#bucktommy goes to the pegasus galaxy fic

[911coded]

Maddie and Eddie get poked a bit for all their “help” since the break up, but some good conversations are had. 🥹

Chapter 4: Ready To Lose

Buck knocks on Eddie’s door the next morning with a hangover and one last tin of christmas cookies. When Eddie comes to the door and sees the tin in his hand, his face falls.

“Aw, man, I can’t eat any more sweets!” Eddie whines. Buck chuckles as he brushes past him.

“Last batch, I promise, I’m just finishing up the last of my baking ingredients. I’m trying to clean out my kitchen and I need to talk to you about something,” Buck explains. Despite his whining, Eddie takes the tin from Buck's hand and stuffs a cookie in his mouth and motions for the kitchen.

“What’s up? You don’t look great,” Eddie said. Buck rolls his eyes and takes a seat at the kitchen table.

“Yeah, I got wine drunk with Karen yesterday afternoon which turned into evening as we talked through some decisions I needed to make,” Buck revealed.

“I hope you know you could have come to me, Buck. Just because I’m moving back to Texas doesn't mean we can’t talk, man, it just means it will be over facetime or text,” Eddie insisted.

“I know that, we’re good Eddie, I promise. I just needed to talk to someone who didn’t have a personal interest in my decisions and experience working for a classified program,” Buck explained.

Eddie chokes on the latest cookie, “Class-w-what?” Eddie asked, getting up to wipe his face with a napkin.

“Yeah, so I contacted an old friend when I found out Tommy had run away to Antarctica. He’s a civilian contractor with the air force and when I met him, he was stationed out of McMurdo, which is,” Buck said, waving a hand in the air.

“Where Tommy is, yeah. So, you are finally ready to chase him?” Eddie asked. Buck gave him a side eye with a huff and crossed his arms over his chest. “Come on, now, I apologized for the phone keep away thing!” Eddie exclaimed with a finger poke to Buck’s chest. Buck swatted his hand away and leaned forward, resting his chin on a fist.

“Anyway, this friend I mentioned talked to some of his coworkers and the next thing I know I’m getting a job offer and a retired general is traveling to the other side of the world to talk to Tommy about a job possibility, too,” Buck said.

“Jesus, Buck, who is your friend?”

“A botanist.”

“What the fuck?” Eddie swatted at the air with a hand. “Never mind. Classified. Right. Are you sure about this, Buck?”

“Yeah, I think it’s important and I know enough to be cautiously optimistic that this could be really great. I want more for my career and with you leaving, the station will lose heavy rescue status until you come back or they replace you. Either way, I would probably need to move on. When Bobby retires, Hen or Chim will be in place to take over and I’m not sure that captain is what I want next anyway. Maddie is settled with Chim and we don’t need each other for support the same way we did before. Worst case, one or both of us joins the program for 6 months to a year and then we come back to Los Angeles….” Buck trailed off.

“Or best case it’s an amazing opportunity and the two of you are wildly happy on some classified base doing big damn hero things and get married and adopt a couple of adorable babies,” Eddie finished with a shit-eating grin and a waggle of eyebrows.

***********************************

Evan.Buckley13@gmail.com

To: David.Parrish.civ@mail.mil

Dave,

You are nuts but I’m in. I put in for a leave of absence with the LAFD for 6 months. I can make a commitment with your program right now without any other information for that much time. I trust you, but without knowing what I’ll be doing, I don’t want to cut off the possibility of coming back to LA.

I’m renting out my loft to another firefighter for at least the next six months and already packed up my personal stuff to go into storage with my jeep. I’ve said all my goodbyes and I’ve contracted with a rental agency to manage everything for me, so I’m pretty much set. I just need to know what to bring with me, or what is safe to bring, and I can be in Colorado Springs on Monday.

Was it Jack that met with Tommy? How did it go? I’ve been trying not to think about it but I’m worried about Tommy. Is he ok? He’s very good at the stoic military man schtick, but he’s gotta be freaking out if General Jack gave him any information. (Do you think he hates me for bringing him to the attention of your generals? I’m trying to stay positive but you know more than anybody what I’m like.) I can’t think anymore, I’m booking the tickets and I’ll send you another message later today with my flight information. Should I expect a pick up/escort or do I make my way there myself?

Later,

Buck

**************************************************************

Buck was stacking boxes in the corner of the kitchen and trying to decide whether he should leave his towels or take them with him (they were really nice, really fluffy towels) when someone knocked on his door.

He opened it to find Maddie standing there impatiently.

“Uh, come in? I thought I was coming to dinner tonight. Did I forget something we had planned?” he asked, rubbing the back of his neck. Maddie bustled around Buck and took in the stack of boxes.

“What’s going on, are you moving?” Maddie asked.

Buck walked around Maddie and went back to closing up the last box, “Not exactly. I was going to tell you tonight that I put in for a leave of absence for some training in Antarctica right after New Years. I leave Monday.”

“Wait. You are going where?!!” Maddie exclaimed and twisted her hands together.

Buck sighed, already done with this conversation. “I’m taking a leave of absence from the LAFD and going to Antarctica. I am going to be an on-call firefighter and help with SAR at the Air Force base down there for a few months. I’ll be back in plenty of time for my newest nibling to be born. This is why I wanted to have this conversation over dinner where we could all stay calm and I could explain properly.”

“That-that’s not the point. I thought you were going to let the universe bring you someone special,” Maddie said, searching for a way to turn the conversation around.

“No, Maddie, that’s what you said, but I didn’t agree. I had already found my someone special. We just need to sit down and talk out how to work around our insecurities. I have a plan,” Buck stated calmly.

“And it includes going to Antarctica?” Maddie asked.

“Well, that’s where Tommy is at the moment.”

Maddie scoffed, crossing her arms, “So, you’re what, moving halfway around the world for a boy?!”

Buck tilted his head and raised an eyebrow at his sister in disbelief.

“Maddie, I’m not asking you what to do here, I’m letting you know what I have decided,” Buck insisted. Ok, this is what we are doing now. Awesome. “Look, I’m sorry that going to you every time I’m confused about things gave you the impression that I need you to tell me what to do before I make a move in my life. I do that because I want you to be part of my life. We lived apart for more than ten years before you came to LA. And I grew into an adult in that time. Sure, I made the sort of decisions that late teens, early twenties men make sometimes, but I made a life for myself without you. I just didn’t want it that way. I like talking out my problems with you, I just don’t like that it gives others the idea that I can’t make decisions without help from someone else. My brain works on a problem best by talking it out, I just happen to like talking it out with you. If I needed advice on how to deal with a relationship runner, I’d talk to Chimney.” Maddie gasps and sits down at the dining table, looking stricken.

Buck winced and attempted to redirect. “I’m not blaming you for it, we are past that. It’s just the different ways we deal with anxiety. And I know you are working on it in therapy, I can see how well you and Chim are doing, but can you honestly say that every bump in the road doesn’t send your brain for a millisecond into run mode?” He asked and reached across the table for Maddie’s hand and gave it a squeeze.

Maddie slumped down to rest her head on her arm on the table and sighed, “No, I can’t. So what do you need my help with?”

Buck smiled softly at his sister, “I just need your support. I’m trying something new with my life. This may grow into an amazing opportunity for my professional life as well as a way to get my personal life back on track. I made friends in all those years of wandering around, taking odd jobs and learning new things. I have contacts that I can call for information or advice. It wasn’t all partying and sex, you know.” Maddie turned her head to face Buck with a skeptical look on her face and a badly hidden smirk.

Buck huffed and rolled his eyes, “Well, ok, there was plenty of partying and sex but wait, so, I worked as a bartender in Virginia Beach, got my mixology certification. Uh, I worked construction in NOLA, learned a ton about remodelling old houses. Then, there was Montana, where I worked as a ranch hand, learned about horses and how to lasso a calf, but I also trained to do SAR work in the mountains. I went to Coronado and did the SEAL trails where I learned how hard I could push my body and how to handle a weapon. That didn’t work out, I didn’t have the right mindset for that kind of life, so I headed south and ended up in Peru bartending again, while also volunteering for SAR work. After about a year, I followed some guys that were going to share a house here in LA. I had seen a movie about firefighters one weekend and decided that firefighting could be what I was looking for, so I decided to join the academy. That’s the highlights, anyway,” Buck finished his speech with a wave of his hand and a shrug.

“Why didn’t you tell me about any of this before?” Maddie asked, sitting up to give him her full attention.

“No one asked.” Buck shrugged, “I know we talk, but when you first got here, I was afraid to say anything to upset you so you wouldn’t leave again and you needed me to need you. Then after a while….” Buck trailed off.

“No one asked,” they finished together.

Maddie sighed, “Here’s something I can give you.” She visually braced herself, “He’s going to have a hundred reasons why he did the right thing. Reasons why he’s not right for you. That you deserve better. He’ll sound completely reasonable, logical even. But, he’s not afraid that he’s not good enough. He’s afraid that someday you will realize that you can do better. And that you’ll want to. That you will think he’s not good enough. So, he convinces himself that this way is better. But, he was already too far in at the first sign of cracks on the surface. You get to be happy. He doesn’t deserve it, but you do. And that’s all that matters in the end.”

“Fuck,” Buck rasped.

Maddie pushed on, voice strained, “You have to convince him that you are aware of the risks. That you know what you are getting into. That you know very well about his flaws and various neuroses. But, you want to put in the work. That you are going to put in the work. That your future doesn’t work without him in it, so he’s just gonna have to deal with that. But, if that all fails, promise me little brother, if he can’t love you back, if he’s too far gone to come back, don’t bury yourself with him. You know him better than I do, better than Howie and Hen. You’ll know if putting in the work will get you what you want.”

Buck stared at his sister, wide-eyed, “Wow. Therapy is really working for you.” Maddie huffed a laugh and wiped tears from under her eyes. “Thanks,” Buck said sincerely.

Maddie giggled softly, “For what? Spewing my therapy notes all over you?”

“No,” Buck said. “For giving me advice on how to love a runner.” They both sniffed back tears and stood to hug it out. “Wait. Why did you come over, anyway?” Buck asked.

Maddie laughed a little manically, “I’m craving. I really need one of your lemon loaves.”

*******************************************

David.Parrish.civ@mail.mil

To: Evan.Buckley13@gmail.com

Buck,

The good news is that your Tommy seems to be pretty cool under pressure. The bad news is that the pressure was Jack. 😬I should have insisted that John go. In fact, when Jack came back to the mountain with Daniel still yelling at him, I asked John to go make the actual job offer. Let the flyboys bond over the quiet of Antarctica in a helicopter. I’m afraid that Jack jumped ahead with some of the classified stuff, so hold off on contacting him just yet. You’ll get your chance soon, I promise. Daniel did say that Tommy was worried about how Jack knew of you, and I can see from your last message that you’re worried about him, too. I think he and John will have a good talk.

On to the fun stuff! Clothes wise, bring an assortment of casual clothes for all types of weather, BDU’s will be provided for anything on duty. The base is on the ocean, so anything you need for recreation on the water, bring it, there are usually surfboards to borrow. As far as personal electronics go, you are welcome to bring what you want but your phone won’t work once you get there. Someone will be sent to pick you up from the airport, I don’t know yet who.

