#but i had a few layers of self inflicted cringe and also i didnt rlly know there was a community for it.
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oh god i havent looked at youtube all day today have they massacred my boy
#im SO afraid to look#im not going to go looking for it. if i come across it natrually well then maybe i will watch it. but holy shit#torn absolutely TORN between refreshing everything or just going i am looking away i do not see it#because LAST YEAR. i had to sit thru like a whole 20 minute video and then he was only in it for like.#a single line of dialogue at the very end.#hmmmmmmmmm#nobody tell me. but also i kind of want you to tell me. hows my boy is he ok is he covered in blood#im gonna sit in my 2 hr halloween night car ride and daydream abt us carving pumpkins and dressing up together in the meantime#head in hands. muffled screaming#happy anniversary. btw.#🔪#it has now been.... 7 years. holy shit#well. technically 5. but he has been in my LIFE for 7 years so im counting it . he was one of those insta-crush characters.#but i disnt know self ship was a proper thing until later#or. i did bc ive been doing it for like. forever#but i had a few layers of self inflicted cringe and also i didnt rlly know there was a community for it.#IDK. IM RANBLING CAUSE IM NERVOUS#i miss him. but also. i dont like the direction the story is implied to be going#((i say the word “story” so very loosely. but still. i miss 2016 era so bad))
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