#but i rlly wonder what it would be like for astarion to visit them years and years down the line and see how these people

[tamajam]

iiii like to hc that someday in the future when tav dies and astarion doesn't because he's immortal that he goes down into the underdark and finally makes amends with all of the spawn he brought to cazador all those centuries ago. where he can see that all of the work he did, that impossible choice of giving up ascension to be better, that it all paid off in the end because the spawn have built themselves a civilization that's thriving and happy. that he can sit down next to sebastian and properly, truly apologize. sebastian has no obligation to forgive him, certainly, but there's an understanding between them of the position astarion was in at the time and the fact that, no matter how horrible what he did was, he did not have a choice. and id hope by that point that maybe astarion would have healed enough as a person to understand that and not hate himself forever for his part in ruining these people's lives, but also i feel like he'd be just as likely to take a place there beside them for a time just to feel like he's making up for just a sliver of it. idk i really want a fic where astarion and sebastian just talk post-game, because their interaction in game shattered my heart