#but he is reminiscent of the feeling of pain and death; like Cole is as well

[starlingstalk]

[terrifyingstories]

@lingeringscars: that’s what we do. we look out for each other.

the note of fear in cole’s voice - unmasked, without his usual coating of dire pessimism or short temperedness, startles ramse more than the cold. for as many close calls and brushes with death as each of them have had, it doesn’t seem possible that ramse has never seen him afraid before, because - well, fear is just kind of a part of the life they live. it’s just rare for it to be so pronounced; fear is just that thing that keeps them moving, keeps them from getting sloppy. it flares up every time they see tracks or cross paths with a scav or their supply runs out and they’ve crossed miles upon miles without seeing a hint of game or so much as a could-be-poisonous-but-it’s-probably-fine berry tree (god, he could’ve killed cole), but that’s just life. 

cole, as a rule, is much more likely to get angry than scared. ramse knows he is when he gets shorter and meaner than usual and all already-severely-lacking caution and restraint falls to the wayside. he’s usually pretty good at minding the difference between a cole that needs a pep-talk, ass-whup, and no intervention at all, just the usual banter no matter how many times he bites. but cole doesn’t sound angry now - he sounds young in a way neither of them ever got to be, which pulls on ramse’s heart strings, at least the ones he can still feel, anyway.

he knows cole isn’t much warmer than he is, even though ramse slept up flush against a hard layer of snow in the night while cole slept up close to him. but cole’s a hardy little shit, as hardy as he can be angry and brash, and maybe as lonely - and ramse’s fared worse this winter. he’d like to think from taking on the worst of the cold, but it’s more likely from giving too much lip as a kid (his attitude couldn’t compare to cole’s, but only one of them had had roberta for a mother. she’d haunt his ass.)

still, cole’s hand on his cheek feels impossibly and distinctly not-freezing, and he’s sorry to see it go when he has to roll to his side to let out a wet, painful cough that leaves his vision spotty. 

cole follows up the tender remark (we look out for each other, he’d said. it was a remarkably polite way for cole to say i’m not leaving you here, dipshit, so buck the fuck up, and it made ramse nervous) with a frightened, “rams?” and he knows he’s got to do something.

“like you looked out for my clothes when i decided to wash up in that stream?” it’s a little ragged, but it does well enough, gets a laugh out of cole that warms him more than the hand. ramse laughs, too, and neither of them comment on the wetness of it, like it’s getting caught in an angry tide on the way out. 

“hey,” cole barks back with a laugh, playfully accusing, “you loved that bit.”

“yeah, even more when that pack of scavs snuck up on us with my pants around my ankles.”

cole lays down beside him now, arms folded behind his head in a relaxed kind of way they never get more than a few minutes of these days, that almost kind of aches a little because the tightness never actually goes away. he laughs again, a light, reminiscent sort of laugh. ramse finds himself curling toward him a bit, head kinked just slightly to the side, temple grazing cole’s shoulder. 

he really, really can’t die. 

cole needs to laugh. it’s what keeps him human, keeps that bravery of his from spiraling into scavenger bloodthirst. so ramse tells another joke, and it keeps them both alive another hour, which is all anyone can really ask for. 

[spidernerdsblog]

Love Is The Biggest Spell : Chapter Two

A/N: Chapter two is here. They meet, they part. Fate has put forth a test will they pass through it? Hope you like this chapter . Feedbacks and suggestions are always welcome.

Pairing : Warlock Tom Holland x half mortal reader

Summary : Witches are forbidden to fall in love with mortals. But what if your long lost love returns to you as a mortal, can you defy your heart? Any spell any magic seems useless in front of the magic of love. Let’s join our lovers in their magical conquest beyond life and death as they fight for their love unravelling dark mysteries of the past along their way.

Warnings : none.

Mini Playlist : Find you by Nick Jonas.

You turned to find a young handsome brunette most probably of your age you assumed, his soft hazel brown eyes could gaze deep into your soul. He was a man of expensive taste as you noticed his Louboutin shoes and Prada ensemble he was wearing. You found it quite extravagant for a walk in the forest but who are you to judge plus he was kinda cute too if you aren’t to lie. You gave a puzzled look when you heard him address you as Amber. 

For Tom time stood still, his eyes transfixed on you. Is this a dream or is it really you? Amber, his Amber after so many years when everybody told him to move on, he still kept his hopes alive that one day you will return as you had promised to him 25 years ago at this exact spot. And here you are again standing in front of him looking at him with those ever curious eyes and that adorable face. He was broken out of the daze as soon as you started speaking. 

“Uh I think you are mistaken I’m not Amber" 

"Huh!.. He blinked his eyes a few times. "sorry you just look quite similar to someone I know.. I mean knew.” he stuttered.

“It’s ok, happens sometimes. Umm can you help me to find a way out from here? I’m kinda lost actually.”

“Sure love why not. It’s this way.“ Tom showed you the way. You lifted your leg to walk as a sharp pain in your right leg made you wince. 

"Oww!” you cried out. Tom looked back and hastily came back to your aid. 

“Is everything okay?” he says with concern. 

“Yeah it’s actually I think I twisted my leg.” you scrunch your face. 

“What!? let me see.” without a second thought he crouched down and lifted your leg in his hands. You were a little taken aback as you leaned on him holding his shoulder for support. 

“uh it’s.. It’s okay you don’t have to, I can walk slowly.” But he did not listen as he took off your shoe and examined your ankle. 

“Trust me I can make it right. Just close your eyes” you closed your eyes and he recited a healing spell in his mind gently rubbing his hand over your ankle. He understood from the very beginning that you don’t remember anything so not to raise any suspicion in your mind he gripped your ankle firmly and gave it a little twist. 

“Does it hurt now?” he asked. You rotated your ankle and you were shocked that the pain had magically gone away. 

“Wow how did you do that?!" 

"Told you. I learnt that when I used play football in highschool" 

"Great!" 

"So now we are ready to go I guess?" 

"Yes,all thanks to you.” both of you strolled side by side along the uneven path of the forest. 

“So if you don’t mind may I have the pleasure to know the beautiful lady’s name?”

