#but I love when people have long grudges going back like 10+ years

[animalcrossingshowdown]

i really never thought a game like animal crossing would have such negative people playing it. y'all HATE certain villagers??? HATE entire personality types??? talking about people not liking your villager and feeling bad about it but seeing nothing wrong with shitting on other peoples favorites...

anon has clearly never been in any fandom for cute things lmao

[ghoste-catte]

I'm on my hands and knees asking you about your favorite gaalee moments (spin offs count bc why wouldn't they)

Anon ... I'm sorry I took a while to answer this for you, but it's because you activated my trap card. But without further ado ... here are my top 10 GaaLee moments.

(My 10th pick and rationale beneath the cut)

The Drop Kick So, I feel like we don't talk about this kick often enough. Because this is actually the first time anyone draws blood on Gaara (we see the scratch on his face once his head pops back up). As much time as was given in canon to Gaara's reaction to Sasuke drawing his blood, I don't really understand why Lee being the first to cut him wasn't as big a deal.

The Primary Lotus This is ... probably the first time Gaara's been touched hand-to-body in years. I've written a few times (and shout out to @egregiousderp for their hand in this headcanon) about how this was probably the first approximation of a hug that Gaara had since Yashamaru. He replaces himself with a sand clone halfway down, but for the initial drop, that's just Lee holding him.

The Rescue I wasn't able to find my favorite screenshot from this moment, which is the one where Gaara's sand is rushing to save Lee and it kind of looks like a heart, but anyway, I just love this pivot. The fact that Gaara uses the very weapon he used to crush Lee's dreams to save him. The way Lee still tries to be an equal partner in this fight despite his injuries. The "I don't hold a grudge!"

The Talk This moment means a lot to me. It's a deep conversation to have, and it's one that happens on two levels that I think aren't fully addressed by the narrative. Of course, on the surface, they're talking about Kimimaro and Orochimaru, but the subtext goes something like: Gaara: Even if people love me, I'm still a monster. All they would need to do is be desperate and lonely enough, and I might seem like a good choice. Lee: The fact that people love you proves you're not a monster! Obviously Gaara gets the final word in this conversation, but I do like to think it sinks in later on and influences their relationship in the future.

The Walk Home I hate that we only get to see this in flashbacks in filler episodes (although we do get to see it twice from two different perspectives!)

But I love this moment because of the way that Gaara chooses to carry Lee: he slings him over his shoulder with one arm. If you go back and watch Gaara and his siblings returning to Suna after his fight with Naruto, that's exactly the way first Kankuro, and then Temari, carry him when he's wounded.

This moment is during that time where Gaara's still learning how to be a person and not a weapon, and the fact that he chooses to carry Lee with such care … it feels relationship-defining.

6. The Eighth Gate That flashback that Gaara has to Gai and Lee's relationship shows that he's really internalized the defining impact Lee had on his life. The genuine care and concern that he looks at Lee with in that moment despite Lee's stubborn insistence that he won't be sad makes my heart ache for the both of them.

7. The Retreat If you've ever read one of my fics that's set during the war and notice that I mention Gaara carrying Lee around on his sand, this is what I'm talking about. I love that Lee sees the sand as an unequivocal source of safety instead of threat at this point (to the point of entrusting it to carry Gai-sensei in his frail state). And I love that this seems to be Gaara's default way of pulling Lee out of danger ... it's at least the second time he's done it, after all:

8. Gaara-kun! This was one of The Moments for me. We as a ship had been speculating so long about the degree of intimacy of Lee and Gaara's relationship. We'd spent, I think, a decade at this point writing fics where Lee called Gaara "Kazekage-sama". Then the Perfect Day for a Wedding arc dropped, and here's Lee calling Gaara "Gaara-kun" just like he does the rest of his friends ... wind was blown into the ship's sails on this day.

9. The Double Date Gaara and Lee go on a double date with Tenten and Kankuro to Ichiraku Ramen. This is canon. 'Nuff said.

And now, for number 10 ... drumroll please ...

10. The ILY I know, I know - those handsigns don't mean the same in JSL as they do in ASL. But my little hard-of-hearing heart can't help but see Lee shooting double "I love you"s at Gaara in this moment. And even if he's not, the starry eyes and blushy cheeks say it all. This is flirting, y'all.

[capricores]

Taurus moon culture post please 🩷🦋🫶🏻

holding grudges so strongly it probably carries over to another life

feeling an extreme connection to nature, probably owns a significant amount of plants (or dreams about having a huge garden/house full of plants) and/or spends a lot of time outdoors

animals tend to love them instantly, and they have a very strong connection to them (especially to cats)

struggles immensely with vulnerability and opening up

takes 8-10 business years to get over things, especially heartbreak

emotional relief likely comes the most through immersion in nature (hiking, kayaking, meditating outdoors, etc), physical activity (yoga, hiking) and/or retail therapy

probably very into things such as aromatherapy, incense, crystals

uses purchases of little treats as a coping method. cannot survive without making frequent lil purchases

despite this ^ i find they're often (depending on other placements, especially venus, though) extremely good with money and even their "emotional/impulse" purchases tend to be budgeted

CEO of repressing emotions, often really struggles with opening up, even to themselves (ie: struggles with accepting their emotions/just feeling them)

tendency to fixate on people, things: they'll have a comfort movie they rewatch at least 2x a month for their entire life, a comfort meal that's eaten weekly for years, etc

when they crush on someone, it's slow to develop, and lasts a long time. the type of crush on the same person for years and years but never say anything (it takes them sooo many years to admit their feelings, and they're virtually never the first one to say it)

they're often guilty of falling in love with friends as they're attracted to comfort/familiarity. definitely not the app dating/speed date type, they need to know someone for a significant period of time before developing actual feelings

tends to be very possessive: over their lover, their friends, their resources

they are so, so loyal and i find (depending on other placements) are rarely gossipy, you don't have to worry about them talking behind your back

stubborn, of course. my way or the highway mindset. can struggle with god complexes and can be a bit close-minded at times (not as bad as taurus sun/mercury/ascendant though)

generally have very laidback, easy-going energy. even when stressed, going through emotional turmoil, they always come off as calm and collected. they tend to be a rock for other people

people tend to naturally look to them for guidance, mentorship, advice; they're often taken very seriously even from a younger age

has extremely high standards for themselves and struggles with perfectionism

undeveloped they have problems with resource-hoarding. very much "what's mine is MINE but what's yours is also mine" lol; can be selfish when undeveloped (but completely opposite when developed!)

napping queens these moons often deal with problems by taking a big sleep

this is a through thick and thin placement: they do not give up on people or things easily. they're amazing friends and partners as they really stay committed and do everything they can to make things work (sometimes to a fault, they can stay in bad situations/with bad people for a long time due to not letting go/not wanting to "give up")

very nurturing and caring personalities, they're always ensuring their loved ones have their needs met; even when their own needs aren't met

i find they often have the most beautiful, aesthetically pleasing and cozy home/room environments! they often get shaken up/can't function if their space is messy and not decorated + organized

love languages? gifts. physical touch. acts of service.

their emotions tend to be very stable, not super prone to mood swings (dependent on rest of chart). in general are just very consistent people

struggles a lot with stepping outside of their comfort zones and can miss out on opportunities due to fear

disclaimer: your entire chart will shape who you are, not to mention your current transits, progressions, solar return, etc. you may not relate to all points despite having this placement due to other astrological factors.

[royboyfanpage]

What would you consider to be the defining characteristics of Roy? Like what makes Roy Harper well Roy Harper?

