#brothers (2009) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

charliehoennam · 5 months ago

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love in disguise.

a/n: request (and lil moodboard!!!!) made by @harmonity-vibes. isn't she the fucking cutest?!

summary: after being swindled into a one-night-stand with his best friend, he learns the truth and the consequences that one night had.

pairing: tommy cahill x f!reader

warnings: language, a lil smut if you squint hard, angst, noncon activities, sleeping with someone under false identity, mentions of pregnancy, lying.

SHARING IS CARING, REBLOG IF YOU LIKE IT

Walking through the grassy field, you took a deep breath to try and ease the churn of your stomach. You knew this was so wrong in so many ways and you couldn’t let this happen to Tommy.

Lisa was always known for being one of the prettiest and most popular girls since as long as you could remember.

Her perfect smile and bright eyes had boys drooling over her. Her poised and polished attitude had their parents swooning and eager to set their sons up with her. Her high grades filled teachers up with pride and joy every single test.

Despite having similar physical traits and even being mistaken for her sometimes, you felt you could never amount to her – especially when you noticed how deflated or uninterested people instantly became realizing you weren’t her.

She couldn’t fool you though. After years of growing up alongside her, you knew she was anything but the sweet and perfect little role model she led people to believe.

You knew just how vindictive and manipulative she could be to anyone who wronged her or simply to get whatever she wanted. That was how she managed to snag Tommy Cahill, known for sweet-talking his way out of any trouble he got caught in.

Tommy was much different than his older brother. Sam was an overachiever. He had the smarts, discipline and charm that had every father hoped his daughter would marry.

When he enlisted in the military after high school, it seemed like town’s respect for him simply skyrocketed, leaving Tommy behind in his shadow.

Although Sam was the charming and intelligent brother, Tommy was the exciting bad boy that had girls daydreaming. His dopey smile and big blue eyes had turned you into one of those girls.

When Lisa introduced him to you as her boyfriend, your heart sank. You didn’t really think you had much of a shot with him, but you couldn’t help wonder what he saw in her or if he knew that the sweet hand-written letters and notes she would sneak into his locker were actually written by you under her persuasive command.

You ended up befriending your high-school crush instead and remained just as that ever since then.

When you realized how much he genuinely loved her, you accepted that he would never see you more than a friend.

It may not have been exactly what you wanted, but you settled for being his friend because he was just great at it. He loved making people laugh and you could trust him with things that you couldn’t even think about sharing with Lisa.

The love you had for him was exactly what made you feel so awful when you learned how unfaithful Lisa’s been to Tommy years after. Not just by lying to him and pretending to be someone she wasn’t whenever he was around, but her betrayal has become physical and you couldn’t stand for it.

That was the real reason you agreed to go to the town’s birthday bash. The theme, that year, was masquerade and inspired by Mardi Gras. Almost everyone looked to the town’s birthday bash because it consisted of great good, cheap drinks and lots of music and fun.

Tommy had been looking forward to the event and kept asking Lisa to go over and over again, but she’d always tell him that she wasn’t sure if she’d be able to make it because of work.

The truth was that she had planned a romantic getaway with her lover to spend some quality time together after their conflicting schedules finally lined up. Because of that, Lisa had the bright idea of you meeting up with Tommy in her place. She figured you looked a lot like each other and he’d be too drunk to notice the difference.

You refused and told her that it was wrong. It wasn’t like you were twins playfully taking each other’s place in high school. This was her boyfriend, who would most likely be physically affectionate with someone that he didn’t consent to.

Used to getting what she always wanted, she then threatened to spread your intimate selfies she had stolen from your phone. Although you couldn’t believe it, you knew her too well to know what she was capable of to get what she wants.

Her threat had your blood boiling with rage. You decided she’d gone too long getting her way all the time.

“Enough is enough,” you told yourself.

Tommy was a good guy and he deserved to know the truth. Everyone deserved to know the truth about who she really is, and you were done lying on her behalf.

You repeated that in your mind as you marched your way to the music stage.

Though your intimate photos could certainly ruin your reputation living in a town as small as yours, you accepted the possible consequences as along as the truth could come out. You could always move and settle down elsewhere if it came to it.

The fair was already crowded by the time you arrived. People in festive, colorful and bejeweled masks roamed around the tents set up with games, food and speakers to fill the air with local music.

