#btw yes i said the rat was burnt
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cringebro · 2 months ago
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Trust me you dont wanna read this its really disgusting but i gotta get it outta my system
Tell me tell me tell me why my mum just found a hidden place inside a cabinet that was full of rat shit and a burnt rat
And it chewed on a aluminium pipe
Im having trouble processing this
I threw away the bag full of rat shit and corpse and honestly it was quite disgusting
I washed my hands 3 times in 1 go but i dont think im ever mentally recovering from that
Im still doing the same face as the 🤢 emoji
I genuinely might throw up
I have tears in my eyes
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sixosix · 11 months ago
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HAIIIIIIIIII!!! how r u bookie bearrrr! i just finished rereading thawed andddd i have some reader(my reader) headcanons to give u<33
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1) reader w an eyepatch!! yknow, from ch 2 where she sneaked on a mission and got burnt,,, it could be a scar under there or maybe she cant see in that eye but idk yet
2) her rat tail-ish hair!! i hc that when she was young, she really idolized arlecchino and growed her hair so they could match... and so heres the juicy part. lyney notices that when they spar, reader's hair kind of gets in the way bc its only kept by one singular hair tie. but she still slays tho so it wasnt really a problem but lyney is a simp so he begged lynette to teach him how to braid (i hc lynette does his braids) so that he can braid reader's hair. and after like weeks of him offering her to braid her hair, she finally lets him. after that, lyney would always braid her hair when he sees it bothering her orrr she sometimes(like, maybe 3 times) approaches him first to do her hair (bro was over the moon trust me)
that why it is now her default hairstyle(maybe its for closure,,,)
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3)her vision is as close to her as possible bc its the only thing that gives her worth,,,
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4) columbina. thats it, thats the tweet.
5) i forgor to draw it but i also hc that she wears gloves when she goes out bc some of those scars dont look like it comes from plants,,,
her design isnt actually final bc im still unsatisfied, like, stuff is not blending in yk like ah basta ganon WHAHAHSGJAH the first pic might look ike shit bc my tablet is not resonating w me so apologies..
i will now proceed to, once again, reread thawed bc it has become my daily therapy<3
have a nice day!!
OH MY GOSH AKAGI I WAS SO EXCITED WHEN I SAW U IN MY INBOX LIK.E. omfg. AND U NEVER FAIL TO HAVE ME IN AWE. your concept of thawed!reader is SO so genius--you get her so well its like we exchanged waves while thawed was in the works.
THE EYEPATCH. i love that. I LOVE THAT. I LOVE THAT. i know u said u reread it but im actually so happy u take those scenes into mind
THE RAT TAIL HAIR. Hello. ure insane. ure a genius. youre fuckedup for that btw im hurt thats so sad and so cute. AND LYNEY LEARNING HOWTO BRAID FOR HER? bye. Im dead and gone.
the vision hc :( the worth line :( AHHHHHHHHHH How do u do it. its like u wrote thawed… AND COLUMBINA? absolutely yes. Thats canon. I, STILL NOT OVER THE RAT TAIL HAIRSTYL
tbh i keep tge readers appearance vague for the sake of staying true to its concept as a 'reader' fanfic but your hcs are so good that i feel the need to incorporate it in my series so bad. the need is so strong,,,, akagi what are u doing to me.... stop being so good.... YOUR READER IS CLAWING AT ME
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jar-of-ectoplasm · 4 years ago
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Beach Trip Headcanons: La Squadra
a/n: it's getting warmer where i live which is horrible and i hate it but it gave me some inspo here's some bullshit
Genre/Warnings: Crack, fluff, just some cute shit, polyamory (sorlato), a LOT of simping omfg
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~Risotto Nero~
-he already had his tits out on the regular so his bare chest isn't anything new but he lost that stupid hat so it wouldn't get wet and now you can stare at hat-less riz
-doesn't get in the water too often but he definitely goes underwater to grab your legs and scare you (he does it to ghiaccio and melone too; melone screams at the top of his lungs and ghiaccio fails around like he's drowning)
-spends most of his time under the parasols with illuso and prosciutto, just chatting and watching you mess around with your teammates (and maybe checking you out while he's at it)
-lowkey starts to get jealous if he thinks melone or formaggio are gettin' too friendly with you (god help any random person that flirts with you)
-Riz makes damn sure both you and him are very well saturated (?? does that sound weird) with sunscreen. there's no way in hell either of you will be suffering through that
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~Prosciutto~
-you thought you were going to the beach with your boyfriend? lmfao nah you're at the beach with mom and your rowdy ass siblings now
-came in clutch with the sunscreen, aloe vera ointment, snacks, water and spending money. has a very nice set up under a parasol with illuso (and you, if you'd like to join him in his relaxation/parenting session)
-pros with his hair down, shirtless and wearing a pair of pineapple swim trunks to match with pesci? out in public? a lot more likely than you'd think
-formaggio would be a prick and dump water on his hair and now you get to see prosciutto with his hair wet fUCK (pros would be FUMING but he'd look so GOOD)
-would read to you but he doesn't want to risk getting any of his fav books wet so he'd just tell you wonderful stories of the team before you joined (most of them are embarrassing for everyone but him)
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~Pesci~
-literally he's having the time of his LIFE right now. he's completely protected from the sun (thanks mamma pros), he's goin' fishing, he's got his s/o with him, what more could a boy ask for?
