#but i really do love arizona it’s nice to be here again even though the heat is terrible

[gayestcowboy]

i’m in arizona right now and damn that global really can warming!

[luveline]

I would love to do a request if you would like! Some sort of Spencer Reid x Reader where the reader is super bad ass, tough, doesn’t show much emotion is kind of cold to others but has the biggest soft spot for Spencer!! 🫶🏻

thanks for your request lovey, I would love to write more of this pairing if you have any more requests ♡ fem!reader

"Here comes the ice queen," Morgan mutters, turning his chair away from the walkway. 

You walk down the steps from Hotch's office. Whether you were praised or reprimanded is anybody's guess —your face never gives anything away. Spencer doesn't necessarily agree with the way Morgan's categorised you, but he isn't wrong either. You're like Hotch in temperament, if Hotch were soft on only Spencer. 

That might have something to do with why Spencer won't call you cold. You're never cold with him. 

"What did boss man want?" Morgan asks. 

"If it were your business, Morgan, I'm sure you'd already know." You don't say it spitefully, but it's far from a warm answer.

Spencer honestly asks just to piss Morgan off, "Everything okay?" 

You visibly soften. Walking past Morgan without notice, you pause by Spencer's desk, your voice quieter, gentler. "Don't worry, Spence, everything's fine. You still reading that book about sex crimes in Arizona?" 

"I finished it. Doesn't take long." 

"No, you're fast," you agree. "What are you gonna read next?" 

It's amazing how swiftly you shift gears. Your body language totally changes, your shoulders slouching toward him, your hand open and resting on the back of his chair as if you might touch his hair. Morgan shoots Reid a look that says, What is happening right now?

"I was thinking about reading up on the Milk Killer, from 1954. He tried to give his victims blood transfusions high in lactose in an attempt to cure intolerance." 

Even Spencer admits that that sounds boring, but your face lights up with genuine interest. "That could be good. You'll have to tell me how it goes." 

"Sure." Spencer squints at you. "You have something on your face." 

"Yeah?" you ask, and Morgan goes wild behind you, dipping back in his chair in disbelief at your breathless tone. "What is it? Can you get it for me?" 

You bend a little and Spencer wipes the lint from your face sweetly. He wonders if he should be blushing, your affection for him as clear as it is, but for once, Spencer Reid feels smug. He can melt someone that Morgan can't. "All gone," he says. Smugness aside, you're a friend (and maybe a little more than that).

"Thanks, Spence," you say, popping a kiss against his cheek. "You saved me from embarrassing myself." 

Morgan clears his throat. You barely move, your hands twisting behind your back. "Hey, lovergirl," he says, making himself heard. 

"What, Morgan?" you ask, finally looking away from Spencer's pinking cheeks. 

"You have something," he says, pointing at the corner of his mouth. 

"So?" you ask indifferently. You turn back to Spencer as though nothing occurred. "Do you want to go to the movies again this weekend? They're playing a silent film. I think you'll like it." 

Spencer smiles genuinely. It's not his main concern, but it's definitely an added bonus to hear Morgan's sighed, "Are you kidding?" as he nods vehemently. 

"I'd love to," Spencer says. 

"Okay. It's a date," you say, smiling at him so nicely it feels like he can't breathe. 

"What's a date?" Emily asks as she returns from the kitchenette, eyebrows jumping. 

"It's a marker used to denote the day or month within a year," you say primly. "I have to go make copies for Hotch." 

You don't say goodbye. Morgan likes you, really, in the same way you like Morgan, so he gives Spencer a dazed look followed by a small smile. "Good luck with that." 

Spencer looks over his shoulder to follow your figure as you carry a box of reports to the photocopier. "I don't think I need luck," he murmurs. You glare at the copier, clicking one of its buttons aggressively. "She's nicer than you guys think." 

"Sure."

[autisticlancemcclain]

Lance opens his eyes to white nothingness.

It takes him a moment to adjust, for the sight in front of him to focus into a plaster popcorn ceiling rather than a block of bright white. He blinks rapidly, clearing the bleariness, steadying himself on the steady couch cushions in the castle common room.

He stills.

The castle?

He glances back up at the ceiling, but it’s as smooth as it’s always been; dozens of feet above him. No bright plaster, no textured popcorn ceiling. He squeezes his eyes shut, wondering what he’ll see when he opens them again, wondering where he even really is.

But when he opens them again, it’s still the castle. He’s still in space.

“Did you fall asleep?”

He drops his gaze from the ceiling, landing on Keith, who’s looking at him in fond amusement.

“No,” Lance says, because he doesn’t remember losing consciousness.

“Yes you did,” Keith responds, grinning. “Loser.”

Lance rolls his eyes and tries to kick him, but Keith grabs his foot easily, tugging it towards him. Lance gets the hint, lifting his feet and placing them in Keith’s lap as he reclines back into the couch cushions. Keith rests his hands on Lance’s ankles, tugging up the hem of his pants to brush his fingers on cool skin. Lance matches his breathing with the steady movements.

“You can go back to sleep,” Keith murmurs. “I don’t mind.”

Lance almost protests. It’s lovely to be sitting with him. He’s cute when he’s soft, when he’s not worried about what they’re doing next, when he lets his guard down. Lance only wishes things were less slow, less lethargic, so his eyes weren’t so heavy.

.

.

.

The rain starts to come down harder, faster, and it gets harder and harder to see. Lance squints, trying to see through the sleet of rain. It’s hard; he can barely see the shadows in front of him even though it can’t be past noon. The wind is icy, blowing at the soaked fabric of his orange uniform coat. Strangely he’s not cold. He’s hot, actually, suffocating in a blanket of heat, even as the rain pelts his skin, drops down his nose.

“Taylor! Come on!”

A boy appears in front of him. Lance startles — it’s so hard to see in the storm that it’s like he’s popped out of thin air. The boy’s long black hair is plastered to his head, and he’s soaked to the bone. He reaches out and wraps a glove-covered hand around Lance’s wrist, pulling gently.

“Come on, it’s freezing, you’re going to get sick. Let’s go, Taylor.”

Taylor?

Lance’s sneakers are soaked through, and usually that would bother him. But for some reason he can’t bring himself to move, to walk away. He hasn’t felt the rain on his skin in two years.

That doesn’t make sense. It’s the middle of the rain season in the Arizona desert. All students are forbidden from going outside. He’s not supposed to be here. This boy isn’t, either, this boy who calls him Taylor.

Lance followed this boy. Didn’t he? That’s why he’s out here in the first place, against Garrison orders. He always gets in trouble for following this boy into trouble.

His shoes are heavy with water, but slowly he picks up his feet, crossing his ankles. He smiles slightly and lets himself twist, holding his open palms out to the sky, closing his eyes and tilting his head back. A raindrop hits his cheek and slides down to his lips. It tastes of salt.

“You’re ridiculous! It’s a storm, Taylor! We need to get back before we get caught! Or hurt!”

Lance looks over at the boy. His indigo eyes are narrowed, clouded over with frustrated, strong brow furrowed to protect his eyes from the water.

He looks troubled. He’s too young to be this trouble. They both are.

Lance shifts their hands, so they’re entwined, and pulls the boy forward. He stumbles, but doesn’t fall.

“What are you doing?”

Lance smiles, grabbing his other hand, and twirls him around to imaginary music. For a minute the boy stubbornly resists, then a small smile cracks his face, and he relents.

“You’re crazy,” he says.

Lance just smiles. It’s kind of nice to be rained on with this boy, whoever he is.

.

.

.

.

A hard bump in the road smacks Lance’s head to the window, dragging him awake.

“Fuck,” Keith curses. “Sorry, Bluebell. Go back to sleep, we’re still a little ways away.”

Lance yawns, shaking his head. “No, I wanna stay awake. Don’t want to lose any time with you.”

It’s clearly the right thing to say. Keith smiles, wide, showing the crooked incisors Lance loves so much. He reaches over and grasps Lance’s hand in one of his, bringing it up to his lips and pressing a kiss to one of the knuckles. Stubble tickles the back of his hand.

“Me either.”

Neither of them speaks after that. Keith’s broken car radio lets out a burst of static every couple of minutes, but it’s drowned out by the sound of rain pelting the windshield. Keith hums slightly as he drives, tapping a finger on the steering wheel. It feels familiar, almost, like the start of a movie Lance has seen a thousand times. He supposes he has, with how often they’ve made this drive.

The drive takes another hour, but it feels so short. Too soon they’re driving past the farm fields, turning onto a long gravel driveway, stopping in front of a brick house with blue paint peeling from the door.

Keith parks the car, pulling off his seatbelt and shifting to face Lance. His smile is kind of melancholy. He cups his hands around Lance’s face, and the leather of his gloves feels too soft, almost blurry, somehow, corporeal. He leans in and kisses Lance gently, reverently, sadly.

“Tell your family I said hi,” he murmurs, pulling away slightly.

