#but i can tell you that my abdominal muscles didn't work for like two days after

[bisexualamy]

Transition Update #67: 1yr post hysto and 3 months post meta-as-phallo-stage-1

last update: hysto, phallo

Happy 1 year post hysto to me! This was the surgery I was most worried about getting. I had a lot of misconceptions going into my hysto consult, and really only did it to get bottom surgery. I thought I'd have to remove my ovaries (I didn't) and that T is a significant ovarian cancer risk (it isn't). I also had a very, very kind surgeon who was experienced working with trans patients.

Emotionally the hysto was the hardest for me, as the risk of getting pregnant and my cycle were the two things that made me most dysphoric. The recovery for this one was worse than my meta surgery, not in a pain or fatigue sense, but I was constantly checking up on a part of my body that I hated and the immediate post-op symptoms made me very, very dysphoric.

I didn't expect to feel much more comfortable in my body and my maleness when I got my hysto but I was wrong. I've had chronic lower abdominal pain for years because my discomfort with that part of my body caused me to involuntarily tense those muscles. I feel more relaxed in my body than I have been in a long time. Feeling my muscles slowly let go in the months after my hysto was really wonderful.

Before my hysto I was incapable of dating cis men (even though I'm bi) because of the pregnancy anxiety. It was so all-encompassing that I wouldn't even agree to dates with cis men I found attractive and I stayed away from gay clubs that mostly catered to gay men. Now I feel much more comfortable in those spaces and it's shown me what a lot of my cis gay friends have already been telling me which is that I always belonged there. My hysto also made me more comfortable enough in my body to explore trans-exclusive kink events and spaces. For the first time in a very long time I was able to see myself as attractive and not be skeptical of other people's attraction to me.

Phallo Updates:

I'm about 3 months post op the meta stage of my phallo. My next stage is being pushed back a few months so I can get my health and my graft site in better shape to lower complication risk. I had a lot of hair on my stomach and I didn't get enough laser sessions in, and currently my adipose tissue in my graft is too thick to support blood flow to the phallus post-op. I'm working with a nutritionist and lifting more weights to address this issue without focusing on weight loss, because that's better for both my physical and mental health.

All my minor complications went away except for my two-streaming. The surgeons say this is a very minor fistula that they'll patch next surgery. Fistula is another word that gets tossed around a lot when people fearmonger about phallo, and I was definitely scared of it before I went under. But, like everything, fistulas exist on a spectrum and only the extreme cases get spread around. I technically count in the percentage of people who had phallo complications, and all that meant for me was an extra month of at-home healing time, where I could still walk and perform all bodily functions, and my former urethra not closing full after UL. Neither of these affected my day-to-day life, they're just part of the larger process of understanding my new body and adjusting to it.

Anyway, all I'm saying is if phallo is something you want but you're scared by the information you've read online, some of that information is not giving you an accurate picture of reality. People don't usually write reviews for things that were fine but not incredible. Please pursue what's best for your transition and wait to talk to a doctor before you make any conclusions about how safe phallo is for you.

[hunieday]

Momo Sugao Rabbit Chat - Part 1 : Sugao Idol Feature

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5

Please note that I am not a professional translator and I'm only doing this to share the side materials to those who cannot access it, if you notice any mistakes please let me know nicely. Enjoy!

Takanashi Tsumugi: Momo-san, thank you for your hard work. IDOLiSH7 will also be featured in the “Sugao” special idol feature!

Takanashi Tsumugi: I’ve heard that Re:vale-san was the catalyst for this project.  We will do our best to make the most of the opportunity we've been given, so I look forward to working with you!

Momo: Thank you for your hard work, Maneko-chan~~~! (*´▽｀*) Thanks for contacting me!

Momo: I'm glad to be a part of this project with you guys!

Takanashi Tsumugi: Thank you very much for this valuable opportunity. I didn't expect to receive such a project from "Sugao", so I am very happy!

Momo: As you said, we were just the catalyst!

Momo: The idol feature story was given to us because we’re all active in our respective fields!

Momo: Let's work together to make it more exciting! (∩´∀｀)∩

Takanashi Tsumugi:

Takanashi Tsumugi: The theme of Momo-san’s issue was "tell your story with your back," right?

Takanashi Tsumugi: As for your back’s body make-up, I heard that the decision was made because of the wonderful backbone that you show to juniors as a senior!

