#but i feel like the first few times i talk to someone are like a job interview

[baepsays]

BE MY VALENTINE -`♡´- ⸻ JJK MEN x READER

description⊹♡ valentine's day with different jujustu kaisen men.

pairings⊹♡ Geto Suguru x reader, Nanami Kento x reader, Fushiguro Toji x reader, Kamo Choso x reader, Higuruma Hiromi x reader, Ryomen Sukuna x reader, Gojo Satoru x reader cw⊹♡ oral sex (m! receiving & f! receiving), face riding, grinding/dry humping, lot of dirty talk, uses of pet names, finger fucking, squirting, some spit action :3c, overstimulation, breeding kink, secret relationship, established relationships, degradation, mean name calling (i.e., slut), TEASING!, fem oriented reader in some scenarios, uses of fem pronouns in some scenarios,

a/n: playlist by yours truly, songs in order of each character. my valentine's gift to you guys <3 (let's hope there is not many mistakes i have not proof read half of it)

GETO SUGURU જ⁀➴ ♡ I'm tuned into that pussy, so don't touch the door

Having a musician for a boyfriend is hard. Especially when you're not really a public figure yourself. And it's harder during certain holidays to see each other, one of those days is valentine's day.

You almost lost all hope when all of the plans you two made started to fall short one by one. It wasn’t until at the end of the day, when you fully gave up on seeing Suguru, someone rang your doorbell. You were expecting the food ordered, and instead it was a huge figure clad in all black, mask and sunglasses on his face, and a hat covering his head. From afar— or up close really— it would seem like a burglar, but also what burglar rings the doorbell and patiently waits to be let in. But you've been in this situation before, so it was not surprising when the guy just picked you up on his shoulder and walked right in like it was his own apartment. 

“Goodness Sugu, give me a warning first.” you whined, despite the smile stretching on your face. “Wouldn’t be a surprise then sugar.” 

In a flash he dropped the bouquet, and bags filled with gifts, by the door. Then he threw his phone on the couch before walking into the bedroom. It always brought you to awe, having one of the biggest musicians and rockstars, stripping in your humble apartment. “At least eat and freshen up first.” you chuckled, leaning back up on your elbows, “You say that yet you are ogling me like a piece of meat.” he said with a half smile. 

“Gotta give you a banger before valentine’s day is over.” 

That’s how you ended up kneeling on the floor, sucking Suguru’s cock— despite his complaints. Yet here he was, throwing his head back in pleasure and shoving your head down on his cock. Suguru may not be a big moaner, but he is one to whine and a grunt. “Come on sugar, you can take more. I know you can.” Suguru tangled his fingers in your hair, scratching your scalp with one hand and pushing his cock down your throat by your neck. Drawing out little tears from the corner of your eyes. “Aw. my poor baby, can’t take more?” you hum with your lips touching the base of his cock, drool spilling and pooling around him, as you look up at him; praying the big doe eyes work on him to have some mercy on you. 

“You are going to disappoint me sugar? Hmm?” he pauses to let out a grunt then continues. “I snuck out of work for you, got you your favorite flowers and all those gifts, and you are telling me a few weeks away from me and your throat has forgotten my shape? You wound me.” 

So, to disprove his point, you use your occupied mouth to answer him— by putting one of your hands on his solid thighs and the other on his hard abdomen, almost finding comfort on his soft happy trail— and bobbing your head up and down on his dick. Which results in him throwing his head back with a really loud grunt this time, echoing through your walls. “Th-there goes— Hah— my superstar.” 

Suguru’s body starts recoiling, as one of his hands finds itself on the base of your throat, feeling the stretch of his cock going in and out of the tight canal. He slides one of his foot to rub your panty clad cunt, making you moan and whimper, as you take him out of your mouth to lick around and press your tongue on his tip, while you jerk him off with both of your hands. As you continue to grind on his leg, lick and pump his cock— he shoots ropes of cum all over your face and shoves himself back in your mouth to let you get a taste of the rest of it, heavy and twitching on your tongue. 

Just as you swallow his cum and he pulls you up to his lap, his phone starts ringing in your living room. Suguru continues to kiss you and suck around your neck, unbothered, because he knows it is from his manager. The phone keeps on ringing; one missed call, two missed calls, three missed calls—  on the fourth call, you shift to get off of him and get his phone. When he slams you down on your bed and pressed himself against you.

“Do not even dare to open that door.”

NANAMI KENTO જ⁀➴ ♡ he's taking me to cloud nine

Finding a man who genuinely wanted to be with you, these days, was not an easy task. If you're a person who wants to settle down with someone by 30, have kids by 32 and retire by 60—then you are bound to lose some hope after going on dates, ending up in situationships after situationships, and of course, getting ghosted. So, when you met Nanami Kento, it just felt too good to be true.

You met him through a mutual friend, as you were on a cafe date with your friend and he happened to be there as well. When she introduced you two, you still remember the tightening in your stomach and the shiver that ran down your spine, as he shook your hand. While you debated with yourself the entire day about asking your friend for his number—he texted you. And you just knew, if you had to put a number on it, he was a perfect ten (or maybe your standards have become too low after dating garbage men).

After the most perfect first date, he made sure to show you what a standard should be—way above the bare minimum. And everytime you would doubt yourself or the relationship the two of you started to foster, he would make sure to break down such doubts with vehement confidence that you were it for him. He made sure to tell you that he wants to be exclusive with you on the very first date, got you flowers every week, got you personally baked goods, had you over at his place for a home cooked meal, reassured you that if you did not want to do anything more than making out, then he would not ever mind that— he wanted to be with you on your terms, at the condition of having you all to himself. And you could not believe how you manifested him.

It has now been 1.5 months since you two became an item. And this valentine’s day you wanted to take the leap and have this man nail you down. 

It was the most picture perfect day, and at the end of it when he parked his car in front of your building, you made sure to drag him in with you. “Are you sure about this honey?” he sighed in your mouth, the grip of his arms getting tighter around your waist “more than sure Ken.” you said, as you dove back in to kiss him.

Nanami had you sprawled on your bed, one hand holding himself up to not crush you with his weight and the other pressing you further into the soft sheets by your waist. “I am asking this one last time sweetheart, are you sure? Because if we progress, it might be hard for me to hold back.” Nanami asked you with the most gentle tone, looking softly into your own clouded eyes, his forehead resting on yours— “I have never been more sure about anything in my life. Please Ken.” you whined as you pulled back on your lips, “just so you know, i might not be so gentle, but rest assured if you want to stop any moment, i would not hesitate to do so.” and you nodded along to him, i mean how could you have known an angel like Nanami Kento could be such a freak in the sheets— in his defense, he did warn you. 

Kento had both of your legs hanging on his shoulders, as his fingers dug and left a mark around your hips. Who knew Nanami was the guy to leave marks all over his significant other’s body, except places easily seen by others. “You there with me love?” he said with his face buried in the crook of your neck, voice hoarse from all that grunting he did on your cunt when he ate you out like you two did not have an excellent dinner just earlier. Probably also why you just laid there overstimulated out of your mind, to answer him with words. All you could fathom was a low hum, as he continued to thrust into you. Before this you’ve only felt his dick through his pants, and even then you knew he was hung; but having him in his sheer naked glory, nailing the shit out of you—as you wanted— you were perplexed how did he even fit himself inside you. 

“You need to use your words sweetheart.” he said with a mean thrust as he let one of his hands go from your waist to your head, holding your face up by the chin to look into his eyes. “Ca-can’t Ke-n” you mumbled somehow, while your vision started to lose focus. “Yes you can. Be a good girl for your Ken, and tell me what you want.” he demanded with each thrust closing down of your cervix, making you almost go numb. 

“Please Ken. harder. Your cock. more” you uttered somehow, arms tightening around his biceps.

“Filthy little mouth you’ve got on you honey, like your filthy pussy gripping onto me” he paused to get out a grunt “you hear her? She sure has been waiting for me huh?” Nanami said in a patronizing tone. 

You were in no condition to say anything more, as you vehemently twitched and frailed around under him, feeling the tip of his thick cock hitting your cervix at an tremendous speed and impact. “Want—god— me to make you cum love?” you somehow managed to  nod a yes, “Anything. Just anything and everything for you.”

And with those last words from Nanami, and one of his hand rubbing circles on your clit, you came undone around his cock. The waves of spasm and squelching noise between your bodies, drove him near his own climax as he continued to pump in and out of you through your release. He bottomed out for a second and flatly laid in your arms, letting your twitching legs down his legs and gathering your limb body in his arms. He kissed every feature on your face and whispered praises in your ears, as you got down the glowing high of your third orgasm of the night. Your eyes started to close, consciousness slowly drifting away, when Ken whispered in your ears—

“I must apologize, love, but I cannot let you sleep just yet. ” he pressed a soft kiss on the shell of your ear, as hips started moving again. “Your pretty cunt just got simply acquainted with me, I must leave a better impression on her, ”

FUSHIGURO TOJI જ⁀➴ ♡ just take what's yours, don't run from it

Imagine getting broken up with a week before valentine's week. Then doing overtime for the entire week, and having to go on a business trip with the coworker you cannot go a second without getting into a disagreement (sure let’s call it that). You were forced to spend the day before and the day of Valentine's Day doing work, but you were also thankful to be busy on the eve, otherwise you might have spent the day rotting on the couch and wallowing in your misery. 

And yet of all the people you couldn’t have guessed at the end of the business trip, Fushiguro Toji would take you out for dinner and pay for a meal. Apparently he made a reservation and everything, in a city he was not even familiar with. All that effort to comfort a coworker, he apparently did not even like, was a little unbelievable. Hence the question you asked was only valid, “why are you doing all of this?” 

“What do you mean doll? Just being nice to ya’.” he says as an easy smile stretches across his face. “You being nice to me is definitely strange.” you said suspiciously.

“I’m always nice, especially to you, doll. You're just always a bit paranoid.” He spoke while working on his plate. Surely this dinner meant nothing, it also meant nothing when he comforted you the day before on the flight, or when he bought your exact coffee order. I suppose it also meant nothing when you guys ended up making out on the cab ride home. Or how you ended up in his hotel room naked, on his bed, sitting in between his legs with your back facing him as his fingers went in and out of you. 

“T-there.” you somehow let out in between obscene moans. You have never had hands as huge as his quite literally ramming in and out of you. The girth and length of his finger, as well as the callousness made you question what was behind his underwear. 

“Here doll? Want me to go harder? Make ya’ cum?” you nod a weak yes to him. Unable to use the voice stuck in your throat, as his fingers started grinding themselves inside you, putting the right amount of pressure when needed and looking for the spongy walls behind your clit to drive you right where you needed to be. 

“Wah, that’s all ya’ need to cum? Hmm. that shitty ex of yours sure did not know how to handle all that huh?” he smirked against your neck as his other hand slid down, from where it found home on your tits, to rub constant circles on your clit. Right as he did so, your hand flew to his arm, clawing to either make him stop or make him keep going—he would not have it any other way. 

“You gon’ come on my fingers doll? Hmm? Get yourself wet enough to fit my cock in ya’ tight pussy?” he whispered in your ears as both of his hands continued working on you, his middle and ring finger found the spot inside your walls which made you jerk and whine. As you started to go practically jelly in his arms, he pushed past a third finger inside. “N-no, can,can not.” you pleaded to make him stop, mind and tongue going mush to say anything comprehensible. 

“If you can’t even take that much doll, how are ya’ gonna take my cock? ” he let out a little chuckle as you came undone around his fingers and lost the rest of your sanity when he landed his lips on yours to probably comfort you through the orgasm. 

“Let’s make sure ya’ forget that shitty guy.”

KAMO CHOSO જ⁀➴ ♡ don't hesitate, come into me

Dating Kamo Choso was a dream. You met him during college; he was the tatted up nerd who spoke to no one but the few people around him; a cliche really, who looks scary from a far but is a total softy. And no one knew that better than you of course (other than his brothers). 

So it has been really difficult being away from him, all the way in another city, pursuing your further education while he finally opened his tattoo shop he wanted to since forever. As happy as you were for him, to finally have his artistry being appreciated, you couldn't help but feel a bit salty—well it was not easy to own your own business. So you did not push him any further when he told you that he can not go make it to you on valentine’s. Initially the plan was for you to visit him back home, spend the morning with him and his brothers, get dinner with him and just well, it has been a while since you two did anything more than sexting—even phone sex has become hard to organize with how busy the schedules have been. So you were really excited about the lingerie you bought especially for him. 

At the end of the day when you strolled in your apartment building, hating on couples around you the entire day, salty about not having your own boyfriend near you— you were nothing but surprised to see standing there in the middle of your apartment; wearing an apron, and setting up the table with food he probably cooked. That was a sight you could get used to, you thought. And suddenly had tears streaming down your cheeks. It took Choso awhile to sit you on his lap on the couch, and comfort you, who knew you were that frustrated about everything. After you calmed down, you guys had dinner, which was simply amazing. And exchanged the gifts you got each other, seeing him open the wrapped up gifts you got him, made you realize how disappointed you would have been if you simply had to mail it to him. 

And when he opened the last gift, with black frilly and lace lingerie set; he went beat red. You took the set from his hands and stood up from where you were sitting on the bed, “Let me properly show you your gift baby.”

For a guy as sweet and soft, your boyfriend sure was a freak when it came to you. It was especially apparent when he had his face buried in between your thighs and hands gripping onto them, keeping them in place, practically smothering him—and he would not have it any other way—as he licked the juices coming from your pussy, through your panties. The pressure from his tongue and the rough texture from the panties adding onto the pleasure. “You are always so sweet, baby.” he hummed in between his licks.

Suddenly he started to shove his tongue and a finger inside you, through your panties. As he slightly pushed away part of the panties covering your clit to suck on it zealously.  “Cho. baby, please just. Omg” you went on, not making much sense of anything, simply aching to have him completely inside you. Have his shape reformed around your walls. “Won’t let me savour you a little while? Please?” he looked up at you, giving you big doe puppy eyes—his face was still partially covered by your thighs, and his tongue was flat on your clit. The sight alone could have a person faint, and here he was fingering you and simultaneously eating you out, through your pantues. The feeling of lace and sometimes his fingers or tongue scratching your walls, had you delirious. 

He pushed away the panties and finally used two fingers, to stretch you open, to slide his tongue inside you. With a blurry gaze and numb jaw, he ate you out like he was never getting the opportunity to do this again. Probably took a minute or so for him to have you squirt all over his face. When he came up from between your, now jelly, legs— his face was soaked in your juices, his eyeliner  all messed up and hair sticking to his eyes, which were also soaked. His gaze stayed stuck on your cunt as he opened his mouth to stick out his tongue and have some of his spit dribble on your pussy. To then go back in and clean it all up with big stripes of lick. 

“Come into me baby,  fill the empty spaces.” you mutter in a low barely audible voice, before he ripped your panties off you.

HIGURUMA HIROMI જ⁀➴ ♡ wanna try out some freaky positions?

Higuruma Hiromi is the perfect husband, within his capacity. He is a dedicated lawyer, an attentive father, a good friend to many and just very tired. So you don't hold special days over his head—after all he goes through to make your birthday, the kids' birthdays, and anniversaries special, it was the least you could do. Which meant valentine's day plans were left in your care.

And when after dinner you guys were making out on the bed, thankfully kids were sent to spend the day at grandparent’s place; Hiromi thought that the longer morning cuddle sesh, brunch, gifts and dinner was the end of it—but when he went to grab a hold of your ass to move you off from on top of him to under him, he was taken aback to find his hands bound to the headboard with pink fuzzy handcuffs.

“I suppose this is part of your gift, darling?” he let out a chuckle as he slid down to lay flat on the bed, completely giving up the reins to you.

With a faux innocent little smile you said—“Serving you punishment for being so irresistible.” “Sure darling.”

With that Higuruma had you bouncing on his cock. Even when it was only halfway in and already had you struggling, it made you question how you took him on the regular. You whined to Hiromi “So perfect Hiro, ugh. Help me out here.”

“I thought you wanted to do everything darling?” He smiled at you, probing at you. “Please. Please Hiromi.” With one snap of his hips, the entirety of his cock was inside you. And within a moment Hiromi’s hands were freed from the flimsy decorative handcuffs. The very next moment his hands were on your hips, as held you down on his lap. He had you sit there pretty, as he did all the work to snap his cock in and out of you at a speed you could not achieve by yourself.

His cock kissed your cervix again and again as if it would almost penetrate through the canal and go straight into your womb. He had every intention of making a third little Higuruma tonight, as he filled your walls with his seed. As he slipped out of you, you laid completely flat on top of him, out of all the energy you thought you had.

And after a quick rest Higuruma maneuvered you to sit on right on top of his face, holding you down to his nose and mouth by your hips, neglecting all your protests in fear of suffocating him. At the end of the day he was well aware of your love for his nose, and he was never afraid to use it to shower you in affection.

“Goodness Hiro, you are- can y- ah.” You stuttered when his tongue shoved the cum dripping from your cunt further in, making sure no droplet was left behind. So that you take every speck of his seed and bury it in your womb. All the while licking around the entrance to clean up any leftover cum, giving little kitten licks of comfort to your clit.

“What? I thought we have tried freakier positions.”

RYOMEN SUKUNA જ⁀➴ ♡ like this pussy designed for you

Sukuna was not one to be excited for festivities, especially valentine's day. He believes it is definitely a scam. And yet when you get all dejected about not having any plans with him for the day, he reluctantly tells you to clear your schedule and takes the entire leap. He plans the day so thoroughly and to every last detail, you wouldn't be able to tell if he didn't have any experience in this area.

I'm talking breakfast in bed, gifts, whatever you've eyed in the last couple of days. Flowers and chocolates, dinner at a Michelin star restaurant, a hotel room with a heart shaped bed, rose petals scattered all over it, dimmed lights, candles and all—as cliche as it was, you deeply appreciated all of it. 

Especially how the silk sheet felt on your naked body, and how your body felt when you felt Sukuna’s pulsating tip ramming itself up to your cervix. Or how the silk sheets sliped right out of your hands as you held onto it for your dear life. How your entire body was slipping out of his grasp. 

“Stop running from me brat.” He held up your legs tightly to his chest, securing you so you'd not slip up from the sheer impact of the pressure he was putting onto your hips.

“You liked your valentine’s day?” He bent down to move his face closer to your ears, folding your body in the process. “YES. YES.” you shouted, to answer his question or to his cock hitting you in the right places—not apparent.

“Yeah. Let me give it to you good, hmm?” He lifted off your hips from the bed and git on his knees to alter the position slightly, and reach your inside at an angel he didn't before. The thrusts of his hips sent literal shocks and shivers through your body. One of his tatted up arms, curled itself around your ass and lifted off of it to come back down, to place a glass shattering smack. Which was surely going to leave behind a mark. Sukuna was not one to be afraid of leaving marks anyway. The marks of his teeth and purple bruises scattered all over the expanse of your body was witness to that testimony.

He changed the position to then simply wrap your legs around his hips, to move over you and plummet his cock in you at a harder and rougher pace. “Give it to me kuna. All of it.” The pleading was going straight from his head to his dick. “Yeah? Want me to shoot all up in this nasty little cunt? Hmm.” The emphasis of each word was highlighted with the thrust of his hips. “Make my pretty slut’s pussy is made just for me. Right?” 

“Custom made.” He chuckles at that reply, before shoving his face in the crook of your neck and cumming in loads right inside of your cunt, which seems to have molded itself around him so well it's impossible for him to move.

Yet he manages to take his cock out mid orgasm, to then cum all over your stomach. With the last drop of cum squeezed out of him, he rubbed the cum gliding around your stomach, all over your tits. And then took the same hand to shove the leaking cum back inside your walls. 

“Don’t you look the nicest with my cum on you, brat?”

GOJO SATORU જ⁀➴ ♡ let me show how to use your legs

No one could beat Gojo Satoru’s valentine's game. He starts with the 7th and honestly the endless shower of gifts, flowers, hugs, and kisses never really stop. 

So when on the 14th he wakes you up way too early in the morning and makes you spend the entire day out, a little suspicion does arise. Because who is gojo Satoru if not a morning cuddle (& sex) fiend? But you don't think too hard about what he might be getting in your apartment as you two roam around different cafes and shops. 

The answer was mirrors. When you came home at the end of the day, you were glad to not find anything out of place, so you just straight up asked him about it. And to answer your question, he simply led you to your bedroom and when you didn't find anything new anywhere, he came to stand behind you and lifted up your chin with two fingers to look up at the ceiling.

Where the image of your and your boyfriend's reflection, reflected back at you. 

“Mirror sex but better sweets, happy valentine's day.”

You were on top of Satoru, riding him into the dawn, as he stared at your figure going up and down in his cock; into the mirrors above you two. Your head was thrown back, facing upwards, which made things better for him. His tongue was out of his mouth, panting like a pavlovian dog, at the sight of your tits bouncing. 

“Turn around angel. Lemme do the rest.” He turned you to have your back face him, while he sat up to make you bite on your earlobe and thrust his hips up. 

Even with his hips gyrating through your walls at a precise and familiar, but oddly more rougher, pace—his eyes were only focused on your reflection. Sitting right on top of him, one of your hands tangled up in his hair and the other on his hand which was running over your clit. The reflection in the mirror had a similar o-shaped open mouth on, with your head thrown back on his shoulder and body completely melting into his. Your chest heaving up at a more rushed pace, making your tits bounce along them.

“Aren’t you just so glad your perfect boyfriend gave you another perfect valentine's day? Hmm.” His tongue slid around the dents in your ear, “god I am getting a house made of mirrors and fucking you all over it.” 

“That.i-is simply so, so, i- impractical, toru.” The moans and whimpers kind of choked in your throat with the loss of breath, over his hips denting up your cervix. “Hmmm. Then I guess this will do, for now.” 

He laid back down on the bed with your body still on top of him, the entirety of your naked glory,reflecting back in the mirror. The shape of his reddened cock sliding in and out of your glistening pussy, the entrance of your cunt eagerly swallowing him in, and your clit all puffy and swollen, in between in fingers—he is burning the entire thing in his retina. 

“Look at you sweets. Could put the entire porn industry to shame.” He got a hold of your face, making you look up at your own reflection— leaning into his body, and getting railed into beyond by his cock. His blue eyes were practically glowing and staring right back at you with hooded eyes, hungry for more than what he's already been served. And it was enough to make you come undone on Satoru. Gushing around his dick, splatter of your cum going here and there with his constantly moving hips. And Satoru was more than satisfied with his purchase to have introduced him to the new wonderful sights of your body. 

“Let's hope you're well hydrated, you'll be needing it, sweets.”