-maybe he should've asked formaggio to not throw sand at him every 10 minutes because that is happening for sure, no matter how much prosciutto yells at him to stop pesci will not be left alone
-is in the water like, 70% of the time. he'll make bets with ghiaccio to see who can swim out the farthest and ghia is surprisingly not mad when he loses
-he'll walk off the beach with just you to get ice cream and it's honestly really fucking cute (he gets strawberry, btw)
-pesci really likes picking you up and tossing you into the water. he's secretly a little bastard and will laugh at you while helping you up
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~Illuso~
-jesus the entire day with him is just 🙄. he's such a little bitch about EVERYTHING
-won't go in the water at all and carries a compact mirror with him so he has an escape plan in case formaggio decides to fuck with him. salt water damages your hair and there's no possible fucking way he's risking his scalp just for a little fun
-still insisted on wearing swim trunks and going shirtless though, mostly just to have your undivided attention (as if he didn't already force you to pay attention to him enough)
-sitting under parasols with prosciutto because he's pale and has sensitive skin but he still ends up getting sunburned and won't stop complaining
-you guys did have a cute little moment when the sun was starting to set and he dragged you away from everyone so he could look for sea glass with you (totally wasn't an excuse to hold your hand while he was dragging you around)
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~Formaggio~
-spends the entire day being a little rat bastard and making almost everyone wish he was dead (he respects risotto too much and sorbet and gelato scare him so he leaves them alone)
-throwing sand at pesci and melone, pouring water on prosciutto, stealing melone's goggles, chasing illuso into the mirror world, straight up throwing ghiaccio's car keys across the beach
-and of course he's gonna drag you into this. even if you just wanted to have a nice beach day with your asshole boyfriend, he's gonna hold you captive during his shenanigans
-can and will wipe his sweat on you. he thinks it's the funniest thing in the world. please throw seaweed at him in retaliation, he thinks it's nasty as fuck
-leaves the beach early so he can treat you to dinner, both as a thank you for dealing with his bullshit all day and as an apology for wiping sweat on you every 30 minutes
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~Ghiaccio~
-the most unrecognizable when he's as the beach with everybody. his hair isn't styled, so his curls are a lot looser and not plastered to his head, he's not wearing his glasses so they don't get lost in the water, HIS FUCKING LEGS AND BARE CHEST ARE JUST OUT
-literally just,,,SURFER GHIACCIO??? come ON dude. he knows what he's doing and will wink at you every single time he catches you staring
-loves wading out far into the water with you on his surf board so he can be all soft and cute with you without anybody hearing or seeing him
-he'll also be pretty light-hearted when he's out there too. he and pesci will see who can swim out the farthest and he'll let pesci win (let's be honest, with his legs he could swim to a different continent if he wanted too)
-ghia might look hot as hell out there, but he'll also end up burnt as hell. literally he just didn't put sunscreen on and he was out in the sun for hours. hottie got sun poisoning, please take him home early he will die
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~Melone~
-he brought along goggles, a snorkel and flippers so he can do some shallow reef diving
-he'll pop up occasionally and yell for you to come over and show you a tiny little crab or a cool looking fish he found (it's honestly really, really cute)
-mel will take routine breaks to reapply sunscreen, drink water, check up on you, and get his goggles stolen (which he did not plan on). he'll also take this time to use shitty beach-related pick up lines to get you to laugh
-honestly as pervy as you'd think he would be. maybe it's because he's distracted by all the fun little creatures he keeps finding in tide pools and such
-has his own little set up a few feet away from prosciutto and illuso's. he'll be there while he's taking his breaks and yes he will try to cuddle with you even though it's pushing 90 degrees at noon
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~Sorbet and Gelato~
-not to get sad in what is supposed to be a fun headcanon set but neither of them will take their shirts off or get in the water. both of them have a lot of body image issues and they'd really appreciate it if you didn't try to convince them to be half naked in public
-with that being said, both Sorbet and Gelato get loads of enjoyment out of just watching you swim around and have fun before returning to them
-Sorbet will help apply sunscreen but he really just wants an excuse to grope you and Gelato in public
-Gelato will want to have a sandcastle building contest with you (Sorbet is the judge and both of you receive the grand prize of a kiss)
-long walks on the beach together at night after everyone's gone home? of fucking course it's gonna happen
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