#but at the same time I don't know what I'll do when I'm there | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

rafayelxsylusho · 2 days ago

Note

Not sure if you do requests! (I tried looking but I couldn't find anything so sorry in advance if you don't.)

I was wondering if you'd ever be willing to do a sylusxyouxrafayel piece! I think Rafayel and Sylus both have that delicious possessiveness to them that it would almost be like a competition but I'd imagine it make someone go a little crazy from how opposite of each other they appear.

Thanks!

Hi I do accept requests, it might take a bit of time for me to get to them but I try 😊.

This is how I picture it, I hope you like it!!

TW: Filthy smut

You opened your eyes, blinking against the dim light filtering through the curtains of an unfamiliar bedroom. A throbbing headache pulsed behind your temples as fragmented memories of the night before flashed through your mind, loud music, clinking glasses, the taste of alcohol on your tongue. And then, nothing.

You sat up abruptly, your heart pounding as you tried to make sense of the raised voices. The room spun slightly but you ignored the disorientation, focusing instead on the heated exchange between Sylus and Rafayel.

"...in danger if YOU were supposed to be taking care of her, not running around the city like some reckless fool!" Sylus shouted, his usually calm demeanor shattered.

Rafayel scoffed, his tone dripping with sarcasm and annoyance. "Oh, coming from the man who's been stalking her every move for years? At least I have the decency to be present when I say I'll protect her.

You blinked rapidly, rubbing your eyes and shaking your head as if to dispel the illusion. But no, Sylus and Rafayel remained, glaring at each other intensely, seemingly oblivious to your sudden awakening.

"Am I...am I dreaming?" you muttered under your breath, struggling to reconcile the fact that these two, who had never met each other to your knowledge, were now standing in the same room together and arguing about you.

You swung your legs over the side of the bed, feeling the cool hardwood floor beneath your feet as you stumbled up on slightly unsteady legs. Your head throbbed and your mouth felt like cotton, remnants of the night before still lingering.

You felt strong arms grasp you before your knees could give out, pulling your limp body against a firm chest. The scent of cologne and something uniquely Sylus filled your nostrils as he held you close, his grip possessive and protective.

"Get your hands off of her," Sylus growled, his voice a low rumble in his chest that you could feel as much as hear. There was a warning in his tone, a clear message that he considered you his territory to defend. Rafayel, not one to back down from a challenge, tightened his own hold on you, his fingers splaying across your back as he pulled you more firmly against him. "I'm not letting go of her, not until I know she's okay," he retorted, his chin set stubbornly.

Their argument continued to escalate, voices rising as they stood there holding you between them. The last thing you registered before everything faded to black again was the feeling of their hands on your body, their chests pressed aginst your back and front, hearts beating with a matching intensity. Then, nothing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You slowly regained consciousness again as you blinked open your heavy lids. Sylus and Rafayel were still there, their argument now a low, heated murmur but no less intense.

"...leave, Sylus," Rafayel was saying, his voice tight with barely contained anger

You tried to speak, your throat dry and scratchy. "W-what's going on...?" you croaked out, struggling to make sense of the situation. "Why are you both here? How do you even know each other?" Your words came out slurred and weak, your body still not fully under your control. You looked between the two men, seeing the way they eyed each other like rivals, the tension crackling in the air between them. The reality of your situation began to sink in, this was no dream. Somehow, some way, Sylus and Rafayel were both here, in the same room, arguing over you. And you were right in the middle of it. The realization sent a shiver down your spine, even as a fresh wave of dizziness threatened to pull you under again.

You looked around the unfamiliar room, your gaze landing back on Sylus and Rafayel. They stood frozen, eyes locked on you, expressions intense.

"Where am I?" you asked again, your voice slightly stronger this time. You needed answers, needed to understand how this bizarre situation had come to pass.

Rafayel was the first to speak, his brow furrowed in concern. "You're in a safe place, cutie. Don't worry, I've got you."

Sylus scoffed, "Not thanks to you" he retorted, his lips curling into a sneer.

Before they could launch into another argument, you interrupted, desperate for clarity. "Do you two...know each other?" you asked, looking between them in disbelief. "How is this even possible?"

Rafayel's expression darkened, his jaw clenching as he glared at Sylus. "Yes, unfortunately we've known each other for years, Sylus here has been...keeping tabs on you.

Sylus's jaw clenched, his eyes narrowing as he glared at Rafayel. "Fine," he bit out through gritted teeth. "Yes, it was mephisto that has been watching over you. Not that Rafayel here has been doing a very good job of it," he added with a scathing edge to his voice.

You stared at them both in disbelief, your mind reeling from their revelation. Without thinking, you pushed yourself up to standing, pointing an accusatory finger at each of them in turn.

"What makes either of you think I need your protection?" you demanded, your voice stronger now, tinged with anger and confusion. "I was having less trouble before I even met the both of you!" You couldn't believe the gall they had, arguing over you like some prize to be won when you had been managing just fine on your own until now. The realization that they had been secretly watching you left you feeling violated and furious. How dare they interfere without your knowledge or consent? Your heart raced as you waited for their response, determined to get to the bottom of this mess.

Rafayel stepped closer, his eyes softening as he circled around you. There was a change in his demeanor, a intensity in his gaze that made you feel both unnerved and strangely breathless.

"Why do you think you were doing okay before, cutie?" he asked, his voice lowering to a smooth, persuasive tone. "Luck? Or perhaps..." He paused, his fingers brushing lightly along your arm as he continued to walk around you. "...it was because of the protection we have been secretly providing you, even if you didn't know it."

His eyes met yours, and in them you saw a flicker of something raw and possessive. "You really think you could have lasted this long without someone watching your back?Without us?" There was a hint of vulnerability in his words, but also a underlying current of arrogance.

Sylus scoffed, his voice dripping with disdain as he spoke. "Don't give yourself too much credit, Rafayel. The fact that she ended up in danger last night is on you. If you had been doing your job properly, she never would have been in that situation." His eyes flashed with accusation as he glared at Rafayel, his hands clenching into fists at his sides.

Rafayel still didn't spare Sylus a glance, his intense gaze remaining fixed on you. "Well, cutie here said she was already home and going to sleep," he argued, his voice taking on a defensive edge. "I didn't know she was out partying with friends. I don't have some creepy mechanical crow stalking her every move, now do I?" There was a hint of bitterness in his tone, a jab at Sylus's invasive methods of protection.

You took a step back from both of them, your arms crossed tightly across your chest as you glared at Sylus and Rafayel in turn. Your eyes flashed with anger and frustration, your voice rising as you spoke.

"I really don't owe either one of you any explanations," you declared firmly. "And I don't need your so called protection, so stop." You felt a surge of independence and defiance, unwilling to be bossed around or controlled by either of them anymore. "I can take care of myself, and I don't appreciate being spied on or having my life interfered with like this." Your words were sharp and decisive, leaving no room for argument.

Sylus let out a low, rumbling chuckle at your defiant words, his eyes glinting with a mix of amusement and dark appreciation. "Feisty little kitten, aren't you?" he murmured, " or maybe a little dragon, all fire and fury, even when you're cornered." He took a step closer to you, his tall frame seeming to loom over you, his presence commanding and dominant. "And I think you do owe us an explanation," Sylus continued, his gaze intensifying as he searched your face. "We've both invested too much in keeping you safe to just walk away now." He reached out, his fingers brushing along your jawline, tilting your chin up to force you to meet his eyes. His hand remained under your chin, his thumb brushing back and forth as he held your gaze. His eyes bored into yours, intense and unyielding. "You can't deny it, can you? You've been playing us both, keeping me at arm's length even as you flirted shamelessly with Rafayel." His lips curled into a smirk, his eyes flashing with a mix of amusement and something darker, more possessive.

"Don't think I haven't noticed," Sylus continued, his other hand coming up to rest on your hip, pulling you just a little bit closer. "Mephisto can see everything, little dragon. He can see the way you blush and smile at Rafayels clumsy attempts to win your favor."

He leaned in even closer, his breath ghosting over your lips, his voice lowering to whisper. "Tell me, were you planning to keep us both dangling forever? Or did you intend to choose one of us eventually?" His eyes searched yours, looking for answers, for any hint of what you truly wanted. The air between you was charged with tension, Sylus's proximity making it hard to think straight.

"I...I wasn't!" you stammered out, flustered by Sylus's proximity and the intensity of his gaze. "I'm not playing with either of you." Your cheeks flushed hotly at the accusation, your heart pounding in your chest.

Before you could gather your thoughts to say more, Sylus interrupted, his voice dripping with smug satisfaction

"Oh, I think you were," Sylus said, his voice still low and intense. "But perhaps Rafayel can enlighten us both." He tilted his head towards the other man, a smirk playing on his lips.

Rafayel stepped closer, crowding into your space on the other side. He inhaled deeply, his eyes fluttering shut for a moment before opening to pin you with a heated gaze. "I can smell your arousal, cutie," he murmured, his voice rough and low. "The same scent that clung to your skin when we went on our dates, when I held you close and whispered sweet nothings in your ear."

You swallowed hard, your mouth suddenly dry. "I...I don't know what you're talking about," you managed to say, but your voice lacked conviction. Your body trembled slightly as Rafayel's words echoed in your mind, the truth of them impossible to ignore. You were attracted to both of them in a way that both thrilled and terrified you, and they both knew it. The knowledge put you at a distinct disadvantage in this bizarre standoff.

Sylus leaned in, his lips brushing against your ear as he spoke in a low, intense murmur. "How do I put this in simple terms, kitten?" His voice was a dark, velvety rumble, sending shivers down your spine. "You've been flirting with both of us, spending time with us, and right now..." His hand slid from your hip to your lower back, pulling you flush against him. You could feel every hard inch of his body pressed against yours. "Instead of feeling unsafe or scared, you're feeling something else entirely, aren't you?" His other hand tilted your chin up, forcing you to meet his burning gaze. "You're feeling turned on. Aroused. Desired. And we both know it."

Rafayel's eyes flashed with a mix of jealousy and indignation as he glared at Sylus. "Maybe she doesn't want you, Sylus," he retorted, "Maybe y/n only wants me." There was a desperate, almost frantic edge to his words, a man clinging to a fading hope.

Sylus laughed, his eyes never leaving yours as he spoke to Rafayel. "If you had a mechanical crow watching over her every move, as I do, you would have seen the way she reacts to my touch." His hand slid lower on your back, his fingers splaying possessively over the curve of your rear. "You would have seen the way her breath hitches and her pulse races when I'm near. The way her eyes follow me when she thinks I'm not looking. So don't think so highly of yourself, Rafayel. She wants us both, whether she's willing to admit it or not."

His words sent a thrill of fear and excitement rushing through you. As much as you tried to deny it, you couldn't ignore the way your body responded to both of them. The way your heart raced and your skin prickled with goosebumps at their touch. You were caught between them, a pawn in their twisted game, but you couldn't bring yourself to pull away. Some dark, hidden part of you reveled in their attention, their desire, even as your logical mind screamed at you to run.

As you turned around, to put some much needed distance between you and Sylus, you found yourself crashing against Rafayel's firm chest instead. His hands instinctively came up to steady you, one hand splaying across your lower back while the other cupped your jaw gently.

Rafayel gazed down at you, his eyes dark with emotion as they roamed over your face. They lingered on your lips for a long moment before flicking back up to meet your gaze. "Do you really want to go, y/n?" he asked softly, his thumb brushing over your lower lip. There was a vulnerability in his eyes, a raw, aching need that made your heart clench. It was clear that he didn't want you to leave, that the thought of you walking away twisted something deep inside him. His grip on you tightened slightly, as if he were afraid you might disappear if he let go.

Behind you, Sylus let out a low, mocking laugh. "She's not going anywhere," he said confidently, his voice a dark rumble. "Are you, kitten?" His hand slid around your waist, pulling your back flush against his hard chest. You could feel every contour of his muscular body pressed against you, the heat of his skin seeping through the thin fabric of your clothes.

You were trapped between them, your heart pounding wildly as you looked up at Rafayel. His eyes searched yours, looking for any hint of indecision, any flicker of doubt. He saw the way your breath caught in your throat, the flush that crept up your neck to stain your cheeks. And he knew, as surely as Sylus did, that despite your words, you didn't really want to go. Not when you had both of them, so close, so eager, so hungry for you. The air between the three of you was charged with a dark, electric tension, the promise of something dangerous and thrilling hanging heavily in the space between your bodies.

Sylus leaned down, his lips brushing against your ear as he whispered, his voice a low, dark rumble. "You don't want this? Then we'll move. But if you stay..." His hand slid possessively to your hip, "If you stay, you're ours. Both of us, in every way imaginable." His other hand came up to tilt your chin, forcing you to meet his burning gaze over your shoulder.

Rafayel's eyes flashed with a mix of triumph and dark promise as he looked down at you "You heard him, cutie," he murmured, his voice low and seductive. "Stay with us, and we'll give you everything you've ever wanted. Everything you never knew you needed." His thumb brushed over your lower lip, tracing the soft curve of your mouth.

Behind you, Sylus nipped at your earlobe, his teeth grazing the sensitive skin. "We can give you the world. Power, pleasure, a love so intense it consumes you. You just have to say the word, and we're yours. Mind, body, and soul." His hand slid up from your hip to cup the swell of your breast, his thumb brushing over the peak of your nipple through the thin fabric of your shirt.

A soft gasp escaped your lips at the feeling of Sylus's fingers grazing over the sensitive peak of your breast. Your body arched instinctively into his touch, craving more even as your mind reeled with the weight of their words.

When you turned your head to look up at Rafayel, his eyes were clouded with a mix of desire and desperation. His eyelids were hooded, his gaze heavy lidded as he stared down at you with a hunger that made your heart race. The air between you was electric, crackling with a tension that demanded release.

Acting on a primal instinct, you closed the distance between you, pressing your lips against Rafayel's in a kiss. His eyes widened in surprise for a moment before fluttering shut, a low groan rumbling in his throat as he kissed you back with a fervor that stole your breath away.

His lips moved demandingly against yours, his tongue delving into your mouth to claim you, to taste you, to consume you. One hand fisted in your hair, holding you in place as he deepened the kiss, while the other hand slid down to grip your hip, pulling you flush against him.

Behind you, Sylus growled lowly, his fingers digging into the soft flesh of your breast as he watched Rafayel kiss you with a bruising intensity. "That's it, kitten," he purred darkly. "Give in to it. Give in to us."

Rafayel broke the kiss, his chest heaving as he stared down at you with a wild, almost manic look in his eyes. "Tell us you want this," he rasped, his voice rough with need. "Tell us you're ours, and we'll give you everything"

The kiss had only fueled the fire burning low in your belly, the ache between your thighs. You could feel the evidence of their desire pressed against you, hard and insistent and demanding. They were waiting for your answer, their bodies trembling with the effort of holding back, of giving you a chance to refuse.

You turned your head to the side, your lips finding Sylus's in a kiss that sent a jolt of electricity through your body. It was different from Rafayel's kiss, darker, more demanding, more intense. Sylus kissed you like he was starving for it, like he wanted to devour you whole and consume every last piece of you.

As your lips met Sylus's, you felt Rafayel's knee press firmly between your legs, sliding up to brush against your most sensitive area through the fabric of your clothes. The sudden contact against your aching, clothed sex made you gasp, your body jolting with a surge of pleasure that quickly turned into a drawn out moan.

The sound of your pleasure echoed between the three of you as the kiss with Sylus broke, your chest heaving and your skin flushed. Sylus's eyes flashed as he heard your moan, a grin spreading across his handsome face.

"Listen to that sweet sound, the way you moan for us, kitten. You can't deny it anymore." His hands slid down to grip your ass, squeezing the firm globes possessively as he pulled your hips back against his own. You could feel the thick, hard length of his arousal pressing your backside, leaving no doubt as to how much he wanted you.

“I bet I can get you off like this,” rafayel whispered, his voice teasing with an edge of promise. “Make you come without even putting my hands on you.”

He moved his leg, rocking it upward in a way that pressed perfectly against your clit. You whimpered loudly because, no doubt he could, but you didn’t want that.

“I want your hands on me,” you whispered. “Please"

Rafayel's eyes darkened with lust at your breathless plea, a smirk spreading across his face. "As you wish, cutie," he whispered "Tell me what you want, y/n , tell me how you want to feel my hands on you."

"Don't be shy, kitten," sylus said, his lips brushing the shell of your ear. "We can give you exactly what you need. All you have to do is ask."

One of Rafayel's hand slid slowly up your thigh under your skirt, his fingertips leaving a trail of fire in their wake. Your skin prickled and tingled with anticipation as his touch crept higher and higher, inching towards the aching, empty space between your legs.

He leaned in close, his lips brushing yours as he whispered, "Is this where you want my hands, cutie? Right here?" His fingers danced along the sensitive skin of your inner thigh, teasing and tormenting you.

You shook your head. “Higher.”

Rafayel looked at Sylus with a smirk, silently conveying a message between them. Sylus answered with a dark chuckle, his hand sliding up to the hem of your shirt.

"Of course, kitten," Sylus purred, his fingers slipping beneath the fabric to stroke the bare skin of your stomach. "We want to touch you everywhere. To feel every inch of this exquisite body."

Rafayel's fingers crept higher, his touch now a mere whisper against your skin as he approached the edge of your panties. "Here?"

His eyes held a challenge, daring you to beg for it, to plead for his touch. Sylus's fingers slid up to the underside of your breast, his thumb brushing the bottom curve teasingly. They were close, so close to where you needed them, to where your body screamed for their touch.

You swallowed the embarrassment. “My…” you huffed at the words stuck in her throat. “My cunt.

Without warning, Rafayel slid his hand beneath the fabric of your panties, his fingers finding your slick, swollen folds. He groaned at the feel of your arousal, his eyes fluttering shut for a moment before opening to pierce you with a hungry gaze.

"Fuuuuck," Rafayel breathed, his fingers stroking through your wetness, teasing your entrance. "You're fucking soaked, baby. Is this all for us?"

Behind you, Sylus growled approvingly, his hand cupping the full weight of your breast, kneading the soft flesh. "That's it, kitten. Tell us exactly what you want," he coaxed, his thumb and forefinger finding your nipple and pinching lightly.

Rafayel circled your clit with a feather light touch, not quite applying pressure, teasing you. His eyes, dark and hungry, watched your face intently, gauging your reactions to his touch. Sylus rolled your nipple between his fingers, tugging on it gently as his other hand slid down to your hip, holding you in place. "Don't be shy now," his lips brushing your ear. "Tell Rafayel exactly how you want him to touch you. Be specific."

