#but also if they did it injustice i would be super pissed so idk

[masters-and-magnets]

I legitimately keep forgetting that League of Extraordinary Gentlemen is a DC property half the time because I'm so used to seeing them milk the same small batch of characters, and just casually gloss over their forgotten children.

[vagrantblvrd]

Superhero/supervillain AU where Jeremy’s power is shapeshitfing something along the lines of Mystique.

Pair that with his incredible ability to mislead/lie/etc., and there’s an amazing AU of superhero!Jeremy who is recruited by government agencies/superhero teams for undercover work and so on.

Spends 99% of his adult career in the superhero field as someone else - guy has henchpersoned for the most vile superheros on Earth (and other worlds, because why not) and all that?

Maybe his bosses take advantage of his skills/abilities - God knows younger Jeremy wasn’t super bright - and maybe he’s responsible for a few injustices. (Wrongfully convicted people that begged him to think about what he was doing and he just thought they were trying to flip him?)

And you know at some point one of his bosses is sekritly a baddie and frames Jeremy for some horrendous incident.

A bus of nuns chaperoning orphans on their way to adopt kittens and puppies rescued from breeding mills that featured in a news segment with  Sarah McLachlan in the background because someone on the news crew forgot to put their phone on silent and it’s their ringtone because they love sadness or some shit, idk, but it makes Jeremy look awful, okay?

He has to go on the run and the only one he can turn to is, you know, this supervillain type in Ryan?

Former superhero0ish government agent/whatever Jeremy was who got burned the same way and fakes his death to come back as a masked supervillain.

He was supposed to be Jeremy’s next assignment but Ryan got a new head henchperson in Gavin instead, and just.

Yes.

The three of them working together to expose the baddie who framed Jeremy because common enemy/goals?

And Jeremy realizing how he’s been used all this time.

Ryan is like.

Obviously doesn’t trust Jeremy, but he knows what it’s like to be in his position? But he can’t go easy on Jeremy so he and Gavin basically haze him?

Send him off to do the grunt work when something like that needs doing. (Lol at him over the cameras they’ve got watching him as he has to slog through the sewers looking for an entrance to some facility or other they plan to infiltrate. One not on the blueprints - and doesn’t actually exist because someone gave them bad intel and the knew that? But they don’t let Jeremy in on it until he returns to the base/lair and is like no success, guys.

AND.

Sparring sessions with Gavin on the sidelines on his laptop or whatever and Jeremy and Ryan really going at it?

Ryan intentionally provoking Jeremy, needling him about all his past missions and how many times did he do the baddie’s dirty work for him? How many lives has he ruined and so on until Jeremy mcfreaking snaps.

Has been trying not to think about that until they stop the baddie and he can wallow all he wants? But Ryan won’t let him.

Ryan totally lets Jeremy pin him, this close to actually killing him in his anger?

But then Gavin’s there, calm and cold and ruthless with this knife or what have you at Jeremy’s throat and a polite, “Perhaps you should rethink things, Jeremy,” or “I don’t think so,” or something else super cool sounding my brain won’t cough up right now, but like.

The first time Jeremy sees Gavin as the threat he is and not just this somewhat bumbling henchperson?

Also.

He looks at Ryan and the isn’t gloating like he thought he would be? Hes just. Got this look on his face that’s a bit satisfied because you know the same thing happened to Ryan before, something that made him take a good long look at his life and the things he’d done thinking he was in the right and just, idk.

Then that whole sequence of Jeremy really re-evaluating his life up to that point. All the shit he did as a government agent/superhero/??? and how everything went wrong when he was framed.

Even the way he’d been looking at Ryan and Jeremy as temporary allies, useful in the moment but no real reason to give a fuck about them once everything was over? (Except there was this part of him that had grown to like them, even if they were bastards to him at first?)

While this is going on one of his old bosses finds him and offers him a deal - help them put a stop to the baddie and they can clear his name. Reinstate him, promote him, whatever, because they’re desperate and think Jeremy’s just going to fall in line that easily now. (Oh, and when Jeremy mentions Ryan and Gavin he’s told they  have to be stopped as well because supervillains??? Duh, Jeremy.)

Anyway, Jeremy tells them he’ll think about it and goes back to the base/lair.

Ryan has this look on his face like he knows something happened, but he doesn’t mention it. Turns back to Gavin who’s briefing him - and other henchpersons - about some new intel they got while Jeremy was gone.

Gavin glances at him, and Jeremy has the feeling he knows something is up too, but like Ryan doesn’t bring it up.

This intel that will help them get the baddie for sure this time and everyone works on some plan to that end.

Jeremy feeling guilty as hell the whole time because on one hand he could have his life back, get a damn promotion he should have gotten ages ago in the bargain and all that?

And all he has to do is betray Ryan and Gavin and the others who took him in when his life got all fucked up.