TO FIND MORE OF MY WORKS CLICK HERE.

highkey i wanna know everyone's faves cause i do not think these were very 'omg yay valentine's day' trope of me.

tag list: @madamechrissy @cuntphoric @cuntyji @aishi-toru @arcanarix @naomigojo @gojosperms @rriwyu @indiewritesxoxo @sys-oa-main @undercvrfan444 @ineedbetterhobbies0809

A/n: header from Yamada-kun to Lv999 no Koi wo Suru and dividers by @/cafekitsune & @/strangergraphics-archive. putting out something nasty before high school gojo which is just fluff and pining (it's killing me). choso one got really nasty ahem (insane about my babyboy). musician geto comeback as promised, he is going to be a reoccurring character on my blog me thinks, but what would ik :p not like i have any control over my writings or blog

sorry but i have been feeling like shit since exams ended and doing the last week of my internship.

!!!TMI TIME!!!

me when i got myself all hot and bothered writing about musician geto and thought it wouldn't happen again for the rest of them (it happened again):

had to take breaks in between all of them to gather myself. i want these men so bad it's honestly not funny. hope you guys had fun reading, no idea if i did a good job writing down what i pictured in my head.

[sinstear]

ㅤI KINDA WANNA KISS YOUR GIRLFRIEND IF YOU DON’T MIND

tags; 18+, established ellabs relationship, loser!abby, sub!abby, dom!reader, dom!ellie (kinda), cocky!reader, fingering (a!receiving) needy abby, mutual pining between 3 fuckin’ idiots who don’t want to admit they like each other to be honest, smoking, dirty talk, spitting, nipple play. wrote this 3 times 😃 so if i’m missing some stuff, soz!

You’ve been Ellie’s best friend since you could practically walk, curse like a sailor at a random person in the street if they looked at you funny, and break anything you could find. Abby, who’s been dating Ellie for almost 2 years, wonders if Ellie had ever felt anything other than friendship with you. She wonders if she looks at you in the way Abby finds herself doing. Was it wrong? So wrong to look at someone who isn’t her girlfriend? Maybe but she wasn’t going to tell Ellie that. No.

It probably only started after times Ellie had asked you to pick Abby up from work because she herself was working, and maybe if you hadn’t given her that stupid fucking lazy smile you’d give her whenever she would grumble under her breath at your loud music every single time you did pick her up, then maybe she wouldn’t steal glances at you. Even when her girlfriend was with her.

If Ellie picked up on it, she sure as hell never mentioned it to Abby or You. Ellie was good. If she notices something, she doesn’t say anything until Abby brings it up first. They got each other like that.

Since getting with Abby, Ellie never really moved out from the apartment she shared with you. Her girlfriend spends more time there than she does at her own place so it always made sense this way. You were never a third wheel per say, you enjoyed both their company; even if you were a grumpy asshole most of the time.

You also loved to pretend to be annoyed at the fact they would always wake you up. Acting like it bothered you, but when breakfast came, Abby would be a blushing, flustered mess when you would mock how she sounds. Ellie would sit on the other side of the couch, drinking her coffee and smirking subtly.

Ellie’s sitting on her— your bed, Abby slumped between her legs with her head resting on the brunette’s chest comfortably. She’s reading one of her books, Ellie isn’t sure which one, just knows it’s one from her huge collection and she slowly threads her fingers through the Blonde hair, tugging strands lightly.

“Stop hoggin it,” Abby murmurs, reaching a hand up behind her. “S’my turn.”

Rolling her eyes, Ellie pulls the joint from between her lips and carefully passes it to Abby, slipping it between her fingers and shoving her other hand under her girlfriend’s shirt. The action causes Abby to shiver and wrap her lips around the joint before inhaling.

Both of them are able to share the joint a few more times until the sound of the bathroom door is unlocking, and you walk out freshly showered hair wet and a loose pair of sweatpants hang loosely around your hips with a little too tight shirt on. Of course Abby notices that.

“Can you guys go five minutes without fuckin on my bed’? I bet you’ve both fucked twice since I went in the shower,” you grumbled as you stepped out of the bathroom and into the bedroom.

Ellie snorts under her breath, eyebrow slightly raising. “Told you that you’re welcome to join.”

As you move around your room, you glance over and find Abby’s eyes fluttering closed with each puff she takes, and a subtle grin appears on your lips. “Nah, think you guys would enjoy that too much— is that my shirt?”

“Relax, she needed a new one.” Ellie scoffed.

“Wasn’t gonna say anything, looks good,” You nodded, dropped your towel on the floor and made your way back over to the bed. “Are you gonna share or?”

Abby’s eyes snap open and lock with yours quickly when she finally takes notice of you being a lot closer than you originally were. “No,” She smirked playfully, dropped her book beside her and shook her head. “Don’t feel like it.”

“Oh? You don’t?” You laughed, cocking your head to the side with a soft tut. “Ellie, does your girl not have manners?”

“Only sometimes,” Ellie murmured against Abby’s neck, and snuck her hand back up the shirt. “She doesn’t like to share joints with many people.”

Eyeing her up closely, a deep hum emitted from the back of your throat. “Yeah, I can see that, dickhead,” You scowled and held your hand out. “But I bought the weed, therefore you’re smoking my stuff.”

Blowing the smoke in your face, Abby giggles with a gentle eye roll and passes it to you this time, shivering and softly whimpering when Ellie’s hand cups one of her tits. None of you are seemingly embarrassed by this. Or you chose to ignore Abby’s flushed cheeks.

“Please don’t fuck on my bed again,” You sighed, watching how Ellie practically gropes Abby right before your eyes and not having a single ounce of shame.

“Abby likes when people watch,” Ellie admitted, biting back a laugh when Abby scoffs. “Right, you like when she watches.” Just like that her eyes snap open again and she’s caught. Shit.

“What?” Abby chokes out.

“S’cute,” You started, taking another hit and chuckling. “Think we don’t know, but we do,”

“Know what?”

“Your little staring problem. You think I don’t notice the way you stare a little too long? Especially when it’s just you and me. M’surprised you haven’t drooled over yourself yet.”

“That’s not—”

“So you haven’t thought about it before?”

Ellie’s silently watching from behind, smirking and pushing the shirt up higher, Abby’s perky nipples on display before you can blink. “T..Thought about what?” She mumbles, eyes not leaving yours.

Her lips part and pupils are blown slightly wide when you kneel on the bed and the joint is still between your lips. “You’ve never thought about me fucking you?”

The question hangs in the air, her skin is covered in goosebumps, you’ve got her right where you want her that she seems to only be focused on you. So focused that Ellie manages to get the shirt off her without a problem. “Do you, Baby?” Ellie finally speaks and it’s soft against her ear. “Do you think about her fucking you?”

Placing the joint in the ashtray, your attention doesn’t waver from Abby. It’s always on her for fuck sake, you’ve stole your own glances at her when Ellie’s not here, when she’s in your apartment, wearing your clothes that Ellie lent her. Fuck.

“S..Sometimes.” Abby admitted with a moan, heat pooling between her legs and she doesn’t have the balls to admit just how wet she is right now.

“Ellie?”

“What?”

“Can I kiss her?” The question is innocent and Abby’s heart swells at how softly you ask. Your hand rests on her thigh, eyes roaming her face slowly and that stupid grin would have her melting into a puddle if she was stood up and not lying down.

Abby’s cheeks flush at the feeling of Ellie’s smile against her neck, and the vibration of her laugh sends her into a frenzy. “Do you want her to kiss you?”

She doesn’t miss a beat. “Yes.”

You’re suddenly so much closer to her face, so close that she can see the way your pupils are blown too. Was it the weed? Was it something else? Abby wasn’t sure, but with Ellie’s fingers pinching and rolling her nipples, and your breath against her face, she couldn’t focus. “You want it?” You asked, fingers gripping her chin.

“Uh huh,” Abby nodded, arching against Ellie’s chest at a certain pinch.

“You want it?”

“Please?”

You press your lips to hers, and Abby melts into you with a gentle sigh. She didn’t expect for your lips to be so perfect and soft against hers, maybe it’s because of all the times she catches you using lip balm or some stupid shit you saw on the internet, either way, she doesn’t care. Not when your free hand reaches up and cups the side of her face and kisses her just a little harder. Ellie watches from behind and her stomach flutters and her cunt clenches around nothing at the sight. At the sounds you were easily pulling from her girlfriend.

Whimpering into your mouth suddenly, Abby grips your hand and pushes it downwards abruptly. Pulling away just slightly, you ignored the whine she let out and laughed at how wet she was. “Weed makes you fuckin’ horny, huh?”

Makes her horny all the time, why do you think she’s always riding my cock like a slut?” Ellie piped up, biting and sucking her neck harshly. “Bet you could just slip your fingers right in, always so wet.”

“Want me to fuck you?” You whispered against her lips, squeezing and gripping her thigh. Abby’s quick to nod while you simply tutted again. “Words, Baby.”

“Yes, want you to fuck me,” She whimpered quietly and lifted her hips up at your patting of her hip. Licking her lips and looking away bashfully when you’re pulling down her sweatpants and her boxers, she suddenly feels embarrassed at the noticeable wet patch on the fabric.

“Makes you horny alright,” You murmured and threw her clothes somewhere behind you. Your eyes find Ellie, and for a few seconds you just stare at each other. “Is this okay?”

“It’s okay with me, Abs are you okay?”

“Yes, yes, just— please,” She sighed, legs falling open on their own accord and her cunt glistened with slick before you. “Need you to fuck me, please, please.”

“Someone’s needy,” You commented.

Before Abby could respond to your words, your lips were already back on hers, kissing her hungrily. Your teeth nipped at her bottom lip, hands running up and down her thighs and she shivered. Blunt nails sunk into the skin and Abby whines pathetically at both yours and Abby’s touch. “Such a needy slut,” Ellie murmurs into her neck, fingertips pinching harder at her nipples. “Need to always be full, hm?”

Your thumb finds her clit, and Abby pulls away with a soft whimper, a string of spit keeping the two of you together as her eyes flutter closed and arches into you. “So wet,” You murmured, kissing up and down her jaw. You rub slow circles on her clit, and smile against her skin at her jolts. “Sensitive too.”

“I bet,” Ellie laughed, reaching her hand up and tilting Abby’s head back by her chin. “Only fucked her this morning—”

“Could hear you,” You scoffed, dipping your fingers down and slipping them between her soaked folds, slick coating your fingers embarrassingly quick. “Sound so pretty when you moan,” Your lips brushed against her ear and Abby whined. “So pretty when you’re getting fucked.”

Abby’s eyes fluttered open at your words, cheeks flushed and heart hammering in her chest, to find Ellie already looking down at her with a smirk on her lips and her thumb stroked her cheek slowly. “Open your mouth for me, baby,” She asked, moving her fingers and tapping her lips. “Be a good girl for us, yeah?”

Obediently, Abby opens her mouth and Ellie lowers her face down a little more. You watched the sight silently, fingers still rubbing faster and harsher circles on her clit, and you licked your lips hungrily as Ellie held her mouth open by her chin, and spat a glob of spit into her waiting mouth. Just as she went to swallow, the brunette locked her in a harsh kiss and Abby moaned into her mouth when you’re sinking two of your fingers into her cunt. Her hand grasped your wrist tightly and the other held onto Ellie’s knee tightly.

“So tight,” You growled at the feeling of her walls clamping tightly around your fingers. Abby’s hand grips your wrist harder, hips wildy bucking up into your touch as your fingers brush and curl against her velvet walls perfectly.

Pulling away with a smack of wet lips, Ellie grinned down at Abby’s flushed face, wiped the spit from the corners of her lips with her thumb, and slid her other hand down her stomach. “Look so pretty,” She murmurs softly. “Pretty when you’re stuffed full and being a good girl.”

“More,” Abby whimpered, grinding against your fingers, taking them deeper with each thrust. Her back arches against Ellie’s chest, pushing more up into you when your lips find her neck; where you kiss, bite and suck harshly. “Fuck.”

Your lips curl into a smile at her whimpers, and you barely notice Ellie moving her hand down between Abby’s legs until she gasps loudly and holds your wrist with an iron grip. “This what you wanted? Me playing with your pretty clit while she fucks you?”

“Yes— fuck, please.” Abby chants pathetically.

Littering kisses up and down her neck, another curl of your fingers has her letting go of your wrist and wrapping an arm around your neck, pulling you closer to her. “You think about me when you fuck yourself?” You found yourself muttering into her skin, working your fingers in and out of her with vigor. “Hm?”

The way her cunt clenches around your fingers, and clit throbs beneath Ellie’s thumb at your question is an answer for both of you and it has your heart hammering in your chest. “Course you do, pussy’s made for my fingers, ain’t she?” You’re purposely Pissing Ellie off, and it works when you hear her grumbling behind Abby. “Don’t worry, baby, my cock will be perfect for you.”

Abby gasps, but she’s not sure if it’s the way you’re fucking her so good, or your words that has her flushed and wrecked, but she doesn’t seem to care. Especially not when you lift your head from her neck, lean your face closer to hers and brush your lips against her pink plump ones. “Look so pretty for me, so beautiful while you ride my fingers like a whore,” You smiled. Smiled like you didn’t have your fingers reaching parts she couldn’t even reach.

It usually takes Abby a while to get to where she wants, but when she feels the tightening of her lower stomach, the familiar feeling rising, she closes her legs around your wrist, shamelessly grinding against your fingers. “M’gonna cum,” She whines, eyes fluttering open and closed a couple of times before they find yours again. “Need to cum,”

“Yeah?” You cocked your head to the side, looked down where Ellie had one of her hands on her thighs, keeping it apart and hummed at the sight of her fingers against Abby’s clit. “Gonna cum for me or her?”

“Please—”

“Who are you gonna cum for? Me or her?” You asked again, speeding up your fingers. “C’mon baby, tell me who you’re gonna cum for.”

The loud squelching sounds had the blood rushing to her head, the thumping in her ears louder and Abby’s lips parted with a loud whimper when you’re brushing that spot that makes her toes curl. “You! M’gonna cum for you, please.”

“Yeah? Go on then, cum for me.”

That’s all it took for her body to tense up, like your words were the only things she needed to hear, as her back arches, body arching into you, her gasps come out in short breaths and cums against your fingers with a pathetic whine. The gush of sticky spray covering your wrist makes you grin down at her smugly. “Fuck, made you squirt, huh? Definitely need to do that again, angel,” You murmured, leaning down and kissing her lips with a soft moan of your own. “You’re so pretty when you cum.”

As Abby came down from her high, your fingers buried to a hilt, still inside her, your lips found her ear again and your eyes locked with Ellie’s lustful ones as you spoke. “You’re gonna ride my cock while we show your girlfriend how to fuck her girl right, yeah?”

[monstersflashlight]

Lusty for love

A/N: Happy Valentine's Day!

Cupid (monster) x fem!witch reader || sex pollen, (light) dub con, breeding, oral sex, dirty talk, praise kink

You were stupid. A bit more stupid than normal at least.

You were trying to get some new potions to work when you accidentally spilled the pink powder he gifted you specially for lust potions. The pink powder was obtained from the cupid species, they produced it on their wings and any human or monster would instantly fall into a lustful frenzy once they touched it. And that’s why it was so hard to get, they had to give it to you specifically with a very clear intent of lust...

Your cupid friend gave it to you as a birthday present, and you were supposed to drop an itty bitty quantity in each potion because every time someone used the powder, he would feel it. You promised not to use much, always controlling how many potions you’d make… But you weren’t expecting for it to slip your fingers and pretty much cover your whole body. Your skin was tingling and your brain was barely coherent when you dialed his number.

“I need your help,” you whispered against the speaker, not letting him even say hello.

His response was instantaneous: “What happened?” You could hear him batting his wings in the background, and you were sure he was already mid air coming to get you. He must have felt the powder activating.

“I- I dropped the pink powder on me,” you confessed, your breathing labored and your skin tingly.

Fuck, you were about to burst and you didn’t even move. You’d never felt such intensity before, it was like every inch of your body was electrified and caressed at the same time, even the touch of the clothes over your body felt erotic.

“Fuck,” he cursed. The air against the phone was enough to know he was rushing to your house, his wings almost deafening in the background.

“Please, please…” You barely made sense, your brain was fuzzy in a way that made your clit tingle and your panties were so wet you could already feel your juices ruining your pants.

“Fuck,” he cursed again. In other circumstances you would have blushed, your unrequited crush on your cupid best friend making you feel all kinds of emotions. But you weren’t thinking straight, and he was talking again: “I’ll be there in a few minutes, take your clothes off, rub your pretty little clit until you are dripping wet because as soon as I cross your window I’m going to be inside of you, and I won’t stop until you are dripping with my come for every single hole.”

His words drove your brain into a frenzy, the effect of the pink powder getting even stronger as you did as you were told, pulling at your clothes so fast and hard you broke something. You didn’t care, you’d deal with whatever tore later on. You laid on your potions table, not caring about everything falling down or the million little pieces of glass that were probably on the ground, you had only one focus: obey. Your fingers found your clit and you started rubbing rapidly, moaning against the phone.

“You sound so sweet, good damn it. I knew you’d be perfect,” his words meant nothing and all at the same time, your inside twisting and turning as your pussy contracted over nothing, making you whine and beg. “I know, love, I know.” You could hear him breathing hard, the powder probably affecting him too, and with each movement of his wings you could feel him getting closer.

The second your window opened with a big crash, you were begging for him and he was falling to his knees next to the table, not caring about the glass, grabbing your ankles and pulling your legs as far apart as possible. He set his big body between them, his wings so wide and soft you felt the tickle against your knees when he pushed your legs over his shoulders.

The first contact of his tongue against your tender flesh feels like lightning hitting your body. And it only turned better when his dexterous tongue found your clit. He ate you out like a starving monster, fucking in and out of your pussy with his forked tongue until you were screaming his name and asking for more. More. More.

You came in less than two minutes, with his fingers pressing against your G-spot and your brain turning into jelly inside your head. It was so much and so little at the same time. You needed more. You needed him inside of you in any way you could. You pushed your torso up, pulling your legs off his shoulders and shoved his chest back until he was a few feet back. You jumped off the table, not even feeling the tiny glasses on the ground as you walked over them.

It was like your orgasm only made you hornier, more desperate, you needed him more than you needed your next breath. “Let me suck you off, please, please…” You begged, your eyes fixated on his dick straining against his pants.

You fumbled with the zipper, and he helped you, looking at you with such tenderness that your heart was about to explore out of your chest. But first: dick.

“Okay, love. Okay. Whatever you want. You can do whatever you want to me.” His words sounded like a promise, and your brain was so fuzzy you could only nod as you fell to your knees. “Open up,” he ordered, taking himself on his hand and caressing your cheek with the other. He fed you his cock and you swallowed it down greedily. “That’s it, such a good witch for me, such a pretty mouth wrapped around my shaft. Fuck, do that again.”

You rolled your tongue over his head, pressing against the underside where you knew he was most sensitive. That cupid anatomy book coming in handy when you were wrapping your hand at his base and squeezing until you felt the ridges inside move. He cursed over you, his hand grabbing your hair so harshly you felt the tiny spikes of pain, but that only made you moan louder around him.

He cursed again, telling you nonsense as he moved his dick in and out of your mouth slightly. “Fuck, your mouth, love. You are perfect. You are so good to me. I’ve been wanting to have you like this forever. Good goddess, your mouth.” You grabbed his ass, trying to get him closer, further down your throat, but he stopped you. “None of that, I… I need you. I need to be inside of you. After that you can play with me all you want.”

“I’ll hold you to that,” your voice was airy and low, and without a doubt you knew your whole body was pink all over.

He helped you to your feet, claiming your mouth in a brain melting kiss before grabbing your ass and helping you back onto the table. His fingers found your pussy at the same time he positioned himself on your opening. “You are so wet, fuck.” He pushed the tip inside, and you were indeed so wet he slipped right in.

He cursed in so many languages you weren’t sure how many words he said, but you were in heaven. You reached Valhalla or whatever other heaven there existed out there. All at once. None at all… You touched the stars and came back to your body when he moved his hips back, pushing right back in and drawing a scream out of your lungs.

And then there was no more playing, only frantic fucking and dirty words.

“Do you like me, love? Do you like the feel of my cock inside of you? Do you like when I say dirty things to you?” You shivered, nodding frantically as you rolled your hips, chasing some of the pleasure he was promising you with his thrusts. “Of course you do, you love to be fucked this hard, this fast… You never had it so good, did you? None of your stupid boyfriends was as good as me. Say it.”

“None were… None as good as you…” Your voice was trembling, his thrusts too fast and harsh, but you couldn’t complain. You wouldn’t. It was that good.

“I know darling, I know nobody was as good as me. But you didn’t let me tell you that, did you? You were always with one or another, never enough time for me to fuck you as you deserved. To treat you as you deserve. To make you fucking mine,” he punctuated each word with a hard thrust that hit right over your G-spot, sending sparks of desire and pleasure to your brain until you were drooling over the table. “Tell me I’m wrong, tell me you don’t like me like that and I’ve been pining over you for nothing,” his anger was palpable in each thrust of his hips inside your pussy, his ridges undulating and massaging you from the inside.

“I CAN’T. I CAN’T. YOU ARE RIGHT!” You screamed as another wave of pleasure washes over your body.

But he wasn’t listening to you, he was too focused on his actions, on driving you insane. “You can’t because you like me. You’ve liked me as long as I’ve liked you and you’ve been denying us both. For what? For some flimsy human dick? No more, love. You don’t go back to anyone else anymore. You. Are. Mine. To. Please.”

“Yours. Yours. Yours…”

And then there’s fireworks behind your eyelids and your brain is short circuiting. You could barely hold your body up as he expanded his dick inside of you, the cupid trick of locking inside your tight pussy was multiplied by a thousand because of the pink dust, and you could only scream silently as he bred you to the brim and your vision turned white behind your eyelids.

You came back to your body resting over his chest, the soft feathers tickling your cheek as you looked down at his wet dick, still half hard. Your body still craved him, and you were about to act on it when he said: “For what’s worth… I really like you like that, too, love,” he whispered against your sweaty forehead, his breathing labored as his dick twitched in your line of sight.

You threw a leg over his middle, rubbing your still dripping pussy over his dick. “Prove it.”

And he did.

(He was also true to his promise to leave you leaking and bred from every single hole, but that’s a story for another day...)

[sobbingscripter]

Tags: [mlw][mdni][childhood friends][semi-public][cowgirl][oral (f! receiving][female orgasm][reunited][he's got anxiety][romantic][raw][fingering][implied facial][suggested creampie, if that's even a tag]

Jason's not the type of man to get giddy.

Not by a longshot.

In fact, he's not even the type of man to look in the direction of a woman, just because he knows that he'd need to find a girl who's big backed enough to carry his emotional baggage and he's not ready to burden someone with that.

Clearing away his thoughts, Jason takes a step into the one part of Gotham he wouldn't deem as a total shitshow.

The public library.