You gasped as Sylus's fingers unzipped your skirt, the sound of the zipper teeth parting echoing in the air. The skirt fluttered to the floor, leaving you clad in nothing but your damp thong. You could feel the cool air against your newly exposed skin, making you shiver.

Rafayel's eyes flicked down to your newly exposed thighs "Or maybe...you want me to rip these panties off and bury my face between your legs until you scream?"

Sylus chuckled, his hands making quick work of your shirt. Buttons went flying as he tore it open, baring your lacy bra to his hungry gaze. "Mmm, I like the way you think," his fingers deftly unhooking the clasp at the front. Your breasts spilled free, nipples already hard and aching for his touch.

Rafayel's hands slid down your thighs, leaving your skin tingling with anticipation as he knelt before you. "Since you don't seem to have a preference, cutie," Rafayel murmured "I think I'll make the choice for you." He leaned in, his breath hot against your skin as he nuzzled into the apex of your thighs. Your thong was the only barrier left between you now, the damp fabric clinging to your swollen folds.

Sylus took the opportunity to press himself against your back, his muscular chest against your bare shoulder blades, his hips nestling your ass against his straining erection. "Let him taste you, kitten," Sylus said, his hands kneading your breasts, pinching your nipples. "I want to watch him devour your pretty little cunt until you're screaming"

Just as Sylus finished that sentence Rafayel leaned in and dragged the flat of his tongue along your clothed slit, groaning at the taste of your arousal. His hands gripped your hips, holding you in place as he began to lick and suck at your aching sex through the damp fabric, his nose nestling against your clit.

Sylus rolled and pinched your nipples, sending sparks of pleasure racing through your body. He rocked his hips against you, his clothed cock sliding along the cleft of your ass, letting you feel how hard he was, how much he wanted you. Your head fell back against Sylus's shoulder, your fingers tangling in Rafayel's hair as you gasped and moaned, your body already writhing with pleasure.

Rafayel hooked his fingers into the delicate lace of your thong and slowly peeled it down your thighs. He tossed it carelessly aside, leaving you bare and exposed before him. Sylus smirked, his eyes glinting with dark intent as he watched Rafayel admire your exposed sex. Without warning, he grabbed your thighs, his large hands easily encircling your legs just above the knees. "I think our dear Rafayel could use a little help"

You felt a tingle of Sylus's Evol power emanating from his hands, and suddenly, your thighs were lifted and positioned over Rafayel's shoulders. He grunted in surprise, quickly catching on and gripping your hips for support.

"Much better," Sylus said approvingly, his fingers kneading the soft flesh of your inner thighs as Rafayel found himself face to face with your dripping, needy cunt. "Well, hello there, beautiful," he murmured, his breath hot and heavy against your swollen folds. "Aren't you just the prettiest little thing." He leaned in, his tongue darting out to flick against your clit, drawing a sharp gasp from your lips. "Mmm, and you taste even better than you look," Rafayel purred, his voice a low, sinful rumble.

"Fuck, kitten," Sylus groaned, watching Rafayel work. "The way he's devouring your cunt, you'd think he was starving for it. And judging by how wet you are, I'd say you've been craving his touch just as much."

Sylus's fingers dug into the meat of your thighs, holding you in place as Rafayel licked and lapped at your folds, savoring you.

Rafayel paused his ministrations, his lips glistening with your juices as he gazed up at you, his eyes burning with intense desire. He gripped your hips tighter, his fingers sinking into the supple flesh of your ass. "If these were my last moments on this earth," Rafayel murmured, his voice a low, fervent whisper, "there is no better way to go than with your legs wrapped tightly around my head and my tongue buried deep in this pretty little cunt."

Sylus chuckled, amused by Rafayel's words. "Do you hear that, kitten?" his fingers still gripping your thighs tightly. "Rafayel is already so pussydrunk, he's ready to worship it like it's the last thing in the world." As he spoke, Sylus used his Evol to keep your legs securely draped over Rafayel's shoulders, leaving you open and exposed to his eager mouth. His other hand came down to gently, but firmly, spread your pussy lips apart, revealing the glistening pink folds within.

Rafayel's eyes darkened with lust at the sight, his tongue darting out to teasingly circle your now fully exposed clit. Sylus pinched and rolled your nipple between his fingers, sending jolts of pleasure pain straight to your core. "Go on then, Rafayel," he encouraged him "Indulge yourself. Taste every drop of our girl's sweet nectar."

He leaned down to nip at your earlobe, his lips brushing against your ear as he whispered, "Be a good girl for him, kitten. Ride his face until you drench him in your cum. Show him what this pretty cunt can do." With that, Sylus gave your nipple a sharp tug, the slight discomfort only heightening the intense pleasure radiating from your core.

Unable to resist the overwhelming urge any longer, you began to grind your hips against Rafayel's face, riding his tongue with desperate need. Soft, needy whimpers spilled from your lips as you chased the pleasure he offered. Rafayel groaned in approval, the vibrations of his voice sending delicious shivers through your core as he gripped your hips tighter, pulling you harder against his mouth. He licked and suckled at your clit, his tongue delving deep into your entrance to taste your essence directly from the source.

Sylus continued his own sensual assault, rolling and pinching your nipples between his skilled fingers. He nipped at your throat, his teeth grazing your pulse point before sucking a dark mark into your skin. "Fuck, I love seeing you like this. Completely lost in pleasure, putting on a show just for us."

"That's it, kitten, grind on his face, fuck yourself on his tongue. Use him for your pleasure until you're screaming our names and gushing all over him."

Rafayel plunged two long fingers deep into your dripping cunt, curling them just perfectly to hit that special spot inside you. The sudden, intense stimulation was too much, and you came undone with a scream of pure ecstasy.

"FUCKKK!" you cried out, your voice echoing off the walls as your body convulsed and shook. Your inner walls clamped down around Rafayel's fingers, rippling and fluttering as a wave of pleasure crashed over you.

Rafayel continued to pump his fingers in and out of your spasming sex, his tongue flicking rapidly over your clit, drawing out your intense orgasm for as long as possible. He groaned in satisfaction, the sound muffled by your thighs and your gushing arousal flooding his mouth.

As the final waves of your intense orgasm subsided, you felt the warmth of Sylus's Evol dissipating from your thighs. Slowly, your legs slipped from Rafayel's shoulders, and you found yourself standing once more, positioned between the two men. Rafayel sat back on his heels, his lips and chin glistening with your essence as he gazed up at you with a look of pure satisfaction. He licked his lips, savoring your taste. When he stood, you immediately reached for the hem of his shirt, a fierce hunger in your eyes as you began to tug it upwards. He raised his arms, allowing you to peel the it off his toned body, revealing the lean muscles and smooth pale skin beneath.

Without pausing, you attacked his pants next, your fingers making quick work of the button and zipper. You yanked them down his legs, along with his underwear, leaving him just as bare as you were.

Rafayel let out a soft chuckle, amused by your eager desperation. "Eager, aren't we?" he teased. His cock jutted out proudly from a nest of dark curls, long, thick and already leaking at the tip. The sight made your mouth water, and you found yourself licking your lips unconsciously.

Sylus's hands slid around your waist, his fingers splaying across your stomach possessively. You could feel the heat of his breath on the back of your neck. You turned around to face Sylus, your eyes filled with the same desperate, lustful hunger you had shown Rafayel. Without a word, your hands reached for the buttons of Sylus's crisp black shirt, your fingers making quick work of the buttons.

He raised a brow, a smirk playing at the corners of his mouth as he watched you strip him with such eager desperation. "We have an impatient, kitten" He didn't resist as you shoved his shirt off his broad shoulders, revealing the network of scars that lined his skin. His chest was a work of art, each muscle clearly defined, his abs a perfect six pack.

Your fingers drifted lower, undoing his pants and tugging them down his thighs. Sylus stepped out of the pooled fabric, leaving him just as bare as you and Rafayel. His cock was a thing of beauty, thick and long, curving up towards his stomach. It was already rock hard, the head an angry red and leaking copiously. "Satisfied, kitten?" Sylus asked as he towered over you.

"Gorgeous isn't he?" Said rafayel behind you "But he's going to look even better with your perfect little pussy wrapped around his cock while you ride him." He gave Sylus a playful shove, urging him to sit back on the edge of the bed. As Sylus settled himself, his back against the headboard and his legs spread wide. "Go on, cutie," his eyes blazed with anticipation as he gestured to Sylus's impressive erection, standing tall and proud between his muscular thighs. "Climb on top and give us a show. Bounce on his cock until you're both screaming"

You climbed up onto the bed, straddling Sylus's muscular thighs as you gazed down at his cock, the thick, veiny length of him jutted out, so hard it seemed to throb with need. You couldn't help but doubt if he would fit inside you, your pussy clenching nervously at the thought.

Sylus smirked, sensing your hesitation. He reached out, his large hands gripping your hips possessively as he pulled you closer, the head of his cock catching against your dripping slit. "Don't worry, kitten, you can take it"

Just then, you felt Rafayel's presence behind you. His hands slid around your waist, his fingers splaying across your stomach as he pressed himself against your back.

"Shh, relax," Rafayel murmured in your ear, his breath hot against your skin. "You're going to feel amazing wrapped around him, cutie. His cock is going to fill you up perfectly." He nipped at your shoulder, soothing you with gentle kisses along your neck and collarbone. "Just take a deep breath and sink down. I promise, you'll fit every inch of him. You're going to love every second of it."

As you started to sink down onto Sylus's cock, you felt your tight walls stretching around his thick girth. Inch after inch disappeared inside you, filling and stretching you in a way you had never experienced before. However, as you reached the halfway point, you suddenly stopped, your hips hovering just above Sylus's as a flicker of panic crossed your face. You clenched down around him, your inner muscles fluttering and quivering as they struggled to accommodate his size.

"I...I don't think I can go any lower," you gasped out, your voice strained with a mixture of pleasure and discomfort. "You're too big, Sylus. I can't...I can't take all of you."

Behind you, Rafayel felt your stomach bulge slightly from the massive intrusion of Sylus's cock stretching your tight walls. He rubbed soothing circles over your taut belly, murmuring words of encouragement in your ear.

"Shh, just relax, cutie," Rafayel cooed, his hands kneading the flesh of your hips and stomach. "You can take this. Breathe through it."

He angled your hips slightly, tilting them in a way that allowed you to sink down a little further. At the same time, Sylus gripped your waist tighter, his hips surging up to meet yours.

The dual movement caused you to slide down Sylus's thick shaft, impaling yourself on every last inch of his cock. Your eyes rolled back in your head as you threw your head back with a loud moan.

"FUCK!" you cried out "Oh god, Sylus! You're so deep...so big...ahhh!" Your pussy clenched and spasmed around his throbbing member, trying desperately to adjust to the stretch. You could feel every ridge, every vein, every pulsing throb and twitch of his cock buried deep inside your core. Sylus groaned, his head falling back against the headboard as your scorching heat engulfed him completely.

Rafayel glanced at Sylus, a smug grin spreading across his face as he saw the look of pure bliss etched onto his features. Sylus's eyes were squeezed shut, his brows furrowed and his jaw clenched as he struggled to maintain his composure in the face of the exquisite pleasure your tight, wet cunt was inflicting upon him.

"Wow, Sylus," Rafayel teased, "Not a word? I guess congratulations are in order, cutie. Your perfect little cunt has left our friend here completely speechless."

He punctuated his words with a roll of your hips, grinding you down against Sylus's pelvis and making you both groan at the intense sensation. Rafayel's hands slid up to your breasts, kneading and squeezing the soft mounds as he played with your nipples.

"How does she feel, Sylus?" Rafayel asked with a chuckle, knowing full well the other man was too lost in pleasure to form a coherent response. Sylus could only let out another groan in response, his fingers digging into the flesh of your hips hard enough to leave bruises. His eyes were squeezed shut, his breathing ragged as he fought to maintain his composure.

Rafayel just smirked, loving the way your body had rendered Sylus at your mercy. "That's it, cutie," he murmured, his lips brushing against your neck. "You've got him right where you want him. Now let's see if we you can make him beg for more..."

You started to move, your hands braced against Sylus's broad, muscular chest for leverage. Slowly, you lifted your hips until just the tip of his cock remained inside you, before sinking back down with a low moan.

Up and down you went, finding a rhythm as you rode Sylus. Your inner walls clung to him, slick and tight, creating a delicious friction that made you both groan with each movement. His hands roamed your body greedily, squeezing and groping every curve. He palmed your ass, spreading your cheeks and pulling you down harder onto his cock. His fingers dug into the soft flesh of your thighs, guiding your movements as you bounced on his lap.

"Fuck, just like that," Sylus said, voice strained with pleasure. "Ride my cock, kitten. Take every inch of it" Rafayel watched the erotic spectacle with hooded eyes, his own arousal growing at the sight of you lost in lust.

"That's it, cutie. I want to see you fuck him into oblivion."

As you continued to ride Sylus with increasing fervor, you felt Rafayel's hands grip your hips tightly, his fingers sinking into your soft flesh. Just as you were about to cry out from the intense pleasure, you felt one of his hands snake around your hip, his fingers finding your sensitive, throbbing clit. He began to circle the swollen nub, rubbing and teasing it with skilled, practiced motions. The added stimulation made your walls clamp down even harder around Sylus's cock.

"Ohhh, FUCK!" Sylus roared, his head slamming back against the headboard as your clenching pussy pushed him to the brink. "Your cunt...god, it's squeezing me so fucking tightly. Don't stop, kitten. Keep milking my cock just like that."

His fingers dug into the soft flesh of your thighs, holding on for dear life as you rode him. His hips surged up to meet yours, slamming his cock into you with deep, powerful thrusts that made your tits bounce and jiggle with each impact.

You felt Rafayel hot breath fanning over your neck as he continued to stimulate your clit, pushing you closer and closer to the edge. "That's it, ride him harder, fuck him deeper. I want to see you milk his cock for every last drop of cum. Give him the best fuck of his life."

You were lost in a haze of pleasure, your body writhing and undulating as you rode Sylus's cock with wild enthusiasm. Your cries of ecstasy filled the room, mingling with Sylus's guttural groans and Rafayel's encouragement.

The final straw that sent you both hurtling over the edge was when Rafayel's hand slid down to Sylus's heavy balls. He massaged the sensitive balls, feeling them draw up tight as Sylus's orgasm approached. At the same time, Rafayel pinched your clit hard, the sharp sting of pain blending deliciously with the overwhelming pleasure. Your pussy clenched down viciously around Sylus's cock, gripping him as your orgasm crashed over you.

"FUCK! I'm...I'm going to cum!" Sylus screamed. His cock throbbed and pulsed inside you, growing even harder and bigger as his release neared. Your screams of rapture mingled with Sylus's cries, the sound of flesh slapping against flesh filling the room as you both hurtled towards your peaks. Sylus's hips jerked and stuttered, losing rhythm as he fucked up into you.

Rafayel jerked his hips forward, grinding your clit hard against Sylus's pelvis as he felt the other man's balls draw up tight. "Now, Sylus!" Rafayel commanded. "Cum for her! Fill her little cunt with your seed!" With a final, brutal thrust, Sylus buried himself to the hilt inside your spasming pussy. His cock erupted like a geyser, painting your insides white with thick, hot ropes of cum. Jet after jet of jizz pumped into you as Sylus moaned his release, his body shuddering and convulsing beneath you.

Your combined orgasms seemed to last an eternity, your bodies shaking and shuddering as you rode out the aftershocks. Finally, you collapsed against Sylus's sweat slicked chest, both of you panting and gasping for air.

"I bet people would pay a pretty penny to see their beloved leader reduced to such a debauched state. Sylus, the great and powerful, brought to his knees by Linkon's most beautiful hunter"

Sylus gasped sharply as your laugh made your inner muscles clench and ripple around his sensitive, softening cock. He gripped your hips tighter, fingers digging into your flesh as he fought to maintain control.

"Don't make her laugh, Rafayel," Sylus growled, his voice still strained from the aftershocks of his intense orgasm. "Every time she does, her perfect little cunt squeezes me. Fuck, I can feel every inch of my cock even now..."

He rolled his hips up slightly, grinding his pelvis against yours and making you both groan at the sensation. Your combined juices, a mix of your arousal and his release, leaked out around his shaft, dripping down onto his balls and the sheets below.

Rafayel let out a low, appreciative whistle as he drank in the erotic sight before him, his artist's eye savoring every detail. He could see Sylus's thick, pearly essence slowly seeping out around your stretched, puffy lips where you remained impaled on the other man's cock. The creamy fluid trickled down, staining the expensive sheets beneath you.

"Fuck, what a gorgeous sight," his voice heavy with lust. "The way his cum is leaking out of your perfect little pussy, it's absolutely exquisite."

"I could paint this moment, cutie. Capture the way Sylus's release is dripping out of your sexy, well-fucked cunt... it would be my magnum opus. A masterpiece dedicated to the sheer erotic beauty of your body and its effect on him." Rafayel's hand slid down, collecting some of the leaking essence on his fingers. He brought them to his lips, making a show of licking them clean, his tongue swirling around the digits to lap up every drop of your combined juices. "Mmm, and to think, I'd only be able to paint it once I'd thoroughly tasted every drop of your combined pleasure. For art, and for my own selfish indulgence, of course."

Sylus just groaned, his fingers kneading the globes of your ass as he listened to Rafayel's words. He knew he should feel some measure of outrage at the way the other man spoke of his lover. And yet, the way your body trembled and clenched around his cock with each filthy word only served to arouse him again. It seemed there was no end to the ways you could reduce him to a state of desperate, aching need.

Before Sylus could gather the strength to fuck you again, he sat up suddenly, his hands gripping your waist tightly. With a grunt, he slowly slipped his softening cock out of your dripping cunt. You felt every thick inch of him sliding out, a fresh gush of your mixed releases spilling out of your fluttering hole as he withdrew. Then lifted you up and placed you right in front of Rafayel, your back pressing against the other man's chest. You could feel the heat radiating off Rafayel's naked body, his skin warm and slightly damp with sweat from the erotic show he'd just witnessed.

At the same time, you felt Rafayel's hard, throbbing cock press firmly against the cleft of your ass. It nestled in the valley between your cheeks, the thick shaft pulsing with need, smearing your skin with his pre-cum. His hands slid around your waist, one coming to rest low on your belly while the other cupped your breast possessively. He rolled and plucked at your nipple, pinching the sensitive bud between his fingers as he ground his hips against your ass.