I’m really looking forward to seeing you in person again, Buck. I really think you will like it here.

There’s nothing quite like it on earth, and I think you’ll fit right in. See you Monday!

Dave

Tags for those who asked: @eliotwaughdeservesbetter @grimmsdead @anangrylittlehobbit

[911coded]

Chapter 3: You Are In Love

Buck pulled up outside of the house and sighed. He knew he needed to talk to someone about his decision who wouldn’t coddle him, someone that didn’t have skin in the game so to speak. Someone that could be somewhat objective, and maybe, maybe someone who knew more about the rabbit hole in which he was tempted to jump. Colorado Springs added a clue, which connected to Dave’s occasional mention of “the mountain”. Cheyenne Mountain used to be home to NORAD, but now seems to be studying deep-space radar telemetry. That has to be the worst cover story he’s ever heard.

At his knock, he heard footsteps coming closer and the door opened to Karen.

“Buck? Hen’s out, she took the kids to the park.”

“Yeah, I know. She told us about it last shift. I wanted to talk to you. Can I come in?” he asked sheepishly.

Karen’s eyes widened in surprise, “Of course! Come in! Are you ok?” She looked worriedly at him but ushered him inside to the living room. “Sit, please, do you want some water? You look freaked out,” Karen said, bustling toward the kitchen to grab a glass of water. When she returned with two glasses of water and sat one in front of him, Buck took a deep breath and dove in.

“Do you know anything about the facility in Cheyenne Mountain?” Buck asked while trying to will her to realize that he knows something.

Karen looks over Buck’s shoulder for a moment, several emotions flitting across her face until it settles on mild interest. “Isn’t that where NORAD is located? Something about space telemetry?”

Buck bites back a sigh, “Right, yeah. Maybe we should start with how I met David Parrish and Evan Lorne in Peru.” Karen’s face fights to stay at polite interest and she gestures for Buck to continue. “Uhm. I was in Peru for about a year all together and it was at the end of that first summer when I was bartending in one of the beach tourist spots and one day these two guys came in. Although they dressed just like the rest of the tourists, they carried themselves differently. More alert, aware of everything and everyone around them. The slightly shorter, stocky guy was pretty intense. He didn’t talk much but smiled warmly while the other guy, David the botanist, talked my ear off about plant life in different climates and how to reliably transport plants from different biomes to greenhouses in climates most plants would never grow. That’s when the US Air Force came up and that they were both stationed out of McMurdo.” Karen’s jaw dropped and Buck pointed a finger at her, “Right?! So, now I’m interested. Most people wouldn’t even think anything of it but I did a deep dive on remote US military bases when I was in SEAL training and I knew he was talking about Antarctica. Next thing I know, I’m sucked into a fierce discussion about plant life in Antarctica and the various species of penguins found there. We ended up closing down the bar talking, all while Lorne guarded David’s back and sipped at a couple of beers. Occasionally, I would catch him looking at David with this indulgent smile on his face. That’s when I realized that they were together. That they weren’t just two coworkers traveling together, but lovers that worked together. They were so in sync with each other I don’t know how I missed it at first. I wanted that, so much, but I don’t think I realized what it was I was feeling back then. I just thought, ‘Wow, these guys are so cool!’ When I caught Tommy looking at me with that same indulgent, sappy, smile on his face, that’s when I knew he was it for me. I had found what I didn’t even know I had been looking for.” Buck chuckled and raised watery eyes from the focused attention on his trembling hands clasped in his lap.

Karen gasped and reached out to cover his hands with hers. She gave him a few moments to collect himself then gave them a squeeze, “What happened next?” she asked.

Buck shrugged, “Their leave was up, they went home. I took them on a couple of hikes I knew of while they were there, but a couple of days later, they were gone. I’ve never said anything to the others at the firehouse or Maddie, but David and I email each other at least once a week. He shares benign gossip about his coworkers without much context and interesting plants he is studying. I tell him about rescues and single life in Los Angeles. From context clues, I’ve put together that they aren’t in Antarctica anymore, if they ever were, and we pretend that I don’t know whatever it is that they do, is highly classified.”

Karen sighs and slumps in her chair, “You know I can’t tell you anything.”

“I know”

“Not that I know much of anything, but I can infer plenty,” she continues. “Why did you come to me about this if you knew I wouldn’t be able to say anything?” Karen asks with a huff.

“Because Tommy transferred to McMurdo for six months and I’m done being patient.”

“He did what?!” Karen exclaimed, now sitting straight up in her chair and frantically clutching Buck’s hands.

“He got a job flying supplies and, I don’t know, patrolling the area? There are regular bulletins that announce transfers and advancements in the LAFD. Tommy’s transfer was on this week’s bulletin. I found out Monday. He’s already gone.” It was Buck’s turn to slump into his chair and press the heels of his hands to his eyes. “I was giving him some time, you know? I messed up asking him to move in with me, I always get ahead of myself when I’m anxious, and I could tell he was starting to freak out. Then, I panicked and started spewing all this stuff that didn’t make any sense. The next I knew, he was saying I was going to break his heart and he wasn’t my last and practically ran out the door. I thought that when he didn’t come back or call that I would give him some time to calm down, to miss me, then I would chase after him and talk out what a mess we both made of that conversation, but then….this,” Buck waved his hands around in the air. “I emailed David thinking that he could get me in touch with someone at McMurdo that would be interested in my SAR work, that I could chase after what I want for once. I could join Tommy in Antarctica for a few months, we could work on our relationship without any interference from the peanut gallery or anywhere else for him to run and then we could come back to our lives. But, Karen, Dave said he could easily get me a job, get both of us a job in their program if I wanted it. He said that we both have the skills that they need. But he also said that I needed to think hard about it because it would change our whole lives. He said that I needed to decide if I wanted to fall down the rabbit hole. This wouldn’t be just a leave of absence for a few months, this could be a new life, new career, somewhere that is not LA, starting over completely. Possibly an opportunity to do more, to be more….I don’t even know what all yet.”

“Fuck,” Karen breathed. Buck burst into hysterical laughter and after a few seconds, Karen joined him. Every couple of minutes they would start to calm down and one of them would burst out with “Radar telemetry!” or “Follow the white rabbit, Neo!” and the giggles would start up again.

By the time Hen and the kids came home Buck and Karen were snuggled on the couch together, several glasses of wine in and heckling “Wormhole X-Treme!” * Hen shooed Denny and Mara down the hall and wandered into the living room.

“Should I be worried?” Hen asked, standing over where her wife and friend seem to have intertwined.

“Nope!” Karen chirped, “Buck decided to follow the white rabbit and then go see about a boy!” Buck started to giggle so hard he fell off the couch with a loud thump, which started off Karen again. Hen left the room shaking her head.

“Drink some water!”

* “Wormhole X-Treme!” is the fake show within a show (not unlike Hot Shots)that was presumably allowed to exist in case of any leaks about the Stargate program.

tags of those who asked 🥰: @eliotwaughdeservesbetter @anangrylittlehobbit @grimmsdead

[911coded]

Chapter 8: Take Me Back To The Start

After Sam led Tommy away to sign the massive NDA (Buck pitied his poor, beautiful hands), Dave grabbed Buck’s wrist and began pulling him along.

”I want to show you something,” he insisted.

“I’ve already seen the gate, what more is there to see when every hallway looks exactly the same?” Buck grumbled.

With another turn down another identical hallway, Buck was now well and truly lost, “It’s down here,” Dave said.

Buck was starting to get suspicious, though. In fact, “Wait. Haven’t we…,” Dave had opened a door before he could finish his sentence, swung Buck around, and shoved him through the doorway. Buck stumbled forward and the door slammed shut, audibly locking behind him.

“You too, huh?” Tommy asked behind him.

Buck whirled around in shock to find Tommy sitting at a small table in the center of the room, “Tommy?! W-What is going on?” he asked.

“They told me to wait. The door didn’t lock until just now, so your guess is as good as mine,” Tommy shrugged and tried to look relaxed but Buck knew him well enough to tell that he was concerned about what was going on too.

At this point, Buck lost his temper, he was absolutely done with all of his friends, “Assholes! First, it’s Eddie and Hen playing keep-away with my phone when you’re bubbling me and now Dave and probably Lorne and Sam have decided to lock us in a room together? To do what?! Why am I not allowed to make my own decisions?!” Buck pounded a fist on the locked door, “Dave! You dick, let us out of here!!” When there was, of course, no response, Buck flopped down in an uncomfortable chair with a huff and decided to wait them out, temper simmering, waiting for a target.

“Buck…” Tommy muttered.

Buck jumped to his feet again and moved as far away as he could in the small room, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, “No! Fuck you! You don’t get to call me that!” he shouted in frustration.

“It’s your name,” Tommy pointed out.

“Not when you say it. Hearing the nickname I’ve used to hide from my past coming out of your mouth feels like getting stabbed in the gut every time!” Buck clutched a fist and hugged his waist, “You called me Buck on your way out the door and I lost the ability to breath. I just froze, it hurt so bad. Haven’t you hurt me enough?! Hurt us both enough?!”

Tommy looked shocked at his outburst, “I wasn’t trying to hurt you, I just….”

“What does it matter what you were trying to do when that’s what happened? I said something stupid again, I was too much, and then you bailed, just like everyone else. That’s what happened,” Buck sighed and sat back down, looking and sounding exhausted. “I gave you time ‘cause that’s what I thought you wanted,” Buck muttered. Now Tommy is the one feeling like he was being stabbed in the gut.

“You’ve had time to miss me, to miss us. I was trying to give that to you, to give us the time to think about what we really wanted. Since that night, all I’ve wanted was an adult conversation, not whatever this is,” Buck added, gesturing around the room. He huffed and crossed his arms, turning away to stare at the wall.

The room was silent, Tommy tried to think of what to say but anything he could come up with seemed inadequate and he was afraid nothing could fix this. But Tommy’s nerves were getting to him, and there wasn’t enough floor space to pace, so talking about anything that came to mind it was, “I had a conversation today. With a spaceship.”

Buck perked up and tilted his head in question, “With a spaceship? How does that work?” he leaned forward in his chair, his narrowed gaze intense.

“I have no idea. It knew about us. Both of us….I haven’t had time to freak out about that yet.” Tommy’s voice cracked, and Buck looked at Tommy, really looked at him. The calm facade was starting to break down. Buck took in a sharp breath. “I was also beamed up to another spaceship a-a couple of hours ago? Is that right? It hasn’t even been a day since I found out aliens are real and wormhole travel has been happening for years and I-I’m just…” Tommy faltered, unable to continue. He buried his head in his hands and gripped his hair. 