“Yes for sure.” You giggled

“It’s Y/N.. Y/N Warren. By the way what is my saviour’s name?" 

"Thomas.. Thomas Stanley Holland you can call me Tom." 

"Thanks Tom for helping me out." 

"Oh it’s my pleasure." 

You continued walking, occasionally stealing glances at each other. Every time you looked at him your heart clenched, a weird feeling creeping inside you as if you have known him for ages but everything now seems to be a blur. On the other hand Tom was feeling restless. A thousands of questions bubbling inside him waiting to erupt. For him you seemed to be unreachable, far away in spite of being so close. He could see the path coming to an end leading you out of the forest which meant you will be gone and he did not want that to happen. He wanted to stop this moment forever, he just wanted to touch you, hold you, kiss you, never letting you go again. 

Atlast you were out of the deep forest. Your friends caught sight of you and came rushing towards you

"Oh! Y/N! there you are.” Jane heaved a sigh of relief. 

“I was so worried baby. Where were you?” Cole hugged you planting a kiss on your forehead. 

“I got lost then this gentleman helped me find the way.” you turned to find no one. 

“Strange, he was right behind me.” You frowned. 

“Leave you are safe, that’s all it matters." 

"Can we go now? We are already late. ” Tony quipped. 

“Yeah.” You absentmindedly followed them constantly looking back eyes searching for your mystery saviour. 

Tom saw you go from behind the trees. He went back to the Academy of Mystic Arts. 

He walked past the halls as Jacob saw him walking briskly with a frown on his face . He minced his way towards him and stopped him midway

“Tom I know you’re angry but can you leave Remy for today?” 

“I don’t have time for all your nonsense so just go away." Tom said irritatedly. "And yes tell him if he ever thinks of harming her again he will see the worse of me.” Saying so he raced to the library. 

“What brings you to the library Thomas? You’re the best warlock of this academy where did you find difficulty in spellcasting?” Charles the librarian asked.

“I need everything you have on ancient magic of rebirth, soul transfer, spirit channeling and bring them fast” He demanded. Charles handed him all the books he asked for. 

He took the books and rushed back home. After reaching home he ran to his room and placed the books on his bed with a loud thud. He frantically searched the books, he desperately needed to know how were you able to take birth as a human. He completely lost track of time as he paced along his room turning the pages of the book. And suddenly Tom’s eyes went to a dusty guitar kept at a corner of his room as memories flashed back. 

“I really love it when you play the guitar. You said with admiration in your eyes.” 

“These hands will only strum on these strings just for you and no one else. He said.” And as he had said he literally stopped playing guitar after he lost you. 

But something today urged him to hold on to it again. He picked up the guitar as he dusted away the dirt that had collected on it all these years and sat on the window sill of his room. He strummed on the guitar playing the chords looking at the night sky. Amid the starlight was the ever glow of the moon, that mother of the sky whom watched over every beating heart, steady and true. He sang.   

I look for you in the center of the sun

I took a pill but it didn’t help me numb

I see your face even when my eyes are shut

But I never really know just where to find you

Your smiling face flashed in front of him. He felt content as you felt like a beam of sunshine radiating love and happiness which filled the void in him. 

I taste the words that keep falling out your mouth

You got a logic I’ll never figure out

If I could hold you then I’d never put you down

But I never really know just where to find you

Where to find you

Where to find you

But I never really know just where to find you

Every time you spoke it felt like music to his ears. He didn't knew how much starved he was to hear your voice until now. 

Try, try, try, but I

Try, try, try, but I, but I

Try, try, try, but I

But I never really know just where to find you

You think you know how to get under my skin

It’s good for now but it’s never permanent

Knock on the door but there’s no one listening

And I never really know just where to find you

He reminisced about the time back then when you knew him. 

“Amber! Amber!” Tom called out he could hear your distant giggles echoing in the forest. 

“C'mon love this ain’t funny!” You tiptoed behind him and covered his eyes with your hand from the back.

“Guess who?” You whispered. A smile spread across his face. 

“My little witch.” He held your hand turning around. 

“I love to see you get all riled up.” you giggled. 

“Ha ha very funny.” 

“What will you do if I really vanish one day?” You wiggled your brows playfully, Tom immediately placed his hand over your mouth.

“No, don’t say that ever again and even if that happens I’ll find you with everything I have.” 

“Where will I find my solace anyways other than these arms? You slipped your hands to his back embracing him and pecked his lips. 

But you had left him. Though it wasn’t your fault. You were taken away from him by those treacherous mortals.

You live for love but you never really tried

You say it’s not but it’s always on your mind

Keep chasing gold but you lose a silver line

But I never really know just where to find you

Where to find you

Where to find you

But I never really know just where to find you

You were never a person who used to express her feelings openly, maybe that had to do with you being a fire witch. But with Tom you were a different person he had this calming effect on you that made you feel safe and happy.

You were sitting under a tree reading a book, Tom was lying down his head resting on your lap. 

“They told me not to play with fire, and I should’ve listened because I got burned by your soul and you left me in the ashes.”

“What sort of cheesy pickup line is this?” you snorted.

“I’m trying to be romantic here, love.”

“As if you aren’t already?” Keeping your book aside you knelt down to his face and kissed him. 

Try, try, try, but I

Try, try, try, but I, but I

Try, try, try, but I

But I never really know just where to find you

Maybe I’m chasing a feeling

Maybe I don’t even need it, but

Maybe you’re looking for me tonight, tonight

Though are these feelings legit anymore? When he knows that he doesn’t exist in your memories. His heart pangs to know that there is another man in your life. 

What kind of twisted game fate has put you both into. He wanted you back but not like this where you don’t remember him. Where he is not anymore part of your life. 

I look for you in the center of the sun

I took a pill but it didn’t help me numb

I see your face even when my eyes are shut

Meanwhile you were back at home as you looked out of your window in your room. The sun had set and the full moon was shining in the clear night sky, radiating its soft light over the earth. Since childhood you had a strange attraction towards the moon. You gazed at the moon intently. 

But I never really know just where to find you

Where to find you

Where to find you

But I never really know just where to find you

Try, try, try, but I

Try, try, try, but I, but I

Try, try, try, but I

But I never really know just where to find you

Tom stared in the direction of the moon and he saw a glimpse of your face.