Sylus shifted position, lying on his stomach on the bed as he watched the two of you with a mix of satisfaction and renewed lust. He propped himself up on his elbows, his crimson eyes dark and intense as he gazed at your naked bodies.

You and Rafayel remained kneeling on the bed, your back pressed against his chest. You could his heart pounding, matching the frantic beating of your own as anticipation built between you both.

Suddenly, Sylus reached out and grabbed Rafayel's rigid cock. He gave it a few firm strokes, smearing the copious pre cum that leaked from the tip all along the thick shaft. When he lined up Rafayel's throbbing cock with your dripping entrance, a jolt of electricity seemed to course through your body. It was a thrilling mix of excitement, vulnerability and deep arousal to see Sylus's strong hand wrapped around Rafayel's cock, guiding it to penetrate you.

"Fuck, Sylus!" Rafayel gasped, his hips bucking reflexively at the sensation of Sylus's touch on his aching cock. His fingers dug into the soft flesh of your hips as he tried to hold back from simply thrusting forward and burying himself inside you.

Sylus just smirked at Rafayel's reaction, his grip tightening slightly around the other man's thick shaft. He looked up at you both with a wicked glint in his eyes, enjoying the power he held in that moment.

"Go ahead, Rafayel, fuck her, claim her. Show me how much you want her, how badly you need to fill her up." With those words, Sylus pressed the swollen head of Rafayel's cock against your entrance, feeling it catch and then slowly sink into your soaked folds. The sensation made you both gasp, your head falling back against Rafayel's shoulder as your slick walls stretched and welcomed the thick intrusion.

Sylus watched with a mix of awe and lust-darkened eyes as you began to bounce on Rafayel's cock, your hips rising and falling in a sensual dance. The sight of your slick cunt swallowing up Rafayel's thick shaft over and over again was almost too much for him to bear.

"Goddamnit," Sylus swore under his breath. His eyes raked over your bouncing body, taking in the way your full breasts swayed with each movement, the hard points of your nipples just begging to be touched. He sat up on his knees and without warning, he leaned in and captured one of your bouncing nipples between his full, sensual lips. He suckled hard, his tongue swirling around the sensitive peak as he drew it into the wet heat of his mouth.

"Ohhh fuck!" you cried out, the dual stimulation of Rafayel's cock pounding into you and Sylus's mouth on your breast sending shockwaves of pleasure coursing through your body. You reached back to tangle your fingers in Rafayel's short dark hair, holding him close as he pistoned his hips, driving his cock deeper and harder into your grasping cunt.

Sylus determined to mark you as his own, just as Rafayel was claiming you so roughly from behind, switched to your other breast, giving it the same treatment as he sucked hard, leaving dark hickeys blooming on your skin. His hand slid down to grope and knead the globe of your ass, holding you in place as Rafayel fucked into you. Rafayel panted harshly against your neck, his hips slapping against the globes of your ass with each powerful thrust. "God, your cunt feels incredible," he groaned, feeling your walls squeezing his cock. "So fucking tight and wet... "

As Sylus continued his assault now on your collarbones, leaving a trail of dark, claiming marks in his wake, you felt Rafayel's hot breath ghosting over your neck. His panting grew more ragged as he pistoned his hips with increasing fervor, the sound of skin slapping against skin filling the room. In the heat of the moment, Rafayel's intense eyes locked with Sylus's dark, hungry gaze over your shoulder. For a charged second, they seemed to communicate something primal and possessive, a silent agreement passing between them. It was a look that spoke of a shared desire, a mutual hunger to lay claim to every inch of your body.

The air between them practically crackled with tension, the weight of their combined lust and desire threatening to overwhelm you. You could feel the power dynamic shifting, the balance of control tilting precariously as both men sought to assert their dominance over you in their own ways. And in a moment of dizzying desire, you grabbed both Sylus and Rafayel, pulling them in close. As you did, their faces turned towards each other, meeting in a messy, passionate kiss. It was a clash of lips and tongues, a tangle of hot breath and muffled moans. Sylus's hand slid up from your hip to grip the back of Rafayel's neck, holding him in place as he dominated the kiss. Rafayel responded just as fervently, his own hand fisting in Sylus's short white hair. And you were caught in the middle, your tongue darting out to dance and twine with both of theirs. It was a sensual, erotic dance of lips and limbs, the three of you writhing together in a tangle of sweat slicked skin and throbbing, aching need.

Throughout the messy, passionate kiss, Rafayel never ceased his relentless thrusting, his thick cock pounding into your dripping cunt. "She's close," Rafayel panted against your lips, his voice strained with exertion and pleasure. In an instant, Sylus pulled away from the messy three way kiss and shifted positions, moving back down to lie on his stomach between your spread thighs and without hesitation he leaned in and dragged the flat of his tongue along your dripping slit, tasting the heady mix of your arousal and Rafayel's pre cum. He groaned at the flavor, his grip tightening on your thighs as he held you in place, keeping you spread wide open for his hungry mouth.

Sylus focused his attention on your sensitive, throbbing clit, suckling and flicking the bud with skillful strokes of his tongue.

"Fuck, Sylus!" Rafayel grunted from behind you, his hips snapping harder, fucking into your fluttering walls as he felt your body tensing, climbing rapidly towards a shattering peak. "Don't stop, make her cum on your tongue while I fill her up!"

"I can't... it's too much," you whimpered, overwhelmed by the intense sensations assaulting your body from all sides. Your legs trembled and your toes curled as Sylus's skilled tongue pushed you to the brink of a massive climax. Rafayel just growled in your ear, his voice low and commanding. "You can. Give it to us. Cum on my cock, let go. I want to feel your sweet little cunt squeezing me as you come undone." Sylus doubled his efforts, sucking your clit hard into his mouth.

The dual stimulation was too intense to resist. Your back arched, pressing your breast into Rafayel's palm as he groped it roughly. A high, keening cry tore from your throat as your orgasm crashed over you. Your walls clamped down viciously on Rafayel's cock, rippling and fluttering as you came harder than you ever had before. Clear fluid gushed from your spasming cunt dripping down onto Sylus's eagerly lapping tongue. Sylus just moaned in delight, lapping up your release pushing you to ride out the aftershocks of your intense climax. Behind you, Rafayel grunted and slammed into you one, two, three more times before burying himself to the hilt and coming with a guttural groan. You could feel his seed flooding your insides, painting your walls white as he filled you up just like he promised.

When Sylus sat back up, his chin and lips were glistening with your combined arousal. He gathered a generous amount of the slick fluid dripping from your cunt onto his long fingers. Turning to Rafayel, he commanded in a low, authoritative tone "Open your mouth, Rafayel. Taste what you've done to our girl."

As Rafayel complied, Sylus pushed his coated fingers past his lips, making him suck them clean. At the same time, Sylus turned to you, his dark eyes blazing into yours with lust and possessive hunger.

"Open up, baby," he ordered, his voice a low, seductive rumble. "I want you to taste how fucking sexy you are" Unable to resist the commanding tone and the intense desire burning in Sylus's eyes, you parted your lips, allowing him to lean in and spit the mouthful of your mixed essence past your lips. The taste of your own arousal, blended with Sylus's and Rafayel's unique flavors, was overwhelming, you couldn't help but moan at the taste, your tongue darting out to lick your lips clean. The depravity of the act, of being fed your own cum by both of your lovers, sent a dark thrill rushing through you. You could feel Rafayel's softening cock still buried deep inside your fluttering cunt, as Sylus's fingers slid from Rafayel's mouth and he leaned in to capture your lips in a searing, filthy kiss.

As the intense sensations and emotions overwhelmed you, your body went limp, and you collapsed back against Rafayel's chest. He immediately wrapped his strong arms around you, holding you close as you both caught your breath.

"It's okay cutie," Rafayel murmured, pressing soft kisses to your temple and stroking your hair soothingly. "You did so well, taking us both like that. Such a good girl."

As he spoke, Sylus began to carefully extract Rafayel's softening cock from your dripping cunt. He gathered more of the mixed essence that leaked out in its wake, bringing his coated fingers to his mouth to lick them clean with a low, appreciative moan. Meanwhile, Rafayel shifted your limp, sated body to lie across the bed, his arms still wrapped protectively around you. He brushed your sweat dampened hair back from your face, his fingertips tracing the delicate lines of your features with a lover's tender touch.

Before the comforting darkness of sleep could claim you, you felt the gentle caress of a warm, damp cloth against your sensitive, overheated skin. Sylus was there, his touch tender and almost reverent as he began to clean the sweat and other evidence of your passionate encounter from your body.

He started at your neck, wiping away the lingering marks of his passion - the reddened skin and saliva where he had sucked and bitten in the throes of lust. The warm cloth felt soothing against your skin, and you couldn't help but sigh softly as Sylus took his time, meticulously cleaning every inch of your neck, collarbone, and the tops of your breasts.

As Sylus tended to you, Rafayel kept you nestled against him, one arm wrapped securely around your waist while the other hand continued to stroke your hair, occasionally brushing a few lingering kisses across your forehead and temple. Sylus's gentle ministrations and Rafayel's tender affections was almost too much, and you could feel yourself slipping towards a deep, well earned slumber.

Sylus worked his way down, wiping the sweat and other fluids from your stomach, hips, and thighs with the same thorough, almost worshipful focus. By the time he reached your most intimate area, your breathing had evened out and your body had gone pliant, ready to surrender to the promise of rest.

#love and deepspace #lnds #lads #lads smut #lads x reader #lnds x reader #lads x you #lnds x you #love and deepspace reader #lads sylus #sylus smut #sylus x reader #l&ds sylus #love and deepspace sylus #rafayel love and deepspace #lads rafayel #rafayel smut #rafayel x mc x sylus #love and deepspace rafayel

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whoredyceps · 2 days ago

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"OH LOVER BOY!" || 28 Days of Love: A Valentine's Challenge + Series

day twenty-six: possessive

ᰔ pairing: joel miller x reader

ᰔ summary: you and joel spend a friday night at the bar, which ends up with bloody hands and a hospital visit.

ᰔ author's note: a change of plot in the ninth hour thanks to that one picture. it's past 10pm and i'm writing like a madman. send help please god. inspired by this picture ✋😮‍💨

ᰔ content warning: no outbreak but canon typical violence, irritable joel, bar setting, alcohol consumption, creepy bar patrons, reader gets hit on, blood, hospitals, doctors, strong language

"Are you sure you want to go in? We can head back home and watch a movie," you offered. "Let's go out another night."

Joel shook his head, his hand extended out to cut the engine of the truck. He wanted to give in to your offer— turn right around and drive straight back home. Dread had filled him the minute he sat in the truck.

At the beginning of the week, you had asked to go out to the bar on Friday. Some of your friends were supposed to be getting together for drinks and pool. You agreed, and they urged you to bring the guy you had been seeing. When you brought it up to Joel, he surprised you with a nod and a 'sure, it'd be nice to get out'.

"We'll have a good time. Figure it'll be good to let your friends see I'm not just some cranky bastard," Joel huffed out a laugh. He had an amused smile on his lips as he climbed out of the car.

"Oh, I don't think you'll be less cranky," you chuckled. "That's okay. They know I like them bitchy." You put a hand on his chest and kissed him once he was close enough. Joel rolled his eyes; you swore they'd fall out of his skull with how often he did it.

"Bitchy? That's a new one." Joel opened the door for you as the two of you approached. You glanced over your shoulder.

"No it ain't. No one's bold enough to say it to your face," you chuckled.

Like most dive bars, the place was packed for a Friday night. The crowd ranged from long time regulars that regaled with each other to college kids that were too proud of their fake ids that no one really cared about.

You scanned the crowd to find your friends, who were tucked in the back. They were all gathered around a pool table and on what seemed to be the second round of drinks. You slipped your hand into Joel's and led him through the crowd. Before you got too far, he planted his feet. You turned, a look of confusion written on your face.

"I'll get us some drinks," Joel offered. You nodded and thanked him with a kiss. His hand slipped out of yours— he already knew your drink of choice. The two of you hadn't been together more than a few months, but he paid enough attention.

You joined your friends and gave the round of hugs and greetings.

"No 'Joel' tonight?" One of your friends teased as they elbowed your side. You shook your head and crossed your arms.

"Nope, but I did pick up that hot guy at the bar on the way in," you teased back. Every set of eyes turned to the bar to analyze the man in the flannel, his back turned to you.

"Bitch, that's fucking Joel. You posted a story with him in that same shirt a week ago," another friend chided. You cackled as she punched your arm. Your other friends waved you off or flipped the bird.

None of your friends had met Joel yet, but they had seen and heard more than enough about him. They knew he wasn't very social so as soon as you said he would come along, there was a buzz of excitement.

"He offered to grab us some drinks. What was I gonna do, say no?" You watched as two of your friends argued over the rules of pool. They fought like this every time, so you tuned them out.

Joel returned with two drinks in hand, a beer and one of your old faithfuls. He slipped a hand onto the small of your back. Your shirt shifted and you felt the press of his fingertips against your skin. A small shiver came over you.

"Guys, this is Joel. Joel, these are my friends." You went through the group and introduced everyone by name. Joel, ever the southern gentleman, shook everyone's hand and gave a polite hello.

You stuck close to Joel as the two of you settled into the group. He fit in easily as he jested with your friends. He even offered to play a round of pool with one of the guys— totally unprompted!

As you watched him and chatted with a friend, you noticed how quickly your drink had disappeared. With a small pout, you held your glass up.

"I'm going to get another drink! Be right back," you yelled over the loud background noise. He gave a nod, and you slipped him to head for the bar.

Since you had arrived, the bar had only grown more rowdy. It seemed the football team from the local college had finished their practice and wanted to party. You couldn't blame them, considering the drinks were cheap and it wasn't a far drive from the stadium. Still, you had to practically elbow your way to the bar.

As you waited for the bartender to finish with their current task, you felt a presence beside you. That, and you could practically smell them from where you stood. God, college boys smelled just as bad axe-laden middle schoolers.

"You all by yourself?" You almost didn't believe the boy was talking to you. If not for him pressing closer to you, you would have ignored him all together.

"No," you replied. "I'm here to grab a drink for myself and my boyfriend." You tried to move away, only to end up squished between an older woman and the man with no clear sense of personal space.

"I don't see him," he chided with a smirk. "Isn't that what they all say? I've got a boyfriend, a girlfriend, a partner— yet no one by their side."

You whirled around with a raised eyebrow.

"You do know that I don't have to stand near him all night, correct? Just because we're not next to each other doesn't mean I don't have a boyfriend," you returned. The boy rolled his eyes and leaned on the bar.

"Baby—"

Your skin crawled at the name. Nothing angered you more than some shitty pet name from some random guy who didn't know you. The only person who deserved to call you baby was across the bar and in the middle of a pool game.

"I'm not your baby. Don't call me that," you snapped. "Can I just get my drink in peace? I'm not going to be polite next time." You turned your shoulder, your back to him as you waved down the bartender. She was on her way to you when a hand landed on your waist. It made your skin crawl as you launched yourself away from the bar.

"What, baby? You a fuckin' prude or something? Savin' yourself for your little imaginary boyfriend?" The tone in his voice had you seeing red. Your fists balled up and your expression twisted into one of rage.

"Is this how you pick people up at the bar? How's being an idiot working out for you?" You had to take a deep breath before you went in swinging. It had not been the first time you had been in a bar fight, and it seemed old habits died hard.

"Worked every time before. C'mere, baby, I'll buy you—"

You watched the scene play out in slow motion. One minute, the idiot's hand stretched out to grab for your hand. In a blink, a big, calloused hand grab his wrist and yanked him away from the bar.

Joel looked enraged. You had seen him angry plenty of times, but this was different. His lips were downturned, but the look in his eyes scared you. Not for yourself— god, even the idea seemed ridiculous to you— but for the dumbass.

"Choose your next words carefully. Say baby one more time, pretty boy." Joel's tone sent a shiver down your spine. It was almost like he was begging the boy to do something dumb.

"Get the fuck off of me, old man. Like you have a better chance with the bitch."

Oh.

Yeah, this boy was gonna die. Time stood still as you watched the football player try to deck Joel with his only free hand. In one swift move, he yanked the boy's arm forward and threw him onto the ground. He managed to land a punch that sent a crack so loud that the bar fell into a hush.

The boy yelped and tried to swing back, but Joel was quicker. He had at least fifty pounds and half a foot on him. That, and a load of unbridled rage. He didn't take kindly to harassment, but to insult you in the process? Call you a bitch?

You stood, your mouth open in pure shock. Truth be told, you were glued to your spot. Two men managed to pull Joel off, while a few other bystanders tried to stop the boy's scrawny friends from getting the same ass-whooping.

Finally, as if your brain seemed to come back to Earth, you blinked and lurched towards Joel. You blatantly stepped over the boy to get to your boyfriend. His hands were bloody and his expression was soured.

"Hey, hey— Joel, baby, take a deep breath," you muttered. The two men who held him back lead him towards the exit, and you followed. One of the guys opened the door, and you took his spot as you guided him outside. You thanked the men as you managed to unlock the truck bed. Joel sat with a heavy sigh and murmured a thanks under his breath.

"Can I see your hands?" Your voice was soft. The air was cool and loud with the sound of the frogs all around. Joel was silent as he let you hold his hands. He sucked in a sharp breath when you fiddled with a few fingers.

"This looks broken," you frowned. "We need to get you to the hospital." You didn't care that Joel's hand was full of blood, or that his hackles were still raised. If you weren't so concerned, you'd be in shock still.

"It can wait until tomorrow," Joel gruffed. He never meant for it to happen, him beating the living daylights out of the idiot, but he'd be damned if he'd let someone talk about you like that. If anything, the kid's lucky enough walking away alive and talking.

"Please," you asked. "What if it's something serious?" If something bad happened to Joel, especially after he got hurt defending you, you'd be beside yourself.

By some miracle, or maybe the worry written all over your face, Joel conceded with a nod. He got off the edge of the truck bed and began for the driver's seat.

"Oh, absolutely not. I'm driving. Go." You weren't going to take no for an answer. Joel gave you the keys before he climbed into the passenger seat.

The ride to the hospital was short and silent. It wasn't uncomfortable, but you weren't sure what to say. How did you thank your boyfriend for beating some guy's ass? It was more than some verbal acknowledgment— did you buy him dinner? Suck his dick? All of the above?