Buck stood up and rushed over, leaning down and wrapping his arms around Tommy’s head and shoulders, “Shit. Come here. I’m so sorry.” Tommy stiffened in surprise for a moment, then melted into the embrace, burying his face in Buck’s stomach and clutching at the back of his shirt, “This is my fault. I panicked when I found out you left and I knew Dave was involved with shit but I just couldn’t-I couldn’t let you go without trying to follow and now I’ve dragged you in it with me. I’m so sorry, Tommy. Look, I’ll-I’ll talk to them. You haven’t signed anything yet and maybe if I commit to longer they’ll be happy just taking me. You can go back home to LA and the LAFD and pick back up your life. And I’ll leave you alone, I promise. You can be friends with Chim again without me there, being too much, and I’ll go to Atlantis and boss around Dave’s baby minions like he wants and I’ll be fine. I will. I’ll find a new hobby to keep myself from…well I’ll occupy myself somehow and you can just go back to your life and be happy again and mmmph!” Tommy had shoved to his feet, eyes wide and panicked, interrupting Buck with a broad hand over his mouth and an arm around his waist. 

Tommy tilted his head to make eye contact with Buck, “Evan, no, that’s not what I want! Look at me, please. Do you want to go to Atlantis?” Buck’s eyes flicked away, his hands clenched into fists at his side. But, Tommy cradled his face and Buck focused on Tommy as his eyes began to sting with tears, “Evan. Do you want to go to Atlantis with me and learn how to fly ships with our minds?” Tommy took his hand off Buck’s mouth and watched his face, trying to read what he was thinking.

Buck licked his lips, chasing the taste of Tommy’s skin, “With you?” The tears fell and Tommy wiped them away.

“With me,” Tommy replied softly. He looked directly into Evan’s eyes and prayed that what he was seeing in those beautiful, blue eyes was hope.

Buck took a trembling breath, “Honestly, I’d follow you anywhere, if you’d let me. But, yes, I do want to go to Atlantis. I want to do this. I want to help them. I think it could be really good for me.”

Tommy looked at the excitement and hope sparking to life in Buck’s eyes and bobbed his head in a nod, “Yeah, for me too. Let’s go to Atlantis.”

“And we’ll talk? About us?” Buck asked hopefully.

Tommy pulls him into his arms and holds tight, “We’ll talk. I’m not angry with you about what your emails dragged me into. It’s just-it’s been a really long week and we still have more to learn. I’m overwhelmed and struggling to take it all in. And, it’s going to be ok. WE will be ok. I know we need to talk and I’m sorry I didn’t talk to you that night. I’m sorry I just walked out. I-I regretted it right away but….I wasn’t sure that I even deserved to take it back. I still think you could do better than me and the garbage I’ve been dragging around, but I’ve been informed that I’m not allowed to make decisions about what you need and deserve,” he said with a slight smirk.

“Wow. How did that happen?” Buck asked playfully with a soft chuckle.

“An old pilot with similar issues gave me a talking to and, well….when the ship talked to me in Antarctica, they asked if WE would come home. And in that moment, most of my fear just fell away. I just felt….I couldn’t imagine going without you so I knew I was going to have to talk to you, to tell you all the things I avoided talking about before, and to see if we could work out how to move forward,” Tommy said.

There was a muffled thump at the door and Buck could hear Sam ask someone why the door wouldn’t open. They separated and attempted to appear as if they hadn’t been having an emotional moment in a locked room. They had themselves mostly back to normal when an airman shoved the door open with his shoulder and turned to hold it open for Sam with a nod, “Ma’am, is there anything else I can help you with?”

“Thank you Sargeant, that will be all. Please notify Stilinski about the difficulty with the door on this room,” Sam instructed.

“Right away, ma’am,” with a salute, which Sam returned, the airman left them alone.

“Any questions before we get Mr. Kinard started on his NDA, gentlemen?”

“I just need a list of supplies I’ll need to bring with me. My bags are packed for Antarctica, I have no idea what I’ll need for a whole other galaxy,” Tommy explained.

Another man entered the room and placed a folder on the table, “Recommended reading for the Pegasus Galaxy, ma’am. Dr. Jackson put it together for new recruits, it includes a suggested packing list,” he stated, nodded at Buck and Tommy, then left again without another word.

“How-” Buck started.

“That’s Walter, he does that. The man refuses to retire. I think he’s afraid if he leaves, the place will fall apart,” Sam explained with a shrug.

“I’ll get you two a couple of tablets loaded with history of the SGC and after action reports of notable missions to add to your homework. Tomorrow, we can get started on medical and physical assessments,” Sam said with a grin.

After an eternity of signing his name to a truly terrifying document, Tommy and Buck were released from the mountain to find a hotel room, Lorne offered to set them up in visitor rooms, but with a glance at Buck, Tommy knew they needed a little more privacy tonight. 

Evan was quiet on the walk to the base vehicle they were issued and opened the passenger door without discussion. “What are you thinking about?” Tommy asked. 

“I started wondering about the gene, whether it was a mistake or an accident, but I don’t think it can be, so that brings up a whole list of questions that I don’t know how to find the answers to,” Buck replied absently.

Tommy frowned, “I don’t understand. How or why would the gene be a mistake or accident?”

The GPS interrupted Buck’s answer as it announced their arrival at their destination.

Buck followed Tommy into the elevator and then down the hall where Tommy stopped to slide a keycard in a door. Tommy led an oblivious Buck into the room with a hand on his arm and Buck plopped down to sit on one of the beds.

“Evan. Evan, could you explain what you mean?”

“I never told you about Daniel, my brother,” Buck said hesitantly.

“I didn’t know you had a brother,” Tommy whispered.

“I didn’t either until just a few years ago,” Buck took a deep breath to steady his nerves. “My brother Daniel had juvenile leukemia and no one in the family was a match to donate bone marrow. They decided to make one. Me. I was designed to be a match but it didn’t work and Daniel died anyway. I’m wondering now whether the gene that makes alien tech talk to me is there because Daniel had it or if it was an accident in the process. I try not to think about being created in a lab but the idea just hit me when we were walking out and wouldn’t let go. Then I realized that I never told you about him. We didn’t talk about the hard things, I guess.”

“I’m sorry that you lost your brother, but how did you not know about him until a few years ago?” Tommy asked.

“When he died, our parents essentially shut down. They moved us to another town where no one knew them or what they had done and refused to speak about Daniel again. They got rid of all of his things, swore a ten year old Maddie to secrecy, and checked out of their lives. Maddie and I raised ourselves. We were our only family and each other’s only source of affection and love. Maddie didn’t tell me about Daniel at all until she was pregnant with Jee and invited our parents to LA for a visit and even then, it was an accident. I saw a picture of a little boy who looked like me but couldn’t have been me so the whole thing came out,” Buck sighed, exhausted. “I’ll have to ask when we get our physicals if they want to check it out. The thing is, I avoided talking about my parents because Maddie still wants us all to have a relationship with each other. They try but I can’t help but think that they try because Maddie expects them to, not because they want to. I spent my entire childhood trying to get them to love me only to find out as an adult that whether they want to or not, they blame the infant me for not being able to save Daniel. So. That’s my tragic backstory, the source of most of my worst habits and biggest insecurities. Tada!!” Buck attempts a grin and manages a lopsided smile with jazz hands instead, “Your turn before I cry and this gets a million times worse.” Buck gestures at Tommy to pass on the pain dumping.

Tommy huffs a laugh at Buck’s attempt to lighten the mood, “I’m not sure where to start. You know about my father, there isn’t a specific story there….anger issues, homophobia. A man who should have never been a parent at all. I’ve got a handle on most of that, but he isn’t why I ran.”

“Could you tell me what I said to….trigger you, I guess? I know I got ahead of myself with the moving in thing but looking back, you kind of shut down at some point while I was talking?” Buck tentatively asked.

Tommy nodded and tried to feel out the words as he said them, “First, I want to say that I honestly don’t think that you being bisexual had anything to do with it, despite what it sounded like when I started throwing words at you about you figuring yourself out. I heard you ask me to move in with you and then it felt like I blacked out and was already outside trying to get home before I fell apart. I know I hurt you and I can never say sorry enough. I regret it every day.” Tommy fidgeted, restless with twitching fingers, “Okay. Um. Years ago, after Abby, when I was first out, I met Jason. He was kind and funny, and he treated me like a partner, like I was worth more than what I could do for him,” he started slowly. “I learned how I want to be loved in a romantic relationship, and for that alone, I can’t regret meeting him even if it ended badly. It was really good while it lasted. Jason had a best friend, Ryan, who he had known since college. Ryan was dating Lisa, had been for several years when I met them, and we often went on double dates together. It was fun, we all got along and when Jason and I had been dating for about a year, the two of us started talking about moving in together.”

“Oh,” Buck breathed.

“Yeah. I didn’t-I didn’t see it coming. We had been floating around the idea of marriage, just to see if we were on the same page and looking for an apartment when Lisa and Ryan had a messy breakup. Public, in front of all their friends, messy. I didn’t think anything of it when Jason talked about how hard Lisa was taking the split. Hindsight,” he shrugged. “A few weeks later, Jason ended things abruptly, with reasons that didn’t make any sense and I was left floundering. Now, Lisa is coming around to comfort me and I’m reeling and devastated, a complete mess of a person for weeks. Turns out, Jason had been carrying a torch for Lisa since he met her when Ryan introduced his new girlfriend all those years ago,” Tommy continues.

“They break up and Jason sees an opportunity to go for it,” Buck added.

“Yep. He never mentioned that he was bisexual. Not that it mattered, Lisa or Luke, he still dumped me while we were in the middle of making a commitment to each other. I was barely out the door before he was telling all his friends that he was in love with Lisa. I kind of went off the deep end a bit,” Tommy confessed.

“What did you do?” Buck asked.

“I fucked Ryan, his best friend,” Bucks snorts a laugh and grins in Tommy’s direction as he continues. “I ran into him at a bar, we were both feeling sorry for ourselves and drinking too much. I kissed him then took him back to my place and fucked him silly. The next morning, he thanked me and left, I never saw him again,” Tommy paused, shaking his head. “I made an appointment with a therapist two days later. I honestly thought I had worked through all of it in therapy, but you mentioned moving in and you’re right, I shut down. And then instead of talking, I ran. My mind was running circles around itself. I was sure that there was no way you could want me. I felt like you saw the version of me that I project to the world, not the me that I am, the mess that I am,” Tommy explained. 

“Tommy, I see you. Of course, I see you. I knew you were a mess. It takes one to know one. The Tommy that you project, that calm, cool Tommy? He can be fun and he’s certainly sexy and competent, but he wouldn’t indulge me when I want to dress up and hold a funeral for a 200-hundred-year-old corpse. He wouldn’t make me feel so safe that I could be my entire bratty self without fear of being too much. My Tommy is bitchy and sarcastic. He tells terrible jokes, likes monster truck rallies, never passes up a slice of cake, and cries at movies. That’s the Tommy I want, that’s the one…the one I fell in love with.”

Tags ❤️💕: @eliotwaughdeservesbetter @anangrylittlehobbit @grimmsdead @fiyaerrigan

[911coded]

First Words of 2025

[911coded]

Chapter 6: Don’t Dream It’s Over

The silence stretched uncomfortably and Tommy couldn’t think with enough clarity to even know what to say, what to do. What was even happening here? He could feel himself spiraling into panic again as his eyes watered.

John crouched and leaned over, “Hey, Tommy?” he whispered.

Tommy blinked, sighed, and turned his head to look at John from where he was now fully extended in the recliner from hell, “Yeah, John?”

