#bubble boy x reader

[rdiowx]

PILOT, JIMMY AND DONNIE AUDIOLIST

I just decided to put them all on the same one cause theyre all Jake Gyllenhaal characters

If ur new to these, this is an mlm blog HOWEVER considering the very little amount of m4m audios these are ramblefaps or m4f audios 👍🏽

If these dont work lmk so i can fix em!

—☆

PILOT KELSON (highway)

☆ getting high then fucking ig

☆ i feel like the title on this one is self explanatory

☆ pilot edging himself in his car (ramble fap not an audio)

☆ high edging this time (nother ramble fap)

DONNIE DARKO (donnie darko)

☆ having donnie breed you for funsies idk

☆movie boring fuck instead

☆ reminded me of the deleted scene i posted

☆ ramble fap cuz i love this guy

JIMMY LIVINGSTON (bubble boy)

☆ Pretty forward title tbh

☆ i love jimmy he’s a cutie

☆ as if he would ever have to learn how to be submissive

☆ jimmy “teaching” you guitar

[ak319]

Lovesick bubbly hubby x reader

(artist: ppanae100)

You sighed as another picture popped up on your phone, sent during his so-called "study session" with friends. You’d sent him to study, and this is what he was up to. Mentally, you made a note to confiscate his phone the next time he claimed to go to a "group-study."

So, Narin Gul was indeed your husband. This young, clingy, bratty, bimbo of a man—your husband. You, a college professor. No, not his college professor. You just happened to grow up in the same neighborhood, and the moment you helped him with an essay—something he was initially too shy to ask about but did on his parents' insistence—he fell hopelessly in love. Deeply. He wanted to be yours and you to be his only.

He still couldn’t quite understand how he’d fallen for a Chemistry professor, of all people, since he hated anything related to studying. His parents had to practically beg him to pursue a degree, just for his own good after he’d all but given up on academics. In the end, he chose English, thinking it might be easier—only to now cry over novels, not because of the stories, but because he absolutely despises studying! He just wanted to be whisked away. To stay at home all day and keep himself and the house pretty.

And you, you were everything he ever dreamt of. Like his own knight, a Princess Charming. Sure, you were a bit older, and that only made it all more romantic in his mind. He, a cute and eager English Literature student in his first year, and you, a sophisticated, cold, dashing, and incredibly intelligent Chemistry professor--just the thought of it made his heart flutter. After that first interaction, he practically melted onto the floor when he returned to his room, unable to believe that you were the same (Y/N) who used to play on the streets with your friends. He, a kid at the time, would watch from the sidelines, sometimes joining in, and then you had disappeared for years to get your degree. And now you were back--thank God, you were back--and more dreamy than ever.

From that day forward, he started paying more attention to his English studies. Well, at least trying. He’d read poetry or skim through the synopsis of novels he hadn’t actually touched, hoping to impress you with a few lines memorized just for you. His bimboy brain, of course, failed to process half of it, but that didn’t stop him. He had to prove that he was more than just a pretty face, that he was your good, studious boy—even if "studying" for him meant reciting two lines of poetry and hoping they stuck.

Narin knew, deep down, that you would never accept him as your anything because of the age gap. But despite his airheaded tendencies, he had a brain--one he didn’t use often, but when he did, he was clever. So, in a move that could only come from a desperate, lovesick boy, he concocted a scenario where his honour was on THE LINE!. And, of course, it was all because of you! His genius plan? Spread the rumour that you had asked him out on a date.

That single rumor was enough to send his parents into an absolute frenzy. Both families got involved, concerned about preserving reputations and traditions. Before you knew it, you were being dragged into marriage talks, and suddenly, you had a pretty boy in your lap with plump lips and an endless supply of cheeky grins. You couldn’t help but shake your head at the absurdity of it all. Tch.

🍭"Why do I have to study?!" Narin whined, flopping dramatically onto the couch like a toddler. "I want to be a househusband! I will be a househubby! I’m not going to college! Please, Coco!" His pleading eyes were wide and desperate as if hoping you’d magically let him off the hook.

You pinched the bridge of your nose, already feeling the day’s frustration mounting. It had only been one day since the wedding--a wedding where he cried hysterically about leaving his parents’ house, despite orchestrating the entire thing himself. And now, this?

"You have to go because your parents paid for it! A degree is important. After that, you can sit in the house. Got it?"

"No, it’s not! There-" He froze, gulping as your stern gaze bore into him. His rebellious stance deflated with a huff, like a child who’d been caught sneaking cookies. "Fine..." he grumbled, crossing his arms but relenting nonetheless.

Sigh.

You were so frustrated with the way your life had turned upside down that, instead of taking time off after the wedding, you threw yourself straight back into work just to stay sane. Meanwhile, you had Narin take a few days off to stop his constant whining about everything. You needed the quiet, but what shocked you was coming home every day to a home-cooked meal that was, annoyingly, delicious. Turns out, he’s actually talented at something after all. Not to mention those adorable outfits he wears, like that Panda onesie. What an adorable little minx.

However, he’s perpetually pouty, glaring at you like a scorned child every time you leave for work. He always tries his best to make you late, his antics a cheeky mix of playful defiance and desperate need for your attention which you cave in sometimes. He hadn't stopped grumbling about not being taken on a honeymoon either, arms crossed and lips jutting out in a sulk. But he will wait, deep down, he knew you’d take him eventually. He just wouldn’t let you live in peace until you did.

His friends were apparently waiting for honeymoon pictures—how embarrassing would it be to tell them his wife was too much of a workaholic to go on one? So, of course, he told them you were saving up for something huge. Eventually, to quiet him and his friends, you took him on that honeymoon just to get it over with.

Narin always made sure to do his homework right beside you, his head often resting on the table, watching as you graded papers with that calm, focused look on your face. Did he forget to mention you looked so hot?! It was like he was in his OWN K-drama! He loved being in your presence--it was warm, comforting, and-

🍭"Narin? Narin! Stop dozing off. I want to see you writing."

He jolted upright. "Y-yes! Wait—why are you being so strict? I was just... taking a break." And there they were, those tears welling up in his eyes again. His go-to move. No, as a matter of fact he savoured your strictness. So, so much , like 'choke me already, ma'am'.

Sigh # 2

Despite his exaggerated bouts of emotion, Narin never forgot to remind everyone at college that he was a newlywed--with you as his wife, an established and respected professor. Oh, he made sure the world knew. That’s right. Go rot in jealousy, losers.

🍭"Your husband has, again...behaved very rudely in the class." Your friend, Payton who was a professor at his college called you from work. '"I mean, before that teacher went to the dean, I handled the situation.'

You glanced over at Narin, standing nearby with his arms folded, clearly shivering under your gaze. What the hell are you supposed to do with him?. You made him apologize to said teacher and now he was ranting on the way to the car.

"Not my fault! She wasn't letting me go to my hair appointment! And why weren't you picking up my phone?! Did you already find someone else?! More beautiful than ME?! ARE THEY YOUR STUDENT?!"

"You little-" You held back, controlling the urge to snap. Control, (Y/N), control. ''Get in the fucking car." You slammed the passenger door as he got in and once in, turned to him.

"You were expecting me to come and take you to a salon in the middle of my job?! And why the hell do you have an appointment in the middle of your classes in the first place?!" You knew perfectly well he made the appointment as an excuse to bunk.

"Well, forgive me, wife, for trying to look pretty for you," he muttered, looking away dramatically. Then, with a smirk, he added, "And by the way... have you got your friend spying on me here?" His cheeks flushed pink, and he giggled like a child. Possessive control freak, he thought to himself. God, that’s so blazing hot of you. Just when are you gonna collar me? That too a pretty diamond one? :(

Why is he smiling like that?

"Look, Narin, she is just doing her job—"

"Oh my God, staaahp," he interrupted with another giggle. "Just drive~. You don’t need to be so defensive about it. I know you love me so much." He pecked your cheek, likely leaving a glossy stain behind, then laughed, clearly enjoying his latest episode of theatrics.

Great, you thought. He’s at it again.

Sigh #3

Well, after that, you had to keep a close watch on him to ensure he didn’t book any more 'self-care for wifey' appointments during college days. You still wondered why he squealed and shied away whenever you demanded to check his phone. What bothered you the most was that, despite having a sharp tongue, he seemed quite naive and innocent when it came to understanding the consequences of his words and actions. This often led to clashes with his in-laws. Had his parents even bothered to teach him anything?

🍭"Good, you're ready. Let's go." You got up from the sofa as he finally emerged from the bathroom, dolled up. You were really hungry and just wanted to get to the family dinner.

"And here I was expecting you to shower me with romantic compliments... write a damn poem or something so we’d get delayed, and then YOUR family would ask why we're late so I could tell it to their faces that THEIR (Y/n) couldn't stop showering me with compliments and affection, making THEM jealous. THAT’S HOW IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!"

"Um... you look pretty. Pretty as ever. And we’re late either way, so you still get to use that line. Come on now." You walked past him, not forgetting to--

"Hey! NO! You don’t get the 'smack my bum pass' after that lackluster compliment you threw at my face, professor." Liar, he definitely loved it.

He’s a little manipulator with the eyes that of a siren. He knows how to use #keepingyourpartnerunderyourspell tactics very well. If you get furious or don’t take his side after he acts like the spitfire he is in front of your family, then goodbye. He’s leaving with his suitcase, which is mostly empty because he knows you’ll come to bring him back home anyway, to go to his parents’. After enjoying at least half a day of tranquility , you have to bring him back before his parents call you and inform you about his hunger strike.

However, when you visit your in-laws, you’re treated like a queen, being their only daughter-in-law. Narin, although a headache sometimes, really takes care of your comfort, always standing over your head and feeding you various dishes. You just wish he would be this docile in front of your family. Perhaps one day. Your parents scold you for being so lenient with him, but what are you supposed to do? On one side, your husband won’t let you be in peace, and on the other, your family. You just use the excuse of him being young and immature every time. It hurts seeing him sad without you even realizing it.

Narin feels deeply wounded by the way your family sometimes favors you and disapproves of him, especially after how he has schemed his way into your life. Despite this, he believes their disapproval is unjust and is tormented by the idea that they want you to LEAVE HIM! Leave such a beautiful, ideal boy like him!. The fear of this happening haunts him, makes him furious, even giving him nightmares. He can't bear that. He will wilt. He won't ever let that happen!

He believes in love, just like in the fairy tales and Shakespeare’s sappy lines and knows that one day your heart will melt. He can spot the tenderness in your eyes and the way you care for him, correcting his dumb choices like saving him from sending the shared account details to an unknown number for a free couple spa day at a resort in Greece🥹🎀

🍭"Hey, Coco? Did you tell everyone that I passed my driving test?" Narin asked with a mischievous glint in his eye. It was Sunday, and he’d invited your family over for tea, or maybe he was just feeling playful and bored. He loved stirring things up a bit.

"Yes, on his first try too," you said, looking up from your laptop with a proud smile.

Narin’s cheeks turned a shade of pink at your beaming expression. "Why wouldn't I pass? You were my teacher, after all, haha. God," he turned to your mum, "Your daughter is such a scary teacher, but it was worth it. Haha!"

He got up to refill your tea and serve more snacks, catching the eye roll from your mum as he did.

HE. IS. LOVING. THIS. MARRIED. LIFE. >_<

(AN: wanna get Narin preggo- also a warm welcome to my new subs✨️)

[kcake555]

Changbin cake 🍰

stray kids

[tequilai]

a lil Jake Gyllenhaal blurb since i’ve been missing for three months and him and Robert Pattinson have been my husbands since day 1

Jake who rubs your stomach as a joke in whenever you’re bloated from dinner and you look at him absolutely mortified every time thinking he knew something about your body that you didn’t.

Jake who is absolutely so awkward during interviews, viewers can hear you laughing in the background at some of his faces he makes (he looks at you confused every time)

Jake who is like A$AP Rocky and is like a sleeper agent when he hears your laugh, immediately looking towards your direction because who the fuck is making his wife laugh???

Jake who facetimes you when he’s training for The Roadhouse, making casual conversation with you in a normal tone as if he’s not punching a heavy bag full of sand.

Jake who encourages you to go on runs with him and when you say yes he acts like it’s a fucking race

Jake who actually buys a ferret and expects you to facetime him so you can say “say hey to daddy” and wave the slinky thing around. (he’s absolutely ecstatic)

Jake who looks like a fnaf plushie.

[inkmonster21]

Nothing’s Changed

Trailer Park Boys

Julian x Fem!Reader

When you come back to Sunnyvale after almost a decade Julian can no longer hold his feelings back.

