#but for me? I'm exhausted all the fucking time. i do one thing and i need to take a nap. it isn't a choice. i have to work myself up for

[crossdressingdeath]

You know what the most frustrating thing about DAV criticism is at the moment? It's that I do in fact have criticisms. Quite a few, actually. It's a Bioware game, of course I have criticisms. No one I've spoken to or whose posts I've seen thinks it's perfect or above criticism. But the thing is, I—and I imagine a lot of other firmly positive blogs—know that if I share any of those criticisms, if I make posts discussing them and talk about the game's flaws, I will immediately be inundated by people using those complaints to insist that the whole game is garbage and the writing is bad and Bioware's a terrible studio who can't make good games and DAI (of all fucking games) was so much better and blah blah blah blah. I know that because it's happened every goddamn time I've made a less-than-positive post about DAV. And I don't have the energy to deal with that! The endless stream of bad faith criticism wears me down and having to constantly stop to defend a game I like when I'm trying to discuss its flaws because if I don't (and frankly half the time even if I do) people will use my posts to claim the whole game is garbage is exhausting, and fandom is supposed to be fun. So I can't discuss DAV's flaws on tumblr if I want to avoid that, and it is infuriating. I see people bitching about toxic positivity and people refusing to acknowledge the game's flaws, and I really want those people to take a second to consider: do the game's fans ignore its flaws and refuse to accept that anything about it is bad? Or have you created an environment that is so toxic that no one who likes the game wants to risk getting your attention by mentioning what's bad about it and they respond more aggressively than is warranted to even genuine critique in an attempt to ward you off? Because there will always be assholes who claim that genuine problems are Fine, Actually, Stop Being Such A Baby... but if people can't address the game's flaws in public without immediately getting dragged into five different arguments about how it is in fact ultimately a really solid game, they're not going to do it no matter how much they recognise those flaws.

[solvicrafts]

You know, I've seen a few people online making shitty comments about the fires in SoCal right now, and about all the rich peoples' homes burning, and I'm disgusted and just so exhausted over how crass, mean-spirited, and downright nasty so many people are the moment they think they're in the clear to feel good about someone else being hurt, just as long as it's, you know, one of THOSE people and not them.

Meanwhile, I'm over here thinking about when I used to work at the hippie woo store a few years back, and I was waiting outside for the bus after a night shift, and one of our regular customers (a pretty wealthy woman who I'm pretty sure LIVES in one of the areas that's affected by the fires right now) drove past me, then pulled around and gave me a ride home.

And then I remembered the time she waited until nearly closing time one night hoping to confront another regular customer who had been horrendously rude to me.

Hot take: I have had coworkers that were full on MAGA, anti-vaxxers, anti-choice, etc. and as much as I absolutely could not stand those people, as angry as I was that I would get punished for reporting their inappropriate behavior, as resentful as I was about the times I was told to apologize to my racist old coworker for offending her by pointing out that she can't be going on insane rants while ringing up our fucking customers, at the end of the day, if I ran across that same coworker bleeding out in the road, I would run out to help her.

I fundamentally disagreed with her on every single thing that came out of her mouth. I consider her one of the most vapid, selfish, and ignorant people I've ever met in my life. And I would still help her if I came across her and she needed it, not because I particularly want to do something nice for her, but because it's the right thing to do.

I would not take pleasure out of watching her suffer, or lose her home. I would not enjoy watching my most hated customers go through that. I sure as hell don't enjoy seeing complete strangers suffer and lose THEIR homes. I could sit here and whine about how at least THEY have homes to lose, or I could do the bare minimum thing that any decent person can do, and just not be a huge asshole.

I'm sure a good at least a few of those people who lost their homes were probably some of my worst customers. I know the area (well, a little bit, anyway), and I know we had shoppers that would come out to our store from there. And quite a few of them were absolutely insufferable. And still, I hope that they are safe, and that their homes are okay.

[nemisuki]

Sudden Shower

Break up AU | You didn’t realize entering a new life would affect your relationship this drastically. Maybe some things are meant to stay in the past to live in the future. 

᧔o᧓ || katsuki bakugo x f!reader, no manga spoilers, pure angst, no fluff, sad but kinda open ending, aged up to 19-20, right person wrong time trope, high school sweethearts no more, time to cry, read at ur own will, 1.1k word count 

"You can't keep pushing me away when all I've been doing is trying to help you Katsuki."

The sound of water droplets echo around the couple - pitter and pattering of the rain trickle on the concrete pathway under their feet.

Small vibrations course through his hand as the storm grows more intense, both in his heart and nature taking its course, heavy downpour hitting the surface of their shared umbrella.

