#but i did watch the first ep with my bro through Free Trial

[todayisafridaynight]

Snap: Omg my DB blog had been gone for years guys get over it!!!

*Daima Exists*

Snap: Okay you know when I said…

they gave my boy yamcha a modicum of melanin back and he's a teeny lil cutie of COURSE im gonna talk about tb oh my GODDDDD

[dotthings]

Let’s talk about why Dean dancing with a lamp is subtext, but it’s subtext that supports textual arcs. Dean dancing with a lamp is not random. Meta on why Dean dancing with a lamp is part of the build of a textual arc for Dean, thematically, which also connects to his relationship with Cas. This symbolic moment being tacitly about Destiel will only feel like reaching if you ignore context, ignore canon, ignore long arcing, ignore textual material surrounding it. This isn’t just me talking about a ship, this is an important arc for Dean himself emotionally and the way canon’s working, Cas has become the star player in this specific emotional Dean arc about yearning. 

Here are some canon quotes. I could just leave these here and not write another word of meta because the canon wrote it for me. But I’ve added some further commentary to spell out clearly what I’m getting at.

Dean in 8.14 “Trial and Error” by Andrew Dabb:

“You see a light at the end of this ugly-ass tunnel. I don't. But I tell you what I do know – it's that I'm gonna die with a gun in my hand. 'Cause that's what I have waiting for me – that's all I have waiting for me. I want you to get out. I want you to have a life – become a man of Letters, whatever. You, with a wife and kids and – and – and grandkids, living till you're fat and bald and chugging Viagra – that is my perfect ending, and it's the only one that I'm gonna get.”

Dean in 10.16 “Paint it Black” by Eugenie Ross-Lemming and Brad Buckner:

“You know, the life I live, the work I do…I pretty much just figured that that was all there was to me, you know? Tear around and jam the key in the ignition and haul ass until I ran out of gas. I guess I just thought sooner or later, I’d go out the same way that I live – pedal to the metal, and that would be it....Now, um… recent events, uh… make me think I might be closer to that than I really thought. And…I don’t know. I mean, you know, there’s – there’s things, there’s…people, feelings that I-I-I want to experience differently than I have before, or maybe even for the first time.”

Sam and Dean in 11.04 “Baby” by Robbie Thompson:

SAM: Really? You don't . . . Ever want something more? DEAN: I'm sorry, have you met us? We're batting a whopping zero in domestic life, man. Goose eggs. SAM: You don't ever think about something? Not marriage or whatever. But . . . Something? You know, with a hunter? Somebody who understands the life?

Sam and Dean in 13.23 “Let the Good Times Roll” by Andrew Dabb:

DEAN: But on a beach somewhere, you know? Can you imagine? You, me, Cas, toes in the sand, couple of them little umbrella drinks. Matching Hawaiian shirts, obviously. Some hula girls. SAM: You talking about retiring? You? DEAN: If I knew the world was safe? Hell, yeah. And you know why? 'Cause we freaking earned it, man.

Sam and Dean in 15.08 “Our Father, Who Aren’t in Heaven” by Eugenie Ross-Lemming and Brad Buckner:

DEAN: Look, man, I didn't want to say anything, okay, 'cause I was kind of in in a bad place, and, uh, yeah, I didn't want to jinx it or whatever, but, you know, I tried the family thing, right? SAM: Yeah, me too. And that's not for us. DEAN: No, not really. But I'm just saying if it was to work, Eileen, you know, she gets it. She gets us. She gets the life. She's hot. SAM: Dean. I mean, I'm not even- DEAN: Look, all I'm saying is you- you could do worse, okay? And she could certainly do better. Like, so much better. I'm happy for you, Sammy.

Dean and Garth in 15.10 “The  Heroes’ Journey” written by Andrew Dabb:

DEAN: You know, I gotta say, aside from pincushion in there… this is pretty nice. GARTH: Yeah, better than I ever thought I'd get. I mean, hunting -- I figured I'd be dead before I'm 40. You know, go out young and pretty. But now I've got a great wife, great kids. I guess...sometimes things work out.

