they weren't gonna let me renew my insurance with them because i was considered poor risk . Can they do this or should i contact insurance commissioner. No rude comments.""

Proof of insurance before transferring title and registering car?

After buying a used car from a private party, how do i purchase insurance if the title has not been transferred yet? I'm planning on switching to Geico. But, before i can purhase their policy, the title has to be under my name. For the title to be under my name, i need to transfer it to me; however, i need proof of insurance for this. HELP please. I need some answers.""

My own insurance?

In High school I was on my parents insurance and then I moved out with my boyfriend and got put on his parents insurance, but Im pretty sure his mom is lying to us about how much the insurance costs. We payed a varied amount (75-200) every 2 weeks for a couple months and then that same varied about after that per month. I feel bad about not trusting her but I want to have my own insurance. Mainly because I want to be self sufficient and pay my own everything! How do I go about getting insurance for me and my boyfriend?""

Rough cost of insurance group 17 cars?

Hi all, I'm looking at a Lotus Elise for my next car. Its insurance group 17 and I'm 25 with nearly two years no claims. Anyone know roughly what the insurance would be? Thanks xx""

Auto Insurance?

i need to renew my auto insurance next month i drive a Infiniti G35 and a Subaru wrx (not STI) can anyone tell me if they have ever purchased insurance for any of these vehicles and where was the cheapest i need full cov. on both. Or just anywhere its cheap, i live in central california (bakersfield) THANKS""

Where can I find info on LOW COST Medical Insurance In Central NY? (Student Artist Musician Business Owner)?

My wife and I are moving soon from PHX, AZ to the greater Syracuse area. I am moving my multimedia business / record label (websites, print design, videography, DVD production and studio recording) and I need information on which companies can provide my family reasonable cost heath insurance. Right now my wife works fulltime so we use her benefits, but we will be starting a family and would like to keep her at home for a few years. In PHX, health insurance for non-group individuals runs about $300 a month - from what I can see in CNY it can cost closer to $1000! Can some one help me with this? Am I looking at the wrong companies or is it just that mush more expensive? Are any loop holes? In some states Students, Artist, Musicians & Small Business Owners can get highly discounted rates - is this true in CNY? Can anyone help? Thanks in advance!""

Do I have to pay for insurance on a moving van rental?

I want to rent a moving van from Uhaul. They won't let me rent the van unless I pay for their insurance coverage. Is that legal?

Car insurance offence codes?

hi, i was trying to get a car insurnace quote online today when i realised that under the conviction section there are no codes that correspond to my licence. i am from Northern Ireland and have points currently on my driving licence, when i tried to enter my conviction codes for my insurance quote they were all different. the codes on the drop down list all started with 2 letters e.g. IN60, SP40 but the offence code printed on my licence all start with 50 e.g. 5010042 is this because they are Northern Ireland codes? how do i get my codes onto insurance quote?""

Driving from california to texas?do i really need insurance and a license?

im moving from california to rowlette,texas in two weeks but the problem is im going to drive out there its going to be me and my bf the thing is the car is under my name & i have the tags & papers but i don't have insurance & my license.Is this a big deal can i still drive out there as long as i drive carefully well im not driving its my bf his better at driving & he has his permit but im 18 & they say he can drive with a person 18 and older.what can i do i already called the insurance company & the lady said its not worth getting insurance if its only for a few weeks cuz when i get to texas i have to get new insurance.What can i do what do you guys recommened i do...i think that i can get out there without the legal stuff like insurance & a license..my sister drove all the way to arizona with no license & she didnt get caught cuz she drove carefully...""

Can you not buy a car unless you have insurance?

I'm looking at cars now and It seems like I can't but a car or do a title transfer unless I have insurance. So do I have to buy insurance before I even buy a car? My parents don't have insurance themselves...

""In NJ, Can you get a driver's lincense but not have car insurance or a car/drive? TEN POINTSS?""

I'm 18 years old, female. I've always wanted my driver's license. I have my permit that now expired. My parents won't let me get it because they don't want me to get into an accident and because they said insurance is sooo HIGH! Is it possible to pass my driver license test and not be on an insurance policy and not drive any car? Not drive at all, just own the license. I have a job and would get my own policy, but it would just be even more expensive!""

What is a reasonable cost estimate of business insurance for a cottage rental?

Looking to estimate small business insurance for a single unit cottage rental we are purchasing.

Steps to getting your life insurance license in CA?

I have no previous experience with Life Insurance and am considering getting my life insurance license. What are the steps involved, how long does it take, how much does it cost, and how difficult is the test? Anyone help?""

Will insurance total out my car?

When insurance companies figure out what your car is worth..do they go by the private sale value or retail? I got a bunch of hail damage and I see the claims dept. tomorrow..just wondering if they might total it out. Damage is just over $6,000...car is worth $6,500 - $8,700 depending on which way they look at it.""

Getting insurance for another persons car?

I'll be getting a loan of my brother-in-laws car while he's away serving with the army for 6 months and I'm trying to find the most cost effective way(s) of me getting insured for it for that duration. At the moment I have my own car with insurance, for myself and my wife (insurance is in my name), and I effectively want to use a second car. Ideally I wouldn't want my brother-in-law to have to pay insurance while he's away.""

Anyone knowing the best/cheapest auto insurance for young drivers?

Hello! I am a young driver (19) who is looking to buy a new 2007 ford mustang (the deep red color). I really want this car but it looks like there is no way that I will be able to afford the auto insurance for this thing. Anyone know the best company for me to speak with? Any advice or tips will help. Thanks!

Car insurance price for a Civic?

I am a 18 year old boy and I want to purchase a Honda Civic EX 4-door w/ a manual transmission. I am looking at a 2000-2005 or a 2006-2009 model. Could anybody give me an estimate of how much insurance is monthly? Thanks

Very Cheap Car Insurance?

Hello, I need the cheapest insurance.I am from NY, please help.

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/im-20-yr-old-female-much-would-cost-insure-14-2007-astra-kareen"