You helped with the check-in process once at the hospital. As the two of you waited to be called to the back, you laid your head on Joel's shoulder.

"Thank you for defending me. I don't know what that guy's problem was." You felt Joel's jaw rest against your head. He reached over to hold your arm with his uninjured hand.

"Dumbass was too big for his britches. I only caught the tail end, but I figured it out real quick when I saw your face. If I hadn't'a swung first, it woulda been you." Joel knew that, no questions asked. If someone was going to get charges pressed, he'd rather it be himself than you.

"Shit, you're right. Though my uppercut wouldn't have done much, at least compared to your hit. I mean goddamn," you chucked under your breath. "You damn near knocked him into next Tuesday."

"Still wouldn't have been enough if I had. Who calls someone a bitch like that? Fuckin' vile, that piece'a shit," Joel grumbled under his breath.

Once he was called to the back, they made quick work on setting his hand in place. Joel bit back a groan as they popped his fingers into the right place and put a brace on his hand. He was sent off with a prescription for painkillers and an order for no heavy lifting. That hurt him more than anything else.

"Shoulda just put me down instead," Joel grumbled as he followed you out of the emergency room. You held good arm as you guided him to the truck.

"It won't be that bad. Maybe you'll actually get some rest," you lightly teased. Joel attempted to chuckle, but it just came out as an amused huff. He didn't even try to go for the driver's side. Not like he'd be able to drive for another week, at least.

"Don't go for miracles," Joel warned. You rolled your eyes, a small smile on your face.

"Eh, I'll take my chances."

Despite the unfortunate circumstances, Joel actually did rest. You thanked him with words, dinner, and a few orgasms to show how truly thankful you really were. No one had stuck up for you like that, and to have someone defend you like that...

Joel deserved more than you could ever give, but you'd try your damnedest for him.

#joel miller #the last of us #tlou #pedro pascal #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller fic #x reader #x reader fic #the last of us fic #gwen writes #pedrohub #ppcu #ppcu fics #pedrito #oh lover boy #valentine's day #reader fic #reader insert

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transmutationisms · 3 days ago

Note

Hey. So that claim that stimulants do completely different things for people who “have ADHD” and “don’t have ADHD” is obviously bullshit but I was wondering if you happen to have read anything I could refer to about that

Okay I want to try using this to break down how I would actually approach this type of question, inspired by some posts I've seen recently about how to read and analyse things that are wrong / bad / liberal.

I don't have, off the top of my head, a published & refereed source that discusses this particular claim. I'm pretty certain there is at least one such thing out there. But I'm also pretty confident it won't be very good. The claim it's responding to is relatively historically recent, & is cloaked in still-fashionable neurobiological terms. Also, the literature on ADHD is bad in general, and so is the general quality of the kinds of imaging studies that are cited to support such claims about 'brain differences.'

If I were writing a literature review or a historiography, here is the part where I would need to go find these things anyway. Then I would have to explain how they make their arguments and what's missing, and depending on the scope of the piece I might have to explain my own philosophical / political position, and advance my methodological critique of the literature I just spent several days finding & reading.

Fortunately I'm writing a tumblr post & my sense is your actual question is "how can I better argue against this obviously bullshit claim," so I don't have to do any of that. There's not really much point sinking that kind of time and effort into finding a source I already think is unlikely to adequately make the argument I'm looking for anyway.

Instead, I would now look at the claim itself. What must be true in order for it to hold?

ADHD brains differ from non-ADHD brains

This difference is relevant to the action/metabolism of stimulant drugs

Okay, claim two on that list requires dealing with psychopharmacology & very exact physiological mechanisms, which means a shitload more reading and most of it punishingly dry and technical. Sad & bad.

Fortunately, though, I already know -- from every reading ever, as well as my experience existing on earth -- that ADHD is not diagnosed by any sort of brain scan, anatomical observation, blood test, etc, but by subjective (yes, even if they made you do it on a computer) clinical observation. Hmm, that's super weird for something that is a 'brain difference.'

I also know that psychiatric categories are difficult to correlate with biological observations even where those observations do exist, because an imaging study on ADHD is necessarily only pulling the 'ADHD sample' from people already diagnosed with ADHD. It's circular. Philosophically this is the same problem I laid out in section one of 'What is an alien?' (which you can read & understand even if the main topic of the essay doesn't interest you).

And I also know that brain imaging studies generally are riddled with serious methodological flaws (post discusses the dead salmon study among others) and don't actually produce meaningful, replicable biological distinctions in any kind of correlation with psychiatric categories (also, variation within categories is also very high).

Oh, wait. Now the claim above looks like patent nonsense with zero philosophical foundations. The burden of proof is on whoever's making that claim, & the basic underlying principles are wrong. Yayyyy.

This exercise means 1) I've sat down and reasoned through my own opinion, giving me clarity on why I think what I do and what evidence would change my mind and 2) from now on, when I see someone else make the claim I'm responding to here, I'll know off the bat that they haven't done the same & are starting from a very credulous attitude toward very low-quality research. And I didn't do this by trawling the literature until I found the exact thing I was looking for, but by thinking through the arguments and evaluating a body of literature that is generally explicitly hostile to the kinds of critiques I make & respect.

#psychiatry #research and methods

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larluce · 2 days ago

Text

Merlin arrives with a baby in Camelot AU

(co-writing with @roxineedstosleep )

BASED ON THIS PROMPT >> PREVIOUS PART >> NEXT PART

Chapter 2: A Baby's Call (Part 2)

In Gaius' chambers.

Merlin: (sits down, holding the baby to feed her)

Gaius: Here (gives him a baby bottle)

Merlin: Thanks. (takes the bottle and starts feeding her. Then looks around, spots some broken things and laughs) I see the baby got you a bit of trouble too.

Gaius: She was upset when you weren't around indeed. But she calmed down eventually. (serves Merlin his food on the table) Do you want some vegetables with that?

Merlin: (snorts) I know you're still angry with me.

Gaius: Your mother asked me to look after you both. What she didn't tell me is that I'd have to look after two babies instead of one.

Merlin: I got it. I was stupid.

Gaius: (softens his expression as he looks Merlin feeding the baby, murmuring to himself) In a way, you are a baby looking after a baby.

Merlin: Uh?

Gaius: (outloud) What did your mother say to you about your gifts?

Merlin: That I'm special.

Gaius: You are both special. The likes of which I have never seen before. But it seems you are not the same kind of especial.

Merlin: (lifts his head, confused) What do you mean?

Gaius: Well, magic requires incantations, spells. It takes years to study. What you both do is elemental, instinctive. However, while your eyes glow gold when you do magic, the baby's stays the same.

Merlin: Which means...?

Gaius: I don't know. You both are a question that has never been posed before.

Merlin: Did you ever study magic?

Gaius: (pauses, hesitant) Uther banned all such work twenty years ago.

Merlin: (thinking) That's not what I asked... (says) Why?

Gaius: People used magic for the wrong end at that time. It threw the natural order into chaos. Uther made it his mission to destroy everything from back then, even the dragons.

Merlin: (surprised) What? All of them?

Gaius: There was one dragon he chose not to kill, kept it as an example. He imprisoned it in a cave deep beneath the castle where no one can free it.

Baby: (falls asleep) 😴

Merlin: (stands up and walks to the improvised crib they made for the baby and puts her there carefuly)

Gaius: Now, eat up. You can stay with the baby this time. I'll take Lady Helen the preparation for her voice.

Merlin: (smiles) Thank you (sits to eat, thinking) If the king managed to kill almost all the dragons. Then we can't stay here for long. I hope Gaius can contact the druids soon.

Time skip. In the Lower Town. Merlin looking for somewhere to buy milk when he encounters Arthur and his gang.

Merlin: (just passes by, ignoring them, thinking) Don't talk to me, don't talk to me, don't talk to me.

Arthur: How's your knee-walking coming along?

Merlin: (thinking) Shit... (keeps walking, ignoring them)

Arthur: (mocking) Oh, don't run away!

Merlin: (stops) From you?

Arthur: (sighs) Thank God. I thought you were deaf as well as dumb.

Merlin: (turning) Look, I've told you you're an ass- (cuts himself, not wanting to be send to the dungeons and be taken apart from his baby again) And I apologise for that.

Arthur: (surprised) Really?

Merlin: No, but I can't exactly speak my mind without being sent to the dungeons again, can I? (smiles forcely and bows in mockery) Your Higness. Please, go bother someone else.

Arthur: (amused And curious) And if I allowed you to speak your mind?

Merlin: Will I be sent to the dungeons after that?

Arthur: No.

Merlin: The stocks?

Arthur: You have my word no harm will come to you.

Merlin: Alright. (takes a deep breath) You are a spoiled, selfish royal prat. An ungrateful little shit, blind to the suffering of those who keep you fed, clothed, and alive. Do you even know what it is to work? To bleed? To starve?

Arthur: (his smirk falls) Hold on-

Merlin: And how do you repay the people who serves you? With cruelty and mockery. You think yourself noble because of the blood in your veins, but there is nothing noble about you. You are a leech, feeding off the labor of others while contributing nothing!

People around: (gasp)

Merlin: (bows) My lord.

Arthur: (angry) How dare you. I have fought for my people since a very young age, went to dignitary visits to maintain peace between kingdoms. So yes I do know what is to bleed and to work. But of course an ignorant peasant like you wouldn't know that.

Merlin: And yet you act like an idiot, using people as targets just for fun!

Arthur: Don't pretend you know me.

Merlin: I don't NEED to know you and I don't WANT to know you. Just. Leave me. Alone.

Knights: (wait for Arthur to tell them what do)

Arthur: (furious, his jaw tensed, but shows a serious blank face) I'm a man of my word, so I will let you leave. But if I see you again I'll have you flogged.

Merlin: (with a very fake smile) Thank you so much your highness, you are so kind. (bows in mockery again and leaves)

Time skip. In Gaius' chambers.

Gaius: (enters) How could you be so foolish?!

Merlin: (changing the baby's diapers) I don't know what you're talking about.

Gaius: Don't take me for a fool! Everyone is talking about how you humilliated the prince!

Merlin: (grins) Really?

Gaius: It's not funny. You could have gotten yourself in the dungeons again!

Merlin: He was the one who gave me permission to speak my mind! So I spoke my mind. I wouldn't have done it if he hadn't and he needed someone to tell him his truths. It's not my fault he can't handle them. (finishes to change the diapers) There you are! 🤗 (lifts her)

Baby: (babbles adorably)

Gaius: (sighs) I guess I should be glad you weren't idiotic enough to get into another fight with him or use magic to toss him around.

Merlin: Oh, I was tempted. A lot. (looks at the baby fondly) But, as you said, I can't afford acting like an idiot. I have a lot more to lose if I'm discovered. (his face turns sad) You don't know why we are like this, do you?

Gaius: (shakes his head sadly) No. I'm sorry. I'm afraid I don't possess that knowledge.

Merlin: (pauses) You know, I used to think I was a monster. For being the way I am. For so long I asked myself, why am I like this? Why would the Gods give me so much magic if I can't use it? What is my purpose in this world that rejects everything I am? Everytime my questions came without answers, I felt like dying.

Gaius: And now?

Merlin: (smiles fondly at the baby again) I'm holding the answers in my arms.

Time skip. In the Dragon's Cave. A deprived sleep Merlin enters.

Kilgharrah: Merlin! Until you finally answered my calls.

Merlin: (looks around for the owner of the voice, exhausted) Where are you?

Kilgharrah: (flies to land in front of Merlin) I'm here! How small you are for such a great-

Merlin: Oh, so you are the one who has been talking in my head in the middle of the night.

Kilgharrah: Indeed. As I was saying-

Merlin: I don't care what you have to say! 😡 You know how many hours I've been able to sleep these past few days?

Kilgharrah: (taken aback) Ehm...

Merlin: 3 HOURS! I can only sleep 3 hours a day, because if the baby is not crying, she is making some stuff fly or break! And if she is not making some stuff fly or break, she needs changing or cleaning! But it's okay because I have my 3 hours of sleep, my precious and sacred 3 hours of sleep. And when I finally, FINALLY find some time for my myself to have my fucking 3 hours of sleep, YOU! (points at Kilgharrah with a savage expression) INTERRUPT MY FUCKING SLEEP! 😤

Kilgharrah: ...

Merlin: So don't ever interrupt my beautiful 3 hours of sleep again or I'll make sure you are with the rest of the dragons very soon. (turns and leaves)

Kilgharrah: (watches as Merlin leaves in shock and then thinks) So there is a magic baby too? Interesting. Though I couldn't sense her (closes his eyes feeling the magic around him) And I still can't sense her. Interesting indeed.

Time skip. Next day. In Merlin's room.

Gaius: (enters Merlin's messy chamber and gathers his clothes) Oi!

Merlin: (wakes up) AH! The baby! (quickly turns to see the crib and relaxes once he sees the baby is fine)

Gaius: Have you seen the state of this room?

Merlin: (rubs his face, tired) It just happens.

Gaius: By magic? Or are you going to tell me it's the baby's fault?

Merlin: Well... (points the baby's crib where everything seems to float or move near it)

Gaius: ... It's the baby's fault.

Merlin: Yes. (yawns) And I haven't had time.

Gaius: Yeah. Well, I'll give you some time to clear it up (warns) without magic. And then I want you to get me some herbs: henbane, wormwood, and sorrel. And deliver this to Morgana. (gives him a small bag with a vial) The poor girl's suffering from nightmares, she can't hardly sleep... (gets a better look at Merlin) Although I think at this rate I'll have to make something for you too. You look terrible. (tosses some more clothes at Merlin and leaves)

Merlin: Mmm, can't hardly sleep? I know the feeling.

Time skip. In Morgana’s chambers.

Merlin: (enters the open door, eyes not really focus on anything, very sleep deprived)

Morgana: (as she walks behind her changing screen, looking just as exhausted as Merlin, but entertained by the conversation) You know, I've been thinking about Arthur. (yawns) I wouldn't touch him with a lance pole. Pass me that dress, will you Gwen?

Merlin: (pauses uncertainly before fetching the dress)

Morgana: (begins undressing) I mean, the man's a total jouster. And just because I'm the King's ward, that doesn't mean I have to accompany him to the feast, does it? (yawns trying to hide it)

Merlin: (yawns too, as quietly as he can, and places the gown on the screen with slow movements, not really paying attention cause he's so SO tired)

Morgana: Well, does it?

Merlin: (manages a high pitched yawn)

Morgana: I mean, If he wants me to go... Oh, Gwen, don't tell me I'm spreading you my yawns?

Merlin: (tries to figure a way out of this situation, but he yawns louder instead)

Morgana: I thought so. Well, as I was saying- (looks over the screen, spots Merlin and covers herself quickly, screaming) AAAAH!

Merlin: (blushes furiously, very embarrased, not knowing what to do or say) Uhm... 😳

Morgana: ... You are not Gwen.

Merlin: No. 😅

Gwen: (enters) I'm here.

Merlin: (turns to her)

Gwen: Are you here to drop off Lady Morgana's medicine?

Merlin: Yes! That's exactly why I'm here. I didn't mean to- (yawns) spy or-

Gwen: (smiles) It's fine. Leave it there. (points to a small table in the entryway) Thank you, although I think you should get some rest.

Merlin: (leaves the vial where Gwen indicated and turns to Morgana, head hung in shame) I'm so sorry. (leaves quickly)

Gwen: (helps Morgana behind the screen)

Morgana: (comes out from behind the screen in a new dress) Who was that?

Gwen: A new servant it seems, my lady. And a really tired one.

Time skip. In the Banquet Hall at night. Court members gather.

Gaius: (stands on one of the walls closest to the servants' door, looking around and grabbing some snacks to put in his pockets for Merlin)

Arthur: (joking around and laughing with his companions)

Morgana: (enters with her breathtaking dress, making every men stare at her)

Arthur: (Cursing internally) Gods have mercy. (goes to her)

Morgana: (smiles at him, inocently) Hi, Arthur.

Arthur: (protective brother mode) What is it that you are wearing?

Morgana: It's called a dress. You should try it some time.

Arthur: You know what I mean. Change it.

Morgana: Why?

Arthur: It's... too revealing!

Morgana: (laughs) Who are you to tell me what to wear?

Arthur: I'm the prince!

Morgana: A prince that got humiliated by a peasant boy yesterday.

Arthur: (Taken aback) Who...who told you that?

Morgana: Everyone is talking about it. And if you keep bothering me, I'll make sure no one forgets it. (passes him)

Arthur: (fumes, but lets her be)

Merlin: (appears through the servants' door, completely in a hurry and looking for Gaius in the crowd)

Gaius: (spots him) Merlin! (approaches) I thought you were with the baby? What happened?

Merlin: (very worried parent mode) She just fell asleep, but she hasn't stopped crying! It's not her diaper or her food or a bump, I checked. Maybe is a cold. Or worst! She could be dying-

Gaius: Calm down! It's probably just colic, it happens frequently to babies that age. I have several vials labeled for that in my cabinet. (checks that the prince hasn't seen Merlin, not wanting Merlin to get into trouble again) Now, leave before-

Celebratory horns signal King Uther's entrance and everyone present falls silent and still as they notice the king passing them. The servants' entrance is blocked by all the maidservants and manservants trying to leave so as not to interrupt the king.

Merlin: (stands still next to Gaius. Unable to leave)

Uther: We have enjoyed twenty years of peace and prosperity. It has brought the kingdom and myself many pleasures, but few can compare with the honour of introducing Lady Helen of Mora.

Applause. The music begins and Uther and the court take their seats. Merlin takes the opportunity to move through the servants who move to serve again, trying to remain unnoticed. However as he passes and Helen starts singing, Merlin notices the members of the court begin to fall asleep. Merlin covers his ears with his hands as cobwebs begin to form over the enchanted sleepers.

Merlin: (thinking, confused and scared) What... what is happening?

Lady Helen: (stares at Arthur as she walks forward and then pulls a dagger from her sleeve)

Merlin: (thinking) Wait... She wants to kill the idiot! 😱 I get the feeling, but it's wrong! Oh, what do I do, what do I do... (spots the chandelier) That's it! (magically drops the chandelier on her as she raises her arm to throw the dagger)

Court members: (wake and pull the cobwebs off, muttering, confused)

Uther and Arthur: (just as confused, stand up to see Lady Helen, now Mary Collins, lying on the floor)

Merlin: (thinking) Oh, shit. Did I kill her?