Dean in 15.10 “The Heroes’ Journey” by Andrew Dabb:

Dean, wistful, watching through the window as Garth and Bess dance: You know, I always thought I could be a good dancer if I wanted to be.

Ok, let those roll around in your brain for moment. 

Now: CONTEXT. CONTEXT. CONTEXT.

There’s this long running arc about maybe Sam and Dean could each find a significant other, not white picket fence, but...something, with someone already in the life, who gets their life. There’s Dean’s move from despairing and believing the only ending he could have, the only ending any hunter could have, is dying with a gun in hand, to Dean’s enthusiasm for the concept of retirement, Dean’s wistfulness about finding a significant other, for what he thinks he can’t have, and he starts the cycle all over again, if he can’t have it, then he wants Sam to have it, so Dean encourages Sam with Eileen. Saileen, the Dean-blessed, Dean-approved Sam ship. Dean ships it. And that is how the canon is trending, complete with Sam and Eileen kissing goodbye and saying “this is real” and even God himself saying their feelings were real, “that was all you,” even if God manipulated events around them. Which is an overt mirror to Dean and Cas and Dean’s expressly stated doubts about what’s real and what isn’t, and Cas telling Dean “we are.” 

Much the way Sam has been witness to Destiel, and has often pointed out Dean’s Cas feelings. Dean’s got a front row seat to Saileen and approves; Sam’s had a front row seat to Destiel and approves. 

Let’s throw in Robert Berens’ work in The Trap here, since that’s relevant to this specific topic as well, because why did Sam and Dean in the potential future timeline where they’d killed Chuck give up and cave in to their vampire instincts? The world being overwhelmed with monsters...and losing Eileen and losing Cas. It’s right there in the dialogue. I’ll give you the quote and everything:

Sam and Dean in 15.09 “The Trap” by Robert Berens:

SAM: You want to quit? What's happened to you, Dean? Ever since -- DEAN: Ever since what? We lost pretty much everyone we've ever cared about? Ever since the Mark made Cas go crazy? Ever since I had to bury him in a Ma'lak box? Ever since then? Yeah. You know why? 'Cause the monsters -- they're everywhere. Everywhere! What we do -- it's not even Hunting anymore. It's whack-a-mole. We don't even save people. Every friend we've ever had is either dead, or they got wise and they packed it in. SAM: Jody's still fighting, and Bobby -- DEAN: Bobby has a death wish, and you know it. And Jody -- ever since what happened to Donna and the girls, she does, too. And after Eileen... so do you.

“Ever since” Dean had to bury Cas in a Ma’lak box. “After Eileen...so do you.” 

So there’s this canonical long, long thread across multiple authors (and those weren’t even all the quotes, I’m sure people could dig up more) about Dean in particular yearning towards finding a significant other, some contentment, with someone who already is in the hunting life, who gets it, who understands.  

An episode that flat out shows how losing their significant others is the final straw that rips out Sam and Dean’s last will to fight, and they lose themselves, and after they’re turned into vampires, they just...give into the darkness. Where Sam gives up their shot at destroying the big bad because losing everyone they love is too high a cost. Where losing Cas makes Dean lose hope, where losing Eileen sends Sam into a death wish mindset. Sam and Dean don’t just need each other. That’s not canon, it never has been.

And then right after that, along comes meta episode The Heroes’ Journey. Sorry if you don’t like The Heroes’ Journey, but it’s what the canon did, it’s textual, along with everything else I’ve pointed out here, and in among the crackish humor are some real emotional narrative points. 

In The Heroes’ Journey, Dean gets to see Garth’s life. Garth found his significant other, Bess, and she’s another werewolf. Now, Garth’s life resembles the traditional white picket fence idea a lot more than what Team Free Will are headed for. Garth has a big house with a porch, and he’s a dentist. He’s also a werewolf and his wife is a werewolf and his kids are werewolves because Bess is a pureblood werewolf, Garth didn’t exactly leave the life, and he helps Sam and Dean on a case. But nothing’s been indicating to me that anyone in Team Free Will is headed for that kind of settling down, with a house, becoming a dentist. However, the canon has been practically shouting now, as we near final episodes of SPN, to make the point about a desirable outcome--some kind of stability, contentment, and a significant other. Dean gets a front row seat to seeing a hunter can have that. Garth’s a hunter who turned into a werewolf and he can have that. 