“Whenever you feel lost just look at the moon. You’ll get your answers.”  

You once told this to Tom but he didn’t understand the meaning behind your words back then. Witches can see future and you must have known what the future holds for you. And now it was clear to him what you had meant. You are the answer to his questions. Only you can solve the mystery of the past, your past.

“You seem to be quite in a good mood. Really good to see you playing the guitar after such a long time. What’s the matter?"  Harrison walked into his room.

"It’s Amber, Harrison! I knew she would come back, she can’t break her promise.” Tom exclaimed.

“Wait, wait what are you talking about?" 

"I saw Amber today in the woods!" 

"Tom are you sure you weren’t hallucinating? We can call the doctor if you want” Harrison gave a puzzled look.

“Harrison trust me." 

“So where is she then?And where was she all these years?”

“I don’t know.” 

“What do you mean you don’t know?” 

“I didn’t have the time to ask her anything and she doesn’t seem to remember anything. And also her name is not Amber, it’s Y/N.” 

“So how will you find her again?”

“I don’t know but I’ll find her.” 

You had zoned out looking out of your window and suddenly you had a blurry vision 

“Promise me you’ll come back.” You saw two broad hands holding yours and then the person raised one of his hands to caress your cheek, you lifted your eyes to meet his and you had a glimpse of your mystery savior from the forest as he knelt down to kiss you. You shook your head to bring yourself to reality, blinking your eyes a few time as you exhaled deeply. This was weird, you never had a vision like that before, not when you were awake and why did you see Tom. 

……………………………

Next day was a busy day for Tom and Harrison. For the first time in 25 years they had stepped in the mortal side of the town in search of you. They inquired about your whereabouts to some of the people in the town and they got to know about the coffee shop you work in. 

“Sometimes I hate the fact that you are my best friend and I can’t even say no to you. What are we doing in this stinky mortal world Tom?! Bloody murderers!” He scoffed opening the door of the cafe to get inside. 

“To find Amber!”

“How do you know that we will find her here?

“I just know, I feel her.” You were busy placing the utensils in the dishwasher at the back of the store as you heard the bell chime that hung on the door

“Just a moment coming!” You shouted from the back. You quickly fixed your dress and walked back to the counter wiping your hands with a towel. 

“Sorry for keeping you wait… You stopped in the middle of your sentence as you saw your new customers sitting near the counter engrossed in their phones. Tom cocked his head up from his phone. You noticed today he was quite informally dressed in a plain white t-shirt paired with blue jeans. 

“Heyyy.. it’s you!” You said excitedly. Your eyes met as Tom’s whole face lit up, he quickly glanced at you in a baby pink uniform  with a white apron tied around your waist. The uniform hugging your body perfectly, accentuates your features. You looked cute, he thought. On the other hand Harrison’s jaw dropped in shock. 

“Tom right?” 

“Yup.” 

“I was looking for you but you just vanished, didn’t get to thank you for helping me.” 

“Uh sorry I had got some emergency.” 

Harrison was still staring at you intently. Your attention shifted to the blue eyed blonde sitting beside Tom and you felt intimidated. 

“Umm have we met before?” You asked. 

“Uh.. no you just look quite familiar to someone I know.” He stuttered. 

“This is the second time I’m hearing this.” you looked at them skeptically and again turned to the blonde 

“So you are?”

“Harrison.. Harrison Osterfield.”

“Never seen you guys in this town though, new here?” They looked at each others faces .

“Umm not new but we moved here recently after finishing our studies from London. Our family owns the Runeshire winery.

“Holy shit!! You are the Hollands that is why I was thinking that I heard the name somewhere. 

“I always wanted to go to London though.’’

‘’I can take you if you want.’’ Tom offered innocently.

‘’That will be so kind of you Thomas.’’ you bent down on the counter resting your chin in your palm.

“So what would you London boys like to have?’’ 

“What would the damsel in distress recommend?’’ He shot back. 

“That will be just for one time Tommy boy I’m more than a damsel in distress.”  you arched a sly brow.

“And I would like to recommend our Fall special ‘Vanilla, earl grey, and lavender latte’ is that ok with you lads?”

“More than okay, darling” he grinned. You pursed you lips with a sly look in your eyes straightening yourself over the counter. You went to get their order. Tom turned to Harrison who was still recovering from the shock of seeing you. 

“So what do you think? Or are you hallucinating too?’’ Tom grinned. 

“Shut up! I still don’t think that she’s Amber.’’ Tom was about to say something as he stopped seeing you coming.

“Here you go.’’ You served them their orders and slided two plates of cheesecakes. 

“This is on the house.’’ You winked. “A little thank you gesture for the other day.’’ 

Cole dropped in after sometime. You excused yourself and went to him. 

“Hey babe.’’ He wrapped his arms around your waist pressing you tightly against his chest. 

“Hi darling.’’ You smiled as he knelt down to kiss you pressing your foreheads.

“Jeez guys get a room!’’ Jane came out from the back. 

“At Least someone is getting it.’’ Cole quipped

“Whatever..’’ She rolled her eyes. 

“Aww don’t get disheartened sweetie we have two new hot lads straightway from London right over there.” you pointed to the direction where Tom and Harrison were sitting.”Wanna take your chance?’’ You smirked quirking your brow. 

“By the way I really like the brunette he was the one I was talking about the other day. He’s cute don’t you think?’’ you both started gossiping totally ignoring your boyfriend standing right beside you hearing you crushing upon some random bloke. Cole cleared his throat to make you aware of his presence. 

“I’m still here.”

“So what? As if you don’t check out other girls when I’m not with you.’’ You sneered. 

"I think I'm gonna give it a shot." Jane chirped looking at their direction.

"You got this girl! Go get some! You patted her back encouragingly.

Tom’s was looking to your direction with a hardened gaze his jaw clenched. He was fuming from inside seeing you with Cole a tinge of jealousy and possessiveness creeping inside him

“I think Amber is quite intelligent enough in her new life and decided to move on.’’ Harrison teased. 

