#but ahrimans prophecy is such a good game i miss it

[spicebowl]

thinking about doing an aveyond playthru of all the games from arhimans prophecy to aveyond 4 again, the annual january playthru

[queenrhenpendragon]

Amaranth Games

I know generally you wait until the creator is long gone to analyze stuff like this but I have so many feelings and I need to say them.

A while back I discovered the first game Amanda ever made: Gaea Fallen. The graphics were predictably HORRIBLE, it's a 2002 indie game, first one she ever made, whatcha gonna do, right? But the story guys. The story! It was beautiful, the plot was so poetic, like in Ahriman's Prophecy and Rhen's Quest and to some extent, all of the Aveyond games.

Quick summary (and spoilers ahead obviously) it starts with this seamstress named Eve who is basically a strange adorable mix of Talia and Mel, and who lives in a small village called Clearwater. As per usual she is informed she is the chosen one, and reluctantly agrees to save the world. (Can't tell if it's on purpose or just bad graphics, but the way she walks is hilarious because she LOOKS angry and bitter, like "fine, I'll save the world! But I'll HATE IT!!!") Along the way we meet the town librarian, Simon, who Eve obviously has a huge crush on. He wants to see the world and always tells her stories about far away places and drops ridiculously obvious hints about wishing she would go with him when he leaves (which she completely misses cuz she's a FOOL). Eve likes these stories but always insists that she's just a seamstress and wants nothing more than to live peacefully, and it becomes increasingly obvious as the game progresses that she essentially doesn't believe she could be important or valuable or useful in any other capacity, and that's why she sticks so stubbornly to this one. She’s scared to give herself a chance at anything else.

And finally in the end, she saves the world and the goddesses tell her they'll grant her a life full of great adventures and happiness, and she predictably asks for a skip on the adventures part, and they say-- what follows is a huge spoiler but the quote is hugely important not only to analyzing this game but I think every game made after-- they say, "Follow your heart, Eve. Then you shall know how to answer us.”

So Eve is given until that evening to answer, basically. She goes back into town, and discovered that Simon is packing a cart and preparing to leave. And then we get the choice. Eve can stay in Clearwater, hidden away in her cottage, and live her familiar life and pretend she’s never spoken to guardians and gods or had her mettle tested in the face of death himself.

Or she can go. She can take all her boldness and rage and hope and see what she can make of herself. She can accept the love she wanted but was too afraid to believe in until that moment. She can stop being what she’s limited herself to and step into the life she didn’t dare to dream about.

Sound familiar? These are exactly the choices Talia and Rhen face. Talia makes the choice offscreen, because it happens between-games, but we see the build-up for her. We watch the whole story for Rhen.

And as a woman, I’ve found the same tale unfolding in my life. At least in my own observations, it’s a story all women can relate to. We put limits on ourselves, or accept the limits others place on us. We’re not supposed to be ambitious, or loud, or revolutionary, or great. And if we are any of those things, or want to be any of them, we can’t be kind, or emotional, or happy, or in love. It’s either/or, and often, for so many, neither. 

It’s easy to see Amanda struggling with these same kinds of things when she started making games. She’s mentioned in interviews she never imagined the games would be as popular as they were-- and the first two she made were free! But she took the plunge, and she absolutely KILLED IT. She practically invented a new genre-- yeah, we’ve seen coming-of-age stories before, but hers are distinctly feminine. Made by a woman, target audience is women, woman is the protagonist (instead of a protagonist, and there’s a huge difference), and significantly, instead of just showing how “girls can be masculine too,” the values and themes are feminine and celebrate womanhood. And of course Eve and Rhen and all of them can be masculine and even are in ways, but we already knew that from every other story that ever tried to have a female protagonist. It’s rare and wonderful to find stories that also acknowledge and honor being a woman. I know it’s important to me and I imagine it’s important for other women and actually all other people, because we all have these traits to some extent and it’s about time someone told us they’re good and worthwhile and interesting. It’s about time someone told a story of female greatness and how we can accomplish and be more than we ever imagined.

Amanda could do it, she wrote characters who do it, she made me believe I can do it. I don’t know if I would have finished college without her. I never would have gotten into drawing again-- something I love, something that gives me so much fulfillment. I never would have started writing seriously. Wouldn’t have taken on that high school geometry class, that two experienced teachers quit on. Every time I am faced with a choice between stagnation and an adventure that feels too big for me, I remember Rhen. I remember Talia and Eve. I think of Amanda. And I give it a shot.