#bruncle thor

[jivewise]

i’m going to forever maintain the headcanon that hela is loki’s birth mother (in the mcu)

first off don’t get me wrong, i don’t think odin or frigga or thor would love loki more for being blood related or anything like that. there’s just some great irony in him being related after all

as others have pointed out, hela knew about the loss of odin’s eye even though it happened during the war against the jotuns, meaning she had to have either gotten loose from her prison around then or was imprisoned right after

loki was born at the end of the war

ergo hela was not in prison around when loki was born

ergo squared that hela = loki’s birth mother (aka my headcanon)

“the house of odin is full of traitors” yeah no kidding, starting with my mans odin (and frigga)

lockin up their kiddo hela. i guess banishing her to earth wasn’t an option because she’d just slaughter everyone even as a mortal without her powers

anyway they check in on her once a century and um, doesn’t look like she’s getting any less.. less

they still have her baby tho.. our baby? insert marxist bugs bunny meme

and when loki looks asgardian it’s because he is asgardian, it’s not an illusion or whatever. he’s a shapeshifter, jan

so for the most part odin and frigga can ignore the jotun part of the equation

odin holding off on telling loki about his heritage was because he wiped the realms of hela’s memory, so couldn’t without explaining hela (or lying even more). laufey being the dad’s really just an afterthought

like what would he even say?

“hey kid. you’re adopted. also your dads the king of our mortal enemies. also your moms another of our mortal enemies”

“don’t worry, she’s also my daughter”

“locked her up and erased everyone’s memory of her tho. lol”

“why? what do you mean, why? did you listen to a single word i said?”

frigga’s modus operandi is leaving the family chat on read

loki chooses green as his it color and odin starts sweating

loki weaponizes public transportation and odin knows there’s no going back

meanwhile, thor is taking on hela’s old mantle of asgard’s next big imperialist while odin and frigga aren’t looking

ok and loki being odin and frigga’s adopted grandson who they pretend they’re not biologically related to is just funny

and tragic because of the consequences

ironically this would also mean loki is varying degrees of responsible for killing both of his birth parents

on top of his adopted parents

who are his grandparents

and loki’s ascension to a throne getting subverted is also funny, since, assuming hela’s the ruler of helheim, technically that makes loki a potential heir to 3/9 realms

4/9 if frigga has any claim to vanaheim’s throne.. idk if that’s how norse succession even worked but they’re aliens, jan

also hela/laufey is a totally valid hateship, brought together by their mutual lust for power and resentment of odin all-father, plus the impact of odin and frigga themselves, giving rise to a child that becomes both a balm to and bane of asgard

the peace that odin intended for loki to bring wasn’t between asgard and jotunheim alone. it was between hela and her family

and perhaps the reason why he gave up on those aspirations was because he gave up on being able to reach hela.. being old was taking up too much of his energy anyway

just… clenches fists too tightly for anyone to pry this headcanon from my cold dead hands