#but also i am trying to be more offline and in touch with irl people <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[clerichs-xi]

high stakes

---

ocs are dante (he/him) on the left and cable zheng (he/him) on the right

[e77y]

relating to that vent, i getchu so bad. i feel like in general, the internet might worsen compulsions & obsession within ocd + etc. i have a similar feeling (wouldnt say identical cause i know u from tumblr n yaknow yaknow) that tells me everything i do needs to be 100% morally correct or [insert awful things] will happen to me or someone i love. and this is easier to deal with when you're offline, because there's a limit on the people that can get mad at you. half of the world won't get mad at you because only 0.00001% (or whatever) of the world knows you, yaknow. on the net, it feels like everyone who has an account knows you. your brain telly you anyone who has an account on here might see what you posted & they might be mad at you & they might make a callout post or whatever. even though they don't know you. which is a terrifying thought for many. i dont think youre alone in this, genuinely. and i feel it can be improved. some stuff that's helped me: - making separate accounts w private stuff (doesnt rly work on tumblr but like a private account on insta & etc etc) - rationalising thoughts (an example of this would be thinking: is it really likely many people will agree with someone being mad at me? or: how many people actually do see my posts? is that proportional to the amount of followers i have) - and talking ab it w friends. genuinely, the communication + processing of these thoughts & feelings is soo helpful. sending u soo much love <3 if u wanna chat a bit ab it you can dm me :) (ask can be published or responded 2 privately, whatever u prefer!)

Thank you so much for this message omg :’) ❤️❤️❤️❤️ So thoughtful. This made me tear up a little haha. I’m posting it here so I can look back at it later; hopefully that’s okay.

I’m really glad to hear other people feel the same way/have the same worry… like logically I know that it’s something a lot of people worry about, but idk; my brain has a way of convincing me I am the only person in the world who has done anything ‘bad’ ever LMAOO. So this was really nice to hear

Also I’m a very talkative person! Like I’m definitely an introvert, but I do like to talk about myself and my interests and my feelings etc. Especially when I have a forum (cough Tumblr) to post into the void 😭😭 So I guess that’s part of my issue; IRL, there are less people to be upset if I do/say something ‘bad’, and most of them are my close friends and know I don’t have bad intentions. But online, I walk on eggshells bc 1) strangers online DON’T know my intentions and 2) I just think my mutuals are really cool lol. So I don’t want to do/say anything ‘bad’ or even embarrassing in their presence yk? And online, their ‘presence’ comprises literally all the time w everything I post

I should probably make a more private account 😅 This one is kind of that (just bc it has far fewer followers than my other blog), and I have one on Instagram with like two people following it that I haven’t touched in a while, sooo maybe I will go back to that for more personal vents and whatnot 🫡 I try not to post anything TOO personal on Tumblr, anyway. I just also really like creating fan content, which sort of inherently puts me in a public space even if I don’t WANT to have an ‘audience’ (regardless of how small that audience is; ik there are people who look up to my writing, and that puts a lot of extra pressure on me, but I don’t want to stop writing, either…. Agh)

Idk this is probably overly personal and also very disjointed bc I just finished writing a 1,800 word essay and my brain is mush lol. I’m just sort of reiterating everything you said. Sorry for making you read all this lmao 😭🙏 But thank you for the kind words, seriously ❤️ I really really appreciate it :’D !!!!!!!

[hergan416]

Not me sitting here wishing to "make content" bc I'm lonely and this is how I know how to interact with people but the thoughts are slowing down and gradually requiring more effort and so I end up with more and more complex projects and then I start burning out from those projects and then I start procrastinating on tumblr and but it is unfulfilling for unknown (?) reasons (probably known if you understand social media) because it requires more and more effort to get The Dopamine or The Seratonin or whatever the fuck chemical I'm lacking that I'm getting here and so I rb some shit about creatives not needing to create to be Good but that doesn't help the lonely or the attention cycle and I probably should just Go Outside and Touch Grass (or dirt. idk if it is warm enough for grass yet) but when I do I've got all this in the back of my mind anyway so it's at best temporary distraction. And this sounds like horrible social media boundaries and it probably is but what do I do about it because I do want to share and talk about my thoughts and writing and I am genuinely excited about these things and god do a lot of you seem to like what I have to say and this is good right? You all enjoy my thoughts or I wouldn't have 100 note posts.

And so I try to talk about the overwhelm with real life people and it becomes a rant about how often I'm on my phone, how I always seem to be glued to it and like he likes my writing and thinks I'm talented but where does he think I go to have ideas? To exist and not feel like I'm just creating for no reason?? It's cultivated!

Where does he think my friends are? I do have irl friends but they don't fucking know me. Not like I am here. How many facets of myself can you all see when I don't have to be my legal name, when I can be a picture of a corrupted dragon, where I can be dark-tinged light and create fucked up shit and just vibe and sure there are antis but they don't seem so interested in attacking me because maybe I'm small enough maybe I'm authentic enough maybe I'm not as fucked up as I imagine.

So why would I not come here, like the people on that one world in Pendragon, slowly choosing to give up on the real world, moving to full-time VR because it's just better. I don't know the rules about how real life social interaction works (unless I am the Salesperson, because there is training on how to be the Salesperson), but here, there are guides for new users, there are carefully outlined trestices on tumblr etiquette, I know what to do and I have built myself up and I can make friends who will shift like the sands amongst work schedules and shared interests and levels of tolerance, but still remain all the same.

Why would I not go on my phone when life gets weird and I see a notification and I'm overwhelmed.

And yet. It is overwhelming in and of itself.

There is too much, until it isn't enough.

It's contradictory, and I am not built for it.

Touch some grass, eat some dirt, play a board game...I do that. I do experience life offline. I don't want to lose my online life completely though.

So...I guess I will flounder. Struggle. Set boundaries. Try new things. Create and not create and see what happens. Idk.

I don't have the answers. It's just frustrating some days to know what I promised and what I want to achieve and to know that as joyful as doing it is, it's also stressful. And it's not supposed to be stressful.

[tottwritesfanfic]

alright i want to apologise in advance a bit, because I recently tripped and fell into another BNHA fixation, and it's sorta getting in the way of my other stuff.

So. If I look as if I've jumped fandoms for the next however long...I really haven't. I just added to the pile, and I'm returning to my old VR AU because holy ensemble cast, it sure does scratch that itch.

...is it bad that ensemble casts are basically a prerequisite for any fandom I might get invested in enough to write for?

Anyway, not the point. The point is that I'm channelling my current obsession into NaNo this year (as co-ML for Kent's region I try to give it my all when I participate!), so I'm afraid everything else is probably not going to get much love for the next few weeks or so.

Probably. I know what I'm like, and I usually find it hard to stick to one project at a time, especially if I don't want to burn out. TBH, that's the other reason I'm doing this - so far, the only part of this AU i've posted is a standalone prequel fic which no one really cared about anyway because it had no ships. So if I burn out and this goes nowhere, at least I haven't left anyone hanging, right?

Also, if you want to take a peek at any of the decidedly excessive worldbuilding notes I've been putting together for the last couple of weeks, just hit me up. So far there's like...10k of it, including my musings on how the hell to turn quirks into VR hacks which make sense on a digital platform. Some of these are more straightforward than others, let me tell you.

I am also decidedly in love with how OFA/AFO works in this setting, but that's for me to know and you to find out if I ever get as far as posting this damn thing.

also also dropping this here because I can and it gives you a bit of an idea of the setting: In the AU, basically the surface of the planet got screwed over a couple of hundred years ago, and everyone lives underground, logging into a VR world where they can roleplay as pre-disaster humans for the sake of their sanity for their waking hours. Quirks are basically government-sanctioned hacks which people apply to their VR accounts, because ultimately it was easier to legitimise and legislate them than try and get people to stop doing that. A chief problem in the story is dealing with the fallout of an entire world of people who no longer remember how to touch grass. (It's a lot more serious than this, but basically my planning seriousness is inversely proportionate to the tone of the fic itself, and I just. I cannot talk about my work in any other way.)