Walls are strewn with red paper hearts on string, tablecloths are changed to heart prints and there's a gigantic, glittery Cupid cutout right above the librarian's desk. And with each breeze, it dangles and Jason can't hide the amusement in his eyes when the flying baby spins, arrow in his direction. And he scoffs under his breath.

Before moving towards the front desk and he feels the way his breath stutters in his chest at the sight of you.

"Where's Beatrice? Old, short lady, curlers, mole with the hair?" He's damn near frantic. He's not prepared for this.

Pretty hair framing your face, a bright red bow in your hair and sparkling eyes that stare up at him, and your pretty, pouty lips curl at the corners.

"Oh, she's out for a few months. She got her hip surgery, so I'm her temporary replacement." You give him the sweetest smile, staring at him from beneath long, luxurious lashes that could almost rival Bruce's and Jason swallows, nodding his head.

"I—uh— I'm...— excuse me."

Jason leaves through the same door he came in, muscular hands braced on his hips and he lets out laboured breaths. If someone were to accuse him of being a blushing mess, he wouldn't even be able to deny it, instead, only being able to empty his Glock.

Because no one accuses the Red Hood of feeling feelings.

Carding muscular fingers through his hair, Jason tries to hype himself up, trying to give a pep talk that doesn't involve internal screaming and a potential panic attack.

He doesn't understand why HIS Selina Kyle needs to be working at the library he frequents. It seems like a sick joke.

Especially because you probably don't even remember him. Because not only was he like, 10, but he was also, masked whenever you two came across each other.

Quite literally, his first everything.

First solo save.

First crush.

First Valentine.

First kiss.

First fantasy.

First boner.

Jason steps back into the library, his boots heavy on the carpeted floorboards and he steps to the front desk, his chest puffed and a purpose in his voice.

"I'm Jason." He introduces. "I read to the kids on Wednesdays and Fridays."

He watches you glance towards the clipboard in front of you, glossy lips pursed before you nod your head, giving him that exact smile that used to be painted on the forefront of his brain for majority of his adolescence.

"Yeah, Beatrice told me about you." Your head tilts, and you give him that sweet, lovely leer you've always had.

"You're 'tall fella'." And you introduce yourself, before handing him the pen to sign in. A pretty fountain pen, patterned with hearts and he signs the notepad, adding the exact time as well. 12:13pm.

Jason passes into the library, immediately met with the excited squeals of kids no higher than his hip, and he glances at the multiple tables, colourful chairs occupied by excitement incarnate.

"Okay, okay." Jason hums, before sitting on his seat. A bright red wingback, although, the back of it is covered in snowy lace, undoubtedly for the occasion and he places his hands on his knees.

"What books are on today's list?"

˚˖𓍢ִִ໋❤️་༘🎀˚˖𓍢ִ🌹˚.

Jason's halfway through his 9th 'happily ever after' before he glances towards the doorway, your form leaning against the doorframe as you listen intently. Although your attention isn't as much on him, as it is on the children scattered in front of him, wide-eyed stares as though they've never heard the fairy tales before.

The softest and most gentle smile remains planted on your lips, cheeks rosy and brows relaxed, and your arms are crossed over your chest. Before you glance towards him.

Overing him an even sweeter smile.

And Jason stumbles over his words, before his lips purse, and he feels the way his ears burn with embarassment.

"Oooooh, he's shy." A tiny voice calls out and is immediately followed by a flurry of 'ooh's.

And they're right. He is shy.

But he also cannot empty his Glock.

And Jason glances towards you, or at least attempts to, because right above your head, there's another fucking Cupid pointing an arrow at him. And his fist clenches in annoyance at the convenience of the smirking infant, ruddy cheeks and tiny wings that, speaking aerodynamically, should definitely not be able to lift that chubby body higher than a foot or two.

Jason lets out a deep, controlled breath before lowering his gaze to meet yours, pretty doe eyes stare at him with the intensity of a thousand suns and his compression shirt seems a bit too stuffy right now. But he doesn't tear his gaze away.

At least not immediately, because once your pretty lashes flutter when you blink, he looks away. To the complete opposite direction of you.

"You've been reading for a while, so I wanted to ask if you want a juice box?" You offer him sweetly and God, he feels like a pervert because he wants your juice box.

Your sweet, tantalizing and snug juice box.

"Please." He damn near breathes out the word, and you nod your head, carrying in a tray with multiple juice boxes, as well as snacks. Sliced fruit in labelled bowls, incase something isn't immediately identifiable, chips, raisins, cookies.

And Jason looks at the juice box you place in his hand.

Pineapple.

He doesn't know if he's being paranoid, but it's a bit on the nose, but he slides the straw into the hole, unable to hide the snicker that tumbles from his lips at the sight.

And you let out a snort. "Perv."

God.

You even laugh the same.

˚˖𓍢ִִ໋❤️་༘🎀˚˖𓍢ִ🌹˚.

When the library empties out, you're left all alone with Jason, golden light streams into the library, although, it's dimmed by the frosted glass windows, and Jason clears his throat.

"Shouldn't you be heading home?" He questions you softly, absentmindedly picking up books that have been scattered across the tables and he sets them back into their places on the shelves. The actions so practiced and familiar, that it leads you to believe he's reading to these kids for far longer than you originally thought.

"I still need to update the system as to which books were taken, so, that'll take a bit." You respond with a sweet hum, clearing out the bowls and empty juice boxes from the tables and wiping them down.

You're methodical.

He likes that.

You've always been methodical. When it came to putting bandaids on his scuffed and knobby knees, when it came to speedily mending his cape before Bruce could find out.

Although looking back on it, Bruce could probably tell.

The lime green thread wasn't too difficult to spot against the shade of his cape, but he just never mentioned it.

"You don't have Valentine's Day plans?" You question him this time, glancing at Jason over your shoulder as you begin to take down the bulk of the worst of the decorations. Mainly the Cupid's. And the origami flowers that dangle from the corners of the room and he shakes his head.

"Not a big fan of Valentine's Day."

"You've never had a good Valentine's Day?" You hum softly, pausing your motions to stare at Jason while he continues to reorganize the shelves, and you get the honour of watching the muscles of his back flex and move with every motion.

"I had like, one." He hums softly. "When I was younger."

"You wanna have another one?"

˚˖𓍢ִִ໋❤️་༘🎀˚˖𓍢ִ🌹˚.

There's something so stupidly romantic about the way the two of you are seated next to each other, a packet of chocolate chip cookies between and conversation flowing like water from a river.

And Jason doesn't know if it's the way the flame of the scented candle reflects in your iris, or if it's the way you thumb away the crumbs from the corner of his mouth or if it's even the way you compliment the colour of his eyes.

But he leans in, impulsive and stupid, but he leans in, his lips ghosting over yours in a sweet peck.

And you stare up at him, eyes wide and brows raised in surprise before a smile spreads across your face. Wide and dimpled, before you place a manicured hand on the side of his face, leaning in and you whisper so softly, just before your lips meet his.

"If it isn't the Boy Wonder."

Jason wastes no time in pulling you into his lap, your thighs pressed against his waist as your hands cradle his face so sweetly, thumbs brushing across his cheekbones as his hands find your waist. Warm, rough palms pressed against the skin of your waist and he pulls you closer.

He doesn't need to say he missed you. He doesn't need to say that you were the only person he wanted to see after the Lazarus pit.

Jason pulls away, pressing soft, sweet kisses along the curve of your jaw, lingering on your erratic pulse and your nails scratch at his scalp, carding through thick, wavy locks. Your head tips back, trying to give him the maximum amount of access to the sensitive flesh as your hips roll needily.

And your lips part to let out a shaky breath, lashes flutter and you whine softly, glossy lips letting out sweet moans that fill his ears, just like that sweet, lingering perfume on your skin fills his nose.

It's all too much.

Too much and not enough.

The way you grind against the bulge in his pants does nothing to sate that burning feeling in the pit of his belly, but the way your thighs press against his waist, as if you're trying to pull him closer.

That.

That does it for him.

It feels like a fucking dream when you hop up on the table, thighs parted and he watches the way your slick forces your pretty panties clinging to your cunt. Outlining the pretty folds and puffy lips, and he groans under his breath, his head moving to rest against the plush flesh of your thigh.

"You're so perfect." He breathes out. "Can I?"

Jason asks you softly, even as his fingers hook around the soaked gusset of your panties, pulling it to the side and clingy gossamers of your slick snap against his fingertips. And he whines when you lift your skirt better, thighs moving to rest on his broad shoulders and his face is nestled between your thighs.

Jason's tongue drags through your slippery folds, wet muscle gathering the stickiness of your slick before he groans at the taste, lunging the glob at the hood of your clit, before he circles the sensitive nub with mastered precision.

He feels the way your pillowy thighs press against his blazing ears, sweet sounds slipping past your lips as your nails scratch at his scalp, fingers massaging his head as your hips lift to meet the curls and flicks of his tongue.

Meaty hands paw at your thighs, and Jason pulls away occasionally, just to press sloppy, wet kisses against your skin, glancing up at you through his lashes as you push his hair out of your face. Right at that snowy tuft, and all the way to the nape of his neck, and Jason could fucking paint the inside of his pants when your nails dig into the flesh of his neck, pulling his face back to your cunt.

"You taste so fucking good..."

One of your hands support your weight on the surface of the table, your head tipped back and hickeys littered across the expanse of your neck and your eyes are half-lidded, moans falling from your lips with the kind of ease that only comes with unbridled and unfiltered lust.

But Jason knows it's not lust.

And if he didn't know it before, he definitely knows it when you pull him away from your cunt, his chin and lips glistening with slick and you lean down, pressing a sweet yet sloppy kiss against his lips.

Before you usher him back below your skirt.

And he sucks at your needy clit, feeling the way your hips buck and twitch, slick coating his lips, his tongue as well as his chin. And thick fingers dig into the fat of your thighs as he laps at whatever trickles from your sloppy hole.

And Jason brings up a hand, pushing your thigh further from his ear, before sliding two fingers into your drooling cunt, feeling the way you spasm around his digits, your belly caving inward and you whine.

"You're so tight..." Jason breathes out, tongue flicking against your overstimulated clit, just as his fingers curl against that spongy spot that makes your eyes flutter shut. "And you're so warm..."

You whine, your body breaking out in goosebumps and you can barely give a warning before you're coming on Jason's fingers, feeling the way he keeps sucking on your clit, coaxing a damn near screaming orgasm from you and your thighs wrap around his head.

And only when you let him up, does he let out panting breaths, before slumping back in his seat, carding his fingers through his hair. And he looks up to you with hazy green eyes.

And you barely wait before you're fiddling with his belt buckle, trying to unzip his charcoal coloured cargo pants, and he lets out a hoarse laugh, before helping you undo the loop and he shifts, just enough to pull his cock out.

And it's so pretty.

Long, thick, beads of precum trickling down that pretty upward curve and pooling just above his cock, flushed red tip weeping and twitching.

And you swallow.

Wrapping a hand around the base of him, and you give Jason a few slow, tentative pumps, watching the way deep breaths escape his lips.

"Ride me." Jason sighs, a soft whimper leaving him. "Please ride me."

Jason whines when your hips meet his, his cock nestled so firmly in your gooey walls, your cunt pulsing around his cock, your arms wrapping around his neck and your face tucked in the crook of his shoulder.

And his hands bracket your hips, fingers kneading the fatty globes of your ass, as his hips tilt upwards, rotund tip pressing against your cervix so sweetly. And he groans, pressing the sweetest kiss against your temple.

And he whines when your hips roll against his.

The air is thick with tension, the scent of cinnamon from that candle that's still casts a pretty gold glow and the smell of his cologne.

Earthy, smoky and so, so intoxicating that it makes your eyes roll back in your head, your nails digging into the back of his neck.

Your hips roll, the plumpness of your ass meeting his thighs in rhythmic movements and Jason's pretty sure the Lazarus pit was bullshit and he's actually dead right now.

Because you're so fucking heavenly.

The sluttiest squelchy sounds ring out from your pretty cunt, and you keep slobbering around his cock, as he bullies your insides so eagerly. Each of his hips move to meet your sloppy movements and Jason's hands massage at your hips.

He savours the way you feel in his hands.

The last time he had you on his lap was exactly 12 days before he died. You had placed the sweetest kiss on his lips, giving him the prettiest little doe eyed gaze.

And you're doing the exact same fucking thing right now.

Bleary eyes staring up at Jason, your lips parting to let out the prettiest, sluttiest little sounds while he fucks up into you. Each ridge and each vein drags against your sloppy walls, and watching the way your brows knit into the cutest little frown.

You look so pretty.

"So fucking pretty..." Jason whines, his face buried in your neck as he moves your hips, harder, faster, meaner but so, so sweetly.

"Shit, can I come inside?" He begs softly. "Please, please, please."

He begs so prettily, his blunt nails leaving indentations in the fat of your ass, his face hidden and you can only murmur a weak 'uh-huh' as you pummels into you so...

Meanly.

Hips snapping vigorously while he keeps cooing, kissing your neck and wrapping his arms around your waist so tightly, he might break one of your ribs. His muscles bulge underneath his already tight shirt, his brows bunch and his hips still.

Jason edges himself just a bit, before whispering.

"No..."

He needs to fulfill his fantasy. He owes it to himself.

"I wanna come on your face."

Taglist:

@lucky-beheaded 🌻

@jasontoddswhitestreak 🌸

@anesthesia-4rizzle 🎀

@allycat4458 🪻

@feral010 ✨

@blckbarbiedoll 🌷

@custardpuddingprincess ⭐

@couldeatthatgirlforlunch 🦄

@theamazkngskye 🍄

@titchx0 🦆

[dyingswanpavlova]

"Your girl" - Part 18 | The Salesman x Reader

Summary: You find out why you have been feeling so sick lately. Some things are good. Some things are bad. And other things are straight-up cruel.

Warnings: dead dove do not eat, kidnapping, mentions of sexual abuse and other traumatic events in the past, numbness, helplessness, violence, threatening, mentions of blood, mentions of murder and rape, body issues, trauma talk, stockholm syndrome, forced relationship, unhealthy relationship, depression, manipulation, mentions of sexual activities and desires, mentions of pregnancy/pregnancy issues/abortion, kidney failure, poisoning, not beta-read, if I've missed any please tell me! mdni 18+!

"Your girl" - The Salesman x Reader Masterlist

The voices were so soft that you barely even heard them, but you knew they were there.

You were probably dreaming. But what were you dreaming about? What had you dreamed? Were you already fully awake – awake enough to forget what you had been dreaming about?

A sharp pain in your arm made your eyes flutter open and you glanced around in panic. It suddenly all came back again, quick and unyielding.

The blood. He had to be dead. But, God, why was he dead? And why had he followed you?

Your gaze flew around the room, helplessly trying to recognize where the hell you were, when it suddenly dawned on you. You weren’t home.

Maybe you were indeed still dreaming.

Or maybe it was a nightmare you were caught in.

You gasped loudly and tried to sit up, only to feel a pair of gentle, yet firm hands, push you back down.

“Stop, I- What-“

“Shh.” He kept you gently pressed against the bed and regarded you with a look so tender and concerned, it immediately increased your panic. “It’s okay. It’s okay. We’re in the hospital. You’re alright.”

You glanced around, only to then realize it. The white walls, the neon lights, the rustling and the people around you. One looked like a doctor, another one like a nurse, but she left quickly.

It slowly came back to you. The wardrobe. The dizziness. The god-awful amount of blood. Your first impulse was to ask him what had happened, but you kept quiet. Everything was just too much – and his expression was by far the worst about it. His brows were furrowed in concern and his eyes were soft and cautious, as if he expected you to pass out again any moment.

He hadn’t even managed to get properly changed. You still saw the faint traces of blood on his shirt, right under his jacket. And even his hands had that light, red glow of someone who had just butchered a lamb.

The faint cut right above his eyebrow was new. And it made your heart clench.

“What happened?” You whispered hoarsely. “How long was I-“

“The doctor was just about to explain.” He said as he gently squeezed one of your hands in his both. “I told him that you don’t speak Korean. He’ll explain it in English.”

Your eyelids fluttered in confusion. He was behaving so…odd.

Of course he had been gentle before, no question. But this was so entirely unlike him. He was so soft-spoken and careful. It was hardly the same man.

When the doctor cleared his throat, you snapped out of your thoughts and looked up at him instead. You were filled with dread, far more so than ever. Something was wrong, you could tell. A part of you expected him to tell you that you were going to die soon. Who knew? Maybe you would. It wouldn’t have surprised you. That was just what your life was like. Predictable and disappointing.

“We ran a few blood tests, miss, as I just now mentioned to your husband.”

Husband. The word rang in your ears.

You nodded.

The doctor, a man in his middle-age with kind eyes and a certain softness in his voice, sighed softly and slowly sat down on the chair by your bed.

“I have bad news and good ones. I would like to start with the bad news.”

You felt him tense beside you and his hold on your hands tightened ever-so-slightly.

By the time you looked up to meet his gaze, you realized, he wasn’t looking at you. Instead he was staring at the doctor before you, his eyes fixed on the man and his body rigid on his own chair.

You nodded again.

Oh God, what now?

“The reason for your breakdown was a circulatory collapse. That in itself isn’t all too bad. Your husband informed me of the fight you witnessed.” The blood on him. Clever. “That level of stress, combined with your high blood pressure, were what caused it. I ran a few blood tests and that’s where it gets complicated. I’m sorry to inform you that one of your kidneys is in the process of failing.”

You felt a sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach. You had always known this would come someday. But you couldn’t help but ask.

“The slow one or the other one?” You asked quietly.

You felt him stiffen beside you and the pressure on your hand was almost painful by now. He stared at you with an incredulous look. “What do you mean the slow one?”

You found yourself staring at the doctor instead. Maybe you should have told him, you suddenly realized.

The doctor kept staring between the both of you, before he hesitantly settled his gaze on you again, after you just so openly ignored your husband, waiting for his answer.

“I think your wife is referring to her birth defect. She was born with a kidney that’s rather small and has a hard time keeping up the process of cleaning her blood, as while the other one is normal in size. But unfortunately, that’s not the one failing.”

You closed your eyes. “So, the good one.”

“That’s the thing. I noticed something about it. I found your blood levels concerning, so I ran a few more tests. There’s a lot of protein in your urine. Have you had a history of using the bathroom often?”

“Yes.” You said quietly. “But it was always like that.”

“Did it lessen over the years?”

That made you pause and you took a moment to actually think about it. Looking back, as a child, you had to use the bathroom at least every hour. But these last few years…

“Yes, I think so. Why?”

He nodded with a solemn expression on his face. “I assumed so. I have a bad idea about what might be going on. I’m sorry to say this, but neither of your kidneys was working properly. They were just barely keeping you alive at this point.”

“Wait.” His voice was so soft that you barely even heard it, but it was enough to make the doctor’s head snap up.

“Yes?”

“So, she was born with one kidney damaged. And the other one is failing right now.” His grip on your hand slackened and so did his expression. You slowly turned your head to look at him and the sight of him nearly made you go pale. He was pale. His eyes were and his hair a mess. You had never seen him look like this before. He looked so…so…afraid. “Did…Did something cause her kidney failing? Did someone cause-“ He stopped and you felt the way his hands were shaking.

And you suddenly realized what he was asking. What he was thinking.

Did I cause her kidney to fail? Is it me who almost killed her?

You quickly reached for his hand and squeezed it reassuringly, but all he could do was stare at the doctor with the same horrified look.

The doctor leaned back in his chair, clutching the papers in his hand and he sighed deeply.

And to your horror, he nodded. “I’m afraid it were indeed external circumstances that caused your wife’s kidney to give in. I’m afraid someone might have poisoned her.”

For a moment everything was quiet, except for the soft humming of the machines, the slow drip of the IV. But then something in his face changed. The fear turned to the same murderous look he held whenever he got so ungodly angry.

“Poisoned her?” He said slowly.

The doctor nodded again. “I’ve found her sodium chloride levels are concerningly high. And unless she hasn’t been eating spoonsful of salt every day for months or years of her life, someone might have slipped her a preparation.”

His expression changed yet again and now he looked at you with a mixture of fury and pleading; pleading to believe him that it hadn’t been him who tried to poison you. But you were already more than aware.

“I know who did it.” You said quietly. Both of them stared at you in shock.

“What?” Asked the doctor.

You nodded slowly. “My mother. She gave me medicine for my slow kidney since I turned fourteen. I never questioned it.”

The doctor’s expression turned sour at the mention of that. “If that truly is so, we have to inform authorities and-“

“My mother is dead.” You said without flinching.

“Oh, that’s…alright, then. However, it would make sense. It’s good you stopped taking the medication. Had you continued to take it, it might have caused a cardiac infarction. Your husband said you just recently turned twenty-five. That’s not normal. It was highly intentional. Your mother caused great harm on you, miss.”

You took a slow breath to try and keep yourself from crying, but it was useless. Tears clouded your vision and you hid your face behind your hands.

Despite the tension in his body, the anger coursing through his veins, his hands were gentle in your hair.

“It’s okay.” He whispered in a mixture of furious and tender. “She won’t ever harm you again. No one will.”

It took you a few minutes to finally calm down again, but when you did, he gently pulled your hands from your face and looked at you with the same concerned look.

“So, what does this mean now?” He asked the doctor. “What will become of her?”

The man looked down at the files on his lap and shook his head. “On the long term, she will need a kidney transplant.”

It was the worst thing he could have said. The worst. A quick death was what you always anticipated and hoped for. Him losing his patience and shooting you in a fit of anger didn’t sound half as bad as that did. You knew how these things ended. You’d get on a list and you’d never ever get a kidney in time. And if you did, your body would fight it and you’d end up dying anyway.

He seemed to have the same thoughts, because you felt him freeze. His grip on your hand stayed the same, but all the color drained from his face. “Transplant?”

The doctor nodded. “On the long term, yes. We already put you on the waiting list, miss. We’ll do our best, I promise you and I stand by my promise. You’ve been through so much and you’re so young. We’ll do our best for you. Until then…you’ll have to go with dialysis.”

You were crying silent tears, begging and praying on the inside.

God, why me and why that? Why couldn’t it have been me who fell on the trainlines instead?

“Dialysis.” Your so-called husband responded in a breathless whisper. “That…that’s not so bad, right? It’s not like chemotherapy.”

The doctor nodded. “It’s still a great effort for her body to take, but it’s not comparable to cancer. She’ll be weakened, yes, but she’ll be able to perform basic tasks and take care of herself. And we’ll be working to find a kidney for her as fast as possible. A kidney isn’t as hard to find as a heart would be. It’s not likely. You might even get lucky and have a donor in your circle.”

He released a slow breath and drew gentle circles on the back of your hand with his thumb.

“You said you had good news for us?” He asked quietly.

