#buckysbest

[buckysbest]

CHAPTER TWO: NO SHAME PAIRING: ex!Bucky barnes x reader Warnings: Swearing Series Summary: Bucky realizes one can only run from their problems for so long before they must returns home but he sure as hell wasn't expecting her to be there when he did. Word count: 1.2k A/N: This Series is based off the Album “Calm” by 5sos. If you want to follow along in the album, listen to No Shame while reading this!

Series masterlist // Masterlist Coming soon

New York provided no shade from the bright lights of fame despite your relocation from LA. Every time your foot exited your new apartment building in Manhattan, camera flashing swarmed your vision like bloodthirsty hornets. Equally unrelenting were the men holding them, often shouting crude and vicious rumors to get a reaction. It came with the life you were gifted. Being as close to Tony as you were, fame crept behind you constantly, hiding in the deep recesses of alleys and buildings you passed. It wasn't anything you chose, far from it actually. Somehow you went from humble uni student to famous confidant of Tony Stark. 

It is true he took you under his wing, but it wasn't your fault he viewed you as his own daughter. Yet despite this, you were the one who had to deal with the fallout of it. The paparazzi, the vicious fans, the lack of privacy. A bit of you reveled in it because occasionally, it was nice to be the center of attention. Occasionally. You were lucky that Tony set you up with a lovely PR team, predicting the outcome of the growing friendship between the two of you. This meant you were trained for these things. The paps, the interviews, the tours. It is what came with the life. At least that's what you kept repeating to yourself as you put on a brave face and walked through the crowd with a gracious confidence and a kind smile, surrounded by brute security who did not mirror your compassion for those around you. As soon as you collapsed in the car, the smile fell from your face faster than Icarus fell from the sky. Fittingly too. It wasn't too long ago you had true happiness. Being lifted from a less than glamorous life and shoved into the spotlight had its perks. Having a team with you wherever you went meant you were never hungry or worrying about paying rent or struggling to pay off student loans. But when you fly too close to the sun….

“Hey Max, would you mind turning on some music?” 

“Of course Miss. Y/N” His hand momentarily left the wheel to turn on the radio and returned just as quickly. Swells of some band you didn't quite know filled the all-to-empty compartment of a vehicle meant for 6. Opening your phone, you swiped through social media until you arrived at the compound. Max opening his front door triggered a fake smile upon your face as he wrapped around the car to let you out. Your hand was taken by Max and your Sophia Webster heel graced the pavement of the compound driveway as you exited the car, poise dripping from your every movement. This facade was dropped immediately when you entered the safety of the compound doors. Immediately taking off your heels, you quickly lost Max at the door and quickly moved to the safety of your room to avoid any unnecessary interactions. Collapsing into your prestigiously decorated room, you found a pair of leggings and a loose tank top to change into. You were home momentarily but you couldn't let that make you lazy and unpracticed according to the schedule your PR team sent you.

5:45am - Arrive at Compound

6:00am - Yoga in Training Studio

7:00am - Breakfast

7:25am - Meeting with Mr. Stark to Review notes 

8:45am - Nail fill

And the list droned on and on until too late in the evening for your taste. You groaned, grabbing your yoga mat at its designated corner and burying your head in your phone, looking for a playlist to suit your next hour.  Sliding in your headphones and clicking on the closet album, your bare feet quickly and quietly pattered down the hallway before you collided with someone significantly taller than you causing your phone and yoga mat to drop rather dramatically on the floor. Removing your ear buds, you froze reaching for your belongings as a laugh rang in your ears. “Here, let me help you wi-... Y/N?”His blue eyes pierced your heart as they met yours, at a distance too close for your liking. You could feel the color draining from your face like paint peeling from a wall. A wash of nausea hit you at full force, almost knocking you off your feet. Your eyes searched for an escape plan as time slowed around you and there it was in, its full body guard glory. 

“Max! I’m over here!” The suit-clad man popped his head out from the crowd of identically dressed cronies and a look of relief washed across his middle-aged face. He quickly rushed toward your position, parting Bucky from you like Moses had the red sea. The same relief grabbed hold of your face as his little squad surrounded you, escorting you to the studio.

“Miss. Y/N, You know you're not supposed to leave my sight! I’m supposed to make sure you stick to your schedule and you don't make it very easy” You pushed a chuckle from your lips as you peered over your shoulder to the super soldier frozen in the middle of the hallway. 

“If it was easy, everyone would do it Max,” you once again tried to play along, struggling to gain any sort of emotional footing under you.

                                                        •••

You could feel them looking at you despite you being the only one in the studio. The downside to the plan you had concocted was you couldn't escape the gaggle of security placed on you. It was infuriating that you were an adult and yet, you still found yourself surrounded by babysitters. To be fair, you weren’t known to handle stress very well and seeing he was back, you now understand why you had Max and his friends glued to your side this morning. 

You exited the studio a tad more relaxed than when you entered. Your shoulders dropped a bit lower and a small smile found itself upon your face. “Alright Max, whats next?” 

“Miss. Y/N, your breakfast has been prepared downstairs. You only have 25 min-”

“Max, I’ve told you… I can fend for myself ok?” you sighed, a small smile still on your face because you knew he was well-intentioned. You were welcomed to the sight of a large, hearty breakfast consisting of an assortment of organic and nutritious delights. While you would have rather sported a doughnut this morning, you were thankful you had people who cared for you this much. “Ok Max, I need you to get lost and let me enjoy myself while I’m home ok? I know it's your job so how about you walk me to where I’m supposed to be? Fair?”

“Miss. Y/N, You know I’m not supp-”

“Come onnnnn, Max! Please!” 

The exasperated whine apparently struck a chord on his heartstrings because he agreed to your terms if his team watched you on the cameras.You took your bowl full of fruit back to your room and collapsed on your wonderful, wonderful bed. Your phone vibrated in your pocket as you flipped on the tv.

Bucky: I didn't know you were going to be here...We should talk?

Your heart dropped into your stomach and even the small amount of fruit you consumed seemed to spoil in your stomach.

Well Fuck.

[barnesandco]

Ayesha’s 1k+ Writing Challenge!

Writing Challenge Submission Masterlist

Hey, everyone, I'm so happy to be back online - I think I was only gone for a week so that announcement was very extra of me - and to be introducing my first writing challenge! I'm so honored and flattered that so many people enjoy my work, and I'm incredibly grateful for your support since I joined this community. Tumblr is my greatest escape, and you've made it a very welcome and comforting one. 

A sense of community and friendship is particularly important in these trying times, and I extend my heartfelt prayers to everyone struggling right now. I'm here to listen if there's anything you need to say, and I'm sorry I can't do much more than be a metaphorical shoulder to cry on, and to offer this distraction as a brief reprieve from whatever you might be going through.

In order to present a gift of relief, and to share and create more stories of heroism - not that any of it can ever compare to the courage displayed by our health professionals and essential workers these days - and to honor and promote our collective of Marvel fanfic writers, I've decided to host a writing challenge. You don't have to follow me to participate - although that would be appreciated - you just need to follow the rules I've outlined under the cut. If you need clarification on anything, don't hesitate to ask! I hope you'll join, and I look forward to seeing what everyone comes up with. 