You frowned to yourself as people you barely or never spoke to waved at you or lifted their drinks towards you as you passed. Clearly, they must have mistaken you for Lisa.

First, Mrs. Mulberry. She always never remembers your name and only greets you when you’re out with one of your parents.

Secondly, there was Nate. He never really talked to you, unless it was to get one of your friends’ number.

Then there was Mr. Dawson. He always mistook you for Lisa when he saw you around town and facepalmed himself when you corrected him.

You knew, in the back of your mind, that this was not real. They weren’t greeting you; they were greeting Lisa. But for once, just once, it felt so good to walk in her shoes. To be loved, seen and smiled to by everyone that walked past you.

Weaving through the crowd that engulfed the largest park in town, you saw his familiar silhouette from afar. He stood watching a band playing off to the side of the closed road, beer in his large hand. His head bounced along to the music as his foot tapped along to the bass.

As you walked towards him, your hand reached up about to remove the black and silver mask Lisa demanded you wear and you watched him turning towards you.

Feeling your presence, he turned and your insides melted from the bright grin he flashed towards you, stilling your hand and letting the mask remain in place.

In that moment, you felt the blood rush in your veins, traveling in time to the shy high-school you again – only this time you were his.

Like a deer in headlights, you drifted over the grass fully expecting him to recognize you. The grassy ground beneath you felt like clouds grazing over plains with steady ease.

“You made it!” he chuckled raising his hands to your cheeks, pulling you into a heart-stopping kiss. “I was starting to think you were gonna stand me up.”

It couldn’t have last longer than a couple seconds, but you were almost certain the world had completely stopped on its axis and sent you into the neverending black abyss of floating cold.

The lack of gravity that grounded you seeped into your mind with the wordless spell he suddenly had you under. Bewitched by his kiss, all self-control had successfully been drained.

“I-”you started to speak, but he cut you off.

“Come check out this band! They’re actually from Louisiana!”

His bright blue eyes gleamed with an excitement that may have been heightened by the alcohol he was drinking.

Every word you were about to speak would be cut off by a remark on the band’s talent or a question about the fair, leaving you to burn up in the mesosphere between morality and desire with every kiss he surprised you with.

Although you knew it wasn’t right, you gave in to the lie and decided to rain ash over the land of repressed dreams and desires you had forced yourself to shield over the years with heavy clouds of selflessness for a single night.

Diving into the night head first, you went along with the lie throughout the night and washed its bitter taste in your throat with drinks. You didn’t think it would’ve gotten as far as him taking you back to his apartment.

Tommy was just as drunk as you were and unable keep his hands or his lips off you.

The alcohol in your bloodstream numbed you from reality and welcomed you warmly into an ocean of pleasure you’d longed for like a drought riddled desert welcomes an endless rain.

Cocooned in his warm touches and hungry kisses, you made your home there for a couple of hours. The thought of having him inside you, filling you up with a delicious stretch, had your panties drenched.

You had always wanted him to yourself and – believing the vigorous use of your birth control which you made sure to never forget – you made the decision to be a little selfish and indulge in a one-night stand.

You insisted that you both kept your masks on to add to the fun you shared in his bed and Tommy happily went along with it.

Looking over the drunken slumber that he quickly slipped into, you sat on the edge of his bed and admired his features that seemed so gentle and soft at the moment. You ached to reach out and caress every single one of them, to show how appreciated they deserved to be.

But you stopped yourself with your hand in midair.

The silence of his bedroom was so loud as guilt and disgust with yourself trickled in your mind through slow sobriety.

With tears quickly building in your vision, you quietly gathered your clothes from his bedroom floor and sneaked out of his room to dress quickly in the living room.

Shoes in hands, your feet pattered against the cold sidewalk as you paced through dark streets as if you could run from your guilt.

Despite that one-night stand with Tommy, you later found out that it had been in vain. Lisa’s affair was brought to his attention when a neighbor had mentioned seeing her with someone she had introduced as his cousin Adam at a diner on the outskirts of town. Only he didn’t have a cousin named Adam.

Tommy went into a downward spiral after that. Drinking and substance abuse had become his escape and way of coping with the pain as he felt it was the only thing that could numb him enough to go about his day.