Mary Collins: (suddenly raises herself up enough to throw the dagger at Arthur)

Merlin: (slows down time instinctively to reach Arthur and pull him out of harm's way)

The dagger slices into Arthur's chair as Arthur and Merlin fall to the floor.

Mary Collins: (gives her last breath and dies)

Arthur and Merlin: (stand up)

Arthur: (thinking) What the hell is he doing here?

Uther: You saved my boy's life. A debt must be repaid.

Merlin: Oh, well. I don't really need-

Uther: Don't be so modest. You shall be rewarded.

Merlin: No, honestly, you don't have to, Your Majesty. (tries to leave)

Uther: (stops him by the arm) No, absolutely. This merits something quite special.

Merlin: Well, if you insist. (thinking) I guess some money wouldn't hurt to buy some things for the baby. Just, please hurry, she'll wake up at any moment!

Uther: You shall be rewarded a position in the royal household. You shall be Prince Arthur's manservant.

The Court: (applauds)

Arthur: (complains in a whisper) Father!

Uther: (ignores him)

Gaius: (tries to approach, but the number of people standing up and approaching the King and the young men is such that it is impossible for him to even object from his position)

Gwen: (claps with a pitying smile on her face, knowing what awaits Merlin at his new job)

Arthur and Merlin: (look away from each other, completely irritated)

Time skip. In Merlin's room. The baby seems not to have woken up, but everything that is close to her levitates. Merlin, completely exhausted, tries to put everything back in its place, but again some things float or start to roll.

Gaius: (knocks on the door and enters) You seem to be a hero.

Merlin: With a shitty reward. (gives up on putting the things back to place and sighs) Can I resign?

Gaius: No. Once Uther has something in mind it's impossible for anyone to oppose him. His word is law, remember?

Merlin: But... We had not planned for me to stay.

Gaius: And now, it seems you'll be here for an unlimited time. And even if I find a camp right now, it's unlikely I'll be able to get you and the baby accepted. I wouldn't worry too much though. It's a relatively easy job to do. And a short term one too.

Merlin: What do you mean?

Gaius: Servants who are dedicated to the prince's care don't usually last very long. He'll probably sack you soon. All you have to do is avoid getting into trouble with the prince and serve him-

Merlin: (worried) Oh no! I can't do that!

Gaius: Be with the prince? It's just following him around all day… (realises) oh, the baby.

Merlin: (sighs) I can't leave her alone, but I can't have her with me all the time either. Or can I?

Gaius: It's been a long time since anyone had a baby in the castle. And almost all the children are already teenagers of the servants or maids. Don't worry, I'll help you with her. (hands Merlin a book wrapped in a cloth) This book was given to me when I was your age, but I have a feeling it will be of more use to you than it was to me.

Merlin: (opens it and looks inside) This is a book of magic! I thought the king had destroyed everything related to magic.

Gaius: He kept a dragon alive, a magic book that pretends to be an herbalist's book won't kill anyone. Not if you are careful that is. Keep it hidden and then take it with you when you go with the baby to the druid camp.

Merlin: (smiles) Thank you, Gaius. I will study every word.

Guard: (knocks from outside, pretending not to notice the baby bottles in the room) Merlin, Prince Arthur needs you immediately.

Gaius: Well, you'd better find out what he wants.

BASED ON THIS PROMPT >> PREVIOUS PART >> NEXT PART

...

So Arthur and Merlin had an even rockier start this time. How do you think this will affect their relationship?

Tagging @chaosofbelievers , @blackgigglypuff , @stressed-but-chill , @nocheaseforyougoodsir , @thedragonlies , @evedaser , @lolazoel , @sammythetoaster , @caraspud , @g00pygunkyguy , @bertoliosis35-blog , @purpuraffe , @lordemryspendragon , @herstarlight , @justaz , @myalchemicalgnomace , @haunted-glassesgurl , @exmintha , @dumbdemjin , @a-line-drawn , @itsjustmeandmyanxiety , @beebsnas , @rem-the-moth , @tmarauder101

#bbc merlin #merlin bbc #merlin #merthur #merlin prompt #merlin fanfic #merlin fic #merthur prompt #merthur fic #Merlin arrives with a baby in Camelot AU

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organic-bloodbath · 1 day ago

Text

Knife Princess – Part 6

Chishiya x Reader

Summary: You and Chishiya get trapped in a closed space together, both of you getting strange flashbacks.

Warnings: Claustrophobia, panic attack.

A/N: I didn't plan to write this so fast but i just blacked out when i started writing it.

Chapters

♤♡♧◇

Niragi's friend, Jae-sung, gave you a place to stay for a while until you'd find your own place. It was rather small apartment, but you and Niragi got the room which belonged to Jae-sung's roommate, who apparently would be visiting his in-laws in Korea for three weeks. Or something like that. You and Niragi would have about two weeks to find another place to stay the night.

The room had one single bed, so you slept on it and Niragi would have a mattress on the floor, being the usual gentleman he always was (not). You didn't personally know Jae-sung, but by the first impression you got from him, he seemed nice enough. Not anything like Niragi atleast, but what did you know.

For the first few days you didn't do much else than rest and go for a walk. You met up with couple of your friends, who luckily had been out of Tokyo that significant day. You didn't keep regular contact with them anymore, all of you having your own lives, but hey had immediately reached out to you when they heard you had been one of the victims.

Your boss had given you two weeks to rest and recover, which was more than you were prepared to have. You worked an office job as a graphic designer so you could have easily started the job sooner since you weren't physically restricted to work which was mostly sitting around. But your boss didn't want to take chances on your wounds suddenly getting worse in the middle of a work day. You knew you'd get bored after a few more days, since your social life was overall extremely dry as well.

You had decided to go to the grocery store nearby, craving for something sweet. Cookies, ice cream, chocolate – probably all of them.

You arrived back inside the building, carrying a bag full of groceries with you. You decided to walk up the stairs, your eyes on the screen of your phone, typing a text to your friend. You would have taken the elevator, but it was all the way up on the 9th floor so you'd rather walk up, getting a little exercise too.

But you didn't manage to reach the stairs at all when you crashed on someone's chest, stumbling back but managed to keep your balance. Although, the crash made you drop the bag on the floor by your feet, spilling some of the items out, making you curse under your breath.

You looked up and saw a familiar face in front of you. Well, not exactly familiar, but a face which you'd seen before not long ago.

"We should stop crashing on each other like this," the guy suggested, slight smirk on his face. The same guy who was at the hospital and fell on you the first time you met him.

"What are you doing here?" you asked, furrowing your eyebrows, and kneeled down on the floor, bare knee touching the cold ground. You started collecting the packages back into the plastic bag.

"Well, i happen to live here," he answered and lowered himself to your level to help you gather the items. "I haven't seen you here before."

"Might be because i haven't been here more than a few days by far. It's just for couple of weeks," you said, making eye contact with him as you stood back up. A small smile appeared on your lips, though you weren't sure if he noticed it. "Don't worry, then i'll be out of your way."

"Your home got destroyed, huh?"

"Pretty much, yeah."

"I'm sorry to hear that," he said, a genuine apologetic look on his face. You didn't want strangers to be sorry for you, but now you kind of appreciated that, surprisingly.

"Thanks," you said quietly and started to leave, walking past him back towards the stairs, like your original intention had been. "Well, i'll be seeing you then, i suppose."

"See you." He was watching after you for a moment, until he spotted something on the floor by his feet. "Hey, Y/N?" the guy shouted after you, making you turn around.

You furrowed your eyebrows as he approached you again.

"You, um, dropped this," he said and handed you a cookie, but you didn't immediately grab it.

"How do you know my name?" you asked, narrowing your eyes.

He fell silent for a moment, not knowing the answer himself. It had come out of his mouth so naturally he didn't know what to respond. Like he had always known it without needing to ask about it. It had only appeared in his mind just by looking at you.

"Uh, i probably overheard it when you were talking with your brother," he figured out. "Not that i meant to eavesdrop." Maybe he had overheard it but just forgot when it happened? He had always had a good short-term memory and would certainly remember where he had learned your name. Especially since he hadn't known you long at all.

But he didn't remember the reason. No matter how hard he tried to think, he couldn't grasp why he knew it.

"Hm, i guess," you mumbled, feeling suspicious. He was still handing you the cracker.

Stuff these into your pockets, your voice said when you grabbed the cracker into your hand from his hold.

"What?" he asked.

"What what?" you asked.

"What did you say?"

"Um, i didn't say anything," you denied.

He went silent for a moment, just looking at you in your eyes.

"You're a strange man, you know that?"

"So i've heard," he smiled. "I'm Chishiya, by the way."

"Nice to meet you, Chishiya," you smiled.

Your smile made his heart flutter and twist his stomach in knots.

You were gone before he could say anything else. Chishiya didn't know how long he kept standing there after you had left, but it took him a while to get himself together and continue his way back to his apartment.

♤♡♧◇

Two days later, you had gone to a library to read for couple of hours, not wanting to stay in Jae-sung's small apartment the entire day. You had visited this library once in a while when you were younger, but hadn't been here in a long time, not after you moved further away from here. Now, you had taken a comfortable position on a couch which was usually taken but was now available to sit.

After a while, someone approached you. You looked up, your heart starting to beat faster when he looked at you.

"Y/N?" the man asked, furrowing his eyebrows but then his eyes brightening. "Hi, how are you doing?"

Your throat felt dry when your one-night hookup was looking down at you.

"Um, fine," you mumbled.

"May i sit?" he asked, pointing the spot next to you on the couch. You only stared at him for a while, until slightly nodded. "What have you been up to?"

"You lied to me," you said quietly, not able to start doing any small talk with him. You weren't going to cause a scene in a damn library but you weren't going to pretend acting friendly either.

"Lied about what?" he asked, genuinely confused. He had seemed to be in a good mood before he approached you, but now it started to fade when he saw the unwelcoming look on your face.

"That we slept together," you gritted between your teeth.

"Um, i already told you," he said. "Nothing happened. For real."

"Okay, so how am i pregnant then?" you spat, anger starting to boil inside you.

His eyes widened. "You're pregnant?"

You crossed your arms against your chest, leaning back against the couch. "Yes, thanks to you."

"I swear, Y/N, we didn't do anything after you told me to stop," he insisted, starting to panic. "I remember it well enough to know that we did stop. After you passed out i simply went to the shower and then fell asleep next to you, okay?"

You eyed him for a moment. He seemed genuine, truly meaning every word, but you weren't buying it. Just because there was simply no other way how you could have become pregnant. If you weren't bearing a child inside you, you might have actually believed him.

"I swear through my mother's grave, hand on my heart, that i did nothing to you. I'd say it directly in front of God," he promised, starting to be desperate, seeing the look on your face – both hurt and angry. He could tell that you weren't so sure to trust him. "Can't you take, like, a paternity test or something if you don't believe me? It's not mine, i promise."

God, how much you wanted to believe him. He looked so serious and genuine it was hard to blame him on things you didn't even remember.

The moments you remembered with him, he had been gentle with you and asked for final permission on everything. When you had said 'no', he had let you go.

"Please," he pleaded. "I did nothing to you. I don't sleep with unconscious women, no matter how wasted i am."

You shut your eyes and held your forehead. How could you believe him when there had been literally nobody else than him?

"I, i came to talk to you now because you forgot a few things in my apartment that day," he said. "I thought i could meet up with you later so i could return them. You just never left your number so i couldn't reach you."

You did forget some of your things in his place but had just accepted the fact that you'd never see them again.

"You can keep them."

"We don't need to hang out, i can just-"

"Keep them, okay?" you insisted and got up from the couch, leaving him to sit by himself without another word.

♤♡♧◇

On your way home, you tried your best to calm down your racing heart and keep your breath steady, but it was turning out to become challenging. You wouldn't be about to cry in public. All you wanted to do now was scream, but you couldn't do that either at a bus stop.

You had promised Niragi to be back at the apartment in about 15 minutes because he wanted to introduce you to his friends and be social, since all you did right now was mostly staying by yourself.

The elevator in this building was ancient and looked like it could break any time soon. The sound of the floor creaking under your feet with every step didn't make you feel very safe either. Still, you stepped into the elevator, pressing the button to the 6th floor, not having the energy to walk all the way up there.

The door started to slowly close until someone's foot stopped it and opened the door again, letting the person to the elevator as well. You locked eyes with Chishiya.

"You're literally stalking me," you stated as he came to stand next to you. It wasn't a big elevator at all, it was made to fit to exactly four people. Three if you wanted to move a little and not only stand with your arms touching each other, not able to take a step to any direction without stepping on someone's foot.

"We live in the same building," he pointed out.

"And yet i haven't bumped into any other neighbor except you and someone's grandma. You now twice," you said back.

"I suppose we have similar daily routines," he responded.

"Mhm," you said, lifting your left eyebrow and turning away from him.

He was going to the 7th floor, only one floor above you. You didn't speak anything, just stood next to each other in silence, an inch between your shoulders. You felt awkward, but didn't care to start even more awkward small-talk.

You were on the 4th floor, when suddenly the elevator stopped, so hard as if it had hit a wall, making you almost lose your balance.

"What the hell?" you mumbled. The doors didn't open and you assumed you were between two floors. Anyway not able to get out.

You suffered from claustrophobia and being trapped in a small space with no way to get out was one of your worst fears. You had never been a fan of elevators, but you had gotten used to them, as long as you didn't have to stay in one for a long time.

You started breathing more rapidly, feeling like the air was running out and you were going to suffocate. The elevator started shrinking, the walls coming closer to you. Chishiya looked at you, worried look on his face.

"Hey, are you okay?" he asked softly.

You didn't answer, you were too caught up in the panic attack that was about to start. Your hands were shaking and you just really, really needed to get out of this elevator, starting to hyperventilate. You felt pain on your chest, pressing your trembling hand against your racing heart.

He put his hands on your shoulders, turning you towards him. You avoided eye contact with him at first, looking at the wall over his shoulder.

"Hey, hey," Chishiya said, realising what was going on. "Look at me. Y/N, look at me."

You turned your face towards him, allowing yourself to make eye contact with him.

"Take a deep breath in a count of three, okay?"

Your eyes started to water as you looked at him, having a really hard time to take deep breaths and calm down. You tried your hardest, his hands gently rubbing your arms. Eventually you were able to calm down.

"That's good," Chishiya smiled. "You did really good."

"Is it weird if i hug you?" you asked quietly, nervous for his rejection or making him uncomfortable. Chishiya contemplated your request a little bit, until gently wrapped your arms around you, massaging your back with his hand.

Another person's presence and touch always, or most times, managed to calm you down properly. You heard his steady heart beat.

Was there someone else? Or was i... was i your only one?

You pulled away from him, furrowing your eyebrows when you looked at him in his eyes. "What do you mean someone else? We're alone here."

"I didn't say anything about someone else," Chishiya mumbled, furrowing his brows too.

"Yes you did, i heard you," you insisted.

You were always really embarrassed when someone saw you have a panic attack and you could feel your cheeks burning up this time as well, now that you had properly recovered from it and realized the entire situation.

"We've been trapped in this elevator for barely ten minutes and you already start to hallucinate," Chishiya stated. He sounded serious, but the small smile on his lips gave it away, wanting to cheer you up and lighten your mood.

"Shut up," you mumbled and hit his shoulder, his words making you a little amused as well.

"I'm going to make a call to get this thing fixed and us out of here. You okay now?" he asked and after you nodded, he took his phone from his pocket and dialed the correct number.

You were afraid of getting another panic attack if you had to be here for a long time, you didn't want to go through that again in such a short time. At least i'm not alone here, you thought. Right now, you were more than glad that he had put his foot between the door and stepped inside with you, even though it had been awkward at first.

"Alright, they said they'll be here as soon as possible, but it might take a while to get this running again," Chishiya explained turning to look back at you.''

"Amazing," you huffed.

"Hey, it could be worse," he pointed out.

"Mhm, and how exactly?" you asked, crossing your arms against your chest.

"Well, you could be stuck with one old man from the 2nd floor, who doesn't shut up about facts about toilets and bicycles," he answered.

"Toilets and bicycles?" you huffed.

"Yup. So, be glad it's me and not an even stranger man than me."

You looked at him for a moment, until you narrowed your eyes, looking again directly at him. "You sabotaged this thing, didn't you?" You widened your eyes and pointed a finger at him. "I knew you had been flirting with me at the hospital!"

"Hey, even if i wanted to get to know you better i wouldn't go to the length of trapping you in a small space with me," he swore, one hand on his heart and the other up in the air.

"Mhm," you hummed, crossing your arms. Then, you pouted a little, pretending to be upset and tilted your head. "So, you don't want to get to know me better? At all?"

You were incredibly close to each other, a few inches between your bodies.

"Well," he said slowly, glancing at the ceiling for a moment to avoid your intense gaze. "I didn't say that."

"But you implied it."

"You're putting words into my mouth," he stated when he had locked eyes with you again.

He wasn't matching your 'i'm just joking' vibe at all right now.

You eyed him up and down, starting to grin. "You're kind of cute, you know that?"

"Cute?" he repeated, raising his eyebrows.

"Yup," you confirmed and bit your lip. "Nobody told you that before?"

"Hm, not that i recall." You smiled wider when you noticed his cheeks turn slightly pink.

"So, you figured out already where you know me?" you asked.

He narrowed his eyes. "You admit that we've met?"

"No," you said. "Other strangers just haven't thought before we might know each other – without considering it flirting."

"Well, i haven't found an answer to that yet," he admitted.

"Hm. Well, let me know when you do."

Your phone let a sound of a new text message, making you take your phone from your pocket. You were feeling hot and pulled your sleeves up to your elbows as you took the phone in your hand.

Assface: are you still out? we're running out of beer

When you had exposed half of your arms, the tattoo on your arm was revealed – two knives crossed with each other, surrounded by roses and couple of skulls. It picked Chishiya's attention, making him analyse it with his eyes.

I didn't find a pen and paper. And i'm bored.

Chishiya looked at your face when he heard those words, your lips not moving at all. Not letting out a single syllable. He could swear that he hadn't imagined those words, spoken by your voice in his head, by himself.

I have a second knife, you know.

You turned your face towards Chishiya when he had fallen quiet, noticing his concentrated stare on your lips.

"What, you want to make out?" you asked with a playful smile, then biting your lip.

