#but fucking Jeremy Irons as Brom

[gifsofhubris-a]

[modern-inheritance]

Heyy! Do you have any ideas for the cast of Eragon's new series?? Btw I loveee your posts

Hey Anon! Sorry it took me so long to answer this, but I wanted to give you a better answer...and I have failed. Thank you for the love though!

I don't know many actors/actresses by name. And none that I know of (besides Jeremy Irons) would fit any of the characters. But I CAN give you a ramble on what I'd like to see!

Eragon: Get those high cheekboned, cleft chinned, twink lookin' pretty boys out of here. Eragon in book one is not pretty. He is not headshot worthy. He is a 15 year old farm boy, doing physical labor, rarely bathing, hunting in the wild, and not caring about his appearance beyond the average. He's got thick, dark eyebrows. Dark hair. Apart from that, we have little to no description of how Eragon looks, beyond the mention in Brisingr that his hair curls at his temples slightly. But he is not pretty.

I want an average, slightly rugged, farm boy teenager. Not some model.

Brom: Jeremy. Fucking. Irons.

Arya: Not white and not a redhead. Elves are played as asian based. I don't want a skinny armed woman either, Arya's noticeably muscled in the books. Black hair, green eyes if possible. No wimps. Must be able to do the stunts or at least look like she can.

Honestly though? If she weren't older (I haven't seen a recent picture of her for a long time so I'm not sure about it), I'd tap Michelle Rodriguez. I love that woman. She's got the tough looks, attitude, and abilities needed to give Arya the presence she needs. But I'm looking through MIC tinted glasses. For canon Arya, we still need someone with a presence, a woman who puts of a 'don't fuck with me' vibe but can also sometimes dip her head in respect to politics (I said sometimes, but I'm gonna get shit for this I know it), quiet but sharp, and looks and acts like she can hold her own. If they're going to be more centered toward an adult audience (which apparently they are!), let's not sexualize her. But the history of torture, PTSD, etc can def be delved into and someone who can portray that respectfully would be fantastic.

Murtagh: Again, get rid of those pretty boys. Yes, Murtagh grew up with a more pampered life, but just...I don't want these model types. It's an issue when I've seen every single fan cast putting these models on there and come on. This is a medieval fantasy thing. Paolini at least tries to show some more realistic aspects of life and war. Models are not included.

Someone that can show both Murtagh's darker side AND his overarching vulnerability and pain. Murtagh is a hurt individual that keeps having everything taken from him or used to hurt him. He's complicated, especially in the later books. We need someone who can show that.

Nasuada: Please keep her natural hair. I've got a friend who read the books with me who was so happy to see a black woman with her natural hair in a fantasy book because she never had seen someone with hair just like hers in fantasy before. We need someone who can slump down in private, the weight of an entire war and country on her shoulders, but draw herself up and show willpower, regality, dignity. Someone who can use subtlety when doing the politics bits.

Angela: Something that I and others I've talked to about Angela always forget is that Angela looks no older than Nasuada, who is about 18 at the time of the books. Wild energy. Wild, curly hair. Not afraid to hold a live frog/toad for a scene.

Galbatorix: For the love of whatever the hell is holy, not John Malcovich. I get that we didn't know what he looked like at the time, but what the hell was that?!

Durza: Scrawny lean ass pale dude and can we move away from the scary fingernails and yellow teeth bit? The pointy teeth thing, fine, that's canon, prosthetic teeth are a thing. Otherwise I just want someone who just oozes lithe, cocky, oily, psycopath. Bared tooth, smirking, twisted grin type.

Uuuuuuh....who else? Roran can't be a model either, and he's more beefy than Eragon even in the first book. Someone who can grow a damn fine beard.

I'm probably forgetting a ton of mains but I am currently very hungry and my roomie is making me lunch so I must go stare at her like an unfed dog. Feel free to reblog with questions or send another ask for particulars, but again I won't have specific actors/actresses. If you know an actor/actress that fits any of my descriptions/wants then please mention them in a reblog or DM or ask! I'd love to see!