Watching him go down that path wasn’t easy. Watching the strip on your pregnancy test turn blue was even harder. Although you tried to help him however you could, you knew you couldn’t tell him the truth about that night out of fear that it could be the last drop to push him over the edge into consequences no one could bring him back from.

When you heard about him going off to jail for armed robbery, you were surprised and couldn’t believe he would really do such a thing.

Tommy was always so kind-hearted; you refused to believe it until you watched him confess to the crime remorsefully in court. The way he couldn’t even look at the poor victim just proved that it was true.

Despite it all, Tommy was still your friend and you decided to not give up on him like other people, including his own dad, had.

Over the constant e-mails and letters you wrote back and forth, he shared how prison had been actually helping him sober up; that the classes he’d been taking helped him become more aware and clear-minded. You were happy for him and anxious to see him, so you decided to pay him a visit.

What Tommy hadn’t expected was to see you with a large swollen belly. Needless to say, he was shocked but overall happy for you as he bombarded you with questions about how far along you were, what was the gender of the baby, why you hadn’t shared the amazing news with him before.

As your friend, he was just genuinely thrilled because he knew you’d make a great mother. Aside from that, Tommy always knew he wanted to have kids and he had a way with them since as long as you could remember.

You knew he deserved to know the truth. You tried to tell him many times; the crumpled drafts of letters you decided not to send him were proof of your attempt to be honest.

But the words just weighed like rocks in the back of your throat, dropping to your stomach to infect you with their burden and ripple out with waves of sickness.

He was doing so well, getting cleaned and focusing on his future, making plans to be better.

Struck by the familiar fear of ruining his life even more, you opted to stay silent and to lie about the baby’s father, telling him and everyone else that asked that the man was just someone you’d met at a bar.

It’s been a few years since that night and all you have to remember it by is your memory… and your now 4-year-old so, Charlie.

When you heard he was finally out of jail and clean, you strongly believed it was the right time to tell him the truth. You owed him that much.

You hung a bit after he was free, occasionally meeting up for a coffee either at a coffee shop or at your place.

When you were finally ready to come clean, he told you about Sam’s disappearance that had been ruled a death which quickly changed your mind again.

You didn’t see much of him after that since he had decided to concentrate on his family. You remembered how he talked about Grace; about how pretty and what a great mother she is; how amazing she is for letting him reconnect with his nieces.

Once again, you felt the invisibility swallowing you back into its depths. He would never look at you as anything more than just a friend.

Although it hurt to accept, you figured it was the push you need to tell him. Until Sam came home.

His family really went through with Sam after he didn’t come home the same Sam that everyone knew and loved.

Out of respect for them, you decided to distance yourself again from Tommy. Everything you learned about him and his family, like Sam’s mental breakdown or his admittance in a mental institution for war veterans or his return home, was from rumors and word of mouth that spread through the town.

It’s a sunny fall morning and orange, brown and yellows leave are sprinkled over your mother’s lawn as you rake them up into piles over the front yard while Charlie draws on the driveway with his colorful chalk.

“Mommy, I maded me and you! Come see!” Charlie shouts excitedly as his little legs race over to tug on your shirt.

“Alright, I’m going” you chuckle holding the rake in one hand and his little hand in the other.

Your compliment on his drawing earns you a bright smile from him as you bend at the hip to kiss his head until the sound of crunching leaves catch your attention.

“Uncle Tommy!” Charlie cheers quickly dropping his chalk as he races towards Tommy.

“There’s my favorite little man!” Tommy quickly sets the decorated gift bag down on the driveway to lift Charlie up and give him a proper hug. “I hear you’re kicking butt in karate. You gonna teach me a couple moves, huh?”

“Uh huh! I learn how to pushkit!” Charlies responds proud of himself.

“What’s pushkit?” Tommy frowns confused.

“He means push kick. You push and kick at the same time” you smile intervening. “It’s how he’s opening doors now.”

“That sounds useful,” Tommy chuckles setting Charlie back on the ground to pick his gift bag up and steps closer to you. “How you doing, sweetheart?”

“Pretty good” you nod. “Haven’t seen you around in a while.

“Yeah, that’s on me… Just been going through some family drama. ‘m sure you’ve heard about it already. Word travels fast here.”

