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#but I only have 2 more alphabets
coquelicoq · 6 months
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This broadcast dude came across my feed! I guess they could put pronunciation in the player notes
https://youtube.com/shorts/z2wZv1eUFJw?si=fc4ssdziE71b3oNg
thank you so much for passing this on!!! [video of a broadcaster explaining how he keeps track of player names]
of course they COULD put pronunciation in the player notes, but DO THEY?? and if so, using what notation system? that is the question. it looks like this particular nba broadcaster does not. the mystery remains but we inch ever closer to enlightenment.
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heritageposts · 9 months
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large zionist blocklist below
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i've compiled a list of all the blogs positively interacting with the @/israel-palestine-bingo blog
there's more info about how the names were complied under the read more, but just to get an idea of how vile the blog is, i just want to quickly mention that the first prize offered in their pinned post, "eight hours of memi mamtera," is the song used in the viral israeli tiktok trend of kidnapping, humiliating, and torturing palestinians in the west bank.
and the "grand prize," which needs no explanation, is "all of palestine! for free!"
some quick info: all the names here have either approvingly replied to, reblogged from, or liked one or more of @/israel-palestine-bingo's posts. for likes, i've only gathered names that appear under their original posts; mostly ones that have not been reblogged, and some with 2-3 reblogs that have not left the immediate sphere of zionists. i've also made sure that these are blogs who have either liked more than one posts from them, or who frequently reblogs from other zionists.
you can also quickly look through the blog yourself (it doesn't have that many posts), or check out any of the names on the list with a quick 'israel' or 'palestine' in the search bar or their blogs.
there are more screenshots at the end of the posts, including ones showing who made the blog (ani-lo-daredevil / katenotbishop), and the bingo board itself (ashenpumpkin).
blocking tip: fastest way to mass block users (on desktop) is to go to settings -> the blog your blocking them from -> scroll all the way down to 'blocked tumblrs,' and then copy-paste the name your blocking
names listed below in alphabetical order reminder again, block don't engage
2peachy acleverforgery ani-lo-daredevil apollo-enthusiast ashenpumpkin <- credited for making the bingo board, reblogged/liked almost all of their posts. aureatecorvid avi-on-jumblr (main @/clear-what-i-was-seeing) awstheticshit bambahalva bleepiesheepie bluenorther blueredfetch bones-and-crows britneysmeanshirt cannibalism-is-my-love-language captain-navii casavanse celepito chubbybubba ciitrus--fruitz coffeelovinggayidiot da-socks davos-is-the-one-true-king dchan87 disregardenedgnostic elder-millennial-of-zion faggotry-enjoyer fdelopera flowercrownsandfairylights fluffel677 fluffy-art-moss george-lucas-is-god got-chavi icereader12 illegitimatetenenbaum inklingm8 its-hila jewishlivesmatter just-illegal karinhasdacookie
katenotbishop <- the main account of the person running the blog. her sideblog is @/ani-lo-daredevil
kelluinox kingofslush letaot-ze-magniv lingonberryjamistakenwhat lovelyhairedpianist magic-coffee marrymepadfoot marvel-ous-posts masters-puddle <- pornblog mixmangosmangoverse morganas-simp mossadspydolphin multifandermissesanakin nameless370 namiko026 nevleg32 notcrazyiswear oakstar519 perfectlynormalperson psychologeek queerius randomname3 redvodyanoi rhysaka sally006 sbinklebooper scp-1296 shinekocreator <- commented, 'but is this the 8 hour version?' on a post where someone ''won'' the song used in the tiktok torture videos. snakelung sort-of-a-demon soxiyy stuffandatherstuff tearsandice tedious-waffle thebejeweledwatercat the-library-alcove thirdmagic thisgingerhasnosoul timegirl tolaat-bli-toelet <- the person running the bingo blog. mainblog is @/katenotbishop transmascpetewentz tribulation-of-somnolence unexistencerpg viktorrotkiv wanderingmadscientist whiterose-blackrose whitesunlars why5x5
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note: @/tolaat-bli-toelet changed her username to @/ani-lo-daredevil (her main is still @/katenotbishop)
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and from the same post,
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the last post was also reblogged by the creator of the israel-palestine-bingo blog
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11K notes · View notes
goldsainz · 3 months
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❝ NSFW ALPHABET ❞
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MASTERLIST!
pairing . . . jacaerys velaryon x reader
◦∘。゚. warnings . . . MINORS DNI! lewd language, smut (breeding kink, creampie (?), lactation kink, overstimulation, oral (fem receiving), worshipping).
◦∘。゚. summary . . . jacaerys' behaviour in the bedroom.
◦∘。゚. note . . . i am so so so happy to be writing for hotd again, i’m enjoying season 2 so much and i can’t wait for it to be sunday tbh. i haven’t written smut in YEARS (literally) so if this is bad it’s because i am quite rusty😔 requests are open (for aemond & jacaerys)!
[ word count: 2,2k ]
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A — AFTERCARE . . . what they're like after sex!
Jacaerys was raised to be a proper prince, and with that, he learned how to respect women. He’s so gentle, drawing a bath himself and making sure you feel at comfort. Anything you need he will make sure you have. When you’re both back in bed, he cuddles you and falls asleep whispering sweet nothings.
B — BODY PART . . . their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner's!
THEIRS . . . He loves his hands, mostly because you love them. Loves to use them to hold you incredibly close, to cup your cheeks when he leans in for a kiss, or just loves them when you take his hand and proudly walk alongside him, hand in hand.
YOURS . . . He loves your tummy. Loves peppering kisses on it, resting his head and falling asleep soundly while you run your hands through his hair. If you ever get pregnant it will be a hassle to get him off you and your tummy.
C — CUM . . . anything to do with cum, basically!
Even if he didn’t have a duty to get you pregnant, he would still be cumming inside you. It’s quite the primal urge he has to make sure everyone knows you’re his. It doesn't matter what you're doing, he will not cum anywhere else but inside you. If he sees his cum dripping out of you, he will push it back into you either with his fingers or simply with his cock.
D — DIRTY SECRET . . . pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs!
Jacaerys is quite comfortable in being the giver of the relationship, but sometimes he fantasies about you taking over in the bedroom. To be the one crying from overstimulation, to have you take care of him. 
E — EXPERIENCE . . . how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?
He was one of the few men to save themselves for marriage, though not because of purity but more so because he never felt the urge to go to a brothel and have his first sexual experience be with a whore. Despite this, he does know what he’s doing. He had a talk with Daemon one time many moons ago, and because of it he’s gained some knowledge. But he only learns the true meaning of pleasure with you. 
F — FAVOURITE POSITION . . . this goes without saying!
Cowgirl. As previously stated, he loves the idea of you dominating him and while that isn't quite it, you on top makes him lose his mind. He also knows how much you enjoy the position, with him hitting you just right, as you once put it. With you controlling the pace and how much you take in, Jacaerys can perfectly take in the beautiful sight of your blissed-out face. 
G — GOOFY . . . are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.
When he’s in the bedroom he’s quite focused on making sure you’re okay and feel good, so there is no time to be humorous. Still, things happen and a giggle or two slip out when he’s going at it too hard and bumps your head against the bed frame, or when you're both desperate and trip over your clothes. Jacaerys doesn't necessarily try to make your intimate moments funny, but he doesn't stop it if it happens. 
H — HAIR . . . how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.
Before you he didn’t really care about grooming, but the days prior to your wedding night he decided to look his best. You have never asked him to groom himself, but he feels as though he has to. He knows how much you take care of yourself, why wouldn’t he do the same? As for the carpet matching the drapes they do. It’s a deep brown and slightly curly, just like the hair on his head.
I — INTIMACY . . . how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect.
Jacaerys is very romantic. He’s tender and sweet from beginning to the end, mostly because he’s madly in love with you, but also because he wants to take his time with you. He’s a big fan of eye contact, handholding, and kissing. Any opportunity he has where he can feel more connected to you, he will take it. Confessions of love and adoration are not rare, an “I love you” slipping from his lips when he’s thrusting inside you, or the looks he gives you that make you feel what he’s feeling. You don’t have just sex, you make love.
J — JACK OFF . . . masturbation headcanon!
He doesn’t often masturbate, only in situations when he’s away from you and misses you dearly. Truly, he gets needy. Usually, he waits until he’s back home with you and releases all that pent up tension onto you. But sometimes, when he longs for you and can’t have you, he resorts to his hand. It doesn't measure up to what your touch feels like, at all, but it does the job to at least quell some of the fire burning up inside him.
K — KINK . . .one or more of their kinks!
As previously mentioned this man wants you pregnant so bad. His breeding kink is very obvious to you, from the way he whispers in your ear how much he wants to see you pregnant, to see his seed take and make you swell with his baby, you want it as much as him, and that just makes him more feral. The Velaryon Prince loves feeling needed, which is why edging is one of his favourite ways to make you crave him as much as he craves you. Your desperate pleas to come fall to deaf ears, as he enjoys your whining and writhing just as much as the sight of you orgasming.
L — LOCATION . . . favourite places to do the deed!
Always somewhere private. Jacaerys is not much of an exhibitionist, although he likes people knowing you’re his, he also doesn’t want anyone else to be able to see you in a compromising position. That sight is sacred, reserved only to him only. As for a specific place, he thoroughly enjoys having sex in your bed. Maybe it's because of how intimate it is or that he knows there’s no way you'll be uncomfortable, but that is his preferred place.
M — MOTIVATION . . . what turns them on, gets them going!
Anything that you do is enough. Sometimes he fears how much power you have over him, how he’s so enamoured and almost obsessed with you. He gets turned on pretty easily when he’s around you, it doesn't take more than you speaking at him in your sweet, honeyed voice for him to be hard. 
N — NO . . . something they wouldn't do, turn offs!
Any type of experience where he has to share you with someone. No to threesome, no to exhibitionsim, and no to cuckolding. He also does not like seeing you get hurt, if he even suspects you’re not liking something he’ll stop until you’re comfortable. 
O — ORAL . . . preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.
Jacaerys doesn’t dislike the feeling of your mouth on his cock, but he much prefers the feeling of his mouth on your pussy. He eats you out like it’s his last meal, holding your hips down and feasting on the taste of you. He loves overstimulating you until you’re trying to push his head away, the pleasure too much. Loves how you push him back towards your pussy, grabbing a handful of his hair to make him continue his ministrations when he separates himself from you to breathe some air. Sometimes you fear he will suffocate between your thighs, when he doesn't come back up for air in a while, and what a sweet death that’d be to him. 
P — PACE . . . are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.
His pace is usually slow and sensual. He worships you, taking his time to appreciate all your sounds and the faces you make, forever burned in his memory. He loves showing you just how much he loves you, making you feel his adoration for you. Still, Jacaerys has moments where he can be rough, lost in the pleasure he frantically fucks into you. He rarely loses control, but when he does you’re both left a beautiful, sweaty mess.
Q — QUICKIE . . . their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.
Not the biggest fan of them. He likes to take his time, savouring those intimate moments so quickies are not something he would choose to partake in. If he’s really needy, he will consider the idea, but usually what starts as a quickie, ends in a long sexual endeavour. 
R — RISK . . . are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.
He’s pretty open to any ideas you might have, as long as they don’t involve sharing or hurting you in any way. He doesn't mind taking risks, but he’s pretty comfortable with the things you already do and will not be the one to propose different ways to spice things up, he leaves that to you. 
S — STAMINA . . . how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?
He can last a few, it all depends on what you're doing. Three rounds is the sweet spot for him. He eats you out, he fucks you and then fucks you once more to make sure his cum really takes. If you just want to make love, have one simple round where you’re both connected, then he’ll give it to you. But this man is insatiable, so it rarely ends in one round for him. 
T — TOYS . . . do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?
Neither of you really need them, you both consider the other enough. If you ever wanted to introduce toys in the bedroom, then Jacaerys is open to the idea. Maybe one day you’ll experiment, but for now the Prince has plenty of skill that will make you forget about any toys.
U — UNFAIR . . . how much they like to tease!
He loves teasing you. He makes you yearn for his touch, adoring the pout you give him and how glassy your eyes get when teasing you. Jacaerys slicks himself along your entrance, bumping against your clit which in turn makes you squirm and whine, and he takes his time until you’re almost sobbing for him to insert himself in you. He’s the worst in public, grabbing you by your waist and telling you how badly he wishes to be in bed with you, only to leave you to go speak to some lord. He watches your agape mouth as you look at him, and all he does is smirk because he knows how wet you’ll be when he finally has you alone.
V — VOLUME . . . how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.
Jacaerys is incredibly vocal. He groans when he finally sheathes himself inside you, moaning when you’re on top of him bouncing up and down without mercy. He’s not shy in telling you how good you're making him feel. He wishes he could speak more to you, but he becomes an incoherent mess pretty quickly and all you can understand are the few mumbles of “Need you” or “So good”, lewdly whining when you clench around him. A drawn out “Fuck” leaves his lips when he comes, squeezing your hips and almost shaking in relief when he feels his spend painting your gummy walls. 
W — WILD CARD . . . a random headcanon for the character!
Wants to fuck you while pregnant and see the milk from your tits dripping, to taste the sweet nectar your body produces. He dreams of how round your belly will be, and how ethereal you’ll look with the glow of motherhood. 
X — X-RAY . . . let's see what's going on under those clothes!
He’s around 15 cm or 6 inches. He’s quite girthy, with a heavy ball sack. He has some prominent veins which you can feel when he’s thrusting in you, the ridges making you sigh in pleasure. 
Y — YEARNING . . . how high is their sex drive?
Jacaerys has a high sex drive, better make the most of it while he’s young. He can control himself, he has great restraint because he knows the wait will just make it all the more sweeter. You can tell quite well when he’s yearning for you, sometimes all it takes is a good look at him and other times he’ll simply groan into your ear how badly he needs you. You guys have sex pretty much every day, with a few exceptions when you're sore or simply not in the mood. 
Z — ZZZ . . . how quickly they fall asleep after sex!
When you fall asleep, he falls asleep. He has great stamina but sometimes when he tires the both of you out, he can’t help but fall asleep almost instantly after he spends his load inside you. Adores cuddling you, makes sleeping for him easier and rids him of any bad dreams. He holds you close, drifting off to the sound of your slow breathing and the heat of your body against his. 
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luxuourr · 4 months
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Why manifesting is your best friend + society is a bitch.
manifesting ?? my best friend ? hell no. i need to work so hard...
pookie it's not your work hard thing , your society you live in, we collectively live in , has told us fucked up shit we don't need to believe in, nothing of it is true. The only thing true is what's from the heart and it's the feeling , you didn't and god didn't and universe didn't send time upon us , we used our brains to create it ,
laws don't fail. laws are made laws because they're undeniable.
understand time is not linear , scientists found alphabets otherwise let's be honest , who would have known what's English is?? If Greeks and Egyptians didn't work on time. would we know today?
nuh uh! so I suggest you to remember, don't look at how much time or date you're at, don't look at how many hours until he (sp ) surprises ur enemy with date , how you fail
no time to think of this, think the best of every possible circumstance, I know and you should too, you're doing a great job
even if the last conversation with him ended in a divorce, breakup or failed situation ship, you can get it all back, even if life has not been kind to you and you could not keep up with the most important exam of your life AND you're a victim of domestic abuse or parental abuse. it's not too late, you're not doing anything right or wrong , just because you could not do more than you could because of circumstances, it'll not change your results , it'll not change you getting 100%, if you did everything positively and tried to slap your negative thoughts there's always hope. i say this as I have not prepared anything for the most important math exam of my life and it's 5 pm rn , I have 14 chapters and have the most biggest exam of my life tommorow at 1 pm, have severe depression and the most toxic and hurtful family you could ever imagine to have.
believe me, no one will care about you, until you make it happen.
do you know what your job is ?
- know what you want + assume you're that version, that super model , famous celeb, have that desired body s/o or whatever , fullfill yourself after that and BOOM you wake up in it, won't even take less than a 2-3 days if your belief is good enough, you're doing shit in a fun way to manifest everything you want
- failure doesn't exist , no you're not delusional for attempting nothing in exam and wanting 96% ,you're god remember. the others who have the exam aren't , if you assume you'll know everything without studying that's going to happen, it only depends on what you feed yourself with.
- gone is gone , it's like it'll never come back, if there is something attached , like up coming results from what happened, i suggest assume + accept and move on
- if you script, mediate, robotically affirm, visualize or do whatever, it is meant to happen
- do not worry, you're doing a good job, just try your best for certain things or assume , everything works in the best possible outcomes
- mountains and clouds , centuries and the equator will move for you to get your desires.
- no you're not cursed and shit, life's a rainbow sparkle colors it's all a roses of bed and not what society taught us, just assume and you'll wake up with it
- for example if you have important exams of your life , there's this girl in front of you doing so well in exams , u don't wanna cheat and there's no chances anyway but you realize, the best you're doing right now is trying your level best in the exam and if you have time or not , time doesn't matter it's just created by us, remember she's not better she has no idea about LOA It's , you it's me it's us. Why would she be better, she had to study 24/7 and then still assume about average grades and stress over what's wrong and right , instead you , who could visualize given it well, be the person who got 96% in these exams isn't it much more fun, less tiring and entertaining??
- you got to know manifesting for a reason, trust people who posted their success stories, trust yourself , be kind to yourself and don't let the old story walk over you, it was never there , failure never existed , you've always been the new story you created for yourself, understood.?
- beating yourself up is not going to reverse time again honey, it's gone , it's not coming back , like never so focus on yourself, your feelings , your intentions , your life. Try to know that manifesting is not about trying to get and doing methods to recieve , it's about KNOWING and feeling.
e. g Aliyah is a girl who's a manifestor she wants good grades, she has issues she cannot study because of and cause her to be burn out at home , so she decides , the night before finals.
she thinks " i will try my best and even if it's the point where it wasn't good enough, universe and manifesting has my back, the time that'll be taken by the institute to check my exams , I'll revise everything including all my wrong parts of exam and unfilled parts to fully filled correct answers because crying and whining won't do shit, but this feeling will change everything" , even her bsf in this case supported her and told her that she's manifesting for her and everything plays out in the best possible circumstances. You only assumed like that and made it happen
e. g there's another manifestor called Sara she is also giving the same exam as aliyah , but instead of working on her self concept , believing in herself
, she'd cry for hours everyday for three months so instead of reality giving her the 100% she's been hoping for , she fails she thinks 3D is everything( it's not ) , she doesn't believe in bloggers she's impulsive, thinks crying is the solution to everything , she spends 3 months crying and shitting about herself to achieve nothing in life
prior to this aliyah the master manifestor slays in everything she does, she accepts and moves on , every time bad thoughts get to her , she slaps them with " NO THIS IS MY WORLD IM AN ACCURATE PERFECT MANIFESTOR"
so who of them saved themselves despite abusive household and everything??? Sarah just spent all the time crying and whining.
you can either be her. ( Sarah) or HER (aliyah)
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Note
God ever since reading A Gilded Cage I cant get the thought out of my head of a part 2 where Reader doesn't see Jason for a few days after the revelation. Like maybe he thinks he's being kind and giving us some time to process, maybe he's on his angst again, or maybe some outside factor has taken his attention so the only time he's able to visit is while we're asleep.
And the whole night of the reveal feels like a fever dream when we wake up but there's a blanket draped over us and a fuzzy little kitten purring up a storm on our chest (in my heart his name is Bean (short for Toebean)), so we're at least kind of sure it happened. But as the time passes with no sign of Jason our certainty begins to wane and until we finally get fed up and write on the notepad the first thing we've asked for since that night: "You."
Or something like that idek okay I've been over here clawing at my walls frothing at the mouth I never really even liked ak!Jason before reading your stuff and now I'm feral for him and its all your fault and I'm not even mad about it
A Glimmering Collar
AKA Part Two of this series. Ahh, nonnie, you literally cooked with this. I love when my fics inspire people enough to keep thinking on them! Seriously, ty for dropping these ideas in my inbox cause I had nothing going on in my brain for a part two initially. Hope you enjoy!
~2.6k words
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You wake up to something tickling your nose. Your body feels heavy, your mind even more so. Nothing in you is ready to open your eyes, to face the fact that last night could all have been a dream. That he isn't– that was just a dream.
Something soft flicks your nose again, and you force your eyes open. You blink hard once. Then twice. It's a kitten. It's tiny, and it's sitting by your face. Every few seconds, its tail sways and brushes your nose.
Oh. You sit up slowly, trying not to frighten the small thing. It looks at you contently over its shoulder and meows. The kitten stretches as you stare at it, then plops itself directly on the blanket resting over your lap.
Huh. There's a blanket you definitely don't remember grabbing sprawled over your legs. You carefully reach down to pet the kitten's head. Your heart melts a little when it nuzzles your fingers and purrs.
You look around the room slowly. Nothing else looks different. The notepad is still in place, but the kitten and blanket all point to one thing. Last night was real. Jason is alive. Jason is the Arkham Knight.
You're trying to wrap your brain around that when the door flies open, nearly making you jump out of your skin.
"Good morning!!" A flurry of voice call from the doorway. Your eyes widen as three brightly dressed people strut their way into your apartment, "Are you ready for your shopping trip, hun?"
"My– excuse me?" You stumble out, tucking the kitten to your chest as you stand.
They giggle, and one of them steps forward, "Your shopping trip, sweetie! And spa day, of course. Oh, ha, we haven't even been introduced, have we? I'm Krystal with a K, she's Destini with an i and he's Robbi also with an i."
Robbi huffs and walks up to you to pet your kitten, "Why can't you ever introduce Destini second? She can be Destini also with an i, ya know."
The other girl walks up to you as well and picks affectionately at your clothes, "Because it's alphabetical that way, Robbi. Now you better go get dressed, we have brunch reservations and mimosa plans!"
"I– sorry? What?" You ask, eyes darting between the three of them. Whatever this is, you can't keep up. You've barely processed Jason kidnapped you, and now you're supposed to go get a massage and drinks?
"The boss wants you to go out," a flat voice cuts in. You're the only one that stiffens at the sight of two large men stepping through the door.
Krystal speaks up, "We're here to make sure you have a good time! And Mack and John are here to keep us safe!"
"Mack and John," You echo weakly.
"Your body guards, silly," Destini chirps, ushering you to your room. She plucks the kitten from your hands, "Now get dressed! Wear something nice!"
You stare at the door as she shuts it. What just happened? You hear them chattering happily in the kitchen, idly talking about pregaming your shopping trip.
Your whole mind is a mess, and you sluggishly get ready, thoughts whirling. You've barely talked to soul since you were kidnapped, and now you have five new names to remember, a kitten, and a day out.
You're not exactly sure if you should be unsettled or grateful at how quickly Jason worked to get you what you asked for. By the time you've opened your bedroom door, Krystal, Destini and Robbi are passing around a flask, and playfully trying to get your 'bodyguards' to drink it.