Here's a snippet from my planning document to give you an example:

Aizawa is just a regular-ass dude who got his hero licence in spite of his Exploit rather than because of it. He’s also IRL ripped because his eye problems aren’t exactly conducive to 16 hours of screentime a day. This is why no fucker has heard of him, because all his heroics happen in short, irate bursts before he logs out to dose up on fucking eye drops.

His chief strength in this AU is not a borderline gamebreaking exploit, it’s the fact that he can, like, actually function in the real world a hell of a lot better than most folks.

Which meeeeeeaans, that he becomes 1A's teacher in the real world, after they all realise they need to buff up for this shit because they’re (mostly) totally clueless on how to function outside of the Interface. In this fic, UA is basically 1A's super secret offline school where they learn proper fitness and agility, and the physical, mechanical skills they’re gonna need in order to pull off the heist of the century. Hahaha, Aizawa is gonna be That Guy who is super strict about everyone’s screen time lmao.

[the-attic-in-ealing]

TW: talk of psychosis, trauma and abuses

I was not planning to post about this on Tumblr because I know how people react to these topics but I think it is important people are aware before interacting with me that I experience psychosis. I do not have schizophrenia, I have psychosis. Psychosis is its own disorder, separate from disorders commonly associated with it. My therapist and I believe my psychosis was caused by trauma and enhanced by my severe depression. I've been diagnosed for over 6 months now, and have been experiencing it for over a year. I began experiencing episodic psychosis back when I was 12, during an extremely traumatic and abusive relationship. My experiences with the pandemic and my mental health deterioration have only made it worse.

I experience mostly auditory hallucinations, as well as visual ones (and sometimes psychical feelings like being touched and grabbed) when my episodes are more prolonged or intense. My delusions include believing I am being stalked, or I am in very serious and specific danger such as being hunted by a vigilante (unlike my anxiety which is more general feelings of danger.) I do also experience Delusion Misidentifications (also called Delusion Attachments, both are medical terms) not only to animals and objects but also to characters. There are many characters who I experience DAs to, but the two most relevant to this blog would be Luke Smith and the Thirteenth Doctor. I will try to make it clear when I am experiencing an episode (usually through my display name) but here are some important notes:

I do not want my delusions to be fed into, please just avoid talking to me about them without consent/if we aren't close

If you reality check me without permission, I will block you.

If I need to experience a reality check for whatever reason, I will request it from one of my IRL friends, not a stranger from Tumblr (/lh)

Feeding into delusions can be just as harmful as reality checks, both can cause a lot of issues:

I can have breakdowns and panic attacks

It can become even harder to cope with an episode

I can become more paranoid

As well as a lot more things I don't feel comfortable sharing on here.

I'm okay with doubles (in the form of fictives or others with DMs) but please avoid things such as referring to yourself as the IRL of 13 or Luke, at least where I may see it. As I've already said, my psychosis is episodic. It isn't constant and I usually go offline during episodes but it is hard to identify them. Please remember my delusions are genuine beliefs I have in episodes, I cannot control them.

If you unintentionally disrespect a boundary, I'll gladly just remind you and move on. However, if I feel like you aren't taking my disorder seriously and continue to knowingly disrespect boundaries, I will block you.

Another note is that I am being medicated for my depression and since then my episodes have been less frequent and easier to identify. However, I want to do what I can to make people aware of the experiences of people with psychosis (especially due to all the misinformation out there.)

[thesunnyshow]

Name: hi, i am nyx  Age: 20 years old Writing Blog URL(s): jungcity.tumblr.com | v-asl.tumblr.com 

Nationality: filipino Languages: english, filipino Star Sign: pisces! MBTI: infp-t Favorite color: white accentuated by silver Favorite food: it’s sweet and spicy chicken garlic!! Favorite movie: hmmm, it’s prolly flipped because that movie was so cute :,)  Favorite ice cream flavor: rocky road!! Favorite animal: it’s gonna be cats!! although i love lions so much because of narnia :,( Coffee or tea? What are you ordering? coffee :,) Go-to karaoke song: i don’t sing agskh the world would end if i would 

What has been one of the biggest factors of your success (of any size)? i think it’s me writing about jaehyun??? since he’s the king of fanfiction, especially in ncity nowadays. 

What fandom(s) do you write for?  nct + wayv

When did you post your first piece? three days ago!! that would be august 4 i guess???

Do you write fluff/angst/crack/general/smut, combo, etc? Why? i don’t really much write fluff since i don’t have any idea how to write a good fluff!! :( this has been an issue every time i write some au’s. so im always ending up writing and focusing more on angst. it’s the genre i know best. well, crack… it’s hard to make the readers laugh when you can’t even make their tooth ache from sweetness with your fluffy writings. :( smut… i don’t write smut explicitly any more. i’m more on the suggestive side rn. 

Do you write OCs, X Readers, Ships...etc  i write OC’s especially when im writing a series!! to diversify my writing. but i usually am on the x reader side. ships? not that much. 

Why did you decide to write for Tumblr? uhm, back in 2017, i was searching for some website where i could publish my works. ive always been a tumblr-girl since i am that wanna-be-aesthetic kinda person :D then i had found that i could write and publish on tumblr so yeah that’s pretty much why i am on this app rn

What inspires you to write?  ooh, music has been a great help for sure!! whenever i don’t feel like writing something, i always listen to music and the idea would flow like a river. classic poems helps, too. :)

What genres/AUs do you enjoy writing the most?  supernatural!au’s, fantasy!au, medieval!au. i feel like it’s easier to write something out of pure fantasy. i have a hard time writing modern!au’s since i lack the humor and the knowledge for modern slangs. 

What do you hope your readers take away from your work?  ooh, i always always always am careful with the way that i craft all my works. i try to feel what my characters feel to give them a certain validation. i put my shoes on the scenarios i have in mind even though i haven’t yet experienced everything ive written. and i do love writing strong female characters, whether it’s oc’s or female readers. that’s my main priority whenever i write. and i want them to know that girls could do just as much everything boys could. women are powerful. 

What do you do when you hit a rough spot creatively?  i read a lot to get back on my foot. i also try to re-read my past works so i’d be inspired to better my writing on my current draft.

What is your favorite work and why? Your most successful?  my favorite work is the one i’m still writing rn, which is entitled 505. it’s a hendery fic in which he is a bandit and the female reader is a sacristan. it’s my fave since i relate myself so much to the female reader. :) my most successful one is the childhood best friends!au taeyong x female reader. it’s about to reach 600+ notes i guess? and im so grateful of all the feedbacks i got from it. 

Who is your favorite person to write about?  it’s jaehyun and hendery :) 

Do you think there’s a difference between writing fanfiction vs. completely original prose?  character wise, perhaps. since you already have a face value in fanfiction, but in an original prose, you would have to craft everything from 0. 

What do you think makes a good story?  a good story is something that doesn’t romanticize the bad things going on in the world. a good story is something that is emphatic to the hardships of others. a good story is something that gives comfort to those who are in the dark. a good story is something that boosts the hearts of the readers and makes them feel things!! 

What is your writing process like?  first, i think of a plot! (this happens oftentimes when im washing the dishes) when i have the plot, i think of the ending. when i have the ending, it’s time for me to device a fitting title. and the plot would develop from then on. 

Would you ever repurpose a fic into a completely original story?  i don’t think so… this is scary. since some people think of fanfics as delusional works from delusional authors. it’s kinda sad. 

What tropes do you love, and what tropes can’t you stand?  i love love love enemies-to-lovers trope!! one that i couldn’t stand and do my best to not read is probably… hmm… no, i love all tropes!! i just love e-t-l most!

How much would you say audience feedback/engagement means to you?  it means a ton. since it could really boosts me up. heavy sigh. it’s the best thing when you write something— the feedbacks. even though it’s a simple reblog with the ‘#ATKSHSKSHSKAHAKSGAHGEGSJA’ or ‘#myfave’. i would smile like an idiot whenever i read it.