“She just doesn’t remember anything.’’ Tom reasoned. 

“Tom, how can you be so sure that she is Amber? She just looks like her.’’

“Would you like to order anything else?’’ Jane interrupted them. 

“No thank you, love.’’ Harrison said in his British accent and Jane felt butterflies inside her.  It was love at first sight or to be precise voice. She gazed at the blue eyed boy with sun kissed hair with heart eyes. Tom noticed that, a smirk forming on his face. He motioned Harrison with his eyes signalling him to carry on the conversation to dig some more information from her. 

“How long have you girls been working here?’’ 

“Oh it’s just me who works here part time, Y/N and her aunt literally owns this shop; it’s her family shop you see.’’ Jane answered by tucking her locks behind her ear. 

“So what else do you do?’’ 

"Still studying. Part time journalism at the city College. We all are classmates ’’ 

“Great! By the way nice tea.’’ 

“Thank you.’’ Harrison and Tom got up to leave.

“Maybe we can talk a little more over a cup of tea when you are free some other day. See you again, Jane Miller.’’ He read out her name from her name badge and gave her a subtle wink. Jane was swept off her feet, she felt dizzy her cheeks heating up blushing profusely, heart beating faster than usual. 

After getting out of the shop they teleported themselves to Tom’s house. 

“That went well.’’ Tom remarked. 

“These humans are petty creatures. A little sweet talk makes them swoon over anyone.’’ 

"I think she really likes you.’’ 

“What’s there to not like about me anyways?” Harrison sassed. 

“But your Amber likes someone else, what are you gonna do about that? Tom as your best mate it’s my advice that you forget her. Even if she is Amber she is a human and you know the rules. This time your love is truly forbidden.’’ 

“I don’t care about some stupid rules the only thing I care is what Amber wants. Unless she says that she doesn’t want me in her life I’m not giving up on her.’’

“Tom she’s a human now totally powerless even if you are successful to make her remember everything. The coven will not let her be alive. You will be putting her life into danger.”

“She was much more powerful than all of us and I’m not ready to believe that she has lost her powers.’’ 

“But I don’t see any signs of powers in her.’’ 

“I have seen back at the forest how the branch that Remy tried to throw on her dodged away from her. It has to be a protection spell.’’ 

“Or just sheer luck.’’ Harrison taunted.

“By the way she was a fire elemental witch, you touched her ankle right? Did she feel feverish?’’

“No but maybe it is different when you are reborn as human. She was a Hecatean witch who knows.’’ 

“Tom we know very little about them. And moving forward with just our assumptions will be just useless.’’ 

“We don’t know but the Hecatean witches will know.’’

“Tom have you gone insane?! Amber was the last one of their clan.’’

“Harrison you are in such a state of denial that you have forgotten that we can perform seance. We can summon Helena the mother of elements, Amber’s great grandmother.’’ 

“But for that we need something that belonged to her to perform the summoning spell for the seance.’’ Harrison pointed out. 

“I have her hairpin Amber used to wear that every time. It was given to her as a family heirloom.’’ 

“Then what are we waiting for? Let’s get started. By the way when we are doing a seance why don’t you just ask her if Amber is alive or not? That will clear a lot of things in the first place.’’ 

Tom and Harrison drew a pentacle in the middle of the room and placed candles around it. They sat down closing their eyes as they concentrated and summoned the spirits. 

“Spirits below and above, spirits in between, caught in the fabric betwixt worlds, we ask that the veil be lifted and that you send forth the spirit of Helena. Helena, you’re welcome to this house, to this circle. If you’re here, we ask that you make your presence known.’’

A gust of wind started blowing out of nowhere, shallow whispers filled the room

“What do you want from me?’’ A celestial voice echoed in the room. 

“Oh mother of the four elements we wanted to know about your great granddaughter Amber, is she alive?” Tom reckoned. 

“No, Amber is no more; she was meant to be the best of us and to fulfill the prophecy and her destiny she had to die to be reborn from her ashes just like the phoenix.’’

“Does that mean she still has her powers? Tom asked. 

“She is a half witch, mortal blood runs in her veins but once she turns 25 she will get back all her powers.’’ 

“But how do we know if she has her powers? Please enlighten us with the knowledge of elementary magic.’’ He requested. 

“Elemental Witches are the first witches that have existed on our planet, even long before the first humans. It is said that they were created by nature to control the elements and create a peaceful nature, so that the mankind can live on Earth.”   

“Amber was fire elemental, fierce and powerful. A Fire Witch is a rare and dangerous creature, who can cause great healing or great destruction with their magic. A fire witch’s temperament is fickle at best, swinging from a warm disposition to raging inferno at the slightest provocation. Rage runs in her blood that she channels through her magic. I think now you understand what you need to do to reveal her true form but be careful the fire witch is able to hold congress with flames as easily as a pet and is able to cause mass destruction in its manipulation. Being a half witch she isn’t aware of her powers and might lose control over herself so be extremely cautious with whatever you do.” And with that the whooshing sound of the wind stopped blowing out the candles the room went dark and an eerie silence prevailed in the room.

“So we have to make her angry. And how do you plan to do that?’’ Harrison broke the silence.

“First I need to get close to her and know her again. And that can only be possible if we.’’ Tom puckered his eyebrows thinking.

“Please don’t say you are actually thinking of doing that.’’ 

“Yes you are right, get ready to  become a university transfer student, mate.’’ Tom winked.

…………………………………………………………………..

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Taglist:To be added send me an ask or message I’ll be happy to add you in the following chapters.

[pbpress]

J. Cole’s KOD Is His Most Important Album

by Gabriel Girault

I’m gonna say something truly controversial, J. Cole’s KOD is album of the year and his most important album ever made. Recently in the rap genre two artists have passed away. In 2017 Lil Peep died at 21 and Mac Miller recently passed this November at 26. Both died because of their use of drugs. Looking at a lot of recent rap albums there is a glorification of drugs. J. Cole’s KOD takes a set back and says we have a problem. He sees the increase of drug use in our society and says let's fix this. According to drugabuse.org “More than 72,000 Americans died from drug overdoses in 2017”. So Cole made it his mission to fight this epidemic because he has grown. When Cole was younger he would rap about drugs and his lifestyle, but now that he’s older he sees the damage rapping like that causes. He uses his growth on this album to convey a message of how harmful addiction can be. KOD has three meanings. Kill Our Demons, King OverDose, and Kids On Drugs. The first meaning is obvious he wants us to kill our demons, the things that haunt us, and the things we are addicted to. Kids on drugs is also quite simple too, we are a generation who grew up with drugs all around us, whether they are medical or recreational. King OverDose represents the times that Cole has gone through addiction himself and failed to properly find help.

