#but i loved the film sooooooooooooooooooooooooo much

[teddybeartoji]

hello this is me rambling about monkey man (2024)! LONG story very short it was very very good i loved it very very much. a lot of good action a lot of blood a lot of me smiling. spoilers under cut!

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oke oke deep breath in and a deep one out. i will try to make this as understandable as possible but i feel like i'm genuinely tweaking a little bit rn. from the film and also from the new meds so yk bear with me also wait this is incredibly incredibly biased bc i love fighting and i love action hehe

anyway. this was dev patel's directorial debut and uuhhhhh. well. he fucking did it. i. there's nothing bad to say. it's very obvious that he loves films; loves being in them, loves watching them, loves learning them, loves making them. it's clear that he did his homework for this. he mentioned in an interview how he's been an action lover ever since he was a kid but he was just never offered the right role. he talks about how he got scripts for just being the side-kick, the tech guy yk some random guy who just gets A Moment. but he knew he had way more to offer and fuck yeah he did.

so idk who happens to be reading this fuck ass review but if you by any chance don't know who dev patel is by name, maybe you've heard of slumdog millionaire (2008) or lion (2016) or the green knight (2021). point is that he's really fucking good and he deserves more recognition. blabla i'm not actually doing a review i will be going insane now.

i LOVE when mc's fucking suck ass. i love when they get beat. i love when they're weak it's just sooooo fucking boring when they're immediately some untouchable god. it feels good to watch them learn how to control their need to just go apeshit bc that simply... won't fucking work lmao. i love when the mc's are nervous, are just so determined to go through with their plan even though they're obviously in over their head. it's delicious and it's my favourite trope. honorary mention to indiana jones my favourite fucking nerd loser who gets into fights and then groans and moans and sweats and man he just wants to ramble about his little artefacts.

i loved the first big fight!!!!!!!!!!! it's between the mc with the shaky hands and the police chief who very obviously knows how to fight. (the mc kind of does too he does boxing matches for money but he's kinda bad yk). it's super bloody and it gets soooooo fucking messy. a random person happens to be there too and now the mc has to deal with two people and well shit. he's just now fucking doing well. he's getting beat, he's getting stabbed, he's being choked, his gun is fuck knows where and yeah everything is just bad.

though in my head i kept thinking about how i wish i could see the fighting a bit more. the scenes were short, cut after cut after cut, the camera moved around and it was placed at weird angles (IT'S WASN'T ACTUALLY BAD THOUGH THIS IS JUST ME BEING REALLY PICKY RN) but i wasn't too upset bc messy fights are also very fun, not every fight can be a dance and that's completely fine. so it was very fast paced, a lot was happening but it did all suit the situation - adrenaline filled mc fights his big ass nemesis in a public place - ofc it's gonna be messy.

also when he tries to finally escape the situation he decides to jump through a window to get into the main room - the glass doesn't break and he just falls down to the floor. 5+ i love that shit so much.

and thennnnnnn. just when i was again thinking about how every fight can't be beautiful blabla it's only natural etc etc - he enters his little training arc. btw i thought the training arc was made very well (overall the film had a lot of the so called Cliches but i thought they all worked perfectly and i had no complaints abt them).

anyway... the thing he learns is Rhythm. i almost made some sort of a noise when i realized this okay i got very giddy. he starts learning about how fighting isn't just throwing punches like he has been doing but it's about flow and rhythm and focus - a dance. while he's practicing his punches, a guy at the temple starts setting him a pattern with his drums and through that he learns how to make his movements smoother, sharper, how to lose the unnecessary steps, how to stay more clear headed, so he wouldn't just go in thrashing but with an actual goal in mind. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaafuck i loved that soooooooooooooo much

and it made a change. during the next fights, the camera stood still more, the shots were wider, you could actually see what he's doing. it's was messy only in a sense of that blood was being splattered everywhere but the fighting itself did turn into a kind of a dance. FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK YOUUU IT WAS SO COOL OKAY I'M GEEKING RN I'M TRYING SO HARD TO STAY FOCUSED HERE