“It does, yeah. You uh wanna come inside?”

“I’d love that” he nods with a smile.

After telling your son to come inside to wash up for lunch time, you lead the boys into the house.

“Your mom around? I brought you guys a gift too.”

“No, she’s at some pottery club with her friends today.”

“Mommy, can I has my pwesent?” Charlie asks tugging on your hand, big blue eyes shining up at you.

“Yeah, baby. Of course. I’ll let uncle Tommy give it to ya, while I make us chicken nuggets.”

“Oh, sweet. Can I stay for lunch too?” Tommy grins setting the bag on the kitchen counter to pull out Charlie’s gift.

You nod at him with a smile and remind him he’s always welcome in your house.

Leading Charlie into the living room to open his gift, you notice the size of the wrapped present that already has his eyes wide with excitement.

Watching from the kitchen as you prepare lunch, you smile listening to Charlie’s endless thank you’s as he unwraps and finds his brand-new doctor playset kit.

“I remember you said you wanna be a doctor, right?” Tommy smirks widely at the boy. “Lemme open it for you.”

Tommy is more than patient as he untwists the plastic ties that keep all the fake equipment in place.

“Can I be your first patient?” he asks playing along with the young child’s imagination. “I think I got a problem with my shoulder. It’s been hurting a lot and I really need to get it checked out by a doctor.”

“Ok,” Charlie smiles taking the placing stethoscope from the box to put it on. He holds the end part of it to Tommy’s back and asks him to breathe, remembering what the doctor does to him every time he goes there.

“Now I has to check your eyes and-and your mouth too.”

“And the ears too right?”

“Yeah, the ears too!” Charlie nods.

Tommy smirks as he glances at you from where he’s sat in the living room floor, letting Charlie use the fake stethoscope to listen to his back.

The whole scene takes you away for a moment and makes you feel like you’re really just watching a father and his son spending quality time together. It also makes you feel even worse for having kept this secret from him for so long.

“Ok, you got just a boo-boo here” Charlie emphasizes pointing to Tommy’s shoulder. “So you need is a mommy kiss because a mommy kiss make all the boo-boos go away.”

“Do I need a prescription for that?”

“Yeah!”

Charlie looks around for anything he can write down on and takes the notepad from beside the residential phone to scribble down “mami kizz” on a sheet of paper before tearing it from the spine to hand the note to Tommy.

“You can ask my mommy cause hers is the bestest,” Charlie replies squatting down to take the plastic needle from the box.

“Will do, doc” tommy smirks as he stands up. “Thank you.”

Lost in his own little word, Charlies takes all his favorite stuffed animals and action figures and lines them up on the couch while Tommy walks over to the kitchen.

“Got a prescription for a kiss, sweetheart. Doctor’s orders” he smiles sly at you.

You shake your head, not sure if he’s serious so you blow it off with a smile and thank him for the present.

“I got something for you too, you know,” he says digging into the paper bag.

You modestly refuse, telling him that he didn’t need to get you anything; that you’re just simply happy to see him. He won’t take no for an answer, so you give in and take the rectangular box from his hand.

You tug at the red ribbon to untie it and open the box to find a beautiful and delicate, simple necklace that you just know cost Tommy a lot of money.

“Tommy, this is too much. I-I can’t accept this” you say shaking your head as you look up at him in shock.

“No, don’t worry. I want you to have it, for all your help when I was in jail, for visiting me and all… I really appreciate that you didn’t forget about me and I wanted to get you something nice.”

“It’s nice, it’s really nice. But I can’t…”

“Why not?” he chuckles frowning at you. “My money ain’t good here?”

“No, that’s not it,” you start.

The words that form in your head start to weigh like stones in your throat. You try to swallow them down, but it’s time Tommy learned the truth. You just hope that he can take it.

As you begin to tell him the truth about that night, his face contorts with confusion and anger. You apologize over and over again, although it’s not nearly enough to make up for it, trying to explain how you felt you had no choice.

He shakes his head and takes a step back away from you like he doesn’t want to believe you would ever be capable of lying and betraying him.

“Nah, I don’t fucking believe that,” he frowns shaking his head. “How the fuck could you do that? I fucking trusted you and, all this time, you were fucking lying to me too?! All these fucking years?!”