Rules:

Your fic can be about any character(s) from the Marvel Cinematic Universe. You can also include original characters that you create. If you want to write a romantic fic, I think it goes without saying that it shouldn't be underage (or having an excessive age gap), non/dub-con, incest, abuse, power imbalance/manipulation (e.g. employer x employee or teacher x student), etc. 

The sky’s the limit when it comes to the type or genre of the story, so let your imagination fly! You can write reader-inserts, pairings of pre-existing characters, OCs, or even just solo fics about the character you've chosen. I'm open to canon fics, AUs, fluff, smut, angst, romance, platonic fics, and whatever else you guys can dream up. (If you're writing smut, please let me know, as there are some additional guidelines I'm setting for that.) 

Word count is minimum 250 words, and anything above 500 words must have a keep reading tab. Multi-chapter fics will obviously be accepted - and with a lot of enthusiasm! - but please make a masterlist for any such series.

Kindly include any and all warnings that apply to your story.

The deadline for submission is the 31st of December, 2020.

Please tag me @barnesandco​ in the completed fic - and in every chapter of a series if you've chosen to write one - and also tag your work with #ayesha1kwritingchallenge. If I don't acknowledge that I’ve seen your work within a week of you posting it, please DM me.

One entry is allowed per participant, and you can send in an ask or a DM to participate, in which you should mention the one prompt you would like to use and for which character(s) from the list below.

Prompts

Dialogue Prompts:

"You fell asleep on me." --Taken by @lancsnerd

"Screw you." --Taken by @need-a-fugue

"I've got this." --Taken by @filia-sapientiae​

"I'd never forgive myself for it." --Taken by @oreostars​

"I trust you." --Taken by @readerandcinephileingeneral

"Oh, I'm so offended." --Taken by @iamthe-shadow-on-the-wall​

"Who, me? I would never." --Taken by @kaunis-sielu

"I don’t want to hate her/him/them." --Taken by @suz-123

"I can't explain it, but loving her is just… easy." --Taken by @littledarlinwrites

"You're my everything." --Taken by @chrisevansdaddycap​

"Leave me alone." --Taken by @constantaking​

"That's disgusting." --Taken by @ruffalomakesmyday​

"What on God's green earth was that for?" --Taken by @sweetwritesx​

"Is that a threat?" --Taken by @glxy-otter​

"Promise. Please just- promise me." --Taken by @blue-like-barnes​

"Oh, I could kiss you right now, you brilliant, brilliant woman/man/person!" --Taken by @megthemewlingquim

"You know that'll never work on me." --Taken by @allaboardthereadingrailroad​

"I'd let you if you asked." --Taken by @wordywarriorwrites

"___, I swear to God, if you do that again, I'll feed you to Tony's stupid robot." --Taken by @nekoannie-chan

"You can't do this." + "Then I'll die trying."

"You're stronger than anyone I've ever known." --Taken by @companionjones

"How did I get here?" --Taken by @thestorydetective​

"Why are you smiling this wide this early in the morning?" --Taken by @tinymalscoffee​

"What's the worst that could happen?" --Taken by @phant0m-queen​

"I can't believe they haven't caught us yet." --Taken by @indyluckycharlie​

Song Prompts:

Watermelon Sugar - Harry Styles --Taken by @softpeachbarnes​

Finally//Beautiful Stranger - Halsey --Taken by @shield-agent78​

To Build a Home - The Cinematic Orchestra --Taken by @whistlingwillows​

Floating - Alina Baraz ft. Khalid --Taken by @chuuulip​

Summertime - Ella Fitzgerald

Wind Beneath My Wings - Bette Midler

To Die For - Sam Smith --Taken by @hailhydra920​

I Scare Myself - Beth Crowley

Speechless - Dan + Shay --Taken by @captain-kelli​

Growing Pains - Alessia Cara

Levitating - Dua Lipa --Taken by @samingtonwilson​​

Ain't No Sunshine - Bill Withers --Taken by @mermaidxatxheart​

Human - Christina Perri

10 000 Hours - Ella Mai

Despacito - Luis Fonsi ft. Daddy Yankee

Let's Do It - Ella Fitzgerald --Taken by @smediumsmeatbae​

Honey - Raveena --Taken by @opalsandlace

Talk Too Much - COIN --Taken by @subtlebucky​

Put a Little Love on Me - Niall Horan --Taken by @buckysbest​

Thinking Out Loud - Ed Sheeran

Meet Me on the Battlefield - SVRCINA

Centuries - Fall Out Boy

Titanium - David Guetta ft. Sia

Stay - Rihanna ft. Mikky Ekko --Taken by @jalapenobarnes-main​

Eyes Open - Taylor Swift --Taken by @helahades​

One-Line Prompts:

Recovery is tender, straining yellow-blue over his/her/their shoulders and delicate in the shadow of his/her/their smile. --Taken by @iced-capsicle

Laughter tastes like cotton candy. --Taken by @rogersumbra

" All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players; they have their exits and their entrances; and one man in his time plays many parts, his acts being seven ages." -As You Like It, William Shakespeare --Taken by @shakespeareanqueer​

How do you miss something you never had? --Taken by @shellbilee​

They're stuck, and it's all ___'s fault. --Taken by @buckybarney​

Gabe Jones' French skills come to good use. --Taken by @raindroptv​

Self-discovery is a path nobody likes taking, but sometimes, there is no other choice.

"Demons run when a good man goes to war." - Doctor Who, Steven Moffat --Taken by @harley-sunday​

Star-crossed lovers find a galaxy to take refuge in from the rest of the universe. --Taken by @sgtjbuccky​

The Second Law of Thermodynamics states that everything goes from order to disorder. --Taken by @alyxkbrl​​

One-Word Prompts:

Sacrilege

Bibliophile --Taken by @nacho-bucky​

Soldier --Taken by @writing-mermaid​

Chrysanthemum(s)

Schadenfreude

Deja Vu

Picasso

Self-Partnered

Petrichor --Taken by @redhairedfeistynerd​​

Serendipity --Taken by @xoxoeeveewritez​​

Momentum

Equilibrium

Entropy

Resplendent

Anemone(s)

Effervescence

Sweetheart

Absolute

Echo --Taken by @wintersoeldiers​​

Nefarious

Picture prompts:

1. Taken by @infj-slytherclaw​

2. Taken by @starrysebastians​

3. 

4. 

5. Taken by @corneliabarnes​

6. 

7. Taken by @bucky-smiles​

8. Taken by @monarchofallisurvey​

9. 

Special thanks to the following authors, who not only inspired and initiated my desire to write, but then encouraged me, supported my work, and were - and still are - tremendously helpful. Others in the following list I befriended later on, and I'm so grateful that I did, because they've helped transform my experience on this site, too. Point is, all of these people are so kind and amazing and marvellous beyond what words can describe. Thank you:

@samingtonwilson @suz-123 @nacho-bucky @evanstarff @tropicalcap @kentuckybarnes @buckyreaderrecs @mermaidxatxheart @corneliabarnes @buckyland​ @bucky-smiles​ @sebbytrash​ @jalapenobarnes​

And thank you of course to my wonderful, magical followers who comment and reblog my stories, and give me all the praise I do not deserve. Thank you for your kindness and your enthusiasm - I cherish it and do everything I can to earn it. Special mentions:

@readerandcinephileingeneral​ @notsomellowmushroom​ @sonjashuterbugjohnson​ @anjali750​ @severelytinyeagle​ @redhairedfeistynerd​ @parmisaanowl @starnight-charmer​ @alyxkbrl​

I'd like to conclude by saying that I debated whether or not to host this writing challenge now, in a time like this. I decided to do so in the end because I need it. Call me selfish, but I need a reprieve. I need to feel like this disaster that has us surrounded right now isn't all there is to the world. And if I've learnt anything from being on this platform, it's that you're very rarely alone. So I hope that this activity can provide some semblance of hope for others that feel the way I do, and if not, then at least a little escape.