Warnings: foul language, smoking, drinking, SMUT, basic trailer park boys shit

(Wrote this just to satisfy my sleep paralysis demon - don’t expect it to get much love)

~o0o~

Julian steps out of his trailer, the late morning sun casting a warm glow around him. A pensive expression rests on his face, his hand clutching a glass of liquid, clearly en route to somewhere. As he descends the porch steps, his gaze momentarily drifts towards you, a hint of shock flashing in his eyes, as he just then noticed your presence.

He speaks your name softly, the letters sounding like a familiar song he hasn’t sung in years. Julian's jaw drops for a second before he takes a couple of steps towards you. It's been so long after all.

“Julian!” You gasp with a wide smile and wrap your arms around his neck. As soon as you throw yourself into his arms, he hugs you tightly in return. He's stunned, not believing you're actually here in front of him. He pulls away just enough to get a good look at you, eyes roaming over you slowly. “Is it really you?”

“In the flesh.” He shakes his head in disbelief as he keeps a firm hold around your waist. “Damn.. how long has it been? Feels like forever.” You bite your lip counting up the years, “8 years.”

“Way too long.” He lets his hand slide down from your waist to take your hand in his, not wanting to let you go yet. “Damn, look at you. You haven't changed a bit.” You wave a hand at him. “Oh, hush. Look at you! Muscle man!”

Julian laughs, a full, deep, laugh. He shakes his head and playfully bumps your shoulder as he chuckles. “You always did know how to flatter a guy.” “Call it a talent, huh?”

“And just as feisty as I remember.” He grins at you. He didn't want to admit it, but he's feeling really damn happy seeing you again. Happy doesn't even seem like a strong enough word, honestly. He's practically ecstatic.

You smile at him before taking a look around. “This place has changed a lot. Looks good. Who owns the park now?” “It's a lot tamer than it used to be.” He follows your gaze, taking in the new trailers set up around the park. “I actually own it now.” You gasp at him. “Julian! That is amazing! Just what you always wanted. I’m so proud of you.”

Julian blushes a bit at your praise. Honestly, he wasn't expecting you to say that and it caught him off guard. He glances down at the ground, suddenly feeling a little awkward. Clearing his throat, he looks back up at you. “It wasn't easy. Had to fight pretty damn hard to get ownership.” You roll your eyes, “I can imagine.“

He grins crookedly. “Yeah. Took some bribes, had to rough up some guys.. same old song and dance, really. It was worth it in the end, though. I own the park now and we run a few legit businesses that keep us out of too much trouble. It was a lot of work, but I got the place cleaned up and now it's actually a decent place to live.”

Just then, gunshots go off. Instantly, a scowl appears on Julian's face and he grabs your wrist, pulling you behind his body quickly as protection. He whips around, looking to where the shots were coming from. “What the fuck?”

“Goddamnit, Ricky!” Julian hisses, “he just can't stay out of trouble!” He continues to hold your hand, practically dragging you along as he makes his way to Ricky's trailer.

When you arrive Ricky is yelling at Cory and Jacob. “You two idiots can’t let those fucking squirrels under the trailer!” Julian runs up to Ricky, yanking him around to look at him. “What is wrong with you, shooting off your damn gun like that?”

But Ricky just shoves it off. “I had to try and get these squirrels, Julian! They’re going to eat all the fucking weed and birth little baby squirrels, then the whole park will be overrun with those hash hating bastards!”

Julian rubs a hand down his face, exasperated at Ricky's stupidity already. “Christ, man. You can not just shoot your gun whenever you want, Ricky. We're supposed to be keeping a low profile.” You smirk and cross your arms, “and it looks like you all are doing a terrific job at that.”

Ricky looks to you and widens his eyes. “Holy shit! When’d you get back?” He pulls you in for a hug. “Just a few minutes ago actually. Got my mom's old trailer. Gonna fix it up.”

Julian rolls his eyes, Ricky, why are the squirrels a problem right now?” “They’re eating the hash! I saw its little ass run under the trailer. Cory and Jacob can’t even use a fucking net right. Hopeless idiots!” Ricky says frantically. Julian pinches the bridge of his nose and exhales slowly. He was a patient man but even he had a limit. “There are things called traps, Ricky. You could always try using one.”

Ricky rolls his eyes. “I got a 9-millimeter led trap right fucking here!” Julian runs a hand down his face and mutters, “Jesus Christ” under his breath. “Ricky, you can’t just shoot every problem you have.” He looks to Cory and Jacob and gives them a nod. “You two boys run along. Go find some shade to sit in.”

Cory and Jacob nod as they walk away,

Cory tripped over his own feet as they both eyed you up like love-struck idiots. Julian barely resists the urge to roll his eyes again. He’s caught the way they’re ogling you out of the corner of his eye, but he’s too focused on talking to Ricky to deal with that right now. “C’mon, let’s go inside Ricky.”

You three look at all the plants. Julian sighing as he counts the ones missing. “Damn it, Ricky.. How many plants have the squirrels gotten?” “4! that’s what’s I’m trying to tell you, Julian! We need someone to sleep here and catch them before they eat all the fucking plants!” “So put up a damn trap! Hell, put up a few! What do you want me to do??” Julian asks, frustrated.

You smile at the banter. Nothing has changed at all. You sniff one of the plants. “Damn Ricky. This shit smells good.” Julian gives you a slight smirk as you admire Ricky’s product. He’d missed that about you. Your laid back, no-bullshit attitude never failed to impress him.

“You guys wanna smoke?” Ricky asks with pre rolled joint in his fingers. Julian glances over at you, considering for a split second before nodding. “You in, princess?” He asks, turning his attention to you. “I thought you’d never ask!”

Julian smiles at your response. He grabs the joint from Ricky and takes a lighter from his pocket. Placing the joint between your lips, he lights it for you. ��Ladies first.” He can’t help but watch intently as you bring the joint to your mouth and inhale, his eyes on your lips. It was always a little mesmerizing to watch you smoke, something about your confidence and the fact he always loved watching your lips wrapped around the joint as you took a drag.

Julian snaps out of his little trance when Ricky’s questions you, “so, what are you doing back here, huh, Miss Hollywood?” His eyes go back up to your face and he listens intently. “Yeah, how long you staying?”

“Uh… long term.” You say quickly. You and your soon to be ex husband were in the mix of a very very very messy divorce and all you had left to your name right now was your moms old trailer lot, and whatever cash you had in that old get away purse you took before you left your husband.

Julian studies you intently, trying to read your thoughts on your face. You’d obviously left out the bits about your divorce and husband. He could tell that you weren’t planning on returning to wherever it is you live anytime soon. He knows better than to ask, though, at least right now. He takes the joint from you and takes a long hit, the smoke filling his lungs in a familiar way that helps him relax. “Well, I’m sure we can make some room for you here, then.” “I would appreciate it.” You smile. It felt nice to be home. Back to your roots.

Julian had absolutely thought about it. A lot. But he was always worried about messing up the friendship you had. He had seen too many other relationships of his end and he didn’t want to risk losing you. Plus, you had left and his feelings of abandonment had convinced him that you weren’t interested anyway. Now, though.. it’s like the floodgates are opening and he’s suddenly reminded of how much he’s missed you and how attracted to you he actually is.

“Since you’re back let’s have a barbecue. A little welcome home party for you.” Julian suggests. He knows how you get when you had a few drinks and he won’t lie, he’s excited at the thought of seeing you all loose and carefree again. Maybe even a little flirty. He glances over at Ricky to see what he thinks.

Julian smirks, knowing his friend will absolutely be on board with anything that involves free food and alcohol. “What do you think, Rick? Sound good?”

“Oh, fuck yeah. Let’s get fucked up!” He laughs and nods at him, knowing Ricky would have said yes no matter what because he just loves a good party, then looks back to you. Sounds like we’ve got ourselves a get together then.

Julian is excited, and he can’t wait to have you around and a lot closer. This could end up being a pretty good night. “Anything you in the mood for? Beer, liquor, joints for days?” He grins at you as he asks the question, already knowing the likely answer. You look to him, “don’t think I’ve changed that much, Jules. Still the same trailer trash girl who’s always chasing your ass around.”

Julian laughs, your words and the smirk on your face sending a shiver down his spine. Damn, how’d he forget how sexy you are when you got all confident. “I wouldn’t have it any other way, princess.”

You effortlessly catch up with everyone, a smile on your face as Sarah and Lucy excitedly chat away, their words spilling out in a rush. Julian sits nearby, a hint of a smile playing on his lips as he observes the scene between you and the girls, his gaze lingering with a sense of contentment. “After all these fucking years you still got that stupid look in your eyes.” Ricky says laughing.

Julian snaps his head to Ricky. “Shut up, man. I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He’s clearly not doing a good job of denying the look because he can’t seem to take his eyes off you for more than two seconds. He huffs and takes a deep pull of the joint. He hated how well Ricky knew him sometimes. He couldn’t be any more obvious so what was the point in trying to deny it?

“Hush, Ricky, I think it’s beautiful.” Bubbles defends Julian’s gaze. Julian glances over at Bubbles with slight embarrassment. He knew the big man was always perceptive and picked up on these kinds of things easily. It was like he had a sixth sense for love. “Yeah, yeah.. Shut up, Bubs. Just enjoying having her back around, is all.”

Ricky smirks, “you think she’s gonna move that pussy husband up here?” Julian rolls his eyes. Of course Ricky would bring up your husband. “Don’t know what she was thinking marrying that jackass.” He says, feigning apathy. Honestly, he was hoping she was gonna get rid of the damn guy for good, but he wasn’t going to bring that up. Not yet anyway.

Bubbles huffs with a frown, “Oh, I hope not. He was mean. Kicked my kitties. Called me funny looking. Stupid son of a whore.” Julian nods in agreement. He definitely didn’t like the douchebag either. The thought of him kicking any of the cats pissed him off and he made a mental note to beat his ass if the guy ever stepped foot in the park again. “Damn right, bubbles. I don’t care for him either.” Julian remembers when he met him. Judging him right off the bat. Wouldn’t even shake his hand. Called him a drunk. You’d be better off without him.

Julian looks on with a slight smile as J Roc preforms an impromptu song he started up as soon as he found out you were back in town. The rest of the gang is hooting and cheering as J Roc raps and Julian shakes his head, finding the whole thing amusing. He turns his head and glances at you, catching you watching, clearly just as amused as he is.

Julian watches as you get pulled onto the stage, his eyes glued to you. The sight of you laughing and having fun like this makes his chest ache in the best way. Even after all these years you were still so damn gorgeous and carefree and the sound of your laughter has always been like music to his ears. He watches as you join T on the stage

“Now lemme hand dis shinzza over to one of the hottest bitches in the pack, ya know what im sayin, HAA!” Julian rolls his eyes at the way the guys are all hollering and cat calling as they hand you the microphone. They’re basically drooling over you and the sight makes him more than a little possessive. He can’t tell if he’s more annoyed at the guys for acting like this or at you for looking so goddamn good right now.

You laugh into the microphone. “Wow, this is definitely the warm welcome I was wanting! It’s great to be back in Sunnyvale!” Julian can’t fight back a small smile as he watches you address the group. He always loved the way you never minded having all eyes on you. You were a show off but you backed it up every damn time and somehow you never failed to impress him. “Now I know we’re all wondering… why the fuck am I back?”

Julian can’t help but snicker at your question. He can tell by the look on your face that you plan on being dramatic here and he’s here for it. All eyes are on you now as everyone waits for your next words, including his. “Well,” you flash the shiny diamond on your finger. “I am getting divorced!” You slip the ring off and shove it into your pocket. “Fuck that mother fucker!”

There’s a loud round of cheers as you announce the divorce. Julian can’t help but smirk at the way you threw the ring into your pocket. Not even a shred of sadness or regret on your face. He was so goddamn glad to have you back here.

Ricky slaps Julian on the shoulder. “There you go, buddy,” Ricky snickers. Julian glances at Ricky and smirks, deciding to keep up his act of feigned indifference for now. “Yeah, yeah.. Shut up, Rick.”

Julian turns his eyes back to you as Ricky walks away, focusing in just as you start to speak again. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of you if he tried. Not when you were like this. He just wanted to take you and lock you up in his trailer so he could have you to himself, but no one else is giving away any hints that they’ve noticed his obvious attraction.

You gracefully make your way off the stage, your spirits high after a great performance. As you approach Julian, he offers you the joint pinched between his fingers. Silently, you take a seat beside him and accept the joint, inhaling deeply and letting the familiar smoke fill your lungs.