Please and Thank You ☺️

Hi! That is a really great question

Okay the first defining characteristic is easy to answer: love. Romantic, platonic, familial etc. He loves so strongly, and once he’s loved someone once he’s pretty much gonna love them forever. You can see it with Lian (which I think is particularly present during Lian’s early appearances- baby Lian era- but is also very evident all throughout her existence), you can see it with how he never stopped loving Jade, you can see it with how he lets his heart get broken for Donna, you can see it with Dick and Ollie and Dinah and everyone important to his life, and regardless of if these people hurt him he’s still gonna love them. Which leads onto his second defining characteristic-

Forgiveness, and emotional honesty. In my opinion, a good Roy Harper does not hold grudges, at least not for very long. This is something that I think’s most interestingly demonstrated in Titans (1999) #15, wherein the Fab Five are all on an island together where their emotions are being manipulated to turn them against each other. And the main reason I think this issue in particular is so interesting is because when everyone else is there bringing up resentments and grudges, particularly towards Roy, Roy doesn’t. The only times that it could be argued that Gargoyle’s manipulating Roy’s emotions to make him more hostile, it’s always in direct response to something else that’s happened there- take, Dick insulting Roy and calling him unreliable, for example. And when you think about it, it makes a lot of sense. Roy’s generally perceived as the “hothead” of the group and, while I don’t like it that much as a negative connotation (though there are undoubtedly some moments where it is a negative), it is in a way true. He’s very much an immediate responder- he won’t let things fester, he’ll immediately call things out when he doesn’t like them, and then once he’s gotten that out in the air he’ll drop it even without any apology (which, to be honest, 9/10 times he does not get an apology). He doesn’t hold grudges because he takes action immediately against things he doesn’t like, and then ends it there once he’s voiced his thoughts. He forgives incredibly easily, which unfortunately has made him a bit of a punching bag among his friends- everybody knows Roy as the one who doesn’t hold things against you, and so they don’t have many reservations about calling him a junkie or insulting him (which as a little aside is why I love Roy punching Dick in Outsiders so much- this isn’t a new occurrence, people have been calling him a junkie for years, but he actually stands up for himself which. Good for you baby.) Obviously this isn’t always the case, and a really interesting casual observation I’ve made recently is that it’s definitely something that came about more after Lian was born. I haven’t thought about this in great depth before, so I’m not taking into account the original Teen Titans run because it’s currently 5am and I cannot be arsed to reread it all looking for panels that back up my point, but Roy’s emotional honesty was definitely not as key pre-Lian as it after she came into his life, particularly surrounding Ollie. Maybe I’ll make a separate post about this at some point when I’ve thought about it more, but essentially my point is that Roy promised Lian that he wouldn’t lie to her, and a part of not lying is being more open and honest in all aspects of your life.

And then the next is Roy’s abandonment issues. Is he even Roy Harper if he doesn’t have abandonment issues. A key part of Roy’s relationships is that he expects them end, he expects everything to go wrong and for him to be once again left on his own. The most clear example of this is with Donna, particularly their relationship in Titans ‘99. In #5, he asks her on their date “With all the great guys in your life, why the hell are you out here with me?” To which her answer is essentially he’s not Dick, Garth, Wally, or Kyle, nothing about who he is, just who he’s not, which she later expands on in #6 by saying she wanted to date him for his “reputation”, so she could be seen as less of a nice girl, which again, isn’t really saying anything about Roy as a person, just what function he can provide as a boyfriend at that time. And then again in #15 (have I mentioned before that the Gargoyle storyline is one of the absolute best stories for Roy analysis? Because it is) when Donna tells Roy that she doesn’t intend on staying with him, saying “when we break up”, Roy just… leaves. Which I think is a really interesting juxtaposition against the last point I made, it’s one of the few instances where Roy actually can’t immediately voice his feelings because he just can’t handle having his fears confirmed one more time, he has to leave. And then when Donna and Roy finally have their heart to heart at the end of Donna’s “who is” arc (I can’t remember the exact issue), Roy has this… one split second, one single panel where you can see his pain, before he puts a mask on to go back to the carefree Roy Harper, essentially telling her he’s glad he chose her out of everyone to experiment and that he’ll always love her regardless of if they’re in a relationship, despite the fact Donna doesn’t really acknowledge his feelings- just Lian’s. I just think it’s really interesting how Roy’s usual openness about his emotions isn’t as present with Donna, and he’s way more likely to lie to her to hide his pain. And Roy’s abandonment issues are so important throughout his story- he can’t stand being alone, he’s hardly ever a solo hero, but he expects it. There are a lot of reasons why Roy got addicted to drugs, but the main one which was present in both the original Snowbirds comic (through Roy’s speech about how “someone” might turn to drugs in order to deal with an “older friend” leaving them) and his Secret Origins story is that he turned to drugs because he couldn’t handle Ollie leaving. I’m not gonna go into depth with Snowbirds here, I’ve already done that a lot, but his abandonment issues are absolutely a core part of his character particularly in the fact he’s proven right so often. But what’s most interesting is something I made a post about before is that Roy’s abandonment issues don’t manifest in the way you’d expect. Usually, a character who has abandonment issues will hide themself away, not let anybody close for fear of being hurt again. Roy? His arms are always open. He will let them into his life, fully expecting them to hurt him, and he’ll do this again and again and again. He’s attracted to it like a moth to a flame- he can’t be alone, he’s an extrovert to the highest degree, and he keeps getting his heart broken because it’s always on his sleeve.

There’s a lot more I could talk about here, but I’ve been typing for like an hour and my fingers hurt now. I hope this is satisfactory :)

[askuemki]

ranting about WCUE

I have ALOT of (maybe) unnecessary grudges with so many things abt WCUE. I love reading rants, so I'll as might as well put out my own too. To the people (probably most of my followers) who don't know what the game is, basically it's a children's game on Roblox based off of the book series Warrior Cats, by Erin Hunter. I apologize in advance, there may be some lingo you may not understand.

So WCUE has been my comfort game for many, many years. Partly, it's my childhood and it's just a game I can just go and chill. Make silly cats without working my ass off on drawing. But when I want to actually go and try and join a clan? Have fun roleplaying a little? (I'll admit, it's a fun thing from time to time.) Every. Single. Fucking. clan. Never manages to keep itself up. It takes SO LONG to set things up. To get the right people. It'll take hours for a clan to get running. And for what? For people to sit in the clearing? For your complicated "fun" plots to fall flat? I don't get being picky. Sure, you want your major roles to have experience, to know their shit. But if you keep yearning for that one miss perfect medicine cat who knows all of the out of game herbs? Bullshit. Major roles are here to have fun too, not to just manage. It's so frustrating whenever I want to be a leader, or a medic and to have 1000's of kids yapping at my toes. You're expected to babysit. To do their wishes. You only matter as a major because you're needed. Something else with these "experienced roleplays" is the cliques. People form friend groups, that's natural. But if it's a game where people are SUPPOSED to chat and cooperate, what's the point if you don't include them too? Those prophecy plots? It's only fun if you're the main character. People who join later are confused, or you get shoved into the back. And when the rules are established? NOBODY upholds them after 10 minutes. I'm tired of seeing people sitting in the clearing, or moping around alone. I'll admit I'm quite guilty sitting by myself, but at some point you'll need to get thing going with one or more people. You'll eventually get demotivated from loneliness. Another thing, "exp" people. (Or cats, per say.) It frustrates me to see people using these unnecessarily lengthy words to describe something. Incandescent, tarsal bones, premolars, dentations, all of that bullshit-you don't need those words when people can't even understand you. Recently, I got some real good advice from a mentor. Good writing doesn't involve using these long words. If they aren't in your everyday vocabulary? Just don't. Don't use them. You come off as arrogant and show offish. (Unless that's how you intend to display yourself.) Good writing involves clarity, making things CLEAR for other people. Instead of using words only Shakespear would use, why not describe your surroundings in your descriptions? Other cats? Going in depth with thoughts? If you want to go the route where you're using complicated vocabulary, at least research the words you want to use. Again, I'm guilty for this phase.