Dream job (whether you have a job or not)? i want to be a successful writer someday!

If you could have one superpower, what would you choose? teleportation!! 

If you could visit a historical era, which would you choose?  ancient greek + victorian era

If you could restart your life, knowing what you do now, would you?  yes!! im so hell deep in indecision right now so i want to restart to make everything right

Would you rather fight 100 chicken-sized horses or one horse-sized chicken?  100 chicken-sized horses!!

If you were a trope in a teen high school movie, what would you have been?  enemies-to-lovers trope agsksj LOL

Do you believe in aliens/supernatural creatures?  YES!!! perhaps they are lurking somewhere here on earth and we don’t know it yet ;)

Fun fact about yourself that not everyone would know?  oh… i don’t really know what to write. i don’t give much attention to my personal details agsksj

Do you think fanfic writers get unfairly judged?  yes!! ugh, there’s this recent issue wherein stan twt called fanfic writers as freaks. and it broke my heart. i mean, most fanfic writers get inspirations from their idols and that shouldn’t be a bad thing. we aren’t delusionals as one might think. we are simply doing our craft. 

Do you think art can be a medium for change?  yes!! our country’s hero ‘jose rizal’ had somehow stirred the nationality of the people back in the old days because of his writings. i do believe that art changes things!! it has the ability to pierce the heart of the people.  

Do you ever feel there are times when you’re writing for others, rather than yourself?  yes. i feel this whenever im writing smut. i mean, let’s be real, your works would do better once you’ve included some steamy smut scenes in it. when i was writing my first fanfic after three years, i didn’t think that i’d ever include smut. but the fear of not getting feedbacks crept up in me, so i forced myself to write some sexy scenes. i know that’s like… weird. but i’m trying not to dwell on feedbacks any longer. and i also have decided not to write explicit smut anymore. honestly, i feel better now that i don’t force myself to do something that i think would please others rather than me.

Do you ever feel like people have misunderstood you or your writing at times?  uhm, as far as i can remember, nope— still hasn’t felt that way. :)

Do your offline friends/loved ones know you write for Tumblr?  yes!! my best friends irl knows about it. my sister knows. my parents are also aware of my passion in writing, and they do know that i write. but where and what, that remains obscured from them :D 

What is one thing you wish you could tell your followers?  that it’s okay to be vulnerable. it’s okay to make mistakes. it’s okay to fail sometimes. it’s okay to feel things. because like a good book, there is always a character development and you have the pen to write your own version of happy endings. 

Do you have any advice for aspiring writers who might be too scared to put themselves out there?  i’ve been there: the scared and conscious part. but one thing i would say is, you have to dare yourself!! you won’t know how your writing would have impacted so many lives and touch the hearts of people if you won’t grab your pen or your gadget and start your draft. 

Are there any times when you regret joining Tumblr?  nope, there aren’t. the community has been lovely to me ever since i started writing. :,)

Do you have any mutuals who have been particularly formative/supportive in your Tumblr journey? yes!! oh my god. i’d like to take this opportunity to thank my mutuals who’s done me nothing but kindness— @legendnct (hannah), whoo!! you know how much i love you, right? thank you for always being there to listen to me. :) @cloudysuh des, since day one you’ve supported me. i couldn’t ask for more. thank you for the never-ending praises, keyboard smashes, for the tags, and for always boosting me up. @bohoes georgie, you know i love you. since 2017 you’ve been with me— praising my works and supporting me. thank you. @cherr-e cherry!! thank you!! for teaching me how to better my writing. i hope endless happiness for u and please take care. @writermoon hello my babe!! thank you so much for reading my works with such vivid imaginations. i love you. @jaeyongf amy!! the bestest person :,) thank you for always leaving me feedbacks!! thank you for being kind to me. thank you for always supporting me. i love you guys so much and let’s be mutuals for a long time!! 

Pick a quote to end your interview with: 

“If the world hated you, and believed you wicked, while your own conscience approved you, and absolved you from guilt, you would not be without friends.” — Jane Eyre, Charlotte Brontë

[transrightsjimin]

I'm asking as a confused trans and gay person regarding some of your recent posts saying aphobia doesn't exist, etc. Do you consider asexual people to be inherently LGBT even if they are cisgender and straight (heteroromantic)? I don't want to discriminate at all, I'm just confused because I see people fighting on here all the time about whether aces are part of the LGBT community or not. Do you have some insight for me as an ace nonbinary person? Thanks in advance!

no it’s fine lol dw!

i’m not sure how to explain this w/o being too extensive in what i say bc i’ve talked about this before but more in private conversations (and maybe some rants in tumblr posts) nd i tend to ramble abt it.

first of all i do not actually like the common conception that there is one way to define LGBT or the idea that everyone should fall within that category term or not, for example because the English language is colonial and rigid and does not reflect on experiences of all cultures, bc being gay or trans are not distinctly different experiences everywhere while they would be divided into different categories. so whereas i was more insistent on saying ‘you must be gay / bi / lesbian / trans to be LGBT / suffer from homophobia or transphobia’ i’ve come to realize now that this argument is rather exclusive of many gender diverse identities that do not correspond to all experiences or cultures. so i will stay away from using that argument.

however, i am speaking from my experience with online LGBT and asexual communities and have seen how the latter has tried to force itself into the other. i think a large issue with the asexual and aromantic communities is that they are partially based upon the creation of AVEN, an online forum founded by a homophobic and antisemitic man, and partially (though related to the former) by just blatantly made up statistics and history. not once have i seen a good argument or research or even personal accounts that illustrate very well why aphobia is a thing. i am asexual myself but do not want to take the lack of discrimination i faced for it as proof. there have been accounts of ‘aphobic’ discrimination that are either 1. much more a general concern with the OP facing misogyny and girls being sexualized, 2. someone making a remark based on a misconception of OP’s experiences or 3. misappropriation of terms and applying them to asexuality, e.g. ‘corrective rape’ was coined to refer to (African) lesbians who were assaulted under the presumption that it would turn them straight. asexuals have appropriated this term years ago to claim asexual people face rape on a large scale because perpetrators try to force them into liking sex. some people don’t even know the original meaning of the term because of this. i’m also not a big fan of this new interpretation of the term anyway, because legit sexual attraction is not the main reasons people commit rape; it is to seek power. this kind of mindset of asexual people being inherently vulnerable to sexual violence due to lack of feeling sexual attraction is seriously harmful; in the crime show Law and Order SVU, a suspect was let off because some main character said the suspect was asexual and this couldn’t have done it. people can be and sometimes are raped by an asexual person, because it is about taking advantage of someone and not attraction. the sole fact that so many authors of overly fetishistic fanfiction are asexual should prove this much, but instead the lack of attraction is used to distance oneself from the harm one can still cause.

and yes, asexual people can face discrimination, especially if you’re a girl you’re expected to be sexually submissive, which is pretty horrifying on its own. but this is not the same as targeted discrimination on a mass scale or institutional whatsoever. we are not thaught as we grow old that asexuals are disgusting, are a joke, or need to be violently murdered. my biggest issue with the asexual and aromantic community that we (as i have removed myself from it years ago) keep telling it that anecdontal accounts of being mildly discriminated is nowhere near the same as risking being kicked out of your house, being violently attacked due to the way you appear or having a partner of the same gender, being systematically discriminated by all sorts of institutions in society and being thaught that what you are is bad from an early age on. and then the counterargument is that LGBT is more recognized but asexual and aromantic isn’t, so ‘ace / aro’ people deserve to be included because they are underrepresented in media. but that is not the case at all. the speed at which asexuality has suddenly been incorporated and included into LGBT spaces, also offline, has been ridiculously fast. nowadays when you see a bunch of LGBT flags you see the asexual one being included a lot, sometimes in 3 different versions, while the lesbian flag is nowhere to be seen. lesbians are consistently excluded from their supposedly own community and they are not included in LGBT due to a need to change underrepresentation or lack of awareness, but because they face their own version of homophobia. the most mind-boggling thing about cis / cishet asexual and aromantic people being told that they are not oppressed, is that the response is not relief (’oh i’m glad i don’t face systematic oppression for this thing’) but anger (’how dare you not let us into your group!’). LGBT is seen as a fun party that is unnecessarily mean to anyone it gatekeeps, as if it is not actually necessary to keep out cishet people who benefit from their privilege and can use that against the rest in the group if they join.