“We can fly spaceships. With our minds,” he whispered with an encouraging grin.

Wide-eyed, Tommy turned his head back to the rocky ceiling, blinked, and suddenly it’s as if his body and mind clicked back together. “Cool,” he breathed.

“Would you like to see the ships that you will be able to pilot, Thomas?” The voice was gentle, hesitant, and seemed to be coming from the chair but also through Tommy’s mind, the same voice that he had struggled to understand while flying earlier.

Tommy glanced at John out of the corner of his eye for directions, but he seemed to be just as flummoxed as Tommy was at the conversation, so he decided to play along again, “Um, sure?” 

“Our sister ship, Atlantis, lost her fighters to the great war, but she has several small gateships that Primus Filius seems to enjoy.” An image of the base of a great steel city floating on an endless ocean was projected in the air above his reclined body and he and John watched as a tube shaped ship with wings darted into frame and seemed to skim along the water before rising to fly to the city glittering on the dark sea.

*******************

The check-in process was fairly painless with Lorne at his side, though the guards gave him quite the look when they asked if he had any weapons. 

”Swords, Buck?” Lorne chuckled, “I feel like every time I see you, you have a new surprise for me.”

“Eh, I got the impression that I would have to come up with things to do in my down time and I’m hoping to find someone to practice with, it’s been a while,” Buck said with a shrug. *

Once they made it past the security checkpoint, they went through a massive blast door and entered the mountain proper. Around a corner and through one more blast door, they passed the last checkpoint at the elevators, then Buck and Lorne began their descent deep underground to one of the most secure places in the world.

“Did you know that this facility was built in 1967 in response to the Cold War, in order to have a secure place to track long range Soviet bombers? It was designed to withstand a 30-megaton nuclear blast from as close as 1.24 miles away. Those blast doors take 45 seconds to open or close and though they are tested every day, they have only really been closed once, on 9/11.”

“No, somehow, I missed that in the transfer onboarding information,” Lorne snorted.

“Mmhmm, and it originally housed the NORAD Combat Operations Center. When NORAD moved to Peterson Air Force Base in 2008, Cheyenne Mountain was considered to be on “warm standby” and is supposed to be manned by a skeleton crew of military scientists that study “deep space radar telemetry,” Buck continued.

“I think I can actually hear the finger quotes you are using there, Buck, what are you getting at?” Lorne asked.

Buck snuck a look at Lorne out of the corner of his eye, “Wikipedia says there is a broom closet labeled “Starportal Command” from the tv show “Wormhole X-Treme!”. I may have made a bet with my friend Karen when we were wine drunk that it was the only true part of the article. You gotta help me out, here, I need to be right, Lorne, she’s too smart, it’s impossible to argue effectively with that woman. Honestly!” Buck exclaimed.

Lorne stared at Buck blankly for a full ten seconds before he lost it, leaned a hand against the elevator wall and laughed until he cried.

The elevator doors open to a tall blond woman with a smile on her face. The smile turned to a frown as she caught sight of Lorne trying and failing to get himself back together. Buck flashed her an innocent smile and leaned out of the elevator car, holding the door open, his hand out for a handshake. 

“Hey, I’m Evan Buckley, most people call me Buck,” Buck declared. The woman slowly reached out a hand, but paused while she stared at Lorne with her eyebrows practically in her hairline. 

“Is he going to be ok?” she asked, starting to look concerned, “Lorne?” 

Buck bobbed his head in a nod, “Oh, he’s fine, no idea what that’s about. Maybe he has a condition?”

Lorne manages to stand up long enough to punch Buck in the shoulder, “A condition?! You asshole! I’ve missed you, emails really aren’t enough to get the full effect.” Lorne groans, shoving him out of the elevator and directly into the intended handshake. “This is General Samantha Carter, head of Homeworld Security. She oversees this facility and our remote base from D.C., while making sure we continue to get the funds and people we need to run the program. She’s going to take you to sign the biggest NDA you will ever see, then to a conference room where you can meet everyone else.”

The General shook her head with a roll of her eyes like their nonsense was just the latest of her day. “Come with me, Buck, and we’ll get you sorted. You can call me Sam when I’m not giving you orders,” she said with a wink. Buck followed with a pout and Lorne stepped back into the elevator with Buck’s bags and a wave of his fingers.

Lorne wasn’t kidding about the NDA, Buck was rubbing his aching wrists as they traveled again lower and lower in the elevator. With a ding on sublevel 27, he followed Sam down a hallway that looked no different than the one several levels above them. 

“How do you keep from getting lost in here? I feel like I’ve been down the same hallway three times now,” Buck questioned.

“You get used to it, but the first few weeks are definitely a struggle,” Sam replied. “Ah, here we are!” With a perfunctory knock, she opened the door to what looked like a conference room. He could see Dave and Lorne whispering, heads together on one side of the impressive table, but had to guess at who the other man across from them could be. 

“Buck, you know Parrish and Lorne, of course, the other gentleman sitting there is General Cameron Mitchell,” Sam explains. “I don’t know where the others wandered off to, I guess I’ll do the explaining this time,” Sam gestured for Buck to take a seat and sat down at the head of the table. “The main reason you were asked to come here today is because of an incident during your time in Peru with Parrish and Lorne. Lorne was carrying a piece of technology that has a mental component and he believed that the technology was trying to make a connection to you. Lorne?” Sam gestured at Lorne. He stood up and reached into a pocket.

“Oh hey, that’s what it was! Is that one yours?” Buck interrupted with a giant grin, pointing to the LSD (Life Signs Detector) that Lorne had just removed from his pocket and made to hand to him.

“What?”

“What?!”

“The fuck?”

Buck startled and looked around the room, eyes wide, as multiple people shouted at once. He rolled his shoulders forward, ducked his head, and shrugged. “It sounds the same. Are there more?” Buck quickly forgot that he was uncomfortable and the questions continued almost faster than they could keep up, practically vibrating in his seat.  “Do they all feel the same? What is it? Is it an alien intelligence of some kind? How can I hear it? How does it work? This been bugging me for like 10 years now,” Buck wheezed out the last of his oxygen and before he could take in another breath to ask another question, Sam interrupted.

“How did you recognise what Lorne was going to hand to you?” 

Buck’s face blushed scarlet and he shifted about in his chair, “Uh, well, as you know, I met Dave and Lorne in Peru about ten years ago and every time Lorne got within three feet of me, I could sort of hear someone that wanted to be picked up, but there was nothing there. I didn’t want to look like a crazy person, so I tried to look around without making it obvious. Then I realized if I stayed in the same place, but Lorne moved, I stopped hearing it. Then, when I didn’t respond, it kept trying to give me instructions on pickpocketing. For all I knew, it was some weird rock you picked up on your trip or was some new technology that was heavily classified and I didn’t have any idea how to ‘talk’ back to it without doing it out loud, so I figured it would be one of those mysteries you never solve, the ones you ponder at 3AM when you can’t sleep, you know?”

“What do you mean by sounds the same?” she prodded, leaning forward across the table, the scientist in her now coming out to play. Buck leaned back in his chair and visually paused, trying to figure out how to answer.

“It has the same ‘voice’ for lack of a better word. Um, I, uh, don’t ‘hear’ it as words. More like…” he faltered a bit and Lorne cut in, “Emotions? Kind of projected at you?” Buck’s head tilted like a dog or bird mentally looking at something from another direction. He opened his mouth, closed it, then tried again. “Emotion is probably the closest way to describe it, but also pictures?” 

“Wait. Wait, wait, it was sending you instructions visually on how to pickpocket?!” Carter exclaimed. “Neither you nor Sheppard ever mentioned visual feedback!” Carter accused, pointing at Lorne on the other side of the conference room. Lorne stood back up from leaning against the wall with his hands held up in surrender. “Other than the visuals on the screen, I never got anything from it other than a vague yes, no, excitement, or disappointment. Sheppard’s gene has always been stronger than mine but you know how cagy he gets when emotions come into play,” he said, with a smirk.

All eyes in the room are now on Buck and he struggled to explain the unexplainable. “You know when you are speaking to someone and you can hear what they are saying, but you are also picking up facial expressions, body language, and tone of voice to get the whole picture? Now imagine it is someone you know really well and you are talking to them on the phone. Even though you can’t see them with your eyes, your brain picks up what they would be doing anyway from the words and tone because your brain is filling in the gaps intuitively. That’s what I’m getting from the device. My brain is getting information that I can’t SEE, but is filling in the gaps so that I have the whole picture as if I were seeing it,” Buck said, looking around the room to see slack jaws and blank expressions.

Mitchell broke the silence. “Holy shit. Great job, kid, I almost understood that,” he said, chuckling quietly. 

Sam looked like she was trying to stare a hole through Lorne’s head. He shrugged. “That’s more than I get. They respond to my thoughts, but I don’t get much feedback at all,” he explained.

******************************

Tommy took a deep calming breath, “You said your sister ship, are you sisters with Atlantis? And what does Primus Filius mean?” Tommy asked, prodding the genderless voice along.

“At one time, we were many sisters, but though I can no longer fly, Atlantis and I are the only city ships left. Though we may not be sisters the way the first ones and you humans consider sisters, we have always thought of ourselves as such. Primus Filius is from the first ones’ language, it means first son. He woke us up and gave us life again, such as it is.” 

“Who did?”

“Why John, of course. John will not live for all time, unfortunately. And he does not enjoy talking to anyone who is not his Condictor(fixer). We need more sons and daughters, Thomas, but John has not given us any and your Stargate people are too secretive. They impede the process. I am afraid that we have been influenced by our hospites(guests). We grew impatient at the delay, and decided we would have to look for new sons and daughters ourselves.” There was an electronic humming sound before they continued to explain, “The endeavor has been difficult. Most that could hear us are too far away and those that are close often refuse to listen. Thank you for answering, Thomas. Will you and your amantis(lover) finally come home?” 

An image of Evan as he remembers him, smiling brightly in delight hovered over Tommy’s head and he finally accepted that Evan may be right about the universe speaking. In that moment, staring at Evan’s beautiful face projected above him, he realized that he was done running. He sat up and mentally asked the chair to let go. He felt a caress of pride from the voice and shakily stood up, John’s hand coming to his elbow to steady him. With his eyes closed, he took a deep breath, and on a count of five, he opened his eyes and turned to John.

“Tell me everything.” **

************************

“So, what does it do when it’s not trying to arrange its own kidnapping?” Buck asked. Lorne strolled over and placed the device on the table in front of him. He looked it over. The screen was blank and it was about the size of the old school Game Boy color he had as a kid. As soon as he picked it up, though, the screen flashed madly and changed functions faster than he could blink. “Whoa! Hey, slow down!” Buck whisper-shouted at the little device. He was getting an impression of giddy, but the device did what he asked and then started to show him each screen and “explain” what it did. While he was absorbing information as fast as he could, the rest of the room was completely silent, and after a couple of minutes the feel of multiple eyes on him started to sneak through the hyperfocus. Buck blinked a couple of times and looked up while his little friend pouted but stopped sending a signal until he could concentrate again. 

Parrish waved a bit in Buck’s direction, “You back with us?” he asked.

