#but I hope ya’ll like!! thanks to anyone who read it all the way through

[harryspet]

well kept [epilogue] r. cameron

[warnings] dark!ceo!rafe x reader, size difference, billionaire!older!rafe, shy!reader with low self-esteem, reader is a person who stutters, boss x personal assistant, heavy abuse of power, kidnapping, NONCON/DUBCON, emotional/mental manipulation, little editing, READ AT YOUR OWN RISK 18+

A/N: a little wrapup of the story!

word count: 3.7k

In which you begin to question whether submission is the only escape.

well kept masterlist

8 months later …

Monotonously, you brought a wet rag across the large, rough-hewn wooden dining table that dominates the space of the dining room. It took you nearly thirty minutes to clean it thoroughly, wiping away every speck of dust before meticulously arranging the plates, napkins, and glassware with care, making sure everything was just as it should be.

It’s perfect when you get done. With a soft sigh, you flick off the chandelier of large glass lanterns, letting the natural light filter in through the tall windows, casting a gentle, golden glow across the room. You turn toward the kitchen, pulling off your cleaning gloves, ready to move on with your routine.

Then the doorbell rang.

You make your way through the downstairs of the expansive cabin, towards the front entrance. Glancing through the floor-to-ceiling windows as you make your way to the front door, you spot the culprit: a gray van parked down by the lake road. The sight feels out of place, a reminder of the outside world you rarely encounter.

Unlocking the front door, you huff as you pull the large piece of solid wood open. It always feels like it weighs a thousand pounds though you can’t recall Rafe ever having any difficulty with it. Still catching your breath, you greet the grocery delivery man, Connor, with a small smile. Before you, four-hundred dollars worth of groceries sits in plastic bags and you place a hand on your hips as you examine the challenge before you. 

“Let me help you carry them inside,” Connor offers kindly but you’re already shaking your head, “Mr. Cameron always tips so well, really, it’s the least I could do.”

“N-No worries, this is mmm-my workout for the day,” You reply, momentarily, taking in the fact that this was one of the few contacts you had with the outside world. Truthfully, Rafe had never explicitly said that Connor wasn’t allowed to carry the grocering inside but everytime you imagined Rafe coming down the stairs and spotting the two of you together.  If the young man wanted to keep receiving handsome tips from Mr. Cameron, he’d keep his interactions with you brief.

“Okay,” He seemed to shrug, confused, “I never see you in town … you work from home too?”

“Yeah,” You lie without hesitation, voice steady, “We’re just … homebodies.”

“What do you do for work? … Sorry if that’s intrusive. It’s just … this house is insane. You guys must be loaded.”

You laugh, and Connor shifts on his feet, smiling shyly back at you. To anyone else, the house in all it’s grandeur and isolation, must seem like a dream come true, “I help manage some stuff for Mr. Cameron’s business. I just help out where I can.” You hope it’s enough to end the conversation.

He still looks impressed, gaze wandering back to the cabin’s towering windows. As the silence stretches, you grab a few bags from the ground. He doesn’t immediately notice your discomfort, “I get it,” He adds, “Ya’ll are living the dream up here. Away from all the craziness.”

“Something like that,” You keep your face neutral until it falters. The slightest creak of floorboards from upstairs. Your heart skips a beat and you force yourself to grab a few more bags of groceries, “Well, I should get the ice cream inside before it melts. Thanks again, Connor.”

“I’ll get out of your hair, Mrs. Cameron,” He replied, though there’s a flicker of curiosity in his eyes, “See in you two weeks. Take care, alright?”

You nod silently, turning on your heels, determined to keep your focus on the task at hand. The rhythmic thud of footsteps descending the stairs grows louder, but you force yourself to keep moving, your eyes locked on the kitchen ahead. With a small grunt, you heave the bags onto the kitchen island, the plastic crinkling as you place them down.

Just as you spin around to grab the rest of the groceries, you collide hard with a solid wall of muscle, Rafe’s chest, unyielding like a brick wall. The sudden impact knocks the breath from your lungs, and you stagger slightly, instinctively looking up to meet his piercing gaze.

“Everything okay?” He asks, most likely taking in your wild eyes. 

Wearing a button-up checkered shirt that tucked into well-fitted trousers, you assumed he’d been taking some video calls and wanted to look presentable. 

“Yeah … groceries,” You said, gesturing to the kitchen island, “Uhm, C-Connor just dropped them off.”

“That kid knows how to linger, huh?” Rafe placed his hands in his pocket, tongue poking at his gums as he thought something over. 

Kid. Rafe was probably only a handful of years older than him. “He’s just doing his job,” you said quietly, your heart racing as you busied yourself with the grocery bags, hoping to avoid further scrutiny. Rafe followed closely behind, a silent reminder of his constant presence, his need to control even the smallest interactions.

It wasn’t like Rafe was resistant to helping around the house. He cleaned after himself for the most part. Honestly, you’d expected just being a house wife to be easier than being a personal assistant, especially easier than being a barista. However, Rafe’s mountain estate was enormous, and Rafe decided against keeping the full staff he had at his Charlotte mansion. It was like he wanted you to handle all of it, to be completely busy, and maybe you wouldn’t get any ideas about wanting more for your life. 

He hadn’t realized that you stopped wanting more for your life when you woke up, drugged from whatever he had slipped you, and found him tucked between your legs, mouth wet from tasting you. The memory hit you as you leaned down to grab the next load of grocery bags. 

Not able to separate you dreams from reality, you weren’t immediately sure whether Rafe was really in between your thighs. Eyelids heavy, only your mouth opened, a strangled moan left your lips. Lifting your head, you looked down with blurry, hooded vision. You never slept in anything silk yet underneath your fingertips you could feel the fabric covering your chest. Your right thigh was hooked high over your hip, Rafe’s hand firm in the crook of your knee, holding your leg in place as he kept you open. 

Even in your weakest state, his touch was commanding, and controlling. You were barely awake and the pressure he was creating didn’t fully register until you were close, the orgasm fully bringing you to consciousness. 

Reality came crashing donw like it always did when you woke in the morning. Your life wasn’t your own anymore. Usually, you’d at least have a moment alone, a moment that was still yours before you were back on his routine. But now, even sleep seemed like a choice you no longer controlled, another thing he had taken from you.

You started to register your own breathing, the way your chest rose and fell rapidly, just as he crawled on top of you. Shirtless, his eyes still sleepy but focused enough on the task at hand. He easily pushed inside of you, and as your breathing calmed and you came down from your orgasm, he pressed his chest into yours. Your noses touched together as he sheathed himself inside you further, “You’re getting so good,” He murmured, voice smooth and full of praise, “Taking all of me. Squeezing me so tight.”

You had no choice but to meet his gaze, your eyes locking with his, accepting the intimacy forced upon you.You wouldn’t cry this time, you’d remain stoic, and numb. Mentally, you could try to feel nothing, no matter that you felt him across every nerve on your skin. His praise hung in the air, and his presence consume you. 

It occurred to you then that you had no idea how you’d gotten here. Sure, you knew the mistakes you’d made that led up to this point. You knew the lengths Rafe was willing to go to, the power he was willing to yield, lives he was willing to ruin. 

You turned your head to look around the room just as Rafe settled into the side of your neck, leaving a trail of kisses along your skin. Your lips parted to yelp at each deep stroke, each time he pushed against your cervix, but your eyes darted around the space. You’d been here before, your crotch pressed against a pillow, when Rafe forced you for the first time to make yourself orgasm. 

Usually, Rafe was relentless. But as soon as you could put together that you were in his house with no idea how you’d gotten there, his thrusts became sloppier, rushed, and he nestled against the side of your face. His lips brushed your ear, his breath uneven as he spilled inside of you. The intimacy of the moment felt strange, almost out of place, as if he was in a hurry to finish before you fully pieced together what was happening. His weight sagged against you, and for a moment, the room felt suffocating. 

He collapsed beside you, though he kept an arm draped over your stomach. Slowly, you lowered your leg until you were laying straight. 

You didn’t dare move. 

Rafe’s hand brushed against yours and you turned your head quickly to see a concerned look on his face, “Here, let me do it,” You felt that numbness that had been clouding you ever since you realized you controlled nothing. He easily procured the bag from your grip and you watched as he easily took the rest of the bags into his arms. 

When you both retreated back inside, you heaved the massive front door shut again, locking yourself back into your gilded cage. Surprisingly, he helped you unpack the groceries. It would’ve been faster to do on your own, you had to direct him a few times about whether certain items belonged in the fridge or pantry but you tried to be thankful for the help. 

You were putting up the canned goods in the grocery, neatly stacking them on the shelves of the bedroom-sized pantry, when you felt his eyes still watching you, “He sure does talk a lot though, doesn’t he?”

Better not to use his name, “The grocery guy?” You swallowed, speaking slowly in order to keep your voice steady. 

“Connor,” He said, voice dripping in malice. 

“He’s j-j-just being friendly,” You said, trying to diffuse the tension.

“Friendly,” He repeated, his tone mocking, “... You know, I don’t like him talking to you.”

“I-I didn’t encourage it,” You said softly, knowing whatever words you had would be a mistake, “If you don’t like him …I-I c-c-could g-g-go to the store from now on.” 

For a long moment, Rafe didn’t respond, and you found yourself just trying to maintain your composure, canned goods forgotten in your hands, as you waited for his verdict. 

“What do you want me to say, sweetheart?”

You were forcing his hand, asking for too much when you knew he couldn’t give it to you, “Thh-Thhh-That you’ll think about it?” 

Lately, you’d been testing his boundaries. Not answering everytime he called. And when you did answer, your tone was flat and indifferent. Wearing clothes from your wardrobe you knew he’d deem unflattering. Yoga pants or shorts were okay, never sweatpants. He wanted to see your every curve. Every inch of what he believed belonged to him. You were his wife after all, he’d paid a handsome price to get you here. 

Your obedience occurred in waves. A few weeks on and a few weeks off. It was the best way your brain could cope with the control. He’d grow happy, content with your behavior and that’s when you decided to flip a switch. Sometimes, Rafe was almost reluctant to punish you. 

A thought crossed your mind. A way to gain a small ounce of control. Though it came at the high cost of satisfying his urges. You decided to beg. He loved to hear you grovel and degrade yourself. It’s one of the only ways he gets himself off.

“Please,” You whispered, your voice trembling. In your baggy flannel and sweatpants, braids tied back in a messy bun, you stepped forward. You wanted to sound weak. Even weaker than your stammer usually made you sound, “I’ll go with a bodyguard. I-I’ll wear my ring. I won’t t-t-talk to anyone.”

It surprised him. You saw it in the way he shifted on his feet and his head tilted to the side curiously. It was in the way he watched you carefully, his eyes narrowing in suspicion. The words were poison on your tongue but it didn’t stop them from filling out. 

“Is that right?” His voice was low and dangerous, how it usually was when he was calculating a devious plan in his mind. 

When the silence decided to stretch again, you filled it, “I’ll be better. I-I know I–I-I’ve been dissapointing you,” You closed the distance until you were inches from him, letting him look down at you, as you turned your eyes downcast. 

“Hmm,” You felt his hand raise and press into the side of your neck, large thumb caressing your jaw, “Then you know that’s the kind of privilege like that you’ll have to work towards?” 

Being trapped here with him felt like you’d fallen to the bottom of the totem pole. Somehow being his assistant, hanging on his arm like arm candy, and keeping his cock warm underneath his desk was better than what you were now. At least then you could see your friends. You could interact with people other than Rafe, Topper and Eleanor. Then you had a job. You were a real human.

“Yes,” You began, “I’ll d-do anything.”

Rafe’s eyes turned down as you reached one of your hands into the waistband of your sweatpants and then beneath the fabric of your underwear. 

“Y/N…” His voice deepened and you looked up at him with big, wanting eyes. 

“Can I please touch myself, Sir?” You asked, “I-I want to shhh-shhhow you how good I can be.”

He kept as still as he could. His eyes were answering your question. He didn’t need to verbally give you permission.Maybe he stayed silent because if he spoke, the desperation in his voice might betray him. Rafe didn’t need his own release in that moment—what he craved more was the sight of you undone, vulnerable, completely under his control. Watching you touch yourself, watching your eyes roll back in pleasure, was enough to satisfy him. 

You bit down on your lip, moving your fingers over your soft folds. Gently, you rubbed yourself, teasing yourself. His gaze didn’t waver, but you saw the the way his nose flared, as he tried to keep his composure. 

“Please,” A soft moan escaped your lips as you worked yourself up, the motions becoming smoother as you grew wetter, “P-Please, Sir?”

Rafe inhaled sharply and watched as you reached further, towards your aching hole. He couldn’t see it exactly but you showed him with your eyes, with your parted lips and soft expression, that you dipped a finger inside of your aching hole. 

Despite how you feared him, how he’d ruined your life, you couldn’t help but enjoy the twisted way that you could control him. The tension in the room was thick and you saw the way he was fighting against exerting his control over you, over taking over. Even in a small way, you could make him bend to your will, you saw it in the way his fist clenched at his side. 

Your pace quickened in a way that brought you closer to the edge, the friction sending waves of pleasure over your skin. 

He reached out suddenly, grabbing ahold of your arm, his grip strong but not painful. He pulled your fingers away from underneath your waistband, “You don’t get to finish until I say so,” he murmured, his voice low and authoritative. You kept your expression neutral, though every muscle in your face tensed with the effort to hide your frustration, resisting the urge to press your lips into a thin line, “Take off your clothes for me, sweetheart.”

Your body frustrated, you hurriedly pulled down your sweatpants, exposing your lacy black underwear. Next, you removed the flannel, Rafe’s eyes fixed on your newly exposed skin. You would never admit it, but deep down, you always felt comforted by the fact that never seemed to bore of seeing you. Though you’d never had a traditional honeymoon period, now that you’d lived together for so long, you thought he might lose interest at some point. Everytime he saw you it was like he was seeing you for the first time. 

Every glance he gave you was filled with that same insatiable desire, as though you were still something to unravel. The thought made something flicker inside you, a mixture of fear, and something far more complicated.

You hesitated when it came to your bra and underwear, suddenly hyperaware that Rafe was fully clothed. There he stood in his work attire and part of you wanted to hold onto those inches of fabric, “All of your clothes,” Rafe added, sensing your hesitance, and he didn’t let you stall any longer. You yelped when he grabbed you by the waist, swinging your body onto the cold, marble countertop of the kitchen island. Determined, his fingers pried your underwear down your thighs and you watched them fall to the floor. Your thin bralette was next, and you raised your arms obediently, letting him tug it over your head. 

As soon as you were bare and freezing, Rafe’s lips curled into a devious smirk, “Finish,” He said, “Go ahead, sweetheart.”

His eyes were dark and hungry, watching every movement, every breath you took. Your instinct was to resist, to deny him, but you were too far gone. This is what you wanted in the first place. A trade. Your submission for a chance at freedom. You didn’t test his patience, knowing this was a better option than being bent of the counter. You complied, your hand slowly sliding down your stomach, until they were back between your legs. 

Slow, deliberate circles. 

You were so used to the feeling of shame, the heat you’d feel in your cheeks, the tears that would sting your eyes. Freezing, like a puppy out in the rain, you trembled. The shame was almost ritualistic, something to expect everytime you were intimate. Your body always seemed to respond, anyways. Maybe it was time for you to fully accept your part in this. Maybe you were beginning to crave that feeling. 

Your pace quickened, your fingers moving in urgent circles, and you felt your release building. 

“That’s it,” He said, “You’re already close, aren’t you?”

You nodded, fully aware of the smugness in his tone. Your fingers worked and your moans became louder, “Please,” You begged, that pressure between your legs growing unbearable.

“Please,” You heard yourself say over and over, feeling yourself come undone. His hands slowly move to rest on either side of you, trapping you between the cold marble and his towering figure, “Please, Rafe.”

“Come, sweetheart,” He finally said, “Let me see you fall apart.”

A whimper escaped your lips as your orgasm hit you almost painfully. Your release was inevitable, you’d practically perfected getting yourself off, and your body responded to his commands like a pupper on a string. Your body tensed, your back arching, as you gasped over and over. Your fingers faltered, slowly, but soon there were fingers brushing against that sensitive area again. 

You tried to scoot your body away but Rafe pressed your thigh with his large palm, keeping you pinned. Slowly, he moved his fingers, prolonging that sensation, drawing out your orgasm, “There it is,” He whispered, “Such a good girl when you want something from me, huh?”

You nodded weakly, agreeable. 

As you realized he was trying to work you up again, you panicked, “P-Please.”

“Hmm,” His fingers pressed harder, “Look at you. You know what? If you give me one more, I’ll let you go shopping next week. How’s that sound?”

“I-It hurts,” You whispered, voice braking. A tempting offer that you were now too overwhelmed to even consider. His fingers didn’t relent, rubbing against you harder now, dragging you toward another release whether you wanted it or not.

“That’s not an answer,” Rafe teased, his tone almost playful. He leaned down, his breath hot against your ear, “Come on, one more. You can do that for me, can’t you?”

Your body betrayed you again. The buildup was slower than your first orgasm, so torturous that tears began to fall down your cheeks. When your body was convulsing again, it was not as sweet as the first, but just as powerful. You came for him again despite how much it hurt, how raw and exposed you felt.

His grip on your thigh relaxed and you body went limp against the counter. You throbbed between your legs, so much so you weren’t sure if you would be able to walk without a limp. You felt his thumb brush over your cheek, wiping your tears, “Good girl. That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

Too tired to do anything but lay there, Rafe finally stepped back, leaving you shivering on the cold countertop. A coldness returned to his expression. You’d asked for this. Wanted something from him. Somehow, it felt like you hadn’t won anything at all. Now you were realizing this was a punishment, most likely for your behavior over the past weeks. 

Rafe turned his back on you, as if he hadn’t just pushed your body and mind to the brink, “Maybe I’ll take you shopping after all.” 

The promise of being let out of the house felt hollow. A reminder that your independence was something he could grant, or take away, on a whim. 

You lay there, motionless and speechless, trapped in the swirl of shame, regret, and anger. Then, without warning, a dangerous thought crept in, slipping through the cracks in your resolve: Maybe if I’m good enough, if I do everything he asks, I’ll get more freedom. More moments of escape.But before you could push that thought away, another surfaced, darker and heavier: Maybe I deserve this.

i hope you enjoyed this series!!

[celestialtarot11]

Astro Observations <3

My best friend has Gemini over her 12th house, and I’m a Gemini Venus. I always said to her that her spirit guides know me, and in fact they talk to me to get messages to her. It makes sense given our shared 12th house placement. She has Saturn over her 12th house and found it difficult to communicate with the spirit realm. But through me, it’s like I’m the gateway to her receiving the messages she needs to hear. Straight up, spirit talks through me like a normal person. Our connections runs deep and its easy for us to communicate spiritually. Likewise, she has dreams that are related to me and she gives me warnings of anything I need to know :)

Having sun in the 10th house composite of a relationship, the breakup/ending/issues can be public against the couples will. Be careful, people will want to leak personal information to the public even if they aren’t meant to do so. Also, major power couple vibes. People strive to copy this couple and may send evil eye their way. This couple embodies Pinterest 😤 a walking pinterest board

Pluto in the 10th and having an emotional reactive father figure. Hi 🤗✨ and then equally arguing with their father if the native has fire/earth placements. Ya’ll got facts to spit ☕️ but also thats because you guys hold in everything you want to say, so at some point it bubbles out.

Pluto in the 4th house and having an emotionally turbulent mother. Hi :) maybe she was diagnosed with BPD as well. Any moon-Pluto aspect can indicate the mother having BPD, or narcissistic tendencies.

Jupiter in Leo women will not settle for less than they deserve. They are fierce in what they want in a partner.

Jupiter in virgo indicates marrying a spiritual partner. Someone who will share spiritual awakenings with you.

Virgo’s tend to grow spiritually as they get older, and they are great at manifesting abundance/ spiritual help. They have a whole team of ancestors by their side 😤 the type to call on their ancestors after someone drops a petty comment

Also, women with jupiter in virgo are incredibly detailed when it comes to their partner and who they will date. They want a partner who will represent them, not just anyone. Even with males this can be true. Women with jupiter in virgo knows they worked hard to get to where they are at, so they want a partner who will be on their level. They know that their partner is a reflection of their healing. A reflection of them as a whole. So just like jupiter in leo, jupiter in virgo women will not settle for less than they deserve

P.S Jupiter in virgo women come up with the most funniest roasts for men they don’t like 🤡💅🏻 they’re real quick and sassy with it & blunt. Same with Jupiter in leo women.

Gemini venus, when ya’ll get your nails done just KNOW abundance is coming your way. Caring for your hands/using them to create/ scripting with them is how you manifest. You don’t absolutely need to get your nails done if you’re not a baddie like that (and thats fine ☺️) you’re still a baddie using your words to make anything come true. If you have a taurus degree on your venus, buying necklaces, rings, will also attract abundance to you 💅🏻 even getting a tattoo on your neck/hands can help greatly

Thank ya’ll so much for reading, hope you guys found it resonated and found it funny ☺️💗 its meant to be a great time reading these posts but also informative! I appreciate all the support send my way 🌀✨☕️

Book a reading with me here 🤍

[tbyfandoms]

Invisible String | Austin Butler x Reader

Pairing : austin butler x actress!reader

Word Count: 11.6k

Summary: y/n and austin have known each other for years. each harbors feelings for the other yet they remain clueless to it until an accidental slip up from austin leads to a series of events that reveals just how destined for each other they've always been (requested)

Warnings: mild swearing

Masterlist/Request Form | Ask/Tell/Request

A/N: when i got this request, i knew immediately i had to write it. i adore the thought of soulmates and second chance romance and this request was perfect for that. i loved writing this story full of these two completely missing the signs they’re supposed to be together, and i hope you love reading it just as much. it is dialogue centered, so a lot of explaining and talking is done (hence the word count) and i just wanted to give ya’ll a little warning! Make sure to keep track of who’s saying what. I feel like I’ve structured it in a way that makes it easier, but still. anyways, to the user who requested this, thank you and i hope you like it! :)

psa: i tweaked dates of when certain interviews came out and what happened during them. also kaia and austin aren’t dating in this. all for the sake of the fic, but i just wanted to say something about it in case anyone gets confused!

Fourteen years ago

“So-uh, was that-was that okay?” Austin reaches up and scratches the back of his neck. The blush on his cheeks is evident, even under the grime the makeup artists have piled on his face. The sight makes you giggle, leaving the boy’s cheeks to flush deeper.

“It was more than okay,” you reply, your voice dropping to a whisper. “It was perfect.”

The blonde gives you a lopsided grin and you can’t help but to give one in return, feeling like you’re floating. You and Austin have just finished your final solo scene together for the film Aliens in the Attic. The two of you are love interests; you playing the best friend of the character Bethany, and Austin playing her cousin.

To say the role was a bit of a challenge is an understatement. It’s not that you couldn’t remember your lines or you were suffering from stage fright, it was that you didn’t know how to act around Austin. The moment you got introduced to the boy, you knew you were done for. He was, is, charming and funny and beyond attractive. The two of you are both still teenagers. You’re not sure about him, but for you at least, you haven’t dealt with a whole lot of crushes or relationships yet. So it was a bit difficult to deal with more or less.

It’s like every time you would go to shoot a scene with him, your brain would short circuit and your pulse would jump higher than you thought it could. It didn’t help at all that he was so nice to you and did whatever he could to make you laugh in between takes.

The days leading up to your final scene alone with him—the kissing scene—you were a wreck. Both excitement and nerves coursing through your veins. You figured it was merely a little on the job attraction, of course you'd feel something for the person playing your love interest. You completely ignored the true feelings planting roots in your heart, as was a certain blonde companion.

Lips still tingling with warmth, you try to subtly lift your fingers to them, grazing over the slightly swollen skin. You watch as Austin takes his bottom lip between his teeth, still looking nervous as ever.

It's undeniable—the connection between the two of you. Although you haven't been filming for long, it took practically no time for you and Austin to become close. There was something about him you couldn't get over and he felt the same way about you.

Days and nights were filled with endless laughter and conversations you felt like you couldn't talk about with many other people. He made you feel special, seen. You can't believe it's all over now.

"Hey-" you both speak at the same time, simultaneously realizing you can't bear to let it all end like this.