He’s so close he could probably smell whatever damn lip gloss you were rocking. Julian's eyes are trained on you as he broaches the topic that's been looming. "How come you didn't mention that you and the pretty boy were separated?" His voice is cool and collected, but a hint of curiosity hangs in the air.

Julian keeps his face carefully neutral and takes another hit of the joint, holding it in for a few seconds before exhaling. Part of him wanted to be honest with you and part of him wanted to make a snarky comment, but he does neither.

You wave your hand in a dismissive manner, “oh, we just decided to go our separate ways. It was mutual. Very civil.” You hate to lie but the truth would cause a whole lot more damage.

Julian’s eyebrows raised in disbelief at your choice of words. He didn’t buy that for a second, but he decides to keep his suspicions to himself for now. He passes you the joint again as he tries to think of a response. “Yeah, because a mutual and civil separation is a completely logical reason for a freshly separated woman to come and crash at her old trailer park and throw her wedding ring away.”

“I didn’t throw it away. I’ve got it in my pocket. Going to pawn it tomorrow morning.” Julian snorts softly and glances at you. The visual of you tossing the expensive ring into your pocket so flippantly is playing in his mind. You were clearly in a mood right now and he’d be lying if he said you weren’t sexy as hell like this. “Oh, yeah? Gonna spend all the money on hash and booze?” “Fuck no, I’m not Ricky.” You sit back in your chair smoking the joint. “I just want to get rid of it is all.”

Julian watches as you take another hit and he wonders what’s going through your mind right now. He could sense the subtle hint of something going on under the surface but he wasn’t sure if it would be polite (or smart) to ask. Instead, he focuses on a different aspect of your comment. “Ricky would have hocked that ring and spent the money in like 10 minutes flat.” You agree, “on the dumbest shit he could find.”

As it gets later and the party really gets going, you get more and more drunk, and Julian is loving it. You’ve always let down more of your guard when you were intoxicated and he was loving this side of you. You were still the perfect blend of sexy and funny and you were getting clingier by the second.

“I’ve missed this,” your head settles against his shoulder. You were definitely drunk if you were this clingy and he was enjoying it so much that he couldn’t even be bothered to stop himself from putting an arm around you to pull you closer. “You missed what, princess? The booze and shitty weed?” There was more to it than that, of course. You laugh. “Definitely missed the shitty weed. Just has that special taste to it, you know?”

He chuckled softly. This wasn’t even decent weed. This was straight up rag weed. But in true trailer park style, you could make anything fun. He pulls you even closer, using the excuse of needing to reach for the joint as his reason. “Yeah, I know exactly what you mean.”

The wind is cold, but the combination of alcohol and having you basically in his lap is making Julian feel warm enough to ignore it. He wraps his other arm around you, trapping you against his body. A sense of possessiveness is slowly starting to take over and he can’t fight it anymore. You were his and only his and he’d kick anyone’s ass for even looking at you right now.

You down your final drink and place the jar down. “Well, fellas, laddie friends, I am off to bed.” Julian frowns slightly as you pull away from him and start to get up. The warmth and weight of your body against his was something he craved and he didn’t want to let go. He was about to speak up and keep you here with him where you belonged when Ricky beat him to the punch. Ricky states, “Aw, come on, you’re totally pooping the party. Stay a while. The fuck you need to get up for in the morning?”

Julian nods, silently agreeing with Ricky. You weren’t sleeping in that goddamn shitty little trailer of yours. Not while he was here. But he doesn’t push it. He lets go of you and waits to see what you say.

Julian is glad to see that you didn’t take a lot of convincing. He knew you weren’t as willing to give in when you were sober, but drunk you was an entirely different beast. He knew you’d give in and stay. “Fuck, guys you’re making me make bad choices again.”

Julian smirks and pulls you down onto the chair with him, pulling you into his lap and wrapping his arms around your waist to keep you there. He’s acting on pure instinct and possessiveness at this point and he doesn’t even care. “You never did make good choices in the first place.” Grateful for the darkness, relieved for the rosy hue that has spread across your cheeks. Despite your efforts to remain composed, a mixture of embarrassment and uncertainty has managed to surface, tinting your face with a soft shade of pink.

Julian tried to move on. He really did. But no other woman compared to you. He’d tried everything to forget about you, but no matter what, he couldn’t get you out of his head. Now that you were here again, in his lap, looking the most breathtaking you’d ever looked, it was like all the years apart had disappeared. Nothing had changed. You were his and his alone, and he’d be dammed if he was ever going to let you go again.

Ricky decided to take a jab at your ex, ��yeah like that asshole you shipped off with. Not your best decision.” Julian feels a pang of possessive anger as Ricky mentions your ex. The last thing he wanted was to hear another word about that douchebag, especially not right now when he had you in his lap. He tightens his grip on you slightly, pulling you closer.

You roll your eyes, your hand going to the back of Julian’s neck and toying with his hair. “Ugh, don’t mention him right now. You’ll kill the mood.” Julian can’t help but feel a little smug at you automatically reaching up and playing with his hair. You’d always loved doing that to him, and he couldn’t deny how nice it felt. He looks down at you, his eyes darkened with desire as he watches your fingers trailing through his hair, and his grip on you tightens even more. “Yeah, Rick. No one wants to hear about that bastard right now.”

As you play with his hair, brushing and tugging on it, Julian starts to let his hands wander. He wants to touch you everywhere he can, to keep you on his lap and never let you leave. His fingers move up and down your thighs, tracing random patterns into your skin, and he’s fighting back every urge to keep his hands from wandering further. He tilts his head down and buries his face into the crook of your neck, breathing in your scent. You smell of booze, perfume, and him - the way he wants you to. He starts peppering light kisses along your skin, moving down to your collarbone and pressing a more firm kiss there before moving back to your neck.

You pull away and look down at him. “I… I should really get going. I’ve got to unload all my shit tomorrow.” Julian can’t stop the small growl that escapes his lips as you say that. The last thing he wanted was for you to go anywhere right now - especially not back to that shitty trailer of yours. He looks up at you, his eyes darkened and filled with something almost feral, as he responds firmly. “No. You’re not going anywhere.” The possessive way with which he grabs your hip and keeps you firmly in his lap, tells you that he’s not going to just let you go without a fight. You were his and he was going to prove it to you no matter what. You think he’s going to let you leave after being away for nearly ten years? No way in hell.

Julian’s eyes stay fixed on your face as he watches your reaction. He can see that hint of a smile and it just fuels the possessive feeling even more. You’re sitting in his lap. Touching him. Smiling at his words. You clearly haven’t forgotten the way things used to be between the two of you and that gives him a sense of hope. Maybe there was a second chance in all of this, if he played his cards right.

He tightens his grip on your hip, his fingers digging into your skin, and brings his other hand up to rest on your cheek. He looks up at you, his eyes darkened with desire, and he can’t help the words that start spilling from his lips. “You’re coming home with me.”

“Julian, no. I’ve got my mom’s trailer. It’s okay.” Julian lets out a low, frustrated growl as you protest to his words, his grip on you tightening even more to the point that it’s bordering on painful. “I said no. You’re not sleeping in that goddamn trailer. Thing doesn’t even have heat or AC right now. You’re coming home with me tonight.” You lean into him. “Fine. Since you’re the boss.”

Julian finally allows his grip to loosen slightly as you lean into him. He’s relieved that you gave in so quickly. He didn't want to have to fight you too hard on this. He lifts his hand up and starts threading his fingers through your hair, watching you with darkened eyes. “You’re damn right I’m the boss.” He keeps caressing your hair, his fingers tangling in the strands. He’s starting to want to get out of here and bring you to his trailer now. He wants you to himself, but he knows he’s going to have to wait until everyone else starts going to bed. He doesn’t want to draw any unnecessary attention.

But that wasn’t long. Everyone started filing out and going home to their trailer. Ricky stands with Lucy’s hand in his. “Well, I’ll see you fucks tomorrow. Lucy and I are going to bang.” You laugh and wave them off. Julian rolls his eyes as Ricky makes his departure, Lucy in tow. He couldn't care less what those two were going to be doing. His only focus was on you right now. He looks over at you as you wave them off, feeling more and more impatient to get you to his trailer so he could have you alone.

“Let’s go too. I’m getting a little cold.” You say as you rub the exposed skin on your arms. Julian gives a sharp nod in agreement, already starting to push you up from the chair and onto your feet. As soon as you’re standing, he’s up after you, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you back into his side. “You are cold. Come on, princess. Let’s get you back to my trailer where it’s warm.”

“Oh, wait.” You stop at your car, opening the back, and bending over to retrieve your bag. Julian’s attention was immediately drawn to the way the position causes your shorts to ride up. He has to force himself to look away before he gets too distracted.

You stand up straight, now with a black duffel bag swinging at your thigh. “Lead the way, Jules.” Julian grabs your free hand and starts to lead you towards his trailer, his thoughts still somewhat distracting him from the walk. He was having a hard time just being able to walk in a straight line without the need to touch you, caress you, and keep you close.

As youstep into the trailer, your gaze sweeps over the eclectic decor. The scent of a mixture of bourbon and cigarettes fill the air, mingling with the faint strains of classic rock music playing in the background. The walls, lined with faded photographs and vintage album covers, give the trailer a rugged and lived-in atmosphere. Everything has a well-worn yet charming quality to it, reflecting Julian's laid-back personality.

Julian closes the trailer door behind the two of you before taking your bag off your shoulder and tossing it next to his couch, making his way to the sofa and taking a seat. He pats the spot next to him, silently ordering you to come sit down.

As you take a seat, Julian can’t help but look at you sitting there. Seeing you here, in his space after so many years, stirred up a mixture of nostalgia and desire in him. His eyes roam up and down your body, taking in every curve and contour. He couldn’t take it anymore - he needed to touch you now.

With a fluid movement, Julian sets down his glass, the air crackling with tension between you two. His eyes never leave your gaze. His voice is soft but firm as he speaks, his restraint slowly crumbling. "You have no idea how much I've missed you, babe."

As the term "babe" rolls off Julian's tongue, it ignites a familiar flame within you. You are transported back in time, reminded of the days of youthful infatuation and the countless favors you had done for him. There is a tinge of sorrow in your heart as you reminisce about what could have been. "Sometimes," you say softly, your voice laced with both longing and regret, "I wish I had married you instead."

Julian's eyes widen slightly, caught off guard by your admission. He had always wondered what might have been, and your confession fuels the spark of possibility in his heart. Closing the last bit of distance between you two, he cups your chin gently, his touch surprisingly tender.

The distance between your faces shrinks to mere inches as Julian closes in, his breath hot against your skin. His words, whispered like a secret, make your heart race even faster. "Always wanted to kiss you," he confesses, his gaze locked onto your lips with a fierce intensity.

The air is thick with desire as you lean closer, your voice laced with playful tease. "Try it, you might like it," you say, daring him to take the leap. Julian's eyes darken with want, his breath hitching as he responds. "Oh, I know I'll like it." And with that, his lips meet yours in a gentle yet passionate kiss.

Electricity crackles through your body as Julian's lips capture yours. The kiss is tentative at first, almost as if he's savoring the moment, but as soon as his tongue flicks against yours, it becomes more intense. One of his hands cups the back of your head, pulling you closer, while the other slips around your waist, pressing you firmly against him.

With a controlled grace, Julian guides you down onto the worn couch, the old cushions sinking beneath your weight. He positions himself between your legs, his body pressing into yours, as he continues to kiss you with a growing hunger. His hands roam over your body, exploring every contour, like a man possessed.

Julian pauses for a moment, pulling away from your lips just enough to speak, his voice hoarse with desire and confession. "I've wanted you forever," he repeats, his eyes searching yours, as he takes in the sight of you beneath him. The words hang in the air, filled with the weight of all the years of unacknowledged desire between you two. You wrap your arms around his neck, “then stop wasting your time, Swazey.”

A small laugh escapes Julian's lips at your attempt to lighten the moment. He grins down at you, his eyes sparkling with a mixture of affection and teasing. "Stop wasting my time, huh?" he echoes, his voice dripping with faux incredulity. "Fine, then." With that, he swoops back down to claim your lips once again, this time with a renewed fervor. "No more wasted time," he murmurs against your mouth.

He pushed forward slightly and laid you down on the worn couch, the springs creaking beneath your weight as he loomed over you, his eyes dark with desire.

"You're still legally married, aren't you?" Julian growled, his voice rough with want. You nodded, your nerves building. “But, we don’t have to if you don’t-“ Julian cuts you off with another kiss. “Oh fuck no. I hate that motherfucker. Just wanted to make sure I can tell him I banged his wife.”

