#bullied my sister and started stealing stuff from her closet until she got out of bed to go on a walk with my mom

[weewooooweew]

i have great ideas

[earnestly-endlessly]

Do you mind doing a list of your favourite modern AUs? A mix is powered and non-powered fics is okay :) TY!

I'm so sorry how late I am with this, but here’s my looooong list of my favourite modern AUs. I hope that you like this list and can find some fics in there that you haven’t read before. Enjoy!

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Cherik Modern AU Fic Recs 

Sprich Mit Mir | Talk To Me – dreamweavers

Summary: When Charles meets Erik on a midnight train to London, it’s like all of his Christmases and birthdays have come at once – until Erik opens his mouth, and reveals he cannot speak a word of English.

It isn’t easy to pursue a relationship with someone you need to play Pictionary with just to chat to, but with a little help from Charles’ telepathy, the two language-barrier lovers are determined to make it work.

Come as you are – scarlettblush

Summary: Hospital AU. The one where Charles unknowingly woos a coma patient with Pride and Prejudice. Years later, they meet again.

The Man on the Train – Sophia_Bee

Summary: Charles is heading home from a shift at the busy emergency department of the urban hospital where he works as a nurse. He meets Dr. Erik Lehnsherr on the train, who is clearly interested in Charles, but Charles has a rule. He does not date doctors. Not at all. Never, ever ever. But he does shake his ass at Erik, which might be his downfall.

Eyes on Fire – Black_Betty

Summary: Every once in a while, fashion tycoon Emma Frost invites her favourite male models over to entertain her. And by "entertain", I mean she makes them have kinky consensual sex in front of her....Emma never touches herself when she watches, but she always has a glass of wine with her. Emma likes it best when they eventually forget that she's watching.

Charles and Erik meet each other through Emma...

(I've taken some liberties with the prompt, but all the sex is still there, and it's wholly consensual...and gradually, becomes more than just sex...)

Paper Monsters – Clocks

Summary: Fill for this prompt: Charles meets Erik Lehnsherr, his favorite novelist of all time at a coffee shop, but doesn't know it's him, and Erik just criticizes his own writing in front of his biggest fan.

Order Up - ikeracity

Summary: Charles has a terrible habit of multitasking, and that is probably why he absentmindedly tells the pizza man that he loves him when hanging up. Then the pizza man says it back. And Charles is pretty much smitten from there.

Some Things Are Meant To Be – Ikeracity

Summary: Erik is a famous singer. Charles is a closeted fan. When Raven drags him to Erik's concert, the last thing Charles expects is for Erik to single him out of the crowd, for Erik to look right at him as he sings. And the last, last thing he expects is for Erik to personally serenade him and pull him on stage and kiss him senseless, because some things are meant to be and Erik knows it.

Rumor Mill – Ikeracity

Summary: Erik is the grumpiest, most foul tempered worker at Stark industries. His grumpiness is the stuff of legends. So it's obviously the talk of the office when Erik is being made to go to the company party and he's bringing his husband. There's rumors flying round about how much of a masochist or equally antisocial bastard Erik's husband must be to put up with him. Others think he must be a meek mouse perhaps bullied by Erik.

What they weren't expecting was the confident, charming, adorable and unbelievably nice Charles that turns up on Erik's arm. What they certainly weren't expecting was how much Erik obviously adores his husband and how happy he is to let others see this.

Serendipity – humanveil

Summary: Charles sends a text to the wrong number.

[10:22 AM]

Can we meet for coffee? I just got dumped.

[10:30 AM]

I think you've got the wrong number.

[10:31 AM]

Unless you make a habit of texting people you don't know about this sort of thing?

A Nice Boy (The Family Matters Edition) – pocky_slash

Summary: Erik's not sure whether the problem is that he doesn't want his parents to meet Charles or that he doesn't want Charles to meet his parents. Either way, he never invites Charles to brunch. Why should he? It's not like they're dating.

Frosted Hearts – aesc, palalife

Summary: Emma Frost has 99 problems, but a date ain't one. Specifically, she has no time to play the dating game--which is fine with her, because she'd much rather run it instead. From a set of sleek, silver and white offices on Fifth Avenue and with her trusty, stylish, and silent partner Janos Quested, Emma has built Frosted Hearts into New York City's premiere dating service, built on the principle that money, and a sufficiently rigorous psionic scan, can, in fact, buy you love.

Somewhere in Frosted Hearts's server is one Charles Xavier, genius and geneticist, with the kind of nicely-starched good looks that sell well on brochures for New England prep schools. He's also a telepath who's decided to give up pursuing serious relationships and instead spend his thirties doing what he should have done as a teenager: have a lot of sex with random people. Fortunately for him, Erik Lehnsherr, metallokinetic and engineering executive, has absolutely no time in his heart or his schedule for anything more serious than... well, absolutely nothing romantic at all.

Work/Life Balance – pocky_slash

Summary: As teens, Charles was the star of a super popular tween/teen television show and Erik was his best friend. As adults, they're a frighteningly domestic married couple and Alex, Darwin, and Sean are Erik's nosy co-workers.

Impulse Decisions – listerinezero

Summary: Erik wakes up in Las Vegas with a hell of a hangover, a telepath in his bed, and a ring on his finger. Now what?

Fools Rush In – LoveSupreme

Summary: Erik owns a cafe on the edge of campus and accidentally starts maybe-stalking a Biology Professor there.

The Proper Care of Actors – afrocurl, Clear_Liqueur, Clocks, Etherei

Summary: Erik is an A-list action star who is notoriously difficult to work with, until the day he gets cast alongside Charles Xavier, rom-com darling who can charm the pants off movie audiences the world over and apparently even one Erik Lehnsherr. The paparazzi catch them out and about soon enough, and their real-life Hollywood movie romance becomes instant tabloid fodder.

In the Bleak Midwinter – keire_ke

Summary: It is not easy to find out, well into the second decade of the twenty-first century, that your mother arranged a marriage for you. It is even less easy to convince her that you have no interest in the very fertile Magda, she of the wide hips and lustrous auburn hair. Fortunately, with a good friend at his side over the holiday weekend, Erik is sure he will prevail.

Curve Fitting – kianspo

Summary: The weird thing is, Charles always introduces Raven as his sister, but he never calls Erik his brother. Erik would be bothered, except he prefers not to think of Charles as his brother, either. He can’t figure it out for four years, and then suddenly he can.

Or. A non-powered AU in which Sharon Xavier never remarries, and Charles 'adopts' not only Raven, but Erik too.

Right Person, Wrong Time – PoppyX

Summary: "TL;DR Charles is an insecure high school student who loses his virginity to the right person at the wrong time, and Erik makes it up to him in a romantic manner."

Favorite Mistake by endingthemes

Summary: Charles Xavier doesn’t think anything of it when he sneaks out without even saying goodbye to his latest one-night stand. What he doesn’t expect is to walk into his new position in the Xavier Industries marketing department and find that his latest hook-up is now his new boss.