So my last but not least thank you goes to everyone who participates in this challenge and thereby makes this shelter from the world's storm, a little stronger, a little safer, and a little warmer. 

I’m excited to see what everyone comes up with, and I look forward to making some new friends. Thank you all and good luck!

[buckysbest]

CHAPTER THREE: OLD ME PAIRING: ex!Bucky barnes x reader WARNINGS: swearing SERIES SUMMARY: Bucky realizes one can only run from their problems for so long before they must returns home but he sure as hell wasn’t expecting her to be there when he did. WORD COUNT: 1k A/N: this series is based off the album “calm” by 5sos. if you want to follow along in the album, listen to old me while reading this! This chapter was hard af to write so forgive me if its not my best!

series masterlist // masterlist 

“Here, let me help you wi-... Y/N?”

Her face dropped immediately and fear momentarily took hold of her once bright eyes. 

“Max! I’m over here!” Her obvious cry for help left him speechless. He had been thinking about the possibility of running into her but that was not the reaction he expected to face when he came toe to toe with his past. The gaggle of suited men pushed past him, engulfing her in a sea of black ties, leaving him cast away and alone in the middle of the hallway.  He tried to catch another sight of the girl he once knew but she was completely buried. A chill ran down his spine before he knocked a little sense into himself, regaining his composure and picking his jaw up from the floor. His thoughts ran untamed through his mind for the first time in a long time and he hated it. He wondered why the girl he had seen just then didn't look like the girl he regularly kept tabs on in the papers, what she was doing here, and if she was wondering about him.

His mind had put on autopilot and before he could realize where he was going, he soon found himself in his own bedroom for the second time today. He shook off the thoughts and he found a seat at his desk, his eyes training on the old photos that lined the surface. A small laugh of content filled the room around him as he examined the first framed picture on the sandalwood tabletop. He remembered that day like it was yesterday. Bucky's arm was wrapped around Steve as they entered the dance hall and the night ended with him taking home a girl named Sophia, Steve being left to deal with her very unhappy sister.

The photo next to it was him and Nat at her birthday party from 4 years ago. This time he left with a different girl who was better than any girl he had met in the years prior. Her smile filled up a room with rays of sunshine and when she entered a room, awe grasped those around her. Often, those who witnessed her continued to watch her through the night, desperate for another dose of her beauty. He remembered the warmth that engulfed him when he was with her which is why his heart broke at her coldness earlier today. Was it his doing? It had to be.

As guilt crawled up his back, he pulled out his cell phone and typed out a message.

Bucky: I didn't know you were going to be here...We should talk?

 Almost instantly after he sent it, those three dots appeared.

Y/n: Sorry for my reaction earlier, you just surprised me that's all! 

Upon receiving the response, he released a breath he didn't realize he was holding. 

Bucky:  oh ok… I just wanted to make sure you were ok.

Y/N: yup all good, I have to go, i'm on quite the schedule. We’ll talk later.

His heart raised a bit, noting her shift in mood a little. It wasn't too long ago that they sat in the courtyard and talked for hours under the stars. His phone vibrated, this time at the fault of his best friend. 

Steve: Hey, We are about to have a meeting for the upcoming week, why don't you come and join us? We are meeting in the Coulson wing conference hall 

A lighthearted chuckle left his lips as he confirmed his attendance and got dressed into something a bit more socially acceptable for a meeting. Upon entering the conference room, he was immediately engulfed in a hug by Wanda. 

“Hey Tin Man! We missed you!” She smiled, pulling him into a seat next to hers. “You’ll have to tell us everything! You’ve been living in France? Or was it Italy? What have you been doing over there? What's the weather like?” 

The warm smile was reflected on his face as well as he caught up with the old friend waiting for Tony. 

Walking in fashionably late as always, he was trailed by a shadow in the shape of Y/N. Her hair, nails, and outfit were perfectly styled as always and she held a glow to her persona. This was the girl he recognized from the papers. 

“Hey everybody, thanks for taking some time out of your busy days. Today isss.. uhhh…”

“It's Thursday Tony” y/n chirped in before returning to her phone.

“Yes! Right! Tomorrow, Friday evening, we will be having a welcome banquet to properly kick off the festivities and I expect everyone to be in their best wear. The new recruits will be there and it will be a great chance to get a feeling for them and who meshes well with the team. Saturday will be the trainees attempting to conquer the course outback, Sunday will be interrogation techniques, and finally Sunday we will have our sparring matches. Score cards will be attached to the email Pepper’s gonna send out along with agent assignments. Does anyone have any questions?” 

The room remained quiet as Tony scanned the room. “Great, everyone have a great day and, uh, welcome back barnes”  he smiled. 

Y/N was the first out of the room and as the rest filtered out behind her, Steve approached Bucky pulling him into his side.

“Wanna go touch up on your sparring technique so a recruit doesn’t embarrass you?” Steve quipped eliciting a scoff from Bucky.

“If you don't mind losing, I’ll spar” he laughed back, shoving his shoulder.

As they were heading to the gym, one of the guards approached and stopped them in their tracks. “Mr. Barnes? You have a visitor.”

A confused furrow caught the faces of the dynamic duo as they changed course and headed toward the entrance. 

“Bucky!” a squeal filled the opening chamber of the compound and a small brunette jumped into the very unsuspecting Barnes. 

“Camila?”

[buckysbest]

CHAPTER TWO: NOT TODAY PAIRING: best friend!peter parker x reader Warnings: swearing, heartbreak, slow burn, mental health struggles? Series Summary: peter parker is about to embark in the next chapter in his life with his best friends by his side. a secret relationship, a heartbroken girl, and the pains of growing might be strong enough to pry these friends apart. Word Count: 1k A/N: this series is based off the album “the pains of growing” by alessia cara! if you want to follow along, you can listen to Not Today (track two on the album)! i hope you like the new story! Tags: @eridanuswave

series masterlist // masterlist

Lifting boxes all day was a surefire way to exhaust yourself, or at least that's what you thought. Despite your aching limbs and your heavy eyes, the anxiety that ran rapidly through your mind was merciless. Rolling onto your side again, you searched for any sort of comfort by curling under your blankets before throwing them off in frustration with a whine. Sitting up, you swung your legs over the side of the bed and slouched over, allowing your head to fall heavy in your hands before rising sloppily to your feet. You shuffled your way into the now unoccupied living room and plopped down onto the couch, throwing on the tv and scrolling through channels (at a low volume of course). After landing on a rerun of some Nick-at-night original, you got up once more to make some tea, thinking it would calm your nerves. A cup and a half later, you were disappointed to see that you were wrong in your hypothesis. You scrolled through twitter, begging for some sort of distraction from the misfortunate event you replayed endlessly in your head. You suddenly jumped as you heard a sneeze from behind you.