My partner was telling me about how she was auditioning for medic, and the person auditioning posted this question: "What herb tastes tangy and bitter?" (or something of the like.) It was yarrow. At least according to a quick search- it's supposed to taste like licorice. I'm convinced clan founders auditioning medics are making shit up. What herb is this? What herb is that? The more "experienced" players lean towards out of game herbs, and it gives an unfair advantage for players wanting that role. I don't have time in my day to study herbs like I'm studying for my exams. The "unexperienced" players (maybe this can also be for everyone) have problems too, I'm not going to just complain about the veteran members. HARASSMENT. There's those people who shoo spectators away like pests. It's a public server. It isn't YOUR clan, let them exist. It pisses me off when they're so abrupt and arrogant about it. If you ask? Maybe they'd be more willing to move away. It also sucks when there is a valid roleplay with specific lore, and (agreeable) rules to follow, and people insert themselves like they're the main character. No, SpeckledPelt you can't have the leader role just because you equipped the icon. No BloodBush (fuck you, specifically), you wanted to join the clan; don't boss the host around when they're trying to set things up for you. I miss the WCUE where we didn't have to be so choosey about the people we appoint for roles. I miss the WCUE where we can be silly and fun, without having to feel sophisticated. Sure maybe the name "MochaHeart" is a little wacky, but at least they're doing their best to roleplay. To have fun.

[sillytaetime]

J.JK~ Back in time

Desc:// Since graduating high school, you started a part-time job at a cafe. One day during your shift, your high school bully comes in but he’s HOT.

Warnings:// Slight angst, enemies to lovers, fluff

Pairings:// Bully!Jk x Nerdy!reader

WC:// 892

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I’ve never had any boyfriends. In high school, I was kind of seen as the ugly duckling. I was called names, pushed around, and told I wasn’t good enough. It can’t get any worse than that, right? Wrong. Jeon Jungkook made it worse. He was the school’s bully. He turned into a really big jerk after his crush turned him down for being too ugly. In a sense, I felt bad for him. 

I don’t know why i was the one he chose to target, but I was the chosen one, I guess. 

Jungkook gave me many nicknames from freshman year to senior year. His favorite ones were cow, fuckface, and oxygen thief. Over time I grew immune to his insults. Did I believe every word he said? Yeah, but it no longer hurt the way it did freshman year.

I guess it became a kind of feud between us. I started fighting back junior year. 

“Hey fuckface.” “Hey puddle shit.” “Damn, a new nickname? It’s like you never stop thinking about me.” He had a point, I dwell trying to come up with new things to say to him in my free time. “Anyways, too bad we only have 1 month left with each other till we graduate.” You were very aware of this. You’ve been counting down the days till graduation, when you’d no longer have to look this shit stain in the face. 

~ 1 year after graduation ~

Since my high school graduation, i started working at a cafe that’s about a block away from my apartment and 2 blocks away from my college. It pays decent. I’m saving up to be able to get a car. My parents don’t have the money to lend me anything so I’m working to support myself all on my own and I have been since the day I turned 18. 

Maybe the reason I was bullied so much was because my parents never made much. I often had to wear clothes more than once in a week without washing it, my socks had holes in them, and my shoes were practically falling apart but at least I had 2 loving parents who did their best.

Today, I work a really long shift. I have to open the cafe and close up. About 10 hours into my shift, a very hot but familiar man walks through the door and up to my register. “Hey, I’ll get a caramel macchiato, please” “Coming right up, that’ll be $6.25″ The man pays and goes and sits by the window with his drink. 

Everyone had left, except for this guy. I was getting ready to close up, so I walked over to where he had sat these last 2 hours. “Hey, we’re getting ready to close up for the night...” “Oh, right. Sorry, I must have lost track of time.” He looks at me and his jaw drops. “Y/N?” He knows my name?? “Do I know you?” He seems kind of surprised that you don’t remember him. He was so hot I definitely would’ve remembered him. “It’s Jeon Jungkook from high school.” 

Oh, holy fuck. Since when was the Jeon Jungkook this hot? “It’s been a while, how have you been?” “I’ve been well. Mostly studying for my classes.” “Well, look at who’s the nerd now.” I laugh. He laughs too. “Would you maybe want to go for a walk in the park and catch up?” I nod and start making my way towards the door.

Why would i turn him down? I don’t really hold grudges against people, high school is high school. Sure, he was a jerk, but I wasn’t nice to him either.

For about half an hour, we just walked in silence, enjoying the sunset until he spoke up. “Listen, I feel really bad about how I treated you in high school.” “It’s ok, i didn’t treat you well either.” “No, it’s not ok. I deserved every name you called me. You never deserved that. I got my feelings hurt and I just immediately started treated you badly because I was embarrassed you didn’t like me back.” 

Wait... Was I the girl? “What do you mean I didn’t like you back?” “I left those flowers and note in your locker, and you threw them away. Remember?” Oh shit. I thought that was a practical joke and that no one actually liked me. “Oh my god, i feel so bad now.” “Don’t, it taught me a lot.” “Really?” “Yeah, it taught me that if i really want something I need to go up and do it myself instead of just leaving a stupid note.” “I guess that’s a pretty valuable lesson.” “Yeah, I’m really glad i ran into you actually, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.” 

He stops walking and turns to me. “I can’t live my life regretting the way I told you in high school, so I want to ask you out properly.” This is not happening... I can’t believe I’m about to be asked out by my high school bully. “Would you like to go on a date with me, Y/N?” “Yes.”

I could see his eyes light up. I guess everyone has the thing they truly want, this is his. Who knows what could come from this, but I’m willing to give it a try.

[joseimukeaddict]

Probably gonna fail a class so here are random headcanons for Izumi Tachibana from A3!

(It’s pretty long IMO and not proofread, sorry)

(I also am not caught up with the JP main story past Act 10 so sorry if anything contradicts sth that happens later)

CW: it gets kinda depressing near the end, my mood kinda seeped in 😓; mostly backstory stuff

——

- my girl is bi (more so bc I want a chance)

- her mom was always a stickler for a clean house so she’s super serious about making sure everyone does their chores, even more than Sakyo

- this one is more about Yukio and her mother but that man’s taste is women is definitely serious women in charge (they say you tend to fall for someone similar to your parents *winkwonk* SakyoIzu being the gender bent ver *winkwonk*

- Women on top tho, the men are simps (Yukio has to call at least once a week or else)

- On that note, her mom definitely holds grudges by the way she doesn’t even want Yukio to be mentioned in her household; Izumi holds mini-grudges too but they eventually fade with time bc she’s forgetful and just really nice

- not one to scream at a person when she’s angry, just raises her voice and speaks in a firm tone (she’s really good at choosing the right words though so it’s kinda worse to get her mad bc she’s usually so tolerant and her words hit deep)

- always speaks from the heart so this skill not transfer to acting 😭

- when her dad left so suddenly, she tried watching plays to cope but then started crying in the middle of the performance bc she thought of what her dad would think of a specific scene bc they used to do daddy-daughter play trips

- briefly tried to take up a different artistic hobby instead of theatre but when that failed, she just threw herself into her studies

- average student but she can get higher scores if she really tries

- scores into a pretty good college but a friend encourages her to go to a decent college that at least has a good arts program bc they’re worried Izumi is gonna throw away her life’s passion

- although she had that horrible experience where the theatre head told her she has no acting talent, at least being able to help create plays with backstage work rekindles her love of theatre and gives her an even greater appreciation for behind the scenes positions

- she works her way up the back stage ladder, trying out all sorts of different jobs to get a feel for each of them and eventually gets to an assistant director position

- and she’s absolutely in love with it (my girl is a career woman through and through)

- she gets why her father loved it so much although he was a great actor himself

- so thankful to the friend who encouraged her to go to that college, they’re still in contact (long distance bc she’s still at their home town) and they text and do late night calls often (they’re platonic soulmates dw)

- She was decently popular before daddy issues happened and lost a lot of the fair weather friends and only has a few close ones she’s made and kept over the years; she’s making more connections via theatre nowadays bc MANKAI keeps her so busy (it’s a crime that Liber doesn’t even give Izumi just one friend outside of her relation with MANKAI)

- Although MANKAI and her friend have never met, they refer to each other by nicknames at this point bc of how often Izumi catches them up on what the other is doing

- I know for a fact this girl is a praiser, she’s just so proud about them like a mother (especially when it comes to MANKAI)

- Takes almost no credit for them however, my girl has some insecurity issues being around such immensely talented people 😢

- She’s very talented in managerial aspects but she only found out after years of no talent in various arts

- She’s not one to tell people about her troubles (she knows she should) but people who know her well can tell when she needs a pick me up

- and one last happy one bc wow it got depressing and long: at least every few months, she schedules a weekend off and goes back to her hometown to spend time with her mother, after realizing that she should cherish more the family she has close by after moving into the MANKAI dorm and being reminded of family by the boys (both mother and daughter look forward to this event every time) (what do they do? Just relax and chat over Japanese snacks while her mother gives Izumi some tips on how to better run the dorm) (If you think Izumi is a praiser, her mother is worse, 1000% yaps about her wonderful daughter all the time to her friends behind Izumi’s back)

——

Sorry it was so long… too many thoughts for MANKAI’s one and only Director…

I have so many more but no one would want to read that much in one sitting. IDK Part 2 when I fail another major assignment that will cost me my grade?