I ♥ NY (It’s My Friends I’m Not Sure Of) by oddegg

Summary: For a 1stclass-kink meme promp: Erik is a single, successful man who likes quick sex with no strings attached. Then, he meets college professor Charles and it's love at first sight, at least for him. Charles, who heard of Erik's notorious ways, wants nothing to do with him besides being friends. Cue Erik bending over backwards to steal Charles' heart.

From Westminster With Love - thehoyden

Summary: NATO intelligence says there’s an omega-class telepath who sleeps under Westminster. Major Erik Lehnsherr is about to find out the truth for himself.

Accidentally Welcome to the Rest of Your Lives by kianspo

Summary: Non-powered college AU. Erik and Charles have nothing in common until they end up having sex at someone's party. They don't have much in common after that, either, but find each other a hard habit to quit.

irreconcilable differences (make for surprisingly good bedfellows) – pocky_slash

Summary: Tonight on The Evening Report with Malcolm Stevens, noted geneticist and mutant equality proponent Dr. Charles Xavier faces off with the infamous mutant rights activist Magneto in a live televised debate over the Genetic Nondiscrimination Act.

(At least, if they can stop flirting long enough to stay on topic.)

Mutually Beneficial Transaction – Pookaseraph

Summary: In his sophomore year at Columbia University, Erik, feeling slowly strangled by his mounting college debt, places an add on a sugar daddies website. He doesn't know exactly what to expect from it, but when he's contacted by a man named Charles who seems less creepy than the other people who have responded to his profile, he decides to give it a shot. Charles is nothing like what he expected, and Erik finds himself slowly falling in love with his sugar daddy while trying to find out exactly what caused this amazing guy to buy his emotional and sexual intimacy when he clearly deserves so much more than that.

Made To Be Broken - Yahtzee

Summary: Charles makes a New Year's Resolution: “No more straight men,” Charles repeated as he began scrolling through the apartment directory for Emma’s name. “No more futility. No more pointless hoping and heartbreak. In 2013, I never want to hear the words ‘exception,’ ‘experimenting’ or ‘phase.’ If, God forbid, I hear ‘bicurious’ even once, I may take a hostage.”

Then he goes into the party, and Erik is there.

Anarchy In The U.K. – Yahtzee

Summary: "Good God, Erik thought. The Prince of Wales is gay."

Charles lives in the unceasing glare of the public spotlight, yet keeps his sexual orientation a closely held secret, afraid he could lose his throne and force his deeply troubled younger sister into a role that would crush her. Erik, journalist and world traveler, has been a loner most of his life; he has little patience for closet cases. But a chance meeting in Kenya brings these two opposites together and sets in motion a love affair that will challenge the British monarchy -- and their most deeply held beliefs about who they are, and who they should be.

An Ideal Grace – afrocurl

Summary: Erik Lehnsherr is a visiting professor at Columbia University, as well as an acclaimed and award winning poet. Charles Xavier is a lead researcher with the Genetics Department who is well on his way to tenure. But what happens when Charles has to cancel a class because half his students abandon him in favour of a mysterious new English Lit professor? Naturally he ends up sitting in in the class, where Professor Lehnsherr mistakes him for a student. It's really too bad Erik has such a strict policy against dating students. It's also too bad Erik doesn't seem to know how to use Google.

An absence which could not be more there – aesc

Summary: He prepared to shift another half-step over to the Current Events section (which would, of course, enrage him) when the teaser positioned by the model's left elbow caught his eye: DATING WHILE TELEPATHIC: WHY I DON'T DO IT.

rooms/shares – pocky_slash

Summary: Erik is single, working a cube job he hates, letting his master's degree in mutant studies collect dust, and living on his best friend's couch. When she kicks him out, he's forced to trawl Craigslist for the least-offensive rooming option within his meagre budget. He never expects a response from the persnickety, high maintenance ad he replies to as a joke, but it's possible this too-nice apartment and mysteriously absent roommate might be the answer to all four of his problems.

Heli Cases –Black_Betty

Summary: "Heli Cases" is a program on PBS whose aim is to educate on the rapidly increasing occurrence of genetic mutation in the general populous by breaking the complex science down into palatable, easy to digest pieces.

It is also the only thing that helps Erik get his fussy daughter to fall asleep.

(Featuring Dadneto, baby Lorna and the struggles of single fatherhood, and Charles as the host of a late night show about genetics.)

Simple and Uncomplicated – Pookaseraph

Summary: Erik and Charles had been fuck buddies for some, but when Charles is in an accident he figured their relationship would be over. Erik's visit to his bedside in the hospital changes his assumptions even as he has trouble believing Erik is sincere.

Guilty by Association – Regann

Summary: While investigating the homicide of a John Doe who he suspects might've been murdered while working the streets as a prostitute, Detective Erik Lehnsherr finds an unexpected ally in a hooker named Charles who seems as determined as he to solve the case. As they become more deeply involved both with the case and each other, there's just one thing that Charles neglects to mention -- that he's really an investigative journalist, one quickly convinced that what they're dealing with is more than simple murder. cop!Erik, fake-hooker-slash-reporter!Charles, Modern AU.

This Is Not Comedy – baehj2915

Summary: Written for amarriageoftrueminds' prompt for a Cherik version of Louis CK's tangent about the fuckability of Ewan McGregor.

Naturally the similarities end there. I made this about Erik's full on public lust-filled gay revelation, and the chaos that spirals from there.

Politico – cygnaut

Summary: Modern Genosha Politics AU. In which Erik is l'enfant terrible of the mutant National Assembly, and his staff just wants to get him laid.

Conspiracy of Kisses –  Alaceron

Summary: Seven-year-old Erik needs to keep his telepathic best friend Charles from finding out that he wants to kiss him. But that's okay, because he has a plan - he'll put on a tinfoil hat.

The Pretender – Clocks

Summary: Charles is sick of having his best friend Erik drop to one knee and fake-propose to him in restaurants, just to score a free dessert. He doesn’t know which is worse: the complete embarrassment, or the likelihood that Erik doesn’t mean a word of it.

Bound – FuryRed

Summary: Is there anything worse than someone else’s wedding? Well, perhaps your sister’s wedding- where the groom just has to invite his boss and that man just happens to be your ex-boyfriend; a person you had an extremely passionate and tumultuous relationship with that ended badly.

Charles hadn’t seen Erik for a year by the time Raven had told him about the wedding. He wasn’t looking forward to the occasion, particularly when Raven explained that they would be celebrating the event with a two-week extravaganza at a luxury hotel, meaning that Charles would be forced to spend a whole fortnight with the man who he’d given everything to; the man who had ultimately broken his heart…

Lonesome On the Shelf – ikeracity

Summary: After three years of marriage, Charles has to admit that his relationship with Erik has significantly cooled off. These days, they're barely ever home at the same time and it seems like every conversation they have turns into an argument. Charles misses the way they used to be, misses the spontaneous dinner parties and the surprise morning sex and the wake up calls in the early mornings to catch the sunrise. But it's going to take two of them to fix this marriage, and some days, it seems as if all Erik wants is to be rid of him.