A very tired Peter Parker wandered into the living room, sliding the back of his hands across his eyes sleepily. “Y/N?” 

Your eyes grew slightly wider as your face dropped a little, “O-oh Peter, I didn't wake you did I? I am so so-”

 A small chuckle interrupted you, “No, no, your good” He made his way around the couch and plopped down next to you. “So what are we watching?”

“Nothing, I just couldn't sleep,” you half-smiled at him, flipping off the tv in the process. “I’ll just head back up to my room”

His hand caught your arm before you could escape to your room and he pulled you back down. “Alright Y/N, spill it. You’ve been acting weird all summer… I’m really worried about you.” His troubled eyes scanned across yours, waiting for a response like it was the winning lotto numbers.

“Peter, really it's nothing. Just going through it right now that's all,” you sighed as you leaned back into the corner of the couch and pulled yourself into a ball.

“Well then let's go through it together,” he assured, resting his hand on your knee. “I insist…”

“I-I don’t know Peter… I guess I’m having a really hard time just dealing with.. Uh..” you trailed off, thinking of an excuse. “It's just hard not having MJ not being here with us! It's hard to be the only girl in the house without a little back up, you know!” you chuckled, reading his face in an attempt to see if he was buying your excuses. 

“I know exactly what you mean… I miss someone a lot right now to… “ his head hung a little lower and your heart sunk as soon as he referenced who you could only assume is Liz. “Her smile and her laugh would brighten up a room…” he lost himself in the moment briefly before returning, “b-but you wouldn't know her… I mean you would know her just..I-i mean unless you had a yearbook i don't think you recognize her” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. You recognized a white lie when you heard one, especially because moments earlier you were dealing them out too. “Anyway what I’m trying to say is sleep will come, I promise… and until it does,” he smiled, reaching for the remote and flipping on his favorite Netflix special before pulling you into his arms, “I’m here for you.” Your head sunk into his chest as he pulled a blanket over you and got he comfortable himself. 

You smiled up at him as he turned on the subtitles “Thank you Pete… Really..”

“Of course Y/N… It's what best friends are for.” It wasn't long before the soothing brush of his fingers along your arm lulled you into the sleep you had been longing for. 

As clouded vision came to your eyes, blink after blink, you started gathering the surroundings around you. Music was playing in the kitchen and sunlight beamed in through every window in the house. Groggily gaining some bearings, your feet dragged your body slowly into the kitchen where Ned and Peter were trying to cook what appeared to be pasta? 

“Morning Sunshine,” Peter smiled, popping a noodle into his mouth. “We’re almost done with lunch if you cared to join us” he smiled.

“Lunch?”

 Ned laughed as you poured yourself a glass of water and took your vitamins. “Yeah sunshine, it's almost 2:30. You must have been tired.”

“Yeah something’ like that” you muttered as a small smile came to your face. Stretching out your cramped limps, you walked a little more consciously up to your room. A blush took hold of your cheeks as you spotted the blankets on the floor, reminding you of how you found your first bit of sleep in months. Deciding to throw your hair up into a bun and wear an old t-shirt from your collection, you figured you should at least dress up a little. After throwing on your favorite jeans and a necklace Aunt May got you for your 16th birthday, you went back downstairs looking a bit more put together than your previous zombie-state. You stomach grumbled in agreement as you sat down at your new dinner table with your new roommates. It felt good to have great food in front of you and great people around you. As Peter and Ned spelled out their day, they caught you up on the episode of the bachelor they watched together and told you about Peter spilling the first can of tomato sauce. Within this conversation, a laugh left your mouth for what seemed like the first time in months. You found a small beacon of hope that your life might return to how it was, you could forget what you had seen almost a month before and go back to being hopelessly in love with your best friend without a care in the world. You began adding a few more noodles to your fork as the doorbell rang.

“Oh yeah, I invited a few guests over” Ned giggled mischievously, running over to the door and letting the guests in, housewarming gifts in hand.

“Surprise!!”

You and Peter both had the same shock in your voice as you simultaneously gasped, “Liz?”

[buckysbest]

CHAPTER SIX: WILDFLOWER Paring: ex!Bucky barnes x reader Warnings: swearing, cheating, almost smutty near the end if you squint Series Summary: Bucky realizes one can only run from their problems for so long before they must returns home but he sure as hell wasn’t expecting her to be there when he did. Word Count: 2.6k A/N: this series is based off the album “calm” by 5sos. if you want to follow along in the album, listen to Wildflower while reading this! thanks for supporting the series! i really love you guys! let me know what you think of the series!

series masterlist // masterlist

The blush that sat on your face sank deep into your skin as you lost your color. Bucky took note of your sudden change and concern captained his face. “Y/N… you ok?”

“Bucky...Y-you lied to me?”

“Y/N, what are yo-”

“You lied to me about last night Buck,” you sighed, hiding your face into your nervous hands. His head grew heavy with responsibility as it dropped with an exhale before he placed his hand on your knee and gathered your attention.

“I’m sorry Y/N, I should have said something. I just figured since you didn't remember it, well”, his hand momentarily left your leg as he ran it across the back of his neck. “I just figured that you didn't want to…”

 Before you could start, he quickly continued. “Look at me,” Following his queue, your silent eyes lifted to meet his. “I don’t know what you remember, but I was absolutely sober. I meant every word that left my lips even if you didn’t. That being said, we just fell into a little bit of normalcy and I really don't want to lose that Y/N.” He searched your face anxiously for a response.

You looked down at your newly tied sneakers with a small grin. “I forgive you bucky, but I need you t-” 

Fury’s sharp voice interrupted yours as it rang over the PA system on the course, “All recruits and essential personnel need to hurry their asses up into this building, we have reports of a storm coming our way and it does not look pretty.”

Other agents holding clipboards began walking faster as they made their way inside, encouraging you and Bucky to do the same. As you got into the building, even more agents filtered through you.

 “Hey, Steve’s on his way over... look, why don’t I meet you after we all get settled and have dinner?  Like 7ish?” he smiled.

You smiled back as you tried to control the butterflies that took over your stomach. “Y-yeah, sounds good.” He was quickly swept away by the blonde super soldier who was walking towards the conference room at a timely pace. You headed toward Tony’s office, taking a minute to process the events of the last hour or so. You had managed to lose yourself, replaying the dream-like encounter in your mind on loop, before reaching your destination. You shook the feeling off and allowed your knuckles to rap gently on the door's glass surface as Tony opened the door at the same time, almost trampling you in the process.

“Yea- wait no. just hold that till i get there. I’ll be- oh hey Y/N! Greg, give me a second, I’m on my way to the conference room now” he said before flipping his earpiece off. “Here to accompany me to the training briefing?” he laughed.

“Actually, I just wanted to hand off my paperwork. I need to help Pepper with the schedule for tomorrow,” you smiled warmly before grabbing the top few pages from your clipboard and extending them toward him.

“Oh right! Have fun and tell Mrs. Potts, she looks fabulous for me,” he smirked, taking the clipboard from your hands. You let a chuckle fall from your mouth as you passed him, heading towards Pepper’s office, only a few strides away. 

Again, you found your knuckles knocking on a glass door as Pepper invited you in. “Y/N! It’s great to see you! Whatcha got for me?”

