#but fuck i loooooove sobbing with a girl on top of me

[pretty-kitten-paw]

Hard kink sex is:

"You fucking slut I can't believe you're getting off to this much abuse"

"I-i don't, it's gross, stop ple- oh, can I cry?"

"Of course darling!"

"OK thankyo- noooo stop waaa" pathetic snivelling ensues

[iridescentwinters]

a thrilling proposal

– summary: if there had to be only one word to describe alexander hardenberg, it would be extra. and he lived up to this reputation through his proposal to the love of his life.

– prompt: After this mess I need something strong like winterberg proposal !!!

↳ also available on ao3

anyone who knew mia knew that she absolutely adored roller coasters.

she enjoyed the rush of adrenaline she received every time she was stationed in one of the cars, and it was chugging its way up to the peak of the track.

everyone also knew that alex was completely terrified of roller coasters. or any amusement park ride that involved high speed, really.

so when he suggested that they go on the biggest roller coaster at the amusement park they were visiting for date night, mia was shocked beyond belief. she wasn’t even sure why he made the proposal in the first place, because he was visibly shaking, clutching onto something in his pocket. mia squeezed his arm firmly. “are you alright?” she said, concern laced to her tone. “we don’t need to go on this, you know.” she then proceeded to furrow her eyebrows. “did sam say something? because if he did i will-”

“no!” alex jumped in. “no, nothing about him. i just need to get on this.” nervous was clear in his voice.

“alex, you’re shaking–”

“it’s cold.”

“but–”

“next!”

before mia could complete her sentence, they were already in front of the line, and the ticket-master held out his palm for their tickets. alex’s smile didn’t quite reach his eyes as he placed the tickets in the man’s hands, before grabbing ahold of mia’s and guiding her towards the platform, where the roller coaster awaited.

as they took their seats right in front of the first car, he looked back at the blonde, who still looked weary. “i’ll be fine, trust me.” he said, before squeezing her hand. “you’ll protect me, won’t you?” he joked. in all honesty, he was more nervous about what he was about to do on the ride rather than the ride itself.

mia smiled. “of course.” she cooed, pinching his cheek. “i can’t wait to see you cutting off my blood circulation on the top.” she was referring to the photo that would be taken at the top of the track.

hopefully the camera captures more than that, he nervously replied in his mind. he gave her a grin as a response.

a few moments later, their safety locks were checked on and they were good to go. that was when the ride jitters seeped in alex. oh sweet baby jesus, alex thought with a big gulp, as he heard the motors of the roller coaster run. the things i am willing to do to be special… as soon as the roller coaster starts moving, his hand automatically finds mia’s. she chuckled, and squeezed it back tight. “just close your eyes and it’ll be over in a flash.” she whispered, as they made their way up to the track. she closed her own. “here. i’ll do it with you.”

thank you! alex thought, and using his free hand, he slipped out the tiny dark purple velvet box. his hand shook and he decided to slip out his other hand from mia’s grip. mia didn’t seem to mind, though. her eyes were still closed.

they were nearing to the top.

alex’s heart beated out of his chest.

within seconds, they were stationed right at the top.

now or never. he took a deep breath, before looking at mia. “mia! i need to ask you something.”

mia’s eyes opened. she looked back at him. “wha–” she stopped, right when alex opened the box. the most gorgeous diamond ring was gleaming under the moonlight. “wait…” shock took over her entire face. it was as though she was a deer caught in headlights. she wasn’t the only surprised one though. numerous gasps were heard from behind them.

“mia amalie winter,” her name tumbled out of alex’s mouth as quickly as possible, knowing that the roller coaster was about to drop in any second, “iloveyousodamnmuch will you marry m-EEEEEEEEEE!”

the ride began before he could finish popping the question.

but that didn’t stop mia from answering.

“YEEEEESSS….YOU…...BIG…...SO…...EXTRAAAAAA…...I LOOOOOOVE YOUUUUUUU!”

once the ride was over and the roller coaster returned to base, everyone was clapping for them, as mia threw her hands around alex and kissed the life out of him. despite being out of oxygen from the ride, he felt as though he was on cloud nine. the woman of his dreams agreed to marry him.

mia let tears slide down her cheeks. “i can’t believe you did this for me!” she sobbed. alex grinned. “glad to see that i’m not the one crying.” he joked, causing the woman to punch his arm lightly. once they arrived to the ride’s booth, their photo and their friends were awaiting them.

the gang cheered for them, and the girls spread their arms out, ready to hug mia tightly. all of them congratulated the two of them. “no way! you guys knew?!” mia asked, amazed. they all nodded. sam smirked, holding a camera. mia was confused as to why he was, considering the proposal happened on the ride, but didn’t question it.