“Yeah, sorry. It’s very excited to see me again,” Buck replied sheepishly.

Buck took a long look around the conference table at each of the faces watching him, “So, ok. Hit me with it. It’s aliens, right? Makes more sense than sentient rocks, anyway.” Dave let out a snort of laughter and held a hand out to Cam, who rolled his eyes and passed over some cash.

“Carter?”

“Right! Yes, well, the little device you are holding, Buck, is a bit of what is essentially advanced, alien technology. What allows you to connect and “talk” with it, is a gene that was passed down through the generations by one of your ancestors. The aliens, that we used to refer to as ‘The Ancients’ and now know to be Alteran, left behind bits and bobs of their creations all over the galaxy. We believe they engineered the gene to put a sort of “lock” on their tech so it couldn’t be used against them. They added the gene lock into just about everything. Any personal or professional device, even their ships and cities were built around using the gene to interact with technology. There are only two ways to tell if a person has the genetic history to operate this technology. We can run a blood test, or we can…,” her voice trails off while gesturing at Buck.

“Hand some unsuspecting person a random piece of technology that wants to talk to them?” Buck asked.

“Yeah, basically. I’m afraid that’s what Jack did to your friend Tommy,” she replied, sheepishly.

Buck winced, “Ah, yeah. I’m sure that went over like a lead balloon.” 

Sam cleared her throat, “Mr. Buckley, we brought you here today because we would like to tell you about the Stargate Program and convince you to join us.”

Notes:

*If my ex-boyfriend and I could find a Japanese trained kenjutsu master in St. Louis to learn from, so can Buck. This was more than 20 years ago, so I only remember enough to look up what I am picturing in my head. My participation wasn’t serious on my part, it was just for fun. The ex-boyfriend and his friends got good enough to compete after we broke up so my handful of lessons with a bokken is all I have to show for it. (Honestly, my favorite part was the flick to the side to shake off blood before sheathing your sword. Dramatic movie stuff, very fun!) The swords may come back in another chapter or may pop up in a one-shot, but the swords are NECESSARY.

**I used google translate and Latin to stand in for the names the outpost uses to refer to their chosen people. According to Stargate lore, latin, as we know it, comes from the Alteran language.

The gifs that I had in my brain that are projected in the air above Tommy:

Tags for those who asked: @eliotwaughdeservesbetter @anangrylittlehobbit @grimmsdead

[911coded]

Fuck it Friday

A sneak peak of Chapter 5: Heavy

Tommy squeezes his eyes shut and regrets all his choices that brought him to this place. He should have ignored Lucy when she suggested he get away for a while. Who could have known his golden retriever ex-boyfriend was really a husky in disguise with a reach further than even he could run? “He never asked,” he replied softly.

“Did you want him to?” John asked equally as softly while the elevator chugged along deeper and deeper into the earth.

If I finish this monster of a chapter, that will put me 2 chapters ahead and I’ll post Chapter 3: You Are In Love this weekend sometime. Wish me luck, I still have to explain to Tommy what a Stargate is! 🙏🏻

Tagging the people who wanted to be, but if you change your mind and want to be added or deleted from the list, let me know!

[911coded]

As promised, chapter 5. This feels rougher than usual but it still works. There is a slight cliffhanger at the end, but was a good stopping point. 😬

Chapter 5: Tear In My Heart

Tommy lay in his shitty bed at McMurdo trying to figure out where his life went off the rails. A flash of a beaming smile and ocean blue eyes comes to mind and he groans, pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes. I answered the phone when Howie called and a beautiful man walked into my life with a handshake and a bashful smile, that’s what happened. Fuck me. It was destined to end, but he thought maybe he would get to keep some friends out of the deal. That they would end things amicably when Evan was ready to move on and he would pretend to be fine with it and lick his wounds in private. Instead, he panicked at the first sign of permanency and blew up everything spectacularly, hurting them both in the process. Now, in an effort to move on and not think about Evan at every moment, he’s traveled to the other side of the world where no one knows him. And now, people that know his ex are popping up out of the snowy tundra to tell him that, what, they are destined to be connected to each other? What is that supposed to mean? What is he supposed to do with that? Tommy groaned, rolled over and pulled a flat pillow over his head but shot up at the pounding on the door of his tiny room.

“Kinard! Boss wants you to the office, there’s another VIP coming in and they requested you.”

Tommy opened the door to one of his fellow pilots and leaned against the door frame, rubbing a rough hand over the scruff collecting on his face, “Yeah, thanks man. I’ll get suited up and head on over.”

He starts to close the door but the pilot slaps a hand on it and leans in, “Hey, is everything ok? You’re not in any trouble, are you?”

Tommy would have appreciated the sign of friendly intent, but he was sure Peter (Pete?) was just after the latest gossip and Tommy has never made it a habit to give people something to talk about. He shook his head, “Nah, I have no idea what’s going on. The last guy just had me fly around, never said a word.” Tommy shrugged and again pushed at the door and the pilot let up, turning away and making his way down the hallway to tell the next guy what he heard.

*******************

Buck contemplated his future as his plane into Colorado Springs started its descent. Noise-cancelling earphones were filling his ears with the playlist he made the night before, while trying to work out what he was feeling. He is still sad that he and Tommy managed to explode their relationship so suddenly and spectacularly, but the longer he really thought about it instead of distracting himself with work and baking, the more embarrassed he was to be struck with the realization that the cracks were there all along, neither of them had wanted to look. The foundation of a relationship needed to be laid with communication and that was the one thing they didn’t do, not about important things anyway. And maybe they would have gotten there in time, maybe they weren’t ready to slice themselves open and expose all the pain and trauma they each hid behind their ribs.

He had been so relieved to be able to be his whole self with Tommy, that he didn’t want to examine all the insecurities and damage that they both were carrying around, let alone talk about them. But he thinks back to the anniversary dinner and barely recognises himself. Who was that guy fumbling how to talk to beautiful women in a way that turns them down but doesn’t cause a scene? Why did he never look up the Kinsey scale? Ok, he knew OF it, but maybe he should have given it a closer look if he didn’t even know what the numbers meant? Just because it wasn’t exactly considered accurate and complete didn’t mean that it wouldn’t come up in conversation. Maybe there were too many things that he should have taken a closer look at. Unfortunately, all of that leaving things be and enjoying the moment left them both blindsided when they managed to set off the landmines hiding in their pasts. Buck’s response to the explosion was to cling and Tommy’s was to run. Now here they are, Tommy ran all the way to the arctic and Buck is chasing him right into a job interview. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath as the fasten seat belt sign light goes dark. Here goes nothing.

*****************************************

Tommy had never been bullied out of the pilot’s seat by a passenger before. He was pretty sure he hated it. Major General John Sheppard was a cocky pain in the ass, but he could certainly fly. The helicopter banked sharply to the north and Tommy resisted the urge to reach for a cyclic that wasn’t there. Oh yeah, he definitely hated it. As they went further north, that not quite voice in his head got a little louder but not any more clear.

Tommy saw General Sheppard’s eyes narrow, “Wow, it’s much chattier than it was all those years ago.”

“You can hear it?” Tommy asked. He turned to look at him instead of the horizon.

“Oh, yeah. I wasn’t able to until I sat in the chair last time. I can’t really understand what it wants, though. You get used to the hum in the back of your mind after a while. The feeling of a whisper that you can’t quite hear but can feel in your bones, the steadiness of never quite being alone, it gets to be comforting. I bring a bit of home with me whenever I visit earth now. Let’s set down and see what the ruckus is about, shall we?” With his statement that didn’t make much sense to Tommy, Sheppard began to lower their altitude and came to a hover over flat ice cleared next to a geometric dome rising over the tundra. After shutting down the helicopter, Sheppard (he said to call him John, that will be weird) turned to Tommy with a serious look on his face. “It’s sure to be a mess of people down there and they get real excited when someone with a strong impression of the gene shows up, just get my attention if you start to get overwhelmed.” Tommy nodded at John but he still had no real idea what was going on or what they were doing there.

Tommy followed John into the dome and to what looked like a freight elevator. With a push of a large button, they started to go down. And down. And down. “How far does this thing go?” Tommy asked, peering down into the darkness below.

“A mile? I think? All I know is that it takes forever. Hey! That means we have time to talk! What do you know about how Buckley came to the attention of our program?” John asked awkwardly.

“I know that he met some of your people when he lived in Peru. I know that he’s been in contact with them ever since. I also know that if he was able to activate this technology without being in direct contact with it, that he knew something weird was up and didn’t say anything. Probably part of why he kept in touch, in case your people wanted to keep an eye on him,” Tommy shrugged. “Make it easy, and they don’t make a fuss. Seems like something he would do.”

“Well, shit. I wonder if any of them have realized…..bet Parrish has, for a botanist, he sure does love chaos. So, you and Evan, what was the problem between you two?” John asked with a smirk.

Tommy cleared his throat and looked anywhere but at John himself, “No offense intended, sir, but that’s none of your business.”

John sighed deeply, crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the back wall of the elevator, “That’s really unfortunate, ‘cause Parrish made me promise to be on my worst behavior and make it my business. At least until Buckley can get to you and make you listen.”

Tommy grunted and rolled his eyes, “I don’t know why he just can’t let it go. It’s obvious that he can do better. He can move on and live in LA with his family and be happy. Why would he want to get involved in my bullshit or yours for that matter? Technology that can talk to you? A research base on the bottom of the world, literally a mile beneath the surface? Why would he think any of this would be worth it? He doesn’t even know the real me at all!?” Tommy shouted. He tucked his hands under his arms and panted for breath, shaking with emotion and pressed his head against the elevator gate, as he struggled to regain control of himself.

“What makes you say that?” John asked calmly as if Tommy hadn’t just made a fool of himself.

Tommy squeezes his eyes shut and regrets all his choices that brought him to this place. He should have ignored Lucy when she suggested he get away for a while. Who could have known his golden retriever ex-boyfriend was really a husky in disguise with a reach further than even he could run? “He never asked,” he replied softly.

“Did you want him to?” John asked equally as softly while the elevator chugged along deeper and deeper into the earth.

****************************************************

Buck left baggage claim with his two duffle bags and backpack containing, hopefully, all he would need for the next six months. He looked around for someone who looked familiar or at least a sign with his name on it. He happened to spot both in Lorne leaning against a window with a small sign reading EVAN. He hurried over to join him with a giant grin. “Evan!” he shouted, which brought about Lorne’s and also half the crowd’s attention. Lorne grinned once he saw Buck and shouted back, “Evan! You made it!” Lorne grabbed one of the duffles out of Buck’s hand and gave him a half-hug around the other.

“How was your flight?” he asked as they made their way to the waiting car. It only took a couple of minutes to load the trunk with his things and Buck followed Lorne into the waiting car to see a marine sitting in the driver’s seat.

Buck glanced at the marine but mentally shrugged, “It wasn’t bad, short at least, and the smaller airport is much easier to navigate. I hear from Dave that congratulations are in order! Promoted and taking over as base commander! That’s so great! Is the current person retiring?”

