#btw is the place for e and anti androgens

[straight-to-the-pain]

(There’s also a transfem guide btw)

I’m not in the US so I don’t know what the laws around around T possession without a prescription there (and they likely vary by state) but hypothetically speaking, possessing a vial of T for personal use is not going to be the authorities’ biggest problem and I can’t say I’ve heard of anyone getting into serious trouble for it in the community. Obviously, you should be aware of the risks and how you particular marginalisation can amplify those risks (we know Black men in the us are disproportionately criminalised for possession of drugs) but DIY T is real and out there :)

As a trans guy I'm really worried about maintaining access to T. I live in a safe state but I know how quickly things can change in a matter of months to years, so.. I'm worried. That being said, what do you know of DIY HRT? I know that cis guys sometimes use T and I doubt they always go through their doctor, so I'm curious how that works.

I don't want to have to do this, but I figured I should at least know the gist of it should I ever need to or if someone I know is in the same situation.

P.S thank you for being here for everyone who has questions. It means a lot 🩵

As a fellow trans guy, I feel you. Note that while the following looks like advice, it is for educational purposes only, and you are using this information at your own risk.

The following is listed from least to most illegal:

Probably your absolute best bet (especially if you pass) is to get a doctor that can prescribe T for male hypogonadism (low T). Now, this is probably not going to be an in-person doctor for two reasons. One is that they will probably do a testicular exam, which will give things away. Second, most electronic medical records link up these days, so any doctor treating you will be able to pull your medical records and find out you're trans.

One possible way around this is telehealth, which has boomed since the pandemic. Try googling "male hypogonadism telehealth" to check around for options. This will probably need to be paid out of pocket under a fake name if you want to ensure your account isn't linked. Make sure you know the symptoms of male hypogonadism, or come up with a story about how you're already diagnosed because you had mumps as a kid or something. Note that if they ask for a blood test, which they probably will, and you're not already out of T, skip your dose and take the test a few days later, so you test low. The nice thing about this is it gets you a diagnosis that can only be gotten if you're AMAB, so it lends credibility to your situation.

The next option is to stockpile some T while you still have access to it. Because T is controlled, the most T you can have in your possession is a 6-month prescription (otherwise you risk a 4th degree felony). However, if the prescription is written for 1-ml vials and your dose is 0.5ml/week and the prescription says to "discard vial after 1 dose" you can technically have up to a year (because in theory, you're throwing away 0.5ml of T each time you inject- but you could also, in theory, keep it and use it as long as you were careful to clean the top with alcohol before you puncture it). Keep in mind that even if you happen to get more T than a year's worth, it's only good for about 3 years before it starts losing potency or may become contaminated.

The (far) next option is to find someone in the bodybuilding community and start asking around. Making it clear that you know how to do injections will get you to people who have T that they don't want to self-inject but may trade you (or at least sell to you) for doing their injections. This is your best bet for finding illegal T. Note that T is a (pretty dang) controlled substance. You and everyone involved in getting T to you is at significant legal risk (that 4th degree felony again).

Unfortunately even looking in the dark recesses of reddit I was not able to find a safe "recipe" for testosterone. Most of what is suggested is to buy T powder from overseas and compound it yourself into a cream. This is very very illegal and could be very dangerous if you don't do it correctly. I'm not going to talk about it here because I don't understand it enough. Also it's really freaking illegal.

Note: If you haven't yet had a hysterectomy, I suggest you do everything in your power to keep a functioning ovary. That way if you do lose access to T, you won't lose bone density. If you have already gotten your ovaries removed, talk to a doctor about low-dose hormones to maintain bone density.

[carolinelayt]

As World Rugby’s working group, which had many members belonging to anti-trans group “Fair Right For Women”, ascertains transgender women’s rights to play rugby through studies which are questionable science and yet, we, the common people outside the working group, have not seen the hidden studies used.

My sources tell me one study was apparently used and highlighted by Kirsti Miller’s tweet, and this study didn’t even reference transgender sports women among its studied group of participants.

I’m a former trans woman rugby representative player/sprinter and yet my informative lived rugby experience was never sought by the rugby powers that be, so I’ve documented my own personal best times from when I was a 13-year-old child and long before I began my feminisation transition at age 30 to when I finished competing as a female Masters sprinter aged-50.

