#bring the damn birdseed || crack

[plagued-yakuza]

“I guess you can say - how do you say it on the internet, Chrono?” Overhaul spares a glance over his shoulder as his older brother leans closer and whispers in his ear. The oyabun nods softly in comprehension, his ever impassive demeanor undisturbed even by the following words:

“Guess who’s back?”

[plagued-yakuza]

"I wasn't sheltered. I just... Didn't mingle as much with other children when I was younger. Had better things to do."

"What is this emo thing, what exactly does it mean?"

plagued-yakuza

“I… Rawr? Middle School emo phase? Lady, I have no idea of what you’re talking about.”

“Though I do like Panic! At the Disco. Does it have anything to do with it?”

“How have you not heard any of this? What kind of sheltered asshole are you?”

“… Yes. Panic at the Disco is an emo staple. Congrats you’re proving my point.”

[pengiesama]

Ahh you don't mind taking more requests? You're the best! Could you do something with a pet-owner!Mikleo? Take your time!

oops accidental werewolf AU

--

Mikleo was an animal fan in the general sense. Really, hewas. He set out birdseed in the winter, and hit the little “donate” button onthe card swiper when checking out at the pet store. In the more personal sense,well, his fish tank was something to behold – squeaky-clean, expertly pH-balanced,and interior decorated to the nines. And he always petted Lailah’s cat when hevisited her place.

Dogs, though…

The abstract concept of Dog was fine. Mikleo could fullyadmit to tearing up at heartwarming stories of canine loyalty on his Twitterfeed. The more immediate concept of Dog, with long, sharp teeth and guttural snarls,that was less fine.

But even someone like Mikleo with reservations on the Dogconcept couldn’t just pass by a situation like this.

“H-hey, it’s alright.” Mikleo tried to keep the tremors outof his voice and out of his limbs as he approached the wounded, wet creature coweringin the bush. Its terrified little whimpers made Mikleo’s heart ache, but couldnot quite cut through Mikleo’s hesitation in approaching a strange, wounded animal.

Mikleo remembered an emergency blanket he had in his trunk. Itwas pretty big – though this dog was pretty big too – and maybe, Mikleo couldget it wrapped around the animal, and get it to the emergency vet hospital –

As Mikleo carefully approached with the emergency blanket,making soothing noises, the dog appeared to relax. Its eyes fell shut, and itcollapsed to the ground with a sigh. Before Mikleo could properly panic, therewas a flash of light, and in the dog’s place was a naked man.

Mikleo gaped, then looked from the man, to the blanket, andback.

Well.

--

Sorey groaned as he awoke, placing a hand on his throbbinghead. The werewolf thing had to kick in at such inconvenient times. Heremembered getting caught off-guard and turning, then running off in a panic toget home…then, nearly getting swiped by a car and tumbling down a ditch intothe thorny brush…then, lying there in a heap until he saw headlights, and a guyapproaching him…

…a really, really cuteguy…

Sorey considered his current situation, afraid to open hiseyes. He seemed to be lying on a comfy bed, in a warm room – definitely hadn’tbeen turned in as a test subject, then. So, instead, that means that he passedout on his cute savior and made a huge naked idiot of himself.

He almost would’ve preferred getting turned in to thegovernment.

Sorey cracked open an eye hesitantly. The room was cozy,with a large bookcase covering one entire wall and a fish tank coveringanother. Framed awards and medical degrees covered the remaining space. Soreyhimself was dressed in a too-small bathrobe, and was tucked under the covers ofa small but comfy bed. He slowly, carefully rose into a sitting position,trying to take stock of his injuries. His head ached, and his limbs werecovered in scratches both large and small. A few of the deepest cuts had beenstitched shut and covered in gauze.

So he’d made this cute stranger get soaked in the rain, draga naked, bleeding guy home in his car, and sacrifice his bed and bathrobe forthe night. Maybe he’d at least let Sorey take him out to dinner in thanks.

…maybe that wouldn’t be the best thing to bring up when heslinked out of the room. But it wasn’t like he had anything more to lose atthis point. Rock bottom, nowhere to go but up.

