#but also bc of the look emma n norman exchange when he does it. they definitely know hes distanced himself from everyone else
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thinking about how easily ray was willing to make an exception to his firm ‘i can only save emma and norman’ stance once don and gilda are actually in on the escape. the fact that, during his ‘deal’ with norman in ep 5 ‘we can bring don and gilda too’ isnt a condition norman had that ray begrudgingly agreed to but rather one that ray brought up completely unprompted.
ray has spent years coming to terms with the fact that saving everyone is impossible, years putting emma and norman over everyone else because they were the most precious people in his life and because risking a bigger escape could get everyone killed. he thought it was better for the others to live ignorant, happy lives until their shipment than to get killed on the outside.
ray never had that same ignorant bliss the others had, emma and norman lost it after seeing conny, and while don and gilda aren’t given the full truth at first, they are given enough to have that illusion shattered for them as well. i just think a lot about how ray knows what it’s like to be trapped in that house without that happy illusion, and the moment don and gilda lose it, he can’t allow himself to push them away anymore.
#skye's ramblings#I DUNNO IM JUST. I HAVE A LOT OF THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS. even before the escape ray cares abt everyone so so much#his whole thing is he wants to minimize their grief. if he cant save them he wants to make sure they dont suffer at all#he pushes them away not just for his own emotions but bc he thinks theyll handle his eventual death better if theyre not close to him#hes just a scared kid who wants to help everyone!!! so so bad!!!! fuuuuuuuuuuck!!!!!!!!!!!#also why the whole situation w phil makes me insane like. ray had no input in that decision. im not sure he wouldve let him stay behind#yeees it was phils choice to stay but rays the only ond who knows what that choice actually fucking means!!!!! fuck!!!#and as ive made abundantly clear. i reaally love ray's apology to don in ep 6 not only for thedevelopment between them#but also bc of the look emma n norman exchange when he does it. they definitely know hes distanced himself from everyone else#even if they dont have every detail at this point. he has made his stance on making sure they escape at any cost abundantly clear#ray means the world to them but they dont want to be his only source of comfort yknow. seeing that brief vulnerability was everything <3#ohhhhh im so. rays relationship w both don and gilda is everything to me. lying onthe foor
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