Momo: Seems like it?! I was embarrassed when I heard from Okarin, too!

Momo: Does Momo-chan really talk with his back that much? (●´艸`)

Takanashi Tsumugi: Of course! I’ve learned so much from Re:vale-san…!

Takanashi Tsumugi: Obviously you give us advice and such, but you always care about our new songs and new jobs even though you are very busy, so it’s immensely encouraging for us.

Takanashi Tsumugi: The other day, when Mitsuki-san was the MC for a special program, he was delighted that Momo-san praised him!

Momo: That was really because Mitsuki’s MC power exploded! (*´∀｀)ｂ

Momo: He acted like a veteran, with his excellent banter and smooth turns during the talk.

Momo: It made me feel like I had to work hard as well!

Takanashi Tsumugi: I'm happy to hear you say that.

Mitsuki-san will be pleased to know that you respect him not only for his singing abilities, but also for his talk show stand-in prowess...!

Takanashi Tsumugi: We’ll continue to watch Momo-san's back and learn a lot from him!

Takanashi Tsumugi: 

Momo: I'll do my best to show my cool back to the juniors lolol

Momo: 

Momo: Oh yes, since we’re still on the topic of back muscles!

Momo: I've been putting a lot of effort into body make-up lately, so I plan on delivering a toned-up Momo-chan (｀・ω・´)＞

Takanashi Tsumugi: Of course, I'm looking forward to seeing that as well!

Momo: Maneko-chan, you work out a lot too, right?

Momo: You were very agile when you danced with Okarin and the others at the New Year's party!

Momo: You were super cool!

Takanashi Tsumugi:

Takanashi Tsumugi: My job requires a lot of physical strength, so I try not to miss muscle training as much as possible.

Takanashi Tsumugi: But it’s difficult to train the back muscles and other parts of the body that you can't see, so it creates a bit of an imbalance…

Momo: It's true that it's hard to see whether your back training is working or not!

Momo: If you want, can I send you a video of the intensive back training I recommend?

Momo: Yuki and I do it during breaks and it's a lot of fun ～ﾟヽ(*´∀`)ﾉﾟ.:｡+

Takanashi Tsumugi: wah...! Are you sure...! 

If you two are doing this, doesn’t that make it hard?

Momo: There are different levels from easy to hard!

Momo: We do the easy ones! Not so much for training, but more for the trainer's shouts? so lolol

Takanashi Tsumugi: There’s a lot of shouting involved…!

Momo: "Here we go, just like that! haaaa! hup, ho!” Yuki imitates him with a determined look on his face, so I laugh and can't concentrate at all ﾟ･(ﾉ∀｀)･ﾟ･｡

Momo: so I was training my back muscles, but at the same time my abdominal muscles were also being trained lololol

Takanashi Tsumugi: It has a double effect then, doesn't it? LOL! I would love to try that out!

Takanashi Tsumugi: 

Momo: If you keep listening to it, you'll get addicted to it, so give it a try lolol I'll send you the link to the video later~!

Takanashi Tsumugi: 

[typhin-hoofbun]

The number of times I've started to tell someone about my condition and the limitations it puts on me, only to get told some variant of "Eat better and do what exercise you can, and work your way back up to being more healthy" is insane.

I used to walk or ride a bike 1.5 miles each way to and from college. I grabbed 80+ pounds of luggage, wore 20 pound ankle weights, walked four miles to the Greyhound bus station, RAN the last quarter mile or so because I thought I was about to miss my bus, and didn't think twice about it. I biked 22 miles back and forth all over town chasing stores to get a Nintendo Wii.

I wore ankle weights and played DDR on Heavy Doubles when I worked at the arcade for two years. I hefted 2.5 gallon jugs of chlorine, two at a time, and strapped weights on my wrists when 50 pounds just wasn't effort anymore, for three years.

I ran face-first into the wall and I loved it, because every time I did, the wall scooted back another inch. I pushed my boundaries and expanded them. And it let me do things like pick up the heavy boxes people needed moved, the ones two-person teams were struggling with, and lift them like they were nothing. It let me say "I can go to the store and get that", and just DO it. I didn't bother getting a car in Missouri because I didn't need one.