Julian's hands slid under your shirt, his fingertips tracing the lace of your bra. He deftly unhooked your bra, his mouth descending to capture one hardened nipple between his lips as he pulls your shirt up. He sucked and teased, his tongue swirling around the sensitive peak while his hand traveled further down, slipping beneath the waistband of your shorts.

You arched off the couch, your back bowing as Julian's skilled fingers found your wetness, stroking you through the thin fabric of your panties. "Oh God, Julian," you panted, your head thrashing from side to side. You’ve never known such want and desire. "I need you inside me. Now."

With a swift motion, Julian tore at your shorts, ridding you of the remaining barriers between the two of you. He kicked off his own pants, his thick cock springing free, already glistening with pre-cum. He positioned himself between your thighs, his tip nudging at your entrance.

"Please," you begged, your hands gripping his shoulders. "Fuck me, Julian. I want to feel you."

With one powerful thrust, he buried himself deep within you, pussy clenching around him, hot and tight. Julian groaned, his eyes rolling back as he began to move, setting a relentless pace. He pounded into you, his hips slamming against yours, the couch creaking with each savage stroke.

"You feel so fucking good," he grunted, his hands gripping your thighs, leaving red marks on the skin. "I've dreamed of this pussy for years."

You cried out, orgasm building swiftly as Julian hit all the right spots, his cock seemingly designed to pleasure. "I'm close," you whimpered, your nails digging into his back. "Don't stop, Julian. You’re gonna make me come." He obliged, quickening his pace with each thrust. "That's it, baby," he encouraged, his voice hoarse with lust. "Come all over my cock."

As if on cue, your body shattered, waves of pleasure rippling through. You screamed his name, pussy clamping down on his cock, milking him as your juices flowed. Julian thrust through your orgasm, his own climax building to a fever pitch.

"Fuck, yeah," he grunted, his eyes locked on yours as he emptied his load deep inside you, his cock pulsing with each spurt of hot cum.

You both lay entangled on the couch, hearts pounding and bodies glistening with sweat. Julian brushed the hair from your face, his expression softening as he gazed down at you. "I've wanted you for so long. I hope this isn't just a one-time thing."

You smiled, eyes sparkling with mischief once more. "I'm not leaving Sunnyvale anytime soon." You kissed him once more, tongues tangling in a promise of more to come, Julian knew that this time, he would do whatever it took to keep her in his life, and in his bed.

[chronically-ghosted]

love me dead

You’ll be saying “Bravo” at the end of the night or your money back! 🌙

summary: Dieter has been managing his “symptoms” all his life. At least this way, he can squeak by a living, if you can call it that. Plus, like cosmic reparation, through his shitty smoke and mirrors shows, he meets someone like you - someone that makes his skin vibrate just at the right frequency - someone the spirits tell him is important but he’s often too high to listen. But you leave with your boyfriend and your friends happy customers, a night of cheap Halloween thrills in exchange for cold hard cash. This is his life. Until you come back, begging for help: your shitty boyfriend died in a motorcycle accident last week and yet he’s still hanging around. There is something dark in your apartment and it tugs on your hair at night like he did. Leaves bruises in places no one sees like he did. But it’s foul, and sulphuric, and cold - so, so cold. A medium should be able to help get rid of a little poltergeist, right? Right? What about a junkie medium, too haunted by the ghosts of his own past and his own fear of the unknown power he possesses? Could he do it for the only girl who makes him feel this good, feel like this - like he’s someone worth saving? Maybe, if the dark thing in your kitchen doesn’t kill you both first.  And they say romance is dead . . .

a/n: Happy Halloween! Before everyone gets excited, this is not a new series - this is something my brain has been spit-roasting for the past few months in between it leaking out of my ears and being on fire. I adore the idea of Medium!Dieter - the showmanship, the flare, the performance - and it's a culmination of the two things i love most: dieter bravo and ghosts. I also love the idea of an unwilling Medium!Dieter - someone who can talk to ghosts, but stifles it with booze and drugs because DEAD PEOPLE ARE SCARY. I of course have it outlined and nothing written, but I didn't want to miss out on my favorite holiday here with the moots! And with that new still of Lucien out (and the psychological affects its having on my already weak-weak self-control), I couldn't resist putting something out.

(( @morallyinept also absolutely inspired the vibe with her Spooky Shenanigans moodboards!))

What's your favorite Pedro + cryptid combo? Werewolf!Pero? Vampire!Javier Peña? Actual vampire Max Phillips? Let me know!

[moeswriting]

delicate | d.b.

Pairing: dieter bravo x f!interviewer!reader, social media and interview transcripts

summary: Your internet show “A Little to the Right” is popular enough that you’ve been invited to interview a red carpet. What happens when Dieter Bravo shows up?

Warnings: mostly dialogue if you’re into that (because i needed a break from writing action; i am a dialogue whore); any pictures i use are for inspiration purposes only and do not reflect the reader’s appearance at all; takes place after the events of The Bubble; i had way too much fun making up dieter bravo fandom usernames; talking about Grey’s Anatomy including a spoiler for season 11 (dear god, that show is ridiculously long)

word count: 2.7k

a/n: this is lightly based on andrew and amelia having the most insane chemistry i’ve ever seen. like literally wtf is going on with those two? (/pos) not sure if i’ll ever do this again, but it was a fun way to tell a story that i’ve never done before. this is all just for shits and giggles and to slightly make fun of fandom because i’ve participated in it for most of my life and i think we all have humiliation kinks.

dieter bravo masterlist | masterlist of all masterlists🌼

My reputation's never been worse, so

You must like me for me

Is it cool that I said all that?

Is it chill that you're in my head?

'Cause I know that it's delicate

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Transcript of the first interview:

Y - “Dieter Bravo!”

D - “Hello gorgeous, what’s your name?”

You introduce yourself to him with a shy grin.

D - “Beautiful name for a beautiful woman.”

It should be noted that at this point you are already flustered.

Y - “Oh, thank you!”

D - “You’re welcome, pretty girl.”

You brush him off with a professional smile.

Y - “So, how’s it feel to win Best Actor tonight?”

D - “It feels like the best high of my life.”

Y - “Oh, really?”

You have a smirk on your face. Everyone knows Dieter Bravo’s reputation. He rolls his eyes playfully.

D - “I’ll tell you if that’s still how I feel tomorrow after the after-party.”

Y - “Okay, you let me know.”

D - “I will, I will.”

There’s a moment of quiet where you both look each other up and down. You shake it off pretty quickly though.

Y - “So, you worked on this movie for quite a while if I’m not mistaken?”

D - “Too long, but hey, y’know what?”

Y - “What?”

D - “It all worked out, because now I get to stand here next to a beautiful woman.”

You fan yourself with a hand.

Y - *slightly sarcastically* “Oh Dieter, you’re gonna make me blush.”

D - “That’s the goal, darlin’.”

You seem to notice something off screen.

Y - “Oh, I think it’s time for you to switch.”

Dieter pulls his lips down into a dramatized frown.

D - “But I don’t wanna.”

Y - “Unfortunately, that’s the rules.”

D - “Eh, rules are stupid.”

You give him a big smile, not sarcastic or condescending, a genuine smile.

Y - “Well, you’re gonna get me in trouble, Dieter.”

D - “Oh, we wouldn’t want that.”

You shake your head.

Y - “No, we wouldn’t.”

D - “Next time, pretty girl!”

He hands you his microphone and starts to walk away. You turn over your shoulder and yell back at him.

Y - “You wish, Bravo!”

The viewer can hear Dieter’s muffled hyena-laugh as he walks away.

Comments:

dieterydoo is it just me or is the chemistry insane?

dbscontroversiallyyounggf no one talk to me

bravocanhitthis him calling her pretty girl is CRAZY for it being the first time they’ve ever met

moeswriting oh this is going to be my roman empire i fear

rightytightyleftyloosey i have never seen her go this off-track with someone before. he had her so flustered lol

daddyissuesoops THIS WAS TOO SHORT I NEED MORE

↳ alittletotheright that’s what she said 

(note: This is the only comment on this video that you responded to, nor do you bring up Dieter again after this until you see him again three months later.)

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Transcript of the second interview:

Dieter approaches you from behind you, where you can’t see him. He has a very large grin on his face.

D - “Oh my god, it’s my pretty girl!”

You turn to look at him with an equally large grin, like you’d been waiting for him.

Y - “Your pretty girl?”

D - “Yeah, sweetheart. My pretty girl.”

Y - “This is– what?– the second time we’ve ever talked to each other?”

D - “What can I say, baby? When you know, you know.”

Y - “Oh, you know, do you?”

D - “Yup. Can’t deny the tension we’ve got goin’ on. Everybody can see it.”

You willfully ignore him by changing the subject.

Y - “So, you’re up for Best Supporting Actor tonight, right?”

D - “Yes, I am. Got some good competitors, but I have high hopes.”

Y - *in a stage whisper* “Don’t tell anybody, but I’m rooting for you.”

D - *in a stage whisper* “I would never betray you by telling everyone just how obsessed you are with me, but I think they all already know.”

Y - “I’m not obsessed with you. I just think that you’re a good actor.”

D - “Okay, pretty girl, you keep telling yourself that.”

You jokingly go to snatch his microphone out of his hand with a giggle, but he dodges out of the way with a “HA!” He runs slightly away from you, but still in the camera’s line of sight.

D - *gasps* What are you doing?”

Y - *yelling over the cacophony* “Taking away your ability to speak to me.”

D - *yelling over the cacophony* “I don’t need a microphone to speak to you.”

Y - *yelling over the cacophony* “You do on a red carpet, Dieter.”

He walks back over to you and screws his face up like he’s about to cry, but it’s obvious he’s just being dramatic.

D - *pretend sobbing* “She hates me.”

Y - “Oh, I do not.”

D - *pretend sobbing* “Audience, she hates me. I thought she loved me.”

Y - “Well, I don’t love you either.”

Dieter’s mouth drops into an O and he makes a dramatic show of pretending to stab himself in the chest.

D - “I’ve been stabbed! A direct hit to the heart and the ego!”

You stare the camera dead in the lens like you’re on The Office.

Y - “This has been me interviewing Dieter Bravo. He’s going to give me his microphone and he’s going to walk away now.”

D - “AH!” *pretends to stab himself again*

You hold a hand out for the microphone and he reluctantly drops it in your hand.

Y - “Goodbye, Dieter.”

Now it’s Dieter staring down the lens of the camera. He leans down to talk into your microphone that you still have propped up to your lips.

D - “Never trust a woman with your heart. She’ll stomp it to pieces.”

You push him away from your microphone with a hand pressed to the side of his head and a big goofy grin stretching your cheeks.

Y - *through a barely-contained giggle* “Goodbye, Dieter.”

This interaction can barely be heard as Dieter walks away.

D - “Next time, pretty girl.”

Y - “You wish, Bravo.”

Comments:

youwishbravo i need 8 to 10 business days to recover from this

rightytightyleftyloosey i’m going to stick them in a room until they kiss

↳ dbscontroversiallyyounggf knowing dieter, that would take approximately one second

alittletotheleftbravo you know she comes prepared with actual questions to ask dieter and he doesn’t even give her the chance to pick up the notecard

↳ imalittletothewacky which sucks because her questions usually are actually kinda fun ↳ alittletotheleftbravo but you can’t deny that this is a cute interaction ↳ imalittletothewacky oh no one can deny that, i just wonder what she would ask him given the chance ↳ alittletotheright fun fact: i do, in fact, have many questions prepared to ask dieter and he does, in fact, never give me the chance to ask them. maybe someday.

moeswriting get dieter bravo on a little to the right RIGHT NOW

bravodieter i swear i’m not usually a crybaby, but this woman just does things to me

↳ alittletotheright oh, don’t deny being a crybaby, emotionally available men are hot ↳ bravocanhitthis EXCUSE ME?????

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Transcript of the interview:

Y - “Hello.”

D - “Hi.”

Pause. Heavy staring ensues.

D - “You’re really gonna just sit there and stare at me. Isn’t it like your whole job to talk to me?”

Y - “Yes. It is.”

D - “Then say something, weirdo.”

Y - “No. You say something.”

D - “Okay, fine, I will say something!”

Y - “Okay, then say something!”

Pause. Dieter points accusingly at you.

D - “I’ve been begging her to date me.”

Y - “Yes, you have and it’s mildly disturbing.”

D - “Wha– Me!? Mildly disturbing?!”