You wonder what they must think of all this. Who they think you are. You're struck with the realization that Jason must be paying them to entertain you today.
You don't get to linger on the thought before Robbi hooked his arm with yours, dragging you towards the door, "Let's gooo, the brunch place we're going to does the best pineapple mimosas. Or cherry, if that's your thing."
"Wait," Mack– or John, you're not exactly sure which one is which– stops you, "Boss wants you to wear this."
The girls and Robbi coo in awe when Mack opens a box, revealing a glittery, jaw-dropping choker. You waver at the sight of it. It's not that it doesn't match what you're wearing. You'd dressed up like Destini suggested, but it feels like some kind of trap.
You reluctantly pick up the necklace, eyeing how it catches the light, "Is it– are sure it's safe to wear this out?" Safety isn't really what you're concerned about at the moment.
You're more worried about the crushing weight that this means more than you understand.
John nods once, "There won't be any problems."
Krystal happily plucks the necklace from your fingers, and before you have time to argue, she drapes the necklace around your throat. "It's beautiful, hun. Just like you. Let's go get you something to eat," her voice is soft, measured, and full of so much understanding it makes you want to cry.
You don't know much they know, but when she hooks her arm with yours to guide you out the door, you have a feeling there's more awareness than their bubbly attitudes let on.
The day ends up being wonderful. Being around people, out under the sun (the sun Gotham does get), was rejuvenating. You had fun, joked, smiled, and for a day, it was almost like you didn't have a prison cell to go back to.
The food was delicious, the spa relaxing, and you didn't have to carry back a single bag. Krystal had flashed a black card at every payment, every place ever could want to shop at, reassuring you it's all been taken care of.
But the time you've collapsed on the couch, exhausted but content, the uneasy feelings from this morning are gone.
You settle on the cushions to wait for Jason. To thank him for listening or to yell at him for still keeping you here, you're not exactly sure yet.
But he doesn't come, you fall asleep in your expensive necklace and pretty clothes with one hand petting your kitten. He doesn't come the next day either, at least not while you're awake, but Krystal, Destini, and Robbi do.
Your friends, the people being paid to entertain you are nice, perfect even. They're exactly what you would have asked for.
Your kitten is perfect too, it cuddles with you at night and nuzzles under your chin after you're left alone, when the unease finds its way back to you.
It's been days since you've seen him. It's starting to feel like a lifetime. You know he comes back after you fall asleep, he moves things. You think it's his way of showing that he listened, that he came back because you asked.
The notepad, the one you haven't written on since that night, shifts closer to you on the glass table if you sleep on the couch.
The glimmering choker gets pulled out of the drawer every time you try to put it away. Your kitten has a growing collection of toys and things to climb on.
It's obvious he's visiting, so why won't he let you see him? Day five of dancing around each other breaks you. You want to see him, want to talk to him, and understand. You want Jason.
Your hand shakes a little, when you go to write on the notepad, and when you wake up the next morning, the paper is blank again.
You wait. You wait some more. All day you wait for him. No one else comes. It's strangely quiet, with just you and your kitten. You've just about given up, collapsed in your bed, when the glowing whites of his helmet catch your attention.
You sit up quickly and throw your legs off the bed as you stare into the doorway, "You came."
"Did you mean it," he asks, any emotion he's feeling hidden by the aggravating modulator.
"Mean what," You question, standing off the bed to walk closer to him, "Will you take the mask off?"
He doesn't move for a moment, just takes in the sight of you. The silence that drags almost makes you regret the question, but he carefully pulls off his helmet, "What you wrote. That you wanted me."
"I– yeah, Jason. I haven't– it's been days since I saw you," You only notice mid sentence that his hand is reaching for your face, it makes your voice waver. "You never answered any of my questions," You finish weakly.
His hand stills and he drops it, "Questions. That's what you wanted?"
You nod a little, searching his face for any hint of what he's feeling, but he gives nothing away.
He sighs softly, and looks away, adjusting his helmet under his arm. You think he might look disappointed, "I can't give you the answers you're looking for."
"Why not," You question softly, worried to push him away.
Jason turns his focus back to you, "I just need you to stay here. Please," he sighs out your name, and his hand twitches as if to touch you, "Don't fight me on this."
"That's not fair," You mumble, "Why am I here, Jason? You know I would have listened if you came to talk to me instead of– this."
Silence falls again, and he steps past you into your room. He sets his helmet on your dresser and picks up the choker resting on the wooden surface, "I wish you would wear this. I picked it out for you."
"Jason," You start, tracking his movements.
"I know," he cuts you off, "but I told you, you don't need to understand anything." You stiffen when he steps back towards you and guides you to turn around.
The air leaves your lungs as his gloves brush over your skin. He sets the necklace around your throat, and even after it rests heavy against your skin, his touch lingers.
"You just need to stay here. It's safe. I've given you everything you've asked for, and everything you haven't," Jason says softly, stepping out from behind you. His gaze lingers on your neck for a moment, and the stifling, unexplainable feeling sets back into your gut.
Your words stick in your throat. There's a sense of danger, one that doesn't make sense. Jason wouldn't hurt you. Not the Jason you know. But is this the Jason you know? The thought makes you want to tear the choker from your skin and throw it at him.
"It feels like a collar," You say quietly, and your breath hitches when his gaze snaps go yours, "I mean, it's pretty. Really. But, it feels– like it's more," You stumble out.
He nods slowly, and he doesn't stop himself from touching you this time. His fingers trace the choker, linger over your collarbones, brush along your pulse, "Maybe it is."
You blink at him, every thought flying from your brain, "What?"
He hums softly, hooking a finger under the shiny jewels to draw you closer, "Does that scare you? Knowing that you can't leave? Knowing that no matter how pretty these are, it's just another way to keep you?"
"You wouldn't hurt me," you say instead, it sounds like you believe it, but you're not sure if you're trying to convince yourself or him.
"I don't want to," He admits, fingers leaving your throat to trail up your jaw, "but I probably could."
"I don't believe that. I remember–" He tuts, tapping your cheek. Your heart drops when you realize he's mirroring where his own brand is.
"I'm not what you remember," he says firmly, before whispering your name, "I'm not that Jason. Not really."
"Then who are you," You ask, even though you don't want to know the answer. You want to pretend he's still something you know.
His eyes dart over your face, then back down to the necklace, "I'm still Jason. But I'm also the Arkham Knight."
"What does that mean," You push, reach up to grab his wrist, demanding his attention, demanding real answers.
"It means that you stay. It means that I give you what you want. Everything and anything except leaving," he says, voice lowering to something kinder, gentler, "it'll make sense eventually. You'll be happy here. Safe."
"Will that make you happy?" You ask, fingers tightening on his wrist. Half of you wants to pull him away, stop him from tracing patterns over your cheek, but the other part of you wants to press his hand closer.
Something flicks in his eyes at your words, "Yes."
"Will it keep you safe?" You murmur, eyes locked on his.
He doesn't answer, clenching and unclenching his jaw for a moment, "Safety is an option I don't have."
"It could be, if you wanted it," You say, dropping his wrist. It must be true. Even with all the secrets he's keeping, his evasive disappearing act, he could take off the armor. Leave behind the new symbol engraved over his chest.
He laughs a little and swipes his thumb under your eye, "I'm glad that you don't understand. It's good, that they didn't twist you into something unrecognizable."
"Understand?" You prompt, unsettled by his laughter.
"That they need to pay. All of them do," he smiles a little, it's a mockery of the one you remember. Jason traces the choker one last time before stepping back.
"You're leaving," You say, not a question, a statement of fact. He's leaving, without explaining anything again.
"I am," he affirms, moving to grab his helmet.
"I want you to stay," You breathe out and he freezes in place.
He exhales softly and faces you again, "You don't know what you're asking."
"I do. I want you to stay," You repeat, reaching out to push his helmet back towards the dresser.
"And then what?" He asks lowly, a warning, "What do you expect to happen?"
It makes you waver, "I– I don't know. But it's what I want."
It's another long moment of nothing before he answers, gesturing towards the bed, "Go to sleep."
"You'll stay?"
He nods at your question, unceremoniously dragging the chair from your desk to your bedside.
"Is that going to be comfortable–" You begin, settling yourself in the bed.
"You're overthinking it," he mumbles, waving at you to lay down. You do, watching as your kitten jumps into his lap, curling up like this is something that happens all the time. (You have the feeling it is) "Have you named him," he asks quietly.
"The kitten? Mm, no. Wanted you to," You say softly, carefully not to unsettle either of them.
"I wouldn't be good at it," Jason protests, eyes flicking between you and the kitten.
"I don't mind," You murmur, "anything's better than 'kitten'."
He pauses, so quiet and still you think he won't answer, "Bean," he mumbles, reluctant as the newly appointed Bean cuddles into his armor.
You smile, "Bean's a good name."
He doesn't answer, seemingly engrossed with watching the kitten.
You take him in for another moment, memorizing his face before closing your eyes. It's not an accident that you leave your palm open and face up by the side of the bed.
There's no more pleasantries exchanged, no sweet goodnights or the gentle touches against your face you've grown used to. But just as you finally start to drift off, as darkness finally draws you to rest, a warm, rough hand weaves itself into yours and squeezes.
Part Three
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mtchacrvle · 27 days
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- 🌹Yandere! Clingy prince Alphabet.
🪻note🪻yandere behaviour. And a little bit of NSFW if you squint hard enough. ( not proofread )
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Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?
-🌹 yandere prince or his real name Raizel, love to show his affection with physical touch. Such as, kissing, hugging, cuddling, etc. Any sort of physical touch as long as it's from you, he'll love it.
It could get pretty intense honestly, well, his name ain't clingy prince for nothing lol. Anyways, if he wakes up from his sleep/nap, and you're not there besides him, he'll turn the whole castle upside down. And when he finally finds you, baby girl, there's no way you're getting out of his grasp. You have other plans ? Cancel it. Cause
His clingy percentage is at 99%. Going to the bathroom? He'll be there. Going out to have a tea party with the other noblewoman? He'll be joining you in disguise, wearing a soft pink dress with a big ass hat to protect his face and you know damn well he'll demand the maids to put make up on his face and make him look like a woman. This mf would even learn to walk in heels just for you. And trust me when I tell you he has done this before, I mean it. Going on a walk at the garden? He'll excuse all the maid and he'll gladly hold the umbrella for you, with his right hand holding the umbrella and his left hand on your waist.
Overall, his very freaking clingy man. Since the minute he realises his feelings for you. that's your queue to say bye-bye to your freedom and your personal space. But mostly your personal space lol.
———
Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?
-🌹 Very messy. If someone hurts your feelings, even for a little bit. Their head will be off. He can't wait to be the emperor so that he can publicly show who you belong to and how much you guys are in love with each other.
He can have blood head to toe and still loves you dearly. He never sees this as a burden. No no. They disrespect you. They deserve this. You are an angel, his angel. Nothing can get between the two of you. He'll be torturing the prisoner while laughing and smiling and while thinking of you.
To sum it up, he is cray cray for you and would do anything. (⁠⑉⁠⊙⁠ȏ⁠⊙⁠)
———
Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?
-🌹 Never. It won't take long until he snaps, but after he kidnapped you, he won't mock nor made fun of you. But it's more into the opposite.
He'll be very gentle and soft with you. He'll even go as far as change the whole castle to your liking. Just say the word. You don't like dark colour? You want to change it to pink and purple? Sure! He'll fill out his room and office with all the books you like. You like sweets? Just nod and you'll have more than 60 different kinds of deserts and sweets in front of you.
———
Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?
- 🌹 uh yes? If you are not into physical touch, that's something he'll force on you. He'll kiss, hug, cuddle you even tho you clearly stated that you don't like it. He just doesn't care.
He lives for your touch. He needs to touch you even a little bit so that he won't lose his sanity. You're the only one that has been keeping him sane. He even goes as far as tying you up if you won't stop squirming and hitting him when he tries to give you affection. If you still won't stop squirming, he'll cry so damn hard. Snort even started to fall out of his nose, his eyes were red. And he'll keep on asking " why can't you just let him love you ", " I don't care if you hate it! You don't have to return the affection just let me love you! ".
Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?
- 🌹 It won't take long for him to open up for you. To him, when 2 people are in love with each other, there would be no secrets between them. So he would rant out to you about his whole childhood to you. He is very good and communicates too, he'll reassure you if you ever felt insecure or if you feel like he doesn't love you anymore.
____
Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?
- 🌹He would be very hurt by it but would won't show it to you because he don't want you to view him as "weak". Again he'll gladly tie you up if you won't stop fighting back. But don't worry, he won't hurt you. He'll only suffocate you with his hugs and love. So it's not THAT bad.
_____
Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?
- 🌹 Nope. These whole things aren't a game to him. Even tho sometimes you would question his actions either he really loves you or he just plays with you. And every time you ask him this, his face will drop immediately because how can you say that? He would be so confused as why would you even think that. " What makes you say that my love?! ", " am I not giving you enough love? Is that it? ", " don't EVER say that, my love for you is not a stupid game. I wish you would be able to see just how big my love for you ".
Enjoy if his darling escape? Babe the second he didn't see or have you by him he would go berserk. Sweet puppy like and clingy Raizel that you know? Gone. It's like you don't even know him. And speaking of escape. Yea, the chances of you escaping are very..very..low. with how clingy and touchy he is, yea you won't be able to escape. The top 3 reasons why you WON'T escape :
1. He's very fucking clingy (duh)
2. The security is tight af. If he can't or won't be able to cling to your side, he'll send not 1, not 2, nor 3 knights, but 5. Yea.. you bet all 6 of them are bulky ASF lol. Why 5 you ask? Well... 1 for you left, 1 for your right, 2 from your back and 2 sitting in front of you. (As if you can't protect yourself)
3. The maids, servants, butlers, knights, gardeners, cookers, everyone there would tattle if you even set food outside the bedroom. Yea all of them are snitches. Can't trust none of them.
So...yea.
____
Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?
- 🌹 Other than his clingy and touchy tendencies, he also very jealous, possessive and obsessive. When the emperor throws a welcoming party for Raizel younger brother, a duke from different nations has been hitting on you right in front of him. (Yea not a very smart move) he tries to be nice at first but when the duke won't budge, that's when he punches the duke nose and stab his eyes with a sword in front of the other guests.
The emperor saw this and he is proud. Yup you read that right. He is PROUD. Well the emperor ain't that sane and innocent either. He kidnapped Raizel's mother and baby trapped her. So you could say that he's proud because Raizel has his yandere and cray cray tendencies. Like father like son. And did the guest say or did anything? Nope. They just pretend nothing happens and just continue with what they're doing.
____
Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?
-🌹 Babies. Lots of em. Sure he's clingy, but he still needs an heir. And plus, he can imagine what it's like when you guys have children. Whose eyes would they have? It would be so adorable if the kid has your features and his personality, so that they can protect and keep an eye on you when he's not around.
The second he gets the news that you're pregnant, the whole castle would be baby proof. Every stairs would have at least 5 guards. 2 maids, 2 butlers, 4 knights would entertain your kid.
When you're pregnant, he's clingy tendencies would only increase. Whenever he goes, he would pick you up and bring you with him. He did most of the work for you, feeding you, dressing you, bathing you, picking your clothes. Everything. Oh your tummy hurts because the baby won't stop kicking? He'll rub and scold his child for hurting you. Your back and feet hurt? Come here, he'll rub and massage you until you feel better. He'll even go as far as rubbing and sucking for breast if that hurts too. Overall, he's not a bad husband or a bad father. As long as you just accept your fate and just become his, he'll give you everything you could've asked for. Nothing is too expansive or too impossible when it comes to you.
____
Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?
_🌹 He'll lash out his jealousy, but don't worry he won't harm or lash it out on you. He would find something or someone to take his anger out. Preferably someone who makes his jealousy kick in.
Let's just say if one day his jealousy gets out of hand and you're sure he will be throwing hands, you can "calm" his jealousy by holding him back while giving him a kiss on the cheeks or holding any part of his body. Touch his bicep or hand and ask him to calm down, he'll FLOP. He will forget why he is mad in the first place and will demand ask you to not stop touching him. If you did stop, he'll pout and sulk so bad that you started to feel bad. In the end, you always gave in, so he pout and sulk did its job lol.
____
Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?
-🌹On my first post about Raizel, he is a brat that always try to get y/n on trouble, he is the pain in the ass and yet, y/n still being patient with him. But what if you are not his knight? Perhaps a princess from a different kingdom?
If you are a princess, he'll approach you rather normally. Well normal in his eyes. Raizel doesn't believe in love at first sight and it would take a lot for him to like you. Let's just say that he has been keeping an eye on you for a couple of months. He'll probably ask you to dance with him and he'll make sure that your first dance is with him. After the dance is over, he won't let you go. He'll ask you if you would like to take a walk with him and he would try to get you to know better. He'll slowly try to seduce you before kidnapping you.
____
Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?
-🌹 He's sweet and soft ONLY to you. His darling. In his eyes, you are fragile and soft. He couldn't even have the heart to get mad at you. You never do wrong in his eyes. And yes, he's very different from everyone else. Even with the emperor and the empress. So it would shock both the emperor and empress when they see how affectionate he is when he's with you. But once you are not with him? Forget different, he's a whole new person. Everything irritates him. Someone sneeze or cough? He'll be yelling and throwing hands. All the servants walk in an egg shell when you're not around him. That's why, whenever you suddenly show up to his office,the prince would smile and run towards you. While the servant relaxed. He'll always send the servants out because he wants you to pour affection for him and he doesn't want anyone to see it.
____
Naughty: How would they punish their darling?
-🌹 He's the type to "punish" you with his presence lol. He'll tie you on the bed, and would cuddle, kiss you however he likes. And in the morning, if he has work to finish, he'll drag you with him. One time, he dragged you to one of his meetings with other kingdoms, you want to go to the bathroom. He insisted on coming with you. And he did. The emperor just smiles and shakes his head. In the emperor's eyes, the prince reminds him of his younger self when he first laid eyes on the empress (Raizel mother). Oh good ol days.
____
Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?
-🌹 Eh..tricky question. Depends on how you actually act. If you just accept your fate and go along with his clingy nature, you would have some freedom (but not much personal space). He won't lock you in the bedroom all day. But, if you want to take a walk or something, he has to come with you. So that he can protect you :).
If you refuse to accept him, then say bye bye to your freedom AND personal space. So my advice is just to let it all happen and you'll be happy.
____
Patience: How patient are they with their darling?
-🌹 On a scale 1-100, he's in between 60-70. He is patient, but not THAT patient. It won't take long before snap. And once he does, you have 0 chances on escaping and stuff. So better accept him from the start when he is still patient.
____
Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?
-🌹 You? Escape? HAH, you won't. But if you did, IF you did, he'll burn the village down and would target every kingdom. His sanity is gone. And when he finds you, he's not the same.
The second he found out you are dead, he didn't waste any more seconds and would kill himself. And before he kills himself, he will hug and kiss you after that, he'll lay you in his chest and off himself while saying he'll love you and he'll see you soon. (that's quite depressing than I thought.)
____
Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?
-🌹He would feel a bit sad and guilty. But only a little bit. To him, you being with him and him taking you with him are better and safer. He views the world to be very vicious and you are too fragile to be in this kind of world.
He would never let you go. letting you go never were the options. He would rather die than let you go. You are his life, without you, he won't be able to last even a day.
____
Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?
-🌹 him being the oldest, meaning he didn't have much happy childhoods. Never really had any friends to play with or even someone to be affectionate with. The emperor loves Raizel, but he just doesn't know how to show it. And the least he could do is love how he was taught by his father (Raizel grandfather). The emperor would sign him the best teacher in the kingdom and would pack his schedules with learning, swordships, dancing class, basic etiquette and more. That's what makes Raizel don't have much friend and free time when he's younger. He doesn't know how to love or how to express his emotions.
____
Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?
-🌹 No, the only different about him are his personality toward his darling. He still killed, torture, and kidnapped his darling like a classic yandere. He may not hurt you physically but he will mentally, by keeping you in his bedroom and would take all of your personal space.
____
Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?
-🌹 the fastest way for you to escape, if to let it all happen. Let him love you, worship you, touch you, cling to you. And you'll be escaping in no time. The moment you start to give in to his affections, he believes that you finally love him as much as he did to you.
____
Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?
-🌹 you are the love of his life, why would he hurt you? He will and can hurt you by not giving any personal space but that's it. He'll never hurt you physically. He would rather die than hurt you. You pouting broke his heart into a million pieces, there's no way he can hurt you.
____
Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?
-🌹 The amount of love he has for you are unexplainable. He would kiss , lick breath on the ground you walk on. Everything your body touch is something pure. In his eyes , you’re a goddess , his goddess that did no wrong in his eyes.
- he would do anything to win you over , you like cats ? He will fed all the cats in town. You like fancy things ? Everyday when you wake up , there would be new jewellery on your vanity table. You name it , anything that you fancy , he would buy it for you. He has no problem spoiling you if it means you would be his happy.
—————-
Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?
-🌹as you all aware , he’s clingy. Like , very clingy. So he doesn’t have that much of a patience when it comes to waiting. If you still doubt him in any way , but still let him touch you ( affectionately ) he would still be sane. But , if still doubt him and won’t let him touch you , that would set the ticking bomb. He could hold on for about 1 month max. ( it is what it is babe )
—————
Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?
-🌹 If it means you would be only with him then yes. For fun , nope. One of the things he scared of the most is when you giving him silent treatment or not speaking in general. Maybe because you’re just tired and don’t feel like talking but still , he hates it. He couldn’t bare the feeling not hearing your voice.
——————
🪻 A/N 🪻I'm sorry if this look rushed. I also would like to apologise for not uploading more. I'm not in my best self this past month and I'm still recovering. But don't worry, I'm fine compared to before. Millions of thank Yous to whoever that liked my previous work, it means a lot to me. My grammar is not the best, I'm not sure if I've mentioned this before, but English is not my first language and I'm still learning. I'll try to upload more in the future, and I would love it if you guys leave some suggestions or requests for my next post. And thank you to those you follow my blog, all love for you guys (⁠ ⁠◜⁠‿⁠◝⁠ ⁠)⁠♡.
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Text
To Rate a Hug - part 1 of ?
Tags: Alastor x Reader, Lucifer Morningstar x Reader, Humor, Antics, Fluff, Hugs, Reader is cat-like, shenanigans, Lucifer is a dork, Alastor is a petty bitch
part 2
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“Who, in this room, is the most huggable?” Charlie asked, grinning ear-to-ear.
Your ears twitched, tilting your head at the question. “What?”
The residents of the Hotel were playing Truth and Dare as one of the redemption activities. Something about it being a good thing to be true to yourself and others? It was originally ‘Truth or Truth’ but Angel Dust complained saying if they had to play this game at all there should be a dare option.
You, being the hotel’s very own scaredy cat, only went with the Truth option. Charlie grinned, vibrating in her seat.