His raised voice catches Charlie’s attention and has the young boy frozen in the middle of the living room.

As Tommy takes a deep breath to control himself, you both glance over at the young boy. While you make your way towards Charlie, Tommy takes in his physical features. He realizes the similarities and chuckles to himself, not out of amusement but out of disbelief.

You quickly rush to the living room and tell your son to go upstairs to play in your shared room. The big blue teary eyes that stare up at you in fear fill you regret for letting yourself get caught up in your own feelings that night.

Despite that fact that you love Charlie more than anything and would never regret having him, you do regret that you hid this secret from Tommy for so long. But you know how explosive he can be and you can’t let Charlie see that.

Charlie, as sweet and obedient as he always is, hesitates as he notices Tommy pacing back and forth in the kitchen to keep his calm.

He’s afraid and tells you he doesn’t want to leave his mommy, but you insist and tell him everything’s alright, asking him to check up on the other stuffed animals he’s got upstairs now that he’s a doctor.

Tommy sighs as he runs a hand over his face. As angry as he may be, the last thing he wants is for a child to see him as monster, let alone a child he’s really close to and could possibly be his.

“Everything’s ok, Charlie. Uncle Tommy just got a little mad, but everything’s ok,” Tommy says chiming in to reassure Charlie with a raised hand and a forced smile that you can see right through, but it’s enough to convince your son to go upstairs.

Walking to the stairs, he looks up the steps to make sure Charlie is out of the hearing radius before marching over to you.

“Is he mine?”

You go silent staring up at him, too afraid to tell him the truth.

The guilt bubbles inside you, weighing heavily in your chest. There’s nothing you can say to fix this.

Tears stream from your eyes. You keep swiping them away, but they don’t stop coming. You know nothing will be the same again between you and your best friend.

“Don’t fucking lie to me. I’m not fucking stupid. Is he mine?”

“Yes…” you whisper.

“Jesus,” he scoffs running over his large hand over the buzzcut he’s been sporting since he’s been out of jail. “I-I can’t even fucking look at you right now.”

“Tommy, I’m s-“ You can’t even finish your apology.

He’s already storming out and slamming the door behind him as you stand in the kitchen crying silently to yourself.

You feel worse about it with each passing day, staring at his contact on your phone, debating if you should try to reach out.

Tommy used to call you at least once a day, just to check up and make sure you and your family are doing ok. But, now? You can’t even get him to reply to your texts.

It’s been a couple months since your fallout and Tommy hasn’t been able to get your last encounter off his mind.

Watching his nieces play in their backyard makes him think about Charlie and how much he misses him. Even though he’s not sure he can forgive you so soon, he hates that Charlie has to suffer from it. He’s just a kid, his kid now. He’s not to blame.

Tommy didn’t realize how badly he always wanted to be a father until his nieces came into his life. Until he was locked in a cage, counting every second of his life that was going to waste.

Talking to Sam helped him put things into perspective and made it clear to him that he had a decision to make.

In the last of the ignored texts, you told him you could raise Charlie on your own as you have for the past few years. Being a father is a decision Tommy has to make on his own and whatever he decided, you would respect wholeheartedly.

He never replied, but he hasn’t stopped thinking about it feeling caught in between the violation and betrayal of his trust and his urge to be a father. It’s what he’s always wanted; to be a father that he wishes his could be, but he would’ve never thought that it would have to be like this.

As the dying leaves crunch under the weight of his heavy boots, he makes his way towards your house and knocks on the front door.

Setting plates and silverware on the table for dinner, your mom waves a hand at you and claims she’ll answer it assuming it must be one of the neighbors.

“Tommy! What a surprise.” she says greeting him with a smile.

“H-hi, ma’m. Sorry to drop in like this, I was hoping I could talk t-“

“I got it, ma. It’s alright.”

You walk toward the door, swapping places with your mom as she finishes setting the table.

You invite him to come in, but he shakes his head avoiding your eyes, so you step up out and close the door behind you.

Hugging the knit cardigan your mom made for you closer around your body, your arms fold across your chest. An awkward silence lingers in the chilly air. You feel like you’ve already said so much that already hurt him badly, so what else could you really say at this point?

“How’s Charlie doing? H-He ok?”