“You could come in for a while,” Lance offers. He doesn’t want to leave. He doesn’t want Keith to leave.

But Keith is already shaking his head. “You gotta go, Lance.”

His words are muffled. Far away. Lance isn’t sure that’s even what he said.

Lance blinks and then he’s slamming the car door, running to the porch with his jacket hiked over his head. He turns back when he reaches the front door, but Keith is already gone.

.

.

.

.

.

Lance wakes to sunlight warming his bare skin. His sheets are smooth on his legs, resting on his thighs and belly, barely really covering him. Most of the sheets are tangled around toned, pale legs, knobby knees. Lance follows them all the way up to a wide chest, covered in scars, and a well-defined jaw, thick black hair streaked with grey. A man stares at him, bleary-eyed, smile making his crow’s feet more defined. A long purple scar stretches across his cheek. Lance realises he’s leaning on the man’s chest, fingertips tracing shapes on his rough skin.

“How long’ve you been ‘wake, sweetheart?” the man mumbles, slight Texan accent bleeding into his words.

Lance shrugs. Truly, he has no idea.

The man says nothing more, only pressing a kiss to Lance’s hair before leaning back into the pillows, holding him tightly. Lance takes the time to look around the unfamiliar bedroom, trying to find out where he is. There are pictures everywhere; the man, Lance, Lance and the man, Lance and the man and a group of other smiling faces. Lance recognises none of them. There’s a large vanity table by the window, surface covered in various bottles and lotions, obviously not the man’s. It’s all as familiar as it is foreign.

The man runs calloused fingers over Lance’s ribs, slowly, and he shivers. No one has ever touched him like that before; intimately, quietly, adoringly. Touching for the sake of touch, like there’s nowhere he’d rather be than in Lance’s space.

He’s cute. He makes Lance feel safe.

Lance should probably find out his name.

But the man traces what’s clearly a heart on Lance’s sternum, and Lance is so comfortable. He feels like all his worries are a step away. Something’s wrong, he knows it is, but it’s lovely to sit between this comfort and chaos.

He doesn’t want to ruin the moment.

.

.

.

.

.

.

This time there’s no rain. He’s not asleep beforehand. He simply comes to awareness in the car, hand clutched in Keith’s, static playing gently through the radio. They’re driving to Lance’s family’s house again, and the sense of deja vu is stronger this time, the sense of wrongness. It slips out of him, the feeling.

“Something’s not right,” Lance says quietly.

Keith snorts. “Yeah, no kidding. You could just move in with me, you know. Then we wouldn’t have to do this every couple of weeks.”

That’s not it. It’s not — separation. That’s not what Lance meant. He opens his mouth to say so, but as he does, he feels something hook around the inside of his ribcage, yanking him backwards, out the car, out of his body, out of the space. He hovers above, watching himself settle back into the passenger side, clutching Keith’s hand. Neither of them say anything for the entire drive.

Lance watches as his body presses Keith against the door when they park, kissing him soundly, laughing about something, then standing to get out. There’s no rain this time, so he lingers, leaning against the car door and sticking his head through the open window. He says something. Keith laughs, then leans over and kisses Lance again, gently, softly, hand sliding through his hair. Lance feels that, far away, from where he’s floating above them, the phantom hands in his hair.

As his body walks back to his family’s house, turning back and waving at least six times, Lance realises that it’s not real. None of it. Not the car, not the kiss, not Keith. None of it is. He presses his fingertips to his lips and they slide right through, like he’s made of air. He can’t remember the last time he was kissed. He can’t remember anything. The realisation is familiar, like the end of something, like watching the last scene of a movie and realising as the credits roll that he’s seen it before.

The familiar wrongness of it all bubbles up in him. Suddenly he wants to scream as loud as he can, but he finds he doesn’t have vocal chords to do it. Or a mouth.

Slowly, the world around him blinks in and out, the colours fade, the shapes and shadows disappear. All that’s left is a bright, endless white.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Lance opens his eyes to white nothingness.

[zilabee]

- The first time I watched Get Back (which is the only other time I've watched Get Back) this was the day where I realised how much a mish mash mess the entire editing of it was, because obviously I know the tapes of day eight much better than the tapes of other days. (on account of it being the day where Paul and John use George as nothing but an excuse to talk about their own broken up feelings and confused affections.)

- Wonderfully, @inspiteallthedanger and @get-back-homeward posted about the cuts and snips in the lunchroom tapes, and how frustrating and impossible it all is, here. So I don't have to kill myself trying to explain how WEIRD the resulting 'conversation' Peter Jackson came up with is. What a strange strange thing he did.

- I'm aware that the art of documentary is cutting bits out, and I know they couldn't put it all in. But I do find it tiring. Even not lunchtime, but all the conversations, all the days. I just want to know what they look like at the appropriate points without having to double guess and think and disregard. We're not allowed that though, until some kind soul steals the full footage and gifts us pure wonder, so unless you can really see their lips move, it's only a mirage.

- But! the full 20 seconds that is given over to watching Paul looking sad where nobody says anything at all is the best 20 seconds Peter Jackson ever spent.

- Paul explaining that obstacles aren't obstacles if you refuse to acknowledge any sadness in your life think about obstacles. I mean he's not untrue, it's not not true, he could make a motivational poster.

- So proud of his terrible news bulletins idea. I actually do think ending a massive spectacular show by having a quiet man come on and quietly announce that you've broken up could be nice though. But really I'm just in love with the fact that instead of worrying about breaking up, Paul has been turning it into a project they can all work on together. (And thinking about how to make it suitably big and show-off break up, because it's the Beatles - I love that he worries about their legacy. George and John are so weighted down by legacy, and Paul's just like 'it's only hard if we don't live up to it, so we should just live up to it'. He's such a lot, but he's true.)

Linda: But you were saying yesterday, you know... you make good music together whether you like it or not. John: I like it. Linda: And making good music is also... John: But it's just... Linda: It's really hard working in a relationship. John: I know.

- I love that they call it feeling guilty about each other.

- I love that when John is talking about how hard it is when Paul won't give in on arrangements, he specifically says that he wants it to work more like it works when they're writing. It soothes me in its easy acknowledgement that the writing is good. (even while he's destroying it I know)

- Paul jokingly saying 'You stay out of this, Yoko' to Linda when she is joining in the conversation is probably one of the first times that joke was made, where it's now a recognisable joke to almost every english speaking person in the world.

- SHUT UP I CANNOT STAND IT. (Literally no idea at what point of the thing I wrote this down but I stand by it.)

- I hope they didn't tell George they only wanted him back as a matter of policy. <333333333

When we're very old we'll all agree with each other and we'll all sing together.

- I love him talking about how it all works better if they sing properly instead of just singing half. I love that they just need to be young again and they're not young, since Brian died they haven't been at all young.

- Love John wanting someone to fact check Paul in case Tucson wasn't actually in Arizona. His surrealism does not stretch to inaccurate geography.

Ringo: The meeting was fine. A lot of good things, but then you know... they all sort of fell apart in the end.

Ringo accidentally writing a perfect little synopsis of the Beatles.

- "I don't feel like the Beatles revolve around the four people. It might be a fucking job." John trying to invent The Plastic Beatles. Or make it a bit like national service for rockstars. Everyone dreading the fucking letter that means they have to leave their families and their homes and their happy bands to go and live in a cauldron with Paul and John for a few months.

MLH: I think at some point we should talk conceptually about the show. Everyone prepares to leave.

[flowersandbirdsflyingfree]

MY FINGERS SLIPPED AGAIN SO I’M POSTING THE ASK FROM @shinmiyovvi I’M SO SORRY😭😭😭

Fair. Now can you move along, C-3PO? I’ve got stuff to do.

6. Be honest, what was your first impression of s/i when you first met them?

Shit. I could barely bring myself to do much of anything first time we crossed paths. I was stuck in a shithole town that I moved to for a new job. Aaaand I got fired my first day, thus signaling that judgement day came early. The people here are a real piece of work. Everyone’s aggressive for no reason other than being an asshole for free.

Anyways, as I resided in the asscrack of Paradise, Arizona, I remember seeing Maddie in the middle of my errands. Something about her seemed so out of place to what I was used to. Like a fallen angel lost in hell. I’m surprised she even helped me hide from the cops after the Lucky Ganesh shootout.

Normally, I wouldn’t. But something told me to. There was just something about you that felt familiar.

You too, huh? Well, dearie, that right there is the stuff of soulmates.

8. What’s your favorite thing to do with s/i?

*shrugs* Just about anything.

Awww! Gosh, my favorite part of every day is being able to spend time with you!

Me too, babe. If I really had to choose though, even with the big events to the small errands we run together, I’m just happy to hold you close in my arms like this. You’ve tamed me to be a real cuddlebug.