The bedroom door creaked open, and Sorey’s heart damn nearstopped. He was even cuter when he wasn’t framed in a halo by the glow of hisheadlights. His savior carried a plate heaped with bacon and eggs and a cup ofcoffee. If Sorey didn’t believe in love at first sight before this, well…

“…I have to admit, I was almost glad of that littleswitcharoo you pulled back there. I’ve got more experience patching up humans,”the guy said. “I figured you’d want some protein.”

“Yes,” Sorey said, probably too quickly. Abashed, he rubbedat his neck. “Uh, thank you. For…all that.”

The guy must have been creeped out by how Sorey was staringat him, so he set breakfast on the nightstand to the side of the bed. That wasn’twhat Sorey was staring at, but he’d take it.

“Go ahead. I’m Mikleo, by the way.”

Mikleo. Mikleo-who-made-him-breakfast-and-saved-his-life.The name made Sorey’s heart sing.

“Fssworeh,” Sorey said around a mouthful of egg and bacon.

Mikleo rose an eyebrow. Sorey took a moment to chew andswallow.

“…sorry. Sorey. That—that thing you saw me as; it takes alot out of me.”

He couldn’t help but notice the small smile tugging atMikleo’s lips.

“Well, eat up. And rest a bit more, you were prettyscratched up. You’re welcome to stay a bit longer until I can get you someclothes to go out in--”

“—will you go out too?” Sorey interrupted, almost unable tostop himself. “With me? Maybe Saturday?”

Mikleo blinked. Sorey wanted to punch himself.

“Um. To thank you. And to—talk about your book collection. Ilike your fish,” Sorey babbled helplessly.

“Saturday is fine. If you’re healed up before then, that is.”

[plagued-yakuza]

@purepestilence​ - from here.  

Overhaul blinks quietly at that offer, the brief shock soon giving way to a disapproving stare. He crosses his fingers elegantly, staring down at Aiko in a politely displeasured stance.

“Not at all. And I’d rather not know why you have those.”

[plagued-yakuza]

Is watching the other Overhauls bicker while drinking tea.

[plagued-yakuza]

*anon vc* i hope you get socks, chisaki

“And I hope you get some manners, Research Subject.”

[plagued-yakuza]

“So the logical deduction is that I’m everyone’s favorite Overhaul.”

“If you don't see that, you're lying to yourself.”

[plagued-yakuza]

“....Birdseed...?”

[plagued-yakuza]

“You think I’d believe my student lies?”

“You’re the one talking about lies, sir.”

“I’m talking about where’s your judicial justificiation for attacking me? Or are you going to hit someone without due process? I’d like to see you fighting that on court, Mr. Number One Hero.”

[plagued-yakuza]

minisodapop

  Is sitting beneath a plaque with a HIRING...

“Do you accept grapes?”

“There is no rule that yakuzas should only be human. However, we do have strict standards of discipline. Would you be up to the task?”

[plagued-yakuza]

Have you heard the word?

Stoically. “Everybody knows that the bird is the word. Or better yet, everyone except Kaito. He never watches the links I send.”

[plagued-yakuza]

“It seems like my brother lacks a boyfriend, so I’m opening up boyfriend applications for him.” 

“If you’re of age and interested, please send forward your resume for consideration. Thank you.”

[plagued-yakuza]

we need to talk about your definition of "benefit"

“It’s quite straightfoward, is it not?”

“The knowledge of how such a quirk spreads and changes the user could easily be used on the benefit of properly healing or, at least, modifying other abilities. Do enlighten me if you have another method of obtaining this sort of information.”

[plagued-yakuza]

“Good luck for it. It shall need it.”

[plagued-yakuza]

Eggs

“…..?” 

Overhaul is confused by this sudden offering of eggs, though after a brief reflection he decides he shall keep them. Who knows what those eggs may hatch into; he hopes it will either be an interesting specimen or a beautiful bird.

[plagued-yakuza]

get off my lawn

“Excuse me? Your lawn? I don’t see your name on it.” Overhaul drags his heels against the ground, a no-so-subtle show of defiance.