my largest issue with the asexual community however, and i’ve touched upon this a bit before in the post, is that it victimizes itself, to such a degree where it puts itself oppositional to ‘allosexuals’. the whole idea that people who experience sexual attraction to another person are inherently privileged over abd hold power over asexual people is just not true (and the same goes for this rethoric for aromantic people). this idea is so wrong and the whole concept of the ‘allosexual’ as oppressor collapses once you consider that people who are attracted to the same gender are actually in danger and oppressed for their very attraction. not only are those who experience attraction (that isnt platonic) to other people portrayed as oppressors, but also as perverted freaks. once i decided to stop associating myself with acearo people and instead interact with LGBT people with other experiences, i realized just how much stigmatizing abd frankly, homophobic and transphobic bullshit i’ve adopted within the spaces i used to be in and that i still see gather a lot of traction (now their harmful points are also used on twitter and IRL in the public domain). the community has a huge issue where it teaches you to be puzzled and grossed out by people who want to date / kiss / have sex with other people, and this results in GSAs that now include asexuals to prohibit kissing your partner per request of asexual / aromantic members, asexual people showing up at pride with ‘can we just hug?’ signs, the common serophobic jokes (’at least we dont get hiv!!’ blergh), and for me it led to a great discomfort with kissing and sex imagery and it wasn’t until i left the community that this was in fact subtle homophobia because so much content on here is lgbt themed and to combine that with the increasing aversion to romance or sex without critically looking at that is... very toxic to say the least.

so where it’s standing right now, i don’t think including asexual or aromatic people in LGBT spaces on the basis of those identities is a good idea. one community advocates for the acceptance of sex, whereas the other is stigmatizing it and painting off those who are in fact oppressed for their transness or homosexuality, as the oppressors. it clashes and it doesn’t work. the ‘ace / aro’ community (quote unquote bc i see ‘ace’ being used a lot to imply superiority over ‘allosexuals’ like, theyre being the ace at something) has too many issues, which it is largely based on, to figure out. it can be a community on its own and i do not think you need to join LGBT to have a valid identity that has something to do with sexuality or gender and deals with a form of stigma.

it woukd be a rant, i warned you lol

[scourgethewhorehog]

long post abt social spaces specifically online and offline, unrelated to any recent events so don't put words in my mouth it just is part of me reflecting on trauma shit+ journaling + understanding why i lacked boundaries for so long and trying to sympathize with why other people may Also lack boundaries even if it doesnt , excuse certain shit

man does anyone else realize that condemning people as evil or dismissing them or insisting they are inherently bad to continue existence in a way they feel doesnt align to their worldview for things that dont actually cause harm on other people and are actually decent outlets to redirect traumatic experiences n passing judgement on them to the point theyre isolated to an incredibly small group of people to seek acceptance actually makes everyone worse off

and makes people question themselves and their morals to the point they eventually give up on trying to be a good person and actual bad people use this to infiltrate these groups of rejected traumatized people because of this us vs them mentality that comes from being rejected by wider society both by virtue of a lot of these ppl experiencing irl oppression 98% of the time and also have to deal from rejection even from any support group they may have to help them deal with very real life issues because everyone is inventing online problems and reasons to ostracize people more for like what for power for feeling like theyre better themselves in the face of all they also face in real life...

anyways this is just me thinking of how many people i see from a distance that have so much common ground with me and otherwise would be fine to be around but would hate me for being like a dirty evil queer with the kind of autism that isnt cute enough for tiktok who doesnt understand social cues or having the wrong kind of system or too bizarre of an identity as it is so when someone who comes along that checks so many of the boxes of just at least not fucking hating you you put up with So much shit. and thats what lead to like half of the abusive close relationships we've been in babey!

and when you talk to people outside of these circles, trying to get away from all the people who hurt you in them, there is subtle victim blaming, recovery spaces admonish you for having been in these spaces in the first place, insisting if you hadnt been who youve been you wouldnt be around these Inherently Bad people....

it doesnt help that in real life we did Everything right to not be the Bad Child, never dyed our hair until recently when we had enough, and never spoke out and paid all our bills on time and most gay people are disgusting perverts but youre quiet enough and never come out to your parents friends and never are too loud about it even if youre dying inside and want to cry when you have to say your partner is just your friend whose coming over because its a death sentence, god forbid we get into gender because even if we're trans in the end its just some sort of dykefag anyways and nothing gets acknowledged except the same imagined scenario of like. being a dirty depraved sex pervert even if you struggle to touch other people and are terrified to tell anyone about that.

being an assumed danger to other people no matter how harmless you are sucks. its like, i come online to all these people where, at surface level expression, maybe would like me, because physically everyone near me wouldn't if i was half honest, but i'm still too much for them too now and i'm left feeling exactly like i do day to day. the internet isn't really escapism anymore its the same shit with a new coat of paint. i go through life thinking these people are good people and would be cool in any other circumstance, and i wish them the best, but the minute i am me i am a problem and something is wrong and all the kindness and good will they have and their favorite dessert and birthday and the things i recognize of them and love and care about wont matter anymore because i stopped being a person to them, and it happens to me online now too! and that sort of blows but at least i actually have real friends now who are like family and ill count my blessings on that.

[mommysites884]

Reviews On Blk Dating App

BlackPeopleMeet review will help you knowing some important criteria, including features, pros, cons and more Read our experts and customers reviews, compare with other dating sites and apps or find an alternative. For Black & Interracial Dating. Elite Singles doesn’t share its membership demographics, but we’re willing to bet it has a sizable African-American following. As a general dating site and app, Elite Singles supports a diverse crowd of singles with different backgrounds and values — but very similar life goals.

Reviews On Blk Dating App Reviews

Blk Dating App Online

Lia & Fahad

Zoosk inactive profiles. On the whole, the process of online dating is a great thing.

Singles dress up their bios with pithy zingers in an attempt to match with other bae-less individuals. Sometimes this pairing leads to an awkward exchange. Or, if both parties skip the coy act, it leads to a pre-first date.

Plenty of Fish Online Dating Women Not to Date List updated their profile picture. April 10, 2017 If you have had a bad experience with an individual on the Plenty of Fish online dating site, please JOIN THE YOUTUBE GROUP and add their user name and help guys everywhere out. Why online dating is good. It’s interesting how, with certain patterns, you can make a great online dating profile.I spoke with Whitney Perry, the founder of the Single Online Dating Guide, who shared a great analogy.If you are wearing a dress that has zippers up the side, you can show what the dress looks like in a different way to different people by zipping it up a bit. What to say online dating first message examples. Online dating to do the job. Your credit can never be overlooked when paying for your dream date. And you can always share what you have to offer – be it a good job, professional skills, bank balance or kids. Because dating is meant to be fun. Never online date on an office computer: Keep your personal life and your office life separate. Remember you company will have access to anything you do on their equipment. Don’t get seduced in online “shopping”: Beware of juggling too many people at the same time. While it’s perfectly okay to go slowly and initially see more than one. Dating can be expensive, and no guy wants to break the bank and go to fancy. Online dating do not date list.

As a black woman, however, trying to find love online isn't so simple. I've hit a few road blocks.

You see, it's an established fact that dating for black women is terrible. On dating apps, which were created to increase the chance of finding love, prejudice abounds.

OkCupid data shows that 82 percent of non-black men are prejudice against black women in some form, and I've found that to be true. My non-black friends typically receive right swipes from every Tom, Dick and Harry. Meanwhile, I can only guarantee matches with the Jamals and Akeems of the online dating world.