15. What’s something about s/i that surprised you when you first started to get to know them more?

Say, this is a fun question! I guess if anything, seeing how much common ground we shared is a start. Yep. Deep down, the Postal Dude shares a lot of humble values and she’s on the same page for the most part. She’s just more way patient than me and has a different approach to things.

There’s also her taste in music. Maddie’s got me into Volbeat now. I wouldn’t have thought she liked heavy metal or a lot of older bands most people her age wouldn’t know!

I mean, grunge and nu-metal’s making a comeback! *whispers* Ugh, even if that includes Limp Bizkit…

Hey! You talking shit on Limp Bizkit?

NO!

*snickers* Gotcha. Limp Bizkit sucks.

18. Have you ever met any of s/i’s friends or family yet? If so, thoughts on them? Are they nice?

Yeeaah… About that…

Well, I met you first and you’re actually pretty chill. Same with Julia despite her f/o’s looking skittish around me. But that’s how everybody else sees me to be honest. All I have is Maddie and my dog Champ. Maybe Uncle Dave. I’m an antisocial sociopath which adds to my misfortune in the whole social interaction department. Hey, at least Maddie still puts up with it for now, right? *teasingly jabs shoulder*

Don’t say that! I love you very much!❤️

I love you lots toooooo😚❤️

He’s getting cheeky again😅

[skittlesmcgee]

Today I made my wax lady cry. Not tear up. Full on cry. I didn't mean it and it was a good thing.

For the last eight months, this very nice lady, about my age, has been carefully taking the hair off my underarms and snatch every eight weeks. Today, she asked if I had seen her emails. I told her that I didn't think I got emails from here, just text messages. So told me that she's closing her business. She explained that there were some things she needed done but the landlord just wasn't doing them. She's looked around for other locations and just can't find anything in her price range. So she was thinking about closing the spa. Then her son explained that he was moving from Arizona to Dallas and she should come down to Dallas. She could live with him until she figured stuff out. And that's what she's doing. My response, "I am so happy for you! I am so glad you are doing what's right for you!"

First, I think a lot of her clients' first response is "Who's gonna do my <insert thing here>??" And I get it. I don't want to find another wax lady. (For the record, I already have an appointment scheduled. LOL) But this lady is starting over in a new city and she told me she was a little nervous about it. So I told her my story. I told her how I did exactly this two years ago. How it was the hardest, scariest, best thing I ever did. We spent the whole time that she's doing her thing talking about it. How she's never lived anywhere else (same). How she really hasn't traveled that much (same). How, even though she has her son, she's moving to a brand new place without an established support structure (same...not my son but my friends).

She talked about how she only really figured out the first step...move to Dallas. She hadn't figured anything else out. I told her that I had used that same move on my last two vacations. I had a short list of things that I wanted to see, but had plenty of time to find cool stuff along the way. You only need those one or two stops. The universe will show you the rest.

After I got dressed and went out to the lobby, she was sitting at her desk looking a little teary. She told me that she only has the first step figured out. I straight up told her, "You only need to figure out that first step. You've already tackled the biggest hurdle. You decided. Now you're gonna take the step. And if you aren't ready for the next one right away, it's okay. If it takes three hours or three days or three years before you're ready for the next step, it's okay. The universe or God or whatever, will sit with you while you figure it out." She was absolutely in tears. Then I said, "Imma hug you and I don't care what else happens today." And I held that woman while she sobbed. I told her I was proud of her and that I loved her.

When they say, "One day you will tell your story of how you overcame what you went through and it will become someone else's survival guide", they aren't necessarily talking about writing a book. They are talking about telling your story to the people you encounter in your life. Share your tale, because you aren't just an abstraction, a nameless faceless author that can be written off as heroic or epic. You are a person in their sphere. A real live, walking, talking human...in my case, a pair of underarms and a snatch. I'm going think about that lady for a long time. I'm gonna send good thoughts and vibes her direction as she starts live in a whole new place.

I made my wax lady cry today. I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

[forestwhisper3]

Tagged by @joyfuladorable but I don't know how to link their post. Sorry.

Share your wallpaper:

Laptop lock screen

Home screen

Phone lock screen

Just a turtle emblem on a black background

Phone home screen

As you can see, turtles are still in my brain rent-free.

Last song you listened to: Not counting the instrumental stuff I put on to help me write? YT music says it was Yasashi Kiss by Hitomi Shimatani, but before that, it was Adoro by the Broncos, The Guiding Key by Liz Robinett, Passing Through by Kadan Mackay, Feel it Still by Portugal. The Man, and a remixed version of I Love You Baby by Gloria Gaynor. I also listen to a lot of electro swring and stuff with a good bass beat, as well as jazz and classical.

Currently reading: nothing specific at the moment, just different fanfics, haha. My sister really wants me to start reading one of her favorite series, but I can't ever seem to dredge up the willpower to do it.

Last movie you watched: The whole way through? The Mario movie. I've seen bits and pieces of others since then whenever my mom's watching one, but not the whole thing.

I'm not counting the Rise movie since that's just a permanently open tab on my laptop now.

Craving: Frozen yogurt. Or a bacon avocado cheeseburger. Or steamed buns. Or all of them. It's been a while since I've had them, and I want some.

What are you wearing right now: Stitch pajamas when I started this, but work clothes right now since I'm at work.

How tall are you: 5'3"

Piercings: I guess my ears? Pretty sure one or both of them have closed over by now, though.

Tattoos: None. At most, I've done those fake paper ones that used to come with packs of gum, but nothing permanent. Don't really plan to, either.

Glasses? Contacts?: Both. Since middle school. Used to hate glasses, but now I love them. Only thing I don't like is the poor vision that comes with it, haha. Contacts are for work or trips to places like theme parks where I'm afraid they'll fall off on a ride or something.

Last drink: Water. If we're talking alcoholic...I don't even remember. I'm not a big drinker.

Last thing I ate: Pizza for dinner. And breakfast since I was too lazy to make anything.

I don't even know what toppings were on these but they were delicious.

Last show: TMNT, specifically, "The Real World" from the 03 series. I need my reference video.

Favorite Color: Red and purple. Green is nice too.

Current obsession: I think it's pretty obvious, lol. TMNT.

Unrelated obsession: ... I'm not sure what to put here. Fluffy things? Cute things like penguin stickers? ...Pokémon?

Any pets: 4 cats, 2 dogs, all rescues. We are very much a "You're coming home with me" family.

Crush on anyone?: No one that's real, lol, and my fictional "crushes" are said more as a joke more than anything. Am I opposed to the idea of romance and being in a relationship? Not at all, but I'm not gonna go out of my way to find one or stress out about it either. If it happens, it happens, and if not, that's cool too.

Favorite fictional characters: Now these I have a lot of. Yusuke Urameshi, Yagami Taichi, Gary Oak, Roronoa Zoro (although I love all the strawhats really), Michelangelo (though again, I love pretty much all the ninja turtles), Knuckles, Tails, Professor Layton, Donald Duck, Sora, Cloud Strife, Vincent Valentine, Zack Fair, Maes Hughes (and most of the FMAB cast), Luigi, and many more. These are just some of the first ones that come to mind, but it would take too long if I did all of them, lol.

Last place you traveled to: ...What is this traveling you speak of?

Joking aside, probably Tucson, Arizona, to visit my brother. Not counting that? Mexico, but that was ages ago.

Tagging...uh...*checks to see who actually interacts with me on here* @klonoadreams and @eldritchgray I guess?

[sunny6677]

Spooky Month: The Dating Sim

Part 32

(I'm mainly just doing this because it's fun to watch, but this is basically a spooky month interactive thing/poll which is kinda like a dating sim. Of course, only the adult characters can be your love interests. So do take that in mind.)

————

You decided to introduce yourself, though you said your name rather nervously. You really did wonder how you had met so many people within a few days of being here.. and why things were moving weirdly fast.

Jaune blinked, her peculiar lips curled into a straight line for a moment before they slowly turned up into a smile. "Oh, well, it's nice to meet you! I'm Jaune. I'm friends with Lila."

Calmly, you stated that you were babysitting Skid for Lila. You quickly added that it was nice meeting her. Jaune only chimed back, "Its nice meeting you too!"

You then paused. You had to get back home. Not for any peculiar reason. But the weight of the heat was making it hard to bear standing there any longer, and the Arizona sun made you feel like you were in a land filled with cactus and sand. The grass was even beginning to look dry with how warm it was outside, and it was quickly turning to a dry color.

You let out a sigh, and quickly stated that while you wanted to talk to them both some more, it was probably best if you got back home. The sun was kind of killing you after all. Lila's gaze wavered for a moment, "Oh, okay! Well, thank you again! I hope we can talk some more later."

With a smile on your face, you said to Lila that it was no problem. You turned around, and began to head toward your vehicle that was parked along the gray driveway. You swiftly waved your hand around, bidding a farewell to the Lavender-haired woman with a voice that sounded like the sweetness of honey.