The doctor nodded slowly and set the papers aside. His expression calmed somewhat and he regarded you both with a long look, before his gaze settled on your face.

“You’re seven weeks pregnant.”

He might as well have punched you, because that was exactly how you felt.

You wanted to react, in any way really. But you had no idea how you felt. How you were supposed to feel. You only knew that you were terribly afraid.

And so you slowly looked over to the man hunched beside you, trying to gauge his own reaction. Was he happy about this? Was he angry? His face gave nothing away. He looked dumbstruck. And for the first since you knew him, he looked genuinely terrified.

“Pregnant.” He whispered.

His gaze slowly wandered to you and back to the doctor. “But her kidney-“

“It is not impossible to carry a child in her condition. There may be a few complications and the risk is slightly higher than it would be if she was completely healthy, but it isn’t impossible.”

“What does slightly higher mean? Higher chance to die? No, forget it.” He bit out. “We’re not doing this.”

“Forgive me, but-“

“No.” He said firmly. “I’m not going to let her die over this.”

The doctor cleared his throat and nodded. “I understand that. And what you’re going to do will be you and your wife’s own decision in the end. I’d just like to make the following clear: She can still take the dialysis, even while pregnant. We could perform a peritoneal dialysis. It would have to be done every day, but she could do it at home. It’s rather uncomplicated.”

He was still rigid beside you and just as he was about to snap at the doctor again, you spoke in a quiet voice, causing him to stop himself.

“Would it harm the baby?”

The doctor smiled a gentle, reassuring smile. “No.”

“And the baby wouldn’t have any disadvantages due to my lack of a functioning kidney?”

“There’s always the possibility that the baby might come early. We’d have to keep a keen eye on its development, of course. It could be that it gets born with a birth weight of under 2.500 gram. That’s not uncommon for cases like yours, but it by far wouldn’t be the first one.”

You felt your insides twist painfully. Everything was simply too much. You still hadn’t gotten over the fact that your own mother tried to murder you for some reason and now you were here. Pregnant. Talking about things like birth weight.

“Am I-“

“I told you, this isn’t up for discussion.” His firm voice suddenly interrupted you.

You bit your lip and looked up at the doctor. “Could I get a moment alone with my husband?”

He immediately got up and gathered the documents surrounding him. “Of course. Take as much time as you need.”

The moment the door shut behind him, he shot you a crazed look. “There’s no way in hell you’re actually considering this.”

You stayed silent. A part of you wanted to fight him on this, but you felt weak. Too weak to argue, too weak to even speak. Something had changed, something had changed so drastically that you didn’t even know what you wanted anymore. The only thing you truly knew…

“I can’t kill it.”

He took a deep breath and sat down beside you again. “We’re not killing it. It doesn’t understand what’s going on. It is too tiny to feel pain.”

“But it’s our baby.” The words slipped out in a pained whisper before you could stop yourself and the effect your words had on him was immediately recognizable. His eyes softened the same instant.

“I know.” He said quietly and reached for your hand again. “And I’m dying to have a baby with you. Really, I am. But not if it means you might die trying to bear it.”

“But the doctor said-“

He gently cupped your face in his palms and made you look up at him. “You’re sick.” His voice sounded as firm as it was gentle. His eyes were practically pleading with you. “You’re sick and I can’t lose you.”

You swallowed the lump in your throat and gently circled his wrist in your hand. You were probably being manipulative, you were biased anyway. Unlike your mother, you immediately loved your child. You didn’t understand it. Didn’t even fully realize that it was truly there, inside you, but you loved it. And you couldn’t kill it. Never.

You gently got hold of his hand and guided it down your chest, until it reached your abdomen and you pressed it down softly.

His eyes followed your movement and he seemed to hold his breath. He wanted it just as much as you did, if not more. You saw it in his eyes. The tenderness. The pain. The instant protectiveness. Everything you loved about him.

The man who cut your hair and hit you when you spoke out of line, he was gone. The man who took your name and your identity from you, the man who threatened you, the man who scared you – he was nowhere to be found.

He was still the same, dangerous man underneath it all. You knew that. There was no way you could ever forget it. After seeing him murder someone twice – and maybe a third time – you knew what he was.

But in that moment? In that moment, he was somebody else.

The husband type of guy.

Your guy.

Your man.

And you were his. Only his.

He released a slow breath and his gaze slowly wandered up from your stomach to your face.

“I can’t.” He said quietly.

When you shot him a confused frown, he sighed and leaned back, but he kept his gentle grip on you.

“I can’t lose you.”

You sighed softly and gently tightened your grip on his hand. “But I might die anyway.”

His eyes darkened at that. “Don’t say that. Don’t you dare even think that.” He hissed.

“It’s true.” You said quietly. “How high is the chance that I get a kidney in time? How many people live in Korea?”

“Don’t think about that now.” The determination is his voice was almost reassuring. Almost. Like he knew something that you didn’t. “I’ll find a way.”

“What?”

He shook his head. “All you need to do is focus on yourself, alright? Nothing else. I’m going to take care of everything else.”

“Okay.” You said quietly, even though you were not even close to convinced. What would he take care of? What did that mean? You had a bad feeling about it. “But I’m not having an abortion.”

He exhaled slowly. “You’re so fucking stubborn.”

You smiled weakly. “And you hate that about me, don’t you?”

Surprisingly he returned the smile and gently touched your chin. “I love that about you.”

His gaze wandered back down to where his hand lay and he slowly shook his head. “Are you really sure about this? It won’t be easy.”

You bit your lip and nodded.

His brows furrowed in thought and he didn’t meet your gaze yet. “I’m going to be a terrible father.”

That sent a spark of pain through you, because you heard the sorrow in his voice. What a silly man he was. Didn’t he see it?

“No. You’re going to be a wonderful father.”

He scoffed and attempted to look away, but your hand shot out and you gently touched his cheek, guiding him to look back at you. He seemed surprised, but he still let you.

“You are going to be a wonderful father.” You said slowly and firmly. The firmness in your voice took you by surprise, but you didn’t back down. For some reason, you were more than convinced of your own words. “You’re going to be everything your own father wasn’t.”

Under the gentle touch of your hand, you felt him tense, but he didn’t look away and it wasn’t anger in his eyes. It was uncertainty. Fear, maybe. And a whole lot of disbelief.

“How would you know that?”

“I know how it feels to be loved by you.” You said quietly. It was true. He was a twisted freak, someone who had missed not many an opportunity to hurt you. But at the same time, he protected you. He cared about you and he went to extreme lengths for you. “Wouldn’t you die for me?” You didn’t understand your own question or why you asked it, but something made you. A higher power, something that took control over your mind and tongue.

His frown deepened and he tightened his grip on you. “What a dumb question.”

You nodded and gently caressed his cheek. “That’s why I’m sure.” You whispered. “I want this baby. I want our baby. Because I…I trust you to take care of me. Of us.”

He kept staring at you with the same thoughtful, pained frown, until he finally closed his eyes and gently buried his face against your midsection.

“You’re such a stubborn idiot.” He murmured.

You smiled and gently buried your fingers in his hair. “Such a harsh way to talk to the mother of your child.”

You heard his smile, even though you didn’t see it. “I have a few conditions though.”

He looked back at you with a stern glint. You raised a brow and waited for him to continue.

“You don’t do anything. All you’re going to do for the time being is lay in your bed, read your books and nothing more. You’ll leave everything to me and you’ll listen to me. Understood?”

For some reason, that made you smirk. “Or else what?”

His eyes darkened. “Understood?”

Your smile softened and you nodded. “Understood.”

He sighed deeply and regarded you with a careful look. He still didn’t seem all too convinced.

“Alright.” He murmured.

“One more thing.” Your eyes shot open and you looked at him, the softness and warmth gone from your tone. “What happened today?”

He tensed again and averted his gaze. “You don’t have to worry about that.”

“What? But that guy who followed us-“

“Shh.” He shot you a glare. “Stop it. No one followed us.”

You frowned incredulously. “I’m not letting you shut me out like this. Where did the blood come from? What did he want?” You said lowly, looking over his shoulder to make sure there was no one listening in on your conversation.

“This is neither the time nor the place.”

“You said something about my mother.” You suddenly remembered. “Before I passed out. Tell me the truth. I’m not joking. What about my mother?”

He clenched his jaw. He was losing his patience, but so were you. “I didn’t-“

Now it was you who shot him a glare. “Tell me.”

“Listen.” He said slowly as he leaned back and shot you another stern look. “I can’t have you stressed out right now. Did you forget what happened last time?” He tugged gently on the IV as if to remind you.

But you didn’t let him and you caught his hand in your own. “Tell me. Right now. Why did he follow us? Did he-“ Your eyes widened and your grip on him loosened. “Oh God.” You whispered. “Oh God, she sent him.”

He immediately caught you by the shoulders as you tried to sit up. “Calm down, okay? Stop this. It’s not that dramatic.”

“She sent him.” Your voice grew shaky in panic. The same woman who had systematically tried to poison you. The same woman who marked you. Who isolated you. The woman who was supposed to love you and give her life for you. “Did you kill him?”

“No.” He said quietly.

“No?”

He shook his head. “He’s in the wardrobe.”

You felt yourself go pale. “What? In the-“

“Don’t. Panic.” He said firmly. “I’m not letting him leave like that. I have plans for him. I’m going to find out what he knows and how he found it out. And I’m not letting him get back to her. I have his phone and everything else.”

The dizziness came back the same instant and your eyes fluttered shut.

“Hey, hey.” He murmured and gently touched your cheek. “It’s alright. Don’t worry. You’ll never see her again. I promise you. Over my dead body. And you don’t have to see him either. All of that is nothing but a matter I’m going to take care of.”

You nodded weakly, but inside you felt nauseous. How on earth did she find out?

“And the blood?” You whispered.

He scoffed. “The bastard tried to inject me something. And he even had a taser. What kind of man would use a taser?”

You took a shaky breath. “But he didn’t?”

He shook his head. “You think I’d let him?” He smiled bitterly. “When I looked outside, I saw his gun and I knew something was off. I immediately knew he wanted something from you. Why else would he have followed us? I also have no idea how he found the right apartment by the first try. There are many things I don’t know yet. But I’m going to find out. But you.” He shot you a stern look. “You are going to stay in bed and do nothing but take care of the little one right here.” He gently prodded your bellybutton with his index finger and it almost made you smile.

If it wasn’t for your mother, you would have smiled.

“I can’t go back to her.” You whispered. “I’ll die before I do.”

He inhaled slowly and gently tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. “No one’s taking you away from me. And anyone who tries, will see.”

After a while, the doctor came back. He explained a few more things and after running a bunch of tests, he announced you wouldn’t have to go through dialysis yet. He’d have to check your kidney progress twice every week and there would be no way to avoid it, by the time your slow kidney decided to give up entirely.

But until then, you’d check your blood pressure three times every day and unless it got worse – you were free to act normal. Of course everything was a bit complicated so he prohibited you from taking any demanding tasks. But so far, and unless you weren’t taking the dialysis, your pregnancy wasn’t high-risk. He said that he would prefer it, if you took things easy – “Oh, she will, don’t worry. I’m not letting her leave the bed.” – but he gave you green light for light tasks and intimacy. Before you left, he said something to the doctor in Korean. They both glanced at you quickly before they slowly left the room, leaving you there in confusion and suspicion.

The drive home was rather quiet. Both of you were lost in your thoughts and your fears, but he kept a possessive grip on your thigh the whole way.

“You can’t die, you know.” He suddenly said. “If you did, I’d follow you and kick your ass.”

You smiled softly and looked up at him, but his gaze was trained on the street and there was not a hint of amusement in his eyes.

“I won’t.” You said quietly. “Who else would show you how to change a diaper?”

Now, that made him smirk. “As if you know that.”

You laughed quietly. “We’ll learn it together.”

He took a turn and parked in the car park. When he was done, he slowly turned to face you.

“Are you really sure you want to go through with this?”

“I am.” You said gently.

He took a breath and nodded. “Alright.” Just as he was about to open the door, you held him back.

“What did you ask the doctor?”

His brows shot up in surprise. “What?”

“You know what I mean. Before we left, you spoke in Korean. What was that about?”

He clenched his jaw and averted his gaze. He got worse and worse when it came to lying to you.

“Come on, let’s get inside. I have to take care of a few things.”

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Author's note: Surprise, surprise. Hehe. Also, guys, I have a feeling I'm stuck between half the readers wanting more angst and drama and the other half wishing for more fluff. Might have to throw some flashbacks in?

Love you!

[chrollohearttags]

hard to breathe • portgas d. ace

seeing your ‘ex’ boyfriend ace one last time for closure..or so you thought. (based off of this song I’ve been obsessed with for months. It’s ‘old’ but I felt like it fit him and the vibe of this fic)

📝: black fem!reader, lots of relationship angst, modern au, heavy kissing, arguing + lots of dialogue, they’re slightly toxic ( y’all both ain’t shit I’m sorry 😭), riding, car sex, dirty talk, breeding, baby trapping (kinda), infidelity, hair pulling, pet names and daddy used, crying

wc: 4.1K

🎙️: I love writing my faves in a bunch of different scenarios, including ones that aren’t typical for their personality. This is in no way condoning toxicity, infidelity or anything of the sort. I just thought it would be a lil fun to experiment.

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“Where are you right now?”

“I should be with you..”

“You know that’s not a good idea..”

“Yeah, but it’s what we both want..who cares if it’s wrong or not?”

3:30am

the deep drawl on the other end of the line luring you in with each word..it always had a tendency to do so, even when you wished you could just ignore it.

“Ace, what the hell do you want from me? Stop this.”

“C’mon, babe. It’s the truth. Don’t tell me you’re feeling guilty..what did I tell you? You’ve got to stop giving so much a damn about what other people think.”

“Go to hell. Not everyone can just mistreat people like it’s nothing.”

it was a shame honestly..this type of behavior was so unbecoming of both of you. A sweet girl who didn’t like to make much of a fuss for anyone or over anything. And him, the shining example of a stand up guy. Charming, kind, helpful, a little rough around the edges but what every man should strive to be. Yet here you were..whispering into the speaker of your phone as to not wake the one in the room next to you. A mere replacement to dull the ache in your heart caused by him and his stupidity. Meanwhile, he was chuckling in your ear. Seemingly teasing you because he could sense the tension in your shaky voice. He knew you’d bolt the second you heard a ruffle from the other room…but he also knew you’d never hang up. Knew you couldn’t resist answering in the first place and for damn sure, that you couldn’t resist his offer…

“I want to see you. I can be at your place in ten..”

“Are you out of your fucking mind? It’s late, Ace..and—“

“And what? Afraid your little boyfriend might wake up? I know it’s not because you don’t want to see me either.”

“You’re a piece of work, you know that? How dare you? You ended things, Ace. Not me. So why the fuck do you keep hitting me up?”

the line would fall silent for a moment..only the shallow echoes of your breath captured on the opposite end. That was until you’d hear a sigh and his voice once more. This time with a much less arrogant tone.

“Listen, (y/n)..I get it. I fucked up..it’s my fault things turned out this way and I’m sorry. I know I can’t go back or change anything that happened between us but I can try to make it right. Even if it means someone else gets to do what I couldn’t…I just wanted a chance to apologize. In person…which I should’ve been man enough to do from the jump.”

the things in question? Your relationship..a bond of three years to be exact and a union everyone was certain would end in the two of you walking down the aisle. However, life has a funny way of throwing even the biggest of curveballs. This man had all but swept you off your feet one night a few summers ago..both out with friends and enjoying the night life as young singles should. Drinking, laughing and having a blast. Even though you were a bit more on the reserved side, he still managed to spot you out of all the beautiful women in that club that night. And trust, a fair share of them had been vying for his attention. Even so, he couldn’t focus on anyone but you. That was one of Ace’s many wonderful qualities. In a room full of people, he managed to make you feel special..as if you were the only one there. Which wasn’t exactly intentional..his biggest issue was that he tried to be friendly, trying his hardest not to hurt anyone’s feelings anymore. He struggled with his anger quite a bit when he was younger, taking next to nothing to set him off and if he was in the midst of conversation with one person, it was best that no one else tried to interrupt. However, he realized that only caused trouble so he always tried to greet someone regardless. It just didn’t fare very well when it came to women. No girl wants someone that it seems everyone can access to!

But alas, you sat in that section next to him; nursing your drinks and exchanging pleasantries. He was so easy to talk to. He had this awkward yet charming charisma about him. Almost as if despite his good looks, he wasn’t the ‘ladies man’ you’d peg him to be off first glance. Somehow though, he managed to get your number and the rest was history. You began hanging out, going on a couple dates..even spending a weekend together after a bad storm trapped the two of you inside of his apartment. You really enjoyed being around him and as time passed, the bond grew stronger. Six months later, you came over to visit and found yourself greeted by smoke and an obviously frustrated Ace covered in soot..a result of him attempting to cook a dinner to formally ask you to be his girlfriend! It was those goofy yet sweet gestures that made you adore him.

perfectly flawed was the best way to describe him in your book…maybe he made mistakes and maybe he didn’t come from this picturesque family but he was a damn good guy doing his best to be better than what he was used to. He was a hard worker and willing to fight for what he wanted.

You cherished every moment you guys got to spend together and at one point, you even got matching tattoos of half hearts on each of your hands..however, things began to crumble in the once ideal world you had curated together.

going from laughing all the time to petty arguments that seemed intentional. From spending late nights together..making love until the sun shines over your bodies..now you were blowing up his phone to see where he was. You began to suspect that he was cheating. Perhaps somewhere with another woman. But you were wrong..truth be told, he was running.

running away from a healthy home and relationship because he didn’t know how to handle it. Didn’t know how to process being loved unconditionally without expecting the worst to happen…he never figured himself to be good enough for you to begin with but here you were..constantly showering him with affection; buying him gifts, making his favorite meals and even surprising him with massages after long, stressful days at work. You were everything he didn’t deserve! Hence why..he felt the need to blow it up before it could escalate. He couldn’t let you continue treating someone like him as if he were special. Three weeks later, he texted you asking to break up and to say you were devastated? Was an understatement. You loved this man so damned much, you had already begun looking at wedding dresses and contemplating baby names, figuring you guys were in this for the long run. But fairy tales don’t exist and you weren’t getting the story book ending. Instead, you were left heartbroken..trying to piece yourself back together and figure out what went wrong.

“Just one last time, that’s all I’m asking. I want to say I’m sorry and then I’m out of your hair for good, I promise. I won’t bother you ever again..”

a solid compromise, you supposed. Besides, you’d be lying if you said you didn’t want to look him in his eye and tell him to go fuck himself for how he fumbled you. He’d plead, calling your name until he got a response and finally:

“I’ll be in the lobby, call me when you get here.” Before disconnecting the line and releasing a heavy sigh. You fought back tears but in order for the next chapter of your life to begin, you had to finish this one. But the funny thing about some books…

is that they refused to remain closed!

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page break bc I don’t do filler

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“..it’s nice to see you again. You look beautiful as always—“

“Enough of the small talk. State your business and make it quick.”

the two of you sat parked outside of your luxury apartment complex, downstairs in the desolate parking garage. Your arms folded across your chest in a defensive manner and his stretched across the steering wheel..that goofy snark on his face as he kissed his teeth. He knew you were fighting so hard to stand firm in your boundaries, something you struggled with in the past. And truthfully, he hated to disrupt that peace…but he was selfish, gluttonous even. He wasn’t always this nice guy everyone saw him as. He wanted to have his cake and eat it too and if that meant he’d leave your head a mess once again then so be it. A fucked up sentiment but the truth nonetheless..

“…damn. It's like that then? Fair enough..”

turning in his seat, Ace shifted and focused his attention directly on you. It was hard to maintain eye contact because how could he face you after such a betrayal? Even so, this was his bed he made and it was time to lie in it.

“The truth is...I was afraid. One day, you’d wake up and realize that I wasn’t what you thought I was. That I was broken and I didn’t have my shit together. It’s like no matter what I did in my life, I found a way to fuck it up. Make a mess of things..I’m not like you, (y/n). Honestly, what could you possibly see in me? Don’t you want someone who’s your equal?”

by this time, tears were beginning to swell in his eyes as well. The more he spoke, he realized that these feelings of insecurity were always within him. You promised yourself that you were just going to give him a piece of your mind, storm out and never have to see him again. But it was never that easy with this man.

you knew he was genuine and not just trying to victimize himself. He honestly felt like you could do so much better. But he also knew by the look in your eyes that you were not going to let him get away so easily.. You didn’t hate him, hell, you couldn’t even bring yourself to fully get angry with him for what he did. Looking down, Ace would begin to chuckle; a weird coping mechanism for him in times of stress and uttered the last words you wanted to hear.

“And after all this time, all the bullshit I put you through..you still love me, don’t you? That’s the only reason you’re still sitting here..the only reason you didn’t hang up. When you’re done with something, you never give it a second thought.” sitting cross armed, you’d begin to laugh. Not at his hurt but at the fact that for the first time in almost five years of knowing him, you saw him show genuine, raw emotion. You saw him finally let down his guard and be himself…as sad as it was, it was a bit cathartic.

“Wow…so you are capable of communicating your feelings and there isn’t a ten foot wall of bullshit in that head of yours.” Poking the side of his temple playfully..

“Of course I love you. I never stopped, you inconsiderate jackass. What did I ever do to you? That’s all I could ask myself. You keep talking about me deserving better and all of this bullshit..who gave you the right to decide what I wanted and what I deserve? Shouldn’t I have a say too? You left because it was easy, Ace. Instead of working through it with me, you ran because you don’t want anyone thinking you’re weak. That’s not how relationships work..we’re supposed to see each other at our worst, our best..good and bad days. If you feel insecure about anything, you did it to yourself because you were perfect to me and you know damn well I never made you feel anything less than.”

those words stung like none other. And honestly, no matter what he said, there wasn’t a good enough excuse for any of his behavior. You said it best..he was selfish, immature and didn’t think clearly. Ace had a knack for marching to the beat of his own drum and damn the consequences.

“..you’re right, (y/n). It’s my fault..and I can’t take any of it back…” suddenly, you’d feel his hand clutch the top of your own, intertwining your fingers as he stared you in the eye.

“..but I can try to fix it. Fix us..let me make this right. Please…if you’re happier with someone else, then there’s nothing I can do. But—“ In that moment, (y/n) had finally heard all that you could take. Reaching over the console, you’d clutch his face in your palm and shove your lips together. The sensation of that warm kiss sent a surge throughout your body..a spark you hadn’t felt since the day he left.

“Are you done? God, I swear you talk too damn much.” Prompting him to laugh as you held the side of his face. He was a little taken aback by your sudden dominance. Not knowing you to ever take control like this but he wasn’t mad about it one bit..

“..why’d you kiss me? What about your boyfriend?” A question as disrespectful as it was rhetorical.