“Y-yeah, yeah. He’s ok,” you reply in a soft tone, hoping to avoid any more arguments. “Kinda misses you though. Asks about you from time to time.”

Tommy doesn’t say anything to that. He’s not really sure what to say. But the fact that he can barely even look at you fills you with hopelessness, so you try to brace yourself for the permanent goodbye he’s about to give you.

“I don’t know how long it’s gonna take me to get over what you told me… But I do know that I wanna be there for Charlie. I want him to grow up knowing that he’s got a dad who loves him no matter what.”

Surprised by his decision, you wonder if it has anything to do with his own father. If it could be Tommy simply wanting to be the father he wishes he had, or if it could be influenced by his desire to prove to his dad that he’s not a complete fuck-up.

“Yeah. Of course,” you nod quickly. “T-that’s absolutely fine by me. I think that would be good… You don’t have to worry about money though. I mean, you can help with whatever you can, but I don’t wanna make this about money. I just want you to do whatever you’re comfortable with.”

“I’m gonna help out with money obviously, but I wanna spend time with him… Take him out to the park, play ball and that sorta thing.”

“He would love that” you smile thinking about Charlie’s excitement.

“This is just for him though.”

You quickly drop your smile and nod as you look down at your feet, biting the corner of your mouth as you wonder if Tommy will ever be able to forgive you.

“Y-yeah… I get that. For Charlie.”

#tommy cahill #tommy cahill x reader #tommy cahill x you #tommy cahill x y/n #tommy cahill fic #tommy cahill imagine #tommy cahill fanfic #tommy cahill fanfiction #jake gyllenhaal #jake gyllenhaal fic #jake gyllenhaal imagine #jake gyllenhaal fanfiction #jake gyllenhaal fanfic #brothers 2009

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charliehoennam · 6 months ago

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from cramps to comfort

a/n: my bestie @harmonity-vibes has been having a bit of a tough day and i just wanted to make something nice for her. luv u, hon 💗

pairing: tommy cahill x f!reader

summary: you're on your period, everything sucks so tommy makes it his mission to help you feel better

warnings: mentions of blood, period, fluff, language, not proof-read

Getting off of work is the only thing you've been looking forward to the entire day. All you can think about is getting home and stewing yourself in a nice, hot bath to relief the aching cramps you’ve been feeling.

The day started off terribly wrong right off the bat. You had felt the cramps settling in the previous day and you even set a pad to try and prevent any accidents, but that was a total failure.

You woke up to the large red stain on your bedsheets and you just knew it was going to be one of those days.

As if the staining paranoia and the gut-twisting cramps weren’t enough to make you constantly uncomfortable, you also struggled to deal with your stupid fucking hormones.

Everything and everyone have been annoying or frustrating you for the past couple days. You hate that you feel like ripping everyone’s heads off and having their spleen for dessert. It’s not their fault; you’ve even managed to piss yourself off to the brink of tears. You just can’t help it.

You had no choice, but to brace yourself for the day. You thought about calling in sick, but you figured you could suck it up and face the day. It’d be over quickly and there was so much that you had to do.

After a hot shower to clean yourself up, you got dressed and took your phone from its charger by your nightstand in your rush to catch up with the clock.

Seeing Tommy’s name on the screen almost makes you forget about the pain.

“Morning, beautiful 🥰 Feeling better? Hoped we could have dinner together tonight?”

You read his message, but you have no time to write back. You’re running late thanks to your alarm and mother nature, so you scramble through your apartment to grab everything you could need.

The minute you lock your door, your phone starts buzzing. You lift it up to see who’s calling you and see your boyfriend’s face smiling back at you.

“Hey, Tommy”

“Morning, baby. You missed your alarm again?”

“Yeah, I think I forgot to set it last night. I really passed out, I was so tired.”

He can hear your footsteps going down the stairs as you make your way to the front entrance.

“Are you feeling any better though? You said you were feeling icky yesterday.”

“And now I know why. I got my period.”

“Oh, damn. I’m sorry, baby.”

“It’s not your fault, babe. Just Mother Nature being a bitch.”

“Is there anything I can d-“

“Fucking son of a bitch” you grumble as you push the stuck door to open. “Door never works. Sorry, babe. What did you say?”

“I asked if there’s anything I can do?”