Her gaze roams his facial features from the side, the moonlight illuminating his red eyes, making them look more intense if even possible.

"I didn't ask for your fucking help. I'm not a kid who needs to hold your hand every step of the way."

He refuses to meet her eyes - staring straight ahead as they walk towards the agency he interns at. His voice was intense yet not to the point of yelling.

Arguments aren't uncommon these days. Growing more frequent these past couple of weeks.

The stress of newfound adulthood seeping into the cracks of their relationship.

"Yes and I understand that but you're not acknowledging my concerns! It's not like I think you're not capable, I'm worried about you. What part of that don't you get-"

He halts in his stride as she expresses her troubles - causing her to stop as well.

They both stand in uncomfortable silence, the only thing being heard is the rain around them and sway of leaves from the trees of the park.

A shortcut to the agency they found months ago.

"Don't you think I know that? That's not the point! Breathing down my neck every time we meet and constantly babying me is fucking annoying!"

"Because I care about you!"

"You never were like this before we graduated! And don't give me that bullshit of hero work being dangerous. I know what I signed up for and you knew since we started dating!"

"Did you ever think for one second from my perspective?! I barely see you these days and when I do, you're so exhausted that I have to pick up your pieces!"

"I never asked you too, I'm fucking fine!"

"You never tell me anything! Just talk to me! Why can't you admit to yourself that you need a break?!"

"I don't exactly have the pleasure to have free time Y/N. I can't just stop going on patrols because my girlfriend fucking misses me!"

The storm only seems to grow more intense as the pitch of their voices turn sharp - courtesy of their fluctuating emotions.

A chill goes up her spine as he finally turns to face her, those red orbs boring into her own.

Whether it's from the cold weather or the frustrated expression on his face, she doesn't know.

At his words she's unaware of what to say in response, thinking about the tension between them as of lately.

Her gaze wanders away from his face and down to the puddle forming beneath them.

The reflections of them two tauntingly staring back at her. A version of themselves they have yet to explore.

This isn't high school drama anymore - the new world they entered was filled with responsibilities and unfamiliar experiences.

They have yet to open the gates of their unknown future as adults but looks like they'll be choosing which path to take from here on out.

And they both knew there was only one right option.

He seems to understand what's going through her mind and grimaces at the thought.

Even if he knew it was inevitable.

The decision was like a ticking time bomb just waiting to explode after weeks of arguments, conflicts and foul exchanges.

She couldn’t constantly be distracted from her work because of the uncontrollable anxiety towards him. And he couldn’t give it his all if he had to balance his busy schedule between his work and personal relationships.

They both had problems to work on but separately. 

"....katsuki-"

"yeah i know... i know."

Before he cowers back on this decision, he gently places the umbrella in her hand, giving her one final look.

As if all his frustrations vanished and were replaced with a neutral reaction. Maybe because he’s trying to be strong for the both of them, knowing he has to be the one to end things.

That’s something that she always admired, his strength.

She’s about to apologize for not being the one to speak up but he shakes his head. Already knowing what she’s gonna say and gently patting her head.

Her heart thumping away at the small gesture.

A distant look casts over their eyes - though they both know once they look away, it will all come crashing down.

They didn't say much after that, unaware of how long they stood in the same position communicating with their stare alone.

He was the first one to move.

Turning around and beginning to walk away from her, droplets starting to absorb into the jacket he wore today.

One she bought him long ago.

"Text me when you get home at least dummy."

The serene sound of his voice made her unable to stay silent any longer, she bit her cheek as tears began trickling down her face, attempting to hold back the sobs urging to escape her mouth.

"Katsuki!" she yells out, once he's a good distance away.

Her heart is clenching so much that it hurts, her throat closing up as if her body registers that this is really it.

He hesitates but ultimately turns around, looking at her from afar.

This distance between them is so vast - both physically and emotionally.

When you love someone, set them free right? Right.

It was as if all their shared memories came flowing back to her.

Perhaps they were meant to meet when they're still young and find each other again when they're older.

Or maybe this truly is the end - only time would tell.

She musters up the best smile she could at the moment and stares at him. Many thoughts going through her mind but only one stands out.

Slowly she opens her mouth to speak, wanting nothing more then to run back into his arms and say "I love you" but-

"Thank you."

Before he could say anything back, she turns on her heels and spins around, walking away from him before she breaks down. 

Finally allowing her emotions to surface, bursting into tears as her figure goes out of sight.

She knew if he said anything more, she'd go running back to him. But you shouldn't stay on a chapter for too long, no one should stay stuck in the past after all.

Unable to see the blonde, he stands there motionless, letting the rain devour him up completely.