You handed her your clipboard and the remaining papers on it, “I made a list of possible sparring partners with the assistance of Sergeant Barnes during the evaluation which include estimated time based on skill level. It’s a rough outline and doesn’t include instruction time but it's a start” you smiled.

“God, you are the best!” she groaned in relief, flipping through the pages of your detailed work. “Way smarter than any of the other meatheads conducting evaluation,” she laughed before placing the clipboard on the desk and grabbing another. “I managed to get a lot done during the course training so I really don’t need much else. Could you just put this on Tony’s desk when you pass his office?”

You nodded, grabbing the new paper work before pausing, “Oh! Also Tony told me to let you know how fabulous you look,” you giggled, exiting the room and dropping the papers on Tony’s desk next door. After leaving a note that it was from Pepper, you glanced down at your watch and smiled at the timely end to your day.

You found yourself leisurely wandering to your room, dropping your work of the day at the door then closing it behind you when you finally arrived. Your hands found the wooden knobs of your dresser, pulling it open then sorting through your neatly folded pajamas in an attempt to finally get comfortable. Landing on the black t-shirt that your hands now rested on, you slid off your tight leggings and revealing sweatshirt, throwing on the oversized garment in their place. You asked Friday to play some background music as you grabbed a book off the shelf that sat next to your bed before finding a seat on the long gray couch that adorned your back wall. 

Lost in the annotated pages of your favorite novel, the rain that thumped on your window added to the wonderful soundtrack your room emitted as you began to sink back into the familiar life you held here before you left. The time had escaped your mind until a soft knock thumped at your door. Your heart picked up drastically as you glanced at your watch again, this time denoting 7:00. He was punctual if nothing else.

You opened the door gently and welcomed the tall brunette in with a small nod, “Sergeant..” you giggled. 

“Ma’m” he laughed back with a small bow before making his way into your room and  reclining across your previously occupied couch. His eyes glanced over your bare legs drawing a light blush to your cheeks as you sat next to him, curling up into the corner of the gray loveseat. The comfort you had earlier in the day decreased at the lack of people around you as he started, “So you were saying something earlier.. You wanted something?”

The smile on his face infected your heart with warmth causing your body to shiver. “Y-yeah… I just wanted to know what happened last night… I mean I know what happened but I also, uh, well don’t and I know you would have never done a-anything like that but uhm..” you chuckled nervously, letting the hands that were on your knees fall down your smooth legs in an attempt to find any comfort hidden in this situation. 

His hand met yours as he assured, “Nothing happened, I promise. There were some heated words exchanged and, uhm” he cleared his throat before you cut him off with a chuckle. 

“No Buck, I-I know... “ you pointed to the now poorly covered hickey, letting your eyes fall to the ground with a small smile on your face. “I just wanted to make sure that I wasn't missing anything crucial.”

“Of course…” he said with a smile, standing up and offering you a hand. You grabbed his hand and he gently pulled you up from your seat, bringing your faces a little too close for your comfort.

“Nothing more happened than a mistake. I-I’m sure it won’t happen again” you mumbled, quickly becoming consumed in his eyes.

A cheeky grin danced onto his face as the gap between you seemed to be closing at an alarming rate. “Yeah, I’m sure.”

As you held the distance, centimeters from his face, you quickly cracked under the heavy blush that sat on your cheeks and stepped back in a sheepish manor, quickly dropping his hand and opening the door.

“Sargent,” you nodded, this time your eyes not leaving the floor.

“Ma’m.” A blush found itself on his smiling cheeks before he finally exited the room.

As you closed the door, you sank to the floor, holding your hands to your wildly beating heart.

You were made.

                                                               •••

The night passed quickly and it wasn't long before you found yourself in the gymnasium of the training hall, present for the next phase of recruitment week. The groups were divided by skill level and prospects were matched by Pepper using your scouting report. 

Director Fury led the mornings commencements, taking his rightful place upon the platform at the front of the room. “Ok listen up. We are going to start dividing into groups, pay attention and follow orders or consider yourself cut. Howell, Barker, Morton, Hale, Preston. You have been assigned to Agents Romanoff and Barton, please follow your evaluator, Agent Rooney to the training room. Cole, Duran, Gonzales, Sims, Fields. You have been assigned to Agents Rogers and Barnes, please follow your evaluator Miss. Y/L”

As continued to give instructions, you raised your arm with a smile and waved, gathering the attention of the prospects who swiftly found their spots in front of you. Turning around, you began reading off the script while leading them out of the main gym. 

“All right recruits, if you would follow me this way I will be taking you to an offshoot of the training facility. These rooms will be occupied by you and your instructors while I observe your progress and take notes on your performance. You will each battle in hand to hand combat and receive basic corrections from your instructors. This test is about strength and coordination just as much as your ability to receive criticism and be coached,” you paused, stopping in front of a black door. “This is where you will enter momentarily. In the event of an emergency, we will make a right here to return to the hallway we just came from, then another right to return to the main gym. When we enter, you will find a seat against the back wall and your instructors will be in to meet you briefly. Does anybody have any questions?” The small group all shook their heads in response. “Great, good luck!” you smiled, opening the door and letting them inside. Black walls encased the small room and the only illumination was found hanging above the giant white circle that laid upon the center of the black mats. You peeled off through the other door lining the walls and were greeted by two smiling faces upon entering.

“Did you scare ‘em?” Steve laughed as he and Bucky passed you.

You winked before giggling,“Only a little.” 

The boys entered the room, giving a very similar speech to you before calling up the first match. You watched through the one way mirror as Daniel Cole, a tall brunette built like a steam roller and Alexa Gonzales, a small brunette with an athletic build, took their places on the edge of the circle. They quickly entangled themselves, Alexa mercilessly placing hits on him with her unbelievable agility until she found herself suddenly pinned under the much bigger Daniel. 

“That was a really great job Alexa. You had him on the ropes but he managed to grab your arm. Can anybody tell me what shifted the momentum here?” Steve paused. Met with silence he continued, “With you being so much smaller than him, you can't do the normal reversal here which leaves you open to the arm bar he caught you in. Uh, let me- Y/N? Can you come here for a second?” Steve called through the glass. You tried to call back, quickly remembering the room was he couldn't hear you through the soundproof walls. You got up quickly and peaked your head through the door. 

“How can I help?” you offered with a smile.

“Can you demo an arm bar reversal on Bucky for them step by step I can walk them through it?” 

You nodded as you laid down on the mat, allowing Bucky to lock you in the arm bar and Steve to begin. “So with his legs significantly longer than her arms, she can't reconnect her hands to pull herself up,” he paused prompting you to move into your next  position. “Instead, she bridges her shoulders off the ground and rotates, pulling herself under his leg then up and over as opposed to..” his words quickly faded away as you laid on top of Bucky. You could feel his heavy breath on your neck as you held the position, desperate for Steve to say break. As if he could read your mind he speech quickly stopped causing you to jump to your feet and offer a hand to Bucky, eventually pulling him up.

 You disappeared back into the eval room more breathless and red in the face then you’d like to admit. As they continued their instruction, you found it harder and harder to maintain your composure with Bucky demonstrating throw after throw. It drove you mad watching him do what he does best and your close contact didn't help your growing want for him. As Steve handed out correction after correction, Bucky became quieter, eventually pulling Steve in and mumbling something in his ear. Steve nodded with a smile before Bucky began walking towards your door.