In reply, you simply heard her say, "Bye!". You began to hear Skid and Pump beam in unison, "See you later!".

You opened the door to your vehicle, slowly beginning to slip into the driver's seat. You heard Lila and Jaune conversing, though it sounded muffled as soon as you tightly shut the car door. Slowly moving the vehicle out of the driveway, you quickly turned and began to drive in the direction of your home.

————

By now, you had been home for maybe like 2 hours. Your skin finally felt normal again, and the air conditioning inside of your house made you feel calmer. You were sat upon your couch, your phone sat beside you as the TV made noises of conversational ambience.

You hadn't much to do ever since you had stopped babysitting Skid for the day. You admitted to yourself that it was actually pretty fun, and that you didn't mind the thought of taking care of him again. Especially if it was for Lila.

Though now you found yourself with boredom, making your brain feel dry as you watched the TV screen mindlessly like a zombie. Behind the ambience of the TV, you heard the sound of the air conditioning blowing. No scent remained in the air, and all you saw outside were the occasional vehicles swerving by the nearby road.

What were you to do to get rid of your boredom? After all, there were still plenty of people you had met so far. And you could easily call them up if you wanted to. But people like Radford and Kevin were probably busy with work right now. And Lila was probably busy taking care of her son than anything else.

You sighed.

[matan4il]

I don't know if you watch Grey's Anatomy but in this week's episode (19x15), there's a kid who is a patient just when he was supposed to have his bar mitzvah, and so the doctors organize for him to be able to do it at the hospital. And he does it with his grandfather who hadn't been able to have one in Germany. It was really a nice scene :)

Awwww, Nonnie! Thank you for telling me! That sounds so sweet. I used to watch Grey's Anatomy, but i kind of had to stop. I loved Callie's storyline with Erica Hahn. I know, seems unpopular. She started out as a not-very-nice surgeon, but I liked it when they brought her back and allowed her to be more human. I liked that she became a multi-faceted character. And then when they were started to throw out hints about her and Callie? When they were doing the build up for them? Don't get me wrong, it was still NOT in the ballpark of hetero slow burns, I guess you could call it a 'mid burn', though it was still better than what most mlm couples get (with maybe the exception of Black Sails and Our Flag Means Death, at least of what I've seen). I was the eyes emoji. And then the show actually followed through, it ACTUALLY let them get together and kiss with the music swelling? :o I was in awe, I loved it, I was SO there for it. They even explored what it means for Erica to figure out she's gay later in life versus Callie exploring her bisexuality (I didn't always love how they went about Callie's bisexuality, but I did like that they let them each have her own discovery story).

And then they just... got rid of Erica? And in almost no time replaced her with Arizona? And it was so clear they were intent on telling a wlw story, which was awesome, but when the audience didn't react well enough to Erica, they just... got rid of her and brought in a younger, "softer" version of her, as if queer characters are that easily replaceable. I was offended. I LIKED having an older queer woman's story being told. And I get Erica didn't start out nice, but by the time her and Callie got together, I did like her. So it was hard for me to warm up to Arizona. And even when I kind of reluctantly accepted her, because hey, it's better than no queer rep for wlw, I ended up not liking a lot of what they did with Callie and Arizona. Like the way Callie gets pregnant. They had a ridiculous fight between her and Arizona, just so Callie wouldn't be technically cheating when she sleeps with Mark and gets pregnant, and then Arizona comes back and magically, all the stuff that drove her and Callie apart is not there anymore, and Arizona accepts the baby with relative ease, but it just became yet another storyline that doesn't show how MOST same sex parents ACTUALLY become parents. So IDK when exactly, but at some point around that time, I quit GA rather than quietly rage about how bad the wlw rep was IMO.

I want you just to understand what it means that you managed to make me wanna watch an ep of GA again! IDK, but I will. Thank you so much for telling me about that and just in case you're curious? There are actually a lot of real life stories like that! Holocaust survivors who get to make up for the bar and bat mitzvahs they were robbed off. Here's an example, there's a program that brings survivors annually to the Western Wall in Jerusalem to have their bar/bat mitzvah there! I find it very moving, because THEY are so clearly moved by what they get to do.

Have a great day, lovely! As always, my ask tag. xoxox

[simpsonsnight]

Episode #710

The Wayz We Were Season 33, Episode 4 | October 17, 2021

Man, I really hated this one. The Simpsons becoming bland was a terrible blow for the unhealthily-obsessed-with-cartoons among us. But for better or worse, The Simpsons was ahead of its time with its initial blandness. Television, by and large, has become even blander than the blandest episode of the Simpsons, even, so they now feel actually contemporary, weirdly enough. 

This one is about a Waze-like app causing the family grief by routing too many cars through Evergreen Terrace. It quickly segues into a story about Moe crossing paths with Maya, and falling in love all over again. This time he proposes to her. It sorta reminds me of when the show took another bitter loser, Comic Book Guy, and married him off.

This ends with Moe asking her to marry him and her saying yes. I’ve focused on Moe as a way to criticize the show’s fall from grace. At the start he was mean and sleazy. Jokes in the classic era ironically showed him having a soft side. That characterization wound up sticking. Mr. Burns had a similar change, going from actually-evil to doddering and oblivious. Modern mainstream comedy programs are so queasy about depicting anything other than blue sky bullshit that all the changes to make the show more toothless are now actually welcome by the modern media landscape. It makes me ill just thinking about it. 

This one is full of overly wacky and pointless gags, and a corny James Taylor needledrop. They bring back Maya, a little person that I legitimately feel uneasy about. I made a half-joking post about the previous Maya episode, suggesting that Maya can easily or subliminally be seen as a minor, and that the show was attempting to groom children. Thank goodness nobody reads this blog, because I was truly just goofing around, and wasn't sincerely trying to give weird right-wingers ammo. It was just incredibly weird how that same episode features a baby wearing what could be perceived as S&M gear domming Homer, and a photo of two children scrubbing an elderly woman’s feet, which ties directly into the story about Matt Groening getting his feet washed by a teenage girl on Jeffrey Epstein’s plane. I haven’t concluded that Matt was aware of the implications of what he was doing, and I think the show’s sicko-mode was unintentional. But I still think it would have been a good idea to rethink this.

But most importantly: episode sucks. The only good thing was Ruth Powers scolding Marge for not visiting her in years even though they live next door. Bad season canon would remind you that she, in fact, moved out of that house at some point, because Sideshow Bob moved into it. I think at the end of that a relative of Ned Flanders moved in. Well, I guess she’s back. I’m just going to put this out there: I would watch the shit out of a spin-off of just Ruth and Laura Powers, maybe they move to Arizona or something. An Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore sorta thing. Yeah. That’d be nice. As long as they didn’t make it lame and retarded. Sorry for saying retarded.

[squeakyfir]

I'm your huckleberry (Tombstone 1993) (Doc Holliday)

Description:

The joys of modern inventions and miracles are often taken for granted. Your hungry or thirsty? Get something from the fridge or make it. You need to go somewhere? Drive or call an uber. Your hurt? Go to the doctor.

Your bored? Watch a movie, play video games, watch videos on the internet, talk to people without ever leaving your house.

Some much time is in our hands... but back in the 19th century... you wouldn't last very long.

Diseases are rampant, gun violence is higher, no modern technology, barely any good medicine, almost all of your favorite food doesn't exist and most of the people are rude as hell. But... That doesn't mean all of them were so bad. Love was not something most people in this time really cared about. At least, in the town of Tombstone, Arizona.

After falling asleep with a nice looking stone you bought at a small stand at the carnival, your whole world becomes the opposite. Six people from the past discover you unconscious and alone in the blistering heat and offer help but it was their help that let you meet the most amazing man you've ever met.

John Henry "Doc" Holliday.

Chapter 20

Previous ~ Next

For so long, you didn't know what to do with your life and just went along with a lot of things without putting too much thought into the little things. But after years of being in the past and having so much happen was a real life expierence that flipped your whole world upside down. But now, you felt so empty inside. After the Vendetta ride ended, Doc wanted to settle down with you and continue his poker playing and drinking, much to the disapproval of you. Docs tuberculosis was getting worse and worse as time went on, to the point that he had to get treatment. After fifty-seven days of Doc staying in the Glenwood Springs Sanatorium, you could feel death was close by. You and Wyatt were once again entering inside to see Doc.

You had a dark feeling that this may be the last time you'll ever see him. Wyatt could feel your nervous energy and gave you a reassuring look. Even though you've became a very tough woman and lost some of your innocence, he still held onto his promise. The promise that he, Doc and his brothers made years ago. Protecting you at all costs. That promise definitely had something to do with you still keeping some innocence. As you and Wyatt walked down the short hallway, the last bed had Doc laying there, looking lifeless with a priest standing beside the bed, praying for him.