You put your phone away and backed him against the wall, standing barely an inch away from him, playing with the collar of his shirt.

"We can play 7 minutes in heaven if you want, now that we have enough time to spare."

Chishiya's face turned red, eyes widening. He swallowed the lump in his throat, stomach feeling funny. His usual calm demeanor shifted completely to something else he had very rarely experienced before. Probably never before. He shook his head a little to get a grip of himself.

"Oh, no, i didn't-"

"I'm just kidding," you giggled, enjoying what kind of effect you managed to have on him. "But it's okay, Chishiya, i know i'm pretty," you grinned and put your finger on his chin. "You can admit it."

"I'm not denying that you're pretty but i wasn't thinking of kissing you," he stated as seriously as he could but even he could tell his voice was trembling a little. "I was just, looking at your tattoo."

"My tattoo is on my arm, not on my lips," you hummed, then started to smile. "So you think i am pretty, hm?"

"Will you shut up about that if i say yes?" he asked, resting his head against the wall.

"Maybe, no promises though," you shrugged. "Well?"

"Fine, you're pretty," he admitted. "Now, end of discussion."

You just smiled, turning into pouting right after. "So, no kissing, hm?"

He couldn't help but glance at your lips but then he cleared his throat. "No kissing."

"Fine," you huffed, acting all disappointed even though you were just teasing him, and backed away from him. You sat on the floor, back against the wall, Chishiya sitting down next to you.

"Can i ask you a serious question?" he asked, the tone of his voice to a lot more serious one, he was back at his normal self. You listened to him now with closer attention. "Do you feel any different after the accident?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like," Chishiya started, trying to gather his words together to make sense. "I feel like there's a large piece missing inside me, you know?" You furrowed your eyebrows. "I don't know if that sounds dumb, but-"

"It's not dumb," you interrupted. "I do feel like that too."

"You do?" he asked, lifting his eyebrows in surprise.

"I mean, kind of yeah," you admitted, hugging your knees against your chest. "I feel weird. Like there's something crucial i don't remember. I can't really explain it. But i've just figured it's due some survivor's guilt and trauma or whatever, i don't know. I'm just trying to leave the entire thing behind."

Chishiya knew, was absolutely sure, that it was something else than simply survivor's guilt.

"Perhaps," he mumbled and looked into his hands on his lap.

You didn't know how much time passed the two of you being trapped in the elevator, but you'd guess it was anything between 30 minutes to one hour.

Suddenly, the elevator started to move again, startling you so badly that you collapsed against Chishiya, grabbing his shirt on an instinct.

He looked at you, hanging on him, until you turned your head towards his gaze, eyes widening.

"I'm sorry," you apologised, letting him go. "I just got really startled."

"It's alright."

Chishiya stood up and took your hand in his, pulling you up from the floor just as the elevator's door opened.

"Well, i guess this is my stop," you announced, suddenly feeling a bit awkward again, just like the moment in the beginning when Chishiya had stepped into this elevator. "See you around, Chishiya."

"See you around, Y/N."

♤♡♧◇

You walked inside the apartment, Niragi and two of his friends sitting at the table, playing cards together and drinking beer. Apparently they had found more beer somewhere after all.

"What took you so long?" Niragi asked, clearly not pleased for having to wait for you so long. "Did you bring more beer?"

"Got stuck inside the elevator," you stated. "So, no. I didn't."

"That shit finally broke?" Jae-sung asked and let out a laugh. "Took long enough."

"Join us, we saved a seat for you," Niragi invited, patting the chair next to him.

"Oh, i think i'll just go to read and-"

"Don't be silly, one game," another guy pleaded, you had never seen him before.

You rolled your eyes and sighed. "Fine, one game."

But one game turned into another and yet another, until it started to get really late. You were having a lot of fun, though, and you managed to win surprisingly often, shocking the guys a little because they had thought of being some sort of masters in card games themselves. Niragi knew you were a challenging opponent though, so he was amused by the reactions of his friends.

You now held the King of Spades card in your hand, looking at the King's cartoon face and felt it staring back at you, a little too intensely. You got a weird twist in your stomach, suddenly feeling sick.

Uncomfortable pressure formed inside your skull, some sort of flashes running inside your mind. The card dropped from your hand as you held your head in your hands, shutting your eyes.

You heard rapid shooting and screaming everywhere around you.

A man in a long black cloak approached you, pointing his gun at you, but someone pulled you out of the way of gunfire.

Swimming in a lake, being held against someone's bare chest but not seeing the person's face. An explosion somewhere in the distance.

Finally, Chishiya's face looking at you with worried eyes, a tear falling down his face and blood on his cheek. Saying something to you but you didn't hear what.

Every flash didn't last longer than one or two seconds, feeling like they were splitting your brain in half.

You felt a hand on your shoulder, Niragi looking at you with a worried expression on his face. You jumped on your seat, him scaring the crap out of you.

"Y/N? What's wrong?" Niragi asked.

"My, my head just hurts," you muttered and stood up. "Migraine. I think i'll go to lie down." You were already walking away until turned around one more time and gave the guys a smile. "It was nice to play with all of you though."

You went to the spare room and sat on the bed, hands grabbing the edge of the bed.

What the hell was that?

♤♡♧◇

Chishiya fell asleep fast that night, faster than usual, even though his mind wasn't even closely free from all the storming thoughts about you and everything going on in his life right now.

He saw a dream which felt too real and familiar to be only a dream. He felt like there had been more to the dream, and he remembered only a small part of it.

He saw your face. You were standing in front of him. With a smile on your face, you pulled him into a kiss, hands on his cheeks.

You pulled back after a while, still holding his cheeks as you looked into his eyes, challenging look in them. "I've never done it in a lake, though."

Chishiya woke up, for a moment trying to comprehend where he was after opening his eyes, then fully realizing he had only dreamed the entire thing. You weren't there holding his face. You weren't there kissing his lips. You weren't there at all, your touch had been only his own imagination.

Had the moment between you two in the elevator really affected him that much? Surely not. No, definitely not.

His heart fluttered and for some reason, he had liked it. The idea of you being close to him.

He wanted to slap himself on the cheek which held a ghost of your touch, just to get this feeling spat out of him. Touch which hadn't been there at all in the first place.

He didn't know you. You were strangers to each other who simply went through the same trauma. He had never felt like this about a woman who he only knew by a name. He knew nothing else about you besides getting injured when the meteorite hit Tokyo.

He could tell you were beautiful and would get any man on their knees by your feet, he wasn't going to deny that.

Was this some sort of "love at first sight" moment he was experiencing? Definitely not. He didn't believe in love at first sight, no. It had to be something else.

Chishiya groaned, absolutely frustrated, and wasn't able to sleep anymore.

♤♡♧◇

A/N: Hope i didn't forget to tag anyone <3 The next part won't be posted this fast lmao don't get used to this.

Taglist:

@audiiix

@valexqpt

@spencersoneball

@queenofviolenceandnerds

@moonchild323232

@lizxoxeth

@crazzzyyyy

@kimsrie

#alice in borderland x reader #aib imagine #alice in borderland imagine #aib chishiya #chishiya alice in borderland #chishiya imagine #chishiya shuntaro #chishiya x reader #shuntaro chishiya

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scorpio1205 · 2 days ago

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Daddy Issues (Trigger warning!)

Summary: 16 year old Bambi is having a hard time and needs comfort (This is set before Matt and Bambi are together)

Warnings: swearing, crying, pushing, daddy issues, Bambi opening up, absent dad, breakdowns, and slight fluff

It had been two days since the triplets had heard from Bambi, which was completely out of the ordinary. Bambi was someone who always texted back immediately even if she was upset. It's just who she was, she never wanted someone to think she was ignoring or mad at them.

Bambi had started talking to her father again and things seemed to be going well..... Well that was the last thing the triplets had been told about it.

Matt was sitting in the kitchen eating a bowl of cereal when Mary Lou walked into the kitchen on the phone. She had a more somber look on her face which made Matt sit up.

"What happened?"

Mary Lou shushed him nodding to what whoever she was on the phone with said closing her eyes with a soft sigh "Alright, I'll tell them to stop by." She put her phone down sadly turning to Matt slowly. The look in her face was something he's never seen before.

"Mom. what's wrong?"

"Where are your brothers?" She whispered softly.

"Out with Nate and Madi. Why?"

"Bambi.... Bambi isn't doing too well right now.... She locked herself in her room, she won't talk to anyone-"

Matt immediately stood up putting his bowl in the sink and grabbing the car keys not giving Mary Lou a moment to finish speaking as he rushed out the door.

He was beating himself up mentally. He should've known something was up when he texted her and she didn't respond to him. He needed to get to Bambi.

Bambi was laying curled up in her bed, the song Good Enough from the show empire playing through her room on repeat. She hadn't moved in two days. God, how could she be so stupid. It was the same cycle and each time she believed it would be different.

She knew better, she always knew better. She wanted... no she needed to believe things would be different. But they never were.

As the song restarted her door opened but she didn't move assuming it was her mom again.

"Bambi....." Matt spoke softly closing the door behind him before walking over to her.

She looked at him through the darkness of her room before laying her head back on her pillow. "Go away, Matty."

"L-listen.. I know I'm not Nick or Chris....But I can still be here for you..." Matt walked closer to the bed trying to figure out how to get her to talk to him, how to get her to open up.

She sat up looking at him. "Matt-"

"No. No. I know you're upset. but you don't get to do that." He turned on her light. "I'm one of your best friends. I love you and you don't get to shut me out when I know you need me the most."

"Why can't you just leave me alone!" She stood up and snapped at him , though you could tell by the look in her eyes that she was gonna break

He looked at her trying not to take it personal, he knew she was hurting and that before she got sad she got angry. That's just how she handled her emotions. It's how she coped with her feelings, especially when it came to her father. "Just talk to me" He whispered moving closer to her.

She pushed him away from her "Go home, Matty"

He stumbled back a bit but stood his ground "No."

"Go" She began to shake slightly but not out of anger, she was about to crumble and he can tell.

"Bambi." He whispered taking her wrist into his hand and pulling "I love you....Please talk to me."

Her lip began to quiver uncontrollably "Why.... Why doesn't he love me?" A sob broke through immediately hiding her face into his chest.

Matt's heart broke immediately wrapping his arms around her. "I-I don't know, Bam."

"What's so wrong with me that he can't just stay." She sobbed, "W-why am I not good enough for him"

"You aren't the problem." He whispered softly. "He is a terrible, awful human being. You.... You're perfect." He moved the to sit down on her bed.

She got really quiet for a moment. "Don't leave me, Matty."

He looked her in the eyes, his thumb gently wiping away her tears "I'd never leave you....."

She nodded pulling him to lay down with her. Once he was laying next to her, she moved into his side pulling her quilt over them.

His arms moved around her resting his chin on her head, closing his eyes and taking in her scent. She smelled like hot chocolate and a bit of weed. "you smell like weed." He mumbled with a small smile.

"Stole some from my mom" She mumbled.

He snickered "I'm not surprised"

After about 10 minutes of silence she spoke. ".....He's mad that I don't always text him first."

"What?"

"My dad..... He hadn't texted in like 2 weeks.... So I called him and told him that it upset me that he hadn't texted me, that I thought we were working on building a relationship.... that he said he wanted to get to know me...... And in order to get to know me he has to text me.... Apparently that upset him cause he started to yell at me, he told me that the phone works both ways and that I shouldn't act like a child...."

Matt's jaw clenched hearing this. Every time he heard about Bambi's father he was tempted to fly down to New York and kick his ass himself.

"That upset me so I started to yell at him, because I am a child....I'm his child and he knows nothing about me.... He can't tell me my favorite color, o-or what my favorite food is.... He doesn't know my allergies..... That I'm surprised he even knows my birthday or that people call me Bambi.... He only remembers he has a kid when he has a new girlfriend and she wants to meet me or around the holidays. He's barely my father he's a sperm donor who my mom should've put on child support." She rambled her eyes still filled with tears, but they were no longer sad tears, they were angry tears.

Matt scoffed. "He's such a fucking dick."

"Then he started talking shit about my mom. Said that she was the reason I felt that way... And that when I can finally form my own opinion on him to give him a call, then he hung up on me."

"You deserve better, Bam. I doesn't deserve you." Matt whispered kissing her head.

She nodded softly clinging to him her eyes closing in emotional exhaustion which Matt noticed and let her go to sleep before leaning down and whispering "You are the strongest most beautiful girl in the world... And if he can't see that. Then he isn't worth the tears you waste crying over him. I love you more than you'd ever know."

@sturnmeovr @big-poppa23 @colorthecosmos444 @sturns-mermaid @mattsstarlet @iammattswife @pinksturns @courta13 @conspiracy-ash @middlepartmatt @raesturns @mattscherries @emely9274 @harls-sturn @loser41ifee @trevorsgodmother @ivysturnss @tezzzzzzzz

Dividers By @bernardsbendystraws

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muniemimi · 2 hours ago

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I HAD A VISION OK. ehem excuse my ugly grammar, to anyone who comes across this post, hope you like it:33 (also love the art)

Huff! And there we go, last sack of orchid seeds to organize. "That was a pretty heavy An, I'm glad you called me over before Ken-san would see you lifting and scold me for letting his precious daughter get tired." The sun continues to direct its blaze at our little flower shop managed by my coworker, and singing partners, dad. Along with the light, the winds blow a warm breeze past us, balancing the temperature. The air smelt of wet soil and the mix of fragrance from different flowers we had just finished arranging just now spread. An hour from now, we're able to go back to the 'Weekend Cottage' where me and An usually practice with the supervision and guidance of Ken-san to take a short break before we go back to watch the shop and tend to our costumers.

"Akito.. don't inhale the pancakes at our break later.. leave some for Kohane-chan! She promised me shes coming back today! I'm planning to give her some too while I teach her bout' our shop."

"Aah enough with this lovestruck manners! Alright, alright fine, I won't."

I was already planning to hide the snacks for myself since earlier.. How'd she know I'd do it again? As expected of my close friend. For now I'll just slouch behind the counter and wait for time to pass by more quickly. Hurriedly, I focused my eyes on the lovely combination of petals infront of me. Chrysanthemums. The symbol of longevity and love. The way those countless petals curl to the middle of flower, focused on the most noticeable feature, the core. It was the way I have learned this flower had different colors too. My favorite. And it also happens that, that same plant represented my birth month. From the moment I had learned to walk, I had run across fields of flowers to which it seemed to be endless, and only one seemed to stop my being. It was as if it had poison, an antidote that could make me behave and listen. Since then I have kept chrysanthemums where I can see them, to watch them grow. Slowly, the clock slowly swings its arm around. While I intently adore the plants I have bloomed, an unfamiliar sound snatched my attention.

SNAP!

A stem. My stem of sunflowers. I can faintly hear new steps from my side of the counter. An was in the greenhouse, sprinkling the shrubs I assume. I don't need to worry about that right now, I have to focus on who is suspiciously, threading lightly on a completely normal flower shop, if not a shopper. It can't be strays.. I've carefully fended them off and guided them away from the store so the plants wouldn't be disturbed. Or maybe I missed a few pups running around? Damn.. I should've just asked for help from An to drive away the dogs. I still can't seem to get used to getting close to them.. Our windows are tinted with translucent glass so it's pretty hard to see what was it that was rustling outside, so I need to check it out myself.

I warily walk towards the wood door. It opens with no sound emitted, and I continue to inspect my surroundings, to find any movement, none. When I tilt my head to peek at the side I heard the snap, there was no one, nor no animal. What was visible was a sunflower that seemed to be trampled on the stem, but the flower itself didn't seem to be crushed. I hum to myself proudly to know that it really was a sunflower, glad to know I still know my own buds. Before I took another step to make sure no one was there, I call out a greeting, waiting for somebody to respond,

"..Hello?"

And then I squat down to pick up the mangled handle of the wide flower. I got up from my knees, hearing the faint tapping of shoes behind me. I had thought it was An running towards here to call me back to watch the counter. It felt so similar to the sandals the star-clipped girl always wore when working.

"Oh hey An, back from watering the plants so fast? Did you come here to ask me to come to the front desk? Don't worry about it, I just checked if there was someone here, it was probably just a stray dog I missed when I was shooing them away. Hah.. they stepped on my sunflower.. Anyway, do you mind if you take thi--"

CLICK!

!!!

A..ah.. something clicks.

I turn around in hopes the sunflower in my hand would be met with the bright, familiar face of my coworker only for it to be met with a.. gun..? Gun? Here? In this quiet, unknown town? Slowly trembling out of nervousness, I thought, I won't be able to defend myself if I attacked suddenly. They have a gun for heavens sake!

I can't quite see who was holding the weapon, only the hair of the individual being the first thing I notice. It was the combination of two seperate colors. It was a pale, muted baby blue on the left and a more dark, navy blue on the right. Was it a natural hair color they were born with? I can't help but stare at the odd mix of pigments. It strongly reminded me of orchids gathered with hyacinths and delphiniums in a bouquet, and was getting distracted by the fact a deadly weapon was still being pointed at my temple! I try my best to whisper a sentence without seemingly wanting to provoke the figure infront of me. Still poorly gripping the flower I had in my palm since earlier, visibly shaking and terrified.

"..Your wound."

".. ..?

..What..?"

(english seriously aint my first language, anyways I love akitoya)

mama im in love with a criminallll

#project sekai #prosekai #prjsk #prsk #akitoya #akito shinonome #toya aoyagi #fanfic #should i continue?#very sigma

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ssentimentals · 3 days ago

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nini hii!! i just saw your prompts list rn and can i request for prompt no. 55 with vernon and reader? i really really enjoy reading your works 🫶🏼 thank you so muchhhh 🩷

hihi love! aw, i'm glad you're loving my works and of course you can request it, thank you for doing so! 💜

prompt: mutual pining (+ oblivious)

'it's alright, vernon. i don't want to keep you from having fun,' you try to smile but it comes out more like a grimace. 'i'll be alright here.'

vernon ignores you, waving to all your friends, who hurry for the safari tour. the one where you would've also gone if you didn't trip and twist your ankle. the one where vernon could've easily gone but for some reason he chose to stay with you. it's- sweet. incredibly so. it's also very confusing and very, very bad for all the butterflies inside your stomach because you really can't give them any hope, you can't let them think even for a second that vernon might like you back.

'just a sec,' he goes to another sofa and snatches two pillows from it. 'i read that we need to keep your foot elevated, so..' carefully, like he's holding something precious, vernon places your leg on top of the pillow, looking at you with his big bambi eyes to check if it's aright. 'it's good like this? i can add one more pillow if you want.'

