#but i think this is both important and interesting

[romanticfatale]

Love this. I love fashion and as trans man I have a particular interest in menswear both formal and alternative.

Understandably not an exhaustive from either myself nor OP by any means, but I wanted to suggest additional nuances:

(Made some edits)

Take your own measurements if you can. If you don't have measuring tape, you can use a ruler and a thread/rope, paper (standard US printer paper being 11 x 8.5 inches) and a bit of math, or other lengths of measure convenient to you.

Important ones are:

Bust: Across the chest and around your back centered to your nipples. If you wear a bra, take this measurement with a bra. To get your bra size, bend over if you can and measure across your nipples with how far they hang down.

Underbust: For bra-wearers, important to take for determining bra size. Equals band number. Subtract from the bra-less bust to equal cup size. Every inch of difference is a letter. Can be important to take if you wear an underbust corset, bra or not.

Waist size (where you prefer to have your pants hang) and natural waist size (typically across your belly slightly above your naval)

Hips, especially if you have wide hips.

Shoulder size mostly matters if you want tailored items or have broad shoulders. I have broad shoulders, and certain places/brands make for narrower shoulders. I still enjoy some womenswear blouses so shoulders have always been tricky for me.

Menswear is often determined by sleeve length, neck girth, waist size, and inseam (from the crotch to the ankle). I am very short so I have to tailor everything myself anyway, so it might not matter unless you're tailoring but most menswear minimum is about 30" inseam, 30" sleeve, and 14" neck. Waist I've seen as small as 24"

Get to know your shoe sizes in various measures. US men is typically 2 numbers smaller than US women's (US 8 women = US 6 men). As a USAmerican who also buys internationally, I like to know my Europoean size as well. Mens shoes in the US are difficult to find below US size 8, but not impossible.

Mens trousers are usually either pleated or flat front, meaning there are or aren't pleats in the waist. Sometimes there are multiple pleats. Pleated looks a little dressier.

"Slacks" and dress pants are the same. "Khaki" is a tannish or light brown color but "khakis" is often slang for tan colored Chinos, which are usually made of cotton. Dress pants are "dressy" as they are more formal in cut/pattern, color, and style.

Dress pants usually have buttons the same color as the fabric, and do not have rivets. Rivets on trousers, iirc, were originally a working class thing as it reinforces the pocket strength. Jeans have rivets and metal buttons. Sometimes Chinos have rivets and often metal button. Think of Chinos as "between" Jeans and Dress pants in both material and dressiness.

Remember to check your pockets in dress pants if they are sewn shut. This is typically intended to prevent dust, lint, and other things before purchase, and indicates they have not been worn.

"Trouser" and "Pants" are mostly the same thing depending on where you are. Some places in the US say trousers are dress pants whereas pants refer to any two-legged waist garment, but pants in the UK iirc are undergarments and trousers are all two-legged waist garments.

Gurkha Trousers are usually slightly higher waisted with a wider waistband and have a buckle instead of a button. They lean more formal, around the same area as Chinosbut can be as dressy as dress pants given material.

There is a difference between a Blazer, a Sports Coat, and a Suit coat, among many other kinds of coats.

A Blazer is usually intended to be emblematic of some sort of group, such as a school or a club. The buttons have said emblems on them, there may be an embroidered patch around the breast, and they are often the color of said group, sometimes a bright or noticeable color or vivid prints, hence "blazer"

A sports coat is a suit-like cut of coat but intended to be worn with any combination of colors. A suit coat is cut from the same cloth as the rest of the suit and is intended to be worn with the full piece, and typically has buttons the same color as the fabric like dress pants. Separating a suit coat from the suit is possible, but if you don't do it well you look very silly. Mix and matching pieces like this is called Spezzato, meaning "mixed" in Italian.

A suit is typically made as a two or three piece, meaning either a coat and trousers or a coat, waistcoat, and trouser.

A peacoat is a similar cut but thicker, warmer, and usually around hip or mid thigh. They are intended to be worn on top of a suit. An overcoat is similar but longer, typically knee length or longer.

Formal coats can be single or double breasted. Usually, you are not intended to button the bottom button of a formal menswear coat. Peacoats are always double breasted.

Double breasted sports coat can have various button configurations depending on how many buttons, where they're placed, and how much room you have in the waistline to move.

The lapels (the flaps around the collar) can also be stylized.

You may have noticed some lapels have a little hole in them, the lapel buttonhole. This is for a lapel pin or boutonniere. They are usually intended to showcase an emblem, such as for employees, officials, or other identification means and events (prom, religious orders, etc).

Some coat have "vents" which are the little slits in the back.

There are multiple types of waistcoats/vests as well. They can also be single or double breasted, they can have lapels, have v necks or "horse shoe" scoop-like necks. Similar to the sports coat, the bottom button should be left undone if it is single breasted. Double breasted waistcoats are usually fully buttoned, but the bottom can be left for slight more casual wear.

Wearing a waistcoat without a coat is totally acceptable and one of my favorite fashions. It also works well to hide binder seams.

I’m partial to tapestry coats and waistcoasts, meaning they are made of “tapestry” fabric, which is thick and usually wool with beautiful prints or embroidery.

In the US (at least where I am) we also call south asian vests Nehru vests (and also Nehru jackets which are the same but long-sleeve). They are waistcoats with band collars (aka mandarin collars).

Waistcoats usually have the back made of a different fabric, usually viscose or silk or similar. I never liked these personally since I don’t wear sports costs to hide them. Waistcoats that are the same fabric front and back are usually called cloth-backed.

Shoes: Oxford, Derby, Brogues: Oxford and Derby refers to the lace style.

Brogue refers to the cut of the shoe:

Different kinds of heels (and other shoes), as well:

Menswear is often harped on for being "boring" and there's two things I have to say about that: a) a lot of anglospheric "western" menswear is very very specific. Wearing pink will get some guys slurred at. However, you are allowed to have fun with it. You can wear a deep-v brightly colored sports coat without a shirt and have a huge chunky pearl necklaces with some bell bottoms and bright colred sunglasses. You can wear a "womens" coat and "womens" shoes with a suit.

It IS frustrating that so much of what is considered menswear in really specific western anglosphere IS boring because of extreme concepts of masculinity, but if you can sew you can also alter clothes however you like. Cut off the sleeves of a sport coat and reattatched them with ribbons, cut out lace or another color of fabric in long triangles and turn dress pants into two-toned bell bottoms.

Look at haute couture menswear to get some ideas, look at favorite celebrities and bands and films (prince, motley crue, malice mizer, billy porter, david bowie, legend, romeo and juliet, the color of pomegranates, the fall, etc etc) on how to bend masculinity and have fun with fashion.

As a queer and fashion-loving trans man, it's very important to me to put on the image of masculinity while also bending it. The "feminine in a masculine way" thing where if I'm going to be called an evil satanic freak for wearing earrings and black, I'd prefer to at least be gendered correctly.

Men and women’s wear differ often in the way they are cut, usually menswear being squared off where womenswear has hourglass figures. Menswear is also more often sturdier and thicker compared to more delicate womenswear fabric. Keep that in mind when mix and matching typically gendered clothes. A women’s blouse can look more squared off with a men’s vest, or a women’s vest can look nice with men’s trousers.

Seconding OP's comment about searching trend vs type, there Can be some good stores that are trying to advertise via style or trend but it's much better to curate your wardrobe more individually. I've had a similar discussion Here but essentially, even "normie" brands can be made alternative or more lively if you learn how to style properly.

Things like color, cut, and shape will affect how clothing looks on you.

I've always hated the idea that certain shapes, hairstyles, glasses, etc are "best" on someone. Round faces can wear round or square glasses or blunt bang bob haircuts or mullets all they want. They will each look different, yes, but it depends on what you want to look like and how to achieve that look.

For example, every now and then Macy's will have an out of season sale. 200$ clothing for 20$. It sucks that's how you have to shop for save money, but they're often well tailored and long-lasting across the brands they sell. I've beautiful dress shirts and trousers that work excellently for gothic-adjacent fashion.

Last but not least, times I think brand can matter:

Certain brands, not necessarily "big/expensive/luxury" brands but brands in general tend to have gimmicks, styles, materials, and other things they use often. If you like the way a particular set of trousers or a jacket you found either online or at the thrift store or any store feels and looks on you, look up the brand and see if they have similar items (and hope they still exist). I especially recommend this if you're a very tactile or sensory person, as finding a brand that consistently makes clothes that feel good on your body can be SO important.

Plus, more well known (but not necessarily luxury) brands and thrift will more often have better clothes than fast fashion anyway. Thrift because they're usually older clothes anyway and thus made in a time where they were already quality compared to now, and certain brands because they have an image and standard to keep.

There's quite a bit more across the entire fashion industry and it'snot something I'm much more well versed in than what I already posted or said, but this is what I have the energy to mention atm.

i dont consider myself a 'fashion guru' by any means but one thing i will say is guys you dont need to know the specific brand an item you like is - you need to know what the item is called. very rarely does a brand matter, but knowing that pair of pants is called 'cargo' vs 'boot cut' or the names of dress styles is going to help you find clothes you like WAAAYYYY faster than brand shopping

[kinardsevan]

i wrote a whole ass psychology breakdown (for the first time in FOREVER) about the break-up. enjoy (if you so choose):

so I've been reading a lot in relation to Tommy's speech during the break-up (and have actually gotten through the scene several times now, mostly as a creative reference for these fix-it fics. I think one of the first things that I've seen completely tossed aside (that bothers the shit out of me as someone with over a decade of therapy treatment and a psychology degree) is whatever trauma Tommy carries.

We know that there are issues with his dad. We know Lou's lore behind him is that he spent a lot of his childhood alone. We don't know anything in relation to his mom, but she may or may not be the cause of more trauma. We know that his way of dealing with abuse of authority is to shut down and follow the leader, which is likely a mix of his military time and growing up in his father's household (and when I say this, I mean from what we saw of him under Gerrard's command). This is a person who has put years into getting himself into some version of okay after all that he's endured, and we know he still generally does it on his own.

To that end, here, have my breakdown of the break up (roughly right about the time Buck says "I want you to move in with me"). (with pictures!)

Prior to the offer, we watch Tommy process through Evan's explanation about his relationship with Abby, things being transformative for him, etc. We have to bare in mind that this is where we also start to get what I've dubbed "starry-eyed Buck". He's so in the throes of what he's saying that I don't think he's really considering the connotation of his words. At the same time, Tommy doesn't know what lore Evan is about to drop him about this prior relationship. Remember that he now has to contend with the fact that they both have strong opinions on their relations toward Abby, and Tommy can't know if their feelings toward her as a person will be the same. I think Lou played this beautifully, appearing anxious and apprehensive as Tommy listened to Evan explain that Abby was transformative for him. Then he shifts into how Tommy has been transformative for him (which, he has, and we as the audience know this, but we understand it from a bigger POV than what Evan is saying with his words.)