He keeps getting these looks from Ryan and Gavin - and like. Other henchpersons, but no one says anything.

The sparring sessions and whatnot continue and one day Jeremy’s like oh, fuck me, because Ryan and Gavin are going at it in the training room, right?

All Ryan’s power and strength up against Gavin’s speed and agility and it’s the cliche of it looking like they’re dancing rather than fighting?

Because, look.

There’s probably some history between them too, you know?

Former agent/superhero Ryan and this absolutel fucking bastard in Gavin who’s some internationally renowned thief/assassin and their flirty/sexual tension-filled encounters over the years?

Gavin being the one to help Ryan when he was betrayed by his bosses/whatever and all this trust and the whatnot, and of course they know one another’s fighting style forwards and backwards and all that.

Anyway.

They’re having a fucking blast, trading quips and pithy one-liners and it’s like. Jeremy doesn’t even know because it goes so far beyond the oh, no, he/they’re hot thing into something completely else.

And then!

The day of the Final Battle and the three of them at the forefront and Jeremy being forced to choose between getting his old life back, or....not.

Baddie’s been stopped/killed by his own hand because of course, and now it’s this one last choice on Jeremy’s part.

Ryan took a bad hit in the fight and Gavin protecting him with his body and -

He’s not even giving Jeremy a pleading look, with Jeremy standing there and choice to save them or destroy them in the pal of his hand (to be all fricking poetic about it), no.

He’s just watching Jeremy like hey, no, he gets it, he does, and also after all this, what’s your decision gong be, hmm? like he’s expecting Jeremy to betray them.

So of course Jeremy gets angry, fucking pissed, because he didn’t do all this personal growth shit for nothing, you know?

Turns his back on the people who went to him for help, expected him to fall in line like a good little sheep or whatever and tells them to fuck off.

Causes a distraction and calls in some of the henchpersons for a emergency exctraction and they hightail it to a sekrit bunker or whatever Ryan ha set up somewhere.

Jeremy sticks around long enough to make sure everyone’s going to be okay and then gets the hell out of there. (Guilty as hell and thinking he’s more than worn out his his welcome with Ryan and Gavin and it’s just better this way?)

Roams aimlessly around for a bit, does acts of superheroism and whatnot when he runs into a bad situation and then moves on.

And then, of course, there’s this time he superheroes his little heart out abd gets abducted by these henchpersons?

Doesn’t know who they work for because nondescript clothing/armor, and gets taken to some base/lair and put into your standard interrogation scene?

Uncooperative as hell with the asshole using the voice modulator asking him all these questions? (Kind of thinks this is it, this is how he dies in some assholes hidden base/lair/bunker like a loser.)

But then!

One of Jeremy’s answers is just an incredibly creative way to tell someone to fuck off an die? And the asshole with the voice modulator fucking loses it, starts laughing like an asshole and the modulator gets turned off or something because after a moment Jeremy recognizes the laughter.

Fucking Gavin.

Wheezing and squeaking until he turns the PA or whatever off, and the enforce type in the room with Jeremy sighs.

Looks up at the observation window that goes does cool high-tech shit to go from foggy white/reflective mirror to see-through glass and Gavin waves down at them, stupid grin on his face and still laughing.

The enforcer type sighs again and reaches up to pull off the mask/helmet/whatever and of fucking course it’s Ryan.

Him and Gavin looking all over the damn place for Jeremy all this time.

Well, okay. They gave him a few months to get his shit together, but when he just went on with his moping and it stopped being productive/whatever, they decided enough was enough.

Which is how they got to this little point in time.

Ryan sits down across from Jeremy and just. Looks at him.

Jeremy who hasn’t been taking the best care of himself and all that and just.

“You’re an idiot.”

Which Jeremy knows full well?

Doesn’t get the feeling Ryan and Gavin are going to kill him, because nah, but. There’s probably some yelling in his future.

Which, yes?

But also smooches.

First though, long involved talk. Awkward flirting with Jeremy  - fucking finally - realizing Ryan and Gavin are all oh, no, he’s hot about him and have been for a while. Didn’t do anything about it before now, because no way to know if he’d turn on them or not, and best not to complicate things further?

Once Jeremy picked them/their side over getting his old life back they thought it might be okay to test the waters and see if he was likewise interested in them?

But then he ran, and they were like, well okay, thinking that was as good as an answer? (And then they found out he was just. Getting himself in deeper and deeper in all the moping and going nowhere good, and just. Yeah.)

But now!

Awkward flirting and awkward dates and someone being daring enough to kiss someone goodnight on the cheek and all the dumb idiots in love shit I love.

And then the smooches and the whatnot.

Also the three of them being ~supervillains and the whatnot, because yes.

[simblrbreezycakes]

i was tagged by @chippedcupanddustybooks sweet bb. i am tagging @irrelephantsims @magnoliidae @simplymelaninated and anyone who hasn’t been tagged i swear i feel like the last person doing this LOL. heckin long ass questionnaire under the cut.