“Who’s the most huggable person in the room?”
You blinked. “Specify.”
“Huh?” The princess said “Um. I. What?”
“Do you mean who do I think would physically give the best hugs, who do I want to hug personally, or like, who I think is most likely to give me a hug?” You said, rocking a bit in your seat.
“Oh! All three?”
“Ok. Um.”
You scanned the room. Charlie was vibrating with excitement, waiting for your answer. Vaggie was watching Charlie more than you, a soft smile on her face. Angel Dust struck a pose, kicking one leg up in the air and shooting you a wink. Husk was pretending he wasn’t there. Nifty wasn’t paying much attention either, flitting about dusting and the like. Alastor hadn’t bothered looking up from the book he was reading and Lucifer… was staring right at you, vibrating much the same way his daughter was.
The Morningstars were so cute.
“Um. Okay, no judgement, though?” You said, grinning sheepishly.
“Of course, of course!” Charlie said with a smile, waving away your concerns.
“Wouldn’t be judgin’ ya unless ya told us who you wanted to f-“
Vaggie whapped Angel Dust over the head with a rolled up newpaper before he could finish that sentence. She sat back down and smiled.
“Go ahead, hun.”
“Okay…” you hummed, pretending you never thought about this before in your entire after life. You had. But that’s an embarrassing thing to mention so you pretended you didn’t.
“I’d say who seemed the best at hugs, physically, would be Husk.”
The cat’s ears twitched.
“Who I’d want to hug personally would be Alastor.”
One ear flicked to point in your direction.
“And I think Charlie’s most likely to hug me.”
“You’re right!” Charlie grinned, squishing you into a hug immediately and just as quickly letting you go. “I do love to give hugs!”
You chuckled, ears laying down bashfully. “Yeah, um, okay. Who’s next?
“You spin it, toots.” Angel said, shoving the bottle from Charlie to you. The group was using an empty wine bottle as the decider, and now it was your turn. You spun it and it landed on Lucifer.
“All right, Luci. Truth or dare?”
He jumped a bit like he forgot he was participating. Rubbing the back of his neck, he looked to the side and thought the floor was a lot more interesting. “Er. Truth?”
You hummed, tapping your claw against your chin. “Ooookaayyyy… Um. What’s your favorite color of the alphabet?”
“Well-“ He stopped mid-word, blinking one eye at a time. “….What.”
You cackled, unable to help yourself. “Well?”
“Answer the question, yer majesty!” Angel chimed in.
“Yeah, Dad!” Charlie said.
“But- What- how do I- I dunno, the number 5???”
You nodded sagely. “Good answer.”
“’Eh, I prefer-“
“Angel, I swear to heaven and back if you say 69 I’m going to rip your limbs off.” Vaggie growled.
The spider shrugged “I was gonna say 420, actually.”
“Ha! Weed.” You grinned. You’ve never actually touched the stuff because it smelled gross but it was fun to joke about.
Lucifer sighed and gave the bottle a spin. It landed on Husk.
“Right, Bar Cat, Truth or Dare?”
“I have a name, your majesty.” Husk snorted. “And. Dare.”
Lucifer grinned “Hee hee hee, okay. I dare you to… make me a drink!”
Husk rolled his eyes. “Coming right up.” He got up and left, then returned with a drink he passed to the king and sat himself back down, giving the bottle a lazy spin.
The old cat was really good at the art of misdirection. So if he carefully stopped the bottle with the very edge of his tail no one would notice. Except Alastor. But he didn’t mention anything because he wanted to see where this would go.
After all, he had it land on you.
You sighed, rocking a bit in your seat. “Truth.”
“Not even gonna consider a dare?” Angel said with a huff. “Kinda boring.”
You stuck your tongue out at him. He flipped you off. Life continued.
Husk sighed, leaning against his hand and humming as though he didn’t already know his question. “Ok. I guess… Why would I be the ‘best at hugs’?”
You sunk a bit in your seat. “Um. Well. Your fur looks soft…”
Alastor’s ear twitched again.
“…and you got those big ol’ wings.”
Lucifer found the wall interesting all of a sudden.
“…and you just kind of look like a care bear.”
Angel Dust burst out laughing. Husk’s ears went back, eye twitching. “Ex-fucking-scuse me?”
You ducked your head “I didn’t- I’m sorry I didn’t mean anything bad- I-“
Husk deflated, rubbing his face. “Right, right, m’bad.” He still looked irritated but managed to get his voice to sound indifferent. “…Why do I look like a care bear?”
“The hearts.” You said meekly, pointing a claw at him. “You have hearts in your ears, little hearts for your eyebrows, and your nose is shaped like a heart, and you have hearts on your hands.”
“…You know, they’re right.” Vaggie said, glancing over at the old cat. Charlie cooed.
“I never noticed that before!”
“I did!” Nifty chirped, scuttling on top of the table. “I did I did I did!” Her eye narrowed, pointing her feather dust threateningly at all those in attendance “But no one listened to Nifty.”
“Who’s Nifty?” You said with a shit-eating grin. The small little goober’s eye widened, surprise and wonder crossing her face.
“I’M Nifty….” She hummed, tapping at her chin.
You nodded sagely. “You are Nifty.”
“All right I’m done.” Husk said, pushing out of his seat and leaving. Charlie sighed. She thanked everyone for showing up and participating and the various people in attendance left for their own rooms.
You scurried off as soon as Charlie said you were done for the day and curled into your bed happily. Sweet, sweet privacy. Away from prying eyes-
“Hello there!”
You screeched, fur floofing up to the point you just looked like a puffball with eyes.
Alastor cackled. You crawled under the blankets to hide from him. Alastor was under the blankets with you, grinning. You flailed again, scrambling off the bed and darting underneath it. Guess where the fuck Alastor was.
Several more repeats of that later and you were laying face-down into your pillows with the Radio Demon standing over you.
“Well, that was amusing!” He said.
“I’m glad you had fun.” You muttered.
“I did, I did! Now, a question.”
“And now, an answer.”
“Very good. So. Earlier you had said that you wanted to hug me?” He leaned further towards you, quirking an eyebrow. “Why?”
“To annoy you, mainly.” You said flatly. Static surged. You flinched, ducking back under the blankets. There he was again, sitting on your bed with his legs crossed, eyes glowing brighter in the makeshift blanket fort. He had his hand on your back before you could dart again, keeping you in place.
It wasn’t forceful, though. You could sliver around if you wanted. What was awkward was how close he was to you now. Eyes shining in the dark, breath warm against your face, the smell of his cologne in your nose. And those fluffy ears squished slightly by the blanket.
The Radio Demon had no business looking so huggable.
“Now was that really the reason?” He said, eyes lidded. “From your reaction to our close proximity, I feel as though you were simply teasing me.”
“Partially.” You said. “I mean, yeah, it’d be partially to annoy you. But overall you just kind of seem really…huggable.”
He rose an eyebrow “Huggable?”
“Yeah?” You snorted “That’s what the question was about?”
Alastor leaned closer, voice dropping an octave as he purred “Absolutely nothing else you were thinking about?”
“Well now I’m thinking you need a lozenge.” You said, pushing him back “Voice sounded a bit hoarse there. And before you ask, no, I’m not that stupid and I know what you’re implying. But really that’s it.  You just seem really huggable.”
“How so?” He asked, voice thankfully back to normal.
Alastor had just been messing with you the moment prior. Usually those kinds of comments lead to certain kind of things. Though he would never partake in those ‘things’, the reactions of those who found him attractive were very entertaining. This just confused him.
You shrugged. “I dunno? I just look at you and go ‘mmm yep that’s a huggable person alright’. I mean. Assuming you didn’t hurt or kill me.”
“Oh, I might.” Alastor grinned. Your flight-or-flight instincts kicked in and you jerked back, being stopped again by Alastor’s hand. The instinct kicked in a second time when your face was suddenly pressed against his chest, a deep chuckle reverberating through him. “I jest, my dear.”
“You’re the deer.” You said. He chuckled again. “So. Uh. Is this permission to hug you…?”
“Ha! No.” He shadow-traveled out from the blanket fort and the thing crashed down on you. You reacted to this startling by running straight off the bed into the wall. Alastor’s cackle echoed in your ears as you de-tangled yourself from your blankets. You shot him a peeved look before gathering up your bedding and making yourself comfortable again. Alastor was gone by the time you were settled and you rolled your eyes and decided to forget about that encounter.
However life decided you weren’t done with the day yet. Someone knocked on the door. You groaned, melodramatically opening the door up.
“Uh? Bad time?” Lucifer said with a lopsided grin.
“Oh? Nah, I’m just being silly.” You said with a shrug. “What’ s up?”
“Uh. Well.” Lucifer said, rubbing at the back of his neck “You know, earlier, when you were saying Husk was the most huggable person ‘cause of the wings and stuff? I mean. I have wings.” He materialized his wings and spread them for emphasis. “And. Uh. So. I guess I’m wondering why I‘m not huggable….?” He ducked his head down, grin wobbly as more of his face turned red.
You blinked.
“Um. Sorry?”
Lucifer’s grin dropped entirely and he started flailing his arm around “No no no! You don’t have anything to apologize for! I’m sorry- I! Fuck I’m bad at this.” He sighed, running a hand down his face. You tilted your head, confusion beginning to cross into concern territory.
“Um-“
Lucifer disappeared into a cloud of sparkles only to immediately reappear right next to you.
“My apologies for my silly doppleganger.” He said, checking his nails nonchalantly. “In anycase, I have an important question for you.”
You snorted, crossing your arms “Ah, yes. Your doppleganger. Who is not you.”
Lucifer waved you off “Most certainly not, I am a superb mentlegan- Ah, FUCK!”
Lucifer poofed into sparkles again and reappeared on your opposite side. He dusted his shirt off “Whoops, there was another one of those imposters of mine. Sorry about that.”
You covered your mouth, trying to hide your laugh. “Yeah. There seems to be a lot of those right now.”
“Indeed.” He said, checking his nails. “Can’t blame them for wanting to pretend to be the King of Hell.”
“I dunno.” You said with a hum “I’ve heard rumors the King of Hell is kind of a huge dork.”
“Ah, yes- wait really?”
You laughed. He chuckled a bit, fidgeting with his sleeves. “Uh, yeah. My antics aside. Uh. Can I ask a question?”
“Sure. I see no reason why not.” You said with a shrug.
“Um. So. How would you rate my huggable-ness?” He said, grin snaking back up on his face. You smiled at him.
“May I get a sample for study?”
Lucifer’s wings twitched “Oh-Oh! Yeah! Sure!”
You chuckled and hugged him. He went tense for a moment, stock-still. Then the King of all of Hell practically melted into you, arms wrapping around you and squeezing tightly. Wings gently curled around you both. Soft and warm.
Overall, very solid hug. Only issue is you had to lean down a bit to do so.
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lilacstro · 3 months
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i have met a few amazing professional astrologers until now, here's what I have seen and learnt (life tips edition)
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hey, its been a while since I posted anything :) a lil diff from my prev posts, this post is an observation series from the astrologers I have met. All of them, were absolutely wonderful and powerful having years of practice, some of them even having connections to influential people. My family had several connections to them because of my mother and grandmother, and basically where I am from. I am telling most generic things I have learnt while talking to them so anyone can use them as they please :)
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1.If you want to succeed with education, learning, passing some important exam and things like that, strengthen your mercury. One of the simple things you can do is, feed green to birds and animals or water plants. Could even be learning a new language
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2. Always keep your hands, and heels moisturized. It helps for a good venus.
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3. If you are someone who likes wearing black all the time, I would suggest adding some light coloured clothes to your wardrobe. If you absolutely cannot, add colours like brown, dark maroon etc.
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4.Reminds me, avoid wearing black on special days, like your birthday.
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5. If you can wear silver ornaments, please do. Wearing silver ring (check what is the right placement) or earrings, helps strengthen the moon, and helps regulate mind, and brings good luck.
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6. If you want a stronger Jupiter, wear gold. If its possible, avoid meat on Thursdays.
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7. Helping poor people, or helping anyone in general, especially women, strengthens Saturn. If possible, consider doing this every Saturday, can even be as small as feeding the stray dogs.
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8.Reminds me, disrespecting women, is one of the worst things you can do. Not only it is morally wrong, it weakens to your Saturn to a degree where you will start to loose all your material wealth. SEEN THIS 11/10 TIMES FR.
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9. Cut your nails, and put them in the soil. Maybe have a separate pot with soil and put it in there. My mother met an astrologer yesterday and this is what he said "Your nails carry energy. When you cut them off, they look for their way back to the source. When you put a dead person under the grave, the first thing that happens is the growth of nails. Disposing them in the wrong places can have very bad effects, like a bad health or luck"
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10. IF its possible, try cutting your nails, every friday.
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11.Avoid eating at places of strangers or people you arent much aware about. Food made at any body's home has energy, and if you dont know about the person, its generally a bad idea to do that.
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12. I dont know how many people know this but your name carries energy. Thats why sometimes, its suggested to change a few alphabets in your name. The way your birth numbers and name numbers synchronize is supposed to have some effect on your life. I learnt this when I met a very amazing astrologer, when he was using my name to find numbers. He showed me how exactly this works
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13. Having a strong sun can lead to a good career growth. One of the ways to do so, is wake up before the sunrise, bath before the sunrise. Avoid eating at sunsets , always keeping your home well lit at sunsets.
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14. Excessive use of substances is often related to a bad NN. NN is one of the things that defines your purpose, material wealth, unexpected changes that come (good or bad) and your decision making skills. Having a bad NN is often considered to make you act stupid, reckless, lose your money or status amongst others. Want a bad or weak North Node? please keep your home dirty, especially your kitchen and bathroom /use your footwears all inside your home and never keep your plates back into the kitchen after meals and leave them at the table unattended :)
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15.Not keeping a good personal hygiene is again a bad Venus. Also, use of perfumes or fragrances can help somewhat with strengthening your Venus.
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There is more but that's all i remember for now. Remember all of this is from a personal point of view and if you feel any of this conflicts with your morals, ethics or religion, please be free to ignore it, although I tried to keep this cut and clean as much as possible. This is from my experience and what I have seen and learnt. Astrology does affect your life but to a limit, although, I have seen a lot of this, I still believe a lot of your life is free will. Have good morals, do good, receive good. None of this works if you're downright evil lol.
support me on ko-fi :)
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all the best, leave post suggestions or feedbacks as you like :).
i love you all
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melinoelliones · 5 months
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Jax NSFW Alphabet
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I don't even know how I managed to forget to do his NSFW Alphabet... So anyways here it isss
Jax - Heat Part 2 is coming btw!!! It's almost done. Click here to read Jax Heat Part 1 if you haven't read already!
What I think he would do may not align with what YOU think he would do! I have tried to make this mostly gender neutral but I fear I slipped a bit of x Fem Reader is there. Also sorry for the ugly banner, his png's aren't great lmao.
My writing skills have fallen off since I've been off for like what 2 months, but I am working on getting better!!
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Jax is the type to talk over what you guys just did in bed, maybe mock you a bit but it always follows up with him smothering you in kisses and ass grabs. His large grin shows as he pulls you closer knowing you get embarrassed when he mocks you. 
“?!&% ?!&% ?!&%, feels so good” he moans out, mocking your previous words as you hide your head into his chest in hopes that you’ll disappear from this world. “I’m just kidding babe, you’re so hot when you do it. Lets me know i’m doing it right yanno” he jested, slapping his hand against your ass before pulling you tighter into his chest.
B = Body part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
Jax likes his hands the most. Them in contrast to your body drives him crazy, and seeing his fingers in you is insane.
His favourite part of you would be your stomach or thighs for sure. He’s a thighs guy, what can I say. When you and the guys are hanging out, he is 100% sitting with his head on your thighs or just between your legs like its nothing.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
Anywhere and everywhere. He loves to cover you in it, your perfect body being defiled by his cum is everything to him. Only he gets to do that to you, you’re his property and he can do whatever he wants with it.
He also just likes filling you with it, after rounds and rounds he gets to watch it slowly try and seep out of your precious holes.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
He enjoys watching you get off, he could sit and watch like it was a tv show. Bonus points if he can guide you through it, making you edge yourself until you ignore his commands and he has to come over and punish you.
His oral fixation comes in waves, having your tits in his mouth is like heaven. He will never tell a single soul that, even you, but we all know it. 
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
A part of me wants to say that in the outside world he’s a raging virgin, now he’s in the circus so he can just go crazy.
But another part of me wants to say he’s super experienced, but he’s never been with someone like you. Not even in a stereotypical way, but he’s just not usually into you as a type.
F = Favourite position (this goes without saying)
Mutual masterbation where ya’ll are side by side. From time to time he’ll just slide his free hand over to your body and play with it too.
Doggy but he’s so unserious with it. He’ll put his foot up by your head to make sure to get as deep as he can into you.
Cowgirl/riding and reverse cowgirl for sure. His hands are so large that they can carry your body with ease, so being in these positions means when he wants me he can just place them above your hips and slam you into him. Then he gets to watch your stomach bulge out with each stroke and your face contort.
“?!&%, well would you look at that” Jax hissed, skimming his fingertips across your stretched skin as he took in the sight of the bulge protruding from your stomach. 
Jax let out a small chuckle before grabbing your hand and placing it over the hump, “you feel that doll? You feel how full you are hmm?”. Your glossy eyes glanced into his as he began to thrust into you, your palm rising and falling with each one.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
He can be humorous but most times I don’t even think it’s intentional.
Like if he was to say “woahhh, easy there tiger. If you go that fast you’ll cum before me, and you know that's not allowed”. I’d probably laugh but he’s dead serious.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
Canonically… probably none.
To ME, he wouldn’t care to keep himself trimmed up nice. It’s a bit crazy down there but I don’t care.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
He can be both super romantic and just zoned in.
“?!&% babe keep going, my cock feels so good in that pretty throat of yours”
“Oh you poor thing, are you tired? But I’m not finished with you yet, so looks like we have a little bit longer to go”
“You’re mine, my personal fuck toy remember? So come over here, let me use your body for a bit”
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
Why would he get off himself when he has you? You can fulfill every need and more at any given time.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Dacryphilia for sure, he mocks you for crying but he want more always
“Are you crying?” he cooed, grinning as he looked down at your sweet face, your tears mixing with your saliva at the corners of your lips.
“Awww you poor thing, bit off more than you can chew did we? Better finish off what you started, you’re doing so well, I’ll make sure to paint that pretty little throat of yours white” Jax growled, caressing your damp lower face with his hand and sliding his cock deeper down your throat, your gargles slowly inching him closer and closer to ecstasy. That and the fact he could see you rubbing your thighs together for your own enjoyment.
Overstimulation and edging for sure, he’s the ultimate tease. There are days he will make you edge yourself over and over again until you can’t any longer, just to then take over and overstimulate you till your body is a mess.
Free use and CNC 100% You guys have nothing but spare time, so having you at his disposal at all times is perfect. He doesn’t care the location, who’s around or who could come around. If he wants it, he’ll have it, and everyone else will have to deal with it.
“B~But Gangle is looking for us J~Jax”, “So? Why the hell do I care? That crybaby won’t say a word regardless. I want to fill you up right here and now n no one will stop me from doing so” he vowed, unbuckling his overalls with one hand and leaning you over the railing with the other.
L = Location (favourite places to do they do)
Anywhere, he legit does not care where. He does enjoy public places though as he enjoys watching your nervous face when you hear the others roaming around, and he gets to feel you clench around him as they get closer due to fear.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
You being a brat, he likes to fuck the brat out of you. 
Also just when you’re super needy, your body listens well when it wants something.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)
Toys on himself, he really isn’t into it.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
Is it bad if I say his preference is receiving? Not saying he doesn’t give, but he prefers to get head.
“Ugh fine, stop with the frowning already and come over here before I change my mind” Jax huffed, rolling his eyes as he gestured for you to go to him. Sometimes he would act as if he didn’t want it, but he thoroughly enjoyed having you on his face, your thighs encasing his face as he got to play with you. 
“Remember dollface, I’m the one in control here, so I’ll have you here until all you can focus on is my tongue against you”
He enjoys head, so much so that he just has to fuck you after every time.
“?!&% you did so good, so ?!&%ing good baby” he breathlessly huffed, tangling a large portion of your hair into his hand and sliding you off of his dripping cock, a mixture of spit and cum still connecting you to it as he yanked you up. 
Before you could even really comprehend what was going on, your lips met his, resulting in the neediest of kisses. You hadn’t even had a chance to take a breath before, both of your hands now roughly exploring eachothers bodies, you both wanted nothing more than to be one.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Both. Sometimes he just needs to be balls deep in you, crashing into you with no remorse. Other times he likes to take it slow and and make sure you feel every touch.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
Daily. Not much else to do is there.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
All the time, again, y'all have endless time so why not?
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
He can go like 4-5 rounds back to back, others just 2 but a load of oral in between.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
On you he loves them, especially the vibes. Making you have one on you while you guys are with the others is like entertainment for him. Having to watch you squirm in silence while the others stare, oblivious as to why you're so antsy. 
“Are you okay? You’re acting like Pomni right now?”, “They’re fineeee, aren’t you? Go on, tell them” Jax jested, turning up the vibe as you went to open your mouth, knowing full well you wouldn’t be able to form a straight sentence with it that high.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
To the point that it could drive one insane.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
He isn’t too loud but he likes to dirty talk, he knows it turns you on.
“Does my cock feel that good? You’re drooling”
“Go on, cum on this cock. Make sure everyone knows it’s yours”
“You think Caine can see us right now hmm? Lets put on one hell of a show for him, I know he probably has one hell of a filthy mind. If he didn’t, wouldn’t he have stopped up by now?”
“You’re so ?!&%ing lucky I can’t breed you in this place”
“Do you want the others to hear you? Because you aren’t too good at holding your tongue”
“I’m gonna fill you up nice and good, only I can violate this, it’s mine”
“Stop covering your mouth, I need to hear how well I fuck you”
W = Wild card (a random dirty headcanon for the character)
He wants to watch you fuck someone else, just so he can see how pathetic they are at making you feel good. Only he can make you cum, only he knew your sweet spots and what you liked. You’re practically molded to him, you are his and no one will compare, but he wants to watch someone try.
Jax watched as one of the NPC’s he had snuck in frantically fucking you, your fake moans only making him sigh heavily in the chair at the end of the bed. He was almost getting annoyed at the fact that this NPC was barely even trying, he was just using your body at this point. 
“Don’t worry baby, I’ll make sure you actually cum” Jax reassured, caressing your cheek before making his way to your legs, “A* for effort but you’re done” he scowled, shoving the NPC aside before he could even consider defiling your body any further.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
Its girthy and long. It took you a long time to get use to, but now nothing else can satisfy you.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
It can go from wanting it everyday to just tired of it.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterward)
It can be pretty instant after the aftercare, but even while asleep his body still pulls you into him for security.