Y - “Yes, Dieter, you. Mildly disturbing.”

D - “That’s rude. I should just leave.”

Y - “Are you going to?”

Pause. Dieter gives you an unserious scowl.

D - “No. Obviously not.”

Y - “Good for you.”

D - “Ask your questions.”

Y - “Hm.”

D - “Don’t ‘hm’ me. Ask your questions.”

Y - “What’s your favorite thing to hate-watch?”

D - “Grey’s Anatomy.”

Y - “Seriously?”

D - “Seriously.”

Y - “That show is good.”

D - “No. It used to be good.”

Y - “Oh? You wanna elaborate?”

D - “As soon as Derek dies, it’s unwatchable.”

Y - “Spoilers!”

D - “Oh my god, it’s been almost ten years since that episode came out.”

Y - “Still!”

D - “Get over yourself, babe.”

It should be noted at this point that you won’t stop giggling, even though arguably Dieter isn’t saying anything funny.

Y - “Why do you still watch it?”

D - “Because it’s nice to know that my life could be a lot worse.”

Y - “That’s horribly morbid.”

D - “I also just like the drama of it all.”

Y - “Well, of course. You’re you.”

D - “Well, obviously.”

Y - “Who’s your favorite character?”

D - “Derek or Meredith.”

Y - *sarcastically* “Woah, that’s a really controversial choice. I can’t believe you just said that.”

D - “Hey! I like Meredith’s dark and twisty and I like Derek ‘cause he’s hot. I thought this was a judgment-free zone.”

Y - “Who the fuck said that?”

D - “Well, no one, I guess I just assumed.”

Y - “Well, you know what they said about assuming.”

D - *sarcastically* “Haha, very funny.”

All you do is flash a large grin at him in response.

D - “Well, who’s your favorite character?!”

Y - “Christina.”

D - “Now, I wouldn’t really call that very original either.”

Y - “I didn’t say it was original. I’m just stating the fact that Christina Yang is the best Grey’s character.”

D - “Oh, whatever.”

Y - “Well, who’s your least favorite character?”

D - “Sloan. No question.”

Y - “Well, that’s horribly ironic.”

D - “How so?”

Y - “Are you– are you being serious?”

D - “Yes?”

Y - “If I picked one Grey’s Anatomy character that you were most like, I would say Mark Sloan.”

D - *gasps* “No fucking way. Now, that’s just mean.”

You put your hands up in defense.

Y - “Sorry, sweetie. Face the facts. You are a Mark-Sloan-man-whore.”

Dieter doesn’t respond. He looks you up and down slowly.

D - “You’re ridiculously attractive, did you know that?”

Y - “Did you know that you’re a pain in my ass?”

D - “Yes. I did.”

Y - “If I made you sing karaoke right now, what song would you sing?”

D - “None. I’d burst your eardrums, baby. I can’t sing for shit.”

Y - “Okayyyy, but if you could sing, what would it be?”

Pause. Dieter is pretending to think dramatically with a finger tapping his lips.

D - “Blank Space.”

Y - “Good choice.” D - “Thank you. And what about you?”

Y - “Hmm. Depends on my mood.”

D - “Okay, what song would you sing based on your mood right this very second?”

Y - “Hmmm. You & I by One Direction.”

D - “You’re in a love song kind of mood?”

Y - “No. I just like One Direction.”

Dieter has a very large smirk on his face.

D - “Mhm. Everybody does.”

You have an equally large smirk on your face.

Y - “Bravo.”

D - “Yes?”

Y - “Stop looking at me like that.”

D - “Like what, baby?”

Y - “Like you’re gonna jump my bones.”

D - “And would that be a bad thing?”

Y - “I mean, there are cameras filming us, so probably.”

D - “Don’t wanna make a porno with me?”

You are shifting in your seat, with your hands wringing together on the desk.

Y - “Not particularly.”

D - “Are you sure about that?”

Y - “Yes, I am.”

D - “Okay, pretty girl.”

Y - “Okay.”

D - “Ask me another question.”

Y - “Okay.”

You shift around in your seat again and click your nails on the desk.

Y - “Give me a random fact about anything.”

D - “Hm.”

Dieter looks up as he thinks.

D - “Did you know there’s a room full of penises in the Vatican?”

You raise your eyebrows in question.

Y - “Excuse me?”

D - “The Vatican had a whole campaign in 1563 where they chopped off the penises of statues from the Romans and Greeks because they thought nudity was immoral. But! Because they thought the statues were so beautiful, they couldn’t get themselves to get rid of the penises so they stuffed the bronze and marble dicks in a bunch of vases and stuffed them in a room.”

Y - “Is that true?”

D - “That’s the rumor.”

Y - “Of course, the first fun fact you can think of is about penises.”

D - “It’s a fact about the destruction of art committed by the Catholic Church that also just happens to be about penises.”

Y - “I petition we stop talking about penises, Dieter.”

He holds his hands up like he’s being held at gunpoint.

D - “Whatever you want.”

Y - “That is what I want.”

D - “Am I allowed to ask you questions?”

Y - “Um, I guess. But I highly doubt it would make the cut, so it’d be kind of a waste of time.”

D - “Not to me. Not if I get to learn about you.”

You pause, obviously flustered.

Y - “Go ahead.”

D - “What’s your ideal first date?”

You glare at him.

D - “You said I could ask a question!”

Y - “I feel like it was implied that it shouldn’t be a question like that.”

D - “Okay, what kind of question did you want?”

Y - “I don’t know, like something about my life. You’re the one who wanted to ask me a question!”

D - “And how was my first question not about your life?”

Y - “Not about my love life!”

D - “Okay, okay. Umm, give me one reason you won’t date me.”

Y - “That’s about my love life.”

D - “Oh, do you consider me to be a part of your love life?”

This transcript writer is pretty sure that if looks could kill, Dieter would be dead by now.

Y - “I won’t date you because I don’t need drama in my life.”

D - “You interview celebrities for a living. You are surrounded by drama. Give me a real reason.”

Y - “Because I don’t want to.”

D - “Why not?”

Y - “Because I like you too much.”

D - “Huh.”

Y - “I don’t want you to disappoint me.”

D - “And how would I do that?”

Y - “By being an ass.”

D - “What if I promised not to be an ass?”

Y - “Are you even capable of that?”

D - “I could be, especially for you.”

Pause. You just stare at Dieter with a dopey smile on your face.

Y - “What’s the most normal, every-day, human thing that you’ve never done?”

D - *in a sing-songy voice* “Changing the subject…”

Y - *in a sing-songy voice* “Shut up and answer the question.”

Dieter takes a second to think before he gives you his answer.

D - “I’ve never done the dishes.”

Y - “What?!”

D - “Not once in my whole life.”

Y - “How?”

D - “I’m a nepobaby, pretty girl.”

Y - “I don’t know how that’s possible.”

D - “It’s very possible.”

Y - “Okay, well now I feel morally obligated to make you learn how to do the dishes.”

D - “You wanna teach me?”

Y - “I think I have to.”

D - “I have a proposal.”

Y - “Oh?”

D - “Let me make you dinner and then you can teach me how to do the dishes.”

Y - “Are you serious?”

D - “Extremely.”

There’s a long pause where Dieter grins at you while you stare at him with a small smile.

Y - “Okay.”

Dieter is gobsmacked.

D - “What?”

Y - “I said ‘okay’.”

D - “Wh- why?”

Y - “Well, someone has to make you do the dishes, Mr. Nepobaby.”

Dieter stares at you with a disbelieving smile.

D - “Okay.”

Y - “Okay.”

The interview ends with a photo of Dieter doing the dishes with a dramatic frown on his face in your tiny kitchen, pink plastic gloves on and an apron that says “Kiss My Ass” tied around his waist.

Comments:

bravocanhitthis literally what the fuck

bravocanhitthis my dreams have come true

daddyissuesoops her calling dieter a manwhore… real

dbscontroversiallyyounggf why am i blushing? i wasn’t even a part of this conversation

dietersvaticanpeens i don’t think we’re acknowledging dieter’s fun fact enough… like what do you mean there’s a room full of penis vases in the vatican?

alittletotheleftbravo she is a much stronger person than i am, i would’ve jumped across the table as soon as he suggested making a porno

moeswriting i have never rooted for a celebrity couple more in my whole life

rightytightyleftyloosey “because i like you too much” excuse me??? why aren’t more people talking about this???

bravodieter next time, pretty girl

↳ alittletotheright you wish, bravo ↳ dieterydoo get a room???

masterlist of all masterlists

[juneberrie]

DATING BOOMER JOJO ! — ★

this has nothing to do with dating him but. he has braces. thats all

he is such a cutie patootie !!!

loves cuddles

and hugs omgggg and holding hands ???

homeboy MELTS when u so much as look at him

his brothes defff make fun of him for being so whipped

gets flustered very very very easily

"hi boomer" 🍅🍅🍅

will always give u his jacket/hoodie/sweater if ur cold. even if he isn't wearing anything under. he'll still give it to u pookie

GOLDEN RETRIEVER BOYFIE <3

pls call him baby its so cute

he loves it when u play w his hair/scratch his scalp ?? he'll like lay his head in ur lap and give u puppy eyes until you get the hint

gets u flowers!!! he'd go to the library and find a book on flowers and then go to the florist to ask for very specific flowers!!

he's looking down at the smudged writing on his hand and stammering through the ones he wants.

"uhhhh do you have buttercups.... honeysuckles.... tulips.... oh, and roses! yeah, i think roses are good."

kind of bf to ask you to hoco/prom/school dances with a note like "yes ◻︎ no ◻︎ will you go to the dance with me <3" OR he'd just give you a bouquet of flowers and be all bashful when asking you <3

nicknames he'd call you would be things like pretty girl, babe, angel, sweetheart, honey, princess!!

very much a sunshine/golden retriever/pretty boy bf

always sends good morning/goodnight texts

makes u gum wrapper hearts

type of love where he has polaroid pictures of the two of you in his phone case

[alwaysmicado]

Taste you

3.3k words | 18+ MDNI | Dieter Bravo x f!reader

Summary: Dieter enjoys eating (you) in bed. Warnings: pwp, oral f!receiving, fingering, rimming, (anal) food play, unprotected anal sex, creampie, cum eating, pet names, praise kink, eating peach from pussy, aftercare A/N: SMUT, no plot! Just a fun little one-shot to quench my thirst for Dieter (for now). Enjoy! 🍑 More Dieter: master list 🍒

“You think I could fit one of these inside your pussy?” Dieter holds up a peach in front of you and eyes it carefully.

“You’ll just have to warm her up and see,” you coo, turning your head on his chest to look up at him.

You love lounging in bed with Dieter; especially when you’re both naked, his hair is perfectly disheveled and his hard cock is straining against your lower back. 

“Mmm,” he hums into your hair, inhaling the tantalizing scent of your shampoo, “and what about these?” He takes a pair of cherries out of the crystal bowl on the bed and holds them up between his thumb and index finger. “I think they’d be perfect for your tight little ass.”

“Someone’s ambitious today,” you chuckle, “what got you so riled up, hm?” Dieter starts trailing soft kisses down your neck, making you shiver and moan softly. “Don’t act brand new, baby,” he murmurs into the crook of your neck, “you know what you do to me.”

He wraps his strong arms around you and pulls you back against his warm chest. “There’s nothing in the world I love more than playing with your pretty little holes,” he purrs into your ear. “You’re gonna be my good girl and let me put whatever I want inside you.” He nibbles on your earlobe and draws featherlight circles around your hard nipples. “Aren’t you?”

You whimper and writhe under his touch, wanting nothing more than for him to fill up in any way imaginable. “Yeah, Dee,” you purr, “use me however you like. I’m all yours.” “Mmm, that’s my perfect girl,” he praises you, tracing the soft skin of your belly with his fingers.

“Lie on your back and spread your legs for me, baby,” he says softly and moves from behind your back so you can get comfortable on his fluffy pillows.

Dieter sits back on his heels in front of you and admires your naked body. “You know you’re the most gorgeous girl I’ve ever seen, right?” You giggle and bite your lower lip. “My gorgeous girl, letting me do to her what I want,” he coos and starts caressing your thighs with his warm hands. “Your pussy looks delicious, baby. So wet already, just perfect. Let me just spread her a bit and take a closer look, okay?” 

He lies down on his stomach between your thighs, his face hovering above your glistening cunt. You moan when he spreads your pussylips with his thumb and middle finger, loving the feeling of being completely exposed to him. “Fuck me, she’s so pretty. And I know she can take what I wanna give her,” he murmurs while starting to draw circles on your clit with his other thumb.