The two of you laugh; Austin's blue eyes—that noticeably light up every time they spot you—shift to the floor for a second over his awkwardness. No matter how hard he tries, he can't seem to keep his cool around you.

"You first," you say, tilting your head to try and catch his eye again. Looking up from under the curls of his sandy blonde hair, Austin takes a breath before he goes to speak again.

"Would you um-." His voice gives a little and you have to hold back your smile at how nervous and unsure of himself he seems. The thought that maybe he's acting like this over you sends your heart into overdrive. Clearing his throat the boy continues, "Would you want to go-"

"There you guys are! You two lovebirds killed it! For a second I thought it was real!" Ashley comes up to you and Austin, wrapping her arms around you both while she laughs. You swear you couldn't love Ashley Tisdale any more than you already do, but God did she have bad timing.

Your eyes meet Austin's across from the girl and there's evidently something unspoken there between you. Was he going to ask you out? Was this more than just an innocent little crush?

"Thanks, Ash, glad it was believable!" The two of you laugh together, but you can't help the pull towards Austin, to get back to that conversation and find out what his next words were going to be.

Ashley instantly knows something's happened, she was always good with stuff like that. "Did I interrupt something?" She looks between the two of you, trying to grasp what it is she walked in on, but you're not even completely sure what it is.

"No, nothing at all," Austin says, barely looking at you now. You shake off the feeling of the tiny pang in your chest. "I was just gonna see if Y/N wanted to go hit up the snack table one last time, and now that you're here, we can all go together!"

Ashley doesn't believe it for a second, especially with the look on your face, she can tell there's more to the story. While the three of you walk over to the refreshments, Ashley holds herself back from butting in. It's too bad she did and that she's the only one who can see through Austin's lie. If she would’ve said something or if you would've noticed, maybe things would've been different. Maybe it would've been you on his arm a few years later instead of Vanessa Hudgens...

Present day

The memories of that final filming day swarm your mind as you sit with your jaw dropped to the floor while staring at the tv in front of you.

It took ten seconds, ten seconds, for your buried feelings for Austin Butler to come bubbling back to the surface.

And it’s all his fault.

Curse you finally having a night off to sit and watch television, curse James Corden for creating games that make people spill their secrets, and curse Austin Butler for causing your feelings for him you thought you buried long ago to claw their way out again.

He could’ve lied. You’re sure there are tons of guests who have lied on The Late Late Show to get out of embarrassment or scrutiny, and Austin definitely could have. There is no way what he said is true, no way.

But why you? Why say your name out of hundreds of others. When James pressed for who his celebrity crush is, why did your name come up first?

The blush on Austin's face is clear as day, even through the screen. He's fidgety and chuckling as he rubs the back of his neck, the audience 'ooo'ing at his confession. The sight is all too familiar.

Your mind reels over what's happened. You're shocked but you also can't help the tiny feeling of giddiness that's making your stomach flutter. Brushing your hand over your face, you grumble at the warmth of your cheeks.

Damn this man and his affect on you. It's been fourteen years, fourteen, since you've seen him in person, since you've talked practically. And yet he still makes you feel just like you did on that movie set; jumbled, nervous, and smitten.

After filming wrapped on Aliens in the Attic, you got a job offer you couldn't refuse. You moved to a different country to begin filming a show you never thought you'd get even a supporting role in, let alone the lead.

That role set you for life, it was a fan favorite, but it took up practically every aspect of your existence. Sure you were able to come back home to visit family and friends once in a while, but those visits were few and far between. To even think about meeting up with Austin was out of the question. It just wasn’t in the cards as far as you could tell, especially when he was attached at the hip with his girlfriend or off filming his own roles. Even if you could’ve met up with him, the fact you couldn't admit those feelings you had for him would’ve crushed you. You couldn’t bear the weight of keeping those feelings hidden while he fell so deeply in love with another woman.

When your show wrapped, only needing a few seasons to tell the creator's full story, you figured it was back to square one; time to go home and face everything, but that was so far from what happened. That leading role was a once in the lifetime opportunity and it boosted your career to a height you could've only dreamed of. Due to the popularity of the show and your evident acting chops, you were on every casting director's radar from then on.

You booked movies with franchises like Marvel, Godzilla, and even Star Wars. The offers poured in from every angle, and majority of them you graciously accepted. To say you were nonstop busy for years would be an understatement. You barely even had time to think about Austin anymore, and to be honest you wouldn’t allow yourself to anyways.

He never admitted any feelings in the short months you stayed in contact over the phone after Aliens in the Attic wrapped, and even if he did have any, he clearly moved on. You took it as a sign to cut your losses, shake the feeling that he felt the same about you, no matter how much it hurt.

Still, It's crazy to think about how long it's been since you've talked to Austin. The both of you had such a strong bond, one you have yet to find with another. It blows your mind how easy it was to sever something so special.

Breaking you out of your thoughts, your phone starts rattling on the table before you. Picking up the device, there's a name across the top of the screen that you're not totally surprised to see; Ashley Tisdale.

"Ash-" You're cut off immediately, Ashley's voice rapidly spilling from the speakers.

"Y/N! Oh my god, girl, are you seeing this!?" There could be a million things your best friend of over a decade could be talking about, but you know instantly what she's referring to. What else is there, really?

"I have yet to pick my jaw back up off the floor." Ashley laughs and you can practically see her now; standing in her living room, probably holding Jupiter on her hip as she paces back and forth in front of the tv. It's hard to keep her still when she's excited. Ashley that is, not Jupiter.

"So what are you gonna do about it? You’re gonna reach out to him, right?” Your eyes widen instantly at Ashley’s questions, the idea seeming absurd to you.

“What!? No, no way! Ash, you know how long it’s been since I’ve spoken to him! That’s out of the question. There’s no shot I’m gonna call him up and say, ‘Hey saw you on tv saying you had a crush on me! Wanna hook up?’ Absolutely not!” The blonde’s laugh cuts through your phone speakers and the sound makes you smile, even with the present state of disbelief you’re in.

“I mean, it could work! He’s a simple guy,” she teases, and you roll your eyes even though she can’t see you. “In all seriousness, though, this is a big deal. I know Austin and he wouldn’t just say something like that and not mean it, no matter how nervous he was.”

You let that roll around in your head for a second. It makes sense and Ashley would know better than anyone, she is his best friend for God’s sake. But still, it just doesn’t seem right to you, it’s too out of the blue.

In reality, it’s your fear of being hurt again, of once again thinking falsely about how someone—how Austin—feels about you that’s preventing you from letting this be something positive.

“I don’t know. I guess I’m just stuck on the fact it’s happening now. Why after all this time? It’s been fourteen years, Ashley.” Your voice is timid and your friend can tell even over the phone that you’re scared, even if you won’t admit it. She decides now is the time to let it all out, if only for your sake. It’s better late than never.

“Y/N/N, I have to tell you something.” The sentence makes your throat go dry. As if anything else could happen tonight. You clear your throat and urge your friend to continue.

“What is it?”

“When we were wrapping Aliens, do you remember when I came up to you and Austin after your final scene together? After your kiss?” Your blood runs cold. As if you hadn’t just been thinking about that memory.

“Yeah, what about it?” You’re confused and anxious. This shouldn’t be that big of a deal, but it is, at least for you. Because it’s not just some guy or just some crush. It’s Austin, the guy you can honestly say now that you were falling in love with all those years ago. The guy who made you laugh and feel special in a way that no one’s ever been able to replicate. To think you missed something, to think maybe there could’ve been a chance, sends you reeling.

“When I walked up to you I could tell I interrupted something. I think the whole time we were filming I knew there was something happening between you both but I never said anything because I didn’t want to make things awkward for you. I knew when Austin asked if we wanted to go get snacks that he was lying. We may not have known each other for that long at that point, but he was so easy to read it was ridiculous he even tried hiding what he really wanted.” You wince at that, but keep quiet. You wish you could’ve been able to read him that easily, maybe things would’ve been different.

“I never asked him about it, but I think it was two years after that when he admitted everything to me on his own. You were off filming your show and Austin and Vanessa were just starting to get serious. We were hanging out like we always do, we had a couple drinks, and were trying to find a movie when suddenly Aliens in the Attic came on! We watched it just for shits and giggles but then the ending came when you guys kiss and I could tell Austin wanted to talk about something. I paused the movie and turned to him and took one look in his eyes and knew I was right about the two of you before he even said anything.

“He liked you, babe. Like really, truly liked you. He didn’t say it but I think it was more like loved you. You should’ve heard the way he talked about you, about what it was like between you both. I asked him about that day, called him out on his lie, and he told me straight up he wanted to ask you out but got too scared. Austin said he wanted to tell you so many times when you would talk on the phone, wanted to try and make it work even though you moved countries, but he just couldn’t admit it. Convinced himself it wouldn’t work. And then I introduced him to Vanessa and things took off from there. He said it was for the best and that he felt good with V.

“After he said all that he tried to play it off, make it seem like his feelings for you were gone, that the past was the past and it just wasn’t meant to be. But I could tell there was still something there. I know he loved her so much, Y/N, but I swear to God after that night I never once saw his eyes shine again like they did when he talked about you.”

Sinking into the couch, you feel as if you’re in some kind of dream space. Nothing quite seems real as you stare at your television and watch as the man of the hour laughs at something James has said, while you try your best to process all that Ashley has revealed.

“Oh my god,” you croak out, your mouth feeling incredibly dry. Mind racing, you can’t quite find the right words to articulate what you’re feeling.

“I know it’s a lot and kind of sounds crazy, but it’s all true. Hell, I don’t even know if Austin remembers it happening, but I’ve never forgotten it. I’m sorry I kept it from you but I figured it was best; Austin was getting serious about Vanessa and you were busy with your show and casually dating at the time. I didn’t want to cause any unnecessary drama or hurt. Ugh, maybe I should’ve told you sooner. I should’ve said something that last night of filming!” It’s obvious the girl feels bad about it all, conflicted even. Even in your shocked state, you immediately put a stop to her worries.

“Ash, please don’t blame yourself for anything. Even if you had told me what Austin said or if you had done something when we wrapped, it wouldn’t have changed anything. I still would’ve gotten the show offer and still would’ve moved. Austin and I didn’t deserve to jump into something just for us to be torn apart. Besides, he and Vanessa would’ve crossed paths anyways. It was never going to be him and I. If not Vanessa, Austin would’ve found some other girl. Our lives just didn’t line up back then, that had to be some kind of sign we weren’t meant to be.” Your voice trails off, mind traveling back to those years and how hard it was to keep your closest relationships afloat. You can’t even imagine what it would’ve been like trying to keep a romantic relationship going, especially being separated by an ocean.

There’s a part of your brain that tells you you would’ve tried with Austin despite the obstacles, would’ve done anything to keep him close and not lose contact like you did. You shake it off quickly before it can consume you.

“You’re right about the timing and distance I suppose, but you're wrong about you and Austin not being meant to be.” Ashley pauses for a moment, thinking about her next words. She takes a breath and then, “Maybe it wasn’t meant to be back then, but what if it’s meant to be now.”

Your breath catches in your throat and you do your best to not choke on it. “I don’t know about that. I-It’s been too long. We were just kids back then. I don’t even know who he is anymore. Besides, even if he’s being serious about me being his celebrity crush, that’s all it is. It’s not like he said he’s in love with me.”

Bringing your feet up on the couch, you hug your knees close to your chest, needing some sort of comfort and a way to ground yourself. This past half hour has been one of the craziest of your life, and that’s saying something.

“He may not have said it, but he’s sure shown it.” Ashley goes quiet for a moment, you can hear shuffling and small noises from Jupiter; she must be putting her to bed. The lack of conversation leaves you a moment to ponder what your friend might mean. How has Austin shown he loves you? You haven’t even been in the same room together for over a decade. She must be mistaken.

Before you get a chance to dismiss her claims, the actress chimes in again. “Just hear me out on the things I’m about to tell you, okay? Over these past few years since Austin and Vanessa’s breakup, I’ve noticed certain things that make me believe Austin at least still thinks about you, and I say 'thinks' since I can tell you don’t want to believe it’s love.” There’s a joking edge to her voice and you lightly laugh at the way she’s able to know your thoughts without even being with you in person.

The whole thing seems absurd. You don’t really understand how you got to this point; discussing with your best friend how a man you knew fourteen years ago might still have feelings for you, but here you are. There is a tiny part of you that thinks maybe it isn’t so absurd because maybe, just maybe, you still have feelings for him too.

“Okay,” you decide. “Lay it on me.”

“Alright so I’m just gonna be honest and tell you he hasn’t said anything to me about it upfront, but like I said he’s easier to read than Jupiter’s baby books so I can tell this man is hiding something from me.” The both of you chuckle and you shake your head. This girl truly never misses a beat.

“First of all, he hasn’t dated anyone in three years, Y/N/N. Sure he’s hooked up with one or two girls, but every time I ask if this new girl is the one, he says it’s not gonna work out, that she’s not the one. And when I try to get it out of him who he thinks the one is, he looks at me like a little boy afraid to say he has a crush on a girl at school and then changes the subject.”

“Ashley-“

“Wait! No, okay, I know what you’re gonna say. You’re gonna say ‘that could mean anything, that doesn’t automatically make me the girl he’s talking about’, and that’s what I thought at first too, but then he started asking about you.”

Heat rushes to your face, your chest beginning to tighten as a fluttering feeling takes over your body. He asked about me? You bite your bottom lip and rub your hand over your face, preparing yourself for what Ashley is going to say next.

“It was subtle, I know he thinks he got away with it, but I knew every time he brought you up, it was because he was trying to find out more about you, trying to figure out a way to get close to you again. He was slick about it at first, would ask how you are when a commercial for one of your movies came up, but then he would straight up ask if you would be coming to the parties or hangouts I would have.”

“Oh my God,” you whisper, once again at a loss for any other words as excitement and disbelief course through your veins.

“I don’t know why he didn’t just ask me for your number, he knows I have it. I should’ve just given it to him but I didn’t want to overstep with you, didn’t know if you would want me to. I knew how busy you were and figured you wouldn’t have the time or maybe just wouldn’t want to considering how long it had been since you guys talked. I should’ve just been my normal scheming self and handed it over. To be fair I did try to get you guys together without either of you knowing over these last few years after I realized what he was up to-“

“Ashley!” You shriek, laughter erupting from within you and ringing out across your living room.

“What!? I couldn’t help it! It was clear to me Austin was into you, or at least wanted to reconnect, and I kinda wanted to see what happened! I told you I knew there was something between you guys way back then so I figured you probably felt the same as him. It never worked though because every time he would come to my functions, you couldn’t, and every time you would come, he couldn’t! I for sure thought it would finally happen when we had Juju’s party, but you had to leave to catch your flight right before Austin got there. It’s like you guys kept missing each other.”

Every single one of those instances floods your mind as Ashley says this. To think you guys could’ve been reunited, but something or someone pulled you away from it every time. And Jupiter’s birthday? The fact you missed him by mere minutes. You don’t know whether to take this all as a good or bad sign, clearly Austin wants to be in your life, but the universe seemingly has other plans.

“I don’t even know what to say,” you breathe out. “I mean, that’s crazy, right? It’s like we’re on the same path to each other, but we’re taking different routes, just missing each other every single time.”

"I know you're probably thinking this might be a bad sign, but I don't think it is. You and Austin had a bond that not many people get to have in their lifetime. You don't just forget about something like that. Sure you haven't talked in years, but that doesn't mean you still can't care for each other. Sometimes the universe has a plan that may not always happen when you want it to, but it's there. Like you said, it's like you're on the same path to each other, and maybe it's finally time the two of you are meant to be back together."

Ashley's words hit you hard. On the outside it might look like you and Austin just aren't supposed to cross paths again, but there's no way that could be true, not with all that's happened.

"I can't believe this is actually happening," you say. "All this time I thought I lost him for good, that he never felt the same as me back then." Tilting your head back on your couch, you let out a short, breathy laugh.

"And to think it's all because Austin just had to spill his guts on television." Once again you find yourself laughing with your best friend. To think you met two of the most important and special people in your life on the set of a silly little alien movie is so crazy, but you're glad it happened. You really don't think you'd be where you are today if things had been different, you definitely could say it was fate.

"So what do I do? Damn, I really am gonna have to call him and say 'Hey saw you on tv saying you had a crush on me! Wanna hook up?', aren't I?"

Ashley snorts on the other line and the sound makes you giggle. “Okay honestly, for once I’m gonna go back on what I’ve said. I definitely think this is too much to discuss over a phone call. You two need to be face to face when this happens.”

“I guess start your party planning then because I have no idea how else I’m supposed to meet him in person without having to call him first.”

While you sit on the couch and begin to nibble lightly on your bottom lip as you contemplate, an idea immediately comes to Ashley’s mind, and she knows the second she thinks of it that you’re not gonna like it.

“What if-,“ she hesitates, tossing the idea back and forth in her head, trying to decide if it really is the way to go. She decides it doesn’t hurt to at least suggest it. “What if you talked to him at the Met?”

You blink and then your eyes go wide. The thought of meeting up with Austin at the Met Gala hadn’t even crossed your mind. To be fair you’ve been trying to block it out since you found out you’d both be attending. The prospect of running into him for the first time in fourteen years during one of the biggest nights of the year sort of terrifies you.

“I-I mean I guess I could but-,“ shaking your head, you let out a huff and lean back into the couch.

“I know it’s not ideal, but this is your chance! I know you guys have obligations in the beginning, but the rest of the night is yours! You can find a cozy little corner to chat or whatever…” Ashley giggles and you gasp.

“Ashley, seriously!?” The girl laughs and you just roll your eyes, fighting back a smile.

“I’m sorry! I know this is serious, I’ll stop. But honestly, Y/N, this could work. It’s two weeks away, you have plenty of time to prepare. I know there’s no guarantee of anything happening, but don’t you at least wanna see what happens? This could change everything.” Ashley’s tone is light and supportive, you know she’s rooting for you and Austin, apparently always has been.

You know she’s right, that this could really be it. Maybe the universe really did have a plan for you and Austin all along, sure it wasn’t when you wanted it to happen, but it’s better late than never. There’s only one way to find out.

“Okay,” you reply. “I’ll do it. I’ll talk to Austin at the Met Gala.”

*****

The last two weeks have been…interesting to say the least. When Austin’s interview aired, you thought nothing of it in terms of media and fan attention, surely nothing would come of it. The only ones who would notice and mull it over would be you and Ashley, but boy were you wrong.

For fourteen straight days your socials have been filled with tags, comments, and mentions of you and Austin. All of which include photos or videos of the two of you from your days working on Aliens. There were so many people picking apart everything they could, theorizing, and making absurd assumptions. Majority of the time everything was light hearted and funny, but you couldn’t shake the feeling of how weird it all felt.

While looking at everything and seeing all the comments, it made you feel like you were right back on that set, like you were fourteen years in the past and you couldn’t make your way out. The whole thing made you feel like a teenager again, made you feel like that naive girl who was falling for her costar.

It’s funny how easy it is to slip back into those feelings, how some photos or clips dug up from strangers on the internet can suddenly transport you back to a time you tried hard to forget about and move on from. For the past few days you’ve been fighting with yourself on whether you’re taking that as a good or bad thing, but for now the jury is still out.

It’s almost time now. Any minute your car would pull up to the Met and you’d find yourself climbing those stairs and making your way to the one person who’s taken up space in your mind for two weeks.

Anxiety is definitely starting to rattle your bones and for once it isn’t because of the paparazzi or fans. It’s because of a boy, a man.

Times goes faster than you would’ve liked and suddenly you're stepping out to a swarm of flashing lights and excited screams. Somehow these things calm you, ground you. You choose to ignore the reason for this; the chaos drowns out your thoughts of seeing Austin tonight.

Staff ushers you along as you make your way towards the entrance of the building. Even with the fluid movement of everything, there’s no doubt you’re turning heads, almost forcing everyone to stop what they’re doing in order to get a look at you.

The past few years when it comes to the Met it’s no secret that people have been disappointed in certain looks, disappointed in a clear lack of on-theme fashion. But that’s so far from what’s happening with you tonight.

People would bet money that if Anna Wintour laid eyes on you right now, she would fall to her knees in both gratitude and awe over how on theme and brilliant you look. And that is saying something.

The fact that what you're wearing is even a topic to be discussed leaves you giggling and shaking your head, being a celebrity sure is crazy sometimes.

For a moment, you take a mental step back and really take everything in. It's crazy to you how far you've come, how much things have changed in such a short time. In just over a decade your whole life has been turned around. You've had experiences you've only ever dreamed of and it just keeps getting better. Not a day will ever go by where you aren't thankful for what's happened to you.

Sure, maybe you would've changed some things, taken different paths, or tried a little more with certain people. But at the end of the day all of that led you to where you are now—right here.

Keeping that in mind, you allow yourself to take a breath, to stop obsessing over what may or may not happen with Austin—if you even get a chance to talk to him. Stressing out over what ifs will do nothing good for you, and you know that. Whatever's meant to be, will be. Good or bad—with or without Austin—tonight will happen as it should.

You tilt your head down and close your eyes for a second, smile at the thought if it all, and then proceed to head inside.

*****

As the night goes on, it's clear to you that there's a possibility you really won't speak to Austin this evening. Somehow, you haven't seen him at all. You wouldn't have even known he showed if it wasn't for one of your friends gushing over how great the whole 'Elvis ensemble' looked earlier.

To be fair, you haven't really gotten a chance to even look for the guy. It's like everywhere you turn there's a friend or work colleague pulling you every which way and wanting to talk to you. It warms your heart to be speaking with so many lovely people, but if you wanted to even have a chance at letting something happen between you and Austin tonight, it would have to happen fast. The night may be young, but people would be leaving the museum soon to attend the countless after parties thrown throughout the night.

Who knows, you think, maybe Austin already left...

*****

Unbeknownst to you, Austin had seen you countless times tonight. Each time he caught a glimpse of you he was awestruck, as if he had never seen such a beautiful person before. But it was more than that too, it was the way he would watch as you laughed at something your friend would say, the way you would smile when greeting someone. Austin so desperately wanted to walk over to you—to hear that laugh and to have you smile at him like that. He had missed it so much.

But each time he would gather up the courage, someone would pull him away towards some producer he just had to talk to, or to some chairman he didn't even know existed until tonight, or to just someone who wasn't you.

Austin did his best to not look like a creep as he kept sneaking quick glances at you as often as he could. There was a part of him that hoped maybe you were looking to catch his eye as much as he wanted to catch yours. Every time you'd scan the area—as if you were looking for someone—his pulse would jump. You'd be just about to see him when someone would call your name or pull you away. You were constantly slipping through his fingers, have been for the past fourteen years from what he could gather from Ashley, and he wants that to end now—he needs it to.

"Austin." The blonde nearly jumps out of his seat as he's ripped from his thoughts. He clears his throat and rubs the back of his neck, hoping and praying he didn't just get caught staring at you as you speak to Daisy Edgar-Jones.

It's Priscilla and from the knowing look on her face Austin can tell he's busted. "M'sorry, what did you say?" Austin does his best to look fully invested in the woman sitting beside him, but no amount of fake attentiveness could fool Priscilla Presley.

"I said," Priscilla smiles. "When are you going to stop staring at that girl and go talk to her?"

Austin can feel the heat rising to his face and he tries to collect himself as much as possible in order to not let on to anything. "I-uh, I don't-." He chuckles, not totally sure on how to salvage this.

"Oh c'mon, Austin. You've been looking at her since the moment we got here. I didn't think anything of it, but when Baz was talking to you earlier and all you were doing was looking over his shoulder at her, I could tell something was up."

Austin immediately feels a small sense of shame, "I hadn't realized. M'so sorry, Priscilla. I didn't mean to be disrespectful or anything, especially not to you and Baz-"

Priscilla shakes her head, placing her hand on Austin's arm to let him know she's not trying to reprimand him. "There's nothing to apologize for! Trust me when I tell you it went right over Baz's head. He's so invested in this whole thing and drunk off the champagne he didn't even notice. I'm saying this to you because I want to know why you haven't gone over to her yet. We've just been sitting here for over a half hour, there's nothing stopping you from reaching out to her."