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max1461 · 6 months
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One thing that was hard for me to get used to when I started learning math was what I call "static thinking". Math doesn't have any time evolution; everything either is or it isn't.
When non-mathematicians think about operations like addition, they think of them as "processes" that "occur": you take 2 and 8 and "combine them" to get 10. The expression "2+8" is like a sort of command, telling you to perform this process of addition. People think of math this way because it's basically how math is presented in schools.
To a mathematician, the expression "2+8" is not a command and it does not signify a process. "2+8" is merely another way of writing "10". They are two expressions with identical meaning. That's what "2+8=10" means, it means "these two expressions signify the same thing". There is no "process of addition" which "happens" and "results in 10". "10" and "2+8" are just alternate spellings of the same number.
For a more advanced example, consider the formal definition of a finite state machine. Intuitively, we think of a finite state machine as a network with various nodes and directed edges and so on, into which we input some string in the machine's alphabet. After inputting the string, it travels around the machine according to the transition functions before finally arriving (or not) at a final node, and by this process a computation is performed. Of course, mathematically, this is nonsense. A finite state machine is a network with various nodes and directed edges and so on, but the notion that you can "input a string" and it will "travel around the network via the transition functions" is bullshit. A string is recognized by the machine if and only if there exists a valid path for that string via the transition functions from an initial node to a final node. The string never actually travels the path, because such a notion does not exist in mathematics.
A finite state machine is not a machine, it never actually does anything. It sits there in the realm of abstractions, unmoving and static. Every string which it "recognizes" it recognizes by dint not of things that it does but of facts that simply are; every string recognized by the machine is so and has been so since the dawn of time, without the machine ever in fact going about the process of recognizing it.
This is philosophically a little bit trippy, but it can also confuse early math students in practice, too. As I mentioned at the top, I was very confused by it. For instance, in the finite state machine example, a perfectly ordinary statement to encounter in a proof might run something like
[Block of reasoning establishing that some string w is recognized by the machine M] [Block of reasoning establishing that all transition functions into a final node F of M have label x] ...since w is recognized by the machine M, there must exist a transition function T whose target is a final node and which sends w to that final node on the last character of w. Thus, since T must have label x, the final character of w is x.
To a mathematician this seems perfectly trivial. To me as a young math student, this kind thing seemed almost miraculous. We don't even know what w is, and yet we can run it through the machine? And from the fact that the machine recognized it, we can conclude things about what w is? We can tell its final character? How is that possible? I felt like this kind of thing involved "reaching into the future", reasoning about processes from the end when we haven't even begun them yet.
But, of course, we can do this, because there is no past or future in mathematics. The machine is simple there, the string is simply recognized or not, its last character simply is x or it isn't x. Nothing has to "happen".
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any opinions on alternative english writing systems i.e. the shavian alphabet
english has demonstrated that it doesn't work very well with an unmodified version of the latin alphabet; however,
the problems with the english writing system are kind of overstated, and
there isn't any authority that could enforce a change to a different alphabet, which is kind of necessary for huge spelling reforms like that. the closest we have the u.s. federal government, but usamericans would resist any changes to english orthography quite violently, believing it to be a commie/jewish/terrorist/whatever plot. furthermore,
most alternatives ive seen feel like they're trying too hard to be Latin 2 rather than a script that uniquely works for the english language, possibly as an attempt to appear more legitimate via eurocentrism.
i think a better alternative would be something like an english shorthand script, which are all specifically made to make writing common english words as easy as possible, though they would require some training.
a good intermediate solution (read: the only solution that is actually possible) would be to just stop correcting other people's spelling. if you understand what someone is trying to write, they've spelled the word correctly. however, for this to actually matter would require some significant institutional changes, albeit smaller and fewer than changing the script entirely.
deseret does have a letter called gay that looks like an amogus, though, which is the best case ive ever heard for a (traditional) alternative english script. unfortunately, it was also created by mormons.
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xerotiny99 · 6 months
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2 AM Call // Our Precious #1
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2 AM Call (Our Precious series #1)
M.list ┃Next Part
Pairing: Jeong Yunho x Reader
Warning: dom!yunho, sub!reader, suggestive, sexting, phone sex, a lot of dirty talk (seriously, really filthy), masturbating, etc...
Note: if any of the above-mentioned topics trigger you then you can click off. :) also, do not proceed if you're below 18.
An Extra Note: this is a mini - or - a long series, and I'm too lazy to make a different book for it. Hence, I'll be adding all the planned/written chapters of this series in this book. It'll be in second person pov, but instead of writing [y/n] — cause I'm too lazy, really — I'll be writing Angel. So, the reader's name is Angel for this series. This series revolves around polygamy, which means the reader will be involved with ot8; the chapters will unfold slowly from the beginning and follow a storyline.
Gist: being in your sophomore year of college, you meet a very cute and handsome bookstore clerk. You happen to exchange numbers and on the same night, he's all you can think about. When you decide to ring him up, it's 2 AM and both of you have different things on your minds.
Word Count: 5,471
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Lehninger.
Lehninger.
Albert Lehninger.
Principles of Biochemistry.
         You grumble under your breath, shifting your eyes chaotically around the shelves of hardcover books aligned in alphabetical order. The wooden shelves feature biochemistry books, and out of all these, you needed only one, which apparently was too hard for your eyes to search. Scorching sun outside is far less preferable than the air conditioning of the second-hand bookstore you were in, so you decide to stay in and pass a few more minutes looking through the books.
Maybe, you could find something worthwhile in store, perhaps something other than textbooks and thesis unrelated to your university work. Sighing, you bend over slightly to grasp the titles inscribed on the spines of several other books.
"It could be here, maybe." you thought to yourself.
"Hi, how can I help you?" a cheery yet raspy voice cuts through your thoughts, "are you looking for a specific book?"
Your attention turns towards the humbly speaking man, and once your gaze falls onto him, and his smile, you hold your breath. He was...ethereal; clad in a beige coloured cardigan and a white turtleneck under it, the man's demeanour was stoic and poised yet friendly and warm. Towering over and looking down at your petite stature, he smiles widely, politely waiting for you to reply. You take a minute longer to stare and notice all finer details on his face; his porcelain skin, pretty pink lips, a straight nose—almost sculpted, and his innocently shaped doe eyes just boring into yours.
There it goes without saying, you were drooling over him. He was attractive, no doubt, but the way he offered you a benign smile made your heart lurch a bit was far more beguiling than his looks. In all seriousness, it had been more than a minute or two since you had been silently checking him out; you had failed to notice the heap of books he was holding in his arms before, but now that you do, you mentally groan at his bulging arms with prominent veins on the back of his hands.
"Hello—"
"—yeah, no. I mean, I was actually looking for...Lehninger—um, biochemistry?" you stutter and ramble, lastly stringing your words into a question.
"Oh, wait. Give me a minute, I'll check it in our database." Carrying the books in his hands, he nudges you to follow him with a nod.
You do cluelessly follow him but enjoy the view of his rear; you really needed to snap out of it! He guides you to the front desk where the cash register was situated, and a computer was stowed away on the other side of it. Thump the books go, having been put down on the desk by him before he leans over the computer to type. Standing on the other side of the desk, you watch him do the work, with your arms folded over your chest.
In the heat of the moment, you're reeling back to checking him out; silverbluish hair styled in a mullet, the puffy strands kissing the collar of his turtleneck, his eyelashes batting every two seconds at the blaring computer screen—you bite down on your lip when libidinous thoughts swarm your mind. His hands, those sleek fingers pressing down the keys on keyboard...how good would those feel as they're pumping in and out of your cunt.
"Oh, okay. Got it!" he squeals softly, turning to you, "looks like we've got one copy of the sixth edition. Would that be alright?"
You flinch, snapping from your thoughts and realising you really needed to get laid, at least to get your mind straight.
"Ah," you take some time to comprehend his words, "sure. I don't mind, to be honest. Only need it as a reference for my assignment."
"You could've issued this book at the university library, why didn't you?" he asks, stepping out from the counter and guiding you back to the wooden shelves.
You look at your feet, stumbling behind him, unsure of what to say. "I believe it's better to have a personal copy instead of issuing it from the library since I'm going to need till my senior year. Couldn't afford a new one, so I thought why not invest in a second-hand."
He heaves out a gentle chuckle, halting his steps in front of a shelf. "That's fair. So, Horizon University?"
"Yeah," you mumble. "Got a scholarship and everything...how did you..."
"It's the only university close by, and I'm in my senior year there, well, at the end of it—only one more month left till I graduate." he starts rummaging through the racks in the shelf to find your book. "Dance major."
"Sophomore year here, zoology major." he hums, looking at you and pulls out a thick book from the shelf. You continue in a hushed voice, "I've still got two years left in that hellhole."
"You don't like the university?" he questions, as a matter of factly.
"No. Not really. Not that I know I can't make friends for fucks sake," you state.
"You haven't met the right kind of people yet, it's fine. You will soon." he flashes you a toothy grin. "Do you need anything else?"
"No, I'm good." you whisper, "I'll hopefully vibe with someone soon, can't be alone all the time."
"Like I said, you will. Hang in there," he reassures you with his smile going deep in his cheeks, "I'll ring this up for you, come on."
By the cash register, you pay the respective amount while he puts the book in a paper bag having the store's name printed on top of it.
As he hands you the bag, he chimes, "there you go."
You take the bag in your hands, but don't leave just yet; you didn't want to leave him. Drawn to his charismatic presence, you stay behind for a long second. You're staring into each other's eyes, intently lingering onto the disguised inklings in either of your minds. The space around you seems so suffocating, heavy and laden with thick air. In the pit of your stomach, there's an urge you want to act on, you want to tear your gaze away from him and continue on with the rest of your day.
But you can't.
And your heart doesn't want to, thinking there's a possibility of you engaging with him on a romantic level.
From the corner of your eye, you watch his lips twitch into a tiny smile; he scurries his hand on the desk and pulls out one of the store's business cards. He has a sharpie ready on him, and scribbles something on the back of the card.
"Just in case, here's my number. Give me a call, or a text. Would like to hang out with you some time," he slides the cards across the desk to you, "I'm Yunho, by the way."
You take the card and slip it in the pocket of your dress; yes, you wore a clingy summer dress with pockets because pockets are a lifesaver.
"My name's Angel."
"I look forward to hearing from you, Angel."
And you did find something better in there, other than books.
The day rolls by as smoothly as it should, after leaving the bookstore you make your way back to your dorm room in the university to keep the book in your room and grab your laptop as you decide to spend the rest of your morning in the campus cafe. Musty notes of coffee linger in the air while you save Yunho's contact into your phone and work a little on your assignment. All your lectures, you whiled the time thinking about Yunho—his face, his voice, his fingers, his body—you were starting to realise how reprehensibly had this man taken up every fraction of your mind.
You weren't complaining, though. But it was proving to be very distracting amidst your lectures. Coming back to your dorm room, lethargic from the humdrum day of lectures and practical work, you lay in your bed. Mindlessly, you pick your phone and go through your socials, especially Yunho's. He has to have an Instagram page at least. And to your surprise, he does. You come across a public account with few of his photos. You didn't get to see much of him however, as the photos were mostly of him either looking away from the camera or hiding his face behind his hands. Heaving an exasperated sigh, you lock your phone and go on about the rest of your day.
As night dawns in, you're back in your bed after eating dinner. You've done all of your nightly routine and are freshly showered. You wear a dark brown cardigan over your black lingerie; really not in the mood to change into sleepwear because of the buzzing heat of summer. Again, mindless thoughts pop in your head and you grab your phone to check any texts from your nonexistent friends. It's not like you didn't have any friends, you didn't prefer to make friends—regardless, you did have one friend in the entirety of your university. He was a bunny-eyed man with deep brown hair, and a baby yet stoic face; Choi Jongho. But you spoke to him occasionally and only interacted when needed to.
Opening the messaging app on your phone, you almost make sure to have a double take when you see Yunho's name at the top with very recent messages from him. Yep. It was him. You checked it twice only to be sure and it was his contact number. Stifling a squeal, you open your chats.
Yunho: Hey! Just wanted to make sure you got to your dorm room safely. And how's that book working out for you?
[Sent 22:39 pm Read 1:06 am]
So, he needed an excuse to text you. How adorable.
You: Hi Aren't you quick to text me? ^^ It's alright. And... The book makes me want to hit my head against a wall.
[Sent 1:07 am Read 1:07 am]
Yunho: Ouch :( I have no idea what works in biochemistry. Sadly. But hang in there! And ofc Thought I'd keep you company since you're a loner.
[Sent 1:09 am Read 1:10 am]
You: I have friends, mister!
[Sent 1:10 am Read 1:12 am]
Yunho: Yeah You do Imaginary friends don't count.
[Sent 1:12 am Read 1:13 am]
You: I do have a friend! Don't underestimate me.
[Sent 1:14 am Read 1:15 am]
Yunho: "a" friend I'm not tbh But who's this friend?
[Sent 1:16 am Read 1:17 am]
You: He's in my department We've got couple of classes together
[Sent 1:17 am Read 1:18 am]
Yunho: well then I'll let you talk to him
[Sent 1:19 am Read 1:19 am]
You felt a pang of pain bubble in your chest, but your mind couldn't figure out why you were hurting over his response.
You: Why do you sound mad?
[Sent 1:19 am Read 1:35 am]
Yunho: I'm not :)
[Sent 1:35 am Read 1:36 am]
You: k.
You roll your eyes and blink away the weirdness. Now, your silly anguish had been replaced with anger and frustration. In fact, you wondered why you felt so silly about this ordeal when he was the one to initiate texting you. They say men have a golden rule of texting, that is, they'd wait three days until texting. But it turns out Yunho was little too eager to talk to you. Shaking your head, you sit up straight in your bed and puff your cheeks. Your eyes glaze over your reflection in the full-length mirror in front of your closet.
An idea sparks your curiosity, and you smirk to yourself. Bringing your phone back in your hand, you angle it at a specific point to get your entire body in the frame. You take a mirror selfie, perched by the edge of the bed, your cardigan loosely hanging over your shoulder to expose your lingerie and a good amount of your cleavage, your hair flowing down on one side of your shoulder, and your eyes remain emotionless. Having no perceivable clue of your behaviour, you slump yourself back in bed and purposely send the picture to Yunho. You wait for a minute to pass when you text him back.
You: *sent attachment*
You: Oh god! Didn't meant to send it to you. Can you delete it, please?
[Sent 1:45 Read 1:45]
Yunho: Oh ... Well I saw it. And it's only fair if you... *sent attachment*
[Sent 1:46 Read 1:47]
You feel the buzz in your head, upon checking out the attachment he sent you. Thinking it'd be a normal photo, you didn't pay too much attention to it, but maybe you should have, and you did exactly at your second take of the photo. It was him, obviously; he was sitting in a gaming chair, legs widespread, wearing his loose sweatpants under a haze of dim lights of his room. One of his hands held his phone as he clicked the picture, while the other palmed his crotch. And then you saw it, his boner, protruding from the sweatpants. You mentally tried to gauge his size by the pronounced outline on his pants. And you were impressed.
The heaviness in your head grows when you notice his sly smirk in the photo, and the bulging veins on both of his hands; he wanted to rile you up, just the way you did. Though, if there could be a difference, you did it out of spite and he was doing it to get back to you. Squeezing your thighs together, you tried to control your urges, the same stupefying urges you got when you saw him in the bookstore this morning. The suppression of your desire leads to you heaving out a deep breath, wanting to get back at him for ruining your peace with that photo.
You: someone's all worked up. what were you thinking about?
[Sent 1:50 am Read 1:51 am]
Yunho: Just something Or someone
[Sent 1:51 am Read 1:52 am]
You: I wouldn't mind taking a peek in your head ;)
[Sent 1:53 Read 1:53]
Yunho: Do you really want to know what I'm thinking about?
[Sent 1:54 Read 1:55]
You: Yes Unless you don't want to.
[Sent 1:56 Read 1:57]
Yunho: I'd be the one to ask you that Are you sure you want to know?
[Sent 1:57 Read 1:58]
For some reason you could picture him with a conceited smile on his face, still sitting on the chair and his legs wide apart while he rubs his cock through his sweats.
You: You like teasing don't you?
Yunho: Oh I love it
You: I'll tell you what. I've been thinking about you since the morning
Yunho: Hmm Likewise I've been thinking about all the things I'd do to you if you were here with me
You: and what would you do?
You draw in a sharp breath, chest heaving up and down when your mind fogs with the thoughts of him doing filthy things to you.
Yunho: For the starters... I'd gently kiss your lips While ripping the buttons off your sweater Taking it off Letting my hands roam your body
Reading his texts, you pull at the buttons on your sweater, one by one and eventually shrugging it off from your body. You tremble slightly as you proceed to text him with one hand.
You: Go on...
Yunho: I'd pin you to the bed Make sure your hands are above your head Kiss you so hungrily. use my hands to feel all of you. And take off whatever that's remaining on your body Id tease you a hell a lot Fukc Ferl your bdy shuddre under mine when I drg my fingerss down to yor wet pussy Pusj my fingers deep in you knuckles feep Make you mewl as my fingers pumped in and out ... Fuck I want you so bad
That was the point of no return for you, you were deeply invested in this game, in this stupid act of desperation where all you could think about was his texts. It brings your colourful imagination to mind, visualising his texts as you rub your fingers on your now-aroused cunt through your dripping wet panties. you noticed the typos in his texts, probably from him typing with his one hand while his other remained busy. 
Taking a deep breath, you rest against the headboard of your bed, your legs spread a little to make it easier for your hands to rub you. You bite your lip, thinking more of him, thinking of his sleek fingers sawing you out while he's knuckles deep in your cunt.
You: I want you too So so bad I want your fingers in me I want you to loosen me up nice for your cock to pound into me
You finally decide to push your panties to the side, while ghosting your fingers over your clit before you let them submerge in your heat. Your arousal coats your fingers as they slick back and forth, at a steady pace, in your cunt. Your mind is already long gone to the end where you were only yearning for him to make you feel good. Noticing how your phone hadn't buzzed for a long time, you shift your attention to it and instead of his texts, you see him calling you. Hesitation knocks at your door, but you're too far gone from rationality to think about it. As you answer his call and press your phone to your ear, you hear his ragged breathing. It brushes your ear and tickles you, springing up goosebumps on your skin, as though he was right next to you in your bed.
"You really know how to make a man all worked up, don't you?" he hisses, "don't worry, princess. I'll make you feel good."
You take in another deep breath through your mouth, bringing your fingers out of your cunt. Hovering them over your chest, you push the cups of your bra down and grope your breasts; you pinch your nipples, fondle and knead your tits to get yourself in the mood. He doesn't know about it, but your fantasies run wild—with him as he fills his hands with your tits, groping and fondling them, maybe even more.
"What is my Angel doing right now? Are you touching yourself at the thought of me pinning you down to the bed and fucking you relentlessly?" he asks, and your mind pictures it word to word.
"Yes. I want you to—I want you to fuck me foolish—make me—make me see stars—while—while your cock rams into me..." you stutter, struggling to strip yourself out of your lingerie.
"Pretty filthy thoughts for a beautiful face like yours, Angel." His tone is teasing as he continues, "wanting a stranger you just met to do all these vile things to you...you're a cum-slut aren't you?"
Dirty talk was never your cup of tea, it made you cringe internally but there was something about Yunho's deep and sultry voice that made you wet, insanely wet. You bite your lip, conscience half gone to the sound of his trembling breathing, and rub your clit—the sensation only brings butterflies in your stomach, because in your mind those were his fingers and not yours. In your mind everything you did to yourself was replaced with him, and it was enough to get you started.
Biting back on a moan, you reply, "yeah...I want you to—I want you to do all the vile stuff to me."
You hear certain shuffling in the background alongside a long pause and then, your ears catch up on his soft little grunts. Nothing prepared your imagination for what you were thinking; him in his bed or just in his gaming chair, with his cock out, stroking himself at the thought of you.
"Your—your wish is my command," he growls, his deep voice resonating in your ear, "would love to finger your tight little cunt, drawing out these pretty moans from your mouth..."
You slide one finger down your slit, and eventually ease it in your hole; it brought discomfort at first, a little, but when you started moving it deep within you, you felt your walls clench slightly around it.
"Fuck...yes, I want you to spread—spread me open with your fingers."
He did not need to know that you were fingering yourself, your voiceless grunts and whispers were enough for him to imagine it. Picturing you plunge your fingers into your cunt, he increases the pace of his hand stroking his cock; though, he keeps himself steady. He couldn't really help himself and gradually increases the rhythm of his movements.
"Add another finger, baby." he mumbles, closing his eyes and leaning back against his chair.
You oblige, adding another finger in your hole.
"How does it feel?"
"Good—feels good, Yunho." You mewl his name, scissoring your fingers inside of you.
"You're doing great, princess. Now, curl your fingers..." he manages to squeak out in a whisper, pumping his cock with busy motions.
His chest rises and falls rhythmically to your moans, and you do as he says; curling your fingers inside you, you feel a certain warmth lingering in your stomach. You were getting close to your climax, without even having to anything more—the knot strikes a jolt of tightness in the pit of your stomach, and you moan out loud. Really loud.
"I want you to feel me, Yunho." you breathe out, aroused. "I want to feel you too—feel your cock sliding in and out of me—fucking me good with it."
"Oh baby," he goes silent for a second, focused on stroking himself, "I'll fuck you good—I'll fuck you till you're begging for me to stop..."
"Ah fuck," you arch your back off the mattress, trying to chase your high.
Your fingers plunge in and out, increasing tension in your stomach and gut; your tightness was gradually easing up, and so you decide to insert another finger in. The stretch stung, however, pleasurable, making you whimper his name out loud.
"Yunho...!"
"Yes, baby, I know." he winces in diversion. "Hold on a little longer, I'm close—I'm close too."
He breathes out, increasing the pace of his hand; his cock slick with his precum and it spreads along the shaft as he continues to pump himself. You could hear the strain in his voice, indicating you, he indeed was close to his own climax; you were too, knowing your fingers were hitting your sweet spot every time they thrusted in you. Keeping your phone on loudspeaker, you set it on the nightstand and use your other hand to rub your clit. You increase the pace of your fingers, flesh squelching, your juices lightly lapping against your fingers—the knot tightens delicately in your stomach as your tempo remains constant.
Yunho bucks his hips into hands, composing himself as he thrusts his cock into his hand, thinking about your tight cunt. He has a colourful mind too, picturing himself rocking his hips so that his cock hits all of your deepest parts. His lungs convulse, fighting the urge to moan but it breaks out of his lips anyway. He moans your name, shaking and struggling to hold his phone next to his ear—he does the same as you, sets his phone aside while keeping it on speaker.