“mia, come look at the photo.” alex beckoned her over. she couldn’t help but burst into giggles after looking at it. “my face!” she pointed. “and yours too!” both were completely shocked and terrified.

alex smiled. “we’ll have two copies of this, please.” he said to the woman behind the booth. he looked back at mia, and got down on one knee. passerbys stopped, as mia’s heart stopped for the exact same reason for the second time that night.

“i didn’t exactly say everything i needed to up there, for obvious reasons.” he grinned, before clearing his throat. “the moment i saw you, something started regenerating in my heart. at first, i thought it was the hormones talking, but the moment you spoke to me, were telling me my reality, i knew it was the one thing i feared to feel again. love.” he took a deep breath, before continuing. “i never knew i could feel that for anyone other than sophie, and after her death, i vowed to let anyone in ever again. and for a long time, i thought it would be impossible to. but you proved me wrong, mia. you taught me how to love. how to spread it. you showed me that the world isn’t as fucked up as it seems. because though fear spreads, love does too.”

mia let a tear fall to the ground, as alex opened the velvet box once more. “i love you so damn much, mia amalie winter. and it would be an honour for me to call you mia hardenberg.” he paused briefly, before continuing. “or winter-hardenberg. you choose. you’re the boss, of course.”

the bystanders laughed alongside mia, who dried her tears with her sleeve. “and it’d be an honour for me to marry you, alexander-axel hardenberg.” she grinned. the whole crowd cheered for the couple, as they embraced each other once more.

a thrilling proposal it was, alex thought giddily, as he kissed the top of his fiancée’s head.

[pinupgalore-lanadelrey]

Lust For Life Review

*I put this as “personal” and more private because I honestly don’t want to be very public about negative opinions and such and I feel bad that I don’t love the album as much as all of her other albums and felt in a lot of areas that it was lacking - despite having some songs I adore. These are just my personal opinions and I don’t want to be attacked for them! I’ve made an album review for the last 2 albums when they came out and wanted to do one for this one too but was hesitant - which is why it took so long.

13 Beaches (9/10)  - Rhyming beaches & peaches is corny but who cares when Lana sounds so beautiful? I love the orchestral intro with the monologue.. it’s just haunting. “Can I let go and let your memory dance in the ballroom of my mind?” *goosebumps* Now that is easily one of the standout lyrics from the album. When she starts belting out the 2nd half of the chorus she RIPS YOUR HEART OUT. The second verse is so beautiful.. the instrumental (aside from the electronic chorus) is so haunting. I get Honeymoon album vibes.

Love (8/10) - A nice and uplifting departure from sadder songs. Not a whole lot goes on with the instrumental aside from a few random noises. The song is beautiful despite a couple corny lyrics “look at you kids, you know you’re the coolest.” But having such a gorgeous, dreamy, and artistic video makes me appreciate the song a lot more (adding a point for the video alone). “mmmm oh oh mmm oh oh oh oh don’t worry baby” literally makes the song for me. I LOVE that part so much and how ambient it is before it goes into the chorus again. 

When The World Was At War We Just Kept Dancing (7/10) - When I first heard the snippet of this song I thought it was going to be one of my favorites. I love the acoustic verses so much. So beautiful and nostalgic. I thought the “fucking youth” “fucking truth’ wasn’t necessary. I don’t like how electronic it gets when she sings the song’s title. I do enjoy the message of the song “boys don’t make too much noise and don’t try to be funny” telling them not to harass women. “Is this the end of America? No it’s only the beginning. If we hold onto hope we’ll have a happy ending” <3  

Heroin (9.5/10) - This song is really something else. Totally unexpected.. and not totally fitting with this album but in the best way. So dreamy & reminiscent of Barrie James O’Neill’s music. “I’m flying to the moon again”... I can only imagine how amazing this song would sound when high. The way it echoes is so haunting and gorgeous. The 2nd verse gives me UV vibes.. sort of like Sad Girl. I love the guitar added during “like the metal that you hear.” I understand that some fans don’t like the “It’s HOT HOT” part.. it sort of took me off guard at first too but in the right mindset it makes sense. The instrumental & lyrics lend to this sort of manic state of mind & also sort of retro psychedelic. 

