#but fatphobes and fatphobic companies and societal values

[yearning-butch]

Anyway. I’ve hit this point in my life where I don’t hate my body, and I’m so unbelievably happy about it. What I Do hate is the way my body is perceived and treated—but that anger is no longer directed inward. I’m fat and I’m fucking cute as hell. I’m learning how to dress in a way that only helps my confidence. I don’t let assholes make me feel like shit about myself.

But like I also feel like being a lesbian and seeing lesbian posts here on Tumblr has been HUGE for that? Like special shout-out to the Tumblr lesbians and posting about fat butch appreciation. Shout-out to my fellow fat butches out here looking handsome as hell and providing endless amounts of inspiration and gender envy. Y’all fucking slay

[oh-katsuki]

Tw fatphobia

i'm sending my question lol hi! i'm nervous sending this lol IDK why

so i'm chubby, i haven't always been chubby but i am now, and i like being chubby, i'm really happy with where i am now with my body, but i grew up surrounded by asian family and friends living in an east asian country, i'm not going to delve deep into the details, but it was kind of just ingrained in my mind when i was young that fat = bad as everyone in society there is fatphobic (and it's not overlooked, bc it's just for lack of a better word, normal) especially the boys and it's just a greatly esteemed standard of country-wide beauty. so that, including the laws set in place to prevent people from becoming plus size and young adults calling the body positivity movement "embarrassing", it was just ingrained in my brain without choice, but that changed when i left and moved countries, i let myself gain weight for myself because i liked it! and i'm literally obsessed with myself now lol

anyways, when i visit asia, i guess my old thoughts come back kind of, so my question/biggest obstacle as a big person is that i still have trouble being able to belive i can be fat while still being healthy, both my parents and uncle is both doctors, and i just want to communicate that people CAN be fat and healthy, i just don't know how, i'm chubby and perfectly healthy, but i know there are people bigger than me and i just don't know how to let not only them, but other friends know that it can be possible

sorry if this was a odd question, you're the only person i feel kind of safe asking. have a great day cal ❤ (also can i become an emoji anon?)

hi!! thanks for sending it <3, i'm really happy that you felt safe enough to ask me, that makes me really glad. I'm gonna put my answer below a cut to avoid clogging the dash!

edit: AHH yes of course you can become an emoji anon!! pick one, dearest <3

so, i'd like to start out by saying that i'm sorry that you had to deal with that type of environment surrounding body types. that's really hard. i'd also like to say that im really proud of you and happy for you that you're happy with yourself. that is so so important and you deserve that happiness.

now, internalized fatphobia is a really hard thing to deal with because it's something that you have to do mostly on your own, and that can be really hard when you're dealing with social influences that tell you otherwise. it's just about remembering that no matter what your weight / body looks like, you are deserving of love.

but i also want to say that you do not have to be healthy in order to be happy with yourself as a fat person. health is not the pinnacle of value, nor does it have any effect on that. the idea that "fat = unhealthy" is actually a campaign that was created by diet companies in the 1960s in order to push their products. there are actually a lot of studies that talk about this push and the idea of "low-fat diets".

this isn't to say that there aren't complications, but as far as weight goes, it's important to me that you (and everyone) know that you have value regardless of health and regardless of what your body looks like. since that campaign by diet companies (and especially with the rise of the body positivity movement), "health" has become a leading argument to excuse fatphobia. it pushes the narrative that health = value, which is not true at all.

health is important, but this idea that someone's health determines the level of respect they get as a fat person is really harmful, especially within the disabled community because there are people for whom "health" by societal standards is unattainable. it pushes the narrative that it's what we should be striving for, when the reality is that we should be open, loving, and accepting of everyone, regardless of weight, body, or health circumstances.

it's actually incredibly harmful to excuse fatphobia / weight under the premise of health for this exact reason. it excludes so many people from a movement meant for everyone and sets a standard for "acceptable fatness" in society which is bullshit in it's entirety.

now, i'm not sure how to answer your question to the fullest, but i can tell you that your value is not reliant on your health or your weight. it is an intrinsic part of you and no matter what you look like or experience, that will never go away. focus on loving yourself regardless of that fact. focus on healing and on repairing that mental trauma you suffered from where you grew up, but don't base your worth on health, base your worth on you. It's a part of you, regardless of anything, you have value to yourself and the people around you that cannot be taken away.