#but i don't attack ppl who just aren't voting in that way. ok?

[britneyshakespeare]

Had the extremely upsetting experience of a mutual of like 6 years going off on me for occasionally making posts about supporting Harris because apparently that makes me a g n cide denier who refuses to learn and grow, with all of my views just being assumed not even from what I've told them I believe or what I've posted before, but just because I DON'T post particularly the kind of things they THINK I should be. When I pointed out how much they were just completely assuming about stuff I'd never talked to them about, I was told it doesn't matter what I do in real life or "care" about if I simply disagree with their conclusion and vote for her anyway. Like they were absolutely not sorry for the level of maliciousness they not just assumed of my character, but for some reason thought appropriate to bring directly to me before unfollowing me. No apology whatsoever for how discomforting or upsetting that might be and certainly no acknowledgment that I could disagree with them and still be a good person. I just got another even longer rant about how they fundamentally can't fuck with me because of this one thing, no matter WHAT else I do in my real life (which I pointed out that they do not know), and how I'm directly supporting fascism.

Like seriously what is it about Tumblr that makes people think they know someone based off of occasional posts? There were just such DEEP assumptions they were making of me and going off of very little or absolutely nothing. Around the time I first became mutuals with that person I used to express my personality and beliefs and talk about what was going on in my life a lot more openly, but I've significantly scaled back on doing that in many ways for many reasons. One of my major ones is privacy and the way I've had strangers outside my followers and following circles just find random things I say and dogpile me for it. I was fundamentally changed after some T Fs did that to me like 3 years ago. I also just didn't have many conversations w that person anymore (I message people in general on here like 10x less than I did circa 2018-2019, which I'm somewhat sorry about!). My point is to say I think this person felt comfortable assuming that they knew me, especially who I am in 2024 at the age of 25, much better than they actually did.

One of the specific things they accused me of was being afraid of learning and growing (because I don't perform social media activism on here like they think I should). Like AFRAID to take criticism. When again I've never received criticism from them or had to respond to any criticism on here before as pertaining to my views on... well, absolutely any of the issues they accused me of not caring about. They essentially treated it as if the only thing in the world I cared about was the US election and characterized me as the most out-of-touch liberal they could possibly imagine, because I'm not "pushing" Kamala Harris to be better (Oh?? Should I do that on here?? Does she read my blog??).

And most hypocritically what they said was that I only *sometimes* *vaguely* post pro-Harris things (I often post like 5 or fewer things in a day though?). But here's the kicker. "Because I know I'll get shit for it. And rightfully so."

Really????? Not a single person, anon or not, in my messages or in a tagged post or anything, has ever given me shit before for saying who I'm voting for. I'm actually NOT afraid of "getting shit" for that opinion, I just don't start fights with people who are anti-voting. And why should I??? I genuinely don't believe in trying to change the minds of strangers on the internet about that sort of thing. I'm just not confrontational about it; that is so not the same thing as being "afraid of getting shit." I'm not posting ENOUGH about my support for Harris, therefore I'm afraid. But therefore they can also make all these assumptions about me being their strawman for an ignorant Harris supporter.

I'm afraid of getting shit but I still post anyway? But if I weren't afraid of getting shit I'd be posting a lot more?? This is ALL based on their assumptions of what my blog *should* look like, based on what I really and truly believe. My level of posting every now and then is an accurate gauge of my feelings on complex, sensitive, global issues. Because I'm voting for the Democratic presidential candidate and I'm ok sharing pretty much just that little glimpse of myself.

I really don't think that person knows just how inappropriate and insulting that is to just say all of that to me. Like they really know what's going on in my head. Their first message began and ended with like "I'm sorry I love you I just can't take it anymore" but they clearly weren't sorry enough to try and be more respectful to me, and they didn't love me enough not to default to extremely ungenerous assumptions and attacking me based off of those instead of any actual words I've said that they take issue with.

Online radicalization is real and it's not necessarily bad because your political views can start to fall well out of the contemporary Overton window. The way you find it appropriate to treat people whose views, however common, seem to fundamentally misalign with yours... that does matter. You can't just assume the worst of everyone and then act on that in how you approach them as individuals. And then be shocked that you don't stay friends with them. You can't be confrontational with someone about an issue you've never had an honest conversation about, and then expect them to take your bad faith in them as reasonable well-meaning criticism.

I'm afraid of criticism??? I'm afraid of criticism. No I'm not. This person and I have never had an issue before where they criticized me and I got harshly defensive. It was ALL projection. The entire tone of their messages was as if all their anti-voting posts recently were somehow in communication with the occasional go-vote-for-Harris posts that I make. That's not a conversation. I don't post for your satisfaction. I don't post in "response" to my mutuals I disagree with. I just post what's on my mind, sometimes, about some things. I really again can't stress enough how baffled I am by this

[halfdeadwallfly]