Austin can tell by the look in Priscilla's eyes that she knows something is up. She can tell he cares for the girl and wants to talk to her, she just can't understand why he hasn't already. You don't look at a woman like that and not go up to her.

"I just-I want to it's just-" Austin feels at a loss for words. His eyes flick to you across the room and his heart nearly bursts at the sight. He doesn't understand how he could care for someone so much even after how long it's been since you two have spoken. He's never been able to shake the way you make him feel, even after he fell in love with someone else and buried his feelings for you deep down, they were still always there. You were still always there.

"I know it may not seem like it, but I am hip to what goes on online. She's that girl you worked with a long time ago that everyone's talking about, isn't she?" Priscilla's eyes and smile are warm, inviting. She has this way about her that's always been able to calm Austin. Even when he was nervous as all get out when he met her for the first time, she was able to ease his nerves. Able to make him feel like he had someone to talk to, someone looking out for him.

The actor can feel his shoulders relax, feel some of the tension melt away as he decides there's no better person to open up to about love than Priscilla.

"Yeah, she is," Austin smiles. "If I'm bein' honest with you, I'm pretty sure I've been in love with her since I was seventeen years old. Sure I fell for other people, but I think there's a part of me that's always known no one else has ever, or will ever, make me feel the way she did-does."

There's a sense of relief Austin feels as the words leave his lips. He never thought he'd ever admit that to anyone, especially not out loud, and yet here he is. And if someone were to ask how it feels, he'd say it feels damn good.

"That's a beautiful feeling to have, and to know it as well. Not a lot of people find that person that makes them feel such a way, and they definitely don't always get the chance to have them back in their lives when they do."

Austin reaches out to grab Priscilla's hand and she places her other on top of his, squeezing it lightly. "No, they don't."

There's an unspoken understanding passed between the two. A nod to a past love and the chance a different ending can be written for a present one.

"I may not know a lot about the two of you, but it's clear to me you care a lot for this young woman and you can't let anything hold you back from finally going after her, from telling her how you feel. Love is one of the most important things in a person's life, and you've got to do everything you can to hold it close while you still can."

Austin nods his head, understanding completely what Priscilla is telling him. He knows with all his heart she's right; that he can't let anything or anyone hold him back any longer from the one he truly loves, not even himself.

"Go, Austin. It's obvious there's something destined to happen between you both; timing doesn't align like this for no reason. Now is your chance." Priscilla lets go of Austin's hand and there's a glint in her eyes Austin's only ever seen a few times before, all for the same reason.

As the blonde begins to stand up, he stops for a second. "Thank you, Priscilla, truly."

The woman closes her eyes briefly, nodding her head. Austin smiles once more before turning and walking straight to the person he's wanted to talk to for fourteen years, not stopping for anything.

*****

Taking a final sip of your drink, you stand from your chair. Half your table has cleared out, leaving with excited mumblings of after parties and late night escapades.

Part of you aches to stay longer to try and seek out Austin, but you really have no way to. All of your friends have already gone, the only one left being Daisy, but she wants to leave now too. Sure you could stay on your own, but who would be your cover? You don't really want to go walking around asking if anyone has seen the Elvis star—not with everything that's been going on in the media lately. You'd hate to draw attention to your desire to seek out an old friend and have it spin into something it's not.

"Ready?" Daisy asks from beside you, a light smile on her lips. Nodding, you return her smile before taking one last look around the extravagant room, hoping to catch a flash of familiar sandy hair somewhere.

"Yeah let's-"

Cutting yourself off, your neck nearly snaps at the speed in which you turn it back around. It was only for a second that you saw him, and only out of the corner of your eye, but you would recognize that face anywhere. It's Austin. And he's coming straight towards you.

Daisy notices your sudden change in demeanor instantly and it doesn't take her long to figure out what's happening. She sees the blonde and connects the dots. It's hard for her to contain her smile.

"I'll talk to you later, yeah?" She says, drawing your attention away from the approaching actor. Your eyes widen a little as you turn towards her again. There's no shot she missed your reaction, but you're glad it's Daisy who's caught it and not someone else. You told her a little about what's going on the other day when you were catching up, and you know she'd take everything to her grave if you asked her to.

"Yeah, of course." Reaching out to grasp her hand you whisper, "Thank you."

Daisy squeezes your hand in hers, nodding. "You're welcome and good luck." The girl gives you a knowing look before grabbing her clutch from the table and following the steady stream of people towards the exit.

Even over the constant flow of chatter and light music, you hear when Austin's steps stop behind you. You know that this is it, the moment you turn around everything will change. This could mean nothing, Austin could simply want to exchange pleasantries and catch up, but there's a part of you that knows that's far from what's going to happen.

Turning on your heels, you're met with ocean blue eyes you never thought you'd see in person again, and suddenly your mind is completely numb. All previous thoughts and anxieties are thrown out the window as you get lost in those big blue orbs.

"You look...beautiful," Austin gasps out. The comment leaves your cheeks feeling flushed, but you do your best to not shy away.

"Thank you," You whisper, your voice failing you as you're hit with so many emotions. If you thought seeing those old videos and pictures of you and Austin would be bad, it's got nothing on how you feel with him standing right here in front of you.

It's been over a decade and yet it's as if no time has passed at all. He's the same boy from that movie set all those years ago. Sure he's older, more defined, but he's got those same warm features. That same inviting and comforting aura that drew you to him in the first place.

"How long's it been?" He questions, but you can tell he knows exactly how long it's been. You can see it in his eyes, in the way he looks over your features as if he can't get enough of you, as if he's been waiting ages for this day.

"Fourteen years," you both say at the same time. There's a beat of silence, the weight of that revelation being spoken to each other for the first time hanging in the air.

The way it makes you feel is odd. There's a rush of sadness that passes through you and it passes through Austin as well. It's funny how quickly time flys. How it never really affected you because you had always been so busy. You didn't have time to think about what could've been with Austin, you didn't allow yourself to. You practically built a wall to block out the what ifs and the feelings you knew you had to let go of.

But knowing what you know now—that there could've been a chance and the fact he’s here with you—makes it all come crashing down.

In an instant you find yourself lunging towards the man before you, wrapping your arms tightly around him and falling in an embrace you haven't had in a long time.

To hell with the gossip, you think, let them talk. I missed him.

To anyone else the way Austin holds you so tightly might feel uncomfortable, but for you it's the most comfortable you've felt in a while. You bask in the way his scent and warmth envelops you. It's all so strangely familiar, yet you also had forgotten the way it felt to be wrapped in his arms. You wish with all your heart that you never had to forget in the first place.

"Why did you never reach out to me?" The words leave your lips so fast you surprise yourself. It could be seen as hypocritical asking this of Austin because why didn't you reach out? But the difference is, you always thought Austin never felt anything for you. You were under the impression he found his match and that was the end of it. You felt rejected only to find out there was something there all along. Why didn't he let you know sooner?

Austin takes a breath, sighing into the side of your head. It's obvious he has a lot to share with you, to explain. You want nothing more than to hear all of it and to have everything make sense. You’d sit with him all night if you have to.

Releasing his arms from around you, Austin takes a step back and softly turns you towards your table. He places a hand on the small of your back and leads you to your chair. The both of you sit down and you turn towards Austin to show him he has your full attention.

Unlike just a few moments ago, Austin looks anywhere but at you. He’s nibbling on his bottom lip and contemplating how he’s going to explain himself. There’s definitely a reason for the fact he didn’t try to contact you sooner, why he didn’t make more of an effort to keep in touch, why he didn’t fight for you.

He just doesn’t know how he’s going to explain it to you. Austin’s struggled to admit it to himself for so long, so admitting it to the woman it all has to do with is borderline terrifying for him.

“Aus,” you say, reaching out to give his hand a light squeeze. “It’s okay. You can talk to me, you know that.”

The blonde slowly raises his eyes to yours and sees how genuine your concern is. He can tell that you need this. It breaks his heart knowing how long he’s left you hanging without any explanation as to what he felt. Austin feels like an idiot over the fact you thought he felt nothing for you while the whole time it was the opposite.

All because of my own fears, he thinks, my own insecureties...

Austin shakes his head, essentially shaking off his nerves. He can't let them hold him back anymore. He can't let himself hold him back from going after what he really wants, who he really wants. Austin wants to be honest with you, he needs to.

"Y/N, I never reached out to you because I thought I wasn't good enough for you."

The statement practically knocks you over. Your head jolts back in confusion and your eyes go wide, disbelief clouding your features instantly. "Austin, why in the world would you think that?"

You don't want to diminish the importance and validity of Austin's feelings and fears, but the fact he believed he wasn't good enough for you is beyond mind-boggling.

A small smile tugs at a corner of Austin's lips, realization dawning on him that maybe it was a little silly to feel that way. But it's what he's always felt as soon as you left for your tv show, and he hasn't been able to shake it since.

"I-I don't know. You left the country and I saw how big your career was gettin' and I thought I wouldn't be able to compare, that you could do better, that you could be with someone more on your level. I know it may sound stupid but it's true. I also didn't want to come between your success or hold you back in any way. Trust me that not a day went by after we wrapped on Aliens that I didn't want to do better at stayin' in contact, but I figured with your big break that it was no use. You shouldn't have to choose between trying to make a relationship or your career work. So I just let it go. I let you go when I shouldn't have."

"Austin," your lip trembles as you try to not be consumed by your emotions. The fact he felt like this, no matter if it had even been a little bit, hurts your heart in a way you've never experienced before.

The actor lifts his hand in an effort to try and halt you feeling bad for him. "Sweetheart, please don't get upset over this, okay? It was all on me, I should've done something about it instead of keeping it from you back then. Lettin’ our relationship crumble is the worst thing I've ever done and I'm sorry.

"I thought after a few years that I had gotten over it. As you know I was in a committed relationship and I felt a good balance during it. I thought I had grown and that I could handle the fact my career wasn't at an extreme height compared to my partner's. So when that relationship ended I had a lot of time to reflect and figure out what it was I really wanted. I came back to America after filming Elvis and I swear to God when I stepped off that plane one of the first things I saw was a billboard with you on it for one of your new movies at the time.

"I figured this had to be some sorta sign or somethin'. But the more I kept thinkin' about it and figurin' out how I could reach out to you, the more I started to doubt myself. I felt like I was a teenager again questionin' if I was good enough for you. You were in all these huge films and seen with these other guys who are so much more successful than me, and I didn't know if you would even wanna talk to me considerin' how much time had passed."

Austin takes a breath, feeling like a weight has been lifted off his shoulders. It was a lot to admit, but letting you know exactly how he felt all these years is such a relief. He's kicking himself for not doing it sooner, for letting more time pass that he could've spent with you—as a friend at the very least.

He shouldn't have relied on possibly running into you at Ashley's parties, he should've just taken the leap and gotten your number. What's done is done though and there's no going back, but he sure as hell is gonna do everything he can to stay close with you going forward.

“Austin,” you start, feeling very much overwhelmed in both a good and bad way. No matter how you’re feeling though, you won’t allow Austin to think he’s inferior to you or that you wouldn’t want to talk to him because that’s so beyond far from the truth. “Never would I ever not wanna talk to you. If anything you’re one of the only people I’ve wanted to talk to these past few years. I’ve missed you like nobody’s business and I hate the fact you’ve ever felt anything less than equal when it comes to me and my success, and that those feelings forced you to stay away.

“No matter how many movies or shows I do, or what famous people I’m seen with, none of it will ever change the way I feel about you or make me see you in a different light. You’re one of, if not the, most honest and kind people I have ever met. I may not have known you for long way back then, but every single moment we spent together has stuck with me, and the way you treated me and made me feel has never left my mind. No one’s ever been as special to me as you were, Austin—as you are.”

The way Austin's eyes shine with emotion is indescribable. Somehow they get even more blue, a pale color you could get lost in for hours if given the chance. It's clear how impactful your words are on him, so you let him take a moment to just gather his thoughts.

"Y/N, I-I don't even know what to say," he chuckles, rubbing his fingers over his chin. "There aren't really enough words out there to describe how much that means to me, how much you mean to me. Gosh, m’just so sorry I let so much time pass between us and that I let my insecurities get the best of me."

You had begun shaking your head before Austin even finished what he was saying. "Don't be sorry. We both had our own part in everything and I would never hold that to you, especially when it comes to insecurities. I just hope you know how much I appreciate you being honest with me and letting me know everything. It definitely answers a lot of questions I had back then."

Austin nods his head and smiles lightly at you. It's a relief for him to know that helped you in some way. He knows finally letting it out absolutely helped him.

"And hey," you continue, a teasing tone poking through. "There's no way you can still feel like that, Mr. Elvis Presley himself! Like are you kidding me, Aus? That's incredible, I'm so proud of you and how far you've come. You deserve this so much and I know only a little bit has been shared, but I can just tell you're going to be amazing in that film. I can't wait to see it."

Your smile is wide as you watch Austin get shy, his cheeks reddening and his hand immediately rubbing the back of his neck. The sight makes you feel giddy.

"Thank you, Y/N/N. I appreciate that a lot. I really hope you do enjoy it when it comes out." There's a timid tone of pride as Austin says this. It's so surreal for him to think about how this film is actually real, and even more so that people are excited to see it. He's grateful for all the work he's ever done, but this is beyond his wildest dreams, and he can't wait for you to see it.

"You're welcome," you grin. "I'm sure I will."

There's a comforting stillness that surrounds you both for a few moments. The two of you just staring at each other fondly, feeling a fourteen year weight off your shoulders. It's a lot to take in all at once, especially after so much time, but it feels good and as if you're picking up right where you both left off. The questions and doubt you've carried for years finally roll off your back and you feel like you can start fresh with Austin, like things can be different after all.

"So, there's a lot to catch up on, isn't there?" Austin says, a coy smirk playing on the corner of his mouth.

"Yes, there is," you reply, settling more into your chair as you eagerly await the endless stories you know are coming.

"Where should we start?"

You ponder that question for a moment, thinking of where the best place to begin your catch up would be. It doesn't take long for the only correct answer to surface in your mind.

"How about right where we left off?" You suggest.

"Sounds perfect."

*****

You're not sure how much time has passed since you and Austin started reminiscing, but from the state of the gala around you—or at least what's left of it—it's been a while.

In the time you've spent chatting with Austin and getting to know who he is now, you realize just how aligned your lives have always been.

There's this little café in Los Angeles that you always pass by when you're out and about, and they have the best drinks and food you could imagine, so you stop there in the mornings before you start your day. Turns out Austin goes to the same place, except instead of in the morning, he goes at the end of his day right before he goes home.

Another thing was when Austin brought up how he saw your billboard when he got off the plane, it reminded you of how you had the same experience when you got back to LA from filming your tv show. While you were on your way home from the airport you saw a bus with an advertisement for the show he had been on at the time, The Carrie Diaries, and it had made you want to reach out to him as well. Of course you never did, though.

All of these things coming to light had made the two of you laugh so many times throughout your conversation. It was crazy to think about how many times you missed reuniting with each other, either unknowingly or knowingly.

Despite the time lost, you're honestly just grateful to be back in Austin's life now. Maybe him spilling his guts on national television wasn't so bad after all. Without it, you really might never have crossed paths again, even with being at the Met together.

"Austin," someone says off to the side of you. "I'm so sorry to interrupt, but Baz is making his way out and I figured you'd want to say goodbye before he leaves."

The voice is gentle and calm, and when you look up to see who it belongs to you nearly fall out of your seat. Priscilla Presley in the flesh. You have to bite the inside of your cheek to keep your jaw from dropping.

Austin basically startles, suddenly realizing where he is. He got so caught up in listening to your stories and telling his own that he completely forgot he was even at an event.

"Oh absolutely, thank you, Priscilla. I'll be right there, I'll be just a moment."

Priscilla smiles warmly at Austin, and then her gaze quickly shifts to you. You can feel her kindness and compassion without her even having to say anything. She looks back towards Austin and you watch as she reaches up and lightly squeezes his shoulder, a knowing look passing between them.

You wonder what it is she's communicating to him, but something tells you it has everything to do with Austin coming over here to speak with you. The thought makes you feel warm inside.

In an instant, Priscilla's gone and it's just you and Austin once more. You know he has to leave now to say his goodbyes, so you begin to stand up from your chair. Austin does the same.

"She seems amazing," you say, staring in the direction Priscilla set off towards. You catch a glimpse of her as she laughs at something Baz Luhrmann has said.

"Yeah, she's incredible," Austin gushes. "I'll have to introduce you two properly sometime."

There's a shyness in Austin as he awaits your response. He doesn't want to overstep or push you into anything. From what he can tell he thinks you want to be back in his life as much as he wants to be back in yours, but still he doesn't want to just assume that there will even be a next time between you two.

"I'd love that, Aus," you reassure. His blue eyes meet yours and you can see how happy he is. You're sure your eyes show the same.

Austin looks quickly towards his table and knows he doesn't have much time left with you, so he speaks up before any more time can pass between you. "There's somethn' I wanna ask you. It's somethin' I should've asked you about fourteen years ago."

An airy laugh passes your lips and your heart swells at the idea of what the blonde is about to ask, a familiar feeling settling in your bones. You nod your head for him to go on.

Austin leans in, a little flustered but somehow still exuding the utmost confidence. "Would you wanna go out with me sometime?"

There it is. The question you were hoping he'd ask you all those years ago. It sounds even better than you thought it would.

"You have no idea how much I wanted you to ask me that." Austin laughs and the sound practically rattles your body. You'd never get tired of it. "Of course I would."

Austin wastes no time in wrapping his arms around you, bringing you close to his chest and holding you there. Once again you find yourself basking in it, wishing you didn't have to say goodbye already. The fact this won't be the last time you see Austin keeps you happy, though. The fact you have a date with him really seals the deal.

"You ever feel like, I don't know, there's somethin' that ties two people together sometimes? Like they're always gonna be connected, that they were destined for each other or somethin'? Sort of like a-" Austin cuts himself off, trying to think of what it is he's referencing.

"Like an invisible string?" You beam, pulling back to look up at him, knowing precisely what he's getting at.

"Yeah, exactly," he murmurs, staring at you with such adoration you swear you could melt right here.

You lightly squeeze Austin's waist before whispering back to him, "Then yeah, I absolutely do."

*****

It's been a couple weeks since you reunited with Austin at the Met Gala. It had taken a bit of rescheduling and careful planning, but you two were finally able to go on that date, and to say it was one of the best nights of your life would be an understatement.

There was a small part of you that was worried you had exhausted your topics to discuss while at the Met, but the way you and Austin fell into an easy rhythm while going out felt incredible. He made you laugh more times than you could count and just being in his presence again after so long felt like a dream come true. You missed talking to him and feeling a genuine connection with someone.

So, you were ecstatic when he kissed you goodnight. There aren't really words to describe the way it feels to kiss Austin Butler. All you know is that it definitely left you dizzy and wanting more. Needless to say, you can't wait for your next date.

Now, you find yourself in what feels like a full circle moment. Just like Austin was over a month ago, you're sat with James Corden on The Late Late Show. Luckily, you're not playing Spill Your Guts or Fill Your Guts like Austin had, but you're sure the topic of the two of you will come up soon enough.

The internet was kind of a mess since the Met, even more so than it was before. Word got out that you and Austin had spent the night talking—with a few added assumptions—and it hasn't been the same since. When you got papped while out on your date, that's when it got even worse. It was all so crazy, but all you two really cared about at the end of the day was that you were finally together.

"So, Y/N, I have to ask," James turns the questions to you now instead of your fellow special guest. "There are a few rumors flying about you and a certain blonde heartthrob—care to comment?"

Scattered 'oh's and 'ah's make their way across the audience and your heartbeat picks up a little at the sound. You knew this was coming, but it still makes you feel a little nervous. This relationship between you and Austin is fairly new, even if you have known each other for over a decade, but it's special and you'd hate to make it out to be something it's not.

"What would you like to know, James?" You're willing to throw a bone here and there, it's not like you and Austin are keeping your relationship a secret. You'll only dish out a little, but then it's lips sealed, at least for a little while longer.

"Anything, really. I mean is it true you and Austin reconnected at the Met and then proceeded to go out on a date?" James scoots forward in his chair a little, as if not wanting to miss a single thing you say.

You nod your head, that's obvious enough. Not too personal. It takes a quick search of your names over the past few weeks to connect those dots. "Yeah, it's true. The Met was actually the first time we saw each other in person in fourteen years. It was pretty crazy."

James and the audience react accordingly, finding that little tidbit to be fascinating. It kind of is, in a way. "That is pretty crazy! You know when Austin was on the show a while back and he said you were his celebrity crush, I was just so happy. I knew you guys had worked together a long time ago, so the idea of a reconciliation just seemed so cute to me."

"Thank you! Yeah it was great to meet up with him again. We definitely had a lot to catch up on, and I guess I really have you to thank for that considering it was Austin's comment on the show that sort of set everything in motion," you smile.

The host laughs and then grins before pretending to brush off dust on his shoulders. "Well you know they do say I tend to bring out the best in people. It's a gift, matchmaking."

Everyone laughs and James claps his hands together before shaking his head. "No, I'm joking, but really, Y/N, congratulations on everything. I know it's a tricky subject to bring up so I'll leave it at that, but I'm happy for you and wish you all the best."

"Thank you very much, James, I appreciate that." The man smiles at you before a thought appears to dawn on him.

"Okay wait I lied. I have one more question and then I'm done with you, I swear." You bust out laughing, along with everyone else, and shake your head at him.

"Sure, hit me with it," you giggle, interested to know where this is going.

"Y/N,” James pauses, building up the anticipation in the room. “Who is your celebrity crush?"

You don't even hesitate.

"Austin Butler."

[justkending]

Finding Memories. Chapter 11.

Series Summary: Waking up with little to no memory of her past, and being saved by a group of individuals who call themselves heroes, sends a long time captive for a whirlwind trying to find some form of grounding in this world she quickly learns runs on chaos. But she’s not the only one trying to figure out her forgotten backstory. Bucky Barnes, along with the other Avengers, can’t help but sense that there is a lot more to the whole situation than a diagnosis of amnesia. Her background slowly starts to come forward in pieces of her past and hidden information discovered. Who is she? And why was she in the room they were meant to destroy?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader 

Word Count: 3200+

TW: Torture, cussing, and blood. 

A/N: I just want to say thank you for the messages:) They really helped make me feel like I wasn’t stressing any of ya’ll out. BUT I am VERY HAPPY to say that I finally started getting back into the natural flow of writing for this story. I think it helps I found an amazing fanfic on Wattpad recently, here’s the link, and it’s helped motivate me and give me inspiration :) I think reading similar writing styles are for sure a nice little cure to writer’s block when you need it most. Anyway, I’m already working on chapter 12 and hope to have it out soon. Also, I promise some Bucky and Y/N scenes are coming up soon, but I needed this chapter to build up to it;) XOOXOOXOOXOXOOX

Chapter 11:

Putting two and two together, the position of where the scent and sounds had been coming from, and the direction of Y/N’s room... Someone was watching her.

He was so one track minded he didn’t even remember the record breaking sprint he made to Y/N’s room. But as soon as his eyes saw the door in front of him, he realized rushing in while in a frenzy probably wasn’t the best idea considering she was already on edge as it was. If he came in a panic, she would no longer have her room feel like a safe space. Especially if she figured out why he was panicked. 

Luckily, he knew Y/N didn’t lock her door, so he quietly opened it and was careful not to startle anyone on the other side of it. 

And sure enough, Y/N was fast asleep in her bed, unbothered. 

He couldn’t leave without checking the balcony locks and making sure any entry point besides the bedroom door was impossible to break into.

Without waking her, and still doing a whole room security check, he found it all secure. 

He knew he needed to leave so he wasn’t invading her personal space, but a part of him didn’t feel comfortable doing that. But she was safe and there was nothing he could do but be there in close proximity for now. 

He went back to his room, grabbed his computer and quickly hacked into the security system. As he checked the cameras, he sat himself along the wall in the shared hallways of their rooms. 

Sat up against the wall and in easy view of Y/N’s door, he began investigating the perimeter cameras for anything out of the ordinary. 

There was nothing of concern to come across the screen within the last few days, up to the point of late afternoon present day. 

Some agents and other workers had walked on the trail, but none of them ventured off into the manicured lawn. A few gardners came through, but they were spraying the lawn and not actually doing much gardening. 