There have been posts about Evan putting Tommy up on a pedestal throughout this speech (and really, possibly even sooner, but this is where we really get it expressed). Tommy tries to rectify this to a degree by countering "I wasn't always that way".

To that end, we then get Evan telling him "I know, and it just makes me admire you more." Tommy gives a bashful smile, clearly heartened by the statement, and even opening his mouth as though he's going to respond to it in some form. It would be interesting to know what was on Lou's mind of what (if anything) he thought would've been said there. Are there lines that were removed in this scene? Was 'I love you' actually going to come up? We can't really know. However, there's this part of me that thinks that Tommy thought that they were having a discussion on the depth of their relationship which would've possibly brought those 7 letters to the equation. Either way, this entire bit of facial acting is SO important, because it speaks volumes about how Tommy feels about how Evan feels about him.

From there we get the "I want you to move in with me, and this, THIS, THIS is such an important point for this ENTIRE scene. It's two seconds, but it holds SO much for the narrative. This man, who seems to be on the verge of ...something, clearly (who knows if I Love You was on his mind, or if it was just the fact that Evan was expressing how much he cares about him.) The reason this is all so important is THIS REACTION:

Now again, we don't know Tommy's trauma, but the joy literally drops out of his expression and shifts to panic. Now, speaking solely from the standpoint that these two haven't even said "I love you" yet, his boyfriend steamrolled over him from a possible declaration of love straight to moving in together without discussing semantics. Further, it's not even "I want to live together", it's "move in with me". We don't know much about Tommy's house (because these shitheads haven't built him a set yet), but we know that he has a HOUSE. With a GARAGE. Buck lives in a LOFT. Regardless of how much of an asshole this makes me sound like, it's crawling with red flags. It comes across as "fit more into my life" instead of "lets do this thing together". Further, if that's not bad enough, mention of getting engaged and married is thrown at Tommy as well, which holds two major bits of information: One, these are on Evan's mind. We've NEVER heard him talk about getting engaged or married to anyone. This speaks to the importance of their relationship to him, but the lack of I Love You also speaks on his own trauma. If we truly are getting the rom-com trope, at some point there's likely to be a conversation about why he lept over it (*cough* Taylor, his parents *cough cough*). Meanwhile, as he's continued in his starry-eyed speech, this is what Tommy is giving:

Now for those who don't know how to spot it, this my friends is a PANIC RESPONSE. The shift forward, the move to get up, the literal deep breath. He's having a panic attack. Now, obviously we don't know what brought this on, but god-willing, we WILL get the answers.

Now, to his own point, Tommy doesn't just straight up pop Evan's pink bubble. He does express that it's a sweet sentiment, but that it's a bad idea. To which point we get:

"Evan, that is so sweet. But I can't move in with you." "And why not?" Because. I know how this ends." "Uh, what-what's that supposed to mean?"

At which point, we clearly get the qualities about Evan that Tommy likes. "Incredible guy. Big-hearted. Hot as hell. Impulsive." I don't feel that the expression here matters as much as his tone of voice, because we can see on his face that he's expressing these qualities from a good place. The next point of reference isn't until Tommy's next line, when he says that Evan's reaction is out of things being "new and exciting".

To that end, the way Evan is talking to him makes this statement valid. He's not talking to Tommy like they've been together for six months and have built a relationship that should be moving in this direction. (For the tenth time I will repeat, he couldn't even dignify whether he was in love with Tommy when Josh asked).

Furthermore, I think when you consider this part of the scene, you also have to consider the strain in Tommy's voice. Something about those concepts (living together, getting engaged, married) is terrifying. It definitely gives the impression that Tommy has been faced with some version of this before and he got burned. Why is this important? Because of this:

"I'm saying no matter how bad I want it to be, I'm not your last." Those 9 words are important on their own, but when you couple them with the expression on Tommy's face and what we've just seen him go through, there's a clear point to the fact that he's been through this before. I also think that there can't be enough importance placed on the way he intonates "how bad". This is not a man saying no because he doesn't want to. He's backpedaling because he's sure that he's going to get burned. We get this point further driven home with this exchange:

"I'm your first." "But hey, they can be the same thing." "But, they usually aren't."

See this doesn't read to me as someone who's scared because he knows Evan has never been with another man. They're both fully grown adults who have had multiple relationships. What this speaks to me (now) as, is someone who has let someone convince him before that he would be their forever, that they were all in, and then broke him. When you include his childhood trauma and whatever abandonment issues it's left him with in correlation with all of this, yes, it's still an extremely biphobic set of lines. But in the context of what he's expressing and why, it's not about telling Evan he needs more experience, it's about telling him that he doesn't believe that he'll want to stay settled down with him six months, a year, etc., down the road. And THAT my friends, is abandonment issues 101. "Everyone else has left, so it doesn't matter that I'm in love with you, because you will leave too, and I need to protect myself from that."

Following that, we get this: "if I were to move in with you, you wouldn't mean to, you wouldn't plan for it, but you'd end up breaking my heart."

This line is SO important, right next to Evan's exchange with Josh about his relationship with Tommy. Why? Because even though neither of them have said it, it spells out that these two are in fact in love with each other, even if they haven't said it.

"I don't think I could deal with that." Tommy is fucking GONE on him. He's expressing that if he gave himself fully over to what Evan's referring to, losing him would break him. Again, we don't have the full picture on his trauma, but we know there's a mountain there. It's also worth noting again, that the intonation he uses in these statements clearly come across as someone trying to reign in their emotions and keep it together. That says to me that we're dangeously close to touching his trauma.

I don't feel like I have to include the final few bits of the scene in gifs because they're all over the site now, but the next line gives over the fact that he hasn't really been open about his trauma to Evan, given that his immediate response to expressing all of this is "I should go". This kind of reaction is generally brought on as not being accepted for having certain feelings. Now, obviously Evan is caught off guard by the entire interaction, the same way Tommy was (but for different reasons), so we have to take all of that into account when we think about the fact that instead of countering Tommy's logic, he asks instead if Tommy is breaking up with him.

Body language is also so important here for Tommy. His shoulders are hunched in, we see him wipe his face (meaning there are likely tears), and when he turns around, he's so caught up in whatever wave has taken him over that it takes Evan asking him for Tommy to state "yeah, I guess I did" about breaking up. Further, there's the fact that he states that he didn't see the break-up coming, which goes back to my point at the top of this post, that he clearly thought the conversation was going one direction, and instead it goes the other. From this point, we have Evan reeling, because he wants to create more of a life with Tommy, while Tommy is shutting down because of whatever is holding him back.

Finally, as I've referenced before, we get this line:

"Should've known that parking spot was too good to be true."

That line makes zero sense out of context, but in consideration of someone trying to lighten the weight they're carrying (which you can literally see by the way he has his hand on his neck, which you generally only see people do as a stress response). You can also double entendre this statement that getting to be with Evan was too good to be true. We get that little inhale with the smile, and I swear to God the only time I've seen that kind of reaction is right before someone cracks.

And then in closing, we get the "I'll see you 'round, Buck," our closing gut punch. Evan is still reeling, clearly. His face is very "what the hell just happened". Tommy is clearly not okay. This entire scene has opened an entire can of worms on them without a whole lot of answers.

Now, I've owned the fact that basically from the end of 806, I felt like this had to be a swerve, and that there has to be more to the story. I've also pretty much owned the fact that if the writers did actually just do this for kicks and don't have a resolution for it, I may not keep watching. However, in the context of the fact that, for the moment, I'm choosing to put hope in some kind of resolution, these lines make so much more sense. It is worth noting though, most people in the fandom, let alone the general audience, aren't going to psychologically break this shit down line-by-line. They're not going to lean into whatever trauma Tommy has that we don't know about yet. Its why the internet has been a mess since Thursday night. But it's also why I talk about how, when this situation gets resolved (because right now I refuse to say if), Buck has to give up the loft and give more of himself. Tommy, by the nature of the show, has fully immersed himself in Evan's life, but we haven't seen or heard mention of Evan doing so at all in Tommy's life. That doesn't mean he hasn't, but we haven't gotten any version of that. So when I say Evan needs to give things up... it's about matching what he's asking Tommy to give up. Because at the end of the day, when this circles back around, he's effectively going to be asking Tommy to trust that he won't break his heart like others have, and when you have a lifetime of abandonment issues and have learned to cope by being hyper-independent and alone, moving in the opposite direction is more terrifying than anything else. ESPECIALLY when you love that person, which we saw Tommy spell out. Evan has the ability to break him (and probably already is via this cut-off-at-the-quick break up.)

So, I'm really gonna need these shit heads to figure out that they'll be more miserable apart than they'd ever be together.

That's all. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

[arnivold]

Having played Emmrich's romance from start to finish I can say it does a shockingly good job of realistically portraying a romance with a significant age gap, speaking from experience as someone who once dated a guy in his fifties while I was in my twenties

Spoilers under the cut

So when you first start flirting with Emmrich, he doesn't assume you're being serious or doesn't even register it as flirting. Then he realizes what's going on and plays along with it. Then he starts flirting back, and uh oh we both acknowledged there's chemistry and now we have to figure out what we're gonna do with it.

Then you start dating. Or at least you're sorta dating. And your friends notice what's going on and immediately they voice their concerns. Are you sure this is a good idea? Happy for you but do you think maybe you're going a little too fast? Does the older person have bad intentions here? These are all questions the companions and even Hezenkoss ask in banter when you start the romance with Emmrich

And yeah when you first start dating someone new these questions don't seem to matter cause you're in love. You're charmed by Emmrich's gentlemanly ways, Emmrich likes the feeling of having a young person show interest in him because it makes him feel younger so he doesn't have to grapple with his mortality

But then as shit gets more and more serious and you near the end of Act 2, Emmrich wants to have a genuine discussion with you about the relationship. He's concerned that maybe this isn't such a good idea after all, because even though you both have the best of intentions, eventually you will have to deal with losing him and it will be decades before you have to worry about your own death.

And you have to ask yourself, is this serious or not? How are we gonna introduce each other to our families? Are you prepared to care for a sick/elderly spouse in your 40s and 50s? If you want to have children, are you prepared to handle having a partner who is already a generation apart from you and old enough to be your children's grandparent? How will it look when an older person in a teaching position is dating someone the same age as their students?

And for a lot of people these are serious obstacles to having a serious long term relationship! And discussions like that often do end in a fight like it does in Emmrich's romance! It happened to me in my relationship with an older man, too! It didn't work for me in my specific case but some people are able to work that stuff out, and in the case of Rook and Emmrich, they eventually do. But those are important discussions to have when you enter that kind of relationship

Idk man, the whole time I was romancing him I kept hearing the same comments my friends and family made about my relationship, the same arguments and discussions we had about the logistics of that kind of relationship, etc. etc. I figured they were just gonna go the route of indulgent wish fulfilment, and I was left slack-jawed when the game actually delves into the realities of dating in age gaps that large

[woso-dreamzzz]

Hair

Irene Paredes x Child!Reader

Summary: You help your Mami when she gets a red

You’ve travelled with Mami for once.