He slipped into the room and gently closed the door behind him. 

“Hey, do you need any help with eval?” Walking behind you, he peeked over your shoulder to read your notes and his closeness burned through your hold body. 

Without thinking, you turned your head and connected your lips to his. He quickly broke the kiss, shock written on his face through his raised eyebrows and slightly agape mouth. 

You braced yourself for the cold rejection you knew too well but much to your surprise, he pulled you up, connecting your lips again. His hands slammed roughly into your hips as he lifted you up prompting you to wrap your legs around his waist. He carried you towards the door, flipping the lock before practically slamming your back into the dark wall behind you. Your teeth caught his bottom lip, drawing a groan from his slightly swollen lips, before breaking quickly to pull off your shirts. He released a quiet needy whine at the absence of your lips but was muted by them smashing into his again. Your hands ran down his chest as he put your feet on the ground and trapped your body against the wall with his large arms, opting to continue his kisses down the side of your neck. His hands ran the sides of your body feverishly, reacquainting him with the details that he had desperately tried to forget over the past year and a half. Your lips then connected with his neck, reliving memories of your own as you gently began to gently suck and nibble at his sweet spot, being careful not to leave a hickey.  

“God, you are the only one who fucking does that right,” he groaned before your lips met again. His hands slid down your waist and on to your ass as he squeezed hard enough for you to know there would be a bruise in the morning. He then moved his kiss down to your collarbone and gently bit down. Your hand found his shoulder as you lightly pushed him back, leaning for a last kiss before breaking all contact between you.

“You don’t get to leave marks if I can’t Buck....” you said softly, scooting under his arm and throwing your t-shirt back on. You tossed him his shirt next and as he slid it on over his confused face you unlocked the door, propping it open slightly. You grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the door before, your hand found his now clothed chest. 

You pressed up onto your tippy toes to reach his ear, “I can't be a side piece Sarge and you know that. If you decide to end it with the girlfriend, then you can mark me up. Any way you want,” you whispered before fixing his disheveled hair and fully opening the door.

[buckysbest]

CHAPTER ONE: CANT CHEAT DEATH paring: steve rogers x reader warnings: descriptions of panic attacks, implied drug abuse, gun descriptions, mentions of blood series summary: after the death of his girlfriend, americas golden boy began hunting and murdering those responsible for her death but when universes collide, he is forced to come face to face with the ghosts of his past. word count: <1k a/n: happy monday everybody! this is a new series and its going to be about five parts (maybe?) so shorter than my other ones so far and I am open to suggestions on endings! Let me know what you guys think of the new series and if you want more! This series is heavily inspired by the song “Can’t Cheat Death” by the Ballroom Thieves so you can give it a listen if you want!

It had been exactly 7 months since he took to the streets with a thirst for blood exhibited by no other. Anger crawled through his veins and boiled the compassion that lay dormant in his body, cleansing him of any mercy he might bestow upon those unfortunate enough to be caught on his warpath. The carnage he inflicted was cold, still, and crafted with such skill he was deemed the expert of annihilation. He traveled throughout the county leaving a crimson river of blood flowing behind him from each stop he arrived at. Dingy motels and truck stops had been his home since she was stolen from him. 

He arrived in the room he would temporarily call home, dropping his only bag at the foot of the bed and finding the bathroom. Dry blood that littered his shirt crackled as he peeled the black material off, stepping into the shower and allowing the warm water to flow over his aching joints.As blood dripped from his hair and hands, marbling on the white tile below him, he saw her distorted face in each mangled swirl and his heart broke free of the chains that held it back. Pain ran rampant through his entire body as his breath became staggered and a sickening wave of vertigo consumed his mind. His hands slammed on the tile in front of him, catching him as he desperately tried to regain his composure. His heart beat left his chest, clawing its way up into his throat and holding the air in his lungs hostage. He pleaded with his body to relent, for an ounce of pity for his poor soul, but it refused to give in before dragging him to the darkest depths of his own mind. He quickly stumbled out of the shower, immediately scrambling for the orange bottle hidden deep within the black duffle on his floor. Shaky hands unscrewed the lid and forced 2 white pills into his stomach. His trembling body fell flattened against bed behind him and his conscious mind left his failing body. The stress fell from his shoulders and his lungs grew free from the iron grip his constricted throat held on them. He carefully lured his heart back into it’s cage before his body completely collapsed from exhaustion. 

When he awoke the next morning, Steve Rogers disappeared again and his body resumed its autonomous state, functioning as a separate entity than the once kind man that died when she had. He found himself on his laptop, reviewing the layout of the bunker that Robert Sanzenetti, the sniper responsible for her death, currently cowered in.  One main entrance, three small connecting air ducts, and a single elevator shaft were the only methods of entry to the small fortress depicted in the blueprints. He closed the computer with a huff and grabbed his keys along with the black baseball cap beside him, heading his black vehicle of the week.  He popped open the back, grabbing the large back case that covered the floor of his trunk before closing it with a slam.

It took hours to hike up the monstrous mountains that surrounded the bunker and when Steve finally arrived, the sun had begun its descent behind the very mountains he had just conquered. He patiently sat beneath the deep thicket of brush atop him that scraped his back with each minuscule movement he made. He frequently switched between the scope of his black FR F2 rifle, his camera, and the notebook that laid beside him, jotting down average time for post change, estimated heights and weights for each guard, and every weapon’s make and model. By 2 am, he knew each rotation twice and opted in favor of returning to the motel to gather more information on the faces he had captured with his camera. The trek downhill was kinder on his abused body and he made quick time, approaching the motel by the time a faint glow of dawn began to peek its head through the night's thick veil. He opened his trunk placing his rifle and other belongings into it before turning around and freezing. His eyes noticed the coin once aligned atop the door’s latch now laid, exposed on the cold concrete. He carefully grabbed the handgun hidden in his back seat and began placing each foot onto the concrete with a silent precision. He quietly slid his key into the door before slowly turning the knob. He held the gun level to his dark eyes, the bones in his wrist grinding as he slowly opened the door. 

“Who are you?” he growled as his thumb clicked the hammer down, effectively cocking the gun. The trespasser froze at his voice before turning to him with her jaw agape and wide, teary eyes. The color drained from his face as her sweet voice rang like a distant memory through his ears.

“Steve?”

[buckysbest]

CHAPTER FOUR: EASIER PAIRING: ex!Bucky barnes x reader Warnings: swearing, drinking (a lotttt) , smooching Series Summary: Bucky realizes one can only run from their problems for so long before they must returns home but he sure as hell wasn’t expecting her to be there when he did. Word Count: 1.7k A/N: this series is based off the album “calm” by 5sos. if you want to follow along in the album, listen to Easier while reading this! 

series masterlist // masterlist

Immediately after the meeting ended, you slipped out of the conference room and headed toward the front to check in with Max. There was no need for another disruption to your day and at this point, avoiding him was the foremost thought in your mind.

 Nat looped her arm through yours as you rounded the last turn into the lobby. “How is this the first time I’m seeing you in like… a month or something?”

“Hello to you too Natty” you chuckled, finding a seat on one of the many sofas lining the walls. “Wanna accompany me to my next appointment? I’m just waiting for Max to pull the car around” you wiggled your eyebrows prompting the return of your chuckle and pulling one out of Nat.