The tree line was hard to see through in the night's low lighting, but he did see the playback of him running and stopping. 

He rewinded it a few times trying to see if he could see the movement that caught his attention in the first place, but nothing gave away what he seemed to have heard. 

He watched himself investigate and look around the tree line a few times before he came up empty. But after playing it for the 6th time, he noticed a movement in the corner of the screen barely making the picture. 

He zoomed in and messed with the lighting to try and get a better look at the anomaly. The bush on the edge of the screen moved in an interesting way.

It wasn’t something as simple as the wind because it looked like the leaves had been pushed away for someone to move around, but there was no one to have done it. 

He couldn’t seem to process reasoning for the bush to move the way it did. 

“Hey, what are you doing out here?” Wanda asked, just now getting back to her room. 

He looked up surprised by her presence, as he thought everyone was in bed for the night since it was late. He released his breath seeing it was just her and no one else. 

She looked to Y/N’s door then back to him. 

“You ok?” she asked, genuinely. 

“I’m ok,” he tried to brush off his anxiety of the night. “What are you doing up?” 

“Was running an errand,” she lied. “Why are you up? And why are you just hanging out in the hallway instead of your room that’s two doors down?” She joined his position along the wall and slid down to sit next to him. 

“I went for a run and needed to check some of the security cameras.” He wasn’t lying, but he also wasn’t giving her all of the truth. 

She waited for him to go on and explain the random research, but he just kept clicking things on his computer and continuing on his self-proclaimed mission. 

“Is this the part where you tell me why, or do I have to peek into that head of yours?” she asked, with a friendly nudge. 

He smiled some at her teasing and appreciated the joke to ease some of the tension from the given scenario. 

“After I went to the gym, I decided to go for a late night run around the compound. I needed to clear my head of some things,” he explained, and she nodded following along. “When I went along the backside of the perimeter, I thought I heard something along the treeline that way,” he pointed toward Y/N’s side of the hall, showing the direction of where he was at. 

“Did you see anything?” she furrowed her eyebrows. 

“No. That’s the issue,” he grumbled, clicking more keys on the computer and trying to get different angles of the spot. “But I know something was there,” he said in a determined manner. 

“Did you hear anything else after the first time?”

He paused thinking about it. “Kind of, but the wind was strong enough that I couldn’t differentiate it from things moving in the wind or someone trying to hide.”

“And nothing on the camera either?” 

He moved the laptop for her to see better and played back the only piece of evidence he could find. She watched it a few times and Bucky noticed she had grown a look of confusion like he had. 

“Did that plant move?” she asked. 

“This one?” he pointed to it. 

“Yeah,” she nodded. 

“That’s what I’m trying to figure out. Can’t tell if my brain is just seeing what it wants, or if there is something actually there.” 

“Something seems like it’s there,” she said in an intrigued tone. “Play it again.”

They watched it a few more times and still weren’t positive about what they were seeing. 

“I want to write it off as nothing to worry about,” he paused. “I don’t think it’s nothing.”

“Why’s that?” She was curious. 

“The placement of where I thought the noise came from had a perfect view of the rooms on this side of the hall,” he motioned to Y/N’s side and Wanda’s side of the building. “And after looking a little closer, it has a really good view of Y/N’s balcony and into some of her windows. Whoever was out there, chose a spot that would be discrete, yet give them all kinds of access to Y/N’s privacy. I don’t think the placement was random.”

___________________________________

Bucky ended up staying near Y/N’s room until early the next morning and when he heard her wake up through the door. He quickly made his way back to his room for a shower and a change of clothes before going to his next assignment of the day. 

The only thing giving him some form of peace about Y/N’s security was knowing Wanda was in the loop of his worries and had promised that once she was up, she would be with her for most of the day and keep an eye on her for him. 

After the shower and feeling a tad bit put together, he was headed to the med bay. 

The first person he knew to ask about the strange occurrence wasn’t any of the Avengers. It was someone who knew a thing or two about spying on Y/N.

“Sergeant Barnes, I wasn’t expecting you to drop by today,” Alma, the head nurse that practically ran the place, raised an eyebrow at the super soldier as he walked in with a task at hand. “Anything I can help you with?”

“I need to speak to the woman who we talked to yesterday. Were you ever able to get a name on her?” Bucky asked, looking in the room behind her as if she would magically be there. 

“Ava,” Alma responded after a second. “And she’s not here. Got released this morning.” Bucky gave an uneasy look. “Not released, released,” she emphasized. “They moved her to a holding room. She’s still under our jurisdiction and is going to be questioned later.”

“Level 10 or 11?” he asked, already making his way to the elevator.  

“Ten,” she answered in a shout as he was halfway down the hall already. 

He nodded and went on to his next stop. 

In his rush, he didn’t notice Tony coming from around the corner behind Alma. His hands in his pockets and a curious and intrigued look on his face. 

“Who was he looking for?” Tony asked Alma who was now busied by a chart she had grabbed. 

She looked up at him in a quick glance then went back to the paperwork in front of her. 

“Ava, or that woman who was the second attacker the other night at the museum,” she answered truthfully. 

“What about the one I just talked to?” he pushed on. 

“Is she still unresponsive?” Alma questioned like it was an obvious answer. 

Again, she had been around the Avenger’s long enough to have an attitude with them and not have to worry about getting reassigned to a new job. It was also one of the main reasons they kept her around. She was the only other person stubborn enough outside of their group to put up with them. 

“If by unresponsive you mean no longer throwing things at people when they come in to question her, then yes. She’s unresponsive. Though I’m sure the straight-jacket she’s in may be playing a part in her silent treatment,” Tony said with a sassy judgy look in his eyes. 

“Cool it, Stark,” she rolled her eyes, pulling the clipboard to her chest and looking at him with a tired look. “If you had to be here close to all hours of the day with patients who don’t want to be here and are brainwashed 50% of the time, you too would put one of the physically harmful patients into something that kept you from changing scrubs every 30 minutes with another yogurt, saline, and bodily liquids accident on you.” 

“You speaking from experience?” 

His question was sarcastic and ended with a shit-eating grin that Alma knew all too well. He knew that even if she claimed to not be in the mood for his type of humor a majority of the time, she was happy to have some of the relief from frustrating shifts that were daily occurrences. 

“Is she still playing the quiet game?” She went on to ask with the slightest smirk on her face she actively tried to hide by looking back at the paperwork in front of her. 

“Only person to beat her out would be Morgan when I ask her why there’s permanent markers drawn all along the halls of the house,” Tony sighed. “But the girl, Ava, she is talking?” 

“Last I heard, yes. She has a completely different discourse to this whole situation. If you ask me, I think something made that girl snap out of whatever loyalty the other one has toward whoever hired them,” Alma sighed before tapping another nurse that passed by and handed her the chart, mumbling some tasks for her to do. “She hasn't thrown a bowl full of luke-warm clam chowder soup into my bra at any point in her stay, so I’d say I prefer her.”

“Bleck,” Tony shivered at the thought. “No wonder she threw it on you. Who would want hospital clam chowder?” 

“Is there anything else I can help you with Tony, or are you just going to keep haggling with me about the various types of liquids I go home covered in?” she said with a quirked eyebrow and hand on her hip. 

“You deserve a raise,” he pointed, walking backwards after passing her. “Just checked with the boss,” he raised a finger as if waiting for an answer. “Done. Congrats and thank you for your service.”

“I’m still expecting that Christmas Bonus,” she waved him off, walking back to her round. 

“How do you feel about unlimited soup in the hospital cafeteria?” he shouted her way after reaching the elevators. 

“I think that sounds like me quitting more than it does getting a bonus,” she flipped him the bird before turning the corner and disappearing. 

______________________________

As Bucky was heading to his new location, he called Steve asking him to meet him there. He had just entered the room they waited in before getting to the cell the girl was in. 

Less than 30 seconds later, Steve was already walking through the door. 

“Hey, what’s going on?” he asked, looking at Bucky in a worried way and then at the glass that separated them from her. 

She had no clue they were there since she couldn’t see through the double sided glass. 

Bucky was quick to inform Steve of his discoveries and concerns after his late night run and went onto discuss his questions he needed answered. 

Steve was there mainly to have a second set of ears in his talk with the girl and for a second perspective. 

“Ava?” Steve questioned when they entered the room. 

She was lying on top of a comfortable cot that was placed in the corner and was staring up at the ceiling with a concentrated look on her face before hearing the lock on the door click. 

“Captain America,” she responded, sitting up quickly and doing her best to be respectful even though inside she was terrified to see the two again. 

“Please, call me Steve,” he waved her off.

He could hear her heartbeat racing at the anxiety that was not knowing the reason for their presence again. She had become used to agents and other workers hauling her around, and hadn’t really talked to the two Avengers besides the first night here. 

“A-Are you sure?” 

She was truly surprised by the kindness he was giving her. He didn’t look like he was here to interrogate or torture her. Hell, there would be no reason to as she would tell them anything they wanted to know. 

Steve nodded with a small smile as he moved into the room, moving a seat in the chair they had by a desk in the corner and flipped it around before sitting. 

Her set-up had been a nicer one since she had been nothing but cordial to all that had helped with her. She hadn’t proven to be the enemy besides the night at the museum and she claims she didn’t want any part of it to begin with. 

“Sergeant Barnes,” she nodded his way, not sure what else to call him since the Winter Soldier was more of a form of slander in ways. Bucky didn’t correct her, but however nodded in agreement. “Is everything ok?” 

“We came down to ask you a few questions that came up,” Steve replied. “If you can help us, great. If not, well… We’d appreciate it even if you tried.”

“There’s not too much I can tell you about my bosses. At least who they are specifically if that’s what you’re asking. They’ve asked me multiple times since coming here, but I don’t have any memory of who they are.” Bucky and Steve shared a look. “I only really have memories of what they did.” 

Her nerves tensed quickly after she hinted at the torture they were sure of her to have gone through, the look in her eyes just proved their guesses. 

“I’m sorry,” Steve said softly, saddened for the girl who sat in front of them. “Unfortunately, what we have questions about may connect to those things. Do you think you can help us still?”

She hesitated but nodded timidly. 

“I can do my best,” she answered him before turning to Bucky more. “I promise that I didn’t want to do anything I did, so anything that could help that girl we were hired to kidnap-...” The words coming out were more upsetting as they were vocalized. “I would like to help where I can.”

Once again they could tell she was telling the truth. Whatever manipulation this young woman had been through was clearly something she was trying to process herself. 

_________________________

After their talk with Ava, they learned that Y/N was most likely not the only person in the facility to have mutations. From their research, and from confirmation from a prisoner within the walls itself, their work revolved around finding the strongest mutant they could.

By default, they came to terms Y/N was probably their strongest project if she was in the room labeled, HIGH VOLUME WEAPON. HIGH CLEARANCE PERSONAL ONLY.

On top of that, there were no other mutants within that facility that they knew of. Which proved the point they already knew to be possible, there were more facilities out there they hadn’t infiltrated yet. 

Throughout the last week Natasha, Steve, Sam, Tony, and Rhodey had been sent on side missions when a possible hit had been made on another underground science lab like the one Y/N had been saved from. However, each time they came up with empty and abandoned buildings and on a few occasions, labs that knew nothing of the higher order other than to send their research to them. 

Ava had mentioned that most, if not all, bounty hunters, spies, and muscle men sent to complete jobs like the one she had been on, were enhanced in some way. Sometimes as simple as extra strength or slightly more enhanced agility on top of highly trained combat skills. 

Other times it could range from invisibility, telekinesis, x-ray vision, being able to change the density of one's body, and the list went on. But those types weren’t usually sent unless it was a bigger job. 

However, when asked why she and her partner had been sent instead of someone with more power if Y/N was such an enhanced person, she shrugged. 

“I couldn’t really tell you. I know before we went in for the job, they injected us with something. Made our adrenaline high and all my normal strengths seemed to be heightened. Maybe they thought the sedatives would work and they didn’t have to worry about us having to hold our own,” she replied, hoping that would help some. “Truthfully, I don’t see any form of advantage to sending just two trained fighters with a syringe in rather than the other, but they sent us either way. ”

That was a hard one to understand as her job seemed to be doomed before it started. 

After most of the mission talk was had, Steve was kind and asked if they had been treating her well and if she needed anything. 

She was grateful for the sympathy and reassured him that no one had been ill-willed toward her even though she was in for the reasons that she was. 

“They have every right to be, but they’ve been very hospitable,” she smiled softly at him. “And truthfully, I don’t mind being here. It’s a lot better than the places I’ve known and I know I’ll be safe in these walls.” 

She seemed to say that in a way that she was trying to convince herself. She truly wanted to be safe in these walls. 

“I’m glad you feel that way. If you need anything though, just let anyone of us know. We really do appreciate your help,” Steve nodded, walking to the door following after Bucky. 

She thanked him and the door hissed as it locked behind him. 

When he came out, he saw Bucky frozen with a glare on his face. He followed his eyeline and saw Tony sat across the room at the table that overlooked the cell’s window inside, leaning back in his chair and arms crossed. His signature sunglasses, red in tint, showed his expression perfectly in those brown eyes of his.  

The red tint doing something to give him a gleam of gratification at the scenario.

“Tony.”

Feel free to follow me on Wattpad too and vote on any of your favorite chapters:) It helps promote my story & also makes my brain release tons of endorphins everytime I get a notification about one of ya’ll❤️

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[sarcasticfina]

I posted 2,616 times in 2022

18 posts created (1%)

2,598 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@absentlyabbie

@fullmetalfisting

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I tagged 2,606 of my posts in 2022

#queue queue ca choo - 2,532 posts

#[text] - 746 posts

#series: 911 - 307 posts

#tv: 911 - 293 posts

#[twitter] - 229 posts

#otp - 225 posts

#eddie diaz - 181 posts

#evan buckley - 180 posts

#light of my life - 134 posts

#buddie - 107 posts

Longest Tag: 105 characters

#tho i find indigenous to be a very large umbrella depending on what country of origin we're talking about

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

I wanted to congratulate you on quitting! I know it’s a scary thing to go through but you will be so much happier in the long run! And I really hope your next job is one you love 💛

ref post

thank you! <3

this is 5 months late, but i just wanted to let everyone know that quitting really was the best thing i've ever done. the sheer amount of relief i had at leaving an incredibly toxic working environment that was just filled with a lot of lateral violence and an abusive manager. i sometimes miss my coworkers and the clients, but how i felt 5 months ago, not just about my job but about life in general, is vastly different to how i feel today.

i found a wonderful job that i love, that i'm good at, and that has just embraced me whole-heartedly. it's supportive, the work is fulfilling, and my team of coworkers and management are all fantastic. it helps too that i got a $5 raise, which means that i can comfortably pay my bills, create a safety cushion, and send money to my sister who has been dealing with a lot of medical issues.

my head is clearer and i'm feeling so, so good about the transition. it was scary as hell to walk away from a job i'd been doing for 4.5 years but it was so worth it and i'm so grateful that i did.

20 notes - Posted July 21, 2022

#4

fic: i'm not yours (but i can be for a night) category: harry potter ship: hermione granger/james potter rating: explicit/nc-17 prompt: pictured above tags: marauders!era; friends with benefits; first time word count:  9,806

preview:

Hermione reached an elbow over and bumped his. "What did you want to ask me?"

"Uh…" A flush filled James' face. "It's kinda personal. I probably shouldn't."

Hermione's eyes narrowed curiously. "How personal?"

"Just… I guess I was wondering if I was the only one in our year that hasn't… That's still…" He glanced at her and then away. "Everyone I know has already had, uh…"

"Sex?" Hermione couldn't help a beat of surprise. "You haven't then?"

"Have you?" he blurted nervously.

Hermione watched the pink fusing his cheeks turn even darker. "No."

read more: ao3 ↳ please try to leave a comment / kudos!

23 notes - Posted August 31, 2022

#3

i've been on tumblr for like a decade or so now, and for the most part that's been a good experience. i stick to my fandoms and my mutuals and i write my fic. every once in a while, discourse wanders my way and i get to decide to engage or not. i have no interest in engaging currently. the very idea of arguing with people over something we either love or hate in opposing fashion sounds and is exhausting. so, i fully invite anyone who just doesn't like or agree with me to block me. it doesn't have to be deep. we like/think/want/feel different things and there's this nifty option to never see/hear from each other again that can only improve both of our lives. so like... do that. ✌️

36 notes - Posted August 27, 2022

#2

finally quit a job that was sucking the life out of me

62 notes - Posted February 25, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

this whole time i thought blorbo was another fandom ya’ll were in and not a term of endearment for characters you like. that word scrapes the soft tissue of my brain. it makes me think of minions and my feral little mind wants to ritualistically sacrifice it to a pagan god.

180 notes - Posted August 31, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[seawing-vibes]

In The Arena - WoF AU

Word Count - 1,086

Tw - Death Mention & implication of War

It was another foul day in the Sky Kingdom, Princess Burn had decided to grace the Kingdom with her all important presents, she often visited for grand occasions but I couldn't think of any important events that should conspire today. The warm air of midday baked down on my scales, despite being trapped in the confines of the Skywing Prison for two years now, I still would never get used to the constant rays of sunlight on my scales. Chains clanged against one another as I walked alongside a lanky Skywing guard, my wings had been binded and chains attached my legs together, so I knew I was being carted to another arena fight.

Not again, I'll convince them this time. I thought, nieve hope making me hold my head up high. Two days prior I was pitted against a well muscled Icewing, so far I had been able to convince all but one prisoner to stop fighting and defy the tyrannical Queen Scarlet, but the Icewing didn't listen to my pleads, and I was forced to murder them. The memory made me feel queasy, it was my second murder in this twisted enviorment and that number was far too high for my likings.

Suddenly the guard and I came to a halt, the sun had been blocked out by a high arched ceiling, we were under the stairs of the arena. I felt adrenalin flood my senses and make my heart beat faster at the thought of the battle to come, carefully the guard unlocked the shackles that bind my legs. I nodded thankfully to him, I’ve been trying my best to get on the guards good sides, but clearly that strategy had been failing for none of them had aided my attempted escapes. The guard stepped back to the entrance of the small area we were stuck in together, blocking the exit so I couldn’t escape. Excited shouts and screams from watching dragons made it hard to hear the Prince Vermillion rattle off his announcements. Vermillion was the one to announce the dragons who would be pitted against each other, I’ve become sick of hearing his voice.

I cocked my head, trying my best to listen in on who I may be “fighting” this go around, through the rumble of the crowd I could just barely make out the words, “...nami .. Sea … ings!” From Vermillion, a Seawing, I was battling a Seawing. Suddenly that original feeling of naive hope became a feeling of pure excitement and triumphant, even before the battle had been started. However long I had been trapped here, however long Scarlet would confine me in her disgusting view of entertainment, my subjects would alway know me, and no matter the circumstance I will never harm one of my citizens and they would never do the same to me.

I approached the entrance to the arena, excitement buzzing through my body, I awaited Vermillion to announce my name. “...GILL OF THE SEAWINGS!” The young Prince shouted, the crowd roared excitedly, they had seen my battles in the past and had been enthralled by them.

Clouds of sandy dust puffed up around my talons as I stepped out into light of the arena, hundreds of dragons, Skywings and Sandwings alike piled up in the bleachers, gazing down on the two Seawings who would kill each other for their amusement. I instinctively looked up to the Queen’s throne, my eyes locked with Queen Scarlets, her face warped into a cruel grin. The howls of the crowd reduced to mindless noise in my mind as I turned my head to face my opponent, in an instant all that excitement and energy I felt before was washed away. I felt like I had been hit with a giant wave and was still recovering from the blow. My legs trembled as I stared at this dragon, no, dragonet, standing before me. Her scales were dark blue and her underbelly was a pale cerulean complimented by light green glowing scales, the spitting image of Queen Coral, my wife.

I took a shaker step back as I blinked in bewilderment, staring at the young dragoness that stood before me. I haven’t gone insane...have I? I thought, I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the dragoness. For a second I thought they must have been one of my son’s, but none of my sons resembled Coral that closely, and she had to be too old to be Anemone? And in that moment that wave came back to crash over my head, a puff of air escaped my mouth as a sense of pure bliss overwhelmed me, this must be the daughter Webs stole from us.

Shouts and roars grew louder and more aggressive as the two Seawings relaxed from a battle stance. The dragonets face had originally taken an aggressive and defensive forum, but after my epiphany her face relaxed into a simple scowl, “I don’t want to fight you!” She shouted above the thunderous noise of the angry crowd. Emotions threatened to overwhelm me in that fleeting moment, she shared my morals, and I didn’t even have to raise her to influence her ethics, and I wouldn’t have to fight my daughter.

“Y-yes! I don’t wish-sh to fight either!” I managed to choke out, pride and joy tangled in my chest as a smile was shared between the webbed dragons. Ignoring the enraged booing of the crowd, all I focused on was the soft relief that was shown on the other dragons face, and the pure joy I felt knowing that no blood would be spilt on the sands today.

[brutallyhonesttarotwitch]

Hello my loves!! thanks for all the support in my previous posts! it has been really heart-warming!🥺♥️,okayy so I have a new reading for y’all and do suggest me more topics that you will like to see 🦋

Which Harry Potter couple do you and your future soulmate/spouse mirror with♥👀🪄

Choose your pile intuitively,check out other piles if you don’t feel a connection,hope you enjoy ♥️ Okayy lets get to it no time to waste!!!👻

Piles♥️🪄

Pile 1 🪄🫀🕊🥺

Hello my pile one loves! Are you excited for your reveal!So the couple that you and your person will mirror with is Cho and Cedric!! So before getting all the negative thoughts let me explain.Cho and Cedric were the “it” couple in the whole Harry Potter franchise! like they both were soo perfect for each other ! even when Harry had eyes for Cho,she had only hers for Cedric! So I can see that people around you will look at you and your future spouse as the perfect power couple and they can never imagine anyone else with y’all.You guys will leave an impression that you guys are meant to be Ya know! (Awe🥺) But let me warn ya’ll there will also be some jelly people who will try to ruin your bond,since we have a third party situation here.So be careful loves,a pure love should be gaurded.You guys have to validate each others feelings and should grow your bond! you guys will have a long lasting relationship unlike Cho and Cedric since we don’t have Lord You-know-who in our universe(thank God!) I can also see your person being hella attractive 🥵! good for ya boo #onlyyours.

Pile 2 👀 🦋♥️⛓

Soo Pile 2 lovies! ready for your reveal! The song Love is a b- song by Two feets just started playing from my playlist,so that explain the amount of intensity you and your future spouse will have.Anywhoo you guys have Ginny and Harry! One of the most loved couples!My potterheads know how much people fangirl/boy this couple! So anyways you guys will have a slowpaced love in the sense just like Harry and Ginny ,you guys might be friends at first and slowly work your way through love and relationship.People around will know that something is going in between ya’ll like they all will be like “These two will be a perfect match but why aren’t they dating? just start dating!!” This is the vibe I am picking up with the cards that I have got.There will be a lot of encouragement from your loved ones,cause they want the best for you! and when you have the best suitor for your heart ! They want to see you happy and in the right hands(Omg too cute🥺♥️) I can feel for most of Y’all you guys have already met and even know of who I am referring to.Don’t worry they will be yours no matter how many gf or bfs Harry and Ginny had,they threw it all away and became one at the end!So patience is the key for this divine bond to work ♥🦋#soulmates.

Pile 3 💞❄️🧚🏼✨

Hi pile 3 lovies!!! excited for your reveal! so you guys got Neville and Luna!! So I understand,they both didn’t have much of screen time in the movies but there is much more to their relationship! Like let me explain,people will maybe try to make you and your future spouse feel down,there is a lot of negative and toxic people around y’all just giving a quick heads up! anywhoo Neville and Luna are these out of the box and unique people.They never actually fitted in,they never will and thats why they are unique and beautiful ✨🦋Likewise you and your soulmate are these unique souls who love peace as much as you guys love each other,your person will have a major glow up just before meeting you,just like how Neville had got his courage in the finale of Harry Potter.They wanna protect you and fight for you.They aren’t afraid to change for you and they dont ever wanna see anyone hurt you ! You can save or gaurd yourself if course ! but they wanna stand next to you against all the toxic and negative people! (🥺)I keep getting children in my mind! You might end up having children(if you are interested) or even get married with this person,cause their heart is too good to pass!♥️#Toodivine.