As you both approached the bed, the priest gave you both a sad look and shook his head. It was time. Both you and Wyatt sat down which got Doc's attention and he opened his eyes. "Hello, Wyatt. Darlin'. Father Feeney and I were just investigating the mysteries of the church of Rome. It appears my hypocrisy knows no bounds".

"You're no hypocrite, Doc" Wyatt replied. "You just like to sound like one. I brought you somethin'". Wyatt was carrying a small book and slipped it underneath his hands for him. "Well, let's see" Wyatt said as he then opened a drawer in a dresser that was next to the bed. "Where are we today? I'm $17 down to you. Two bits a hand, stud"? Wyatt then pulled out a small deck of cards. "You both keep comin' back here. I told you both not to, and I meant it" Doc said.

"You and (y/n) are the only people I can afford to lose anymore" Wyatt replied which made you and Doc look to him. "How we feelin' today, Doc"? You then felt Docs hand gently grasp your hand.

"I'm dyin'. How are you"?

"Pretty much the same".

"How are you, darlin'" Doc asked you. You didn't want to think about the fact that Doc was indeed dying but there was no way to avoid it. "Sad" you said quietly but loud enough for him and Wyatt to hear. "So now we add self pity to our list of frailties-"

"Alright, Doc" Wyatt said quickly. "Alright, how many cards do you want"?

"I don't want to play anymore" Doc replied a bit sadly. Wyatt looked saddened by that but still asked, "How many" and placed some cards in Doc's hands. "Damn you" Doc said. "You're the most fallible, stubborn, self-deluded, bull headed man I've ever met in my life".

"I call" Wyatt said amd checked Doc's cards after showing his hand and said that Doc won. "Yet with all, you and (y/n) are the only people in my entire life who ever gave me hope". You and Wyatt felt surprised by this but for the both of you, it was also sad. "I thought I was in love once. My first cousin. She was 15. We were both so".

"That's good, Doc" Wyatt said. "That's good but you still have (y/n)".

"What happened" you asked.

"She joined a convent over the affair. I thought she was all I wanted, but I have you, darlin'". Doc very weakly tried to reach for your hand but you gave it to him so he wouldn't have to reach. "Wyatt, what did you want"?

"Just to live a normal life".

"There's no normal life, Wyatt. There's just life. Now get on with it".

"Don't know how".

"Sure you do. Say goodbye to me. Go grab that spirited actress and make her your own. Take that beauty and run, and don't look back. Live every second. Live right up to the hilt. Live, Wyatt. Live for me". You were having tears forming in your eyes and stray tear fell from Doc's eye. "Darlin'"?

"Yes"?

"Stay beside me. I want to spend my final seconds with you".

"Of course".

"Wyatt? If you were ever my friend, if you ever had even the slightest feelin' for me, leave now. Leave now, please"? Wyatt didn't want to leave his best friends behind but knew that Doc was right. Sadly, Wyatt stood up slowly but you released Doc's hand to grab Wyatt's shoulder. "Wyatt"? Wyatt looked to you and awaited to what you had to say but you quickly enveloped him in a strong hug, to which he didn't hesitate to return. "Remember what I said you and me are" you asked while crying.

"How could I forget? You and me... besties forever". When you both let go, Wyatt gently wiped your tears away and said this powerful message. "I lived through many dangerous things and met many strange people, but you (y/n)... your the best, strange and dangerous thing I've ever met. If we ever meet again, my promise will still live on for you". You smiled at him and he couldn't help but caress your cheek so delicately which was a nice action. You sat down beside Doc and you both looked to Wyatt. "Thanks for always bein' there, you two".

You both nodded and then Wyatt left you two alone. "Darlin'"?

"Yes"?

"I thought about your offer. Seein' the future".

"And"?

"I wish I could've seen it but I have the best thing the future could provide. You". Hearing that made you smile and you placed your hand on his arm. Doc smiled to you and finally said the statement you've been longing to hear from him. "I love you, darlin'". That statement blew your heart up in happiness and with tears in your eyes, you replied with, "I love you too! I always will"! Doc still smiled and without hesitation you leaned down and shared a tender kiss with your soulmate and you could tell he enjoyed every second of it. The kiss ended too soon but that was only because life was slipping away from Doc. Doc took a moment to look at his feet and said quietly, "I'll be damned. This is funny". It was then that Doc went still and a final breath was released from his lips and his body went cold. "Doc? DOC!? DOC"!!!!

You rested your head on his now cold arm and sobbed helplessly but something felt odd. It was as if you were floating and time stood still. As you continued sobbing, the hardness of the wooden seat was replaced with a soft and warm surface and Doc's arm was replaced with a pillow. Time had advanced. You were no longer in the 1880's... you are back in 2021.

[calloustotender]

i’ve realized very quickly—maybe too quickly, all things considered—that arizona feels something like a second home to me. i feel as comfortable here as i feel in nashville and i don’t know exactly what’s the cause, but i’m grateful for it. there are so few places in the world where i feel like i can exist comfortably, with my guard down.

the boys and i all agreed to take a break before flying to paris for the start of eras. zac and kayla went to new york. taylor and claudia to the smokey mountains, brian and his husband to…los angeles, i’m pretty sure. i was going to stay in nashville. i was so close to just spending time with jasmine and making sure everything at fruits and gdy were taken care of before being gone for an entire summer. i was gonna stay here, i swear.

but brian said to me: “your heart’s not in nashville, hayles.”

and i couldn’t really argue with that, could i?

so…i followed it to arizona.

we had a date to get done anyway, right? if i needed the excuse, it was that. but it turns out i didn’t need one, because he missed me like i missed him. his mama picked me up from the airport because he’s not clear to drive yet and that was…nerve wracking all by itself. jenny is lovely, but she sees right through me and i don’t think i like being seen that way. we caught up, little things. i could tell she was fighting a smile the entire time, though. you know the kinda smile from someone when they had a suspicion and they’re finally face to face with the reality that their suspicion was right?

yeah, that. it was that.

she knows.

oh, she knows.

but still, our date wasn’t real. we agreed it would be a pretend date. he’s still healing—his stitches are bothering him, his pain comes and goes, he’s still tired easily. my brain is still catching up to our current reality. none of this feels real to me yet and we’ve briefly talked about it. so…we agreed: pretend date for now. real date…soon. he said he knows we’ve been on dates before, but he wants the next one to be different. so we went out for lunch and we took the dogs to the park and he made sure i saw some palm trees and it was nice. it was comfortable. we still make each other laugh. the chemistry is still, somehow, there. maybe a little stronger? i’m nervous around him. i can’t look at him for too long without feeling like my heart is going to fucking obliterate my sternum. he held my hand on the walk and his fingers shook.

it’s still there.

but i’m staying at a hotel because we’re trying to take it slow. we know each other like the back of our hands, but we want to do this right. there’s a lot we have to work through, there’s a lot that i’m uneasy about. so…we’re giving each other space, and i’m thankful for it. i miss him when i leave, but i think the excitement of having to wait to see each other helps.

i’m sitting in his yard now, while he naps. i have a plate of raspberries and alf and murphy are playing in the grass. it’s warm and it smells like it’s gonna rain. i’ll probably go inside in a little to see what he wants for dinner…and i know his mama will probably stop by with something before he and i even have the chance to decide. and then—we’ll sit outside again, maybe with a guitar.

and it’ll be nice.

it’ll be peaceful.

[n4rut0runn3r]

Graphghan

Start date: January 5, 2023 

Completion date: September 17, 2023 

Pattern Creation

This is the pattern I created for the blanket. The style of crochet used is called a graphghan. This means that every single-crochet yarn stitch is equivalent to a pixel of an image. This also means row by row, I changed colors frequently. Layering colors to create an image. This pattern was drawn in a pixel art app, so each pixel could be accurately counted and planned for. My goal was an Arizona landscape that in saw in person. See below.

This is a pre-existing pattern online for purchase. I saw the reviews and thought that this would be the perfect place to start. However, this was not the Arizona that I experienced and loved. I knew that there were some changes that I needed to make, which led me to creating my own pattern! I did like the neutral color shades used in this pattern and decided to keep that in my version. See below.

I knew that the shape of the mountains in the pattern had to change. And luckily, I had the perfect reference picture. I loved the ”stegosaurus mountain” that is in East Mesa, a foot hill of the Superstition. It is a beautiful area that I am so thankful I got to visit and spend time there.

Here is how I recreated the mountain shape in my pattern. I took a few artistic liberties with the supporting shapes, because I wanted to be able to accurately convey the shadows and mountain curvature with a limited color palette. The mountain background of the pattern is one of my biggest achievements so far in my time crocheting. I have had this specific hobby for a few years, but I have never ventured far from preexisting patterns or YouTube tutorials. My pattern, and the blanket, are not perfect by any means, but I did learn a lot and I did grow my skills tremendously. I wish I could do it over again to perfect it, but I can only move on to more projects with new skills.

Time For Numbers!