When EP’s talk about how they aren’t headed for a white picket fence or driving off into the sunset or settling down, none of that rules out them finding...something...with someone, and some form of stability and contentment.  Nope, I can’t really imagine them in the suburbs becoming dentists. But canon sure is putting up big neon arrows to...something. Think outside the box. This isn’t about the white picket fence. 

And in The Heroes’ Journey, Dean, conked out on the good gas so Garth can fix his teeth, has a trippy dream where he dances with a lamp.

Rewatch the ep. Look at how the dance is choreographed not just the use of light, because that’s a clue too. The whole dance could have been Dean and Garth being dancing bros, but Garth fades off the stage, and Dean dances alone...until he grabs the standing lamp. In a season where Dean and Cas’s relationship is an A-plot, define it how you like, it’s A-plot. Their breakup and their reconciliation, which played like a marital breakup and reconciliation, are tied to major mytharc beats. In a season where a long-running textual theme about Dean’s developing hope for retirement and his wistfulness about “things...people...feelings...” is getting further play. Where Dean and Cas’s relationship continues to be one of the show’s most central ones.

Dean dances with a lamp. While his emotionally fraught, intense close relationship with Cas--A BEING MADE OF LIGHT--has a long-running arc and recently more and more textual level content spelling out the sublimated romantic interest in small words, while there’s an arc about Dean’s yearning for that stability, contentment, a significant other.

CONTEXT. 

We don’t think Destiel’s “going canon” because Dean dances with a lamp, it’s that Dean dancing with a lamp is kinda loud serving as reflection of canon textual arcing. Sometimes subtext adds a layer. Sometimes subtext is directly tied to the surface layers, an echo, a highlighter.

I’ll just be over here, crying because Dean danced with a lamp.

[phoneismybf]

TharnType the Series Ep. 8 Review

I'm not ready for this episode yet people are very exited for the torture (?). Lol.

#TharnTypeEp8 #TharnTypeS #TharnTypetheSeries

It is unsual to see TumTar at the beginning but it is good to see them smile like that. Do you see that big smile from Tar when Tum plays the certain melody? Finally he can smile that free. Well suddenly sad again because of the birthday notification. Hurry up both of you need to clear everything.

Watch TharnType the Series Ep. 8 Engsub

Okay Ai Tharn we knew that you like dark chocolate now but don't emphasis it. We knew who has a darker skin. Yes, khun mom want to see him, why you don't say that he is yours. Hahaha. (I think he remembers what Type said about he is not ready yet, yes, okay, gentleman) Now here he is, the P'San Khrap. Seems he really close to this family already. Liau, wait, Tharn isn't that happy receiving the gift from him. What is this, miss the 14 of Tharn, may be he was a cry baby back then but not now P'. Yes, no more cute little boy, he already have a daddy's little boy at the dorm. Oiiii, such a supportive big bro, yes Tharn is more handsome than him and look at Tharn's smile. He probably said "I love you big bro" in silence.

Ai No.... Euuuu he should go with Tharn to his house so Tharn could introduce him to everyone there. SEE...... EVERYONE HEAR THAT, THIS IS THE REASON WHY TYPE WANTED TO TELL NO ONLY BECAUSE HE IS THE ONE WHO WILL SPILL THE TEA. SO TYPE DOSEN'T NEED TO EXPLAIN OR DECLARE ANYTHING. LMAO. KEEP ASKING PEUN.... KEEP ASKING CHAMP, COME ON CORNER BOTH OF THEM. DAMN not this time guys... Let them "kin" each other, I mean kin the grilled meats. Look at No's apologies, how cute he is. Hahaha

Got an Audy bae... Ready to pick you up. Have a car but live in a condo. What else you could think Ai No beside it is more convenient for practice music, of course to let Type scream without anyone knows what they are doing. LOL.

Peun... Don't judge a book by its cover. The one who know the real Tharn is Type only between all of you. Also he is his wify so don't ever think to say anything bad about Tharn.

Techno really digs everything on Type, he is curious now about their relationship. Ai No... You are a good friend but I'm worry you will spill more. See, even he is the one who mention about P'San first to Type. Meung maeng....