Mama is at home with your little brother Matteo but you’re not really worried.

You’re a good traveller. Mami says so because you were born when she used to play in France so you’re used to going back and forth between countries. You know how to amuse yourself by playing or doing your homework or your reading.

Mami says you’re very responsible.

Since coming home to Spain and to Barcelona, you’ve not travelled as much. You’ve stayed with Mama at home even though travelling and going on planes is much more interesting.

You don’t know why Mami decided you could come with her this time but you have and you’re happy.

Or you were happy until Mami got her red card.

You’re not quite sure what happened apart from the fact that her leg was too high.

You know all about high legs.

At Taekwondo, your teacher explains all about how head shots are very dangerous because the head is a very important part of your body and that’s why people wear caps to protect them during sparring.

You’re still kind of small (but growing all the time!) so you’re not allowed to do any head shots of your own. But you know they’re dangerous and you know Mami is not going to argue her card even if someone else will.

“Mami?”

“Go back to the bench, squirt,” Irene says as she breezes past you to the locker rooms.

When you were younger, that used to work but you’re nearly eight now and Mama says you’re moving under your own power so you think that means that Mami’s orders don’t work on your anymore.

“No!” You say stamping your foot right in the tunnel.

Irene scrubs a hand over her face as she turns around to face you. “I don’t have the patience to deal with a tantrum right now, squirt. Go back to the bench and finish watching.”

You stamp your foot again. “I’m not having a tantrum, you’re having a tantrum!”

Irene sighs. “If you come with me now, you’re not allowed back out. We stay in the locker room. But you can keep watching the match if you head back outside.”

Your foot goes again. “With you.”

You’d inherited her stubbornness, Irene notes. Her hair. Her eyes. The tight set of her jaw. And her stubbornness.

Irene holds her hand out for you. You take it.

You’re a different beast to your brother.

Matteo is still small, still practically a baby. She and Lucia had been worried about the age gap between you both. At nearly eight, you towered over him with your toys and your rambunctious nature.

You were not unlike Lucy and Keira’s (and increasingly Ona's) Pup but maybe a bit lower energy now that you’re gotten older. More disciplined is what Lucia would say, now that you’ve had your energy redirected into Taekwondo. Disciplined and strangely emotionally intelligent.

Irene supposes she should pat herself on the back with that. She’d never agreed with hitting kids even if it’s a little scuff on the back of the head to redirect them. No whacks, no spanks, no hits.

She talked your through your emotions and now that you were older, you were able to talk her through them too.

You hold her hand now as she walks back to the locker room.

“Mami, are we showering?”

“Aren’t you a bit too old to shower with me, squirt?” She teases, grabbing her toiletries and a towel. “You’re nearly eight now.”

You puff out your chest at the reminder. “I’m not going in with you! Just wanted to know.”

“I’m going to shower. You can take a shower if you want but you have to come into mine if you’re going to be washing your hair.”

You tug at the end of your braid.

Lucia likes your hair long and Irene has to admit that she does too.

You’d come out with a full head of hair, screaming and crying your arrival to the world as Irene panted from all the energy she’d spent pushing you out. Screaming, crying, with thick hair as you were gently rest on her chest.

Your hair had remained just as thick as then, growing quickly to the point that regular trips to get it cut were needed.

But washing it was always a challenge. Lots of shampoo. Lots of conditioner. Lots of time spent in the tub trying to get it all washed.

It’s part of the reason why it’s done in the morning too. You hate the hairdryer but you hate sleeping with wet hair even more so washing it is always done in the morning so it can air dry before bed.

“Wash my hair?” You ask and Irene nods.

“You’ll have to shower with me then if we’re washing your hair. Is that okay?”

You nod. “Uh-huh.”

“Alright, squirt. Let’s go.”

Irene’s original plan was to drown herself in the shower, to stay there until the match was over and she could finally face her teammates again. The red card was justified, she knows that but it doesn’t mean there isn’t still a bit of a sting.

She was happy to leave you on the bench, safe with the others so Irene could wash away her anger and resentment while you were occupied.

But now you’re here with her, asking to have your hair washed and looking up at her like you just know she needs something like this to keep occupied.

It’s an easy routine to get through, to lather her hands with shampoo and massage it into your scalp. To wash it all out before moving onto the conditioner.

Two rounds of conditioner and you look up at her with a smile.

“I can wash your hair now, Mami?” You ask and Irene laughs, pushing away the wet strands from your face.

“I think you’re a little small to be doing that, squirt.”

You puff out your cheeks. “Are you sure? I’ve definitely grown since Mama last measured me!” To demonstrate, you stretch up to your tiptoes and reach as high as you can.

“Maybe when you’re taller,” Irene says placidly,” Come on. Grab your towel and we’ll get out.”

Irene’s just gotten yours and her own clothes on by the time that everyone else has arrived.

“Whoa,” Jenni says as she comes in,” You’re dripping everywhere, squirt!”

Irene sighs as she turns around. “You should have seen just how wet it was earlier. Absolutely everywhere.”

“We can tell,” Codi snickers,” There’s a river to the showers.”

“I’ve braided it back again,” Irene offers up weakly as she watches Alexia crouch in front of you.

“You know you’ll have to sleep with that wet hair,” Alexia reminds you.

You giggle. “No, I won’t. We call Mama and Matteo tonight. Mama will see my hair. She won’t let Mami put me to bed with wet hair. She says it’s naughty.”

“Devious,” Alexia says approvingly.

You high five her and look back at Irene, who shakes her head fondly at you.

“We’ll be having words about your eversion to the hairdryer.” She wiggles her finger teasingly at you and you grin.

You stick your tongue out. “You have to talk to Mama first.”

[it-may-be-dull-but-im-determined]

I mean... I have gone through phases of reading something like a hundred books a year for absolutely no reason other than I've been a compulsive reader forever? And that (plus undiagnosed ADHD ahahaa) does tend to make you read some things really really fast? Not everything, and it's not a bad thing as such.

I ran across both of these today and I just

I mean there are a fair few different things going on here:

Big chunks of text aren't the easiest for anyone to read, and on a purely functional level they do tend to interrupt the flow of reading. If you read fast, you do tend to automatically skim longer paras, pick out the odd word and assess how relevant the whole section really is to pay attention to. It's a valid and recognised reading technique (literally how they reach speed reading) and if you do realise you've missed anything important, you can always go back and check (one reason I prefer reading to audiobooks).

That tiktoker is talking pretty specifically about a particular genre, and I don't think it's that controversial to say a fair amount of that genre can be considered skimmable if you're not reading it for the writing per se - romantasy particularly is mainly targeted at adults but a fair amount of it is then written at a YA level. It's deliberately predictable and not designed to be challenging to read (there is a whole other essay to be written about communicating information and which reading level you choose for that). Sometimes you just like the trope or the characters or a setting or something and that's all you want from a (very long) book. Skimming is a totally reasonable way to approach that.

If you have ADHD especially, then a lot of the time it feels like you're trying to outwit and outpace your attention span whenever you start a new book (literally the same reason I have to binge TV shows or I forget they exist between episodes). Sometimes the choice is between finishing the book really really fast before you lose interest, putting it down and completely forgetting what happened (or that it exists at all), or chucking it on the DNF pile where it will taunt you as yet another thing you failed at :)

Which is to say that sometimes skimming is the only technique that lets you finish a book, and finishing a book does your self-esteem a whole world of good if you frequently beat yourself up for being flakey.

I cannot stress enough that most books aren't inherently skimmable but that person is talking about specific books that are, for them. It's not about being disdainful about reading or books, it's about wanting to read and finding a method that works best for you.

These people have to be stopped

[lunarsilver]

What do your spirit guides want to tell you?

For this reading, I used a deck with only Major Arcana, to get more general but "big", powerful messages. This is what your spirit guides want to tell and advise you really bad.

Arts are from volume covers of Jibaku Shounen Hanako-kun.

REMEMBER

I’m not a doctor, a psychiatrist, a therapist nor a psychologist. Divination will never replace meetings with them.

It’s a general reading, so not everything will resonate.

If you can’t choose between two piles, probably both of them have some messages for you. You can also not identify with any of them, and that’s okay, too.

Readings can help you make a decision, but they shouldn’t be the main reason for making it.

1 ~ 2 3 ~ 4

PILE 1

Temperance - The High Priestess - The Sun R - Back of the Deck: The Emperor R

Maybe because the first two cards in my deck present women, plus especially because of the High Priestess, but what comes to my mind immediately is “femininity”. This is an encouragement to lean more into what is traditionally feminine. The more I look into the cards, the clearer this message is - there’s Temperance, the card of balance, there’s the feminine High Priestess, and there’s the masculine Emperor in reverse. Temperance asks you to balance your life more. Work-life balance, logic-emotions balance, as well as how you act around people. Your spirit guides suggest trying to work together and be a team player, both Temperance and the High Priestess tell you this. The High Priestess is also an invitation to trust your intuition more, to tap more into your spirituality. Maybe your spirit guides would like to talk more to you, and they wish you would let them. With the Sun in reverse, they suggest you should have some fun, do what brings you joy, and listen to your inner child. The Emperor in reverse suggests you could have a not fully healthy relationship with your traditionally masculine traits (I want to make this clear - I always write “traditionally” for a reason, think about it as your relationship with what society expects of you, with gender stereotypes). Your spirit guides want you to reflect on how you look at your relationships with other people. Treat them as your equals, they’re neither better nor worse than you. It won’t resonate with everyone, of course, but I keep having this image of someone working an office job who is kind of bitter and so focused on one aspect of their life that they forget the little joys of life and don’t treat their coworkers/subordinates nicely. So, to sum it up, reevaluate your priorities, find some time to be alone with your own thoughts, with your hobbies, and try to treat other people equally. And give your spirit guides a call.

PILE 2

Temperance R - The Hierophant R - The Hanged Man R - Back of the Deck: The Fool 

It’s interesting how, just like in Pile 1, the first card is Temperance, but this time in reverse. Similarly, the message here is to reevaluate what you give attention to and balance your life, but it’s even more urgent. It’s not wise to spend too much on something or to focus on only one aspect of your life, ignoring other ones. Your spirit guides tell you to put some time into self-healing and taking care of yourself. Maybe some home spa would be good, nurturing both your body and mind. Next, the Hierophant in reverse is all about making your own path, challenging the status  quo, and not caring as much about the approval of others. Your spirit guides encourage you to find your own voice and speak your mind. Do what is right for you. The reversed Hanged Man tells you it’s time to stop living your life on autopilot and actually start doing something. Think about what you would like to do, make a plan and do it. The Fool at the back just highlights how much your spirit guides want you to embark on a new journey. Don’t be scared of new beginnings. This whole reading emphasizes how important it is to make some changes in your life, and while doing so, keep in mind what will make you happy. You, not someone else. You are the master of your own fate, nobody else can live your life for you. Your spirit guides are with you, so stop merely existing and start to live. It may be scary at first, but you’ve got it!