“You’re as dumb as you are cute sometimes. You think I came all the way out here at three am to chit chat? Nut uh, you owe me..also, you’re a greedy bastard. No way you’re letting me go back in that apartment unless it’s with you." By this time, your hands were roaming his chest and your faces were only inches apart. His lips would curl into a sheepish grin before his palm snaked to the back of your neck, tugging your head towards him.

“..what can I say, babe? I’m just too damn stubborn..I always have to get my way.” And with that, you’d find your tongues joined together again. Twirling around one another with heavy whimpers mixed in. Suddenly, you’d find yourself crawling into the driver's seat and onto his lap. Just as you’d suspected, he’d worn those gray sweats you’d always loved to see him in and a black tank top to display his muscles, along with a newly acquired tattoo.

This man was not slick at all! Even so, his little tactic worked because all those memories of late nights and early mornings with him came rushing back. When you’d find yourself sneaking out on lunch breaks at work just to come eat his dick up or when he’d show up at your apartment around midnight because he’d work the closing shift again. With a bottle of wine and the intention of putting you through the mattress in every position after two glasses got you turned on. It was always exciting and spontaneous with Ace, something your ‘new man’ lacked. Slowly winding in his lap as you continued to make out, (y/n) caressed his torso..missing the familiar touch of his skin, taking in the scent of his cologne and immersing yourself in him. He’d run his thumbs across your throat, gently squeezing as you took his bottom lip between his teeth.

“You’re so beautiful..I missed you.” “Yeah? You missed me, baby?” Teasing him as you bounced your ass against his crotch, subtly twerking on his visible bulge. Caressing your gentle fingertips across his freshly shaven jawline. You could feel him growing harder underneath him and knew he wouldn’t be able to hold out much longer. Even kissing on his neck and licking on his jugular. “Mmmm..fuck. Pull that dress up and I’ll show you just how much.” Without a single bit of hesitation, you lifted the hem and allowed your bare cheeks and slit to graze him. Shuffling around underneath you, Ace slid his thumbs into the sides of those sweats, letting them pool around his waist. Meanwhile, he couldn’t stop marking your neck and lips with tender kisses..or apologizing for how stupid he was! Being here with you again brought back a flood of memories and emotions..ones that he never wanted to lose again. He needed this to be real once more. However, you weren’t much for talking right now..if he wanted to win his girl back, all you needed were actions.

“Why are you still talking? Just fuck the shit out of me before I grow a conscience and change my mind.” Your command being heard loud and clear; forcing him to grip your waist and balance you above that aching tip. Swollen red and seeping with precum, he was eager for you and that warm cunt was welcoming him in.

“Yes ma’am..whatever you say.” Following up his remark with a toothy smirk so you knew he was going to deliver and give you exactly what you were looking for. (Y/N) reclined against the steering wheel for a moment as he slowly infiltrated that entrance. That core drooling as he made home inside of you. Both of your heads fell backwards in a haze of pleasure…enjoying the all too familiar feeling of being one!

“Shiiit..why are so fucking tight? Oh my gosh..” those breathy moans and whines escaped his mouth the second he began thrusting. Not even two pumps in and he was trying to maintain his composure. With you though, he failed pretty quick. Reacclimating to the warmth that was your insides was going to be a challenge. Even so, he’d continue to guide you up and down on his shaft, letting that thick cock stretch open those wet folds.

“That’s it, pretty girl. Take this dick…just like that..” Meanwhile, (y/n)’s mouth fell ajar, overstimulated by the sensation already. You’d paw at his chest, holding onto him as he maneuvered you to his liking. Using your body like that of a flesh light. “’s so good. Missed this big fucking dick.” Hearing those words elicited another chuckle from Ace, prompting him to cradle the back of your neck in a dominant manner, pulling you close. “Yeah? Your little boyfriend ever fuck you like this?” Questioning through clenched teeth as he continued guiding your lower half..

those soft insides wrapping around him with each stroke. You’d then feel the tight clutch of his hand on the back of your head, tugging at those freshly styled wefts coursing down your back..he was aware of the minute fortune you spent each month to upkeep your beauty. From the thousand dollar hair appointments, nail salon visits and waxes..even so, he didn’t give a damn! Turning his gorgeous girl into a sloppy slut was his favorite pastime. A toothy grin on his face, watching your swollen tits bounce and drool seep from the corners of your mouth, along with the loud moans following suit.

“..I’ll take that as a no. You’re squeezing me like you haven’t come in ages, babe.” Those taunts harbored more truth than you’d care to admit. As shameful as it was to be cheating, you’d never be happy with someone who couldn’t give you a nut! Hypocritical as it was abhorrent, you too would never be satisfied until you got what you desired. And that desire was the guy slamming balls deep up inside of you at the moment. Pounding that sensitive little core..letting that fat mushroom tip split you open and begging for that sweet cunt to siphon him for every last drop of cum he had. “You’re fucking dripping..you must’ve needed this bad. Goddamn..” referring to the creamy release you had drizzling his cock. Making a mess of his lap. “Y—yeah..you’re the only one who can make me cream like this.” Cock drunk and giggling as he catapulted you up and down. The vehicle began to sway due to the heavy activity taking place and the windows also began to fog up as a result. That’s when you’d feel his palms colliding with your asscheeks, egging on your bouncing. It was in the midst of those heavy handed smacks that he’d begin pleading his remorse. Telling you how sorry he was for how he mistreated you. As cute as it was, you weren’t interested in any half assed apologies, but rather….

”…if you’re really sorry, you’ll nut in me. This is your pussy so act like it..” Uttering those words with a wide smile on your face whilst meeting his strokes with heavy bounces..nearly made Ace convulse. He loved when you spoke to him in such a domineering manner. You’d feel a sudden twitch inside of you and his hands guiding you as you slammed down on that cock. Your cheeks grazing the outer rim of the steering wheel..both of you so close to your peak that you’d claw into one another’s skin.

Covered in a sheen of sweat and saliva..begging the other to get you there and revealing all of your deepest confessions for one another..including the fact that he wanted you to be his forever and that you weren’t leaving this parking lot without him. You’d clearly chosen who you wanted to be with.

“…damn right it’s my pussy, princess. I don’t care who you bring home. You belong to me and I belong to you..no one else can come between that. Ever again.”

not to mention..you were begging for his cum yet again. You’d often divulge in the throes of pre-climatic bliss that you wanted to have his kid..be so full of his seed that there was no way you weren’t pregnant and Ace certainly had no objections to it. Maybe it was the sensation of being cream pied or the fact that you really wanted a family with him. Either way, he constantly fantasized about seeing you full with his seed; how adorable you’d look with a bump and he just couldn’t maintain his composure.

“Yes..please come in me. Want your baby—“ having to laugh again at how cute and pathetic you were becoming. But alas, there was no room for shame right now. You’d plead with your last breath to feel that womb stuffed again.

“That right, gorgeous? Does my pretty girl want me to get her pregnant?..” “Yes, nut in this fucking pussy, daddy. Please!” certainly a far cry from the headstrong woman who was yelling at him before. Now, you were reduced to a desperate little cumslut, pleading to be bred. Luckily, you didn’t have to wait long. After experiencing your second orgasm in close succession, Ace would pin you down and force his cock up into you, going as fast as he could muster. “Don’t worry, you’re gonna take every drop. You’re going to have my baby and I’m going to take such good care of you both. Gonna marry you—be a better man this time around..” That soft flesh ricocheting as a result..loud grunts and curse words filling the car as he prepared to do the same to you.

“M fucking coming, babe! Hold still—shit!—“ in that moment, that orgasm would rip through his body and just as you requested, all of his warm seed coursed through your insides and didn’t stop for a solid two minutes..having not had a proper orgasm since you guys split up. He was still twitching inside of you, holding you to his chest as you both cried from how amazing it felt. Tears on both of your faces as a result of ecstasy.

“Damn, I guess I wasn’t the only one who needed that.” Teasing him amidst your cute giggles. Leaning up, (y/n) kissed the tip of his nose and caressed his cheek..unable to believe that you were here with him again. He’d gently stroke the side of your face as well..glaring at you as if you were the most precious thing in the world.

“I love you, (y/n)..so much. I never thought I’d get the chance to tell you that again. Feels so good.” And you shared his sentiment. He was the only one it ever felt genuine from and damn sure, the only guy you meant it to. Any guilt or shame had long since absolved and you knew this was exactly where you should’ve been. ”I love you too, Ace. I’m so glad you showed up.” It was going to be a long day, as you had some explaining to do. But for now..

“Shit..he’s calling me.”

“Ignore it..let me hold you a little bit longer, okay?”

you wanted to remain in this moment for as long as possible. After all, this is where you were happiest and there was no one who’d give you the high that he could.

[crabussy]

a few people have asked for scripts/ideas of how to respond to people who are being unkind! since these situations can be so varied, here's a general structure you could use:

acknowledge their frustration/anger. could be as simple as "ah, that must be frustrating. I can see why you're upset." trying to empathise or sympathise with the way they're feeling is vital. people are much more likely to listen to you and change their opinion if they feel heard! this is important to do first and foremost. it sets up their willingness to listen! if they feel heard, they'll hear YOU out.

attempt to explain the situation. you don't have to over-apologise, just make sure they're aware of possible nuances they may not have considered. "the situation is actually different to what you think, let me explain" or similar. might not always work but helps clear up misunderstandings!

ask them questions about their viewpoint. genuine questions, not rhetorical questions designed to shut them down. even if you don't like the answers, being heard can be huge when it comes to changing someone's mind. this is better in longer discussions! e.g. disagreements with friends and family rather than strangers.

if you have one, an anecdote of a similar situation can be helpful! this helps humanise yourself and it helps the person you're talking to relate to you. "I remember when one of my friends ignored my messages for a few days, I was really worried and angry. it turned out they were busy with exams, but at the time it really stressed me out. I can see why you felt the same way!"

make sure to be firm with your stance. being kind and being a pushover are different! this might take practice.

if you can, avoid saying "but". there can be a big difference between "I understand where you're coming from, but it's different to what you think" and "I understand where you're coming from. I think it's different to what you're imagining, let me explain." sometimes it doesn't matter! however, the word "but" can be a buzzword that makes people think you're brushing them off. not always the case though.

if the misunderstanding is with a peer/friend/coworker etc, ask if there's anything you can do in future to avoid this kind of thing. this shows them that you're thinking beyond this one situation, which shows that you're considerate!

this is a LOT. you don't have to tick every box every time. sometimes all it takes to make someone rethink their unkind words is just one of those examples! sometimes it's a minor infraction with a stranger, sometimes it's a big argument with a close friend. good luck everybody! [:

I'm so serious about being kind above all else. it has genuinely changed the way I interact with the world on a fundamental level and has made me so so much happier.

[pboogerswbb]

SO IT GOES - chapter 9

Paige Bueckers x oc Warnings: language, alcohol, barely proofread Wordcount: 3.7K A/C: HEY BABIESS here's chapter 9 but SOME DISCLAIMERS - this fic does not follow the official irl Dallas Wings game schedule before someone comes at me. ALSO this is so short i am aware but next one will make up for it i promise <33 ily guys please send reactions again bc i miss those and they're my favourite ever <333 OK ILY

-

Before London

“Zari! Zari, come sit over here,” Trey’s voice yells as I enter the plane, walking behind Paige ready to head back to Dallas.

“Shit,” I mumble to myself, making the blonde in front of me chuckle.

“I gotchu,” she whispers, clearing her throat before her voice rises above the crowd’s. “I need some help with the gameday vlog! Sorry Trey!”

The man’s face falls, watching closely as Paige allows me to pass her to slide into the window seat. 

“Thank you,” I say under my breath passing the blonde, the smell of her deodorant comforting me as it enters my nose. Paige smirks, sitting next to me and pressing her leg shamelessly against mine. I want to press back. But I need to remember our rules. Friends.

Walking into the bus for the airport many eyes had been fixated on me. Since my panic attack yesterday I had been feeling off, not quite right. Wearing the tight, uncomfortable clothes I had packed seemed like a nightmare, so Paige had lent me her hoodie for the flight home. For the first time my coworkers had seen me out of work clothes, which made me feel a little uneasy. Paige could tell, always smiling at me reassuringly when I began to feel unsure.

“You look good in that hoodie,” the blonde next to me grins as I buckle my seatbelt, eyes watching my each move. I give her a warning look. She only chuckles, raising her hands defensively. “Yooo, in like a friend way.”

“Okay,” I laugh softly, buckling the seatbelt. From the corner of my eye I notice the blonde’s eyes locked on me, a slight smile on me.

“Soo, do I get to drive you again?”

I laugh softly, feeling a familiar ease with the girl return. Since our talk yesterday after I freaked out both our moods had miraculously lifted. 

“You want to drive me?” I ask amused. 

Paige nods with that familiar grin I’d missed so much. I’m so enveloped in her presence I don’t even notice the plane beginning to take off.

“Bro I love driving you,” she admits. 

“Really?” I ask. Almost embarrassingly needy.

Paige leans back in her grey Nike tech, resting her head on the seat. “Yeah Iz,” she hums. “Best part of my day.”

I look at her for a moment, meeting her eyes, feeling butterflies grow in my stomach. No, just friends Zari. I quickly look away, gazing out the window noticing we’re about to take off. Before I can even ask, the blonde is gripping my hand hard, sending jolts of sparks up my arm, thumb rubbing my skin soothingly. 

-

“Shirley temple, thanks,” I say to the brunette bartender, her dark eyes quickly finding me in the middle of the other players lining up along the bar. A wide smile spreads on the girl’s face as she takes my order, beginning to make it in front of me.

“You sure that’s all you want?”

The bartender is flirting, I can tell. She’s got that spark in her eye, that sweet grin on her face, that tells me she wants me. It tempts me for a moment, the idea of taking her to my hotel room and working her all night.

“What are you drinking?” Izzie’s voice interrupts my thoughts, the girl completely forgotten the second she enters my mind. Her hand grabs my forearm and instinctively I wrap it around her lower back pulling her to the bar.

“A shirley, whatchu want?” I ask, unable to take my eyes off her. The bartender huffs, continuing to make my drink eyeing the both of us but I don’t even notice. Izara looks so unbelievably stunning, in a brown halter neck top and a leopard print skirt, makeup flawlessly done but hair left naturally wavy - rare for the girl. There was an ease in her demeanor the past few days since we’d become friends again. And truthfully, I felt the exact same. Our game against Liberty had been a clear loss but at least I got a few shots in. I wasn’t overthinking the ones I missed anymore.

“A dirty martini. But I can pay for it myself Paige.”

“Shut up,” I laugh, ordering the drink for her and letting the bartender work, looking around the club. Some of the Liberty players had asked us out, and after a game that wasn’t a huge flop, I had been quick to agree, inviting Izara and the rest of the media team out with all of us.

With an easy coolness I pay for the drinks, tipping really well as I always did which seemed to cheer up the pretty bartender a little. 

“Thank you,” Izzie’s sweet voice whispers, sipping on her martini and stirring it. I wanna tell her she looks beautiful, especially in the dim lighting of the club, the purple hue painting her skin. But I’m not sure if it’s too much, so I stay quiet.

“Paigeee!” Stewie’s voice rises over the crowd as she passes Arike, Lala, Lou and others, greeting them with a wide smile.

“My Husky,” the woman smiles, hugging me with one arm. “I think you owe me a drink since we won.”

I laugh, rolling my eyes. “Bro with the way you were flopping the second I touched you I think you owe me one.”

We laugh together, when I realise Izzie is just standing there, staring at us two.

“Oh yeah, this is Zari,” I hum, my hand wrapping around the dark haired girl’s waist without much thought.

“My brother’s such a fan of you,” the girl grins, shaking hands with the woman. Stewie smiles and nods.

“He’s got good taste. Nice to meet you,” she chuckles, quickly ordering a beer before returning to the conversation. “Why didn’t you tell me you got a British girl Paige?”

Izara and I burst into laughter, my hand quickly falling from her waist. A touch was okay, but I shouldn’t linger. A look was okay, but gazing wasn’t. There was a fine line between friendship and more that I was learning to tread carefully. But the urge to slip was there, bubbling beneath the surface constantly. But anything was better than not having Izzie in my life. My best friend in Dallas.

“Bro, no we’re not together,” I laugh, watching as Izara covers her mouth while giggling. There’s a hint of the faintest blush on her cheeks, but it’s gone as fast as it appeared. “She’s our social media girl.”

“Oh shit, my bad,” Stewie laughs. Zari waves her off with ease, shrugging. 

“Here you are!”

Trey interrupts the conversation, grabbing Izzie’s arm with a tight grip and pulling her closer. My hand falls off the girl, and I can’t help the flex of my jaw as I watch the way the man is intruding Izara’s personal space. I don’t even know why he had to come. I think he should’ve just stayed at the hotel. Why did he think anyone wanted him here? I sure didn’t.

“Oh hey,” Izzie chuckles as Trey throws his arm around her shoulder. It angers me. What angers me even more is that the dark haired girl doesn’t seem to mind. She remains still, sipping her martini, popping an olive into her mouth speaking to Stewie with ease. About what I couldn’t tell you. They almost look like a couple. I wanna kill him.

“So where’s Marta?” I ask Stewie, trying to refocus my attention.

“She’s at home with the kids, you wanna go sit down somewhere? It’s so loud here and I wanna catch up.”

I glance at Iz whose back is fully turned on me now, engaged in conversation with the brunette, brown eyed man. I think he’s 2 inches shorter than I am. That makes me happy.

“Yeah lemme get another drink first.”

-

After four martinis I can feel the way I’m losing control over my gaze. My eyes were stuck on Paige, sitting between Stewie and JJ, sipping on her drink and throwing her head back as she laughs. She looks stunning, in a slicked back bun, black denim shorts ripped on her thighs and an oversized t-shirt, silver chains dangling on her chest, diamond studs glimmering in the purple light of the club. My sight couldn’t move from the way Paige’s veiny hands are wrapped around the glass, her complexion tan from the Dallas sun of early summer.

“I could live here for sure… Like start a family here and shit,” Trey is speaking my ear off as always. If that man was good at something it was talking without needing a single reply. So I let him blabber. Not that I’m paying much attention to what he’s saying, mind far too wrapped on the blond sitting in the far corner.

“You want kids?”

This snaps me out of my tipsy thoughts, my head turning to the man. “Huh?”

“You ever want kids?”

Really not a conversation I want to have right now. Or ever with Trey. Why is he even talking to me about this? 

“Uh, yeah, I do,” I murmur and down my martini, letting it burn my throat satisfyingly. I don’t wanna think about it, about the life I gave up when I left Jasper. How even if I had a horrible husband at least I’d probably be pregnant, I’d be a mom soon. It was the one thing I had always wanted, to be a mom. Now I felt lost, worried I might never find that person for me - to have children with. I couldn’t bear to imagine it.

“Yeah?” Trey grins, revealing a row of white teeth. “How many?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” I chuckle awkwardly, putting my glass down. “Three, I guess.”

The man gasps, his hand grabbing my arm in excitement. “Me too! I want all boys. I could see you be a boy mom.”

I disagree so hard I can’t even fathom what’s coming out of his mouth. I always wanted a girl, more than anything. Trey clearly did not know me at all.

“Girl she’s so hot…”

I hear the two bartenders whispering to each other behind the bar. I snap my head towards them and notice both of the girls glancing towards, who else but Paige, and blushing.

“I know I’m straight but like… For her?” The red haired girl giggles. I roll my eyes, feeling annoyance rise to my chest, making it heave.

“Go ask for her number, she wants you for sure.”

“You think?”

“She was looking at your ass earlier.”

I feel hot in the face, angry, for whatever reason. I try to clear my throat to get their attention, to order another drink and partly to stop the conversation. But they don’t hear me.

“Fuck, okay, I’mma do it. Wish me luck.”

I watch as the red haired girl walks to the table, holding a tray of drinks I guess the group of girls ordered, obviously swaying her hips from left to right in an amplified way. Surely she was delusional, it would be stupid of Paige to be getting with random bartenders as famous as she had become.

It’s as if they move in slow motion, the girl leaning down with a bright smile placing the tray of drinks on the table. Paige’s blue eyes flash as she looks the bartender up and down and flashes that smug, flirty grin I knew much too well. The girl exchanges words with Paige, though I can’t hear over the thumping beat playing loudly. But from the looks on Stewie’s and JJ’s face I can tell it’s something flirty. The blonde digs her phone out of her pocket and allows the red haired girl to type what I assume to be her number in it.

“What can I get you?” The second bartender asks, as I lean against the bar, eyes sharp and watchful. I don’t hear her. I feel my face turn red, a strange frustration swelling up inside me. I wanted the girl to get away from Paige, my Paige.

“Zari? You tryna order?”

“Uh what?” Suddenly I snap out of my head as Trey taps me on the arm. The bartender is staring at me with expecting eyes. 

“Would you like something to drink?” She asks, her voice overly sweet. I decided I didn’t like her either, because why had she egged the red girl on?

“Uh, just a vodka soda, please,” I mumble, digging for my wallet.

“I got it,” Paige’s familiar, low voice murmurs from behind me, sliding her card smoothly to the bartender. I feel her front press into my back as she reaches over, the heat of her body making my mind spin.

“Thought you already got your drink,” I huff, and it comes off much more rude than I intended.

I feel the blonde chuckle soundlessly, her warm breath teasing my ear. “Need a straw,” she says, grabbing one from the holder set up on the bar. I feel irrationally upset, even more so now that she had paid for my drink. The moment it’s handed to me I scoff a quiet thanks, pushing off the bar and walking away with urgent steps. Paige is persistent as always, following close behind me like a puppy.

“Yo you good Iz?” She asks. The alcohol was hitting me, making my brain stupid and inconsiderate, words spilling from my lips before I could think them through.

“I don’t want to talk to you.”

Paige scoffs loud, still following at my heels as I hurry around the club aimlessly, trying to shake her off. I should know that was impossible with the blonde.

“What’s your problem?” Paige asks. I roll my eyes, but don’t answer. Frankly I don’t know what the answer is. I search my brain, looking for any valid reason or excuse for me to be mad. Because I couldn’t deal with the answer being that I have feelings for her. I just couldn’t.

“Nothing, just leave me be.”

Paige grabs my arm, stopping me and holding me still with ease and flipping me over to face her. My green eyes circle the walls of the club as we stand on the edge of the dancefloor, lights flashing purple, pink, blue, avoiding her gaze, her ocean eyes.

“Iz, what the hell is going on?”

I scoff again, shaking my head. “You’re being stupid. Flirting with random bartenders. You’re famous like actually famous. You need to be smarter Paige.” Good excuse. I almost believed it myself.

Paige furrows her brows, taken aback. “Bro, huh? Whatchu talkin about?”