My competing for St Joseph’s College, Hunter’s Hill Open 4 x 400 metre relay at AAGPS Annual Athletics meeting

In this article I’d like to focus on my sprinting background.

My PB as a male sprinter over 100 metres – 11.28 (hand timed and included below) and this was over 2 seconds faster than my PB as a female sprinter 13.54 at the 2002 Sydney Gay Games (electronic-which is included directly below).

The further the distance, the slower my pre-transition times comparatively became, ie 200 metres 23.70 (ht) as compared to 28.14 (e) and 400 metres 50.80 (ht) to 68.00 (e) post-transition.

My (K. Layt) running Open 100 metres Division for Joeys at GPS Athletics meet 1983, 11.70 secs, not my PB but still competitive and much faster than my female PB

1980 – around the time when I ran my then PB of 13.30

My competing at Athletics NSW Masters Championships 2003. My time was a wind affected 13.96. Note my female body post-transition and I finished 3rd to two cis-gender women

(Photos above: Athletics NSW 100 metre W35 podium – Gold Jackie Bezuidenhout 13.59, Silver Julianne Miles-Brown 13.78, Bronze Caroline Layt 13.96 … I was beaten fair and square by two cis-gender women athletes and on the left I was 14 years 10 months and was running similar times to my female self at 37. I’d only gone through about 9 months of puberty at that time.)

My 100 metre PB as a female athlete is very similar to my PB at 14 years 10 months and at that age I was very early into the male puberty I endured as a young teenager and the photos directly below show my physical state when these times were recorded.

My pre-pubescent times during Year 8 over 100 (15 secs) and 400 metres (1 min 10 secs) – I was aged-13 years 6 months. Not long after this, puberty hit and my times skyrocketed

This indicated I had lost endurance rather quickly after my transition and Gender Affirmation Surgery.

In terms of strength I lost almost a third of my strength bench pressing 1 repetition max – 115kgs as a male athlete (photos directly below when I was bench pressing heavy weights for my size) as compared to the 70 kgs I lifted as a female athlete.

I was still competing and ran low 11 secs around the time this photo was taken

My testosterone filled 18-year-old-self

2 years pre-transition – Performing exhibition Step routine s a group fitness instructor, I could bench press 115 kgs 1 rep max

Aerobics competitor

Years later when I was at the other end of the testosterone scale (0.4 nmols) I had to give  up my sprinting after the 2016 season, as I was no longer competitive.

My decline of fast twitch fibre and athletic prowess was swift and at age 46 my speed had declined rather quickly and I was running well over 15 seconds for the 100 metres.

Within two years (2010 – W44 years to 2012 – W46 years) I went from 14.20 to 15.74 seconds over 100 metres at the Australian Masters Athletics championships 100 metre heats in Melbourne, which is a far cry from my 13.73 equal-4th placing recorded at the same event only eight years earlier.

By 2012 there were early signs my training as a sprinter was making me unwell due to a lack of testosterone in my body.

I tried to make a comeback to sprinting in 2018 but it made me feel too unwell.

So I now play technical sports such as cricket, throwing and have recently taken up lawn bowls.

I’ve been androgen (testosterone) deficient for some time now and I have to take andro-femme cream to have any semblance of normal health, as it brings my testosterone levels up to a reasonable female level (4 nanomols) from an unacceptable level (0.4 nanomols).

Another thing occurred around this time and my endocrinologist Dr Jon Hayes  who primarily cared for trans patients, had to endure his own personal witch-hunt by the NSW Medical Board and along with hundreds of his trans patients, I had to find a new doctor.

It just indicates how trans people are on the nose when it comes to the “top end” of society and the only we can get ahead is to pretend to be cisgender-heteronormative.

And even cis-het people can be persecuted if they “overstep their boundaries” in caring for us.

(Listed below are my PB times when I ran as a sprinter pre and post my first puberty. It also covers my times as a female masters track and field athlete after my 2nd feminising puberty (which btw corrected the masculinising effects of my first unwanted puberty.)

I’m not the only athlete whose times have slowly disintegrated over a period of time after a feminising transition, as can be seen from Kirsti Miller’s tweet below.