[queen-mabs-revenge]

well. that was an episode of something alright.

no but truly whatever is happening is so fucking disappointing wrt the emotional journey and catharsis for these characters, and honestly i feel condescended to as an audience member and as a football fan. you can't just slap an isolated didactic speech over a heart tugging score and call it story telling, you can't take an 11th hour 180 turn while ignoring the characters for 10 episodes and call it character development, and you can't take a story of mass working-class fan protests against club owner greed and give it to a rich white lady as her slay girlboss story without it being actually gross.

sorry but this was 63 minutes...of what exactly?? just going through the story lines in some kind of vague order of least to most consequential for sam, keeley, roy, rebecca, and nate and this gets long so under the cut it goes:

sam - what was this supposed to even be? ok so you bring back edwin akufo for the superleague story (which by the way, changing this to the akufo league instead of the story's inspiration the european super league - which was proposed by white european billionaires - is some level of racism i can't even...) to do what? get some laughs in by retreading the grudge? putting sam through the ringer again for...??? what was the end result here? like i'm genuinely asking bc i don't understand what i'm supposed to get from his being all smiley and putting the nigerian national team photo in his locker? he's happy because jamie gave him a shout out and that's good enough for him? what the fuck is this even supposed to mean?

keeley - what was the purpose of any of this genuinely. the amount of time we spent with kjpr and i have no idea what keeley does, if she's good at her job, how she's built her relationships with her silent co-workers. when she was at richmond we got to see her in action and her stories brought out not only her own character but other characters we cared about. keeley has been utterly passive this season - her biggest moment of agency was hiring shandy and that was exploded and scrubbed from the narrative. everything else from jack to the leak to being defunded just happened to her and she cried about it. and now rebecca's swooping in to refund her again and genuinely what is even happening here? the conflict for her character that was set up last year was that she was experiencing success in a completely new way and she was scared she wasn't going to live up to it and the conflict between the work she felt she needed to do to live up to expectations and how that would affect other relationships in her life, especially that with roy. how was that addressed? at all? we've seen her nebulously stressed, we've been told she's working a lot without being allowed to experience what she's doing, we've seen her try and emulate both ted and rebecca without success, and what? what else? a couple of looks between her and roy? her getting picked up and put down by a vc funder both financially and personally? what kind of synthesis has she reached here???

roy - which brings us to roy. we get the 'i'm talking about my football career but actually i'm talking about my relationship with keeley' in the chelsea episode which was great because it set up a conflict for roy this season - the idea that he cuts and runs to put distance between himself and moments of vulnerability to avoid possible failure and as a result never truly engages and enjoys experiences or people in the moment. great brilliant amazing love it -- what the fuck happened. i feel like you can vaguely connect something about how his training jamie is teaching jamie not to do what he did - to actually give his emotional all to his development as a footballer instead of detaching when things were at there most frustrating with zava there. that where roy used his anger and gruffness as a mask, jamie was using his cockiness but both to the same end of detaching from a situation they felt was out of their control. but i feel like i'm carrying a lot of water with all that, and while yes there have been moments of roy being more open this season, he's for a lot of it been relegated to weird comic relief if you can even call it that? (sorry but the rope monologue and the dick string training are both fucked up and weird and went on for way too long). he pulled a ted at the press conference (and told someone else's miscarriage story hmm)? he and keeley have been kept apart for the entirety of this season so like....i don't know? what was this? a fake holiday to wedge in a scene with his sister, phoebe and jamie? an epiphany that he was a mess? that he caused damage? and he writes a letter and now everything's good roykeeley back on track? the fact that they were kept apart for the majority of the season just feels like.......was any of this actually sorted through? did we experience either of these characters interact in any way where they challenged each other in this journey? that lead up to this reconciliation? this culmination feels so unearned.

rebecca - and speaking of unearned, the entire set-up for her arc of getting the fuck over rupert and finding joy in the team without it being about someone else was there. from her rashness in swooping zava from under rupert's nose, to her yelling at ted about winning, the 'him-you-mean-them' conversation, her maniacal behaviour at half-time during the west ham game. but where was the move out of this? she met a guy on a boat? she..........what??? how have we seen her grow out of this moment? what have we seen besides this deus ex machina of....what? remembering a story about rupert's childhood and bing bang boom - oh he was just a child once too? and the end, job's a good'un? fast forwarding through the total football catharsis short-shrifted rebecca, too. if the football is the expository tool to reveal things about our characters, the idea that a strategy that puts a singular thing at the focus to the detriment of everything else is bad for football and it's bad for people is a great narrative device. but...just as we're being told and not shown that it's working on the field, we're getting the same treatment off. rebecca is realising that the community both in and around the club is more fulfilling than a psychic's quote unquote predictions and using the club as a tool for narrow-focused spite -- ok show that??? show her reactions to the fans attending training. show other small moments where she enjoys the game? puts the club above embarrassing rupert at all costs? that moment with higgins talking about possibly firing ted bc of the winless streak could have been a glimpse of that but it was thrown away instead (but to be honest, how much of that is a retreading of her journey in s1?). so what do we get instead - girlbossery with, i'm sorry, a really fucking beyond heavy-handed moment with seeing her young self in the mirror? that does what? tells us that she's able to stand firm in a room full of men? did we...not know that? that she realises she's in it bc she loves the game? does she?? again, by not seeing the moments of total football triumph, we missed out on the opportunity to show her falling in love with the sport and becoming a true fan, not just an owner. if that's even what i'm supposed to be getting from this!!?? not to mention that her big moment of realising passion for the beautiful game was more important than her spite was directly ripped from the headlines but completely twisted. as i mentioned before, in april 2021 a bunch of white european billionaire club owners did indeed try to form a european super league out of a closed group of 12 of the richest european clubs, but clear cash grab wasn't stopped by a rich white lady having a moment of #selflove and altruistic benevolence, it was stopped by a mass protest of working-class fans pointing out the clear capitalist greed of the move:

nate - and god if all of this isn't just a slap in the face to nate's character arc. again, the set up of the first two seasons was clear and great! nate's struggle with self-worth especially rooted in his inability to live up to his father's expectations; his being bullied and undervalued and then clinging to someone who was giving him the affirmations he was craving, his projecting those unresolved issues onto ted who both couldn't live up to those expectations, and who made his own mistakes as he struggled through his own personal turmoil and mental health issues. the way all of those unresolved issues and referred anger came to a head for the both of them in nate's exposing ted's panic attacks to try and hurt him the way he felt hurt. and then falling into the arms of someone who was ready to exploit nate's talent and insecurity for his own gains. it's so good! it's so fucking good that it's bananas that we barely get to see any of his reconcilation play out! we get the beginning with rupert's emotional manipulation on display...and then what? nate is sidelined for the majority of the season! he's absent in some episodes altogether! HE QUITS HIS JOB OFF SCREEN AND WE GET NONE OF HIS INNER THOUGHTS AS TO WHY EXACTLY AND WE'RE LEFT TO DO THE WORK OF FILLING IN THE BLANKS??? we get that tell-not-show moment with his family with his dad's map, but like then there's no significant interaction between nate and his father until this episode? we get most of nate's personal development through his relationship with jade instead of diving into his relationship with his parents and teasing that out to build up to the emotional cathartic moment in this episode? there's so much untapped complexity in nate's arc! that tension with his parents, how the pressures both his father as an immigrant and himself as first gen are amplified by the pressures of rigid masculinity. how his father felt the need to stifle that creative sweetness in himself to make sure nate succeeded and had the best opportunity because of the combined pressures of race, class, masculinity, and feeling out of his depths when faced with his son's brilliance. nate's conflict between expressing his own softness and creativity v his feelings of the expectations of masculinity and success. so much of that could have been drawn out instead of sidelined and then infodumped and concluded in a few minutes of one episode! look! nate plays the violin aren't you feeling emotions? so many minutes of nate laying in bed and so few of the exploration of his and his father's dynamic that was set up to be the hingepoint of his frustration, insecurity and anger that manifested in his ruptured relationship with ted and richmond! and it's back to the total football -- that jade is part of his development isn't a bad thing! showing nate as becoming fulfilled both familially and romantically is actually good, esp for a character of colour! the idea that a healthy life is a full life with many different elements of one's community playing in tandem and concert to build towards a fulfillment and joy! but like...ok??? do so that???? and not all in one moment with All The Right Words At The Same Time???? what the fuck man this feels so fucking surface level and i just with the sheer amount of minutes given to episodes this season, what the fuck were they spent on if not this???

i'm sorry, but epiphany moments like the four (four!!!) in this episode work in romcom movies because we have 90 minutes with the characters. we accept certain shorthand for character growth because we understand the constraints of the narrative framework. it's bananas and fucking lazy to think that's OK for a serial format, especially one that's ballooned in time over the past season! what the fuck have those minutes been used for except for apparently spinning the fucking wheels on all of these development arcs until the last saccharine moment? aren't you crying with emotions, hmmmm?????

none of this feels earned and i feel genuinely gross at being thrown a few Emotionally Coded scenes and being expected to have my little heartstrings pulled enough that the squandered and self-indulgent mess of this season - that threw all of this character development into the trash - doesn't matter. we've spent years with these characters, the first two seasons carefully set up deep conflicts that should have been given careful and deep resolutions.

instead this episode gives us a naked ass and insists that it's clothed in glorious tie dye.

it's a naked fucking ass. and whatever patchwork loincloth the last two episodes whip up, it can't make up for the wasted potential, laziness and self-indulgent disaster of jason sudeikis's showrunning.

[ninja-muse]

November started out bookish, because my Dad came to visit for a few days, which meant a bookstore visit, a poetry reading, and a bookish movie. It then got mundane and kind of time-dilated. If feels like October was three months ago at least and that all the books took ages to get through, which is absolutely not the case. I didn't write much, just kind of lazed around. Maybe that's it?

It was a good reading month, though! Apart from one DNF that was just not for me, I didn't read a single dud and Libby kept on coming through with anticipated reads. I not long have anything actively on hold there, and few things on hold physically at the library right now either, which hopefully means I'll be able to tackle The ARC Pile again next month and burn through a handful of those before the new year. Wish me luck?

I am well and truly going to lose most of my reading challenges this year. There's no way I'm going to hit 140 books, no way I'm going to read the remaining books on my personal "read these 50 books" challenges, and I might have hit 10 Canadian authors but I'm certainly not going to hit the stretch goal of 20. I'm mostly okay with this. Really. At least I finally passed my goal of 40,000 pages. Huzzah!

Also, as you can tell by that stack of six books, I do not have a book acquisition problem. You have a book acquisition problem! Only two of those were purchases though—I've been meaning to read The Apprenticeship of Duddy Kravitz and The Mighty Dead comes recommended. The rest of them were out of damaged shipments at work. If the publisher doesn't want them back and we don't have the space to store them, what am I meant to do? Throw them away? Salt Fat Acid Heat is totally writing research, of course.

Somehow, I suspect I'm not going to hit my goal of reading more books off my TBR shelves than I add to them this year either.

And now without further ado, in order of enjoyment…

The Water Outlaws - S.L. Huang When Lin Chong is convicted of a crime she didn’t commit, she finds herself allied with infamous outlaws.

8/10

🏳️‍🌈 secondary characters (lesbian, genderfluid), mute secondary character, 🏳️‍🌈 author

warning: death, violence, torture, blood

The Night Watch - Sarah Waters

Four Londoners after and during the War, and the melancholiness of life and love.

8.5/10

🏳️‍🌈 main characters (lesbian, bi woman), 🏳️‍🌈 secondary characters (lesbian, queer)

warning: self-harm, abortion, blood, war, suicide

Lay Them to Rest - Laurah Norton

A portrait of people solving Doe cases and their methods.

8/10

warning: missing and murdered people, human remains

Ogres - Adrian Tchaikovsky

The world is a cruel place full of powerful ogres, and you are a peasant with a grudge.

7.5/10

warning: violence, murder, classism, oppression

Turning Darkness into Light - Marie Brennan

Audrey Camherst gets the chance to translate lost Draconean texts but grows suspicious of her new employer.

7.5/10

Black British-coded main character

warning: xenophobia

The Circumference of the World - Lavie Tidhar

A pulp sci-fi novel that doesn’t exist, the real lives it affects, and the secrets of the universe.

7.5/10

albino Vanuatan main character, faceblind main character, half-Guyanese Jewish secondary character

warning: sexist, racist, and homophobic characters

Sleep No More - Seanan McGuire

October is a changeling born to serve her family, and happy in her role. Unfortunately there are people who remember her very differently.

7/10

🏳️‍🌈 secondary characters (bi men), 🏳️‍🌈 author

warning: villains really like their ideas about blood purity

The Innocent Sleep - Seanan McGuire

Tybalt’s wife has been caught in Faerie’s grandest illusion and he just wants to bring her home.

7/10

🏳️‍🌈 main character (bi man), 🏳️‍🌈 secondary characters (poly, sapphic, bi man), 🏳️‍🌈 author

warning: eugenics

DNF

Moorewood Family Rules - HelenKay Dimon

Jillian is out of prison and determined to make her con artist family go straight, no matter what.

Currently reading:

A Power Unbound - Freya Marske

Jack, Alan, and their friends must find a hidden artifact and foil a plot. Jack and Alan do not get along.

🏳️‍🌈 main characters (gay, bi), main character with injured leg and chronic pain, 🏳️‍🌈 secondary characters (gay, bi woman, lesbian), 🏳️‍🌈 author

Music from the Earliest Notations to the Sixteenth Century - Richard Taruskin A history of early written European music, in its social and political contexts.

The Penguin Complete Sherlock Holmes - Arthur Conan Doyle Victorian detective stories

major disabled character

warning: colonialism, racism

Stats

Monthly total: 8 Yearly total: 117/140 Queer books: 4 Authors of colour: 1 Books by women: 5 Authors outside the binary: 1 Canadian authors: 0 Off the TBR shelves: 1 Books hauled: 6 ARCs acquired: 2 ARCs unhauled: 2 DNFs: 1

January February March April May June July August September October

[athenaalexandria]

I’ve also been thinking about ableism in America. Did you know researchers who taught sign language to chimps didn’t actually know sign language itself. They just took floating signs and modified them for ape hands and gave this new language spoken grammar. So not only are we saying that sign language isn’t a language and not respecting it, but we are also trying to force animals to communicate our way when really we should be trying to learn how to communicate their way. Like this is why so many neurotypicals are AWFUL pet owners. They don’t listen to their pet because they refuse to learn how and so even though they may love their pet they still hurt them in a myriad of ways simply because they refuse to understand that animals aren’t people and also aren’t toys but their own unique creature with their own unique communication.

Also continuing on the ableism side, why is it that when I am so depressed I want to go on a sewer slide and have to leave work for a few months, everyone’s first question is when I’ll be back to work. Not if I’m ok, not how they can help, but when I’ll be better and can get back to labor. Also there are companies that exist purely to say “you don’t deserve this time off so we won’t be giving you your pittance to live off of while you are sick”. It’s almost as bad as health insurance.