“The girl you idiot!” I’m speaking with my hands now, flailing them everywhere, forcing the blonde to let go of me. “If she goes to the press it’s gonna be everywhere!”

“Who cares? I did nothin’ wrong! I’m single,” she argues back. She’s right. I was gonna lose this fight.

“Shouldn’t you focus on getting your game right first? Maybe that’s why you haven’t been doing as well, you’re unfocused.” It’s a low blow. I don’t even mean it. I knew how in her head Paige was about her games recently. I regret it the second it leaves my mouth. I should never drink again.

Paige goes silent, and raises her brows, kissing her lips with a bitter smile. “Wow Iz, fucking wow.” And she turns around and leaves me standing there alone.

-

“Hey, everyone’s start is hard. Don’t get in your head about it. You’ll find it.”

Stewie’s been staring at me staring at the floor and moping for the past ten minutes, sipping on my drink and biting my nails. Her words are so sweet that I don’t have the heart to tell her that my game is the absolute last thing on my mind. I’m still trying to comprehend the conversation between me and Izzie, the attitude she was giving me and wherever it was coming from, because I had no idea. I cross my legs, huffing and nodding as if to acknowledge Stewie’s words, though my head was filled with images of Izara’s stern face, the way she rolled her sharp eyes and crossed her arms over her chest, the way her voice sounded once she got angry. Everything about it had turned me on, insanely much. I’m really in it huh?

“Unless you’re Miles, now that girl’s been hooping,” JJ chuckles. Stewie nods with a smile, agreeing.

“Yeah she’s had a good start this season.”

JJ gets up, looking over at us two. “Anyone want another drink?”

I shake my head, still working on the fruity concoction I had ordered last. Once we’re alone, Stewie turns to me, studying my face.

“You good?”

I shrug, leaning back on my seat.

“Ohh, it’s a girl huh?” 

I grin and nod. “Always is.”

Stewie nods and looks around, watching the way my eyes glared over Izzie who was sitting next to Trey, looking at everything but me.

“It’s the British girl huh?”

“She’s…” I murmur, taking a sip of my drink. “She keeps me on my toes I’mma say that much.”

“Uh oh,” the woman laughs, clearly expecting me to keep talking. It works, the drinks making it easier for me to open up.

“Nahh, I’m playing. We’re just friends. But now she acting crazy over how I’mma ruin my public image or some shit by getting a girl’s number,” I groan. “Like she was forreal upset.”

Stewie listens with a small grin, nodding and glancing between me and the girl I was staring, my chest aching to touch her the drunker I got.

“I see that basketball IQ doesn’t translate to real life huh?” She asks. I don’t understand what she means. Reading my confused expression Stewie continues. 

“I don’t think she wants to be just friends. I think she’s jealous Paige,” Stewie nearly laughs at my ignorance. I’m about to get defensive, knowing this was a ridiculous thing to say. Why would Izzie, who wanted us to be friends, who kept rejecting me time after time, be jealous over me? But there’s no other reason, no other motive for her actions that makes sense. Izara is jealous over me.

-

I enter the women’s bathroom, trying to mull it over in my head. Had I had it wrong this entire time? Maybe Izzie had feelings for me, the same kind of feelings I had for her. She was just better at hiding it. The girl was always cool, calm and composed. Of course she was good at hiding it. It only makes sense. I walk to the sinks, watching my reflection in the mirror when Izzie opens a stall door, heels tapping on the marble of the floor as she walks to the sinks.

Her green eyes lock with mine in the mirror, her face still hard and stubborn. She’s not gonna talk to me, her gaze swiftly moving to the sink where she’s washing her hands diligently. Fine. If she won’t I will.

“Hey,” I say. Without looking at me she responds.

“Hello.”

I approach the girl, stepping closer to her. I needed to talk to her, I hated the coldness between us, even if it hadn’t lasted for longer than the past hour. Every minute we spent not together felt wasted to me.

“You thinking about heading back to the hotel soon?” I ask in hopes it would be enough to show effort for reconciliation. Instead she furrows her dark brows, turning to me.

“What you’re not gonna go home with that girl then?” She crosses her arms, green eyes even more vibrant in contrast to the black lining her waterlines. Not reminding me as much of the deep dark green of the forests back in Connecticut, but more so like the bright green of the first blades of grass pushing through the dead ground in the spring.

She continues before I can answer, face scrunched up in annoyance. “You know what, all those girls you bring home too, it’s so inconsiderate. It is so loud, it drives me insane! You should think of your neighbours once in a while, you know!”

Stewie was right. She’s jealous. Actually jealous of me with other girls. An involuntary grin begins to grow on my face, as I gaze down at the girl, loving the way she was a couple inches shorter even with heels. Thankfully the bathrooms are empty besides us two, because I’m too euphoric to even check.

“Honestly, it’s just being a bad neighbour and-” Izzie stops talking, noticing my expression, scoffing. “Why are you smiling?”

“You want me to stop?” I ask, my voice teasing.

“I- wh- pardon?”

My grin falls, expression turning serious, my voice turning low and genuine. “If you don’t want me with anyone else just say the word.”

Izzie’s eyes flutter shut for a moment as she takes my words in, cheeks beginning to redden as she comprehends them and what I mean.

“N-no it’s not that,” Iz murmurs, barely able to hold eye contact with me. “It’s just. So loud sometimes.”

I nod, stepping closer to her, our fronts nearly touching, electricity between us tingling, sending chills all over me.

“I’ll stop.”

“No Paige, you don’t need to. I don’t care about who you sleep with.”

“You don’t?” I ask, my gaze stuck on her face as her lips part to let out a shaky breath. She feels it just as much as I do.

Izara shakes her head slowly, never breaking eye contact. 

“Are you sure?” I ask, tongue swiping over my lower lip.

We stare at each other for a while and I can tell the dark haired girl is thinking it over, considering every detail before admitting to something that might end in a mistake. Just as she opens her mouth to speak, the door to the bathroom opens, a group of women walking in. I quickly avert my gaze, Izzie doing the same as I take a step back and clear my throat, feeling the burn between my legs return in a painful, desperate way.

Izzie takes a deep breath, turning her back to me as she dries her hand wordlessly. I watch her, her shiny black hair and the way it swings in the air, her long neck and jaw, the sharp slope of her nose.

As the girl takes steps towards the exit, walking past me I grab her arm carefully, but sternly, pulling her close.

“I mean it Izzie. Just say the word and it’s done. They’re gone. Just a word, ma."

Iz breathes heavy, looking at my face with heavy lidded eyes before nodding. I let go of her, my fingertips burning where they had touched her skin. The girl exits the bathroom, leaving me on fire, a tingling in my lower abdomen making me dizzy.

-

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[inbabylontheywept]

Kartchner Caverns

The first time I traveled to Tucson I was in a car full of zooted children. I would've preferred being one of those children, but alas, any medication that makes me sleep also makes me sleepwalk. And after an incident where I tried to climb out of the car while it was still going sixty (thank God for seatbelts), I was condemned to a childhood of car trip sobriety.

I was talking with my dad. 

I can't remember exactly what about - something to do with our final destination in Mexico. But at some point, we awoke my little brother. 

(Nothing good happens from waking a dreamer. Best case scenario, the dream ends. Worst case, it doesn't.)

I remember starting when I felt one of his small cold hands reach up to grab my shoulder. Our dad did the same, and it jerked the car a little bit - startling someone whose hands are on the steering wheel has its risks. Dad and I both turned to look at him, but he wasn't even looking at us. He was leaning over the console, staring into the red and purple sunset ahead, watching the rolling skyline of Tucson like it was drowning in dreams. Like he was drowning in dreams. 

We waited for him to speak. It took a while. Normal social conventions don't apply to people when they're unconscious. The fact that he could talk was just some broken line code in the fabric of the world. 

"Wow," he said at long last. 

"Beautiful, isn't it?" my dad replied. And my little brother shook his head like he just heard the silliest thing in the world. 

"It's terrible," he said. "Awful. Is Mexico always like this?" 

"We're still in America," my dad said back. 

My little brother squinted into the sunset, doubt and derision etched into his face. After a few seconds, both emotions softened, and he nodded in wonder. 

"Eagle feathers," he said, chuckling softly. Like he'd just solved some clever little riddle. Then he fell like an angel into something deeper than sleep. 

𓆙𓆙𓆙

(There is a word for angels that fall.)

𓆙𓆙𓆙

The second time I went to Tucson, I hid from the sun. 

You'd be surprised how easy it is to do down there. Society accommodates it in ways you just won't find anywhere else. When it's 109 outside with single digit humidity, of course you stay indoors. Of course the outdoor markets open at 6 pm, and of course they don't close until 11. Of course. You make the sun mean enough, and everyone becomes a vampire. 

So I roamed the streets at night, kicking up red gravel, watching coyotes wander in between the sea of strip malls. Strip malls are such an Arizonan atrocity. Nobody bothers to build up because there’s nothing to be gained from density. The city will never be walkable, because the problem isn’t infrastructure. It's the sun. And you can't solve the sun, so you might as well lean into driving. Mash the whole city flat and crawl through the dust like rattlers. 

(I met a man once, by the canals, that said the strip malls were some sort of American curse upon the inheritors of Johnny Appleseed. There's one God in this world, he said, and it's the god of don't-eat-apples. But then we invented apple pie and gave it to everyone. So this is our hell.)

Still. It made the days long down there. Lurking at night and hiding all day gives you something like cabin fever. I needed something to do outside. Something that was outside, but also, somehow, inside. What's inside and outside at the same time? What kind of klein-flask ouroboros nonsense fits that bill?

Kartchner caverns. 

𓆙𓆙𓆙

I wouldn't say the caves were like walking into Dante's hell - more like finishing the journey. At some point in my life, I'd blown past limbo, lust, gluttony, greed, and anger. I'd spent two decades plus change living in the fires of heresy. Every layer past would only get colder. 

And each step into that cave did. 

My tour guide and psychopomp was a friendly old man. Familiar in the way that all old people feel familiar to me. I view the world more as a pile of metaphors. He viewed it primarily as water-soluble minerals. 

It was a good work dynamic. 

"These here," he said, gesturing to a long, slender series of impossibly frail stalactites, "are called soda straws."

They were beautiful. I can wax poetic at the keyboard, but in real life, my exclamation of wonder is primarily Hot Damn.

"Hot damn," I said, and he nodded good naturedly. 

"They're pretty fun aren't they? Took a few eons to make 'em but I think it was worth the wait."

I was charmed by the way he talked. I knew it was just a fluke of tenses, but there was something funny about the way he described them - as if he personally oversaw each of the dainty little spires. We went further, and he pointed out more formations as we came across them. 

"Behold!" he said just a few feet further. "Fried eggs!" 

And I had to admit: There were fried eggs. 

"Behold!" he said further still. "A shield!"

And lo, there was a shield. It didn't look terribly shieldlike, but who knows - maybe he made the shields first and got better as he went along. The eggs were beautiful.

We kept walking, deeper, and deeper into the cave. At the surface, it had been hot enough for my sweat to dry into a stinging white powder. Down there it was cold enough to see my breath. The feeling of descending into hell was replaced with the feeling of being swallowed by some ancient, fossilized snake. 

"We call this serpent-stone," he said, gesturing to an expanse of wall. 

And then all I could see was the snake that was swallowing me. 

Now, I want to bring something up right about now. At this point, you might be tempted to write off the unease that I was feeling as claustrophobia. Which would make sense - caves unsettle a lot of people. But not me. I'm borderline claustrophilic. When I was a child, I didn't feel comfortable reading until I was wedged somewhere. Behind a shelf, or in a cabinet, or even underneath the beanbag my parents had intended for sitting. Those were my happy places. I liked being crammed into tight spaces. 

I did not like that cave. 

The section of serpent-stone narrowed the further we went. The room started off maybe six feet wide, but eventually it narrowed down. First to five, then four, then three. Two. And it didn’t stop at one. 

The old man put me in front at that point. Said that if I got stuck, he could just push me forward. Didn't occur to me until I'd gone another hundred feet forward, sideways, that maybe getting dragged out would be better. But I was strangely reluctant to bring it up. I’d already let myself get cornered. There was nothing to be gained from letting him know my thoughts. 

But the only way to keep them secret was by going forward. So I poured myself through the crack, slick as slip.  

There's a grain to the scales of serpent-stone, both in the shape of the formations and in the texture of the individual pieces. They're metamorphic, but there's enough sediment left to ‘em that they have a grain. They bite when you go one way, and slide when you go the other. It felt like I was ratcheting myself in. Even if I could slip forward more, I didn't think I could go back. Not without wearing myself down into something skinless and screaming. 

Water began to pool up in sections. It was cold enough to avoid the stink that still waters normally carry, but things stranger than algae festered in the waters beneath my feet. The puddles felt thick, almost slimy. A dozen steps later I saw little ropes of the stuff trickling down my feet. 

Eventually, it got so narrow I couldn't turn my head. I could still hear the old man behind me, but only through little things - the occasional sharp inhale, or steps just an eighth of a beat off from my own. But never words. I remember stopping at one point, just to get pushed, just to know he was there. And he refused. All I heard for fifteen minutes was his breathing behind me. 

He'd called my bluff. There was nowhere to go but forward. 

𓆙𓆙𓆙

I don't know why it took so long to get dark down there. I wasn't carrying a flashlight, and if the old man had been carrying one, I'd have seen it bob with his steps. There was a sort of soft glow to everything but that had faded hour by hour. Eventually it didn't matter that I couldn't turn my head sideways - I wouldn't have been able to see the man if he'd been two inches in front of me. I walked, and I walked, and I walked, and just when I was about to get stuck for real - stuck in a way where I wouldn't be able to step forward, where I'd have to be pushed (or dragged back along the sharpness of the scales) - I popped out of the serpent stone crevasse like a cork from a bottle. 

Plunk. 

I can't tell you the relief that I felt at that moment. It didn't matter that I didn't know where I was, or how I got there. I'd never been claustrophobic in my life, but at that moment, I couldn't stand even the proximity of the crevice. I scrambled forward, stumbling over the rough cave floor, desperate and eager to find the next wall. To get some sense of where I was. 

I never did. Even as I calmed down, even as the relief of being free of that infernal vice sat upon me like a crown, I never found another wall. Anywhere. I walked until fear made me crawl, as low and blind as any worm. I crawled until my pants tore and my knees bled and my spine ached. 

And I found nothing. 

When the vastness of the space truly sank in, when I realized that leaving that first wall had been a mistake, I turned back. But some choices can't be unmade. There were no walls. Not anymore. No matter how far I crawled, how hard I tried, there was no end. There was nothing but perfect darkness, broken stone, and endless snaking trickles of cold cavern water. 

I dipped a finger in one of the rivulets. Just to feel it. Just to ground myself in something. I felt the waters slither past, and I found something like sight in their motion. 

Water always goes down. Whatever else I lacked down here in the stone, in that moment, I knew up and down. And for the first time in hours, I had a choice. A real choice. No instinct or panic or too late realizations: Up or down. 

I went down. 

𓆙𓆙𓆙

I’d visited a rope factory once. Watched the threads dance and spin and weave into something mighty. I got a blind man’s sense of that from my trickle. I felt it meet more of its kind, braiding into them like thread. I liked pretending it was still my rivulet, but eventually, I had to admit it was lost in the mess. Picking out one thread from a rope would be easy, compared to picking out one trickle from a river. 

Funny how water can drown in itself. 

The first contaminant to the water was iron. I could smell it in the air -  strong as blood. It should have unsettled me, but I’d smelled water like that before. My grandpas well-water stained everything it touched rusty red. His sinks, his showers, his fields. Even his teeth. He was wealthy enough that he could've wiped the stains off decades back, but he told me once that he liked the way it made other people uncomfortable. The way it reminded everyone who saw him smile that by sacrament or soil, they too drank of god. 

The next contaminant was the thick water from before. Apparently, the stagnant pools weren’t as still as I’d thought. Somehow, over strange eons, they too could seep through the stone and make their way into this deep river. It was scentless, but I could feel it catch around my ankles on some steps. It seemed like a memory from a different life. I just didn’t feel like the same person that crawled through the serpent-stone crack. I was just some stranger wearing his shed skin. 

Then at long last came a smell of deep sulphur 🜏. It was an odd contrast with the sharply cold air, and the strangely warm waters. It was the least pleasant of the bunch, but I endured it well. I followed until the tears streaming down my cheeks felt as normal as breathing. Until the rush of the river was replaced by the pounding of waves. 

I’d arrived on a beach. I couldn’t see the ocean in front of me, but I could hear how vast it had to be. There was a terrible stench, worse than the sulphur - the smell of some vast death. Godly carrion. A wound in the world long left to fester. 

I sat there on the beach of that ocean. Afraid to let those dark waters touch me. Thinking and waiting and worrying about what would happen next. 

A voice spoke just twenty feet behind me. I recognized it. I never would’ve recognized it before, but there was a knack to the way this place wore me thin. Like a razor getting sharpened instead of a shirt going ratty. 

“You’re very close,” the old man said, and I remembered him from all those years ago - sitting cross-legged in the moonlight by the bank of the canal. Looking up at me, eyes dark, and calling me over to tell me a secret. 

There's one God in this world, he said then. One God. And it's the god of don't-eat-apples. But then we invented apple pie and gave it to everyone. 

So this is our hell.

𓆙𓆙𓆙

I turned around. I don’t know why. I shouldn’t have been able to see him. I shouldn’t have been able to see anything. But I could see the outline of where he was on that shoreline. Not as a  bright thing, but as a darker shade of absence. A little hole in the dark. 

I could have run. But that would’ve required taking my eyes off him, and at that moment I couldn’t bear the thought. He was the only thing to see down there. The only reason I had eyes. But somehow, more important than the joy of seeing was the feeling that as long as I kept my eyes on him, he was trapped. Pinned to this world like a butterfly on cork. 

There was a half second pause. The voice was a memory, but seeing through the gaps was new to me. The thing in front of me wasn’t an old man. It wasn’t even good at pretending. I was oddly embarrassed that I’d ever been fooled by it. What I was looking at was something older than this cave. Something trapped down here so long it could not bear the thought of light. The dream of something dead. The sloughed skin of a snake. 

The first apple eater. 

I could see shades of absence. More than the hole in the dark. I could look at the thing and feel the place where its wings should have been. Its first ones, at least. 

It lunged for me. 

I’d forgotten it could do that. 

It slammed into me like the water from the bottom of a dam. The power was nothing compared to the cold. I couldn’t see a thing, but what I could feel made bile climb up my throat. 

It was melting. Running down itself in little streams, like snow melting in the sun. Like the river I followed all the way down here. A hand ran over my face and I could feel it pouring into me, and in my fury I did the only thing I could think of: I reached up, and I wrapped my hands around its neck, and I clenched so hard that I could feel the tendons in my wrist sawing up through my skin, taut as piano wire. 

It was like squeezing wet clay. It deformed under my touch, stretching longer and thinner and smoother even as the muscular length of his impossibly long body wrapped around me. At some point the fists beating on my chest turned into wings. Stolen wings, to replace the ones that were stolen from it, and there was a scream in the cave it was so awful that it wasn’t mine. 

It was a terrible race. We were killing each other the same way. There was no question about someone dying here in front of the empty throne of god. I just didn’t want it to be me. 

Eventually, it could stretch no more, and my hands could crush more than just nightmare and shadow. The wings beat on me weaker, and weaker, until eventually some cartilage in its great neck snapped under the pressure of my thumbs.

It was like cracking a glow stick. There was a flash of light, brief as thunder, and I could see the waves in front of me. An ocean of rotting meat and bones. The outline of some great, dead serpent, fifty feet tall. And a tower of dead bodies, stretching back to ages that I could not recognize. The only corpses I could recognize were those at the top, with their strange helmets and iconic breastplates. 

Conquistadors. 

When the light went out, the body went with it. Most dreams don’t leave anything behind. Even when they’re made by gods. 

𓆙𓆙𓆙

I don’t know how I left the cave. 

I followed the river up. At some point, it stopped being the river I followed down. The tributaries feeding into it spread out like a fan, and fool that I am, I kept picking left. It shouldn’t have worked. Part of me wonders if I somehow bent the river to my will. Filled in for the dead thing bobbing in the lake, or the echo that I strangled on that starless shore. 

Or maybe I just got lucky. 

I can remember finally breaching the incline and seeing an exit into the desert. Not the one I stepped in through, but good enough. I can remember getting closer and closer, before stepping out into the burning sun. I thought it was finally over.

I thought wrong.  

I can remember looking into the bright blue sky and seeing exactly what my little brother saw on that drive all those years back. 

I don’t know what I killed down in the cave. Some dead thing in the dark, dreaming it was alive. An altar of blood and bone, designed to hold a fragment. 

But the real thing sat there in the sky. Curled up so tight and so smooth, you could mistake it for a ball. Waiting, and watching, and hating. Alive but dreaming death. The mould that stamped out the form of what lay in the cave. 

Quetzalcoatl, I learned later. The feathered serpent. 

I moved the month after that. Went somewhere north, somewhere cold, somewhere that a snake wouldn’t follow. Most days now, I look up, and I just see the sun. A flaming ball of gas. A little, red, star. 

But only most.

𓆙𓆙𓆙

𓆙𓆙𓆙

𓆙𓆙𓆙

𓆙𓆙𓆙

𓆙𓆙𓆙 𓇳

Thanks to @qsatisfaction and @foldingfittedsheets for being my editors on this piece. And thanks to @dr-robert-chase-apologist for providing the prompt.

[northopalshore]

Union persona chart

ପ observations iii ଓ

This is a collection of aspects I've observed in the Union (1585) persona chart based on people I've met in real life & a few celebrities. Result may vary depending on the sign, house and degree each aspect is in but this post still counts as a base for understanding the aspects listed below.

♡ Union persona chart Masterlist | Masterlist

⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*

☕ Mercury trine Saturn you'll think that your partner is someone mature who is mature and emotionally stable.

☕Mercury conjunct Boda (1487) you'll think that your partner is marriage material & may plan on marrying them from the get go

☕Juno in °22 degree meeting your significant other will change your life drastically, I'd like to call this the Cinderella placement!

☕7th house ruler in the 12th house almost always means either a long-distance relationship, private relationship or secret relationship (or all three!)

☕ Juno in the 7th & 10th house means you're going to meet through some sort of work either theirs or yours

☕ 7th house ruler in the 2nd house or 8th house you'll meet them through a money or service related venture (your spouse is likely the one providing the service)

☕ Venus square Saturn when you meet, you may think that this isn't the best time to start a relationship or be in love. You might've refrained from being in any relationships as well up to this point. It's literally breaking the "relationship fast" you have.

Sun conjunct Part of Fortune you may meet them while getting a promotion, or a new project/role.