1. What is your full name? Brianna Leigh [Redacted] 2. What is your nickname? Breezy 3. Birthday? may 4th 4. What is your favorite book series? hmmmm series? idk.... i really like every single john grisham book and they aren’t related but when you have such a niche brand of book i feel like it counts lol.  5. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts? kinda on both. 6. Who is your favorite author? oh whew. tough one right here. idk man, i have a few? but if i had to choose i guezz i would say george orwell.   7. What is your favorite radio station? who tf listens to the radio like det anymore lmfao. i don’t have one. before i listened to 107.1 in memphis in the car sometimes, but i moved so. 8. What is your favorite flavor of anything? i loveeee pineapple anything. 9. What word would you use often to describe something great or wonderful? lit 10. What is your current favorite song? currently really into pink in the night by mitski and also sicko mode by travis scott.

11. What is your favorite word? good ole fuck(in/ed/etc.) i also really like voluptuous and bubbles. 12. What was the last song you listened to? last thing i listened to was another lifetime x nao.  13. What TV show would you recommend for everybody to watch? absolutely check out the good place. also hilda, the dragon prince, she-ra princess of power, criminal minds, law and order (the original), and snapped. 14. What is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down? i used to watch the notebook religiously when it rained/felt upset like shit. but lately i’ve been watching say yes to the dress to combat my depression lol. 15. Do you play video games? yah 16. What is your biggest fear? dying alone and no one finding me. like literally alone not like meta alone “oh no one loves me” like dead ass alone somewhere isolated. 17. What is your best quality, in your opinion? hmmmmm idk that i care a lot about other people? 18. What is your worst quality, in your opinion? all of them lmfao. i’m annoying, i’m physically unattractive, i talk too damn much, i can be kind of a bitch both intentionally and unintentionally, i’m a trash writer, i can be selfish, and i self depreciate a lot (lol see above response “all of them”) and i’m sure that gets on people who love and care about me’s nerves ((but like....i mean it lmfao)) 19. Do you like cats or dogs better? whew tough. prolly cats though.  20. What is your favorite season? winter followed by a tie between spring and fall.  21. Are you in a relationship? nah lmfao.  22. What is something you miss from your childhood? not being so fuckin ugly and depressed lmfao. 23. Who is your best friend? “my person” as greys anatomy stans would say is ivy lynn [redacted] [redacted] but i also wanna shout out my home girl mary (i know you follow me on here), my home girl christina (also follows me on here but she never checks her simblr anymore), my smoothie gang bitches, my NSA bitches (which includes both ivy and mary lmfao), and my memphis as fuck family. honorable mention to loml [redacted] who is skating on thin fucking ice with me right now lmfao. 24. What is your eye color? brown 25. What is your hair color? brown 26. Who is someone you love? don’t make me answer this tumblr gods. 27. Who is someone you trust? all my best friends, my parents, my brother. 28. Who is someone you think about often? fucking murder me @ this question lmfao. my friend kate (RIP) my grandmother grannypeg (RIP) and [redacted] 29. Are you currently excited about/for something? i’m excited to spend christmas in a new country! forging new traditions and all that. 30. What is your biggest obsession? currently i’m obsessed with wedding stuff and mens fashion and how mens fashion such as suits translates into womens fashion. we love a hot lady in a tailored suit amiright? 31. What was your favorite TV show as a child? spongebob squarepants RIP :”( 32. Who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone? [redacted] 33. Are you superstitious? kinda i guess? not really about stuff like stepping on cracks breaking mamas’ backs or opening umbrellas indoors but little things about familial traditions. 34. Do you have any unusual phobias? not really a phobia but i have misophonia. i also hate eye shit. like eye violence or anything fuckin around with eyes is a big no from me dawg. 35. Do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? absolutely behind the camera. i used to be a theater kid so like being on stage i don’t mind but when it comes to the spotlight and being filmed??? no no no no no. lemme be a cinnamontawgrowfur all day.  36. What is your favorite hobby? watching movies, playing skyrim (I MISS IT SO MUCH), reading, watching music videos, modern calligraphy/hand lettering, baking (ALSO MISS IT MUCH) 37. What was the last book you read? lol a textbook about developing countries.

38. What was the last movie you watched? i just rewatched the swan princess the other day but in terms of watching something brand new i think it was this tom cruise movie my friend showed us and i thought she said someone else ( i don’t remember now. maybe tom hanks?) it was pretty good he was irish or sum with nicole kidman and they came to the united states and pretended to be siblings but the sexual tension was so fucking high dawg. 