Type.... make a wish for Tharn, please. You never make a wish on your birthday or never wish or pray for other for their own goodness? Why he can't understand? Yes, the bed is all yours don't feel ngao/lonely.

Yes, Long always remember his crush's birthday. I want to dig information from him. I'm sure that he likes Tharn. No excuses with those facebook updates. P'San was Tharn first love, O.K. may the war come then.

WHAT THE F*CKKKKKK. WHAT DID TYPE GIVE? WHAT THE, BAD, YOU BAD BOY. YOU ARE NOT DADDY'S LITTLE BOY ANYMORE. HOW MANY TIMES BOTH OF YOU WILL DO IT? MY RATIONAL THINKING HAS STOP WORKING. CUTE BUT NO NO NO... YOU WERE GOOD TO NOT TELLING AI NO ABOUT THE PRESENTS. "hurry up come, I'm already dying to use the presents" Tharn. WHATEVER LA MEUNG....

YES, YOU HAVE ALL THE FLAVORS, WE KNEW YOUR FAVORITE IS C.H.O.C.H.O.L.A.T.E. He is starving for food not for S yet. Hurry up get him one then do the rounds later. Look at that satisfying smile on Type's face. Why I can't resist his cuteness though. Wow he opened the wraped present, not good boy not good, the owner didn't know it yet. Just say it you just got jealous. I smell something after this, what will Tharn do? Ai Tharn what will you do? Don't tell me that you the one who will start a fire between Type and P'San.

SEE.... TECHNO SPILLED IT AGAIN TO HIS FRIENDS, THE QUEENS. OIII AI NOO..... a little bit but (sigh). "I think he wants to keep it secret to" Type. Hell no, we all know the truth. "then why you still upset, shouldn't you be crazy in love with your boyfriend?" Techno. They were intended to be crazy in love but were canceled Ai No. Yes, help them make up so they can make love later. Mmmm... What?

Ow that smile comes from Tharn. I know there is something odd. Not funny Tharn, if you make, what I think, come true. Type really such an honest person, he keeps the emotion on his face while greeting P'San. YOU ARE JEALOUS AI TYPE. P'San's radar is on, get over that hand P, don't let people burn in jealousy. AI TECHNOOO WHY HE IS SUCH A J*RK. YOU SAID YOU WANNA HELP THEM TO MAKE UP. I can see Tharn don't want him to join too. Ai No... Why? Even Tharn is worry now about Type. I really want to punch this PEUN on his face, WHY HE MENTIONED THAT GIRL. SUCH A TRIAL FRIEND. That hand P' yud leui... Stop it... Now you understand right? Ai No... I can see your reaction, I'll punch you if you still act innocent. F*CK OFF BRO YOU GET ON MY NERVE. STOP BEING CURIOUS AND YOU STILL CAN LAUGH LIKE THAT. DONE WITH YOU. BYE... BETRAYAL. SEE..... I know he doesn't like raw food that's why he ordered the grilled one. But he never tells Tharn because he feels uneasy to say it when Type ordered a lot of raw food. But, it will become another problem if both of them don't talk about it. Bad situation, bad friend. Say it that he is your, Type, or silence and talk later with your present doing (coughing).

A mature and a childish. This will happen. Now Tharn take control, he is upset not to Type but P'San, to much spoiler. Yes, he didn't spit it because his boyfriend fed him and now he is a mature one he can eat raw as he likes at least he doesn't have an allergic. If he has an allergic and never tell Type, this will be problematic. So, just forget the past and go on. Hahhhh, this P'San, he never gives up. I think he still hoping for Tharn to be his again. That's why he always come every year to get more chances. That's what will happen Type, if you never tell other who Tharn is, people will keep coming to bother both of you except you are mature enough to not think about it and live what you both should live.