“Sergeant Barnes? Oh… you mean Bucky” The short brunette at security caught the attention of both you and Nat with her remark as you both turned your head toward the comment, almost in sync. “Yeah, no it's ok, he’ll know who it is!”

“No, Ma’m, I need your name for security clearance”

The woman gently smacked her forehead,”oh yeah! Duh! Camila Monroe!” Nat and I both made eye contact before returning to our suspicious stare-down of the intruder. “Bucky!” She threw her arms in the air and a shriek filled the open chamber that was the lobby as she jumped into the arms of a very unsuspecting Bucky. 

He caught her just in time and his large arms embraced the girl, “Camila?”

“Yeah silly goose! I wanted to surprise you!” she exclaimed, placing a steamy kiss on his lips. Knowing his hatred of PDA, your jaw to drop slightly at the length of their little interaction. Steve interrupted the two, clearing his throat and beginning the introduction process.

Nat pulled your shoulder closer to you and whispered into your ear, “who the fuck is Camilla?”

“Beats me nat…”  you sighed, excusing yourself and making a beeline for the exit, hiding your escape under the distraction that called herself Camilla. You  reminded yourself that you only needed to endure this for the week before you were back to your tiny apartment in the city. The kiss played in your mind like an excruciating highlight reel making your nail appointment feel years long. Despite your heart crumbling, you were never one to let down appearances so you sat through your nail fill with a dull smile on your face the entire time. Determined to hide out the rest of the day in your room, you left your nail tech an extra $200 tip for her silence and access to the back door. Your nail appointment ended about 20 minutes early so you could at least get a head start. Your tight dress clung to the brick wall of the salon as you ordered an Uber under the alias Nat had helped you create when you first got to know her. After it dropped you off at the compound, you used the west wing exit and snuck through the training compound, eventually ending on Nat’s balcony, directly next to yours. Your legs pushed off the edge of her balcony and came down rather gracefully on the landing of your concrete terrace. Pulling your phone from your pocket, you texted tony.

Y/N: Look tony, I need a break. This schedule I was given... It’s not happening today so call off your goons. If I see another one today, I will cause more damage than Steve his first night on Asgardian Liquor

Desperate for some reprieve from the day, you resorted to the books that lined your walls. Re-reads mostly but you never really minded that. By the time it reached midnight, you figured it was safe to exit and grab a snack. Gently opening the door, your bare feet pattered into the kitchen. Opening the freezer, you reached for your secret stash of ice cream only to realize it was completely gone. To be fair, it probably would have been gross after sitting in there for over a year. Opening the fridge, you were only met with further disappointment and it had never been more clear you lived with superheros. Green vegetables and other health conscious foods lined the shelves. It wasn't like you could cry over your ex while eating a head of freakin’ lettuce. You let out a groan and closed the door, abandoning your mission to find anything sweet in the kitchen and settling for a cup of water to take back to your room.

The next morning came and you awoke groggy from the lack of sleep to the loud knock that pounded on your door. 

“Miss.Y/N, do you know what time it is?!” Max exclaimed, a panicked look holding claim to his face. 

Your arm lazily came up to shield your eyes from the bright lights of the hallway as you quipped back, “No, Mr. Max, I do not know what time it is,”

“It's nearly 1! The banquet starts in 4 hours and you haven't even started getting ready! I’ve never seen you oversleep like this!”

You quietly groaned as 12 or so people invaded your room holding makeup, dresses, shoes, and hair supplies. “You’ll have to forgive me max, it's been a rough weekend,” you grumbled under your breath.

Almost instantly, you were swept away and worked on vigorously until almost 5pm on the dot. Your was makeup done to absolute perfection and your hair matched in both flawlessness and elegance. The yellow dress fit you a little too snuggly for your liking but its beautiful floral designs captivated your senses, distracting you from the corset that sucked the wind from your lungs. Yellow pumps adorned your feet with matching polish on each toe. You looked put together, key word being looked.

Insisting on escorting yourself to the ballroom, you snuck in the back door attempting to blend in with your surroundings. This plan was foiled almost instantly.

“Damn girl! You look good!” Sam exclaimed, gathering the attention of those around him. Heads swung around toward you and suddenly you were battling the compliments of Nat, Steve, Bruce, and Tony. Wanda was quick to grab your arm and pull you away, saving you momentarily.

“Where are you taking me?” 

You laughed, as her plan became more clear. She plopped you down at the open bar and took her seat next to you. Swinging around to the handsome barkeep she gathered his attention, “Can we get some shots please and thank you!” 

“Wanda, you know I don’t do shots.”

This time it was Steve's voice that caught your attention and rang over the noise “Bucky!!! Nice for you to join us!”

You peered over your shoulder to see him clad in a fitting suit and tie sporting the brunette, who was practically glued to him, on his side. Her perfectly curled hair hung over her bare shoulders, leading to a dress that must have been designed by the gods themselves. She looked stunning and her smile was far brighter than yours. 

“I’ll take a fucking shot” you groaned.

“’Atta girl” Wanda complimented. After a shot or two, Vision grabbed Wanda to introduce her with some important head of the company or CEO or something, leaving you to the mercy of strangers who bought you drink after drink, pitying you and the downward spiral that was quickly engulfing you. 

This vicious cycle was only broken when a familiar voice sounded from behind you, “Can I have whatever whiskey you are serving, please?” 

Your head slouched in your hand and you had a childish mope on your face as you struggled to place the voice and control yourself long enough to leave on the high barstool that you found yourself stuck on.

“Y/N?”

Sliding off your chair slightly, you mumbled a quiet uh-huh.

“Are you here with someone?”

You sadly shook your head, taking another sip from your drink before the man grabbed the drink from your hand.

“Love, don’t drink that..”

His hand grasped your arm gently, steadying you and offering to walk you back to your room. All you could do was nod so he lightly lifted you from your chair and led to the elevator, only releasing you when he placed you on your bed and leaned down to take off your shoes. As your eyes met his for the first time, you sobered up slightly when you realized who had escorted you up to your room.

 “Woah, W-woah, D-don’t touch me” you slurred, pushing Bucky back slightly with your foot. 

“Y/N, please. You’re clearly not ok, let me he-”

You leaned down and pulled his hand off of you, crawling back toward the safety of your bed.. 

“Y-yeah Bucky! I’m not ok! I’m stuck in this s-stinking city at this dumb party with these d-dumb people all because I got dragged back to this stupid compound which made everything freakin hurt because as soon as I enter those fucking doors, I see the life we could have had if you loved me half as much as I loved you! But nooooo, Barnes couldn't commit! Couldn’t say he fucking loved me and instead opted to leave me, on my ass, and move to a different fucking country! Now I have to look your stupid face every day! So yeah, I’m not ok! Every time I look at your stupid face I cant fucking breathe because I love you so much that I hate you. And to top it off, you completely blindsided me with, the girl you have, uhh C-Camilla or whatever her name is, and she is by your side constantly. Then you come into the party and I cant even stay mad at you because you look so fucking good.” Your sudden confession brought tears to your eyes. You pulled off your other heel and stood in front of him, whispering,“Can you just tell me what she has that I didn't?” 

His hand reached up to rub his neck as his line of sight stayed on the ground. “Y/N, it wasn't like that..”