And now I can't do three sit-ups without blacking out, because my blood pressure doesn't regulate correctly anymore. I can't play DDR. I can set it to Standard and do one and a half songs, and then I'm wiped out for the rest of the day, because whatever system handles fatigue signals doesn't work and I'm instantly tired. I can't stand up long enough to do a load of dishes. I can barely FUCKING SHOWER regularly. I'm in constant abdominal pain every single day, taking Gabapentin and Hydrocodone and getting giant fuck-off needles to inject Bupivacaine into my spine to SOMETIMES get it down to a 3/10. I can't take a goddamn SHIT without excruciating pain because the nerves in my gut are so messed up that the attempt causes the muscles to just go haywire. I haven't felt HUNGER in ten fucking years because of the nerve damage! I can barely remember what it even feels like, this fundamental sensation common to every single life form on the planet, EXCEPT ME.

I lost a $90k/year programming job, the dream job I've wanted since I was goddamn THREE YEARS OLD, to end up struggling to subsist on the tiny disability payments the government keeps trying to take away from me. Keeps trying to push me off of.

And people keep trying to tell me "If you only put in a little effort, you'd get there again." As if I'm some stranger to putting in effort. I wore ankle weights every single day in college because it was FUN to charge up staircases two steps at a time with a full backpack and a laptop bag and beat the people taking the elevator. And now I have to lay down on the couch for an hour every time I come out of the bathroom, to rest and recover.

Fuck. Your. Goddamn. Secret Garden.

(Yeah, I got some rage about this. No, I'm not apologizing. Yes, I will still be the sweetest, friendliest person I can be to everyone I can. And just because someone else out there "has it worse", it doesn't mean you can't be upset about the stuff happening to you. Don't let anyone, including and especially me, make you feel invalid for facing difficulty in life. "So-and-so has it worse" is a bullshit take that deserves to die in a fire, it's the equivalent of saying "You can't be happy because there exists someone else who has it better than you." Fuck. That. Live your fucking life, as much as your body lets you!)

I think disabled and chronically ill people should start using Secret Garden as a verb

[katrinacpeterson-blog]

Story time friends! So if you knew me way back when 2014-2015 I was "super in shape" in terms of what I looked like! But let me tell you it was not in a healthy balanced way at all! I had a lot of personal stress going on at that time and my response to that was to eat A LOT but to also work out super crazy all the time sometimes two times a day and never listening to my body even when it was screaming for rest! Mentally I really put a hurting on myself and this lead to binge eating disorder and no I didn't go to a doctor and get professionally diagnosed with it but when you over eat to the point of vomiting... Id say I had it.. looking at all the behaviors of it I checked off each one! But anyway externally I was 'healthy' but internally I was ill! I would do things like lay on the floor and suck suck suck in my stomach to see how skinny I could look, mentally I was bruised in terms of body image and what health really was! At the end of 2015 I finally was absolutely fed up with the lifestyle I was living and the mental pressure I was putting on myself and my body and that is when I started studying Exercise Science and really diving into researching the healthy lifestyle I wanted to live as well as represent! I literally just research any topic that I have questions on, anything that can help me improve my healthy balanced lifestyle and anything that someone asks me that I may not have the complete full answer too! Through research journal articles, studies, university kinesiology studies, videos, DR. blog sites, etc, etc, the list goes on, is how I grew my knowledge on exercise and nutrition. With that being said, I started my blog page @thephysio.co ( I haven't posted on there in awhile because now that Im done school I have time to do more things that I haven't been able to do in years!) But back in February I did some research on HYPOPRESSIVE BREATHING, it was soon after that I saw @alanablanchard doing it who then explained that @corerecoverypt taught her and this is where I really enjoyed her style of practice and I began to incorporate it into my everyday life! Now...TMI but I have gut issues and have since I came into this world! I have never felt my digestion feel so good and I thank hypopressive breathing for that! Your working your internally core muscles and helping contract the organs that are within that area! It has done wonders for my digestion! Also from what I have read it is beneficial to anyone with back issues, prolapse, hernias, woman with pelvic floor dysfunction after having babies and with just all around making your core look leaner and toned! Which is what most people these days are looking for! But if you too want to feel an improvement in your abdominal health I would absolutely recommend this style of training. If you want to give it a try dont just go winging it because like any exercise you can do it wrong and potentially get hurt so do your research or dont hesitate to ask questions that I can hopefully answer or point you in the right direction to find your answer!