#but i didnt want to use actual colours for it cuz it wouldnt match the other two pieces in the post

[anxiouslyextroverted]

stuff like this srsly confuses me cuz I don't understnad how masc means boy/man, but masculine women also exist like I thought masculine was a gender expression, same with feminine,and it didnt actually mean gender identity itself?

and its hard to pinpoint my exact personality and gender expression because like my style is just black hoodies i pick off my floor which im used to doing that for years. and my personality is like everywhere like my likes and dislikes are ig stereotypically fem and masc (cuz i dont actually seperate anything by gender or gender expression , im not raised really being taught the difference.) and stereotypically ig im masculine cuz i dont wear makeup but i dont get that cuz men wear makeup too so how is not wearing makeup masculine to other people. And then i might be considered feminine too cuz I love pink but like I see pink as a very masculine colour in my head. This is why im gonna fail my character design course becasue I dont see colours ike gendered, or like see dark colours as scary for instance, and i dont see clothes as having any meaning other than pieces of fabric. Istg one day il understand style and what the difference is with genders but ig not yet... Like did no one else as a kid see gender as identical, and believe women and men were equally dominant and that women can dom in sx and sht and can mmake nsfw jokes like men and mmen can wear dresses because as a kid i was surrounded by men that wore dresses and stuff like that so its just so normalized to me that I now am struggling to understnad why its a big deal for most and what is so gendered about it. I dont know if im making sense but imagine someone grows up in a society where everyone believed everythng feminine or masculine was just the same meaning and then that person was put on a planet where everyone separates it, because thats hwo i feel right now. And i think masc and feminine should be more nuance then just style. Because soetimmes peoples style and personality dont match, why do I wear black all the time and dark colours? because I just want too. Why do I wear pink, because I just picked it up off my floor. There is no personality or gender behind why I picked those clothes, I dnt even know what clothes would be considered feminine.

the rare times I wore a dress, I was fine with it until people started condescending me and treating me weakly. If I get treated weakly while presenting stereotypically femininely than I guess I don't want to dress stereotypically femininely? But if that idea was gone, I wouldnt mind it. I dont usually present stereotypically femininely i even though im shy and sensitive and that would categorize as feminine to people ig, but whenever i do it, It feels like im doing something im not used to at all cuz i never really had that like stage, ive been the same since a kid and never changed cuz if i change then im going against what im used to, my routine and my mum and rest of my family is gonna make it this massive af deal like I sort of tried fashion by going to thrift stores and getting cheap clothes not just fo cosplay and my brother was like "WOAH. You look so fashionable" and i freaked out cuz hes not used to me being fashionable and i just wanna go back to not doing that yk, attnention is stressful

[fujotakuuu]

❤️

@kakashibingo prompts: physical affection, home & late night

im gonna be too busy to complete my bingo card by the end of the posting period (july 31) so this is probably it, but i did way more than i thought i would and all of it was so fun! thanks to the mods for setting this up :))) if you're curious, my bingo card's under the cut!

[jakeperalta]

Okay so it wasnt announced today..but maybe cuz she didnt want to release something the same day as Olivia Rodrigo? I kinda wonder why she hinted at today though in the Colbert interview. She did release a Fearless chapter but everything was pointing to 1989. I guess it gives us a little more time to imagine or brainstorm the cover. I agree with you..I would want something simple but bright colors instead to match the feel of the album. I know the original didnt really have bright colors though so I dont know what it could be. I agree that she'd keep the same style..half her face. I think a city skyline background could be cool but maybe unrealistic. I wonder what her hair or outfit would be..i know she basically just wears a tshirt anyway so would it just be a similar shirt..or saying I love NY lol. I like your ideas..i hadn't considered her taking the picture..and I think she will come up with something cool and creative that would match each album rather than just a filter. My guess for the announcement is after next week cuz Olivia's album coming out, but also I've seen people saying if 1989 could come out at the end of June which would only be a month but Fearless was a two month wait..so in July? Or it could be a shorter wait but I also saw people thinking it was gonna be announced June 4th. I dont mind cuz my sister and I are getting ready for the new Twenty One Pilots album next week which will keep us busy until then but I thought she just might announce it for today cuz she hinted at this date. I also kinda just wanted June cuz my bday is in a month, and I just wanna know the date, cover, vault songs lol but dont really mind waiting as much for the actual album compared to other people are upset about not getting anything yet. I wouldnt want it to be too long though.

yeah i was definitely expecting/hoping for more than a fearless chapter today! you could be right though, like she was going to move the evermore release so she didn’t clash with paul mccartney’s album release, i think she definitely does take into account other artists’ release schedules. weirdly i feel like the original 1989 cover colour palette doesn’t really match the album that much, i think bright colours would definitely work well for it and something incorporating new york would be cool because that’s such a big motif from the era. i agree i don’t really mind waiting for the album itself, especially since we already know the songs lol, but i’m so curious about the cover and vault songs!