'no, it's good.'

you're desperately trying not to think of vernon reading on google about twisted ankles and how to treat them. he's doing this because he's nice and that's what nice people do, right? but all your friends are gone, your mind supplies, all of them are gone but he stayed. with the way you're sitting, you have a perfect view on the kitchen, where vernon diligently prepares ice for your ankle. it hurts but pain is rather dull due to medication they gave you at the hospital; what hurts you more is ruining vernon's holiday. 'i'm so sorry,' you let out, not being able to hold it in.

vernon pauses and closes the fridge, turning to you. 'for what?'

'for ruining your holiday. for holding you back. you are supposed to go and enjoy the safari with all the guys but instead you are here stuck with me,' your voice cracks in the end. 'i'm sorry, i know this is not how you pictured this trip.'

vernon doesn't say anything when he comes back. he stays silent as he wraps an icepack around your swollen ankle, covering it few towels so it can stay in place. he doesn't utter a word as he brings you water and granola pudding, shuffling your pillows so sitting would be much more comfortable. 'did you ask me to stay?' he suddenly asks, startling you. 'did you ask me to stay with you here?'

'no,' you answer, a bit confused.

'no, you didn't,' vernon agrees, nodding. 'i am here because i chose to be here. you're not ruining anything for me, you're not holding me back, so please stop apologizing. i want to be here.'

it feels like a punch in the gut. it feels like this is an admission of something bigger and you're too scared to go there, to breach that territory. vernon is kneeling in front of you, adjusting the ice pack and his hands grazy your skin softly. 'don't you want to be with our friends?' you ask even though that's not what you actually wanted to ask.

vernon seems to know it too by the way he looks at you. 'i'd rather stay with you here.'

butterflies are rising and you can't do anything to stop them. hope flares up in your chest and you want to squash it, tell it that it's too fucking soon, that-

'why did you come here?' he asks, maintaining eye contact with you. 'your best friend is not here and i know for a fact that you'd rather stayed at home instead of coming here. but you are here. why?'

because of you, you want to say. because i wanted to be close, because i stupidly thought that maybe if we spend more time together you will like me back. what comes out is: 'why did you stay?'

vernon chuckles. his hand caresses your leg lightly, lovingly. 'for the same reason you came here,' he finally answers. 'because of you.'

there's lump in your throat and it's a bit hard to swallow. later you will bring all the pain medication for making you emotional. 'you'd rather spend this day with me and swollen ankle than with the guys?' you ask in a trembling voice.

vernon looks at you like only you exist in this world. for him it is like that, but you don't know it yet. 'i'd choose you either way. any way. always.'

swollen ankle throbs, but it doesn't really matter when vernon's lips are on yours and he kisses you like what he said is all true. and it is.

request your own here

my other seventeen work is here

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writingwisterias · 3 days ago

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Hi! I'm new to your blog and love it! I had the idea of Leon finding out he's video game character. How do you think that would go depending on what game he's in?

Hiii welcome!!

I'm so sorry this late, I hope you have enjoyed your time being here omg ily

I also wasn't entirely sure what you meant but then got the idea of him interacting through cutscenes almost like breaking the forth wall! So I hope you enjoy and if it isn't what you meant feel free to request again and I'll do another 💕

Warnings: None

Gn!Reader

RE2:

The night is already stressful enough, like he's on edge. Mentally panicking. Just all the above.

So when he figures it out, I think he would use it as an escape almost

Like you'll notice he'll talk aloud a lot more and to himself almost like he's trying to have a conversation with you.

He also asks you questions about random topics just to hear you talk more instead of the sounds around him

It makes him feel less alone

In cut scenes his eyes will wander like he's trying to find where he can see you

When he whimpers he turns really red if you comment on the sounds he's making

RE4R:

Definitely backflipping to impress you

As well as all his round house kicks

Breaking chains without the guns just to show you how strong he is but if you comment on it he'll blush

He also wouldn't really acknowledge your existence but will blush at any comments etc that you make

Praises get you in good books, especially around his boss fight with Krasuer

The constant reminder that he will get Ashley back safely spurs him on

Infinite darkness:

The hallway scene where he shoots the zombie without looking was for you

I feel like he would break the forth wall in the scene where Jason and Shen mei give him no information

He's just side glancing at you with a "are you kidding me face"

All of his shoulders and model looking faces are for your pleasure

Along with any of acrobatic shit he does

Damnation:

Doesn't really acknowledge you but will smirk if you laugh at his stupid jokes

The "don't be shy" joke was just to get you flustered

I think when he's injured a lot as well or has a few seconds to himself I think your praise and encouragement he would appreciate

He already wills himself to get up despite everything but hearing you just makes it all the better

RE6:

Much like ID Leon when helana refuses to tell him anything during the first half of the game he's side glancing and smirking at you

Will also whisper under his breath

In cutscenes when you get close he will do a very subtle wink

Starts showing off more in combat if you comment on it

The slutty walk he does gets even worse when he hears you fawn over it

He would again also use you as an escape as he faces the same trauma again and again during the events of the game

Your praises just spur him on to run a little faster or work a little harder in a boss fight

Vendetta:

If you call him cool during the motorcycle scene then you are in his good books

In fact the only reason he then proceeds to ride the bike up the building is to show off

In the second that he hangs off the edge of the building he'll need you to get him to snap out of it

Along with when arias threatens to spill his guts

Any form of praise or encouragement is getting him riled up

Death Island:

Again with the bike stuff, you are in his good books if you call him cool

If you comment on the fight with Maria and how he must have liked being stepped on he'll give you a smirk (we all know he's into that shit)

Hangs from places like a monkeh for a bit too long because he's showing off the fact he can literally do that with ONE arm

If you call him pretty he'll do that deep chuckle thing

If you laugh at his jokes he'll smirk at you

#~mads rambles #~mads~mail💌#leon kennedy #leon kennedy x reader #resident evil x reader #leon s kennedy x reader #resident evil #resident evil fanfiction #leon scott kennedy #leon kennedy x you #leonkennedy #leon resident evil #leon s kennedy

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pupyuj · 8 hours ago

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hi ena! long time no ask!!

with the recent miumiu wonyoung photos GOSHH MY MIND IS SPINNINGGF WITH THOUGHTSS😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

dubcon!!

what if…princess jang who comes from a wealthy noble family purchases you to be her pretty slave😁 the thing is you weren’t even being sold as one despite your family leaning towards the poorer class😱turns out she randomly spotted you at a market and ordered her people to do anything and everything just to have you in the palm of her hands! crazy!!!!! one day you were just taken away from your family! GOSH imagine the princess wonyoung herself carrying you to her room and gently laying you down on her bed🥺but, being the brat that you are you scratched and clawed at her, trying to resist her advances bc u were so so scared and confused :(( eventually, the remaining patience she had for you snaps and she just fucks you hard to remind you of your place!!!! u were nothing but her stupid little slut to use whenever she wanted :(

(she starts off really gentle with you but fucks you rough and hard for being so rude and disobedient to he princess☹️)

omg yk that video of her sliding off her gloves to sign for a fan?? IMAGINE IF SHE DOES THAT BEFORE FINGERING YOU UNTIL URE IN TEARS BEGGING HER TO STOPPP UGHH😫😩😩

- 🍒

MY FAVORITE CHERRY ANON!! i know, i know this ask took me forever to do again but we're all probably used to it to it to the point where i don't even have to address it 😭 since the photos are now not-so-recent, i'll attach them here so everybody can visualize it well hehehe 🤭

(@ CHERRY ANON IK YOU'RE WONDERING IF I AM ALSO WORKING ON THAT OTHER WONY ASK THAT YOU SENT AND I'M GONNA BE HONEST I THINK I DELETED IT?? which sucks bcs i was JUST thinking of answering it too just now until i realized it was nowhere to be found so IF UR STILL UP FOR IT AND IF YOU REMEMBER THE GIST, FEEL FREE TO SEND IT AGAIN! pretty sure it was about sororities?? 🤔)

p.s. you guys are crazy if you think i'm not gonna give this ask some meat (aka mini lore) so if this happens to be a long one that's why! 😭😭

[cw: extreme dubcon, (eventually) cnc, coercion, bondage, mild violence, obsessive-possessive princess!wony WOOO.]

you were happy as a commoner, okay!? even though your fate was sealed as a middle-class man's stay-at-home wife and child bearer in the future, you were going to make the most of your life despite it all! but that was before you encountered her highness jang wonyoung while you were out to shop for new formal robes. oh, sorry, you didn't 'encounter' her—she saw you animatedly chatting with the nice young clerk at the apparel shop and became obsessed fell in love at first sight 😍😍

your whole life took a whole other turn when a couple knights knocked on your door and took you from your family by force and with only a brief answer when asked: "her highness wills it so." 🥲 your family was then visited by the princess' retainer to give them a more detailed explanation of the whole situation but you didn't know that. you didn't have to. what only mattered from then on was whatever the fuck wonyoung wanted with you... and it was everything you anticipated it to be! almost.

nobles were all the same, after all. and the worst among them was the royalty. you half expected to have been stripped down in the carriage by the knights and dragged throughout the castle naked and bare before they throw you inside the princess' quarters where she would be more than ready to just... ravage you, but that didn't turn out to be true. not all the way! you made it to the doors of the castle with your clothes still on you and you weren't just haphazardly thrown inside the princess' room... the knights were given special instructions to treat you like glass! or else the princess would have their heads if they so much as scratched your beautiful, delicate skin.

wonyoung herself met you at the doors of the great hall, actually! she couldn’t contain her excitement because finally, she found someone that she knew was going to satisfy all her needs and make the perfect wife! never mind that you were some lowly commoner, you were beyond perfect in the princess’ eyes!

“do you know me… (y/n)?” you don’t even want to know how she just knew your name. you were confused, terrified, and furious all at the same time and wonyoung loved it. anybody else would have been scrambling to kiss her feet and beg for forgiveness even though they knew they did nothing wrong… but of course you’d be different. wonyoung was so happy.

nevertheless, you plucked up whatever courage you had left in yourself and answered her question, “the crown princess… jang wonyoung.” even the way you said her name was impeccable! ah, how wonyoung couldn’t wait to make you hers completely… and that’s exactly what she attempts to do once she took you to her room but of course, you fought back! 🥺

kicking and hitting wonyoung whenever she tried to get close to you on the bed, even shrieking and screaming for help just in case there was a servant who felt sorry enough to interrupt but who in their right mind would dare get in the way of the princess? 🤨 it was when you scratched her chin that she finally had enough of your shit and straight-up whacked you across the face... her highness has never had to use violence to gain control and advantage but goodness you really pushed all the wrong buttons!!

somehow it wasn't the painful sting on your cheek that made you settle down... bcs if you weren't directly staring at the small, bleeding cuts you've made on wonyoung's chin, you would've made an even bigger fuss when she roughly undressed you! sure, you feared the consequences of literally hurting the princess wonyoung but... she was still a beautiful woman!! what you did was like the equivalent of defacing a famed painter's greatest work—you definitely deserve whatever punishment was waiting for you 🫢🫢

wony won’t take your resistance seriously once she’s seen how drenched you are for her! she only takes that as a sign that she was welcome.. and that you did, in fact, want this! 🤭 she assumed that you can take her at whatever pace she decides to go with bcs you were a commoner that was gorgeous and deliciously naïve… surely you’ve been passed around before right?? but no… you were a virgin :(( but you were taking wonyoung’s fingers so well… meeting her thrusts halfway as if you’ve always known how to do it like that… moaning “your highness” so nicely against her ear that it gave her goosebumps… so ofc wony ignores your tears and your pleas to stop when you’ve already cum many times 🫠

but ah you were really testing her!! wony was bound to get some bruises with the way you’ve kicked and hit her so much… so she ties your hands up above your head and your legs spread apart with either ankle tied down at the edge of the bed! this way it would be much, much easier to punish you 🤭 she’s definitely relentless when using her mouth… esp since she just got a taste of her new food and oh, were you delectable…!

wonyoung couldn’t get enough… using her tongue on you over and over again throughout the night whilst talking to you about how perfect your life was going to be now that you were with her… and she very much liked how you didn’t even fight her words anymore! she knew that even though you cried gallons of tears and made your voice hoarse from wailing and moaning you wouldn’t dare look back on your past life anymore! 🤭

since then your daily activities as the crown princess’ future consort was to look pretty, study in both academics and noble etiquette, and most importantly, tending to wonyoung’s… needs 🫠🫠 you knew that every servant, knight, and nobles that frequented the castle talked badly about you. how a peasant managed to captivate the princess’ heart with ease. their words cut through you pretty badly but wonyoung was always there every night to mend your wounds… always.

you didn’t even care that wonyoung fucked you too hard anymore! bcs she has somehow led you to believe that she was the only one in this world that loved you and can stand to love someone like you 🫣 and you only believed her bcs you did feel her love with every thrust of her fingers, every disgusting thing that she whispers in your ears while she fucked you, every flick of her tongue as she ate you out, every bite on your lips when she kisses you. you were only right to love her back in spite of everything else bcs… like wonyoung always assured, this is what true love is, right?? 🤭

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afriendofblahaj · 2 days ago

Text

OMG

@ccelest1al wrote this AMAZING guide for helping with this. Share it with anyone you know who hates body or facial hair.

It’s supposed to be a markdown file but tumblr doesn’t let me attach files, so I’ve just pasted the contents below the cut

## Introduction

Hello! I don't know who else I'm going to share this with so in case you do not know me, I am Charlie (it/she) and I'm a pre-medical transition MtF trans girl who has been out for 4 years! As such, I have a *lot* more experience than most with shaving extreme gorilla levels of hair, and want to share some advice for people that might be in a similar spot. First I'll cover the different methods of hair removal, then go into my personal recommendations for each area of the body.

## General Shaving Advice

*Above all else, prioritise your skin health.*

There will be times when you will shave wrong and it will *feel* fine. Perhaps you already have some of these bad habits yourself. I often hear about people dry shaving and saying its "not that bad", or using 4 week old razors and saying "oh it works fine". It doesn't. If you care about your skin, you need to do things *properly*.

*Leading off of the last point, take care of your skin in other ways too*

If you are not already moisturising, start. If you ever shave and notice spots, try and shave around the area as to not aggravate it, and get cream for it. If you rash, get some cream for it. The pursuit of being completely hairless is fine and all but I promise you will be a lot happier if you have a SLIGHT bit of hair but healthy skin, rather than horrible skin but no hair.

*You are not attacking your hair, you're getting rid of it*

Be gentle. I know it can be hard with dysphoria, and you sometimes can feel like you want to rip the entire top layer of your skin off, but if you go slow and steady you will get a better cut that will last longer. Ideally you want to aim for a routine that lets you shave each part of the body *before* it becomes a dysphoria problem to avoid this specifically.

## Razors

Razors are the most obvious method of hair removal, they are the Swiss Army knife of shaving, and what you'll use for the vast majority of your body. Choosing razors that are both affordable and good for your skin can take a while, but cheaping out can be seriously bad depending on the brand.

When looking for razors, much to most transfem's distaste I recommend steering clear of women's razors unless you're on E, they just aren't often heavy duty enough, and there *is* a difference: the men's razors tend to have more blades, I've very rarely seen women's quad blade razors. You want to be going for quad-blade; they'll give a much better cut without having to repeatedly go over the same skin over and over.

I have used a variety of different ones over the years, but disposables are what I have found works *for me*. If you want an electric razor, go for it, it will probably save you money in the long run.

You're also going to *need* foam or gel. **THIS IS NOT AN OPTIONAL PART OF SHAVING WITH A RAZOR**. You will fuck up your skin if you do not use one or the other, and a little goes a long way. Gel generally lasts longer but I've heard the sensation can be weird to some people

Replace your blades when they go blunt, you'll get a feel for this eventually yourself, but a good guideline in the beginning is every 2-3 *MAJOR* shaves. "Oh but I don't want to cut myself by using too sharp a blade!", you're more likely to cut yourself on a blunt blade than a sharp one.

### Buying Guide

- Look for Quad Blade razors

- If you want an electric, check how much the heads cost in advance, you're going to be changing the heads often enough that price *absolutely* is a concern

- Avoid BIC like the plague, they might make good pens but they make *horrible* razors

### Usage

This one should be pretty self explanatory but I know no one ever showed me, so I'll explain it anyways, there's no shame if you don't know:

1. Run a tap/shower until you have warm water, just warm, doesn't need to be scalding hot.

2. Get the area you're shaving wet

3. Get out your foam/gel.

1. If you're using foam, get a big scoop in your hand and then apply it to the area. It doesn't need to be too thick, but generally you can't see the hair if you're using foam

2. If you're using gel, you'll be suprised how much mileage you get out of a tiny bit. Just spread it out across the skin until its slick and easy to glide over

4. Run your razor under the tap, then press down (not too hard) on your skin and run it up, do 2-3 passes like this, getting a whole strip of where you've applied your foam/gel, then run it under the tap again to get the excess hair out from between the blades, this will make it last much longer

5. Repeat until you're cleanly shaven!

Don't rapidly run over the same place over and over, it will rash, and there is also a few areas you have to be careful about, which I will mention in the body-part specific portions later.

## Tweezers

Tweezers are a little more specific when it comes to their purpose, but its pretty essential to have these too. They're obviously good at very specific areas of the body, usually places where you typically wouldn't expect or want hair: moles, your nipples, mono-brow etc. However they're also handy for one other specific task: in-grown hairs. The more you shave, the more ingrown hairs are going to become a problem, so have tweezers on hand if you notice any. You might not be able to see them, they often look like little red bumps under the skin, I didn't even know they were ingrown hairs for quite a while. Particular areas to watch for them are on the chest, your pubic hair, and your upper thighs.

### Buying Guide

Tweezers can vary in quality quite a lot, and sometimes you're gonna need different shaped ones based on what you're doing. I would recommend getting a set somewhat like these ones [here](https://www.amazon.co.uk/Smukdoo-Professional-Tweezers-Extension-Multi-Colored/dp/B0998ZQ6F4https://www.amazon.co.uk/Smukdoo-Professional-Tweezers-Extension-Multi-Colored/dp/B0998ZQ6F4). I can't vouch for those specific ones, but that's what you're looking for. You can find them at basically any pharmacy.