Also, why do people always assume the worst of your words? They never give the benefit of the doubt. They find the worst possible reading of your words and go off of that. Like I express frustration around getting my ADHD meds, and I get yelled at for wanting addicts to die. Like what??? Or I want to share a fun thing I made, and I get “called out” for advertising and being a shill. Like no we were talking about TikTok, I made a TikTok I was proud of that was getting traction and wanted to share my joy, and I get shut down.

Also I hold grudges for so long. Like these things happened 2 years ago and I’m still mad about it. I have to fight off the urge to message these people to this day. I blame being a Pisces because I’m hilarious.

I’ve been failed by nearly everyone in my life so consistently and egregiously that I don’t think I will ever be able to live a normal life. I am forever dealing with the consequences of other people’s choices on how they treated me, and that hurts more than the original acts themselves. Cutting off contact with parents cut my souls into ribbons. My “friends” only spending time with me out of pity cracked my mind. The crushing loneliness broke my body. And I was only 10. I’m a shriveled version of what I could have been. I don’t dislike who I have become, but I will never be thankful for the pain I’ve been through. Trauma doesn’t have silver linings, damage isn’t good, it’s just pain. You could have been who you are now with no hurt.

Anyways I’m really high, and I’ve been battling the realization that I might have DID or OSDD or something and I’ve been feeling a lot of emotions especially since I’m back on my HRT again. Not sure what this is but honestly I’m using tumblr as a diary at this point and that’s ok with me. I like the idea that nobody sees these posts so I can vent with the chance that maybe one day someone will stumble upon my blog diary thing as like an archeological find. Like oh wow here’s some ancient writings from a transgender lesbian with chronic pain and many mental disabilities! What a rare find!

Oh also I meant to bring up therapy is great but you have to show your cracks so they can put bandaids on and teach you the exercises to heal the breaks.

Plagiarism is bad, I’m sleepy? Goodnight

[emeraldbabygirl]

I feel like we need a shaman, not a priest but a shaman to come out here and bless the property. Not everyone around us even tho the land around us belonged to my mum’s relatives but those relatives are either dead and an assholes lives on their land or they’re moving or have moved. Like this land was ours, so many of the properties were given to my mum and her siblings or cousins as gifts on their 21st birthday and it’s all since been sold. We were the first once out here, we were out here when it was all just trees except my mum’s uncle’s house which got torn down and all the debris was pushed into our yard and what is now Bob’s yard and no I don’t care about privacy for assholes I will call them by their name as they deserve to be called out idc but then they built a house and the past two neighbors that have lived in the house behind us are putting us through hell. I believe the spirit of my mum’s uncle or the land was haunted and it’s possessed the bitch out back. I am being serious cause she was nice to us for 13 years but Bob fed her lies about who knows what and she believed them and faked being nice to us which pisses me off. Anyway I feel like the property, the last one in the family needs to be cleansed while we still have it like Bob is threatening to cut my bedroom out to put up his fence after he already took our yard the first time and now he’s threatening to do it again as if it was our fault the contractor fucked up the property lines and now we are suffering from all around us. Literally the whole neighborhood the whole street and down the block are on Suzy q’s side and it’s fucked up cause she started it and now she’s dragging neighbors into it when it ain’t none of their damn business. I just want the negative energy in the house on property to go away and cleanse out 10 feet of the drive that is our property but because of the idiots that lived behind us before they tricked my mum into a stupid easement and this bitch is telling everyone the whole shared driveway is hers so her and all her stupid friends go 80 down it and they park on our property and do what they want cause she said they could because she thinks she can do whatever she wants and say whatever and everyone around here believes her a backs her up. I think she’s evil and possessed by the Lawson’s the people that moved in behind us after us. We were here first and our property and home is being threatened by people who came way after us. Bob will never understand how expensive it would be to move the house, which is a mobile home on a concrete foundation, and the property line. We’d have to uproot the septic and all kinds of shit. He wants to move but “can’t because of the property line” which is bullshit he could literally pack up his shit and leave and I wish him and Suzanne fucking would but everyone loves her cause she’s the cake lady who poisons people’s food and can’t cook or do anything for herself and blah blah blah I hate our neighbors. Who the fuck threatens someone over something we had nothing to do with and Bob is still holding a grudge against shit my father caused when he hasn’t even been here for 10 fucking years like touchy much?

Long story short I want someone to come bless and cleanse the house and property. If we were rich I’d buy them both out and tear down the houses and have it be all land and surround by one big fence all around the three properties. Or just keep the houses and cleanse the properties and my siblings could live in the houses, there’s a lot of possibilities but we are poor and we might, I might lose my bedroom “if we can’t be nice to suzannne” which is bullshit cause she’s not nice to us. I’m still so pissed off about this whole situation I just want her and Bob gone and we can get some real neighbors who act neighborly.

Anyway just a rant cause idk I can’t sleep and I want to go outside when they sleep and bang pots and pans together cause they make noises when my siblings and I try to sleep. They’re so disgusting and disrespectful and mean and ugh and UGH I HATE THEM. At least my father fucked off and left us alone after awhile, she can’t even do that she keeps harassing us and always films us when we’re on our own property like she literally sent us this nasty text after she yelled at us cause we told her her friends can’t park on our property and she needs to stop feeding my dogs

She also pried the wires in the fence open so she could feed my dogs and that’s why they never ate and I couldn’t put them in the pen at night cause they were all riled up and shit. And the driveway again is literally 30 feet hers and 10 feet ours and if she wants to do anything to it like putting gravel like she just did she HAS to ask us first and she fucking didn’t cause she thinks the whole driveway is hers. All because we told her no twice she’s been an absolute cunt because she’s so used to everyone kissing her ass. Bob’s so far up her ass he’s kissing the back of her tongue. I just hate that she thinks she can be mean and and cunt to us and then everyone else believes she’s wouldn’t hurt and fly. She would literally shoot a fly she’s crazy and now she’s got everyone in the neighborhood on her side even tho she’s fucking wrong ugh. Sorry for the rant this has been bothering me for a week. I think she needs an exorcism or the looney bin tbh

[13thdoctorposts]

Thinking about what you were saying about 12; I try to be cautious of the fact that 12 was hated for a long time but even now he's definitely gaining popularity and there's people who love his era but spout off this nonsense about 13. And sometimes all I can think about is how much hate 13 would get for saying the same things as him. Remember when bill was concerned about missy literally being a mass murderer and he implied Bill is just as bad bc she eats meat? Can you imagine how much hate 13 would get for that 😭 and its the same in other eras, 13 would never get away with half the crap that was said to mickey, or making fun of Jackie supposedly being old, or abandoning jack, or yelling at Clara etc

I love 12 because he felt more alien to me than the previous Doctors, but you never hear discourse about his behaviour or the things he said. I like each Doctor being a bit different, its far more interesting that way, and if sometimes they are a bit of an asshole thats fine too, but it has to be fine for all of them not just the male Doctors.

All they talk about is how much they love a couple of his big speeches, but for 13, 6 years on they are still complaining about episodes from series 11 claiming they make her a terrible person. But what 7 years on theres nothing to complain about with 12?

Please we all know there is if you wanted to hold a grudge but we know it's a TV show somethings in an episode aren't great and we move on. Unless you're anti 13 then you never move on and have to make sure anyone who's watched the show knows how bad of a Doctor 13 is and anyone who goes to watch it for the first time you try to ruin their experience and make sure they see all the bad before they have watched it. But they don't do that with any of the other Doctors even though you could.

When it comes to polls these days 12's eps somehow now after all the hate when it aired are supposedly the greatest episodes of Who ever written, and he's one of the best Doctors... which is fine but it also doesn't feel genuine since they weren't saying that at the time. It feels more like a a rebuke of 13 more than a love of 12 a lot of the time, and why? because at least he was still a male Doctor.