Ms Miller and I were personally educated by fellow Transgender advocate and sportswoman Kristen Worley about our own health needs, including an androgen deficient body which has no receptors to naturally produce testosterone.

She’d already been through it and was a perfect educator.

Ms Worley famously took the IOC to court and won. 

https://twitter.com/KirstiMiller30/status/1288274874390024193

Both Ms Miller and Ms Worley require the same medication I use and the aforementioned Ms Miller now has osteoporosis which can be seen from the photos below.

On the left an unhealthy Ms Miller around her partner Nikki Phillips’ Aussie Rules playing group and (pic-right) when she was healthy playing the game in 2013.

Recently transitioned Juniper Eastwood has already noticed differences to her strength, power, endurance and energy levels.

Her coach in University of Montana’s Head Track and Field coach Brian Schweyen said, “June just loves competing and running,”

“There’s no set standard on where she should be because there’s not enough studies, but it’s pretty clear she is nowhere near where Jonathan was.”

And this so proves after taking feminising hormones performance does decrease over a period of time and June can expect to lose more of the above over the coming years.

I do agree there should be a case-by-case basis for allowing transgender women to compete in sport, as I indicated in my Channel 9 interview.

My Max Vo2 test (35.5ml.O2 per minute – well within female range) and being allowed to compete in athletic competitions in 2003 by Athletics NSW and my sports doctor.

As I have stated many times there shouldn’t be a blanket ban as World Rugby’s working group suggests is required, but I agree transgender women need to be held to standards playing a contact sport and these include the IOC guidelines, ie feminising hormonal intervention, but Gender Affirmation Surgery shouldn’t be the basis, although I believe the nanomol allowance level should be higher than the 5 nanomols it is at present.

Around 8 to 10 nanomols is a reasonable level for transgender sports women to compete successfully in sport.

I do, however, believe in fairness for all people and playing sport is a universal human right and it’d be nice if some people, who I believe have far too much say in the development of sports policy, would disassociate their own bias and prejudice with the process when making these policy decisions.

And Ross Tucker’s tweet below indicates how little he misses the point and doesn’t understands transgender women by calling us “males”.

He’s prominent among the working group – front and centre alongside another anti-trans group “Fair Play For Women – who also call trans women “biological males”.

Not at all. So what’s the hypothesis here? That by 2056 science will have shown that males are in fact not superior at sport? I’d take that bet for sure. In time, evidence may emerge to show advantages are totally removed. Right now that doesn’t exist, but safety risks do

— Ross Tucker (@Scienceofsport) July 28, 2020

On any given day you can find a 50 kilo difference between the biggest, strongest athlete on a rugby pitch and the smallest, most skilled athlete whether it’s women’s rugby or men’s rugby. Should we ban scrum halves? Or should we ban the big folk?

— RugbySmash (@smash_rugby) July 28, 2020

https://twitter.com/CarolineLayt/status/1288339014664065024

I believe Tucker’s close-minded mindset will never change and I hope this lived-experience of mine and others as transgender athletes will help people understand we’re not men in dresses like the stereotypes portray and we can be involved in sporting teams like the many I’ve been involved with since I began playing women’s sport in 2002.

Further, I’d like to share a post by a member of the working group who wasn’t happy with the going-ons in the room.

And on that note I’d like to show them what a trans athlete looks like, of which according to my source above, many of the people in the Working Group had no idea about.

We don’t look like the men these anti-trans groups say we are and after a feminising transition which includes hormone therapy (which takes our levels duplicating a false pregnancy), electrolysis, anti-androgens and for some of us Gender Affirmation Surgery we are anything but male.

Kirsti – post-transition and surgery in Thailand

2014 – Caroline with Johnston & James throws pentathlon trophy

When I was running around the high 13/low 14 second mark over 100 metres, note my female body on the left after a feminising transition

Caroline – Journalist Interview for Hatch – 2018

Kirsti – post-transition and surgery in Thailand

Sorry, but not sorry for this cheeky photo from 1999 … we’re going to party like it’s 1999!

Caroline – 1998 – just after Gender Affirmation Surgery

    Trans woman rugby player/sprinter shares her lived experience as World Rugby’s working group proposes a transgender women’s rugby player ban As World Rugby's working group, which had many members belonging to anti-trans group "Fair Right For Women",