### Usage

Once again, should be pretty obvious but I will explain just in case:

- For surface level hairs, simply just grab an appropriate set of tweezers that'll give you a good grip, then pluck from as close to the skin as possible, pulling slowly to avoid just tearing the hair in half.

- For ingrown hairs, sometimes I end up digging below the skin just a *little* with the tweezers in order to hook a thick part of the hair, then pull it out using that. This probably isn't the most safe or sanitary method, so if you're going to do it just make sure the tweezers are clean first. Hook a thick part of the hair, ideally any bits near the surface if possible, then pull gently to get it to unfurl.

## Scissors

Scissors are kind of niche and you're only really gonna use them for one area, and only if you're wanting to simply keep hair *manageable* as opposed to cleanly shaven, and that's your pubic region. Scissors can help clear dense bits of hair that would normally blunt or be ineffective to attack with a razor, but where the other methods (like cream) would be unsafe to use.

### Buying Guide

I have always just used a spare pair of nail scissors, they're small enough that they're quite good for that task. Just make sure you keep them separate from your...actual nail scissors. You can again find these at most pharmacies.

### Usage

*PLEASE be extra careful putting sharp objects anywhere near your crotch*. Do not cut too close to the skin to help mitigate some risk, and I'd really only recommend doing this if you haven't trimmed your bush in months and need a full on weed-whacker to get started. Trim it down to a level where you could use a razor, then immediately switch over to using that, it's much safer and easier to get a cleaner shave.

## Epillators

Full transparency, I *cannot* use an epillator. I own one, and desperately tried to use it for a few weeks, but it was completely unmanageable with my high sensitivity to touch. However anecdotally I have heard they can be quite good. Compared to a razor, you have to actually do your routine significantly less often (around every 3 weeks for places like the legs), and its much easier to do, taking only around 5 minutes. However it is PAINFUL. After a while either your skin gets used to it, or you just get psychologically used to it, and it becomes less painful. It's up to you if you want to pursue this path since it can be *very* good, especially if you don't want a shaving routine of about an hour like my biweekly one is.

### Buying Guide

(Will put the brand of my epillator if i ever find it)

### Usage

This one is pretty simple, but its all in the care afterwards. You're gonna irritate your skin quite a lot doing it, and it can be helpful to have someone else do it so you can just focus on grimacing through the pain. Just apply the epillator to the skin where you need to shave and run it slowly up until you get all of the hairs. Then apply cream to any particularly sore or red areas.

## Hair Removal Cream

Hair "Removal" Cream is a bit of a misnomer, as it's more like "hair thinning cream". Hair removal cream is a big part of my personal routine, and I find it really good as a time-saver for places that are difficult or nearly impossible to shave, namely the ass. *However*, using hair removal cream can go wrong, I have chemically burnt myself on occasion, not anything particularly severe but it was bad for obvious reasons. It's mostly about knowing your skin and how long you can take, the packet usually says around 6-10 minutes, I go on the upper end of that, but my girlfriend burns if she goes for more than 6.

**NOTE: Basically all hair removal creams explicitly say not to use it on your anal, peri-anal, and genital regions. I use it on my ass and I'm fine, but I'm not sure if I'm the exception. However, DO NOT use it to thin your pubic hair**

### Buying Guide

Get name brands like Nair, I go through a full tube every 2 weeks simply because I use it for both my arms and my ass, but the bigger tubes can last a lot longer. You can get Nair from basically any pharmacy as with all of these things.

### Usage

- Apply the cream in a thick, even layer over the hair, do not rub it in

- Set a timer on your phone for 6-8 minutes (for Nair), when it runs out run a warm shower, and grab a flannel

- Wash the cream off, rubbing with the flannel quite hard. The hair should just flake off in big chunks, and whatever is left will be extremely thin

## Autism Specific Considerations

Before going into specific body parts, here are some autism specific considerations that I think are good to be made aware of beforehand:

- Shaving your legs can completely change the feeling of them, this was quite overwhelming for me the first time, especially when getting into bed

- Nair, Shaving Foam, and Shaving Gel all have very distinct smells that can linger for a while

- Nair can change how your skin feels for an hour or two after, I apply moisturiser to my arms and it usually fixes this feeling

- Epillators can often be sensory hell, I'm someone with way less touch sensitivity than most and I still found it unbearable

## Body Parts

### Face

Face is the one that you will be doing the most often, for me it's a delicate balance of doing it often enough to keep my 5 o'clock shadow at bay, while still not irritating too much. I have settled on twice a day, though I know plenty of people that go anywhere from every 2 days, to every day. Use a razor for more general shaving, then tweezers to catch any specific hairs that may irritate you (I have a few on the underside of my chin)

*Tools:* Razor, Tweezers

*Tips:*

- Moisturiser is literally magic and will make shaving significantly less likely to irritate your skin. Always apply afterwards.

- Having sharp razors is particularly important for your face, a cut is going to be a lot more noticeable and bother you for a lot longer

### Chest

Chests are pretty easy to shave but can be awkward to see in the mirror. I have my girlfriend help me with this nowadays, but when I didn't, i made sure to do this in front of a mirror. Liberally cover with gel/foam from your neck down to your boobs, and between your boobs too to catch that weird spot of hair that appears in the middle. Then just systematically go through it. You likely wont get all of it, but it will be enough to not be visible. Then, pick off any larger hairs from your nipples with a pair of tweezers (it doesn't hurt as much as you think it would)

*Tools:* Razor, Tweezers

### Arms

Arms are REALLY fucking difficult to do on your own, but its workable. Generally unless you're a full on gorilla like me, you can get away with only shaving your lower arms, then only using cream on the upper. This is what I did for years, but recent increases in T have made this no longer enough. You should use hair removal cream to thin out the hair first, then simply go over it with a razor

*Tools:* Razor, Hair Removal Cream

### Armpits

If you want to shave your armpits, use lots of foam or gel since they can be VERY easy to irritate. Other than that they're really simple. If you rash them, E45 cream or similar is good.

*Tools:* Razor

### Crotch/Galls

This is easily the most annoying part to keep cleanly shaven. If you're okay with bush, just own it. Make sure you're shaving enough to keep hygienic (yes, you do have to shave SOMETIMES even if you do want bush) but beyond that it doesn't matter too much. For thicker hair use scissors to get it down to an appropriate length to use a razor. When you shave the balls, stretch the skin taut so you can run the razor along it, make sure you're using plenty of foam/gel.

*Tools:* Scissors, Razor

### Ass

The ass is a tricky one unless you are willing to ignore the warnings on the packet of your Nair and just do it. If so it's easy! You can get enough off on the inside to comfortably not have to worry about bum fluff, and if you want a closer shave then just get a razor up there, one leg up on something high (like the toilet seat) and legs slightly spread. **DO NOT LET YOUR NAIR STAY ON FOR TOO LONG, CHEMICALLY BURNT ASS FUCKING HURTS**.

*Tools:* Hair Removal Cream, Razor

### Legs

Legs are the most time consuming, but thankfully the easiest, though it kind of depends on how thick you are. If you're like me and have big thighs, shaving the upper portions can take a while. Just take it slow, and do it in order, bottom half of both legs first, then the top half. In my experience the thigh hair doesn't grow back as thick or as quickly as the lower legs, and since I mostly wear long skirts I rarely bother to shave too rigorously up there. This will always be the most time consuming part of your shaving routine, and you can sometimes feel a bit queasy from being in the weird positions that shaving there requires for so long, so *be slow*.

*Tools:* Razor

## How I Structure My Shaving

Having a routine can help a lot for staying on top of dysphoria, and you can kinda take two approaches based off of how quickly your hair is growing back. Either:

- Shave daily for around 10 minutes before and during a shower

- Shave every 2 weeks for about an hour, dealing with the faster growing hair in the meantime

For me, I find it quite hard to commit to daily shaving, so I do my shaving routine as follows:

- Shave my face twice a day, once in the morning, once in the evening

- Shave my chest once a week

- Shave everything else every two weeks

If you're doing it just to present a relatively hairless appearance, this will be enough, but sometimes dysphoria can be a bitch, so you may want to do it more often *for yourself*.

I hate facial hair and body hair :(

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newttxt · 9 hours ago

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hi quip! i really like your one piece comics and i am curious how you do them! i'm not good at comics and want to be better at drawing them! how do you learn how to make comics?

thank you!

uh oh... im afraid u have caught me at the perfect crossroad of "bored at work" and "unrelated task ive been meaning to do but keep putting off."

this is long. i hope you like reading (and grayscale progress pics). and of course!!! disclaimer before we begin that this is just how I, personally draw comics. there is no "right way."

quip's comic-making process!

Switching my typing to make this more legible...

My process can kinda be broken down into 6 steps:

Brainstorming

Thumbnailing

Sketching

Panels & Text

Lines

Tones/Colors

1. Brainstorming

My brain is a leaky sieve on a good day, so I sloppily jot down ideas in my phone notes the moment I have them. This helps me when it's time to draw too, because if I feel art blocked, I can look through old concepts and see what catches my interest.

Otherwise, I love drawing for other people's writing. :) And if worst comes to worst, doing manga/comic page redraws in my style teaches me new things every time.

Once I have my idea, I'll usually make a bulletpoint list of "plot points" or "story beats" I want. Then I plan the comic with this format that I've adapted from a tutorial I read once. I'm going to use my most recent comic (original comic post) as an example.

I start in the third column, writing notes of what I'd want to see in each panel. I also include the dialogue (in this case, I didn't have to write the dialogue! it's from the fanfic linked in the original comic post!). I usually write the whole name like [Luffy:], but at this point I've drawn so much of these guys, just the first letter works.

I like to handwrite these notes to get an idea for how much text I'm putting in a single panel.

After I describe all the panels, I go back and separate them into pages. I can't tell you how to know how many panels to a page. It's whatever works for you. I just kinda know about how big each panel will be, and so I can feel when I'm probably running out of space. (Also. You can change things later. I don't in this example, but I add/drop pages/panels all the time.)

2. Thumbnailing

Thumbnailing—as the name suggests—should be done tiny. Too tiny to accidentally get sucked into details.

This is about marking down blobs where items/characters go, and figuring out the paneling. I'll draw and redraw these a bunch of times too.

This is also the most time-consuming/brain-working part for me. If I were in a zine that did progress percentage, I'd try to finish thumbnailing around the 50% mark (but I'm also a moderately fast artist, so your mileage may vary).

I think the terrible quality makes them charming, actually. I really like how silly they look. :')))

I will add, when you draw your "page" rectangle, make sure it's the same proportions as your actual canvas for the final image. You want an accurate idea of how much space each panel will take up, especially if you have a lot of text.

3. Sketching

This is my most recent change to my usual workflow, and it's saving me a lot of time. I make my thumbnails a bit bigger (each one about half the size of the final canvas), and I sketch these basic body forms right over them.

It just helps give me placement for my actual lines!

I usually draw these in a paleish color so I can lower the opacity and not get distracted by them while lining. The random darker parts are to either help keep two forms separate (like when two characters have their limbs all over) or to better define sections that were too sloppy/poorly proportioned.

I also think this helps my poses stay looser, because I have more dramatic/wriggly shapes that aren't too bogged down by proportions yet.

Sidenote: I CANNOT show this here, but sometimes this is when I take videos. Of myself. I prop my phone camera up and shoot a video of me acting each panel. :/// It looks really dumb, but it also shows me fun body language ideas like hand gestures, expressions, weight distribution, etc. Just pretend you're an overdramatic cartoon character, and try not to worry about your roommates or mother walking in on you doing odd things. (You can also use the video for anatomy reference later, but I usually just capture the vibe and don't try to copy the actual video frame.)

4. Panels & Text

Oh, boy. So, the panels are usually just straight lines (though it's fun to make creative exceptions, like a round panel to mimic looking through a spyglass), but there are some fancy rules that I don't strictly adhere to.

I believe (I have no technical training in this. Take everything I say with a grain of salt) the vertical gaps (between two side-by-side panels) should all be a consistent width and the horizontal gaps (between two panels on top of each other) should be another. The vertical ones? Should be thinner? Because you want the eye to easily glide between them, whereas the horizontal gaps should be a visual barrier to keep you from jumping ahead. Just something I've vaguely noticed.

There are lots of fun "default layouts" you can look up. Or keep it a consistent grid. I think it's fun to sometimes have characters/objects sticking out of panels and overlapping others. This is just a matter of taste, creativity, and inspiration. (Read Witch Hat Atelier... It has some of my favorite paneling...)

You may also notice I have already done the speech bubbles. This is, to me, a crucial step. This helps me catch early if I don't have enough room for all the words. It also lets me plan the art in each panel with the speech bubbles in mind. There's nothing worse than working really hard on a panel, and then you realize there's no room for the bubbles.

I also try to lay them out in a way that guides the eye! Even without art, can people tell where to go next? Better yet, if I want people to look at panels out of order (aka not left to right, in my case), can I use the speech bubble path to make them? Here's just a vague example of what I mean.

As an added bonus, doing speech bubbles early also allows me to be lazy! :) Ignore the comic; I'm not supposed to post it yet oops,, There's a whole lot of drawing to do on each comic page, and I am not wasting my time on stuff that will be covered up. So yes, if I hide my bubbles, there are a lot of unfinished lines trailing off into nothing. (As a bonus, if there's a part of a character you're struggling with—and it won't look weird to do so—you can move speech bubbles to just hide the problem area yayyy)

Making the actual bubbles could be their own whole tutorial, tbh, but there are some general guidelines I use.

Zoom out when you choose your font size. You want to know how it will look to the average reader, so it isn't super teeny tiny or way too big. You generally want to keep the same text size for all your pages/bubbles.

When I draw bubbles, I try to size them about one vertical letter height (and some change) around the words [left side]. This isn't always the case though, because humorously large or funny shaped text bubbles can convey different feelings [right side].

On Procreate, I set my bubble lines to Reference and just drag-and-drop the white fill on a separate layer below the lines. (Remember to turn Reference back off again when you're done, or your fill bucket won't work right when you're drawing.)

To get the white outlines I use to keep the bubbles from cluttering up the art, I literally just Gaussian blur an all-white copy of the lines + fills... and then I copy and merge it 5 times until it's opaque enough. This is a terrible way to do it, but it works for me. :')

5. Lines

This is the part that I can't tell you how to do. I literally just. Draw right over my wacky sketched body forms. Boom. Comic drawn.

I'll make three suggestions:

Don't focus on making every panel perfect. Give a little extra love to big ones or ones you want people to linger on. Otherwise, know that people are typically speeding through the art. It's way more important to focus on storytelling than art technique. In my opinion, a good story that's told well will always be better than a beautiful one told poorly. (Some comics are beautiful AND well-written... Alas, I am just a hobbyist who needs to get the ideas out of my head at top speed.)

Put your background lines on a different layer. Put your foreground lines on a different layer too, if you have those. Basically, I try to keep the main part of each panel (usually a character or object) on my lines layer so I can erase background/foreground/etc lines to ensure clarity/focus.

You can make background lines lighter colors too. I have too many numbers sorry. (1) Background. The stuff that's farthest away. Lightest lines. Few details; more focused on shapes and the suggestion of a background (I'm not good at backgrounds). (2) Midground. Same distance away as the characters are. Lines can be black. (3) Also midground, and also the same distance away. But they're very detailed, so I lighten them so they aren't so distracting. (4) The characters. Black lines for focus. For people who haven't seen the comic, I swear they are just hugging. This is SFW. D:

6. Tones/Colors

Do not. Do NOT ask me. I don't understand colors. I hate working with them, but I try because I want to improve. I hate doing anything beyond the simplest grayscale shading. Please go elsewhere for your coloring/tone advice. This is how my color picker looks 95% of the time. I have pre-set "percentages" of black that I got by lowering the opacity of a black layer and just color picking it. I don't even know the exact percentages I used. Good luck out there. Be better than me.

7. Sharing

This is a bonus step that I didn't mention earlier, but it's actually the most important of all of them.

You need a friend. Or maybe a groupchat or discord. A family member or coworker if you're really close like that. I don't know.

Find SOMEWHERE you can spam wips and be cheered on. Drawing comics takes a while, especially if you're trying to tell longer stories than I'd dare to attempt. If I don't force someone to praise me for every line I draw, I shrivel up and die.

Also if and when you post online, add alt text. I'll admit I'm the first person to complain and drag my feet on this, and I literally use a screenreader myself when my eyes hurt (strong prescription glasses wearer). Comics should be accessible, because stories are fun and everyone should be able to enjoy them.

***

Learning???

And I guess lastly, how do you learn to make comics? Two steps: 1) read them and 2) make them. This is the tragedy of creating things.

1) Reading them: I grew up reading comic strips, western serialized comics, and webcomics. I've always loved graphic novels too. Then in late middle school, I started reading manga (Death Note and Haikyuu were my first two), and now I'm trying to read more webtoons (sorry im so slow bree)!

I also... mass-consume doujinshi, thanks to proxy mailing services and bilingual friends/Google Translate/knowing some Korean. (I have an entire bookshelf of doujin, actually,,)

The thing is, it's not usually enough to just read comics. You also need to be thinking. :/ I notice paneling, comic devices, clever comedic timing, etc. as I go. It's just a lot of studying/learning while also enjoying the story.

2) Making them: You just have to start. :( Even if you think they're "bad." My first comics were actually just drawings placed randomly all over the page, connected by speech bubbles (yay... I was already practicing how to place bubbles to lead the eye around the page...). I was going to post a pic here, but I'm a coward. Backscroll my account and you can find some older ones though.

I also know my art in general improved dramatically when I did ten comics in ten weeks for my friend's fic. Don't do this. It hurt my hands/wrists. But do practice in moderation.

***

If you actually read all that... I hope it made even a modicum of sense. And maybe it was even helpful? Just know at the end of the day, there is literally no right way to draw a comic.

And if you aren't ready to go for it yet, you can start by just adding a couple speech bubbles to your illustrations or doodles! It's a way to add storytelling and dialogue writing to things you may already be making.

Yay. I love comics. :))))

#art tips #ask #THANK YOU FOR ASKING THIS #PLEASE TALK TO ME ABOUT STORYTELLING AND ART AND COMICS #i have so much more i can say but i will not because this post is already way too dense #ive been meaning to finish/post this for so long im sorry #making comics is this fun blend of THINKING REALLY HARD AND WITH PURPOSE and doing things innately and you rly dont know why #reference #art reference #i dont remember my tutorial tag #oh. was it #tutorial #I DONT REMEMBER

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