The albums starts out softly with “Intro” which gives the thesis to the album: “There are many ways to deal with this pain--choose wisely”. So immediately you as the listener know that this album will be dealing with pain and crucial decisions that need to be made. Once the song ends, the entire mood changes. Cole turns away from his usual style of rapping and beat making to use trap beats. Trap beats are usually solely made using computers and have a feeling that keeps you light and happy. In 2018 rappers tend to rap about drugs, fighting, guns, and alcohol on trap beats. Trap beats are seldom used to produce a message. This was an important decision. J. Cole’s last album 4 Your Eyez Only received harsh criticism because it was “boring”. He used soft beats to rap about family, love, death, etc.. The topics were deep and emotional. But for this album he switched over to trap beats. You don’t have to be a producer to understand the difference in sound. Go listen to “She’s Mine, pt. 2” and then go listen to “ATM” there is a clear difference in style. In “She’s Mine, Pt. 2” Cole is rapping about his friend’s newborn daughter and has the same reaction to his own newborn son. How he would do anything for his son and now his life is changed. In “ATM” which means “Addicted To Money” J. Cole raps about money and the chorus of the song is, “Count it up, count it up, count it up, count it”, obviously this song isn’t trying to go for a deep-hearted meaning.  4 Your Eyez Only was targeted towards his fans, the people who love his style because it’s therapeutic. KOD is targeted towards the people with pain but decide to turn to drugs instead of seek help. Many new artists who all use trap beats promote the use of opioids to the extent that I believe they are unknowingly promoting opioid usage to more and more minors. So Cole using trap beats is him directly telling them to listen up. He disguises his message with something they think will promote their poor decisions. Now the title song “KOD” mostly is about fame and growing up, but there’s a few important lines you may miss when going through the song. “It run through my vein. I think it's workin', it's numbin' the pain… and I’m somewhat insane”. Make sure to read that twice. The narrator of this song is talking about him taking this drug and how it’s now messing with his head. The drug worked for a second and then he became worse than he was before. The ending of the song has a small voice whisper almost if it’s the narrator's inner voice like the beginning of the album. The soft voice told the narrator “choose wisely”, but after taking the drug on “KOD” the conscience has become corrupted and is now telling him to become worse by taking harder drugs. This is the beginning of his downfall.

Now a few songs into the album you hear “The Cut Off” and the first feature in the album appears. An artist named kiLL edward appeared seemingly out of nowhere. Now you might be wondering who kiLL edward is; well it’s J. Cole. In an interview with Angie Martinez, Cole told her that kiLL edward represents the things about him he wants to get rid of or “kill”, it is also a representation of his ex step-dad named Edward. Edward caused a lot of pain and suffering to Cole and his family when Cole was younger. It took Jermaine a long time to find out how to cope with his suffering but while he was “kiLL edward” his method of coping was unhealthy. In “The Cut Off” he raps from his old mentality, “Let me float. I'm a cloud, comin' down. Put me down, gentle now... Bottom line, I can't cope. If I die, I don't know. I don't know”. Cole in this drugged state has become complacent and dangerously care free. These drugs have made it so that he doesn’t even care about his own life. Through this culture of drug use he finds his only coping through self-destructive behavior. There is no end for him, he becomes engulfed in this loop that tries to keep him high but he soon finds himself sad and alone.

Sadly the ability and knowledge to cope was something he didn’t have when he was younger. In “Once an Addict” he reminisces on his mother. When Edward left his mother, she fell into a deep depression where she started heavily drinking and abusing hard drugs. Cole couldn’t watch her do this anymore, so he started staying out later, “I used to stay out later on purpose. Subconsciously I was nervous that if I came home early then what would surface was her inner demons. And then I'd have to end up seein' my hero on ground zero”. He was scared to see his mother like this. His source of strength is deteriorating due to her drug usage. She did not know how to cope and ended up abusing alcohol instead of facing her problems. His allusion to ground zero is actually quite brilliant. Ground Zero is where the most damage is done whether it’s an attack or a disaster. Observing her crash is basically like seeing a bomb explode and not doing anything but try to get away. He eventually he fled to New York City for college and tried to get away from this problem. But a problem like this doesn't just disappear. Cole ends the song in a deep reflection wishing he did more to help his mother instead of run.

The evolution of J. Cole is one that should be closely looked at. When he started he was a young rapper who just graduated college, and now he has become a husband and father. There is a clear change and growth. He would occasionally rap about his drug use and money, but as he’s grown so has his music. He now talks about how drug abuse and desire for money are things that stunt a person’s personal growth. If you don’t like J. Cole because of his music or personality, you have to give him credit for trying to make a change. He looked at the world we are living in and tried to make a change. So many artists talk about their drug use in a positive way that in ends up hurting their fans. It’s time for a change and that’s what KOD is.

[samprestonbigbadabruce]

NXT Takeover: New Orleans - Thoughts and Review...

Sunday 8th April has been a very difficult day, due to my having to avoid any and all spoilers for this show. Normally, I’ll either watch the event live, or watch it at a later date knowing the results. But for a show like this, one that could legitimately be one of the best of the year, I wanted to immerse myself fully into the show, not knowing any results at all. Oh, NXT, you have made me your bitch with ease.

Of course, we have Mauro Ranallo (the one and only legend), Nigel McGuinness (who has really grown into the role fantastically), and Percy Watson (who has demonstrated some good commentary when given the chance), who are probably the strongest 3 man team on the commentary booth. My predictions are at this link.

Ladder Match for the inaugural NXT North American Championship.