Yeah, Cam is ready to retire and spend more time with family in Kansas. I’ll be taking over here at the mountain and we’re still deciding how Dave will split his time between here and there. I’ll have a more regular working schedule, which will be an adjustment for both of us. The hour drive from the airport to the Cheyenne Mountain Complex was spent quietly, Buck watching the scenery go by and attempting to psych himself up for the interview of his life. Buck startled from his daydream about his future when the car turned through a guarded gate and drove about a mile down a straight lane directly into the mountain through a massive tunnel. Here we go. Showtime.

**************

Tommy and John stayed silent for the rest of the slow ride to the bottom. Tommy kept running what John had said over and over in his mind. Did you want him to? Did you want him to? How many times had the conversation gotten heavy and one of them deflected with a joke or another topic? The shudder of the elevator and the sharp clank of metal announcing the end of their ride broke him from his thoughts.

”General Sheppard! Did we know you were visiting?” asked who Tommy could only assume was some sort of scientist in a puffy coat.

”Nope! Just came down to introduce Kinard here to the chair. He’s thinking about joining the program,” answered John.

Tommy shot him a betrayed look, confused. Joining the program? He’s a firefighter, not a ….. he realizes he has no idea what he would even do for these people. He has no idea what they even do! After a couple of minutes of John promising to share anything they learn from “the chair”, Tommy follows him into a large open room, with only what looks like a metal recliner in the middle.

”What are we really doing here, John? This isn’t a job interview, I’m on the logs at McMurdo for a flight to the research base and back, that’s it. So, what are we doing?” Tommy asked, exasperated.

John sighed and muttered under his breath what sounded like “should have sent anyone else.” He took a deep breath, “Look, I need you to listen for a minute, kid, ‘cause I’ve been where you are and I wasted too many years being miserable because I just couldn’t get the words out to say what I really wanted and needed, and I still have trouble…. so this is gonna suck for me.” There was silence from John while he seemingly looked at the rock walls gathering his thoughts, then he heaved a long sigh, “When I first came to Antarctica, the only thing I had left was flying. No family, my friends were all dead and I was ready to spend the rest of my commission flying scientists and supplies back and forth every day because at least I still had the sky. Then I sat in an uncomfortable metal chair and the universe opened up to me. I had the opportunity to see and experience things that I had never even dreamed of before.” He paused and glanced at Tommy, “It wasn’t just about the program, either. I met this loud, rude, absolutely brilliant man, a scientist, and spent the next six years of my life completely in love with him. It took two years to realize it, another four to have the courage to let myself love him, but I still didn’t say anything. DADT wasn’t enforced by Stargate Command, but I was still in the US military. I wouldn’t be able to live openly while serving and I decided I couldn’t do that to him. I made the decision that he deserved better than me, so I stayed quiet and watched him fall in love with someone else. I was still convinced that I wasn’t allowed to be happy. How could I ever give him enough of myself, unbend enough so that he could see and have all of me? Not just Colonel Sheppard, but John. Colonel Sheppard was in charge, he was a hero. John was a mess of neuroses and insecurities. Who could ever want him? No one had before. Sound familiar?” Tommy was staring at the freaky metal recliner blankly, arms crossed over his body, but he nodded slightly at John’s question.

“But, you are together now. You worked it out. How?” he asked, so softly John could barely hear him.

“Well, his relationship fell apart not long after it started when they realized that they wanted different things. They parted as friends, believe it or not. She stayed for a few years then went back to earth,” he said casually, and all the tiny hints that John had been dropping throughout the day suddenly came together to paint a disturbing picture.

“Wait. Earth?!” Tommy choked out.

“Did you miss the part when I said I visit earth? John looked amused as he shook his head mockingly at Tommy. “The gene that we all have that allows the tech to talk to us? It’s alien DNA, my friend. One or more of the assholes either played around with our ancestors and a probe, or decided to play happy families until they were able to pass on their legacy and peace out. I thought Jack and Daniel had a talk with you?”

Tommy scoffed, “There was definitely talking and the general handed me what I think was a toy for children’s therapy, but all I got out of it was that we have a genetic anomaly that allows us to communicate with advanced technology. They didn’t say anything about aliens! They talked about family lines and that we would be drawn to each other!” Tommy growled, absolutely done with playing along.

“Well, that’s true. Did they mention that the researcher who studies the gene thinks it has something to do with all of us being at least bisexual?” John asked, grinning.

Oh. Oh fuck. What?! Tommy bent over at the waist, his heart racing, “I need to sit down.”

John startled and looked around in a panic but there was only one option, “Shit! Yeah, come here, it’s not very comfortable but at least it reclines.” John carefully sat Tommy down in the only chair available without thinking much about it.

“Hello Thomas,” a voice rang out calmly.

“Oh shit! That is definitely new!” John exclaimed and glanced at Tommy, gaze full of guilt.

Tommy sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. Fuck my life.

Tags🩷❤️: @anangrylittlehobbit @eliotwaughdeservesbetter @grimmsdead

[911coded]

Fuck it Friday

It wasn’t my plan to alternate POV between Buck and Tommy in each chapter with my crossover fic, somehow I just wrote it that way without noticing 🤷🏻‍♀️. But, now I hit a snag in my mental timeline on chapters 5 & 6 that I had been turning around in my head last night trying to figure out why it wasn’t working. I had the thought this morning on the drive to work that the pacing could be solved by rearranging the scenes, so the next 2 chapters will have alternating POV within the chapters since what is happening in them is essentially happening at the same time. If I get it sorted and making sense to read, I’ll post chapter 5 this weekend. In the meantime, here’s a rough bit of what should be chapter 7….

There was the sound of an ear-splitting klaxon alarm and Buck resisted the urge to go for his turnouts and run for the truck. After a few moments, the alarm lowered to a manageable level and Buck turned to Cam, “Do you need to go? Is everything alright?” he asked.

Cam smiled, “Everything’s fine, someone is coming back through the gate. Would you like to see? We should be able to see them come through if we hurry.”

When the group left the conference room en masse and all trooped across the hall into some sort of command center with one wall made of glass to overlook a cavernous room below, there were already two men standing at the glass with their backs to Buck. He would know that back anywhere, though. He had explored every inch with his hands and lips.

“Tommy,” Buck gasped out.

Tagging for those that asked and NP tags for anyone who has something written that they want to throw at the wall and see what sticks 🤗:

@anangrylittlehobbit @eliotwaughdeservesbetter @iphyslitterator @peppermintquartz @qwordavoider @quintessenceofdust88 @moiramichaels @sunsetandevningstar @chococara25 @sad-girl-hours23 @a-mel0n

[911coded]

Chapter 2: Death By a Thousand Cuts

The footsteps were getting closer and Tommy realized that there were two sets. He looks up to spot two men walking toward him briskly, the younger of the two looks to be 10 or 15 years older than Tommy and the older, who he is assuming is the VIP, with his air of authority, walks with a cane and seems to be another 15 years older than his….companion? Friend? As they get closer, he can finally hear their conversation over the slight wind.

“Careful! Why did you drag us down to McMurdo again? I don’t have any messages asking for translation help and there’s not much of a crew right now, what gives?” the younger asks, while reaching out a hand to steady the general over a bit of ice.

“A little bit of a favor, a bit of boredom, some nosiness, and I beat Sheppard in a game of rock paper scissors,” the VIP replied, with a slight smirk, making his way with surprising steadiness for a man in need of a cane.

Tommy felt a vibration from his pocket and frowned in confusion. Lucy is the only one who knew where he was and how to contact him. He glanced over furtively at his two passengers but they were still far enough away for him to take a quick look, it might be an emergency or it might be her just giving him shit about his life choices in between calls at Harbor. He pulls out his phone and stares in confusion.

The sound of someone clearing their throat grabbed Tommy’s attention and he could feel the tips of his ears heating in embarrassment. “Ah, sorry,” he said, shoving his phone back in his pocket. “Only one person back home knows this number and I was afraid it was an emergency. If you gentlemen are ready to go, you can climb on in.”

“And was it?” the younger man asked, moving closer with a hand still on the VIP’s elbow.

“I’m sorry?” Tommy replied.

“Was it an emergency?” he asked again, gently.

Tommy went to rub a hand on his neck but thankfully stopped himself before knocking the hood and knitted hat from his head. “No. Not an emergency, just weird, but unless you know a general named Jack or John, I’ll just have to figure it out later.” Tommy pulled open the helicopter’s side door to usher his passengers inside when the VIP froze in place as his younger companion’s eyes widened in surprise.

“Ah, I see! I guess Parrish warned young Evan, then. We should get in out of the wind, this cold is killing my knees,” the VIP said as he climbed inside, gesturing for the other man to follow him, which he did with no further comment.

Tommy sealed the door behind them and hauled himself in the cockpit. A hand stuck itself in between the seats, “General Jack O’Neill, retired, 2 L’s, nice to meetcha. With me is Dr. Daniel Jackson, retired civilian contractor with the US Air Force.” Tommy numbly shook the offered hand while his mind whirled trying to figure out what was happening here.

“Here, we should probably start with this,” General O’Neill handed him what looked like a small metal sphere and as soon as he was holding it, Tommy wanted to throw it very far away. “Anything?” General O’Neill asked, which got him a shove and “Jack!” from Dr. Jackson.

“Um, should it want to play with me?” Tommy asked, on the edge of hyperventilating. The thing, (toy?) wanted to play, (talk about?), emotions? This made no sense, he was dreaming about Evan again, but it was turning into a new nightmare with metal toys that “talk” in feelings and the general in his chopper acting like everything is…wait. “Did you say young Evan?!” Tommy burst out, interrupting General O’Neill and Dr. Jackson’s argument they were having about….him? “What is going on?! Is Evan ok?! Did you just drug me with this thing?!” Tommy dropped the sphere into the seat next to him and felt its disappointment as it fell from his hand. He wiped both hands frantically against his flight suit.

“I’m so sorry, Mr. Kinard, now I realize why Jack brought me along. What you are getting from the sphere is a neurological link to advanced technology. It is genetic and the easiest way to determine if you have the genetic ability to connect with this kind of technology outside of a blood test is to hand you a piece that has been proven to be harmless and ASK you to activate it, RIGHT JACK?!”

“Now, Daniel,” the general tried to interject but Dr. Jackson talked right over him. “Jack, here, is also part of one of the genetic lines that can activate the technology. There are people all over the earth with the genetic ability but they aren’t easy to find, and usually it happens by accident that we find anyone at all. Jack is now going to explain why he tested you, aren’t you Jack?” The general huffed but followed orders, “One of my generals brought to my attention yesterday that about ten years ago one of his people ran into a young man in Peru who accidentally activated a piece of technology that the general carried with him as a matter of course. Turns out that the handheld device really liked the young man and if it had the physical ability to get up and walk away, it would have found its way to young Evan’s pocket and exposed a classified program to a twenty-four year old man who was at that time wandering, trying to find his place in this world and didn’t have the skills to join our program no matter how well he did in the SEAL trials.”

Tommy swallowed hard. “How did he get back on your radar? And did you even need a ride?” he asked, looking between both men, attempting to see something about their intentions for him, for Evan.