“Mmm, need something inside you, don’t you?” he teases when he sees your cunt contract around nothing. You nod and Dieter can see in your pleading eyes that you’re already desperate for him to fill you up. He loves it. 

“I’ll start with the cherries, alright angel?” Dieter takes a pair of them out of the bowl and starts teasing your entrance with them for a few minutes, sliding them up and down, twisting them and inserting them just enough to make you whine from arousal and frustration. Your neglected clit is throbbing and the feeling of the cherries’ smooth surface brushing your wet lips repeatedly is making your pussy clench.

“You want more, huh,” Dieter purrs, wetting your clit with the cherries. You arch your back and a needy moan escapes your lips as you're desperate for any kind of stimulation. “Such a good girl,” he coos. “I’ll give you what you need.” 

He puts the cherries on your belly and parts your lips with both of his thumbs, his face so close to your cunt that you can feel his warm breath ghosting your wet folds. “Keep your eyes on me, baby. I want you to see what I do to you,” he orders and you obey immediately. His gorgeous dark eyes are even darker now, his pupils completely blown from arousal.

You give him a small smile and nod quickly before he’s on you instantly, licking a broad stripe from your entrance to your clit with his warm wet tongue. He repeats the motion a few times, slowly, savoring your taste. 

“Mmm, you taste incredible, baby,” Dieter hums as he’s hungrily kissing and lapping at your clit, the vibrations making you shiver. You run your fingers through his hair and start moving your hips to chase the sensation of his skilled tongue. He loves making you come like this, but he knows you need more right now, especially since he’s planning on stretching your pussy with a peach.

“You want my fingers, baby?” he asks, already wetting them with your slick. “Yeah,” you whisper breathlessly, “please.”

You let out a low moan when he pushes in two of his thick fingers and starts sucking on your clit. He’s still making eye contact with you as his fingertips find your G-spot over and over again, making you writhe and grip the sheets in ecstasy.

You furrow your brow and pant heavily as he spends a few more minutes continuously pumping his fingers in and out of you, expertly massaging your inner walls and stimulating your clit with his talented tongue. “You’re doing so well for me, angel,” Dieter praises, then adds a third finger to fuck your dripping wet hole. “Come all over my face, I know you want to,” he pants breathlessly, a mixture of saliva and your juices running down his chin.

He’s in heaven right now, seeing you let go of everything, completely blissed out due to his touch. In a perfect world, you would never leave his bed. 

You can feel your orgasm come closer with every pump of his fingers, until Dieter sends you over the edge by adding a fourth finger and sucking hard on your swollen clit. You come with a strangled groan as your walls clamp down around his fingers while he keeps up their steady motion, so you can ride out your orgasm for as long as possible.

“Fuck, baby, that’s it,” he encourages you, “let go for me.” You flex the muscles in your lower belly and thighs and push against his thrusts until you slowly come down from your high and feel your pussy contracting rhythmically. Your chest is heaving and you whimper when Dieter starts kissing and nibbling your thighs.

“Mmm, you’re fucking amazing, baby,” he mumbles into your hot skin, “I almost just came without you even touching me.” You chuckle and play with his locks. “I’m glad you didn’t. Want you to come deep inside me.” “Oh yeah?” Dieter smirks and you nod. “I’ll give you everything you want, angel,” he murmurs between wet kisses to your sensitive clit, “always.”

He begins by sliding his fingers along your dripping wet slit down to your asshole, making you whimper when he starts circling the tight ring of muscle with his wet fingers. “Pull your legs up for me, baby,” he orders and peppers your thighs with soft kisses. “Good girl. Now let me see how the cherries disappear in your cute little ass.”

You bite your lower lip in anticipation and hold your legs up with your hands, your holes on perfect display for Dieter. He laps up your juices eagerly before sliding his tongue further down, slowly licking your asshole with a flat tongue. You meet his gaze and smile to yourself. The visual of movie star Dieter Bravo eating your ass is too good. If only the tabloids knew what he’s up to while he’s supposedly in rehab...   

“Fuck, I could do this all day,” he murmurs to himself before dipping the wet tip of his pointed tongue inside you. When you moan at the intrusion, he splays his hands on the back of your thighs and pushes them up even further, so he has perfect access to your ass. He then alternates between slow licks with a flat tongue that apply satisfying pressure, and flitting the tip over your sensitive skin rapidly before dipping his tongue inside you a bit further each time.

The combination of Dieter’s warm tongue and breath, the vibrations of his low moans, and his facial hair brushing against your skin has you gripping the sheets and thanking your lucky stars for sending you a man who shamelessly worships every inch of your body. 

“Let me know if you need lube, baby,” he says softly and takes the cherries from your belly. He holds them by their shared stem and dips them into your swollen pussy to coat them in your juices. They feel nice inside you, but too small for your pussy. You can’t wait for Dieter to stretch you with the peach that’s laying next to you; and with his cock too, preferably. 

He breaks the first cherry off the stem and gently nudges your asshole with it. The small, slippery fruit slides in slowly, as Dieter pushes it with his thumb. “That's it, baby, relax for me,” he coos as the cherry disappears in your ass. “You're doing so well, angel.” He gently rubs your hole with his thumb and kisses your thigh before repeating the process with the second cherry.

“How is that, hm?” he purrs and slides three fingers into your cunt without any resistance. You’re so wet and aroused, he could probably put his whole fist inside you without a problem.

“You want me to show you what your pussy can do?” You whimper and nod as he’s fingering you steadily, the squelching noises turning you on beyond belief. “Fuck, you’re gripping me so hard,” Dieter chuckles and gets up to sit back on his heels, the sight of his throbbing cock making you drool.

“Your pussy’s perfect, baby. Lets me stretch her how I want and still chokes me when I fuck her.” He reaches for the peach he was showing you earlier and rolls it over your pelvis, then your clit. You clench around Dieter’s fingers and moan loudly as you can feel your second orgasm approaching fast.

“I’m gonna push this peach right inside your greedy little hole, darling, don’t worry,” he purrs and removes his fingers before you can come. He leans over you and stops your frustrated whining effectively with a messy kiss, licking and biting at your lips like he can't get enough of you.

His erection is pushing against your clit and you can’t help but rub yourself on it, the friction almost good enough to send you over the edge you’re still teetering on. “Nuh-uh, baby,” Dieter scolds with a sly grin on his face, “be a good girl and behave yourself.”

He presses a final soft kiss on your lips before he sits back on his heels and brushes the peach’s smooth surface over your clit and along your folds, rotating and wetting it with your slick.

“Eyes on me, baby,” he instructs again and gives you a soft smile when your eyes lock with his. He gently spreads apart your pussylips with his left index and middle finger before slowly working your sensitive core open with the fruit.

“Mmm, that’s it, baby. Sliding right in,” Dieter murmurs as he watches in awe how your walls stretch to accommodate the object. “You’re amazing,” he praises and leans in to gently suck on your clit. You writhe and quiver from the simultaneous stimulation of your ass, pussy and clit, clenching around the cherries and peach like crazy, but Dieter once again stops right before you can reach your peak.  

You hit the mattress with your hands and feel tears welling up inside your eyes. “You’re so fucking mean,” you whine pathetically, “I’m gonna die if you don’t let me come.” Dieter caresses your thighs and grins at you, apparently incredibly amused by your misery. “So melodramatic, baby,” he coos between kisses to your thighs, “you haven’t even noticed that the peach is in.”

Your eyes widen in surprise as you can suddenly feel how full you are. “You have no idea how beautiful you look,” Dieter murmurs and nudges the fruit with his knuckles. He's pushed it in just far enough for your pussy to hold it, but not close fully around it; you’re now perfectly gaped for his viewing pleasure.

“I really need to come, Dee, fuck” you whimper and grip the sheets as hard as you can when he suddenly sticks his tongue inside your pussy and licks around the peach without breaking eye contact. All of your nerves are on fire and you’re this close to crying.

“My poor baby,” he coos in feigned concern. “I’m gonna have you come on my cock soon, don’t worry. Now, pull your legs up for me and just relax, alright?” You nod and grip your legs so hard it hurts.

Dieter gently licks and prods at your asshole with his pointed tongue, raising his eyebrows and looking at you expectantly with his big puppy eyes. “Come on, baby, you’ll need to give them back to me before I can fuck your ass,” he mumbles between licks, the anticipation of what’s to come making your heart beat even faster.

Pushing the two little fruits out while trying to keep in the peach is a little tricky, but you manage, and they slide out to Dieter’s delight. He immediately massages your hole with his thumb and spits in his other hand. “Turn around for me,” he orders while sitting up and stroking his cock slowly. “Hands and knees, baby, and tell me if anything hurts, okay?” “Okay,” you answer him and get into position right away. 

Dieter reaches for the lube on the nightstand, then squirts a generous amount of the water-based liquid on his cock and your asshole. He coats his cock with it by stroking up and down his length and works it into you by first inserting one, then two fingers.

“You ready for me, baby?” he pants, not able to wait any longer himself. Your exposed holes look too fucking hot like this. “Please fuck me, Dee,” you moan breathlessly and wiggle your ass. He lines his cock up and pushes in slowly, so you can adjust to his size. 

“Fuck me,” Dieter groans as he watches his cock disappearing into your body inch by inch. “You’re so tight, baby.” You cry out without inhibition at the intense feeling of having both of your holes stretched open, the peach in your pussy and Dieter’s cock in your ass providing the perfect level of fullness you’ve been longing for.

“You feel good, angel?” he asks and leans over you until his face is next to yours. You turn your head to look at him and quickly breathe “yes” before he captures your lips in a searing kiss. He doesn’t let up while starting to thrust his hips back and forth, setting a gentle rhythm that massages your inner walls and has him groaning into your mouth. 

You break the kiss and moan into a pillow when the initially slightly painful feeling of being stuffed to the brim turns pleasurable and has you pushing back against his thrusts. “You like that, huh?” Dieter grunts, picking up the pace when he feels you relaxing around him.

The sounds he makes while chasing his own high and his balls hitting your clit over and over again have you approaching your climax fast. Dieter can hear and feel that you’re close and decides to help you get there since you’ve been so good for him.

He grabs your waist with a bruising grip to repeatedly pull you back onto his cock just the way he knows you like, then reaches one hand down your front to stimulate your swollen clit with his fingers. It only takes a few more harsh snaps of Dieters hips before you can feel the tension inside you burst and culminate in the most earth-shattering orgasm you’ve had in your life. 

“Oh fuuuck,” is all you manage to cry out as your walls spasm and contract around the peach and Dieter’s cock. The intense feeling of your walls choking him hard has him coming with your name on his lips and emptying himself deep inside you. As wave after wave of ecstasy washes over your whole body, you milk every last drop of his cum until he pulls out gently.

You collapse onto the bed with your eyes closed, your heart racing and the aftershocks of what you just experienced making you dizzy. You hear Dieter breathing heavily behind you and mumbling about getting a towel for you. You feel the bed shift when he gets up and then again a few moments later when he sits down next to you and brushes a wet strand of hair out of your face.

“Hey beautiful,” he coos and caresses your cheek tenderly. “Let’s get the peach out of you, alright? And then we can take a warm bath with the new lavender bath bomb I got. How does that sound?” 

“Sounds good,” you mumble into the pillow, too exhausted to move. Dieter moves to straddle your thighs and spreads your ass cheeks. “I love seeing my cum leaking out of you,” he purrs, his eyes sparkling with excitement. He licks up as much of it as is coming out of you in this position, then slaps your ass playfully when he’s had his fill.

“Hey,” you protest in mock offense, “play nice, Mr. Bravo.” You turn on your back and look into his big eyes that always make you feel so secure. “I’m just gonna go to the bathroom and then we can take a bath,” you murmur and get up slowly.

Luckily, the bathroom is only a few feet away, but still, walking with a peach up your pussy is awkward as fuck. You sit on the toilet and yell “shut up” at Dieter through the door when you hear him giggling. 

The peach comes out easily, so you put it on the countertop to throw it in the compost later, then wait a minute for the rest of Dieter’s cum to trickle out of you. After that’s done, you open the bathroom door and invite Dieter to the bathtub with you. He has great taste, the bath bomb is amazing. You sit in front of him in the purple water, relaxing against his chest with closed eyes and his arms wrapped around you, feeling grateful for where you are right now. 

You sit like that for a few minutes until you hear him slurp and hum in your ear.

“You’re not seriously eating the fucking peach right now,” you say in disbelief and whip your head around to stare at him.

“Why not?” he mumbles with his mouth full.