EC3 (Ethan Carter III) vs Killian Dain vs Adam Cole vs Velveteen Dream vs Lars Sullivan vs Ricochet

The audience already knows who Ricochet is, his name resonating around the arena, and he gets the first major pop with a tremendous Shooting Star Press to the outside on Dain and Lars. Ricochet is so crisp and beautiful to watch in the ring, he’s instantly fascinating. One of the sub-plots of the match was the build-up to Lars and Dain facing each other, bumping into each other a few times, before an awesome tope onto Lars early on. Watching Lars throw a ladder onto his five opponents was a great moment, he’s starting to convince me he may be more than just a big hoss. He took a great powerbomb from Ricochet, Dream and EC3 off the ladder.

I loved EC3 & Cole, the two snakes who will just as soon betray you as use you, getting along briefly, before EC3 stole Cole’s “bay bay” Schtick, and super kicking EVERYBODY’s face off. The next big moment was Dream’s beautiful Elbow off the ladder onto Lars, some tremendous elevation. Bringing the ladders in so quickly seemed like a better method as it allowed them to hit the ground running. Killian’s Vader Bomb with Cole on his back onto EC3 under a ladder was reminiscent of Rikishi flattening Val Venis off the top of a cage. Lars Sullivan and Killian Dain throwing Ricochet back and forth was akin to two T-Rexes fighting over a pork chop, I laughed, but Lars catching Killain was awe inspiring. And then Ricochet beat it with a moonsault off a falling ladder onto Cole & Dain, that’s Highlight Reel material. Ricochet is coming across very impressive in this match, as I expected.

Dream’s rolling Death Valley Driver on Ricochet onto a ladder was terrifying, but looked amazing, then Lars SMASHING EC3 onto Dream THROUGH a ladder, just raised the bar again, only for Dain to metaphorically go for “Hold My Beer” and put Cole & Ricochet through his own ladder! This is insanity and I love it. I love the subtlety of having the two hosses, Lars & Killain, on one ladder, then the two heels Cole & EC3 on another ladder, and then Dream opening up the third, each ladder representing a different style, culminating in Ricochet joining him. Cole took down EC3, Ricochet took down Dream, and STILL the two beasts were on the ladder. And just as Lars was near victory, Ricochet made the save, the competitors continuously nearing so close, then getting knocked off, before Adam Cole stole the title!

I love how the match allows each style to get their own moment in the sun, either Lars smashing people, Killian’s agile destructions, Ricochet & Dream’s high-flying antics and great bumping, Cole’s smarmy opportunist, or EC3’s arrogant smarts, none were underutilised. I was surprised at the choice for Cole to win, I thought EC3 would make more sense as a heel for the others to chase, but Cole has earned the title, he’ll be The Miz of NXT, elevating the second title. Cole won in character, but everybody looked tremendous. Loved this match.

Adam Cole wins the NXT North American Championship.

Ember Moon defends the NXT Women’s Championship versus Shayna Baszler

Okay, first of all, my favourite band Halestorm opened for Ember and it was awesome, such a rocking tune and great voice from Lzzy Hale. I found that a lot more interesting than Ronda Rousey being in the audience. If only Shayna wasn’t involved…I get that some people may like her, but I’ve found her generic and boring, a flat track bully. To be fair, her knee strikes were making ME feel sore, and it was something a little different, expanding her arsenal. Moon still comes across as the desperate champ struggling with the bully, including a dropkick to force Shayna into the ring steps. I have to admit, seeing Ember turn Shayna’s own elbow stamp onto Shayna was so gratifying.

Seeing Shayna trying to pop her shoulder back into place against the ring post was actually impressive, it feels like they are trying to create sympathy for Shayna, who has been a despicable bully so far. Ember’s finisher onto the outside was excellent, a great moment. Ember’s powerbomb on Shayna was even more impressive, I’ll admit, despite having no interest in this match, these two put in some great work to draw me in. And then, Shayna choked out Ember to win the title. I can’t say I’m surprised, and the match was better than I expected, but I do think it’s a mistake to give her the title so soon. I’m also curious about their decision to push Ronda as the babyface, only for her to be friends with despicable heel Shayna, lack of consistency.

Shayna Baszler wins the NXT Women’s Championship.

Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic Final: The Undisputed Era (Adam Cole & Kyle O’Reilly) defend the NXT Tag Team Championship against The Authors Of Pain (Akam and Rezar with Paul Ellering) versus Pete Dunne & Roderick Strong

The Authors Of Pain have gone on strength to strength, improving every match, whilst Strong is consistent and tough, respected by the audience, Dunne is a tough nasty bastard, and The Undisputed Era are heat magnets…this match is such a great choice. The Authors Of Pain instantly come in and destroy the opposition, powerbombing Cole straight through the announce table. O’Reilly simultaneously holding an AOP & Strong in submissions was a great image and makes it believable for him to have to wrestle alone.

O’Reilly being German Suplexed, jumping up screaming, then falling out of the ring, was my favourite moment of the night so far. Dunne and O’Reilly are two hard hitters, and seeing them smash mouth each other was great. Dunne snapping an AOP’s fingers to avoid a move is one of those little character moments that add to a match, very in character. As the match continues, I’m starting to feel that Cole may stir from injury in time to steal the win?

Strong using AOP’s strength and speed against them, including into the steel steps, and then WHAT THE FUCK?! Roderick Strong turned on Pete Dunne and helped The Undisputed Era retain? What a twist, O’Reilly’s reactions are awesome. I remember Strong supposedly being a great heel on the Indie scene, I am legitimately shocked at this development, but it definitely makes things interesting. I assume until Fish heals, Strong and O’Reilly will defend the Tag Team titles?

The Undisputed Era win the Dusty Rhodes Classic and retain the NXT Tag Team titles.

Andrade ‘Cien’ Almas defends the NXT Championship versus Aleister Black.