A fic about rekindling marriage.

Math Reasons – pearl_o, pocky_slash

Summary: "Mom says Erik always knows what he wants, it just sometimes takes him a little while to actually realize it," Ruth said.

Charles fell in love with Erik the first night they met, the first week of freshman year. Two years of friendship, adventures, arguments, hijinks, secrets, and summer visits later, Erik is starting to catch up.

Melted Ice Cream and Macaroni Art – pocky_slash

Summary: Everybody likes Charles. Nobody likes Erik. And that's really the source of Erik's doubts. Also, there's ice cream and a baby.

Watch Your Back – swoopswoop

Summary: Bodyguard AU where Erik is overly protective and things aren't as simple as they seem.

Dress Your Family in Plaid and Skinny Jeans – cygnaut

Summary: Erik and Charles meet at the mutant playgroup/parenting support circle and they instantly hit it off. And so do their kids, Lorna and David.

Continue firm and constant – aesc

Summary: Moira hasn't seen her old partner in saving the world from threats human and intergalactic, Erik Lehnsherr, for a few years. When she finally does see him again, she finds a man different from the one who's been with her down in the dark and the dirt and the blood... or maybe he isn't so different after all.

cradles you and connects you to everything – pocky_slash

Summary: Charles and Erik spend a chilly November afternoon in Manhattan doing not much at all. Also, there are cupcakes, chess, and Feelings.

[sweatersarecomfyy]

Salamander and the Fangirl (Newt Scamander x Reader)

Summary: Modern Hogwarts AU. Reader is bullied and Newt tries to stand up for her but then they both end up getting stuck in a broom closet together. Pre-established friendship.

Warnings: This is just a lot of corny fluff. Please excuse me. I’m a sucker for it.

A/N: This may or may not be trash but let me know. It was fun to write. Happy almost Christmas. Don’t forget your sweaters.

Word Count: 2,485

“Hey, hey you!” A mean voice shouted at me.

I sighed and kept walking.

“Mudblood. Listen to me.” It was behind me. The person it belonged to grabbed the strap of my shoulder bag and pulled it off.

“Give that back Geoffrey.” I reached out for my bag but the larger Slytherin boy held it just out of reach.

“Why? Can’t live without all your mudblood books, can you?” I tried to stop him from reaching into the bag, but someone came behind me and grabbed my arms, pinning them behind me.

I looked up and it was one of Geoffrey’s oafish friends. They all went around tormenting younger student’s for fun. This scuffle was attracting the attention of some of the students but unfortunately, they never got caught by the professors.

He reached into my bag and pulled out my journal and flipped through it.

“Stop it. That’s private.” I begged, tears in my eyes.

“That’s the point.” He laughed. “Would you rather me rip up this?” He pulled out one of my books, a muggle one, my adventure story.

“No. Just stop.”

He laughed. “Ooh, this is just too good.” A couple more of his cronies gathered around as he started to read out loud. “Today was really bad. Snape was horrid in potions even though I was really trying my hardest. People keep teasing me because I am muggle-born. I thought they would get used to it by the time I was in the 4th year. Anyway. I felt a lot better at the end of the day when I talked to Newt in the common room. He cheered me up and taught me some stuff he learned about dragons. I really like him, but I don’t think he likes me. After all he is a year above me.”

My face was turning red and all the kids standing around were laughing. I struggled to escape.

“That’s so embarrassing!” Geoffrey shouted. “The fangirl likes the salamander.”

I couldn’t see through all the tears in my eyes. “Just give it back. Let me go!” I shouted.

Someone broke through the circle of Slytherins. A tall, slender, red-head who was unmistakably Newt Scamander. He looked around at what was happening. His eyes landed on me for a second, and then observed Geoffrey who was holding my belongings. I felt my face growing even redder.

“What’s going on here, let her go.” He said softly to Geoffrey. “You have no right to look through someone’s belongings like that, or to touch her.”

He scoffed “Seems as if the salamander likes mudbloods too.” A flicker of confusion crossed Newt’s face. “What are you gonna do about it?”

I saw it before Newt did and I screamed “Newt, look out!” but it was too late, he too now had his arms pinned behind his back.

“How are you gonna protect her now?” Geoffrey got uncomfortably close to Newt, who surged forward, as if to try and attack him, only to be held back by the stronger Slytherin.

Everyone was laughing now. “Want a taste of the mud, salamander boy, ‘cause she sure wants a taste of you.” Geoffrey backed up and signaled to the two guys holding us. They pushed us around the corner and spotted a broom closet. He opened it up and the two shoved us inside. Geoffrey threw my bag and books in and then slammed the door behind us before we had time to react.

“Don’t bother with alohomora on this door, it doesn’t work.”

Newt banged his fist against the door. “Come on, let us out.”

Laughter filtered through the thick door. “Not a chance. We’ll give you plenty of private time to snog. We’ll be back, hmm, how about tomorrow?” More laughter.

“You’ll get caught!” I yelled.

“No, but maybe you will. Well, goodbye then.” Their laughter echoed on the stone as we heard their footsteps fading away.

I backed away from the door and sat on the floor against the wall, burying my face in my hands. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.” He sat down opposite me in the small closet. “It’s those idiots.”

“How much did you hear?” I asked peeking out.

“Erm. I heard you shouting when I came down the hall, so I went to see what was happening. I didn’t hear anything before that.”

I breathed out in relief. “Okay good.”

“But what do they mean that erm, you want to, to, taste…”

I buried my head again.

“Well, they were just teasing you, I guess.” He smiled briefly.

“Yeah, yeah. That they were.” I laughed.

“What happened? Why were they bullying you?” He asked, his eyebrows knitted together in a very adorable way.

“You know that I like to read muggle stories about magic, and that I’m not that good at magic. Geoffrey used to be my friend and I would tell him about the stories, and then he changed.” I shook my head. “It’s pathetic.”

“You’re not pathetic. He’s just confused that’s all. And for the record I think you’re brilliant.”

“Not brilliant enough to stop them from stealing my bag and reading my journal in front of the whole school.” I grimaced.

“So that’s what happened.”

“Yes.”

“That’s terrible.”

I didn’t know how much longer I would be able to keep my secret from him, especially because basically the whole school would know by now. “Erm, Newt?”

“Yeah?”

I pulled my schoolbag and books towards me and brushed the cover of my journal before slipping it back in my bag. “You should probably know what they read just so you don’t get a distorted view from other people.

“Oh um. Alright.” He turned a little red. “Is it about someone you fancy?”

I nodded.

“It’s ok. You don’t need to tell me if you don’t want to.” He looked away from me.