It's no secret Bumble and the like are largely used by non-black romance-seekers, therefore my chances of finding the one, if I want a black husband, are slim. This trend also makes BlackPeopleMeet, SoulSwipe and BAE (Before Anyone Else), a new dating app specifically made for people of color, absolutely necessary.

Brian Gerrard created BAE in April 2015 (along with his brother Justin and friend Jordan Kunzika) after seeing the racial disparities in digital dating. Scarred from their own letdowns, they wanted to stack the odds in favor of black singles.

Because of a few failed rounds of my own with Plenty of Fish, I'm averse to finding a boo online. Still, I downloaded the app to see if I had a better chance of snagging an eligible suitor.

As I expected, matching was easy.

The 'find a bae' formula? Spot a fine guy and swipe right. Sprawled across my bed, I signed up via my Facebook profile and the app automatically plugged in four profile pics. I don't know how BAE knew to use my super-cute selfies, but I wasn't complaining.

Basic stats like the city I live in, my age and occupation were also automatically filled in. I skipped over the whole 'witty bio' thing, then got back into the groove and browsed through my colorful options.

I was looking for medium brown-skinned cuties who were at least 5-foot-10 and had decent jobs. I'm also a sucker for well-lit photos and a smile. If you can't even find good lighting, a date with me certainly can't save you.

After I swiped on a few fellas I thought would be entertaining, it didn't take long for the match notifications to start rolling in. There were also a few non-people of color profiles, like one from a Channing Tatum lookalike I swiped right on. But, mostly I stuck to swiping right on black men.

Silver singles dating site cost. Altogether, I racked up 28 matches over two days. Not too shabby.

But, the messages were still awkward.

There I was, poised to reply to 28 matches I'd gotten based on mindless right-swiping.

I wasn't necessarily shocked at the amount of replies, though, because connecting with black men online is truly as simple as the click of a button. The problem boils down to interest beyond superficial physical attraction, like a connection based on chemistry and correctly spelled words.

Reviews On Blk Dating App Reviews

Most conversations started off as casual small talk, but quickly became banal. The worst of them revealed just how awkward and unfunny men can be toward women they don't know.

Don't get me wrong, some standout guys were pleasantly sweet. But, the fact is, I just don't enjoy inorganic interactions. I prefer reading a person's vibes IRL, striking up an easy exchange over Jameson shots or meeting in the pasta aisle at Whole Foods.

Additionally, men tend to be way more predatory behind the safety of a computer screen, which completely turns me off to digital dating.

Ultimately, I want to find bae offline.

While I love the fact that black women have tailored dating options with this app, it's just not my thing.

Online dating, as an idea, is cool. Even Twitter can double as a dating site if you play your DMs right. But, the cheesy lines about how gorgeous I am and the guy who spelled 'together' as '2gether' reaffirmed my deep disdain for finding a mate online.

If I have to weed out f*ckboy BS, I prefer to do it in person. However, if I ever venture back to the Internet for a date, I'll stick to the kind (like BAE) with less racial bias.

Blk Dating App Online

Overview

BLK is a newcomer in the world of online dating, which aims at creating a friendly and genuine community for black women and men to connect based on kindred interests and likes. The community of black is full of different characters, and the BLK was designed with this thing in mind. You can take advantage of this dating app to get in touch with like-minded people and find your connections.

Since its launch and introduction on the market, the BLK dating app has evolved and grown its user base, which is elite to black singles living in Canada and the United States. Thanks to its stringent registration procedure, you are certain that the majority of its users are authentic and have quite genuine intentions for using the app.

You were wondering how does BLK work? Just like most other dating apps available out there on the market, all you need to do is to swipe right if you like someone or swipe left if you don’t like it. You can even tweak settings for what and who you’re looking for. If your interest is to meet black singles, then it’s definitely the right choice to find your connection and start chatting with other like-minded singles. For that, all you have to do is to BLK app download today to explore who’s around you and looking for matches like you. One thing is certain that BLK experience will be great for you if you would like to meet and connect with black singles near you.

[illgiveyoumygavichal]

Yo, thanks for coming at me with a civilized explanation, I really appreciate it. And I agree, my word choice throughout the whole ordeal was absolute shit and there's no excuse besides my own inability to properly voice my thoughts without forgetting what I'm writing as I'm writing it (I actually have a condition that affects my brain aside from the years of depression.) Although I agree that you shouldn't have used race as an example because I also blame the bad eggs within my race for why we're still not being taken seriously, but I also blame the whites for letting the bad eggs define the rest of us. But race isn't why you msgd me. I am sorry for seeming albeist. I am still learning how to interact with my brother and other autistic people without being offensive but what my bro and other autistic people I've spoken to irl find offensive vs what online autistic people find offensive are a touch different and requires a bit more references than what I have to properly respect both online and offline communities. (Like my bro and I get on eachothers nerves like normal siblings but we also know when to draw the line and we're both working on how to talk to each other when either of us do something not nice. But I can't extend that to other people so I clearly need more practice.) Although you shouldn't just call me out on albeism because a good portion of replies or comments directed at me often used the r slur, and a lot of the exclusionist blogs I went through used the r slur without censoring and with them allistic. I, so far as I'm aware, haven't used a single offensive slur towards these exclusionists. It was mostly my failure of wording and impossibility to properly and respectfully voice my thoughts that made me appear ableist. And you're right about the trigger thing as well. I know I personally, actually, have triggers and I know I deal with them differently from others (I try to expose myself to my triggers often so that I can develop a resistance to them, but others cant do that.) I should have been more respectful of that too, and I am respectful of that towards the people I know and the people who haven't done anything wrong. I cannot respect these people that went after me without trying to understand my thoughts, especially when I am aware of the brunt of what the lgbt community. They attacked me thinking I hadn't a single clue about what the lgbt community has gone through when it was me being aware of both the outside and inside groups surrounding this problem that made me speak out. I think my thoughts were that I thought the groups within the lgbt community were better than fighting against each other but because I spoke out against a tumblr group notorious for hating other groups within the lgbt+ community they immediately turned around and took my words as attacks against the entirety of the lgbt community when I was just talking about their group singularly. I even made a post or two stating that I was only after the one group. At the end of it all, I should have just ignored them - they're just a few small negative voices among waves of positivity and I shouldn't have let their negativity get to me. However, this is no excuse for my shit word choice and I promise to learn from my mistakes to do better. I also hope this reply is clear and properly voices my thoughts, my mind was kinda wandering as I was writing and I can't say for certain that this represents the entirety of my thoughts.

[claudeleonca]

How to Build a 6-figure Community Around Your Blog

You have been misled. We have been misled.

In a social media dominated world, we’ve been sold the idea of building millions of followers.

That’s how we become successful. However, MOST people will never accomplish that.

I recently re-read an article by Kevin Kelly entitled 1,000 true fans and it brought me back to reality.

The premise is as follows:

If you can get 1,000 true fans to spend $100/year with you, you have a 6-figure income. He also breaks it down in the following ways:

Can you get 1,000 true fans who are willing to spend one day’s wages with you? If so, you have a 6-figure income.

Can you invest in people enough to earn one true fan every day? If so, you can have a 6-figure income in only 3 years.

The beauty of this concept isn’t in the numbers 1,000 or $100. In fact, if your true fans are willing to spend $200 with you, you only need 500.

Listen to the Episode

To go along with each post on this blog, there's actually a podcast episode, where I go more in depth. Listen to that episode by pressing the play button below. Also, consider subscribing in iTunes for more value.

What is a true fan

Kelly’s definition of a true fan is so good, that I’ll just quote him:

“A true fan is defined as a fan that will buy anything you produce. These diehard fans will drive 200 miles to see you sing; they will buy the hardback and paperback and audible versions of your book; they will purchase your next figurine sight unseen; they will pay for the “best-of” DVD version of your free youtube channel; they will come to your chef’s table once a month.”

The goal of this post is to twofold:

To break down how to get 1 true fan – someone willing to spend $100 with you every year.