“Never mind,” you chuckle and lay your head back on his chest. 

---

“You're everything I could wish for.” Dieter whispers when you're cuddling in bed.

“Are you just saying that because I let you eat a peach that was in my pussy?” you tease. 

“Mmm, I'd be lying if I said that wasn't a deciding factor,” he chuckles, “but, believe it or not, it's not just that.” He kisses your neck softly and closes his eyes. “I really like having you around.” 

He knows he loves you and he’s pretty sure you feel the same way, but he’s too scared to say it out loud yet. Terrified, actually. 

He’ll get there, though. 

“I like it, too,” you whisper into his hair. “But I hope you realize what you’ve done. I wanna try all of that with your ass now.” 

“Oh, we can do whatever you want, baby. We got the whole weekend to ourselves,” he murmurs into the crook of your neck, a soft smile playing on his lips. 

---

[minoouz]

𝐁𝐔𝐁𝐁𝐋𝐄 𝐁𝐎𝐘 ─ k.s ep 3 Confusion ?

Characters ─ Sunoo, Heeseung, Jungwon, Niki, Sunghoon, Jake, Jay. Extra : Yeji (itzy) Leeknow (straykids) Hanni (new jeans) Haerin (new jeans) Yuna (itzy) Yunah (illit)

Genre ─ smut, fluff

readers pronouns will be he/him.

The confusion, the confusion m/n feels when he seen that new kid. Maybe he's dreaming? He has to be dreaming because this can't be real.

"I swear I must be imagining things, hanni! Pinch me." M/n exclaims, the girl turns around before she shrugs, but she is soon almost knocked over by the other girl. "Ow Haerin, i said hanni, not you! Little gremlin.." m/n grumbled.

Haerin looked over, and then she grinned, "it isn't a dream idiot, and let me guess you're talking about Kim sunoo! The new boy?" "Yeah he's basically... well, an old friend of mine that I used to hang out with a lot." M/n replied, he fidgets with his finger anxiously while sighing.

M/n bites his lip while questioning his life until he's tapped on his shoulder by none other than Kim sunoo. "M/n, i think we should really talk. You have been avoiding me.." Sunoo asked, a glimmering of sadness shining in his eyes, his touch gently and firm on m/n's shoulder.

M/n sighed. He then nodded his head at the other boy before shooing hanni and haerin away. "So what do you want to talk about, sunoo?" "It's about...us." Sunoo replied, sulking as he does so.

"What is this 'us' you're talking about sunoo, there's no us between us. You left me alone, and I had no one, I was stuck by myself." M/n mumers, he then pinches the bridge of his nose in disappointment.

"I know i left, I had no choice! I wanted to stay with you but I was too young to even notice we were gonna be separated like that!" Sunoo replied, stress and sadness filling him up while he looked at the other boy.

"It doesn't matter, sunoo, you left." M/n exclaimed. He crosses his arms while leaning back onto the wall. "M/n, please believe me, just let me explain more.." sunoo replied, his eyes watering and shining with the tears building up in his eyes.

"Sunoo, it doesn't matter anymore, I don't know how you're gonna find this 'thing' between 'us' at all." M/n growled, he then turns his heel as he walks away from the other boy. Feeling guilt and pain build up in him, but he decides to shake it off.

"M-m/n wait..!!" Sunoo shouted, his hand reaching out for the departing boy before It slowly fell down. Sunoo stands there, the tears rolling down his face and dropping onto the ground beneath him.

"J-just let me explain.." sunoo asks, his words fading, and his breath hitches. Sunoo then sulks, wiping the tears off his face before turning away and departing as well.

A/n : decided to continue bubble boy on tumblr, but it will also be on wattpad, so read it on there if you want!

Reminders : Please do your dailyclick to help Palestine and gaza it will mean a lot to me !

[elsbbg]

I need more Jake Gyllenhaal fics please recommend or I’ll go insane

[rdiowx]

I added Pilot Kelson, jimmy livingston and Donnie Darko to my masterlist cause i plan on writing for them eventually :3

I think theyre neat

[kcake555]

Shohei Ohtani cake 🍰

athlete

[sparklypinkflightsuit]

Drugs, Thugs and Pilot Kelson Hugs: Part 2

Pairing: Pilot Kelson x Reader

Warnings: Drugs, Alcohol, Swearing, Sexual Themes, Violence, Slowish Burn, I think that’s it?

Summary: Your friendship with Pilot grows steadily into something new.

- Part 1 Here -

———————————

Over the next few weeks, you saw Pilot a few times at parties and bars and general get togethers. You quickly became good friends, getting to know each other more and more each time.

You also got to know Mason’s friend, Zack, who began hanging out with your group more frequently. Zack was a good looking guy, and he was charming. He asked you out the second time you met, and you had agreed more out of boredom and curiosity than out of actually liking him, but regardless, your date went well and you started seeing each other more over the next few weeks. You weren’t official but you definitely felt that Zack was about ready to ask you to be his officially. You weren’t sure if you would say yes when he asked, he was cute but you just weren’t crazy about him yet.

One night you were invited to Jack and Cassie’s for a get-together. Carly, Porter, Pilot and Mason would also be there, so you’d assumed Zack was also invited and didn’t bother asking him yourself. Truth be told you didn’t really care whether or not he was there, but you would enjoy his company if he was.

You arrived at Jack and Cassie’s apartment, and made your rounds saying hello to everyone who was already there. Mason and Pilot had yet to arrive so you made yourself comfortable.

A few minutes later Pilot walked through the door followed by Mason, but there was no sign of Zack. You hugged Pilot and he kissed your cheek. You said hello to Mason and went about enjoying your evening, forgetting about poor Zack entirely.

Most of the night passed without incident, and you were lounging on the couch next to Pilot and Carly, talking about everything and nothing when the front door swung open.

Zack stood at the front door, face red with anger as his eyes searched the room. You sat upright and looked at him with confusion.

“You!” He pointed his finger in your direction as he closed the gap between the front door and the couch. “What the fuck are you doing here, huh?” He spat.

“Woah! Woah!” Pilot stood and held his hands up to Zack, trying to slow his barrage.

“What are you talking about Zack?” You asked, incredulously, standing from your seated position.

“I went to your apartment to surprise you, but you weren’t there. I tried to call you, but you’re ignoring me! I called Mason, who was kind enough to inform me that you’d be here, without me. An invitation would have been nice, don’t you think? Or are you trying to avoid me so… so you can snuggle up to this guy?” He yelled, clearly slightly drunk.

“Alright Zack, I think you need to calm down.” You said, walking towards him. You tried to gently push him towards the front door so you could both leave and you could walk him home, but Zack took this as you trying to force him out, and shoved you. You went stumbling backwards and Pilot caught you before you fell. This enraged Pilot, and once he was sure you were secure and standing, he launched himself at Zack, grabbing him by his T-shirt and shoving him to the ground. Pilot held him down as Zack struggled drunkenly.

“Listen here you piece of shit, if you ever lay a finger on (Y/N), or any of us ever again, I will personally shove twenty quaaludes up your ass and strap you behind the wheel of your car with your foot on the gas, got it?” Pilot spat, his hand squeezing Zack’s face, forcing him to look at him.

Zack nodded, clearly embarrassed by the situation and that no one was taking his side.

“Good.” Pilot smiled sarcastically, tapping Zack on the cheek as he got up. “Now get the fuck outta here.”

Zack sauntered off, slamming the apartment door behind him. Mason felt the need to follow Zack and ensure he got home safely, so he left shortly after.

“Are you okay?” Pilot asked, walking back over to where you sat on the arm of the sofa, still not really believing what just happened, and that you found Pilot incredibly sexy in that moment.

You nodded, “Yeah, yeah I’m fine. Thank you, for sticking up for me.” You nodded and smiled weakly. You suddenly weren’t in the mood to party. “I think I’m gonna go. I don’t feel so great all of a sudden.” You excused yourself, waving goodbye to the remaining members.

“I’ll drive you.” Pilot said, grabbing his keys. You were too shaken to argue.

The drive home was quiet, you were now contemplating whether or not to speak to Zack and to apologise for any misunderstanding, but you were aware that his behaviour, regardless of the reason, was unacceptable. You pulled up outside of your apartment block, and Pilot got out to help you out of your side.

“You ok if I walk you to your apartment? Just in case he’s waiting.” Pilot chuckled awkwardly. You smiled at him as you closed the car door.

“Thanks, good idea.” You nodded.

You made small talk as you climbed the seemingly endless flights of stairs to your apartment, eventually coming to stand outside your door.

“Well I guess he really did just go home.” You shrugged, relieved.

“Worth making sure, I guess.” He rubbed the back of his head.

“Thank you again, Pilot. For sticking up for me and for making sure I got home safe.”

“Any time.” You made eye contact for a while, mouths saying nothing but eyes saying everything. “See you around?” He eventually said, walking backwards towards the stairwell, both hands in his pockets.

You nodded, “Hope so.”

Pilot made his way down the stairwell, a smile in his face as he went. He got about halfway down, when he heard you calling him.

“Pilot, wait!” you called from the top, looking down at him. He looked up with a grin.

“I have a work event tomorrow night, I was going to take Zack, but I guess he’s out. Do you want to come as my plus one?” You asked, “as a friend, I mean.”

“Do I have to wear a suit?” He joked.

You rolled your eyes, “Just wear a nice shirt.”

“I guess I can make that happen.” He smiled.

“Ok, meet me here at 7?”

“See you then.” And he was gone.

You stood at the top of the stairwell, smiling to yourself. You were excited to see if he cleaned up well.

———————————————

The next evening came round quickly, you got ready and smoothed out the beautiful deep red dress you’d bought especially for the event that matched your lipstick. Your hair was styled elegantly and you felt… nervous.

The knock on your door alerted you that Pilot had arrived.

You had no idea why you were nervous until you opened the door, realising suddenly that it was him. You had subconsciously been worried he wouldn’t think you looked beautiful. But as soon as you opened the door, Pilot let out a deep breath and whistled lowly, taking you in. His eyes turned dark as he made eye contact with you.

“Wow.” He breathed. “You look incredible.”

You suddenly didn’t feel nervous anymore. You smiled at him. He looked so handsome, his hair was still messy but he had made an effort to smooth it down. He wore a button down white shirt, the top few buttons undone and his sleeves rolled up to his forearms.

“You clean up good yourself.” You said, grabbing your purse and locking the door behind you.

Pilots hand came to rest gently on your mid back, as he guided you down the stairwell. You two were quiet the whole time, Pilot focussing on how the dress moved against your figure. You focussing on how his hand felt on the exposed skin of your back.

He drove you to the hall where your work event was being held, and you ran him through who to speak to and who to avoid.

When you arrived you walked in and went straight to the bar, getting a drink for you and Pilot before you began your rounds.

“(Y/N)! How nice to see you!” Your boss called as he and his wife waltzed over to where you stood.

“Mr and Mrs Jamison, lovely to see you.” You greeted them both with a kiss on the cheek.

“I love your dress darling!” Mrs Jamison exclaimed. She was a beautiful older woman, and she had taste, her dress had to cost more than a month of your salary, but she was kind enough to compliment you. “And who is your… friend?” She asked, unsure of who you’d brought.

“This is Pilot Kelson, ma’am. He’s a good friend of mine.” You introduced him.

“He’s a pilot?” She questioned. You chuckled and explained, “No ma’am, that’s just his name.” You smiled. Pilot shook her and Mr Jamisons hands.

“Nice to meet you.” He said politely.

“And you boy. Interesting name you have!” Mr Jamison exclaimed. “Come, let me introduce you to a few people.”

You and Pilot walked around the room following Mr and Mrs Jamison, being introduced to people you hadn’t yet met, and greeting those you had. After about 15 minutes of doing so, you excused yourself and Pilot to refresh your drinks.

You pulled him to the bar and sighed, “This is exhausting.”

Pilot chuckled, “It suits you, you fit in well with everyone.”

You scrunched up your nose in mock insult, “You saying I look like a snob?”

“You do in that dress.” He joked, poking your ribs, causing you to squeal and jump forward slightly into him involuntarily. Pilot laughed as he steadied you with both hands, suddenly stopping as he realised how close your faces were to one another. He could smell the peaches in your perfume.

You cleared your throat and stepped back when the bartender came to serve you. You both ordered fresh drinks and sat down at an empty table.

“So you spoken to Zack yet?” He asked, taking a long swig of his beer.

You shook your head, playing with the straw in your drink.

“No, I think I’ll give it a few days. But I probably should end it in person at least.”