“I fancy you Newt, that’s what they read aloud.” I felt heat rising to my face. “I’m sorry. But you should hear it from me not others.”

He let out a breath that he seemed to have been holding in. “Oh good. I thought, I thought it would have been someone else.”

My eyes shot back to him. “What?”

“I fancy you too. I was really worried you would have said someone else. I mean why would you want to date a fifth year like me when you could have anyone else.”

I laughed. “Anyone else?”

“Well yeah, I mean, I’ve heard…well, no matter.” He blushed.

“I thought you wouldn’t want to date a fourth year.” I shifted my legs so that I could see his face better. “And what do you mean about what you’ve heard?”

“Just that there were other people who may have liked you. I heard Geoffrey liked you for instance.”

“Well he certainly has an odd way of showing it.”

He looked me in the eye. “You didn’t phrase it that way they said, with the erm ‘taste’ thing, did you? When you said that you liked me in your journal?”

I picked up on what he was talking about “Merlin, no. That was all them. All I said was that I liked you, but I didn’t think you liked me. Simply. Nothing about anything else.”

He smiled shyly. We looked at each-other and laughed.

“Are they really going to keep us here all night?” I asked.

“I guess it’s a good thing it’s Friday.” He looked through the cracks in the door. “It’s pretty late already. I guess we could do our homework.”

We got out our books and started, working together on some things. I knew Newt was bright, but he was absolutely brilliant, plus he had already gone through all my coursework and had great tips on how to do it. Due to the fact that we had nothing else to do we got through all of the next’s weeks homework in a couple of hours. We lit up our wands so that we could keep on working after the sun set.

“If you were my constant study-buddy, I would get much better grades.” I said as I wrote the last line to my potions essay.

He smiled over his book. “Ok then.”

I blushed. “You’ve really signed yourself up for something.” I warned.

“I don’t mind if you don’t. I quite like spending time with you.” It was his turn to blush.

“Alright then.” I held out my pinky.

He looked at it questioningly.

“It’s a muggle thing. A pinky promise.”

“What are we promising?” He asked.

“I guess it’s more like an agreement to be each-others study buddies.” I said, still holding out my pinky.

“Is this your way of asking me to be your, your boyfriend?”

I paused. “Do you want it to be?” I asked.

He lifted his hand and wrapped his pinky around mine. “Yes.” He smiled wider than I had ever seen.

I smiled too, and our hands broke apart.

He checked his watch. “We still have a lot of time till morning.” He looked at me with an awkward expression.

“I have a book. Do you want me to read it to you?”

“What is it about?” He asked.

“It’s called The Hobbit. It’s about a magical world. They have dragons and adventures and lots of other cool stuff. It’s also really well-written.”

“If it’s got dragons I will love it.”

“It doesn’t come in until later.” I said.

“Well then we’ll just have to keep reading together.”

I smiled and pulled the book out of my bag and started reading. I read just like I would with my little sister at home. I did all the voices and everything. Newt laughed with me when I did the lower voices of the dwarves. His eyes fixated on me and he was transfixed on the story. At one point I moved next to him so that he could hold his wand light up while I held the book.

I kept reading as I tentatively rested my head on his shoulder, seeing if he would react, if he would mind. His head leaned onto mine, so I figured he was alright with it. I kept reading for a while and then yawned.

“Are we going to stay up all night?” I asked. When there was no response I looked at his face, trying not to move, and saw that his eyes were closed. He had fallen asleep. I smiled to myself and closed my eyes, leaning into him more and falling asleep myself.

 A small flicker of light danced across my eyes and I blinked into the morning light streaming dustily into the closet. Newt was still asleep and was holding onto my arm.

I poked him in the shoulder. “Newt.” He didn’t wake. “NEWT.” He blinked his eyes.

“Morning.” He muttered. “We still here?”

“Yep.” I said.

He straightened up a bit more and didn’t even get embarrassed at the amount of physical contact. “What are we going to do when they find us?” He asked.

I thought for a second and then a smile broke across my face. “Do you want to do something that will really scare them?”

He looked at me blearily. “What do you have in mind?” He asked cautiously.

“It just something they do in muggle movies when they don’t want to actually show the two actors snogging. So, you know that they have kissed, but you haven’t actually seen it.”

He smiled cheekily “Sure, why not? Our reputations will be ruined anyways.”

“Alright. Untuck your shirt, and undo your tie, just a bit.” I reached into my bag to find my lipstick.

I looked up and he had done what I asked. I reached up and ruffled his hair so it stuck up in an odd way. His ears turned a bit red, but he was fine. I untucked my shirt too and then mussed up my own hair.

“What’s that?” He asked, pointing to the lipstick.

“Lipstick. I’m going to put it on your face to make it look like I’ve kissed you.”

“Oh.”

“Is that alright?”

“Yeah”

I knelt in front of him and put a good layer on my fingers. Then I pressed it to his face in several places, then rubbed it over. With any luck no one could tell the difference between real and fake lip-stick marks.

I stopped to look at my work. He looked like he had just been snogged alright. Frankly his hair looked adorable and his slight scruffiness made him all the more attractive. I caught myself looking into his eyes and blushed.

“I have a question.” He stated, looking back into my eyes.

I gulped. “Yeah?”

“Why didn’t we actually just kiss?”

“I erm, well, I’ve never…” I scratched my neck and looked down to the floor “I’ve never actually done it before.”

He slipped his hand under my chin and lifted my face towards him. I thought it was a pretty smooth move, especially for him, and then I saw how red his face was. It was taking all his courage at this point. My eyes widened, and he faltered.

“Well, I-If you don’t want to that’s fine. Ok.”

“You are my boyfriend…” I said smiling.

“But don’t feel pressured.” He said in panic.

I felt him about to move away so I leaned forward to where my lips were almost touching his. He closed the distance and pressed his lips firmly against mine. I closed my eyes and kissed back. I know I probably wasn’t too great at it, but I didn’t care because my whole being felt alive. I had heard a lot of people describe kissing, but this wasn’t quite like any of those descriptions, no matter how unexperienced I was with the whole thing.

There was a clanging at the door and we broke apart. I smiled at him and he was beaming back, although as usual, not making eye-contact. We heard mean laughter again and Geoffrey’s voice yelling something crude. The door swung open and Newt and I both blinked in the light, still facing each-other, and pretty close.

All the Slytherins’ mouths dropped open at our appearance and Geoffrey let out a weird kind of whine.

“But…” He said stupidly, standing there and blinking like a frog.

I grabbed my bag and swung it over my shoulder with Newt following suit, I stood up and took his hand, helping him up too. I marched out into the sunlight with my head held high and walked straight up to Geoffrey.

“What were you expecting? After all, I did want a taste of him.” I smirked around at the Slytherins and shoved past them, dragging Newt by the hand behind me. They gawked at us as we walked away. We got quite a few stares from others as well, but nothing beat the feeling of holding Newt’s hand as we walked along those corridors.