PILE 3

The Star R - The Magician - The Hermit - Back of the Deck: The Wheel of Fortune

Right off the bat, there’s a lot of gold and some brown, white and blue color-wise, which makes me feel you should take a closer look at your finances and your earthly matters, but also don’t forget about the more spiritual things. Another interesting thing is how the Magician and the Hermit have a similar pose, both with their arms raised, as if creating something out of thin air or launching an attack. Now, getting to the cards themselves, you had a harder time, huh? The Star in reverse tells me that you could start to doubt whether there is something good for you in this life, whether some higher forces are there for you - and here your spirit guides are, screaming that yes, they are here for you, they always are. So nourish yourself, remember what’s important for you and what you want to do, and do it. The Magician says that, once you get in the right mindset, you have everything needed to manifest your desires. Stop self-loathing, stop procrastinating, it’s time to do the THING. Your passion project, your art, your book, your dance. With the Hermit, your spirit guides encourage you to look inward and take some time for yourself. As I wrote at the beginning, both the Magician and the Hermit in this deck have similar poses, they both create something, and they lay here next to each other. At the same time, there’s this interesting contrast, as one is more dark and blue and kind of nocturnal, while the other is gold and bright. I think these parallels are here to tell you how important it is to both think and act, as only then will you  create what you want. Only thinking about your goal won’t take you anywhere, only acting without thinking can lead to a catastrophe. With the Wheel of Fortune, your spirit guides once again tell you that you’re not alone and everything is temporary, nothing lasts forever. You may feel hopeless right now, but “this too shall pass”.

PILE 4

The Moon - The Chariot R - Strength - Back of the Deck: The Hermit

This pile is all about being with you yourself. Your spirit guides encourage you to have some alone time and not act recklessly. The Moon is about your fears - your spirit guides encourage you to deal with them and stop running away. However, it’s more about healing your inner child and doing some shadow work than about dealing with them in a more physical way. Write a journal, think about therapy. There are some issues here that you need to work through. Tap more into your intuition and be patient, as you may not have the full picture right now. Next, the Chariot and Strength are both about, well, strength - but the Chariot is more about the outer strength and will, while Strength is more about the inner one. And here we have the reversed Chariot. Both of these cards together emphasize how you should work on your self-discipline and commitment. You have this kind of quiet strength for influencing and persuading without raising your voice. This kind of confidence and strength is not as visible as the loud one, but it isn’t a reason to underestimate you. The Hermit at the back yet again tells you to look into yourself and spend some time with your thoughts. Your spirit guides think you can do a lot of things once you start dealing with your fears and insecurities and realize you can be powerful in more ways than one. Your inner strength is your power.

[respectthepetty]

To begin episode ten of Jack & Joker with Jack and Joke laying in Jack's bed with his color on them (not a euphemism) and Joke's color disregarded on his bed hurts a bit in retrospect knowing how it all ends in that hospital waiting room.

Because although Jack was much lighter the next day, and Joke was back in his signature red,

The color quickly started draining from the community.

So while Joke wanted Jack to live happily in their little colorful bubble the same way Rose attempted before with Jack, everyone else was losing their color adjusting to their new realities.

Joke has always been quick to abandoned his color in preference for Jack's, so it was nice to see that the sign they made incorporated both of their colors, and their daughter, in pink, was the love between them.

So the boys continued to live in their colorful bubble

But, once again, just as Aran immediately pointed out about Rose's grand entrance,

This little colorful bubble is all fake.

So as much as I was thrilled that Aran made matching buttons for Tattoo to wear with him that incorporated a blue background and red heart for the main couple ,

It wasn't long before Aran willingly gave up his heart to Hoy. And I think that is important. Nobody is really being selfish here. They continue to do everything for others, and they sacrifice for others. Aran gave his button to Hoy so he wouldn't be sad. Tattoo stole the necklace so his mom wouldn't get hurt. Joke stole the ring so Jack could be free.

Jack is lighter, so obviously it worked! But I think this is also why the color is draining from all the others as well. They are community, so their colors align as they have matured, which brown represents.

But brown is also a sign of decay and sadness, so even when Jack and Joke (and Aran) try to escape being part of a community and live selfishly in their own happy bubble, the hurt of the community will still seep through.

They can't just simply walk away from it.

So it's amazing that the kids are the brightest of the bunch.

They are impacted just as much as the adults, but where the adults are resigned to the fact that this life, the kids still have color and the willingness to fight, together.

Joke with a little of his red had to convince to group of adults to fight together because as Hoy said, it's easier to fight as hundreds against an army of ten, and when Toi Ting came up with a plan, the other kids quickly followed their leader.

Which is why I think Aran is so important to this plot. His father is gaining power like Thanos, and his aunt has directly and indirectly helped him attain it, but even though Aran wants to run away from the fight, he continues to stay and help the community when he doesn't have to. He started off selfish, yet he gives Hoy his heart when he doesn't have to. He makes Jack a hat. He helps Joke steal the ring. He is part of this community. But he is also the outcome of his family.

Boss and Nang are two extremes. The reveal that they are siblings who parents died due to the Four Horsemen's actions makes their dynamic more interesting because they have dealt with this trauma in completely different ways. Nang, in her white, tells her followers to abandon the power money has over them by ridding themselves of their possessions, while Boss, in his black, decided inheriting power through oppressing others was the only way to achieve success.

Yet Nang helped her brother. Several times. So regardless of what she wanted, she still helped the person she loves just like all these other characters have done.

And just like everyone else, the consequences are dire.

Aran has proven that a person can't be selfish like his father but a person shouldn't sacrifice their entire life for others like Nang. There must be a balance. He couldn't sacrifice himself and marry Rose for his dad, and he is still true to himself while helping others in the ways he can.

He knows that sometimes, the best way to support others is by simply being there for them, which is something he never got without paying people.

So in the end, Joke, who is at his lowest in that hospital waiting room, has the hands of his friends on him to comfort him in his time of need.

And Jack, even though alone in his grief, is still wearing Joke's red.

No man is an island.

And nobody can change the world on his own.

Because people need people. People need to know they are supported and loved. People need to know they aren't being judged and that their burdens can be shared.

And Aran has shown that.

Because Tattoo helped him understand it.

[vianbarnes]

my buddie going canon ideal scenario and why it could happen before eddie fully realises he’s gay

i’ve been cooking up this scenario for a while now but before going into it i wanna clarify that i don’t think eddie’s homosexuality is tied to buck and just that. i could write a full essay about eddie’s queerness without even mentioning buck. HOWEVER i do think buck could be the key to eddie’s discovery, the last puzzle piece that makes it all make sense.

narratively speaking, i think it could be interesting to see buck and eddie get to the same conclusion (that they’re in love with each other) but in the complete opposite way. while for buck it’s oh shit i’m bi > oh shit i’m in love with eddie, for eddie it would be oh shit i’m in love with buck > oh shit i’m gay. and obviously eddie is starting his own journey just now, so he might realise he’s gay and then it could click for him that all he’s been looking for was there all along, but i do think that - since this is a tv show - it would be interesting to offer a different side of the story to the audience. and yes i know that buck’s queerness and eddie’s queerness are very different already, but i’m specifically referring to their storylines leading up to buddie. (also this is just a personal side note but i think i would be lowkey crazy to have both of them realise they’re queer and still not understand their feelings for each other, like i know they’re dumb and dumber but c’mon!!!)

ok so now let’s put on the tinfoil hat

we literally know nothing about what’s gonna happen in the next episodes so i don’t have any solid theory on how we could get to this scenario. some of the interviews were teasing some potential tension (or angst even) between buck and eddie so my brain took this information and ran with it. a lot of us were also theorising a nde for buck, for eddie or for both of them at the same time and that could also be the setup for what i’m thinking.

but first let’s analyse where buck and eddie are right now (and in the upcoming episodes)

buck was just broken up with so now he’s trying to explore his sexuality and understand it more. it feels like the search for “his last” has just started and he’s excited to look at relationships and love through a new lens, but he also might feel a little discouraged that he has to do it all over again. he might be thinking “now that i have all these new possibilities, why is it still so hard to find my person?” (average bisexual experience i will tell you that much).

eddie on the other hand is slowly trying to forgive himself and love himself, accepting joy and not pushing away his desires and needs. allowing himself to feel certain feelings and just let go. he’s taking small steps to show up for himself just like he does for his loved ones every day (we still don’t know how far they’re gonna go with his story so the next episodes are definitely gonna be interesting)

so, with all that being said, here’s how buddie could go canon:

it’s late and buck shows up at eddie’s house. they’re in the kitchen drinking a beer, both leaning on the counter and not looking at each other at first. something has happened between them that they need to clear up (could be an argument, a fight or some very important words exchanged when they thought they were about to lose the other).

as much as i love a “because i love you!!” screamed during an argument, i don’t see that happening in this scenario. i imagine them having the softest, most honest and open conversation where they lay it all out - without even realising what they’re doing. at some point, buck is gonna say something that will make it finally click for eddie. if it’s an argument he could say something like “i need you in my life”/“i want you in my life forever”, or if this happens after a nde he could say “i can’t imagine my life without you”/“i don’t know how i could live without you” (i’m not a writer but you get the gist lol)

and that’s when eddie finally allows himself to feel what deep down he’s been feeling for years, and so he leans over and kisses buck. the kiss is pretty short: eddie pulls away almost immediately, as if his body was possessed by something and he just snapped out of it. buck can’t believe what just happened, but it takes him just a few seconds to realise and to grab eddie’s face and kiss him back. they start making out, they go out of frame, the screen turns black, the episode is over.

now let’s talk about the aftermath of the kiss. because if we know 911 we know that this goddamn show can’t let people just be happy so of course there’s gonna be some angst and miscommunication.

after the kiss, they don’t really talk about it. they might even get interrupted by something else (maybe eddie has to go to texas to get chris back?) so they have to postpone the what the fuck just happened conversation. and that’s when both of them start to spiral, but for different reasons. buck of course thinks that eddie’s distance means that he regretted the kiss, that they got caught up in the moment but that he doesn’t feel that way about him and he basically ruined their friendship. eddie is also freaking the fuck out: he’s panicking about how they could make their relationship work, how they could tell christopher, he’s questioning literally his whole life and past relationships like oh my god have i been gay this whole fucking time??, he’s worried about their jobs, how they’re gonna tell bobby and the others. basically questioning everything but buck.