[shadeslayer]

The eragon movie HAUNTS me because Jeremy Irons was such a great choice for brom and I loved the saphira growing scene because it looked cool but beyond that it confounds me to this day.

I KNOWWW... FR HE WAS... HE IS BROM. it makes me laugh so much as well bc i try to think of like my ideal eragon fancast and its like a bunch of totally different people and then itd just be like, a screenshot of jeremy irons in the movie for real. he is Theee brom of all time

it was such an amazing confusing mess of a movie.... the thing was it was so bad but we still owned it in a box set with like a holographic flip over cover of saphira For Collectors Sake because my older brother was who got me into the series

the frustrating thing really is that the saphira growing sequence was cool and all the rigging they did on saphiras model was cool but it was like. The Opposite of what she shouldve looked like. like, shes on the cover of the book guys. also she looks like the most classical Dragon dragon ever. why did we decide to do a whole feathers bird thing on dragons just special for this movie where the dragon specifically in the drawings from the author that are on the covers of the books does not look like that. also it makes like so many scenes not make sense imo. jksndfjksnd . like theres a lot of talking about the webbing of her wings and how it can be/is damaged

also that arya casting was like. wild???? because it hits that same thing of saphiras feathers where its like. shes meant to be some arwen-looking classical lf shit but we decided to do some sort of 90s/early 00s narnia white witch woman in some sort of strange amalgamation of leather meant to resemble i guess buckskin plains indian clothes??? also why did you make her look like durza when you knew her introduction and her character in the first book is like super consistently in scenes with durza. we already had one redhead in there why did you make another redhead who is inexplicably paired a lot with the first one. its only going to make things confusing

what a movie. also the pc game kicks ass . now this is a fucking eragon video game

[mjrtaurus]

What are the worst movies you've seen?

Eragon

but only after reading the book series.

Fuck that movie.

Everything about that movie but Jeremy Irons as Brom can kiss the void.

[happygomadhatter]

Oh thank GOD they fucked up the movie so bad (I still love it I do love Objectively Bad Book Movies) so I’m very excited about this. I desperately want Jeremy Irons back as Brom tho despite knowing that’s next to impossible, he was PERFECT 😂

Haha i feel ya, it's very much in the same genre as the PJ movies where they're trash but still have a weird place in your heart! But yeh i am STOKED for this 😍😍

[ignite-the-stars]

So after re-reading the entire Inheritance Cycle, I decided to torture myself and watch the Eragon Movie for the 1st time. 

My thoughts are below.

Okay, I’m doing it. I’m watching the Eragon Movie. Goddammit. I’m going to hate myself for this, aren’t I? Ah well, here we go.

·         Okay, the narration isn’t bad. Good explanation.

·         Da fuk? That is Arya? NOOOO. Did you read the fucking description of her in the book? Ok, so the egg was just stolen that’s different.

·         Why is he blonde with blue eyes? Jesus Christ, did no one read the book?

·         I’m going to be saying this a lot, aren’t I?

·         I don’t like the narration anymore. But it’s Jeremy Irons so

·         Oh hey that’s Robert Carlyle. Creepy Dark Magician is a good aesthetic for him.

·         Why doesn’t she have pointy ears?

·         Okay so expected a little more from Carvahall. I thought there’d be some better log houses. Like Their clothes are advance but their houses are super early medieval

·         Sloan? Eww. I always pictured him to be at least a little intelligent looking.

·         I do like bitter sassy Brom though

·         Roran & Eragon play fighting like wut?

·         Okay leaving to hide from recruiting soldiers is new.

·         Aw Garrow. He ugly but nice.

·         Okay baby Saphira is adorable

·         IT’S A DRAGON DUMBASS

·         Why does everyone wake up? It makes 0 sense. WHY? WHY? Would you tell him it hatched? Damn it Blonde!Arya.