To break down how to grow a community of true fans – so that they will remain true fans.

To break down what it takes to earn $100 from each fan

Am I at that point myself? Not quite. I don’t have 1,000 customers. However, in growing my blog to where I’m able to sustain my family well, I’ve learned a lot.

In part, I’m posting this to remind myself of what I need to do more of. The hope is that you can learn from me as I share my thoughts. And that you can feel empowered to grow your own 6-figure community.

Create good content for a targeted niche

Create good content for a targeted niche

This is something you’ve probably heard a lot. Narrow down your niche. It’s often said from the perspective of getting exposure in what would be an overcrowded space.

If you try to attract everyone, it would be harder to gain traction because of all the competition that exists. But I’d like to reframe that for you.

It’s not just about getting traction. It’s about being able to serve unique individuals in a way that big corporation can’t. It’s about getting to touch the life of one person in a unique way. And doing that over and over for the people who identify with your message.

Niching down is a way of serving at a deeper level. And doing that will make it easier for you to build that community.

Stand up for (or against) something and make it clear

I stayed in a hotel recently and when leaving I saw something interesting. There was a minivan with a sign that said Trump for president: Make America Great Again. On the opposite side, there was another sign that said Hilary for Jail.

Stand up for something and make it clear

Without getting political, I must acknowledge that Trump succeeded in an interesting way. He got people to rally around the concept of making America great again. And strengthened his community by having them rally against a specific person.

Now, this isn’t a discussion about politics. But there are lessons to be learned here. Rally your community by standing up for something. And even more powerful – rally them around standing up against something.

For you, it may not be a person. It may be a concept or even a movement. It may be that you believe that social media is the bane of our existence. Or that people who kill animals for food are doing something terrible.

Or, you may be tired of how much sugar companies put in our kids’ meals. Whatever it is, stand up for (or against) it. By having those shared values, you give people something to rally around.

Share your genuine and authentic self

Share your genuine and authentic self

If someone comes to your blog and it’s only a bunch of technical information about your niche, you lost. That’s information that they can get anywhere on the net.

And with so many blogs out there in just about every niche, you need to create something different.

Want to know what’s different? YOU are. So share you. Tell your story. Share your authentic self. Because if they see you and identify with who you are, they will be more likely to connect with what you do.

Show up consistently in multiple forms

Show up consistently in multiple forms

The internet has become more dynamic over the last few years. Online video is the bulk of what we consume online. Social media has made it possible for us to connect in all kinds of ways. Stories help us to easily engage our community.

Get out from behind your blog and start showing up consistently on multiple platforms in multiple ways. The more they are able to connect with you in different places, the more you’ll become a part of their lives.

It’s not about trying to be everywhere. It’s about trying to connect in different ways. Choose what those ways will be for you and show up.

Have community lingo

Language is a powerful thing. I speak Dutch, and whenever I’m out in public and hear someone speak Dutch, I feel an instant connection.

Have community lingo

Shared language is a powerful connector. And it’s why so many popular books come up with named theories and concepts.

Because if they can get us to start using their lingo, there will be a stronger connection. How can you create lingo that’s unique to your community?

What processes can you describe and name? Come up with a few and be consistent with using them in your community.

Teach them how to use your newly described processes and get them bought into your lingo.

Connect with individuals

This is one of the most powerful things you can do to strengthen your connection with your community. Connect with the individuals in your community.

It’s not all about the big email lists. It’s not about the thousands of subscribers. It’s about the connection that each individual feels to you and your community.

How will they feel that connection? When YOU actually connect with them. Here are some of the things you can do:

When someone comments on your blog, reach out to them personally. You can do this even when they comment on your social media posts.

Randomly reach out to individual members of your community just to check in on them.

Call them by name in different ways. Whether that’s on your podcast, in your videos, or simply in your social media posts. There’s something special about hearing (and seeing) your name.

Here’s the magical part – this works best when you have a small community. In that way, the small is actually an advantage.



Have a place online for members to connect

It’s great when people are able to connect with you. It makes them feel connected. But you know what makes it even more powerful? When they are able to connect with each other.

Have an online place to connect

There are a number of ways you can do this. Here are a few:

Introduce people to each other one-on-one. Do you know someone who would be a great connection for someone else in your community? Introduce them via Social Media or DM.

Start a Facebook group. This is a great way to build a community in a place where people are. And with all the recent changes Facebook has been making, now is a great time to start one. They are focused on promoting groups. Ride the wave.

Invite members of your community onto a FB live and have other members in your community ask them questions. I’ve seen business partnerships start this way. Very effective.

Have live group calls where community members get to interact with each other.

Random Acts of Kindness

Have you ever been a recipient of a random act of kindness? How did it make you feel? Let me guess . . . AWESOME!

Do unexpected acts of kindness for others and be surprised at the results.

Well, have you been on the giving end of a random act of kindness? How did that make you feel? Let me guess . . . MORE AWESOME!

There’s something about doing something unexpected for someone else that brightens the world.

And when it’s unexpected, it’s remembered. And when it has that kind of impact, people feel more connected.

Start doing this unexpected acts of kindness for others and you’ll be surprised at the results.

Go offline

I know, I know – it’s awesome to be able to build a community without having to leave your home. The internet gives us amazing ways to connect with others and it’s just awesome.

But I gotta tell you, the best connections happen in person. As your community grows, start having in-person meetups. I’ve done a handful of these, and they do wonders for solidifying connections.

So come out from behind that computer screen and engage people in real life. Host your own meetups. Join other meetups. Network IRL.

And if you can facilitate other people connecting in person, you just took your community bond to the next level.

Have enough to sell

Have enough to sell

I left this one for last because its success depends on the strength of the community you built. Going back to the original equation, if you get 1000 to pay you $100, you earned $100K.

Well, in order to do that, you need to have stuff to sell, and it needs to be enough to equal $100. What are you creating that’s valuable enough that people are willing to part with cash to get?

If you haven’t gotten to this stage in your business as yet, start working towards it.

Let’s wrap this up

So there you have it. Those are some practical things you can do to build a 6-figure community around your blog.

Do you need to do all of it? Nope. In fact, you can succeed by focusing on one of these tactics and going deep.

The main thing I want you to understand is that it’s very possible to accomplish. So, get to work, build your community, and grow your business.

By the way, let me know how you plan on building your community in the comments.

Resources Mentioned

1,000 true fans by Kevin Kelly

Infographic

[Infographic] How to Build a 6-figure Community Around Your Blog

The post How to Build a 6-figure Community Around Your Blog appeared first on Become A Blogger by Leslie Samuel.

from SEO and SM Tips https://www.becomeablogger.com/26772/build-a-tribe-around-your-blog/

[type2diabetestreatments-blog]

Saying Goodbye to Pioneering Diabetes Advocate David Mendosa

New Post has been published on http://type2diabetestreatment.net/diabetes-mellitus/saying-goodbye-to-pioneering-diabetes-advocate-david-mendosa/

Saying Goodbye to Pioneering Diabetes Advocate David Mendosa

We referred to him as a "father of the Diabetes Online Community," and anyone who’d ever known or connected with him felt the passion to help that burned beneath his kind and gentle spirit.

It’s no exaggeration to say that David Mendosa was one of the top diabetes writers in the world, a journey he began after his type 2 diagnosis in 1994.

Sadly, our D-Community is now mourning this lost friend from Boulder, CO, who passed away on May 8 as a result of an incurable form of cancer diagnosed in April. He was 81, and in his last email update sent out only a week before his passing he quipped, "I am glad to be able to write that this type of cancer is not one of the many complications of diabetes.”

A third-generation Californian who moved to Colorado in 2004, he was born in August 1935 under the name Richard Alexander Mendosa; he went by "Dick" until the mid-70s and later "Rick," until he legally changed his name to David in 2005.

Those who knew David on any level describe him as not only kind, gentle and compassionate, but informed and educated with a quick wit and a love for nature and the outdoors. His email newsletters over the years mixed diabetes info with reports on bird watching and reports on other animals and plants.