being the idiots that they are, they’re gonna convince themselves that the other regretted everything and they’re gonna avoid each other and never have that much needed conversation. the 118 obviously notices that something is off, but no one knows what it is. until hen and eddie finally talk and he tells her everything: what happened, what made him panic and doubt everything and what’s stopping him from talking to buck. hen is shocked but not necessarily surprised. her and karen look at eachother (yes karen is there too because of eddiekaren bestfriendism that is very real to me) and then hen says something like “i don’t have the answers to all of these questions, but i’m sure of one thing: you love him and he loves you. you can figure out the rest together. go talk to him” (i think it would be nice for eddie to have this conversation with henren as a couple, since his biggest fears and concerns are about how they could make the relationship work)

eddie feels like he just woke up from a 20+ year long sleep. he runs out of hen’s place, hurrying to his car, and from now i’m picturing a full romcom montage with him just fighting for his life to get to buck’s apartment: traffic, construction work so he has to take a detour, his shirt is drenched in sweat so he has to go back home to change because surely he can’t show up at buck’s looking like that. once he gets home, he sprints to his room to find a new shirt (maybe he puts on too much cologne - the one buck likes - and he has to change again. just because it would be fun to see him in distress). he fixes his hair for the 100th time, grabs his keys, finally opens the front door and stops in disbelief. buck is on his doorstep, hand mid-air about to knock. they look at each other and in that moment they just know. they both lean in and go for the kiss aaand BUDDIE CANON !!!! (+ the buck at eddie’s door parallel finally having the romcom resolution it always meant to have)

of course i have no clue how we could get there, but i do feel like it would be true to the show if they didn’t immediately get together and if there was some angst between them. i hope that once they get together they won’t try to break them up (even just temporarily) so they might have to go through some shit at the very beginning of their relationship for that to happen.

alright tinfoil hat OFF folks. i always try to stay consistent to the show and only come up with theories that i could truly see being developed and i don’t think any of this is unrealistic. buuut i’m still a clown so who knows. quite frankly i’m fine with buddie canon either way (as long as their first kiss is initiated by eddie and it happens in his kitchen <3)

[nightwingsbf]

It’s been three years since I wrote this post and I think I finally have a word to explain what Taichi was feeling on both of those scenarios: undeserving.

Who was he to have a say in the life of another creature? Who was he to take such an important spot in another’s’ life? Surely there must have been someone better suited than him that would handle the situation, he must have thought. That’s how little confidence he had on himself and his own feelings. Was he really the type of person that would save a cat? What he really enough to be by Touma’s side?

That’s why he always took the safe route: only hung out with people who shared his interests, stopped dreaming of becoming a toy maker or anything related to that, never acknowledged what he felt for Touma. He felt undeserving of things that were “out of his reach”.

The end of the manga had him becoming friends with other people, opening up his circle, studying to go to university, being honest with Futaba about what he wanted, accepting and acknowledging what he meant to Touma and what Touma meant to him, and finally, being open enough to accept his love at the end.

AGHHH. What a fucking great story. Time for a reread.

Ao No Flag Parallels: Touma and the Cat

In chapter 10, Taichi has a dream in which he and Touma are little and talking about what they will do in the future; Touma says he will be a baseball player and then it turns into: What about you? You said it too, didn't you? You also have one. Something you want to do.

Then they proceed to show both the cat Taichi couldn't save, facing him, as if he is the one talking to Tai, and Touma appearing right when the words are something you want to do.

Apparently there is a parallel between “The Cat Incident” and little Touma losing his parents.

The cat could be some unfinished business Taichi had, something he chickened out on and regretted for the rest of his days.

I’d say that the cat symbolizes cowardice, but it’s also a way to show how hard on himself Taichi is. Even though the “right” thing to have done in that case was to save the cat, especially when he wanted to save the cat, something stopped him. Maybe the fear of the cat dying on him anyway. But still, he was a kid.

The situation shows us that Taichi is self-conscious, hard on himself and doubts and second guesses every single thought and decision that occurs to him. I don’t think it’s because he doesn’t know what he wants, it’s only this self-consciousness of having to deal with the choice that stops him. Itachi gives an idea of it:

Itachi suggests that Taichi is indeed indecisive and slow. However, he still meddles unexpectedly, because despite whatever his anxiety is telling him, he can’t help but care. This is what leads him to help Futaba and save the cat. There are two situations that could put him in harm’s way, but he does it anyway.

Now, how do we connect all of this with the Touma situation? Well, here’s when the parallel takes place. We can see that, in the dream, Touma and the cat are both looking at Taichi, expectantly, accusingly. They are both there, small and lonely; and Taichi is there in the back, unmoving.

And what is it that happens? In the cat 's case? It dies. In Touma’s case? Akiko comes and fills a space that is… supposed to be his? Why is that paralleled with dying? What dies there?

So, why? Why are Touma and the cat symbols of his unfinished business? We know about the cat, but why Touma? What is left unfinished with him?

[lenaswritingandstuff]

Right again • Tom Riddle x f!reader

Requested: No

Pairing: Tom Riddle x f!reader (+ SPOILER x f!reader)

Summary: Tom, who always thought relationships were meaningless, changed his mind when he met y/n. He plans on telling her how he feels, however, it doesn't go as planned, and he finds himself to be right - again.

Word count: 1.1K

Warnings: Fluff; angst; English is not my first language.

A/N: It wasn't supposed to be this long lmao. I will write the same plot with Mattheo, Draco, Lorenzo and Theo in the future - hopefully with a better title lol. PLEASE PLEASE DON'T LET THIS FLOP OR YOU WON'T SEE ME ON HERE AGAIN LOL. Comments and feedback are always appreciated. Sorry for the typos. Hope you enjoy it! xx

Tag list: @helendeath @im-jesus @wolfyychan @blocked-zombieartist

Tom Riddle was in his dorm, one of the only places in Hogwarts where he could be by himself, and where he could be doing the things he enjoyed the most - studying and reading, both in silence. But, despite being currently sitting on his desk - always perfectly arranged -, he was not currently reading a book or studying. Instead, he was doing something he never thought he would do and was feeling something he never thought he would feel: thinking about a girl, and being nervous about a girl. 

Contrary to Mattheo and his friends, Tom has never cared for relationships - he could barely bear being around Mattheo’s friends if serious, meaningful discussions or activities weren’t involved. Sure, he cared for Mattheo, more than he cared to admit, because they were of the same blood. And for Tom, blood was one of the things that mattered the most, alongside loyalty, knowledge and influence. 

And y/n. 

Tom had always thought Mattheo was the only person he could ever care for - after all, they needed to have some sort of loyalty towards each other if they wanted to have a chance to fight their father - but, just like he was surprised to learn he did not want to follow his father in his quest for tyranny, Tom was surprised to find himself caring for y/n. 

Just like he had never cared for friendship, Tom had never cared for love. He did not think it was a weakness as his father did, but he did think it was not as important as people made it out to be. And, also, why care for love when something terrible, something that would likely cost lives was being prepared? 

But then again, y/n challenged that idea. Despite being in the same house and the same year, it took Tom several years to properly notice her. He knew she was one of Mattheo’s close friends outside of his usual group, and that gave them occasions to spend time together. Strangely, Tom had first found her company more tolerable than the others - she seemed to understand his will for silence, deep conversations and his interests, seemed to have the same thirst for knowledge. She was kind as well, having what people called “a heart of gold”, always ready to help anybody in need. She was also warm and funny, two things she shared with Mattheo, and it usually didn’t take people enough to want to be her friend. Tom had considered y/n the closest thing he had to a friend, and he thought he would stay that way until, one day, he saw her and Mattheo sitting closer to each other than usual, and he felt something strange, something he didn’t expect to feel, and something he struggled to understand - jealousy. He didn’t think it was that at first, but it became obvious it indeed was jealousy when he found himself wishing that he was the one sitting next to her, and not Mattheo. 

From that moment, he kept thinking about y/n in ways he had never done before - how beautiful she was, how he loved her smile, how he wanted to hold her hand, to smell her addictive perfume, to be the person who mattered most to her… how he wanted to hold and kiss her. He had considered those thoughts as foolish at first and tried to not have them, but everytime he was with y/n, they came back running, and he sometimes had to restrain himself from sitting closer to her just to smell her perfume when they were in class, or to hold her hand when they were studying in the library. He didn’t have anybody to ask questions to - Mattheo would laugh at him - so, like he always did, Tom gave himself the answer: it was love. At first, he thought it was only temporary and it didn’t even cross his mind to tell her about it, but he was forced to admit that, instead of disappearing, those feelings became stronger with each day passing. The idea displeased him, and he tried to avoid y/n so these feelings would go away, but it was in vain, and only made him miss y/n - and made him love her more. But one day, as he was sitting on his desk busy thinking about her instead of studying, the idea of just telling her how he felt seemed right. Of course, the idea of rejection secretly terrified him, but he would accept simply being her friend. y/n deserved a loyal, sincere friend and that is what Tom was. All she had to do was give him a chance he could be the boyfriend - the word seemed so meaningless compared to what he felt - she deserved, a boyfriend who would be loyal, caring, sincere, and who would put her and her needs and safety first.  

Thus, he got her favorite flowers, and, having thought about what to say to her for hours, decided to go and ask her to have a moment of her time. And now the time had come. He grabbed the bouquet, and, trying to pull himself together, left his dorm. At that hour, y/n should be in the common room. With a bit of luck, she would be alone. Tom headed for the common room, which was nearly empty except for two first years laughing. He started looking for y/n, and his heart, which had started to beat faster with nervosity and hope, almost broke. 

y/n was indeed here, standing in a corner of the room - kissing Mattheo, who had a hand on her waist and the other in her hair. He broke the kiss, looked at her in a way Tom had never seen him and y/n had a smile before Mattheo pressed his lips on hers like he couldn’t help it. 

Tom took a step back, and the only thing that stopped him from dropping the bouquet was the noise he knew it would make. He turned around and quickly yet silently went back to his dorm - where the flowers finally met the ground. His back against the door, he almost wanted to laugh now. How could he have been so foolish? It should have been obvious to him from the start that y/n, warm and kind y/n, would prefere Mattheo, Mattheo would everybody loved or at least fond of, who had no problems making friends and be with people, Mattheo who had never been anything like their father. Mattheo, who people didn’t intimidate or rightfully found cold and strange. 

You’ve won, brother. 

As always, Tom Riddle found he had been right. Love was meaningless, and he should never have cared for it - should have never cared for her - in the first place. 

He was right, but for the first time in his life, he wished he wasn’t.