🌻

heyy!!!!!!! Ok so I promised acappella (did i? .... eh) so! I'm basically gonna take this as my chance to rant about my group and my friends <3333 (if this does end up being too annoying, genuinely i'm sorry, i just get excited abt it too much and i like talking abt it l o l )

ok so BASICALLY i am in this acappella group at my school, and we have 13 different ones so some of them have different themes so my group does music from movies, tv series, video games, and musicals [AND!!!!!!! something i recently proposed----- podcasts hehehehehhee bc i have sooooooooo many podcast song suggestions for our rep] anyway there's like 18 of us and it's really fun and everyone is just so lovely and kind. (i promise i'm not gonna talk abt everybody, just the ppl i'm like closest with)

the person who's probably the closest friend i've made so far in college is also an alto, and i love her so much, she's so wonderful. she's sort of boisterous and really caring and a very good actor. she's super nice just to chill with, and at the same time it's always so much fun talking to her. once at rehearsal during an audition i was having a tic attack and she noticed what was going on and said that she could help me out if i needed it, which was so weird but nice bc most of the time when i'm having tics, ppl aren't mean exactly but they definitely don't really know what's going on. she also has an AMAZING singing voice, and she did a killer solo on I'm Still Standing our first semester there. she's just so beautiful and the kind of person that you feel comfortable around just by the way she is

when i was running for music director, there was another freshman that was running for the job as well, which was stressful but also-- really so cool, bc she's so smart and talented and experienced, and so vibrant like just as a person too. she also has a killer singing voice (ofccccc) and the most expressive, commanding performance energy. when the rest of the group was discussing who they wanted to vote for (our group in particular amongst the thirteen is infamous for discussions) we were both super nervous!! and hanging out in the hallway talking about our goals for the group, and we both have so many of the same ideas about stuff like vowels and dynamics and like general technique, it's just been so exhilerating to get to talk to her and know her! i really hope that in the next election she runs again so we can work together officially!!! she's also an artist and her art is so good :DDD

ok last person i'm gonna go in detail abt---- my co-md, who i actually did not really like when i joined the group. just sort of like did not vibe with him initially, but getting to spend more time with him i actually really do enjoy talking to him and hanging around, esp now that we're working together! it's been a stressful semester acappella-wise due to a sudden and weird resignation from our former long term md, but me and him preparing to take over now that our remaining md graduated, it's honestly just been so fun. he's so smart at music theory, and i feel like our different strengths just work really well together when we're leading. one of the things i was most stressed abt in becoming md was having to take charge, esp as an underclassman leading upperclassmen, but he's been so open to all my thoughts and suggestions, and whenever i'm feeling anxious abt getting people's attention or being too pushy, he makes sure everyone is on the same page, which i think is really nice. we had group karaoke once and we sang teenagers by mcr together lol

anyway so now i'm going into my first official semester as co-md with a killer new rep selection, with one song that i'm co arranging which is so exciting!!!!! i just really love everyone i've met in acappella and every bit of music we've put together.

[gncrevan]

i think sometimes decisions are just about making your life a little more convenient or enjoyable and that's also part of surviving somehow. when you already live with a lot of deprivation, certain luxuries like ordering food or having access to media can mean a lot. sometimes these decisions aren't political; while acute boycott in support of strikes are very meaningful political actions, i think the idea of voting with your wallet is essentially neoliberal. if that's the only political action you do, then yes, harm reduction through boycott is better than nothing. but i think there are much more meaningful ways of activism and organizing you can do, that have a much greater impact.

the private is political, but it's also still private. you still have to make certain decisions by prioritizing yourself. like not being vegan bc of dietary restrictions, ordering food bc of lack of energy, ordering things you need through amazon bc of time restraints or it being the cheapest and you being poor, relying on a lot of single use plastic bc of disabilities, and paying streaming services or game subscriptions or audible or kindle or comixology to access media bc we need enrichments and sometimes those are the most viable options to us given what is available where we live and what is accessible to our disabilities.

i don't like these conversations where ppl say stuff like "it's ok bc there's no ethical consumption under capitalism anyways" or "it's ableist to tell me not to use amazon". no, both of these things are incorrect and betray an inability to understand these concepts and delineate between individualist and systemic analysis. by using these terminologies to excuse your behavior and attack those who criticize it, both you and them are focusing on an individualist perspective, but these are systemic issues. systemically, you should be outraged that you cannot escape the clutches of big brand conglomerates and that you have to rely on ordering from amazon. the system is set up in a way that keeps you tied to all these horrible corporate practices. living completely independently from the system is a utopia bc even if you somehow had, say, your own farmstead and lived entirely off the land, without anything you buy from the outside, land ownership still relies on capitalism. that's what capitalism does.

so the individualist approach to a solution is to try and boycott, and eventually fail at some point bc there will be stuff you need and that also relies on exploitation and destruction, be that your phone, be that food. again, yes, short-term boycott can be important, and also yes, long-term boycott can be successful in taking down one specific enemy. but the system stays the same. you still partake in the exploitation of workers and resources and the destruction of the planet, by virtue of being alive. that's what "no ethical consumption" means. that's why the target should be the system, and why we can't meaningfully do politics via personal responsibility. nobody wants to live in deprivation, and it's not feasible to do for a long time without losing significant amounts of health, both mental and physical, and thereby energy to organize. cause that's what we should do instead.

if you want working conditions to change, the best thing you can do is join or support a union. if you want political direction to change, the best thing you can do is join or form or support an activist group. and to be able to do that, it's important you prioritize your own well-being over perceived political purity. it's not helpful to justify that through the individualist lens, instead discard the framework altogether. do politics through action, not consumption.