#bro you are literally Boo Zoo. get your ass on
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that-one-queer-poc Β· 2 years ago
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goofy ass gabriel statue made dave GOUGE HIS EYES OUT like he’s oedipus or some shit….. me personally i could never
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ghoul-the-crappy-artist-blog Β· 5 years ago
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Miscellaneous stuff from a character discussion chat in a BNHA rp server that I'm apart of, found these gems recently and decided to share them with ya'll out of boredom, (some of these are very old btw):
Someone: "so your willing to risk your life for this? Thats noble but.. you do know there's a high chance for death right?"
Jade: "oh yeah, I know. im mainly just agreeing to this because I think I can outrun anything."
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Jade: is pissed off "I may smile all the time honey, but I've got a mean f*cking back hand and I'm not afraid to use it on your ugly a** :) "
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Jade: "if I run at them, they will most certainly catch me in their arms." runs at friend and both topple over, braking a table in the process on their way to the ground.
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Villian: is very confused and expected something different. "um.. what are you wearing..?"
Jade: wearing mixed matched clothes from different aesthetic genres. "it's my ass kicking outfit b*tch!"
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Jade: trying to sound smart but is also very tired. "steampunk is only a thing because some goths discovered the color brown."
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Jade: yells at bad guys "I'm 8 ounches of whoop-ass!"
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Jade: proceeds to scare everyone as a jump scare happens while watching a horror movie, then proceeds to get pelted with pillows.
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Villian: "why don't you just go down and die with diginity??"
Jade: "HA jokes on you! I don't do anything with dignity!"
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Jade: being forced to watch over kids and gets bored so she decides to mess with them in order to entertain herself "now remember kids, rats are the capri-suns of the vampire world!"
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Jade: walks into her therapists office "hello person with a degree! I'm here to tell you why I'm broken."
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Jade: franticly texting her classmates while unknowingly in a villains lair/villian territory "this is a mass text- DOES ANYONE KNOW WE'RE I AM?"
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Jade: looks at her the angery rival whos busy trying to be edgy "pff, who is this sad lost child?"
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Person: "hehe people love me! I'm like cupid~"
Jade: "your a whore with a bow & arrow."
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Person: "lol I've never seen someone so pathetic!"
Jade: "oh, did you look in a mirror?"
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Friend: "um.. why are you so quiet today?"
Jade: "no one plans murder out loud.."
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Jade: "well that was fun!"
Person: "no it wasn't, we went to jail!!"
Jade: "nah, we went to Holland. Big difference."
(If you get this reference, your amazing)
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Jade: "I saw a piece of shit on the ground the other day and it reminded me of you."
Iro: "yeah? Well that piece of shit probably gets more looks then your gremlin lookin' ass."
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Villain: "I'm gonna kill you! I'm so powerful, not even all of you combined can stop me!"
Class 1-A: "yeah um.. we don't think Jade will let us die.. let us ask her tho." looks at jade. "hey this Villain says-"
Villain: "that's not how this works-"
Jade: looking at her classmates with a super serious expression and cracking her knuckles. "No."
Class 1-A: turns back to the Villain and shrugs. "yeah, she said no."
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Jade: "you ever just think that.. sweet-tarts are just sour smarties..? And that rice is just boiled wheat?"
Person: "jade.. how high are you?"
Jade: "huh? Oh.. about, like 5'6."
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Jade: "positive words of the day: if your ever sad, just remember- Doofenshmirtz's girlfriend left him for a whale."
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Jade: "I'd sell you to Satan for one corn chip."
Rival: "last week when someone called me weak during training; you tackled them and broke their jaw with your bare hands out of anger."
Jade: "..."
Rival: "..."
Jade: "irrelevant."
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Jade: "I don't know why people think driving is so hard, it's just like Mario cart except slower.. and you can't throw blue shells at people."
Parents: "okay.. that settles it, your never driving."
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Jade: talking to a bully "I'm only gonna say this once- DO NOT f*ck with my friends. I have watched way to many crime shows, and I know how to get away with things."
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Jade: "I like a nice nap, my naps can last up to 3 hours. Some call that depression- I call it nap time."
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Jade: "what do you mean? I'm always calm and rational with minor inconveniences!"
Friend: "you had a mental brake down yesterday when we were out of gummy worms."
Jade: "so? Their my favorite.."
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Jade: smirks while looking out the window.
Friend: "hm? What'cha smiling at over there Jade-"
Person: "she set the old golf course on fire to see what would burn."
