#but i am never gonna be the blandly neutral person i suspect | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

thepoisonroom · 1 year ago

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probably taking your post too seriously, but it’s really nice to have a friend who says “can I kill them for you” when you tell them about a shitty person in your life. like I’m sorry, I’m sick of the therapy talk. tell me how you’d gut my boss because he yelled at me.

lmao no genuinely like when you've been hurt sometimes you need someone to be like "that person is a shithead for hurting you i'm gonna clothespin them upside-down by their toes" none of this mutual friend diplomatic neutrality where they're like "omg that sucks but there ARE two sides to every story so i AM gonna fuck with this person still lol"

#the one time i was in a legitimately emotionally abusive situation it did help that that guy like. didn't have any other friends #so i didn't have to listen to anyone defend him when i was already struggling to feel like my hurt was legitimate #i can't imagine how much harder hearing that would've made things for me #so i do err maybe too much on the side of being like okay i will validate these negative feelings bc my loyalty lies with my friend #like i'll tell people if i think they're being shitty or thinking in extremes in a way that's hurting them #but i am never gonna be the blandly neutral person i suspect #anonymous #ask and receive #i have to admit that sometimes when i talk to my friends who ARE good at bland neutrality about things that upset me #it can make me feel like they think my hurt feelings matter less than every single other person's feelings in the world #like you could just say 'damn that sucks'#but that's why you aometimes have to be selective about where you go for validation instead of resenting people for acting as they always do

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