Streaks of water dripping down his cheeks - unaware of the difference between possible tears and the downpour coming from the clouds.

"I love you too Y/N."

Oh how much the boy hates rain. 

✦ ⎯⎯⋆ ˚｡⋆ ୨ masterlist || taglist || intro || socials ୧⋆ ˚｡⋆⎯⎯ ✦

a/n ||| im sorry i haven't posted in 2 whole weeks! honestly i zone out during december but im back ૮꒰ྀི > . < ꒱ྀིა and with some angst oooo la la. idk if u guys would like more sad fics like this on my page but do lmk in the comments! sometimes u just gotta let people go to improve on urself and thats okay :) tags ||| @leleyro ໒꒰ྀི ´๑  ̫๑`  ꒱ྀིა

[ilov3b00kss0much]

Featuring my favorite idiots ever

@justalunaticfangirl I'm sorry this took so long I had to go shower and then my mom called me to help her with chores and stuff. Also I'm running on like 5 hours of sleep bear with me.

This is the dumbest thing I’ve ever written it was so fun

Will also be posted on AO3 later!

“Polites! I swear to all the Gods I will make your life a living hell if you don’t come here right now! I am going to send you to the underworld VERY early!” Odysseus yelled, chasing after a laughing Polites. In his hand was a large map, the path home. Along with a bunch of calculations for the ships, and a drawing of Penelope made by a talented artist back in Ithaca. 

“No way, Ody! You haven’t slept since we left Troy!” Polites said, flashing a grin back at Odysseus.

“Eurylochus! Help me here!” Odysseus said, passing him as he ducked under a rope. Eurylochus looked over, then smirked at Odysseus. 

“No can do, Captain. I’m with Polites on this. Penelope won’t be too happy if we return her husband looking like a haggard beggar.”

“But- but- ah! I need to plot our route carefully. Our rations are already low, and I don’t want any delays. I haven’t seen my wife in ten years, for all the God’s sake!”

“Yeah, and that’s why you need to rest! You really want her first look at you to be exhausted and half asleep? You want to greet her with actual energy, right. Or do you think she doesn’t deserve that?” Polites teased. Odysseus glared at him, but he smirked back.

“Fine! But three hours. That’s it.”

         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Eurylochus. I have a question,” Polites said, looking up at his (much) taller friend.

“Yeah, Polites?” 

“Can I try to lift your sword?”

Eurylochus gaped at him. 

“What.”

“It looks so heavy. I’m really curious.”

“Polites this is not a good idea.”

“Please?”

“No.”

“Pleeeease???”

“I-Fine.” Euylochus lifted the sword out of the scabbard on his back and handed it to Polites, keeping one hand on the blade.

“Eurylochus. Let me hold it fully.”

“No.”

“Please.”

“Polites no.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Yesss.”

“Ugh. Fine. Only for a moment. Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Eurylochus dropped his hand and Polites immediately stumbled, sword tottering in his hands. 

“Eury…help,” Polites gasped, trying desperately to keep the sword from impaling anyone.

Eury quickly grabbed it again, lifting out of Polites’s grasp.

“And this is why I didn���t want you to take it.”

“HOW DO YOU DO THAT?”

“Practice.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“We strike now,” Odysseus whispered to Eurylochus. Eurylochus nodded, hiding behind the large trunk at the corner of the room. He glanced at the still form of Polites, barely stirring. It was time. He nodded at Odysseus, who gave him a thumbs-up. 

Eurylochus crawled towards Polites, doing his best to be silent. The wooden floor creaked beneath him, and he winced. However, Polites didn’t wake, only stirring a bit. Eurylochus got to the very edge of the hammock, then groped around in the darkness. There. The glasses. He gave Odysseus a thumbs-up and they both retreated.

—

“ODY! EURY! WHERE THE FUCK ARE MY GLASSES?” Polites yelled, throwing the cabin door open. Odysseus glanced at Eurylochus, trying very hard to hold back his laughter. 

“I don’t know, Polites,” he said, shrugging. “Have you checked the floor?”

“YES. THREE TIMES. ODYSSEUS PLEASE I CAN’T SEE ANYTHING.”

Odysseus swallowed his laughter yet again, smiling innocently.

“I don’t know, I swear.”

“ODYSSEUS OF ITHACA, I WILL TURN THE ENTIRE SHIP OVER GIVE ME MY FUCKING GLASSES.”

“I don’t know, really!” 

“EURY? PLEASE I’M GOING INSANE.”

Odysseus could no longer hold back his laughter, and doubled over, laughing so hard he gasped for air. Eurylochus glanced at him and started laughing too, trying not to embarrass himself.