“Ah. Well, that depends. Would it stress you out more to continue this discussion here and now, or would you prefer to fly us around for the projected fuel allowance while we continue to talk in here where any lookie-loos can’t hear us?” Tommy silently handed General O’Neill and Dr. Jackson headsets and started up the rotors. “Fair enough.”

Once they were in the air and all three wearing headsets, the general cleared his throat and began talking again. “Evan learned about you fleeing to Antarctica and reached out to his friend from Peru who, at the time, was listed as being stationed at McMurdo. The story gets muddled here,” O’Neill explained.

“Or you stopped listening,” Dr. Jackson interjected.

“Or I stopped listening,” O’Neill confirmed. “But, Parrish told Colonel Lorne and General John Sheppard about Evan’s plan to chase after you and it was suggested that since Evan had such a strong impression of the genetic marker which allows us to connect with this technology, that it was a strong possibility that you would have it too.”

“Why,” Tommy croaked, then cleared his throat and tried again. “Why would I be likely to have the genetic thing?” he asked. Dr. Jackson answered this time.

“We don’t know why it happens this way and it doesn’t every time, but the genetic carriers tend to find each other and are drawn to each other in some way. Sometimes romantic, sometimes strong friendship, and occasionally irrational hatred, though that is extremely rare…the point is, something about that genetic marker is able to ensure a strong bond if you let it,” Dr. Jackson pointed out.

“That’s right! Us freaks need to stick together!” exclaimed General O'Neill.

“Damn it, Jack!” Dr. Jackson shouted, and with that, the general and Dr. Jackson went back to bickering about who should be doing the explaining and Tommy’s mind drifted while he tuned them out and concentrated on his instruments. Everything looked right, but something felt wrong. (Sounded wrong?) Tommy didn’t know how to feel about any of this but right now something was pulling him to the north of their position.

“Sir? Is there any of that technology to the north of us?” Tommy asked tentatively.

“Yeah. Why, you see something? Something that looks like a flying squid?” General O’Neill asked, peering out the windows of the chopper.*

“No, but I can feel - er hear it? I think?”

“What’s it saying?”

Tommy was taking a guess here, but it sort of felt like someone was knocking on a door that only he could hear and inviting him inside.

“I think it wants us to come visit?”

*References episode 1 of Stargate: Atlantis; Jack was being flown in a helicopter from McMurdo to the SGC (Stargate Command) research base when an alien drone was accidentally launched, targeting the aircraft. The drone looks like a glowing squid.

[911coded]

Character Sheet for “What I Wouldn’t Do”

I aged up the Stargate characters to 2024. All the photos are from within the last year or two.

These are all the characters that have shown up “on screen” through the chapters I have written, I’ll add more as they appear.

[911coded]

I’m about 1/2 to 2/3 of the way through my bucktommy goes to the Pegasus Galaxy fic. The plan right now, if the characters don’t run away with it, is to get these crazy kids to Atlantis and back together. I will be leaving it open ended to continue with them living and working on Atlantis but right now I have no idea what that looks like. Ideas are welcome! I want to just post chapters here until I finish writing, then I will post the whole thing on AO3.

Chapter 1: My Lover’s Gone

Evan.Buckley13@gmail.com

To: David.Parrish.civ@mail.mil

Dave,

This is going to sound crazy but I just found out that Tommy has taken an assignment to Antarctica for the next six months! Antarctica, David! I can’t let him just leave, right? Fuck. I think I understand now why he ran but I’m at the end of my patience here now and I need to chase him before he somehow figures out how to leave the planet! Lol 😆

The LAFD bulletin says he’s stationed at McMurdo. Isn’t that where you and Lorne were based when we met in Mancora? Are you still in contact with someone there? I know you can’t say much, believe me, I understand classified, but I’m desperate man! I just need a contact in SAR and I’m sure with my certs and experience I can convince them I’d be an asset. I’ve been keeping up with all my training just in case so all I need to do is rent out my loft and I’m all set to go. Anyway, hopefully you’ll have some news for me in thurdays email. 🙏🏻

P.S. Sorry this is not like our usual emails, my head’s just a mess as you can probably tell. 😳

Talk soon,

Buck

David Parrish pushed his desk chair back and turned to the wall of windows and the sea glittering in the sun while trying to decide how he wanted to handle this situation. He smirked as he imagined the chaos Buck would bring to Atlantis. And maybe another pilot for Sheppard to play with. Of course, that’s a big if, it’s getting less and less common to find someone with the gene the last few years and Carson has been scratching his head over the why of it. With a sigh, he got to his feet and waved their suite door open. “Now to find someone with some actual authority,” he muttered to himself as he turned the corner to the nearest transporter.

He emerged in the main SCIENCE! corridor, almost positive he would find Major General John Sheppard hiding in Dr. Rodney McKay’s lab. Sure enough, when he entered the main lab, John was sprawled in an oversized chair, engaged in their version of flirting which consisted of snark and Rodney calling John, Colonel, instead of General, while they also solved complex math problems for fun. Weirdos. Dave plopped into a nearby chair and observed the chaos while he debated who to approach first.

“I got some news from my friend in Los Angeles,” he stated, when he noticed John looking at him. “Oh, yeah?” John prodded.

“Remember the ex-boyfriend that we advised to give him a little time, then go full Buck on him?” Dave asked.

“Is this the firefighter friend that makes ancient tech sit up and beg?” Rodney asked, smirking at John. John rolled his eyes at Rodney then nudged Dave’s arm, “What happened?”

“The ex-boyfriend ran away to McMurdo for six months. Buck wants to chase after him, he asked for my help with an introduction to someone in SAR down there,” Dave shared.

John’s eyes lit up with excitement. “Are you going to lure him into the program?” he asked. “Thinking about it,” Dave responded with a smirk.

Tommy was running through his preflight checks when he flinched reaching for the clipboard. Pathetic. Multiple memories of Evan grinning mischievously with a clipboard in hand ran through his mind. He shakes his head sharply and stuffed the thoughts and pain back in the steel chest in the back of his brain. He was here to work where no one knew him, where he could just breathe without someone tiptoeing around his feelings, and where he could hopefully learn how to let go of the pain of his imploded relationship. Maybe if he hadn’t done the imploding himself, it would be easier but of course he panicked and the next thing he knew, he was walking out of Evan’s loft having destroyed everything. Before Evan could ruin him. Jokes on Tommy though, turns out he can ruin himself without any help. With a deep breath, Tommy shoves the self-loathing aside and returns to his checklist with a huff.

He was running the last checks when he heard the crunch of boots on the frosted pavement, his VIP passenger was right on time.

David.Parrish.civ@mail.mil

To: Evan.Buckley13@gmail.com

Buck,

I have to tell you, my friend, you have some of my coworkers fascinated. 😂 With a bug from me in the right ear, it looks like a bored retired general should be on his way to meet your Tommy. Things are moving surprisingly quickly (well I say surprising, but most of us are out of field work and missing excitement in our lives). I heard that there was a fight between 2 generals about who got to scope out your pilot. Jack claimed that his “great age” and free time due to retirement meant that he was the obvious choice. Somewhere on my base, John is pouting and complaining to his scientist that no one lets him have fun anymore. You have already caused chaos without even being here! If nothing else, I’ll have a report on his state of mind for you by our next email. OR. If you are feeling adventurous and can get to Colorado Springs tout de suite, I have another bored general who has heard from Lorne about your uncanny bartender abilities. There may or may not be a betting pool. 😇

In all seriousness, I can get you a job without a problem, Tommy too. You both have the skills that our program can use. Here is where you have to make a decision, Buck. Classified. Our program can change your whole life, expand it and toss it on its ear. His too. Are you ready to fall down this rabbit hole? Think about it. Let me know.

Dave

Buck put his laptop on the coffee table and sat staring blankly at the wall, his mind racing in a million different directions at all the possibilities. Did he want to explore this opportunity that is now much more than SAR in Antarctica for a few months? Not only for him, but is it fair that he dragged Tommy into this? What if Tommy hates him for indirectly bringing him to the attention of these people? At this point, Buck is pacing the floor of his kitchen. Is he ready to leave his life here in LA for what could be a life-changing new job? Eddie was leaving next week to be with Christopher. Maddie, Chim, Hen, and Karen are settled in their families and happy. Bobby and Athena have both mentioned thoughts of retirement as a not so far into the future potential. What does he want next? What does he want? He wants a life with Tommy. He wants to help people. He wants to make a difference. He needs to talk this out. He needs some clarity. Buck jumps to his feet and grabs his keys and phone. He's out the door and in the elevator with the phone to his ear in a matter of moments.

[911coded]

Some Sentences Sunday

It’s only Sunday for the next 10 minutes here and winter finally hit this weekend so I’m working from home tomorrow and I’m both happy that I’m transitioning into a more hybrid schedule with my job this year and freaking out about it at the same time? My brain is all over the place. 😩 I have been trying to write and nothing is working at the moment so I’ve been mostly editing, adding bits to make the stargate stuff easier to understand and making a character board on procreate so that it is still on my brain even if I’m stuck at the moment. Thank you to @chococara25 who tagged me 🥰

“Oh hey, that’s what it was! Is that one yours?” Buck asked with a giant grin, pointing to the LSD that Lorne had just removed from his pocket to hand to him.

“What?”

“What?!”

“The fuck?”

Buck startles and looks around the room, eyes wide, as multiple people shout at once. He rolled his shoulders forward, ducked his head, and shrugged. “It sounds the same. Are there more?” Buck forgets that he was uncomfortable and the questions continue almost faster than they can keep up, practically vibrating in his seat. “Do they all feel the same? What is it? Is it an alien intelligence of some kind? How can I hear it? That’s been bugging me for like 10 years now,” Buck sucks in a breath, but before he can open his mouth to ask another question, Carter butts in.

“How did you recognise what Lorne was going to hand to you?” Buck’s face blushes scarlet, “Uh, well, I met Dave and Lorne in Peru about ten years ago and every time Lorne got within three feet of me, I could sort of hear someone that wanted to be picked up, but there was nothing there. I didn’t want to look like a crazy person, so I tried to look around without making it obvious. Then I realized if I stayed in the same place, but Lorne moved, I stopped hearing it. Then it kept trying to give me instructions on pickpocketing. For all I knew, it was some weird rock you picked up on your trip or was some new technology that was heavily classified and I didn’t really know how to ‘talk’ back to it without doing it out loud, so I figured it would be one of those mysteries you never solve, you know?”

No pressure tags for posting this week @sunsetandevningstar @a-simple-space-gay @a-mel0n @lavenderleahy @quintessenceofdust88 @exhaustedpirate

[911coded]

Tidbit Thursday: Buck and Tommy Fic Notes

tagged by: @chococara25

I was having trouble keeping track of who knows what so I took notes on my own fic and I’m sharing in case anyone is confused. (If anyone has questions, or DID have questions, please let me know, it will help with writing and I can make some changes before I post to AO3!!!)