[rainy-days-comfort]

Abused by my first babysitter. When my mom found out and fired her to put me in daycare, she got a job at the daycare I went to. Distinct memories of her not letting me eat and her trying to convince my mom that she bruised me because I stole from a store. When I was 2.

Locked in a closet by my second babysitter's husband. Don't remember if it was a joke or if it was serious. Don't remember for how long. Just remember darkness and fear until he let me out. I remember going somewhere with them, and they put me in the back trunk space of the van with their kids all up in the seats, buckled and safe. I remember their two daughters holding me against the backyard tree and telling me that if I moved they'd hit me. I moved, they hit me. Told me if I could run around the swingset and back in 10 seconds they wouldn't hit me. I couldn't- they hit me. They made me swear or they would hit me, and then told their mom, who washed my mouth out with soap like this was A Christmas Story. But I always wanted to go and play with them, so nobody believed me. I thought that's how older kids played, and I just wanted to have friends. I remember being left outside on really hot days and not allowed to go inside because my babysitter was watching tv and I was too loud and distracting. To this day nobody believes me about that babysitter.

The neighbor's daughter ran me over with a barbie jeep on purpose once. Before my sister decided that she hated me, she chased her down the block to yell at her.

S was my friend. We were on again/off again best friends throughout elementary school. She bullied me relentlessly and mad everybody hate me because I smelled like pee all the time and was too fat to be cool. Every time I tried to stop being friends with her, our moms would call and decide that neither of us were innocent and that we had to stay friends. Every time I tried to retaliate or get away from her, I would get in trouble because I wasn't trying hard enough. She told everyone at school that I wet the bed. She told everyone at school that I was afraid of a preschool show. Neither of those were lies, but she told them what I'd confided in her. She was the first person to tell me to kill myself. She also introduced me to porn at her grandma's house. I was so uncomfortable and scared and not ready, or maybe already traumatized, that I locked myself in the bathroom. It was too late to ask to go home, so I hid in the room and cried until she went to bed.

My sister was supposed to be my friend. And she was, until I started showing symptoms of depression. I remember very clearly the day that she decided she hated me. All my life all I wanted to do was be like her, be cool enough to impress her. But I was just the annoying younger sibling who kept stealing her stuff. If I'd had the words to communicate why back then, I would have told her then that it was only because I loved her and I felt so far from the sister who was closest to my age, despite being 8 years older than me. I remember her banging on the bathroom door, telling me that I was the worst sister ever because I took one of her books. That she wished mom had stopped after having her. That was the first time I tried to kill myself. I couldn't deal with the thought of my biggest role model hating me so much. I sprayed my mom's favorite hairspray into the cap until there was liquid enough to drink, and I drank it. I didn't know what would happen, but I hoped that the chemicals would be enough to kill me. Turns out that I just got a little drunk and sticky and went back to bed after calling off from school. I have another vivid memory of when school got bad. When I wanted to die every day, plotted how to hurt myself while walking the halls... When I called my mom to pick me up. She couldn't get off work, so she sent my sister. I remember her looking at me and telling me to stop telling people when I want to hurt myself. That it was a burden on our mom and that she didn't deserve the pain that I was causing. When she planned her wedding she told me "Oh, I guess I have to invite you". At her bachelorette party she introduced me and our oldest sister as "This is my sister Amber, don't be mean to her or I'll beat you up. This is our youngest sister Megan, you can be mean to her, idc". On my sister's wedding day, I wasn't allowed to stay at the hotel with everyone else after the reception. I had to go to her house and watch her dogs. When she group called everyone with her ultrasound pictures, she left me out of it. I came into the room by chance, nobody told me. She told me that I'm the reason that she hates teenagers. To this day when she leaves she hugs everyone else goodbye but she just punches my arm.

My dad was supposed to love me. I remember him calling me fat and stupid every chance he got as a kid. He refused to lift me to put the star on top of the Christmas tree and made comments like "Well maybe if you stopped eating so many damn candy bars" to a 6 year old. "He was abusive to us," my sister's told me, "You got it easy because you were his kid. You were lucky.". I was lucky to be screamed at and hit in front of my friends. I was lucky to be forced to be berated and told to go away constantly. I was lucky to watch him beat the shit out of my dog and threaten me next. I was lucky to hear him scream at my mom. I was lucky. I was lucky. When my parents split I thought he'd want to see me more. He saw me once every three weeks. I vividly remember him telling me that he brought me food but I wasn't allowed to bring anything home for my mom because "She can starve to death for all I care". Once he got married how often we saw each other changed to once every month. He didn't even tell me that they were moving to Florida until they were pulling out of the driveway. He just left and didn't even say goodbye. He was supposed to bring me down to see him for my 21st birthday, but he didn't. He never sent me access the tickets, ignored my texts and calls about that, and ignored my texts and calls when my grandpa died. My grandpa, who had been my only father figure while he was out playing house with his new family. When confronted he said that I was "A grown ass woman" and didn't need him to hold my hand. I don't know why I expected anything more. I don't know why I hoped he would love me somehow.

I watched my grandpa die. Every day I watched him die. When we found out he had lung cancer and wouldn't be able to take care of my grandma anymore, I volunteered to quit my job and become their caregiver. My grandpa had always been my dad. He picked me up from school when things were rough and took me to get ice cream. He listened to my problems and offered advice and bad jokes to make me smile. He was always doing something, always trying to be helpful. He was the best man I ever knew, and I wanted to pay him back somehow. So I got certified to be a home health aide and I took care of him and my grandma. I took care of falls, accidents, long nights awake trying to convince him to go to the hospital because his oxygen level was dropping so much. He was stubborn. He was so sick, but he wanted to run church services anyway. He needed me to help with the audio because he knew nothing about it. So I was his caregiver, and his tech support. We spent hours working on church together. I hated it, but it was his passion so we did it together. I convinced him to go to the hospital in his last night home. I called 911 for the first time. I drove my grandma up to be with him. He called all of us up to the hospital so that he could say goodbye. I held his hand and sang his favorite hymn to him. I told him that heaven would be lucky to have him. I thanked him for putting the father in grandfather. I couldn't thank him enough for loving me and being what I never had. I still think about how I was the last to go in. How I joked "All these tears, you'd think someone's dying in here". I think about how every time we passed the funeral home he'd say "People are just dying to get in there, y'know", and that's the same funeral home we had his service at. I think about him hugging me when I was overwhelmed with caregiving and saying that he needed me. That was the only time I'd ever seen my grandpa cry. Losing him was the hardest thing I've ever gone through and I never let myself cry. I couldn't. I was the only one in the family who couldn't, because I wanted to stay strong for all of them. They needed a rock and I... Wanted to be that. Even still that pain sits with me. And listening to my aunt tell me the story of how she slit her wrists and sat in the bathtub, wondering why this had to happen. I was the confident. I was everyone's emotional dumping ground.