I have read more times than I cant count... Doctor Who died at the end of series 10... Why? You hated the 12th Doctors run when it aired... now you hate the 13th Doctors run,,, but somehow 12 is still a legitimate Doctor and 13 doesn't count? Please that shit is just misogyny.

And thats not even going back further through NuWho... the 9th, 10th and 11th Doctors runs also had questionable episodes, questionable morals at times, and a lot of questionable lines of dialogue.

[saberghatz]

1-70

OH MY GODODOD CRACKING MY KNUCKLES

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? YES PRETTY GOOD!!

02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? My friends :')

03: Do you regret anything? Like a billion things that I won't get into here >:)

04: Are you insecure? Only on Fridays

05: What is your relationship status? SINGLE YEAAA BOIEEIEEEE

06: How do you want to die? In my sleep would be the most ideal tbh I'm down for that

07: What did you last eat? Ritz crackers and peanut butter;;.....

08: Played any sports? IN MY LIFE? YEA!! RECENTLY? UHHHHHHhhhhhhhhh

I hate playing on teams so I usually just fuck about on my own or with friends, you'll never catch me joining like actual sports teams again

09: Do you bite your nails? Surprisingly no o-o

10: When was your last physical fight? Too long ago. I'm really itching. SOMEONE PLEASE SPAR WITH ME

11: Do you like someone? I WISH I DID. FUCK.

12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? HEEELL NAW I'M LIKE A GRANDMA WHEN IT COMES TO GOING TO BED EARLY (against my will, i am simply a tired bitch)

13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? Everyone except the people I don't hate

14: Do you miss someone? Deeply :D

15: Have any pets? I don't have any personally, but my mom has two kitties named Nikki and Tessie. When I go visit her, I get to see them too. She had them since before I moved away, so I still consider them kind of my cats :')

16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? Lonely enough to do this, but also happy enough to do this

17: Ever made out in the bathroom? I thought this said 'have you ever made it out of the bathroom' and I'm like honestly no my ibs could never

On that note, no but call me

18: Are you scared of spiders? No :(

19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? I'd go back to a time before I was born, definitely the 70s or 80s just to experience it for awhile.

But if I was limited to only going back in time during the years I was alive, no I would never go back. I feel like I've learned a lot over the years and I don't want to lose that progress

20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? Probably the airport

21: What are your plans for this weekend? MY ROOMMATE BLAIR HAS A CHOW CHOW PUPPY AND WE'RE TAKING HER TO A DOGGIE SOCIAL ON SATURDAY. Also maybe going to an art show/mall on Sunday.

22: Do you want to have kids? How many? Zero, have you seen the state of the world??

23: Do you have piercings? How many? I have ear piercings, but I think they closed up :// I REGRET LETTING THEM CLOSE

24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? Like in school? That's a lifetime ago oh god Science

25: Do you miss anyone from your past? Yes almost everybody I've ever known, whether it ended on good or bad terms. I am simply a sentimental soul with a horrible memory

26: What are you craving right now? Making out with a stranger that I know

27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? @_@;;;.... yea

28: Have you ever been cheated on? No

29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? PROBABLY, I'M SORRY IF SO

30: What’s irritating you right now? Social media is grating on my fucking nerves, so much so that I'm weening off insta and twitter and I've ended up back here. Right here.

31: Does somebody love you? If so lemme know

32: What is your favourite color? Pink, white, gold

33: Do you have trust issues? Fortunately not

34: Who/what was your last dream about? I think I dreamed I was Percy Jackson and I was befriending some monsters instead of killing them.

35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? My roommate like literally yesterday :D

36: Do you give out second chances too easily? I'd give anyone a second chance, but I don't think I'd give a third chance.

37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? I forgive because I don't hold grudges and then my memory is so rotten that I forget why I was mad in the first place

38: Is this year the best year of your life? ITS BARELY 2024 SO I CAN'T ANSWER YET

39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 16 I think. Shout out to Solangelo

40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? No but this made me realize I never have, and now I want to

51: Favourite food? I can't think of anything, so like I do at restaurant menus I'll default to chicken strips :)

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? Yes 100%

53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? shower, work on writing my fics, jerk off, draw, you decide what order

54: Is cheating ever okay? Never, unless your partner knows but then its not chEATING IS IT

55: Are you mean? Honestly maybe

56: How many people have you fist fought? Not enough (none. please. please spar with me I need to train)

57: Do you believe in true love? I believe some people believe in it and can find that for themselves. I hope I become one of them

58: Favourite weather? If I can't wear a bikini, I'm sad. But crisp Autumn mornings also hit like no other..

59: Do you like the snow? I love visiting the snow, I wouldn't want to live in the snow

60: Do you wanna get married? I haven't really thought about it lately. So currently, I guess not xD

61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? Hell yea, but turn up the heat

62: What makes you happy? @hyenahijinks @yuuidflourite @comets-nix and drawing

63: Would you change your name? Some people call me Grace which I like a lot, it's my middle name tho

64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? I'd totally do it, but I'd probably get that fist fight I've been begging for instead

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? Been there done that, we over it and stronger than ever >:)

66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? @hyenahijinks ILY bitch

67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? @hyenahijinks

68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? LOL MY MOM TODAY ACTUALLY

69: Do you believe in soulmates? ARE TRUE LOVE AND SOULMATES NOT THE SAME THING

70: Is there anyone you would die for? My friends and parents 100% but I'm also not like super attached to breathing to begin with so the decision would be very easy

THATS A HELL OF A WAY TO END AN ASK MEME THANK YOU FOR ASKING THESE HUMPHREY

[sparklywatercolors]

I think I have come to realize why I hoard notebooks.

So when I was like 12 my mom came in my room and threw out my 8 notebook long story that I spent all summer on when I wasn't swimming or I was stuck at my grandma's.

I don't know why she did that I think it's cause she saw me write the word "crap"

She tells me she never threw them out and for years I've been asking for them back and she fails to deliver. Just like she fails to respect me. 😗

She wonders why I don't let her read my writing or go through my sketchbook.

My stories now I have to label as Diary cause that's the only thing she won't touch. Which wow, that is actually impressive wow.

It really hurt that she did that to me. But if I mention that she hurt me she's like oh stop holding a grudge I was working nightshift.

Idk mom the minute I turned 10 you hated me. You threw a fucking knife at my direction while I was doing my homework and you wondered why I stopped doing homework at home and instead did it at our neighbor's house while sitting on her porch, or in between classes, lunch periods , etc.

I can't wait to leave and never talk to you or dad ever again. You guys pushed me away.

You couldn't even protect me from your mother but you play the martyr act of I love my children I protect them.

Bullshit.

But I think my inner child wants control of something so they chose notebooks. Is it annoying at times, yes. But do I feel more relaxed around notebooks than I do people? Yes.

I know it's not great to have so many but it helps.

[purplesurveys]

1749

How old were you 10 years ago? I was 15.

The last time you went out to eat, where did you go? I already talked about it in detail in a previous survey but my workmates and I went to a wine bar for Trina's despedida. We went to a nearby bar after for more filling bar chow cos all they had in the first place were light finger food meant to be paired with wine.

What did you order? For the wine bar, we got a few bottles of wine, clams, a cheese plate, and fries; for the bar, we had chips, sisig, and mac and cheese balls.

Think of the last film you watched. Who was your favourite character? I can't remember the last movie I saw because I rarely watch any anymore; but the last anything I watched was Prison Playbook. I'm only one episode in, but my favorite has been the sweet dude who was part of the same inmate batch as the main character. Least suspicious character so far, and it helps to know that his reason for getting incarcerated was merely because he didn't pay back the loan for his mom's surgery.

Do you use Twitter? How about Tumblr? I do use both, although I'm much more active on Twitter because all I do here is take surveys on weekends and the occasional weeknight.

What colour are the walls of the room you’re in? They're white.

What would you like to say to the last person that hurt you? I have not felt hurt by my loved ones for a very long time now. That feels pretty great to realize!