39. What musical instruments do you play, if any? nothing i’m wack and a disappointment to my musically gifted family (my dad and brother)  40. What is your favorite animal?  polar bears followed by giraffes. 41. What are your top 5 favorite Tumblr blogs that you follow? i’m gonna go with my main tumblr because ion wanna hurt nobody’s feelings but i follow a celebs of color page i really love, a fashion page i really love, and a few artists i really love. 42. What superpower do you wish you had? teleportation or shape shifting.  43. When and where do you feel most at peace?  i feel most at peace when it is raining and i’m in my room, everything is clean and tidy, candles are lit, i have nothing to do so the world is my oyster, i have a nice cup of coffee or hot cocoa or tea, and i just am v i b i n g.  44. What makes you smile? seeing my friends, my brother (when he isn’t pissing me off), funny videos of red dead people falling off their horse in cinematic mode, pretty flowers, cute art, round birds. 45. What sports do you play, if any? i don’t lmfao. 46. What is your favorite drink? honestly a frozen margarita no salt. 47. When was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody? a month ago.  48. Are you afraid of heights? absolutely. 49. What is your biggest pet peeve? people chewing with their mouths open and people talking to me like i’m incompetent/assuming i don’t know anything about what they’re trying to talk to me about especially if it is my area of expertise lol. 50. Have you ever been to a concert? hail yeah. many. 51. Are you vegan/vegetarian? nope! 52. When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? honestly i don’t know but i have a distinct memory of a bunch of girls in my second grade, yours truly included, wanting to be strippers. and i don’t know why or how this came up or if we even truly knew what stripping meant but. yeah. OH i guess around the time i was in 4th/5th grade i started wanting to be a harvard law graduate and be a lawyer but i gave that up in like high school and then bounced being a lawyer back and forth in my noggin up until i applied for grad school. shout out to my mary for doing it though.  53. What fictional world would you like to live in? hmmmm idk. none of em really. 54. What is something you worry about? if i made the right decision(s) in life lol.  55. Are you scared of the dark? not really.  56. Do you like to sing? yeah i do! doesn’t mean i’m good at it though haha. 57. Have you ever skipped school? yeah lmfao. 58. What is your favorite place on the planet? i miss Rwanda a lot. but honestly my favorite place is wherever the people i love are. my family loves to travel so whenever i’m with someone i love sharing an experience? i’m in heaven. 59. Where would you like to live? idk anywhere i guess. somewhere it is mostly cold most of the time though haha. 60. Do you have any pets? my bb boi fred lives with my dad and my mom has a dog and 2 cats. we used to have 3 but one of em ran away when she moved to her house, we caught him, he ran away again. oh whale. 61. Are you more of an early bird or a night owl? oh a big time night owl. big time. 62. Do you like sunrises or sunsets better? honestly i like sunrises better but i am never awake to catch em hahah. 63. Do you know how to drive? yah and i fuckin love doing it. 64. Do you prefer earbuds or headphones? i prefer headphones. like really quality ones too. but i tend to use earbuds more often because i don’t need quality while im working out or going to class just easy grab and go. 65. Have you ever had braces? nope but i used to want some so bad. 66. What is your favorite genre of music? i love rap, dream-y pop music and dream-y rap music, i love 80s music. all 80s music really lmfao.  67. Who is your hero? mi mum and mi dad. also viola davis queen of inventing acting and every single color in the rainbow. 68. Do you read comic books? kind of. i was trying to build up a collection before i moved but i only had my BP comics. 69. What makes you the most angry? injustice and offensive ass content and behaviors. also don’t fuck with my friends. i got two dudes on my shit list right now that it is *on sight* if i ever see them again. 70. Do you prefer to read on an electronic device or with a real book? a real book all the way. idk what it is about digital reading my brain shuts the fuck down. i am super fast reader but the second i try and read something digitally it takes me maybe like 10-15 min to get through just a few sentences. 71. What is your favorite subject in school? history lol i was a history major. 72. Do you have any siblings? yeah my chicken nugget puppy brother dylan. asshole. 73. What was the last thing you bought? some historical romance i think? it’s in dutch so idrk.  74. How tall are you? 5′7 i think. 75. Can you cook? yeah i love cooking but saddly don’t do much of it. 76. What are three things that you love? my teddy bear my momma got me for valentines day, my st. agatha figurine, and my yikes tapestry mary got me. i realize now after reading the next question you probably meant like shit in general so. the smell of a fresh cup of coffee, snuggly warm sweaters, postcards and tiny gifts from friends. you know the ones “i just got this for you because i thought you’d like it” 77. What are three things that you hate? funky ass attitudes, the smell and feel of lavender oil, corn. 78. Do you have more female friends or more male friends? female 79. What is your sexual orientation? i’m a big ole heterosexual. sorry to disappoint :/  80. Where do you currently live? the netherlands. 