This... Isn't even half of what's on my mind. This is just the beginning.

[8emmy]

The Austen Experience

Chapter 3: “How quick come the reasons for approving what we like.”

Start from Chapter 1 Chapter 2 

Nesta sat on the stoop of her apartment staring out on to the road waiting to be picked up by Feyre and Rhys. Feyre had texted earlier saying that they were on their way from dads. Feyre was the only daughter that had yet moved from dad’s apartment. She wouldn’t leave him alone, she had to look out for him. Nesta hated that Feyre was so kind hearted, that she was willing to help their father after the amount of shit he pulled on his girls. The loan sharks banging at the apartment door in the middle of the night, hiding in mother’s armoire, snuggling close with her baby sisters to stop them from crying out and drawing their attention. Their father calling from a cell from the police station trying to get his daughters to post bail, he didn’t mean to get so drunk that night, he just lost a lot of money. “We’ll be eating cup-o-noodle for a while but once I get the money we’ll be eating lobster for every meal,” he used to promise as they dragged him to the pull out sofa. And yet Feyre stayed, she would say that he was getting better, better than last month when he spent some of Feyre’s hard earn money on a horse race, and lost it again. Feyre would take him to AA meetings hoping that getting him off the bottle might mean that Feyre wouldn’t have to sleep with her wallet under her pillow. But Nesta and Elaine saw what Feyre couldn’t, a man that was too far gone, he couldn’t be changed, not since mother's death. Nesta clicked her heels together as she checked her phone one more time to make sure that Feyre hadn't sent her anything else. Feyre didn't text her. With a sigh, Nesta went back to staring out at the road. Feyre had always been the one that did stuff, helped to make extra money that they would use for groceries and hide the extra change in their socks from their father. She would walk to school to save up her bus money, always the penny pincher, saving never spending. But Nesta did, she would use money as a way to get back from her father. She would steal Feyre’s money to buy new shoes, or a jacket, or a stupid piece of chocolate. Nesta was horrible as a child. Eleven and she were already stealing from family. She would only play with Elaine, never letting Feyre play with their dollar store Barbie dolls. It was hard to actually form a better relationship with Feyre, always so concerned that Feyre would never forgive the childhood bully Nesta was. But surprisingly Feyre did. She was more than happy to open her arms for Nesta, never made a complaint to have her call. Feyre and Elaine were quite similar there, that they could forgive, even Elaine forgave their father. But Nesta was her mother’s daughter, she held grudges like medals, even as old as they were.