"Such a dirty little slut, fingering herself to the thought of my cock thrusting into her," his voice gives you a push, fuels your soul with the fire it lacked. In retrospect, he needed something too, to tip him off his edge as he fucked his hand. "Fuck...needs my cock to make her happy..."
"Yes, please," you cry, tears rolling down the side of your face as your fingers do their work.
Your high was approaching you, so close, almost there. The limit to hold it in was past the point, he could say something and you would be riding down your orgasm—you needed him, his voice, his words. On the other hand, Yunho's patience was running thin, he wanted to finish it off—feeling the warmth of his hand pushing him to his edge, he smirks to himself and throws his head back.
"Are you close, princess? Cause I am..." he grunts.
You nod your head, pursing your lips together to make a gentle sound of humming. You didn't realise it yet, but you were bucking your hips to your fingers, letting them curl and slip in deep inside you; grinding your hips against your fingers, you let out a satisfied groan—the tightness in the pit of your stomach comes undone. Rummaging your hand to hold the headboard behind you, you brace yourself as your high washes over you with a vehement intensity. You let our shaky breaths, well beyond being breathless, as your fingers slowly make their way out of your heat. Your chest rises and falls, tremors spread under your skin with your juices dripping down your inner thighs.
"Fuck, princess..."
His groan is a little static, coming from your phone as it leaves your imagination to run wild. You picture him slumped in his chair with his load spurting out to stain his lower abdomen and clothes. In reality, Yunho breathes through his mouth, letting it fall agape when his high comes crashing down onto him. He had never felt such rush of satisfaction by only indulging himself with you on call; he had never felt himself cumming so hard for anyone with any real action, but here he was, panting and shaking, stroking off his climax as he grimaced at his hand full of his cum.
There's a long moment of silence between you two, and in that silence, the post-orgasm clarity sinks deep within you. The thought of you being so indecent with a man you met in the morning, not even knowing him for more than a day, brought some coherence to your mind. Though, the best is to let it go and keep it in your bounds of inadvertent thrills of late night.
Your body feels languid, and tired; wondering the same for him.
"That was..."
"It happened in the moment," Yunho breathlessly pronounces, "we're just two strangers who have nothing to do with each other, right?"
"Well..."
You sit straighter in your bed, staring at your phone as you bite your lip; you were waiting for him to speak.
"Well what?" he mumbles, a sly smile stretching his lips.
"I thought...never mind. I'm way over in my head." You shrug it off, pulling the sheets over your body as the embarrassment drowned you out. "It's fine, we'll pretend this never happened."
"What? Are you crazy?" his voice is much clear now, with the obvious tone of bewilderment. "Gosh, Angel. You don't know how hard I came for you. I can't pretend this never happened; instead, I wouldn't mind giving us..."
He trails, dragging his words in a whisper with hopes of you completing him. "...giving us a try, like just keeping our relationship exclusive to sex?"
"If you're down for it." he mumbles, "I don't want to do anything that you're uncomfortable with."
"I'll think about it."
You smiled to yourself, thinking about that possibility. When the sun rose to a new day, you found yourself pondering. Not exactly in the 'deep venture' of it, but you just kept your mind busy with Yunho's proposal and thought of the consequences if you were to ever agree to it. Friends with benefits with a soon-to-graduate hot senior? That sounds tempting, a lot, it also fuels your infatuation with him. But on the other hand, you didn't want to go down that road with him. There were second thoughts in your mind, of course there'd be—you maybe, sort of, liked this man, after all, he does give off the vibes that he'd be a great boyfriend. You didn't want to ruin that possibility with him.
The rest of your day goes as scheduled, you attend a few of your lectures in the morning. Currently, it's afternoon and you have last of your classes to attend. Amidst all the excitement and stress, your friend, Jongho texts you, asking you to get him your lab-coat for his practical class. You find him standing in front the chemistry department, smiling and engaged in a chatter with someone else. And upon noticing it from afar, the person who he was talking to was Yunho. It was such a contrast, both were happy-go-lucky kind of guys, but Jongho seemed more innocent than Yunho (after the night you had spent with him, it was hard to picture him being anything but innocent). You could make it out from his tall built, and silver-bluish hair styled in a mullet, regardless with his back facing you. Hesitation stricken, you somehow manage to make your way to him; because Jongho had already noticed you even before you turn around and run away.
"There she is!" Jongho glees, and Yunho turns around, meeting your eyes. "Thank you so much for bringing it, I really despise prof. Yuen when he gets all judgmental about 'forgetting' to bring a lab-coat to his practical class."
"Hey, no worries," you smile at him, handing him your lab-coat. "I have his practical class day after tomorrow, till then the coat is yours." You laugh it off, awkwardly glancing at Yunho.
Jongho notices the out-of-ordinary ogles you made at Yunho, chiming in, "oh right, Angel, this is Yunho. I live with him and six other guys. But that's not important and ummm.." he looks at Yunho, scratching the back of his neck, "she's Angel, my only friend in this university."
Yunho smiles warmly at you, his eyes crinkling at the corners as he does. "Oh so, it's her you can't stop chattering about?" he chuckles lightly, "and what do you mean 'your only friend' aren't we your friends too?"
Jongho rolls his eyes, "you guys are nothing but a pain in the ass. Just today, in the morning Wooyoung and San drank all the milk and kept empty containers back in the refrigerator. I had to crunch on cereals before heading out for my morning classes."
"So, are you tainting all others because of those two individuals?" Yunho retorts.
You purse your lips together, ineptly crossing your eyes between them; you were aware of Jongho's living condition, but you could have never expected Yunho to be one of his flatmates. It was true, Jongho lived with seven other guys from the university, some of them having a full time job, and at times he would complain about them to you. Though you never really focused too much on what he had to say, or even catch their names.
"Uhhh..." you trail, offering them a tight lipped smile.
"Angel, come on, back me up." Jongho grumbles.
"I can't say anything about your flatmates, Jongho." The chestnut-haired man rolls his eyes, and you continue, "but I've always listened to your rants."
"I bet you're a good listener, Angel." Yunho taunts you, "and an even better friend to him."
"She is," Jongho breaks out in a smile. "Hey, you should totally come over on Thursday. We've got a game night planned."
"Uh, Jongho, I don't think I'd want to play board games with eight guys." You mutter under your breath.
"Who said we play board games?" Yunho says, drawing his brows together. "Though, it'll be fun for a while, having a girl over."
"Yes, Angel. You should consider it. Just—just think about it okay?" the enthusiasm in Jongho's voice isn't hard to ignore. "Now, I've got a class, so I'll see you in a bit."
With that he disappears, leaving you and Yunho stranded alone with nothing to talk about or a lot to talk about.
"What a lovely coincidence," Yunho begins, smiling at you, "the girl he talked about was you all along; well, he painted a pretty picture of you in our heads."
"I see Jongho as anything but more than a friend." you pout, "and this game night, should I even consider coming?"
"Well, it depends on you, princess," he smirks, "it depends on whether or not you could keep your hands to yourself. Because I'll be there."
"Oh, don't put yourself on a high pedestal, mister." You roll your eyes, "I'll think about it."
"Don't you have a lot to think about already?" he steps closer to you, towering over you as he leans close to your ear, "I don't think I can go on without touching you for the entire time you'd be there, so really do think about it."
He straightens up and mumbles one last time before leaving you completely high and dry.
"And if you do come, I will really fuck you senseless."
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Next Part ┃ M.list
524 notes · View notes
almondamaretto · 6 months
Note
hii i loved ur crossfaded story, do u think u could do some stoner matt bf hcs? 🫶🫶
YESSSSS omg girl u have good taste
i was looking for an excuse to write ts. also not proofread!! and not good because i was high!!
stoner!matt x afab!reader
warnings: use of weed, smut
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— ok lets get one thing straight, this man is one of those deep thought, random fact stoners that make you rethink everything about the world.
— "who decided that the alphabet was in alphabetical order? maybe we wanted e first, yknow?"
— always has at least one joint or the makings for one joint on him at all times. not as bad as chris who i would imagine carries around like 2-3 all the time.
— i would give anything to see this man rolling a fuckin joint.
— feels like an unpopular opinion i'm not sure, but he definitely thinks watching his girl roll one is hot. especially if you're not as experienced as him, yet still make an effort to try and impress him.
— if you're a stoner, he's buying you cute shit. cute papers, a cute grinder, lighters and stash boxes.
— is either non-verbal while high or actually yapping with no in between, but the simple truth his, he wants to be touching you at all times.
— imagine js sitting there, chatting his ear off, reflecting on your day n he's just staring, completely engrossed. meanwhile his fingers have been trailing up and down your thigh...
— or, he's running his mouth while taking a hold of your hand, leaving chaste kisses all over your hand, face, neck, and lips, only quiet whilst doing so.
— would def always be down to smoke w you, he could never say no to his sweet girl.
— loves to smoke in a group with his brothers, closest friends, and you cause he is a big quality time guy, but there is something so satisfying about being alone with you, watching the way you move through the haze filling the room.
— i think he would get more jealous while under the influence, you just look so good and he knows what every other guy is thinking.
— he is obviously very touchy and needy when he's high, but he also speaks in such an insatiable way, voicing all his dirty thoughts with no reserve.
— "and that's when- wow i can't shut up" "i could think of a few ways to shut you up."
— and you're gagged. figuratively and literally.
— one day, the friend group is at a party or some type of event. you and matt are nowhere to be found though, tucked away in some large room behind a locked door, the window cracked open.
— the roach of a used up joint was thrown onto the bedside table, hands now busy with pulling each other impossibly closer.
— he had pulled you up onto his lap, large hands gripping your ass as you pressed against his hard-on. your lips were quickly pressed together in sloppy kisses, your hands exploring his torso enthusiastically, his grazing up your sides and ass.
— "you were sittin' so pretty down there for me doll. did you really expect me to not pay attention?"
— he grumbles out while his lips ghost over your neck. you practically melt into his hands.
— chris came banging on the door, talking about something neither of you had interest in. matt never faltered in his movements, continue to squeeze your ass and nibble on your neck and chest.
— "matt!" "shh, stay quiet for me baby, he'll leave soon."
— when chris persists, he's groaning loudly and laying you gently on the bed, leaving a final kiss to your lips. he swings the door open to reveal only himself, blood-shot eyes and lip gloss smeared over his lips. his hair was jostled every which way, chest heaving slightly.
— chris just grins and shakes his head, mumbling something to matt that undoubtedly makes him roll his eyes.
— "nick and i wanna go to this other party madi's going to, you gotta drive us."
— he immediately refuses and goes to shut the door, but somehow chris convinces him with the reasoning of "less people means less chance someone tries to barge in."
— side note, you always get whichever seat you want and aux when matt's driving, it makes the other two go insane.
— mornings when you both don't have anything important to do or wake up a little earlier than usual, he wants to do two things.
— 1. wake and bake
— 2. morning sex.
— i mean seeing you first thing in the morning, getting high, and then fucking you dumb? thats his own personal heaven.
— it's doesn't take long for you to end up face down whimpering into a pillow while he drills into you from behind, senses heightened by the drug.
— he's struggling himself to keep quiet, opting to let out small grunts and whimpering into your ear, otherwise biting his lip to stay quiet.
— you fill all of his senses so well, your sounds sounding so heavenly to him, your walls squeezing him so well while he thrusts into your tight cunt.
— "doing so good for me mama, takin' me so well." he strains out as he gets close. you're both especially sensitive, highs coming all too soon.
so sorry if this is bad y'all 😭
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lovemomhatepolice · 5 months
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lando norris nswf alphabet (part 2!) (minors DNI!)
navigation taglist requests
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N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) There is no chance that Lando will ever in his life ask you for anal sex or agree to it. NO CHANCE. Ever since he first heard about it in his life, it has disgusted and disturbed him so much at the same time that he stands away.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.) Well, don't tell me Lando doesn't look like a munch. Totally do. Okay, he's also a big fan of you on your knees in front of him, until it takes his breath away as he looks at you all smeared with his cum with a wide smile and trained lips. But oh boy! Sam sometimes begs you to lie down in front of him and let him give you pleasure. The biggest plus is that Lando is well trained in this. Damn knows where he acquired such skills, but they are unearthly.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.) Fast, but not violent. It's already in Lando's nature to speed everything up, but it's not painful in the process. With the rest, slow sex is not for you. Well, I beg you, where would all the fun be? The whole process is a little slower when Lando finally pushes you to the wall and your relationship is not in any comfortable place, but he continues to try to keep his cool.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.) You love quickies. What more can be said here? You can't keep your hands off each other, so every possible opportunity to get even closer is even advisable. You definitely prefer it more, of course, when you have more time (and, most importantly, space), but when there is no such chance, quick fun together is fine for you.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.) Norris has it in him that he likes to take risks - he doesn't spare himself from hot kisses with you in public or even light pinches or pats on your buttocks. But if the matter comes down to sex, I don't think he's taking too many risks. Lando respects his privacy after all, so sexual matters remain between you. Possibly in front of the whole club when you come out of the restroom quite smudged and giggly. Or in front of his family, well. What goes in the family doesn't die, right?
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?) As much as you want. Really. Lando I think is pretty darn sturdy and can fly several rounds at a time, which is no surprise to you. More than once, with light breaks, you spent the whole night like that. Sometimes it would even start to dawn and you would be in each other's naked embrace, the hot temperature of the room and a mass of giggles.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?) No, he doesn't own any toys. He just doesn't have any - he's not a contrarian, he himself even bought his friend an inflatable doll for his birthday. In your relationship he would sooner use some on you, so 100%, if you own a vibrator, Lando will reach for it at some point and see how it works on you.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) Lando is so damn teasing! Once he will rub up against you, once he will "accidentally" touch you somewhere, once he will whisper such ungodly things to you, and then he will leave without a word. And during sex? I beg to differ. If only he has the strength to do so, he will interrupt until the last moment before your climax, just to hear your voice admonishing him in the midst of your moans.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.) Ay Lando is loud. In every possible aspect of his life, so in bed too. If he doesn't talk during sex, you definitely won't have it quietly anyway. Norris often giggles, and when he's not giggling, he's pretty darn vocal. Oj this boy is definitely not afraid to moan and show that he feels like heaven thanks to you.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character) He loves, well he so much loves to brand you. He gets the same way when you bestow a hickey on his neck. Raspberries on your breasts? That's the standard. In summer it's hard to hide the signs of love from Lando under dresses and short tops. But that's what he loves. He proudly shows off whether it's his neck or his chest.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes) Well I think above average. Although Lando is not some particularly tall and massive, that's what his advantage is. I'm telling you that there's something about his pants that you don't expect ;P
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?) God. Huge. As I mentioned before - you can't take your hands off each other. If you could, you would fuck each other every day. No matter what way - any way would be good. That's why yes, the sex drive Lando threw up when he first met you. And no matter what you do or what you're wearing! Remember
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) Ay, it depends on the moment. Anyone who knows Lando knows well that he happens to fall asleep in the least expected places and circumstances. This is also the case after your sex, but by the fact that there are a lot of emotions in between, he has to talk them out first, and only then can he go to sleep. After proper after care on your part and his, you both fall asleep in each other's embrace (Lando on your breasts)
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A/N: part one if you miss it, english is my second language i will be very pleased if you leave something behind - orders are open, and I am very close to 200 followers! maybe I can get in by the end of the week?
please do not copy and translate my works! in case of any issues related to this - I invite you to discuss privately :)
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jo-speaks · 4 months
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boat ride
in which...
Quinn takes fem! reader out for a ride on the lake.
warning: smut below! MDNI!!
note: second imagine for my 'alphabet dates' series! This one really isn't a "date", but it's okay. also, this is my first time writing smut so I would really appreciate some feedback bc I have no idea if it's good or not (i'm laughing but i'm not) wc: 2083
“Hey. Are you awake?”
You blinked your eyes open, turning to face Quinn, “I am now.” He let out a breathy laugh, “Sorry.”
Making a noise, you rolled over completely to wrap one of your legs over his waist. Your hand gently found its way to the nape of his neck, messing with the messy curls. Instinctively, he brought up his own hand to slightly lift up the big hoodie you were wearing, which was actually his, to rub the thigh of the leg that you had placed over top of him. 
“What time is it?” You mumbled. 
Quinn reached behind his head to grab his phone that was next to the bed, “2:45.”
Suddenly the lack of light in the room made a lot of sense. You and Quinn had been out on the lake the whole day and the second you had taken a shower after coming back in the house, you passed out in your shared bed. 
You tugged gently on Quinn’s curls, causing him to let out a groan. He leaned down to place a kiss on your lips.
It started off like every other kiss, slow, soft, and full of love. But, it slowly became more aggressive. You tried to pull away to take a breath, but Quinn didn’t let you. He trailed his hand up, going from your thigh to your ass. 
He gave it a gentle squeeze, causing you to let out a soft moan into the kiss. You didn’t pull away from the kiss, that had now turned into something far from sweet, as you shifted over Quinn, your legs on either side of his waist. 
You rolled your hips into Quinn, causing him to grip you tighter and buck his own hips up closer to you. 
Before it could go any further, you pushed his lips away from you. He tried to pull you back in, but you kept him away. 
“What are you doing? Are you okay?” He asked, sounding extremely out of breath. 
“Yeah, I just…” You took a deep breath, “We can’t do this here.” Quinn furrowed his eyebrows, “Why not? They’re all asleep.”
You shook your head, “I know. But how many times do your brothers wake up around this time to grab something or use the bathroom?”
Quinn took a second to think about your words, realizing you were right. He knew how you felt about people hearing the two of you during such an intimate moment, and he couldn’t help but feel the same way.
He’s the only one who could hear you that way.
After a minute or two, he lifted you off of him and grabbed his phone. Before you could question his actions, he spoke up. 
“Put your shoes on. We’re going somewhere.” He mumbled, getting up and walking out of the room. 
You took a moment, then immediately snapped into action. You slipped on a pair of Uggs and quietly got up to follow Quinn. Making your way downstairs, you could see your boyfriend standing out on the porch, keys in hand. 
Walking over, you slid open the glass door, causing Quinn to turn around. He closed the door quickly, grabbing your hand in his as he walked towards the deck. 
Obviously, it wasn’t busy at all. You could see some lights in the distance, coming from the country club, but the lake itself was pretty dark and quiet. Peaceful, even.
By the time you finished taking in the scenery, you could hear the engine of the boat turn on. Quinn grimaced at the loudness before extending his hand out towards you. You gladly accepted, stepping into the boat. You sat on the floor of the boat next to Quinn who was in the driver's seat.
The moment you were in, Quinn was driving off. The further away you got from the house, the more of your surrounding you were able to take in. Small waves were forming the more he sped up. You knew he wasn’t taking in anything, his mind only focused on one goal, but that didn’t stop you from speaking up. 
“It’s pretty out here.” You said, looking up at Quinn.
He didn’t answer, instead putting the boat in park. Looking down at you, he gave you a sweet smile before pulling you up to straddle his lap. Quinn took a minute, taking in your features as he rubbed his hands softly over your thighs. 
“How did I get so lucky?” He mumbled, leaning in to press his lips on yours.
Like before, there was something so sweet about the kiss. Your lips moved softly against his as you wished you could stay in this moment forever.
However, you both knew that wasn’t going to happen. At least not right now. 
As if it was muscle memory, you grind your hips into Quinn slowly, allowing a soft groan to escape his lips. He gave your sides a squeeze as he pressed you down harder, allowing you to feel him through his sweats. 
Knowing it was the only thing covering you, he left your hoodie on, not wanting to expose you to the chilly Michigan winds, yet his hands still found their way underneath it. You shivered as he grazed his hands over your breasts, the coldness of his fingers causing your nipples to peak.
Quinn continued his actions as he pulled away from your lips, trailing his kisses from your lips down to your neck. Your hands found their way to the back of his head, gripping tightly as he found that one spot that made you squirm. 
You let out a soft moan, “Quinn.”
“I know, baby.” He whispered.
He didn’t stop his attack on your neck as he pulled your panties to the side. The second his fingers came in contact with the wetness between your legs, he couldn’t help but smirk. “All this from a few kisses?”
You didn’t get the chance to respond as he spread your slick around, quickly finding the spot you needed his fingers the most. You let out a moan, louder than you intended to, as Quinn rubbed your clit. 
“Shit, Quinn.” You mumbled, biting your lip, trying to keep yourself from getting too loud. 
Unfortunately for you, Quinn wasn’t a fan of the silence. He moved his fingers faster, causing more noises to spill involuntarily past and your hips to grind against his hand. 
“Been so long. Let me hear you, sweet girl.” He whispered. 
At this point, Quinn didn’t care if you were cold or not. He lifted your hoodie up, exposing your bare chest to him. He let out a groan before he got closer, pressing sloppy kisses all over your breasts. 
It was slowly becoming too much. His fingers mixed with the feeling of his tongue running over your nipples was getting you closer and closer to your peak. 
The second your noises became louder and your back arched closer to his mouth, Quinn knew it was coming. 
Suddenly, the knot in your stomach snapped, a stream of obscenities past your lips as your legs shook and you gripped his hair tighter, the groan he let out only adding to the pleasure.
“There you go.” Quinn mumurred, keeping his movements going as he worked you through your high. 
You shifted away from his hand the second you came down, silently telling Quinn it was too much. He understood completely, pulling his hand away from your now sensitive pussy.
He placed a soft kiss on your lips, “You did so good, baby. You always do.”
His praise was something you would never get sick of, especially during moments like this. It let you know that he cared about you, not that you ever questioned it, but the constant reassurance made sure of that. 
Quinn wanted to give you a minute to rest, but you didn’t need it. Almost instantly, you lifted your hips, tugging at the waistband of his pants. He chuckled as you struggled to get them down due to his seated position.
After a few seconds of laughing at your struggles, he helped you out. He lifted his hips and pulled them down along with his navy boxers. 
You let out a soft gasp as his cock slapped against his stomach. He laughed softly at your reaction, knowing you’ve seen it a million times. Pulling you back towards him, he kissed you slowly. 
You were getting antsy, wanting nothing more than for him to be inside of you. You pulled away suddenly, causing a look of confusion to wash over his face. 
“What’s wrong?” 
“I need you, Quinny.” You admitted bashfully. 
A smirk appeared on his face, “Yeah? What do you need from me, pretty girl?” 
You were at a loss for words, the only thoughts forming in your head being lewd ones. When you didn’t answer, Quinn bucked his hips up, the tip of his cock nudging against your clit. The noise that escaped your mouth was one Quinn would never forget. 
“That.” You whispered, “I need you to fuck me, Quinn.” 
He smiled at your confession. Deciding not to make you wait any longer, he lined himself up before entering you with one swift thrust. The two of you let out matching moans at the action, neither one of you moving as you adjusted to feeling.
“I missed you.” Quinn panted, trying his best not to move until you did. 
You closed your eyes as you lifted your hips before dropping them again, causing a raspy moan to pass Quinn’s lips. “I missed you too.”