When was the last time you felt disappointed? Who/what cheered you up? I was soooo bummed last Friday – I had booked a visit to a museum, but I didn't expect the traffic to be absolutely awful (it was mid-afternoon, when roads would be relatively more relaxed) that I got to my destination 40 minutes after my reserved slot. It was also the last timeslot for the day, so it wasn't like I could just join the next batch of visitors.

I figured it'd be stupid of me to even show up lol, so I just went to the food hall next door, which also ended up sucking because there was no cell signal inside; I couldn't even use my data. At least I got a delicious spicy tuna poke from my visit.

Do you have a friend whose name starts with ‘L’? Describe him/her. There's Lea and Leigh. Lea is SUPER friendly, I love love love having conversations with her so it's a shame we see each other so rarely; I also see her as headstrong, ambitious, and intelligent. Leigh is creative, gentle, and a really talented singer.

When you opened your eyes this morning, what were your first thoughts? Holy shit I suck at waking up, I must have missed Jungkook's set at the Global Citizen Festival and I hate myself. Then I checked my Twitter (it was 7 AM by that point; they advertised the set as starting at 4 AM, Manila time) and apparently he was still in the middle of doing Seven LOL. Man did his set three hours late so I got to still hang out with him for a few minutes AND see the teaser for 3D!!!

Have you received any compliments today? Nah.

Describe one of your favourite items of clothing. Where did you get it? My brown sleeveless maxi dress - just Shopee, haha.

Name one of your favourite foods that starts with the letter A. Arancini.

Is there anyone from your past that you sometimes miss? Tell me about them. Only people I can think are Sofie and my grandpa. Sofie was my best friend in high school and we were each other's biggest confidantes. She was born overseas but since her parents were incapable of raising her and were separated, she was sent back here from childhood, and that's how she ended up in my school by around Grade 7. She had hair as thick as mine, loved makeup, and got me into Audrey Hepburn. We grew apart in college and saw each other a grand time of Once before she migrated to the UK this time last year. Our relationship post-drifting-apart has been wholesome and there's been absolutely no grudge or bad blood or whatever. I was raised around my grandpa routinely telling me random trivia and general knowledge, and I think I got my love from learning from him. He is a gifted writer and he apparently used to write my grandmother poems when they were younger, and is into history. If there is one thing he can't handle well, it's alcohol, and I have my fair share of trauma from what I've seen of him when he has had too much to drink. Nevertheless I think of him fondly, especially for the person he was without his brandy. He died in 2015 from a sudden heart attack when he was visiting family from our province.

How long have you known the last person you text messaged? Since 2020.

Do you know what the person you miss is doing at this moment? Probably on his lunch break.

Has anyone told you that they love you today? Yes.

In the last week, what’s the kindest thing that someone has done for you? My sister making me instant noodles when I asked her.

Is there a song that makes you cry every time you hear it? We Are Bulletproof: The Eternal has been a little rougher to listen to these days. So has Love Letters.

If someone read your mind right now, what would they hear? They would hear remnants of Le Sserafim's Fire In the Belly because I can't stop thinking about it lmao.

Do you have any favourite jewellery that you wear every day? Yes, my purple heart charm necklace that Reena gave me.

What colour are the eyes of the last male you talked to? Dark brown.

Are you wearing anything orange or red? Yes.

Who was the last person you said “hello” to? Idk, I think my sister.

I like to think there is always something to smile about…so, tell me, what’s your reason to smile right now? News about my potential resignation has apparently spread at work so I'm just happy that I'm not bearing it on my own anymore. They know I have plans to leave and they know I'm not too thrilled with my promotion, so at least I don't have to worry about violent reactions when the timing is finally right to step back and step out.

Also, Jungkook new single on Friday.

[toastess-with-the-mostess]

For the ship questions post, I have two ships. Firstly, 4 and 6 for pre-relationship, 2 for general, and 10 for love, for Panya, because *obviously*

And the second one is just 1, 4, and 5 for general for the crack ship Larmina and Zora (I just picked randomly which drule twin to use lol)

you fell into my trap and now you are stuck listening to my panya rambling YOU FOOL This got super long lol, stuff is under the cut Here's the post we're referencing

Yellow for Panya, Purple for Larmina/Zora

Pre-Relationship

4. Who felt romantic feelings first? Anya did! It was two years after they reconnected on Arus and right before the team got split up because of Wade. She never said anything because she was scarred she'd lose the special closeness they had, and because Pidge was crushing on Lance at the time lol

His crush ends after The Incident, since Pidge dedicated himself to getting back black lion, and Anya's crush takes a back burner while she makes sure Allura doesn't turn into a vegetable because of her depression. Around three years later, though, Pidge starts crushing on her in turn because she had come to visit them on Earth instead of Allura (she got dragged into royal business) during the holidays. Something about Anya laughing with the streetlights reflecting off her eyes and the snow that reminded him of home really got to him. Likewise, seeing Pidge still have so much life in him and his general excitement to have her near again brought that crush back into focus for Anya. Neither of them would act on it until like another 3 years though

6. If you had told one of them that the other would be their soulmate, what would they think? Pidge would brush it off, he doesn't believe in destiny or ghosts or anything mystical that's part of a greater force. Anya already believes they're soulmates, but not in the romantic sense. Soulmates to her are just people who are meant to keep crossing each other's path, and that has happened at least 3 times with Pidge

General

2. Did they have an official first date? If so, what was it like? No official first date, as in they went out somewhere, but what they consider their first date is when they both spent a bunch of time together in the Royal Archives. Only Arusian royalty and their advisors are allowed in, so Coran gave Anya a key for the door, and Pidge has snuck in there a lot before because he's not going to be kept from information period. It'd had been a long day for them both and the two wanted to spend some alone time together, so they agreed to meet in the archive, where almost nobody else was allowed in. Inside the archive was a nook hidden by the ceiling tall bookcases, it had a small couch with a lamp and coffee table. Neither of them knows who set it up, but they brought over some blankets and electric kettle and mugs just to sit and cuddle with each other. And that was how they liked it, a moment of peace together doing whatever they wanted in each other's presence

1. Who initiated the relationship, and how did it go? It was probably Zora tbh LMAOO Larmina holds grudges for a LOOONG time, and she wasn't over their joyride in the city, especially because as royalty they should know better. Eventually they do play nice and Zora has liked Larmina's spark from the start, so she just bluntly asks her out. Larmina takes it as a challenge almost, she doesn't see it as a fun time, but they end up getting along great and agree to keep seeing each other.

The Twins aren't actually evil in my eyes, I like to think they're spies who work with Lotor and feed the info back to the rest of the Drule Empire, which had kicked out the 9th kingdom (Lotor's kingdom) after dotu.

4. Were they each other’s first anything (kiss, relationship, etc.)? Larmina's first relationship, but not Zora's anything. I see them both as minors, so I'm not going much farther than that, but Larmina now fully understands why her aunt is so attached to the idea of someone really loving her in their relationship

5. What’s their height difference? Age difference? In the comics they look to be the same height, but I've always hc'd that the ladies of the team to be taller than their respective group (except Anya she got the short end of the stick, literally) Larmina is taller than Zora but actually younger than her. In dotu I know they gave the Drule's ages that go into the centuries, but I can't see that without some serious physical changes, so the twins are about as young as the cadets (Zora 19-20, Larmina 18)

Love

10. Do they prefer verbal or physical affection? This is actually kind of tough, at least for Pidge Anya prefers physical affection, she wasn't given a lot of verbal affection before either, but something about feeling the touch and warmth of another person makes her feel so happy For Pidge I guess he's the same, he's probably used to getting told how smart he is and things related to that because of his genius. When he gets physical affection though, it surprises him, it's really only Hunk Lance and Allura that are physically affectionate with him, so now that Anya is getting a lot more touchy as his partner it's like he can't get enough. Even if they're in the same room doing separate things, one of their limbs has to touch somehow or else he'll get dramatic. Truthfully, it's because of his last relationship that ended abruptly and horribly, her touch reminds him that she isn't going anywhere, especially after he let himself romantically care for and get into a relationship with someone again.