Pile 4 ♥️🔥🍷🎠

Pile 4 Angels!!! So excited for your reveal!! you guys got the most popular couple in the wholee franchise! Guessed who? Freaking Ron & Hermoine!!! The most dynamic duo! You and your person mirror this couple soo much! I can see one of you is really smart!!! just like Hermoine and the other is a wee bit clumsy like Ron(hehe😜) anywhoo humor is something that will be prevalent in you guys relationship! laughing to inside jokes ,having deep conversations and even teaching one and another about new stuff.Having this beautiful bond but lemme say something you both will definitely have these cat fights! (ntg serious just play fights) Like you can be a dog person and he/she can be a cat person! so see thats a brew for future fights,you guys are the defintion of opposites attract! I do sense that one of the person will be insecure a bit ,I am sensing that it can be you,lyk sometimes getting insecure asking questions like”This is too good to be true?”, “Why are they with me?”,”Maybe I am not good enough..?” (Awe honey no you are great ♥️🥺) Don’t worry they will take you in their arms and look into your eyes giving that validation that “Baby you are everything that I ever wanted”..They will adore you just how Ron and Hermoine adored each other secretively.#Truelove.

Anyways loves thats all for today♥️ hope you all enjoyed this reading♥️See you all in my next reading✨🪄

[insufferablelust]

Hi I adore your writing I was hoping if you could,maybe write about Matthew and how he’s such a goofy,kind person always smilin and soft but behind closed doors he’s a rough,sadist dom and one day while you guys are out you’re teasing and being bratty and he keeps smiling and laughing with all his fans but you notice the little lip twitch and sadistic glint in his eyes and when you’re finally home; no mercy, spitting, face slapping, degradation but in that teasing coo just absolute filth pls 🥰

THRILLED (I) Matthew x Reader

Warnings : Heavy heavy heavy smut, with heavy degradation, rough bdsm setting, sadist!mgg, public setting (exhibitionism), face slapping, spitting, um.. oh! squirting, mentions of edging, pain kink, just.. its filthy, please please read with discretion.

NOTE THAT THIS IS A FANTASY ONLY, IM NOT REFLECTING THE ACTUAL CHARACTERS BEHAVIOR ON REAL LIFE, ITS A FANTASY ONLY. ITS JUST A FICTION. IF YOU ARE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH THESE THINGS PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT READ.

Masterlist here! Let me know if ya’ll are interested in part 2.

it’s thrilling, the fact that you know him that well is thrilling. Know that the person you’re seeing right now is only a part of him, the part of him that he let others see, the part of him that takes you to cute dates, the part of him that hold you hand tightly sometimes kissing your knuckles as you walk through the park. It’s a part of him that everyone get to have a taste of— yet deep deep down there’s something darker, something that only you could handle, something that he only trusts you to know, something primal— a need.

When you first met Matthew, you hadn’t thought about him that way— as an actual sadist. You are a friend of Paget’s and she was the one that introduced you to Matthew. First dates were cute, themeparks, cafes, movies, ice skatings— all the clichés. However, 3 Months into your relationship, you discovered the other side of Matthew.

The side that had you whimpering at the sole thought of him, the side that you worshipped on your knees every damn night, the side that you were first introduced by an accidental mouth off incident— well it wasn’t necessarily accidental, in fact you did act bratty on purpose, you wanted to see just how far he would take it,