☕ Sun conjunct Uranus you will not expect to meet someone like them or someone of their status. This is a star-crossed lovers aspect. They may be a boost to your current status as well. (I think Lisa has this in her Union persona chart)

☕ Moon conjunct North Node you may feel like meeting them was a part of destiny especially due to the circumstances of your meeting.

☕ Mars trine Jupiter when you first meet, it's very likely that you'll be seeing them quite often /almost everyday in person, whether through work, school or a shared project. You will be together, or at least see each other quite often.

☕ Mercury trine Chiron talking to them will be very healing to you, you could talk very often and openly, sharing your trauma and past experiences. You'll find that you may share a lot of similarities in that area.

☕ Venus conjunct Juno you may think of them as your ideal partner or idealise them a lot especially when first getting to know each other (dating).

☕ Sun square Mars/Saturn you may feel rather restrained around them, or may not be able to ease up much around them because of nervousness, or timidity. You may act more "mature" around them at first or less crazy than usual (lol).

☕ Jupiter conjunct Chiron being around them may trigger a lot of insecurities within you, perhaps you may feel "lesser" than them in some way.

☕ Pluto conjunct Starr (4150)

depending on the house it's in, being with them may push you to stardom or you may gain money/ popularity. It's not always favorable to see however; you may be known for a tumultuous love life as well depending on other placements/factors. (Priscilla Presley has this placement in the 2nd house. )

⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*

☕ Neptune square North/South Node they will come as a surprise to you, they are likely different from the type of person you expect to meet or different from the people you used to date

☕ Venus trine Neptune romance with them will make you feel giddy, and a part of you may feel like it's too good to be true

☕ Jupiter in the 12th house you may travel to them a lot or travel just to see them often, even after dating

☕ North Node conjunct Midheaven (MC)

being with them will change your reputation, whether in your career, public or both. You might feel like they give you direction as well. A new door; a new life.

☕ Moon conjunct Juno you will feel like they are your perfect match, your soulmate. " Finally, someone gets me."

☕ Chiron conjunct ascendant

you may think it's a risky move to be with them, or being with them may hurt your reputation in a way.

☕ Sun conjunct Boda

meeting them may make you think of marriage or long-term commitment. ( sniper sniper sniper sniper, wifey wifey wifey wifey)

☕ Moon square Mercury you might not share a lot of your true feelings with them or might hold your tongue a lot at first ( either because of trust issues or caution). You may also find it difficult to see each other on the same level and get offended easily (both sides).

☕ Venus opposite Pluto they will change your mind about love when you meet them or seem like a knight in shining armor amongst disappointments and heartbreaks

☕ Sun trine Moon there is an immediate compatibility, also like you've met before or seem like childhood friends (even though you've never met)

☕ Sun conjunct Venus love at first sight!

☕ Sun conjunct Jupiter in the 3rd house you will enjoy long conversations when you meet your future spouse, you feel like there is much to talk about together & have a lot in common. You may also be online a lot when you meet them.

☕ Sun conjunct Mercury you may make the first move when you feet them i.e start the conversation

☕ Lilith trine Uranus your relationship will help push you be more authentic towards yourself and others, you feel seen on a very personal level (respect s your individuality).

☕ Sun conjunct Jupiter ( in the 11th house) you might be gaining popularity when your first meet them or meeting them will cause a boost in your popularity. In the 11th house, it might be related to your online presence or reputation.

☕ Mercury opposite Mars you will be very hesitant to make any moves towards your person, or you might not think that they would strike up the first conversation (did not expect).

⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*:⋆⋆°.☾⋆.ೃ࿔*

Thanks for reading ♡

@northopalshore

@northopalshore union persona chart 2025 all rights reserved.

Support ?

[n1ght0f-nyx]

simon riley headcanons- returning home to you

simon riley x reader headcanons

He’s not used to the quiet. The first few nights, he has trouble sleeping because he’s so used to the hum of machinery, distant gunfire, or the chatter of his squad. You often wake up to find him sitting at the edge of the bed, lost in thought.

His hands are always reaching for his gear, even when it’s not there. You’ll catch him unconsciously checking for a weapon he doesn’t need. It takes time for him to relax his instincts.

He still wakes up early out of habit, but instead of rushing to gear up, he just watches you sleep, memorizing the peace in your expression.

He isn’t the best with words, but his love is shown through touch—tight, lingering hugs, a hand on your lower back when walking, or resting his head against yours when he’s feeling particularly vulnerable.

The first time you cup his face after he gets home, he leans into your touch like a starved man. It’s been too long since he’s felt something so gentle.

The mask comes off more often at home, though it still takes time. If you ask him to, he won’t hesitate, but he likes it when you don’t pressure him.

He’s protective—almost overbearingly so. You go to the store alone? He’s tense until you’re back. You mention someone acting suspicious on the street? He’s scanning for threats next time you step outside together.

At first, he forgets how to just be at home. You find him pacing sometimes, restless, unsure of what to do without an objective. It helps when you give him small tasks—cooking dinner together, fixing something around the house, or even just watching a show with you.

If you make a habit of reading or watching TV at night, he eventually joins you. He doesn’t always follow the plot, but he likes the routine of sitting beside you, feeling normal for a change.

Loud noises still make his heart jump, but he hides it well. If you’re holding his hand when it happens, you feel the way his fingers tighten slightly before he forces himself to relax.

He has nightmares, but he tries to keep them to himself. The first time you wake him from one, he flinches away instinctively before realizing it’s you. He hates that. You start waking him more gently, murmuring his name, grounding him before he jolts awake.

He appreciates when you don’t push him to talk about things. Some days, he can open up a little—mentioning a funny moment with his team or something that happened on a mission. Other days, he just wants to exist beside you, no questions asked.

If he leaves again, he always leaves something of his behind for you—his old dog tags, a hoodie, something small but important. It’s his way of making sure a part of him stays with you.

He’s fiercely loyal. The thought of losing you after everything else he’s endured terrifies him. He doesn’t say it often, but when he does, it’s raw and heavy: “I don’t wanna lose you too.”

He rarely asks for comfort outright, but when he finally lets himself rest his head in your lap, or lets you hold him close after a hard night, it means the world to him.

[thanosscross]

Your Man - Choi Seung Hyun/T.O.P X Race Car Driver! Reader

Summary: After Y/n L/n starts to rise to fame with her new racing career, she ends up in contact with an older celebrity, Seung Hyun, leading to one of the best things to ever happen to you, even if he was a little older.

Warnings: The highly requested, age gap story, lovelies! Reader is 23-24 and Seung Hyun is 36-37, so quite a gap, but everybody is of legal age! <3 other than that, I feel like it's mainly just fluff and angst with a hint of plot, so please enjoy lovelies <3

Whenever you entered your early twenties, you had high hopes, you had just graduated college, and your training to finally go on the race tracks for your agency. You knew from a very young age who you wanted to be, a race car driver, and you stuck with that idea throughout your childhood and teen years, until you finally made your idea a reality, becoming one of the newest drivers in this year of races.

Along with new found fame with your profession, you also came into contact with a lot of different famous people, people you felt were a lot more famous than you, but nonetheless they were still fans of yours. Including one person who ended up gaining your interest and almost all of your attention at first, Choi Seung Hyun, an older retired Idol, and actor. You didn't care that he was older, a lot older than you, he was sweet, and you both clicked together immediately, always talking in your free time, showing your new friend all your new car adjustments, seeing all of the artwork he had made or purchased, or just talking about upcoming events for you both. It didn't take very long for you both to develop feelings for each other, Seung Hyun was very, very skeptical at first, not wanting to cause any more drama or upstir with social media, especially not your fans, for being with someone who was 23 while he was 36. With your persistence and reassurance for a few months, Seung Hyun and Y/n L/n had finally made things official though, you both deciding to just come out with it to the media, before someone else got the chance to spoil it for you both.

So now you were going a year strong, you had your issues every now and then, but you both were each other's home, somewhere you felt safe, no matter where you were, what the environment was like, you'd always be home with each other.

As you laid on your apartment floor, you huffed, looking up towards your boyfriend who was visiting from South Korea, who was currently having an argument with himself in his head about how to bring up something to you. "Jagiya..are you okay?" You whispered, running a hand through your f/c dyed hair, it being part of your contract for promotional and appearance purposes, that you always had to match your style towards your current car, something Seung Hyun secretly hated. "Hmm?..Oh, I'm sorry, Aein, yea, yea I'm okay, why?" He replied after a moment, glancing back down towards you, you smiled softly at him, falling in love with him all over again as his hair fell in front of his glasses slightly. Slowly moving to sit on your knees, resting your hands on his knees as you tilted your head "I can tell somethings bothering you, don't make me pull the full name card" You threatened, giggling loudly as he gave you a confused look, not understanding exactly what you were threatening. As you moved to sit next to him, you smiled "Choi Seung Hyun, what's going on?" You asked softly, Seung Hyun nodded softly as he understood finally what a 'full name card' was, he was slowly catching onto the slang and phrases you used. "Now that my interviews are all wrapped up for now..I was thinking of staying to watch your race coming up?.." He offered nervously, it wasn't something either of you had spoken about before, yes you had been on set with him, often visiting him for his lunch breaks, but he hadn't ever been to one of your races in person. It wasn't because he didn't want to, of course he wanted to be there to support his #1 girl, but being seen like that in public felt very real for the both of you, it would just confirm everything and multiply any hate you'd get for your age gap. "R-Really? That'd be amazing, Jagiya! Please! Oh it'd be so awesome having you there! Everybody on my pit crew already loves you!" You rambled excitedly, placing your hands on his cheeks as he smiled at you, you looked absolutely beautiful to him, all the time, but especially whenever you were excited about something. "I'd love to, Aein, anything for my girl" He smiled softly, blushing still as you pressed your lips against his gently, resting one of your hands on his chest as you moved your lips against his. "Thank you! thank you" You cheered as you slowly pulled away, Seung Hyun laughing softly as you were still just as hyped up after the kiss you just had.

As Seung Hyun held you gently as you slept, he couldn't help but let his mind wander on how exactly he ended up with you. You were a famous 24-year-old American race car driver, and he was a retired 'controversial' 37-year-old actor, you could literally date any person you wanted, you were absolutely stunning, but you still chose him? He couldn't understand it, yes, he absolutely loved being with you, and loved loving you, but he just couldn't understand why out of everybody, you decided to be with him. The longer he let his mind ponder the thought, he could feel himself starting to doze, eventually falling asleep as he kept his arms around you, feeling a lot more comfortable with you close to him.

The next week would be hectic, none of your training or promotional gigs going as planned the week of the race, first your wheel malfunctions as your taking the first curve of the track during practice, then an interviewer starts asking wayyy too personal questions, and of course, to top it off, your brakes for some reason, stopped working, mid final practice. You were starting to lose hope until the day of the biggest race in your career currently, Daytona 500, as you walked out onto the track, finding your way towards your pit crew and family who were separated by a barricade, keeping press and other drivers' families away from the cars and track. As you approached the area, you frowned, seeing your mom, dad, and pit crew, but no Seung Hyun anywhere to be found "Hey mom, have you seen Seung Hyun? He said he'd be here" You asked, using the bar of the barricade to lift yourself up slightly to try and spot your boyfriend, but still, nothing.

Seung Hyun sat on a small platform above the starting line, he wanted to be with your family by the track, but after a few hundred people swarmed him at the entrance, security grabbed him away from the crowd, hiding him in the one spot they could think of at the moment. As you looked around, you finally sighed, glancing at your parents, shrugging sadly before turning towards the press, ready to get the race started, and hopefully figure out where the hell he is. While you spoke to the press, you failed to notice your boyfriend quickly moving across the empty track, two security guards escorting him towards your family finally. Moving back over to your car, you smiled brightly seeing the familiar face of Seung Hyun "Jegiya! I thought you wouldn't make it" You smiled brightly, leaning over the gate to hug him tightly, ignoring your mom's judgmental look, sure she supported you, but that didn't mean she liked the idea of you being with a much older man. "Of course I'd make it, I wanna see my aein kick some ass" He smiled brightly, cupping your cheeks as he pressed a quick kiss to your lips before all racers were called to their cars.

Climbing in through the window, you made sure to clip on your helmet, making sure your coms worked before starting up your engine, waiting for the greenlight from your pit crew to move over to the starting line. "Y/n, this is going to a smooth race, don't let this week get to you, all that matters right now is getting through this race" your Crew Chief, Jacob, said through your headset, causing you to shake your head gently "I know, I'm gonna try and make this one my best one yet, let's just keep everything quick, smooth, and keep lines open" You replied, pressing the small buttons on your helmet to start your playlist, 'Case 143' by Stray Kids starting to blast through your headphones as you watched the flag holder closely, getting ready to line up with the pace car.

The first thirty laps were going smoothly, you made your way from 27th place all the way up to fourth place without any issues. You knew most of the other drivers, either training with them, or just meeting them at different races, but there were still a handful you had never met, including the driver in fifth place behind you. "Y/n, fifth is right on your ass! Be careful!" Jacob shouted, watching nervously as the driver bumped the hood of his car against the rear of yours, causing you to lose control for a moment, somehow recovering just in time to block him from passing you. "Nice save, hun! Keep that quick mindset and get yourself to first, y/n/n!" He shouted, watching as you zipped past them quickly, your speedometer reading well over 100 miles per hour. As you attempted to pass the car in front of you, you felt your heart fall as you realized you were trapped between the wall and third place driver, along with another car close behind you, basically boxing you in. As you glanced over, you shot the driver a dirty glare, knowing damn well he'll get a penalty if anything happens, so all he was doing was being a dick by trapping you. As you managed to get your car free from his and the wall, you were flung against the seatbelt by another car slamming into your back fender, sending you into a spinning wreck as your car spun out into the turf in the center of the track. "Y/n!? Y/n! Get the hell back on the track!" Jacob pleaded, begging every god out there for you to fucking move already, you wouldn't be able to though, your padded suit and leg getting caught between your seat and gearshift, making it almost impossible to press the gas or breaks "J-Jacob I can't move!" You shouted, starting to panic, feeling a sense of dread as you watched cars starting zip past quickly, if you didn't figure out something quick, you were surely going to lose your spot, and become so far behind, it unfixable. Slamming your other foot on the gas, you felt the car jerk forward, sending you speeding back onto the track as you merged back in with the race.

Seung Hyun could feel his body being consumed by nerves, hating the idea of him not being able to help you in any way, but as you zipped past quickly, passing two other cars in the process, he knew you had this as under control as possible. You could feel your heart start to hammer in your chest as you raced side by side with the driver who was currently in first place, your nerves too high to notice any glares or hand gestures he sent towards you through his window. "Now Y/n! Go!" Jacob screamed into the headset, noticing you only had one curve left to pass this guy or else the race would end in a tie, or with you in second "I'm going!" You shouted, growling whenever the driver next to you did the same thing, both of you speeding up as you whipped around the corner quickly. As you pressed harder on the gas, you could feel the pain in your leg start become a lot worse, but your mind was only focusing on two things. Winning, and the sounds of Seung Hyun in the background of Jacob's chants, cheering you on to be badass and to take the gold. As you passed the driver, taking on first place, your tires crossed the finish line, causing cheers to erupt from everywhere, the stands, barricade line, and your headset. Taking a victory lap to help slow down your high speeds before parking, letting the panic wash over you as you realized how much pain you were truly in from your leg being stuck. As you glanced down, you tried your best to assess the damage without freaking yourself out more, your knee was stuck between the gear shift and seat, and your foot was twisted in an unnatural way as it was caught in the track on your seat. “J-Jacob, I-I’m stuck bad, I need a medic” you whimpered, trying desperately to pry your helmet off of your head so you could at least get some freedom “okay, okay! We’ve got a medic on her way, we’re gonna try and get you out of the car until then okay?” His voice came through the coms as you tried your best to pry the plastic pieces apart to free your knee at least, only causing you even more pain.

The minute Seung Hyun realized you weren’t getting out of your car and something was wrong, he threw himself over the barricade, rushing along side Jacob to the driver side of your car. “Aein, baby, are you okay?” He asked frantically, reaching through the open window to hold onto your shaking hands gently. “I-i’m…chilling” you whimpered, trying not to cry or panic in front of him, knowing it’d just make him panic and start dismantling your car to get you out, even if it meant totaling it out. “Are you bleeding? What happened?” He continued rambling, not stepping back until the medics pulled him back, as he watched from a few feet away, he made eye contact with your parents, feeling a new kind of anxiousness filling his body as his mind started to spiral. Moving to rush over to your parents to swap them spots, feeling like it was more of your parents’ place to be there, waiting, instead of him. Your mother huffed giving him a confused look “What’re you doing, dear!? Why aren’t you staying over there?!” Your mother asked, tilting her head as she watched him nervously stop in his tracks “I-i, your h-her mom and dad-“ he started to ramble, your mother wasn’t stupid, and she knew exactly how Seung Hyun felt, you weren’t the only one who had started dating an older man, and while she didn’t like it, she wasn’t going to become her own mother. “Honey, she needs you. She’s going to want to see you for comfort as soon as she’s out of that car, so I’m telling you as your future mother in law, go take care of my daughter.” She demanded, watching as her words kind of gave Seung Hyun the push he needed to get into a non-panicked mindset, rushing back over to your car as the medics slowly helped you out of the car, keeping your leg in a wooden splint to keep it stable.

“Aein! Baby I’m here!” He shouted quickly, rushing past your pit crew and press that now swarmed you, he wrapped his arm around you gently, following the medics as he helped you support yourself as you walked with him.

After being sent from the medical building, to the actual hospital, you were finally able to return back home to your apartment, much to your relief. As you laid on your bed, you glared at the bright f/c cast that sat on your leg going from your thigh all the way to your toes, covering your knee, ankle, and foot to help it in the healing process. “You know..glaring won’t make it go away” your boyfriend whispered, his voice still heavenly to your ears as he slowly made his way from the doorway to his spot next to you in bed. “I hate it, you know they said I can’t drive for eight months, if not longer!?” You gasped dramatically, cupping his cheeks “I’m going to die! I swear! How the fuck am I supposed to live laugh and love in these conditions? Honestly?” You ranted, motioning to your leg “because I am not living! Laughing! Or loving! And it’s criminal damnit!” You continued, not noticing your boyfriend’s beyond confused face at all of your phrases that you were throwing around. It wasn’t that Seung Hyun was bad at English, he had actually gotten a lot better since he started talking with you almost daily, but he did get confused about certain things you’d say, one of them being you calling things criminal, how was your leg being broken criminal? Was breaking your leg actually illegal in America? Surely not, but, if not why was it criminal? “Are you going to jail?” He asked softly, feeling his heart starting to break as he genuinely started to believe the longer you rant, the more illegal, and criminal it was to break your leg “Wha-..? Oh Jegiya, my love no!” You giggled, catching your mistake almost as soon as you saw his overly worried expression “h-how is that criminal then?..” he asked tilting his head slightly as he leaned back against the pillows, pulling you close, all while being cautious of your cast and leg.

“It’s just a thing..that people say I guess, it’s not actually criminal though, Jegiya, I promise” you smiled, not being able to hold back your giggles as he nodded gently. You couldn’t help it, he was so damn adorable whenever he was confused like this, it just made you want to hug him and never let go. “Is there anything I can do for you, love?” Seung Hyun whispered after a moment, tracing his fingers over your shoulder as he let out a deep breath “Just you, Jegiya” you whispered, holding onto him tightly as you closed your eyes, letting yourself relax “hey Y/n?…” he whispered gently, causing you to tilt your head up gently to meet his gaze “I’m proud of you, you’re like..the coolest badass I know” he smiled softly, pressing his lips to your forehead gently “ya know, ever since I showed you the word badass in English, you’ve been calling me it every five seconds” you laughed, watching as he just shrugged in reply “because you’re a badass, I’m just saying the truth” he replied playfully, starting to run his fingers through your hair as he took another breath “Aein…how would you feel about getting a home here together?” He asked after a moment, you sat up, tilting your head, silently asking him to repeat himself just to make sure you heard him correctly, after getting confirmation that, yes, he did want to get a house with you, you smiled brightly. “I would be so excited!! Please! I’d love it so much” you smiled, hugging him tightly as you smiled, as you laid there for a little longer, Seung Hyun had one last question for you, it starting to chip away at him way too much for him to stay quiet any longer.

“Why did you ask me out?..like, out of everybody in this world, why some weird guy who’s way older than you? Wouldn’t you want somebody your age? Who’s able to keep up with you?” He rambled, causing you to sit up again, this time highly offended, how fucking dare he, not only questioning your judgement, but also talking down towards himself? What the fuck. “Stop. Just stop it Seung Hyun. I like my weird guy, he’s weird like me, and it makes him fun to be around” you started your lecture, taking his hand in yours gently as you spoke “and for the other stuff? I’ve told you, my love. The same reason you like me, I didn’t fall in love with your age or name, I fell in love with you, and your personality, and trust me, handsome, you keep up with me better than anybody, you’re amazing” you giggled, biting your bottom lip teasingly as he rolled his eyes towards you jokingly “I just mean-“ you cut him off before he could even start his protests “Choi Seung Hyun. I love you.” You demanded, not knowing how to get it through to him without just stating how you truly felt towards him. “Y/n…” he whispered, trying to think of what to say as his anxiety started to take over his body “I love you too” he whispered, pressing his lips against yours, moving his with yours as he gently placed his hands on your side and cheek.

You weren’t sure what was going to happen after you recovered, but you were 100% sure about one thing, just like you were sure about being a race car driver, you were going to marry this man. As you pulled away slowly, you rested a hand on his cheek gently “I’m so sleepy, I just wanna lay here with you” you whispered tiredly, moving to lay your head on his chest, tracing shapes onto his chest as you felt yourself starting to doze “well I would be too, Aein, you had one hell of a day” he replied, continuing to run his fingers through your hair as you slowly fell asleep, leaving Seung Hyun to his own thoughts before finally falling asleep himself.

—

What do we think lovelies? You like? I’m so sorry it’s been awhile, like I said a few days ago, I’ve been stuck in a small rut feeling as if my stories haven’t been coming out that well at all, that or they’re just not good ideas at all, so I tried my best with this one as I’m trying to just push through that rut, trying to keep in mind every artist will always be their biggest critic, but it’s been a little difficult but you lovelies are always such a big help and support 💕 While I'm very nervous to start posting the stories I'm iffy about, your guys' support is definitely helping me through it all, so thank you all truly, for everything you've done for me, it means the world, and universe. 💕💕 I’ve gotten quite a bit of asks and messages about an Age Gap story with Seung Hyun and a younger reader, so please! Please! Please! Let me know what you think, next to be posted is my ‘stepdad! Ji-Yong x single mother! Reader’ story, which I’m very excited about so stay tuned lovelies! maybe after that a part two to this if you'd like? Or another age gap story if you'd like? Let me know! <3 I love you 🫶🫶 and I’m excited to hear from you!! 🫶💕

—

Taglist!!