You threw your arms in the air and rolled your eyes before crossing your arms.“Then what was it James? Cause I can't seem to piece it together” 

“I-I don’t know Y/-” 

“What was it?!” you screamed, the tears you previously held back now freely streaming down your face. 

“It was easier to go! Ok?!” he yelled back, causing you to jump slightly. “It was easier for me to run from you! I loved you so much that I couldn't fucking take it! Camilla means nothing to me! I can play her game as long as I fucking want because I don’t care about the risk! I couldn't risk you breaking my heart because if you did I would have NEVER recovered fr-”

He was interrupted when you threw your arms around his neck and slammed your lips into his.

[buckysbest]

CHAPTER THREE: I DON’T WANT TO PAIRING: best friend!peter parker x reader WARNINGS: swearing, heartbreak, slow burn, emotional turmoil?, mental breakdown level sadness, Aunt May being a bean too good for this world SERIES SUMMARY: peter parker is about to embark in the next chapter in his life with his best friends by his side. a secret relationship, a heartbroken girl, and the pains of growing might be strong enough to pry these friends apart. WORD COUNT: 1.3k Tags: @eridanuswave @whatareyouhidingpeter A/N: this series is based off the album “the pains of growing” by alessia cara! if you want to follow along, you can listen to I don’t want to (track 3 on the album)! i hope you are enjoying the story!

series masterlist // masterlist

You and Peter both had the same shock in your voice as you simultaneously gasped, “Liz?”

“Uhm, Hi.. Michelles here too” MJ waved, rolling her eyes and setting down the plant she held on the tile beneath her. You quickly got up and embraced the two of them.

“Man, I really missed you guys!” you smiled, dropping your arms from around them and grabbing the items that burdened their arms.

Liz chuckled, “Y/N… We’ve only been gone for like 2 weeks!”

“It felt like an eternity without my girls!” you laughed back, setting down your new plant and coffee pot on the kitchen before grabbing more plates and silverware. “Come, sit! They're totally enough for everyone!” 

You let out a giggle before continuing “ These boys wouldn't know portion control if it hit them in the face, plus it's Friday… Pasta night!” you giggled, setting places at the table for two new additions. 

The noodles flowed freely between your friends as you sunk toward the back of the conversation, eventually finding yourself just listening to the four. The girls spoke about their roommates and syllabus week, Liz commenting on the party scene and MJ commenting on the ignorance of Frat boys in her robotics class. Once again, day disappeared into night as your friends surrounded you and the dread of deja vu collapsed on your shoulders. 

The group migrated to the living room next. Ned insisted on finishing the show you had started at the beginning of the summer but almost everybody fell asleep by the time the first episode of the night ended. Peter left his seat and found his way up to his room as you followed his example, now finding yourself in the center of your bed, staring up at your ceiling and preparing for another endless night. A third set of footsteps soon creaked through the hall causing confusion to form on your face. As the door opened and closed in the room beside you, Liz’s voice soon filtered through your walls. 

A soft giggle sang through the barrier before a quiet, “Hey” followed. 

Your eyes widened as you cursed the thin walls that made up your apartment. For the next hour, you found yourself what must be your version of hell.The nauseatingly cute sentiments that left their mouths only dulled when the sound of lips connecting covered them. Each sound wave that invaded your room washed over you like a tidal wave, eventually drowning you in your own sorrow. Desperate for an escape, you quietly snuck out of your room and to the front of your new apartment building, placing you on the front porch of the brick building with your phone in hand. 

Despite the late time that stamped the upper right corner of your screen, you texted the only person you could think of. Within seconds, your phone illuminated with the face of Aunt May.

“Y/N? Are you ok?” her tinny voice rang through the small rectangle now glued to the side of your ear. The tears you had held in for the past month instantly began to fall.

“N-no” you sniffled, trying to find your breath again and regain composure.

“Whats wrong my love?” she soothed, prompting you to divulge the events of the past month in excruciating detail, beginning at the pool party, the not-so-secret phone calls over the summer, and ending at the events that took place just minutes earlier. Tears streamed down your face at an alarming rate as you struggled to form coherent sentences. 

“I’m so sorry Y/N” she offered before urging you to continue.

“I-I just can't do it anymore Aunt May. The minute my heart heals one wound, three more appear and it's so exhausting,” you paused, as your body rattled with exhaustion. “And you know what, it's the little things I can't shake. Like how he grabs her hand when he thinks nobody is looking, or how he knows her coffee order, or how his eyes light up at the sight of her,” you sobbed before pausing again in an attempt to gain some control over yourself. “and it hurts to know that there is no happy ending here for me. I tried to be mad at her… I really d-did but she's Liz. She’s perfect, kind, beautiful Liz who would break up with him if I even hinted at my feelings and I can’t hate her even if I tried. I keep trying to find a best case scenario here but it doesn't exist!” you sniffled, tilting the phone away from your face and wipe the tears from your eyes. Your body shook as you exhaled a sigh, “I am just so tired of it Aunt May. I-I can't physically keep this up.”

Your words hung in the air for a moment before Aunt May tried to comfort you. You sat on the phone for hours as she reassured you with her loving words but as the sun began to rise over the horizon, you bid your goodbyes and you snuck back into your room. Quietly shutting your door, you flipped the lock and  shut the blinds curling into your bed and allowing your eyes to finally rest. Your body melted into the mattress as each weary limb collapsed beneath you and you fell into a deep sleep. 

                                                         •••

A sharp knock at your door startled your eyes open and your body awake as adrenaline pumped through your body. Grounding yourself into your surroundings, you relaxed and wrapped your blankets around your body before slowly unlocking the door and opening it. 

“Hey Y/N we were all going to- woah… are you ok? Have you been crying?” Concern instantly wrapped Peter's face as his warm, kind eyes met your red, puffy ones. 

Your fatigued body mustered up the best smile it could as you reassured him, “No, I’m ok, I’m just really tired Peter so I’m just gonna go back to sleep.” 

You closed the door and locked it again before he could respond before sinking to the ground. You thanked your body for relinquishing the little bit of strength you had left to put on a brave face in front of Peter and you tried to calm yourself by finding some comfort in your room. As your eyes scanned the space, the dread that bubbled in your stomach grew. Every picture and memento seemed to mock your broken state as they replayed memories of happier times. Beginning at the photos that lined your dresser, you slowly gathered every individual trinket that decorated your room and placed them in your closet, closing it and collapsing on your bed once more. Your phone buzzed relentlessly throughout the day as concerned texts and calls from your friends flooded your lock screen. It wasn't until 2 that your phone died, leaving you in the quiet you so desperately craved.

Your radio silence continued through the week, well after MJ and Liz returned to NYU. With your new sleep schedule adjusted to contrast your roommates, you occasionally slipped out of your room at odd hours of the night to gather enough food to sustain yourself.  

This system had been working so you grew more comfortable as you snuck into the kitchen for a fourth night in a row, grabbing some fruit from the bottom drawer of your fridge and returning back to your room. You closed the door, locking it behind you and crawled into your bed, wrapping yourself the blankets before you began to snack on the apple in hand.

A small shriek left your mouth as the light flipped on, revealing Peter with arms crossed and a scowl painted on his face. He plopped down on the floor in front of the door effectively blocking your only exit from the dreadful situation you now faced.

“We need to talk.”