YOU KNOW A PERSON IS AN ACTION FAN WHEN THEY KNOW HOW TO GET CREATIVE WITH IT. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. deep breaths deep breaths. it's not only about guns and knives (although i do love my guns and knives) - it's about pots, pans, toilet seats, trays, walls, furniture, the ground itself. everything can be used in a fight and i fucking love it. another honorary mention just bc i want to and this one goes out to atomic blonde (2017) where the female mc has to fight multiple men and she too uses just about everything that's around her - the fridge, a hose, a pan, a glass table; later in another fight she uses a corkscrew, she uses a ministove etc etc. it just makes the fight sooo much more interesting and you can play around with it sooooooooooo much you can literally do anything. i'm soooo normal right nowwwwwwwwwww my hands are shaking.

speaking of cool moves i'd like to point some out from this one too. the mc is fighting in an elevator against two guys, it's a knife fight (btw i am very obviously veeeery geeked abt this too bc i love when the fighting is happening in a small closed space wahh it's so cool). he kills one of the guys and then he's pressing his knife at the other guy's neck right. he doesn't have much power bc the guy is pushing against his knife hand and he's using his other hand to hold the guy against the wall. he manages to press the knife in a little bit and then... he leans closer... and bites the handle... and pushes it inside the guy's throat with his mouth. his teeth? you get my point. IT WAS FUCKING SICK AS FUCK THE BLOOD SPLATTERED EVERYWHERE AND HE LOOKED INSANE AND I THINK I MIGHT'VE ACTUALLY GASPED OUT LOUD AT THIS I WON'T EVEN LIE

have to also mention the Axe Fight. very fucking cool i'm sorry i don't have any other words in my vocabulary rn but it really was cool. an axe is such an interesting weapon to go against bc it has the range and it has the weight. it's very hard to stop right? like you can't just fucking parry that shit lmao + the shape of the blade is a little too fucked for that. but it does have it's downsides - since it's heavy it can get stuck very easily - it gets stuck in the walls and in the floor, giving the mc a moment to counter back. it has the range but lacks in speed - for you to really do any damage you have to take the second to give it momentum which also gives your opponent time to strike. bonk now i'm just yapping about axes apparently are you still here i love you

OH WAIT BEFORE I FORGET I HAVE TO SAY THAT THE MUSIC THEY PICKED FOR THIS FUCKING FILM FUCKED SO HARD. SO DAMN HARD. I WAS BONERED UP JUST FROM THAT WHEWWW.

another cool little thing was that they mentioned john wick hihihii. that was fun i like the little show of appreciation for other films in films. i think it's very cute. like omfgg yeahhh i fucking loved your film i need to mention it in my own one!!!! yeahhhhh!!!!! very lovely

oke i have one more cool move to offer and it is theeeee knife through the hand move!!!!! everybody cheers!!!! the mc already has a knife in his stomach and the super evil bad guy is going to stab him with another one but the mc takes the hit with his hand and it's wwwooooowwwwwwwwww sooo sexyy!! so cool!!! and he then ofc manages to turn it around and stab the super evil bad guy with his own knife!!!!! everybody cheers even more!!!!! shaky hands and all but he still does it!!!!! and he looked very good while doing it. yum

since i'm already just Mentioning shit i am also going to mention the fact that they made the police chief like a sexy evil man. wheww. yeah. he's like awwwwwful and very very bad but man.. why he kinda hot. this is just about appearance i think we should make more hot bad guys.

scar mention. bad guy had a cool scar.

woman mention. very beautiful lady gets covered in blood while in a beautiful beautiful dress. a+ would watch again

okay i think this is it for now thank you for reading. go watch the film. or don't. a lot of action and blood and it might not be for you but it most definitely was for meeeeee hihihihih love you mwah