Opening your eyes, you got a good look at Quinn’s current state. You had only moved once, but his head was thrown back and his eyes were shut as he breathed heavily. You smiled at the sight, deciding to move your hips up again to see his reaction. 
The second you did, he couldn’t hold back anymore. He snapped his head up and began thrusting into you relentlessly. By the way he was feeling, Quinn wasn’t sure if he’d last. 
“Oh my god.” You cried out, trying to stay up straight. 
Quinn let out a strangled gasp, “You feel so good, Y/N. So-” He cut himself off with a loud groan as you clenched around him involuntarily.
Your head came down onto his shoulders as you wrapped your hands around his upper body to keep yourself grounded. Your nails dragged down his back, a cry of pleasure leaving your mouth as he hit that spot inside of you that made you see stars. 
He let out a guttural moan at the feeling, knowing the scratches would be red and visible in the morning. 
You rise and fall on his cock, harder and faster as you match his thrusts, his only response being a breathy grunt at the overwhelming feeling. 
“I’m close, Quinny.” You whimpered, trying your best to prolong your orgasm as much as you could in order to not end the moment.
But you could only do so much. 
Quinn brought one hand down from your waist to your clit, pressing down rather hard before rubbing it for the second time that night.
“Shit!” You called out.
You couldn’t keep up as he buried himself impossibly deeper into you. His actions were becoming more and more sloppy as he got close. And by the way his grip got tighter on your hip, you could tell he was right there with you.
You let out a breathy moan, “I’m gonna come.”
Quinn’s finger sped up, as did his hips, “Then come, baby. No one’s stopping you.”
It was those words that did it.
For the second time that night, you let go, allowing yourself to be in complete euphoria as Quinn continued moving, trying to extend your moment of pure bliss. 
The feeling of your muscles contracting around him caused Quinn to let go with you, his release spurting inside of you as he let out noise that could only be described as sinful. 
When you both came to, he placed loving kisses on your shoulder. “Did so good for me. So good.”
You made a noise, your body too exhausted to move from your current position. You both didn’t make any effort to move away from each other, trying to enjoy the closeness you had been starved of since the start of the offseason. 
“I love you.” Quinn whispered, “I love you more than you know.”
A sweet smile formed on your face, “I love you too.”
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sunboki · 2 months
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⎯ SUMMER SOLACE. a StrayKids fiction
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Stray Kids x implied! fem. reader (no poly)
TROPE. friends to lovers (not really lovers, more just strangers to friends), summerschool! au, reader is in student council as class prez
WORD COUNT. 12.6k words
PLAYLIST.
WARNINGS. cursing, very troubled childhoods, han lacks parental figures, minho’s mother passed, bullies, evidence of physical violence, mentions of depression & anxiety, just overall very angsty themes, healing, sadness, comfort comfort comfort — ALL OF THE ISSUES/TROUBLES OF CHARACTERS ARE 100% FICTION
AUG'S NOTES. i hope whatever you’re going through works out in the end, and that reading this very indulgent fic can help heal a part of you and get you through summertime sadness — inspiration for the fic came from this!
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SYNOPSIS. It was never your intention to be the one in charge of a summer school class—a troubled summer school class, but here you were. Eight boys in this classroom, all with their individual stories and silenced opinions. And somehow, you can’t find it in yourself to give up on them.
or alternatively :
Eight kids, one purpose. Get them to be okay with one another — with themselves — by the end of the summer.
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Eight kids, one purpose.
Get them to be okay with one another.
Although, you didn’t realize that yet. That your Class President position would throw you right into such a mess (or what you referred to it as the first time you got word).
We all have the things we hate. The things we say we “heavily dislike”. But in reality, we hate it. It incessantly grates our nerves, has our patience forming into a ticking pipe bomb, enough that sometimes, we explode. Say things we don’t mean, get angry, get mad. 
The thing that sets these boys apart, according to the acknowledgements paper you were given, is that they don’t even try to be sweet, they don’t ask for forgiveness. Not towards one another, and most certainly not towards anything else. 
Your job is just as you said. Get them to be okay with one another. 
Catch? There’s a time limit. 
Twelve weeks of summer school. 
Twelve weeks for eight boys to, no, not be nice to each other, not be best friends (not even friends), but just to be okay with being in the same room, be within six feet of each other without tearing someone’s throat — or their own — out.
Is it simple? Absolutely not. 
You want to try though, because up till now, everyone has given up on these boys. People that the school district have deemed always successful have pushed them aside, called them impossible. 
You won’t be the next to give up. 
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Twenty chairs in the classroom, yet not two sit next to each other, spaced out by at least three chairs per person. 
Your roster sits upon your desk, listing their names by alphabetical order. 
(Sitting on the furthest end of the classroom) Bahng, Christopher - nickname: Chan
He’s a football player (god knows how), who, despite hardly showing up to practices and arriving to random games—is always responsible for their wins. In some way you’re sure that’s the only reason he hasn’t been kicked off. 
Christopher’s an interesting case. 
He’s got amazing grades and passes school without fail, but no one has any clue about his home situation or whether he even has a home or not. You’re told he’s extremely distant and closed off, sort of void to life. He was sent due to excessive absences.
2. (Planted dead front of the class) Han, Jisung 
His record states he’s been sent to the counselor eleven times in the first two weeks of school for disruptions and inappropriate behavior. Jisung has an older brother who’s valedictorian, but they never speak to one another and don’t seem to have the best relationship. He’s said to be obnoxiously straight-forward and senseless, you wonder if it’s true.
3. (Nearest to the window on your right) Hwang, Hyunjin
Despite his popular facade, Hyunjin is regarded as the “troublesome face-card” by many deans and counselors alike. Students adore his looks, but he couldn’t butt heads more with Jisung, and they’re often sent out together. Hyunjin is believed to have a worrisome superiority complex according to the last counselor he’s been seen by.  
4. (Opposite of Hyunjin across the classroom) Kim, Seungmin
Not much has been recorded as far as Seungmin goes. He’s apparently a huge instigator in lots of illegal activity surrounding campus, but no one’s certain. His last counselor claimed he stayed silent throughout his consultation and answered suspiciously vague for almost every question. 
5. (A few seats behind Jisung) Lee, Felix
Both him and Christopher have been reported for vandalizing parts of the school in odd, incomprehensible words like “Miroh” and “Maze of Memories”. Some gossip that they’re secretly a part of an underground gang. But upon first glance, Felix looks harmle—
A hand raising grabs your attention. It’s Jisung, wearing a grin when you nod for him to speak. 
“How much for a tit-pic, Teach?”
Everyone is silent, and you hear Hyunjin stifle a snicker in the distance. 
So this is what they meant by inappropriate behavior.
The corner of your lips twitch slightly, but you successfully maintain an unnerved expression, instead, smiling back at him. 
“Let’s not ask questions like that, alright?”
Jisung amusedly huffs, still eyeing you incredulously. Although, he doesn’t say any more, and you continue down the roster’s descriptions.
Lee Minho whose info is conspicuously sparse , Seo Changbin who lashes out randomly without clear conscience (some claim he’s bipolar, you think different), and Yang Jeongin remain, bio’s dotted in unspecified theft attempts, assumed messy family situations and brief mentions of mental illness that seems to a follow a similar pattern to the rest. 
Stacking the papers upon your desk, you card eight sheets of notebook paper from the drawer, walking through rows of desks to pass each boy a slip. 
All eyes are on you now, and your breathing feels excessively loud in the stifling quietness. 
Lightly clapping your hands together in hopes of stirring some sort of sound in this stale air, you speak as fluidly and audibly as your voice will let you. 
“Today’s assignment is simple. I want you to write everything about yourself.”
Confused brows lift, primarily from Minho.
“Whether it’s what you like to do, what you don’t like to do, your favorite things, your favorite places, books, movies.”
Another hand raises. Changbin, you remember his name.
“Yes?”
“We’re not in fifth fuckin’ grade.” He growls, words booming. That was another complaint: Changbin’s explosively unprovoked opinions. 
Biting back the urge to snap back, you place both hands on the podium at the front of the class, essentially grounding yourself. 
“Yes, well this is—“ 
Somebody grumbles an incoherent sentence, and Changbin is immediately on his feet, chair squealing, eyes wild with fury. 
Second complaint: his flaming temper. 
Grabbing a fistful of Chan’s shirt (presumably the one who muttered), he sizes up the taller boy, spitting wild curses.
Inhaling deeply, you approach them, withholding the instinct to wince at Changbin’s yelling. 
“Changbin, please go back to your seat,” You usher, watching them never take their eyes off one another. Chan is eerily unmoved, though effortlessly intimidating nevertheless. 
The former spins around, shoving the other boy off to the side and resorting to sizing you up now, chin lifted, gaze belittling. 
One press and you’ll have assistance come in and help. You remind yourself, referring to the small red button residing in your pocket that sends a direct call to the other counselors. 
What good will that do? Your first step is getting them to be okay with you, not to mention each other.
No. You can do this, you’ll be fine. 
“Who the fuck are you to tell me what to do?” He spits, glaring as you back up the more he steps forward. That is till you stop and cause him to stop as well, leaving only a few centimeters separating your faces. 
“Because,” You ease, shoving a finger into the center of his chest sternly. “I’m your teacher now, and you’re stuck with me. So deal with it.” 
Tilting your head, you meet his eyes, hooded behind a veil of black hair. 
“I’m sure a fifth grader could understand that, right?”
And with that, you point to his seat and spin on your heel, taking a seat and watching the boys, one by one, lower their heads and begin writing. Well, excluding Changbin, who’s hands stick by his sides, staring at you. 
He chews his lip then turns around, shuffling back to his desk. 
By the time the dismissal bell echoes, you would like to say you see light in the distance, but the endless tunnel ahead tells you you’re far from even beginning.
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Glasses propped on the bridge of your nose, you sort through the papers, carefully observing each one.
It’s a Friday evening, meaning you’re given a meager two days to inhale as much information as possible for the approaching week. 
There’s a variety of answers on the papers, from some stating only a song they like or others more of a list-type structure. Felix apparently bakes in his free time and has two sisters while Jeongin plays piano. Although, a certain paper in particular stands out to you. 
Han’s.
Only his name is written, nothing else. You’re not sure if it’s a matter of his laziness or carelessness toward the assignment, but clear as day, dead center of his paper, is simply his name. 
You at least anticipated some kind of response, like an offensive joke or something, but no. Just: Han Jisung.
Interesting.
A sudden buzzing redirects your attention. It’s from Chaeryoung, cheerily asking about how the first day went along with spilling details about her own day as well. 
So far, things are going well. So far. 
Not permanent. Just like how you haven’t permanently tamed the beast named Changbin. 
And, although you hate such a mindset, realistically, it’s only a matter of time until something goes wrong. 
“Chae,” You echo, the faint rustling of your papers sounding on your side of the line. She hums.
“What do you think about this one.”
A grunt of acknowledgement is heard.
You sidle to another sheet; Han’s will have to wait for another occasion.
“Hwang Hyunjin. Said to be trouble-some, argues a lot, apparent superiority complex.”
Although your senior, Chaeryoung has always been a helping hand—a soul to rely on through the rocky periods, your rocky periods.  
“Hmm..” She considers, seeming to weigh the matter for a moment. “Have you seen his grades?”
Odd question.
“Straight A student according to his records.”
Impressive. Each quarter, top-scores. 
Well, it makes sense for the superiority portion in the case he uses his grades to hang over others heads, but the rest is strange, making it unusual for him to behave so brashly.
Or, maybe it wasn’t unusual, but overlooked.
As if reading your mind, she utters the same words you’d planned to.
“Anxiety?”
Said in unison, you both burst into laughter. Her blindingly bright laugh sends warmth throughout your stomach, easing the droning headache building between your temples. 
Hours you’ve spent glaring at the same papers, determined to locate something, anything as a way to help them. A problem to find a solution.
Yet, each case was different—personal to each boy in a sense you couldn’t assign an overall solution.
Instead, you pinpointed one case at a time. 
Starting with Hwang Hyunjin.
However, his wasn’t an easy fix. As a high school student, it was virtually impossible to “fix” anxiety (if that was even the issue at hand at all).
Everyone had it in their system. Upcoming tests, pressure. 
It was also impossible to really “fix” anybody generally, meaning, more or less, you had to find a way to help them want to help themselves.
With Hwang Hyunjin though, his, stated in the page’s description saying: Cares little to nothing about grades, wasn’t a testing anxiety of a sort, but maybe a tad bit deeper, barely visible without a sharper, clearer lense. 
“Send me a pic of the sheet, can you?” She begins, startling the hypothesizing from your mind. 
Again, an odd question, but you oblige, swiping off the calling tab to snap a quick picture. 
A long silence situates itself between you, presumably Chaeryoung investigating his information.
Strangely, you feel like a detective. Climbing skyscrapers to find a solution to a problem nobody addressed until it became horridly powerful—possessing, now fallen in your hands to solve. 
You refused to let their problems ruin them. And although becoming a illegitimate teacher wasn’t the plan for your senior year, you doubt you could back away at this point, not when you had already unearthed the treasure chest.
Last step was finding the key.
Well, detectives are equipped with a magnifying glass for a reason, right?
“… His drawings are pretty good?”
Then do you notice the doodles in the far corner of his introductory paper, a flower, a few butterflies, and a dog.. of a sort. Chihuahua-looking. 
“C’mon Chaeryoung, take this seriously,” Lightly scolding, you sigh, wetting your lips whilst flipping to the back of the page. 
It’s a quick script of things he enjoys, accounts from students he knows or that know him, overall containing an overview of his person. 
Hyunjin gets in lots of arguments with Han Jisung. 
You know that much. 
Your finger slips down the page, scouring each sentence.
XXXX: Hyunjin likes drawing. I’ve seen him drawing at his desk before. 
Baseless information, the doodles prove that—
Hold on. 
“Chae, when you’re anxious, do you have a reliever? Like doing something, listening to something?”
She chuckles, clattering of dishes in the background causing you to cringe slightly.
“Dancing, you know this. I’m not going to Hanlim Art School for nothing.” Teasingly voiced, you frown, deciding not to egg on her sarcasm.
“Then do you think, where it says he gets in arguments a lot, he’s projecting that anxiety when arguing because he doesn’t have a reliever?”
She clicks her tongue.
“Could be. But we don’t really know Hyunjin, yeah? It could be something deeper Y/nnie. You can’t look surface level when it comes to these guys.”
You sigh, rolling back your shoulders.
“You’re right, but I’m still gonna try it. I need to get through to him that I want to help him somehow, so I might as well exhaust all my options.”
You can’t look surface level when it comes to these guys. A phrase truthful to its fullest extent. 
“…Try what?”
Ah, you forgot to mention that part.
“Drawing. I’m gonna try convincing him to give it a chance.”
The stunned silence tells you she’s likely thinking you’re crazy, her only response a breath of disbelief.
You smile.
“I’m insane, I know.”
“No wonder we’re best friends.”
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Staring daggers at the papers in front of you, you prop your feet on the desk, sorting through option after option on what you plan next for class.
In the midst of learning more about each boy’s papers though, you overhear something, a few key words.
Friday. Fair.
Aha. 
The school’s annual summer fair, held as a congratulatory sort of event to celebrate moving onto a new year of school.
It’s decided. Friday, you’re taking them to the fair.
Mentally thanking whoever had brought it up outside the classroom, you’re quick in crumpling the additional papers, watching as one by one, the boys enter.
Hey, at least none of them are late.
…Not like they had a choice in that anyway.
And, through a rather painfully awkward second time teaching, the ice seems to be breaking little by little.
Any progress is good progress, you’ve deemed.
“Alright, before you’re dismissed, I wanna let you know we’re going to the fair Friday. Be there.” You hum, tapping the podium.
You swear there hasn’t been a more stifling pause in your life.
Though you’d been anticipating something adverse, this is a downright oddity.
“Uh.. what?” Han speaks up as you near the door. Morbidly quiet.
“All of you, meet me at the grounds at 7pm.”
Added into the deplorable silence, you glance over your shoulder whilst stepping into the hallway, face donning a mixture of curiosity and anticipation. “Okay, class dismissed.”
Beginning out the sliding door, the eruption of voices behind you cascade into a multitude of conversation, your clarification they had in fact heard and you weren’t discussing plans with a brick wall.
All you can do is hope they show up.
Class continues through the week, trying to get them to grow more comfortable with the atmosphere—their classmates, more specifically.
Of course, you earn your fair share of close calls and near incidents in those four days leading to Friday, but seeing the whole group turn up that fateful evening seems to make the ordeal worthwhile.
Quick to move your separate ways, you’re hasty in tagging along with Hyunjin, the boy unusually quiet as you fall into step to his right.
“So.. you draw?” You start, scorning the nervousness evident in your tone.
Surprisingly, he doesn’t interject, nor bite back something as his infograph had led you to believe.
“Yeah,” He sharply replies, eyes trained ahead, taking swift, motivated steps through heavily trodden grass.
It confuses you, in all honesty. Everything about this so-called ‘superiority complex’. From these few days you’ve seen him or interacted (though fleeting), not once has the man exhibited any form of arrogance nor shed of his assumed traits.
He’s shy, actually. Maybe you’re simply gracing surface level like Chaeryoung advised, but certain aspects could be seen in the black of night.
“Y’know, you’re pretty good.”
Despite his lack of response, you can feel his eyes dance to your face for a split second. 
“‘Think you should try it. You’ve got potential, just saying,” You shrug, merely talking without reason nor inhibition.
“You think?”
It’s his voice breaking through your barrier of unrequited cordiality that stirs the air. A final, conversational pair of words after watching him play countless fairground games in quietness.
“I do,” You hum, nodding avidly while watching Hyunjin’s eyes flicker down to the ground below before back to yours, holding eye-contact.
In those moments, you decipher two things.
Hyunjin rivals the prettiest of paintings, and whatever earlier assumptions had been stuck to his tanned skin couldn’t be more wrong. 
“Yo! If you’re just gonna stand there, move it!”
Changbin’s interjection successfully scares the living soul out of you and simultaneously wrecks your intense staring session.
Nevertheless, it’s hard even for you to explain how you ended up competing against the boisterous boy in ball toss, only that you find yourself wanting to tattoo the sight of Hyunjin laughing and Changbin shouting with defeat beneath your eyelids forever.
Granted a gift upon winning, you snag a snorlax plush amongst the scattered options hanging at the top of the booth, presenting it to the him with a smile.
“Huh?” Changbin grunts, head tilted, gazing at you as if you’ve spawned two heads.
“Take it, ‘s for you,” You urge, surveying the boy’s tentative touch against the plush’s soft fur with evident glee.
Still pouty, yes, but you take the sight of the stuffie held in his arms while the three of you walk back as a victory. 
After a quick stop by a corn dog stand, you lean against the food truck’s side, wordless as Changbin and Hyunjin head off their own ways — the only trace of familiarity near you being someone clearing their throat.
Off to the side stands Chan, quietly sparing you not-so-sneaky glances, his hands stuffed in his black jogger’s pockets. 
You cock your brows, head tipped as if silently asking: “What?”
“Waiting for you,” Is his reply, and it catches you off guard at the consideration in those syllables. 
Not that you envisioned Chan as someone cold, but you certainly weren’t expecting him to wait for you while you ate.
Granting the boy a tiny smile of gratitude, you find yourself unconsciously gravitating his way, stuck in an orbital pattern of continuous voyage, indifferent to moving away.
“Chris is an interesting name,” You offer, aimlessly walking past endless booths, people.
“From Australia,” He speaks. Short and straight to the point, yet lacking any hostility. 
“Yeah? Why’d you move?” 
Ushering him on carefully, you manage to tiptoe a bit into foreign territory, navigating rows of traps and ambushes ahead.
“There’s nothing for me back there apart from my family.” His shoes, caked in mud, shuffle to a halt, gaze trained upward toward the constantly reeling Ferris Wheel.
Almost instantly, you can sense a shift in demeanor. It nearly makes your hair stand up on end, specifically upon seeing the hint of vulnerability shed across his face.
Maybe you’re seeing things.
“I’m just.. here. Like I work so hard for a something I’ll never have.”
His nose scrunches, beautifully glossy brown irises reflecting the blinking lights. Red, blue, green, yellow, all encompassed in those eyes.
No, this is all real.
The sight steels you a bit.
After a moment, you nudge his shoulder, his head finally turning to look at you. 
“I don’t think I’m really the greatest to talk to when it comes to this but, Chan, you have to live without a purpose.”
You inhale deeply.
“Because if you keep trying to find a reason for everything-“
The shouting of an oh-so skillful interruption known as Changbin calling your name in the distance temporarily cuts you off.
“You’ll never be satisfied with a reality that won’t change unless you do, with this life.” 
For Chan, no place like home only applied when he had a place to call home. As for now, he was a wanderer. 
That, or inches from deluding himself into a comfortable, insufficient reality instead.
Making believe until something becomes real.
“Do you think it’ll be okay?”
His words catch you off guard, and you sort of stare for a moment, holding his gaze as if looking away means your demise.
For a second, you wonder if every boy’s eyes are this captivating.
Hyunjin, now Chan.
“I do,” You whisper, voice hardly audible amidst the bustling fairground.
His lips quirking into a smile serve as your indication he heard, and he reaches a hand up to gently sweep a strand of hair from your face behind your ear.
Again, unexpected, not disliked.
“Live on, yeah?” Chan hums, lifting his pinky for you to take with a mirrored grin, emotion buried within his dark chocolate pools for eyes you fear to unearth.
Maybe that’s something irrevocably agreed upon.
Live on.
It seems so, even when you regroup with an avidly boastful Changbin barking over who won at a rifle booth against him and Han. Agreed in the pinkies still intertwined behind your backs, in the shared smiles he gives you here and there as the night continues.
“Say, what is it with the both of you?”
Sidled between Han and Hyunjin on the walk back to campus, you find the question slipping from your lips before thinking.
Hyunjin grunts, and Han shrugs.
Children, you swear.
“Constantly biting at each other’s throats, yeah?” You huff, arms crossing.
Glancing over at Hyunjin after neither boy decides to respond, you raise a brow.
“As your teacher, I’m gonna assign something,” You begin, glaring at the tiny scoff Han resounds when you try using an authoritative tone.
“Next time you see each other, try to be nice.”
Another silence.
“I’m dead serious.”
“Y/N-“ Han starts, quickly silenced by your lifted hand.
“No buts. Do it, got it?” Firmly commanding, you leave no room for argument, the two responding as if it were the worst of punishments, wallowing in self pity.
Despite an onslaught of beginnings and continuations to newly opened books, you think the chapter where Hyunjin and Han sulk all the way back to campus takes the cake.
For now it does.
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“I want someone to play me,” Han says, bringing the popsicle up to his lips. 
The sun beats onto their skin, warm rays causing a scrunch to appear between his brows.