“No, Tommy” you say holding your phone between your shoulder and your ear as you fish for your bus pass in your bag. “Fuck!” you groan. “Why can’t anything go right today?”

“What happened?”

“I gotta go back for my stupid fucking bus pass. I forgot it at home.”

“Baby, lemme give you a ride. I’m just a couple blocks over anyways.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be going to work? I don’t wanna make you late.”

“You won’t be, alright? Just wait there and I’ll pick you up, ok?”

“Alright, Tommy. Thank you so much.”

“See you in ten minutes, babe.”

You hang up and sit on the curb to wait for your boyfriend. The cold air tightens your muscles and you’re reminded of the pain in your core. You took medicine in your morning rush, but apparently, it wasn’t enough to numb it out entirely.

You sit and wait with your head tucked down over your arms. You’re so ready for the day to end.

Tommy soon arrives to pick you up as promised, but the wide grin on his face quickly disappears when he realizes how shitty you’re actually feeling.

It breaks his heart to see you in pain and feeling down in the dumps. He’s got a natural instinct for making people laugh and feel good. Not being able to do even that makes him feel useless.

It reminds him of the mental breakdown his brother went through years ago. Although he's gotten better and was able to return to his family a recovered man, depression hits him from time to time when he remembers what he had to endure.

Tommy never fails to cheer him up and remind him that he's a survivor. He might not be a doctor, but he does whatever he can to remind his loved ones that they are loved.

He listens to you vent on route to your workplace, making encouraging remarks when you mention your driving test is today during your lunch break. Tommy does his best to lift your spirits and reminds you of how well you’ve done during his lessons.

He’d been teaching you for the past couple weeks and, although he says you’ve improved a lot, you’re still nervous about the test because the instructor you were paired up with wasn’t exactly the friendliest of folks. It also didn’t help that Tommy is your boyfriend; he could be a little biased.

As you arrive at work, you thank him for the ride and kiss him good-bye. The hand he sets on your cheek makes you want to cancel the entire day just to be with him.

“Hey… All you gotta do is try the best you can today. And if it doesn’t go well, there’s always a tomorrow.”

His gentle voice chases your worries away.

“I know, baby. Thank you. Wish me luck?”

“All the luck in the world, sweetheart. Lemme know how it goes?”

“I will,” he pecks you once more before you climb out of his truck.

“Dinner at your place or mine?” he questions rolling the window down.

“Uhm, mine? Is that ok?”

“Fine by me, beautiful. Have a nice day. Love you!”

“Love you too” you chuckle and step back to let him roll the window back up. Tommy waits until you’re safely in the building to drive away.

Despite your best efforts, the day does not go as well as you had hoped.

The driving test was a total dud. Your instructor was a grade-A asshole. Your boss is riding you over some stupid report he managed to lose and accused you of not handing it in. Your insides feel like knives are churning in your walls. The headache you already took a second dose of painkillers after lunch still persists.

You can’t stop watching the clock and it seem that, as it gets closer to clock-out, time seems to go by even slower.

While you wither away at work, Tommy heads to the local drugstore. Standing the middle of the aisle, he stares at the vast variety of pads and tampons with a store basket in hand.

"What the f-" he whispers to himself as his eyes roam around in confusion. "Why does there have to be so many?"

His brows furrow like he's trying to build a spaceship. He picks one up to read the packaging. It might as well be in a foreign language because nothing makes sense to him.

He has no idea what difference between a pantyliner and overnight pad is. He doesn't understand why the tampons come in sizes.

Desperately confused, he whips his phone to dial his brother's number.

"Sam, hey! You got a minute?"

"Yeah. What's up?"

"I'm trying to get some lady shit for my girlfriend, but I don't understand any of this stuff."

"Yeah, I've been there before."

"Like how do i know what her size is? Is it like the size of her lady bits?"

"No," Sam chuckles. "It's according to her flow."

"How the fuck do i know that?"

"Just get the medium tampons when in doubt. And I'd suggest taking overnight pads. Some girls don't like sleeping with tampons."

"Alright. What are wings though? Should I get them with or without the wings?"

"They're like parts that open up and stick to the underwear, so it doesn't keep moving around. I always get the ones with wings."

Tommy nods and places the phone to hold with his shoulder as he grabs the products from the shelves and sets them in the basket.