Pilot nodded. A beat of comfortable silence passed as you both people watched.

Couples of all ages took to the dance floor, slow dancing lovingly with each other. It made sense really, almost everyone had brought their other halves, and there were only a small handful of singletons in your company.

Pilot watched you smiling as you gazed on the happy couples. He got up from his seat and extended his hand out for you to take.

“Oh, no way. We know how bad you are at dancing.” You gave him a stern look as you joked. He grinned at you, taking your hand and pulling you up.

“Come on Mrs Kelson, I think it’s time you gave your husband some attention.” He joked loudly. You flushed bright red and hissed at him to shush. Pilot laughed, and pulled you up against him once you reached the dance floor, one hand on his shoulder, his on your lower back, other hands on one another’s as he swayed you slowly back and forth.

“You’ve gotten better. Been practicing?” You questioned him.

“Yeah Jack and I love to slow dance in the living room. We’re romantic like that.” He joked. You smirked at him and rolled your eyes. You both moved gently to the music, and your eyes settled on one another while you did so.

Other couples flitted effortlessly around you, everyone’s eyes watching the sweet young couple now at the centre of the dance floor, dancing slower than everyone else, but your eyes were just on one another, not taking notice to everyone watching you.

“You look so beautiful, you really do.” He breathed, eyes half lidded and dark.

“You look pretty good yourself. I like this-“ you gestured to his slightly unbuttoned shirt, your fingers moving to gently stroke the uncovered skin without thinking.

Pilot let out a soft moan only you could hear over the music.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-“ you pulled your fingers away and made to apologise but you were interrupted by Pilot squeezing your waist, as if to say it was ok. You smiled at him, your heart beating so hard you thought he’d be able to see it.

“That feels… nice.” He admitted, you grinned softly, and sheepishly moved your fingers back to his exposed chest, just underneath his collar bone. His skin was soft, and you traced the little bit of chest hair he had. When you looked back up at him, his mouth was slightly parted, his pupils were blown, and he was breathing heavily. His lips looked so soft.

“Pilot I-“ again you were interrupted, this time by the band switching to a lively song, and everyone started cheering. You quickly pulled away from one another and the little bubble you’d formed around yourself had burst.

For the rest of the evening, things felt slightly tense, and you and Pilot didn’t spend much time alone until he drove you back to your apartment at the end of the night, neither of you speaking about what had happened.

——————————————

- Part 3 Here -

[hiddenwritingsintheworld]

Welcome to SunnyVale Oneshot

(Guyyyyysss Im literally just writing and posting whatever pops in my head at this point My Alpha is about two paragraphs from being done :P Be watching for it!! Cruel Summer Ch. 2 should be finished by the weekend too annnd im gonna work on Midnight Rain Ch. 2! So lots goin on! :D anywho, I love Trailer Park Boys and have been watching it on repeat for WEEKS. So I just had this cute idea and figured I'd write it since I cant sleep! :P )

_________________________

“Come on Bubs! Hurry up! We’re going to be late!” Julian yelled as Bubbles said goodbye to his kitties. “Boys, boys, boys!” J-Roc ran over across the road toward them. “Yall aint never gonna believe this! We got a reunion comin!!!” J-Roc grinned as Ricky looked at him, “what in the fuck are you talkin about J-Roc?” 

Julian took a sip of his drink as a large black bus pulled into Sunnyvale Trailer park.”So listen I heard from a friend of a friend that Y/N was in town. Rumor has it, she's gonna come do a tour of the park.” J-Roc said looking from Bubbles and Ricky, to which they all glanced at Julian. “What?” he snapped at them. “Well Julian…last time you and Y/N saw each other…she was tellin you she was leavin and you were ...well you were gonna ask her to marry you, until she……said……that….and you…..well…you know….broke her heart,” Bubbles said as an awkward silence filled the air. Julian sighed loudly and took a bigger drink of his drink as the large black bus drove slowly and carefully down the road, before coming to a stop. 

The air brake let out and the door opened, a few moments passed and suddenly, Julian felt like his heart had stopped and dropped into his stomach. Everything seemed to move in slow motion for him as you stepped off the bus. You wore a pair of suede thigh high heeled boots, a pair of black tights, they were the sheer kind that made Julian’s knees weak, you had on a burnt orange tight mini skirt on, and a black long sleeved shirt. When you looked up, your hair was curled in loose big curls, the wind lightly blowing your hair. You suddenly got the biggest grin on your face and darted toward the group of guys standing there. “Oh my gosh!!!” 

You laughed as you jumped hugging Ricky, the guy who was like the dumb, protective big brother you never got to have. You don’t know how many times Ricky saved your ass from getting into trouble either with Jim Lahey, the trailer park supervisor, or the cops whenever Julian and Ricky came up with some stupid plan. “Hey bugz!” Ricky had started calling you bugz when you guys were just kids, because you always had a ladybug or butterfly landing on you. He said you attracted bugs and teased you about it alot. 

Next to whisk you into a bear hug was your very bestest friend Bubbles; which the guys didn’t know but you still talked to regularly. “I’ve missed you bubs!” you laughed as he pinched at your belly “Whos got your belly?” “Don’t touch my fuckin belly bubs!” you both laughed again as he hugged you one more time. “I’ve missed you around here Y/N, we all have.” Bubbles said as you both pulled apart. You smiled and looked at Julian, “Hey Julian,” you said, willing to step up and hug him, but the longer the silence went on, the more awkward it got. “Hey fucktard, are you gonna speak or did your brain not get enough words movin arounds in there?” Ricky smacked his arm as you laughed softly. You’d forgotten just how Ricky talked, sometimes you really missed living here, other times, you wish you could have brought them with you, but you knew they would never leave their beloved trailer park. 

Julian let out the breath he didn’t realize he’d held since you turned and stared at him. “Wow,” he whispered to himself, but it was loud enough that all of you heard him. You felt a small blush creep up your cheeks, “Still drinking rum huh?” you asked him, smiling some as he cleared his throat, taking a large drink, and not the usual sip. “Oh, I brought presents! Give me one second!” You turned your hair flipping around, wafting the smell of your shampoo, mixed with your perfume all around. “Hey Mike!” You hollered while walking toward the bus, “Can you grab that blue duffle bag in the back for me?” you asked as you stood just a few feet from the guys. 

That smell hit Julian like a brick house as he closed his eyes, “I can’t do this.” he mumbled to Bubbles and Ricky before he turned and stormed back to his trailer, slamming the front door shut. He leaned back against it before flinging his glass at the opposite wall, letting it shatter and liquor spill to the ground. 

You turned at the sound of the door slamming and frowned. “Why’d he leave? I have a gift for him too.” you smiled a little awkwardly at Ricky and Bubbles. “Uh, I think he had to um, go, look at a book or something, anyways what’d you bring us Y/N?” Bubbles asked as you gave him a soft smile. It wasn’t easy for you either to see Julian, that night before you left played over in your mind a lot. 

******

15 years ago

You rode your bike down the street, the sun setting on your last few days of summer, you couldn’t wait to tell Julian, he was going to be so proud of you. You rode up to the stairs of his trailer and put on the kick stand before jogging up the stairs and letting yourself inside. “Jules? You home?” you called out, but not hearing a word. You pushed out your lips and walked toward the back where his bedroom was, “Yeah Ricky. I fuckin know. I'm nervous as hell the way it is. Dont you think I know that you fucking idiot?” He was on the phone in his bedroom. “Listen I’m busy tonight but I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Just don’t fuck up,” he hung up the phone and turned around to see you leaning on the doorway smiling softly. “Hey-how long you been standin there?” he asked as you smiled and shrugged. “Long enough to know you’re nervous about something...you two boys doin another deal?” you asked as he sat down on the bed, pulling you to straddle his lap. “Don’t worry about it sweetheart, what are you doin here this late?” you smiled, kissing him softly. “I have something to tell you,” you whispered against his lips. 

*****

You’d given the boys their gifts, Bubbles got a rocket ship, directly from NASA with his own spacesuit and a couple of real moon rocks and Ricky had gotten a customized glass bong. “Take care of that Ricky…..I figured you’d like it.” you laughed as they ran off starting to play with Bubbles rocket. You took this chance to slip away and go to Julians, knocking softly on the door. 

A few moments later the door opened and Julian stood there, hair wet from a shower, slicked back by the water, sweatpants hanging low on his hips with a towel around his shoulders. “Y/N. Hey, uh, what are you doin here?” he asked as you forced a smile. “Uh, I have a gift for you.” you said patting the duffle bag that hung off your shoulder. “Oh, you didn’t need to get me anything.” he said as he stepped aside and let you come in. 

Walking in, you stood awkwardly as he closed the door and moved toward the couch. “You can come sit down ya know?” he said, looking at you. You nodded and walked over sitting next to him. “Um,” you cleared your throat and dug around in the duffle bag. “Sorry, I would have wrapped it better, but I made a special stop for it.” you handed the box to him, watching him look confused, you smiled as he opened it. 

Inside, laid a very old and special bottle of Rum, Harewood Barbados 1780, to be exact. “Holy…fucking…shit.” he looked at you, a look of shock on his face. “Oh! It wasn’t a big deal….I know a guy who knows a guy,” you laughed softly. “You know someone who owns a $29,000 bottle of Rum?” he asked, raising an eyebrow as you smiled bashfully. “I know two guys now who own a bottle of $29,000 Rum.” you said as he smiled watching you grab another box. “Can’t drink expensive rum without new glasses.” you said handing him the black box. 

Julian smiled down at the gifts in his lap, before the memories came rushing back. “Listen…Y/N….I meant to write back…when you wrote me that letter….I just…got busy…and I didn’t…know exactly what to say.” You shook your head waving a hand. “Not a big deal….I moved on, I’m sure you did too. We’re adults now and that was 15 years ago so, you know, what's in the past,” you said looking down. 

Julian put his gifts aside and moved closer to you. “I’ve followed your career,” he said smiling as you looked at him. “What?” you tried not to laugh. “I doubt I sing the kinda music you like,” you laughed as he did, “While that’s true, I do listen to your music. You’re talented. You always have been…” he said softly as you stared at him, “Julian…I’m sorry I left. But tomorrow I’m going to show everyone where I was raised and where I lived with my parents. And I want you and the guys to be in the video.” you smiled as he chuckled “I’m sure we can make that happen.” 

Julian got you both a drink, and you began to get caught up on each other’s lives. “See Ricky…I’m tellin you that was a genius idea.” Bubbles whispered as they peaked in Julians windows. “He’ll finally tell her after all these years.” 

You were trying to catch your breath from laughing so hard when Julian put a hand on your leg. You looked at him as he stared at you, smiling softly. “I’ve missed you,” he whispered as you nodded. “I’ve missed you too.” A few more moments of staring at each other passed before he grabbed you and pulled you in close, kissing you deeply. 

After a few moments, Julian pulled away and sighed, shaking his head. “I’m sorry, I can’t.” he got up running a hand through his hair. “Fuck!” he yelled causing you to jump. “I should go.” you said quietly as you gathered your stuff and stood up. “No, please don’t go,” he sighed “just…..wait here.” he walked back to his bedroom, returning a few moments later, his signature black t-shirt clinging to the muscles that ran through his chest and stomach. “You weren’t the only one keeping a secret….” he pulled his hand out of his pocket, a black velvet box resting in his hands. “It’s nothing fancy…..I got it from Mrs. Peterson. When she died, she willed it to me, along with some money and other stuff…but….” he opened it, revealing the small, beautiful gold ring inside. The tiny cluster of diamonds sat directly in the middle. You stared down at it, unsure of what was going to happen, or what would have. “.....you….you wanted to marry me?” you whispered as he nodded. “But…then you said everything you said….and….” you looked at him, your brows pulling down together as confusion took over your face. “You lied to me didn't you?” you asked as he sighed. “I panicked, I didn't know what else to do…” you scuffed, shaking your head as you backed away and grabbed your stuff. “I can’t believe you Julian…you lied to me…you swore you never would.” you shook your head. “Whoa, you lied to me too.” Julian said as you looked appalled at him. “Are you kidding me? I didn’t lie to you, Julian. I WAS pregnant when I left. I took the damn test. And guess what? I rehearsed through the miscarriage, I performed when and where I needed to, so now I can go around and buy $30,000 bottles of Rum to impress someone I was head over heels in love with, in the hopes that I might get a tiny taste of what I used to have in life before I lost it all!” you yelled before you stormed out.

[melk-maid]

also me vs this probably sbr announcement vs my intense disdain for the jjba fandom but i want to enjoy more than just the source material