“David's knowledge and generosity are widely known and serve even after his passing as a model for all who would venture into the digital world to share their experiences with others,” said D-Dad Jeff Hitchcock in Ohio, founder of the Children With Diabetes organization and one of the original DOC’ers alongside David back in the mid-90s. “He was diligent in research, precise in language, and gentle in all his work. A tall man, he towered over most of us, but not because of his height -- rather, because of his kindness. David Mendosa's voice and spirit will live on forever in the digital world he helped to create.”

An Original Forefather of the DOC

As noted, David was a pioneer and a sort of godfather of the Diabetes Online Community (DOC), having started his patient-led informational site back when the Internet was still in its infancy.

Jeff Hitchcock describes the summer of 1995 as a time “when the World Wide Web was just emerging from the confines of university laboratories” and there were only four sites devoted to helping people with diabetes: the now-defunct Diabetes Knowledgebase at the University of Wisconsin, Madison; Jeff’s Children With Diabetes forum; the Diabetes Monitor by Dr. Bill Quick; and David Mendosa’s hailed On-line Diabetes Resources. (Yes, kids: there was a time when online was hyphenated!)

“In those early days... David, Bill, and I developed a unique kind of friendship -- a virtual friendship born of the Internet,” Jeff tells us. “We got to know each other first through email and only later in person when we would meet at diabetes conferences. Before all-knowing search engines like Google, we shared new finds like treasure, sending each other emails to help spread the word to the readers of our three web sites. Unknowingly, we laid the foundational bricks to what would become the Diabetes Online Community.”

David's Diabetes Directory remains online as one of the largest collections of its kind, comprised of all kinds of online diabetes sites and blogs and 1,000+ articles he's put his name to over the years.

You name it, David wrote about it on his own site, through his 12 years at HealthCentral and many more spots online and offline – writing on everything from diabetestechnology and new medications, to diet and complication stories and the mental health aspects of living with this condition, not to mention his own personal anecdotes. He always embodied the “Your Diabetes May Vary” mindset, embracing our D-Community’s differences, while happily sharing his own approaches and insights. And he was not afraid to change his mind and his approach if he felt it warranted.

Impressively, he actually lost an incredible amount of weight -- going from 312 pounds to 168 pounds, or nearly half his body mass! -- in the course of a couple years, and he was so impressed with the new drug Byetta that he wrote a book on it. That led to him also focusing on his diet, and becoming one of the early adopters of low-carb eating a decade ago after initial skepticism about the eating trend, and it was through his writings that many found the courage to at least try it out (myself included).

From his personal musings, it’s always funny to read David’s recollection that “the World Wide Web tricked me," as he didn’t think it would ever take off. It’s also fun to look back on how nearly 20 years ago, when he was writing for the few existing D-publications both online and offline, the American Diabetes Association once dubbed him “a noted Internet observer.”

Certainly, David was larger than life in our D-World and close to our hearts.

Connecting with People… and Finding Love!

Interestingly, it was through the early DOC (as it existed in forums and message boards back then) that David met his wife, Catherine. He shared that story a decade ago in a blog post, writing that he’d turned to the Internet just a month after his T2 diagnosis and eight months later through a message board, he connected with the woman who would eventually become his second wife. He also shared the heartbreaking story of Catherine’s death in 2007.

That blog post at HealthCentral was how longtime type 1 and diabetes journalist Ann Bartlett in the Washington D.C. region first met David, who would become a dear friend and mentor through the years.

As it turned out, her very first blog post set to publish was delayed – because David’s wife had passed away, and he wrote the tribute to her for that day. She remembers seeing the D-Community's response over someone they’d never met, and from that day she fell in love with not only the DOC but his writing style.

“I found myself laughing, feeling frustrated and completely in sync with many of his struggles and it became crystal clear that his view of living with type 2 diabetes had many similarities to my own dilemmas of living with type1 and I quickly got in his blog boat and grabbed an ore,” she said. “David greeted anyone willing to stand up and be a voice in the diabetes community with love and respect.”

Through it all, David’s love for writing abounded. He pondered retirement last year, Ann recalls, but said there was still so much he wanted to write about and wasn’t willing to give that up.

David greeted anyone willing to stand up and be a voice in the diabetes community with love and respect. Ann Bartlett, friend and fellow diabetes writer

Beyond Diabetes – Early Life, Outdoors

Beyond diabetes, David's life was just as amazing -- and like any proud journalist, he chronicled his own story in various articles and photo essays.

In his younger years during his late teens, he started out working for the Riverside, CA, Press-Enterprise newspaper as an assistant sports editor. He soon enlisted in the U.S. Army in his early 20s where he worked for their Public and Troop Information Office and as a correspondent for the Overseas Weekly briefly during his service. He then returned to California where he studied political science and served on the college paper at UC Riverside. After getting his master’s degree in government from Claremont Graduate University, he went to work for the U.S. government for as a foreign service officer in D.C. for 11 years and then four years in Africa.

After that, in what he dubs his "radical years," he dabbled in real estate sales and computer and small business consulting before turning back to journalism in the 1980s with the Hispanic Business Times – all before diabetes entered his life and he turned to that in the mid-90s.

Tied into his own diabetes management but also embracing his love for the outdoors and nature, David was an avid hiker and outdoorsman who snapped beautiful photos during his many travels -- and yes, he also wrote about that on a Fitness and Photography for Fun blog! Being a practicing Buddhist also gave David a unique mindfulness, and it was one that he often brought into his own diabetes writing when exploring meditation’s effects on BG management, or just embracing a calmness in approaching one’s health and life overall.

Thank You, David!

“His loss to our community is immeasurable, but he gave us a tremendous gift of leaving behind years of research, education and inspiration. He will always be a gift of inspiration for me,” Ann says.

Tributes to David have been popping up all over the DOC – from forums like dLife and TuDiabetes, tributes at HealthCentral and Diabetes UK, to a blog post by T2 peep Bob Fenton, and numerous comments being shared on his CaringBridge page, where David began writing about his cancer journey in April.

We echo the sentiments about his compassion and caring attitude and his institutional knowledge of anything related to diabetes.

Personally, I recall first stumbling across David’s writings back in the very late 90s during my college years. Once I began reading blogs and connecting with others, his name was always top of my daily reading list. And then, I recall reading about that very first Roche Social Media Summit in 2009 and eventually attending the second summit that following year, and being able to meet this rockstar IRL. I’m humbled and blessed to have kept in touch through the past several years, and share stories both personal and professional beyond just diabetes.

Another long-termer in the DOC, David Kliff in Chicago who began publishing Diabetic Investor in 1997, has known David through the years and recollects:

“What I remember about him most was that he was a true gentlemen and old-school journalist who didn’t mind helping a newbie,” Kliff says. “It was ironic that over the years our roles reversed and it was my turn to help him, which was a pleasure to do. David was a great guy and tireless advocate for patients with diabetes. He sought the truth and investigated everything fully before writing. David understood diabetes wasn’t about the toys we use or the drugs we take, but the people we are.”

In keeping with his wishes, David’s family updated his CaringBridge page to reflect that there will not be a service of any kind. However, anyone who has “journeyed with him” at any point is encouraged to donate to CaringBridge in his memory or to the Colorado-based TRU Hospice Care Center that took care of him in the later days.

David, we will miss you so incredibly much and are honored to have known you through the years. Thank you for all you did for this world and our D-Community! Rest in Peace, Brother.

Disclaimer: Content created by the Diabetes Mine team. For more details click here.

Disclaimer

This content is created for Diabetes Mine, a consumer health blog focused on the diabetes community. The content is not medically reviewed and doesn't adhere to Healthline's editorial guidelines. For more information about Healthline's partnership with Diabetes Mine, please click here.

Type 2 Diabetes Treatment Type 2 Diabetes Diet Diabetes Destroyer Reviews Original Article

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How to Build a 6-figure Community Around Your Blog

You have been misled. We have been misled.