Jade: filled with glee and holding back laughter. "Hehe-..everything's ablaze."
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Jade: is out with friends one night and parents get brung up in the conversation. "..."
Jade: looks off into the distense and into the depths of the city and raises her middle finger. "f*ck you dad."
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Friend: has all the sads
Jade: le gasp "don't worry! I have emotional jumper cables!"
Jade: hugs friend then locks her hands together while her arms are around them.
Friend: confused "um.. Jade, this is just a hug-.."
Jade: "yeah, but.. is it working?" smiles happily like a lil kid
Friend: "..."
Friend: "maybe.."
Jade: :D
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Child Jade: "i don't understand why you are scared to meet new people, strangers are just friends you haven't met yet!"
Friend: "that's how you get mugged or murdered.."
Child Jade: "..hmmm... would they stab me with friendship..?"
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Apolaki: at the theme park "how much for the horse tornado??"
Jade: "it's called a carousel.."
Amusment Park Worker: "sir, It's not for sale."
Apolaki: quietly to himself 'I must have it..!'
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Person: "so you guys got kicked out of the movies? Uuh.. do i even nedd to ask why?"
Jade: "Iro and I were yelling diving scores as people were jumping of the boat in titanic."
Person: "wtf-"
Iro: "that last guy was a solid eight let me tell you."
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Dad: "why can't you just be normal for once??"
Jade: "oohh I don't know, why can't you be a good father for once?"
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Jade: "studying? Heh more like student dying! Am I right or am I right?"
Person: "um.. Jade, are you ok..?"
Jade: "nope! Ha ha.., I've been awake for 103 hours."
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Jade: "no no no- I'm fine, it was pretty cool! I went in there and he was all like 'Knife to meet you' and then stabbed me-"
Gin: "JADE YOU WERE STABBED- !?"
Jade: "yeah but, you don't understand- he made a PUN Gin."
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Jade: "how to you orangize a galactic party?"
Rival: "I don't really care, but how?"
Jade: "hehe, you.. Planet !"
Rival: "get tf out.."
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Person: "Im like Belle because she loves books and likes people for their souls."
Jade: "I'm like Tinkerbelle because she needs attention and love or else she dies."
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Jade: singing "I want to see my little boy~"
Harper: walks into the room while holding up Apolaki "here he comes~!'
Jade: throwing confetti "I want to see my little boy~!"
Apolaki: *has no idea what vine is, so is very confused*
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Uda over text: "I miss those bro posts, bro."
Kumoji over text: "I miss your eyes, bro."
Uda: "bro.." :0
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Uda: "if I run and jump at Kumoji, he will most certainly catch me in his arms!" runs full speed at Kumoji
Kumoji: steps to the side to avoid it
Uda: runs into the wall "oOf
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Jade: "um.. what'cha got there Uda?"
Uda: standing in front of a lion that he stole from the zoo, and that he put a leash & a hat on while holding a drink "a smoothie."
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Jade: "I want to look like a snack this summer, but I keep f*cking eating them."
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Jade: "limes are the off brand warheads of the lemon world."
Kanna: "uuh yeah hey-, what the f*ck does this mean??"
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Child Jade: "when I become 99 pounds I want to eat 1 pound of sugar, so that I can be 1% candy!"
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Jade: dancing around and singing like like a Disney princess "i wish to venture in the great wide somewhere~"
Kanna: opens door "you can do that, no one's stopping you."
Jade: flops onto her bed "but not today cuz I am tired~"
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Person: gets a bruise or small cut "ouchies I have a boo boo! Looks like I can't do anything at all till it heals." :)
Jade: Is literally deku during the end of the training camp arc with cuts, bruises, a significant loss of blood, and two broken arms "let's do this- come at me bish."
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Jade: "eh whatever, I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80."
Kanna: "if your alive by 80 I DEMAND A MEDICAL EXPLAINATION"
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Jade: "you ever think about how.. the brain named itself?"
Kanna: sigh "its too early for this late night shit.."
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Uda, Gin, and Jade: finds a villain disguised as a injured civilian who looks close to death
Jade: in a monokuma voice internally: "pupupupupu~ a body has been discovered!" externally: "oh no-"
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Jade: "one time I passed by Kanna in the hallway. it looked like she was eating a apple, but when I got closer, I realised.. she was eating a whole bell pepper.."
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Jade: puts on fancy overly bedazzled sunglasses "words can't hurt me, these shades are gucci."
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Jade at the end of a long school day: "goodbye everyone! I'll remember you all in therapy."
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