In an attempt at following your “get-along” suggestion, the two found themselves coincidentally running into each other at the nearby Supermarket after school, sparing cautious glances back and forth till someone broke the silence.
Like fate, drawn together in the ugliest of ways.
Han went first, a hesitant “hey” somehow leading to the two hunkering down on bamboo flooring with a conversation in tow. 
It’s a start.
“Play you?” Hyunjin parrots, confused.
“Yeah,” He responds, fiddling with the name tag attached to his uniform. “They say nobody knows you better than yourself, but I dunno.. I feel like I don’t know anything about me. I’m an alien to myself.” 
Jisung bunches up the wrapper, the crinkling sound rivaling screeching cicadas clinging to the trees overhead.
“I bet if I had an actor play me, I’d make a lot more sense.”
Somehow, out of all the things Han Jisung has said to him, this is the one thing Hyunjin can fully understand. 
Understand that, despite living with yourself all your life, you’re still a novice even in your own body, in need of someone to tell you about yourself, an opposing point of view to help round out the sharp corners.
That’s it. The word to describe it, how Hyunjin found himself bound to art.
Your words replay in his mind on loop.
“Think you should try it. You’ve got potential.”
Understanding.
Art, in its most frustrating, brutally painful form, allows Hyunjin to understand. Himself, his wishes, life, despair. It’s his actor. An ideal perspective responsible for clearing his conscious, a contact lense to the eyes he hadn’t realized were blurry, half-open.
“What did you write on that paper about yourself?” Hyunjin ventured, beaming sunlight cast upon long fingers that peer from the balcony’s shade, highlighting cool toned veins in an almost transparent ray.
Coins cash into the vending machine, the dull cry of birds soaring to the sky in a flurry of wings echoing in his eardrums.
“The one Y/N handed out?”
Hyunjin hums.
“My name.”
The latter’s lips quirk into a clumsy smile. 
Han Jisung, that’s all he wrote. How original of him.
Hyunjin watches an ant crawl atop a leaf, simultaneously swiping a droplet of water from the popsicle’s wrapper with his thumb. 
He tests his words.
“I want,”
A pause. 
“To add art now. To the paper, as my friend.”
Jisung purses his lips curiously, brows lifted.
However, he doesn’t pester.
“Art is your friend?”
Meeting the other boys gaze, Hyunjin finds himself, for the first time when looking at Han Jisung, smiling.
“Yeah, it is.”
. . .
“Heh. What a weirdo— YAH!”
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Next Wednesday’s evening consists of a plethora of instances, some more notable to mention than others.
One, getting slammed to a wall by Changbin, and two, getting screamed at right after.
Though you weren’t aware of that yet, not when you looked up from your phone after school to see the boy storming toward you, and certainly not when you smiled, an action seeming to have provoked his hand to your collar, cornered against a wall without so much as a greeting.
“Changbin..?” You manage, slightly breathless at the impact, brows furrowed.
And instantly, listening to the words he spews, it feels as if all the progress you’d made at class—nevertheless the fair—dissolved into nothing.
Back to square one.
“Who do you think you are?” He spits, looking you up and down with a wrinkled nose. “What? You think you own the world ‘cause you’re doing something good? Helping ‘troubled’ kids?” 
Before you can interject, his grip tightens on your shirt, shaking you angrily before stopping again, darks eyes burning with nothing but rage.
“We aren’t your confidence boost, Teach, so get out of your stupid headspace. We don’t need your help and never asked for it in the first place, so get lost.”
Changbin dips dangerously close to your face, venom dripping in his tone.
“Got it?”
Using as much force as you can muster, you ram your palm against his chest, effectively pushing him off of you before slamming against his shoulder and walking away.
Halfway down the street do you stop, not daring to look back at him.
“I don’t know what makes you think I’m doing this for a confidence boost, and I’m not going to try understanding. But that gives you no right to pick me apart like you know me!” You shout, continuing to head as far as you can from him, glaring ahead.
It’s fair he got that idea. Some random student infiltrating your summer all for the sake of what? Their future? Yours? What was this for anyway? Your position as Class President using this “summer school” to make you feel better about yourself, add more to a resume? 
Plopping down at a bus stop a mile or so later, you pull your legs to your chest, rehearsing just what drove you into the mess anyway. 
You want to help them. That’s it. 
Repeating the phrase like a sacred oath, it isn’t until the burning sun’s waning scorch that you’re reminded of evening’s approach, begrudgingly lifting yourself off the now-sweaty seat.
Unbeknownst to you, Chan stood as a witness, watching either of you quarrel prior to parting, you disappearing elsewhere while Changbin remained in place, burning holes into the ground with a furious glower.
Hurriedly assessing what his first move should be (or if he should even move at all), he decides upon following you when the dark-haired boy stalks off.
“Y/n!” 
The oddly familiar voice graces your senses when you look up, pausing just outside the bus stop, earbuds dangling from your pocket. 
It’s Chan, still wearing his school uniform. 
“Oh, hey Chan.” Slapping a hopefully convincing smile on, you allow him to occupy the space to your left as you head home, entertaining his occasional questions, sentences.
You’re glad it’s Chan though. 
“Um, Chan?” You pique upon reaching your door, looking back at him, question inches from slipping off your tongue.
Has anything happened with Changbin lately?
“Yes?”
No, you can’t. 
“Never mind, um, bye!” Brushing off the thought, you give him another tight smile, waving the boy off and slipping into your home with a loud sigh.
Outside, Chan tugs his lip between his teeth, watching you debate on your words. He knows what you wanted to ask, what so obviously sat heavy on your shoulders the entire way home. 
Perhaps it’s his perception that’s gotten him this far. 
Stuffing his hands into his pockets, he decides the next course of action would be locating the other half of this division. 
Unfortunately for him, Chan has no idea where he could be. The likelihood he’s home is minuscule if his hunch is right, and so, the man wracks his head for any clues.
Abruptly, a past conversation hits him.
“Have you been there? The old train station below the tunnel?”
Chan, lips pursed as he tries recalling, shakes his head.
“I like that place, ‘helps me think.”
That’s it.
Racing off despite the darkness creeping across star-splattered sky, his legs carry him as fast as possible. 
Dipping below the bridge, his skin prickles at the cold air. Minimal lighting apart from a few white beams paves a clear path to his desired individual, planted in the dead center of the platform.
“Binnie,” Chan calls. 
Only he can get away with calling Changbin “Binnie”, a nickname grown into second nature as the two grew more accustomed these past two weeks.
The boy doesn’t budge, doesn’t reply. He stands there, chin down, hands firmly bunching his pants in a tight hold.
Yet, when he looks up after a lengthy pause, Chan watches his lip quiver, watches his shoulders shake senselessly as he gradually reaches his outstretched arms.
“I.. I keep hurting so many people and.. and…it’s so lonely, why is it so lonely?” 
Without an utterance, he pushes Changbin’s head against his shoulder. 
And they hug. They hug for a long, long time. Basking there, healing there. 
Changbin cries. 
There’s a lot to cry about, a lot of things he’s needed to cry about, things he couldn’t cry about before. But he does. Tonight, in this empty train station, Changbin cries in Chan’s arms, his friends arms.
Changbin’s first friend—who smoothes messy curls down in delicate strokes, holding him dearly close. 
Chan isn’t oblivious, because in those particularly tender moments, one in specific taking place right after the fair, Changbin speaks words Chan had never heard before. 
Problems. They told each other it all. Their secrets, struggles. 
Changbin’s issues with his parents, Chan’s with his home-situation, his internal displacement.
“I know things are hard right now, but we’re going to get someplace better together, okay? We’re brothers.” Chan whispers, and his friend sniffles, nodding wordlessly.
Brothers. 
Changbin is his brother now, and no blood needs to prove that. Because in times you don’t have that family, that connection, you make it yourself.
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Seungmin: Y/n, can you meet me at Gokseong Hill?
You groan picking up your phone, granted a mere thirty minutes of peace after your painful run-in with Changbin and an equally painful attempt at a conversation with Chan before your phone lights up.
Y/n: Do you plan to murder me or something?
Seungmin: I’m not as creative as Jisung, so no
You crack a smile.
Y/n: I’ll be there
Fastening a jacket over your shoulders, you lock the door behind yourself, stuffing jingling keys into your pocket.
Hey, a bit of fresh air sounds tempting.
At the peak of the hill he sits, and it’s not until you follow his upward stare that you take in the stars overhead. 
The slight altitude paves way to a more than incredible view. Countless galaxies right above your head, twinkling so brightly in the sky. Far from streetlights, from civilization. 
Your staggered breathing hiking up here proves worthwhile now.
Wordlessly plopping down beside him, you lay back, admiring.
“Do you ever wanna scream?” Seungmin reaches his hand to the sky, allowing the dark blue and black hues to waltz in his grasp.
The twinkling wonder dappled above prohibit a full view of his facial expressions, but you have an idea of how wistfully he gazes into that atmospheric abyss. Aching.
You humorlessly chuckle.
Do I ever.
“When I first met Changbin, I wanted to scream every twenty seconds.”
Seungmin laughs. Pretty.
“Guys like that do that to you.”
He curls his fingers into a fist, arm remaining outstretched. 
“Do it.”
“Hm?”
“Scream.”
He looks at you like you’re insane for a moment, then pauses, fingernails digging into the earthy soul beneath you before he screams.
Screams, louder and louder, so loud you’re surprised his lungs haven’t given up yet, surprised you haven’t laughed at how comical the entire thing is. His body practically lifts off the ground, eyes screwed shut.
Then he stops, catching his breath. 
No comments nor laughter. Quiet. 
Reaching out, you give his hand, dirty fingernails and all, an assuring squeeze.
I don’t know, but I care.
A silent utterance.
“Better?”
He nods. 
You’re next, and this time, you’re first to laugh.
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As the two week mark of class is pinned, you want to give yourself a pat on the back for managing - no less surviving till now.
So, it really makes you wonder how you ended up in such a predicament.
Han Jisung, someone you never anticipated to be beside you on your Saturday, resides in the drivers seat of your parent’s car, hands sweating up nothing short of an ocean without even starting the vehicle.
Well, you are aware of how this all began, but then again, your pride wants to be salvaged, if barely.
A bit of pleading on Han’s side about his parents nagging him and a pinch of your groggy mumbling at 9am to end up here, to be exact.
“Look… About what I said the first day.. I’m really sorry about that. I shouldn’t have asked that, it was rude and- ow!”
A hard flick delivered to the boy’s forehead has his face wrinkling up, an offended expression worn on chubby cheeks.
“Yes, it was rude, and I’ll ostracize you if you ever do it again. But I forgive you, you’re welcome,” You state, arms crossed.
Han’s sheepish nod seems to be the best reply you’ll get. 
“Alright, now, shift the gear to drive.”
“…That’s ‘D’, right…?”
“You’re kidding.”
No, he wasn’t kidding, and a lesson that could’ve been an hour long turns into two and a half hours in no time.
Finally, by some miracle, you end up on the road, holding on the seat like a vice, the boy mirroring your panic with nervous jittering and random comments.
“Oh wait! Isn’t the Film Festival coming up-“
“FOCUS ON THE ROAD!”
Ah, he has the attention span of a squirrel, that too.
And if you aren’t doused in gray hairs after that you’d be surprised, Han looking just as frazzled, exiting the car with wobbly legs and wide, frazzled eyes. 
From then on out, you decide teaching the boy how to drive would have to wait.
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With July days away (a miracle, you’d like to say), you bury your nose into new assignments and exercises for the class, desperately gripping onto the bits and pieces of progress you’re making.
It’s meager, and certainly not sturdy, but you’ll take what you can get. 
..Even if those hard silences are crippling.
A knock ushers you away from the barstool you perch on, cautiously peering from your front door’s tiny peephole. 
Felix.
Upon opening in the door, you first notice his raw cheeks, eyes puffy and red.
He’d been crying, unmistakably.
You don’t move away when he walks forward and presses his face against your shoulder.
“Can I stay here? I don’t want to go home tonight.” The boy whispers, and you reach a tentative hand to pat his head. 
“Of course.”
Clambering the teary boy inside, you spend a decent ten minutes helping him catch his breath and calm down a bit, not wanting to stress the poor thing out with questions.
Standing in your foyer, it’s his shaky voice piercing the air responsible for your head snapping up.
“Do you.. have brownie mix?” 
.
.
.
“He was always the fearless kid,” Felix mutters, occupying himself with folding the batter in a bowl. 
Interestingly enough, Felix is a stress baker, something of which you hadn’t realized until getting schooled on the correct ingredients to use for brownies.
The topic is Minho. Or, what Felix knew of him.
“I could never read him. I still can’t. I remember he saved this cat once and it bit him. I cried the whole way to the doctor’s office and he was the one who calmed me down instead.” 
All you can do is laugh in reply, the blond sheepishly grinning.
Licking off some brownie mix, he hands you the other whisk where you lean against the counter. 
Leaning forward to smear some of the sugary goodness on his cheek with a giggle, you adore the way his eyes light up, causing his freckles to almost glow.
If past-lives were real, you think Felix would’ve been a fairy.
“You knew Minho when you were younger?”
Felix nods.
“We met in seventh grade. Our mom’s were friends through work. Although, I don’t think he liked me very much.”
He shakes the bubbles from the cooking sheet, ensuring the edges of the pan were even. You slip past him to pre-heat the oven. 
There’s a soft chuckle on his end, and it’s not until you turn around do you see the pikachu mitten he’s quite literally critiquing with his eyeballs.
Such expressive eyes, though they’re different than Minho and Seungmin. 
While Minho has something like the atlantic ocean hidden deep behind those pupils, Seungmin is more of an open field.
Though Felix, he has stars.
So many stars, in fact, that they couldn’t possibly all fit, spreading to his face instead. Down his arms, his chest. Till all of a sudden the entire galaxy found its home in the boy standing in front of you.
“Hey, no judging,” You grin, scrutinizing his innocent shrug. 
Snatching your precious oven-mit from his fingertips to load the pan in yourself, a gasp stirs when a pair of arms winds around your middle, his chin resting upon your shoulder as you close the door and set your timer.
“Thank you.”
“Hm? What for?” Stopping your movements, you allow the boy to snuggle closer.
“For reminding me of myself. I seem to get lost in other people sometimes and forget I’m here too.” At the last part of his sentence he laughs, rocking back and forth on his heels and causing you to rock with him. 
Ten minutes or so you rock. Easy, comfortable. 
Felix gives nice hugs. His clothes are sprinkled with a strange mixture of both brownies and chocolate chip remnants he’d snuck in without your knowledge.
Comfortable.
He’s a kid who never really got the chance to grow up. The one who was constantly told he’s so mature for his age, a phrase that eventually melded so far into his brain it became second nature, gum stuck to his shoe. 
Because the kid that was so mature for his age was never asked if he needed help or if he was okay, everyone simply assumed. Even when the world came crashing down, Felix was fine. Just fine. 
Until he wasn’t, and suddenly, Felix came crashing down with the world.
“..Do you like face-masks?”
You may not be able to fix his crumbling world, but you could give him some good memories to remember it by.
Which is how you found yourself roped in your bathroom, carefully applying the charcoal face mask onto his perfect skin, unblemished and definitely not deserving of the treatment. But, like you said, memories. 
You should be off to bed, already prepping for the next morning, school. June 17th, officially seventeen days into summer school. Yet here you are, greedily shoving down brownies with a new companion, Lee Felix, on the couch while looking like utter idiots in face masks. 
After seven episodes of Gilmore Girls does he wearily rise up, beckoning you with him to wash off your skincare madness only to make an equally weary trip straight back to the living room.
“Do you think Minho likes me?” Your baking partner whispers, his head resting upon your lap. Those unfairly long lashes begin to dust closed, the subtle flash of light emitted from your scented candle sending a golden gleam across the room.  
“Mm.. I’m sure he does. I’m sure he likes you very much,” You assure, not needing a response from his fallen-asleep form, not expecting one anyway. 
What occurred in the first place nor why he asked such questions wasn’t your business, but somewhere, a part of a you wanted to know. The cause of his pain, of all of their pain. 
Hardest part of your evening was definitely attempting to slip him off your lap, luckily a success after four or five minutes. 
Carefully propping a pillow behind his head and layering a blanket across his jacket-clad body, you sneakily turn off the TV, bidding the exhausted boy a hushed “good night” and placing a gentle peck to his forehead before turning off the porch light.
Laying in bed whilst your eyes resist closing, you find yourself hoping he’ll sleep well, hope this night is something he can look back on with a smile on his face.
Felix deserves that.
That morning, upon forgetting your alarm, either of you are scrambling from bed or, in Felix’s case, flopping from your couch with a loud thud!
“Minho lives pretty close,” Felix winds the straps of his backpack over his shoulders, glancing from side to side while observing the area. You follow suit, both clambering to rush out the door, jogging down the street hurriedly.
Seems the Minho kick is still here then, huh.
“But he might not be at school off and on because of his Grandma.”
The awaiting tip of your head calls for an explanation, and a light bulb seemed to bloom above him — obviously having realized something.
Either of you pause at a crosswalk.
“Didn’t I tell you?”
You shake your head, brows pinched. 
Felix pokes his tongue into his cheek.
“Well, Minho’s mom died a bit back. He takes care of his Grandma now. After she passed he got really distant and we…” His tone dissolves, and you don’t interrupt, allowing the boy to speak his mind. “Haven’t talked since.”
Apparently, there’s a corner to this billion-piece jigsaw.
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One, horrifically fateful paper lay taped down onto one desk far too many boys are trying to look at.
Levanter High Film Festival. Participants will make a 25 minute short film with cinematography and soundtrack themes made entirely by themselves.
“..And you want us to do this?” Jeongin mutters, skeptically scratching the bottom of his chin. 
“Yep! We are!” You proudly announce, given quite a few confused glances in return.  
As Jisung had taken the time to so kindly mention while nearly crashing the car, July, the month in which you’ve somehow made it to with this group, means the arrival of creative festivals — or, the school boards way of enhancing student participation.
“Uh.. I’ve gotta DAW at home..?” Chan speaks up, brows furrowed thoughtfully.
“…A dawg?” Han snorts, Felix smacking his back in an attempt to quell his own laughter.
“A music birth giving machine,” Changbin offers.
“Ew, weird way to put it.”
“Shut it, Jisung.”
“Alright. Now, we’re gonna break off into departments, okay? We need director, maybe script writers? An idea of where we’re gonna film, song producers, and someone with a camera.” Murmuring with your lip tugging between your teeth, you tap your foot, the group cumulating into frenzied discourse, seemingly arranging themselves. 
And, almost as fast as you blink, you’re pleasantly surprised to find no blood had been shed over positions.
Accordingly — with obvious inclusion in every position at some point — Chan, Changbin, and Han are working music, Seungmin is working on the script, Jeongin and Hyunjin are doubling as directors and camera-providing members, and Felix and Minho have been elected as the main characters. 
You can’t help but find it rather interesting considering your prior knowledge of the situation. Their situation.
Felix’s longing, Minho’s loss.
The imperfect, perfect pair.
“What’s the name gonna be?” Jeongin piques, the eight of you squinting at his frame leant against the windowsill.
The boy hesitates. 
“Like, our label?”
Equally confused stares. 
In honorary mention of the esteemed ‘Film Festival’ introduced this summer, you decided, along with Han’s incredibly distracting tendencies, that you guys would be participating.
Then again, everyone is still getting used to being within six feet of each other, so being stuck in the old photography club room on a school night remains effortlessly uncomfortable.
And with the slow eye contact each of you exchange, a gradual cacophony of “Ohhh”’s. 
“How about Boy’s Generation!” Jisung jumps in, earning a smack across the head from Hyunjin followed by loud whining whilst burying his head in Minho’s chest (of whom looks unbearably awkward) who tries to console.
Emphasis on the “tries” part.
“Maybe.. Lost Men?” Changbin suggests, quiet hums of agreement sounding from the remainder. 
You choke back a laugh, which, doesn’t turn out to be as choked as you’d prefer by the glare you get in response.
“Lost Men? Are we sailors?” Stammering down your giggles the best you could manage, Seungmin clears his throat, attention quickly directing his way.
Seungmin has a habit, if that’s what you want to call it. He’s never outspoken, no, but he speaks, a lot. Minho is the same in that sense. Whether quiet mumbling or the illustrious expressions he makes, you’re confident the both of them could maintain a perfectly understandable conversation using just their eyes. 
Sort of scary. 
“Stray Kids?”
Five seconds later and Felix grumbles, interrupting everyone’s inner contemplation.
“Kind of fitting if you think about it.”
Minho grunts, voicing a question that extinguished the conversation beforehand. 
“Well what happens when we aren’t astray anymore?”
And, although the foreboding tension sat heavy in the air, it was easy to tell he held no weight to his words.
Because regardless of what kind of conclusion they reached at some point, it was irrevocably known they’d always be stray. Searching, looking for something they weren’t sure existed.
No reply came. No one complained. 
Chan typed up the label in the lower left corner of the doc, the laptop he’d taken from his bag propped on his lap.
You gave Minho a half-smile he sheepishly returned.
The more you thought about it, the more it matched. Not only searching, but paving. One way or another, the assumed nobodies were growing, developing into something unforgettable, if only to a few people. 
You had no doubt more would remember their names in the future, but as for now, you stay as Chan, Minho, Changbin, Han, Felix, Seungmin, Jeongin, and Y/n, lodged in the school’s vacant club room, arranging ideas for the Film Festival. 
Stray Kids. 
You liked it. 
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The quiet rolling of his bike gears sits between you, familiarly nostalgic chirping of crickets heightening the darker the sky becomes, dusk plowing a runway through orange clouds.
Headed back from school, you happened to run into Minho, jogging to catch up with him in the midst of his departure.
“I like my life.”
Mid-chew on a sour gummy worm, you cease your gluttonous rampage in order to catch Minho’s hushed breath.
“Being alive is nice.”
And when he says that, he turns his head toward you, expression piquing a “don’t you think so?” type of question you struggle to answer.
Zoning in on the repetitive motion of his wheel, you wrack your brain. 
“Yeah? It’s hard, but I would say it’s worth it.”
His brows raise, a barely visible, lopsided smile winding itself around his lips — chapped but still such a captivating pink hue.
All he has to do is hum, doing that habitual blinking thing he always does to know he agrees.
Minho is the small things, you configure.
He’s fixing the bulletin when a paper fell off and picking up Changbin’s Snorlax plushie when he almost forgets it. He’s reminding you to text him when you get home “just because”. He’s the little things nobodies notices, little things that show he cares. 
Lee Minho is the small things, but he’s also so much too — so many stories, people, places. He’s heartbroken but he tries, pained but still swimming in a whirlpool of an ocean that flushes him from its tides.
Perhaps somebody could be his buoy, somebody who’d keep him afloat.
You have a hunch as to who that person might be.