In a social media dominated world, we’ve been sold the idea of building millions of followers.

That’s how we become successful. However, MOST people will never accomplish that.

I recently re-read an article by Kevin Kelly entitled 1,000 true fans and it brought me back to reality.

The premise is as follows:

If you can get 1,000 true fans to spend $100/year with you, you have a 6-figure income. He also breaks it down in the following ways:

Can you get 1,000 true fans who are willing to spend one day’s wages with you? If so, you have a 6-figure income.

Can you invest in people enough to earn one true fan every day? If so, you can have a 6-figure income in only 3 years.

The beauty of this concept isn’t in the numbers 1,000 or $100. In fact, if your true fans are willing to spend $200 with you, you only need 500.

Listen to the Episode

To go along with each post on this blog, there's actually a podcast episode, where I go more in depth. Listen to that episode by pressing the play button below. Also, consider subscribing in iTunes for more value.

What is a true fan

Kelly’s definition of a true fan is so good, that I’ll just quote him:

“A true fan is defined as a fan that will buy anything you produce. These diehard fans will drive 200 miles to see you sing; they will buy the hardback and paperback and audible versions of your book; they will purchase your next figurine sight unseen; they will pay for the “best-of” DVD version of your free youtube channel; they will come to your chef’s table once a month.”

The goal of this post is to twofold:

To break down how to get 1 true fan – someone willing to spend $100 with you every year.

To break down how to grow a community of true fans – so that they will remain true fans.

To break down what it takes to earn $100 from each fan

Am I at that point myself? Not quite. I don’t have 1,000 customers. However, in growing my blog to where I’m able to sustain my family well, I’ve learned a lot.

In part, I’m posting this to remind myself of what I need to do more of. The hope is that you can learn from me as I share my thoughts. And that you can feel empowered to grow your own 6-figure community.

Create good content for a targeted niche

Create good content for a targeted niche

This is something you’ve probably heard a lot. Narrow down your niche. It’s often said from the perspective of getting exposure in what would be an overcrowded space.

If you try to attract everyone, it would be harder to gain traction because of all the competition that exists. But I’d like to reframe that for you.

It’s not just about getting traction. It’s about being able to serve unique individuals in a way that big corporation can’t. It’s about getting to touch the life of one person in a unique way. And doing that over and over for the people who identify with your message.

Niching down is a way of serving at a deeper level. And doing that will make it easier for you to build that community.

Stand up for (or against) something and make it clear

I stayed in a hotel recently and when leaving I saw something interesting. There was a minivan with a sign that said Trump for president: Make America Great Again. On the opposite side, there was another sign that said Hilary for Jail.

Stand up for something and make it clear

Without getting political, I must acknowledge that Trump succeeded in an interesting way. He got people to rally around the concept of making America great again. And strengthened his community by having them rally against a specific person.

Now, this isn’t a discussion about politics. But there are lessons to be learned here. Rally your community by standing up for something. And even more powerful – rally them around standing up against something.

For you, it may not be a person. It may be a concept or even a movement. It may be that you believe that social media is the bane of our existence. Or that people who kill animals for food are doing something terrible.

Or, you may be tired of how much sugar companies put in our kids’ meals. Whatever it is, stand up for (or against) it. By having those shared values, you give people something to rally around.

Share your genuine and authentic self

Share your genuine and authentic self

If someone comes to your blog and it’s only a bunch of technical information about your niche, you lost. That’s information that they can get anywhere on the net.

And with so many blogs out there in just about every niche, you need to create something different.

Want to know what’s different? YOU are. So share you. Tell your story. Share your authentic self. Because if they see you and identify with who you are, they will be more likely to connect with what you do.

Show up consistently in multiple forms

Show up consistently in multiple forms

The internet has become more dynamic over the last few years. Online video is the bulk of what we consume online. Social media has made it possible for us to connect in all kinds of ways. Stories help us to easily engage our community.

Get out from behind your blog and start showing up consistently on multiple platforms in multiple ways. The more they are able to connect with you in different places, the more you’ll become a part of their lives.

It’s not about trying to be everywhere. It’s about trying to connect in different ways. Choose what those ways will be for you and show up.

Have community lingo

Language is a powerful thing. I speak Dutch, and whenever I’m out in public and hear someone speak Dutch, I feel an instant connection.

Have community lingo

Shared language is a powerful connector. And it’s why so many popular books come up with named theories and concepts.

Because if they can get us to start using their lingo, there will be a stronger connection. How can you create lingo that’s unique to your community?

What processes can you describe and name? Come up with a few and be consistent with using them in your community.

Teach them how to use your newly described processes and get them bought into your lingo.

Connect with individuals

This is one of the most powerful things you can do to strengthen your connection with your community. Connect with the individuals in your community.

It’s not all about the big email lists. It’s not about the thousands of subscribers. It’s about the connection that each individual feels to you and your community.

How will they feel that connection? When YOU actually connect with them. Here are some of the things you can do:

When someone comments on your blog, reach out to them personally. You can do this even when they comment on your social media posts.

Randomly reach out to individual members of your community just to check in on them.

Call them by name in different ways. Whether that’s on your podcast, in your videos, or simply in your social media posts. There’s something special about hearing (and seeing) your name.

Here’s the magical part – this works best when you have a small community. In that way, the small is actually an advantage.



Have a place online for members to connect

It’s great when people are able to connect with you. It makes them feel connected. But you know what makes it even more powerful? When they are able to connect with each other.

Have an online place to connect

There are a number of ways you can do this. Here are a few:

Introduce people to each other one-on-one. Do you know someone who would be a great connection for someone else in your community? Introduce them via Social Media or DM.

Start a Facebook group. This is a great way to build a community in a place where people are. And with all the recent changes Facebook has been making, now is a great time to start one. They are focused on promoting groups. Ride the wave.

Invite members of your community onto a FB live and have other members in your community ask them questions. I’ve seen business partnerships start this way. Very effective.

Have live group calls where community members get to interact with each other.

Random Acts of Kindness

Have you ever been a recipient of a random act of kindness? How did it make you feel? Let me guess . . . AWESOME!

Do unexpected acts of kindness for others and be surprised at the results.

Well, have you been on the giving end of a random act of kindness? How did that make you feel? Let me guess . . . MORE AWESOME!

There’s something about doing something unexpected for someone else that brightens the world.

And when it’s unexpected, it’s remembered. And when it has that kind of impact, people feel more connected.

Start doing this unexpected acts of kindness for others and you’ll be surprised at the results.

Go offline

I know, I know – it’s awesome to be able to build a community without having to leave your home. The internet gives us amazing ways to connect with others and it’s just awesome.

But I gotta tell you, the best connections happen in person. As your community grows, start having in-person meetups. I’ve done a handful of these, and they do wonders for solidifying connections.

So come out from behind that computer screen and engage people in real life. Host your own meetups. Join other meetups. Network IRL.

And if you can facilitate other people connecting in person, you just took your community bond to the next level.

Have enough to sell

Have enough to sell

I left this one for last because its success depends on the strength of the community you built. Going back to the original equation, if you get 1000 to pay you $100, you earned $100K.

Well, in order to do that, you need to have stuff to sell, and it needs to be enough to equal $100. What are you creating that’s valuable enough that people are willing to part with cash to get?

If you haven’t gotten to this stage in your business as yet, start working towards it.

Let’s wrap this up

So there you have it. Those are some practical things you can do to build a 6-figure community around your blog.

Do you need to do all of it? Nope. In fact, you can succeed by focusing on one of these tactics and going deep.

The main thing I want you to understand is that it’s very possible to accomplish. So, get to work, build your community, and grow your business.

By the way, let me know how you plan on building your community in the comments.

Resources Mentioned

1,000 true fans by Kevin Kelly

Infographic

[Infographic] How to Build a 6-figure Community Around Your Blog

The post How to Build a 6-figure Community Around Your Blog appeared first on Become A Blogger by Leslie Samuel.

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