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[citrusandrottefruit]

Modern!Steddie (This is based on something I read a while back on Tumblr about Eddie becoming famous, Steve getting doxxed, and years later singing Hozier's Francesca to Eddie. I'll look for the fic, and if I find it, I'll put the link here.) EDIT: This is the fic here, guys. I recommend reading it. (https://archiveofourown.org/works/48091627/chapters/121266283)

Steve has always been one of the popular kids, but not the kind of childish villains you see in movies. No, he was popular because he was handsome, had rich parents, was charismatic, and was good at sports. He didn't bully other kids, but he wasn't interested in them either.

He never felt the need to seek out new connections at school, because he'd had Tommy and Carol for years, and anyone new who wanted to talk to him would come to him. He didn't have to work hard to make new friends.

His time was spent on sports and the friends he already had. The occasional girlfriend, too, because he'd always been a romantic at heart and a lonely kid. Being best friends with a couple would also make him feel like a third wheel a lot, so having a girlfriend and double dates seemed cool.

Then he got into a fight with Tommy and Carol after that graffiti episode in the movies and they drifted apart. Tommy wasn't mean about it, but he was resentful and hostile, because they were best friends and it always sucks to lose a friend to a boyfriend/girlfriend who you think cheated on them.

After a year, when he and Nancy broke up, he, Tommy and Carol didn't get back together, but they weren't hostile, you could tell they felt bad for him. Steve wanted to be friends with them again, he just didn't feel right crawling back with his tail between his legs and he also felt guilty that they never reconnected before. He didn't want it to seem like he only got back together because he was single.

He's still popular, but now his best friends aren't around anymore and he got cheated on by his girlfriend, but he feels like he deserved it (let's just say the story they made up about Barbara dying was real and the trauma grew into a monster and consumed their entire relationship). So he feels alone.

He has the kids. But Dustin thinks he's awesome and he doesn't want to be anything less, Lucas also sees him as a hero, willing to take a beating for him, Max looks up to him as a big brother. Will is Jonathan's brother and has traumas, so Steve would never dump his problems on the kid. Mike is Nancy's brother.

All of his real friends are kids.

So, Eddie. Steve isn't lonely around school, he still interacts with other students, he's friendly with the popular crowd, a lot of people like him. He just has these moments where he seems sad and then suddenly he seems super chill again.

Anyone who looks closely can tell he's got a problem and pretends not to, but it's not obvious. Eddie doesn't think much of it at first. He actually finds it amusing, because he has a lot of shallow and superficial ideas about popular kids who conform to the norm and who are well-off.

Eddie comes over when he sees Steve reading a DnD rulebook. He mocks it a bit, but explains a few things and Steve, who has always been a social butterfly and never cared much about sitting at the same table as some group in the cafeteria, sits down with Hellfire.

Not with the intention of being their friend, just because he wanted to ask them questions, take notes and move on with his life. A brief connection, a friendly interaction. No different from his relationship with most people who are part of his social circle.

But Eddie keeps pulling him closer, invites him to join the Hellfire Club. Steve declines, because he likes the stories and wanted to learn about DnD because of the kids, but he feels insecure about being a player, about roleplaying, he's afraid of making the wrong decisions and ruining something that seems to be so important to their friends (both the kids and Eddie).

Eventually, they fall in love.

Steve graduates without much distinction and Eddie barely makes it, but they are free from high school. While Eddie continues to play concerts at the Hideout with the CC boys, Steve works at Scoops Ahoy and makes friends with Robin.

So, when Eddie decides to leave, Steve asks them to wait a little, to save up more money, to get better organized. If they stayed for a whole year, Robin could even leave with them. When Eddie doesn't agree, he says they can continue their relationship long-distance. After all, it's 2010 and there's technology for that.

Eddie leaves anyway, believing that Steve will regret it and look for him, understand that leaving is the right choice and blah blah blah. Steve can't leave yet, because if he moves out, if he doesn't follow the path his parents have laid out, he'll give up any illusion of family he might have had. His car is in his father's name, he doesn't have much savings, he's still not open about being bisexual and he's terrified of leaving his entire life behind. It's hard in Hawkins, but facing the whole world, the uncertainty, not having a home to go back to… It scares him. Eddie doesn't understand, because if nothing else worked out for him, he could go back to Wayne and be welcomed with open arms.

One of Eddie's first hit songs is about a preppy, popular, charismatic kid who's the captain of the swim team and lives in Loch Nora who starts dating him in his senior year and gets stuck in a shitty job at the mall. It's easy to figure out who Steve is. People at school find out quickly.

I like to think Carol is the one who alerts him, goes to his job to tell him the rumors. Tommy goes with her. Although Carol is kinder and more open and Tommy keeps his distance, as if he might be infected, he also tells Steve to be careful, for old times' sake.

Either way, he becomes a target. The students tell their parents that they believe the hit song is about Steve. This story even gets around the church that his parents donate to and "attend" when they're around. His parents' friends find out. His business partners find out. His parents, too.

His parents suddenly move back home. It was a huge fight, with his mother accusing him of being possessed, suggesting a treatment to "cure" him. Mr. Harrington said it was due to a lack of beatings. Either way, it ended with him bleeding alone in the street.

A few days later, he and Robin managed to return to "steal" some of his belongings back, including documents. Other than that, he lost everything.

Mr. Wheeler didn't even want him to get close to Mike anymore.

For a while, he spends his days between the Hendersons' couch and Robin's bedroom floor, feeling like shit and listening to the music Eddie wrote over and over again.

After that, he sells his cell phone, his laptop, whatever he managed to keep. Robin also sells some of her things and the kids help with this small fundraising, selling cakes and sweets. Even Tommy and Carol seek them out, providing almost 50% of the money. That way, Steve is able to leave with a few months' rent saved.

Wayne also helped, because he knew that Eddie's music was responsible for this. Steve told him never to talk about everything that happened with Eddie, so Wayne kept it a secret.

I think Tommy, Carol and Steve could get back to being friends. Not the same as before, but they have lunch together every few months and they were the ones who helped Steve get a job in a new city.

A few months later, Corroded Coffin is well established, about to release its first album. Robin goes to college and Steve and she move in together.

That's when other people start to find out who Steve is too. It starts with a post on Reddit, people speculating about him, which is the central theme of several songs, although none are as explicit about his identity as the first. His parents receive some hate mail, they make a point of sending it to the Buckleys and Steve finds out. What hurts the most is knowing that his parents never gave him any of his belongings, but they found a way to let him know that people he didn't even know hated him.

He gets some hate messages too, because, although he deleted his old accounts, the new ones are easy to find through the profiles of people who knew him before all this. So, they're probably students from school, people know what Robin's social networks are, finding him.

There isn't much hate coming his way because he's careful to keep to the shadows, and thankfully the speculation about Steve Harrington being responsible for breaking Eddie Munson's heart doesn't go that far, after all, there's nothing to keep fueling those theories.

One of the things that connected Eddie to Steve was music. I like to think of Steve as a musician, like Joe Keery is. If Eddie can pour out his anger through music, he can also pour his heart into it. He writes Unknown/Nth and posts it to an anonymous YouTube account. He sings with an acoustic guitar, without showing his face.

For a while, this feels like closure.

Steve still gets hate mail sometimes, even though he deletes the old accounts and creates new ones. Everyone in Hawkins seems to know about him and Eddie. The kids, who hated Eddie for a while, have reluctantly started to admire him again. Steve reassured them about this, but they all remained bitter about everything that happened.

Steve, for his part, has vacillated between hating Eddie and hating himself. Most of the time, he still feels like he maybe loves Eddie a little bit, as if he’s stuck on that last day they saw each other. Sometimes he blames himself for making the wrong decision. Other times he thinks that if he hadn't stayed in Hawkins, Eddie might never have made it big.

His feelings for Eddie are complicated.

So, about 5 years after the breakup, there's a documentary about the beginning of Corroded Coffin. Something not produced by them. Maybe by a fan? Who goes to Hawkins, talks to people, tells them about Steve, exposes Steve and it goes viral on social media.

His life goes to shit very quickly. Eddie doesn't even notice at first, because CC is on a world tour and they never have free time. Meanwhile, Steve becomes well-known on social media and gets some hate mail.

Things change a bit when someone, seeing old photos of Steve, posts on Reddit that they have a crazy theory: there's a song they've been listening to for years, that's a lost gem in the depths of YouTube and they swear that's Steve Harrington, because the moles match and you can see a Hawkins High jacket in the background. It's a pretty crazy theory, so it doesn't get much attention, but the song gains momentum.

Eddie finds out because, once he learned everything that happened, he started researching everything about Steve, trying to measure how much he ruined his life.

Assuming people find out that the song is really about Eddie, I think he could become the target of hate, almost as much as Steve did, because Unknown/Nth is a powerful song.

That's what I've thought, for now. They get back together in the end because Eddie's actions had terrible consequences, but he never meant to hurt Steve like that and the biggest culprits for everything that happened are his parents. The hate from the fans wasn't that intense until the documentary, so it was hard to notice.

Anyway, they have a long way to go. A talk to clear up their last fight, a lengthy apology from Eddie, reconnecting with the kids, getting back to being friends.

It would be terribly sad and difficult. It definitely wouldn't be a fairy tale, but they could learn to trust each other. Eddie could earn Steve's trust, affection, and friendship, and one day they could be a couple again.

[maddy-k-reads-all-day]

Thinking about the "Do you Feel Safe Tape"

Honestly we should talk about the different reactions to 'who do you trust' a bit more.

Wooly - Wooly seems surprised that you trust him. I couldn't help but think it's partly because we like seem to like Amanda and Amanda hates him. Also considering Amanda doesn't trust him, he probably hasn't had anyone say they trusted him in a very long time and it was probably shocking. Then Amanda tells us she felt that way a long time ago and Wooly looks sad. I've noticed throughout the game that he seems to get sad whenever Amanda talks about not liking him anymore. He gets immediately sad when Amanda says that you have to think about who you can trust, before she even mentions. I think whatever he did to break her trust, he might actually feel really bad about it. (I can point out other moments he's done this too if you want). But what else is interesting is that Amanda trusted Wooly at some point. She didn't hate him from the start, something happened to change their relationship. I can't help but feel it was "recent" considering the events of the first game. Considering both Amanda and Wooly's reactions to Wooly coming back to life, I'd assume Amanda has never hated Wooly enough before to try killing him. When I say recent, I mean possibly during the years that Kate was watching the tapes and talking with Amanda.

Personally, I think both Amanda and Wooly unintentionally played a part in Kate's death and Hameln finding her. Considering Amanda's reactions to us saying "Hameln" I think they might still be monitoring Amanda and Wooly. I think that by interacting very directly with her (saying her name and stuff) could have helped them discover her identity and put her in danger. Which is not directly related to anything in this post (I mean it could be, but I'd need more evidence). That said, it's possible that him getting in the way of them remembering (once they started to gain back their memories) was exactly why she stopped trusting him. . But I think the important takeaway here is she did trust him at some point, and he feels bad that he broke that trust.