And oh boy, did he take it far..

~~~

You were nothing but a whining, whimpery, shaky mess when he was done with you. It was like your nerves were exposed, it was like you were actually in heaven, The pain was almost bearable— the ones delivered from the smack of his palm on your ass, the ones delivered from his teeth sunken onto your neck, the one from his belt, so on.. so forth.

But with the pain, comes the pleasure.. oh they did come alright, you never thought that you could orgasm so many times before that night, you never thought you could be that soaked, soaking wet before that night, you never thought you would crave the feeling of his fingers shoved down your throat, cock railing your cunt like a mad man, and his voice... oh that voice of his that belittled you, it sent nothing but excitement, thrill, and you fucking love it.

Thrilling, you were thrilled as you smile at him, he was taking pictures with few fans you both met on the park today. What they didn’t know was that, your Matthew was just telling you what he would do to you tonight for not wearing any panties whilst you both strolling down on the park when they called him and ask for a picture.

You let out an amused giggle, as you watch his lips twitched, his fist balled a little too tightly, and his eyes harden at the sound of your cute giggles. You were enjoying this, he could tell— he could tell very well, and if you thought you’re getting away with this, oh how you are wrong sweetheart.

“Do you want me to shove you up that tree and mark your ass senseless?” He smiled gently, as he caressed your cheeks— your eyes widen at him, alarmingly looking around to see the girls had backed up and went back to wherever they came from, you turned your gaze back to him slowly when he harshly pinched your chin and kiss the edge of your lips,

“Guess not, so shut the fuck up or i swear i’ll edge you six ways to sunday, little one.” He said the last bit with a mocking tone. For anyone, it were to appear that he was whispering something sweet probably, or something dirty perhaps, but definitely not about beating your ass til its purple, yet you were drenched, so drenched that you could feel it dripping down slowly, so slowly down your thighs

“Matth-“

“Ah ah, taught you better than that.”

“Sir.. Pleaae, i..” You tiptoed slightly before hugging him close and whisper on his ears “Dripping d-down my legs.” He chuckled, laughed even before pouting a bit, pressing your foreheads together “Fucking slut, too mindless to know your damn place, get in the car.”

~

The car ride back home was brutal, his fingers shoved inside your cunt, precisely 3 of them as you seated with your head cushion adjusted so it allows him to fuck you with his fingers, the pace was unforgiving but so were his words that drove you crazy. He placed the seatbelt on your body as a way to keep you restrained as he continues on makin you cum.

“Just imagine what everyone would think if they had the chance to see you like this, hm? to see you practically fucked braindead with only my fingers.” You moaned, moaned so loud as he sped up, furiously trying to get you both home safe as well as finger the living soul out of you.

“Gonna make sure you fuckin learn your lesson tonight, doll. Gonna make sure you won’t prance around outside without your damn panties like a cheap whore that you are for me. You understand that, bunny? or are you too much of a mindless brat that needs her cunt filled all the time to think huh?”

You came, you came then so hard, so hard that you squirted on his expensive leather car-seat. The air around you were buzzing, you were trembling and your mind were fuzzy, so fucking fuzzy that you bit down on his arm.

Your boyfriend just made you cum like a maniac in his car, and you knew for a fact that was only the appetizer for the night.

And you’re, Thrilled.

~

Alright! this is the new fic i was talking about, its an mgg fic and please note that its only a fantasy! i’m going to see how ya’ll respond to this, please send in feedback so i’ll know! thank you to the person who requested, you made me feel inspired again! ily all!

[andreafmn]

I’m Not Afraid - Chapter 2

Word Count: 4,585

Characters: Female Reader Argent Character, Original Male Argent Character, Derek Hale, Allison Argent, Scott McCall, Stiles Stilinski, Isaac Lahey, Lydia Martin, Chris Argent, Jackson Whittemore

Story Description: (Y/N) Argent arrived at Beacon Hills to put to rest her father’s sister, Kate Argent. For the first time, her family has decided to settle down and sustain a life in this interesting small town. After 17 years, (Y/N) has the opportunity to establish interpersonal relationships but will she be ready to face the complications that come with relating to her cousin’s, Allison, friends; especially, the infamous Derek Hale. She will face the adventure of being associated with the Derek and McCall pack as well as being faced with the discovery of certain aspects of her life she never imagined.

*DISCLAIMER* I do not own in any way Teen Wolf, all credits of the pre-established characters, script, and storyline belong to Jeff Davis and MTV Network. The only thing I own is Argent Reader insert, her immediate family, and her storyline, as well as her effects in the others’ storyline.

Chapter: 2/?

A/N:  SOFT DEREK, SOFT DEREK!!!!! If you enjoy my writing I’ll also be posting them in AO3 and Wattpad along with other stories (I also hope to start taking requests if ya’ll want) Hope you enjoy and all constructive criticism is encouraged.

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Chapter 2

5:00 am my phone read. 

It was usual for my brain to be awake at this hour. Since before I can remember it was part of the schedule I followed, everywhere I went. It was a small thing, but the sense of normalcy was a comforting friend. It made sense to follow a routine I could have anywhere. I was out of bed and into workout clothes, ready for a quick jog around the woods. 

I started off with a slow and comfortable trot before speeding up once I reached the tree-filled terrain. The smell of wet soil, the sound of birds chirping and leaves rustling, the crunching of leaves under my feet was oddly comforting. There was a strange pull that came from the heart of Beacon Hills. I had lived in many places in my short lifetime but this place was different, the atmosphere was different, the people were different. One of those people was Derek Hale, the mysterious, broody, sarcastic man that had bumped his way in. 

Speak of the devil and he shall appear.

"Why are you stopping?" He asked, a small chuckle escaping his mouth. 

"How did you get here? Where the hell did you come from?"

"You're not the only person who jogs in this town and this happens to be the trail I take. You know, you should work out on a trail that is closer to your house. Makes it easier to actually go back."

I looked around. Once again, I had trailed off and didn't know where I was. "Lucky for you, I have a great memory. We can finish off running and I'll instruct you back to your house."

"You know you sound like a stalker." We started to jog once again.

"How so?" 

"Well, you've only been there like two or three times and you already know the way back. Creepy!"

"Oh, come on, it means that I have a very sharp memory. Unlike you who can't seem to remember what house you live in."

"Touché."

The con and occasionally laughing at something. It felt good talking to him, almost natural. There was a supernatural attraction that I felt when I was near him, an unusual need for his closeness. Our relationship came easy, as the cliché would have it, it felt like I had known him all my life. 

We ran for about an hour and a half before we turned back. "I think it's time we went back. You have school in an hour."

"Whoa, take the stalking down a notch."

"Oh, come on, I went to that school before you, I think I know the schedule."

"Alright, grandpa. Let's head back. It's time for your breakfast smoothie and then some bingo."

"Very funny." He ruffled my hair whilst fake laughing.

"I try." We ran and ran until I came into view of the curb that led to the house. "Well, this is my exit. Would it be too much to ask for you to take me to school?"

"Not a problem. Meet you back here at 7:45?"

"That would be perfect." He kissed my cheek and left to run to where I believe was his house. My face turned red, and I ducked inside.

"Mom? Dad?" I entered the kitchen and noticed a note over a covered plate. "Left for work early. Eat your food and go to school." I read out loud.

I took my time getting ready for school. My bag was already packed, as was my lunch. A long shower and a slow breakfast were in store as I awaited Derek's black Camaro to roll into my driveway. 

"Thanks so much for the lift. I packed you some breakfast." 

"No problem and thank you." He smiled. "You know, maybe after school, I can finally give you a tour around town. So you can familiarize yourself."

"That would be wonderful." I checked my schedule. "Actually, you can pick me up an hour before school ends. I have study hall at that hour, and no one would care if I left."

"I think I can make that arrangement." He looked at me showing a perfect set of white teeth and a smile that would make anyone melt. "But wouldn't your parents know that you left school? I mean, you won't be there when they go pick you up."

"I'll just tell them Allison gave me a ride or walked home," I said thinking of more excuses I could tell my parents. Distracted by my thoughts, my hand started reaching out to the powered-off radio and I didn't notice that so did Derek's. A sharp current went up my arm as our hands make contact. We both quickly pulled away and I could feel the blood rushing to my face turning it a deep shade of red.

"Sorry, I shouldn't impose. It's your car." I spoke up, quick to start picking at the skin around my fingernails to busy my hands. Derek perceived the nervous nature of my actions and stopped my fussing by putting one of his hands over mine. 

"Don't worry it's fine. Just put the radio on whatever station you like." He smiled reassuringly and I reached to the radio and just turned it on, leaving it in the last station it had been on.

"Ugh, I absolutely dread going to school. Most of it I'm gonna forget either way."

"I'd tell you to ditch but that would be shame on me, so I won't. But think about it, this day you'll only get 7 hours of school and then you can hang out with me. Best present ever."

"Yeah, don't think so highly of yourself. Maybe I'll just wander around town until I find my way home."

"Very funny." He stopped at the drop-off zone. "This is your stop."

"Thanks again for the ride, awfully kind actions from such a sour wolf" I laughed at his scowl. "I'll see you in the afternoon."

"Looking forward to it." I exited the car and he waited till I was on the sidewalk to speed off.

"Was that Derek Hale that just dropped you off?" I turned around and was met face-to-face with Scott.

"Yeah. What's the problem?" Not that it will matter.

"You shouldn't trust him, he's bad news."

"Honestly, Scott, I understand your good intentions, but I'll sort out the wrong kind on my own terms." He looked taken aback at my response, probably thinking I would not talk back.

"I'm sorry if I offended you, but he is not a person that anyone should be with." With that, he left with worry evident on his face.

I understood that he was looking out for my "well-being”, but he didn't know me and I'm pretty sure he didn't know Derek either. Maybe that's what Derek meant when I met him. Everyone thinks he is a bad person, but he hasn't done anything wrong in my eyes.

I walked over to my locker and started exchanging my books. Closely next to me I could hear Scott talking to Allison about me and Derek, and my name should be out of his mouth. Once I finished with my locker, I slammed the door and they both stopped talking, noting my close presence. I walked past them feeling their worried stares burning my back. This was going to be a hell of a year. The only thing that could get me through it was the acquaintance relationship I have with Isaac. I did text him a bit last night but mostly helping him with homework. Lord knows he needs all the help he can get.  

We all stood around in gym class as Stiles and Erica climbed the rock wall. Everyone else had gone including Scott who mastered a great fall. Stiles appeared to have fun, but Erica would let out sounds of discomfort and shortness of breath as she climbed. At a point, she stopped. 

"Erica, are you dizzy?" Coach said. "Is it vertigo?" 

"Vertigo is the dysfunction of the vesicular system of the inner ear" Lydia stated in a mocking tone. "She's just freaking out." 

"Erica!" Coach screamed.

"coach, maybe it’s not safe. you know she's epileptic." Allison stated. How does no one care? 

"Wh-why does no one tell me this?!" Coach Finstock questioned annoyed. "Erica, just fall back, there's a mat that will catch you." 

She slowly let go of the wall and made her descent. No one seemed to care that the poor girl was shaken to the core; they all laughed.

When class was over everyone headed to their respective locker rooms to change. Something inside me kept pulling me back to the gym, so I walked back as I put on my shirt. As I opened the doors, I saw Erica fall from the wall and luckily into Scott's arms. He slowly put her on the floor as the class ran in behind us. 

"Put her on her side," I stated. 

"How did you know?" Allison whispered to Scott.

"I just felt it." He whispered back. 

After Erica had calmed, the coach called an ambulance to take her to be checked at the hospital and the day went by normally. I was currently in my "last" period. Tapping my nails in a rhythmic pattern waiting for the stupid bell to ring. Only 5 more minutes and I would be out of here. This was the first time I had done something like this. I always stick by the rules and make sure to follow all of them. My heart was racing, and my palms were sweating. In 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Cue the bell. I grabbed all my things and stuffed them in my bag. I used to my advantage the fact that everyone was piled in the hallway and headed outside. Waiting for me was Derek in his black Camaro. Suddenly my heart steadied its pace and I felt relaxed.

"Hey there, rebel." He smirked at me as I entered the car and buckled my seatbelt.

"Don't make small talk. Just go." I said whilst trying to hide by burrowing in the seat. If I could I would have jumped into the trunk to avoid any hidden stares from authority figures.

"Don't tell me you've never done this before." I shook my head no and felt my face growing warmer by the second. "Aw, you're so innocent. For a big mouth that is." I slapped his arm as hard as I could.

"Don't be rude." I crossed my arms, slouched down, and pouted. He looked over at me and laughed. That made me slouch farther down.

"Oh, come on. Don't get mad." He ruffled my hair and laughed once again when I swatted his hand away. "Yeesh, feisty."

"So, where's our first pit stop?" I asked whilst looking out the window not wanting to look at his face.

"A small diner I know. Wouldn't want you to starve." He smirked. "Might make you angrier."

"I am not angry, just annoyed."

"Got some feelings hurt?" He said laughing.

"Derek, don't be rude. You will regret it."

"Oh, what could you do?"

"Is that a challenge?" He didn't answer, just laughed. I rolled down the window and stuck my head out. "HELP!! This man is kidnapping me!! HELP!! Bloody he...!" 

My sentence was cut short by Derek's hand pulling me down by my jacket and onto the seat again.

"Why did you do that?" I asked innocently. I had caused the faces of a few people on the street to look at the car in horror.

"You know why! That was totally uncalled for."

"I told you that being rude was something you would regret. I'm not one to say this a lot but, I told you so." 

He tried his best to keep a tight scowl on his face but in a matter of seconds, we were laughing at my past actions.

"Whatever, we're here." He turned off the car and went to the passenger side to open the door for me. 

"Why thank you," I said and took his extended hand to pull my weight up. 

"No problem." I smiled at his goofy courtesy but as we walked inside the establishment I could feel my heart beating faster by the second. "Table for two." Derek pointed at a booth made for two people exactly. Once we had sat down a lady maybe in her late thirties approached us to take our order.

"What do you want to order today, darlings?" She gave us a warm smile as she waited for our response.

"I'll have the bacon cheeseburger with some onion rings, a stack of pancakes, and some chicken fillets, a Diet Coke, and afterward some pie, please."

"Would you like the kitchen sink with that?" I said in shock. "I think I'll just get the, ummmm, bacon cheeseburger also with some onion rings and an iced tea. Maybe add some pie afterward too."

The lady laughed a bit, nodded, and smiled at us as she turned to the kitchen to put out our order. 

"So, someone's a bit hungry. Huh, sour wolf?" I chuckled.

"Why do you call me that?" He said somewhat annoyed.

"I don't know. It just fits you."

"How?"

"Cause you're very sour and you kind of look like a wolf. Hairy face and crazy hair. I don't know how to explain it. It's just a nickname, though. If it makes you mad I can just call you something else."

"I'm not mad. Just wondering." He slouched on the seat looking less tense. "How is it that I'm usually so bad with meeting people yet with you, I just clicked?"

"I don't know. I'm just special that way."

"Very funny."

"I know! I could take up a career in comedy." He chuckled as he threw a sugar packet at me. "So, since we are getting to know each other we should know basic things about one another. Let me start. What's your favorite color?"

"Maybe black or blue. What about you?"

"Totally red and black." The waitress came with our drinks. I took a sip of my iced tea and continued with the questions. "Favorite place to be?"

"That house in the woods where we met." I gave him a weird look.

"Why there? It barely stands with a foundation. What could possibly be there?"

"It's the house I used to live in before it burnt down. My family was in there." I choked on my drink when he said this.

"Oh my gosh, Derek. I'm so sorry I brought it up. We can drop the topic."

"Don't worry about it. It happened such a long time ago it's sometimes relieving talking about it." After there was an awkward silence, so Derek cleared his throat and asked a question. "Um, and what's your favorite place to be?"

"I'm not sure. Usually, I like places more because of the people I'm with. But if I had to choose probably the woods, it's the calmest place I know. The only place where you can actually be free."

"Wow, Ms. Argent. So poetic. It touched me." He pointed at his heart. "Right here."

"Very funny, now, favorite sport?" And the game went on even when our food served. Whilst eating we kept asking each other questions and getting to know each other profoundly. This has been the first time I had ever opened up to someone. It felt strange. Letting someone know small details about yourself. Making yourself vulnerable to them. Showing them how they could break you. But this was different. I felt like I was just becoming closer to him.

"We should do that someday. I mean the thought of just leaving for a whole day, not knowing where you are going, just finding an adventure."

"Definitely. You decide when the first time." I smiled at him.

"That's a deal." He looked down at his watch. "I think it's time I take you home. Don't want your parents to worry."

"Alright. Let's go." I grabbed my bag and was about to pay my part of the check, but he wouldn't let me. He grabbed the money I left and paid completely. "I don't understand the need of being such a gentleman if this wasn't a date. Just two people hanging out."

"So, this wasn't a date?"

"You thought it was?" I thought about it. "What do you classify a date per se?"

"An outing in which two people go out and get to know each other a little bit more." What he said made sense. It had never dawned on me that this could have been anything other than just a casual outing, but not being too well versed in normal social encounters, let alone dating encounters. 

"Alright, you win. I have officially gone on my first date."

"No way. This could not have been your first date." When he saw the serious look on my face, he stopped chuckling. "I'm so sorry you had to have given you such a crappy first date. I promise I'll make up for it one day."

"Deal." We even shook on it. "Now let's get going before my parents know I'm late."

During the drive back, he pointed out different key places I should know when going around Beacon Hills as well as easier routes to these places. Although I was heavily grateful for all the useful tips, my brain could hardly remember the first route he showed me. 

When we got to my house, I noticed that my father's car was not in there. I guess they haven't arrived yet. I said goodbye to Derek and entered the house, thanking him for a lovely afternoon. I changed into workout attire and, deciding to stay home, went to the basement and started working out. After half an hour of running and half an hour of physical training, I decided it was enough and went to take a shower. I noticed that my parents weren't home yet.

"I wonder what's holding them back?" After my shower, I continued my current read of Pride and Prejudice. But something was bothering me, a thought that wouldn't leave my head.

I'm leaving once the year is over. Getting close to Derek will fuck me up once I leave. I've never had to say goodbye to anyone. I can't start now. I'll need to start avoiding him. Don't know how, but I must try.

I went downstairs to get a glass of water when I heard a knock on the door. It was Uncle Chris.

"Hey, Uncle Chris. What are you doing here?"

"I'm looking for your father. Is he here?"

"No, I haven't seen him. I got here and neither mom nor dad was here. Is something wrong?"

"No. Just couldn't reach his cell. I'm sure he's fine. Have a good night, sweetheart." He kissed my forehead and left. I started to worry. What if something had happened?

So, I decided to call him. Fortunately, he picked up.

"Dad, where are you?"

"Oh, honey, I forgot to tell you. Your mom and I will be out for the rest of the week. We left some money on the first drawer of the right side of the kitchen island and if you want you can stay with your uncle."

"But Uncle Chris came by and he didn't know where you were. Does he know you left?"

"Oh, I forgot to call him. I'll do that right now. Goodnight, munchkin, go to sleep."

"Goodnight, dad. Love you."

"Love you too." I hung up the phone and went upstairs completely forgetting about the glass of water I went to drink.

My phone buzzed and I looked at the caller ID signaling that Isaac was calling.

"Hey, Isaac."

"Hey, (Y/N). Um, do you think you can pick me up?" Isaac said in between short pants.

"Sure, where are you?" I asked. He told me where he was, and I took the keys to my mother's car to look for Isaac. He looked scared and frantic when I neared the spot, he told me about. His physique also looked different. Usually, he would walk cowering but now he stood tall and seemed a bit more buff. "You okay?"

"Yeah, just, um, do you think I could stay with you tonight?"

"I guess." I started driving to my house. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, totally. Just tired." I took the hint. He didn't want to talk, and I wasn't going to press on.

At my house, I arranged the guest room and got him spare clothes to change into. He thanked me and left for the bathroom. Something was wrong. But what?

***

Three days had passed.

Three days that I had stayed in my house for my daily workout.

Three days that my phone had been buzzing with messages from Derek asking where I was.

Because three nights before I had decided to avoid Derek at all costs.

The only way to leave it all behind is if you don't associate yourself with anyone. That way you won't feel any remorse or pain once you disappear. One time when I left was when I was approximately six or seven years old, and I had to say goodbye to Allison since we were sharing a room at that time. The second time was when I had to leave Josie. After that, I started familiarizing myself with the feeling of loneliness.  It wasn't that bad once you remembered the fact that you would always see your parents when you got home, and everything would be better. Although, these days I had housed Isaac in my house, rare was the occasion that we interacted other than doing homework. Isaac would come home late in the night and quickly went to sleep. But, he stayed in my spare room for two nights and told me he had found a place to stay. He left thanking me for my hospitality.

When I finished my workout, I ran upstairs and took a shower. I changed from my stinky workout clothes to a plain white shirt and black jeans, obviously paired with my leather jacket. Once dressed I went downstairs and grabbed some cash to buy myself a muffin and a big coffee. Finally, I found the keys to my beautiful matte black Harley Fat Bob. My father had gotten me this motorcycle about two years back when he noticed I just kept crashing cars. The only thing I never crashed was his motorcycle and because he was worried I would, he bought me my own. I tend to wreck a lot of stuff. It's not intentional, I'm just clumsy at times.

I opened the door to the garage and noticed it sitting in a corner covered by a blanket. Once I took it off, I smiled. I passed my hand over the beautiful color, the smooth surface, the cold metal. It all felt familiar. A part of me. I grabbed my helmet and got on it. Once I sat my body felt relaxed, at ease. A spark of adrenaline was shot through my body when the engine came to life.

I backed up from the garage and went to the local café store. While waiting to pick up my order I noticed Derek walking in with his jogging clothes on. He still hasn't noticed me, too busy looking at the menu. When my name was called, he looked at me and called my name, but I ran out of the café with my order ignoring him.

When I got to the school everyone was staring at me. The new chick was now badass. I walked in with my backpack slung over my shoulder easing towards my locker.

"Hey there, gorgeous." I closed the locker door to see Jackson standing next to me. I rolled my eyes.

"Hi, Jackson. What do you want?"

"I was just wondering when you were free."

"Oh, well from tomorrow to never gonna happen. Get down from the cloud, buddy."

"Oh, come on, we both know you want some of this." He motioned over his body.

"Get over yourself." I scoffed.

"Babe, it doesn't hurt to try."

"I believe she's not interested, Jackson." A strawberry blonde girl appeared. Her confidence struck me like lightning, a very apparent aura of dominance radiating from within her.

"Why don't you mind your own business, Lydia. I'm talking to her, not you. You've already ruined everything else."

"Well, I think she has no business with you so why don't you scram?" With a huff and a puff, Jackson finally gave in and I turned to greet my hero, who was surprisingly accompanied by Allison.

"Thank you, so much. He wouldn't take no for an answer."

"No problem. I'm Lydia, but you knew that."

"(Y/N). Argent." She motioned between Allison and me. "Cousins."

"Pleasure." Then the bell rang. "Guess I have a new best friend, (Y/N)." You guessed wrong.

I entered Mr. Harris' classroom and sat down next to Isaac and as usual Mr. Chatty Pants tried to hold a conversation from the table behind us. Seriously, how much can someone talk? I took out my notebook and started writing down everything the teacher was saying is the homework on the board. Stiles had finally gotten the hint and didn't talk to me the whole class. That was a relief. Maybe it was due to the fact he was too focused on the strawberry blonde who had saved my ass from Jackson.

The day went on quite smoothly except at lunch. It wasn't the same Erica that had fallen from the rock-climbing wall. She completely changed; a more confident walk, she was wearing makeup and tight-fitted clothing, and her hair was perfectly styled. She left the lunchroom after taking a bite off an apple seductively and Scott and Stiles followed, as did I. Curiosity had taken the best of me as to this overnight transformation.

She opened the front doors to the school and there he was. Derek Hale in his black Camaro with the biggest smirk on his face staring at Scott. When he directed his sight to me his smirk kind of fell but was brought up quickly. During that Erica had gotten inside the car and they left, together. I don't know why I was jealous because he meant nothing to me, but it broke my heart. I got nervous. I think Scott noticed because he looked at me worried.

"Are you okay, (Y/N)?" I nodded rapidly and out of breath. I had no idea what was happening.

"I think you're having a panic attack." Stiles pointed out handing me an inhaler.

"I used to have panic attacks, too." I inhaled a pump and my breathing seemed to normalize. "You okay now?"

"Yeah. Thanks." I handed him the inhaler.

"No, keep it. I don't need it anymore." I said a low thanks and walked back to school to head to my next class.

I felt extremely weird the rest of the day. Why did I feel that way when I saw Erica and Derek together? It wasn't like anything was going on between us. Also, he's far too old for me. Or maybe I'm too young. I don't know. But I couldn't shake off that sour taste of jealousy that the image of them left.

I knew I wanted to stay as far away as I could from hin but at this moment there was nothing more that I wanted than to be close to him.

Tag: @lokisgoddesofpower

<- Previous

A/N: Please check out my last post about the fandoms I’ll be writing for. 

[petri808]

OHMYGODDD JUST SAW YOUR LATEST POST I LOVE IT ANGST WITH A HAPPY ENDING IS JUST CHEF'S KISS. I WOULD LOVE TO SEE 42, 49 and 13 FOR NALU PLEASEEE CAN'T WAIT TO READ ITT

😳 Ya’ll really love angst huh? Lol okay, sure let’s see what I can come up with. 😊 “You can’t keep pretending it didn’t happen, cause guess what? It did!” + “I’m pregnant” + “Im too sober for this”

Lucy’s knees weakened and sent her crumbling to the bathroom floor. Why was this happening to her?! She’d just finished college and was about to start her paid internship with a local newspaper. ‘What am I gonna do?’ Lucy gripped to the stick in her hand as the tears trickled down her face. This could derail her future before it even started— all because of one slip-up. How was she going to tell Natsu… Not knowing who else to talk to, Lucy turned to her best friend Levy McGarden. She texted the woman and drove over to her friends apartment in dread.

“Oh, Lu…” Levy hugged her friend tightly before pulling her into the small apartment. She sat Lucy down on the couch, then made them both some tea. “How you feeling?” Levy asked as she handed the cup over.

“How do you think I’m feeling?!” Lucy groaned. “I feel like I’m in a nightmare.”

“Are you sure the results are correct? You know those home pregnancy tests can be wrong.”

“I don’t know, I mean I followed the instructions and it didn’t give an error sign.” Lucy pulled the stick from her pocket. “See?” She showed it to her friend. “Two lines.”

“Oh— yeah, looks like it,” Levy agreed.

Lucy pocketed the test once again and hung her head. Both hands cradled the warm cup, just holding it without a desire to drink from it. “Just thinking about this is making me sick. Maybe I can just pretend it’s not true.”

“Lu, that’s ridiculous. I’m pretty sure the growing bump on your stomach will make that difficult.”

“Ugh! I know!” Lucy shrieked. “Lie to me or something… Levy, I-I don’t think I can deal with this!”

“Well, you have to. And how am I supposed to lie about this?!”

“I don’t know, tell me this is a dream. Just a bad dream that I’m gonna wake up from. The test was wrong, something! Maybe it’s just a fiction story I’m working on cause I just don’t wanna think about it right now.”

“I’m sorry, but you can’t keep pretending it didn’t happen, cause guess what? It did! Lucy you have to face reality.”

“What am I gonna do Levy? I can’t be having a baby!”

“Well first things first, you need to tell Natsu— I’m assuming it’s Natsu.”

“Of course, it’s Natsu! I haven’t slept with anyone else.”

“Well you need to tell him. He deserves to know.”

“I know…”

“Natsu’s a stand up guy, I know he’s going to do the right thing.”

Lucy sighed, “that’s not what I worry about. I mean having kids is something that’s crossed my mind… just not anytime soon. We’re not even married yet. Ugh! I’m such an idiot.”

“Sometimes these things happen.” Levy placed her hand on her friend’s shoulder. “Can’t go back to the past, so now all you can do is figure out the now. Do you have any idea when it happened?”

“My guess is my graduation party, cause that was the last time we had sex. I barely even remember it cause I was so drunk,” Lucy whimpered, then started to sob. “We’re usually careful but… yeah, it had to be that.”

“Come here,” Levy pulled her friend into a hug. “You’re gonna be okay. Whatever happens, you’re gonna be okay.”

The women spent a couple more hours chatting, flipping between random topics, but often coming back to this one. Lucy struggled to even wrap her mind around the reality that this is real. That she was going to have a child, when she was barely an adult herself and all the factors involved only compounded her dilemma. Her new job isn’t going to afford a child. Natsu had a decent job, but even combined it would be a struggle. They’d have to find a place together, a two bedroom house or apartment. What about the medical expenses, and the baby supplies— babies are expensive! Where was the money going to come from?

When Lucy noticed the time and realized Natsu would be coming home from work within the hour, she thanked her friend for the support and bid her goodbye. Even though she had calmed down a little, she wasn’t ready, didn’t know what or how she was going to break the news to him. So, after arriving home, Lucy tried to distract herself by cooking dinner. It didn’t really work, but at least a meal was made. Her life until now had been going well in that she had a boyfriend who treated her right, supported her while she finished her degree, even pushed her to follow her dreams of writing. And now that her degree was finished, Lucy was on her way after landing the paid internship. If she passed the internship, they would offer her a permanent position at the newspaper.

But now all of that felt like it was slipping through her fingers. All her hard work for nothing because juggling a small child and going to work… Maternity leave is not paid, so they’ll have to rely on just one income for a time, then daycare is quite expensive. Sure, there are programs that she could apply for to help or family, but that’s not the point— the point is, they are sorely not ready to become parents.

“I’m home!” Natsu called out as he entered the apartment. “Something smells good!”

“Welcome home, Natsu.” Lucy called out from the kitchen. “It’s almost done.”

Natsu detected a change in his girlfriend’s tone. Usually when he gets home, she’s in a happier mood— but not today. He threw his keys onto the kitchen island and walked up, giving her a kiss on the cheek. “Everything okay?”

Whatever words she’d planned to say were thrown out the window as tears pooled instantly in Lucy’s eyes. “Natsu, it’s…”the words stumbled out, “um… I-I’m pregnant.”

“P-Preg…nant?!” Natsu took a step back in shock, his trembling hand moving to cover his mouth. “Oh, wow— I’m too sober for this,” he mumbled.