Cherry (6/10) - I know at least half of the fandom disagrees with me and that this is their fave. I like the guitar and her voice.. but the “yuh” "hey” take away from the verse.. I’d like it a lot better if it wasn’t a synthetic bass.. maybe a bass chello instead? I like how dark the first verse sounds. I think “bitch” and “fuck” are so funny/ corny and take away from the song a little bit (to me.) I feel like this song could easily be a 9 to me if she took out the bitch/fuck, changed the trap beats to a drum, and added SOMETHING to the instrumental.. Imagine more of a UV (guitar) or BTD (orchestra) sound. I feel like the hip hop element just doesn’t fit this song? It’s just my personal opinion. I feel like it has so much potential and has a gorgeous song underneath it all.   

Beautiful People, Beautiful Problems (8/10) - This song even starts haunting and deep. The fact that Lana did a song with Stevie is so iconic. “My heart is soft, my past is rough” GOOSEBUMPS. The harmonies & piano backing.. simply beautiful. 

White Mustang (6/10) - I feel like White Mustang has / had so much potential. It starts out with Ride / AFFA / Starrey Eyed / Black Beauty vibes.. I like the melody and the way she sings it but the instrumental is so lackluster. :/ It just feels like it’s missing something.. and then the beats sort of take over/ drown the entire song... Like Cherry I also feel like this song could have easily been a 9 or even a 10 for me if this had real strings instead of the snyth & beats it could easily be Ride 2.0 but it fell short  :/

Change (8/10) - I feel like we were overdue for a stripped piano song from Lana, like Old Money & Bel Air. I don’t think the song needs anything added to it. I think her voice sounds perfect with piano. I think the message is featured and the song feels intimate and personal. I’m glad her voice isn’t drowned out by beats or anything. I think it’s simply beautiful & I love the “I can taste it turning sour” part.

Lust For Life (6/10) - I’m not big on the talking parts but I do like the doowop vibes. I love the “we’re the masters of our fate..” lyrics & instrumental during that part.. but the chorus is super repetitive & the instrumental is extremely underwhelming to me. I do feel like it sounds like a pop The Weekend song for the majority of it. I do enjoy the instrumental for the 2nd verse & the doowop mixed with Abel’s voice. I think I’d be much more in love with this song if it wasn’t so electronic & repetitive. 

Tomorrow Never Came (10/10) - THIS SONG MAKES ME SO EMOTIONAL. I love the instrumental. Her voice sounds so beautiful with an acoustic guitar and then the surf noir guitar comes in and sounds HEAVENLY “Lay lady lay” iHAVE GOOSEBUMPS EVERY TIME. Everything about the instrumental is perfection. Acoustic guitar, bells, surf noir wah wah guitars.. Then Sean Lennon comes in and sounds so much like his father & like a Beatles song and I start CRYING. This song is as nostalgic as it gets. I knew the second I heard the snippet this would be my favorite. I get that some think it’s corny that she sings “now that I’m singin with Sean” but when you think about it, and listen to just how Beatles-like the instrumental is during that line.. it’s just so cool. Like a peice of the Beatles is really in that song.. and as a Beatles fan.. it is crazy!

Summer Bummer (6.5/10) - I did not want to like this song.. at all. I am not a fan of rap. I’m not a fan of the rap in this. I think the “what what what what what what what what what what what what yup what what what what” is extremely annoying and honestly.. terrible. But I like the piano and love Lana’s haunting and “menacing” backing vocals. It’s so catchy / repetitive I can’t help but turn it up and jam in the car. I also love the high pitch “high tops in the summer” and added beautiful sounding instrumental mixed in the with beat towards the end. But I feel like the production could have been a lot better as well.

God Bless America (7.5/10) - I LOVE how this song starts. This song just brings you to New York. I like the instrumental to this song, I just really wish the loud trap beats and gunshots didn’t overshadow it. I would have probably given it a 9 w/o them (and maybe 1 less chorus). I love that she wrote an album for the women in this country. It really shows how far she has come. The bride of this song is fucking gorgeous. Her vocal layers & mandolin(?) and “ohhhs” are heavenly. The last 90 seconds of the song adds so much more it it. It becomes epic and bringing back the spanish guitar and her voice <3

Groupie Love (6.5/10) - This song gives really strong Honeymoon album vibes. I love the guitar part & her voice “and every time I look up I know what you’re thinking of.” Plus I love the lush strings during “groupie loooooove” despite disliking the beat and the wub wub wub wub going into the 2nd verse. 