81. Who was the last person you texted? my friend and former roommate. today is her birthday. 82. When was the last time you cried? like an hour ago lmfao. 83. Who is your favorite YouTuber? i don’t have one haha. vevo i guess. 84. Do you like to take selfies? do i like taking them? not really. it takes me too damn long to get one that looks good enough. i like sending stupid selfies to friends though. 85. What is your favorite app? i use twitter probably the most but my favorite app is my spider solitaire game haha. 86. What is your relationship with your parent(s) like? we are very close. i would say both of my parents are my biggest supporters and cheerleaders but how they do that looks a bit different. my mom and i are very similar but sometimes how we handle certain things is very different so we can be the best of friends one day and the completely butt heads the next. 87. What is your favorite foreign accent? i loovveeeee a scottish accent and an irish accent. also tbrh i love a good southern boy drawl. like idk if i could play for you all the way this one dude who works with my mom talks? i would because i wanna bottle it and listen to it whenever i feel bad. 88. What is a place that you’ve never been to, but you want to visit? i would really like to go to norway for my birthday. 89. What is your favorite number? i don’t have one. 90. Can you juggle? nope but i did try and learn i have a video of it somewhere lmfao. 91. Are you religious? kind of. i’m more spiritual than religious and lowkey hate saying that because it sounds so hoitietoitie but it’s true. 92. Do you find outer space or the deep ocean to be more interesting? the ocean. so much of it we haven’t explored. thinking about space makes me feel existential and dead inside.  93. Do you consider yourself to be a daredevil? nah haha 94. Are you allergic to anything? yeah i’m supposed to take one claritin a day but like i don’t. 95. Can you curl your tongue? yeah 96. Can you wiggle your ears? nope :(  97. How often do you admit that you were wrong about something? i’ll admit i’m wrong if i’m actually wrong but you’re gonna have to a helluva lot of convincing to get me there lmfao. though if my being “wrong” has caused harm to someone else i’ll apologize quicker than lightning because the last thing i would want is for my stubbornness to hurt someone i love. 98. Do you prefer the forest or the beach? um the mountains 99. What is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you? "never turn down a date. you never know who you might meet while you’re out” -my grandmother to my mother to me. 100. Are you a good liar? lmfaooooo i am a reformed liar. 101. What is your Hogwarts House? HUFFLEPUFF BAYBEEE 102. Do you talk to yourself? yah 103. Are you an introvert or an extrovert? an introvert. i may be loud and talkative sis but i promise you i’m over compensating because i want you to like me lmfao. 104. Do you keep a journal/diary? i have a private twitter does that count. 105. Do you believe in second chances? depends. 106. If you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do?imma keep it real with you chief i would keeps the money lmfao. in the past i would’ve tried to return it to the owner but i am big broke bois with a lot of unexpected expenses coming up so like... yeah lmfao. we keepin that coint. 107. Do you believe that people are capable of change? sometimes. 108. Are you ticklish? yes lmfao 109. Have you ever been on a plane? yeah! 110. Do you have any piercings? yah i got my lobes pierced one on each ear, my nose, and a cartilage piercing. 111. What fictional character do you wish was real? my girl nancy drew. 112. Do you have any tattoos? yeah i got 2 of em. 113. What is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far? idk lmfao. probably when i applied for cityterm and when i appled to go back to undergrad. 114. Do you believe in karma? Yeah but not in a “oh you hurt me? you’re gonna get your come uppins” way but in a every action affects your soul and your being kinda way.  115. Do you wear glasses or contacts? im supposed to wear glasses but ask me if im wearing em right now lmfao. 116. Do you want children? presently i don’t see myself wanting or having kids but i want to foster. 117. Who is the smartest person you know? my friends lol. 118. What is your most embarrassing memory? literally every single memory has a tinge of embarassment lol. but probz when i walked into the cafeteria my first day of highschool as a smol freshman and my knees locked up and i fell forward and my giant ass backpack (because i never used my locker ever in any grade) wrapped around my neck and had me stuck in a strange position in the middle of the parting of the tables in the cafeteria.  119. Have you ever pulled an all-nighter? hell yeah lmfao. 120. What color are most of you clothes? blue or black 121. Do you like adventures? yeah! 122. Have you ever been on TV? yeah but like on the news and shit. 123. How old are you? 24 124. What is your favorite quote? i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart) 125. Do you prefer sweet or savory foods? OOF TOUGH BUT UHHH probz sweet. 