“Pregnant,” she repeated as the sobs broke free. “And alcohol is what got us into this mess!” Lucy snapped and sobbed louder.

“Oh, h-hey now, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that,” Natsu pulled her into his arms. “Don’t cry baby, please don’t cry, I hate seeing you cry.”

“Natsu, I’m pregnant, did you hear me?! Pregnant! I can’t be pregnant!”

“Shh… I hear you,” he gently coaxed Lucy to the couch and had her sit down, then sat beside her, cradling her close. “True, it’s not the best time… but we can make it work.”

“You don’t understand, I’m not ready, Natsu. I don’t think I could handle it…” all the reasons refreshing in her mind. “I have no experience with with kids. What if we screw up? It’s just…” Lucy sighed. “I think… I’m too overwhelmed right now.”

“Okay, well— they make those things now, the, um, end pregnancy stuff.”

“I don’t know…”

“Lucy, I’ll support whatever decision you make.”

“You say that now, but later you’ll probably resent me for… kil— doing that,” she mumbled.

“I don’t know that so neither can you. All I do know is that yes it might hurt— but you’re the important thing right now, and if you say you’re not ready, then I have to accept it. Kids are never easy, I doubt all the preparation in the world can really make a difference. But Lucy,” he took her hand and held it to his chest. “As long as I’ve known you, whatever you choose to do you’re great at it.”

“Really?” She looked up with hope filling her eyes for the first time all day.

Natsu smiled. “And who better to start a family with?” He cupped her cheeks and kissed her. “Then a smart, sassy, beautiful woman like you.”

Lucy’s eyes flooded with tears. “You really think we can make it work?”

He nodded. “As long as it’s something we really want, then yeah.”

After a momentary pause, Lucy let out a long stabilizing exhale. “Okay. I’ll call my doctor and make an appointment tomorrow to check.”

“Really? Y-You sure? Because I don’t want you to feel like I’m trying to coax you into this.”

“No, I-I’m pretty— sure. Things sometimes happen for a reason, right? Maybe it’s meant to be.”

Natsu pulled her in for another longer kiss. “Guess I better hurry up and marry you then,” he chuckled.

She snorted a laugh. “I guess so mister!”

He pulled her close again, hugging her to his chest. “I love you so much baby.”

“Mmm, I love you too.”

“My own baby momma,” he teased.

Lucy slapped his chest with a giggling shriek. “Don’t you dare call me that!”

“Oh,” he grinned, “I’m totally getting t-shirts made.”

[atinybitofau]

[ateez] S E O N G H W A ⤮ baby daddy au

HIS SON IS A PRODIGY AND HE NEEDS A (mommy) NANNY. MAFIA SEONGHWA.

a/n: in honor of the beautiful vlive from last night 😭😭. how ya’ll doing Seonghwa stans?

• Seonghwa’s proud of his son.

• even if he works dirty jobs—

• isn’t exactly proud of himself.

• he’s got pride, believe me.

• but it’s not ordinary pride.

• Seonghwa’s far from the ordinary.

• “The nanny quit.” Hongjoong teeter’s Seonghwa’s baby-double on his hip. “Hwa, you need to find someone who can handle Yeolhwa. Your son is as bad as you. If not, worse.”

• he chuckles lowly putting down his stack of papers before reaching over for his son.

• his son always curling at the scent and warmth of his father.

• he playfully glares picking at his cheeks before telling him, “Yeolhwa, you can’t just pull nanny’s hair when you can’t get something you want. That’s not good.”

• Yeolhwa’s too young to understand.

• because his son is spoiled by everyone he encounters.

• and Seonghwa expects nothing but when he works his ass off to get the things he wants.

• he doesn’t want his son to struggle the way he did when he was young.

• “What’s the mother doing?” Hongjoong is merciless when he asks. “That dumb skank only knows one thing and it’s popping kids and popping pills.”

• he admits he’s had too much leisure when having his fun in the past—

• but he never regrets having his son in a mistake he can barely even remember.

• “I’ve made it clear he needs no mother.”

• “Seonghwa, no matter what you do, that boy needs a mother.” the younger rolls his eyes. “A nanny can only make up so much for what you deprive. And your job doesn’t make things easier. You can’t take care of him like this forever. Not by yourself.”

• Seonghwa teeters his own son to sleep in his arms.

• staring and cradling his face like he’s the greatest gift not even money can buy—

• not even his power.

• he didn’t have to kill someone to get Yeolhwa.

• his son is everything to him.

• but he has to make sacrifices to give his son everything.

• nothing is ever just given.

• “I’m sorry it’s such short notice, Ms. y/n. But I hope the accommodations we have are enough to settle with.” Hongjoong opens the door for you. “Yeolhwa can be a little arduous when it comes to caretaking. Do be careful.”

• you are anxious you must admit.

• the home smells eerily like iron and musk.

• you can tell the job you took wasn’t just leisure or easy money.

• “Oh.” you shyly smile. “I’m sure he’s just a little hard to understand. Children can be unpredictable and we can’t blame them for that.”

• Hongjoong hears that too many times.

• knows that’s what they all say.

• chokes on his breath before he says something that might scare you away.

• “Well I must get back.” he hands you a cellphone and a book of references before pulling his suit. “Please don’t hesitate to call me. Everything you need is in that book. I’ll be back to relieve you at 9 pm tonight.”

• “Thank you, Mr. Hongjoong. I hope I don’t let you down.”

• he scoffs at that. “Good luck, Ms. y/n. You’re gonna need it.”

• you don’t know what that means.

• but you’re more concerned on taking care of a child who is claimed to be intolerable.

• and you stern by the idea of inexperienced children.

• because they’re not like us.

• they learn from what they’re surrounded with.

• “M-mr. Hongjoong. I’m sorry for bothering you but I was wondering if I can take Yeolhwa to the park today. I see there’s no schedule for outside play time and I—“

• “Unfortunately his father doesn’t approve of outside exposure.” Hongjoong’s fast to quib. “He’s going to have to settle playing inside.”

• “But Mr—“

• “I apologize y/n but that just can’t happen.”

• you observe Yeolhwa.

• he’s a quiet and kept child.

• but he doesn’t like the word no.

• no, he likes getting what he wants.

• and he plays with his toys like they’re not toys at all.

• holds his toy gun like it’s almost real.

• “Yeolhwa, what’s that baby?”

• he looks up to you with golden eyes. “Nanny y/n.”

• you smile at the small boy who offers you a book. “You want me to read to you?”

• he cracks a smile and curls in your lap.

• he’s a sweet kid and is quite capable.

• but you see why he’s not easy to deal with.

• not when he throws tantrums like he’s a grown ass adult—

• “Yeolhwa baby, put the book down.” you ease him in the best way possible. “Sweetie, you can’t play anymore. You have to take a nap.”

• he sobs again.

• hurling a heavy hard cover book in your direction.

• sighing, you only collect the things he throws never giving it attention.

• it only peeves him more.

• “You can cry all you want. But crying won’t get you your toys, baby. You have to sleep.”

• eventually fulfilling your hopes,

• he gets tired.

• curling in your lap when he seeks comfort and warmth for slumber.

• once he’s asleep, you pack your things ready to leave for the night.

• “I hope he wasn’t too much trouble.”

• Hongjoong’s surprised the safe house wasn’t a complete wreck.

• he’s surprised nothings broken.

• but notices the bruising marks that formed on your legs.

• “I’m assuming you won’t be back?” he asks while teetering the small sleeping boy on his hip.

• “I’ll be back.” you affirm. “And I don’t intend to leave any time soon.”

• he’s convinced you’re different.

• that you have a certain will and composure that resembles someone he knows.

• tells Seonghwa immediately.

• “She’s worth watching. You should definitely see.”

• it happens again for the next couple days.

• but Yeolhwa’s toys hurt more than the books.

• and now you’re bleeding hard in the bathroom while he sleeps in his bed.

• “Children are unpredictable, y/n.” you mumble to yourself. “They grow learning from you.”

• Seonghwa watches through his monitor how you treat his child.

• sometimes peeved that you don’t give his son what he wants—

• but mesmerized when his son crawls into your lap every time despite it.

• “Hongjoong, I’ll be picking up Yeolhwa tonight. And prepare Yunho for babysitting duty.”

• Yeolhwa cries when he’s pulled out of your arms by a dark suited man,

• wants to stay in yours.

• crying for your name while you smile softly at him, hand to his cheek.

• “I’ll be back tomorrow, baby.” you coo. “Be a good boy okay? And I promise if you don’t cause trouble, I’ll come back every time.”

• he understands well for a child.

• curling obediently into the dark suited man who resembled him after you spoke.

• “I’m assuming you’re the infamous father?”

• Seonghwa studies you. “You take care of a child well. Thank you.”

• you shake it off pulling at your scarf. “I take care of a child as if it’s my own. Thank you for letting me.”

• your voice is soft,

• motherly and gentle.

• Seonghwa hasn’t felt this kind of delicate emotion in years.

• “I have dinner waiting. Care to join me?”

• you smile while holding at Yeolhwa’s reaching hand. “I have my own family I must attend to, Mr. Park.”

• “It’ll only be a couple minutes.”

• you notice the tattoos on his neck.

• the similar stamp of injustice that lingered on each of the men you’ve met prior.

• realizing days ago that Seonghwa’s son was a prodigy.

• one so that isn’t exactly safe or ordinary.

• “Your family relies on you.” Seonghwa keeps his eyes on you in midst of eating. “You’re a very lovely woman, y/n. Strong willed and captivating.”

• you blink softly unsure of how to respond. “I do what I must..”

• “Don’t we all.”

• your eyes meet his and you swallow your emotions harshly biting back at your lip.

• you don’t deny he’s a charming man.

• like his son, quiet and kept.

• “But you’re a beautiful woman too.” he admits. “Caring and gentle. My son’s fond of you for those reasons. He has good taste.”

• “Like his father I presume?” you tease making him laugh. “I have one request I want to light up though, Mr. Park. I want to bring your son out. Expose him to more than just the guns and walls.”

• he notes your observance.

• strong willed indeed.

• “I trust you.”

• you should be the one trusting him.

• but it’s inevitable what happens with his son as soon as he’s vulnerable, exposed.

• he’s a prodigy wanted by the best and worst of the world.

• and now your shielding a child with your own life.

• as if he was yours.

• “Hey baby, don’t cry. You’re gonna be okay. Yeolhwa, you’re gonna be okay sweetie.”

• he’s only crying because you’re crying.

• cause you don’t know what to do in this situation.

• but when Seonghwa appears from nowhere, spins you and his son around into his chest,

• you suddenly feel safe.

• him guarding you,

• you shielding his son.

• “Y/n, look at me.” he’s careful to touch you. “I’m gonna need you to come with me, okay?”

• you can only blink when his son is yanked out of your hands,

• the poor boy wanting only you.

• but with Seonghwa’s men, he’s safer.

• Seonghwa staying behind to protect you.

• “Y-Yeolhwa!”

• “He’s gonna be okay.” Seonghwa caresses your face shooting blank bullets over the car you two hide against. “I need to get you out of here okay? You need to be strong for me.”

• crying’s not gonna get you anywhere and if anyone were to know that, it would be you.

• so you follow.

• now safe from harm, Yeolhwa sleeping soundly on your lap,

• while his men try to console you with a cup of hot herbal tea and sweet talk.

• “This must be a lot for you. We’re sorry y/n.”

• you smile softly bouncing Seonghwa’s son up and down on your lap. “I don’t mind. I read the book Hongjoong gave and it was all in the fine print. A disclaimer that promised to keep me safe.”

• it’s no lie even Seonghwa’s men find you attractive.

• and it might be because you’re so humble.

• so delicate.

• Seonghwa has a proposition for you when Yeolhwa’s asleep.

• today being the day you should be quitting.

• but you promised Hongjoong your full effort and nothing but.

• “Y/n, stay with me.”

• Seonghwa leans his forehead against yours, hand cradling the line of your jaw.

• you feel warm against his touch.

• like a baby to a mother.

• in this case, a woman to a man.

• “Stay with me and Yeol.” he runs a finger over your parted lips. “He needs you. He needs a mother.”

• he admits his son has grown to love you.

• and maybe he’s grown to love you too.

• “I can’t take care of him the way you do.” he watches as your eyes lull to his voice. “He won’t be able to live without you.”

• “I’ll stay for as long as he needs me too.”

• it’s the first time Seonghwa’s ever stayed home.

• ever slept in his own bed with his own son curling into his chest.

• but it’s not the first time he’s slept in a bed with a woman.

• but it’s the first in his own bed with a woman he loves.

• “Mommy, hurry..”

• your eyebrows furrow and you whip around to face Seonghwa and his son,

• “M-mommy?”

• Seonghwa chuckles brushing through his sleepy son’s hair. “You heard him, mommy. Come to bed.”

• you take care of his son like he’s your own.

• but now Yeolhwa doesn’t need a nanny anymore.

• most of the time, looking for his father.

• “He doesn’t need me anymore, Seonghwa.” you playfully nudge at him when his chocolate haired son plays with new toys. “I don’t think I need to stay.”

• “Absurd.” the mafia boss spins you on your feet so your lips meet his. “If he doesn’t need a nanny, he needs a mother. But if he didnt need you at all then stay because I do.”

• you giggle against your boyfriend’s lips.

• “Hongjoong keeps having me sign a contract.” you pull at his collar, studying his eyes some more. “But the one this morning seemed to have unordinary discrepancies.”

• “That’s because that was a marriage contract.”

• “Ah.” you tease, him biting at your lip. “That must be why I saw your name instead of Yeol’s.”

• “APPA!”

• you two are suddenly pulled apart, the small boy holding out his arms protecting your legs.

• “You’re hurting mommy with your teeth! Bad appa.”

• you choke a laugh when Seonghwa furrows at the cockblock son of his.

• “Yeolhwa, you can’t just hurt me to get the things you want.” Seonghwa teases hoisting up his smiley son on his hip. “Who taught you that?”

• “You appa. You said we have to protect mommy from bad people. And that mommy should never get hurt.”

• “Oh yeah. I did, didn’t I?”

@atinybitofau

[triplexdoublex]

Alpha Omega

Pairings: Colson x Reader

Warnings/Tags: alcohol, drunk, attempted rape (colson saves you before ANYTHING happens), potentially triggering dialogue about it the next morning, strangers to friends to lovers, smut, squirting 💦

A/N: Inspired by a weird dream I had and a real tweet I read, the person Jake in the fic was actually Jake Paul in my dream (ew). If you think the beginning backstory may trigger you and just want to read their friendship turn to lovers/smut, then scroll to the 2ND time skip marked with stars (***)

College mid-terms were finally over, which meant the same thing every year: the Alpha Omega annual fraternity party! It was the biggest party on campus every year, and even though it’s not really your scene, you decided to attend this year. Maybe it was the stress of mid-terms weighing extra heavy on your mind, but you needed an escape. But now, five full drinks and some shots later, you find yourself stumbling around the drink and keg area in the kitchen with a half-empty red solo cup, wondering how the hell you're supposed to find your way back to your dorm to sleep off what was obviously a very poor decision.

“Hey pretty thing,” you hear, suddenly feeling an arm slink around your waist.

“Do I know you?” you ask, disoriented and confused as your eyes try to focus on the face of the person touching you.

“The name’s Jake,” he shouts over the music, guiding you out of the kitchen and into the main party room. “You should come back to my room, you look like you need to lay down,” he says with ill-intent, but you’re too intoxicated to argue, letting him lead you up the stairs.

Even though most of your senses are impaired right now, you can’t mistake the distinct, pungent smell of weed wafting towards you as Jake escorts you down the hall once the two of you reach the top of the stairs.

“Yo, Jake!” a voice shouts from an open door, smoke billowing out as you pass.

“Hey Cols, what’s up?”

“Nothing much, man,” he says, blowing a smoke ring as he passes the blunt to his roommate Pete. “Wanna hit?”

“Maybe later, gotta get this pretty little thing back to room,” Jake answers.

“Aye, she alright? Colson questions, quickly rising to his feet.

“Yeah, pal she don’t look too good,” Pete coughs.

“Nah, man, that’s fucked up. She’s gooone!” Colson says getting a closer look at you. ‘You can’t talk her back to your room like this. That’s just wrong.”

“The fuck I can!” Jake retorts. “Look,” he says turning to you and lifting your slumped head. “You wanna go to my room with me don’t you, sexy?”

“N-nno” You slur, drunkenly shaking your head ‘Yes’

“See, she shook her ‘yes’,” Jake argues.

“Yeah, and her mouth said fuckin’ NO, Dawg!” Colson snaps back.

“Listen, I’m taking her to my room and there ain’t shit you can do about it!”

“The fuck there is!” Colson swings, his closed fist making contact with the side of Jake’s face, knocking him out cold.

***************************

The next thing you know you’re opening your eyes; an unfamiliar room and bed coming into view. You slowly sit up holding your throbbing head

“Hey, you’re awake,” says a soft voice to your right. Quickly, you turn your head in a panic to see a tall blonde sitting on the edge of the bed.

“W-who are you? Where.. Where am I?” you ask on the verge of tears.

“My name's Colson,” he reaches out for your hand. “I —”

“Don’t touch me!” You yell, scooting backwards pulling  the covers up over you when you realize all you’re wearing is a thin, white, mens t-shirt. “Where are my clothes?”

“Aye, yo, it’s not like that. Relax, listen,” he stands with his hands up backing away from you. “I slept on the couch, I just wanted —”

“Where are my clothes!?” you demand.

“You threw up on them,” he answers.

“So lemme get this right ��� I threw up and you took off my clo —”

“NO! No! God no!” he says waving his arms. “My roommate Pete —”

“So your roommate Pete took off my clothes…?”

“NOOO! Please, just listen. I swear I was just trying to help you and keep you safe.” The desperation in his voice causes you to let down your guard a little. “I was saying, my roommate Pete. His girl. She stayed over last night and I asked her to help get you cleaned up and changed. I saw nothing I swear,” he puts his hands up again.

You sit there in silence, confused, trying to process everything he just said.

“You really don’t remember anything from last night? Do you?” He asks, stepping slowly back towards the bed.”

“No,” you shake your head, disappointed in yourself.

He cautiously begins to sit back down on the edge of the bed then pauses “Can I?” 

You nod ‘yes’ and he takes a seat.

“Yo, you were in really rough shape last night. I’m assuming you had too much to drink?”

“Yeah,” you admit looking ashamed.

“Aye, we’ve all been there. I’m just glad you’re ok,” he smiles. “Me and my homie Pete were just up here smoking when we seen some dude we know trying to take you back to his room. I could tell you were wrecked. Fuck, you where barely conscious. I tried to tell him how wrong that was but he wouldn’t listen so I knocked him the fuck out. I didn’t know where your dorm was or if you came to the party with anyone and I wanted to make sure you had a safe place to sleep it off.”

“ Thank you. I’m sorry I jumped to conclusions,” you apologize.

“Nah I completely understand,” he accepts your apology. ‘That’s why I wanted to be here when you woke up, I figured you might be a little confused.”

“More than a little,” you let out a small laugh.

Colson cracks a smile, then heads to his dresser, pulling out a pair of his athletic shorts. “Here, tell you what,” he says, tossing the shorts on the bed. “ Imma head out there —” he points to the door. Let you get dressed and I’ll drive you back to your dorm. Cool?”

“Cool,” you answer with a thumbs up and a smile as he steps out the room, closing the door behind him.

*******************

“Seriously, thank you so much,” you say when he pulls up to your dorm.”What can I do for you? I feel like I can’t thank you enough.”

“Nothing. Any respectable man would have done the same thing,” he says.”I can only hope that one day if god forbid my daughter even finds herself in that position that someone would do the same for her.”

“Awww, you have a daughter?”

“Yeah,” he smiles like a proud father, lifting his backside from the drivers seat to pull out his wallet. “Her name’s Casie,” he says opening to her picture.  

“She’s beautiful.”

“Thank you,” he says, then tucking his wallet back into his pocket. “She lives with her mom but I still see her all the time.”

“I’m glad. You seem like you’d be a great father.” you smile. “Thanks again,” you add, stepping out of the car.

“Hey, ummm, wait,” he calls out the car window as you walk towards your dorm.

“Yeah?” you turn back to face him.

“Ain’t you in that bitch Mrs. Pearson’s creative writing class with me?”

“Oh yeah,” you thought he looked familiar. “You usually sit up in the back row right?”

“If you mean ‘take a nap in the back row’, then yeah that’s me”, he laughs.

“Well see you bright and early tomorrow then I guess,” you smile.

“Yeah, see ya,” he smiles back before driving off.

**************************************

The two of you became quite close after that. Gradually moving your seats closer and closer to be near each other in class and pairing up for projects together. You even got to meet his daughter Casie briefly once before her mom picked her up from their weekend visit. You spent a lot of your free time together.It was amazing how you could do absolutely nothing when you were together yet there was no awkward silence or moments: much like right now where you're both hanging out in your dorm just laying on your bed scrolling aimlessly through your phones.

“Oh my god why are men so stupid?” You blurt out in laughter, showing him a tweet on your phone. “This dude really had the audacity to make a whole ass thread about how to eat pussy but he obviously has no clue what he’s talking about; girls don’t squirt out of their clits!’ No wonder girls never cum and have to fake it. Ya’ll mother fuckers don’t even know where the clit IS, and I’m pretty sure squirting is just something made up by the porn industry cuz that shit never happens in real life.”

“Aye, nah I hope you aint including me in that, cuz lemme tell you, ya boy knows where the clit is!  My girls always cum,” he smirks. 

“Yeah, okay,” you roll your eyes. “How do you know they’re not faking?”

“Cuz squirting ain’t made up, that shits VERY real! Maybe not every time but it has happened so I know they weren’t faking,” he smiles. “You mean to tell me a guy has never made you cum?

“Uhn uh” you shake your head no.

“And you’ve never squirt... even ..uhh..by yourself...or with whatever toys you chicks use?”

“I mean I’ve cum alone, but never squirt. No,” you admit blushing. You and Colson have never discussed anything sexual with each other before.

“That’s bananas, dawg!” he exclaims, slapping the bed.

The room grows quiet, the silence feeling awkward for the first time in your whole friendship.

“Aye, uh you trust me right?” Colson breaks the silence

“Yeah, of course, with my life!” you exclaim.”Why?”

“Trust me enough to uhmm...show you what I can do?”

“Are--are you saying you wanna — “

“I wanna make you cum,” he blurts out, cutting you off. “If- if you’ll let me that is.”

“I...Uhmm..I..”, you stumble while thinking it over.

“Sorry… uhhh let’s just forget this whole conversation, okay?” he says ashamed, thinking he made you uncomfortable.

“Why not,” you blurt out nonchalantly.

“Wait!, why not, like… like you … you wanna —”

You silently shake your head yes biting your lip.

“Oh shit! For real?” He says in surprise, getting up off the bed. “Uhh, c’mere,” he calls you over to the edge of the bed.

You do as you're told crawling over to the edge, sitting with your legs dangling off the bed. “You know, you don’t gotta go easy with me,” you smirk waiting for him to make his next move.

“Good, I wasn’t planning on it,” he says, immediately flipping you over and yanking your panties off from under your dress.

“Ugh you boys are all the same,” you groan looking back at him assuming he’s just gonna start fucking you from behind. “Haven’t any of you even heard of foreplay?”

“Don’t tell me no one’s ever eaten your pussy from the back before?” he questions, kneeling down behind you. 

With both hands he grabs your ass making it jiggle for him before delving his tongue between your folds, his tongue exploring every crevice. You gasp at the sensation and feel his muffled laugh buzz against your core, intensifying your pleasure. Gripping your ass tighter, he alternates between plunging a firm, pointed tongue in and out of your wet slit and assaulting your clit with a series of rapid fire kitten licks. Your legs weaken with each lash of his tongue, your body slowly collapsing against the bed.

“Keep that ass up, girl,” he pauses briefly to say. You try with all your might but it’s no use; Colson has reduced your legs to a pile of jello. Roughly he tosses you onto your back, spreads your thighs open and gets back to work. Keeping his tongue focused on your clit, he slides two fingers deep inside of you, his lengthy digits perfectly pressing against your G spot. “I can feel this pussy tightening around my fingers, I know you're close, right?” He pauses to ask cockily.

All you can manage is to nod, ‘yes’, your bottom lip clenched tightly between your teeth as you look down locking eyes with colson; the fiery passion in them is a stark contrast to their ice blue hue.

Colson quickens the pace of his fingers, the sloshing of your wetness audible as he brings you closer to the edge. Then resting his free hand on your mound he gently pulls back the hood of your clit with his thumb exposing the most sensitive part sending your body into convulsions when he rapidly flicks his tongue against it.

“Colson, FUCK!!! ” you scream out in pleasure as the most intense orgasm of your life rips through you. “Oh my god... oh my god,” you chant in pleasure and shock as you realize you’re actually squirting. Colson doesn’t miss a beat continuing to work you through your high, relishing in the mess you're making all over his face and fingers. When you finally stop twitching he removes his fingers and sits up with a smug look. He pulls off his shirt, wipes his glistening face with it, then tosses it on the floor and hurriedly starts undoing his belt.

“You didn’t think I was just gonna stop at one, did you?” He says cockily pulling himself from his boxers. “Awhh, fuck yeah, sooo wet and tight,” he groans as he pushes in, then bringing his hand between your two bodies, and begins to rub your clit as he thrusts.

“Mhmmmhhmm,” you moan, the bundle of nerves still sensitive from your prior orgasm.

“Told ya I could make you feel good,” he teases, his breath ghosting over that one reactive spot on your neck just behind your ear, causing you to let out a little squeak. “You like that?” He laughs, nipping at the same spot while his hips roll in like the tide, crashing repeatedly against the shore of your pelvis. He nips and kisses along your jawline making his way to your mouth, harshly tugging your bottom lip with a groan. Your tongue reaches out, searching for him as he pulls back.

“Fucking tease,” you whimper.

“That desperate to taste yourself on me?” He chaffs.

To be honest you’re desperate for everything he’s giving you right now; you’re body has never felt such pleasure. So when he offers his mouth back to you, you happily welcome the tart taste of yourself still present on his ravenous tongue. Your mouths move in a hungry rhythm, following suit with your hips. Your breaths and moans echo each others, increasing in speed and volume as climax nears. He can tell you’re so so close and he knows just how to get you there. He  grabs your legs pulling you flush against him and throws your legs over his shoulder, keeping your thighs pinned to his chest with both arms as continues to pound you.

“Mhmmm… Yeah, Yeah, Fuck me! Fuck me!”  you whine needily clawing at the sheets as you enjoy his cock from a whole new angle, slamming into your g-spot at the perfect tempo. It’s just a few more thrusts until he has you completely undone, cumming for the second time today.

“Jesus Christ, Colson” you moan breathily as you ride it out.

‘Ughggg,” he grunts loudly, quickly pulling  out, your legs falling to hips as he finishes on your stomach. 

“Can’t believe you were out here talkin’ ‘bout men don’t know where the clit is and no man ever made you cum,” he says mockingly after he catches his breath. “Nah, girl, you just been fucking with some losers. Gotta get you a real man like me.” 

“Well looks like I got myself one now,” you smirk. “ because we will definitely be doing that again!”

“Awhhh shiiiit,” he says loudly, his hand covering his smile. “ Got you addicted to this dick already, huh?” He teases.

“Shut up,Colson-,” you laugh, chucking a pillow at him “- and go get me something to clean off my stomach.”

[arigatouiris]

animal instincts // inosuke x reader

Author’s Note: Another draft pick hahahahah. I headcanon that Inosuke is like this when he’s in love~ My poor misunderstood rough boi who deserves nothing but the world! I hope ya’ll like this, I put some effort into this one hahahaha. Thanks for reading!!

Word count: 4069

Pairing: Hashibira Inosuke x Reader

Warnings: fluff, slight spice (things get a bit heated here UwU) idk, slight angst, SPOILERS FOR THE KIMETSU MANGA

Zenitsu had a question plaguing his mind ever since (y/n) (l/n) came into his life. Not that he didn’t try wooing her and asking her to marry him, no, she turned him down rather decently and kindly, which forced him to think of her as a good friend. She was a demon slayer herself, having hailed from the same training that Kanao went through. 

As sweet and loving as she was, (y/n) could be just as violent; albeit, Zenitsu and the gang had only seen this side when she fought demons. Her violence was through a silent battle that she knew she would win, and her swordplay was fascinating to the eye. Her mother was a dancer, somewhat similar to Tanjiro’s father, and her mother had taught her everything she needed to know about dance.

However, life wasn’t too kind. (y/n) lost her mother when she was 12 and had been training under Shinobu to become a demon slayer since. She had learned the breath of the flower from Shinobu, but developed her own style scheme by performing different moves through dance. It was, to say the least, impressive.

(y/n) and Inosuke shared a rather weird relationship. 

The first time they met was in between their missions. All four of them were surrounded by a total of seven demons. Inosuke stepped in wanting to be the one to take down everyone, but quietly, (y/n) held him back (almost yelled at but the second Inosuke’s gaze met hers, he grew strangely quiet, which was unlike him). 

     “We need to plan this out. When you’re cornered, you don’t attack head-on. That’s suicide.”

She turned to Inosuke’s mask and grinned, “You’re better alive than dead, right?”

Zenitsu didn’t miss the fuwa fuwa that came out of his boar friend right then, but he was shitting his pants for something else entirely. It was after that did she introduce herself, rather peppily, and seemed like the most happy-go-lucky person they had ever laid their eyes on. Inosuke seemed particularly soft with her, which was very unlike him, but no one made any comment about it. 

     “So Inosuke, why did you become a demon slayer?” (y/n) asked, with a chirpy voice.

Zenitsu and Tanjiro watched as the white puffballs around Inosuke grew in number but the male grunted and walked away, leaving (y/n) there with a confused but happy smile.

     “What happened?”

Zenitsu hit himself on the forehead.

The thing that Zenitsu’s mind was plagued with was this: How would Inosuke behave if he was in love with someone?

For this, he’d need to understand how animals behaved. When an animal finds a potential mate, the male of the species would perform a series of activities in order to impress the female of the species. Like, in birds, the male bird would perform a wide range of dance moves or hops to impress the female, who would display her interest by signalling in and chirping accordingly.

Cut to what they were doing a few weeks ago. They were at the butterfly estate, all four of them, and Tanjiro and (y/n) were talking about him selling charcoal for a living. She was a good listener, and for Tanjiro, it was nice to be heard for a change. Perhaps, in Inosuke’s mind, Tanjiro was another male boar, showcasing his skills (Zenitsu wondered if ‘kindness’ can count as a skill) and (y/n) was considering him. Inosuke however, had a better skill—brisk loudness, and the ability to have anyone’s eye on him for longer durations of time because he was just that distracting.

     “(y/n)!” 

Ah yes, he also never forgot her name for a strange reason, but she only thought that was because he didn’t deem her a threat.

(y/n) were right, in a way.

She turned her head toward Inosuke who was holding his two swords near the courtyard. Zenitsu stood a few feet away from where (y/n) and Tanjiro sat, and watched with an unimpressed expression on his face. This wasn’t amusing in the slightest for the blond, for he had seen men pile up over women and behave in a way they otherwise wouldn’t do. But, in Inosuke’s case, it was definitely...weird.

Upon receiving (y/n)’s attention, Inosuke flipped his blades around in the air and did a few stunts, causing (y/n)’s eyes to widen with absolute amusement. Tanjiro smiled a tad bit, before turning to a disgruntled Zenitsu, and understanding thus what was going on. 

     “Whoa, that’s amazing, Inosuke!” (y/n) said, clapping her hands together.

Tanjiro noticed the white fluff balls come out of the boar boy’s head as his actions suddenly stopped. He might have been raised an animal, but Tanjiro’s heart melted at the realization that Inosuke craved the feelings of attention and kindness from people around him, just as much as he wanted to prove himself superior. Inosuke felt a range of things with the two of them, but with (y/n), he certainly felt softer. And whatever the reason might be, Tanjiro believed his friend deserved it—the boy was pure at heart. 

Coming back to the theory Zenitsu had. Tanjiro approached the boy that evening before having a quick word with him over Inosuke’s obsession with impressing you. Both of them knew that it was more than a crush, but it was also quite out of character. While Tanjiro could swallow Inosuke’s need to be softer with her, Zenitsu thought Inosuke believed it was a competition.

     “Well,” Tanjiro pondered, “It might be, in his head. That was how he was raised and that’s how he thinks? Maybe, if we don’t prove a threat to him, he’ll learn better on understanding how to communicate his feelings.”

Zenitsu scoffed, “That idiot won’t know what feelings are if it hit him on his face like a brick. He thinks like an animal!”