Almas has already been so impressive as NXT Champion, really raising his game for the title. Black is awesome all round, and comes flying out of the blocks. A tremendous moment where Almas flipped out of a sunset powerbomb off the top rope, only to miss the knees, only to lead into a backsault off the top rope and another Moonsault onto Black, great flow to the match. Almas surprisingly matched Black with some great strikes, until Black kneed his face out of place. Almas has scouted Black tremendously, catching him out every time Black goes to his arsenal. And the few times Black did on top, Zelina spiked Black twice with hurricaranas, playing the ref like a fiddle. Third time should surely lead to Zelina getting Black Massed by Black,

When Black did hit the Black Mass, Zelina saved Almas, she does such an amazing job as a heel manager, saving Almas four times already! Several close shaves, including a tremendous Hammerlock DDT from Almas to Black that I thought would end it. But this leads into the perfect finish, as Zelina tried interfering again, Almas catching her, and turning into Black Mass!

Almas may have only had a brief title reign, but it was very impressive, a 5 Star Classic and a great victory, but Black was the right choice, he’d been on track for the title since he debuted, and he offers a different style to some of the previous Champions. Black has earned this victory, but Almas can take pride in his reign, and I cannot wait to see who Black faces first…maybe a returning Drew McIntyre?

Aleister Black wins the NXT Championship.

Unsanctioned Match: Tommaso Ciampia fights Johnny Gargano A story years in the making, two former friends and brothers, now hated rivals. Johnny Gargano placed his career on the line for the NXT Championship, and lost because of Ciampia. Now, in an unsanctioned match, one where you can only win by pinfall or submission, Johnny Wrestling gets the opportunity for revenge. If he wins, he is reinstated to NXT. If he loses...he’s gone. This won’t be a five star classic, it’ll be a fight.

The atmosphere is engulfing. The punches and kicks that started the match lead into Ciampia getting more vicious, slams against the guardrail, and threatening with an unprotected floor. Johnnny Wrestling, the nice guy, throwing Ciampia into the announce team, really helped sell how consumed by anger and hatred he was. They would tease with one act of violence (suplex on the unprotected floor, suplex on the table) and then subvert it with something just as violent (suplex OFF the announce table onto the mat), sprinkling little Chekhov Guns to come into play later. Seeing the top of the announce table used to be suplexed through was something I hadn’t seen before, these little unique moments really add to the match.

There was one uncomfortable bump where it looked like Gargano landed on his neck after he was Irish-whipped into the corner, flipping upside down and landing on his head. A great touch was when Johnny got to the ropes when Gargano had a submission on him, only for the ref to tell him “No rope breaks”, i loved that! Really adds to the authenticity of the unsanctioned fight. So far, the only element I disagree with is that to me, an Unsanctioned match works better if the wrestlers are in street clothes, but I digress.

So far, the weapons being used really tie back to the history of their rivalry, the announce table from when Ciampia first betrayed Gargano, then the crutches from the crowd tying into Ciampia’s injury and multiple attacks with the crutches. The unprotected mat came back in a vicious way, Johnny going for a slingshot DDT attempt, reversed into Ciampia’s finisher attempt, only for Johnny to slither out and powerbomb Ciampia onto the floor - I admit, I let out an involuntary noise at the sound of Tommaso’s back landing on the floor.

The tired tug of war over the crutch really amplified the war these two are going through, and the cathartic strikes on Ciampia by Gargano, who refused to let go of the crutch even when thrown out, leading to a sickening crack on the head. It was only after that and a slingshot DDT, that I think the first pinfall attempt was made, twenty plus minutes into the match, a great detail for such a volatile fight. The reverses keep on happening again and again, showing how well these two know each other, Johnny even willing to pull on Tommaso’s beard.

Gargano locked in his submission hold, and the rope breaks came into play again, almost reaching ironic glory, and then the roll back into the middle of the ring, ala Benoit/Triple-H at Wrestlemania XX, seemed poised for the ending, only for Tommaso to dig at Gargano’s eyes. The desperation of Tommaso was then intensified by using his wrist rope to try and strangle his opponent.such a brilliantly layered story. A low blow, crutch to the back, then powerbomb backbreaker had me convinced it was over, but Johnny Wrestling kicked out again. I have no idea who will win at this rate.

Johnny using Tommaso’s kneepad to drag himself toward Ciampia was such an iconic image, leading into the lawn dart into the unprotected turnbuckle, then two vicious low superkicks, the second eliciting another unexpected noise from me. I know I said this would be a fight, not a five star classic, but these two are pushing close. Ciampia did another powerbomb backbreaker onto his knees for a massive near fall, and the knee brace has taken damage, these two are going all out. And now the final callback, the removal of Ciampia’s kneepad, ala the Cruiserweight Classic, only for Johnny to smash the brace into Ciampia’s knee!

A brief moment with a callback to the sit down in the ring together, lead to an amazing STF on the knee with the knee brace pulling back on Ciampia’s neck, that looked diabolically painful! And Ciampia tapped, Gargano gets reinstated, Johnny Wrestling has done it! He’s beaten Ciampia, vanquished his demon, and he’s reinstated to NXT! What a brilliant match, such layers and story telling, reversals, hard hits, big moments, character moments, emotional and unforgiving, a rollercoaster ride, but the hero has defeated the psycho.

Johnny Gargano defeats Tommas Ciampia

Yet again, NXT Takeover does an excellent job, great matches, fantastic stories, and even my personal weakest match (the NXT Women’s Championship) is exactly that, a personal indifference, but still a solid match. In fact, I probably couldn’t call any of these a weak match. What a brilliant PPV, NXT just keeps getting better and better and better.

[ninja-go-to-therapy]

Day 1: Past

@ninjago-angst-week 

Reminiscing about the past leads to painful discoveries.

Trigger Warnings: mention of death

This takes place between seasons 2 and 3

1434 words

Zane stared down at his memory switch, his fingers ghosting over it. He would never flip it, of course, but he couldn’t help but think about the two times it had been flipped. The first time by his father, turning Zane into nothing more than a blank slate.

The second time by Zane himself.

He remembered the feeling that had come with the memories that had flooded his mind all at once. It was overwhelming and happy and sad and too much and too little all at the same time. He’d almost wanted to vomit.

He didn’t even know if it was possible for him to vomit, but the feeling had been there all the same.

At the time, he’d been happy to rediscover the life he had once lived, if not shocked. Overwhelmed. But now… now he frequently found himself almost… upset about it.