·         Okay what is this cave throne thing that Galbatorix is just hanging out in? What does he do all day?

·         Didn’t we get this story at the beginning Brom? Why have the narration at the beginning then?

·         Okay, there’s like no transition from dark gloomy Brom to happy prancing in the field of flowers Eragon.

·         WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT????? NO NO NO NO NO! THAT’S NOT HOW DRAGON GROW YOU FUCK OF A MOVIE! LIKE A MONTAGE OR SOME SHIT WOULD’VE BEEN BETTER.

·         PAUSING IT BECAUSE I NEED A DRINK

·         Saphira’s voice isn’t dragon-y enough. Ugh Good Lord movie

·         WUT why are you doing this in Brom’s house. Didn’t Garrow teach you some fucking manners?!

·         I am with Brom. I’d be pissed off at this whiny brat Blonde!Eragon too!

·         “I know you’re story is true!” I mean it wasn’t that long ago.

·         That sword is dumb, it looks like a normal sword that they fingerpainted.

·         Oh wow they killed Sloan. He won’t be important for book II

·         That’s a Ra’zac?

·         What is this? There’s no way they could’ve gotten there that fast.

·         Okay so Garrow’s already dead. That was quick.

·         I mean this isn’t dramatic at all

·         Slow down this is going too fast.

·         HOW THE HELL DID BROM GET HERE THIS FAST?

·         WHAT THE HELL BROM???? You can’t just burn shit like this? RUDE

·         Conclusion. Everyone needs to learn manners.

·         Also why does Brom just have an extra horse?

·         And now it's raining. Good luck with that funeral pyre.

·         RIDE! And you just go??? Why this makes no sense. Pls establish something

·         Well, he’s got the condescending part of Brom down.

·         Also ERAGON IS 15 FUCK YOU MOVIE

·         Good Lord time to get another drink. This is gonna be a rough night.

·         BROM’s outfit is killing it.

·         “I think he’s a friend” JESUS blonde!Eragon he just burnt your farm to the ground.

·         “Ah-rah-gen” I thought it was pronounced “Air-ah-GONE”

·         Are these supposed to be Urgals? I think I need another- no Laura wait. I have a feeling more dumb shit is coming

·         “We’ve trained with swords” YOU’RE FULL OF SHIT BLONDE!ERAGON

·         Okay, we’re skipping a lot here. SLOW DOWN!

·         Also why are we going to the Varden and not after the Ra’zac.

·         Your lack of motives and wanting to get revenge is killing me Blonde!Eragon

·         This is Daret???

·         The country is much smaller than it is in the book.

·         Please tell me this glitter whore isn’t Angela

·         FUCK

·         WHY YOU TALKING IN the THIRD PERSON

·         Blond!Angela, why are you like this?

·         I don’t think this is the prophecy.

·         “Did she tell you about HIM?” Nice Brom

·         Honestly Brom calling everyone out on their shit is the only good part of this movie.

·         WHAT WAS THAT???? That’s not how the force works.

·         “You’re a Wizard Eragon”

·         “What’s the word for tree? Branch?” Way to pick lame ass words to be happy about Eragon.

·         Dramatic Entrance Saphira!

·         Where da fuck did this saddle come fr- oh Brom made it okay.

·         Okay, you almost fell off died Eragon. Stop laughing.

·         What happened to the other horse?

·         Oh it’s back ok aaa ay

·         But he’s be galloping everywhere

·         Is this where Brom dies? No, he’s the only smart one in this movie?

·         That’s not how magic works!!!

·         So the Ra’zac are dead now?

·         “Better to ask forgiveness than permission” -LoL got him but you’re still annoying blonde!eragon

·         Awww Brommy boy. “Where’s your dragon?” MANNERS BLONDE!ERAGON!

·         How can the shade just teleport???

·         LoL Flashbacks to Empire Strikes back “You are in command now Admiral Piett.”