Bike squealing to a stop, you clamber to catch pace, backing up a bit to notice what Minho points at. 
A field.
“This would be a good place to film if it weren’t off limits.” He observes, either of you acknowledging the “No Trespassing” sign latched loosely onto a chain link fence. 
Biting your lip, a small smirk finds itself upon your face. 
“It’s not off limits if we can get in, right?” 
Minho gives you an uncertain stare, quickly tampering into downright exasperation.
“Aren’t you supposed to be a good influence?”
You laugh at this, laying your bike down to hitch each hand into diamond-shaped openings and climb, sending your suspicious audience an expectant look.
“I’m meant to be a good learning experience, think of this as part of a the process. Now c’mon, climb. Let’s see what we’re working with.”
Half-heartedly, you’re joined in your risky pursuit, scaling up to the top before thumping down on the other side. 
Minho, on the other hand, is a tad bit more skeptical, remaining at the fence’s peak, glaring down nervously.
Although, with lots of patience and encouragement, the anxious boy takes a leap of faith onto uncut grasses and stalking weeds. 
Halfway into your adventure do clouds begin festering, setting the atmosphere in a gray haze the longer you brainstorm filming spots, whether that’s pointing out certain locations or deciding on specific scene placement.
“We could have Felix here, then I run in and find him?” 
“Okay— what if we make it like a huge confrontation. You run in, confront him-“
Jutting of metal against another surface redirects your mid-sentence focus, gaze averting toward the sound. 
Shit. Security.
“Hey you! What do you think you’re doing!?” 
Momentary silence and either of you go bolting as fast as your legs will go.
“Quick!” You shriek, the sky dotted in strikes of lightning, alighting into a sudden electrified cauldron of clouds and rain.
Minho is right on your heels, jackets strung over your heads in a feeble attempt to divert some watery droplets from their rapid descent.
Not only the useless fear of getting soaked, but the lingering outline of an approaching flashlight in the distance and the thumping of footsteps from behind urge you onward, scaling the looming fence using slippery fingers and wild adrenaline.
Except, just as you edge over the top of the fence does your shirt get caught in the twisted wire, effectively preventing your movement (much to your panic) while Minho shouts below. 
Luckily, in the nick of time do you manage to free yourself, having to lurch forward and simultaneously earn a stinging cut before racing to your bikes and speeding off.
Learning experience was certainly a word for it. 
“So..” You start, lingering by Chan’s doorway. 
According to a fretful, rain drenched Minho speaking to your equally drenched self, his place was the closest.
“What’s our excuse?” You mumble, Minho scoffing before shrugging off his jacket to hand to you, earning a curious tip of your head.
Wordlessly does he point to your now dampened white shirt, and you can’t help but smile at the realization.
Hm. What a gentleman.
Easing the fabric over your soaked shirt, you just finish buttoning to the bottom when Chan opens the door, cocking a brow.
“Who knew it actually rained cats and dogs?”
“You’re not funny.”
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Stepping inside, you’re greeted with the chilling temperature, skin erupting into goosebumps as either of you awkwardly stand in the doorway, Chan disappearing into the other room only to return with two t-shirts.
“Bathrooms are on either side of the hall, you’ll find them,” He hums, and you give him a grateful smile before padding off to change, the sound of your squeaking steps making you cringe.
Chan’s old swim-team tee hangs loosely from your body upon stepping out, plopping down onto his couch with an exaggerated groan.
Behind you, Minho sits on an unoccupied chair, taking sips of water here and there.
“So…” The eldest of the group steps in the room, hesitant. “Care to tell me how-“
“No.” Minho bluntly speaks, and you cock a bemused brow at his forwardness.
“Got it,” Chan nods quickly, eyes zeroing in on you for a moment, honing a stare you can’t discern.
“Y/N?” He quietly asks where you lift from your spot.
“Wanna come with me for a minute?” He hums, and you curiously follow him into the kitchen, plopping on the counter he motions for you to sit on.
“Lift up your shirt,” He softly instructs, and you do a double take to make sure you heard him right. 
“Huh?”
Nonplussed, he repeats himself, appearing completely unaffected despite such a request.
So slowly, nervously, you lift your shirt as he nonchalantly maneuvers antiseptic from a medical container, your brain registering the predicament as he dabs right below your chest, bottom lip held in his teeth while he works.
Your scratch from earlier on the fence.
Leave it to him to be the ever perceptive one.
Chan doesn’t budge, shy away, nor show any reaction to the newfound vulnerability. Your heart warms a bit at the sight. 
He cares, and you’ve known that, but it’s just, it’s sweet. Really, truly sweet.
Immediately upon applying the antiseptic, you wince, your grip (which you noticed) on his arm tightening while he calmly hushed you, carefully placing a bandaid on top of the wound. 
“If you don’t dress it properly you could get an infection.” Chan explains. “Tell me next time, okay?” 
You nod as he rearranged his materials below the cabinet and ensured you’ve hopped off the countertop.
“Lix told me you used to be a restaurant’s chef in Hongdae, eh?”
At this, he looked up in surprise, chuckling lowly, lips situating themselves into a sheepish straight line.
“Lix?” He echoes, and you tilt your head, evidently confused as to what he’s asking.
“Mm nothin’, just not many people can call him Lix,” He explains, padding into the living room.
“Really? Am I just the lucky one?” Snickering to yourself, the man nudges your side with his own squeaky laugh as you enter into the living room.
“That’s.. a word for it.”
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It’s hard to recall when the gears really began turning. Breaking from rusty shackles to rotate seamlessly.
Chan opening up and giving you a glimpse of the heartthrob of a personality beneath his once cold facade. Han and Hyunjin able to have a normal conversation, talking to Jeongin more and more about anything and everything.
Maybe it’s the familiarity, the routine that naturally mends. Like a new fridge you hadn’t realized you were so accustomed to until gone, until you look back at what was.
A part of you wants to give yourself a pat on the back as if you were the person responsible for this summer school’s progress. Though, you’re sure just about four hundred other things also left an imprint. 
Late nights spent in the old club room. Arranging meetups for filming spots. Headaches from the sound of a power drill where props are put together. Endless repeats of the same scene everyone keeps messing up.
And all of a sudden, it hurts. Because this is one of those moments. Fleeting. Fleeting in the sense that—as you watch Chan and Seungmin burst out laughing when Changbin fails a prop test—never again in this entire world will there ever be another night like this. 
Felix won’t accidentally spill his drink. Minho won’t throw a childish fit after he gets his twenty-fifth take wrong. 
There won’t ever be another summer like this. A summer in your senior year of high school you really don’t want to forget right now, not if it costs it all to stay engrained in your mind.
“Alright. So..” Chan begins, the nine of you clambering to get a glance of his screen as he finishes the final touches.
“We’re finally done!”
It takes a whopping three weeks to finish filming and editing, the clamorous chorus of relief sounding in unison as your group’s unofficial (though wordlessly voted) leader, Chan, taps the save button one last time.
Your film covers the tale of two. Fated, yet, unable to ever meet. A constant tug of war of souls infinitely bound.
One steps north, the other makes five steps south. Pulled together like magnets even when worlds apart in all aspects, even when it seems they’re only given more reasons to avoid each other.
..Yes, you certainly thought of what Felix told you that bit ago.
No, you have been thinking about it.
When they filmed; those certain scenes where you’d watch them make eye contact. Oh to listen to the thoughts behind those eyes.
So leaden with emotion. 
Longing.
A longing for what was, for what could’ve been.
To watch two people like that makes your ears ring. So much said in the hurried lines, the occasional eye-contact. 
Listen, listen. You’ll miss it if you blink.
How gut-wrenching to be a witness to such tragedy you never were involved in. Perhaps that’s human empathy.
You inhale and exhale, but don’t count for how long. Watching the film on the that old projector sheet makes you wish you narrowed things down to the tee, scribbled them down in a notebook to recall for eternity.
Too fast, too fast. You’ll miss it if you breathe.
No, stay forever. 
If only. 
And perhaps that’s the best part.
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Stray Kids places fourth place in the festival, and to be honest, you might as well have taken home first.
It sure felt like it.
Smiles and laughter. Congratulations and many thank you’s amidst a densely packed theatre room. 
Though, something is missing. No, someone is missing. Because in the midst of a celebration intended for everyone, it suddenly comes to your attention a presence has gone awry.
Meeting Chan’s eyes, it appears he just realized as well.
Han.
.
.
.
“Jisung where the hell were yo—“ 
Having stormed through the oddly unlocked door like a madman, Chan stops, noticing how positively bruised the boy is, sharp cut veering across his nose, lip busted and bloody.
Hurriedly forcing his face between either of Chan’s hands, Han winces. 
“Tell me everything.” The older of the two demands, eyes racing. 
Quick to pull away, his mouth pulls taut. It’s quiet before Han kicks the cabinet, voice watery, breaking. 
“Fuck!” He clutches his head, biting back the prospect of crying. 
Dropping down to bury his head in his knees, he stifles a shaky exhale.
“..These guys from Class 3-B broke my bike, that’s why I couldn’t go.” 
Ah.
There’s a stillness.
Then, quietly, Chan shuffles down beside Jisung, mirroring the way his knees sit close to his chest, back flush against the wooden cabinets below the sink.
“I just.. wish I was stronger,” Jisung hardly manages, words barely audible through a trembling bottom lip.
Sparing moments of silence, Chan’s jaw tightens, attention directed onto the tile floor.
“I’m quitting the football team.”
Jisung’s head snaps to the adjacent boy. 
“But why? Football’s your forte. Plus, you kick ass every time your name gets called out onto the field.”
Chan ruffles the boys hair, giving him a tight smile.
“I have.. other priorities right now.” His voice shrinks, hand resting atop Jisung’s head, staring into those bottomless brown eyes. 
He’s grateful no other questions were asked.
“Say,” He begins, his counterpart experimentally prodding his swollen eye, cringing back with a hiss. 
“I can help you get stronger.”
Slowly, the younger’s head turns, brows raised as if asking: “really?”, to which Chan nods, a faint grin tugging at his lips. 
‘Reach for me’, and Chan reaches. 
Jisung oftentimes thought the boy foolish to trust so blindly, to pour so much into someone who could easily let you down.
Yet, seeing the fist his friend held out, he returns the fist bump with a feeble grin, head slumping onto the older boy’s shoulder.
This time, an exception has been made.
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There were many weird circumstances in Minho’s life, but he certainly hadn’t anticipated this one.
“..What are you doing?” Minho inquires flatly, slowing his bike down whilst Han, dripping in sweat, jogs past, avidly motivated for a reason the bystander can’t quite understand on a Tuesday morning.
He planned to bike into town and buy extra soil for his grandmother’s garden, now finding himself unable to ignore this strange appearance.
“Conditioning! New year new me!”
Minho sends the boy a mildly disgusted, mildly annoyed expression in reply.
“It’s June.” 
“Leave me be.”
His sarcastic brow returned with Han’s entertained giggle, the older boy finding it irritably hard to resist an approaching smile, pedaling to catch up to him.
How burdensome, Minho thinks.
“Is this about the Film Festival?” 
Gliding past, Han’s eyes widen into saucers.
“Please don’t tell me Y/n’s mad I couldn’t show up, I’m scared she’ll beat me up or something on Monday.”
He grins at the sheepish plea.
“She’s not, trust me.”
“And why should I trust you?”
Minho shrugs. “Why not?”
“Fair,” Han deflates, stopping to catch his breath, balancing his hands on his knees. 
The other boy, observing his exhaustion as he pushes on his brakes, grants him a side-eye, patting the back of his bike.
“Want a ride?”
Han, looking up with sweat wrecking his hair to stick up in wild directions, gradually nods, uttering a quiet “Feels like I’m cheating” as he climbs behind Minho, legs dangling off the side. 
The ride is peaceful, rice fields flourishing, fields dappled with flowers of all sorts of hues on the way to town, breeze cooling down Han’s heated face, whipping his linen shirt in each gust.
Neither talk, simply enjoying the weather, the smells, the sounds.   
Though, the enjoyment is quelled as soon as it began, Minho lugging a bag of soil atop where the younger boy had sat on the back of his bike—said boy lingering outside the gardening shop.
Door bells clanging overhead when he exits, Han gives him a questioning look as he works on tying the soil down.
“..Where am I gonna sit?” He questions aloud, and the devilish boy can’t help but wear an evil smile.
“You’re not,” He says matter-of-a-fact, swinging a leg over the seat, watching despair cross his friend’s face. 
“New year new you, right? Good luck!”
Quickly racing off on his bike, Minho laughs at Han’s shouting while he disappears in the distance, knowing full well the silent-treatment he’ll receive later at school.
Oh the throes (and woes) of summer.
Meanwhile, you’re helping Chan hang laundry in his backyard, having reviewed more of an album him, Han, and Changbin have been working on after the festival. 
The longer you listen, the more you find Chan has a knack for curating incredible music, enough that you find yourself leaning infinitely close to the old monitor of his, craning into each note the speaker procures.
“So I was thinking,” Chan clicks his tongue, hanging a t-shirt to the close pins. “What if we had a unit name? Han, Binnie and I?”
Processing his question in your mind, you purse your lips, wiping beading moisture from your forehead.
“What’d you have in mind?” You pique, giving the boy a sidelong glance, mischief evident on your face. 
Mirroring your grin, he steps down from the stool, giving you a hand as you step from yours.
“3RACHA? Cause like.. we’re three and we’re hot like Sriracha?”
Instantly, you both burst out into giggles, smacking his shoulder at the sly phrasing. 
“No no I’m kidding—“
“I like it!” You loudly interject, bringing the water bottle up to your lips.
Chan’s eyes bulge out of his skull, tilt in his head, a hint of surprise etched on sun kissed skin.
“Really?”
“Yeah! I like it! 3RACHA fits,” Elaborating with exaggerated hand gestures, the spectator has to bite back his smile, dimples nudging at his cheeks.
“I’ll let them know,” He raises his brows, giving you a small high five before officially collapsing on the grass, you following suit.
By the time your eyes open again, you can’t even recall what happened in the first place, trying to figure out why the sky is already pitch black, not to mention why you’re still lying in the grass. 
Leave it to falling asleep to waste your day away.
Leaning over where you stretch your arms, Chan grins, extending a hand to help you up that you gratefully accept—granted an explanation as to how you ultimately fell asleep while he was mid conversation.
Waving him off upon noticing nighttime’s introduction, you begin back past school, crossing by the playing fields in the process.
And of course, lo and behold, Minho sits on the bleachers, watching an ongoing football practice while glancing down at his lap here and there, apparently writing something.
Seems today you’re running into everyone, huh?
Perks (and curses) of a small town.
Curiosity driving your feet toward him, you carefully jump up the steps, sitting beside him without word.
He obviously senses your presence but fails to speak up, simply letting you peek over his shoulder at his notes (to which you learned were for a class), occasionally striking conversation only to engulf in comfortable quietness once more.
“Hey Minho?” You inhale slowly, heel tapping again the metal bleacher plank below.
He grunts in acknowledgment. 
“Do you think I’m doing a good job?” 
The football coaches whistle blows alarmingly loud, causing either of you to involuntarily flinch. 
Minho, lifting his head from his notebook, studies your face for a moment, from the way your nose perches to your parted lips, he analyzes.
Returning to your eyes, he blinks.
“I do. I mean, we all like you whether we admit it or not.”
The statement causes a smile to stretch your cheeks, turning to face him. 
“Why?”
“Hm.. You actually treated us like human..? It’s like,” He scoffs, one brow twitching upward the longer he thinks. It’s the first time you noticed the small freckle seated atop his right nostril. 
Charming.
“Everybody else seemed to think we were animals.” 
Hearing him say that, it’s almost.. cruel. To think these boys simply needed a friend, a person to count on for a bit. 
But they didn’t. They were deprived.
Yet, in a twisted way, it worked out. Because it led them to you.
“Well you’re doing it right.. I think.”
You shift your weight back onto your hands, humid air finally cooling into an even breeze.
“Thanks Min.”
“Mhm.”
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You’ve grown accustomed to accepting good things never last. It’s one of the many things keeping your grip tight on anything you get ahold of.
Though, it strikes you nearly dizzy how quickly something so good turned sour. 
As in, what was once near-conversation between Minho and Felix has now diminished into distanced glares and horrifically heavy silence like before.
Asking the more openly emotional of the two leads to nothing. No explanation, no reasoning. Just a shrug when you ask: “Hey, what’s up with you and Minho?”
More than ever with this group had you learned assumptions lead nowhere. But when assumptions are the sole thing to be made, you feel quite like you’re chasing your own tail in this predicament.
“Minho, you have to come to school. I’m responsible for your attendance.” 
Amongst the week and a half the boy had been absent, you don’t plan to waste the opportunity for confrontation.
No, it isn’t your usual approach, but any softer and he’ll slip right through your fingertips like warmed butter.
Back facing you where he’d been routinely walking his bike behind his house, you stand firm, eyes trained to the cowlick embedded in his hair.
He doesn’t move, nor budge a single centimeter—voice cut and concise upon speaking.
“I’ve been busy.” 
“You’ve been avoiding Felix.”
You can hear him inhale sharply, not daring to turn around.
“I know it isn’t my business, but there was this.. time Felix and I spoke. You two had a falling out again.. right?”
Prodding deeper into the wound, you can feel your heart constricting tighter and tighter in your chest.
“You’re right.” He whispers, tone low enough you crane to hear. “It isn’t your business.”
It’s your turn to suck in a quick breath.
“And.. it isn’t your place pretending like you know what my life is like. I… I’ll come back to school just-“
Ah. That hiccup. The shudder of his shoulders, the ache in his vocal cords.
“Let me deal with this by myself, alright?”
Who are you to disagree? Spoken seconds earlier, it isn’t your business nor your place shoving your nose into his life. 
Synonymously, you don’t blame him. Blame his irritation, his evasiveness.
Whatever this is with Felix runs deeper. It takes but a single glance to dictate that conclusion. Minho’s loss, his hurt. Bottled up feelings bubbling over in their soda can.
When so much of you is battered, you hide, hide in fear that everything will be ripped from your fingertips — that horrid feeling of helplessness; forging grief continuing to wrack you numb.
Minho distanced himself to protect himself, but most importantly to protect them. To protect his friends, to protect Felix.
And yet, he forgot to install a safety net around his own perimeter.
Jittering hands frantically reaching for his bike’s handlebars, and you spectate wordlessly as abundant tears streak down his cheeks the moment a glimpse of his face is seen, fingernails furiously digging into the aged rubber.
“Minho.”
The boy shakes his head, sniffling senselessly before you step forward and grab his collar, lightly yanking him up, redirecting once castaway focus staring down to the cracked pavement below.
“Minho.”
Just then you notice his watery eyes and the heartbreaking, trembling frown adorning his features. Stifling tears.
Thumb carefully tracing his waterline to rid of those beading tears, he leans into your hand, face breaking a bit.
“Just.. please don’t deal with this alone, okay?”
Looking into someone’s eyes had never made you feel like you were dying until now. How can a soul carry such heavy heartache? Grieve so tirelessly even the eyes form as a window?
So broken, so beautiful.
We’re all the same, are we not?
.
.
.
Ten minutes later, seated upon the playing field’s bleachers familiar to the last time you encountered Minho, a comfortable silence answers any of the unspoken questions lingering in afternoon skies.
The boy beside you, puffy eyes and swollen skin, quietly delights in an ice cream bar, your own held between your lips in contemplation before utilizing your thumb and index to speak for a moment.
“I mean, I may dance around in my room to music, but that doesn’t mean I don’t cry in the shower at night. I’m still human, y’know?” 
Curious feline eyes hang onto your words, enough of a beckon to go on.
“My days can be bright, my nights could be dark, there’s no limit to how you’re supposed to feel.”
Leaning forward, you tap his chest with your unoccupied hand.
“And there’s no need to try and reject something you want to feel. Otherwise, you suffocate.”
He tilts his head.
“It’s like.. hmm… if I hated the way I breathed—“
“You hate the way you breathe?” Minho interrupted, giving you an “are you stupid?” look you quickly shake your head at.
“No no, it’s an example,” You defend with a feigned scowl. “So if I hated the way I breathed, I can’t just hold my breath for too long or a pass out, right? You can’t let yourself get to a blackout point for the sake of others.”
The boy across from you sucks on the skin of his cheek, observing your extended pinkie before taking it in his own.
“Promise me you won’t get to that blackout point.” 
Another promise.
Chan, now Minho.
Expression knit thoughtfully, Minho gradually nods, pressing your thumbs together before cracking an amused grin.
“Y’know, that was well-said.”
You chuckle, smacking his shoulder playfully. “I know right? I’m proud of that one.”
Of course he rolls his eyes in return, but you can see the remnant of a smile in the lifted corners of his mouth, the soft, flushed skin of his under eyes crinkling when he grins.
Ah. He’s beautiful, isn’t he?
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On July 31th, your summer school class officially makes a close, and you and eight other boys graduate. 
A miracle, maybe a fluke or some sort you made it out in one piece. A task proved possible after all—intentionally or unintentionally.
In the end, perhaps there wasn’t reason to stare at each sheet and pinpoint flaws.
No, Chris isn’t void of life. Hyunjin doesn’t have a superiority complex, and Jisung certainly isn’t senseless. Seungmin gets nervous ordering coffee and hasn’t participated in illegal activities a day in his life. Felix isn’t in an underground gang, and no one has stolen before. 
There’s too many sides to a cube, so most stick to 2D squares. The complexity is shrunk so it’s easier to digest. 
In the end, perhaps you forget it’s all so wondrous in a way, so intricate and raw. 3D. 
Right before you graduated, Hyunjin gave you a painting he made. ‘A thank you for motivating me to add art as my friend’ he had told you. 
Changbin still sleeps with his Snorlax plushie, and 3RACHA released their first album just yesterday. 
Han finally got his license, Seungmin and Jeongin attend Sejong University as freshman, and Felix sells baked goods on Sundays while interning at a local bakery.
Minho volunteers at an animal shelter on the far side of town, he also took up dancing again.
He and Felix began talking again too. 
In the end, perhaps it wasn’t a matter of you helping them, but for the all of you to understand that, in the grand scheme of things, you live on, just as you and Chan had promised.
There is no choice, no point, no break to the cycle. 
It hurts, it burns, it breaks. You glue yourself together, even when the pieces shatter over and over. Shards draw blood, but a glued glass can still be useful, can still be worthy. 
Bruised and battered, scraped and scorned, a connection lies within Stray Kids that sinks deeper than the anchor you planted in a sea of possibilty, a sea of what you thought was something one-sided, a sea you once believed you’d swim alone.
Maybe it’s discovery after discovery that keeps you close, or maybe it’s something deeper.
Nonetheless, your summer—a summer of hellish heartbreak and love reaping all bounds of repercussion—was one to remember.  
A summer solace, for what it’s worth. 
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