Kate: Amanda trusted Kate, and wishes she could still talk to her. Kate was one of the last people who knew Amanda when she was Rebecca. (well, positive relationships at least) Think about it. Sam is MIA. All the other librarians who knew her are DEAD. Any friends she had in school or whatever are definitely full grown adults if they didn't get trapped in the show (idk, like if they were watching it cuz it was their friends show or whatever). Every person we know who knew Amanda is probably dead now. Kate was the last one. Now that she remembers, she keeps saying she wishes she could still talk to Kate whenever we mention her, and Wooly looks like he feels bad. Now that she remembers who she was. Now that she remembers Rebecca, she wants to talk with Kate, maybe the way they used to. That could be why she's so angry with him. Why she tried to kill him AFTER they found Kate died (in the Wooly's birthday tape) but had only hurt him when they realized Riley was watching the tapes and not Kate (in the original in your neighborhood tape). Wooly might've caused her to miss her chance to talk to one of the few people who knew her as Rebecca. That was recent though, I think she lost trust in him over time as he kept blocking her attempts to reach out to Kate

Sam: She says Sam was trusting too, and that can be a mistake. She sounds so sad here, like she is going to cry. I think this confirms that Amanda doesn't hold any malice towards Sam about what happened. She understands that both of them were tricked. So idk, I guess any theories involving Amanda hating Sam for what happened are debunked now?

Hameln: Saying Hameln immediately makes Amanda stop trusting us. Wooly looks scared of Amanda yelling (as always) but I noticed he also looks kind of angry? Offended? Annoyed? I can't really tell cuz the tape gets really blurry. I've seen people say that Wooly doesn't react to the meatman or Hameln, but I think he does it's just more subtle. I don't know what else to say here, the clip goes by so fast.

Meatman: Again, both of them react to this. Amanda immediately gets pissed. And like, reasonably so. I've heard that the game won't let you progress past this point if you do this apparently, so like... the meatman is serious. Wooly looks shocked and then immediately motions at us not to say that. But like, it's a different surprise then when you answer "Wooly" he seems horrified. Like this is a pretty messed up thing to say. I'm not 100% sure what the meatman's deal is but like... both Amanda and Wooly seem to dislike him in the first and second game. Also is it just me or is it kind of odd that they only dislike the butcher? Like, there are variants of him in all the shops in the first game and Wooly and Amanda don't really seem to mind him, but they both don't like being in the butcher's. When only the meatman's buildings appear, Wooly looks pretty concerned, and then really scared when they enter, and asks her to take them someplace else. Amanda has a full-blown meltdown over not wanting to go in and when we enter she screams at us to let her out. I find this scene interesting because I don't think either of them are in control. Wooly is trying to distract her from Kate's death (or at least that's what I think the "something bad happened" means) by going a bit off-script and controlling the story a little. It doesn't seem like he was the one who messed with the stores. Amanda didn't either. What if this was the meatman? Like... punishing them for going off script by like reminding them of his looming presence or whatever? Idk. That whole scene was WEIRD in hindsight. Even though we never enter the butcher shop in the second game, his presence looms over us the entire time. Almost makes me think he's the real one put in their too keep the kids under control. They are both terrified of him after all and he seems to be connected with the surgeon who trapped them in there. Sorry this got a bit on topic but I think I might be getting somewhere.

But let's move on to the answers for the "what scares you" question.

"Amanda" or "you" - Question, has anyone tried Rebecca? I've only seen the answer compilations use "amanda" or "you". Amanda breaks our heart here by being hurt that after all this time we're still afraid of her. Ouch.

Hameln - Amanda gets terrified and says not to bring them up. I think Hameln is definitely watching these tapes.

Meatman - Wooly finally reacts to something, and bro is freaked out. Idk if it's by the mention of the meatman, Amanda's anger or both. Honestly, I have no idea why her anger spells still freak them out. I guess it is pretty scary, but I feel like he should be used to it at this point. Also she can't kill him, so what is he afraid of? He doesn't seem to be worried about being the one who makes her angry anymore, but he still gets freaked out when we do it? Weird. Anyway, I find it interesting that Amanda has spent the whole first game trying to tell us all about what happened, but she draws the line at the meatman and Hameln. Wooly wasn't there to stop her before, and she still didn't want to discuss it. Honestly, it doesn't feel like she's been as eager to tell us much in this game, despite trusting us. I mean she's told us plenty about Sam and Kate, so I don't think it's that she doesn't trust us. I think she doesn't want to remember things about Hameln or the meatman. She wanted to remember who she was, she wanted to remember Sam, she wanted to remember Kate and she wanted to know what happened to her... but somehow she draws the line here. Then we see the glitches of the surgery room and the mouth. I really do agree with the theories that the meatman is connected with the people who put her and Wooly into the show. That said... why is he there? That's what I don't get. I think I might be cooking with my earlier theory though no?

Wooly - Odd. He doesn't even look hurt, just confused. We can clearly see here that Amanda is not at all afraid of Wooly, so like I don't think he's like a Hameln worker. The meatman absolutely is though. We are not hating on the meatman enough guys. DOWN WITH THAT- Anyway.

Actually the whole point of this post was to talk about what Amanda says about how we were a stranger when we met her. I think this is really important to note. Because Amanda knew Kate long before she was Amanda. Possibly before "Amanda the Adventurer" even came to be. Of course Amanda trusted her. But she didn't know Riley. She tells us that she trusts us. This is HUGE. I mean, considering everything Amanda has been through. She barely knows us. She has EVERY DANG REASON not to trust us. Heck, I think that could be what Wooly means when he says she shouldn't talk to strangers. Because "not talking to strangers" doesn't make sense in this context. The viewer is a stranger, but if they didn't ever interact with the viewer they wouldn't have a show so Wooly's comment makes no sense. And yet, despite everything, she trusts us. Wooly looks kinda sad when she says she trusts us, probably because she trusted him once too, now she won't listen to a thing he says.

Then Joanne (I swear to god I got so mad at her in this scene) calls us and Amanda looks kind of sad when she hears that. Then looks really sad when Joanne says "that thing" I think Joanne was referring to the Wooly monster but Amanda doesn't know that. Then the possum appears and they both get really mad at it (and us for letting it mess with them). It's made very clear that both of them genuinely don't know who this guy is. It's funny because usually Amanda is the one asking us to get rid of him but this time it's Wooly.

And then let's talk about how COORDINATED THESE TWO WERE OMG. All it took was a look and a nod and they were already on the same page. If we don't help them, they manage to beat this guy up all on their own and mind you, not a single word is exchanged of a plan, they just work together. They just do it. And they do it so freaking well. Remember my Hameln theory? About how Hameln doesn't want these two on the same team because you know... two kids who can control demons who have every reason to hate Hameln and then there's THIS. When they get along they work so freaking well together. Could you imagine if they both decided to team up with their demons and beat the crap out of Hameln? Is there even a chance to be stood here? Honestly, I was also thinking, I think Hameln picked whoever Wooly is specifically for his avoidant personality, knowing that these two would clash. But clearly they don't have to.

Oh yeah, then they both get pissed AT US. I don't think we've actually seen Wooly get THIS mad at us. Like there was the time in the storybook tape but like he was not this mad. He's like... Amanda level mad here. Then they pick up the possum and throw him in the trash with still very minimal communication and ALL THE COORDINATION.

Then in the version where we do help, Amanda actually agrees with Wooly's sentiment that some strangers CAN be scary. Then without a word they both pick him up and throw him in the trash. BRO THE COORDINATION BETWEEN THESE TWO WHEN THEY WORK TOGETHER IS INSANE I NEED MORE OF IT ITS SO SMOOTH AND PLEASANT TO WATCH. Then Wooly asks if they can go home and Amanda playfully teases him "What are you scared?" Then he kinda makes this face like "yeah kinda" and she's like "c'mon let's go." she sounds a lot less annoyed with his presence then usual. Like still annoyed but also like she's kinda okay with it?

This deserves it's whole entire own post but like... I feel like gradually their relationship has improved over the course of this game. Like Amanda still doesn't trust him, there's still some rough stuff they need to work through, but she's starting to let him in again. Just a little. She's more okay with him being there. And I think people tend to overlook this when they say Wooly is evil. If Wooly was evil, why are they starting to get along again, (I mean they aren't besties again but like it's definitely a start and you can't ignore that.) Shouldn't Amanda continue to hate his guts? Instead she's actually agreed with him on some things, and they've helped each other out a bit. Like I said this is probably going to get it's own post at some point so I'll leave it here for now.

Holy crap did you actually read all this? OMG thanks. I did not realize I wrote so much WOW. BTW, I was watching those "all answers" videos along with a zero-commentary playthrough of the original so like, I'm not pulling this from memory at all.

[wemlygust]

it's kinda funny (as in, literally amusing, not as in "I am indicating sarcasm or criticism") that importing Danny Phantom into the DC Universe seems to free people to age him up or down all along the age scale. Here in crossover land, we've got baby Danny, we've got toddler Danny, we've got little kid and preteen Danny, we've got teen Danny, we've got adult Danny with a job or in college or both, and we've got immortal super old Danny. I don't think his age varies this much within Phantom-only/non-crossover fic? I wonder if this is true for crossovers generally, or if it's more true for Danny Phantom because a) he's in one way or another immortal and b) his physical form is already unusually changeable, at least as a ghost. And c) there is already canonical time travel. It's almost always Danny's age that changes, not the ages of the various Bats. Danny's age is adjusted by who the author wants to pair him with, or whether they want someone to take care of him or have him take care of someone else or both, or who they want to have be his long-lost twin, or whatever. For those long-lost twin fics, one could hypothetically, like, make Tim younger, instead of Danny older, but it's almost always the latter I think? Which is interesting. I guess if you make Tim younger, that changes his relationship with the other bats, and potentially the canon backstory you'd rather not try to re-jigger. It does make sense to just change the age of the 1 imported character to suit all the other characters whose ages already are interconnected and matter for their relationships with each other. I think I've only ever seen, like, one (1) fic where Danny was actually physically middle aged or over, and even for that one I'm not at all sure. I might be making it up. Alfred is the one (1) person who gets to be old AND look old, I guess. Normal "center the teens and 20 year olds, and maaaybe the 30 year olds on a good day, and everyone older is a side character or not even on the page anywhere, unless they are immortal in a way that makes them look forever young" problem common in fiction in general continues also in fanfiction, alas. You know what, I bet YA is still like that, too? In which case, no wonder there are so many younger folks who act like 30 is Ancient, Falling Apart, Basically Dead At That Point, Oh God Why Am I Not [XYZ arbitrary "success" or "adulthood" goal here]. Let alone 40.