This blanket is 240 stitches wide, and 300 rows in length. The pattern I created originally called for 345 rows, but I ran out of blue yarn, and decided that it was long enough. 

20 single crochet yarn stitches uses 3.5 feet of yarn. Using this as an estimate, 4,200 yards of yarn was used in the creation of this blanket. That’s why it's so heavy! 

In terms of yarn, I used Red Heart Super Saver brand, which is a level 4 yarn thickness. I prefer to use this brand because it is machine washable, but it does have some downsides. Unfortunately, due to its cheap production, the thickness is not exact. Meaning, I could buy 3 skeins of yarn, all the same color, thickness, even dye lot number, but the thickness of the yarn will vary slightly. This is seen on the blanket where the blue yarn starts. 

In this picture, I had just tied off all the loose ends and washed the blanket. But the top was still wider than the bottom due to the thickness of the blue yarn. So, I tried to weigh it down and stretch it out. It did not really help, so the blanket just ended up being more of a trapezoid shape. Thankfully, the blanket is almost as wide as it is long, so when sitting on the couch, it is not noticeable. It's not very fun to try to nicely fold though! 

My crochet speed is fairly good. But due to the many times I had to change colors, It took an average of 25 minutes to complete a row of crochet. This adds up to 125 hours spent crocheting. Boy Howdy!

I did a rough calculation of how much time it would take me to complete the blanket before I started, which is why I thought I would have it done in time for my April trip to Arizona, but I forgot to calculate how crazy life is, and the fact that I can't sit and crochet for days at a time. It's an unfortunate truth to life. I was able to get one “in progress” picture. This was on June 14, I was celebrating being done with the many color changes per row.

I was unable to get a final picture of it washed and being used, as it was a gift, and I was able to get it done in time for another trip and gifted it while on that trip. I put a lot of amazing skills in my wheel house, and clocked in a lot of practice time.

[rainbowskittle]

14, 30, 49, 76

14: If you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? Maybe Ireland? I don’t know Irish but it’s such beautiful country with nature, architecture so pretty and the food looks good too. The people seem nice too at least from movies haha never met an Irish person. So maybe there? Or even where I’m at now I like where I just moved too. Mountains one way and beach the other way. (All though prefer mountains 99.9% of the time.) .. Or if have to choose a state hmm maybe Oregon since it look pretty there too with so much nature.

30: Whats your favorite candle scent? I get headaches a lot with candles so don’t smell a lot. Like the floral ones or the very strong ones so don’t really smell them. Yet I do love cinnamon ones. Since reminds me of fall and even baking I love to smell the cinnamon.

49: What was the last compliment you received? I haven’t gotten any recently and even the last one I got I don’t remember? Maybe nice glasses? Haha I totally can’t think of one.. here I’ll say ‘coming soon’ .. *SpongeBob time cards play* so much later nothing was found.

76: What color looks best on you? Not sure haha I mostly wear blue, green, or black leggings/black jeans. I have one flannel that’s super soft, funny enough it’s called boyfriend fit (from brand Arizona) and I can’t find anymore that soft anywhere. Yet it’s purple and black. So I like that one so maybe that one? Or yeah the blue and greens I have. Those are the most common colors I have in my closet.

Thanks again K! You awesome 🤩.

[ofbreakingbones]

Their history was one that was hard to deny. Callie knows she wasn't perfect. But at the time, she felt with all that history and the past from Arizona and herself, with their relationship, they needed time to heal. They needed time to really see themselves again, because Callie knew she had lost who she was. She had lost the person she loved and didn't like the person she had become. She knew she could have done it differently, knowing she had hurt Arizona sleeping with her that night and just walking out. That wasn't Callie. But then, that is who she was and she regrets how she did it.

They both have lost themselves. They both did things they wouldn't do. Callie didn't think she could forgive Arizona, because she has always been cheated on. But seeing Arizona really start working on herself, it helped in a way to see past that, and know she wasn't herself. They both weren't themselves. So she couldn't really hold it against her, it was more just growing and being apart. That is when Callie really jumped at the first shot to go to New York and work there. No one knew her, or her past, and that meant that she could just get to work and no gossip. That is something Callie realized Seattle was famous for. New York, it was nice. Something Callie needed as well.

Callie felt a shift in them. Even though Arizona just got there, the love Callie had for her didn't just fade, no matter how long they have been apart. A new city for the two of them and also, a new look into life, and Callie didn't have Arizona in her life for a while now and she didn't want that again. but she knows if they are going to try this again, down the road they have to keep in mind that Sofia is older and she understands a lot more. She understands that they can't afford to do what they did the first time around, which is why Callie didn't push it, she just wanted Arizona to feel things out being she had hurt her more then she will ever admit. But the park day with Sofia, the one who is their middle ground was nice so far, and the way they both kept stealing glances at one another, she knew Arizona was thinking the same thing.

The park was something that Sofia wanted to take Arizona to. It was refreshing and it was just nice. Busy but it wasn't bad. Callie just walked beside Arizona and Sofia, letting the two of them take all of that in together and allow one another to just be there with the other. Smiling at the way Sofia was super excited to have Arizona there. As Callie stood next to Arizona, she couldn't help but glance at her and then she moved her gaze and shook her head. "Don't thank me. This is something Sofia wanted us to have. All of us and one of us bring her when the other can't. I wanted her to show you this. It is relaxing and one of her favorite places I have discovered. Just having you here, it made it that much more better for her. I am glad you are here too."

Callie's signature smile was spread across her face. "For the record, it is great to have you here. I have missed you."

Continued storyline with @ofblondehealer

The move to New York was sudden for Callie, but she felt it would have been better for the two of them. Callie just felt at a loss lately back in Seattle which is why she left and which is why she was no longer in the mood for fighting with Arizona. She loved the blonde too much to not make a difference in where they were going with their life. Sofia deserved to be happy and see both of her mothers to be happy. But when Arizona said she was moving, Callie didn’t think it was going to happen so soon, but she was just glad they could make it work. Being with her yesterday, it felt like old times and maybe that was Callie getting ahead of herself.

Maybe Callie jumped too quick. She knows their relationship wasn’t perfect and that there could have been things done differently but she didn’t expect Arizona to have a reaction like she did last night. Maybe it was too soon and just feeling as if things were what they were supposed to be yesterday, but Arizona made it clear she didn’t want that yet and that meant Callie just had to respect that. They had a daughter who was getting older and understood a lot more and that meant she couldn’t rush things and make things worst then they were when they were in Seattle. 

Walking away and getting ready, she just needed distance from Arizona and to just make sure this is what she was feeling and not just being around the blonde again, Maybe hat is why she said what she did last night, but something inside of Callie was telling her no. It was Arizona that she wanted and nothing else. She was back and they were all walking together Callie standing back and watching the way Sofia and Arizona were so in sync with one another and Callie just missed seeing them together. Knowing Sofia was good at secrets and Callie wasn’t going to say anything Sofia was just happy both were there and she got to show Arizona everything she loved when she lived there the first time. 

“I guess you’ll just have to pretend you love surprises because I was sworn to secrecy on what she wants to do today. I just have to give her directions.” Callie forced a smile on her face and as the elevator doors opened, Callie went in first as Arizona said and Sofia pressing the button to go down and get down to the lobby, once the doors open, Sofia pulled Arizona out first and Callie followed before moving to the other side of Sofia and walking beside the both of them. Walking out into the cool weather of New York and she looks around before looking down at Sofia and motioning with her head just where she has to go. 

“If you’re ready, Sofia is ready to get the first stop underway. She will lead the way and I will help her navigate but she knows these streets since we walk everywhere.” Callie was putting the awkwardness behind her and just making another day that Sofia loves when it comes to being with the two of them. That is all Callie wanted as well.

[nnightskiess]

𝐫𝐞𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐥𝐞𝐝

₊° 𝐭𝐞𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐚𝐥𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐞𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐛𝐚𝐠𝐝𝐚𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞, 𝐬𝐡𝐞'𝐬 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭. 𝐬𝐨 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 (𝐲/𝐧), 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐲 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐦 𝐢𝐧 𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐬. 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐝. 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐠𝐢𝐜, 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐟𝐮𝐥...

𝐬𝐞𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐢𝐱

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for my great friend lux @redhairedwolfwitch ♡ thank you for everything.

"Hey, you paged us?"

Cristina tilted her head, curious, while you stood behind her, wondering if you were in trouble if the Chief needed you.

"I know you're both most interested in cardio, so..." He motioned the two of you two follow him until your pager went off.

"Shit," You mumbled under your breath, staying slightly behind as you heard Cristina gush about the cardiac trauma Hunt showed her, "I gotta run, Robbins needs me, a complication in the NICU."

"Come on?! Cardiac trauma!" Cristina turned to you, the look on her face saying enough. But you had already started to walk away, putting a spanner in the works of the plan the universe had in store for you.