[acidmatze]

I said “I wont elaborate” under my Gojou is autistic blurb earlier but that was because it was 3am and now its not and im more or less conscious (Awake would be an overstatement) and my need to overshare is as big as my brain telling me not to because my words dont make any sense anyyway (Unstoppable force VS unmoveable object)

This isnt meta or an analysis its just me screaming excitedly into the void while i wait for my headphones to charge so i can leave the house (music blocks out noises)

So why would I say he is autistic in the first place? Because I can. “Oh but he doesnt seem autistic hes so open and extroverted and talkative” Bruh, if i would have to list all extroverted, talkative, open autistic people i know we would still be sitting here tomorrow. Autistic = introverted, quiet and shy is a false equivalency and we should bury it. Anyway, I wouldnt have thought of him as autistic too until i read how everyone else around him (sometimes including the reader) reacts to him. How they describe him and I realised that this didnt match up at all with what I was perceiving. And then i realised that people used to perceive me exactly the same way as they perceive Gojou now. The reason they now view me differently is 1. I avoid people out of fear 2. I did years of therapy and introspection and think i have the worst mistakes under control now. NTs are really picky with what behaviours they accept and when and seriously i still dont know what their deal is, just chill out. I am still consciously choosing different dialogue options than i normally would but those would piss people off for reasons i can only vaguely understand. Gojou meanwhile doesnt limit himself like that, he does what many of us really want and just says whatever. Hes still respected cuz hes the strongest sorcerer while when i would say whatever i naturally would people would beat the shit out of me. (Catch me throwing hands with Barbara in the soup aisle because i let her know that her coat is hideous. After all, if people are allowed to openly and loudly tell me that the way i look is weird then i should be allowed to tell people that their fashion sense sucks. At least their choice is deliberate while i can do very little about my face)

Okay back on track. Gojou actually sucks at communicating. But he has enough self-esteem to not care. If they dont get him they dont get him and those who will, will. People would perceive him differently if he wouldnt suck. He sucks at communcating empathy He sucks at communicating his thoughts and intentions He sucks at communicating his emotions He only sucks at this in the eyes of many neurotypicals, mind you. My autistic bff and me understood him plenty. (Pls dont ask me what he Actually means cuz i just cannot put it into words. If i could i would have more friends cuz i wouldnt suck at communicating too) Somehow his use of metaphors stroke some people as odd which stroke me as odd cuz many people do that to help others or themselves understand complex issues better. But apparently when he does it its wrong? Maybe because you need to know the source of the metaphor? I dunno. Probably. I think if he opens his mouth to say something you only get roughly 50-60% of the actual message. The emotions, true intentions and everything else is left behind cuz shits hard to communicate, especially when your mind has a million thoughts at once and everything is happening so much. Its something you just learn to live with eventually. Some start overexplaining, some dont realise that the other party doesnt get the entire message and some dont care. I mostly overexplain, Gojou doesnt care. Its like youre getting only raw data and data isnt the most emotional stuff ever, right? (Unless youre a nerd like me and get Very Emotional over raw space data because SPACE IS BEAUTIFUL, MAN) I forgot what else i wanted to say because

Unlimited Void just reads like a sensory overload. Someone should trap me in there and I would probably say it feels like a regular Tuesday. The entire eye thing reads like either constant sensory overload or having shitty eyesight or both. (As someone who has both..... both) I have to block out sounds and Gojou has to block out sight, understandable. Sight is the sense we take in the most with so i can imagine that gets overloaded the fastest, especially when you see more than regular people do. (Sometimes it DOES feel like we see more than everyone else. Maybe we do? Who knows) Like yesterday i went absolutely ballistic in the supermarket cuz they changed their entire layout and colour scheme and its already a big and noisy and overwhelming store to begin with and the new layout made everything even worse. New things sucks. They make me anxious. Unless i want them. Years before i was only able to enter a store with music on and blocking out every other noise and dont even attempt to talk to me Im focussing on not loosing my shit over all the other senses being overloaded. Now i learned to suppress the shutdown until im back home so i can loose my shit there. Have you ever seen everything at once? Heard everything at once? If youre NT you maybe say yes but i would say nah you havent. If you would you would loose your shit, you wouldnt even know what to do anymore, you would probably either lie down on the floor screaming or shut down completely and not do anything, because just breathing is now taking all energy. There is nothing because there is everything. Yeah sounds like Unlimited Void to me, if you ask me.

I forgot every other reason i had because what is Taking Notes So You Can Remember Later, theres only one impulse after another cuz ADHD. (They too see and hear and notice everything at once) This is a jumbled mess, have fun