[anxiousapplepie]

I think I have some ideas for some of the other Traveler's Mal Du Pays (unfortunately the only one I can't come up w/ one for is Isabeau). You can take 'em or leave 'em as you so choose, I just want to share the ideas I've come up with.

Okay, starting with Mirabelle, maybe their whole thing is the face changes to the other party members like how the change god statues all have different faces. Not sure if Traveler!Mira has the same kind of connection to the change belief, but it would be an interesting way to take it design wise. Maybe their look changes to any of the other Mirabelle getups too, and it changes in regard to the face they take on.

For Odile, I was thinking it could be 2 bodies for one entity - one takes on Odile's Ka Bue traits, the other her Vaugardian traits. Both are different in appearance to themselves and Odile, yet still part of the same whole and look enough like her to see the connection.

And for Bonnie... honestly I think it'd be an interesting move to make them resemble Pétronille (granted they still have an important link to Traveler!Bonnie). You could have them be your own unique design and nothing more, or they could be a revolving door of other Nille designs on top of your own in a sort of "you can't even remember what they looked like" kind of way or something.

*jotting down notes under the table* definitely gonna play with some of these ideas you've given me! If nothing else this is very good spaghetti you've thrown at the wall on my behalf and we'll see what sticks when I start thinking about the game-events for real! I WILL SAY THO. Traveler!Mirabelle used to be a housemaiden, but left the ranks (not the faith! she's still trying to practice the Change Faith) to figure things out on her own. So the idea her inner Sadness shifts and changes faces and shapes is SUPER cool and fascinating! Like, it's everything she thinks she should be. The vibes compel your honor!

[infinite--92]

At the science and development conference, Dr. Miranda Hale found herself in a rare position of being the center of attention. Her reputation in the medical community had grown, especially after the work she had done with Sophie, Emily, and their condition. The university had invited her to speak about the hormonal changes and experimental treatments that were still in the early stages, but with great potential. It was a topic that was both controversial and intriguing, drawing the interest of many in the academic world.

Miranda, though usually shy and reserved, had become more comfortable with public speaking over time. She stood at the podium, explaining the scientific principles behind her work with clarity and passion. Her hands were steady as she clicked through her slides, her voice confident, though a little quieter than some of the other speakers. As the lecture went on, she could sense the curiosity and intrigue from the audience, especially as she described the unique phenomenon that Sophie and Emily were experiencing.

The Q&A

When the lecture ended, Miranda sat down at the front of the room for the Q&A session. A few questions came from the audience, some technical, others more personal in nature, all of them eager to understand the potential implications of her work.

One student in particular—a young man in his early twenties, wearing glasses and a casual blazer—had been asking several follow-up questions. He seemed particularly focused on the details of the hormonal adjustments and the potential outcomes of the ongoing experiments. His questions were sharp and precise, showing that he had a genuine interest in the subject. His enthusiasm was almost contagious, and Miranda found herself engaged in the exchange, enjoying the intellectual challenge.

After a while, however, his questions took a more personal turn, hinting at an unusual curiosity about the human side of the research. He asked about how the women involved in the study felt about the changes, how they had coped with the rapid physical transformations, and whether any of them had formed a deeper connection to the process itself. Miranda answered carefully, always sticking to the scientific facts, but it was clear that this student was more interested in the personal implications of the research.

After the Conference

Once the conference had concluded, most of the attendees filed out of the lecture hall, eager to continue networking or head to the next session. Miranda was gathering her notes when she noticed the same male student from earlier approaching her.

"Dr. Hale," he said, his voice a bit more nervous now that the formalities of the Q&A were over, "I really appreciate your talk today. It was fascinating—so insightful."

Miranda offered a polite smile. "Thank you. I'm glad you found it interesting."

The student hesitated for a moment before continuing, his eyes searching for the right words. "I—uh, I just wanted to say... I find your work really inspiring. And, well..." He shifted uncomfortably on his feet, clearly gathering courage. "I think you're really attractive. And if you're open to it, I'd love to meet with you sometime. Maybe we could have coffee or dinner? Just to talk more, maybe—about your work, or anything else."

Miranda was momentarily taken aback. She had grown accustomed to intellectual admiration for her work, but this kind of personal compliment was new. She had been so focused on her research and the community she was building that the idea of romantic or personal attention from others had never really crossed her mind. She could tell from the student's expression that he was genuine, though perhaps a little too forward for her comfort.

Miranda smiled politely but firmly. "I appreciate the compliment, but I think it's important to maintain professional boundaries. I’m here to focus on my research and the work we’re doing, and I hope you understand that." Her tone was kind, but clear in its intention to redirect the conversation.

The student seemed slightly embarrassed but nodded quickly. "Of course, Dr. Hale. I understand. I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable."

"No, it's fine," Miranda reassured him, her voice softening. "It's just that I prefer to keep things professional, especially in academic settings. But I do appreciate your interest in my work."

The student gave a small nod, clearly trying to hide his disappointment. "Right, of course. Well, thank you again for the talk. It was really eye-opening."

Miranda smiled again. "You're welcome. I'm glad you found it valuable."

As the student turned to leave, Miranda took a deep breath. She was used to being respected for her intellect, but this encounter felt different. It was the first time in a long while that someone had expressed personal admiration for her outside of professional or academic contexts. While she appreciated the compliment, it made her realise that she wasn’t quite sure how to navigate this new territory. She had always been so focused on her work that personal matters like this hadn’t been on her radar. But perhaps, with the changes she was experiencing in her own life, it was time to reflect on how she might want to handle relationships, both personal and professional, moving forward.

As she packed up her things and prepared to leave, Miranda couldn’t help but think about the unexpected nature of this world she was now part of. It wasn’t just about science and development anymore—it was about navigating her own journey, both professionally and personally, and figuring out where her place was in it all.

[who-is-page]

Wag Those Tail Feathers: The Wonders of Alterhuman Courtship

Author: Page Type: Essay Words: 1,065 Summary: Page's perspective on alterhuman courtship, as an individual who has been both on the receiving and giving ends of it.

[Part of the Sol System’s Alterhuman Writing Project for 2024. If you don’t want to see these posts, block the tag #inkedclaws]

As a polyamorous alterhuman, I’ve had the wonderful experience of being in relationships with people who have a variety of different courtship instincts— sometimes even all at the same time! Including my own instincts, it’s led up to some interesting realizations about the variety and diversity of expressions of love, and how wonderful it can be to be loved by an alterhuman (and to be an alterhuman in love, too).

My personal experiences, notably, revolve specifically around being nonhuman and this applies to a majority of my partners as well, which influences the flavor of this discussion. It’s been a wonder to be the target of a feathery mating dance, to be wooed with draconic jewelry and treasures, or to have my partner jump out with a meal, as proud as could be at displaying their hunting skills for a mate. It’s not necessarily just a nonhuman thing, either, of course; my orthohuman partner exhibits some similar sort of feelings and actions, too! Something which comes across especially strong in his hunt-and-gather supply-hoarding behavior in video games. But there’s something so especially intimate about having your alterhuman partner court you in a way unique to their species identity. It’s a beyond flattering form of trust, love, and affection.

And as an alterhuman who has targeted my partners, alterhuman and orthohuman alike, with my own affections, it’s also uniquely affirming to have your partners engage with your varieties of courtship for your species. There’s something incredibly special to have them try to learn your rituals and woo you in turn, even if they don’t have the same instincts driving them. It’s love with intention, a conscious effort to learn a language that’s typically foreign to them or which they might otherwise never come across on such a personal level. It may not always be perfectly executed, but the intentions behind them make them perfect regardless.

I’m someone who’s fully public about my alterhumanity. I don’t hide that I’m a dog and (luckily) no one especially seems to care in the day-to-day when I’m meeting up with strangers and acquantinces. But it’s become an important part of my dating life that potential partners need to not only be aware of my alterhumanity and accept it, but they also need to interact with it. You could argue that my spouse set the bar high for any potential future partners with how he took to my canine-ness and plurality like a fish to water, but I’m of the opinion that it’s something that should be the norm, not something so utterly unexpected by many.

Being able to engage in alterhuman courtship with your partner, as serious or as silly as it may fundamentally end up being, shouldn’t be something that you feel is utterly unreachable, that you yearn for but never feel like you’ll be able to reach. Alterhuman courtship is a wonderous experience; something that I think it’s not only important for alterhuman folks to be able to freely do with those they love most, but also to be on the receiving end of, too. It can be easy to default to the status quo in relationships, because of the societal pressure around us. Normativity around romance, sex, and even platonic affections is something that is constantly at play in the backgrounds of our culture and which embeds itself into our conciousnesses in unexpected and often invisible ways; and it’s difficult to dissect these without exposing ourselves to what some might list as “weird” or “unusual” urges and behaviors. But we can’t unpack the shame or embarrassment that might be holding us back from engaging with these urges unless we actually let ourselves acknowledge the collective, confusing feelings abound within them. We shouldn’t allow ourselves to shrug our shoulders and simply say, “I suppose I’ll never find someone who can accept me as my [species] and all that entails,” or to just resign ourselves to having to hide a part of ourselves away forever to maintain relationships.

We should toss these types of negative feelings aside and embrace our alterhuman courtship urges in earnest: that sometimes we’re not fully human, or we’re human a little to the right, and that inevitably makes romance, sex, and platonic interactions a little different for us than it might look for standard folks as displayed on a big screen. It’s not a failure on our part, and it’s not something that needs to be squirreled away due to internalized respectability politics. We can love ourselves and find love in others, for and by being ourselves. We can experience unique forms of love and adore those factors in others. This is, to me, a part of the territory that comes with being alterhuman or knowing alterhumans. It’s a part of what makes life wonderous.

In my partnerships, I love getting to bring my partners gifts. I love to bring them tiny treasures, small things from my system’s hoard, to pebble at them almost like a penguin would (sometimes including a silly little dance, of love!) It goes beyond standard gift-giving in the way that most of the people I’ve met would think of it, where presents that large are often reserved for special occasions like holidays and birthday. But it’s something I do year-round, to show my partners that they’re always on my mind, and that what is mine is their’s, too. I do the same thing with food; while normally incredibly food protective, both due to species identity and past food insecurities, I make the effort to share my favorite foods with my partners for the same fundamental reasons. To share my food, my bed, my life— and to have my partners recognize that as not just general displays of love, but as specifically displays of love intertwined with what I am, is something which displays a deep level of understanding and acceptance for my species. It’s something I’m grateful for beyond words, but it’s also something that I don’t want us as a community to accept as unheard of, or as just a one-off, lucky occurrence. Love like this is achievable and rewarding, both as a recipient of such alterhuman affections and as the giver. And we all deserve to experience it, in whatever form of love that we feel most comfortable with. Don’t tell yourself otherwise; don’t settle for less just because you feel like you have no other choice.