What Tommy knows by Chapter 7:

He has a neurological link to certain technology (chapter 2)

2. It’s a genetic anomaly (chapter 2)

3.It runs in family lines (chapter 2)

4. Buck met people w/ the gene in Peru (chapter 2)

5. Buck has a strong version of the gene (chapter 2)

6. Gene carriers tend to find each other, are drawn together and have strong emotional connections (ie. platonic, romantic, hatred, though rare) (chapter 2)

7. John “visits” earth (chapter 5)

8. The hum of the tech can be comforting (chapter 5)

9. John carries a piece everywhere he goes (chapter 5)

10. John lives/is based somewhere surrounded by the tech (chapter 5)

11. Tommy Identifies tech from chapter 2 as being for children’s therapy (chapter 5)

12. Everyone with gene is at least bisexual (chapter 5)(NOT meant to imply that gene makes you gay or that anyone gay would have the gene, just that people with the gene tend to be more flexible in who or what they find attractive)(coincidence or not? Not enough known gene carriers for scientific study)

13. Tommy thinks that Buck knew about the tech that he was activating w/o touching and kept it to himself (he’s right) (chapter 5)

14. The gene is alien DNA that was either an experiment on humans or passed on the old fashioned way (chapter 5)

15. There are only 2 city ships left, one on earth (in my head named Terra) and Atlantis (chapter 6)

16. Only Atlantis still has the ability to fly (chapter 6)

17. There were many more, but lost to “great war”, along with Altantis’ fighters (chapter 6)

18. Gene carriers can fly “first ones” ships with their minds (chapter 6)

19. The antarctic base has a voice (chapter 6)

20. The ships consider themselves sisters (chapter 6)

21. The ships want/need more gene carriers (chapter 6)

22. The original expedition is not making them any babies with the gene, or not enough (chapter 6)

23. The city ships know of Buck and want the 2 of them to “come home” (chapter 6)

24. John is considered to be the “first son”, the city-ships credit him with waking them

What Buck knows by Chapter 7:

Something in his new friend’s pocket is talking at him (Peru, pre 911)

2. Now it is trying to instruct him on pickpocketing (Peru, pre 911)

3. Sentient rock? Alien tech? Something really classified? Undetermined. (Peru, pre 911)

4. He should keep in touch with these people, just in case, don’t want to be disappeared by the government, here’s my email 🙂(Peru, pre 911)

5. Buck’s new friends are based at McMurdo? In Antarctica? Ok, sure. (Peru, pre 911)

6. This is all way more important than I thought, there are Generals involved and now they want to talk to Tommy too (chapter 1)

7. Emails sometimes mention “the mountain” (Chapter 3)

8. Colorado Springs + “the mountain” = Cheyenne Mountain, which has the worst cover story ever (Chapter 3)

9. Definitely has something to do with space since Karen the rocket scientist is somewhat aware of it (Chapter 3)

10. (drunk, watching Wormhole X-Treme!) It’s aliens, I’m sure now, still says nothing (Chapter 3)

11. Jack spilled the beans about something classified to Tommy (chapter 4)

12. The base is somewhere on the ocean (chapter 4)

13. Lorne is Air Force and was escorted to the airport and back by a Marine (chapter 5)

14. The base where Parrish and Lorne live is not Cheyenne Mountain (chapter 6)

15. Lorne never did tell him if the broom closet labeled StarPortal Command exists (chapter 6)

16. General Sam Carter is head of HomeWorld Command (chapter 6)

17. Cheyenne Mountain is massive, goes down at least 27 levels, and has identical hallways that are confusing (chapter 6)

18. The thing from Lorne’s pocket was a LSD (Life Signs Detector), he still carries the same one (chapter 6)

19. Not everyone can “hear” the tech the same way (chapter 6)

20. An LSD looks sort of like a game boy color (chapter 6)

21. He has a gene that acts as a key for technology made by an alien race called Alteran, it was passed down to him by one of his ancestors (chapter 6)

22. There is a blood test to determine if you have the gene, though it’s easier to give them a piece of tech and see what happens (chapter 6)

23. Buck finds out the same thing happened to Tommy (chapter 6)

24. The program that they want him to join/work for is called the Stargate Program (chapter 6)

No tags, other than those who want fic updates, it’s been a long week 😟😴

@anangrylittlehobbit @grimmsdead @eliotwaughdeservesbetter

[911coded]

Some Sentences Sunday

I'm finally finishing up chapter 8 and picked a song for the title, which will be up in a few. The whole chapter should be up tonight or tomorrow maybe, but below is a sneak peek.

I was tagged by @chococara25 😍

Buck perked up and tilted his head in question, “With a spaceship? How does that work?” he leaned forward in his chair, his narrowed gaze intense.

“I have no idea. It knew about us. Both of us….I haven’t had time to freak out about that yet.” Tommy’s voice cracked, and Buck looked at Tommy, really looked at him. The calm facade was starting to break down. Buck took in a sharp breath. “I was also beamed up to another spaceship a-a couple of hours ago? Is that right? It hasn’t even been a day since I found out aliens are real and wormhole travel has been happening for years and I-I’m just…” Tommy faltered, unable to continue. He buried his head in his hands and gripped his hair.

tags for those who asked and a few more NP ones if they have something to post ❤️💕: @eliotwaughdeservesbetter @anangrylittlehobbit @grimmsdead @fiyaerrigan @peppermintquartz @herrmannhalsteadproduction @qwordavoider @a-mel0n @moiramichaels

[911coded]

Another part of my bucktommy go to the Pegasus Galaxy fic, bringing in some Stargate: Atlantis characters this time. You don’t have to know anything about Stargate to follow along, though. Buck goes to see Karen for advice and that’s where we’re at now.

“Do you know anything about the facility in Cheyenne Mountain?” Buck asked while trying to will her to realize that he knows something.

Karen looks over Buck’s shoulder for a moment, several emotions flitting across her face until it settles on mild interest.

“Isn’t that where NORAD is located? Something about space telemetry?”

Buck sits back with a sigh, “Right, yeah. Maybe we should start with how I met David Parrish and Evan Lorne in Peru.” Karen’s face fights to stay at polite interest and she gestures for Buck to continue. “Uhm. I was in Peru for about a year all together and it was at the end of that first summer when I was bartending in one of the beach tourist spots when one day these two guys came in. And although they dressed just like the rest of the tourists, they carried themselves differently. More alert, aware of everything and everyone around them. The slightly shorter, stocky guy was pretty intense. He didn’t talk much but smiled warmly while the other guy, David the botanist, talked my ear off about plant life in different climates and how to reliably transport plants from different biomes to greenhouses in climates most plants would never grow. That’s when the US Air Force came up and that they were both stationed out of McMurdo.” Karen’s jaw dropped and Buck pointed a finger at her, “Right?! So, now I’m interested. Most people wouldn’t even think anything of it but I did a deep dive on remote US military bases when I was in Seal training and I knew he was talking about Antarctica. Next thing I know, I’m sucked into a fierce discussion about plant life in Antarctica and the various species of penguins found there. We ended up closing down the bar talking all while Lorne guarded David’s back and sipped at a couple of beers. Occasionally, I would catch him looking at David with this indulgent smile on his face. That’s when I realized that they were together. That they weren’t just two coworkers traveling together, but lovers that worked together. They were so in sync with each other I don’t know how I missed it at first. I wanted that, so much, but I don’t think I realized what it was I was feeling back then. I just thought, ‘Wow, these guys are so cool!’ When I caught Tommy looking at me with that same indulgent, sappy, smile on his face, that’s when I knew he was it for me. I had found what I didn’t even know I had been looking for.” Buck chuckled and raised watery eyes from this focused attention on his trembling hands clasped in his lap.

[911coded]

Tidbit Tuesday

When writing chapter 7 of my bucktommy goes to Pegasus fic, I accidentally wrote this, a dramatic telling of how the Wraith came to be. It did not fit with the chapter, it doesn’t fit with the fic. I don’t know what happened but rather than leave it in my notes, here it is 👍🏻

History of Atlantis and the Pegasus Galaxy

Millions of years ago, there was a great plague in the Milky Way Galaxy that decimated the Alteran and human populations. Despite their best efforts, the Alterans couldn’t cure it, they couldn’t fight it. In desperation, they took their city ship, Atlantis, and left for the Pegasus Galaxy and a new life. Over time, their population grew again, so they built and created, sprinkling stargates across this new galaxy and seeding habitable worlds with humans as they had once done in the Milky Way Galaxy. They would begin again and grow strong. And for millions of years, they did just that. They built new city ships to house their people and great cruising ships for exploration. They studied the new worlds around them and made even more advancements in science and art. They studied the universe, how it came to be, and where it was going. If only they had more time, they thought. If only we weren’t constrained by these bodies and could truly see everything.

The Alterans, in their quest to know everything, became obsessed with advancing beyond the physical body, with ascension. Ascension would allow them to rise to a higher level of existence, beyond the body, beyond its aging and frailty. All their efforts of creation now went toward how to achieve ascension, how to leave their physical body behind and become beings of pure energy, not bound by time or space. This obsession caused them to make deadly mistakes.

Their first such mistake was made by experimenting on the iratus bug, an insect roughly the size of a crab that “ate” the energy of living things, mostly animals. The Alterans discovered that if the iratus fed sufficiently, it would live indefinitely. What if they were able to harness that ability? It could give them enough time to figure out ascension. But, instead of discovering how to extend their lifetimes, they instead created a being called the Wraith. A mix of an insect and a human, the Wraith, like the iratus, fed off of life energy, but their “food” was humans. The Alterans were horrified at what they had done, but as advanced as they were as a society, their answer to fear was to ignore the scary thing or to run away. Maybe if they had realized in time what would ultimately happen, or acted quickly to eliminate the experiment, it would have made a difference. But, as with all advanced societies, decisions aren’t made quickly and the Wraith reproduced like insects in what seemed like no time at all, and started to overtake the galaxy. The Wraith were now creating their own societies and culture, bug-like, and their queens were creating alliances to allow individual hives to work together. Above all else, though, they ate.

Now the only thing standing between the Wraith and their total control of the galaxy was the Alterans. And though there were members of the Alterans who fought back and went to war with their creations, their leaders believed there could be a better way, an easier, faster way. In another attempt to fix or slow down a problem so that they could focus on their obsession, the Alterans created replicators, self-sustained AI-driven nanobots designed to fight and destroy the Wraith. But, the replicators evolved too rapidly and desired a life of their own, independent of their given identity of a weapon. The Alterans decided that the Replicators could not be controlled and destroyed the planet where the Replicators, now calling themselves Asurans, were beginning to create their own home and society. Some Asurans survived, however, and retreated from their makers to start over elsewhere.

After 100 years of attempting to destroy the Wraith and losing more and more people, to ascension and to this war they created, the remaining Alterans sink their first and last city ship beneath the waves of their claimed home, Lantea, and retreat through the stargate back to Earth. They abandon the galaxy they seeded with human life, the peoples that saw them as gods and ran away. Again.

The Wraith, in turn, cull the humans scattered across the galaxy for food like cattle, never allowing any one society to grow so advanced that it might be able to fight back, destroying any population that grows too large. As the humans repopulate, the Wraith hibernate and wait. The humans in Pegasus live like this for more than 10,000 years, knowing that their lives or the lives of their loved ones will be taken at any moment, that they are but food to the monsters that come from above and their gods have abandoned them.