[ravenvsfox]

Can you do pynch for the ship thing please

YOU BET YOUR SWEET ASS I CAN 

(god FINALLY)

SEND ME A SHIP AND I’LL TELL YOU…

who is more likely to hurt the other?

I mean. Adam doesn’t usually get hurt by ronan so much as he gets annoyed. disappointed. pissed. He never lets ronan’s venom actually get to his veins, he’s too busy telling him how unnecessary the flash of fang is. ronan on the other hand. like. he’s easy to hurt. adam would never in his life want to hurt ronan (it’s his honest to god nightmare) but I think ronan works himself into such a despair at the smallest jealousies and perceived injustices that adam could make one careless comment and ronan would fixate on it

who is emotionally stronger?

ohhhh adam. it’s adam. He’s been dragging so much emotional rubble for so long that he’s built up a tolerance. strong is like The Most adam adjective that I can think of. ronan never had to get to adam’s level of detachment and dissociation bc the first 15 years of his life were gorgeous and easy, and he’s still growing into his protective shell. Adam had to be born in his

who is physically stronger?

it’s ronan tbH he has the upper body strength of a boxer and the broad shoulders of a lynch (but also adam has clever hands and muscular thighs from years of biking everywhere and he can handle himself)

who is more likely to break a bone? 

ouch. They’re both capital R Reckless when they’re together and they have some brutal years under their belts. adam has some poorly set knobbly fingers and ronan has an old snapped clavicle that took forever to heal and constantly bruised knuckles so like. idk. In the future, when adam parrish has escaped from his childhood prison, I’d like to think that they both get ugly minor injuries from doing joyful ramp and dolly and shopping cart type activities only

who knows best what to say to upset the other? 

surprisingly difficult question to answer bc I mean. It’s ronan. but is it? he systematically winds people up and adam is so deeply irritated by him that he straight up walks away, but also adam can be ice cold?? it’s so easy to get to ronan. They both fumble and call each other mean names when they want to compliment each other it’s a big mess

who is most likely to apologize first after an argument? 

holy shit would you believe neither??? the most stubborn humans on this earth!! record holders!! we got some emotional repression folks! hooooo boy

adam never starts arguments for no reason so he’s always thinking it through and coming to the conclusion that he’s in the right?? surprise he ain’t apologizing

meanwhile ronan can’t stop being cruel even though he knows it’s hurting people, it’s this vicious self-protective instinct that hurts so good and so wrong. and then his pride gets in the way once he’s cooled down. but he will come to st agnes on his knees and grab adam’s hand and try to make it clear that he’d step on his own pride on the way to adam’s door

who treats who’s wounds more often? 

sad & unfortunate :(( adam treats ronan’s solely bc ronan doesn’t know how the fuck to treat an injury and also ‘none of them wanted to hurt adam parrish’, so ronan’s got his stupid pointless anger related scrapes and adam’s got his anti-bacterial gel and they are a dream team

who is in constant need of comfort? 

neither of them come out on top here man. They’ve had some shared harrowing experiences, and some separate trauma that they’re trying to tell each other about (if their stories could just stop. sticking. when they try to say them out loud). in v different ways, neither of their families are families. Ronan doesn’t let himself fall asleep, and he doesn’t let himself go through things, and the repression starts to calcify into cruelty like it did right after his father died. adam can’t stop thinking about gansey on the roadside, and he can’t be touched some days, most days. he can’t stop swimming or he’ll die. He can’t keep swimming or he’ll die. The gangsey is a critical support system made of so many weak beams

who gets more jealous? 

are u fucking serious,,, it’s both of them pal. remember when every combination of his friends that didn’t include him made adam like. sick with jealousy. remember when ronan saw gansey talking on the phone with adam and wanted to put his hand through a wall. or when adam brought blue along on their quest and he spouted nasty shit the whole day. they both deeply want each others attention and they don’t seem to realize that they already have it? always?

who’s most likely to walk out on the other? 

ohh god. oh man. oh boy. Here’s the thing. adam’s gonna walk away from ronan, but he’s not gonna walk OUT on him. he’s going to walk away because he’s not on a leash, he’s gonna spread those beautiful fucking self-made wings. And ronan is too!! in his own time he’s gonna build his own spaces that aren’t the barns and he’s going to realize what home means to him and they’re both gonna walk out the door and back but never close it behind them

who will propose? 

a controversial topic! I’m on team adam for this one pals. I was on team ‘adam’s gonna kiss ronan first’ for a while before trk like a FOOL and I realized the error of my ways bc ronan is physical as fuck! and a risk-taker! of course he kissed adam smh. But a proposal? That’s a contract. That’s a speech. That’s a chess move. Ronan wouldn’t corner adam like that. Adam knows how ronan feels and more importantly he knows how HE feels himself, and I think one day ten years into their relationship the practicalities are gonna beckon and he’s gonna look ronan in the back of the head while he’s sleeping and roll over into the curve of his spine and tell him he wants a ring on his finger 

who has the most difficult parents?

omg... fuck off

who initiates hand-holding when they’re out in public? 

tactile bastards! both of them! ronan especially wants adam’s hands...., any which way he can get them. I mean. He will kiss adam’s hands when they’re at dinner at nino’s and he’ll hook their fingers together even for the 20 second walk from the BMW to monmouth’s front door like he LIVES FOR IT (adam feels nervy and exhilarated every time it’s gay)

who comes up for the other all the time? 

i mean they’re always together so they don’t really bring each other up. if they’re not together they’re with gansey/blue/henry or even fox way babes/vancouver crowd etc and those ppl get real tired of it real quick. adam usually keeps his ronan related musings to himself though like he has self-control unlike... R.N.L. himself

who hogs the blankets? 

ronan does tbh adam has never hogged anything in his life and ronan is a shit

who gets more sad? 

an unfair Q, man. They’ve both had a super rough time, especially right post-trk?? those few months are hard. Ronan cries a lot. Adam gets numb and far away a lot. They have a lot to be sad about. (But more to be happy about. They made it. They honestly just stare at each other and laugh breathlessly and touch foreheads and hands and scars and can’t believe their luck)

who is better at cheering the other up? 