·         Why are you telling him you’re a princess? Come on. Why are you in a fancy dress. GODDAMMIT BLONDE!ARYA

·         BLONDE!ERAGON YOU ARE SO DUMB!

·         When am I getting Murtagh? I need someone else to call Blonde!Eragon out on his bullshit

·         Oh god please don’t tell me that greasy emo looking kid is Murtagh?

·         That’s not how your dragon eyes work.

·         Empire Stikes Back Flashback.

·         God I love Robert Carlyle

·         1. HOW THE HELL DID BROM GET HERE SO FUCKING QUICKLY LIKE GEOGRAPHY DOESN’T WORK THAT WAY

·         2. WTF????

·         3. BROM DID YOU SUDDENLY BECOME DUMB TOO?

·         Dammit it’s Murtagh. At least he isn’t blonde

·         Where’d you get the cape from Arya?

·         This hopeful music needs to stop, my fav is dying

·         “Yet” “That’s the spirit” Damn it Brom. I love you right now.

·         Oh so he’s gonna ride Saphira now. This is dumb again.

·         Where is my boi Murtagh?

·         Also Arya has a new outfit again??? Where are you keeping these?

·         DAMMIT BLONDE!ARYA where is your badass warrior self from the books?

·         Shade is doing shady shit. What the hell is this??

·         That wasn’t very specific. Arya

·         “My family was slaughtered” YOU LIAR MURTAGH

·         Why you so happy to go to the Varden

·         Wow the Varden are really easy to get to

·         What’s with the overly fancy helmets Vardeners

·         Well at least Ahjihad isn’t blonde

·         Aren’t there supposed to be dwarves somewhere?

·         Welp Murtagh is sized and gone

·         Shade isn’t looking so good

·         NASUADA! DAMN GIRL YOUR OUTFIT IS ON POINT

·         What are these freaky mask and hats and shit

·         So no drawves???

·         Or is the only sorta short guy played by that guy from Outlander supposed to be one

·         Stop flirting Blonde!Eragon

·         Blonde!Eragon isn’t your leader  Blonde!Arya

·         This armor is over the top and impractical

·         Good lord, I hate how they do the sword thing

·         “INTO THE SKY TO WIN OR DIE” Nice rhyme farmboy

·         Mah Boi Murtagh is free again

·         And Saphira can suddenly breathe fire I shouldn’t be surprised

·         “TIME TO RETURN A FAVOR” Wow Eragon saving people life is something that decent people do

·         What the fuck is this shady dragon shit

·         Eragon supposed to be dying, not Saphira Book version of all this is way better

·         Okay why didn’t this work for Brom then, since him dying was only like 2.15 hours ago

·         All the fade to black return of the king style

·         WOW Murtagh why to freak him out that was cruel

·         And Blonde!Arya has a new outfit

·         Stop making incompetent fool the leader of things

·         This movie is only 1.5 hours long. Needs at least another .5 hours to make sense

·         “Only yesterday you were a farm boy.” LIKE ACTUALLY YESTERDAY IN THE CASE OF THIS MOVIE

·       �� God Damn it I hate this movie. Like it wouldn’t be terrible if there wasn’t a book

·         BUT THE BOOK WAS JUST SO MUCH BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 Conclusion: To Really do the story justice it needs a nice miniseries. With Older Jeremy Irons reprising his role as Brom. I’d be down for that. Give be billions of dollars so I can buy the rights start a fantastic production that this series deserves.

[deprofundisclamoadte]

jeremy irons is a great actor with a large number of accomplishments, but whenever i see his name my first fucking thought is always “oh that’s brom from the eragon movie” and i’ll never be able to rid myself of that

[blackrevolvers]

When you inexplicably start thinking “yknow despite how boring the Eragon movie was, I’ll always love how it just decided to make Brom hot,” only to discover that hot!Brom was Jeremy fucking Irons and wtf apparently this is just a pattern in my life