#but i suddenly get to work from home so maybe i will axtually have time to make art

[xrusos]

So uh I'm very into arcane... might be making another side blog for that if anyone is interested

[yearnandsorrow]

Game and metaphor concept

“Something strange has occurred, a door has suddenly appeared in your bedroom. It creaks softly, and a peculiar radiance floats behind it. The air in the room tastes like nothing you’ve tasted ever before.”

There is a creaking door, in a normal bedroom. Each day you go out and do normal things, but at home this door exists. The door is a secret. Behind this creaking door trickles a light of glory, to taste it is pure delight. Sometimes the light is effulgent and wild, radiant and incredible, sometimes the light is calmer and dimmer. But the door does not open.

You do not know what is behind the door. But you intuitively understand one thing: to open this door is to take a phenomenal risk. The effects are entirely unpredictable, and you’re certain than you’re not the only one at risk. And yet..

You have to do mundane tasks, including take your “Alchymi” medicine.

at some point, it occurs to you that you might be able to open the door. This option appears early, at first attempting to delivers a message like “you won’t even contemplate doing that - you intuitively understand that doing so will make the door shut forever. And leave you without it’s light.”

Whenever you try to open it, receive a statement from a list of reasons. Like “you know this is unwise, you won’t do it” “you know that to open this may hurt the light on the other side. To open this, you may hurt another. You can’t stomach that.”

“If you open this door, other doors may also close forever.”

“If you open this door, you will bask in light unimaginable..”

“it simply is not reasonable to open this door. It is selfish. It is reckless. It is foolish.” You feel a fool for even thinking of doing so

Bring in words about how one needs to actually endeavor. Will you give in to abandon and try to grasp the sun?

Contemplating it creates worries eventually that someday the door will close forever, is there only a small window to open this?

as time goes on, the door creaks wider.

At a point, axtually opening the door becomes possible. if you do so, the game basically ends. It does not tell you what happens because the nature of this relies on its unknown. It will tell you that what you have done is brave, and reckless. You have dove into a point of no return, and what awaits you cannot be guessed. You are told that you may regret doing this, but at least now, you know. You’ve made a Choice.

Actually opening the door needs a certain level of yearning with a certain amount of it being open.

Perhaps there needs to be a second option for a cautious retiring - you will decide that you will never open the door. Perhaps it will open for you, perhaps there are other pursuits.

You can bask in the doors light, increasing a Yearning quality alongside a Flushed (which never goes above 50%). Yearning mostly affects your dreams. Flushed can make you wake up, and maybe there also a tertiary happiness you can feel.

Every day you get a little blurb on how the day went. Use this to establish independence - you have your own days and good ones without the door.

Maybe have the game have a sort of “morning” period where you click on events that pop up which throw storylets at you. So it’s sort of like cultist simulator, which you can just basically copy honestly. Maybe make it real time limited (and you have to uh. Click and hold or just click and wait while it fills). If real time you don’t need to code a loss of time value, but if fixed time you’ll need to.

ACTIONS

Basking , mundane actions, daily stuff(see above)

when you are experiencing and struggling with thoughts of the door, give yourself some choices about mentally approaching it, such as “allow yourself this emotion” “I am helpless to resist this.” “You know that no matter what, it will be ok for you.” “You will be content with what is here” “you remember to See yourself.” “You will allow yourself catharsis (does not always work)” “you will allow yourself distraction (always works)”

When clicking on the door event, you can contemplate the door/ bask in it / open it. If you contemplate it, have the game series a number of current states to deliver to the player. If there is a repeat state, it will preface so “it’s the same thought as last time.” And then print the text. If it’s a repeat that isn’t immediate, it will instead preface “it’s a familiar thought.”

Pray- there are old saints here. The half-born moth. The hunger engine. The sweet-rot bed. You consider seeking their advice.

Yearning- yearning is a value that can fill like a bar but it has other traits too - like color. Perhaps represent it like a flower. On a vine, sometimes represented differently based on a hidden value (so a type of redness might be erotic.) (the longer the yearning plant is, the more segments you have for giving the player sub elements.)

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DREAMS:

 Each night, create a dream for the player to read

“The door is open. You can hardly allow yourself this fantasy in waking hours, but now it is here, and beautiful. you step slowly towards it. With a cautious motion, shaking with anticipation, your hand slips through the barrier.. [it is warm on your skin, exciting and soothing all at the same time. The hand fills with goose bumps or something]. Smiling, you take the best step, and-“

“there is something wrong with you, deeply wrong. Everyone can see it. You cannot escape from it. You cannot-“

“You are escaping hostile pursuers, and when you duck into a room you suddenly are facing a mirror. You are so beautiful, you are so beautiful that-“

“you are a tree, in an empty field. In front of you, the door, glowing wonderfully. Your branches swell under light, it is drawing such ripe fruits from you you can hardly believe-“

“A number of multicolored birds fly out of the door, flitting about. You think strangely, that you wish you were like one of them. You reach out to touch one and-“

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MOODS

- with that light, you almost feel that you could burn your house down and smile.

- you a pulled by strings from within the light so strongly that it alarms you.

- you feel helpless against it, but at the same time, more powerful than ever.

——— terms ——

Yearning: the sweetest hunger. to starve with sugar upon the tongue.

Low yearning: you imagine that you do not need this light.

———

Snippets:

“you didn’t choose this, you didn’t choose this, you didn’t choose this.

God, you’re helpless against it.”

“You are embarrassed to want to open the door so badly, you are ashamed to want to.”

“You accept this continuum, you will enjoy this for what it is, while it is. It’s ownership of you fades - but still you think of your vulnerability, should it open for you again.”

“(Rough, just trying to lay down some important beats) you open the door, good things happen. Mention that things may not be what you expect, there a hundred different ways for this to go and some might involve situations too difficult for you to handle.”

I hope this game makes me people remember that they are allowed to make choices in their life - even big ones.