His father had forced him to forget years of his life, and for what? To spare him the grief? He hadn’t even asked him. He had just… done it.

Zane had never wanted to forget. He had wanted to do so many things, he had wanted to remember his father forever, he had wanted and wanted and wanted. 

His father hadn’t cared what he had wanted.

His father had only cared about himself.

No, that was unfair. His father had been dying, he hadn’t been in his right mind. In almost every other memory Zane had of him, his father had been good to him.

But there were times. Fuzzy spots in his memory banks that Zane didn’t like one bit. He hated to think of his father badly, especially now that he was well and truly dead, but… he hadn’t treated Zane well. Not always.

It was a startlingly painful realization to come to.

And the fact that he was a robot, and he just… hadn’t known? It was his own body! How could his father do that to him?

He’d come to terms with it, by now. Lloyd had defeated the Overlord, Zane’s father had died, and life was moving on. Soon, he and his brothers would be teaching young children at a school. He was content. Really, he was.

So why did he feel so… angry?

Yes, he realized, he was angry. He was angry at his father, despite the fact that he was dead. Did that make him a bad person? To hold a grudge against a ghost wouldn’t get him anywhere.

But he didn’t care. It wouldn’t have gotten him anywhere when his father was alive, either. It would never get him anywhere. That only made him angrier.

He didn’t care that he was a robot. He cared that it had taken him so many years to know.

He slid to the floor, suddenly unable to catch his breath.

He needed to clear his head. He needed to… he needed to get out for a bit.

He left a note on the kitchen counter, hastily scribbled in pen. And then he left.

---

Zane didn't quite know what to expect when he docked at the lighthouse. His previous visit had been very short, after all.

He opened the door, expecting to find months worth of dust. He was surprised, to say the least, to find that this was not true. Instead, the area, while it was far from perfect condition, almost looked like it had been in use.

On his guard, now, Zane continued inside. For the sake of whoever had invaded his father's previous home, they better not have still been here.

Almost immediately, he heard a creek from up the stairs. He froze, listening for any other sounds. For a moment, he was almost starting to think he’d imagined it.

And then something clanged.

Zane bolted up the stairs, distantly heating frantic footsteps coming from above.

“Stop!” he yelled, rounding a corner on the staircase.

Whoever it was paid him no attention, they just kept going.

Zane burst into the top room, ready for a fight. Nobody was there.

“Show yourself!” He demanded. “What are you doing in my father’s lighthouse?”

From in the closet, he heard a dull thud.

Before he could get any closer, the door very slowly creaked open.

“Did you say your father?” asked a small, timid voice.

Zane approached, but froze when he saw what almost looked like a mirror image of himself. Only this one was rustier, smaller-looking, and his arm was on the floor beside him.

“Who... who are you?” Zane asked.

“I am Zane, built to protect those who cannot protect themselves. But, father called me Echo.”

His father had built another nindroid. Zane had a brother. And his father had never mentioned him.

“Are you Zane?” Echo asked, unsteadily getting to his feet. Zane nodded numbly. “Oh! Father talked about you all the time! I’m sorry for running before. Father always said I shouldn’t show myself to… visitors.” Echo frowned for a moment, deep in thought. But then he brightened. “Have you brought him with you?”

Their father had died without even telling him of his brother’s existence. Why had he not brought Echo when they had found him initially? He could have rotted here! Probably would have, if Zane hadn’t shown up.

“He has… passed, recently,” Zane said, his heart plummeting even further at the absolutely shattered look on his brother’s face.

Echo must have been waiting every day since their father had left the lighthouse. He must have waited, hoped, truly thought that his father would return. Zane didn’t know how his brother hadn’t lost his mind with all that waiting.

He couldn’t think of that, though. They had too much to talk about.

---

“It’s okay,” Zane said, “they’ll love you.”

The two had talked while packing up the lighthouse, and then the whole way back, too. This time, Zane had personally ensured that nobody was left behind.

“You’re sure?” Echo asked, fidgeting nervously.

Tai-D beeped encouragingly.

Echo gave a small smile. “Okay… okay. If you’re certain.”

“Trust me,” Zane said, giving Echo’s hand a small squeeze. “I am. Wait right here, I will bring you in momentarily.” With that, he slipped through the door.

Echo waited nervously, bouncing on the balls of his feet. Honestly, he was just grateful that all of his limbs were staying attached. Usually by now, he would have at least lost a foot.

Tai-D beeped at him again.

“You think so?” Echo asked, his smile widening when Tai-D beeped again. “Thank you! I’m sure they’ll love you, too.”

The door opened back up, and Zane waved him in with an encouraging smile. Echo took a breath, steeled himself, and entered.

His brother’s friends — the ninja — gasped.

“He looks so much like you!” the one in blue breathed. “Hi! I’m Jay!” he exclaimed, thrusting out his hand excitedly for Echo to shake.

“I am Echo,” he said, shaking Jay’s hand and smiling shyly at all the attention now on him.

The others went around introducing themselves. It was easy to remember some of the names, like Cole. He was the master of earth, so the association made it simple. Lloyd was easy, too, because he liked that it had two Ls.

They were all very friendly, and just as Zane had described them to be. Echo had expected to feel more overwhelmed, but the ninja were so welcoming that, even in the few minutes he’d been here, he felt accepted. He felt happy.

He liked that. He liked feeling happy.

---

Zane was happier than anything that his journey had led him to discovering his brother. But now he just… he just had so many more questions. His father would have mentioned Echo if he’d thought him to be important. Hell, he would have brought him along in the first place when they’d rescued him! So did that mean… his father just didn’t care?

Echo looked just like Zane, even technically shared his name. Was Echo meant to be a replacement? The thought almost sickened him. Had their father ever cared about either of them? Or were they just his little robot projects?

Zane sat down, putting his head in his hands. He was so confused. He wished their father was still alive, if only so he could demand answers.

But Echo… he didn’t want Echo to ever feel like that. Like he wasn’t worth something, like he wasn’t his own person. Zane would keep his brother safe. He wouldn’t let his past define him.

If that meant letting him believe that their father had been a good man? Well, there were worse lies to tell.