"You should probably take some Pamprin too. Midol doesn't work for every girl."

"What the fuck is that?" he frowns.

"Medicine for cramps, Tommy. And my tip? When you're in her bathroom, take pictures of the brands she uses so you don't forget."

"Fuck, I didn't think of that. I gotta do that. Thanks, man."

With 5 minutes left of the extra hours you had to put in due to the driving test, you gather your things and head to the bathroom for a quick tampon change before starting your journey home on the bus.

You haphazardly wrap your scarf around your neck and hook your jacket on to finally make your long-awaited exit, thankfully the day is done.

The door flies open as you eagerly walk outside, but you freeze in your stride as you see Tommy standing in the parking lot, stood against his truck smoking a cigarette as he waits for you in the blistering cold.

He grins watching your face light up at the surprise.

“How long have you been waiting out here?”

“Not too long,” he lies. He’s freezing his balls off, but he doesn’t want to make you feel bad about it, especially since the intention was to surprise you. “I thought you could use a ride.”

“I most definitely can,” you nod walking towards him as he stomps his cigarette out.

He flashes a dopey smile as he cranes his head to kiss you hello. He tastes like smoke, but you don’t mind it. You’re just happy to see him and to feel his prickly beard on your skin.

“Got a couple things for you,” he smirks down at you.

“Oh? Like what?”

“You gotta get home and see,” he chuckles slyly.

You and Tommy had given each other a copy of your home keys as a special milestone in your relationship. It was a major step for him. His time in prison taught him to appreciate his freedom and personal space more, so allowing you to come and go freely meant he trusts you beyond comprehension.

“Just tell me there’s food. I really don’t wanna cook tonight.”

“There’s food, baby. I promise,” he smirks opening the passenger door to help you climb inside.

After a short straight drive home, you head up to your apartment and gasp as you walk inside.

On the table, you find a beautiful bouquet of flowers set in a pretty vase. That wasn’t there before. On the breakfast bar, you see you a box of pizza along with your favorite chips and chocolates all arranged neatly.

“There’s your favorite Ben & Jerry’s in the freezer too. And,” he pauses to walk over to the kitchen, grabbing a plastic bag off the counter. “I wasn’t sure what products you like better. I don't really understand this stuff but I got you medium tampons, night pads, Pamprin and some fuzzy socks,” he grins proudly. “I just thought they were cute.”

You laugh as you walk over to hug him, tears prickling at your eyes.

“Baby, this is so thoughtful. Thank you so much.”

“Are you crying?” he asks worriedly.

“Yeah, but to be fair, I’ve cried like three time today already. It’s beyond my control. I’m just so tired and in pain all the time.”

“Aw, baby. I’m sorry. That’s gotta be tough. Is there anything else I can do? I-I can run you a bath? Hot water helps, right?” You nod in agreement.

The bubble bath you soak in melts your pain away. It could just be the medicine working, but the warmth of the water provides the relief you’ve been seeking the whole day.

Looking over at the feminine products on the bathroom sink counter, you smile to yourself wondering how you had managed to get so lucky with Tommy.

He might be a little rough around the edges. He smokes, he curses like a sailor, he’s got a temper, but he also takes care of you so well unlike any of your exes ever have before or at least he tries to.

“How you doing in there, sweetheart?” he smiles, snapping you out of your thoughts as he leans in the doorway already dressed in his warm sweatpants and white t-shirt.

“This feels so fucking good. You have no idea.”

“I don’t mean to rush you, baby. But the pizza’s all heated up. You need to eat too.”

“I know, I’m just so tired to move.”

“Yeah? Do you want me to help?” he asks genuinely worried. “I can dry you off and-and, you know…p-put it in you?”

You follow his hands as he reaches for the open box of tampon and takes one out to study it curiously.

“How the hell do you get this inside though?” he asks frowning confusedly as he lifts the box to read the instructions.

“Where’s the applicator? Wait, was I supposed to buy that too? Does that come separately?”

Despite his eagerness to help, you can tell he’s slightly nervous of the idea of putting a tampon in you. The instruction and the product alone have him so baffled.

Your laughs echo through the bathroom as he blushes and chuckles along shyly.

“I’m just saying, I ain’t scared of a little blood.”

“Thanks, babe. But I got it under control.”

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