I sorta said this with ronsey but I think ronan is THE BEST at doing dumb shit to take his mind off of things. Like all that stuff about making adam quiet and turning off the lists and anxieties in his head so that they can do smth mindless and dangerous? yeah that. memes and songs and poor decisions. depression whom?

who’s the one that playfully slaps the other all the time after they make silly jokes?

this never happens wtf they’re not really ‘playful slappers’ HOWEVER adam will glare at ronan so hard that it probably feels like a slap

who is more streetwise?

it reeeeally depends on your definition of streetwise?? Like if we’re talking survival it’s unquestionably adam. He can fix your car and bandage your wounds and figure out your taxes and make himself invisible and blend his accent into whoever’s around him. He’s wicked sharp and fast on his feet. But i mean. he can’t quite drive stick. and he wouldn’t be caught dead in the sort of underground that ronan ends up in. ronan is streetwise in terms of the actual street, and he knows the most brutal avenues a person can end up on, the real life nightmares that feel closest to the ones in his head. Ronan is smart enough to navigate the chaos, but adam is smart enough to avoid it altogether

who is more wise?

adam. easily. ronan is intelligent and instinctive and talented (or adam wouldn’t get him as well as he does) but adam is a genius and that look behind his eyes..... he’s lived about 1 billion times more than he should’ve by age 19

who’s the shyest? 

neither of them are shy exactly they’re just buried under 9 surface level personalities that you have to crack open with your bare fuckin hands

but if you met either of them in the hallowed halls of aglionby you would think adam was shy and ronan was a rampant fuckwad so based on appearance?? adam. he keeps his head down.

who boasts about the other more? 

as soon as adam is officially his bf ronan takes a ten year long victory lap he’s so embarrassing

who sits on who’s lap?

y’all. we all know ronan sits in adam’s. it’s a fact of life. he probably had a sexy dream about it when he was 17 and took his morning shower in holy water

[fuck-customers]

THE CUSTOMER. COMES. FIRST.

I work at a grocery store and was scheduled to attend self scan when I got this older middle aged maggot of a woman who lives in a perpetual state of wanting to feel wronged and offended. You know the type.

I was standing at my podium when a coworker walking by said something to me. I turned my head to reply and in the 5 seconds that took, this woman got all outraged that I didn't immediately notice she needed help. At least I assume that's what happened, because she did this super exaggerated wave coupled with a sarcastic "HelloooOOooOoo!!!!!" to get my attention. It was so over the top, you'd think she'd been having trouble getting my attention for 5 minutes. Also if you need help there's a button you can press that summons me over and it's harder for me to miss than you silently glaring at me or w/e it was she was originally doing to try to get my attention.

I went over and she was immediately like "How are you?" in this incredibly passive aggressive and almost accusatory tone. It was weird. I think she was angry at me for talking to my coworker for what was literally like 5 seconds? I could tell she wanted me to respond rudely so she'd have an excuse to flip out. I didn't take the bait and responded "I'm good! How are you?" Disappointed, she didn't bother to respond before jumping into the issue she was having. Basically, she just needed to scan a coupon, drop it in the slot, and then press the continue button. idk why she couldn't figure out how to do this herself, especially seeing as the machine was issuing directions, but I guess that's what I'm there for as far as she's concerned.

Problem solved, I went back to my podium. Then I had a different customer who needed help with something. As I was helping him one of the scan it gun alarms went off. At my store we have these scan it guns customers can use to scan their groceries as they shop, bagging as they go and then using the gun to pull their order up at a register or self scan machine. Customers get the guns from one of two charging racks on either end of the store but naturally they can't be bothered to actually return them to the rack despite the fact that they're located next to the doors that they exit through, BUT WHATEVER. So basically, self scan is located next to a charging rack and all the charging stations on that one are kept full by me but I can't run to the other end of the store every time a customer leaves one of the guns behind, so as I collect them off the machines I just put them in a hand basket. When someone comes round to do baskets they grab the basket of guns and put them in the other charging rack.

The guns are designed to go into an alarm mode if they're carried past the doors to prevent theft or being forgotten in carts. The only way to get the alarm to stop is to place the gun in a charging station. The alarm is LOUD and incredibly annoying by design. Whenever one goes off customers whip their heads around because they think someone's stealing or something. So needless to say, when a gun goes off dealing with it becomes a bit of a priority. It's disruptive, headache inducing, etc. For some unknown reason, a gun can randomly go off even if it's nowhere near the door. It happens maybe once a week.