I'm speechless.... Type, you are more complicated than a girl who say "whatever" when she is asked what she want to eat and go for a war later because she doesn't give any clue. Jebb, why my heart hurt, this is not my problem, this is yours. You are tiring even Tharn said that too to his brother. Yes, you never listen, everything he said those are what he likes and what he hates, you are the one who never learn, you are the one who never understand, never ask, never curious about something might he likes or hate the most. What you think is only those c*ndoms. You even don't know that he likes chocolate. Stubborn, childish, stupid, heartless, what else guys? It is hurting me to see Tharn crying again. He always be honest, he knew you really like that restaurant, he ate and didn't spit. Appreciate it bro. Now he said, P'San is more understand him, Think bro think, don't be so emotional, you look like a girl on their period. LOL. He even said he hate "break up" the most. He already tired, give him more happiness. Don't make him like me, I already tired to find one, I even think to live my life alone. So don't ever make him to freeze his heart. A frozen heart will be very hard to melt. Meung maeng.... Assh*le.

Arghhh I hate this rollercoaster. Yes Type yess I forgive you such adorable human being. But Tharn seems thinking about your words na. So, be careful. His heart is weak, he might be through a hardest path before that you would never think. "You won't never suffer as much as I do anyway" Tharn. Jebb mak Ai Tharn. You stabbing my heart, we are the same don't say that.

So that is the real story about P'San and Tharn. Why it reminds me something. Team up with Type, yes, I hate him too. Thorn was took care of Thanya to hospital and he banged Tharn, he has a thick face seriously even Thorn was hit him that much. Of course he was that cute when he was 14 but it wasn't the right way to bang an under age. Poor Tharn, he was innocent that is why he gave P'San in. We talk about the comfort not the rational. Suddenly blow my emotion, it seriously reminds me something that I don't want to recall. F*ck. I can see something in Thorn's eyes, he knew that his friend is good but also dangerous. Thorn knew his goodness and badness, yet Tharn knew only his goodness. Ironic. Why we are so connected Ai Tharn. (take a deep breath). Marked, P'San.

"If a woman ask you to sleep with her, don't you want to do it too?" Tharn. Bro, mind your age! May be I'm an old fashioned but I'm agree with the statement that we can't do these kind of stuff under 17. I mean take a look on the safest age. If something happen, you will lose your teenage time while you can play and hangout with friends as much as you like before you are busy with those time consuming work. Well if you are gay yes that pregnant will never happen yet it concerns to moral lessons. Others may think were born to be a gay or trapped in a wrong gender. In my situation it is not about you were born to be a gay but it is because you were experienced with a guy in that young age. The age where you were build your pesonality who you want to become. And may be Tharn did the same thing to Tar like P'San did to him. Experience lead him to be like P'San but thanks God that he is mature enough to differentiate what is good and what is bad. The comfort lead him to a guy, first thing that will stuck forever in mind, that's why he couldn't do it with a girl. The feeling and the comfort for man and woman are different. Some people easily to change it but for people like Tharn, me and Type, we already had the experience since the younger age, and we can't change it easily. It already stucked in the heart and mind. More complicated if you bring a word 'sin' to here for people who have religion like me, man, frustrating. I had what Tharn had, I did what P'San did and it has been lead me to live a life full of guilty. But, gratefully they did with girl. I don't want them to be influenced by me about this thing. That's why I whised for a frozen heart, I don't want others to be influenced, until he came melt the ice only by his attitude and went away after he knew me. Then it freezing again. But thanks to him that I can felt the warm again even though it was short and wasn't influenced. That's why I love to see Tharn and Type or every couple in a drama having good relationship, let them be happy even it is a forbidden love. They have a right to be happy.

I do really love the way of Type for making up. I can't resist. He is so, cute. Sugar rush.... Yes Type, P'San is great to be hated. Why don't you tell him that Tharn is yours? See, Tharn also ask the same question. But you're not ready yet. Fine... Slowly, I understand, he also understand. "Don't forget what you have said" Type. He will never forget, Type, as long as you can have a good talk if both of you facing another problem.

MY GOD SUCH A TRIAL SENIOR. I'm done with P'San. Bad ending, next episode will full of tension again. This drama is complicated and tiring, even it just about a story of two persons.

See you soon pal.... I hope you like reading my review. I'm sorry if I sometimes put my personal matter in it. Hopefully it may help you to understand the situation or people like us. Or may be one of you have the same problem. Don't hesitate to tell me. We are at the same wheel. Cheer up...