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"Doctor Bailey!" You rushed after her, wanting to catch up with her and show her the results of the CT she needed, until Cristina appeared out of nowhere, seeming frustrated.

"The new attending doesn't even know how to put in a temporary pacemaker!"

They came to a halt at the nurse's station as you hovered next to Cristina, waiting your turn.

You tilted your head, "Wait- we have a new attending?"

"Did you or did you not ask this man for a new cardio attending?"

"Yes."

"And did he or did he not bring in attending after attending, none of them who seem to please you and all of whom you ran off?" Bailey gave Cristina a look, one that made you have to bite your lip so you wouldn't laugh. Doctor Bailey had her cornered, and rightly so.

"That is not a fair assessment." Cristina bluntly replied.

"Doctor Yang, has it ever occurred to you that you might be the problem? Right, leave this man alone. Go torture the new attending. (Y/S/N), you got the results?"

You passed the results over, leaving as soon as Bailey waved you off, so you could go on your way to pester Cristina.

"So... why is the new cardio attending not to your liking this time?" Cristina rolled her eyes and groaned as she heard the teasing in your voice. You followed her, ignoring the annoyed look on her face, "Let me guess... weird hairdo that keeps distracting you? Bad breath? Silly walk? Or are they just not at your level?" You air quoted, making Cristina stop to stare at you before she continued her walk, but you knew she would talk after that.

"She might have been it once, but oh no, not anymore. She made me put in a temporary transvenous pacemaker because she hadn't done it in ages."

You grimace, having to admit how bad it sounded that a cardio attending didn't know how to., "At least she admitted it?"

Your comment went completely over Cristina's head, who was still fed up with the situation, "She's inexperienced, inadequate and is definitely not a cardio goddess. She's a desert storm barbie, who hasn't seen the inside of an OR in like 10 years. Owen was wrong to bring her here."

"Well... you've used up your three wishes and Webber and Bailey are done with your complaints... so I think you're gonna be stuck with her."

Cristina let her head fall back and let out the biggest groan before turning into another hallway, leaving you to shake your head as you walked to the lifts.

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"So, what do you think of the new cardio attending? Excited to learn from her?" Arizona draped her stethoscope around her neck, following you out of the room.

"I can't say, haven't met her yet... but Cristina seems to be really happy with her."

Arizona raised an eyebrow before she saw the look on your face.

"Oh, yeah, I heard. Wait-" Arizona looked at her pager, "Hm... speaking of the devil, Yang paged me. Walk with me?" She squeezed your arm, hoping you'd follow her.

You briefly caught up with your friend as you walked through the hospital. Jackson and Cristina were standing around a hospital bed, but before the two of you could approach, Arizona's pager went off once more,

"Hm... can you inform the parents of one of our preemie babies of his vitals? They're going home and would like to hear everything's still alright before they leave. Check his vitals with them in the room or they're not going to want to leave. They're persistent, but they're good parents. " Arizona gave you a soft smile as you nodded and grinned, doing as she told, not seeing the other blonde approaching Arizona behind you as you walked away.

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You were leaning against the wall, waiting for Arizona to finish up since she was your ride home, when a happy Cristina all but skidded out of the resident's lounge.

"You're being weird. What's gotten you so happy?" You noted as Cristina's frown from that morning had turned into a wide grin.

"Guess who did a Takeuchi repair today?"

"You did not!?" You gasped and stood up straight, your full attention now on Cristina.

"Uh, not all by myself. But she did let me do the coronary artery anastomosis."

You raised your eyebrows, still surprised. Cristina was a great resident, but that was a big shot surgery, even for her. "Damn, are you taking back your words about her now?"

"Yeah, probably. Which means-" She turned serious again, pointing a finger at you, "The games have begun." She let out another ecstatic laugh before walking off, letting you know you would have to step up and fight to get hours on cardio with the new attending.

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You walked into the lifts the next morning, the coffee Arizona had gotten you in one hand, the charts of the nightshift in the other. You only had five minutes to read them all and then inform your attending of the day of any changes. But with the coffee in your system, you knew you could do this.

You skimmed the first few pages of one of the charts as other people hurried into the lift right as the doors closed. A few floors later, you knew it was your turn to step out when the doors opened. Not wanting to waste any time, you kept your head low to read the charts, but you had to look up and stop when someone crossed your path- quite literally.

A woman hurried by, apologising to people left and right as she rushed through them. Though she had been fast, you had not failed to catch a glimpse of the face that you once so adored.

Teddy Altman.

She hadn't seen you, probably because your nose had been buried in the charts, or because she had been in a rush. You watched her disappear through the double doors towards the OR's and that's when it clicked. Teddy, your old friend from back in New York, the same Teddy that was in love with cardio, was the new cardio attending Cristina suddenly seemed to be gushing about.

You ditched your coffee somewhere, your body suddenly being filled with nerves and stress. It had been years seen you'd seen her. Ever since your mutual friend Allison had passed away on that damned day, you had lost contact with Teddy. Almost as if she had disappeared. Just like that. No note, no phone call, no goodbye. Maybe it had been for the best. The abrupt ending to your friendship had helped you get rid of the wish that it would ever become something more. Teddy was gone, and so were the feelings you had secretly been harbouring inside. But seeing her now... It overwhelmed you how only a glimpse of her could bring back the crapload of memories the two of you had shared. You slipped into one of the vacant seats in the waiting room, clutching the charts against your chest.

"No sitting, (Y/S/N), you've only just started your day. Let's go! We've got jobs to do. Chop-chop!" Bailey walked by, gesturing for you to get up and go.

You stood up, took the deepest breath and made a promise to yourself-

It's been years. You changed. You were no longer the EMT Teddy used to know. You took great pride in the fact you had grown, as a person and as a doctor. You were a resident now. Besides, for all you knew, Teddy didn't want anything to do with you anymore. She must have changed too. Besides, who knows what happened to her after you lost each other.

Teddy might be back, but your feelings were long gone.

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You walked into the cafeteria, talking with some of the Mercy West residents as you grabbed your lunch, placing it on the tray in front of you. You rolled your eyes as they started to gossip, happy you had your food so you could walk away from that. Shaking your head, you turned around to scan the cafeteria, your eyes landing on Arizona's, who waved you over. You froze in your spot as you saw the back of Teddy's head, who was seated at the same table. Without thinking, you turned around and left the cafeteria in a hurry, the tray still in your hands. You hoped you had been fast enough before Teddy could have seen who Arizona had waved to.

Facing Teddy was not on your to-do list any time soon.

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You had successfully managed to avoid running into your old friend all day, rather doing scut or helping out in the clinic than scrubbing in or helping with consults. Anything to stay out of Teddy's way.

"So, will you tell me why you ran like a chicken earlier today?" Arizona wore a playful smile as she from the doorway how you were grabbing your things.

"Um-" You shuffled some things around in your locker, trying to stall coming up with an answer. Arizona was one of your best friends and already knew whatever you would say would be a complete lie, "Stomach ache. Needed a toilet."

Arizona nodded her head, her playful grin not disappearing, "Yeah... I usually like my lunch with some nice sound effects and extra stench too."

"Wha-," You stopped to turn around, "I did not eat my lunch in a toilet."

Arizona shrugged noncommittally, going to the next topic, "Had fun removing haemorrhoids at the clinic today?"

You sighed defeatedly and pushed your jacket in your bag, glaring at Arizona, who was having way too much fun with this.

"Fine. I ate lunch in a toilet cubicle and helped out at the clinic today. What's wrong with that? They need all the help they can get."

"Meanwhile you could've scrubbed in with Doctor Altman and I. She let Yang fix the kid's Alcapa. Could've been you." She shrugged.

She patted your back as you passed her out of the lounge, letting out a groan at the missed opportunity. You clung your bag over your shoulder, greeting colleagues left and right, trying to play it off, but knowing Arizona was following close behind.

"Nice try," Arizona whispered in your ear as you waited for the lifts to arrive.

You sighed and turned around, about to shoot back a witty reply to wash the grin away from your friend's face, until you saw Teddy round the corner into the hallway, coming your way while she talked to an intern. The lifts dinged behind you, but you quickly pulled Arizona away, pushing her into the door that led to the staircases.

"Okay- wait, what just happened?" Arizona let out a breathy chuckle, her eyebrows raised as she tried to decipher what was going on in your head.

"We're taking the stairs down today! Let's go, I haven't reached my 10k steps yet!" You were already walking down, leaving Arizona to look back, thinking she might have missed something, until she eventually followed.

"Okay, tell me what's going on because you've been incredibly weird, all day long." Arizona stopped you when you were about to walk out of the hospital. You looked her in the eyes, seeing the genuine concern.

"Doctor Robbins!" You shut your eyes at the familiar voice and quickly turned around, slipping into the gift store unnoticed, still in hearing distance,

"I wanted to give you this for the follow-up surgery but you left so quickly." Teddy smiled softly, watching how Arizona looked around, noticing you had dipped, "Just read through it at home and we can discuss tomorrow."