Get Free (10/10) - I did NOT expect this at all. This song is everything. Just everything. No trap beats, heavenly vocal layers, and Doowop vibes. Then she breaks out the surf noir vibes and I’m hearing serious Lana Del Rey aka Lizzy Grant vibes and I’M IN LOVE. This song is optimistic, upbeat, without lacking instrumentals, has a great lyrics/ message.. Every time this song comes on I crank it up and dance / sing along and have to play the song twice. The beach/ seagulls / ambiance at the end.. just the perfect PERFECT way to end the record. I want this song to get a video so bad. This song FREES ME. I thought Tomorrow Never Came was my favorite.. I think it has the best instrumental & is the most beautiful.. but Get Free is my favorite. 

In My Feelings (4/10) - I’m sorry.. but I cannot get into this song. I think it’s the worst one Lana’s ever released and the lyrics are super corny, the instrumental could have been on Miley’s Bangerz or Selena Gomez’s.. or Kesha’s old stuff.. or any other pop singer.. It’s easily the black sheep of the album. “I’m runnin on the treadmill” “sobbing in my cup of coffee” “I’m feeling all my fucking feelings” “I’m crying while I’m cumming.” As a 25 year old woman I find it so cringey... maybe 10 years ago I would have found it edgy and cool. “who’s tougher than this bitch, who’s free-er than me.” 

Coachella (6/10) - I wasn’t a fan of this song at first but compared to IMF it’s amazing. I have to admit I think it’d be a lot better as an acoustic song. The acapella version she sang on Instagram was gorgeous. I think the synthetic instrumental sounds fairly nice but I do not like the beat at all. Having a song named Coachella is corny enough.. but I could see how she could relate to Woodstock with Father John Misty playing.. his latest album is absolutely brilliant. I would have figured they would have left it off the album or at least added to the instrumental/ production before putting it on the album. I do really enjoy the bride though. “A stairway a stairway. I got a few things I wanna say, what’s it all for, will it be okay?” and her heavenly “oohs’ echoing in an out. 

*FYI* This is my own personal opinion.. 

I’m not an expert. If you’ve been following my blog for years you know UV is my favorite album. I’m into classic rock & indie music and instrumentals can make or break a song for me because I was raised by a musician who showed me some of the most amazing music out there. I don’t care for radio music or most simple music. Everyone is allowed to have different tastes.. I posted this on read more because I know there are people who love simple upbeat fun songs and are going to be pissed that I think IMF is a crappy song and that I’m not crazy about Cherry, Summer Bummer, White Mustang, Groupie Love or Coachella.

[niniadepapa]

Nini! Since we seem to have the same tastes in tv shows, i was wondering what are your favorite books???

uoHHHHHH BOIIIIII where do i even start?!?!?!?! take a seat my friend because this is gonna be a LONG ride…

the classics i’ve loved since forever:

the famous five series by enid blyton - i read them ALL and reread them dozens of times

the little prince by antoine de saint-exupéry. nothing else to say,

literary any play by federico garcía lorca, but ‘la casa de bernarda alba’ still makes me !!!!!! it’s so good jfc 

ella enchanted by gail carson levine like i’m sorry i know the movie has anne hathaway and hugh dancy but still i feel robbed of the wonderful perfect book i’ve reread 937562937456923 bazillion times. i deserve a proper ella enchanted movie/show, yall. 

 the last cato by matilde asensi. i legit made all my friends AND their moms read it when we were 17.

the perks of being a wallflower by stephen chobsky. it pretty much changed my life.

atonement by ian mcewan. wow. just wow. 

gone girl, by gillian flynn because we all need to read amy dunne’s cool girl speech 

it’s difficult to even type never let me go by kazuo ishiguro without shedding tears.

the perfume by patrick suskind traumatized me but also enchanted me?? idek man, it’s a very special book.

i read the entire the physician series by noah gordon when i was a teenager and i still love it sooooo much!!!!!!

peter pan by j.m. barrie bcs lbr everybody should learn that peter was a fucking asshole

the harry potter series by jk rowling. that abomination of a fanfic slash play that came out last summer obviously isn’t included here. 

the percy jackson and the heroes of the olympus series by rick riordan - my savage demigod son, i’ll always heart u

don’t judge me but the mortal instruments, the dark artifices, the infernal devices - all of the motherfucking shadowhunter books to ever be, i’ll read, no matter how much i hate cc. i hate her for the hold she has over me.