Tanjiro chuckled, “Doesn’t mean animals can’t love,” He turned to spot Inosuke and (y/n) in an animated conversation about butterflies, “Most often, they love better than the rest of us.”

Therefore, the two of them decided to watch Inosuke. Zenitsu did it for his own amusement, but Tanjiro enjoyed merely understanding his friend’s nature. There were three things that Inosuke had to fall under if he were in love with (y/n)—and this was all based on observation. Tanjiro knew how animals thought and behaved to a fair extent, and with his knowledge, analysing Inosuke’s behavior around her seemed like the perfect study.

#1. One mate is territorial over the other.

Zenitsu approached (y/n) one evening, wanting to call her over for dinner. She turned to the blond before waving at him, and having him sit beside her. 

     “Hi, Zenitsu-kun. Is there something you need?”

He wondered where his boar friend was at that second. There was no point to this exercise if Inosuke wasn’t around. Not that he minded having a conversation with (y/n), she was sweet. He turned to her after realizing Inosuke wasn’t around and wondered what she thought of him. 

     “So, Inosuke,” She blinked at his words, “He’s weird, right?”

     “Not at all. I think he’s really sweet.” 

Zenitsu blinked, “Really? Even though he doesn’t understand a lot of social cues? It’s because he was raised in the mountains—”

     “I find that bit fascinating, actually. Even though he was raised in the mountains, he’s so kind.”

     “How is he kind?” Zenitsu grumbled.

(y/n) blinked at the blond’s question. 

     “Do you...not like Inosuke-kun?”

Zenitsu shook his head, “It’s not like that, I just think he’s too much sometimes. Abrasive and rash—it’s like taking care of a loud kid!”

She giggled, “I like that about him! Keeps things lively.”

Zenitsu wasn’t sure now on who the weird one was. With (y/n) defending Inosuke like her life depended on it, it was certain that even she had a soft spot for the boy. But, he couldn’t tell if it was built out of sympathy or romantic feelings like he had. She was just kind, maybe, she defended Zenitsu behind his back (although this thought made him swoon on the inside). 

     “Where is he anyway?” (y/n) grumbled, frowning a bit.

It was at that second when Tanjiro came to the courtyard. (y/n) greeted the brown haired boy before blinking up at him. 

     “Tanjiro-kun, have you seen Inosuke-kun?”

Tanjiro hummed before saying, “Hm, I think he left with Kanao-chan somewhere?”

Zenitsu ‘ah’ed before understanding where the boar boy had gone now. Kanao and Inosuke had been training together for a bit, it wasn’t strange since Inosuke always wanted to get stronger than the others. With Tanjiro having beaten Kanao in that little game, Inosuke wanted to do the same. The boy thought everything was a competition. 

     “Oh?”

Tanjiro almost didn’t notice it, but it was good that he was great at capturing certain scents. Growing up with so many siblings had him understand how to differentiate between the scents of various emotions. When (y/n) stood up, waved to them and left, Tanjiro chuckled, catching Zenitsu’s attention. He wasn’t always certain about a lot of things, but he was sure that he had caught the right scent here.

     “What’s so funny?”

It was the scent of jealousy, he thought before shaking his head.

#2.  One mate tries to impress the other by being the best they can be.

Zenitsu hated missions, and he especially hated them when he had to go with Inosuke. However, the only thing holding his sanity together was that (y/n) had offered to tag along—since her crow was nowhere to be found. Inosuke was thrilled and secretly so was the blond, because now Inosuke seemed controllable. He didn’t know how it worked, but he was glad that it did.

They were to head to a village to find a demon behind a few missing people. Apparently, these people headed to work one day and never returned—and this being near a river, there were chances that this demon resided under water.

     “Can you swim, (y/n)-chan?” 

     “Yes, actually. I didn’t learn it the easy way, though. Shinobu-san basically threw me into the river and forced me to learn the hard way.” She said, dejectedly.

     “When you’re about to drown, your body learns to float!” Inosuke yelled, catching your attention.

     “Y-Yeah, I mean, I was the first one to learn too! Inosuke, I also know what plants you can eat from under water!”

     “You can eat underwater plants?!”

     “Yes! I’ll show you someday! When they’re added into your food, it’s so delicious!”

He couldn’t understand where the fuwa fuwa was coming from now—Zenitsu noticed that the fluffballs were everywhere. He wasn’t sure which mate was trying to impress the other here. 

Tanjiro, Zenitsu thought, who exactly is the animal here? 

He normally never did this, but Zenitsu was curious beyond belief! Therefore, he shut his eyes, paused for a brief moment and let his ears do the detective work. All he could hear were sounds of two hearts fluttering in harmony, an image stuck to his brain that he couldn’t wipe off (and if he was a softer, more mature individual, he would admit that the image was a rather sweet one), but Zenitsu being Zenitsu hated the fact that his mountain boy friend was in love with a sweet crackhead like (y/n)—who in retaliation was in love with a mountain boy as well.

#3. A manner of softness not seen anywhere else.

It was strange to see Inosuke being quiet—it was either only when he was in deep sleep or deep thought (which was very, very rare indeed). However, the mountain boy grew quiet a lot these days; especially because (y/n) hung out a lot whenever the boys were around. He’d watch her, observing her movements, trying to replicate whatever ‘decent’ moves she made like trying to eat with chopsticks or not wearing the mask as much when she’s around.

In all honestly, it was quite evident that Inosuke tried being a human being around her and it was sweet, Tanjiro noted, that he’d try so hard to accommodate to (y/n). 

However, Zenitsu didn’t think it was sweet. He wanted to vomit inside his mouth each time he thought of the boar boy being in love, particularly because it was the sort of love that was rare even for civilized people. The blond always had trouble finding people who accepted him for being who he was, and here was someone like Inosuke—whose personality was somehow revered instead of being shunned. 

What the hell is going on? He thought, grumbling, as he witnessed (y/n) crawl over to Inosuke, as if to sneak up on the boy. Normally, Zenitsu would have yelled and alerted his friend, but he just didn’t care anymore—it was comical, and he’d let it be.

     “Inosuke!” (y/n) pounced on the boar boy from the back, tackling him to the ground, surprising him.

Inosuke blinked, his face a dark red, before screaming in playful anger. 

     “What the hell are you doing?!”

     “Fight me!”

Inosuke’s eyes widened just for a brief moment before he growled and tackled her back, causing her to giggle and try to escape the boar boy’s advances. Now, he was chasing her around the estate, something little animals do when they play with one another. Tanjiro smiled at the sight before Zenitsu noticed fluffballs come around him.

I’ve had enough of this.

Walking over to his boar friend, he grabbed the boy from the back of his mask before yanking it off in one go. Inosuke would never mind beating the living daylight out of his blond friend, but the expression Zenitsu had just then caused him to still his movements. (y/n) paused before blinking up at Zenitsu, tilting her head slightly at the sudden halt.

     “Zenitsu-kun? Is something wrong?”

     “You two are what’s wrong!”

Inosuke growned, “What? You wanna—”

     “NO! I don’t want to fight! Do you honestly not see what’s going on here?!” 

(y/n) giggled before saying, “Inosuke and I are just fooling around—”

     “I thought we were fighting—”

     “We are, but it isn’t a fight where we hurt each other.”

     “Yes! I was thinking the same thing!”

Zenitsu slapped his forehead. He pointed to Inosuke and then pointed to (y/n). Tanjiro approached them before placing a calm hand on his blond friend. 

     “You are clearly in love with her and you are clearly in love with him!”

Inosuke didn’t look like he understood what Zenitsu had blurted out, but (y/n) was civilized where Inosuke wasn’t and just then Zenitsu had called her out rather harshly—but, it was the kind of harsh that was perhaps justified. Her eyes widened and she turned to spot Inosuke grab the blond and put him in a choke hold, but her movements stilled. She looked up to Tanjiro who gave her a kind smile before she bit her lip.

Of course she knew she loved Inosuke. Of course, she wasn’t blind. Ever since she first laid eyes on the beast boy, her mind was picked, her heart was his, and her body did things on its own—wanting to impress him, wanting to stand out and make sure Inosuke remembers her name instead of anyone else’s; she wanted to be special to him, and from all her tries, she was bound to know that her feelings for him were nothing short of romantic. 

However, could he perceive romance? Could Inosuke know what these feelings were and could he act on them? Was she the only one making the effort here? She turned to spot Inosuke fighting with Zenitsu the same way he was fighting with her and she began to wonder, ‘What if I’m actually no different?’

Tanjiro smelled the sudden hesitance radiating off of her, but before she could get anywhere, he approached her.

     “(y/n)-chan, I’m sure Inosuke feels the same way—”

     “Tanjiro-kun,” (y/n) wasn’t sure where the sudden hesitance grew inside her. “I just... I need to figure some things out on my own before I...” She turned to spot Inosuke taking off his mask, growling at the blond. 

She gave him a soft smile, confusing the hell out of him, before walking back inside the estate. 

     “Where’s she going?” Inosuke asked, blinking at her retrieving figure.

Tanjiro turned to his friend, curious. 

     “What do you feel for (y/n)-chan, Inosuke?”

     “HAH?” 

     “That’s what I’ve been trying to get him to talk about! But he keeps tackling me!” Zenitsu yelled from the background.

     “What feel for her? She’s (y/n)!”

Tanjiro’s eyes widened almost comically at how Inosuke remembered her name so accurately. 

     “Why do you remember her name so well?”

     “She’s important!”

Tanjiro blinked some more, “Important how?”

Inosuke growled, losing interest in this conversation, “(y/n) is...” He couldn’t find her and that bothered him. He looked to where she had gone off to before frowning some more.

     “Inosuke,” Tanjiro’s soft voice broke his reverie. “Do you love her?”

He didn’t know what love was, but there were a few things Inosuke was sure of. Whenever he saw (y/n), he wanted to be around her more—just like the pair of wolves he had come across as a child. The male wolf would wind its neck under the female’s whenever it was cold, and it was something Inosuke saw himself doing with her, and no one else. He remembered the swans dancing around in the water with one another, attaching themselves by every inch of their feathers and Inosuke wanted nothing more than to learn how her skin felt against his. 

He recalled the group of monkeys that was led by a strong male and a fat female, which was fat because the male had given her his babies. One day, Inosuke dreamed of having little Inosuke babies with (y/n).

If this was what love was then what Inosuke felt for (y/n) was much, much more.

Growling, he ran off to where (y/n) might have gone, and noticed you sitting by the engawa. Taking off his mask, Inosuke sat beside her without warning, and noticed her red face. His eyes widened when he saw that expression on (y/n)—and all the thoughts he had were starting to vanish. Sure, the animals looked happy and did things he wanted to do, but no animal could compare to how beautiful she looked right then. He gulped before leaning closer to her, smelling her face—unsure of what to do at a time like this. Inosuke didn’t want to scare her, but he was confident that she would not be scared.

Zenitsu did not count a fourth thing that Inosuke would fall under if he was in love. The ability to change and adapt for a certain someone.

     “Inosuke, do you... do you know what love is?”

He didn’t, and he sure as hell was scared to tell her that he had no idea.

     “What I feel for you... I want to be around you all the time. I want to hold your hand and... and hold you in my arms and touch your hair—”

Inosuke grabbed (y/n)’s hand forcefully before placing it on his hair, but paused when he noticed her wince.

     “Did I hurt you?”

(y/n) smiled warmly, her heart beating rapidly as she shook her head, “I’m not sure if you know what love is, Inosuke...” 

He frowned, “I don’t know what to tell you.” 

He was an animal, born and raised in conditions that other people could have perhaps not survived. There was very little he knew about the ways of how human beings displayed affection. However, there was one way he was sure of—one way that could perhaps show her what he felt. Prove to her that whatever this love emotion was, it had nothing on him.

Because what Inosuke felt for (y/n) was far, far stronger than some stupid emotion.

He leaned forward and kissed her, grabbing the back of her hair. (y/n) had no idea where he had learned how to kiss, and even if he knew what this meant, but a second later, Inosuke’s tongue darted downwards to her neck, biting it lightly, marking the texture of her soft skin. His hand was firm behind her head and he pulled lightly, pressing her to him—before leaning back and capturing her lips again.

(y/n)’s eyes were wide and she was almost breathless; unsure of how to react, her hands slowly travelled to his hair and she buried her fingers in his hair, marvelling at how soft his locks were. She kissed back slowly, and did not miss the passion Inosuke brought forth with what he was doing. Once again, he pulled away before reaching her collarbone and biting lightly. The second (y/n) let out a soft moan, Inosuke stopped.

     “Do you feel warm?”

Her face rivalled a spider lily. Of course she felt warm!

Inosuke looked at her and smirked, “A male marks his female, in the mountains, this is how beasts mark their mates.”

(y/n)’s eyes widened. Mate? She blinked before grabbing his face and studying it, almost enthralled with what she had learned.

     “Inosuke, there is so much you need to learn!”

But, the second she thought of how his tongue travelled to her neck and collarbone, maybe, he didn’t have to learn much after all.

*

When Inosuke’s firstborn son turned out to be a bit timid, Inosuke acquired the ability—acting out on empathy. (y/n) watched him, hold his five-year old son after the boy had fallen off a small tree and hurt his knee.

     “This is going to sting,” Inosuke said, before putting some pressure on to the little boy’s wound, along with a raw medicine he had made to prevent any infection. 

The boy cried instantly, which caused Inosuke to turn to (y/n), who was cradling their third born daughter, with a smile on her face. He wouldn’t reveal to a great many people that watching his son wince and cry hurt his chest more than anything ever had, but watching (y/n) smile back at him, as he sat there with a smile on his face made him appreciate everything that was soft in the world.

He had stopped asking people to fight him because honestly, it turned exhausting. After having three children, Inosuke had had enough—he wanted to mellow down and sit back, smell his wife’s hair and watch their children grow. He often wondered how Tanjiro and the others were doing, and he thought of how the life in the city was not one for him at all. He hoped that their paths would cross one day, but turning to (y/n), as their youngest daughter cooed in (y/n)’s arms, Inosuke was at peace.

     “What are you staring at!? Fight me!”

Inosuke narrowed his eyes and turned to his three-year old girl, whose expressions and personality rivalled his own. He heard (y/n) chuckle from the back before ignoring her and getting up, grabbing the little girl by her ankle and having her dangle upside down.

     “This—”

     “Stop it, runt.” 

Oh, but he would not deny how much he adored that feisty little spirit of hers. She growled before pinching her father’s hold, causing him to abruptly let her go, as she landed on the ground with a ‘thud’. She got back up and rushed to her father, hands around his neck, Inosuke grumbling before picking her up. If only he had understood that his cries ‘fight me’ were a sign of being touch-starved, he’d have avoided a great many unnecessary fights.

     “Let me go—”

     “Shut up.”

Inosuke’s hand wrapped around his small daughter’s form before running it up and down on her back, calming her down. The child’s eyes widened before she quieted down, and returning her father’s embrace.

A small tug at his sleeve made him look at his son now, who gave him a needy look as well. Inosuke knelt down and picked up his boy, before hugging both of them, standing like a tree in the middle of the house.

     “Never thought you’d turn into such a softie, Inosuke!” (y/n) giggled, before expecting a shout or a loud comeback.

Instead, her eyes widened when she saw him smile at her, each hand cradling his children, as he watched her, with the softest eyes he could conjure.

Honestly, she could never let down the way he told her he loved her each day, not through words, not through mindless actions, but merely by looking at her like his entire life belonged to her. For a man raised in the mountains, Inosuke knew how to love better than the rest of humanity itself.

If only Zenitsu could see the man now, she thought, chuckling.

[rein-ette]

If you still fancy a drabble prompt, I've always seen Canada and England having a very warm and comfortable relationship- if it interests you, maybe a prompt could be one going to the other for advice about something?

It does indeed interest me, thank you for the prompt! I've had a bunch of Mattie-Arthur scenarios swimming around in my mind for a long time, so I'm glad to have a chance to put one of them down on paper. As always, this was supposed to be a "drabble" but magically lengthened itself the more I thought about it -- I don't think drabbles are supposed to have historical notes.

"Come in."

Matthew shifted his pile of papers to his other arm and pushed through the door of Arthur's office. Inside, the fading afternoon light illuminated the rich mahogony floor and danced on the spines of the hundreds of books that lined each wall. Remembering the excitement he felt when he was first allowed to peruse these shelves, Matthew couldn't help but smile softly to himself.

Arthur himself sat at his desk, one ankle propped up on his knee as he stared idly out the window. Matthew could just barely see a white trim of bandages that peeked out from underneath his collar. That dimmed his smile. It had been more than two years now since the war had ended in Europe, but Arthur still looked as gaunt as he did during the days when engines still roared over London and — though Matthew had not thought it possible — even more exhausted. The worn smile Arthur offered him said as much, and Matthew pushed away a twinge of guilt.

Arthur jerked his chin at the seat in front of his desk and Matthew sat, stacking his documents in a neat pile in front of him. Instead of immediately going through them, however, he gazed worriedly at his old guardian.

"How are you feeling?"

Arthur sighed and shifted in his seat, dropping his leg and turning to face Matthew. He stared at the ancient, ink-stained wood of his desk for a while, and Matthew could almost see the warring emotions on Arthur's face as his desire to be honest fought with his lingering instinct to conceal and protect Matthew from the worries that plagued him. But because they were past such pretenses, he finally murmured, "Tired."

Matthew hummed sympathetically in response. There wasn't much he could do or say to change that, and he expected the reports he brought would only exhaust Arthur further. So he merely asked, "Are you remembering to apply the salve twice a day?"

Matthew flushed a little when Arthur rolled his eyes at him good-naturedly, realizing he was fussing like Arthur was his child, instead of the other way around. Thankfully, Arthur spared him further embarrasment by only answering a tad dryly that yes, he was actually capable of following simple instructions. Matthew mumbled out a reply before deciding that he might as well get on with what he was actually here for, knowing Arthur had never been one for small talk. Clearing his throat, he slid the top half of his stack of papers across the desk.

"They sent you a copy of Lord Mountbatten's plan, I think with annotations, though I haven't gone through the whole thing. And this part is the proposal for the national flag. Also," he pulled a cream letter from the pile and passed that over as well, "India asked that you be there personally, in August," he finished.

Arthur hummed and rifled through the papers. Matthew couldn't quite read his expression. After a few moments, he stacked them again and placed them to the side, with the letter on top. "Thanks. I'll go through them later."

Matthew nodded. "And here I just summarized the letters and stuff from the others. I've left them back in the box, in case you wanted to read them yourself. There's not too much going on really. That you don't already know."

"Yes. Thank you. This is a great help, Matthew, truly."

"You're welcome," Matthew murmured, and watched Arthur scan the notes before setting them aside as well. His eyes traced the shadows underneath the other nation's eyes, before dropping back down to the cotton bandages around his neck. He wondered if Arthur was sleeping at all.

"Is there anything else I can do? I'm heading back to Ottawa next week, but if you need me to take over some stuff for a bit, I can stay longer —"

"No, no, it's fine," Arthur cut him off. "Like I said, I'm just a little tired, that's all. But all this," he waved a hand at the documents , "isn't anything new."

Matthew frowned. "Isn't it?"

"Hmm?"

"I mean, I know the paperwork isn't new, but, these," he drew a breath, "reforms, and the war, of course. That's — I mean. No one's, you know, had to deal with that, before."

Arthur frowned, and traced a finger along the edge of his desk, before sighing, "No, I guess not." He turned again to look out the window behind him. After several long moments, he said, quietly, "But it's not entirely unexpected, either. I just—" The corner of his lips jerked down, and for a moment it seemed as if he was almost in pain. He drew in a breath, and said, "It's just. Difficult. That's all. To—but." He stopped again, grimaced, as if at his own ineloquence. Finally, he said, slowly, as carefully as if he was embroidering the words onto the air between them, "The world is changing. Let us not stand in the way, lest they make us out to be fools."

Watching him struggle, Matthew found himself at a loss as well. Never had he imagined that Arthur — sharp-tongued, quick-witted Arthur, who could neither be bullied nor silenced, who could quote from more books than Matthew had ever read — would be scrambling for words. But then, as he watched Arthur's shoulders curve in towards himself like Matthew had seen a thousand times before in another stubborn, sandy-haired nation who also seemed to have endless words but never quite the right ones, he knew what he needed to do.

Smiling again, Matthew stood, drawing on Arthur's arm so he would turn to face him and said, "I think you need a hug."

Unnecessarily Long Notes are Unnecessarily Long

I didn't state the specific setting of this scene, but the timing of the historical events mentioned means it has to have been sometime between June and August of 1947. Despite the fact that Mattie says "not much is going on", my lord, a lot was going on in 1947; hence why Artie is doing his best impression of the walking dead. Besides the Indian and Pakistan independence movement, officially achieved in August 1947 which is alluded to (Mountbatten, or 3 June Plan, was the precursor to the Indian Independence Act of 1947), Europe was also going through complete social upheaval. To mention just a couple highlights: Germany was in such ruin it was said to have returned to the Roman ages, Britain was rationing harder than ever despite the war having ended, and of course Mr. Truman and Mr. Stalin were gearing up for the Great Showdown. A quote I like which captures the feeling of the time is from H.G. Wells: "[where] other civilizations rolled and crumbled down, the European civilization was, as it were, blown up." [quoted by Tony Judt, Postwar]. Also directly concerning Arthur was the issue of Palestine, which as we all know was and is contentious, to say the very least.

Arthur's attitude to decolonisation is...complicated. Clearly I went with a softer view here, but certainly not all (or even many) British held the view in 1947 that the Empire should be decolonized at all. Hence Arthur during this time was probably a raging hypocrite and, if he wasn't already, at least 50% psychologically unstable. However, I allowed Arthur a little dignity here, in part because he's 2000 years old and as such should have a tiny more perspective than us humans, and also because the weakness of the Empire was much more evident to those in government and the army. Even if it wasn't popular opinion yet, anyone with half a braincell could see that every day Britian didn't decolonize was costing them more than they could afford. Additionally, Britain did decolonise much, much faster than all the other powers and in a relatively peaceful and orderly manner, though what ensued in the countries they left behind was neither. I should also add that Matthew is not the most objective of narrators either -- Canada, despite being a former colony, was still strongly Anglophilic, especially right after WWII. Still, I hope ya'll won't begrudge Arthur a hug.

[freshouttaparsnips]

But, despite his best efforts, Edge was awake before him that morning, noticing that Papyrus was nowhere to be found, waking Sans on the couch with a near violent shake. Sans glared up at him, Edge glaring back before whispering a harsh “Sorry. Where’s your brother.”

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woooo, this fic won the poll from the Helping-A-Friend Drive (sorta, it was a two way tie and I chose this), so it’s getting updated until its done!!

ya’ll might read back a bit, this is chapter 9 lol

reader it on Ao3

or read it below!!

(and check out the post explaining my drive and how to help!)

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It wasn’t very long after the Fell brothers showed up, perhaps a week at most that Sans felt a change in the air. It was familiar, unfortunately, and it… was coming at a really bad time, actually. Neither of the dust bros would have any idea of what to do about any of it, which was a problem all on its own.

The actual issue was something else entirely, but he couldn’t really be honest about it. Grillby was the only one of anyone that knew anything about it, and Sans would really have rather kept it that way.

But, despite his best efforts, Edge was awake before him that morning, noticing that Papyrus was nowhere to be found, waking Sans on the couch with a near violent shake. Sans glared up at him, Edge glaring back before whispering a harsh “Sorry. Where’s your brother.”

Sans blinked. “What’dya mean? Isn’t he usually out runnin’ with you around now?”

Edge was quiet for a disconcertingly long time, before finally answering. “Normally, yes, we would be halfway done with our run.” He glanced up the stairs at Papyrus’ room, the door firmly shut, the “No One Allowed!” sign hung.

Well. At least Paps had done Sans the decency of putting the sign up. That was always nice.

“It’s alright buddy.” Sans finally drawled, scratching at his back as he sat up. “But we should head out for a while. Grab your bro and lets skedaddle.”

Edge looked about two seconds from arguing, but Sans deadeyed him long enough that he scowled, turning on heel and stomping up the steps.

It was a good thing Paps had his room soundproofed when they came up here. That was for damn sure.

Red finally tromped down the steps after a very grumpy Edge, the two of them looking like they were about to start a fire for fun or something if Sans didn’t start explaining himself pretty quick. Good thing he had about zero plans to.

“Alright, grab your coats, kiddos, we’re goin’ on a field trip.”

He didn’t give them much actual time to argue, grabbing them both by the arm and taking a short cut the straight hell outta there. Papyrus didn’t need the two of them breathing down his neck while he was dealing with shit… and none of the running had to do with Sans not wanting to be anywhere near the house for a while, nope.

No, this was entirely pragmatic, beneficial for all of them, and they could pick up a few of the essentials on the way there.

~.~

It took a couple pit stops, and a bit of dodging whenever they actually got to their destination, but when Sans finally let them get a good look at their surroundings, the bones stopped flying (he was pretty sure they weren’t actually aiming for him), and their sockets got wide.

Living on the west coast had its benefits, mostly the ocean. Sans took the kid out here at least once a month, Toriel usually accompanying them for the sole reason that she actually really enjoyed sunbathing. Wasn’t cause she and Sans had been best friends for a long ass time, ‘course not.

“Is that…” Edge started, before stopping as Sans stuff a plastic bag first in his, then Red’s hands.

“The ocean? Yeah, don’t go too far out or we’ll see if skeletons can actually drown.” Turning to Red, he gave a wink. “There changing rooms over yonder, I got you both a t-shirt and trunks. I hope they fit.”

And with that he turned on foot, heading straight down towards the beach, the water looking as chilly and inviting as possible on such a warm day. It was a shame… Papyrus would have loved to see the utter hidden joy in Edge’s eyes as he grabbed Red and pulled him towards the changing rooms.

Sans let them at it, it wasn’t like they were going anywhere else with this opportunity right in front of them, and besides, Sans had someone he’d been waiting to see for a while.

“Sans!! Sans you little goofbone, we are over here!” Toriel’s voice carried over the crowd, but Sans didn’t give a shit who looked to see who was shouting. He only had eyes for the Queen of all Monsters, and the child that sat on a beach blanket next to her.

“Heya Tori. Long time no see.” He answered, padding through the sand to stand next to their little picnic spot. The kid was chomping down on a sandwich, a little juice box next to them on the blanket. Toriel was laid out, like usual, but was sitting up a little to greet little old him. “Nice to sea you.”

Toriel laughed, the sound loud and abrasive in the best of ways. Taking a breath, she grinned sharp. “Shell we settle down and talk a little? Perhaps ketchup on current events?” She held up a ketchup packet, Sans snorting at the obvious pun before he waddled close enough to plop next to her on the blanket.

“Yeah, that sounds great actually.” Settling in, he wiggled into her ample back, ignoring her laughter as she swatted at him, though still letting him lay where he wanted.

“So who are your guests?” Toriel finally asked, watching Frisk, who’d given Sans a look before taking off towards the water.

Sans sighed, really not wanting to spill the beans so early, but Toriel had actually figured it out on her own pretty quick. When he’d gotten a call, the texting not working on her phone again for whatever stars forsaken reason, she’d mentioned going to the beach, and he’d agreed to come. Then Papyrus coming had been brought up, and Sans was really bad at lying actually, when he thought about it.

“They’re cousins. I think. I dunno skeleton family lines, we probably aren’t even related.”

Toriel hummed to herself. “How fortunate. The tall one is very fine.”

Sans choked on air, tears breaking over his sockets as he laughed. “What the hell!” he garbled out, though he watched as Edge and Red slowly made their way over, clearly unnerved by the amount of humans.

“I only speak the truth.” Toriel whispered, sure of herself as she smirked, standing to her full height to greet the murder bros.

“Hello! I’m told you are not related to Sans, but that you know him. You are very welcome to share in our picnic, I brought plenty of food.”

Red was staring gobsmacked, clearly looking for similarities in the Toriel he’d once known, while Edge was looking purely intimidated.

“I… Thank you, your majesty, but we couldn’t possibly-” Edge tried, but Toriel only gave him a look.

She gently took his hand from his chest, patting it once before leading him over to the blanket. “When I say there’s enough, there’s enough. Take a break, guardsman, you’re no longer in the presence of royalty.”

Sans was pretty well gobsmacked himself, if he was honest, but sitting there on the blanket, watching Toriel work the brothers in the sly, kind way she did everyone that started out difficult… it was awe inspiring.

He only hoped Paps was okay, this time.

[hansols-yoda-boxers]

Camp North Star - Ending Ment

This isn't part of the story, I’m just being mushy. Full word count is at the end tho hehe

I wanna start by saying thank you to anyone who read this. I started planning last summer so it was a long time in the making and so much about me had changed in that time I don’t need to get super emotional so suffice it to say I put so many hours of writing, planning, and thought into this au and I love any of you who gave it love.

Thank you to all the anons that sent in asks about or for the au. Massive thank you to @thetypingpup for reading so much of this series and sending in so many asks and getting into the interaction even though you don’t stan some of the groups, you are truly awesome.

Thank you to @delicatewerewolfsoul @gamerwoo and Matcha Anon for letting me talk your ears off about this au and bouncing ideas off of you as I went and encouraging me. Thank you for letting me get excited about it.

Thank you to @queenaliceofthenight and @absentcaryatid for leaving so many comments and reading so freaking much. I saw every comment and tag and reblog and you do not know to happy that made me that someone else found as much joy in this as I did. Some of the comments you made live in my brain and will forever because they mean so much.

Thank you to @lustjoong for being an enabler and making both woosan and seongjoong more angsty than originally planned <////3 okay all joking aside you responded to every preview I sent you with so much enthusiasm and love and support it made me so excited to write those parts just to know what you would say. I love you so much you precious lil angel bean.

And last but very far from least, @shuaskitty oh my god. Ma’am? A whole google doc all the way through packed full of comments, thoughts, gifs, and reaction memes some of which you maDE JUST TO REACT TO MY FIC?????? Honestly just take my hand in marriage who else will treat me this well? You are a fantastic lady and I love you and every time I saw the clover emoji I got so excited.

Okay, shall we see the word count?

May + June Doc - 23 833 July Doc  - 44 096 Aug + Sept Doc - 28 664 Spin Off Doc - 29 356 Group Sex Doc - 32 289

Full Word Count - 158 238

Okay holy fuck I knew it would be big but geez. That is a lot of words. That’s more than I thought I could do wow. 

I hope ya’ll liked this au. I’ve had fun with it and with all of you enjoying it <3