That's what happened on this occasion. The customer I was currently helping was like "WOAH what IS that?" because it's so loud and annoying. I explained as I finished fixing his issue and then went to grab the gun to place it in the charging rack. The rack was full but fortunately there was a customer there about to get one and a spot would be freed up. So I was standing behind that gentleman, waiting on him, when I heard the woman from before trying to get my attention, her tone none improved. It was the same weirdly aggressive, overly exaggerated shouting, like "HELLLOOO I NEED HELP OVER HERRREEEE!!!"

I ignored her. I could have turned around and motioned that I'd be right with her or whatever, and for any other decent customer I would have, but not this woman. Like, anyone could see that I was clearly dealing with something and the alarm was loud enough to lend plausibility that I couldn't hear her. It was also only going to take like 10 seconds so I figured she could suffer the great injustice of having to wait. I was wrong. She came stomping over, furious, telling me that she needed help. I told her I'd be right with her once I put the ear splitting alarm emitting gun in the rack. She stomped back to the machine.

When I went over, she was PISSED. I can't even remember what the issue was this second time, but it was another simple fix. She demanded my name despite the fact that we wear very prominent name tags. I kept my tone light, acting like I was unaware of how angry she was. I think this made her angrier, lol. I told her my first name and she was like "[FIRST NAME] WHAT?" I wasn't about to give this woman my last name so I told her I was the only person with my name working at the store which seemed good enough for her, because then she moved on to being like "I WANT TO SPEAK TO YOUR MANAGER. WHO'S YOUR MANAGER?" I gestured out over the front end and told her anyone wearing a certain color uniform shirt, which is half true. Our supervisors and the front end manager all wear the same color shirt but the managers above that don't wear uniforms, they wear business casual. But I wasn't going to be like "Oh, today it's Rick~ Let me go fetch him for you~" Like, if this blight of a woman wanted to go complain about me she could do the legwork herself. I wasn't about to do her any favors, lol.

She paid and then stomped off to the customer service desk, where she encountered Diana. Now, none of the supervisors really take customer complaints seriously but Diana gives ZERO FUCKS. She has a policy that customer complaints stay with her. Unless the customer asks to speak to a manager above her and complains to them personally, no one higher up than her ever hears the complaint. She knows customers are full of shit 99% of the time. So she probably nodded and was like "Oh no! She made you wait 10 seconds? I'll have a word with her right away!" without actually caring.

I don't think the woman was totally convinced because on her way out she stopped by self scan to scold me herself. I can't even accurately describe her tone, but it had me half laughing at how outraged she was. She was like "[FIRST NAME]! THE CUSTOMER. COMES. FIRST." I told her there was an alarm going off that I couldn't just ignore. I think she was kind of caught off guard that I defended myself because she had the lamest response ever, which was something like "I! DON'T! CARE! NO ONE COULD HEAR IT BUT YOU!!!" Which was obviously untrue, lol. Like, no one misses that alarm unless they're hard of hearing or deaf. I don't think she was either, she just didn't know how to respond to logic.

Clearly she's incapable of realizing that she's not the only customer in a store and that most customers don't appreciate loud obnoxious alarms when they're trying to shop and speak to their cashier. I was putting the well being of the ENTIRE store first, requiring her to wait what amounted to SECONDS. I don't think I've ever encountered a more impatient and entitled customer before. Reading back on this story I don't think I'm really accurately capturing just how angry she was. She was livid. If she had the ability to fire me, I'm sure she would have. The way she was behaving was absurd.

Also kind of funny to note is that the first time I went over to help her there was a man with her who I assume is her husband. He disappeared as soon as she started freaking out, probably too embarrassed to stick around. And I realize the absurdity of all of this makes it sound like a fake story. You might already have thought to yourself "Okay, OP totally changed minutes to seconds to make them sound more sympathetic. They were probably talking to their coworker for a long time and ignoring the customer that needed help or they're leaving out some other really important detail" but no, it was literally seconds and I'm not leaving anything out. This woman became enraged because she had to wait literal SECONDS for my help, which she wouldn't have even needed in the first place if not for her own incompetency and incapability to follow simple directions.

I was actually really angry about this for like 24 hours after it happened. She was so abusive and outrageous. The way she used knowing my name as part of her power trip kind of grosses me out. Like ngl, I've done some stupid ACTUAL complaint worthy shit while working and have legitimately screwed up before without anyone complaining about me. So the one time someone DOES complain about me, it's over something totally petty? It's ridiculous. But I'm starting to find the humor in it.

This woman needs to get a grip and/or therapy for her anger issues. I bet she does this type of shit everywhere she goes with her husband noping out immediately and disappearing to the car.