“Nesta!” Feyre calls out. She was parked a few buildings down. Feyre got out of the car to wave Nesta down. Getting up Nesta swings her purse over her shoulder. She didn’t wear a smile as she walked to Feyre who had a large one. “See we made it two minutes earlier than we planned.” “Yeah, I was worried for a second that you forget where I lived.”  She gave her sister hug. “If you had it your way no one except Elaine would nowhere you lived,” Feyre says opening the door for Nesta to get in. “Hi Nesta, it’s nice of you to have invited me to brunch,” Rhys greeted as Nesta slid into the back. The car smells new, the leather seats were cool on her legs. “Yes, well we wouldn't want you to starve,” Nesta says coldly. She really didn’t want to like him, not until he actually proved to be a normal decent person, no use to getting attached to garbage. “No, no we wouldn’t.” Feyre slid into the front passenger seat. With seat belts buckled and greetings finished the three of them were off ready to do a bit of spying on the delivery boy. The cafe across from Sweet Stems was very industrial. The lights were, of course, Edison bulbs hung in geometric shape chandeliers, the tables were made from the tops of old shipping barrels and all the male baristas had Victorian mustaches. “I think we found the breeding grounds of the hipsters,” Rhys says looking around the place. Feyre lets out a little giggle. “Cauldron save us all,” Nesta whispers back, as she pretended to pray to the Cauldron. That made both Feyre and Rhys chuckle. After finding a table close to the window Rhys got up to buy the first round of coffees. “He seems nice,” Nesta says as the two sisters watch a brunet headed man help Elaine load up a truck full of large vases full of flowers. “Well, if Elaine likes him then he must be nice, or at least I would hope so.” “No, I’m talking about Rhys. He seems… sweet.” The word sweet tasted tart in her mouth. Feyre cheeks blushed, she looked behind her to Rhys still in line for coffee, he gives Feyre a little wave. “He is when he isn't being a jerk.” They go back into silence watching as the man takes the vase from Elaine with a large handsome smile. “He’s got a nice face,” Nesta says. “And a nice ass by the look of it,” Feyre adds. “Are you talking about mine? Because you can always test that theory, Feyre darling.” Rhys interrupts. Feyre’s blush deepens as Rhys gives her a wicked smile. Feyre waits till all the drinks are placed on the table before whacking his shoulder. “Not funny, we’re talking about him.” Feyre points to the man that had just disappeared into the truck. “It doesn’t help you when you’re pointing at my reflection, darling.” Nesta has to hide a snicker at Feyre’s face turning even more red than before. Rhys laugh was rich and deep, he takes a drink from his mug telling Feyre to do the same. He even had the balls to ask to take a sip from Feyre’s mug, and while he did he made sure to lick the rim. “Our first indirect kiss, and over a coffee date too.” “This is not a date, not with my sister watching your pathetic flirting skills.” Feyre huffed taking a napkin to get rid of Rhys’s saliva. “But you love it. Do let me remind you that you found my ass to be chiseled by great Italian artists,” his smirk could make most women blush but Feyre just rolled her eyes. “I have never said that your ass was ‘chiseled’ by Italian artists.” “But you just did.” Rhys shoulder gets another slap from an angry Feyre. Nesta really felt third wheeling with the two of them. The way they bantered like they’ve been friends for years, and the sexual tension was thicker than the concrete counters of the barista bar. Nesta went back to looking out the window. She gasps and points vigorously at the window. “They’re kissing! Elaine is kissing him! Isn’t that illegal?” Feyre looks out of the window with her own shock in horror. “I would think that there would be a law against bosses kissing their employees,” Feyre says not able to take her eyes off Elaine locking lips with the delivery boy. The two were partly hidden from the trunk of the truck. “If they're both legal adults there shouldn’t really be a problem,” Rhys chimes in. “But if they break up the guy could sue for sexual harassment or being treated differently because of the past relationship he had with Elaine. Elaine can't afford an account let alone a lawyer.” Feyre says watching as her sister steps away from her lover with a sweet smile. They close the trunk before going back into the shop. “We can't say anything,” Nesta says breaking her glance from the window to her mug. “Elaine would be so mad if we told her we saw her.” “Then what do you suppose we do then? Pretend that she hasn't made a stupid decision? That she won’t be screwed over once she fires the guy?” Feyre asks still looking out the window as if she could see into the shop herself. “Yes, we keep quiet. It’s her own grave she's digging, we are not going to help her get out of it. She’s an adult.” Nesta takes a deep sip from her mug. Rhys still hasn’t said anything. His eyes had been glued to the contents of his half finished coffee.   Nesta wakes up to the sound knocking at her door. Last night when she got home she remembered that she forget to pack pajamas and toiletries. After she went over everything in her bag she went back to reading before passing out over her covers. Nesta got upper bed wrapping a robe around her as she groggily opens the door with the chain still in place. A habit she picked up from her childhood of worrying about loan sharks storming in. Feyre was standing out in front of her door, she had a large portfolio bag swung over her shoulder and her cross body bag on the other. In one hand she held a drink tray with three coffees. “Give me a sec,” Nesta says as she closes the door to unchain the lock. She opens the door wide enough for Feyre and her bags to come in. “Hey, I thought if we were going to be up early I might as well get the caffeine.” Feyre walks further into the apartment, her eyes taking in the small room around her. There was no homey feeling in here except for the books. Everything was tidy except for the bed, and the only pictures in the place were a few, a painting that Feyre painted for Nesta last Christmas hung above the bed, it was an abstract piece of a penis. Nesta liked the colors and how you really couldn’t even make out the phallic from all the other strokes. The other pictures were of Nesta and her sisters, the one with mom, at every graduation that they had, but nothing with friends. Nesta moves past Feyre moving to her closet to pull out clothing. “I’m just going to take a shower. Make yourself comfortable, sorry about the mess.” Feyre sat on the red armchair next to the window. Nesta’s apartment was so cold, and lonely. Feyre places the drink tray on the desk taking her coffee and taking a sip. She watches her older sister grab clothing from her well-organized closet before heading to what Feyre presumed to be the bathroom. Feyre knew that her relationship with Nesta wasn’t the same like her two older sisters had. Feyre and Nesta fought and disagreed with the majority of Feyre’s life, never really getting along. It didn’t mean that they hated each other, they just weren’t best friends. Even sitting here knowing that Nesta had invited her to come in she felt like she was intruding. Her place in the apartment was not in the way of Nesta, Nesta said to make herself comfortable but Feyre felt that if she touched anything that perfection would be destroyed by a mere touch, that she would leave a trail of paint along the floor boards. Her apartment (dad’s apartment) was littered with knickknacks and dishes yet to be cleaned. Paintings and pictures hung on every wall like a makeshift art gallery. The pullout sofa was always pulled out with dad’s messy bedding or him just laying there watching tv. Her room that she used to share with her sisters, had a small twin sized bed in there now so she had more room to paint. Elaine had used the small balcony as a garden that was easy to tend to for Feyre. Their small bathroom was cramped with tons of different products. And here in Nesta’s, it felt like an Ikea showroom. With candles filling up the unusable fireplace that sat on the wall in front of the bed. Nesta comes out with her hair still wet and her clothes simple. Her face was glossy from skin care lotions. “I must have slept through my alarms,” Nesta says pulling out a pair of socks from another drawer inside her closet. “Well, kickboxing was cut short so I might have arrived a little earlier than what we planned.” Feyre watches Nesta. Her older sister had the perfect posture, her face sharp and breathtaking, it was almost sad that Nesta defensive nature curdled her personality. “Which one is mine?” Nesta walks to the desk pointing at the remaining to go cups. “Which ever, both you and Elaine like your coffee with eight sugars,” Feyre moved slightly to look out the window, “Hey, we’re okay?” Nesta’s face from the reflection looked taken a back before going back to aloof. “Yes, why wouldn’t we?” “I don’t know, you’re sometimes really hard to read.” “Are we okay?” Nesta’s voice was soft. Feyre looked at her with a small smile. “Of course we are.” Elaine arrived five minutes later. Luckily her coffee was still warm. Helping to put Feyre’s art supplies into the trunk of Elaine’s second hand 2006 Chevrolet Cobalt. Nesta sat up front with her duffle bag by her feet, Feyre squeezed into the back with her long legs squished to Nesta’s seat. Nesta kindly moved her chair up till her knees were close to the dashboard. “Thanks,” Feyre says pulling out her phone to text. Elaine starts up the car and they began the trek to Austenland, it was only an hour and a half out of the city. “Who are you texting?” Eliane asks Feyre, her eyes looking at the mirror to the back before backing to the road. “Mor, just texting her that we’re on our way. You’ll have to drop us at the guest parking area. No guests are allowed to the back entireness, breaks the illusion.” Feyre said while still texting. “Okay, might be easier than trying to find employee parking.” Austenland was on an estate, the gates the welcomed you in was a long driveway taking you up towards a beautiful Georgian estate. The sides of the roads were well trim trees separating the acres of the greenest grass. It felt as if you were stepping back into time other than the fact that they were driving in a car from 2006. “They must have built this house, Prythian doesn’t have any of these old manors from the 18th century,” Nesta says breathlessly. “No, it was built by a guy in the 18th century, his entire family has lived in that house. Last year it was passed down to the current owner that found that upkeep was expensive so they decided to create Austenland.” Feyre explained. “The guy who owns the place lives in the small house close to the stables, where some of the other employees live. It’s a bit easier to just live on the estate than trying to commute.” “They have horses?” Elaine asks excitedly. “Yeah.” Nesta’s stomach dropped, hopefully riding was optional. She was not a big fan of large beasts. They drive up to a fork in the road, a sign pointed both sides marking the right as the stable house and the left the manor. Feyre pointed that they had to go up to the manor and that there will be another fork for the parking lot. But Feyre told them to stop so she could grab her stuff and head down to the stables. “I need to sign in and get dressed.” She says. “Bye Elaine, I’ll text you once I get home. And Nesta see you around!” With a large smile and carrying her belongings, she waved off the car. The Parking lot was just a gravel patch of land where some cars were parked. There were a carriage and a man with a frilly hat waiting at the other end of the lot. He waved at them as they parked. Elaine followed Nesta up to the carriage. “Madame,” the man bows deeply at his hips, he stands up straight. “Are you Ms. Nesta Archeron?” “Yes,” Nesta replies. She looked the man up and down. He was dressed as a traditional coachman. His stockings were showing off his calfs and his shoes and little adornments of ribbons. “Madame may you follow me to the house.” He took Nesta’s bag to out in the carriage. Nesta turned to Elaine. “I guess this bye, I’ll talk to you once I get home. Maybe Feyre will send you a quick message from me.” Nesta tells her sister before hugging her. Elaine smiles widely. “Have fun, and don’t just read the entire time.” “I’ll try.” Nesta gets help getting into the carriage by the coachman. “We’ll be heading to the large house where you will be greeted by the Lady of the house and be told the rules before you will be dressed.” He tells her before closing the carriage door. Nesta waves to her sister as the horse carries her off onto another path.

[adrastiana]

More things that happened

Yes that's an Inland Empire reference. :P

So I've discovered that more stuff was stolen. Earlier in the month my room smelled like cigarettes and people who don't bathe regularly. So I think it may have been recent. I am very upset. I have to move soon and have no idea where I am going so I guess I have bigger fish to fry. But this just made it worse.