"Oh, yeah! Sure! Thanks." Arizona's eyes fell on the back of your head as you tried to distract yourself by looking at the many different postcards of Seattle.

Teddy furrowed her eyebrows slightly, "Um... okay, well, we'll talk tomorrow."

"Sure thing!"

You waited until Teddy had disappeared into the lift again before stepping out from behind the rack, Arizona immediately pulling you out of the gift shop, her mouth agape as she watched with excitement, "You are crushing on Doctor Altman!"

"What? No!"

"What else can it be? That's why you've been avoiding every place she's at like the plague. I knew you would like her, but I didn't know you would like her this much." She raised her eyebrows suggestively, the grin on her face only widening as you sighed and walked out of the hospital.

"I'm not crushing on her. I haven't even met her yet. I'm just... shy... to meet new people. I need more time."

Arizona snorted as she followed you to her car, "Yeah, sure, that's it." But she grew serious when she saw the conflict in your eyes, "You know you can tell me, right? Anything. I don't judge."

You turned in your seat, it was clear you were battling thoughts in your head. You let yourself fall back against the seat as you sighed,

"I don't want Teddy to see me. Not yet, at least."

Arizona rose an eyebrow, silently telling you she needed more information if you wanted her to understand.

"We knew each other. Back in New York."

Arizona nodded slowly, knowing about your life as an EMT in the Big Apple, "Did you fall out? Did you fight? What happened?"

"That's the thing- I don't know. One day we were friends, the next... she was gone? This is the first time I've seen her since 2001 and... I don't know, it threw me off. I don't know what to do or say now."

"She hasn't seen you yet?"

You shrugged, "No, I don't think so. Not that I know."

"Well, were you great friends before she left?"

"You could say that. I just-" You stopped yourself, sneaking a glance at Arizona, who looked back at you with an encouraging smile, "Oh God- okay... I just always feared I might have scared her away?"

Arizona pursed her lips before hearing what you rambled out next, "I had like, the biggest crush on her and for a while, I thought she had one on me too until I realised she was like that with our mutual friend Allison too and-"

"Doctor Altman likes girls?!" Arizona gasped, intrigue written on her face. You quickly shut her down, not wanting to start the spread of another rumour in the hospital,

"No?! I don't know! I don't think so. No."

You sat in silence for a while until Arizona opened her mouth, "Well, I think it would be best if you just rip the band-aid off tomorrow. I don't think she'd appreciate finding out you avoided her for as long as you could. It's probably going to be awkward either way."

You nodded softly, knowing Arizona was right, "Will you help me?"

"Pfff, of course! I got your back." She smiled at you as she drove out of the car park.

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You kept yourself busy by alternating between buttoning and unbuttoning your lab coat and fixing your hair, wanting to look presentable since Teddy hadn't seen you in years. It was silly, how you hadn't been able to let go of the nervous habits you had whenever you'd be around her. But the worry Teddy would be disappointed to see you again made it worse this time.

"Stop that, you look great." Arizona smiled encouragingly and fixed your collar as you started to play with your fingers instead, needing something to try and keep your nerves under control.

"Ready?" She asked you as she stopped in front of the room Teddy had paged her to. You gave her a curt nod and took in a breath as she opened the door, revealing Teddy who was looking at the whiteboard in front of her.

"Doctor Altman, I brought a resident who's gonna help me with this case. Hope you don't mind."

"Not at all! I went ahead and-" She stopped midsentence when she turned around, her eyes locking with yours. Sure, you had changed over the years, but you knew Teddy would recognize you in an instant.

"(Y/N)?" She breathed out, her face going from confusion to shock to excitement in just a few seconds.

"Oh my God, it's really you?" She walked up to you, her arms open to welcome you in a hug. Teddy let out an awkward chuckle as she noticed you didn't move a muscle, but she slowly and unsurely wrapped her arms around you when you took a hesitant step forward.

"It's so good to see you again! How- I- What?!" She smiled and rubbed her cheeks, trying to wrap her head around the fact you were standing in front of her, and trying to stop herself from panicking. "You left New York? When? You're a resident now!?"

"It's been years, a lot can happen." You squeezed your fingers behind your back, realising how harsh it sounded, no matter how much she deserved the cold shoulder. You just wanted to get this over with.

Teddy's smile faltered, but only momentarily, before her eyes filled with glee again, "So- what's happening? What's new? How did you get here? Are you.... third year? Or-"

"I love this little reunion but maybe it's best we focus on the surgery now...We've got little time." Arizona butted in with an apologetic smile, seeing you needed a breather.

"Yes! Of course, apologies." Teddy turned back to you, her face unreadable, but her gut wrenched with the guilt she suddenly felt. Your eyes said it all.

"We...um, should catch up later." She spoke before she quickly turned to face the whiteboard again, muttering something under her breath, hoping to be able to mask her panic in the next few hours of you two working together.

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"Go!" Arizona mumbled out, bumping your hip when you stopped, seeing she was gesturing to Teddy waiting in line. "Go break the ice!"

"I thought I already did that this morning?!" You whisper-yelled back but was pushed forward by your friend.

"Oh- hi!" You shot her a wry smile, albeit awkwardly, as Teddy turned around. "Want to...um... eat lunch outside with me? Catch up? It snowed last night and uh, I know you used to love-"

But you stopped as you saw Teddy nod and smile, "I'd like that."

"So, Seattle, huh?" Teddy started once you had found a vacant bench outside the hospital. "I thought you said you could never see yourself leaving New York?"

"Yeah, well, I got the opportunity to do my residency here... I wanted to start fresh, and New York isn't what it's been after-" You stopped, noticing how Teddy tensed. She took her time eating her sandwich, stalling an answer before she eventually had to speak.

"It's good to see you ended up where you wanted to be. Seems like all those times I helped you study for med school weren't in vain." She smiled with her eyes as she took another quick bite of her lunch. She tried so hard to read your energy, but you seemed closed off.

"Don't get me wrong, I loved being an EMT, but this is good. This is great. I'm happy now. This is the right path for me."

Teddy gave you a soft smile as she truly took you in for the first time, daring to stare at your side profile now that you were focused on your own lunch. You wore your hair differently now, your face looked a bit more mature and you also seemed more reserved, but maybe that just had to do with the awkward tension still floating between you two. Your eyes though, still gave her the same comfort, even if she had lost the ability to read them, apparently.

"What's it going to be? You got your eyes set on a specialty already?"

You nodded while taking a sip of your drink, "Cardio or peds... though I sometimes like to dabble in neuro."

Teddy let out a breathy chuckle, "Ha! Knew it! I recognized the light in your eyes every time I helped you study cardio cases."

"Well, you made it fun. It was hard not to like it by the way you explained it. You seemed passionate about it so of course, I would try to feel the same way."

She nodded to herself, the corner of her lip curling up slightly before she changed the subject, "Where were you on Monday? Doctor Robbins and I did an alcapa surgery together, you would have loved that. Would have been the perfect match for you."

"Oh, um, I don't know, I think I was helping in the pit all day? It was a busy day." Deciding to change the subject once more, you opened your mouth again, "Where did you end up? You left but never said anything, I was worried for weeks until I eventually had to let it go."

Teddy stopped and put her lunch down, "I joined the army..." she watched closely as you raised your eyebrows in surprise, "Almost immediately after... That's were I met Hunt and that's how I got here."

You nodded softly, trying to put it all into place in your head. She obviously gave you the short explanation, as she had left out years of details. But you figured she did so for a reason, and you respected her decision.

"Wasn't I worth a goodbye though?" You chuckled dryly, half joking, half serious.

"God- no, I mean yes! Of course! You deserved an explanation, that's on me, I just... had to go. I couldn't breathe. I hadn't been in a right state of mind for a while, especially after my parents passed away... and then Allison..."

You put your hand on her leg, "Teddy, it's alright, you don't have to explain further. Sorry... I just- All I actually needed to know was if you were still alive. I was dying inside not knowing if you were alright-" You bit the insides of your cheek as Teddy's hand was placed over yours. She sighed and looked out in front of her, her fingers tangling with yours as she squeezed your hand.

"I am so sorry. You deserved a proper farewell."

You nodded, agreeing, but decided to stay silent, sensing that Teddy already knew how bad she had messed up.

"So um, are you staying here? This is not a temporary thing?"

She squeezed your hand again, just to reassure you, even if she felt tortured by all the lost memories and feelings resurfacing,

"Yeah, I plan on staying." She cleared her throat, "Which is why I'm glad we worked this out right now? I mean, we're good, right?"

Thoughts circled through your head while you felt your chest tighten. Having to be around Teddy again would be a challenge, especially seeing how you left things. But you could manage. You were a surgical resident, for heaven's sake, and you were not going to let an old friend from the past ruin anything.

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