@onyxmango

@ag02212023

@acehasmyheart

@mitchko11

@learninglinesintherainn

@seunghyunwifey

@jajabro

@heartsforseo

@lilou0401

@maenoakasuna

@ericityyy

@frangiipanii

@seunghyunwifey

@sturnioloslut-b

@isssaaaa2111

@goodnight-n-go-home

@skzdreamz

@enhasrii

@sunhyeswife

@ilovethe141

@saraaisfree

@sassyyoyo

@i-might-be-vanny

@cheese10001

@live-laugh-lovef1

@c1delight

@blue-sky336

@sherrayyyyy

@forevervibezzzz1

@mirahyun

[angelltheninth]

Hey I saw your different types of love confessions, I’m not sure if you wanted specific ones for each character or one type of confession for each character… but nonetheless it would be cute to see them if the Batboys, however you feel like!

Don't worry, I have an idea of what to do with this one.

Pairing: Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Tim Drake, Damian Wayne x Reader

Tags: fluff, developing relationship, love confession, first kiss, cuddles, flirting, realization of feelings

Ko-Fi | Rules | Fandoms and Characters | Commissions

A/N: Love the Batboys letting themselves feel love and be loved. They need that a whole lot in canon.

Dick writes you a note confessing his feelings, it takes him several days but he's trying to get it just right. There are a lot of feelings that he has about you so rather than just one piece of paper it ends up as several. By the time he's done it's not so much a note as it is an essay. Might be easier to just tell you his feelings instead. And he would if his brothers didn't rat him out and pushed him to give you the... love essay since he spent so much time writing it.

Jason acts like it's no big deal that he has feelings for you. A crush is a passing thing and he thought it would leave him after you've been fooling around for a few months, but it only caused his feelings to increase. It's fine, no big deal, he just, you know, really cares about you and he wants you to know that in case he dies again and doesn't get to say it. But don't blow this confession out of proportion, it's not the first time he's fallen in love, might be the last though.

Tim didn't mind getting all cuddly with you on the couch when you asked him to stay the night. The two of you have been flirting back and forth for some time, but neither really voices your feelings out loud. It was a comfortable state that you were both in, but on the couch and in the relationship. But he was tired, he was cozy, he was all warm and happy with you holding him and so he turned to you, looked you in the eyes and told you he loved you.

Damian kisses you unexpectedly and refuses to elaborate further for weeks. The relationship between you two is left in absolute limbo because he is stubborn and refuses to talk about his feelings. It was up to you to literally trap him and confront him about it and even then he pretended not to know what you were talking about. When he heard that you were asked out by someone else he demanded to know who was flirting with his beloved.

[starkwlkr]

you are my love | cillian murphy

barbenheimer series

“My beautiful boy, my little beautiful boy.” Y/n kissed her baby boy’s cheek repeatedly, earning a giggle from the boy. “My lovely beautiful boy, all mine.”

“Don’t forget me.” Cillian chuckled as he rolled over to face Y/n and Alexander. It was Christmas morning and the Murphy household didn’t have any big plans.

“We can’t forget about daddy. You two are my beautiful boys.” Y/n whispered, holding Alex close to her. “Good mornin’ my love.”

“It’s always a good morning with you two.” Cillian replied, pressing kisses to both Y/n and the baby.

Baby Alex giggled more and tried get his father to carry him. It was truly amazing seeing how Alex was growing everyday, but it made both parents sad. They wanted their little boy to stay little forever.

“Come on then, let’s go make mammy some breakfast then we can open some presents.” Cillian stood up from the bed, putting on his slippers and grabbing Alex from Y/n’s arms.

“I think Alex said he wanted waffles for breakfast.” Y/n smiled cheekily at Cillian. She copied Cillian’s actions and soon the Murphy family was in the kitchen getting breakfast ready.

Y/n picked out a record and placed it on the record player. She had a tradition of always playing the Charlie Brown Christmas album so of course that’s the one she chose to play. When Alex heard the first few notes of the opening song, he smiled at his mother.

“Someone’s a Peanuts fan.” Y/n smiled back at her baby boy. “We could go into town, maybe take Alex to see the lights.” She suggested as she started getting out orange juice from the fridge.

“I think he’ll be mesmerized by them. My mam told me I used to stare at the lights on the tree as if they were the most interesting thing in the world.” Cillian explained.

“You’d like that, right?” Y/n walked towards Cillian and Baby Alex. She grabbed his tiny hand and lightly kissed it repeatedly, Alex bursting out into giggles.

After spending the day listening to Christmas music, opening presents and watching Christmas films, Alexander was exhausted. He was out like a light the second his mother put him down in his crib. Thankfully Alexander was an angel when it came time to go to sleep. After adjusting the baby monitor to the proper settings and leaving the night light on, Y/n walked back to the kitchen to help Cillian clean up.

“I can’t get enough of those little snores! I want him to stay a baby forever.” Y/n started picking up wrapping paper and tossing it into the bin.

“Change diapers forever? I’m not too fond of that,” Cillian teased, continuing with the dishes. “I can already picture you crying when Alex starts his first day of primary school.”

“Like you won’t sob at the sight of him with his school bag and his school uniform. Oh god, he’s going to be so cute in those little uniforms! Thanks for putting that image in my head! Now I’m going to cry even worse when that day finally comes.” Y/n playfully slapped Cillian’s arm.

“You won’t be the only one.” Cillian softly chuckled. Once he was done with the dishes, he dried his hands on the dish towel.

“Speaking of the future . . . I got offered a role. But I haven’t confirmed anything. It’s for DC comics.” Y/n said. It had been a while since she was back on a film set. She couldn’t even remember when her last day filming was.

“If you think I’m going to talk you out, you’re crazy,” Cillian turned to face her. “What role?”

“Harley Quinn. A Suicide Squad movie is being made. I got a script and the complete filming schedule. If I say yes to the role then I would start filming in April next year in Ontario.” Y/n explained.

“That’s great. But by the sound of it, you don’t seem convinced.” Cillian took notice of her facial expression. Y/n did want to return to her job, but the thought of leaving Alexander scared her. If she did say yes then it would be a disaster since Cillian and her would be away filming.

“Alexander needs me.” Y/n sighed. “I feel like I’m a bad mother if I go back to work. He’s just so little! Some mothers wait until their child is entering primary school and then they go back to work! What kind of mother will that make me?”

His expression softened, his hands coming to rest gently on her arms. “A mother who loves her son and her career. A mother who’s allowed to have both.”

She looked down, biting her lip. “But what if it doesn’t work? What if it’s too hard?”

“Then we figure it out,” he said simply. “Together.”

Y/N exhaled shakily, her fingers curling around the fabric of his sweater. “I don’t want this to hurt us. What if it’s too much—being apart, both of us working? What if—”

“Hey,” he interrupted softly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “Nothing is going to make me walk away from this—from us.” He let his hand rest against her cheek, thumb grazing her skin. “We’ll make it work, no matter what. If you take the role, I’ll support you. If you decide to stay home, I’ll support you. You have me either way.”

Her eyes glistened, the weight of her worries easing just a little. “You really think we can do this?”

He smiled, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. “I know we can. We’ve gotten through everything else, haven’t we? We’ll get through this too���together. Because you’re my love.”

As if on cue, Alexander’s cries coming from the baby monitor on the counter interrupted them.

“I love you and Alex so much.” Cillian placed a kiss on her lips before leaving to comfort the crying child.

Maybe it wouldn’t be easy. Maybe it would be messy and complicated. But with Cillian by her side, she knew they’d make it work.

TAGLIST

@leclercloml @butterfly-skinnylegend @rockerchick05 @equallyshaw @agustdpeach @celesteablack @hnybitches @ietss @probablypossesedbysatan @kittyrumbl3r @electrobutterfly @knpgituloh @butlersluvbot @captainwans @bellstwd @theekileypage @marti-su @multifans-things @ceruleanrainblues @litterallnobody @jackierose902109 @sinarainbows @cosniffee @thatgirlthatreadswattpad

[checkeredflagggs]

Febuwhump Day 14: Becoming the Monster

pairings: gen

summary: a story about y/n, Redbull’s new second driver, told in non-sequential order

a/n: I love febuwhump and have participated before for other fandoms but this is a first for me — attempting to compete it via smau only. Hopefully I can write a complete story eventually and I will be posting it on its own masterlist in the correct order to read but it’ll be written based on the febuwhump prompt list! @febuwhump

a/n2: based on the 2024 year; sorry checo but you got replaced earlier!

a/n3: listen I like Lando but I needed a villian here

Masterlist | Taglist

y/n_gossip

liked by user, user, and 1,836,622 others

tagged: y/n_rb, landonorris

y/n_gossip: it seems like little Lando Norris might be thinking of a matador career — he keeps tempting the bulls! After a few close calls with Verstappen, Norris and L/N collided resulting in a DNF for our girl with some pretty harsh words coming from both of their radios afterwards.

view all comments

user1: this is what racing is!

↳user2: I know — I was on the edge of my seat…

user3: pretty harsh?? Girl sounded like she was gonna run him down on foot and take him out

↳user4: lol did you see the rb team after she got back to the garage?

↳user5: they literally just picked her up and moved her away from the reporters 😂😂

user6: oh the post race interviews are gonna slap

↳user7: I can’t wait!

user8: that’s so completely unfair! y/n was ahead at the apex — Lando should have given it away, not crashed into her

↳user9: seriously?? Where on earth did you get that information??

↳user8: uhh by watching the screen??

user10: oh shit….

↳user11: Lando’s post interview??

↳user10: how dare he say something like that???

f1gossip

liked by user, user, and 1,457,987 others

Transcript:

interviewer: and what are your thoughts on y/n and your collision today?

Lando: obviously not ideal. You know you never want to be in a collision- especially when it’s not your fault. Y/N…she should spend less time with Max, don’t need her becoming another monster, ya know…

f1gossip: what an interview! During his post race interview for Austria 2024, where he was forced to dnf after two different collisions with both Redbulls, Norris didn’t hold back his thoughts. During this brief moment, he talked about the close friendship between this year’s Redbull drivers — saying that y/n (a rookie) should take a step back from her more senior teammate because no one “[needed] her becoming another monster,”. He also went on to say that he was losing respect for Verstappen and the way he raced.

view all comments

user12: did he really just fucking say that?

↳user13: oh my god he did

↳user14: it’s even worse when you actually watch it because you can just barely see max next to him — when Norris said this, both max and the interviewer froze

↳user13: i mean i would too. That’s a really harsh thing to say about someone

user15: people want cunty f1 back again but can’t handle this little spat??

↳user16: cunty? Yes. Whatever this was? Absolutely not

user17: he’s just salty she’s better then him

↳user18: how do you figure that??

↳user17: she literally won her very first f1 race? He’s been racing for years and only just won his first this year

↳user18: it doesn’t count really. Everyone knows that redbull cheats

↳user17: oh my god just shut up

user20: i feel bad for y/n…it really wasn’t her fault nor did it affect lando too much but he’s (someone she’s said she looks up too before) putting her on blast with some pretty harsh words…

↳user21: she looks up to him??

↳user20: yeah! She’s said multiple times that she really admires how open he is talking about his mental health and that she really wanted to emulate him

↳user21: oh ouch…then today and that interview has got to hurt…

user22: anyone else interested in what she’s gonna do to retaliate?

↳user23: 🙋🏾‍♀️🙋🏾‍♀️

Private Messages, Max and y/n

Taglist

@anamiad00msday @suns3treading @daniskywalkersolo @awritingtree @justheretoreadthxxs @coral7161 @lost4lyrics @mastermindbaby @freyathehuntress @angelluv16 @nichmeddar @mxm47max @justaf1girl @a-beaverhausen @tallrock35 @elizamoe133 @imlonelydontsendhelp @jessica3478 @il0vereadingstuff @msimpala-67

[nakylvr]

— ALL THE THINGS I NEVER SAID

sophia laforteza x fem!reader

summary જ⁀➴ you've had a crush on sophia for a while now. on the week before valentine's day you write a letter confessing your love to her, but hide it away. until one of your friends finds it and gives it to her on valentine's day without you knowing.

warnings/tags જ⁀➴ fluff, college!au, mild language

wc જ⁀➴ 2,4 k

you were a person with a lot of thoughts. a lot of words left unsaid because they weren't important or you didn't have the confidence to say it out loud. you were quiet, you didn't have a big group of friends, but you had the ones that counted. you weren't exactly seen in classes unless you answered a question and then the moment would pass and you would be forgotten again. but, you didn't mind it a whole lot.

valentines day was one of the most obnoxious days in the year. at school, at least. you thought once high school was over that it would tone down but no, it got worse if anything. you’d have to sit through multiple classes of boyfriends coming in and asking their girlfriends out on dates, you’d have to deal with girls giggling about what their boyfriends did for them for the holiday, shit, you even had to sit through your roommate being serenaded by her girlfriend first thing this morning. you weren't big on the holiday. what was the point if you didn't have someone to celebrate it with?

and as much as you would hate to admit it, you hated missing out.

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

you didn’t have crushes on a lot of people. a few here and there throughout the years, but none of them went farther than admiring from afar. you never confessed, too afraid of it backfiring and ending in a mess. and it was the same this year.

sophia laforteza, aka the girl so far out of your league that you would rather die than admit your feelings for the girl. you had spoken to her a few times with you being in technical theatre and her being the star of all the musicals and plays alike, and you ended up falling for her. her warm smile, her sweet voice, her beautiful eyes. it was hard not to. especially once you saw just how many people were pining for her.

you walked into the theatre with your binder in your arms filled with all the things you needed to get finished before rehearsal for “romeo and juliet”. could you guess who juliet was? pretty easy. but it still surprised you when you saw sophia sitting on the edge of the stage looking at papers in her hands as the door shut loudly behind you.

sophia’s head perks up upon hearing the door close, and a smile grows on her face at the sight of you. “sorry, i didn't think anyone would be coming in this period,” she says apologetically.

you could feel your heart skip a beat just at the sight of her smile towards you, feeling your anxiety creeping up the closer you approached the stage clutching the binder in your hands like a lifeline. “oh, it's okay!” you assure quickly, shaking your head. “i’m usually in here during free periods when a show is coming up. there's a lot to get situated.”

“i’m sure.” sophia nods, setting the papers down next to her and crossing her leg over the other. “you do a lot of work in tech, don't you?” she asks, tilting her head to the side.

“uh, well, i guess you could say that,” you respond shyly with a short nod. this was the longest you've held a conversation with sophia without one of you being dragged off, and you didn't know what to do. “but, i mean, you do a lot too. i’m sure memorizing all the lines and stuff is hard.”

sophia just shrugs her shoulders lightly. “i guess, but it's nothing technical, literally, like you do. i may be the one on stage, but you're the one who lights me up.” she smiles at you, not a hint of hesitation in her voice as she talks.

“well when you put it that way…” you mumble, glancing down at the ground. your face is heating up the longer you feel her gaze on you, your heart practically beating out of your chest. when you finally meet her eyes again, you quickly look away again. “i uh i need to get some things done before rehearsal today so uhm, yeah,” you manage to say. “you can stay though! or do whatever it was you were doing! i don't mind!” you quickly add, not wanting her to think you were kicking her out.

the giggle that comes from sophia makes your face turn redder than it already was as she smiles at you. “if you don't mind me talking to myself repeating the same lines over and over again, i’ll stay.”

“i don't.” you shake your head, shifting your weight from one foot to the other.

a moment of silence fills the large theatre before you clear your throat and make your way to behind the stage, scurrying off like a scared cat having a showdown with another. once you were behind the stage and sophia was out of your line of sight, you let out a sigh of relief as you set your binder down on the table with a thud. running a hand through your hair, you started to get things ready.

you heard a few people talking about thirty minutes into you doing your work, leaving you confused as you overheard a few things. but, you tried not to think of it too much. that was, until a ginger-haired girl crashed into the back room, literally.

“megan! jesus christ!”

you stare at the scene in front of you, wires in your hands that you were trying to set up for the lighting as sophia rushes in after the ginger.

“holy crap! there's all this shit back here?”

“megan!” sophia grabs megan by her arm, yanking her up off the ground before her eyes land on you. “i’m sorry! my friends wanted to help with my lines. i told them not to come back here.” she shoots a look at megan who puts her palms together.

“i’m sorry! please don't kill me, pretty theatre tech lady!” megan apologizes immediately.

“what?” you let out in surprise, your face turning red.

“it's her words, not mine!” megan continues.

“and we're leaving!” sophia smiles, but her eyes are wide with an emotion you couldn't recognize as she then drags megan back out onto the stage.

what the fuck was that. you stand there frozen for a few minutes trying to process what just happened, hearing the faint voices assumingly yelling from you being able to distinguish a few of the voices. shaking your head, you quickly finish what you were doing before going to your bag.

searching through your bag, your eyes widen when you realize something is missing.

every time you had a crush, you wrote a letter. it was the easiest way to express everything you were feeling rather than mess it up by not knowing what to say at the moment. you poured your heart out into every one you wrote, and it was only a few.

so when the letter you had in your bag is now gone, you obviously were going to freak out.

“shit, shit, shit,” you curse, pulling items out of your bag to see if it was at the bottom or in another part of it only to find it nowhere. “oh my god…” you mumble quietly.

and then, you remembered something. your best friend, danielle, had asked to look in your bag for a spare piece of paper, and you were too busy doing something else that you didn't even notice she never took paper. she probably took the letter.

grabbing your phone you call her, waiting a minute until she picks up.

“yn? what's up?”

“did you take the fucking letter?” you angrily ask quietly.

“what letter?”

“don't even right now!” you try to keep yourself from yelling, knowing that sophia and her friends were still out there. “did you take it?”

“maybe. you needed a push! i’m that push! i’ll give it to her after rehearsal. i know you signed it so it won't be weird.”

“oh my god, danielle, what the fuck?” you sigh dramatically. “this is insane!”

“no, it's me being an amazing friend and getting you a girlfriend!”

“it's not going to work! it never does!” you say, your voice getting louder without noticing.

“because you don't try! trust me, this will work.”

you didn't even respond, just hanging up instead and setting your phone down. letting out a loud sigh, you put your face in your hands.

“i’m doomed.”

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

rehearsal went well. or, you assumed it did, seeing as no one texted you saying things were going wrong. you couldn't even show up. not when you knew danielle would give sophia your note at the end of the day.

you sat at the bleachers of the field, looking at your phone with your headphones on, not paying attention to anything else around you. you tried to keep your mind off what was probably going to go down tomorrow. word will probably go around, you’ll end up rejected, and you’ll move schools as a result. you knew it was a dumb idea to write the letter in the first place, but to be fair, you were never going to give it to her! it just had to be danielle to take matters into her own hands. for your sake. little did you know just what had happened after the rehearsal, or how the day would finish.

feeling a light tap on your shoulder, you jump, turning your head and sliding your headphones off to see sophia standing there, making your heart drop to your stomach.

“oh, h-hey!” you mentally curse at yourself for stuttering right off the bat.

“you weren't at rehearsal today,” sophia says, sitting down next to you.

“yeah, i got caught up in some stuff,” you lie, looking away from her.

“not because of the letter?” she asks.

your heart is beating so fast you think you're going to pass out in a minute or the next at her question. you don't even know if you're breathing at this point. you can't even think of how to respond.

sophia hesitantly reaches her hand towards yours, gently grabbing ahold of it, causing you to slowly look at her and see the small smile on her face.

“you didn't want danielle to give it to me, did you?”

“no,” you whisper, shaking your head. “i-i didn't want you to have it anyway.”

“why?” her expression turns confused, eyebrows furrowed together.

“because i knew you wouldn't like me too,” you mumble quietly.

“you thought i don't?” sophia asks you, her eyes softening once realizing you were serious.

“i mean, yeah.” your voice gets quieter. “i thought you didn't even know i existed until this play.”

sophia hums and nods her head. “i guess i was pretty bad about it at first. but i saw how much work you put into phantom that i kept trying to get a part even if i didn't really want it. i just wanted to see you, even if i was just awkwardly staring from afar and messing up my lines multiple times,” she admits, letting out a short laugh. “i read your letter, and i thought it was really sweet. you have a way with words, y’know. and i’m glad danielle gave it to me, because it made this whole thing a lot easier. i really like you, yn.”

“what?” you accidentally say. to say you're shocked would be an understatement, because you weren't even believing the words that left sophia’s mouth. “are you serious?” you question.

“yeah,” she answers with a nod.

there's a short silence then, as you try to come up with what to say. you couldn't find any words. thankfully for you, sophia speaks up.

“can i kiss you?”

your eyes widen subtly in surprise, and you ultimately nod your head, not trusting your voice. sophia’s other hand cups your jaw as she slowly leans in before softly pressing her lips against yours. the kiss is slow, almost hesitant with both of you not wanting to push it too much, and when she pulls back, her smile is wide and she giggles at the dazed expression on your face.

“you're so cute,” she says fondly, her thumb wiping off a bit of the lip gloss that transferred from her lips to yours. “are you doing anything tonight?”

“no.” you shake your head.

“then be ready by six, and wear something nice,” she tells you, her smile widening. “i’ll be waiting outside your dorm.”

“how do you know where my dorm is?” you ask, looking at her confused.

“your roommate kazuha is my friend daniela’s girlfriend. i was told how irritated you looked when she and megan showed up this morning," sophia answers.

“oh my god.” you shake your head. “okay well, i’ll make sure to be ready.” you smile at her.

“good, cause i don't want to be waiting outside in the hallway all night.” sophia stands up, still holding onto your hand. “you don't mind if i keep the letter, do you?”

“huh?” you look up at her. “uh, no. why would you want to keep it, though?” you ask.

“like i said, it was really sweet. i want to remember it,” she answers like it was nothing. “promise you’ll meet me at six?”

“yeah, i promise.” you nod, trying to ignore her answer to your question. “as long as you don't kidnap me.”

“you think that low of me?” sophia gasps dramatically, acting hurt. “all i’m doing is taking you to a nice dinner, nothing more! unless you want to–”

“okay!” you cut her off, laughing. “i’ll be ready, i swear.”

“you better.” sophia leans down, kissing your cheek. “i’m really glad today turned out this way.”

“me too,” you respond quietly.

“i’ll see you later, pretty.” sophia smiles, pecking your lips before walking away.

watching her walk away, you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding, missing the warmth from her lips on yours and her hand holding yours. your phone buzzes in your pocket, and when you take it out you shake your head. “loser,” you mumble under your breath reading what danielle sent you.

you hated to admit it, but you were happy with how things went today, even if it wasn't how you originally planned it to be. it went better than you expected, and you were thankful for that. even if it was because your best friend stole your letter and gave it out. but you would never say that out loud.