When I went into the back of the closet to gather the remainder of my games I noticed that the small plastic case I kept GBA games in had its lid ajar. You have to pull the handles up and click them to the lid to close it. So if someone was in a rust or couldn't figure it out then they would likely not do it right.

I checked and Breath of Fire 2, Shining Soul 2 and Harmony of Dissonance were all missing. I thought the two Castlevania games were together in a separate case that will hold one GB/GBC or two GBA games. But I guess not. I usually try to group things together. Anywaiz, I think one or two PS1 memory cards were taken as well. Because I am almost positive I had more left from the initial theft than I do now.

Also missing is Twilight Princess for Gamecube and Ys 1&2 for DS. I am devistated.

I also discovered that Phantasy Star Universe for PS2 is not in the case. I think it may have been in the PS2 and I was so upset at the time I didn't give it much thought. I thought that Resident Evil Outbreak was the last PS2 game I played. But thinking back I am pretty sure that it was PSU now.

I cannot find the Ratchet & Clank HD collection for PS3 either. I am wondering if the disc is in the system, which is hidden in a large box of Comcast equipment. I cannot find the sleeve for the game. It was a pack-in so it came in a sleeve and not a plastic case. I am hoping that it turns up. If not I think it is easily replaceable. Still pisses me off though. -_-

At least my Gamecube, 3DS, PSP and PS3 are untouched. Although I cannot find my PSP charger. I thought I hid it under some heavy clothes on top of a chair. But the PSP was under there in its case. So I don't think that it was there. Because I know they're dumb but not that dumb. Why would you take a random charger? The PSP charger is really weird looking too. Plus it's a cumbersome pain in the ass. To make it worse despite being official the plastic on the plug that goes into the console has started to degrade. It looks kind of nasty. Since my battery asplode from old age I need that charger to play. Hope I can find it.

And to make things even worse, I dug into my armoire to get out Wind Waker and discovered the game inside was Ocarina of time. Now I ave two. My sister claims she bought it back from some guy she wouldn't give me the name of. But I thought at the time the case was way too filthy so it definitely wasn't mine. It looked like years of grime and not just the grossness of some piece of reseller scum who is also a slob. So I can't even play Wind Waker. And I have an extra Ocarina of Time. I wish I had looked inside the case back in the summer. I wish I had confirmed. But I was just so mad that I hid it and that was that. I hid my Gamecube and PS3 away because I feared that they would also be taken. So I didn't play those systems at all since then and I just couldn't look at the remainder of my collection. It was just too painful. Same with my CDs and DVDs.

Speaking of CDs, I don't know if this happened in the summer when stuff was taken or what. But I was packing the sad remainder of my CD collection and noticed that Return Of The Killer A's (Anthrax) had a broken case. The bottom hinge was cracked off so the top just comes off now. I do no remember that being an issue before. And inside of the case was the software CD for my PC monitor.

WTF? o.O

I literally have no clue. No clue at all. By the way, the music CD is still inside. I think this was a mad scramble and errant discs were shoved into cases. I did not check many of my CD cases. It was just too much to gandle. I can't take any more of this.

There's also what I assume is a blank CDR in my cabinet under what was left of my CDs. Again no clue. I have not burned a CD in a very long time. But my sister's boyfriend burned TV shows all the time. Maybe he had the dumb idea to replace some of the music CDs with CDRs for weight or something. I don't know. It ain't my CD. And I can't really check it out right now to see if anything is on it.

I confronted my sister about all this and all I get is a nasty attitude. Is she still defending him? She claims they broke up permanantly. Sure Jan.

She claims no one messed with my CDs recently because no one wants CDs. Well someone sure as hell wanted them last summer. She says no one was in my room but I beg to differ. someone stole those games. Someone needed to get high.

The piece of human filth was begging his dad on the phone for money on multiple ocassions. I overheard everything. At one point his dad hung up on him. Mind you this is a guy in his 40s with no job who is able bodied. I think he got frustrated that his parents wouldn't give him anything so he went through my stuff when I wasn't home. Yeah I should have gotten a lock but I have a feeling that it would have been picked anyway. After all, that happened to my mom. Nothing keeps this loser out. He steals from his parents too. I have heard them yelling at him over the phone about missing valuables.

I think I mentioned before that the cops were not helpful at all. They would not grant a restraining order and told me that I didn't have proof that he stole from me and that my sister had the right to invite him over. They told me that I should move. Can you believe that? I pay all the damn bills and I am the one that needs to leave to resolve the issue? Give me a break.

My sister defended him and lied and took off when I called the police both times. She was protecting him when she should have been protecting me.

And now we have to leave by the 22nd. It is all her fault. She has no income and failed to obtain a social security card and birth certificate like she was supposed to. So she cannot even get benefits. I told her to apply for the SS card online. It is free and it comes pretty fast. She did nothing. She had a year to get it together. I could not pay the mortgage after our stepfather died. So it defaulted and went into foreclosure. Had she gotten an income and stopped freeloading we could have done something as I was in contact with the mortgage company and they were trying to work something out. But I still didn't have enough to pay it and the utilities and everything else. I had to go on food stamps. And as I was applying those creeps were in my room cleaning me out to buy drugs. And then they do it again when I am applying for utility assistance. Ungrateful scum.

They were mad and verbally abused me for not giving them $20 and tokens. My sister's boyfriend was yelling at me and calling me a bitch. In my own house. Once the authority figure had died everything went to hell and there was no one left to protect me or stand up for me. So a couple weeks after that episode the stealing began. And that was my summer. Full of bullying, verbal abuse and epic freeloading. And I should have left. But when you are being abused you don't exactly think straight all the time. I didn't want to burden people with my problems. I was afraid to ask for help. I was afraid if relatives found out what my sister had a hand in that they would cut her off from any sort of help and she would die somewhere

So now I have until Friday and have no idea what will happen. I guess I need a storage unit. I have packed a lot but ran out of boxes. No idea where I am going or what will happen. I do get some money out of this but have to split it with my sister who will likely buy cigarettes and other junk with her half like the irresponsible child that she is. I'd rent a room if I could afford it. But Philly is kinda high rent and I am currently in the Far Northeast. That is not a cheap area. My primary care doctor is here. I don't really want to leave the area. But it's not like I was originally from here. I used to want to go back to the old neighborhood. Not anymore.

I hope I don't end up homeless. I'm worried about my dog.

Whatever happens happens. I will just have to live through it. I am used to suffering through bad times. But this is the worst yet. My family was evicted when I was nine. But we got a place to rent. I am just ill prepared. I hope everything works out in some way. If I don't post for a long time then that means I am likely unable to. I guess that's life. That's just the way it is. Hopefully the "it is" won't be too bad.

Sorry about the length. I don't think you can read more cut on the app. If you can I can't find it. ><