i did enjoy the hunger games back in the day lbr

stardust by neil gaiman ksjbdfakdfjalsdfjbaglsjdfblkas literary my most favorite i love it so much it hurts me

and now as of things i’ve read in the past years that i can rec w a hand over my heart staring into your eyes and claiming they’re Good Shit:

across the universe series by beth revis was pretty fun for sci-fi even tho there was a twist that i wasn’t very happy with

under the never sky by veronica rossi was actually very cool i really enjoyed it

i REALLY loved the shatter me series by tahereh mafi like oh my god a heroine that truly learns how to accept and love herself!!!!!! fuckbois get rekt!!!!! incredible character arcs!!!! i’m pumped for the next book tahereh announced lbr

the lynburn legacy series by sarah rees brennan was suuuuper fun because magic?? family drama??? actual woc main character?? bisexuals??? i was living while reading them tbh

vicious by v.e. schwab was really fun because it was nothing like i’d ever read before, i’m really looking forward to reading her other series 

i’ll only rec leigh bardugo’s six of crows duology because i refuse to acknowledge the fucking mess that was the grisha trilogy, jfc. six of crows, excluding some stuff, is super fun, has great characters, good ships, and teenagers that pull cool stunts to get $$$. incredible.

the fixer series by jennifer lynn barnes are !!!!!!!!!!!!! i wish she wrote more of them i would legit beg her and throw money in her face for more. teens swept off by washington/politics drama/conspiracies… my jam ladies and gents

the study series by maria snyder. are. so. good.

i’ve only read two of melina marchetta’s books and both of them broke me. i’m onto her.

big little lies by liane moriarty - if you haven’t watched the show, do it. if you haven’t read the book, do it.

i loooooved the first two books in the falconer series by elizabeth may and still have to read the third but i haven’t seen good reviews about it so i’m kind of… waiting a bit…

i’m not gonna talk much about sarah j maas here because even if there are things in her books that i really enjoy -specially some ships and the worldbuilding- the inherently whiteness, straightness and the unbelievably high number of times she writes the words ‘male’ and ‘female’ makes me want to punch her repeteadly in the face. 

simon vs the homo sapiens agenda by becky albertalli is so funny and heartwarming dkzfjbzdjfkblz

uprooted by naomi novik had lowkey w/w but also an incredible het ship that was dkjfbksdjfs also living evil woods and strange shit that was amazing

what we saw by aaron hartzler is very rough to read, especially considering it’s based on a real life case (Steubenville High School rape case) but holy shit do i think it’s important to read and know. 

in that same line i put one of my favorite books i read last year: the female of the species, by mindy mcginnis. that book broke me on so many levels, every time i think about it i burst into tears. it’s so raw and real and just… ugh. i swear it’s gonna stay with me until my last day, it’s /that/ kind of book.

i still haven’t forgiven my best friend for making me read the mistborn series by brandon sanderson. that’s al i’m gonna say about it.

cruel beauty by rosamund hodge is so unique and i just loooooove the characters so much because they do acknowledge their flaws and that they’re not perfect?? and just??? recognize that in each other??? which is a+++ in my book u do u. also super beautiful writing!

the anna and the french kiss series by stephenie perkins will always have a special place in my heart bcs they’re so fun and light-hearted and witty and i really love them 

AND NOW, TOP FIVE:

the daughter of smoke and bone series by laini taylor IS INCREDIBLE. WHY IS EVERYBODY SLEEPING ON THIS BOOKS. ANGELS AND MONSTERS. ANGELS ARE ACTUALLY BAD, MONSTERS ARE GOOD. ANGST. IT’S SO GOOD.

the raven cycle by maggie stiefvater, even if i still have hashtag problems w things in it (more girls. why aren’t there more girls. NOAH.) i just… i love my stupid kids so much. 

the wrath and the dawn by renee ahdieh is fucking INCREDIBLE it’s so good i get so mad bcs it’s legit unknown pls do urselves a favor and read this masterpiece it’s based on a 1001 nights and the main ship and characters are!!!! just!!!!! a++++!

the song of achilles by madeline miller is probably one of the books that i have most enjoyed and suffered with in my entire life. the true illyad i deserved. the most heartbreaking thing ever.

the winner’s trilogy by marie rutkoski is literary the best series i’ve read these past years and i’ll forever be in cee’s debt for making me read them. the most savage slytherins in love with the angstiest motherfucking relationship ever, a super clever look into colonialism and discrimination, the most beautifully haunting writing, IT’S JUST SO FUCKING GOOD I’LL NEVER READ ANYTHING AS GOOD AS TWT WHY AREN’T THERE 398465923846 FICS ABOUT IT JFC *sobs*

this got LONG lmao i’m sorry i get really excited talking about books in case u were wondering!!!!!!! i’m more than happy to talk about literary any of them, and welcome recs and will pretty much spew shit about anything i know ig u wanna holler @ me. i just really love books and i’ve been in an anxious-reading mode for the past three years so yEAH thanks for the ask anon it made me super happy!!!!!!