“I KNEW IT! GIVE ME BACK MY GLASSES.” 

“Here, here, take them. This is payback.”

“FOR WHAT?”

“When you stole my plans.”

“THAT WAS FOR YOUR OWN GOOD.”

“Whatever. All debts settled?”

“Fine. Never do that again.”

“Deal.”

give me epic the musical prompts I need to write something

[eternalergo]

.

[pa-pa-plasma]

i don't think i'll ever get over how people treat kids that aren't good in school as worthless no matter what. "oh it can't be that bad" my guy idk how to tell you this but the last time i went to a normal high school the principal called me into his office to brag about how he failed me in all of my classes before the semester was even finished & i should quit while i'm ahead cuz i'm too stupid ("officially" diagnosed as such by a school counselor & a psychiatrist!!) to succeed. & this is considered normal

[running-in-the-dark]

my niece stayed with us last night. it was pretty fun this time, probably because I was feeling better (if I'm already in pain or exhausted, I can't handle it). after we dropped her off, we talked to my mother for a little bit, and then drove to my in-laws. we were there for a few hours and because the guys were busy outside, i ended up talking to my mother-in-law for most of that time. it was... kind of good? I don't know. she actually showed some real emotions, just a little bit, but hey that's more than ever before! I even gave her a weird little shoulder squeeze/side hug, it was so weird.

anyway, I almost fell asleep in the car on the way home because I was so tired, and actually did fall asleep immediately on the couch.

[tchotchkez]

😮‍💨

[sorry for the hardcore tag rants, y'all]

[eastofedean]

8i've been thinking about the last asks i got today. and i think it's better for me to take a step back from this account. i know the anon didn't mean anything by it, but i still feel like i am being a negative presence on here and weirding people out with who i am is nothing i want. so, i am not deleting or anything. i am just gonna be less present with sharing personal things or leaving tags. I'll probably be more active on my second account where i don't have that many followers :)

[im2tired4usernames]

Every single time I defend someone shitty who has done nothing but be a cunt to me because they did 1 (ONE ) decent thing THEY ALWAYS TURN AROUND AND DO SOMETHING SO MUCH WORSE TO ME

[dazais-guardian-angel]

went to my first con in 4 years on Friday to meet Kaiji Tang and got a Dazai autograph + video recording of him reading to me. He was the sweetest person (as I knew he would be) and interacting with him was lovely, but also at the same time oh boy it sure was an extremely stressful, ugly wake-up call of what it feels like to live in a world now where everyone around you has blissfully moved on from covid and can enjoy things normally and happily, while you'll forever be trapped in a hellscape of perpetual fear 🫠🫠🫠

[omarfor-orchestra]

.

[pilots-and-protons]

Quick blanket-statement for anyone who is thinking of sending me messages:

I am fully aware and conscious that there are problems with every Star Trek.

I understand the ongoing issues with racism, sexism, and a number of outdated ideologies. TOS-VOY (which are what I watch, other than the movies) are all products of their time and incredibly dated in many ways, and it’s wonderful that people want to point out the flaws and issues and discuss the varying ways that Star Trek could have and should have done better even for its time.

But let me make this clear: Star Trek (TOS, TNG, DS9, and VOY) are my comfort shows. I am autistic and they’ve been my special interest for a long time now, and I cannot stress enough what that means to me. I watch them to be happy and to find a sanctuary away from the constant stressors of every day life, especially since I struggle with anxiety and depression.

I don’t want to talk about everything wrong with them. I just want to focus on the best aspects of Star Trek - the stories, the characters, the relationships. I want to talk about fascinating science-fiction concepts and the beautiful way Star Trek tried to bring important social issues to the table. I want to talk about found families who love each other, including all the ways they are strange and unique and different.

I know that there are problems and I am not ignoring them entirely - I just need a space to focus on the good things.

So please for the love of god, I don’t need people to question whether or not I’m aware of the racism or the sexism, I don’t need people coming after me because they don’t think I should enjoy specific characters, and I don’t need to be hounded about every little issue that ever existed because a bunch of (mostly) Cisgendered White Men were writing stories before we even reached the 21st century.

[olessan]

I love the fact that I can work as hard as I can manage with a broken tooth and a dying tooth (one on each side, I've been chewing on the cavity for a year) and I still cannot save even $10 towards getting dental treatment (2 impacted wisdom teeth, + tooth broken off under the gum, + bad cavity) because I barely make enough to cover my food and board and the insane energy bill

[running-in-the-dark]

a super fun thing that my brain is really good at is hearing a random fact and remembering it forever. but only if it's bad :)

[folkinsomnia]

guess who's back in their compassion fatigue for library patrons era!!!